1 00:00:01,044 --> 00:00:06,702 ♪ 2 00:00:06,702 --> 00:00:10,010 Face it, Franny, you've got a brown thumb... 3 00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:12,403 and not the sexy kind. 4 00:00:12,403 --> 00:00:14,840 I can't even raise a tomato. 5 00:00:14,840 --> 00:00:17,452 What if I wanted to raise children someday? 6 00:00:17,452 --> 00:00:18,714 MAN: Having trouble growing a garden? 7 00:00:18,714 --> 00:00:20,281 Try a single plant. 8 00:00:20,281 --> 00:00:21,630 Wait, who said that? 9 00:00:21,630 --> 00:00:24,198 I did. Paul Rudd. 10 00:00:24,198 --> 00:00:26,200 On behalf of Ye Ol' Farmers' Almanac. 11 00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:28,289 Oh, my Instagram was open. 12 00:00:28,289 --> 00:00:30,030 If you're like me, you've tried 13 00:00:30,030 --> 00:00:32,075 all the fad gardening kits to no avail. 14 00:00:32,075 --> 00:00:34,208 Now try the one that works, 15 00:00:34,208 --> 00:00:36,253 the Ye Ol' Farmers' Almanac-- 16 00:00:36,253 --> 00:00:38,908 a dense book filled with vague instructions 17 00:00:38,908 --> 00:00:41,215 based off the position of the moon. 18 00:00:41,215 --> 00:00:43,434 And you know it works because it's me telling you. 19 00:00:43,434 --> 00:00:45,262 Paul Rudd. 20 00:00:45,262 --> 00:00:47,264 And I'm not a liar, I'm an actor. 21 00:00:47,264 --> 00:00:49,223 Watch, now I'll act sad. 22 00:00:51,094 --> 00:00:54,663 ♪ 23 00:00:54,663 --> 00:00:57,318 ♪ Hard times are real 24 00:00:57,318 --> 00:01:01,322 ♪ There's dusty fields no matter where you go ♪ 25 00:01:01,322 --> 00:01:04,020 ♪ 26 00:01:04,020 --> 00:01:06,805 ♪ You may change your mind 27 00:01:06,805 --> 00:01:10,983 ♪ 'Cause the weeds are high where corn don't grow ♪ 28 00:01:10,983 --> 00:01:14,074 [thunder booms] 29 00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:16,598 ♪ You may change your mind 30 00:01:16,598 --> 00:01:20,123 ♪ 'Cause the weeds are high where corn don't grow ♪ 31 00:01:20,123 --> 00:01:24,780 ♪ 32 00:01:24,780 --> 00:01:27,435 I have mastered nature! 33 00:01:27,435 --> 00:01:29,741 I am stronger than God! 34 00:01:30,873 --> 00:01:33,789 ♪ 35 00:01:33,789 --> 00:01:36,357 ♪ Good morning, U.S.A. 36 00:01:36,357 --> 00:01:40,143 ♪ I got a feelin' that it's gonna be a wonderful day ♪ 37 00:01:40,143 --> 00:01:43,277 ♪ The sun in the sky has a smile on his face ♪ 38 00:01:43,277 --> 00:01:47,237 ♪ And he's shinin' a salute to the American race ♪ 39 00:01:49,370 --> 00:01:52,895 ♪ Oh, boy, it's swell to say 40 00:01:52,895 --> 00:01:55,158 - ♪ Good-- - ♪ Good morning, U.S.A. 41 00:01:55,158 --> 00:01:56,028 Aah! 42 00:01:57,726 --> 00:02:00,946 ♪ Good morning, U.S.A. 43 00:02:00,946 --> 00:02:03,471 ♪ 44 00:02:03,471 --> 00:02:05,212 You see Bev-D's latest post? 45 00:02:05,212 --> 00:02:07,562 Another out-of-focus photo of scallops? 46 00:02:07,562 --> 00:02:10,173 [chuckles] Man, that woman loves scallops. 47 00:02:10,173 --> 00:02:12,871 And I love that she's still sticking with that hairstyle. 48 00:02:12,871 --> 00:02:14,482 I mean it's basically the Rachel! 49 00:02:14,482 --> 00:02:16,092 [both laughing] 50 00:02:16,092 --> 00:02:17,224 Who are you guys talking about? 51 00:02:17,224 --> 00:02:18,877 Bev DiVincenzo. 52 00:02:18,877 --> 00:02:20,531 Best social media follow in the game. 53 00:02:20,531 --> 00:02:22,359 What makes her so great? 54 00:02:22,359 --> 00:02:24,883 She's a normal, sad person, but she posts 55 00:02:24,883 --> 00:02:26,668 constantly with the confidence of someone 56 00:02:26,668 --> 00:02:28,800 that has an actually interesting life. 57 00:02:28,800 --> 00:02:31,716 Her life is so mundane and yet so specific... 58 00:02:31,716 --> 00:02:32,978 it draws you in. 59 00:02:32,978 --> 00:02:34,719 She lives in Altoona, PA. 60 00:02:34,719 --> 00:02:36,939 She works out at a non-judgmental gym. 61 00:02:36,939 --> 00:02:38,332 She loves her Jeep Wrangler. 62 00:02:38,332 --> 00:02:40,116 She has a boyfriend named Irv. 63 00:02:40,116 --> 00:02:42,553 Every Cinco de Mayo, she posts a photo of her famous wet, 64 00:02:42,553 --> 00:02:44,555 watery homemade salsa. 65 00:02:44,555 --> 00:02:46,992 And her favorite nights are when she's alone on her back patio 66 00:02:46,992 --> 00:02:48,690 with a cold bottle of Diet Coke 67 00:02:48,690 --> 00:02:51,040 and the Pittsburgh Pirates playing on her iPad. 68 00:02:51,040 --> 00:02:53,825 Oh! She just started using the term YOLO. 69 00:02:53,825 --> 00:02:56,480 It's her new "sister from another mister." 70 00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:57,742 If you guys love her so much, 71 00:02:57,742 --> 00:02:59,353 why don't you go see her in real life? 72 00:02:59,353 --> 00:03:01,355 Altoona is only three hours away. 73 00:03:01,355 --> 00:03:04,009 Hmm. Premium content. 74 00:03:04,009 --> 00:03:06,229 I wouldn't be missed at work. Bullock's using again. 75 00:03:06,229 --> 00:03:08,100 She would be easy to find. 76 00:03:08,100 --> 00:03:10,233 Are you two really thinking of driving three hours 77 00:03:10,233 --> 00:03:12,975 to stalk a total stranger from Facebook?! 78 00:03:12,975 --> 00:03:14,759 That settles it. We're doing it. 79 00:03:14,759 --> 00:03:15,891 Come on, Hayley! 80 00:03:15,891 --> 00:03:16,848 Yes! 81 00:03:18,067 --> 00:03:19,634 They both have diarrhea? 82 00:03:19,634 --> 00:03:20,852 Check it out-- 83 00:03:20,852 --> 00:03:22,506 the first veggie from my garden! 84 00:03:22,506 --> 00:03:23,681 Nice, Mom! 85 00:03:23,681 --> 00:03:26,118 Jesus, man. Calm down. 86 00:03:26,118 --> 00:03:28,382 I'm going to make restaurant-quality food 87 00:03:28,382 --> 00:03:30,732 with them-- like they do at restaurants. 88 00:03:30,732 --> 00:03:34,605 I know a great recipe for truly authentic Louisiana jambalaya 89 00:03:34,605 --> 00:03:36,825 I learned from a blind bayou man. 90 00:03:36,825 --> 00:03:39,697 It was back in the 80's during Mardi Gras... 91 00:03:39,697 --> 00:03:42,657 I'd been drinking for 9 or 10 hours with no luck 92 00:03:42,657 --> 00:03:44,920 when a girl flashed "F-me" eyes 93 00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:47,052 right as she walked out the back door. 94 00:03:47,052 --> 00:03:49,664 ♪ 95 00:03:49,664 --> 00:03:51,927 I followed her down the alley and then for miles... 96 00:03:51,927 --> 00:03:54,669 all the way out to the bayou. 97 00:03:54,669 --> 00:03:56,671 It was only there I realized... 98 00:03:56,671 --> 00:03:58,586 she was a raccoon. 99 00:03:58,586 --> 00:04:00,675 [raccoon growling] 100 00:04:00,675 --> 00:04:04,026 A male raccoon, and he had led me into a trap. 101 00:04:04,026 --> 00:04:05,984 I was a goner. 102 00:04:05,984 --> 00:04:09,640 But then out of nowhere a blind bayou man saved me! 103 00:04:09,640 --> 00:04:12,077 He took me back to his shack and prepared me 104 00:04:12,077 --> 00:04:14,036 life-nourishing jambalaya, 105 00:04:14,036 --> 00:04:16,081 teaching me the recipe along the way. 106 00:04:16,081 --> 00:04:19,084 Hold up, you were trying to bone a raccoon? 107 00:04:19,084 --> 00:04:20,303 Is-- Is that what you're saying? 108 00:04:20,303 --> 00:04:21,652 Steve, you're totally missing 109 00:04:21,652 --> 00:04:23,785 one of the two points of my story. 110 00:04:23,785 --> 00:04:26,396 I know how to make truly authentic jambalaya 111 00:04:26,396 --> 00:04:28,746 as taught to me by a blind bayou man! 112 00:04:28,746 --> 00:04:29,921 Count me out! 113 00:04:29,921 --> 00:04:31,532 I'm on a deadline. 114 00:04:31,532 --> 00:04:33,577 I didn't know you had a new project, Klaus. 115 00:04:33,577 --> 00:04:37,364 Yeah, I'm writing a new blockbuster movie for John Cena, 116 00:04:37,364 --> 00:04:39,409 but I only have four days to do it. 117 00:04:39,409 --> 00:04:40,976 That's when he has a book signing 118 00:04:40,976 --> 00:04:42,760 at the Langley Book Hole. 119 00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:44,632 I'm going to present him with the script 120 00:04:44,632 --> 00:04:46,373 and convince him to be in it. 121 00:04:46,373 --> 00:04:48,070 I love John Cena! 122 00:04:48,070 --> 00:04:49,550 I didn't know he was an author. 123 00:04:49,550 --> 00:04:51,856 Oh, yeah, great author. 124 00:04:51,856 --> 00:04:53,945 I'm actually slowly working my way 125 00:04:53,945 --> 00:04:57,340 through his new one right now because I don't want it to end! 126 00:04:57,340 --> 00:05:00,169 Well, [bleep] jambalaya. Can I help with your script? 127 00:05:00,169 --> 00:05:01,953 Are you serious?! 128 00:05:01,953 --> 00:05:03,433 I was a huge fan of the porno 129 00:05:03,433 --> 00:05:05,435 you and Roger wrote back in Season 4. 130 00:05:05,435 --> 00:05:06,871 All right! 131 00:05:06,871 --> 00:05:08,786 You're getting in at the right time too, 132 00:05:08,786 --> 00:05:11,180 I'm at the top of page one. 133 00:05:11,180 --> 00:05:15,010 Well, I'm glad you're excited to cook my veggies, Roger! 134 00:05:15,010 --> 00:05:17,360 Only problem is I'm having a little trouble 135 00:05:17,360 --> 00:05:18,970 remembering that recipe. 136 00:05:18,970 --> 00:05:21,364 Well, I was originally thinking of cooking-- 137 00:05:21,364 --> 00:05:22,974 I know how I can remember! 138 00:05:22,974 --> 00:05:25,237 You know how in college if you go to class drunk 139 00:05:25,237 --> 00:05:27,370 and then take the final drunk you remember everything 140 00:05:27,370 --> 00:05:29,241 - and ace it? - No. 141 00:05:29,241 --> 00:05:32,201 I just have to get back to that exact same drunk headspace 142 00:05:32,201 --> 00:05:34,638 I was in in that bayou in '86. 143 00:05:34,638 --> 00:05:37,162 Honestly, Roger, if-- if you can't remember-- 144 00:05:37,162 --> 00:05:39,208 No, no, I can get there. 145 00:05:39,208 --> 00:05:40,644 [Bottles shatter, blender whirs] 146 00:05:40,644 --> 00:05:41,776 [gulps] 147 00:05:42,994 --> 00:05:45,257 Do you remember the recipe?! 148 00:05:45,257 --> 00:05:46,650 - [urine splattering] - Roger, you're pissing 149 00:05:46,650 --> 00:05:47,695 in my colander. 150 00:05:50,393 --> 00:05:53,918 I can't believe we're in the same town as Bev DiVincenzo! 151 00:05:53,918 --> 00:05:55,572 There's Suzie's Meal Box! 152 00:05:55,572 --> 00:05:58,183 The best chicken Caesar salad in the world! 153 00:05:58,183 --> 00:05:59,924 There's her non-judgmental gym! 154 00:05:59,924 --> 00:06:01,448 Oh, my God, it's Bev! It's Bev! 155 00:06:01,448 --> 00:06:08,455 ♪ 156 00:06:08,455 --> 00:06:09,934 [crashing] 157 00:06:09,934 --> 00:06:11,893 [hissing] 158 00:06:13,460 --> 00:06:14,722 FRANCINE: Roger! 159 00:06:14,722 --> 00:06:16,941 [birds chirping] 160 00:06:16,941 --> 00:06:19,422 Roger! You destroyed my garden! 161 00:06:19,422 --> 00:06:21,685 [vomits] 162 00:06:21,685 --> 00:06:24,949 [gasps] I remember the jambalaya recipe! 163 00:06:27,212 --> 00:06:30,607 In walks the lead, Brevin Docent... 164 00:06:30,607 --> 00:06:33,088 Whoa! Sick name! 165 00:06:33,088 --> 00:06:36,526 We gotta give him a deep character. 166 00:06:36,526 --> 00:06:40,922 Women want to sleep with him and guys wanna sleep with him. 167 00:06:40,922 --> 00:06:42,532 Yes. 168 00:06:42,532 --> 00:06:45,883 His ass looks hard but also soft. 169 00:06:45,883 --> 00:06:50,018 His eyes are two rhinestones in a bowl of heavy cream. 170 00:06:50,018 --> 00:06:52,020 He's a guy you want to have a beer with, 171 00:06:52,020 --> 00:06:53,935 but when he's having a beer... 172 00:06:53,935 --> 00:06:56,328 he's doing nuclear physics in a notebook. 173 00:06:56,328 --> 00:06:58,069 Yes! 174 00:06:58,069 --> 00:07:00,332 He fosters sick cats and makes girls climax 175 00:07:00,332 --> 00:07:02,334 like 18 times a night! 176 00:07:02,334 --> 00:07:04,119 Klaus! 177 00:07:04,119 --> 00:07:07,078 This is really good. 178 00:07:09,472 --> 00:07:11,256 Oh, my God, Francine there you are! 179 00:07:11,256 --> 00:07:12,823 I figured it all out-- 180 00:07:12,823 --> 00:07:15,043 how we can raise funds to fix your garden. 181 00:07:15,043 --> 00:07:17,219 I wasn't really worried about the money part. 182 00:07:17,219 --> 00:07:19,482 The answer was right in front of us the whole time! 183 00:07:19,482 --> 00:07:21,441 Jambalaya! 184 00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:23,355 We'll use a portion of the profits from the restaurant 185 00:07:23,355 --> 00:07:24,400 to fix your garden! 186 00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:25,967 What restaurant?! 187 00:07:25,967 --> 00:07:28,273 The jambalaya restaurant! 188 00:07:28,273 --> 00:07:30,798 That's what all the veggies and seafood are for, silly! 189 00:07:32,060 --> 00:07:33,757 - I don't wanna-- - Holy crap! 190 00:07:33,757 --> 00:07:35,411 Look what was in the shrimp! 191 00:07:35,411 --> 00:07:37,282 It's a frozen alligator! 192 00:07:37,282 --> 00:07:40,677 I wonder if it was frozen alive like Encino Man? 193 00:07:40,677 --> 00:07:43,767 What if this is an Encino Man situation, Francine? 194 00:07:43,767 --> 00:07:44,986 We better defrost it. 195 00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:48,119 [doorbell dings] 196 00:07:48,119 --> 00:07:50,470 I think that's the new front of the restaurant! 197 00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:52,254 New what of the huh? 198 00:07:52,254 --> 00:07:55,170 [crane humming] 199 00:07:55,170 --> 00:07:57,825 You order the old bayou porch? 200 00:07:57,825 --> 00:07:59,609 Where you want it? 201 00:08:00,784 --> 00:08:03,526 [thud] 202 00:08:03,526 --> 00:08:06,007 That'll work. Right? 203 00:08:06,007 --> 00:08:08,052 Roger, that's where my garden was! 204 00:08:08,052 --> 00:08:09,140 She had a garden. 205 00:08:09,140 --> 00:08:10,925 Now we have a restaurant! 206 00:08:13,144 --> 00:08:15,582 Oh, my God! He's alive! 207 00:08:15,582 --> 00:08:16,887 I'm gonna name him Julius! 208 00:08:16,887 --> 00:08:18,498 Doesn't he look like a Julius? 209 00:08:18,498 --> 00:08:19,977 I don't know, Roger. 210 00:08:19,977 --> 00:08:22,893 I don't know what a Julius looks like. 211 00:08:22,893 --> 00:08:24,939 All I can picture is a little Roman guy 212 00:08:24,939 --> 00:08:27,637 or a Philadelphia 76er. 213 00:08:30,379 --> 00:08:33,730 Roger, I don't want you running a restaurant out of the house! 214 00:08:33,730 --> 00:08:35,863 You're the one who wanted to open a restaurant. 215 00:08:35,863 --> 00:08:39,954 No. I said I wanted to make a "restaurant-quality" dish 216 00:08:39,954 --> 00:08:41,869 with vegetables from my garden. 217 00:08:41,869 --> 00:08:44,611 Oh, my God, enough about your dumb garden! 218 00:08:44,611 --> 00:08:46,351 It was covered in throw-up! 219 00:08:46,351 --> 00:08:48,528 And anyway, it's too late because I sent Rogu 220 00:08:48,528 --> 00:08:50,094 to the wharf with a bunch of flyers, 221 00:08:50,094 --> 00:08:52,967 and his cute ass always pulls in business. 222 00:08:52,967 --> 00:08:55,360 So that's it? The house is now a restaurant?! 223 00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:57,580 Whoa! Francine! Your tone! 224 00:08:57,580 --> 00:08:59,321 It's upsetting Julius! 225 00:08:59,321 --> 00:09:01,628 God, he's soft. 226 00:09:01,628 --> 00:09:03,412 You should feel how soft he-- Aah! 227 00:09:03,412 --> 00:09:05,457 [chuckles] He keeps me quick. 228 00:09:05,457 --> 00:09:06,589 [smooches] 229 00:09:06,589 --> 00:09:08,373 Stan's going to kill us both 230 00:09:08,373 --> 00:09:11,072 if he comes back to a restaurant in his living room! 231 00:09:11,072 --> 00:09:14,075 You're always so worried about what Stan thinks. 232 00:09:14,075 --> 00:09:16,381 I'm starting to think you like him. 233 00:09:16,381 --> 00:09:18,296 Maybe even more than the restaurant. 234 00:09:18,296 --> 00:09:21,082 Much more! Because I don't like the restaurant at all! 235 00:09:21,082 --> 00:09:23,432 [gasps] And there it is. 236 00:09:23,432 --> 00:09:25,347 You were right, Julius. 237 00:09:25,347 --> 00:09:27,523 I hate to do this, but Julius and I have been talking 238 00:09:27,523 --> 00:09:30,091 and we don't think you're dedicated to the restaurant. 239 00:09:30,091 --> 00:09:31,832 I have to fire you. 240 00:09:31,832 --> 00:09:35,009 You are no longer an employee of Julius's Bayou Bistro. 241 00:09:35,009 --> 00:09:38,621 I was never an employee of Julius's Bayou Bistro! 242 00:09:38,621 --> 00:09:40,318 And that's a dumb name! 243 00:09:40,318 --> 00:09:42,016 [gasps] Too far! 244 00:09:42,016 --> 00:09:43,626 Just get your stuff and go. 245 00:09:43,626 --> 00:09:45,628 This is my stuff! 246 00:09:45,628 --> 00:09:48,631 This is all my stuff! 247 00:09:50,633 --> 00:09:51,634 [smooches] 248 00:09:51,634 --> 00:09:56,639 ♪ 249 00:09:56,639 --> 00:09:58,685 Where are we? 250 00:09:58,685 --> 00:10:01,209 Oh, my God. 251 00:10:01,209 --> 00:10:03,515 You guys had quite the crash. 252 00:10:03,515 --> 00:10:07,824 Lucky I was driving by. Local hospital's a bunch of dipshits. 253 00:10:07,824 --> 00:10:09,347 I'll get you back on your feet. 254 00:10:09,347 --> 00:10:11,088 I'm Bev DiVincenzo. 255 00:10:12,481 --> 00:10:14,265 I'm just glad you guys didn't die. 256 00:10:14,265 --> 00:10:15,310 You know what they say... 257 00:10:15,310 --> 00:10:16,703 YOLO. 258 00:10:21,098 --> 00:10:24,667 ♪ 259 00:10:24,667 --> 00:10:26,843 Rogu, everyone's ready and you haven't plated 260 00:10:26,843 --> 00:10:28,845 a single bowl of jambalaya?! 261 00:10:28,845 --> 00:10:31,282 Rogu in weeds. 262 00:10:31,282 --> 00:10:33,502 I'm starting to think all that restaurant experience 263 00:10:33,502 --> 00:10:35,112 on your application was a lie. 264 00:10:35,112 --> 00:10:38,072 You wrote Rogu résumé. 265 00:10:38,072 --> 00:10:39,551 You got me there. 266 00:10:39,551 --> 00:10:41,945 Well, at least we can count on Julius. 267 00:10:41,945 --> 00:10:44,861 Perfect. As always. 268 00:10:44,861 --> 00:10:46,689 Whoa! [chuckles] 269 00:10:46,689 --> 00:10:48,430 And as soon as Rogu is ready with the jambalaya-- 270 00:10:48,430 --> 00:10:50,040 Ready. 271 00:10:50,040 --> 00:10:53,217 Now I just don't know what to believe, Rogu. 272 00:10:53,217 --> 00:10:54,958 Showtime! 273 00:10:54,958 --> 00:10:59,789 ♪ Jambalaya 274 00:10:59,789 --> 00:11:01,051 ♪ If you want something good 275 00:11:01,051 --> 00:11:02,966 ♪ Eat as much as you can 276 00:11:02,966 --> 00:11:07,188 ♪ Jambalaya 277 00:11:07,188 --> 00:11:09,930 ♪ I learned this recipe from a little blind man ♪ 278 00:11:09,930 --> 00:11:12,628 And now it is my pleasure to introduce 279 00:11:12,628 --> 00:11:14,848 the beating heart of this restaurant. 280 00:11:14,848 --> 00:11:17,589 His name is on the front for a reason... 281 00:11:17,589 --> 00:11:19,374 Julius! 282 00:11:19,374 --> 00:11:22,116 'Scuse me. Sorry, did not rehearse this. 283 00:11:22,116 --> 00:11:23,334 - [thudding, clattering] - Whoa! [chuckles] 284 00:11:23,334 --> 00:11:24,684 Hope someone brought two figs in a coin-purse 285 00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:26,033 'cause that's what I just felt! 286 00:11:26,033 --> 00:11:28,992 - [glass shattering] - Ow, my shin! Oh, Jesus! 287 00:11:28,992 --> 00:11:31,212 That one stopped me dead in my tracks. 288 00:11:31,212 --> 00:11:32,866 Ah! 289 00:11:32,866 --> 00:11:35,782 Got it. Just give me a second. 290 00:11:35,782 --> 00:11:37,261 Okay, I'm good. 291 00:11:37,261 --> 00:11:39,176 Julius! 292 00:11:39,176 --> 00:11:40,656 [diners "awws"] 293 00:11:40,656 --> 00:11:42,789 And feel how soft he is! 294 00:11:42,789 --> 00:11:46,009 [Julius snapping, diners gasping] 295 00:11:46,009 --> 00:11:49,883 Yay! Three cheers for Julius and his great restaurant! 296 00:11:49,883 --> 00:11:51,885 - [cheering] - Hooray for Julius! 297 00:11:51,885 --> 00:11:55,279 That's the softest alligator I've ever felt. 298 00:11:55,279 --> 00:11:56,846 How much would you... 299 00:11:56,846 --> 00:11:58,500 sell him for? 300 00:11:58,500 --> 00:11:59,501 For Julius?! 301 00:11:59,501 --> 00:12:00,720 Never, creep! 302 00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:03,766 Everything has a price. 303 00:12:03,766 --> 00:12:08,162 I would be buying him for only good purposes, of course. 304 00:12:08,162 --> 00:12:10,207 Hm. 305 00:12:10,207 --> 00:12:12,122 Hey, you're a real weirdo. 306 00:12:12,122 --> 00:12:13,558 Outta here, buddy. 307 00:12:13,558 --> 00:12:15,604 If you change your mind, you can find me 308 00:12:15,604 --> 00:12:19,826 at the big, scary animal-wallet factory at the edge of town! 309 00:12:19,826 --> 00:12:21,436 - [door slams] - Now, who's ready 310 00:12:21,436 --> 00:12:23,394 for more jambalaya?! 311 00:12:23,394 --> 00:12:25,962 [cheering] 312 00:12:25,962 --> 00:12:28,312 Now who's ready for Avatar 2? 313 00:12:28,312 --> 00:12:30,140 [cheering] 314 00:12:30,140 --> 00:12:31,533 I can't hear you! 315 00:12:31,533 --> 00:12:34,623 This is James [bleep] Cameron! 316 00:12:34,623 --> 00:12:38,801 Just like always, all I wanted to do was cook my vegetables 317 00:12:38,801 --> 00:12:40,934 and now Roger's running a restaurant 318 00:12:40,934 --> 00:12:43,501 out of our living room with his new pet alligator-- 319 00:12:43,501 --> 00:12:45,155 Julius. 320 00:12:45,155 --> 00:12:47,984 God, I'd love to see Roger's face 321 00:12:47,984 --> 00:12:50,421 if something ever happened to stupid Julius. 322 00:12:50,421 --> 00:12:52,032 [gasps] That's it! 323 00:12:52,032 --> 00:12:54,208 I'm gonna make something happen to stupid Julius! 324 00:12:54,208 --> 00:12:56,253 Oh, my God, will you shut up?! 325 00:12:56,253 --> 00:12:58,342 You've been ranting for hours! 326 00:12:58,342 --> 00:13:01,084 I'm not stopping you from writing your dumb script, 327 00:13:01,084 --> 00:13:02,216 be my guest! 328 00:13:02,216 --> 00:13:05,132 Okay, Steve, it's the climax. 329 00:13:05,132 --> 00:13:06,742 The bad guys still have the kid. 330 00:13:08,700 --> 00:13:10,790 What if the hero skydives in? 331 00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:14,532 The bad guys, stunned by how beautiful and cool Brevin Docent 332 00:13:14,532 --> 00:13:17,579 played by John Cena is, simply stand there... 333 00:13:17,579 --> 00:13:20,060 and he mows them all down with a machine gun. 334 00:13:20,060 --> 00:13:21,975 Holy cow... 335 00:13:21,975 --> 00:13:23,846 They just stare at him as he shoots them? 336 00:13:23,846 --> 00:13:24,934 That's stupid. 337 00:13:24,934 --> 00:13:26,675 Get her out of here! 338 00:13:26,675 --> 00:13:29,373 - Mom! - Fine, whatever. 339 00:13:29,373 --> 00:13:30,461 This room sucks! 340 00:13:30,461 --> 00:13:32,072 Your story sucks! 341 00:13:32,072 --> 00:13:34,857 She's a hater, Steve! She's a hater! 342 00:13:34,857 --> 00:13:36,728 [door slams] 343 00:13:36,728 --> 00:13:39,470 But... what if she's right? 344 00:13:39,470 --> 00:13:42,343 ♪ 345 00:13:42,343 --> 00:13:45,128 Well, sounds like you'll be playing basketball again 346 00:13:45,128 --> 00:13:45,999 in no time. 347 00:13:47,914 --> 00:13:49,524 Hey! What are you doing telling Bev 348 00:13:49,524 --> 00:13:50,830 your legs are feeling better? 349 00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:51,918 They are. Why wouldn't I? 350 00:13:51,918 --> 00:13:53,267 Because as soon as we're okay, 351 00:13:53,267 --> 00:13:54,877 Bev will kick us out. 352 00:13:54,877 --> 00:13:56,400 And we can't leave until we witness 353 00:13:56,400 --> 00:13:58,620 her vacuum pack her winter clothes. 354 00:13:58,620 --> 00:13:59,839 Your legs are okay? 355 00:14:04,713 --> 00:14:06,149 Don't ruin this for me. 356 00:14:06,149 --> 00:14:07,847 Hey, Bev, you wouldn't happen 357 00:14:07,847 --> 00:14:10,327 to have any homemade salsa, would you? 358 00:14:10,327 --> 00:14:12,852 No, I only make that on Cinco de Mayo. 359 00:14:15,028 --> 00:14:17,769 But... I guess I could make some now. 360 00:14:19,249 --> 00:14:21,686 Also, I was thinking maybe a little fresh air 361 00:14:21,686 --> 00:14:22,992 would do us good. 362 00:14:22,992 --> 00:14:24,733 I see you have a patio. 363 00:14:24,733 --> 00:14:26,039 Yeah, we can sit out there tonight. 364 00:14:27,692 --> 00:14:32,219 Oh, darn, I was hoping to watch the Pirates game. 365 00:14:32,219 --> 00:14:34,699 You guys didn't tell me you were Pirates fans! 366 00:14:34,699 --> 00:14:36,440 I have an iPad we can watch it on. 367 00:14:38,268 --> 00:14:40,444 [clapping] 368 00:14:40,444 --> 00:14:42,446 [indistinct conversations] 369 00:14:42,446 --> 00:14:45,014 ♪ Jambalaya, whoa 370 00:14:45,014 --> 00:14:46,711 ♪ Look at that hot guy-a ♪ 371 00:14:46,711 --> 00:14:48,191 Now it's time to meet 372 00:14:48,191 --> 00:14:50,324 the beating heart of this restaurant. 373 00:14:50,324 --> 00:14:52,892 His name is on the front for a reason... 374 00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:54,110 Julius! 375 00:14:59,028 --> 00:15:00,508 - Feel how soft he-- - [splash] 376 00:15:00,508 --> 00:15:01,944 What the hell? 377 00:15:03,163 --> 00:15:05,948 Jambalaya? But where's Julius? 378 00:15:05,948 --> 00:15:08,472 Someone knock out Rogu. 379 00:15:08,472 --> 00:15:10,866 Almost die. 380 00:15:10,866 --> 00:15:12,563 Julius has been stolen! 381 00:15:14,435 --> 00:15:16,524 It's printing! We should have just enough time 382 00:15:16,524 --> 00:15:17,960 to get to the bookstore! 383 00:15:17,960 --> 00:15:19,570 So did you guys change your ending? 384 00:15:19,570 --> 00:15:21,572 I swear to God, Francine-- 385 00:15:21,572 --> 00:15:22,617 Somebody took Julius! 386 00:15:22,617 --> 00:15:24,271 Julius is missing! 387 00:15:24,271 --> 00:15:26,838 Yo, bro, you got soup on our script! 388 00:15:26,838 --> 00:15:29,624 Soup on your script?! Julius is missing! 389 00:15:29,624 --> 00:15:32,453 Now maybe you know what it feels like 390 00:15:32,453 --> 00:15:34,890 when someone takes something you care about. 391 00:15:34,890 --> 00:15:37,414 Francine, did you have something to do 392 00:15:37,414 --> 00:15:38,981 with Julius's disappearance? 393 00:15:38,981 --> 00:15:40,461 - Yes! - [gasps] 394 00:15:40,461 --> 00:15:42,811 I was gonna throw him in Greg's pool, 395 00:15:42,811 --> 00:15:45,118 but luckily a creepy guy lurking in our bushes 396 00:15:45,118 --> 00:15:47,555 - offered to do it for me. - Oh, no! 397 00:15:47,555 --> 00:15:49,774 He's connected to that animal-wallet factory! 398 00:15:49,774 --> 00:15:52,081 Animal-wallet factory? 399 00:15:52,081 --> 00:15:55,519 Can you guys please take this anywhere else?! 400 00:15:55,519 --> 00:15:58,044 Where would an animal even put their wallet? 401 00:15:58,044 --> 00:16:00,089 I mean, a kangaroo I understand. 402 00:16:00,481 --> 00:16:03,092 ♪ 403 00:16:03,092 --> 00:16:04,746 FRANCINE: Ohh. 404 00:16:04,746 --> 00:16:06,008 Oh, no! 405 00:16:06,008 --> 00:16:07,792 You gotta believe me, Roger. 406 00:16:07,792 --> 00:16:10,534 I didn't know I was putting Julius in danger. 407 00:16:10,534 --> 00:16:12,275 Just forget it, Francine. 408 00:16:12,275 --> 00:16:14,016 All I want right now is to walk into that building 409 00:16:14,016 --> 00:16:16,845 and walk out with Julius safely intact... 410 00:16:16,845 --> 00:16:18,978 and a brand-new wallet made from an animal 411 00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:21,023 I have no emotional attachments to. 412 00:16:21,023 --> 00:16:22,720 Like a famous show dog or something. 413 00:16:22,720 --> 00:16:23,591 I don't know. Come on. 414 00:16:25,201 --> 00:16:27,421 [shuddering] Ohohoho. 415 00:16:27,421 --> 00:16:30,815 He's so soft. 416 00:16:30,815 --> 00:16:32,382 Skin him. 417 00:16:33,688 --> 00:16:35,211 No! 418 00:16:35,211 --> 00:16:37,344 Get them! 419 00:16:37,344 --> 00:16:38,867 We need a plan! 420 00:16:38,867 --> 00:16:39,999 I meant to bring that up in the car. 421 00:16:42,044 --> 00:16:44,612 ♪ 422 00:16:44,612 --> 00:16:48,355 In that moment, Elbow Grease realized it would take more 423 00:16:48,355 --> 00:16:51,575 than all-wheel drive to get over the bridge. 424 00:16:51,575 --> 00:16:53,055 It would take love. 425 00:16:53,055 --> 00:16:55,536 Wait, he writes children's books? 426 00:16:55,536 --> 00:16:57,842 Didn't you say you were slowly working your way through one? 427 00:16:57,842 --> 00:16:59,931 They're good books! 428 00:16:59,931 --> 00:17:02,499 The main guy is a determined truck! 429 00:17:02,499 --> 00:17:05,459 Hell yeah! That's a book, bro! 430 00:17:05,459 --> 00:17:07,548 [chuckles] That's a book! 431 00:17:07,548 --> 00:17:09,463 Come on. We have a script to sell. 432 00:17:09,463 --> 00:17:13,075 And act tough. John Cena can smell fear. 433 00:17:13,075 --> 00:17:15,686 ♪ 434 00:17:15,686 --> 00:17:18,080 Hey, you need to be careful. 435 00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:20,126 Bev seemed a little unsettled when you asked her 436 00:17:20,126 --> 00:17:22,519 to make the macaroni salad she made for her aunt's funeral. 437 00:17:22,519 --> 00:17:26,001 I said "would make for an aunt's funeral." 438 00:17:26,001 --> 00:17:28,917 All right, a little mac salad. 439 00:17:28,917 --> 00:17:30,484 How bad my Pirates losing? 440 00:17:30,484 --> 00:17:33,139 Excellent, also any chance we can get a little more 441 00:17:33,139 --> 00:17:35,228 of this amazing, wet, watery salsa? 442 00:17:35,228 --> 00:17:37,230 Sure. 443 00:17:37,230 --> 00:17:39,058 I need to go in and call my boyfriend Irv, anyway. 444 00:17:41,060 --> 00:17:42,365 [both groan] 445 00:17:42,365 --> 00:17:43,714 Irv... 446 00:17:43,714 --> 00:17:44,889 She's too good for Irv. 447 00:17:44,889 --> 00:17:46,848 She should date that guy from her office. 448 00:17:46,848 --> 00:17:49,111 The one she gives the big donut to every year on his birthday. 449 00:17:49,111 --> 00:17:50,678 - Mark Matthews? - Mark Matthews! 450 00:17:50,678 --> 00:17:52,288 Her work husband! 451 00:17:52,288 --> 00:17:54,160 She's always posting about how it's not sexual, 452 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:55,900 but I think they could get there. 453 00:17:55,900 --> 00:17:58,860 How do you know Mark Matthews? What's going on? 454 00:17:58,860 --> 00:18:01,254 You guys have been saying lots of weird stuff. 455 00:18:07,129 --> 00:18:10,306 We'll always love you! Please don't block us! 456 00:18:10,306 --> 00:18:12,961 ♪ 457 00:18:12,961 --> 00:18:15,833 So you figured out we were making drugs. 458 00:18:15,833 --> 00:18:19,228 What?! No, honestly, we were just here for Julius! 459 00:18:19,228 --> 00:18:22,318 So you aren't here to take down my huge cocaine operation? 460 00:18:23,667 --> 00:18:26,235 FRANCINE: Wow, that's a ton of cocaine. 461 00:18:26,235 --> 00:18:27,889 Well, now you've definitely seen it, 462 00:18:27,889 --> 00:18:30,544 so I still have to kill you. 463 00:18:30,544 --> 00:18:35,157 It's funny, I was just saying I bet the only thing softer 464 00:18:35,157 --> 00:18:38,813 than an alligator wallet would be a human one. 465 00:18:38,813 --> 00:18:40,815 And now I get to find out. 466 00:18:40,815 --> 00:18:43,774 ♪ 467 00:18:43,774 --> 00:18:46,299 If you had just let me cook my vegetables, 468 00:18:46,299 --> 00:18:48,083 none of this would be happening. 469 00:18:48,083 --> 00:18:50,085 But then we never would've met Julius. 470 00:18:50,085 --> 00:18:51,826 Wouldn't you rather die with Julius 471 00:18:51,826 --> 00:18:53,958 - than have never met him? - No! 472 00:18:55,438 --> 00:18:58,311 Aah! Julius look away! 473 00:18:58,311 --> 00:19:00,748 What the hell is that? 474 00:19:00,748 --> 00:19:02,967 ♪ 475 00:19:02,967 --> 00:19:04,882 [shudders] Whoa. 476 00:19:04,882 --> 00:19:07,798 His eyes are like two rhinestones... 477 00:19:07,798 --> 00:19:10,758 In a bowl of heavy cream! 478 00:19:10,758 --> 00:19:13,152 ♪ 479 00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:14,196 - Aah! - Aah! 480 00:19:14,196 --> 00:19:15,458 - Ugh! - Oh! 481 00:19:15,458 --> 00:19:18,244 [men grunting] 482 00:19:18,244 --> 00:19:21,203 ♪ 483 00:19:21,203 --> 00:19:24,380 Whoo! Who thinks this is stupid now, Francine? 484 00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:29,080 How'd you get John Cena to save us? 485 00:19:29,080 --> 00:19:31,213 He saw the jambalaya stain on our script 486 00:19:31,213 --> 00:19:32,693 and asked how it happened! 487 00:19:32,693 --> 00:19:34,608 Oh, when Stu and Klaude told me 488 00:19:34,608 --> 00:19:37,045 you had a missing alligator, I had to help. 489 00:19:37,045 --> 00:19:39,265 See, I once had a pet alligator. 490 00:19:39,265 --> 00:19:42,659 Well, actually... he was more of a best friend. 491 00:19:42,659 --> 00:19:45,009 But I lost him while scouting a shrimp factory 492 00:19:45,009 --> 00:19:46,968 for a new Elbow Grease book. 493 00:19:46,968 --> 00:19:48,404 Wait... 494 00:19:48,404 --> 00:19:49,797 Julius?! 495 00:19:49,797 --> 00:19:51,842 [Julius squawks] 496 00:19:51,842 --> 00:19:54,802 [laughs] It really is you! 497 00:19:54,802 --> 00:19:57,848 Wait a second. He was your alligator?! 498 00:19:57,848 --> 00:20:00,242 And we both named him Julius? 499 00:20:00,242 --> 00:20:04,464 [laughs] I guess he does just look like a Julius. 500 00:20:04,464 --> 00:20:07,336 God, I miss Julius! 501 00:20:07,336 --> 00:20:11,079 Man, it really hurts when you lose something you care about. 502 00:20:11,079 --> 00:20:13,081 It's almost like you and your garden. 503 00:20:13,081 --> 00:20:16,040 Actually, it's exactly like that. 504 00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:19,435 Francine, I think I just learned a lesson. 505 00:20:19,435 --> 00:20:21,568 I know I learned one. Trying to... 506 00:20:21,568 --> 00:20:25,354 Oh, look! The trailer for Julius and John Cena's new movie is up! 507 00:20:25,354 --> 00:20:28,488 They stole the idea from Steve and Klaus. Isn't that funny? 508 00:20:28,488 --> 00:20:30,141 ANNOUNCER: He's a nuclear physicist 509 00:20:30,141 --> 00:20:31,926 you'd wanna get a beer with... 510 00:20:31,926 --> 00:20:35,538 and he's an alligator you wanna have sex with. 511 00:20:35,538 --> 00:20:39,281 And together they're bad news for the bad guys. 512 00:20:39,281 --> 00:20:42,197 This fall, John Cena is Brevin Docent... 513 00:20:42,197 --> 00:20:45,287 and introducing Julius as... Julius. 514 00:20:45,287 --> 00:20:48,203 Two geniuses from different genuses. 515 00:20:48,203 --> 00:20:52,076 You're gonna wanna [bleep] this dude and this alligator! 516 00:20:52,076 --> 00:20:53,774 [gunshots] 517 00:20:53,774 --> 00:20:55,993 Directed by James [bleep] Cameron. 518 00:20:55,993 --> 00:20:57,865 Bye! Have a beautiful time!