Hello.
Gus Taylor is a young man, but he's already experienced more challenges Hello.
Gus Taylor is a young man, but he's already experienced more challenges
than most people face in a lifetime.
His single-minded love of rockclimbing
has delivered him both wonderful highs and devastating lows,
but the sport's given him something to hold on to
but the sport's at times when he's felt lost.
(LABOURED BREATHING)
Funny thing, climbing, like, I mean, hate it and love it.
It's given me everything and it's taken...
..taken a lot away.
Oh, Jesus.
95% of the time you're failing.
That's the point.
(GRUNTS)
(STRAINS)
It's focusing on what you can try differently next time that matters.
Trying to turn mistakes into something much better.
Turning mistakes into gold.
MAN: If you tell him how strong he is,
you know, he'll shrug it off and tell me to shut up.
Poor old Gus, he's been through a lot. you know, he'll shrug it off and tell me to shut up.
Poor old Gus, he's been through a lot.
No-one deserves what he's been through.
He kind of blames everything that's happened on himself,
which is entirely untrue. that's happened on himself,
which is entirely untrue.
never convince him of that.
But you can never convince him of that.
NEWSREADER: Breaking news for you,
a rockclimbing accident in the Blue Mountains.
REPORTER: He was rockclimbing with a friend off Sublime Point Road
when he was struck...
Where I was was not a healthy headspace.
I didn't feel like I deserved to be, to be around.
Self-forgiveness is, um...
..that's the end goal.
MAN: He was always a climber.
When he was a kid he just...he'd walk along the top of a timber fence MAN: He was always a climber.
When he was a kid he just...he'd walk along the top of a timber fence
and just balance along the top of the fence.
You know, at four or five years old.
Before climbing, music was definitely my first obsession.
Dad was in a band.
And when he quit that, we landed in Parkes,
And when he quit that, you know, small country town.
Both my daughter Chelsea and Angus wouldn't talk to me.
They were really cranky with me because,
They were really cranky with me why did I take them from Sydney,
away from all their friends, and all that.
I think Dad was worried that,
you know, it wasn't working out sort of thing.
I came home one day and there was a drum kit in the house.
I came home one day and Yeah. My eyes lit up.
RYAN: We were so excited.
You know, just a few blokes from Parkes
started playing music together in high school,
and all of a sudden we got this fancy label from Sydney,
this fancy studio, wanting to record our music.
That's pretty much the birth story of Bears With Guns.
Things just really started to snowball.
Things just really started Crowds got bigger and bigger,
and then we ended up doing a couple of national tours.
It was such a good ride. It was so much fun.
WOMAN: I met Gus in my first year of my music degree,
and I went to a few of his gigs, and we ended up hanging out a lot, WOMAN: I met Gus in my first year of my music degree,
and I went to a few of his gigs, and we ended up hanging out a lot,
and then we were obsessed with each other very quickly.
It was amazing. Like, I was head over heels.
We were together for about five years before I proposed.
The wedding was brilliant.
And everything was, you know, rainbows and unicorns really.
But I think, you know, we were young. We were young.
I developed a fairly brutal case of bulimia,
which led to some really strange thought patterns and choices.
I ended up at a point getting suddenly quite a bit of attention
from a third person, and we did eventually end up having a kiss.
from a third person, and we did Didn't go any further than that,
contrary to popular belief, that was...
But there was absolutely an emotional component going on.
It hit me like a ton of bricks, basically.
For some reason, I just couldn't... I couldn't move past it.
I split with Rosie, and I made the call to leave the band,
which was certainly hard news to break to my best mates.
But, yeah, I needed to find north on the compass again.
I have said that I married a drummer and divorced a climber
I have said that I married because by the time we were done,
I mean particularly because by the time we were done,
I mean particularly after we broke up,
he really dove into climbing a lot.
I had a job in a climbing shop.
Every weekend was getting in the car I had a job in a climbing shop.
Every weekend was getting in the car and just climbing.
Every weekend was getting in the car And it sounds ridiculous saying this,
but I needed something to hold on to.
That's it. Come on.
Good to see you.
MAN: Angus is Good to see you.
MAN: Angus is an insanely good climber.
I'm not saying he makes it look easy,
but he kind of makes it look easy sometimes.
And there's a, both, like, an intensity but he kind of makes it look easy sometimes.
And there's a, both, like, an intensity
and this, like, calmness.
So in 2016, I moved up here to the Blue Mountains.
On a Saturday morning I'd be like, "I'm in paradise." So in 2016, I moved up here to the Blue Mountains.
On a Saturday morning I'd be like, "I'm in paradise."
My climbing really sort of went in leaps and bounds.
I started dreaming about going somewhere in the world
and just doing nothing but climbing every single day,
which is where the US trip came into focus.
There's this crack-climbing mecca there called Indian Creek.
It's like this-size crack from bottom to top
It's like this-size crack in a straight line.
It's just remarkable.
And so I saved up all my money, headed over to the US,
and just spent eight weeks being an absolute dirt bag.
MAN: Going up there. Fuck, yeah.
That dirt bag life
is something widely revered amongst climbers. That dirt bag life
is something widely revered amongst climbers.
Just hit the road and dedicate everything to climbing.
Old tagline.
I'm gonna walk around and then do Monster Tower.
You can see he's stoked from here.
That's what we're going up.
Yeah, Gus.
We decided to go to a place called Joshua Tree,
very much one of the birthplaces of hard climbing in the US.
And one of these boulders really sort of struck me.
The White Rastafarian, which is a five-metre-tall boulder
The White Rastafarian, somewhere in that vicinity.
Gus would have a go, and then I'd go,
and I'd go one move higher than him,
and then he'd go one move higher than me.
Got to a point where I said, "You know what?
"That's...that's enough for me for today."
We decided that I would stand off to the side and take photos.
I just had this gut feeling.
It just wasn't...wasn't good.
But am I just scared because I'm scared?
Or is there a good reason to be scared?
Angus' fall was very much out of control.
Angus' fall It took me a couple of seconds
to realise that the screams I was hearing from Angus
to realise that the screams weren't frustration,
they were pain, fear, injury.
My leg was spaghetti.
I was in a lot of pain.
The bones had completely shattered.
They'd come out of my leg.
Once Angus made it back to Australia,
Once Angus it was heartbreaking.
One day he'd get good news saying
that, "Hey, it looks like your bones are fusing again."
And then a week later
they'd say, "Oh, no, actually, sorry. It's not.
"We're going to have to do another surgery."
MAN: 11 operations in three years.
Major, major reconstructive efforts to save his leg.
You know, taking bone graft from his femur, Major, major reconstructive efforts to save his leg.
You know, taking bone graft from his femur,
You know, bone graft from his hip.
Uh, you know, big, big surgery.
WOMAN: Ready. Set. Go. No hands.
In and out of surgery, you can't hold down a job.
I couldn't bear with the pain anymore.
It was affecting my mental health.
I was low. Really low.
And amputation was really the only thing left on the table.
It was a horrible three years, actually. Angus was ready.
He really was ready. It was a horrible three years, actually. Angus was ready.
He really was ready.
It just wasn't working. It had to go.
I remember vividly the anaesthetic bay
before I was about to remove Gus' leg.
I just remember saying, "Gus, um, be nervous, mate,
I just remember saying, "but don't be afraid.
"This is the first day "but don't be afraid.
"This is the first day of the rest of your life."
He woke up in recovery and it was like he was a different person.
It all happened really quickly.
I was at the prosthetist
and, you know, getting sized up for a leg.
So, we're going to do a bit of walking.
Alright. You ready? Yes.
Yeah.
It was maybe a month
where I had my first steps It was maybe a month
where I had my first steps in the new leg,
where I had my first steps and it hurt to high heavens,
but, um...
Is it like that? Yeah. The body just...
It's amazing what the body gets used to.
It's amazing what the body Um, doesn't take much time.
And next minute you're just walking.
And it was an amazing feeling.
JOSH: Yes, yes. Come on.
This is it, bro. Come on.
The climbing world is one that brings people together.
The climbing world is one Yeah.
It's really a giving and caring community Yeah.
It's really a giving and caring community
that I think has really helped Angus find his way back.
(SHOUTS OF ENCOURAGEMENT)
They were the net, you know, that I fell into.
They'd all chipped in for this climbing leg,
They'd all chipped in extra pairs of shoes for it,
and just reinforces how beautiful the climbing community is.
When I'm not climbing,
you know, I obviously have a job.
I have to work, you know, I obviously have a job.
I have to work, like the rest of us.
The space that I work in is carbon management and energy.
Life starts taking on a much more normal shape at this point.
And we all decided that we were going to go to see this gig
at the Enmore Theatre.
The crowd was wild.
I'm in the mosh with my prosthetic
and really having a time.
And, yeah, and really having a time.
And, yeah, my leg was off at one point
and I was looking down for my leg and I was like...
.."Oh, my God, where did it go?"
It just started sailing across everyone's heads.
It was like a beach ball at a festival or something.
It was like a beach ball But it was my leg.
CROWD: (CHANTS) Leggy! Leggy! Leggy!
It was so gross. It was so gross.
Yeah. Kind of the moment that I realised things were fun again.
I'm in my mid-30s,
moving on from the accident, from the divorce.
Um, you know, getting back into music again.
Um, you know, (INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
This house, this share house (INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
This house, this share house with the guys,
was just sort of the centre of the universe at the time,
and a lot of good times there, making memories.
Part of that was finding and meeting Richard Mills,
or Millsy,
and, yeah, I mean, Legend of Legends.
He's well known as the barefooted, larrikin,
tall, lanky, slinking bass player.
Really chill, easy to get along with New Zealand bloke.
RYAN: So, Millsy was on a few television ads.
He was a handsome bastard.
JINGLE: Gotta do your thing.
He was just always bringing the fun.
Oh, here we go. And the stoke.
And, yeah... Look at that.
What a shot.
Psyched as forever.
Millsy, he'd been, uh, hassling me.
"Hey, mate. How are you? Can we.... Can we go climbing?"
"Hey, mate. How are you? So I thought, OK,
well, what is the best single-day climbing experience
for someone who's never, never been climbing outdoors?
And there's this extraordinarily beautiful climb,
And there's this extraordinarily aptly named Sweet Dreams.
WOMAN: Rich FaceTimed us on the Friday before the rock climb.
He sent a couple of pictures to my phone
He sent a couple of pictures of Sweet Dreams, the rock face,
and we thought, "Holy heck."
First ever fucking rock climb, mate.
Um, I'm on the edge of a fucking cliff and a mountain.
Yeah, probably about it.
It's arguably one of the safest routes in the Blue Mountains.
You'll be able to get people up this rock climb
who have never spent a day on rock in their lives.
Before we headed up that day,
you know, I was showing Millsy how to use the ropes
you know, I was showing Millsy and how to belay.
And I remember saying to him, you know, and how to belay.
And I remember saying to him, you know,
"Whatever, whatever happens,
"like, if a bee comes along and stings you on the face,
"um, just don't... don't let go of the rope."
Yeeew.
Who's this geezer over there?
We, um, started up the climb,
and he was having so much fun.
The smile on his face was, like, priceless.
Well done, I'd say, mate. Well done. Good innings.
Hey, mate, we're halfway there. We'll wait till the end. Hey?
Hey, mate, we're halfway there. Wait. Let's wait to the end.
I start climbing up the gully.
The rock under my feet,
um, it just gave way.
I called out...
..um, screamed, "Rock!"
Rich saw the rock coming, and he tried to avoid the rock.
So he leaned forward and it smacked him on his back,
which was a 30 centimetre rock, and it just shattered on his back.
When I got to him
he was, um, kind of conscious, unconscious,
sort of somewhere between the two and...
..you know, he was not in a good way.
But the bastard was still holding the rope,
sort of leant down and give him a hug.
sort of leant down And he said, "I'm so sorry."
And he looked at me and he said, "Uh..."
"..it's cool."
He said, "It's cool, man."
And just smiled.
And that was the last thing he said.
We're so grateful that he was there, holding his hand
and looking after him.
NEWSREADER: Breaking news for you.
A rockclimber has died in a freak accident in the Blue Mountains.
REPORTER: The team managed to abseil down a cliff face to get to the man
who was resting on a ledge.
But although he was treated at the scene,
he died during the operation this afternoon.
The idea of a rock breaking on Sweet Dreams, he died during the operation this afternoon.
The idea of a rock breaking on Sweet Dreams,
causing the injuries that it did
is just like you wouldn't...
You wouldn't think that was possible in your wildest dreams.
I went into a hole.
I went into a very deep hole
and I didn't want to come out.
I didn't feel like
I deserved to be...to be around.
RYAN: Super worried about Gus during the whole time.
Like, none of us knew what to do. RYAN: Super worried about Gus during the whole time.
Like, none of us knew what to do.
What...? No-one knows what to do.
Millsy's folks were in touch with my mum
Millsy's folks because I wasn't really in a,
I didn't really feel like I could talk to anyone.
They came over here from NZ and they took on the role of Millsy,
and they brought everyone together and helped everyone heal together.
How are you? Good to see you both.
How are you? It's bloody good to see you guys.
How are you? Yeah, I'm alright.
They're going through the hardest time you can possibly imagine,
as a parent losing your child, you know.
And there they are, trying to put a hand out and see if I'm doing OK.
You know?
It's that bit of grey...grey wall that's...
So Sweet Dreams is just left. Oh, that one.
So Sweet Dreams is just left. Just a little touch left.
It's just a question I've always Just a little touch left.
It's just a question I've always wanted to ask you,
It's just a question I've always you know, sometimes.
Just having the chance to show you the photo, you know?
Just having the chance So is that the exit?
16?
That's the exit here. Through this gully.
I've always just wondered exactly where the position of the climb was.
And I know it's a silly sort of detail, I've always just wondered exactly where the position of the climb was.
And I know it's a silly sort of detail,
but as a parent, it's just nice to know where it all happened.
Last time we played was at Millsy's graduation,
Last time we played when we came here.
Did you ever have a game of pool with Dicky here?
I don't think I did. No, no. Millsy?
I don't think I did. No, no. Hey. Oh, look at that.
Poor old Gus,
I mean, he probably didn't know Poor old Gus,
I mean, he probably didn't know what to expect from us as a family.
We didn't ever think it was Gus's fault.
We knew it was a freak accident, it was Gus's fault.
We knew it was a freak accident,
and, yeah, we didn't want him to feel any blame for it.
Oh, shot.
It is something I've found hard to accept.
It just almost seems too gracious.
I just feel like I'm at the centre
of the most painful moment of their lives, you know?
of the most painful moment And that's, um...
It's hard to sit with.
If Millsy hadn't have been doing his job properly,
Gus would have died as well.
And that's just Rich to the end.
I completely burned the idea of climbing.
It revolted me just thinking about it.
It revolted me But there was a conflicting voice,
which is basically Millsy
telling me to get on with it.
Being in a hole wasn't... telling me to get on with it.
Being in a hole wasn't... wasn't what he wanted.
It's not how he would have lived his life.
If anything, he was the image of the complete opposite.
If anything, he was the image Squeezing the lemon.
And I felt like I was dishonouring that.
Angus is resilient.
Over the course of maybe six months or so,
and with a lot of encouragement from the climbing community
and therapy and whatever else that he needed to do,
and therapy and whatever else that eventually got him back.
I really felt sick in the anticipation of doing it.
And then the moment I pulled on,
I don't even know how to explain it,
but it was like a weight had lifted...
..and I just felt like me.
It was like reconnecting with myself.
It was like...
..plugging in the lamp.
Okey dokey.
Climbing has this way of moulding itself
into the thing I've needed at the time.
Completely taken by surprise
that I was approached for the National Paraclimbing Team.
I was...I was all for it.
(CHEERING, APPLAUSE)
So, using the holds directionally, if we get our left foot up (CHEERING, APPLAUSE)
So, using the holds directionally, if we get our left foot up
and push our left knee all the way over,
that position is almost effortless.
Tonight is really all about trying to raise money
for the paraclimbing team to get them over to the World Cup.
Have you ever climbed before?
Before this I have. Yeah. OK.
JOSH: Taking up competitive climbing
seems like it's been hugely helpful for Gus.
It's given him a goal, something to work towards
and something to focus that energy on.
I mean, it's going to feel really physical, but...
Yes.
Come on. Nice.
Come on.
Come on. Yes! Come on.
Come on.
OSCAR: I think it's so great
that he's carrying on with his passion in life, basically.
So, we're all 100% behind him, eh?
See what happens if you really try
and rock your weight over your left knee.
Just watching him cope in the way that he does,
I really admire
how he just seems to appreciate I really admire
how he just seems to appreciate
the beauty of painful things
as well as beautiful things.
So, we'll get you nice and close.
Climbing doesn't just teach you
the things necessary to get to the top of a climb.
Alright, so I'll clip you in.
It's taught me how to push through.
That's it. Yes.
How to deal with failure. How to grow. How to improve.
Yeah. I mean, climbing is the best teacher I've had.
How's that?
That was actually so rad.
Well done.
# And I said...
# Yeah, yeah, yeah... #
Yeah, buddy.
Whoo! Your leg stayed on.
How was that?
Captions by Red Bee Media
Copyright Australian Broadcasting Corporation