1 00:00:05,564 --> 00:00:08,674 Sorry. That's my e-mail notification. 2 00:00:08,774 --> 00:00:10,804 Looks like it's official. 3 00:00:10,904 --> 00:00:12,674 You're looking at the newest member 4 00:00:12,774 --> 00:00:15,474 of an exclusive little club known as... 5 00:00:15,574 --> 00:00:17,574 Scientology. 6 00:00:17,674 --> 00:00:20,084 - You became a Scientologist? - It wasn't easy. 7 00:00:20,184 --> 00:00:22,454 They did everything they could to discourage me. 8 00:00:22,554 --> 00:00:24,154 Just think. 9 00:00:24,254 --> 00:00:26,354 You might get to go to Kirstie Alley's funeral! 10 00:00:26,454 --> 00:00:28,954 What's wrong? 11 00:00:29,054 --> 00:00:31,664 He's dead! 12 00:00:31,764 --> 00:00:34,324 - Jeff? - No! 13 00:00:34,424 --> 00:00:36,864 Tom Green! 14 00:00:36,964 --> 00:00:38,964 I just saw on Twitter, and he... 15 00:00:39,064 --> 00:00:41,604 Oh, Gaww-hoddddd! 16 00:00:44,474 --> 00:00:46,304 This is ridiculous. 17 00:00:46,404 --> 00:00:47,874 I'll have to call in sick for work. 18 00:00:47,974 --> 00:00:50,814 What?! Was he your ride or something? 19 00:00:50,914 --> 00:00:52,784 Babe! Good news! 20 00:00:52,884 --> 00:00:56,054 Turns out it was just one of his hilarious pranks! 21 00:00:56,154 --> 00:00:59,024 Well, now I feel like a fool! 22 00:00:59,124 --> 00:01:01,954 I won't be able to go to work all week! 23 00:01:07,394 --> 00:01:09,294 Where did I go wrong, Klaus? 24 00:01:09,394 --> 00:01:11,134 How did Hayley end up as soft 25 00:01:11,234 --> 00:01:14,204 as my prized Toronto Raptors micro fleece throw? 26 00:01:14,304 --> 00:01:16,734 And what will become of her if she doesn't toughen up? 27 00:01:16,834 --> 00:01:18,374 It's time for me to go... 28 00:01:18,474 --> 00:01:20,744 on one of my famous drives. 29 00:01:22,744 --> 00:01:26,584 Oh. Look who just got a 30% off coupon 30 00:01:26,684 --> 00:01:29,714 for all sectionals at wayfair.com. 31 00:01:29,814 --> 00:01:33,354 Scientology's already working its magic. 32 00:02:05,624 --> 00:02:08,224 How did Hayley become so weak? 33 00:02:08,324 --> 00:02:10,754 Did I fail her as a father? 34 00:02:10,854 --> 00:02:13,864 Will she be able to take care of herself when I'm gone? 35 00:02:13,964 --> 00:02:15,394 How can I make her tough? 36 00:02:17,064 --> 00:02:19,564 I can't think with all this racket! 37 00:02:19,664 --> 00:02:22,474 I need to go deeper into the countryside. 38 00:02:28,844 --> 00:02:30,714 No more distractions. 39 00:02:30,814 --> 00:02:32,744 At last, my head is clear. 40 00:02:37,554 --> 00:02:39,724 Lost your way, city slicker? 41 00:02:41,324 --> 00:02:43,754 Are you a good hillbilly or a bad hillbilly? 42 00:02:43,854 --> 00:02:46,624 I'm a farmer. And this here's my farm. 43 00:02:46,724 --> 00:02:48,964 Don't worry. We'll get ya unstuck right quick. 44 00:02:55,064 --> 00:02:56,734 Mother. Dan-boy. 45 00:02:56,834 --> 00:02:58,644 Birthin' the sow'll have to wait. 46 00:02:58,744 --> 00:03:01,174 We got a man here needs our help. 47 00:03:03,074 --> 00:03:05,814 Well, let's git to it, then. 48 00:03:09,454 --> 00:03:11,114 Strong. 49 00:03:20,294 --> 00:03:21,794 Resilient. 50 00:03:24,694 --> 00:03:26,304 Raaaah! 51 00:03:30,574 --> 00:03:34,504 Toughness. The very yin to weakness' yang. 52 00:03:34,604 --> 00:03:37,514 How did you come to be so strong, so resilient? 53 00:03:37,614 --> 00:03:41,384 Well, I reckon farm life just makes ya Farm Tough. 54 00:03:41,484 --> 00:03:43,354 Farm Tough. 55 00:03:43,454 --> 00:03:45,954 Here. At least let me Venmo you a little barn-dance money 56 00:03:46,054 --> 00:03:47,684 to thank you for your trouble. 57 00:03:47,784 --> 00:03:51,364 We don't go in much for electronic doodads and gewgaws. 58 00:03:51,464 --> 00:03:53,824 Keep things a mite simpler out here on the farm. 59 00:03:53,924 --> 00:03:56,164 Thick as rhino skin. 60 00:03:56,264 --> 00:03:59,304 Dan-boy, if it's not too forward of me, may I... 61 00:03:59,404 --> 00:04:00,964 have one of your calluses? 62 00:04:01,064 --> 00:04:03,674 You got a flapper here. I could just give it a little twist. 63 00:04:03,774 --> 00:04:05,974 - I'd prefer you didn't. - I've already got it. 64 00:04:06,074 --> 00:04:07,644 Came right off. Damn. 65 00:04:07,744 --> 00:04:09,974 I bet I could use this thing as a guitar pick! 66 00:04:18,254 --> 00:04:20,584 Callus, callus, show me true. 67 00:04:20,684 --> 00:04:23,054 Why is Hayley not tough, too? 68 00:04:24,654 --> 00:04:26,194 Not showing me a vision. 69 00:04:26,294 --> 00:04:28,094 Guess I'll just go take a look myself. 70 00:04:31,464 --> 00:04:33,064 Of course! Look at them 71 00:04:33,164 --> 00:04:36,274 with all their electronic doodads and gewgaws! 72 00:04:36,374 --> 00:04:38,504 No wonder Hayley's as soft as my prized 73 00:04:38,604 --> 00:04:42,014 Merino wool Charlotte Hornets beanie. 74 00:04:48,284 --> 00:04:51,454 There's the vision! Callus, I could kiss you! 75 00:04:54,024 --> 00:04:55,524 Stan, what are you doing? 76 00:04:55,624 --> 00:04:57,924 Nothing! 77 00:05:01,694 --> 00:05:04,194 I call this Smith family meeting to order. 78 00:05:05,804 --> 00:05:08,534 Bread's fresher than usual. 79 00:05:08,634 --> 00:05:11,234 Now, there's no easy way to say this, so here goes. 80 00:05:11,334 --> 00:05:14,244 This family is soft. Especially Hayley. 81 00:05:14,344 --> 00:05:15,944 Actually, that was pretty easy. 82 00:05:16,044 --> 00:05:17,774 - What? - Well, no more. 83 00:05:17,874 --> 00:05:20,544 You've still got that thing? 84 00:05:20,644 --> 00:05:23,154 It's time, through hard work and simple living, 85 00:05:23,254 --> 00:05:26,324 for the Smith family to become... Farm Tough. 86 00:05:26,424 --> 00:05:28,284 Oop. Dropped my callus in the baked ziti. 87 00:05:28,384 --> 00:05:29,924 Everybody just be aware. 88 00:05:30,024 --> 00:05:32,824 Anyway, I say we leave our city lives behind 89 00:05:32,924 --> 00:05:34,594 and move to a farm! 90 00:05:34,694 --> 00:05:38,464 Oh, yeah! I'm gonna be the toughest little farm boy ever! 91 00:05:38,564 --> 00:05:41,604 Playing with horsies and moo-moos all day. 92 00:05:41,704 --> 00:05:42,934 Mee! 93 00:05:43,034 --> 00:05:44,804 And my first celebrity crush 94 00:05:44,904 --> 00:05:47,904 was that old farmer in that painting... 95 00:05:48,004 --> 00:05:52,014 holding that big-ass pitchfork. 96 00:05:52,114 --> 00:05:56,354 A simple farm life, you say? Oh, man, I just don't know. 97 00:05:56,454 --> 00:05:58,084 I think it would be good for us. 98 00:05:58,184 --> 00:06:00,084 I guess I'm open to being convinced, 99 00:06:00,184 --> 00:06:01,994 but I'm really on the fence here. 100 00:06:02,094 --> 00:06:04,954 - Let's have a vote. - Okay, but I'm still undecided. 101 00:06:05,054 --> 00:06:07,294 All in favor? 102 00:06:07,394 --> 00:06:08,464 Damn it, Hayley! 103 00:06:08,564 --> 00:06:10,364 Per Smith family bylaws, 104 00:06:10,464 --> 00:06:13,034 all family votes must be unanimous. 105 00:06:13,134 --> 00:06:15,474 We know, Kevin! 106 00:06:15,574 --> 00:06:18,004 Look, I do like the idea of living more sustainably, 107 00:06:18,104 --> 00:06:20,444 but we don't need to move to a farm. 108 00:06:20,544 --> 00:06:22,214 Hey, why don't we try urban homesteading? 109 00:06:22,314 --> 00:06:24,144 That's when people in cities do small-scale 110 00:06:24,244 --> 00:06:25,984 farming in their backyards. 111 00:06:26,084 --> 00:06:29,114 Fine. All in favor? 112 00:06:29,214 --> 00:06:31,654 I just swallowed the callus. 113 00:06:34,254 --> 00:06:36,154 Okay, so, farming. 114 00:06:36,254 --> 00:06:38,824 We're probably gonna need some dirt, right? 115 00:06:38,924 --> 00:06:42,564 Should we... buy it? Or make it? 116 00:06:42,664 --> 00:06:45,194 That's great, sweetie. Let me just scooch ya over here a bit. 117 00:06:45,294 --> 00:06:47,034 You're right in the path of the bulldozer. 118 00:06:47,134 --> 00:06:49,304 Thanks, Dad. And... In the what of the what, now? 119 00:06:52,244 --> 00:06:55,474 To get Farm Tough, we're gonna need more room to farm. 120 00:06:55,574 --> 00:06:58,844 Come on! I got overalls for everyone out back! 121 00:07:00,014 --> 00:07:04,554 You guys! Come check out this huge pile of worms! 122 00:07:07,184 --> 00:07:09,224 Okay. See ya at the overalls! 123 00:07:15,094 --> 00:07:17,364 Dad, this is not what we agreed to! 124 00:07:17,464 --> 00:07:19,664 Sure it is. This was your idea, Hayley... 125 00:07:19,764 --> 00:07:22,174 Urban homesteading, farming right in the heart of the city. 126 00:07:22,274 --> 00:07:24,404 Small-scale farming! 127 00:07:24,504 --> 00:07:27,344 Well, if it's small-scale that gets your engine revving, 128 00:07:27,444 --> 00:07:29,674 you're gonna love our new tiny farmhouse. 129 00:07:29,774 --> 00:07:32,044 Come on, everybody. I'll give you the tour. 130 00:07:33,214 --> 00:07:34,614 How are we gonna sleep? 131 00:07:34,714 --> 00:07:38,054 Not on a stack of 20 downy mattresses, princess. 132 00:07:38,154 --> 00:07:40,624 For the last time, I didn't say, "I felt a pea." 133 00:07:40,724 --> 00:07:42,724 I said my mattress "smelled like pee." 134 00:07:42,824 --> 00:07:44,554 - I peed the bed. - Anyway, I'll show you 135 00:07:44,654 --> 00:07:46,724 how you'll sleep, 'cause it's bedtime anyway. 136 00:07:46,824 --> 00:07:50,034 We're on farm hours now. Bed by 4:00. Up at 2:00. 137 00:07:50,134 --> 00:07:52,564 - Steve-boy, this is you. - I can't fit in there. 138 00:07:52,664 --> 00:07:54,434 Just give it a try, Steve-boy. 139 00:07:54,534 --> 00:07:55,934 - Yes, Mother. - Correction. 140 00:07:56,034 --> 00:07:57,534 Now that we're farm folk, 141 00:07:57,634 --> 00:07:59,804 I'm the one who calls my wife "Mother." 142 00:07:59,904 --> 00:08:02,814 Night! 143 00:08:02,914 --> 00:08:05,314 Oh, God! 144 00:08:05,414 --> 00:08:06,984 Roger. 145 00:08:09,554 --> 00:08:11,454 Hayley and Jeff. 146 00:08:13,154 --> 00:08:15,454 And, Mother, if you open up this oil painting 147 00:08:15,554 --> 00:08:17,994 of blond Jesus, there's a cupboard behind. 148 00:08:24,934 --> 00:08:26,264 Hello! 149 00:08:29,504 --> 00:08:30,934 Hi. 150 00:08:35,244 --> 00:08:36,914 Stan, this is Amos. 151 00:08:37,014 --> 00:08:38,914 Hey. 152 00:08:42,014 --> 00:08:44,654 Amos! It's not what it looks like! 153 00:08:47,724 --> 00:08:50,154 Oh, yeah! 154 00:08:50,254 --> 00:08:52,794 I feel myself gettin' tougher already! 155 00:08:52,894 --> 00:08:54,094 Mornin', neighbor! 156 00:08:57,694 --> 00:08:59,364 Well, look who it is. 157 00:08:59,464 --> 00:09:01,974 Sun's already almost up, Sleeping Beauty. 158 00:09:02,074 --> 00:09:05,434 I was stuck in the wall fighting off hundreds of tiny spiders! 159 00:09:05,534 --> 00:09:07,544 Oh, yeah, we're raising spiders now, too. 160 00:09:07,644 --> 00:09:09,344 I'm gonna sell 'em to a Spider-Man movie! 161 00:09:09,444 --> 00:09:10,874 Which we'll never see, of course, 162 00:09:10,974 --> 00:09:13,544 because we're foregoing all modern technology. 163 00:09:13,644 --> 00:09:15,044 On pain of shunning? 164 00:09:15,144 --> 00:09:17,184 Done! We'll need maximum discipline 165 00:09:17,284 --> 00:09:19,624 because this homestead must succeed. 166 00:09:19,724 --> 00:09:21,384 I quit my job and took out a mortgage 167 00:09:21,484 --> 00:09:24,324 with a 39% interest rate to pay for the renovations. 168 00:09:24,424 --> 00:09:26,694 - You did what?! - The bankers were high-fiving 169 00:09:26,794 --> 00:09:28,364 while I signed the paperwork. 170 00:09:28,464 --> 00:09:30,834 Looking back, probably should've been a red flag. 171 00:09:30,934 --> 00:09:34,034 Maybe we need to worry less about me becoming Farm Tough 172 00:09:34,134 --> 00:09:37,334 and more about you being so Farm Stupid! 173 00:09:37,434 --> 00:09:39,044 Shun 'er, Stan! 174 00:09:39,144 --> 00:09:41,244 She talketh back to thee, dude! 175 00:09:41,344 --> 00:09:43,484 Hold up. Wait, though. I want to get this for my TikTok. 176 00:09:43,514 --> 00:09:44,814 Gewgaw! 177 00:09:44,914 --> 00:09:47,144 Shit. I'mma get shunned, aren't I? 178 00:09:47,244 --> 00:09:50,414 Roger has violated the rules of the farm. 179 00:09:50,514 --> 00:09:52,154 He must be shunned. 180 00:09:52,254 --> 00:09:55,654 It was one mistake, and we just came up with the rule. 181 00:09:55,754 --> 00:09:57,494 Why are you being so hard on him? 182 00:09:57,594 --> 00:09:59,894 Because modern luxuries make us soft. 183 00:09:59,994 --> 00:10:02,334 Roger, you are shunned. 184 00:10:04,664 --> 00:10:07,704 Whatever. I'm still the most Amish mother-fucker here. 185 00:10:12,704 --> 00:10:14,004 Hey, Stan. 186 00:10:14,104 --> 00:10:15,574 I just want to give you an update 187 00:10:15,674 --> 00:10:19,184 on the K-dog's adventures in Scientology. 188 00:10:19,284 --> 00:10:22,054 Long story short, it works! 189 00:10:22,154 --> 00:10:24,284 I had a major personal breakthrough. 190 00:10:24,384 --> 00:10:26,054 I realized... 191 00:10:26,154 --> 00:10:30,224 that Battlefield Earth is a cool movie! 192 00:10:30,324 --> 00:10:32,364 Ohp. Gotta go. 193 00:10:32,464 --> 00:10:34,764 They're starting it again, and I don't want to be late 194 00:10:34,864 --> 00:10:38,534 because if you are, they beat you senseless. 195 00:10:38,634 --> 00:10:40,634 All right. Tell everyone I'm doing great. 196 00:10:40,734 --> 00:10:43,204 Xenu later, alligator! 197 00:10:48,374 --> 00:10:51,074 Aaaah! I broke my leg! 198 00:10:51,174 --> 00:10:53,314 Rabbit hole. We got varmints. 199 00:10:53,414 --> 00:10:57,584 That's bad. But the pain'll toughen Steve up. That's good. 200 00:10:57,684 --> 00:11:00,754 Should we all break our legs? Yes! 201 00:11:01,954 --> 00:11:03,624 Everybody, line up! 202 00:11:06,624 --> 00:11:08,164 Varmint! 203 00:11:08,994 --> 00:11:11,094 Stop! You don't have to kill it! 204 00:11:11,194 --> 00:11:12,194 Yes, we do, Hayley! 205 00:11:12,264 --> 00:11:14,734 Varmints suck the very lifeblood out of a farm. 206 00:11:14,834 --> 00:11:17,574 Rabbits, termites, orangutans. 207 00:11:17,674 --> 00:11:19,474 The only good varmint is... 208 00:11:19,574 --> 00:11:20,674 A dead varmint? 209 00:11:20,774 --> 00:11:22,514 No! A rock-'n'-roll gopher, 210 00:11:22,614 --> 00:11:25,344 like that zany little troublemaker from Caddyshack. 211 00:11:25,444 --> 00:11:28,414 We can keep it away from our crops without killing it. 212 00:11:28,514 --> 00:11:30,954 I'm gonna go release it in the woods at the end of the block. 213 00:11:31,054 --> 00:11:34,484 Hayley, how are you still so far from being Farm Tough? 214 00:11:34,584 --> 00:11:37,324 Dan-boy will never accept my dowry if you're this soft. 215 00:11:37,424 --> 00:11:38,994 I'm already married to Jeff! 216 00:11:39,094 --> 00:11:42,594 But I promised Dan-boy a brawny virgin! 217 00:11:46,834 --> 00:11:49,334 Oh, no. Your leg is broken. 218 00:12:02,884 --> 00:12:05,824 Sorry, little guy. This is gonna hurt a bit. 219 00:12:07,624 --> 00:12:10,024 Suppertime! 220 00:12:13,464 --> 00:12:18,064 That's it? But, Pa, I'm so hungry. 221 00:12:18,164 --> 00:12:20,274 Well, if you're thinking about sneakin' extra carrots, 222 00:12:20,304 --> 00:12:22,004 you are gunnin' for a shunnin'. 223 00:12:22,104 --> 00:12:24,204 You know the rules... No electric stuff, 224 00:12:24,304 --> 00:12:26,574 no extra food, no creature comforts. 225 00:12:26,674 --> 00:12:30,214 So strict, so strong. 226 00:12:30,314 --> 00:12:34,184 Why don't you join old Mother Hubbard in her cupboard 227 00:12:34,284 --> 00:12:37,514 and give this creature a little comfort? 228 00:12:39,024 --> 00:12:41,154 Yes, ma'am! 229 00:12:45,864 --> 00:12:47,324 I'm gonna have my carrot outside. 230 00:12:47,424 --> 00:12:48,864 Wait! Take me with you! 231 00:12:50,294 --> 00:12:51,534 Mother, may I? 232 00:12:51,634 --> 00:12:53,264 You may! 233 00:12:59,874 --> 00:13:01,674 Looks like you're all healed up! 234 00:13:02,944 --> 00:13:07,214 See? How much trouble could one widdle shbunny-shmunchkin 235 00:13:07,314 --> 00:13:10,114 like you cause, anyway? 236 00:13:24,134 --> 00:13:25,864 This is all my fault. 237 00:13:25,964 --> 00:13:28,804 I... coddled a varmint. 238 00:13:28,904 --> 00:13:30,274 Well, with no carrots to sell, 239 00:13:30,374 --> 00:13:32,604 it's only a matter of time before we lose the farm. 240 00:13:32,704 --> 00:13:34,804 I've heard tell of a man six counties over 241 00:13:34,904 --> 00:13:36,244 might buy our goat. 242 00:13:36,344 --> 00:13:39,714 If I don't make it back, tell your mother... 243 00:13:39,814 --> 00:13:42,254 sorry I busted my nut so quick. 244 00:13:42,354 --> 00:13:43,784 She'll know what it means. 245 00:13:43,884 --> 00:13:45,254 Let me try to make this right. 246 00:13:45,354 --> 00:13:46,904 There's still time to re-plant and harvest 247 00:13:46,924 --> 00:13:49,324 - the crops before winter. - You can try. 248 00:13:49,424 --> 00:13:50,824 But with Steve-boy lame, 249 00:13:50,924 --> 00:13:54,164 Jeff-boy sick with TB and Mother-boy tending to him, 250 00:13:54,264 --> 00:13:57,264 you'll have to do it all on your own, Hayley-boy. 251 00:14:30,694 --> 00:14:32,034 I did it. 252 00:14:33,764 --> 00:14:35,504 Boy 253 00:14:36,934 --> 00:14:38,434 There's violence 254 00:14:38,534 --> 00:14:41,604 And and a-lots of work to be done 255 00:14:42,944 --> 00:14:46,544 No place to hang out our washing 256 00:14:46,644 --> 00:14:50,154 And and I can't blame all on the sun, oh, no 257 00:14:50,254 --> 00:14:54,724 I love my secret room of electric stuff and food 258 00:14:54,824 --> 00:14:57,524 And all my creature comforts 259 00:14:57,624 --> 00:14:58,724 Time extension. 260 00:14:58,824 --> 00:15:00,624 You've been sneaking down here 261 00:15:00,724 --> 00:15:02,864 since the very first day, haven't you?! 262 00:15:02,994 --> 00:15:05,194 Breaking all your own stupid rules! 263 00:15:05,294 --> 00:15:06,534 Hey, this has always been 264 00:15:06,634 --> 00:15:08,704 about making you Farm Tough. Not me. 265 00:15:08,804 --> 00:15:12,174 Well, guess what. I have become tough. 266 00:15:12,274 --> 00:15:13,644 Tough enough to know you can't show 267 00:15:13,744 --> 00:15:16,244 a varmint like you any mercy. 268 00:15:16,344 --> 00:15:19,084 So, Dad, you are... 269 00:15:19,184 --> 00:15:21,014 shunned! 270 00:15:22,354 --> 00:15:24,884 Well, at least let me go back for my digital cocktail scale 271 00:15:24,984 --> 00:15:27,224 That I... 272 00:15:27,324 --> 00:15:29,894 Smiths! What's the good word? 273 00:15:29,994 --> 00:15:32,724 Movin' right along! 274 00:15:38,934 --> 00:15:41,404 You must really miss your family, Stan? 275 00:15:41,504 --> 00:15:43,734 Think you'll be able to go back soon? 276 00:15:43,834 --> 00:15:46,874 Wouldn't bet on it. Shunning's serious business. 277 00:15:46,974 --> 00:15:49,374 But on the bright side, I succeeded in my goal. 278 00:15:49,474 --> 00:15:52,514 Hayley is tougher than a thousand Jason Momoas. 279 00:15:52,614 --> 00:15:56,184 By the way, I accidentally ordered nine pornos last night. 280 00:16:01,954 --> 00:16:06,124 Sometimes it's crazy what great parenting looks like. 281 00:16:06,224 --> 00:16:08,594 - Closer than you might think! - What? 282 00:16:08,694 --> 00:16:10,534 Oh. Oh, I thought maybe you just said, 283 00:16:10,634 --> 00:16:12,364 "I wonder where Roger is right now." 284 00:16:12,464 --> 00:16:14,804 - Nope. - Well, here I am anyway. 285 00:16:14,904 --> 00:16:16,074 Yeah, after you shunned me, 286 00:16:16,174 --> 00:16:17,704 I kind of fell in with the varmints. 287 00:16:17,804 --> 00:16:19,374 Got any vegetables going here? 288 00:16:19,474 --> 00:16:21,374 Too risky over at the old Smith farm, 289 00:16:21,474 --> 00:16:22,974 ever since Hayley took over. 290 00:16:23,074 --> 00:16:25,044 She's tough as nails. 291 00:16:25,144 --> 00:16:26,994 I don't know, Stan. Maybe you should take a look 292 00:16:27,014 --> 00:16:29,614 at what being tough has really done to her. 293 00:16:36,124 --> 00:16:37,794 Hayley? 294 00:16:37,894 --> 00:16:41,494 I was wonderin', since the harvest come in so good, 295 00:16:41,594 --> 00:16:44,934 maybe we could afford to call a doctor for Jeff-boy? 296 00:16:45,034 --> 00:16:47,164 He's in a bad way. 297 00:16:47,264 --> 00:16:51,404 Ya don't waste a bone on a dyin' dog, woman. 298 00:16:57,844 --> 00:17:00,614 Set a pot to boil. 299 00:17:00,714 --> 00:17:02,654 And I don't wanna hear another word outta you, 300 00:17:02,754 --> 00:17:04,314 or you're goin' in the box. 301 00:17:04,414 --> 00:17:06,984 But Steve-boy's already in the box. 302 00:17:07,084 --> 00:17:08,984 I can make another box. 303 00:17:09,084 --> 00:17:11,294 When can I come out the box, sister? 304 00:17:11,394 --> 00:17:14,364 I said no talkin' in there! Punishment increased! 305 00:17:22,064 --> 00:17:24,004 Jeff-boy. 306 00:17:24,104 --> 00:17:27,044 Time to take that dyin' dog to the woods 307 00:17:27,144 --> 00:17:29,714 what he don't attract critters when he croaks. 308 00:17:33,814 --> 00:17:37,554 This takes me back to our wedding night, babe. 309 00:17:39,254 --> 00:17:43,654 I'm gonna give it to you so good. 310 00:17:44,794 --> 00:17:47,524 The farm has made Hayley too tough. 311 00:17:47,624 --> 00:17:51,334 So, to get the old Hayley back, we gotta take that farm down. 312 00:17:51,434 --> 00:17:54,634 - What are you thinking? - Good old-fashioned sabotage. 313 00:17:54,734 --> 00:17:56,974 Varmint sabotage? 314 00:17:57,074 --> 00:17:58,474 Rabbitage! 315 00:17:58,574 --> 00:17:59,574 Let's do it! 316 00:17:59,644 --> 00:18:01,744 And do we contact Weird Al's people, 317 00:18:01,844 --> 00:18:04,744 see if he's interested in "Rabbitage" as a song idea, 318 00:18:04,844 --> 00:18:06,544 make ourselves a little scratch? 319 00:18:06,644 --> 00:18:08,914 It'd be pretty cool to collaborate with Weird Al, 320 00:18:09,014 --> 00:18:11,014 but I don't see it happening. 321 00:18:21,624 --> 00:18:24,994 I'll nab cabbage and do plant damage 322 00:18:25,094 --> 00:18:27,004 I'mma masticate, the crops I take 323 00:18:27,104 --> 00:18:29,574 You can't grow carrots while I'm in here 324 00:18:29,674 --> 00:18:33,874 Now my bunny ears cause your bunny fears so 325 00:18:33,974 --> 00:18:36,674 While you re-seed and wonder why 326 00:18:36,774 --> 00:18:39,514 Your farm's in ruins, corn has all died 327 00:18:39,614 --> 00:18:42,254 Holes in sod, missing cabb-age 328 00:18:42,354 --> 00:18:45,184 I'm tellin' y'all it's rabbitage 329 00:18:45,284 --> 00:18:47,884 Listen, all y'all, it's rabbitage 330 00:18:57,064 --> 00:19:01,534 Varmints! I'm comin' fer you! 331 00:19:11,974 --> 00:19:15,484 That's right, Stan. I found a way. 332 00:19:20,324 --> 00:19:22,254 This farm's as good as done for, Roger. 333 00:19:22,354 --> 00:19:23,994 Just be careful of all these traps. 334 00:19:24,094 --> 00:19:25,294 Luckily for me, 335 00:19:25,394 --> 00:19:28,264 I'm a bit smarter than an actual rabbit, Stan. 336 00:19:28,364 --> 00:19:30,964 Would ya look at that? Somebody left a perfectly good 337 00:19:31,064 --> 00:19:33,404 sploop of peanut butter underneath this bucket. 338 00:19:33,504 --> 00:19:34,744 Varmint! 339 00:19:45,714 --> 00:19:47,184 Do it, Hayley. 340 00:19:47,284 --> 00:19:49,914 I've been depressed for a good, long while now. 341 00:19:50,014 --> 00:19:52,254 Hayley, stop! Roger, we'll get you help. 342 00:19:52,354 --> 00:19:54,924 Listen. I owe you an apology. 343 00:19:55,024 --> 00:19:56,454 What good is making you tough enough 344 00:19:56,554 --> 00:19:58,654 to take care of yourself if along the way, 345 00:19:58,754 --> 00:20:00,034 you lose everything that made you 346 00:20:00,124 --> 00:20:03,934 such a kind, compassionate, wonderful person to begin with? 347 00:20:04,034 --> 00:20:07,334 I miss that Hayley. The soft Hayley. 348 00:20:08,434 --> 00:20:10,974 Well, I guess... 349 00:20:11,074 --> 00:20:14,444 I'll be killin' two varmints today. 350 00:20:15,644 --> 00:20:18,374 - Can't shoot through a blanket! - Get this thang offa me! 351 00:20:18,474 --> 00:20:21,114 So got-dang... soft! 352 00:20:21,214 --> 00:20:22,884 And plush, and... 353 00:20:25,584 --> 00:20:28,854 James Corden. So mildly amusing. 354 00:20:35,394 --> 00:20:38,134 Creature comforts. 355 00:20:38,234 --> 00:20:41,204 I guess I got a little carried away? 356 00:20:42,774 --> 00:20:45,374 I'm just glad to have you back, baby girl, 357 00:20:45,474 --> 00:20:47,304 and that we put everything back to normal 358 00:20:47,404 --> 00:20:49,414 before anybody really got hurt. 359 00:20:49,514 --> 00:20:51,474 So cold. 360 00:20:51,574 --> 00:20:53,684 Jeff! Thank God! 361 00:20:53,784 --> 00:20:54,884 They're hunting me, Jeff. 362 00:20:54,984 --> 00:20:57,484 They do not like it when you joke about Xenu. 363 00:20:57,584 --> 00:21:02,184 Or when you wear a wire for Xenu York Times. 364 00:21:02,284 --> 00:21:04,194 Bye! Have a great time!