1 00:00:01,044 --> 00:00:04,395 ♪ 2 00:00:04,395 --> 00:00:06,832 - [bell clanging] - It's crab night, baby! 3 00:00:06,832 --> 00:00:08,486 [cracking] 4 00:00:11,576 --> 00:00:14,275 Mmm! Mmm. Mmm. 5 00:00:14,275 --> 00:00:17,060 KLAUS: Boy, do I love crab season. 6 00:00:17,060 --> 00:00:19,193 - Anyone get any meat? - ALL: No. 7 00:00:19,193 --> 00:00:21,847 That fish monger at Whole Foods made a fool of you again! 8 00:00:21,847 --> 00:00:23,632 Godangit! 9 00:00:23,632 --> 00:00:24,894 [whirring] 10 00:00:24,894 --> 00:00:26,852 [electricity crackles] 11 00:00:26,852 --> 00:00:29,072 [whirring stops] 12 00:00:29,072 --> 00:00:32,293 Anyone wanna go in on soup dumplings? I have a code. 13 00:00:32,293 --> 00:00:34,469 Can't. I have a troop meeting. 14 00:00:34,469 --> 00:00:36,471 Since when are you involved with Girl Scouts? 15 00:00:36,471 --> 00:00:38,255 I've been working with this down-and-out troop 16 00:00:38,255 --> 00:00:39,691 for a couple weeks now. 17 00:00:39,691 --> 00:00:41,432 It's been so fulfilling to give back 18 00:00:41,432 --> 00:00:44,044 because girls really do face so many obstacles. 19 00:00:44,044 --> 00:00:45,393 Never run into that myself. 20 00:00:45,393 --> 00:00:47,656 Plus, I get to give the support I never got 21 00:00:47,656 --> 00:00:49,092 when I was a Girl Scout. 22 00:00:49,092 --> 00:00:50,441 You were in Girl Scouts? 23 00:00:50,441 --> 00:00:51,921 ♪ 24 00:00:51,921 --> 00:00:53,923 I just got my archery badge! 25 00:00:53,923 --> 00:00:55,968 Uh-huh. I'm busy. 26 00:00:55,968 --> 00:00:58,754 We just won the big jamboree! 27 00:00:58,754 --> 00:01:02,758 Can't you see I'm trying to enjoy this night with my jar? 28 00:01:02,758 --> 00:01:03,933 [whistle blows] 29 00:01:03,933 --> 00:01:05,195 I'm quitting Girl Scouts. 30 00:01:05,195 --> 00:01:07,719 You don't care about it, and neither do I. 31 00:01:07,719 --> 00:01:09,504 - You're quitting what, now? - Girl Scouts! 32 00:01:09,504 --> 00:01:11,114 ♪ 33 00:01:11,114 --> 00:01:12,724 You were in Girl Scouts? 34 00:01:12,724 --> 00:01:14,117 Yes! I was! 35 00:01:14,117 --> 00:01:15,771 But you completely missed it 36 00:01:15,771 --> 00:01:17,425 because you never pay attention to me. 37 00:01:17,425 --> 00:01:18,991 It's true, Stan. 38 00:01:18,991 --> 00:01:20,819 You don't pay attention to either of your kids. 39 00:01:20,819 --> 00:01:23,779 If I pay too close attention, I notice all their faults. 40 00:01:23,779 --> 00:01:25,128 Like, look at Steve. 41 00:01:25,128 --> 00:01:26,608 I'm looking at him, and all I see 42 00:01:26,608 --> 00:01:29,176 is that scrawny body and little chin. 43 00:01:29,176 --> 00:01:31,352 He has glasses. His eyes don't work right. 44 00:01:31,352 --> 00:01:33,571 And I hate the frames he chose. They don't work for his face... 45 00:01:33,571 --> 00:01:35,791 STEVE: Oof. This is pretty rough stuff. 46 00:01:35,791 --> 00:01:38,707 Thankfully I can retreat into my rich fantasy life. 47 00:01:38,707 --> 00:01:42,798 I wonder what it would be like to be the wizard Merlin... 48 00:01:42,798 --> 00:01:45,061 ziz secretary... 49 00:01:45,061 --> 00:01:46,976 ♪ 50 00:01:46,976 --> 00:01:48,673 Running low on quills. 51 00:01:48,673 --> 00:01:51,763 I know he likes the gray quills. Says they write more smoothly. 52 00:01:51,763 --> 00:01:56,159 And if Merlin says they're smooth, then smooth they are. 53 00:01:56,159 --> 00:01:58,074 Oh, Merl. 54 00:01:58,074 --> 00:01:59,989 MERLIN: [singsong voice] Steve! 55 00:01:59,989 --> 00:02:02,122 Ah! I just want to make sure my robe 56 00:02:02,122 --> 00:02:04,298 is back from the launderer, hm? 57 00:02:04,298 --> 00:02:07,779 Got that big soiree with Lancelot and Arthur tonight. 58 00:02:07,779 --> 00:02:10,260 The robe? Of course! 59 00:02:10,260 --> 00:02:11,914 The robe's handled. 60 00:02:11,914 --> 00:02:14,046 Magical. 61 00:02:14,046 --> 00:02:16,136 ♪ 62 00:02:16,136 --> 00:02:17,789 STAN: ...he's constantly daydreaming... 63 00:02:17,789 --> 00:02:19,748 I forgot the robe! 64 00:02:19,748 --> 00:02:21,837 And now he's forgotten the robe. 65 00:02:21,837 --> 00:02:24,883 [patriotic music plays] 66 00:02:24,883 --> 00:02:27,321 ♪ Good morning, U.S.A.♪ 67 00:02:27,321 --> 00:02:31,151 ♪ I got a feelin' that it's gonna be a wonderful day♪ 68 00:02:31,151 --> 00:02:34,284 ♪ The sun in the sky has a smile on his face♪ 69 00:02:34,284 --> 00:02:38,288 ♪ And he's shinin' a salute to the American race♪ 70 00:02:40,334 --> 00:02:43,902 ♪ Oh, boy, it's swell to say♪ 71 00:02:43,902 --> 00:02:46,209 -♪ Good--♪ -♪ Good morning, U.S.A.♪ 72 00:02:46,209 --> 00:02:47,036 Aah! 73 00:02:48,733 --> 00:02:50,431 -♪ Good morning, U--♪ - [siren wails] 74 00:02:52,650 --> 00:02:54,609 Guess I'm done singing. What'd I do? 75 00:02:54,609 --> 00:02:56,219 You crashed into the flagpole. 76 00:02:56,219 --> 00:02:58,178 Yes. But don't worry. My car is fine. 77 00:02:58,178 --> 00:02:59,701 Now, if you'll excuse me... 78 00:02:59,701 --> 00:03:01,572 You can't leave, sir. 79 00:03:01,572 --> 00:03:03,095 - What about him? - Sir, that's a cat. 80 00:03:03,095 --> 00:03:04,662 I'm writing you a ticket. 81 00:03:04,662 --> 00:03:06,795 I'm allowed to crash into the flagpole! 82 00:03:06,795 --> 00:03:08,057 Tell him, Dimitri! 83 00:03:10,886 --> 00:03:12,453 [sniffs] Have you been drinking, sir? 84 00:03:12,453 --> 00:03:14,063 That's just ma booch! 85 00:03:14,063 --> 00:03:16,935 I drink six highly fermented kombuchas each morning 86 00:03:16,935 --> 00:03:18,850 to keep my microbiome balanced. 87 00:03:18,850 --> 00:03:20,417 - [stomach growls] - Ooo! 88 00:03:20,417 --> 00:03:22,854 The bad bacteria's getting the upper hand. 89 00:03:22,854 --> 00:03:24,029 - Let me just get a swig. - [cuffs click] 90 00:03:24,029 --> 00:03:26,075 [both grunting] 91 00:03:28,860 --> 00:03:31,123 You can't touch me! I outrank you! 92 00:03:31,123 --> 00:03:33,735 - [Taser crackles] - Catch me, Dimitri! 93 00:03:33,735 --> 00:03:35,650 - [Taser crackling] - [grumbling] 94 00:03:35,650 --> 00:03:39,262 ♪ 95 00:03:39,262 --> 00:03:41,917 Stanford Leonard Smith, you have been charged with-- 96 00:03:41,917 --> 00:03:43,614 Oh. One sec. I'm feeling a rumble. 97 00:03:43,614 --> 00:03:44,876 Booch me, Francine! 98 00:03:45,877 --> 00:03:47,227 [glass shatters] 99 00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:48,445 Order! 100 00:03:48,445 --> 00:03:50,665 Stan Smith, I am sentencing you 101 00:03:50,665 --> 00:03:53,755 to 50 hours of community service. 102 00:03:53,755 --> 00:03:56,410 What? First, a police officer tells me what to do... 103 00:03:56,410 --> 00:03:57,933 and now a judge? 104 00:03:57,933 --> 00:03:59,369 Your assignment 105 00:03:59,369 --> 00:04:01,893 is to clean the outhouses at the rodeo. 106 00:04:01,893 --> 00:04:03,112 No! 107 00:04:03,112 --> 00:04:04,853 You don't have to freak out, 108 00:04:04,853 --> 00:04:06,420 I'm not married to the whole rodeo thing. 109 00:04:06,420 --> 00:04:07,725 What you got? 110 00:04:07,725 --> 00:04:09,771 Umm... 111 00:04:09,771 --> 00:04:12,600 there's a Girl Scout troop I could help with. 112 00:04:12,600 --> 00:04:16,343 Mmmm! Mama likey! 113 00:04:16,343 --> 00:04:18,910 Okay. Adjourned! Booch me! 114 00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:22,262 People think judges are so mean, 115 00:04:22,262 --> 00:04:25,003 but all you have to do is catch them after lunch. 116 00:04:25,134 --> 00:04:27,702 ♪ 117 00:04:27,702 --> 00:04:29,617 Dad, I'm so excited you're finally 118 00:04:29,617 --> 00:04:31,314 doing Girl Scouts with me! 119 00:04:31,314 --> 00:04:32,881 Okay, let me introduce you to our troop. 120 00:04:32,881 --> 00:04:34,709 - This is Lissy. - Whatever. 121 00:04:34,709 --> 00:04:36,493 - Dana. - Not gonna remember that. 122 00:04:36,493 --> 00:04:38,060 I'm not here to make friends. 123 00:04:38,060 --> 00:04:40,105 I'm here to not clean outhouses. 124 00:04:40,105 --> 00:04:43,326 I'll be napping for a week while you do dumb girly stuff. 125 00:04:43,326 --> 00:04:46,460 Dad, Girl Scouts isn't all what you call "girly stuff." 126 00:04:46,460 --> 00:04:49,593 We do empowering things like camping, archery-- 127 00:04:49,593 --> 00:04:50,725 People or targets? 128 00:04:50,725 --> 00:04:52,117 Well, targets of course. 129 00:04:52,117 --> 00:04:53,293 Snooze! 130 00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:55,860 Plus robotics and engineering. 131 00:04:55,860 --> 00:04:58,341 Lissy, why don't you show new Troop Leader Smith your robot? 132 00:04:59,647 --> 00:05:01,126 [beep, whirring] 133 00:05:01,126 --> 00:05:05,000 [electronic dance music plays] 134 00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:07,437 Meh. It's no Johnny 5. 135 00:05:07,437 --> 00:05:09,396 We're rehearsing our skit for the jamboree. 136 00:05:09,396 --> 00:05:10,788 Do you want to see it before your nap? 137 00:05:10,788 --> 00:05:13,530 Look, little birdie, this here is not my scene. 138 00:05:13,530 --> 00:05:15,576 So you can tweet-tweet all you want to. 139 00:05:15,576 --> 00:05:18,796 I'm still gonna sleep-sleep all I want to. 140 00:05:20,798 --> 00:05:22,887 [snoring] 141 00:05:25,803 --> 00:05:28,371 [bell rings] 142 00:05:28,371 --> 00:05:30,373 [sniffs] 143 00:05:30,373 --> 00:05:33,289 Steve, did you shower after gym? 144 00:05:33,289 --> 00:05:36,553 No, my trick is to sneak in after the final bell 145 00:05:36,553 --> 00:05:38,250 and shower when it's empty. 146 00:05:38,250 --> 00:05:42,080 A luxurious rub-a-dub-dub. 147 00:05:42,080 --> 00:05:46,215 ♪ Clean Steve will smell real nice♪ 148 00:05:46,215 --> 00:05:48,391 ♪ Clean Steve♪ 149 00:05:48,391 --> 00:05:50,611 ♪ Preventing lice♪ 150 00:05:50,611 --> 00:05:52,526 Thank you for helping with our possum problem 151 00:05:52,526 --> 00:05:54,266 in the locker room. 152 00:05:54,266 --> 00:05:57,792 I can't believe we found so many all-female exterminators 153 00:05:57,792 --> 00:06:00,447 and on Bring Your Teenage Daughter To Work Day. 154 00:06:00,447 --> 00:06:02,274 - [shower running] - Hold on. 155 00:06:02,274 --> 00:06:04,102 Sounds like one of those possums 156 00:06:04,102 --> 00:06:05,974 is doing a little rub-a-dub-dub. 157 00:06:06,975 --> 00:06:08,498 Oh, my God! 158 00:06:08,498 --> 00:06:10,108 [laughter] 159 00:06:14,069 --> 00:06:16,419 Drink it in, ladies. 160 00:06:16,419 --> 00:06:18,465 STEVE [thinking]: Oof. More rough stuff. 161 00:06:18,465 --> 00:06:21,032 Time for a trip to Camelot. 162 00:06:21,032 --> 00:06:22,512 ♪ 163 00:06:22,512 --> 00:06:24,645 [chicken clucking] 164 00:06:24,645 --> 00:06:26,386 What? 165 00:06:26,386 --> 00:06:28,126 I-I'm so sorry this is last-minute, 166 00:06:28,126 --> 00:06:29,867 but can you clean Merlin's robe? 167 00:06:29,867 --> 00:06:33,349 No! We close at 4:30! 168 00:06:33,349 --> 00:06:35,656 But Merlin needs the robe today! 169 00:06:35,656 --> 00:06:38,136 4:30 is Miller time! 170 00:06:38,136 --> 00:06:39,921 It's when I meet the miller down at the inn 171 00:06:39,921 --> 00:06:41,749 and get drunk on Coors Light! 172 00:06:41,749 --> 00:06:44,316 ♪ 173 00:06:44,316 --> 00:06:46,188 Coors Light? 174 00:06:46,188 --> 00:06:48,146 [applause] 175 00:06:50,497 --> 00:06:52,673 Here's an opportunity for you to support the girls, 176 00:06:52,673 --> 00:06:54,936 and you are just sleeping through it again! 177 00:06:54,936 --> 00:06:57,199 [sighs] I'm glad this is your last day. 178 00:06:57,199 --> 00:06:58,635 Shh. 179 00:06:58,635 --> 00:07:03,031 I was waiting and waiting, and I hear a knock... 180 00:07:03,031 --> 00:07:06,077 a knock, a knock on the door! 181 00:07:06,077 --> 00:07:07,644 But it was my mom. 182 00:07:07,644 --> 00:07:09,341 [chuckles] 183 00:07:09,341 --> 00:07:12,997 I was washing the dishes and reading the newspaper 184 00:07:12,997 --> 00:07:17,262 when I hear a knock, a knock, a knock on the door. 185 00:07:17,262 --> 00:07:20,004 But it was... the mailman. 186 00:07:20,004 --> 00:07:21,919 [laughing] 187 00:07:21,919 --> 00:07:25,314 I opened the door, it was... 188 00:07:25,314 --> 00:07:27,490 Cecelia and Tanya! 189 00:07:27,490 --> 00:07:28,883 [applause] 190 00:07:28,883 --> 00:07:31,886 [laughs] What? Oh, my God! 191 00:07:31,886 --> 00:07:34,889 It was four girls the whole time! 192 00:07:34,889 --> 00:07:37,413 I thought it was just two girls, but it was four! 193 00:07:37,413 --> 00:07:39,633 Did you know? How are you sitting? 194 00:07:39,633 --> 00:07:41,461 Rise! 195 00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:44,246 Congratulations on participating. 196 00:07:44,246 --> 00:07:46,857 What? They didn't take first? 197 00:07:46,857 --> 00:07:49,207 Oh, I get it. You're saying girls can't be funny. 198 00:07:49,207 --> 00:07:50,687 Dad, be quiet! 199 00:07:50,687 --> 00:07:53,864 Now you're telling me what to do? 200 00:07:53,864 --> 00:07:56,911 I-I'm making a... connection. 201 00:07:56,911 --> 00:08:01,393 [grunting] 202 00:08:01,393 --> 00:08:03,961 - [applause] - I got it! 203 00:08:03,961 --> 00:08:07,965 Girls are told by society what they can and can't do! 204 00:08:07,965 --> 00:08:11,621 Just like I was told I couldn't crash into the flagpole! 205 00:08:11,621 --> 00:08:13,841 Hayley, have you ever stopped to consider 206 00:08:13,841 --> 00:08:16,017 what it would be like to live as a woman? 207 00:08:16,017 --> 00:08:17,322 The challenges they face? 208 00:08:17,322 --> 00:08:18,759 Dad, that's what I-- 209 00:08:18,759 --> 00:08:20,717 Not now! The stars are coming. 210 00:08:20,717 --> 00:08:23,851 Even though I completed my 50 hours of service, 211 00:08:23,851 --> 00:08:25,461 I'm going to stick around 212 00:08:25,461 --> 00:08:27,594 and do everything I can to help my girls. 213 00:08:27,594 --> 00:08:28,595 Your girls? 214 00:08:28,595 --> 00:08:29,770 Yes. 215 00:08:31,249 --> 00:08:33,425 - GIRLS: Mmm! - Yes. 216 00:08:34,339 --> 00:08:36,907 ♪ 217 00:08:36,907 --> 00:08:39,431 I know that being a man and leading this troop 218 00:08:39,431 --> 00:08:43,087 of future She-EOs is intrinsically problematic. 219 00:08:43,087 --> 00:08:45,916 So I'm not here to talk. I'm here to listen. 220 00:08:45,916 --> 00:08:47,439 - Hayley? - Today we're going to finish up 221 00:08:47,439 --> 00:08:49,311 - our keepsake pillows, take-- - One second. 222 00:08:49,311 --> 00:08:50,921 I don't want to interrupt because I know men 223 00:08:50,921 --> 00:08:53,141 tend to interrupt, but eww! 224 00:08:53,141 --> 00:08:55,709 Ugh! Making pillows? 225 00:08:55,709 --> 00:08:58,973 These girls shouldn't be sewing pillows like homemakers. 226 00:08:58,973 --> 00:09:01,541 They should be making pills, like scientists! 227 00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:04,239 The biggest pills the world has ever seen, 228 00:09:04,239 --> 00:09:07,634 pills the size of pillows that kill the craziest diseases. 229 00:09:07,634 --> 00:09:10,593 Girls, if you didn't have Hayley's glass ceiling 230 00:09:10,593 --> 00:09:12,160 in your way, what would you do? 231 00:09:12,160 --> 00:09:14,597 Mmmm! Pony camp? 232 00:09:14,597 --> 00:09:15,772 Pony camp! 233 00:09:15,772 --> 00:09:17,382 - Wow! - That sounds fun! 234 00:09:17,382 --> 00:09:20,472 No! Ponies are still small horses! 235 00:09:20,472 --> 00:09:21,561 You need to think big! 236 00:09:23,171 --> 00:09:25,042 I would go to the National Girl Scouts 237 00:09:25,042 --> 00:09:27,392 Robotics Convention in Baraboo, Wisconsin, 238 00:09:27,392 --> 00:09:29,220 and compete for the Golden Beret! 239 00:09:29,220 --> 00:09:31,396 Holy [bleep] That's it! 240 00:09:31,396 --> 00:09:33,094 I don't know what it is, but it's it! 241 00:09:33,094 --> 00:09:36,227 Whoa, whoa! I think we're getting ahead of ourselves. 242 00:09:36,227 --> 00:09:38,186 Hayley, are you mansplaining to me? 243 00:09:38,186 --> 00:09:40,884 - Women can't mansplain. - Wow. 244 00:09:40,884 --> 00:09:43,887 You got a whole long list of things women can't do. 245 00:09:43,887 --> 00:09:46,629 Girls, we are going to go to that convention, 246 00:09:46,629 --> 00:09:48,500 we are going to win that Beret, 247 00:09:48,500 --> 00:09:50,024 and I'm gonna look great in it! 248 00:09:50,024 --> 00:09:51,591 [girls cheer] 249 00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:53,418 I get it. 250 00:09:53,418 --> 00:09:56,639 But we don't even have enough money to make dues right now. 251 00:09:56,639 --> 00:09:58,989 Maybe if we bring in enough from cookie sales? 252 00:09:58,989 --> 00:10:00,817 - Cookies? - Girl Scout cookies. 253 00:10:00,817 --> 00:10:03,124 Your big idea is cookies? 254 00:10:03,124 --> 00:10:06,257 Oh, like little Susie Homemaker baking for the boys. 255 00:10:06,257 --> 00:10:07,824 Why don't we just put them in skirts, Hayley? 256 00:10:07,824 --> 00:10:09,086 That's what we do. 257 00:10:09,086 --> 00:10:10,740 Oh, my God! 258 00:10:11,785 --> 00:10:14,309 If we're going to make money, we need to saturate the market 259 00:10:14,309 --> 00:10:16,441 with something that shatters gender norms. 260 00:10:16,441 --> 00:10:19,009 That sketch proved your strong suit is legs. 261 00:10:19,009 --> 00:10:20,794 What other legs are there? 262 00:10:20,794 --> 00:10:25,059 Crab legs, spider legs, piano legs, turkey legs. 263 00:10:25,059 --> 00:10:26,713 Turkey legs? 264 00:10:26,713 --> 00:10:28,018 [laughter] 265 00:10:28,018 --> 00:10:29,716 Yes! That's it! 266 00:10:29,716 --> 00:10:32,849 Turkey legs! Great big ones you get at the fair! 267 00:10:32,849 --> 00:10:35,243 That idea gets my approving laughter as well! 268 00:10:35,243 --> 00:10:37,245 Ha ha ha ha! 269 00:10:37,245 --> 00:10:40,509 ♪ Mmm, I said, I took it and I ran for it♪ 270 00:10:40,509 --> 00:10:42,511 ♪ I won it then I stand on it♪ 271 00:10:42,511 --> 00:10:44,556 ♪ Money on the floor when we dance on it♪ 272 00:10:44,556 --> 00:10:46,341 ♪ Shine bright, finna put a tan on it♪ 273 00:10:46,341 --> 00:10:48,082 ♪ I'm a bitch, I'm a boss♪ 274 00:10:48,082 --> 00:10:50,084 ♪ I'm a bitch and a boss, I'm-a shine like gloss♪ 275 00:10:50,084 --> 00:10:53,217 ♪ I'm a bitch, I'm a boss, I'm a bitch and a boss...♪ 276 00:10:53,217 --> 00:10:55,089 We're not basting fast enough! 277 00:10:55,089 --> 00:10:57,961 Don't worry, Troop Leader Smith! I built something to help. 278 00:10:57,961 --> 00:10:59,833 Lissy, you're a genius! 279 00:10:59,833 --> 00:11:02,226 This will make production twice as fast. 280 00:11:02,226 --> 00:11:03,880 Could we let the arm do the turkey killing 281 00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:05,926 so we don't have to? 282 00:11:05,926 --> 00:11:08,668 No. Hand strangling is a big part of our brand. 283 00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:11,540 ♪ [trilling] Aah! Aah!♪ 284 00:11:11,540 --> 00:11:14,412 ♪ Aaaah!♪ 285 00:11:14,412 --> 00:11:16,197 ♪ I'm a boss, I'm a bitch♪ 286 00:11:16,197 --> 00:11:19,026 ♪ I'm a bitch, I'm a boss, I'm a bitch and a boss♪ 287 00:11:19,026 --> 00:11:21,202 ♪ I'm a bitch and a boss, I'm-a shine like gloss♪ 288 00:11:21,202 --> 00:11:22,943 ♪ I'm a bitch, I'm a boss♪ 289 00:11:22,943 --> 00:11:24,858 ♪ I'm a bitch and a boss, I'm-a shine like gloss♪ 290 00:11:24,858 --> 00:11:26,903 ♪ I'm a bitch, I'm a boss♪ 291 00:11:26,903 --> 00:11:28,905 ♪ I'm a bitch and a boss, I'm-a shine like gloss♪ 292 00:11:28,905 --> 00:11:31,647 -♪ I'm a bitch, I'm a boss♪ - [turkey gobbles] 293 00:11:31,647 --> 00:11:33,475 That was a disaster! 294 00:11:33,475 --> 00:11:35,825 We didn't even sell a single leg! 295 00:11:35,825 --> 00:11:38,567 You just kept handing money back and forth with one customer! 296 00:11:38,567 --> 00:11:40,221 Yeah, I'm afraid what happened there 297 00:11:40,221 --> 00:11:42,179 was a classic quick-change scam. 298 00:11:42,179 --> 00:11:43,964 He took me for 1,600 dollars. 299 00:11:43,964 --> 00:11:46,096 [horn honks, metal scraping] 300 00:11:46,096 --> 00:11:47,837 Only one person is rich enough 301 00:11:47,837 --> 00:11:49,839 to drive that close to buildings. 302 00:11:49,839 --> 00:11:51,798 Filibuster Q. Jorgenson! 303 00:11:51,798 --> 00:11:54,104 The carwash magnate of Langley! 304 00:11:54,104 --> 00:11:55,976 And he's here to make a deal! 305 00:11:55,976 --> 00:11:58,326 You wanna buy all the turkey legs. 306 00:11:58,326 --> 00:12:01,329 No. The legs are disgusting. 307 00:12:01,329 --> 00:12:03,113 But the boys down on the docks 308 00:12:03,113 --> 00:12:06,116 say that you've got an arm, a robot arm. 309 00:12:06,116 --> 00:12:07,770 I want to buy the patent. 310 00:12:07,770 --> 00:12:10,512 And I'm in the mood to spend a lot of money on it. 311 00:12:10,512 --> 00:12:12,296 Can you pay me in LazerCoin? 312 00:12:12,296 --> 00:12:14,908 It's a highly volatile cryptocurrency. Can't lose. 313 00:12:14,908 --> 00:12:17,693 - O-kay... - Deal! 314 00:12:17,693 --> 00:12:19,608 We're going to Baraboo! 315 00:12:19,608 --> 00:12:21,915 - Baraboo! - Yay, yay 316 00:12:21,915 --> 00:12:25,048 I'm-a keep that "boo" going for our hater-in-chief Hayley! 317 00:12:25,048 --> 00:12:27,398 Boo! 318 00:12:27,398 --> 00:12:30,010 ♪ 319 00:12:30,010 --> 00:12:32,795 MERTZ: This is for exposing yourself to my aunt! 320 00:12:32,795 --> 00:12:34,492 She worked so hard to become 321 00:12:34,492 --> 00:12:36,625 the family's first female exterminator! 322 00:12:36,625 --> 00:12:39,193 She's a trailblazer! 323 00:12:39,193 --> 00:12:42,762 ♪ 324 00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:45,765 It's working! Oh, no, no, no, no! 325 00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:47,810 These were iron-ons? 326 00:12:47,810 --> 00:12:50,552 Wow, I expected more from a robe made by... 327 00:12:50,552 --> 00:12:52,162 H? 328 00:12:52,162 --> 00:12:53,685 Ugh! 329 00:12:55,383 --> 00:12:57,167 You want me to hack into the troop's 330 00:12:57,167 --> 00:12:59,822 LazerCoin account and drain the funds. 331 00:12:59,822 --> 00:13:01,868 - Why? - So that Dad 332 00:13:01,868 --> 00:13:04,044 will look like a failure and leave the troop in shame. 333 00:13:04,044 --> 00:13:06,829 - But won't that hurt the girls? - Only at first. 334 00:13:06,829 --> 00:13:09,049 It'll be way worse if Dad takes them 335 00:13:09,049 --> 00:13:11,268 all the way to Nationals and humiliates them. 336 00:13:11,268 --> 00:13:13,880 May I articulate a theme here? 337 00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:16,099 Are you sure you're not jealous of the girls? 338 00:13:16,099 --> 00:13:18,449 Stan has been showing them the love and support 339 00:13:18,449 --> 00:13:20,974 you never received when you were a Girl Scout. 340 00:13:20,974 --> 00:13:24,020 Perhaps this is why you feel the need to sabotage them. 341 00:13:24,020 --> 00:13:28,155 That's ridiculous! I'm doing this for those little bitches! 342 00:13:28,155 --> 00:13:29,852 Well, let's get Jurgen to hack them. 343 00:13:29,852 --> 00:13:32,246 I don't know anything about computers. 344 00:13:32,246 --> 00:13:34,857 ♪ 345 00:13:34,857 --> 00:13:36,554 [girls sobbing] 346 00:13:36,554 --> 00:13:38,556 Oh, noooo. 347 00:13:38,556 --> 00:13:41,298 Did you lose all your LazerCoin money? 348 00:13:41,298 --> 00:13:43,997 No, we're crying because you... 349 00:13:43,997 --> 00:13:45,868 betrayed us. 350 00:13:45,868 --> 00:13:48,523 Lissy here just earned her hacking badge. 351 00:13:48,523 --> 00:13:51,743 She hack-blocked your hack and traced it back to you. 352 00:13:51,743 --> 00:13:56,487 You are banished from Troop 7307! 353 00:13:56,487 --> 00:13:57,924 Wh-a-a-at? 354 00:13:57,924 --> 00:13:59,621 I said... 355 00:13:59,621 --> 00:14:01,492 ♪ You're dead to us!♪ 356 00:14:01,492 --> 00:14:03,407 ♪ I said you're dead to us!♪ 357 00:14:03,407 --> 00:14:05,061 ♪ We hope you die♪ 358 00:14:05,061 --> 00:14:07,368 ♪ Don't come back or show your face to us♪ 359 00:14:07,368 --> 00:14:09,022 ♪ We hope you die♪ 360 00:14:09,022 --> 00:14:11,328 ♪ Don't come back or show your face to us♪ 361 00:14:11,328 --> 00:14:13,243 - Oh, yeah! - Oh, yeah! 362 00:14:13,243 --> 00:14:15,158 - Uh-huh! - Uh-huh! 363 00:14:15,158 --> 00:14:17,291 - One more time! - One more time! 364 00:14:17,291 --> 00:14:19,423 - Quiet style! - Quiet style! 365 00:14:19,423 --> 00:14:21,861 [hushed] ♪ Hayley's dead to us♪ 366 00:14:23,166 --> 00:14:25,777 ♪ 367 00:14:25,777 --> 00:14:28,302 Okay, if we're going to win the Golden Beret, 368 00:14:28,302 --> 00:14:30,347 we need to make our robot deadly. 369 00:14:30,347 --> 00:14:32,784 - Or useful! - Useful for killing? 370 00:14:32,784 --> 00:14:34,351 How about a robot that cleans up? 371 00:14:34,351 --> 00:14:36,745 The bodies of your enemies. 372 00:14:36,745 --> 00:14:38,573 No. Like your house. 373 00:14:38,573 --> 00:14:40,401 - [fingers snap] - Like a Roomba! 374 00:14:40,401 --> 00:14:43,360 Well, why didn't you just say that, Lissy? 375 00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:45,580 But what's the problem with Roombas? 376 00:14:45,580 --> 00:14:48,235 They can't get over door jambs, no kill features. 377 00:14:48,235 --> 00:14:50,715 We're gonna fix that with this troop's bread and butter-- 378 00:14:50,715 --> 00:14:52,152 legs! 379 00:14:54,981 --> 00:14:57,113 Has someone been using my basketball? 380 00:14:57,113 --> 00:14:59,115 Because I heard the distinct sound 381 00:14:59,115 --> 00:15:01,248 of someone dribbling my basketball. 382 00:15:01,248 --> 00:15:03,163 We haven't touched your basketball! 383 00:15:03,163 --> 00:15:05,208 Well, don't. 384 00:15:05,208 --> 00:15:06,906 What's this nerd scribble? 385 00:15:06,906 --> 00:15:09,299 That's the robot we're designing for Nationals. 386 00:15:09,299 --> 00:15:12,476 [mocking] "Ehhh! That's the robot! Ehhh." 387 00:15:12,476 --> 00:15:14,000 Get a life, Lissy. 388 00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:16,480 You wanna build something? Build a boyfriend. 389 00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:19,266 Back off my girls, Hayley! 390 00:15:19,266 --> 00:15:21,311 Your girls? Hah! 391 00:15:21,311 --> 00:15:22,878 You may have gotten lucky, Dad, 392 00:15:22,878 --> 00:15:25,272 but the tables are about to turn. 393 00:15:27,100 --> 00:15:29,754 What's wrong with Hayley? Is she going through menopause? 394 00:15:29,754 --> 00:15:31,539 Or did she get her first period? 395 00:15:31,539 --> 00:15:33,628 She's probably mad you were never into Girl Scouts 396 00:15:33,628 --> 00:15:34,672 when she did it. 397 00:15:34,672 --> 00:15:36,457 Hayley was a Girl Scout? 398 00:15:36,457 --> 00:15:40,461 ♪ 399 00:15:40,461 --> 00:15:43,681 [whirring] 400 00:15:43,681 --> 00:15:45,335 No competition in sight. 401 00:15:45,335 --> 00:15:48,034 The Golden Beret is pretty much ours. 402 00:15:48,034 --> 00:15:49,209 [choir vocalizes] 403 00:15:49,209 --> 00:15:51,037 Her Majesty! 404 00:15:53,343 --> 00:15:57,826 We have a late entry. Troop 1622! 405 00:15:59,001 --> 00:16:02,004 Troop 1622, present for competition. 406 00:16:02,004 --> 00:16:03,440 What the hell are you doing here? 407 00:16:03,440 --> 00:16:05,051 Where'd you get that bot? 408 00:16:05,051 --> 00:16:07,314 Roger, did you have sex with a robot maker? 409 00:16:07,314 --> 00:16:10,578 I'm like eight years old, you sick [bleep] 410 00:16:10,578 --> 00:16:13,320 ANNOUNCER: Robots to the competition ring! 411 00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:15,235 [whirring] 412 00:16:15,235 --> 00:16:17,541 ♪ 413 00:16:17,541 --> 00:16:18,629 [beep] 414 00:16:18,629 --> 00:16:21,632 ♪ 415 00:16:21,632 --> 00:16:23,025 [all gasp] 416 00:16:23,025 --> 00:16:25,680 [whirring] 417 00:16:25,680 --> 00:16:27,464 [gun cocks] 418 00:16:27,464 --> 00:16:29,249 - [whirring stops] - [sobs] 419 00:16:29,249 --> 00:16:37,213 ♪ 420 00:16:37,213 --> 00:16:39,041 [all gasp] 421 00:16:39,041 --> 00:16:43,872 Dammit. Mr. Belvedere himself couldn't do it better. 422 00:16:43,872 --> 00:16:47,615 The world is facing disconnect due to globalization. 423 00:16:47,615 --> 00:16:50,618 How would you foster a greater sense of oneness? 424 00:16:50,618 --> 00:16:52,576 BUTLER BOT: [sweetly] Hate turns to anger. 425 00:16:52,576 --> 00:16:54,578 Anger leads to fear. 426 00:16:54,578 --> 00:16:56,972 Fear leads to suffering. 427 00:16:56,972 --> 00:16:59,148 [cheers and applause] 428 00:16:59,148 --> 00:17:01,324 Come on! She's gotta be cheating! 429 00:17:01,324 --> 00:17:03,283 There's probably a parrot in there! 430 00:17:03,283 --> 00:17:06,112 Spider Bot, same question. 431 00:17:06,112 --> 00:17:07,939 SPIDER BOT: [distorted] Destroy dust! 432 00:17:07,939 --> 00:17:09,811 Annihilate grime! 433 00:17:09,811 --> 00:17:12,901 [cheers and applause] 434 00:17:12,901 --> 00:17:15,512 ♪ 435 00:17:15,512 --> 00:17:17,732 What's alarming about Steve's case is that 436 00:17:17,732 --> 00:17:20,952 even in his fantasies he remains under extreme duress. 437 00:17:20,952 --> 00:17:23,085 We may need to think about medication 438 00:17:23,085 --> 00:17:26,001 and even institutionalization. 439 00:17:26,001 --> 00:17:28,917 Do you understand what that means, Steve? 440 00:17:28,917 --> 00:17:30,179 Steve? 441 00:17:30,179 --> 00:17:31,920 ♪ 442 00:17:31,920 --> 00:17:33,530 I can't believe I found a seamstress 443 00:17:33,530 --> 00:17:35,663 who could remake the robe in time! 444 00:17:35,663 --> 00:17:38,448 [gasps] Oh, no! These are the wrong moons! 445 00:17:38,448 --> 00:17:41,582 These are waning! Merlin only wears waxing! 446 00:17:41,582 --> 00:17:45,151 It's over! I'm done! He's gonna turn me into a newt! 447 00:17:45,151 --> 00:17:47,762 MERLIN: Steve. I've come for my robe. 448 00:17:49,416 --> 00:17:51,461 Looks great! Thanks, Steve. 449 00:17:51,461 --> 00:17:55,204 [sighs] I can't believe he didn't notice. 450 00:17:55,204 --> 00:17:57,685 What a day it's been in the life of Merlin... 451 00:17:57,685 --> 00:17:59,643 ziz secretary. 452 00:17:59,643 --> 00:18:01,906 Oh, and, Steve, what's the ETA on that salad? 453 00:18:01,906 --> 00:18:03,038 Salad? 454 00:18:03,038 --> 00:18:05,214 My... salad? 455 00:18:05,214 --> 00:18:10,045 The salad! The salad! The salad!! 456 00:18:10,045 --> 00:18:13,092 A salad does sound good. 457 00:18:13,092 --> 00:18:14,658 There's a new salad place across the street. 458 00:18:14,658 --> 00:18:16,007 Great! 459 00:18:16,007 --> 00:18:18,749 They even give you a free piece of pita bread. 460 00:18:18,749 --> 00:18:21,100 Finally, a good therapist! 461 00:18:22,231 --> 00:18:24,929 And the Golden Beret goes to... 462 00:18:24,929 --> 00:18:26,540 [drumroll] 463 00:18:26,540 --> 00:18:30,979 ...Troop 7307 and the Spider Bot! 464 00:18:30,979 --> 00:18:32,807 - [cheers and applause] - Yeah ha ha! 465 00:18:32,807 --> 00:18:34,765 Dana! Come here. 466 00:18:34,765 --> 00:18:36,637 Tanya! Where's Lissy? 467 00:18:36,637 --> 00:18:39,770 Dad! We won the Golden Beret with my invention! 468 00:18:39,770 --> 00:18:42,556 Not now, Lissy. I'm ordering socks online. 469 00:18:42,556 --> 00:18:44,253 [beep] 470 00:18:44,253 --> 00:18:46,951 What? How could he not care? 471 00:18:46,951 --> 00:18:50,259 How could he ignore his amazing, gifted daughter? 472 00:18:50,259 --> 00:18:51,739 Oh, my God. 473 00:18:51,739 --> 00:18:55,395 I-- I'm making a connection... 474 00:18:55,395 --> 00:18:57,701 [grunting] 475 00:18:57,701 --> 00:18:59,964 ♪ 476 00:18:59,964 --> 00:19:01,531 [grunting] 477 00:19:01,531 --> 00:19:05,535 ♪ 478 00:19:05,535 --> 00:19:07,755 Close enough. 479 00:19:07,755 --> 00:19:10,018 I have something to say that I should have said 480 00:19:10,018 --> 00:19:12,020 a long time ago. 481 00:19:12,020 --> 00:19:14,196 Hayley, I never gave you the support 482 00:19:14,196 --> 00:19:15,893 and encouragement you deserve. 483 00:19:17,025 --> 00:19:18,461 You're a great kid. 484 00:19:20,028 --> 00:19:22,683 Troop 7307 forfeits. 485 00:19:24,163 --> 00:19:26,687 This award belongs to you, Hayley. 486 00:19:26,687 --> 00:19:28,036 Thanks, Dad. 487 00:19:28,036 --> 00:19:31,648 ♪ 488 00:19:31,648 --> 00:19:33,737 That's not yours to give away! 489 00:19:33,737 --> 00:19:36,044 Lissy, look, someday you'll understand 490 00:19:36,044 --> 00:19:37,263 when you have a daughter. 491 00:19:37,263 --> 00:19:38,699 Or your dad will understand 492 00:19:38,699 --> 00:19:40,483 when he goes through an adventure like mine. 493 00:19:40,483 --> 00:19:43,399 Spider Bot, activate kill mode. 494 00:19:43,399 --> 00:19:45,488 [whirring] 495 00:19:45,488 --> 00:19:47,142 [screeching] 496 00:19:47,142 --> 00:19:49,231 [sweetly] She gave it a kill mode. 497 00:19:49,231 --> 00:19:51,146 Protect us, Butler Bot! 498 00:19:51,146 --> 00:19:52,887 [parrot squawking] 499 00:19:52,887 --> 00:19:56,673 ♪ 500 00:19:56,673 --> 00:19:57,935 [snarling] 501 00:19:57,935 --> 00:20:02,113 ♪ 502 00:20:02,113 --> 00:20:03,941 [snarling] 503 00:20:03,941 --> 00:20:06,422 [whirring] 504 00:20:06,422 --> 00:20:09,469 Hayley, aim for the small square on its undercarriage! 505 00:20:09,469 --> 00:20:11,079 That's its weak spot! 506 00:20:11,079 --> 00:20:12,776 Why would you make a weak spot? 507 00:20:12,776 --> 00:20:14,561 It was gonna be a frozen-yogurt dispenser, 508 00:20:14,561 --> 00:20:17,128 but Lissy overpromised again and ran out of time. 509 00:20:21,176 --> 00:20:24,179 I can't do it! You take the shot. You're the weapons expert! 510 00:20:24,179 --> 00:20:25,963 But you're the Scout. 511 00:20:25,963 --> 00:20:27,661 I believe in you, Hayley. 512 00:20:29,750 --> 00:20:31,621 - [clang] - Ahh! 513 00:20:31,621 --> 00:20:34,711 LISSY: Deactivate kill mode! 514 00:20:34,711 --> 00:20:35,930 It's not even worth it. 515 00:20:35,930 --> 00:20:37,453 [whirring, thud] 516 00:20:37,453 --> 00:20:39,281 Come on, Spider Bot. Let's go home. 517 00:20:42,719 --> 00:20:44,591 You want me to pull that out? 518 00:20:44,591 --> 00:20:47,333 [straining] Probably not. It might be keeping me alive. 519 00:20:47,333 --> 00:20:49,422 Whew, man! I haven't run that fast 520 00:20:49,422 --> 00:20:51,380 since I ran track in high school. 521 00:20:51,380 --> 00:20:53,861 You ran track in high school? 522 00:20:53,861 --> 00:20:56,298 ♪ 523 00:20:56,298 --> 00:20:58,213 Bye! Have a beautiful time!