1 00:00:04,633 --> 00:00:07,301 ♪ Good morning, USA! 2 00:00:07,335 --> 00:00:11,238 ♪ I got a feeling that it's gonna be a wonderful day ♪ 3 00:00:11,272 --> 00:00:14,191 ♪ The sun in the sky has a smile on his face ♪ 4 00:00:14,225 --> 00:00:18,629 ♪ And he's shining a salute to the American race ♪ 5 00:00:20,498 --> 00:00:23,917 ♪ Oh, boy, it's swell to say 6 00:00:23,951 --> 00:00:25,919 ♪ Good... ♪ Good morning, USA 7 00:00:25,953 --> 00:00:27,454 Aah! 8 00:00:28,757 --> 00:00:30,297 ♪ Good morning, USA! 9 00:00:30,811 --> 00:00:38,400 Sync & corrections by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com 10 00:00:38,850 --> 00:00:41,143 Damn. Why can I never get straight lines? 11 00:00:41,263 --> 00:00:42,636 Ralph Fiennes?! 12 00:00:42,654 --> 00:00:45,939 Ralph Fiennes is here?! 13 00:00:45,974 --> 00:00:47,541 No, I said "straight lines." 14 00:00:47,575 --> 00:00:48,859 I can never get them. 15 00:00:52,864 --> 00:00:55,916 Stan, I've got some terrible news. 16 00:00:55,950 --> 00:00:56,950 For you or for me? 17 00:00:56,984 --> 00:00:58,602 For you. Damn. 18 00:00:58,636 --> 00:00:59,953 Your mom called. 19 00:00:59,988 --> 00:01:01,672 Hercules died. 20 00:01:01,706 --> 00:01:03,757 Oh. Big whoop, he's just my step dad. 21 00:01:03,792 --> 00:01:05,759 I barely care about my real dad. 22 00:01:05,794 --> 00:01:08,979 The only dad that's ever been kind to me is Father Time. 23 00:01:09,013 --> 00:01:11,465 He's been most kind. 24 00:01:11,499 --> 00:01:14,635 Quick, take a picture before I blow out my rectum! 25 00:01:14,669 --> 00:01:16,186 Aah, too late! 26 00:01:21,092 --> 00:01:22,893 What are they putting him in? 27 00:01:22,927 --> 00:01:26,296 Oh, Hercules always wanted to be buried in a Spani-coffina. 28 00:01:26,331 --> 00:01:28,499 Oh, that's so jokey. 29 00:01:28,533 --> 00:01:31,802 The eulogy will now be given by John Stamos, 30 00:01:31,836 --> 00:01:35,489 as famous fictional Greek character, Jesse Katsopolis. 31 00:01:35,523 --> 00:01:37,791 Have mercy... 32 00:01:37,826 --> 00:01:40,210 on this great Greek of a man we lost today. 33 00:01:43,448 --> 00:01:45,482 Now, please join me in the banquet hall 34 00:01:45,517 --> 00:01:47,484 for the Greek tradition of stealing everything 35 00:01:47,519 --> 00:01:48,869 that's not tied down. 36 00:01:54,125 --> 00:01:56,493 Betty, that service was straight baller. 37 00:01:56,528 --> 00:01:58,429 It must've cost a fortune. 38 00:01:58,463 --> 00:01:59,897 All of our savings. 39 00:01:59,931 --> 00:02:01,231 Wait, you're out of money? 40 00:02:01,266 --> 00:02:03,000 Well, then you'll have to move in with us. 41 00:02:03,034 --> 00:02:05,502 Oh, I wouldn't want to intrude. 42 00:02:05,537 --> 00:02:08,872 Besides, I should be independent and on my own. 43 00:02:08,907 --> 00:02:10,874 That's ridiculous. You're so old. 44 00:02:10,909 --> 00:02:12,309 Look how old you are. 45 00:02:12,343 --> 00:02:14,778 See? 46 00:02:14,813 --> 00:02:17,080 So old. 47 00:02:19,617 --> 00:02:21,418 Namaste, Lauren. 48 00:02:21,453 --> 00:02:23,086 Very good, Kim. 49 00:02:23,121 --> 00:02:25,622 Shawn Ian, I'm just going to adjust your arm 50 00:02:25,657 --> 00:02:27,958 to the right a bit-- how does that feel? 51 00:02:27,992 --> 00:02:29,309 Good? Good. 52 00:02:29,344 --> 00:02:32,279 Okay, now I'm just going to put my thumb in your mouth. 53 00:02:32,313 --> 00:02:33,380 How does that feel? 54 00:02:33,414 --> 00:02:34,565 Good? Good. 55 00:02:34,599 --> 00:02:37,167 Shut it down, pack it up. 56 00:02:37,202 --> 00:02:38,702 What? 57 00:02:38,736 --> 00:02:40,704 Pack up your crap; you're moving to the basement. 58 00:02:40,738 --> 00:02:42,756 My mom's gonna live up here from now on. 59 00:02:42,791 --> 00:02:44,441 But, Stan, this is my attic. 60 00:02:44,476 --> 00:02:46,443 This is my home. You can't do this. 61 00:02:46,478 --> 00:02:48,078 Sorry, bro. Mom's family. 62 00:02:48,112 --> 00:02:50,581 But I'm family, too! You just called me bro! 63 00:02:50,615 --> 00:02:52,583 Sorry, cuz, I was just using it as slang. 64 00:02:52,617 --> 00:02:54,468 Let me break it down for you, son: 65 00:02:54,502 --> 00:02:57,604 Family is your siblings, your kids, or most importantly, 66 00:02:57,639 --> 00:02:59,506 people you have physically been inside, 67 00:02:59,541 --> 00:03:01,575 either sexually or as a fetus. 68 00:03:10,618 --> 00:03:14,154 You know, this might be the seventh best bike ride 69 00:03:14,189 --> 00:03:15,489 we've ever taken. 70 00:03:15,523 --> 00:03:16,824 Keep dreaming, Steve. 71 00:03:16,858 --> 00:03:18,592 It's barely top nine. 72 00:03:18,626 --> 00:03:19,593 Guys! 73 00:03:19,627 --> 00:03:22,529 Oh, my God, a downed plane! 74 00:03:22,564 --> 00:03:26,934 We've got to keep it wet until the tide comes back in! 75 00:03:34,492 --> 00:03:36,126 I wonder what happened. 76 00:03:39,898 --> 00:03:42,366 Well, fellas, I think it's quite clear what happened. 77 00:03:42,400 --> 00:03:46,870 The pilot's head exploded while he was being read this! 78 00:03:46,905 --> 00:03:49,873 The script for The Fast and the Furious 7! 79 00:03:49,924 --> 00:03:52,309 No way! Look, it's signed 80 00:03:52,343 --> 00:03:54,094 by Randy Scott Knobson, 81 00:03:54,128 --> 00:03:56,697 the guy who wrote all the Fast and Furious movies. 82 00:03:56,731 --> 00:04:00,534 Steve, this just became the best bike ride 83 00:04:00,568 --> 00:04:04,838 we've had where we didn't see homeless people having sex. 84 00:04:04,873 --> 00:04:07,207 So, number six? 85 00:04:07,242 --> 00:04:08,542 Yeah. 86 00:04:11,029 --> 00:04:13,797 Stan, I'm able to live on my own. 87 00:04:13,831 --> 00:04:15,532 This is all so unnecessary. 88 00:04:15,567 --> 00:04:18,101 No, Mom, the Golden Globes are unnecessary. 89 00:04:18,136 --> 00:04:20,437 Chelsea Handler's career is unnecessary. 90 00:04:20,471 --> 00:04:22,573 Tucson, Arizona, unnecessary. 91 00:04:22,607 --> 00:04:26,410 Congratulations Tucson, you've been Dadded! 92 00:04:26,444 --> 00:04:28,245 Nobody's safe! 93 00:04:29,847 --> 00:04:31,481 Who's that? 94 00:04:31,516 --> 00:04:32,833 Oh, don't worry about him. 95 00:04:32,867 --> 00:04:35,168 That's just a nobody who lives in the basement. 96 00:04:35,203 --> 00:04:36,536 A nobody?! 97 00:04:37,572 --> 00:04:38,805 Who farted? 98 00:04:38,840 --> 00:04:41,174 Nobody! 99 00:04:41,209 --> 00:04:43,126 Well, I gotta go. 100 00:04:43,161 --> 00:04:44,411 Gotta get to work. 101 00:04:44,445 --> 00:04:45,562 See you tonight. 102 00:04:45,597 --> 00:04:47,164 What are we doing? This is crazy. 103 00:04:52,604 --> 00:04:55,272 "Exterior. 104 00:04:55,323 --> 00:04:56,573 "The streets. 105 00:04:56,608 --> 00:04:57,741 "Night. 106 00:04:57,775 --> 00:04:59,359 "There's not a soul around... 107 00:04:59,393 --> 00:05:02,813 "until the sickest Toyota you've ever seen slowly pulls up. 108 00:05:02,847 --> 00:05:06,249 "Brian O'Connor stares out into the dark night. 109 00:05:06,284 --> 00:05:11,588 "The only thing darker: the sick black tank top he's wearing. 110 00:05:13,558 --> 00:05:16,760 Suddenly, he pulls a gun out from under his seat..." 111 00:05:46,441 --> 00:05:48,775 Yo, Brian, I've been looking for you. 112 00:05:48,810 --> 00:05:51,128 Heist? Heist. 113 00:05:55,166 --> 00:06:00,504 Oh... my... God. 114 00:06:00,538 --> 00:06:02,773 We gotta get this script to Hollywood. 115 00:06:02,807 --> 00:06:04,775 The world needs to see this movie. 116 00:06:04,809 --> 00:06:06,927 But first we gotta finish reading it. 117 00:06:08,296 --> 00:06:09,496 "Interior. 118 00:06:09,530 --> 00:06:11,231 "Crazy awesome mansion. 119 00:06:11,265 --> 00:06:15,068 "A ridiculously hot girl feeds caviar to a Russian bad guy. 120 00:06:15,103 --> 00:06:17,671 There's like a bear or something chained up by the pool." 121 00:06:17,705 --> 00:06:20,440 Whoa! 122 00:06:22,860 --> 00:06:24,344 Jeff? 123 00:06:24,379 --> 00:06:26,279 What the hell are you doing? 124 00:06:26,314 --> 00:06:27,597 Oh, hey, Mr. S. 125 00:06:27,632 --> 00:06:30,600 Tom said if I helped him move his stuff back in the attic, 126 00:06:30,635 --> 00:06:32,903 he'd let me take him to the airport one day. 127 00:06:32,937 --> 00:06:34,621 Roger! 128 00:06:34,655 --> 00:06:38,458 I thought I told you to move down to the basement. 129 00:06:38,493 --> 00:06:40,794 Oh, yeah, right, because I wasn't family. 130 00:06:40,828 --> 00:06:43,146 Oh...Did you tell him yet? Tell me what? 131 00:06:43,181 --> 00:06:46,950 Me and Tom Yabo got married! 132 00:06:46,984 --> 00:06:48,618 That's right, Stan. 133 00:06:48,653 --> 00:06:49,886 I'm your new stepdad! 134 00:06:51,923 --> 00:06:55,005 FYI, Stan, the ceremony was beautiful. 135 00:06:55,125 --> 00:06:56,776 I sang an original song. 136 00:06:56,896 --> 00:06:59,029 People hated it. 137 00:07:03,670 --> 00:07:04,820 Mom, tell me this is a joke. 138 00:07:04,854 --> 00:07:06,287 There's no way you married this guy! 139 00:07:06,305 --> 00:07:07,922 She did. Now, we're registered at 140 00:07:07,957 --> 00:07:10,291 Crate and Barrel, but if you'd rather make something, 141 00:07:10,326 --> 00:07:12,343 that would be a lot more special. 142 00:07:12,378 --> 00:07:14,090 But... I-I don't... 143 00:07:14,210 --> 00:07:16,313 Oh, you want to know how we met? Sit, sit. 144 00:07:16,348 --> 00:07:20,184 After all this time, I never get tired of telling our story. 145 00:07:20,218 --> 00:07:22,186 At first we barely even got along. 146 00:07:22,220 --> 00:07:25,189 But then we realized we had a ton in common. 147 00:07:25,223 --> 00:07:26,724 Like telling this story. 148 00:07:26,758 --> 00:07:28,325 We both apparently love telling this story. 149 00:07:28,360 --> 00:07:31,595 I thought I was just gonna do it on my own, but, oh well. 150 00:07:31,630 --> 00:07:33,831 In addition to both of us loving tea, 151 00:07:33,865 --> 00:07:36,550 it turns out Betty and I are also both huge fans 152 00:07:36,585 --> 00:07:38,602 of laughing while drinking tea. 153 00:07:40,856 --> 00:07:42,490 Tom eventually invited me 154 00:07:42,524 --> 00:07:44,625 to take a beginner's yoga class. 155 00:07:44,659 --> 00:07:50,664 We connected on a physical, emotional, and spiritual level. 156 00:07:54,035 --> 00:07:57,521 I haven't been this happy since I was with Hercules. 157 00:07:57,556 --> 00:07:59,023 That was three days ago! 158 00:07:59,057 --> 00:08:02,143 Betty, can you give me a hand with the champagne? 159 00:08:02,177 --> 00:08:03,944 I'll miss you! 160 00:08:03,979 --> 00:08:05,463 I'll miss you more! 161 00:08:05,497 --> 00:08:06,747 Not possible. 162 00:08:06,782 --> 00:08:10,034 You married my mother just to get your attic back! 163 00:08:10,068 --> 00:08:12,085 Why on Earth would I want my attic back if it meant having 164 00:08:12,104 --> 00:08:14,505 to share it with some old lady I didn't even love? 165 00:08:14,539 --> 00:08:16,190 I'm sorry you don't trust me, 166 00:08:16,224 --> 00:08:17,975 but what your mother and I have is real. 167 00:08:18,009 --> 00:08:19,577 To true love. 168 00:08:19,611 --> 00:08:21,378 To happy endings. 169 00:08:21,413 --> 00:08:23,647 Oh, you, I know what that means. 170 00:08:23,682 --> 00:08:24,782 Prove it. 171 00:08:24,816 --> 00:08:26,450 Mom, I've known this guy for years. 172 00:08:26,485 --> 00:08:27,685 He's a manipulative sociopath. 173 00:08:27,719 --> 00:08:28,686 Stan! 174 00:08:28,720 --> 00:08:30,204 It's okay, Betts. 175 00:08:30,238 --> 00:08:32,957 Big family changes are often hardest on the children. 176 00:08:32,991 --> 00:08:34,742 Let's just take it step by step. 177 00:08:34,776 --> 00:08:36,577 You know, Stan, Betty and I would love 178 00:08:36,611 --> 00:08:38,579 to have you and Francine over for dinner tonight. 179 00:08:38,613 --> 00:08:40,114 Well, you can just forget-- 180 00:08:40,148 --> 00:08:41,916 That sounds wonderful, Tom. 181 00:08:41,950 --> 00:08:45,553 Stan, I think this actually might be good for your mom. 182 00:08:51,243 --> 00:08:52,576 Ugh! 183 00:08:56,665 --> 00:08:59,099 "Dom and Brian drive sick convertibles 184 00:08:59,134 --> 00:09:02,470 "and shoot awesome guns at these crazy Japanese dudes. 185 00:09:02,504 --> 00:09:03,737 "Brian takes a hard left, 186 00:09:03,772 --> 00:09:05,406 "sending him flying up a ramp. 187 00:09:05,440 --> 00:09:07,641 "In slo-mo, Dom looks up 188 00:09:07,659 --> 00:09:10,310 "as Brian's upside-down car sails over his own. 189 00:09:10,328 --> 00:09:12,312 "It's super sick. 190 00:09:12,330 --> 00:09:14,147 "Brian looks back down at Dom, 191 00:09:14,166 --> 00:09:15,916 "their heads inches from each other. 192 00:09:15,951 --> 00:09:18,752 "They crane their necks to steal an upside-down kiss, 193 00:09:18,787 --> 00:09:22,540 and Dom's tongue explores Brian's mouth." 194 00:09:22,574 --> 00:09:24,842 What the?! 195 00:09:24,876 --> 00:09:26,844 Are you sure you read that right? 196 00:09:26,878 --> 00:09:28,812 Maybe it's a typo. 197 00:09:28,847 --> 00:09:30,514 I'll just flip ahead.. 198 00:09:30,549 --> 00:09:33,584 Here we go: "Interior, garage, night. 199 00:09:33,618 --> 00:09:36,153 "Dom stands behind a bent-over Brian, 200 00:09:36,188 --> 00:09:39,190 "and Tokyo drifts into his..." 201 00:09:39,224 --> 00:09:42,610 Oh, that, okay, that scene goes on for like ten more pages. 202 00:09:42,644 --> 00:09:44,495 Dudes, this script is full of 203 00:09:44,529 --> 00:09:46,263 extremely graphic gay sex scenes. 204 00:09:46,298 --> 00:09:47,665 What do you expect? 205 00:09:47,699 --> 00:09:49,867 The whole lifestyle's fast and furious, 206 00:09:49,901 --> 00:09:53,470 with the pills and the disco and the tank tops-- ohh. 207 00:09:53,505 --> 00:09:55,139 Everything's changing. 208 00:09:57,642 --> 00:10:01,946 Oh, honey, it means so much to me that you came. 209 00:10:11,406 --> 00:10:15,009 Tom likes to say grace before eating. 210 00:10:17,245 --> 00:10:19,747 God, are you there? 211 00:10:19,781 --> 00:10:21,482 It's me, Tom Yabo. 212 00:10:21,516 --> 00:10:23,317 I just want to say thank you 213 00:10:23,351 --> 00:10:25,519 for sending me such an amazing woman 214 00:10:25,554 --> 00:10:27,655 and unbelievably generous lover. 215 00:10:27,689 --> 00:10:30,891 I mean her giving to receiving ratio is like three to one. 216 00:10:30,926 --> 00:10:31,892 Minimum. 217 00:10:31,927 --> 00:10:33,127 Amen. 218 00:10:33,161 --> 00:10:34,795 So, Stan, how was work today? 219 00:10:34,829 --> 00:10:36,497 Fine. 220 00:10:36,531 --> 00:10:40,501 Stan, you speak up and look at Tom when he asks you a question. 221 00:10:40,535 --> 00:10:41,969 It was fine! Okay?! 222 00:10:42,003 --> 00:10:43,637 Stan! 223 00:10:43,672 --> 00:10:45,639 Tom worked really hard on this meal. 224 00:10:45,674 --> 00:10:47,541 Well, it's gross, and I don't like it. 225 00:10:47,576 --> 00:10:49,059 Come on, champ, give it another try. 226 00:10:49,094 --> 00:10:51,278 Shut up! You're not my dad! 227 00:10:53,081 --> 00:10:54,415 Stan! 228 00:11:02,073 --> 00:11:03,874 Damn mower! 229 00:11:03,908 --> 00:11:05,726 By the size of those pit stains, 230 00:11:05,760 --> 00:11:09,229 I'd say it's half-past Miller time. 231 00:11:09,264 --> 00:11:10,648 Your mow-stripes are a little curved, huh? 232 00:11:10,682 --> 00:11:12,016 May I? 233 00:11:12,050 --> 00:11:13,284 Free country. 234 00:11:13,318 --> 00:11:14,818 Mm-hmm... Okay, 235 00:11:14,853 --> 00:11:16,320 I see what's going on here. 236 00:11:16,354 --> 00:11:17,855 You got the left rear wheel 237 00:11:17,889 --> 00:11:18,956 elevated at a six, 238 00:11:18,990 --> 00:11:20,691 but the right is only at a four. 239 00:11:20,725 --> 00:11:21,892 Not your fault, 240 00:11:21,926 --> 00:11:23,761 sometimes they come off the line like this. 241 00:11:23,795 --> 00:11:25,396 All right, that should do the trick. 242 00:11:25,430 --> 00:11:27,364 I'll leave you to your lawn. 243 00:11:40,912 --> 00:11:43,397 Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle. 244 00:11:45,033 --> 00:11:46,066 No. Stop. 245 00:11:46,101 --> 00:11:47,267 Listen, little monkey. 246 00:11:47,302 --> 00:11:48,636 This is hard to explain, 247 00:11:48,670 --> 00:11:50,871 but sometimes grown-ups use expressions 248 00:11:50,905 --> 00:11:52,790 that they don't really mean. 249 00:11:56,828 --> 00:11:59,296 I know. I was there. 250 00:11:59,331 --> 00:12:01,131 I was driving the other car. 251 00:12:05,603 --> 00:12:08,439 So we're all in agreement that this Fast and Furious could be 252 00:12:08,473 --> 00:12:10,908 the most action-packed one yet, right? 253 00:12:10,942 --> 00:12:14,712 But Steven, it'll never get made with all the hardcore gay sex. 254 00:12:14,746 --> 00:12:16,980 That's why we're gonna cut those scenes out 255 00:12:17,015 --> 00:12:19,183 and deliver the clean script to Hollywood. 256 00:12:19,217 --> 00:12:21,051 Then this movie will definitely get made. 257 00:12:21,086 --> 00:12:22,086 Let's do it! 258 00:12:22,120 --> 00:12:23,087 Yeah! 259 00:12:23,121 --> 00:12:24,788 I like it how it is now! 260 00:12:24,823 --> 00:12:25,923 Okay, here we go. 261 00:12:25,957 --> 00:12:29,493 Pull out all the pages that need to be cut. 262 00:12:29,527 --> 00:12:33,163 Um, what about this scene where Dom and Brian hold hands 263 00:12:33,198 --> 00:12:35,466 as they enter the Toyota Service Center? 264 00:12:35,500 --> 00:12:37,267 No, I think that's okay. 265 00:12:37,302 --> 00:12:38,602 We do that. 266 00:12:38,636 --> 00:12:40,571 We're actually holding hands right now. 267 00:12:40,605 --> 00:12:41,939 Oh, yeah. 268 00:12:41,973 --> 00:12:44,241 What about the scene where Paul Walker can't see, 269 00:12:44,275 --> 00:12:47,244 so Vin Diesel sits in his lap and shifts for him? 270 00:12:47,278 --> 00:12:49,413 That's just teamwork. 271 00:12:49,447 --> 00:12:50,981 Okay look, how about this? 272 00:12:51,015 --> 00:12:54,651 If both guys keep their pants on, it stays in, okay? 273 00:12:54,686 --> 00:12:56,353 Good work, gents. 274 00:12:56,388 --> 00:12:58,288 We were able to keep eight pages. 275 00:12:58,323 --> 00:13:00,190 Now let's take this baby to Hollywood! 276 00:13:03,762 --> 00:13:06,063 Whoa, no way! Cool car! 277 00:13:06,097 --> 00:13:08,866 It's a 1970 Dodge Challenger. 278 00:13:08,900 --> 00:13:10,317 Socket wrench me, would ya? 279 00:13:12,220 --> 00:13:16,223 Um... my, uh, my dad never taught me about tools. 280 00:13:16,257 --> 00:13:17,975 I could teach you... 281 00:13:18,009 --> 00:13:19,476 if you'd let me. 282 00:13:21,029 --> 00:13:23,447 I'll teach you how to do that, too. 283 00:13:52,043 --> 00:13:53,527 Here we go. 284 00:13:56,898 --> 00:13:59,316 It started, you did it! 285 00:13:59,367 --> 00:14:01,068 No, we did it. 286 00:14:09,110 --> 00:14:11,211 I hate to interrupt my boys getting along so well, 287 00:14:11,246 --> 00:14:13,614 but Tom, we really should hit the road. 288 00:14:16,968 --> 00:14:18,785 Whoa! We almost died. 289 00:14:18,803 --> 00:14:20,237 Where are you guys going? 290 00:14:20,271 --> 00:14:23,841 Mr. Yabo is taking me to Niagara Falls 291 00:14:23,875 --> 00:14:25,809 for our honeymoon. 292 00:14:25,844 --> 00:14:29,513 Mr. Yabo is taking me to Niagara Falls 293 00:14:29,547 --> 00:14:30,614 for our honeymoon." 294 00:14:30,648 --> 00:14:33,283 Seriously, that's how you sound. 295 00:14:35,153 --> 00:14:36,403 Niagara Falls, huh? 296 00:14:36,437 --> 00:14:37,504 That sounds fun. 297 00:14:37,539 --> 00:14:39,039 Are you guys taking the Dodge? 298 00:14:39,073 --> 00:14:41,475 Why would I do that, Stan? This isn't my car. 299 00:14:42,777 --> 00:14:44,645 It's yours. 300 00:14:44,679 --> 00:14:45,712 What?! 301 00:14:45,747 --> 00:14:48,882 Stan, my stepfather gave this car to me, 302 00:14:48,917 --> 00:14:50,851 and now I'm giving it to you. 303 00:14:50,885 --> 00:14:52,119 And one day? 304 00:14:52,153 --> 00:14:54,254 You'll give it to your stepson. 305 00:14:57,742 --> 00:14:59,560 I'll take good care of her. 306 00:14:59,594 --> 00:15:00,961 I know you will, son... 307 00:15:00,995 --> 00:15:02,796 I mean, Stan. 308 00:15:02,831 --> 00:15:04,565 No, it's okay... 309 00:15:04,599 --> 00:15:05,799 Dad. 310 00:15:07,836 --> 00:15:10,838 You're the man of the house for the weekend. 311 00:15:10,872 --> 00:15:12,339 Wow. 312 00:15:13,775 --> 00:15:15,592 Wow. 313 00:15:15,627 --> 00:15:17,261 Here, take our picture. 314 00:15:17,295 --> 00:15:18,996 I want to remember this day forever. 315 00:15:25,787 --> 00:15:27,054 See ya, sport. 316 00:15:27,088 --> 00:15:28,388 Bye, Dad! Have fun, Dad! 317 00:15:28,423 --> 00:15:29,923 See you when you get back, Dad! 318 00:15:29,958 --> 00:15:32,326 Ooh! I should load this onto Roger's computer as his wallpaper. 319 00:15:32,360 --> 00:15:34,261 Do you think he'll love it? He'll love it. 320 00:15:34,295 --> 00:15:35,896 I can't wait for him to get back! 321 00:15:42,220 --> 00:15:44,288 Oh, my God... 322 00:15:44,322 --> 00:15:47,858 this was Roger's plan all along! 323 00:15:47,892 --> 00:15:51,295 He's gonna kill my mom just to get his attic back! 324 00:15:53,481 --> 00:15:56,116 He's getting another toggle coat?! 325 00:16:01,918 --> 00:16:03,785 Roger's gonna kill my mom! 326 00:16:03,836 --> 00:16:05,904 Out of the way! My family's in danger! 327 00:16:13,596 --> 00:16:15,697 Well? Are you gonna make it?! 328 00:16:15,731 --> 00:16:17,115 Nice try, boys, 329 00:16:17,150 --> 00:16:19,869 but this is obviously not a genuine Randy Scott Knobson. 330 00:16:20,092 --> 00:16:24,402 It's missing one key component: the gay sex scenes. 331 00:16:25,492 --> 00:16:27,753 You see, boys, the Fast & Furious franchise has 332 00:16:27,873 --> 00:16:32,597 to be written, and filmed, super gay. 333 00:16:32,632 --> 00:16:35,300 The gay undertones are what create the chemistry and tension 334 00:16:35,334 --> 00:16:37,469 that make those movies so great. 335 00:16:37,503 --> 00:16:40,906 Oh... I always felt their love went much deeper than cars. 336 00:16:41,127 --> 00:16:44,830 Yep, we shoot everything Randy writes, everything, 337 00:16:44,864 --> 00:16:47,138 and then edit it down for the theaters. 338 00:16:47,258 --> 00:16:49,367 Except France, they get it all. 339 00:16:49,487 --> 00:16:52,671 Wait! We have the sex scenes! 340 00:16:55,976 --> 00:16:59,812 Looks like we're in business, boys. 341 00:17:01,114 --> 00:17:02,982 Yay! We did it! 342 00:17:04,150 --> 00:17:08,671 Come on. Bring it in, bring it in. 343 00:17:10,056 --> 00:17:12,924 I let him into my heart, and he betrayed me! 344 00:17:12,942 --> 00:17:15,277 Well, I'm coming for you, Tom Yabo! 345 00:17:20,400 --> 00:17:22,418 Damn it! I'm gonna have to go for it. 346 00:17:26,939 --> 00:17:29,992 Yes! Yes! The camera is loving you. 347 00:17:30,043 --> 00:17:32,127 Okay, I need sexier, more danger. 348 00:17:32,162 --> 00:17:34,079 Um, get closer to the edge. 349 00:17:34,113 --> 00:17:35,280 Great! Now move over 350 00:17:35,298 --> 00:17:37,115 to the area without the railing in the way. 351 00:17:37,133 --> 00:17:38,167 Perfect! 352 00:17:39,369 --> 00:17:41,503 Uh, we're out of film. 353 00:17:41,554 --> 00:17:44,506 Stay right there, Betts. Gotta reload. 354 00:17:50,730 --> 00:17:52,848 I got this. 355 00:17:52,899 --> 00:17:54,416 It's okay. I can make it! 356 00:17:56,236 --> 00:17:58,087 Whoa, no! I'll never make it! 357 00:18:02,359 --> 00:18:04,376 Aw, man, I wussed out. 358 00:18:09,282 --> 00:18:11,200 Okay, finally got the film in. 359 00:18:11,234 --> 00:18:13,719 Man, that took forever...! 360 00:18:14,921 --> 00:18:16,955 Mom, look out! He's trying to kill you! 361 00:18:16,989 --> 00:18:18,090 What? 362 00:18:18,124 --> 00:18:19,208 Son, no... 363 00:18:19,259 --> 00:18:21,176 It's true! I should've known. 364 00:18:21,211 --> 00:18:23,462 Whenever I let a man inside me, it hurts. 365 00:18:23,496 --> 00:18:25,547 Stan, I'm not trying to kill your mom! 366 00:18:25,582 --> 00:18:27,716 Shut up! I saw your computer! 367 00:18:27,751 --> 00:18:29,551 "How to Kill Your Spouse at Niagara Falls"?! 368 00:18:29,602 --> 00:18:32,771 Stan, he's not trying to kill me. 369 00:18:32,806 --> 00:18:35,774 Because I'm trying to kill him! 370 00:18:37,794 --> 00:18:39,027 Mom, what the hell?! 371 00:18:39,062 --> 00:18:41,730 I told you I wanted to be independent, Stan, 372 00:18:41,765 --> 00:18:43,365 but you wouldn't listen. 373 00:18:43,400 --> 00:18:46,368 So I took out a life insurance policy on Tom. 374 00:18:46,403 --> 00:18:48,804 What?! Betts-Betts! 375 00:18:48,838 --> 00:18:52,324 It was the only way I could afford to live on my own. 376 00:18:52,358 --> 00:18:54,943 I can't hold you both! 377 00:18:54,978 --> 00:18:56,962 I just resewed my rectum! 378 00:18:56,996 --> 00:18:59,665 Then save me, I'm your mother! 379 00:18:59,699 --> 00:19:01,083 And he's a nobody! 380 00:19:01,134 --> 00:19:02,818 You said it yourself, Stan. 381 00:19:02,852 --> 00:19:04,887 Tom Yabo loved us. 382 00:19:04,921 --> 00:19:07,055 And you... you used him! 383 00:19:07,090 --> 00:19:09,191 It's okay, Stan. I used her, too. 384 00:19:09,225 --> 00:19:11,493 What? For the attic? 385 00:19:11,528 --> 00:19:14,096 No, kiddo. To get close to you. 386 00:19:14,130 --> 00:19:18,016 And it was worth it. 387 00:19:18,050 --> 00:19:21,236 No...! 388 00:19:22,272 --> 00:19:23,605 Why'd you let go?! 389 00:19:23,656 --> 00:19:26,108 Because I don't think your mom and I are gonna be able 390 00:19:26,159 --> 00:19:27,659 to patch things up. 391 00:19:27,694 --> 00:19:30,696 And I'd rather be dead than no longer a part of your family! 392 00:19:30,730 --> 00:19:32,531 I was wrong, Roger. 393 00:19:32,565 --> 00:19:35,701 You don't have to be in my family to be my family! 394 00:19:35,735 --> 00:19:37,252 Dude, seriously? 395 00:19:37,287 --> 00:19:40,522 I really wish I'd known before I let go...! 396 00:19:43,293 --> 00:19:45,727 I can't believe he's gone. 397 00:19:45,762 --> 00:19:47,629 He was the best father I ever had. 398 00:19:47,664 --> 00:19:51,099 To your right is one of the best views of the Falls. 399 00:19:52,335 --> 00:19:54,436 Of course it's not the original Niagara Falls, 400 00:19:54,471 --> 00:19:57,022 which burned down in 1816. 401 00:20:02,729 --> 00:20:04,229 All these memories... 402 00:20:06,266 --> 00:20:08,500 So, where is Betty now, anyway? 403 00:20:08,535 --> 00:20:10,636 She ended up collecting the life insurance money 404 00:20:10,670 --> 00:20:13,105 from Tom Yabo's death and moved to Paris. 405 00:20:13,139 --> 00:20:14,773 Guess she's getting the independent life 406 00:20:14,808 --> 00:20:16,542 she wanted all along. 407 00:20:16,576 --> 00:20:17,910 Hey, wait, when was this? 408 00:20:17,944 --> 00:20:19,411 We never hugged. 409 00:20:19,445 --> 00:20:20,879 Not yet. 410 00:20:23,216 --> 00:20:25,484 Do you think things between us will go back 411 00:20:25,518 --> 00:20:28,253 to the way they usually are next week? 412 00:20:28,288 --> 00:20:30,823 I sure hope so. 413 00:20:36,079 --> 00:20:38,080 Une, s'il vous plaît. 414 00:20:38,114 --> 00:20:40,816 Is this happening too fast? 415 00:20:40,850 --> 00:20:43,986 I'd be furious if it wasn't. 416 00:20:49,626 --> 00:20:52,661 Tastes so good. Mmm, mmm... 417 00:20:54,264 --> 00:20:57,399 Did I miss any play? 418 00:20:57,433 --> 00:20:59,234 Tons. 419 00:21:01,126 --> 00:21:11,799 Sync & corrections by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com