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♪ Good morning, USA! ♪
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♪ I got a feeling that it's
gonna be a wonderful day ♪
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♪ The sun in the sky
has a smile on his face ♪
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00:00:14,310 --> 00:00:18,430
♪ And he's shining a salute
to the American race ♪
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♪ Oh, boy, it's swell to say ♪
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♪ Good... ♪
♪ Good morning, USA ♪
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Aah!
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♪ Good morning, USA! ♪
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Sync and corrected by Mlmlte
www.addic7ed.com
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Nice use of letter E, Barry.
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00:00:37,099 --> 00:00:38,533
I like that.
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00:00:38,539 --> 00:00:40,173
Snot! Get your
head in the game!
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This is how we lose
men; good men!
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Sorry, Steve.
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00:00:43,411 --> 00:00:45,912
She's just so beautiful.
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Look at her.
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Are you digging for my heart
in there, tadpole?
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It's there.
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00:00:51,802 --> 00:00:53,987
That's where it resides.
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00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:55,655
Hey, you shouldn't be
worrying about girls
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00:00:55,723 --> 00:00:56,923
for another ten years.
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00:00:56,991 --> 00:00:58,258
You should be worrying
about blocks
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00:00:58,325 --> 00:00:59,793
and making pee-pee
on the potty.
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00:00:59,860 --> 00:01:01,528
Girls, this guy's
worried about!
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00:01:01,595 --> 00:01:03,229
You're right, Steve.
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00:01:03,297 --> 00:01:04,898
You're always right.
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00:01:04,965 --> 00:01:07,100
Interesting how we've developed
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00:01:07,168 --> 00:01:09,869
such a sophisticated
hierarchy at this young age.
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00:01:09,937 --> 00:01:10,937
Shut up, Barry.
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I'm at the bottom.
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Snot!
Focus!
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I can't take it anymore!
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He doesn't treat her right!
34
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Why isn't he grabbing her tush?
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00:01:26,420 --> 00:01:27,754
Give it a rest, Snot.
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00:01:27,822 --> 00:01:29,139
We have to focus on what to do
37
00:01:29,206 --> 00:01:31,641
for our sixth annual
Best Friends Excursion;
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Which some people
have misinterpreted
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since we printed
shirts that read:
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"Hardcore B.F.
Weekend."
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Now, as you know,
42
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every year we pool our leftover
baby-sitting and allowance money
43
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and use it to take a trip
together as best pals.
44
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And every year, I come up with
45
00:01:50,177 --> 00:01:51,544
something awesome for us to do.
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00:01:51,612 --> 00:01:53,930
Like the time we went
to Dennis Quaid's house.
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Do you boys have any water?
48
00:01:58,335 --> 00:02:01,621
Cause I got some pills
I'd like to get put in me.
49
00:02:01,689 --> 00:02:02,872
Get out of here, Randy!
50
00:02:02,957 --> 00:02:04,174
You get out of here now!
51
00:02:04,258 --> 00:02:05,375
Get!
52
00:02:08,646 --> 00:02:10,713
That was a great trip.
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Expired. Expired. Expired.
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Should we just have a baby?
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I guess.
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00:02:27,815 --> 00:02:30,683
I am here for the fair Hayley!
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Oh, God.
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Hayley, I love you!
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Oh, God.
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And I'm not leaving until
you say you love me back.
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00:02:40,544 --> 00:02:42,312
No. I don't love you, okay?
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I'm married. Sometimes happily.
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I thought you might say that.
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But wait till you hear this!
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Aha! I hired a
12-piece orchestra
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to play your favorite song,
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"Gangsta's Paradise" by Coolio.
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♪ ♪
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00:03:03,751 --> 00:03:05,985
Now what do you say?
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00:03:06,053 --> 00:03:07,186
No.
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00:03:07,254 --> 00:03:08,988
I thought you might say that.
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00:03:09,056 --> 00:03:12,258
But feast your eyes on this!
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Aha-ha!
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Elephant.
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Your favorite animal.
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I rented it for you.
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00:03:20,067 --> 00:03:21,901
Say you love me!
No.
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00:03:21,969 --> 00:03:24,604
I thought
you might say that.
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00:03:24,672 --> 00:03:28,608
But wait until you see
what's in the elephant's sack.
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Aha-ha!
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Batteries!
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Your favorite thing
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on your favorite animal!
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No.
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I thought you might say that.
86
00:03:38,686 --> 00:03:41,421
But wait until you see this!
87
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Aha-ha!
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00:03:49,647 --> 00:03:51,898
What do you say now, my love?
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00:03:51,966 --> 00:03:53,800
Go... away.
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00:04:12,636 --> 00:04:14,470
Snot, it's okay.
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00:04:14,538 --> 00:04:16,906
You tried, huh, big guy?
92
00:04:16,974 --> 00:04:19,208
No. It's not okay.
93
00:04:19,276 --> 00:04:22,562
It's never gonna be okay!
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If it makes you feel any better,
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00:04:26,133 --> 00:04:28,234
I'm pretty sure
she has the herps.
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00:04:28,302 --> 00:04:30,637
Yeah, she does.
97
00:04:33,307 --> 00:04:36,709
Sam, you didn't turn Larry Tate
into a horse did you?
98
00:04:36,777 --> 00:04:38,911
Well...
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00:04:42,850 --> 00:04:45,785
How great is Bewitched?
100
00:04:45,853 --> 00:04:48,054
I wish we lived in the '60s.
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Men wore suits and drank
martinis all day long.
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Francine, starting tomorrow,
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00:04:52,826 --> 00:04:54,727
I want you to greet me at
the door with a martini
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00:04:54,795 --> 00:04:55,795
when I get home from work.
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00:04:55,863 --> 00:04:58,464
Stan, martinis
are pretty strong,
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00:04:58,532 --> 00:05:00,633
and you're not much of a drinker.
What?!
107
00:05:00,701 --> 00:05:02,635
Just last week
at Sanders' barbecue,
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00:05:02,703 --> 00:05:05,938
I poured a whole amber lager
down my mighty throat
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00:05:06,006 --> 00:05:08,408
in just under two hours.
110
00:05:08,475 --> 00:05:11,377
All right. I guess
it does sound kind of fun.
111
00:05:11,445 --> 00:05:14,346
Oh! I Dream of Jeannie
is on next.
112
00:05:14,398 --> 00:05:15,932
Know what else sounds fun?
113
00:05:16,000 --> 00:05:18,101
You start wearing see-through
pants and living in a bottle.
114
00:05:18,168 --> 00:05:20,103
The CIA has a great shrink ray.
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00:05:20,170 --> 00:05:23,289
I'd carry tiny you around
and feed you grains of rice.
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Come on, do it.
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Snot, just pick up.
118
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I'm sorry Hayley rejected you,
but look at it this way:
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00:05:34,935 --> 00:05:36,869
Now that you've spent
all your bar mitzvah money
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00:05:36,937 --> 00:05:38,905
trying to get her, you don't
have to worry about your mom
121
00:05:38,972 --> 00:05:40,773
stealing it out of
your account anymore.
122
00:05:42,176 --> 00:05:44,177
I am stressing out, Steve!
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00:05:44,228 --> 00:05:45,595
My company just announced
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00:05:45,662 --> 00:05:47,597
they're no longer
matching our 401Ks.
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00:05:47,664 --> 00:05:49,732
My doctor gave me
a promotional stress ball,
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00:05:49,800 --> 00:05:51,918
as if fidgeting
with some dumb ball
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00:05:51,985 --> 00:05:53,920
will take the weight
of the world off my shoulders.
128
00:05:53,987 --> 00:05:55,071
Actually, it's helping a lot.
129
00:05:55,155 --> 00:05:56,555
Whatever, Roger.
130
00:05:56,607 --> 00:05:58,958
Snot just got his heart broken,
and I have to cheer him up.
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00:05:59,026 --> 00:06:02,245
Hey... actually,
maybe you could help!
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00:06:02,329 --> 00:06:05,048
You know, uh, put-put together
a teenage girl disguise.
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00:06:05,115 --> 00:06:08,367
Laugh at his jokes, smile,
twirl your hair a little.
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00:06:08,435 --> 00:06:09,802
Build his confidence.
135
00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:12,271
No, no. I can't just switch
personas like that.
136
00:06:12,339 --> 00:06:13,840
See, sometimes
certain characters
137
00:06:13,907 --> 00:06:15,408
just grab ahold of you,
138
00:06:15,476 --> 00:06:18,711
and, brother, they set up shop
in the depths of your soul.
139
00:06:18,779 --> 00:06:20,412
You get to go to Forever 21.
140
00:06:20,464 --> 00:06:23,199
Cigarette jeans!
141
00:06:31,959 --> 00:06:35,762
You gonna play that game
or just lean on it?
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00:06:35,829 --> 00:06:36,829
Name's Jenny.
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00:06:36,897 --> 00:06:38,397
Jenny Fr mdabloc.
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00:06:38,465 --> 00:06:40,533
I'm Steve's cousin
visiting from Jersey.
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00:06:40,601 --> 00:06:43,035
Yes! Y-Yes,
she is.
146
00:06:43,103 --> 00:06:44,287
I-I didn't mention
it because...
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00:06:44,371 --> 00:06:45,688
No one's doing the math.
148
00:06:45,756 --> 00:06:47,423
Your hair, it's curly.
149
00:06:47,491 --> 00:06:49,725
You should see it when
I wash it on Tuesdays.
150
00:06:49,793 --> 00:06:53,162
You're funny.
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00:06:53,230 --> 00:06:56,132
Come on, boys. Let's give
these two a little space.
152
00:06:57,701 --> 00:07:00,169
So... buy me
a soda pop?
153
00:07:00,237 --> 00:07:03,005
I've only got enough
money for one Coke.
154
00:07:03,073 --> 00:07:05,274
Oh, that's so sweet.
We'll share.
155
00:07:05,342 --> 00:07:07,376
Or I'll just have it.
156
00:07:10,047 --> 00:07:13,483
So, basically, we all eat seven
spiders a year in our sleep.
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00:07:15,219 --> 00:07:16,719
Snot? Are you okay?
158
00:07:16,787 --> 00:07:18,588
I almost didn't make it
to school.
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00:07:18,655 --> 00:07:20,456
Oh, no, Jenny.
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00:07:20,524 --> 00:07:21,591
What did she do?
161
00:07:21,658 --> 00:07:23,126
Oh, Steve!
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00:07:23,193 --> 00:07:25,995
We went to Taco King, and
then we rode the Ferris wheel,
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00:07:26,063 --> 00:07:29,098
then we went to the beach
and stayed up all night
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00:07:29,166 --> 00:07:31,234
talking about our hopes
and dreams.
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Then I (bleeped) her!
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I finally did it, man.
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I'm not a virgin anymore.
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You slut!
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00:07:57,557 --> 00:08:00,125
I have to say,
it was super relaxing
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00:08:00,193 --> 00:08:02,077
being an innocent young girl
for a change.
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00:08:02,145 --> 00:08:04,913
Innocent?! You did it
with Snot on the beach!
172
00:08:04,981 --> 00:08:06,064
Yeah, I did.
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00:08:06,132 --> 00:08:08,016
Got sand all up
in my Jenny dress,
174
00:08:08,101 --> 00:08:09,601
not to mention my gopher hole.
175
00:08:09,669 --> 00:08:11,103
Oop, I mentioned it.
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00:08:11,170 --> 00:08:14,172
You're an alien! How is that
even physically possible?!
177
00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:15,907
Well, you see, Steve,
just because I don't have
178
00:08:15,975 --> 00:08:18,009
your traditional
human genitalia...
179
00:08:18,077 --> 00:08:19,644
Nah... no!
My ears!
180
00:08:19,712 --> 00:08:21,646
I'm sorry I ever asked
you for this favor.
181
00:08:21,714 --> 00:08:23,165
I should've known
you'd take it too far.
182
00:08:23,249 --> 00:08:24,633
Yeah, you should've.
183
00:08:24,701 --> 00:08:26,902
You've known me for years,
Steve.
184
00:08:29,138 --> 00:08:31,823
So, you know, once you've
been intimate with a lady,
185
00:08:31,891 --> 00:08:33,191
you start to see it everywhere.
186
00:08:33,259 --> 00:08:36,078
Like in the sideways mouth
of a bearded man...
187
00:08:36,145 --> 00:08:37,846
Ohhh...
188
00:08:39,115 --> 00:08:42,050
Hey, guys, so I
had a few pitches
189
00:08:42,118 --> 00:08:43,752
for our annual friends excursion.
I was thinking...
190
00:08:45,254 --> 00:08:46,755
And boobies!
191
00:08:46,823 --> 00:08:49,658
You know how desk lamps have
those little nubs at the top?
192
00:08:50,827 --> 00:08:52,010
If you turn that,
193
00:08:52,061 --> 00:08:54,146
you can have more light
to see the boobies.
194
00:09:06,275 --> 00:09:07,426
Oh, Steve.
You're home.
195
00:09:07,493 --> 00:09:10,896
I made bologna roll-ups
for Snot and your...
196
00:09:10,963 --> 00:09:12,197
cousin?
Mm, cousin.
197
00:09:12,265 --> 00:09:13,498
Cousin.
198
00:09:14,667 --> 00:09:16,151
You can have these, Steve.
199
00:09:16,219 --> 00:09:17,919
We have roll-ups of our own.
200
00:09:19,122 --> 00:09:20,889
Mmm...
201
00:09:20,973 --> 00:09:22,073
Yuck!
202
00:09:22,141 --> 00:09:23,759
Oh, hello, Hayley.
203
00:09:23,826 --> 00:09:26,595
I'm here visiting
my girlfriend.
204
00:09:26,662 --> 00:09:28,797
Ew.
205
00:09:28,865 --> 00:09:30,198
She's jealous.
206
00:09:30,266 --> 00:09:33,385
You're so classy.
Mmm...
207
00:09:33,453 --> 00:09:35,854
Um, what is going on here,
Jenny?
208
00:09:35,922 --> 00:09:38,690
I'll tell you what's going
I like Snot.
209
00:09:38,758 --> 00:09:40,892
He's cute and he's funny
and he treats me nice.
210
00:09:40,960 --> 00:09:43,378
Reminds me of a
young Paul Reiser.
211
00:09:43,446 --> 00:09:45,730
He is nothing like
a young Paul Reiser.
212
00:09:45,798 --> 00:09:48,316
He's Rob Morrow,
on his best day.
213
00:09:48,384 --> 00:09:50,702
Listen, Jenny, I should
probably get home anyway.
214
00:09:50,753 --> 00:09:52,120
No... don't go.
215
00:09:52,188 --> 00:09:53,388
Mm... I don't
want to go.
216
00:09:53,456 --> 00:09:54,656
Then stay.
217
00:09:54,724 --> 00:09:56,541
I wish I could stay forever.
218
00:09:56,609 --> 00:09:58,827
Promise me you'll visit
my dreams tonight.
219
00:09:58,895 --> 00:10:00,195
Oh, come on!
220
00:10:02,414 --> 00:10:04,449
Honey, I'm home!
221
00:10:04,517 --> 00:10:06,084
Hi, dear.
222
00:10:06,152 --> 00:10:07,686
Martini?
Perfect.
223
00:10:07,753 --> 00:10:09,437
Just like Darrin and Sam.
224
00:10:09,522 --> 00:10:11,189
So elegant.
225
00:10:11,257 --> 00:10:12,858
Cheers... darling.
226
00:10:17,313 --> 00:10:19,681
Stan, get in the car!
227
00:10:19,749 --> 00:10:23,819
Hada baga! Hada ba-gaga!
228
00:10:23,903 --> 00:10:26,071
Clearly you can't
handle your gin!
229
00:10:26,122 --> 00:10:27,956
Now get in, damn it!
230
00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:28,940
Vault!
231
00:10:30,459 --> 00:10:32,661
You see that, Harold?
232
00:10:32,728 --> 00:10:36,198
That man tried to put his
package into that mailbox.
233
00:10:36,265 --> 00:10:40,001
Maybe he
thought it was a female box.
234
00:10:41,420 --> 00:10:44,055
A fe... a female box...
235
00:10:44,123 --> 00:10:45,340
Oy.
236
00:10:49,629 --> 00:10:53,231
It's been nine years
since Judy died.
237
00:10:58,571 --> 00:11:00,272
It's sort of weird, huh,
238
00:11:00,339 --> 00:11:01,873
hanging out at
your house, Snot?
239
00:11:01,941 --> 00:11:04,075
I mean, we-we usually
hang out at my place.
240
00:11:04,143 --> 00:11:07,245
Yeah. Stuff happens at other
people's houses, too, Steve.
241
00:11:07,313 --> 00:11:10,715
Don't go in there, huh?
242
00:11:10,783 --> 00:11:12,534
What are we watching?
243
00:11:14,820 --> 00:11:17,255
Well, Jenny, I think
you're watching us decide
244
00:11:17,323 --> 00:11:19,257
what we're gonna do for
our friends excursion.
245
00:11:19,325 --> 00:11:20,692
Okay, ready?
246
00:11:20,760 --> 00:11:24,095
You know how Baskin-Robbins
has 31 flavors?
247
00:11:24,163 --> 00:11:27,132
We try
every single flavor...
248
00:11:27,199 --> 00:11:30,135
In one day. Huh?
249
00:11:30,202 --> 00:11:31,603
Hmm...
250
00:11:31,671 --> 00:11:34,906
I was thinking we'd go
to Wild West Land.
251
00:11:34,974 --> 00:11:36,191
Yeah!
Yeah!
252
00:11:36,259 --> 00:11:39,227
And remember, boys,
there will be girls aplenty
253
00:11:39,295 --> 00:11:41,029
at Wild West Land.
254
00:11:41,097 --> 00:11:44,432
Take it from someone who's
getting sniz on the reg.
255
00:11:44,500 --> 00:11:47,369
Come on. 31 Flavors is
a much better idea
256
00:11:47,436 --> 00:11:49,004
than Wild West Land.
257
00:11:49,071 --> 00:11:51,239
Hey, whatcha thinkin'?
258
00:11:51,307 --> 00:11:54,175
I don't want to
tell in front of these guys.
259
00:11:54,243 --> 00:11:55,710
You want to tell me over there?
260
00:11:55,778 --> 00:11:56,778
Yeah.
261
00:11:56,846 --> 00:11:59,247
Okay, let's go.
Okay.
262
00:12:00,866 --> 00:12:03,702
Hey, what are we
supposed to do?
263
00:12:03,769 --> 00:12:04,736
Well, I guess we could...
264
00:12:04,804 --> 00:12:06,104
Not you, virgin!
265
00:12:13,679 --> 00:12:15,697
Do you know what time it is?
266
00:12:15,765 --> 00:12:17,616
Nope. We were having
sex in the park,
267
00:12:17,683 --> 00:12:18,833
and I totally lost track.
268
00:12:18,901 --> 00:12:20,702
I must have been
making weird noises
269
00:12:20,770 --> 00:12:22,971
'cause a bunch of cats
wouldn't leave us alone.
270
00:12:23,039 --> 00:12:25,073
Had to throw a couple cats.
271
00:12:25,141 --> 00:12:27,042
Roger, you have to stop this.
272
00:12:27,109 --> 00:12:28,009
I see.
273
00:12:28,036 --> 00:12:29,754
I know what's really
going on here.
274
00:12:29,821 --> 00:12:31,122
You can't stand the fact
275
00:12:31,189 --> 00:12:32,406
that Snot's cool now,
276
00:12:32,474 --> 00:12:34,558
and you're no longer
king of the nerds!
277
00:12:34,626 --> 00:12:36,560
That's ridiculous!
278
00:12:36,628 --> 00:12:39,680
I mean sure there's been
an established hierarchy, but...
279
00:12:39,748 --> 00:12:41,449
What...
wh-what is that?
280
00:12:41,516 --> 00:12:43,451
Oh, this?
My stress ball.
281
00:12:43,518 --> 00:12:44,685
But there's a crack in it.
282
00:12:44,753 --> 00:12:47,204
Uh-huh.
283
00:12:47,272 --> 00:12:50,040
Oh, my God, that's how
you and Snot have been...
284
00:12:50,108 --> 00:12:51,142
Relieving stress.
285
00:12:51,209 --> 00:12:52,777
Because this is a stress ball.
286
00:12:52,844 --> 00:12:54,545
And trust me,
Snot's been relieving
287
00:12:54,613 --> 00:12:57,181
a lot of stress into
this thing.
288
00:12:57,249 --> 00:12:58,516
Good night!
289
00:13:09,561 --> 00:13:12,413
They went to Wild West Land
without me?
290
00:13:12,481 --> 00:13:14,364
Hey, Steve, I'm just
telling a few people,
291
00:13:14,416 --> 00:13:16,717
I'm making belt buckles now
if you want to buy one.
292
00:13:16,785 --> 00:13:17,651
Check it out.
293
00:13:19,921 --> 00:13:22,356
He's got red eyes
from smoking weed.
294
00:13:22,424 --> 00:13:24,959
I really can't believe
you're an educator, Brian.
295
00:13:25,026 --> 00:13:27,344
My job's mostly administrative.
296
00:13:32,417 --> 00:13:33,834
Traitors!
297
00:13:33,902 --> 00:13:35,703
Last I checked,
friends excursions
298
00:13:35,771 --> 00:13:37,438
included all
of the friends.
299
00:13:37,506 --> 00:13:39,073
How could you come here
without me?
300
00:13:39,141 --> 00:13:40,641
Because you hate Jenny,
301
00:13:40,709 --> 00:13:43,711
and you're jealous that I'm
getting sniz on the reg.
302
00:13:43,779 --> 00:13:45,312
Stop saying that!
303
00:13:45,380 --> 00:13:47,214
Sorry, Steve.
Snot's cooler.
304
00:13:47,282 --> 00:13:48,983
Okay, okay.
305
00:13:49,050 --> 00:13:50,684
Hey, Snot, heads up.
306
00:13:50,752 --> 00:13:51,702
What's this?
307
00:13:51,770 --> 00:13:52,736
A stress ball.
308
00:13:52,804 --> 00:13:55,573
Feel familiar?
309
00:13:55,640 --> 00:13:58,776
This is what Jenny was using
to fake sex with you.
310
00:13:58,844 --> 00:14:00,211
What?!
311
00:14:00,278 --> 00:14:02,046
She didn't do it with you
for real.
312
00:14:02,113 --> 00:14:03,580
You're still a virgin!
313
00:14:03,632 --> 00:14:05,149
Ohhh...
314
00:14:06,985 --> 00:14:09,220
Jenny, how could you?
315
00:14:09,287 --> 00:14:11,772
I'm sorry!
316
00:14:11,840 --> 00:14:13,374
You made a fool out of me!
317
00:14:13,441 --> 00:14:16,426
I never want to see you again.
318
00:14:20,532 --> 00:14:24,802
I need this now more than ever
for its intended purpose!
319
00:14:24,870 --> 00:14:26,971
"Sons of Tucson,
new on Fox"?
320
00:14:27,038 --> 00:14:28,172
When was this on?
321
00:14:28,240 --> 00:14:29,606
I watch Fox;
I never saw this.
322
00:14:41,234 --> 00:14:42,435
Please.
323
00:14:42,460 --> 00:14:43,643
Fine! Just go.
324
00:14:43,711 --> 00:14:46,563
Just-just ruin
two lives and go!
325
00:14:46,630 --> 00:14:48,198
Roger, I didn't ruin your life.
326
00:14:48,265 --> 00:14:49,566
Jenny's not even real.
327
00:14:49,633 --> 00:14:51,735
But our love was!
328
00:14:51,802 --> 00:14:52,969
Snot loved Jenny
329
00:14:53,037 --> 00:14:54,504
and Jenny loved Snot.
330
00:14:54,572 --> 00:14:56,072
Ew.
331
00:15:00,511 --> 00:15:05,415
So, guys, let's hit
31 Flavors this weekend.
332
00:15:05,483 --> 00:15:07,033
What do you say, Snot?
333
00:15:07,101 --> 00:15:08,902
I'm thinking
of moving to Cheyenne
334
00:15:08,969 --> 00:15:10,970
to live with my uncle Pat.
335
00:15:11,055 --> 00:15:14,824
Look, I know you're upset,
but you had to know the truth.
336
00:15:14,892 --> 00:15:17,160
Trust me, it's best
for the group.
337
00:15:17,228 --> 00:15:19,229
You're right, Steve.
338
00:15:19,296 --> 00:15:20,563
You're always right.
339
00:15:24,568 --> 00:15:25,952
Again, just want to mention
340
00:15:26,020 --> 00:15:27,821
I'm selling belt
buckles I made.
341
00:15:27,888 --> 00:15:30,840
I also got a line
of retro ones.
342
00:15:33,627 --> 00:15:35,929
Yep, that was the time.
343
00:15:35,996 --> 00:15:38,031
That was the music of the time.
344
00:15:38,099 --> 00:15:39,866
The drug of the time?
345
00:15:39,934 --> 00:15:41,418
"Kyo-kyaine."
346
00:15:46,190 --> 00:15:48,525
Hey, where's my martini?
347
00:15:48,592 --> 00:15:49,993
You're not getting one.
348
00:15:50,060 --> 00:15:51,778
You can't handle your alcohol.
349
00:15:51,846 --> 00:15:53,346
Of course, I can.
350
00:15:53,414 --> 00:15:55,799
Yesterday I just had to
get the kinks worked out.
351
00:15:55,866 --> 00:15:57,133
Tonight I'm ready to live
352
00:15:57,201 --> 00:15:58,435
like a gentleman of the '60s.
353
00:15:58,502 --> 00:16:00,587
Now, martini me, sweetheart.
354
00:16:00,654 --> 00:16:04,073
I tell you I was
in the best shape of my life.
355
00:16:04,141 --> 00:16:06,509
I was closer to God
than I've ever been,
356
00:16:06,577 --> 00:16:09,429
and I was flush with cash.
357
00:16:09,497 --> 00:16:11,397
Stan, I really don't
want to talk
358
00:16:11,465 --> 00:16:12,732
about the fifth grade anymore.
359
00:16:12,800 --> 00:16:14,000
Fine.
360
00:16:17,822 --> 00:16:19,722
How, how did you...?
361
00:16:19,790 --> 00:16:21,374
How did you do that?
362
00:16:21,442 --> 00:16:23,276
Do what?
363
00:16:23,344 --> 00:16:25,779
You passed out, and I
went and got you water.
364
00:16:25,846 --> 00:16:26,996
I barely blinked!
365
00:16:27,064 --> 00:16:28,848
And things then all changed
366
00:16:28,916 --> 00:16:30,316
like on Bewitched.
367
00:16:35,189 --> 00:16:37,457
Where did you get that broom?
368
00:16:37,525 --> 00:16:41,027
Did you ride that broom
into the living room
369
00:16:41,095 --> 00:16:43,830
because you're a witch?!
370
00:16:54,525 --> 00:16:56,910
I'm married to a witch!
371
00:17:12,359 --> 00:17:16,112
It's time you knew the truth.
372
00:17:19,717 --> 00:17:22,752
Your father won't be
joining us for dinner.
373
00:17:22,820 --> 00:17:25,688
I'm sorry our horse-for-two
costume freaked him out, Mrs. S.
374
00:17:25,756 --> 00:17:28,157
Just bad timing, Jeff.
375
00:17:28,225 --> 00:17:29,325
It's a sex thing.
376
00:17:29,393 --> 00:17:30,810
I know, Jeff.
377
00:17:35,749 --> 00:17:36,950
Hey, Roger.
378
00:17:38,085 --> 00:17:40,854
Snot made me this.
379
00:17:40,921 --> 00:17:43,456
He made it out
of his Spanish worksheet.
380
00:17:45,659 --> 00:17:47,377
You really liked
him, didn't you?
381
00:17:47,444 --> 00:17:48,611
I did, I did.
382
00:17:48,662 --> 00:17:49,879
He was just really sweet.
383
00:17:49,947 --> 00:17:51,247
Roger, I'm sorry.
384
00:17:51,315 --> 00:17:53,833
I guess I did want
to be king of the nerds.
385
00:17:53,901 --> 00:17:56,569
But I'd rather have Snot happy
than be king of anything.
386
00:17:56,637 --> 00:17:58,571
I want Snot happy, too, Steve.
387
00:17:58,639 --> 00:18:00,106
But it's too late now.
388
00:18:00,174 --> 00:18:01,457
Snot won't take me back
389
00:18:01,525 --> 00:18:03,760
after you revealed Jenny
was faking it with him.
390
00:18:03,827 --> 00:18:06,279
True, but I think
I just found a way
391
00:18:06,347 --> 00:18:08,481
for you to make him feel
like a man again.
392
00:18:08,549 --> 00:18:11,985
Ooh, how about you fill me in
over a couple of beers?
393
00:18:12,052 --> 00:18:13,319
Great, right?
394
00:18:13,387 --> 00:18:16,055
I had two party balls
implanted in my chest.
395
00:18:16,123 --> 00:18:17,557
One light beer, one regular.
396
00:18:17,625 --> 00:18:18,658
Comin' at ya!
397
00:18:18,742 --> 00:18:20,643
Ahh! Stop it!
398
00:18:21,912 --> 00:18:22,829
Squirt.
No!
399
00:18:22,913 --> 00:18:24,280
Hey, stop it!
Squirt.
400
00:18:24,331 --> 00:18:25,615
Quit it!
Squirt, squirt.
401
00:18:25,666 --> 00:18:27,300
Aah! Squirt, squirt. Quit it!
402
00:18:33,340 --> 00:18:35,108
It's no good, Steve.
403
00:18:35,175 --> 00:18:37,277
Nothing's gonna cheer me up.
404
00:18:37,344 --> 00:18:40,146
You gonna use that street
lamp or just lean on it?
405
00:18:40,214 --> 00:18:41,664
You!
406
00:18:41,732 --> 00:18:43,132
Snot, please hear me out.
407
00:18:43,200 --> 00:18:45,285
Yes, I tricked you
with a stress ball,
408
00:18:45,352 --> 00:18:47,270
and it was a rotten
thing to do.
409
00:18:47,338 --> 00:18:48,938
Extra rotten, if you ask me!
410
00:18:49,006 --> 00:18:50,173
I know.
411
00:18:50,240 --> 00:18:52,058
But I did it because
I was saving myself
412
00:18:52,126 --> 00:18:53,359
for someone I loved.
413
00:18:53,444 --> 00:18:56,029
And I've realized that
that someone is you.
414
00:18:56,096 --> 00:18:58,731
I want to do it
for real tonight.
415
00:18:58,799 --> 00:18:59,766
What do you say?
416
00:18:59,833 --> 00:19:01,601
Make love to me again?
417
00:19:01,669 --> 00:19:04,037
For the first time?
418
00:19:10,277 --> 00:19:11,945
Come here, you!
419
00:19:14,665 --> 00:19:17,116
Wow, Snot, you're the man again.
420
00:19:17,184 --> 00:19:20,253
Until tonight, my love.
421
00:19:23,574 --> 00:19:25,308
Noooo...!
422
00:19:29,380 --> 00:19:31,981
She loved you, man.
423
00:19:32,049 --> 00:19:34,867
She loved you and you were
about to have sex with her.
424
00:19:34,935 --> 00:19:36,853
That's closer than any of us
have ever gotten.
425
00:19:36,920 --> 00:19:38,988
Yeah.
426
00:19:39,056 --> 00:19:41,124
Yeah, it is, isn't it?
427
00:19:41,191 --> 00:19:43,876
So, Steve, what
should we do now?
428
00:19:43,944 --> 00:19:47,180
What do you feel
like doing, big guy?
429
00:19:49,316 --> 00:19:51,284
Maybe we should go
to 31 Flavors.
430
00:19:51,352 --> 00:19:53,953
That sounds great.
431
00:19:54,021 --> 00:19:55,855
You know, things aren't so bad.
432
00:19:55,923 --> 00:19:57,957
I've got good friends,
and I realized
433
00:19:58,025 --> 00:20:01,044
I can get over the death of a
girlfriend really quickly.
434
00:20:03,998 --> 00:20:05,331
What are you doing here?
435
00:20:05,399 --> 00:20:07,000
Come to pay respects
436
00:20:07,067 --> 00:20:08,801
to one of my best
characters ever.
437
00:20:08,869 --> 00:20:10,203
How'd you fake
her death, anyway?
438
00:20:10,270 --> 00:20:11,337
Oh, that was easy.
439
00:20:14,158 --> 00:20:15,641
Until tonight, my love.
440
00:20:17,311 --> 00:20:19,395
I can move really, really fast.
441
00:20:53,213 --> 00:20:55,281
Noooo...!
442
00:20:56,483 --> 00:20:58,251
You sure can.
443
00:20:58,318 --> 00:20:59,285
I can.
444
00:20:59,353 --> 00:21:01,554
My underwear!
445
00:21:01,622 --> 00:21:03,256
Can I have those back?
446
00:21:03,323 --> 00:21:05,992
No. I already sold them
to that guy.
447
00:21:31,164 --> 00:21:34,664
Sync and corrected by Mlmlte
www.addic7ed.com