1 00:00:04,526 --> 00:00:08,182 ♪ 2 00:00:21,195 --> 00:00:23,675 [alarm ringing] 3 00:00:23,675 --> 00:00:27,027 ♪ 4 00:00:27,505 --> 00:00:28,680 [laughter] 5 00:00:28,680 --> 00:00:30,726 There's our distraction. 6 00:00:34,121 --> 00:00:35,078 [both smooching] 7 00:00:35,078 --> 00:00:36,297 Finally! 8 00:00:36,297 --> 00:00:37,776 Whoa. 9 00:00:37,776 --> 00:00:40,344 Hey! It's not supposed to distract us. 10 00:00:41,302 --> 00:00:47,525 ♪ 11 00:00:51,877 --> 00:00:54,489 Oh, my God, we did it! We're free! 12 00:00:54,489 --> 00:00:56,317 That tunnel you burrowed was crazy! 13 00:00:56,317 --> 00:00:58,797 We were up and down and up and down. 14 00:00:58,797 --> 00:01:01,539 That's 'cause I modeled it on that game "Chutes and Ladders." 15 00:01:01,539 --> 00:01:03,759 Oh, that game's impossible. 16 00:01:03,759 --> 00:01:05,326 Let's get out of here! 17 00:01:05,326 --> 00:01:11,419 ♪ 18 00:01:11,419 --> 00:01:14,248 The convicts are armed and dangerous, but whatever. 19 00:01:14,248 --> 00:01:16,946 Let's get to the only escape anyone cares about-- 20 00:01:16,946 --> 00:01:20,515 An adorable baby giraffe snuck out of the zoo! 21 00:01:20,515 --> 00:01:22,517 TOGETHER: Aww! 22 00:01:22,517 --> 00:01:25,041 If you see the wittle giwaffe awound town, 23 00:01:25,041 --> 00:01:27,174 pwease contact the zoo immediatwee. 24 00:01:27,174 --> 00:01:29,045 That poor little baby! 25 00:01:29,045 --> 00:01:31,221 I'll tell you what I won't be doing if I see it-- 26 00:01:31,221 --> 00:01:32,744 contacting the zoo. 27 00:01:32,744 --> 00:01:34,877 I'd show that giraffe the night of its life 28 00:01:34,877 --> 00:01:37,140 before it's hauled back to captivity forever. 29 00:01:37,140 --> 00:01:38,185 That... 30 00:01:38,185 --> 00:01:40,143 actually makes sense. 31 00:01:40,143 --> 00:01:41,884 - Yeah, screw the zoo. - Uh-huh, uh-huh. 32 00:01:41,884 --> 00:01:43,320 Great. We all agree. 33 00:01:43,320 --> 00:01:45,017 Now, you know what else would be great? 34 00:01:45,017 --> 00:01:46,541 A theme song. 35 00:01:46,541 --> 00:01:48,195 - Oh, right, right, right. - Mm. Oh, yeah. 36 00:01:48,195 --> 00:01:49,370 Eh, I don't know. 37 00:01:49,370 --> 00:01:51,894 [patriotic music plays] 38 00:01:51,894 --> 00:01:54,592 ♪ Good morning, U.S.A. ♪ 39 00:01:54,592 --> 00:01:58,422 ♪ I got a feelin' that it's gonna be a wonderful day♪ 40 00:01:58,422 --> 00:02:01,730 ♪ The sun in the sky has a smile on his face♪ 41 00:02:01,730 --> 00:02:06,038 ♪ And he's shinin' a salute to the American race♪ 42 00:02:07,910 --> 00:02:11,174 ♪ Oh, boy, it's swell to say ♪ 43 00:02:11,174 --> 00:02:13,481 -♪ Good-- ♪ -♪ Good morning, U.S.A. ♪ 44 00:02:13,481 --> 00:02:14,830 Aah! 45 00:02:16,092 --> 00:02:19,487 ♪ Good morning, U.S.A. ♪ 46 00:02:22,838 --> 00:02:24,753 I love Spirit Week! 47 00:02:24,753 --> 00:02:28,017 I'm literally bursting with school pride. 48 00:02:28,017 --> 00:02:30,411 At least I hope that's what this is. 49 00:02:30,411 --> 00:02:32,108 [growling] 50 00:02:32,108 --> 00:02:34,066 What better way to honor our school 51 00:02:34,066 --> 00:02:36,068 than a "Teachers Hall of Fame." 52 00:02:36,068 --> 00:02:38,767 Show everyone the greats who made Pearl Bailey 53 00:02:38,767 --> 00:02:40,899 the amazing school it is today. 54 00:02:40,899 --> 00:02:44,207 On premium library real estate, no less. 55 00:02:44,207 --> 00:02:46,514 How'd you lock that up, Stevie baby? 56 00:02:46,514 --> 00:02:47,993 The library has extra space 57 00:02:47,993 --> 00:02:49,995 'cause Principal Lewis destroyed most of the books 58 00:02:49,995 --> 00:02:52,781 when he and his buddies were playing flamethrower tag. 59 00:02:52,781 --> 00:02:54,348 Rest in peace, buddies. 60 00:02:55,218 --> 00:02:57,220 We're close. Let's test it out. 61 00:02:58,047 --> 00:02:59,875 I'm Mr. D'Angelo. 62 00:02:59,875 --> 00:03:03,879 I was the first teacher to say, "Talk amongst yourselves," 63 00:03:03,879 --> 00:03:06,751 and leave for the rest of the day. 64 00:03:06,751 --> 00:03:10,407 If I know our peers, they're gonna love this. 65 00:03:10,407 --> 00:03:11,452 [rumbling] 66 00:03:12,104 --> 00:03:14,237 Spirit Week, bitches! 67 00:03:14,237 --> 00:03:16,674 [screaming] 68 00:03:16,674 --> 00:03:19,721 [distorted] Isosceleeeees... 69 00:03:19,721 --> 00:03:22,376 Can you believe I'm just now discovering the magic 70 00:03:22,376 --> 00:03:25,074 of mixing Mentos and Diet Coke together? 71 00:03:25,074 --> 00:03:27,424 I'm testing out recipes for a badass foam show 72 00:03:27,424 --> 00:03:28,686 on the football field. 73 00:03:28,686 --> 00:03:30,558 Our robots are ruined! 74 00:03:30,558 --> 00:03:31,515 Pfft. 75 00:03:31,515 --> 00:03:33,474 You wanna see ruined robots, 76 00:03:33,474 --> 00:03:35,563 let me have 'em for the night. 77 00:03:35,563 --> 00:03:38,218 Spirit Week! 78 00:03:38,218 --> 00:03:40,524 Ugh, this is gonna take forever to fix. 79 00:03:40,524 --> 00:03:42,178 SNOT: What's the point, Steve? 80 00:03:42,178 --> 00:03:45,007 As long as that madman Lewis is in charge, 81 00:03:45,007 --> 00:03:46,835 this school is screwed. 82 00:03:46,835 --> 00:03:48,315 He ruins everything. 83 00:03:48,315 --> 00:03:50,534 Sorry, Steve. I'm out, too. 84 00:03:50,534 --> 00:03:53,885 All this "Spirit Week" talk is just too scary for me. 85 00:03:53,885 --> 00:03:56,061 Reminds me of ghosts. 86 00:03:56,061 --> 00:03:57,802 [speaks Japanese] 87 00:04:01,284 --> 00:04:02,503 Damn it! 88 00:04:02,503 --> 00:04:04,679 Hey, where'd your friends go? 89 00:04:07,899 --> 00:04:10,467 Please sit. I've got a lot to explain. 90 00:04:10,467 --> 00:04:13,035 You're the lawyer for all the school bus drivers, right? 91 00:04:13,035 --> 00:04:14,558 No, I'm a kid... 92 00:04:14,558 --> 00:04:16,430 here to file a formal complaint. 93 00:04:16,430 --> 00:04:18,562 Against Principal Lewis. 94 00:04:18,562 --> 00:04:20,869 Ah, yes, yes, a kid. 95 00:04:20,869 --> 00:04:23,045 You realize how serious this is? 96 00:04:23,045 --> 00:04:25,743 I do, but I love Pearl Bailey, 97 00:04:25,743 --> 00:04:28,093 and Principal Lewis is a destructive menace 98 00:04:28,093 --> 00:04:30,531 who doesn't care about the school. 99 00:04:30,531 --> 00:04:32,489 He ruined my Spirit Week project, 100 00:04:32,489 --> 00:04:35,100 he hired his cousin Dale as a school nurse, 101 00:04:35,100 --> 00:04:36,928 and all he does is smoke cigarettes, 102 00:04:36,928 --> 00:04:39,148 plus, Lewis taught a group of crows 103 00:04:39,148 --> 00:04:42,020 to attack anyone with a rolling backpack. 104 00:04:43,457 --> 00:04:45,763 Legally I can't admit fault of any kind, 105 00:04:45,763 --> 00:04:48,113 as you know, being a kid lawyer and all. 106 00:04:48,113 --> 00:04:49,724 Well, you have to do something! 107 00:04:49,724 --> 00:04:51,421 This is a formal complaint. 108 00:04:51,421 --> 00:04:53,641 Fine. I'll open an investigation. 109 00:04:53,641 --> 00:04:55,947 Hey, before I get into this school bus fiasco, 110 00:04:55,947 --> 00:04:57,340 let me ask you something-- 111 00:04:57,340 --> 00:04:59,255 What's the fastest you'd feel comfortable 112 00:04:59,255 --> 00:05:00,996 being thrown from a school bus? 113 00:05:00,996 --> 00:05:03,825 I'm looking for a number over 70. 114 00:05:04,695 --> 00:05:07,176 ♪ 115 00:05:07,176 --> 00:05:09,352 No, reach higher, Jeff! 116 00:05:09,352 --> 00:05:11,572 I need the big juicy ones. 117 00:05:11,572 --> 00:05:14,705 You guys want my apple salsa to be good, right? 118 00:05:14,705 --> 00:05:16,098 We do. 119 00:05:16,098 --> 00:05:18,492 Just grab the big juicy ones, Jeff! 120 00:05:18,492 --> 00:05:20,189 No, higher, Jeff! 121 00:05:20,189 --> 00:05:22,278 The big juicy ones! 122 00:05:22,278 --> 00:05:25,281 [distorted shouting] 123 00:05:25,281 --> 00:05:26,587 Ahh! 124 00:05:26,587 --> 00:05:27,849 [distorted shouting] 125 00:05:27,849 --> 00:05:29,981 [distorted talking] 126 00:05:32,897 --> 00:05:34,159 [distorted talking] 127 00:05:34,159 --> 00:05:36,640 [distorted conversation] 128 00:05:36,640 --> 00:05:38,033 [distorted talking] 129 00:05:38,033 --> 00:05:40,122 [distorted shouting] 130 00:05:43,778 --> 00:05:45,823 Was it worth it, Jeff? 131 00:05:45,823 --> 00:05:49,261 Disrespecting me to pet a giraffe? 132 00:05:49,261 --> 00:05:51,742 ♪ 133 00:05:51,742 --> 00:05:53,396 I'll bet you guys never had 134 00:05:53,396 --> 00:05:56,399 to sneak in at night to avoid an insane principal. 135 00:05:56,399 --> 00:05:58,836 Yeah, you legends were probably too busy 136 00:05:58,836 --> 00:06:00,316 to come in at night anyway. 137 00:06:00,316 --> 00:06:02,492 VIP-ing your way around town, 138 00:06:02,492 --> 00:06:04,407 banging everything with a heartbeat. 139 00:06:04,407 --> 00:06:05,930 LEAD CONVICT: Would you just come on? 140 00:06:05,930 --> 00:06:07,802 Gotta hide for a second. 141 00:06:07,802 --> 00:06:10,544 Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. 142 00:06:12,546 --> 00:06:14,809 Yeah. Here they are, 143 00:06:14,809 --> 00:06:16,767 the blueprints to the school. 144 00:06:16,767 --> 00:06:20,205 Not really sure why late-night copy machine repairmen 145 00:06:20,205 --> 00:06:21,555 would need these, but-- 146 00:06:22,425 --> 00:06:23,644 Perfect. 147 00:06:23,644 --> 00:06:25,428 These'll show us the structural points 148 00:06:25,428 --> 00:06:27,169 where we need to plant the dynamite... 149 00:06:27,169 --> 00:06:30,433 to blow this school to smithereens. 150 00:06:30,433 --> 00:06:32,479 - [gasps] - [groans] 151 00:06:34,524 --> 00:06:37,614 [weakly] All. Clean. 152 00:06:37,614 --> 00:06:39,268 [coughs] 153 00:06:42,489 --> 00:06:44,491 LEAD CONVICT: All right, we got the blueprints. 154 00:06:44,491 --> 00:06:46,449 But we still have a huge problem. 155 00:06:46,449 --> 00:06:49,278 Where are we gonna unroll them? 156 00:06:49,278 --> 00:06:51,454 How 'bout the table by them robots, boss? 157 00:06:51,454 --> 00:06:53,151 LEAD CONVICT: Good eye. 158 00:06:57,852 --> 00:07:00,332 You know, one day humans are gonna only sex 159 00:07:00,332 --> 00:07:01,638 each other through robots. 160 00:07:01,638 --> 00:07:03,118 How do you know that? 161 00:07:03,118 --> 00:07:04,554 Because my aunt used to say it 162 00:07:04,554 --> 00:07:06,687 whenever we went to Chuck E. Cheese. 163 00:07:06,687 --> 00:07:09,994 Okay, let's hit here, here, and here, 164 00:07:09,994 --> 00:07:12,214 and we'll start with the boiler room. 165 00:07:12,214 --> 00:07:15,304 Come on. Let's get started. 166 00:07:19,264 --> 00:07:22,790 ♪ I'm gonna take my class to the old classroom♪ 167 00:07:22,790 --> 00:07:24,487 -♪ I'm gonna teach ♪ - Oh, my, God, they work! 168 00:07:24,487 --> 00:07:26,576 -♪ Till I can't no more ♪ - Shit. 169 00:07:26,576 --> 00:07:28,883 ♪ I'm gonna take my class... ♪ 170 00:07:28,883 --> 00:07:30,754 One of the robots is making a break for it! 171 00:07:30,754 --> 00:07:31,886 That's a kid. 172 00:07:31,886 --> 00:07:33,627 Toad-Button, you go after him. 173 00:07:33,627 --> 00:07:35,324 We'll start planting the bombs. 174 00:07:36,978 --> 00:07:38,936 Thank goodness I wore my brand-new 175 00:07:38,936 --> 00:07:40,547 Skerchers SuperSpeeders. 176 00:07:40,547 --> 00:07:42,244 ANNOUNCER: That's right, Dadders! 177 00:07:42,244 --> 00:07:45,334 Steve wears the brand-new Skerchers SuperSpeeders 178 00:07:45,334 --> 00:07:47,075 by Skerchers Sneakers. 179 00:07:47,075 --> 00:07:49,730 Now with real rubber. 180 00:07:51,035 --> 00:07:52,515 Aah! 181 00:07:52,515 --> 00:07:53,908 If you're gonna kill me, 182 00:07:53,908 --> 00:07:56,476 pass along my funeral requests to my friend Snot. 183 00:07:56,476 --> 00:08:01,437 Tell him-- open casket, eyes wide, huge smile. 184 00:08:01,437 --> 00:08:03,091 Oh, thank God, it's you. 185 00:08:03,091 --> 00:08:04,658 You're too kind, Steve. 186 00:08:04,658 --> 00:08:07,835 I wish everyone was as happy to have me around as you. 187 00:08:07,835 --> 00:08:10,490 I guess someone formally complained about me. 188 00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:12,970 The superintendent wants to meet with me in the morning. 189 00:08:12,970 --> 00:08:14,755 I'm as good as gone. 190 00:08:14,755 --> 00:08:16,757 Just grabbing my most important stuff in case 191 00:08:16,757 --> 00:08:19,107 I'm not allowed back on the premises. 192 00:08:19,107 --> 00:08:21,805 Gosh, that's terrible about the investigation. 193 00:08:21,805 --> 00:08:23,415 Did I say "investigation"? 194 00:08:23,415 --> 00:08:26,157 Some guys broke in, and they're gonna blow up the school! 195 00:08:26,157 --> 00:08:27,898 Let 'em! Screw this place! 196 00:08:27,898 --> 00:08:29,770 Oh, man, I love it here! 197 00:08:29,770 --> 00:08:31,119 This'll be a great talk for later. 198 00:08:31,119 --> 00:08:33,121 They're looking for me. We gotta go! 199 00:08:33,121 --> 00:08:34,905 It's not fair! 200 00:08:34,905 --> 00:08:36,646 I just finally fundraised enough money 201 00:08:36,646 --> 00:08:38,648 to trick out my office. 202 00:08:38,648 --> 00:08:41,521 [mid-tempo music plays] 203 00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:44,349 You lovin' these hydraulics? 204 00:08:46,308 --> 00:08:48,136 [gunshots] 205 00:08:48,136 --> 00:08:50,921 You didn't mention the guys with bombs had guns, too! 206 00:08:50,921 --> 00:08:52,488 Bullets are my Kryptonite! 207 00:08:52,488 --> 00:08:53,794 Follow me. 208 00:08:53,794 --> 00:08:55,317 [pounding on door] 209 00:08:55,317 --> 00:08:57,493 ♪ 210 00:08:59,277 --> 00:09:00,670 You're lucky you're with me. 211 00:09:00,670 --> 00:09:02,324 No one knows this school like I do. 212 00:09:02,324 --> 00:09:03,586 I should call the police. 213 00:09:03,586 --> 00:09:05,893 Damn, no service down here. 214 00:09:05,893 --> 00:09:10,637 Oh, God forbid a kid goes five minutes without his phone. 215 00:09:10,637 --> 00:09:12,682 I'm trying to save the school! 216 00:09:12,682 --> 00:09:15,511 I can't believe my fate's in your crazy-ass hands. 217 00:09:15,511 --> 00:09:19,167 They're so crazy, they just might work. 218 00:09:20,124 --> 00:09:21,909 Hey, they worked! 219 00:09:24,694 --> 00:09:26,000 So? 220 00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:27,523 How pimp is this place! 221 00:09:27,523 --> 00:09:28,916 It's uh, great. Where's the exit? 222 00:09:28,916 --> 00:09:30,439 Nowhere. We kick back 223 00:09:30,439 --> 00:09:32,354 and wait it out here until this blows over. 224 00:09:32,354 --> 00:09:33,616 "Wait it out"? 225 00:09:33,616 --> 00:09:34,922 What if they find us? 226 00:09:34,922 --> 00:09:37,620 And what about the school blowing up? 227 00:09:37,620 --> 00:09:41,232 We're fine. This is my panic room, and it's bombproof. 228 00:09:41,232 --> 00:09:44,061 Designed it myself. Even built the fireplace. 229 00:09:44,061 --> 00:09:45,410 Briiick. 230 00:09:45,410 --> 00:09:47,064 Just relax, Smith. 231 00:09:47,064 --> 00:09:49,110 Can I get you a drink? Are you a brandy kid? 232 00:09:49,110 --> 00:09:51,025 Oh, hey, you mind taking your shoes off? 233 00:09:51,025 --> 00:09:52,983 You destroyed the library with foam 234 00:09:52,983 --> 00:09:56,378 and you want me to take off my shoes? 235 00:09:57,858 --> 00:09:59,511 This is such bullshit. 236 00:09:59,511 --> 00:10:01,688 Look at all the work you did down here, 237 00:10:01,688 --> 00:10:04,821 but you can't be bothered to care about the actual school. 238 00:10:04,821 --> 00:10:07,737 Smith, I do my job better than anybody. 239 00:10:07,737 --> 00:10:09,521 And whoever reported me to the superintendent 240 00:10:09,521 --> 00:10:11,175 - got it as wrong as you. - [pounding on door] 241 00:10:11,175 --> 00:10:13,177 Aah! Toad-Button found us! 242 00:10:13,177 --> 00:10:14,657 Did you say... 243 00:10:14,657 --> 00:10:15,745 Toad-Button? 244 00:10:15,745 --> 00:10:17,355 Yeah, what a stupid name. 245 00:10:17,355 --> 00:10:20,010 Well, could be cute on the right guy. 246 00:10:20,010 --> 00:10:21,403 Is this who was chasing you? 247 00:10:21,403 --> 00:10:22,970 That's him! 248 00:10:22,970 --> 00:10:25,712 Damn, he's aged very well. 249 00:10:25,712 --> 00:10:28,062 Everything always works out for the bad boys. 250 00:10:28,062 --> 00:10:30,020 I should've known they'd be back. 251 00:10:30,020 --> 00:10:32,501 Of course they're your former students. 252 00:10:32,501 --> 00:10:35,112 You've been terrorizing kids for 30 years. 253 00:10:35,112 --> 00:10:38,681 [sighs] Man, '94 was a hell of a class. 254 00:10:38,681 --> 00:10:40,988 - Those kids could dress. - [pounding continues] 255 00:10:42,772 --> 00:10:44,818 This place is bombproof, huh? 256 00:10:44,818 --> 00:10:46,167 What do we do? 257 00:10:46,167 --> 00:10:49,213 Oh, people got so hammered at that prom. 258 00:10:49,213 --> 00:10:50,650 At least I did. 259 00:10:52,826 --> 00:10:54,697 The chimney's our only way out! 260 00:10:54,697 --> 00:10:56,481 Yes. Into the Christmas tunnel. 261 00:10:56,481 --> 00:10:59,571 [pounding continues] 262 00:11:01,965 --> 00:11:03,097 The gym? 263 00:11:04,707 --> 00:11:06,796 Dang, I got something in my eye. 264 00:11:06,796 --> 00:11:08,058 Do you see anything? 265 00:11:10,800 --> 00:11:12,715 Aah! 266 00:11:12,715 --> 00:11:14,891 [device beeping] 267 00:11:16,763 --> 00:11:19,548 Why would you build a chimney into another room? 268 00:11:19,548 --> 00:11:21,202 [whispering] I only had this many bricks. 269 00:11:21,202 --> 00:11:23,726 [whispering] This is why all our gym teachers have lung disease. 270 00:11:23,726 --> 00:11:26,816 Well, no one seemed to mind when it smoked out all the pigeons. 271 00:11:26,816 --> 00:11:29,645 Yep, those are Toad-Button's buddies. 272 00:11:29,645 --> 00:11:31,342 Yeah, it's beautiful they stayed in touch, 273 00:11:31,342 --> 00:11:32,822 but how are we getting out of here? 274 00:11:32,822 --> 00:11:34,824 Don't worry. There's gotta be something in my bag 275 00:11:34,824 --> 00:11:35,912 that can help us. 276 00:11:35,912 --> 00:11:38,698 Useful, useful, useful... 277 00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:40,743 but not for this. 278 00:11:40,743 --> 00:11:41,918 A cord? 279 00:11:41,918 --> 00:11:43,572 I don't remember packing a-- 280 00:11:45,139 --> 00:11:46,836 [muffled grunting] 281 00:11:46,836 --> 00:11:49,534 Did you... hear something? 282 00:11:49,534 --> 00:11:51,841 I've heard that the dry-cleaning business will eat you alive 283 00:11:51,841 --> 00:11:53,277 if you don't have the right mentor. 284 00:11:53,277 --> 00:11:56,759 Hmm, I'm not sure that's what it was. 285 00:11:56,759 --> 00:11:58,239 But maybe. 286 00:12:02,243 --> 00:12:03,461 We can get out there! 287 00:12:05,899 --> 00:12:08,640 Okay, that's the last of the explosives. 288 00:12:08,640 --> 00:12:10,730 Now we just wait until that bastard Lewis 289 00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:14,559 shows up in the morning so he can watch it happen. 290 00:12:16,823 --> 00:12:19,129 Are you flirting with me, Smith? 291 00:12:19,129 --> 00:12:21,131 No! I'm flirting with death, 292 00:12:21,131 --> 00:12:23,090 and it sounds like they're here because of you. 293 00:12:23,090 --> 00:12:25,135 Pft. That's why I'm here. 294 00:12:25,135 --> 00:12:27,659 ♪ 295 00:12:27,659 --> 00:12:29,531 Play it cool. 296 00:12:29,531 --> 00:12:33,013 We are six non-giraffes looking for a place to eat. 297 00:12:33,013 --> 00:12:34,754 Right this way. 298 00:12:38,453 --> 00:12:40,847 [distorted talking] 299 00:12:40,847 --> 00:12:43,066 [distorted talking] 300 00:12:50,247 --> 00:12:53,773 [distorted singing to the tune of "Happy Birthday"] 301 00:12:56,993 --> 00:12:58,081 [dramatic music plays] 302 00:12:58,081 --> 00:13:01,171 [screeching] 303 00:13:04,131 --> 00:13:05,610 We should go. 304 00:13:05,610 --> 00:13:07,874 My brother-in-law is upset because he prefers 305 00:13:07,874 --> 00:13:10,224 the Stevie Wonder version of "Happy Birthday." 306 00:13:10,224 --> 00:13:12,095 We'll obviously be paying for none of this 307 00:13:12,095 --> 00:13:13,488 and taking it all to go. 308 00:13:13,488 --> 00:13:16,273 And toss a couple White Russians in here. 309 00:13:17,187 --> 00:13:20,843 Uhh, it feels so good to talk at full volume again! 310 00:13:20,843 --> 00:13:22,105 [loudly] ♪ La la la ♪ 311 00:13:22,105 --> 00:13:23,411 [whispering] Shut up! 312 00:13:23,411 --> 00:13:24,934 We're almost home free. 313 00:13:24,934 --> 00:13:27,197 Just gotta figure out how to get down. 314 00:13:27,197 --> 00:13:28,895 I got us covered. 315 00:13:33,290 --> 00:13:35,902 Wow, two inflatable Grim Reapers made the cut. 316 00:13:35,902 --> 00:13:37,251 - Grims. - What? 317 00:13:37,251 --> 00:13:38,513 Grims Reaper. 318 00:13:38,513 --> 00:13:40,645 It's the same as "brothers-in-law." 319 00:13:40,645 --> 00:13:42,604 I have two Grims Reaper. 320 00:13:42,604 --> 00:13:43,866 I'm sorry to nitpick. 321 00:13:43,866 --> 00:13:46,869 That's just one of my biggest pets peeve. 322 00:13:46,869 --> 00:13:48,218 Okay, so what now? 323 00:13:48,218 --> 00:13:49,350 Climb on. 324 00:13:49,350 --> 00:13:51,352 I'll puncture it, and it'll deflate, 325 00:13:51,352 --> 00:13:53,876 sinking you down to the ground, where you can run to safety. 326 00:13:53,876 --> 00:13:57,619 That's actually a great idea. 327 00:13:57,619 --> 00:13:59,055 Wait, just me? 328 00:13:59,055 --> 00:14:00,883 This is where we part ways, Smith. 329 00:14:00,883 --> 00:14:02,624 I'm their principal, and I think 330 00:14:02,624 --> 00:14:04,582 I can still get through to them before it's too late. 331 00:14:04,582 --> 00:14:06,802 But you're not their principal anymore. 332 00:14:06,802 --> 00:14:09,196 Being a principal is like being a murderer, Smith-- 333 00:14:09,196 --> 00:14:11,067 You carry that label forever. 334 00:14:11,067 --> 00:14:13,287 Forget about them. They hate you. 335 00:14:13,287 --> 00:14:15,419 So? I saved you, didn't I? 336 00:14:15,419 --> 00:14:18,248 And you're the one who reported me to the superintendent. 337 00:14:18,248 --> 00:14:20,076 You-- You knew that? 338 00:14:20,076 --> 00:14:21,773 And you've still been helping me? 339 00:14:21,773 --> 00:14:24,733 Of course I have. I'm your principal. 340 00:14:24,733 --> 00:14:26,213 And whether you approve of my style 341 00:14:26,213 --> 00:14:29,303 or not, I take my role very seriously. 342 00:14:31,479 --> 00:14:35,004 Now I've got students to get through to. 343 00:14:36,092 --> 00:14:37,528 Aah! Toad-Button! 344 00:14:37,528 --> 00:14:39,226 You startled me. 345 00:14:39,226 --> 00:14:43,230 Nice to see you again, Principal Lewis. 346 00:14:43,230 --> 00:14:44,796 Heyyyy. 347 00:14:46,755 --> 00:14:48,191 Principal Lewis, I've decided 348 00:14:48,191 --> 00:14:50,193 that I can't leave you here alone. 349 00:14:50,193 --> 00:14:52,804 Y'know, I see you're a big fan of pistol-whipping. 350 00:14:52,804 --> 00:14:54,937 But you know what knocks me out? 351 00:14:54,937 --> 00:14:56,939 Bebop jazz. 352 00:14:56,939 --> 00:14:58,245 [jazz music plays] 353 00:14:59,594 --> 00:15:01,857 ♪ 354 00:15:01,857 --> 00:15:03,250 We thought we were gonna have to wait 355 00:15:03,250 --> 00:15:05,165 until morning for you to show up, 356 00:15:05,165 --> 00:15:09,517 but I should've known you'd be here, working late. 357 00:15:09,517 --> 00:15:11,475 I wasn't working. I swear! 358 00:15:11,475 --> 00:15:12,781 Those days are behind me! 359 00:15:12,781 --> 00:15:14,130 I-I can vouch for that. 360 00:15:14,130 --> 00:15:15,827 Yeah, right. 361 00:15:15,827 --> 00:15:18,961 Now you're gonna watch us destroy your precious school, 362 00:15:18,961 --> 00:15:22,312 just like you destroyed our lives. 363 00:15:22,312 --> 00:15:23,835 Guys, you can't. 364 00:15:23,835 --> 00:15:25,925 You do something this big and leave two eyewitnesses, 365 00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:27,187 you're gonna get caught. 366 00:15:27,187 --> 00:15:30,930 Then maybe we don't leave any witnesses. 367 00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:32,235 [sobbing] 368 00:15:32,235 --> 00:15:34,194 Look, I know I ruined your lives, 369 00:15:34,194 --> 00:15:35,891 but let me help you now. 370 00:15:35,891 --> 00:15:38,981 I got a guy in Mexico who can set you up with new identities. 371 00:15:38,981 --> 00:15:40,591 Plus he works at the Hilton pool. 372 00:15:40,591 --> 00:15:42,245 You can swim, get some sun. 373 00:15:42,245 --> 00:15:43,551 Those amazing rolled-up towels. 374 00:15:43,551 --> 00:15:44,595 Mm, huh? Mm? 375 00:15:44,595 --> 00:15:45,945 Don't listen, boss. 376 00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:48,773 He'll say anything to save his beloved school. 377 00:15:48,773 --> 00:15:50,688 I'm sorry. Beloved school? 378 00:15:50,688 --> 00:15:52,125 Working late? 379 00:15:52,125 --> 00:15:54,257 Are we talking about the same Principal Lewis? 380 00:15:54,257 --> 00:15:56,520 This guy disbanded the school chorus because 381 00:15:56,520 --> 00:16:00,220 he was afraid the singing might "attract Sasquatches." 382 00:16:00,220 --> 00:16:02,222 I don't know what he's been up to recently, kid. 383 00:16:02,222 --> 00:16:03,919 We've been in jail. 384 00:16:03,919 --> 00:16:06,966 But how about we tell you our experience with Lewis? 385 00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:09,011 Okay, so back in the early '90s-- 386 00:16:09,011 --> 00:16:12,058 Sorry, Toadie. I know I said "we," but I got this. 387 00:16:12,058 --> 00:16:14,799 So back when we were in school-- 388 00:16:14,799 --> 00:16:16,279 TOAD-BUTTON: Was it not the early '90s? 389 00:16:16,279 --> 00:16:17,846 I feel like that helps. 390 00:16:17,846 --> 00:16:21,981 LEAD CONVICT: Yes, okay, back in the early '90s, 391 00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:24,374 we used to struggle as students, 392 00:16:24,374 --> 00:16:26,115 but Lewis saw our potential 393 00:16:26,115 --> 00:16:28,596 and was determined to get the most out of us. 394 00:16:28,596 --> 00:16:31,164 Aww, Jerry. Gimme a hug. 395 00:16:31,164 --> 00:16:33,209 I'm obviously not finished! 396 00:16:33,209 --> 00:16:35,211 LEAD CONVICT: But no matter how well we did, 397 00:16:35,211 --> 00:16:37,561 nothing was ever good enough for this guy. 398 00:16:37,561 --> 00:16:41,043 Eventually we couldn't take it anymore and snapped. 399 00:16:41,043 --> 00:16:43,872 We dropped out, started getting into trouble, 400 00:16:43,872 --> 00:16:45,439 and wound up in jail. 401 00:16:45,439 --> 00:16:47,006 [camera shutter clicks] 402 00:16:48,964 --> 00:16:50,748 All because of him. 403 00:16:50,748 --> 00:16:51,793 In the early '90s. 404 00:16:51,793 --> 00:16:52,881 [sighs] 405 00:16:52,881 --> 00:16:54,317 That's right, Steve. 406 00:16:54,317 --> 00:16:56,798 I used to try to get the most out of my students. 407 00:16:56,798 --> 00:16:58,321 I used to be... 408 00:16:58,321 --> 00:16:59,975 a bad principal. 409 00:16:59,975 --> 00:17:01,629 I...don't follow. 410 00:17:01,629 --> 00:17:03,022 You see, the problem was, 411 00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:05,067 I was acting like a strict parent, 412 00:17:05,067 --> 00:17:07,156 when all these kids already had parents. 413 00:17:07,156 --> 00:17:08,810 Actually I lost both my parents. 414 00:17:08,810 --> 00:17:10,290 It was just too much pressure. 415 00:17:10,290 --> 00:17:11,987 What they needed was a friend. 416 00:17:11,987 --> 00:17:14,816 It's not princi-parent. It's princi-pal. 417 00:17:14,816 --> 00:17:17,645 So I became the most fun pal I could be. 418 00:17:17,645 --> 00:17:19,473 And, yes, over the years that may have drifted 419 00:17:19,473 --> 00:17:21,127 into [bleep] up uncle territory, 420 00:17:21,127 --> 00:17:23,303 but the results speak for themselves-- 421 00:17:23,303 --> 00:17:25,131 The only time kids go to jail anymore 422 00:17:25,131 --> 00:17:26,828 is when they're there visiting me. 423 00:17:26,828 --> 00:17:28,090 Wow. 424 00:17:28,090 --> 00:17:30,440 So all this time I thought you were nuts... 425 00:17:30,440 --> 00:17:32,094 I was right. 426 00:17:32,094 --> 00:17:33,269 It was a car accident, 427 00:17:33,269 --> 00:17:35,489 in case anybody's interested. 428 00:17:35,489 --> 00:17:38,883 ♪ We were born to be ♪ 429 00:17:38,883 --> 00:17:39,971 ♪ Alive ♪ 430 00:17:39,971 --> 00:17:41,886 ♪ We were born to be ♪ 431 00:17:41,886 --> 00:17:43,627 ♪ Alive ♪ 432 00:17:43,627 --> 00:17:46,065 ♪ Born ♪ 433 00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:47,979 ♪ Born to be alive ♪ 434 00:17:47,979 --> 00:17:50,199 ♪ Born to be alive ♪ 435 00:17:50,199 --> 00:17:52,506 ♪ You see, we're born ♪ 436 00:17:52,506 --> 00:17:54,203 ♪ Born ♪ 437 00:17:54,203 --> 00:17:56,988 ♪ Born ♪ 438 00:17:56,988 --> 00:17:59,861 ♪ You see, we're born ♪ 439 00:17:59,861 --> 00:18:00,992 ♪ Born ♪ 440 00:18:00,992 --> 00:18:02,820 ♪ Born to be alive ♪ 441 00:18:02,820 --> 00:18:04,692 ♪ Born to be alive ♪ 442 00:18:05,562 --> 00:18:06,955 You know what's ironic? 443 00:18:06,955 --> 00:18:09,088 We were doing all this for the giraffe, 444 00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:12,221 but I think he showed us the night of our lives. 445 00:18:12,221 --> 00:18:13,266 - Mm-hmm. - Mm-hmm. 446 00:18:13,266 --> 00:18:15,181 [tires screeching] 447 00:18:18,401 --> 00:18:20,534 Whoa, a giraffe! 448 00:18:20,534 --> 00:18:22,492 Looks like y'all had a crazy night. 449 00:18:22,492 --> 00:18:25,713 Yeah, but I guess he has to go back to the zoo now. 450 00:18:25,713 --> 00:18:27,367 Wait. 451 00:18:27,367 --> 00:18:31,110 I might have an idea that'll keep him out of the zoo forever. 452 00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:32,285 Please! 453 00:18:32,285 --> 00:18:33,938 You gotta believe me! 454 00:18:33,938 --> 00:18:35,984 I'm not a baby giraffe! 455 00:18:35,984 --> 00:18:37,594 I'm a human man! 456 00:18:37,594 --> 00:18:41,642 Yeah, yeah, yeah, you and every other animal in this zoo. 457 00:18:42,904 --> 00:18:44,862 Don't worry, babe! We'll be back! 458 00:18:44,862 --> 00:18:46,777 I got an annual pass. 459 00:18:48,301 --> 00:18:50,433 Guys, if you wanna destroy the school, 460 00:18:50,433 --> 00:18:52,174 just leave this man in charge. 461 00:18:52,174 --> 00:18:54,872 He will eventually do it, I guarantee. 462 00:18:54,872 --> 00:18:56,831 And your hands'll be clean. 463 00:18:56,831 --> 00:18:58,311 Enough stalling. 464 00:18:58,311 --> 00:19:01,357 Any last requests before your school goes sky-high? 465 00:19:03,533 --> 00:19:07,015 How about we raise a final toast to old Pearl Bailey? 466 00:19:07,015 --> 00:19:08,843 With what beverage? 467 00:19:08,843 --> 00:19:11,498 With the champagne of colas, 468 00:19:11,498 --> 00:19:12,803 Diet Coke. 469 00:19:21,072 --> 00:19:23,640 He's trying to kill himself before we blow up the school. 470 00:19:23,640 --> 00:19:24,728 That's enough. 471 00:19:27,514 --> 00:19:28,863 PRINCIPAL LEWIS: Stop! 472 00:19:31,257 --> 00:19:34,129 [belches] 473 00:19:34,129 --> 00:19:35,652 - Ah, gross! - Ugh! 474 00:19:35,652 --> 00:19:37,306 This is just sad. 475 00:19:37,306 --> 00:19:39,613 Please blow up the school. We deserve it at this point. 476 00:19:39,613 --> 00:19:41,441 Sorry. I meant to do this. 477 00:19:43,486 --> 00:19:45,793 Um, is he flirting with me? 478 00:19:47,011 --> 00:19:48,535 [belches] 479 00:19:53,017 --> 00:19:54,367 - Oh! - Ooh! 480 00:19:58,327 --> 00:20:00,547 There is no way he meant to do that. 481 00:20:00,547 --> 00:20:03,550 [Principal Lewis laughing] 482 00:20:06,074 --> 00:20:09,208 He may not be perfect, but he really does care. 483 00:20:09,208 --> 00:20:11,514 I know his old students tried to blow up the school, 484 00:20:11,514 --> 00:20:13,864 but his current students just complain. 485 00:20:13,864 --> 00:20:16,040 I think he's moving in the right direction here. 486 00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:17,303 Thanks, Steve. 487 00:20:17,303 --> 00:20:19,696 I guess it's kind of like Steinbeck says-- 488 00:20:19,696 --> 00:20:23,091 "Now that I'm not asking you to be perfect, you can be good." 489 00:20:23,091 --> 00:20:25,180 See? He knows Steinbeck. 490 00:20:25,180 --> 00:20:27,313 Of course I know Sherm Steinbeck! 491 00:20:27,313 --> 00:20:29,445 You're not gonna find a better amateur dentist 492 00:20:29,445 --> 00:20:30,881 than that guy. 493 00:20:30,881 --> 00:20:33,449 All right, we'll let Mr. Lewis off with a warning. 494 00:20:33,449 --> 00:20:35,625 So what happened to those convicts anyway? 495 00:20:35,625 --> 00:20:37,236 Back to prison, I assume? 496 00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:39,194 Y'know, as their principal, 497 00:20:39,194 --> 00:20:41,065 I just didn't think more prison time 498 00:20:41,065 --> 00:20:43,067 was the answer for those kids. 499 00:20:45,548 --> 00:20:47,985 Here are the passports for your new identities. 500 00:20:47,985 --> 00:20:49,987 Hop in. I already picked up my other client, 501 00:20:49,987 --> 00:20:51,554 so next stop's Mexico. 502 00:20:52,381 --> 00:20:56,559 ♪ 503 00:20:56,559 --> 00:20:57,604 Bye! Have a beautiful time!