1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:01,000 Previously on... 2 00:00:02,312 --> 00:00:03,312 Dave got caught... 3 00:00:04,017 --> 00:00:06,007 ...changing your name and living near your family, 4 00:00:06,018 --> 00:00:07,518 it's not healthy or safe. 5 00:00:08,219 --> 00:00:09,838 Gaby got leverage. 6 00:00:09,906 --> 00:00:11,863 I'm getting that bonus after all. 7 00:00:11,932 --> 00:00:14,935 So, Brad, what sort of bonus are we looking at? 8 00:00:15,004 --> 00:00:17,264 Katherine dropped a bomb. - Mike's moving in here. 9 00:00:17,332 --> 00:00:19,491 What? - Tom called it quits. 10 00:00:19,560 --> 00:00:21,348 If we're gonna sell this place, 11 00:00:21,416 --> 00:00:24,186 We should probably know exactly how much it's worth. 12 00:00:24,187 --> 00:00:25,702 And Bree got honest... 13 00:00:25,771 --> 00:00:28,571 You're paid based on your contribution. - You're saying I'm worthless. 14 00:00:28,640 --> 00:00:31,677 No, I'm just saying you're worth... less. 15 00:00:31,745 --> 00:00:34,883 Which resulted in some strange behavior. 16 00:00:41,433 --> 00:00:43,895 Everyone who met Orson Hodge 17 00:00:43,964 --> 00:00:47,743 knew he believed in being polite. 18 00:00:47,812 --> 00:00:50,714 He greeted his neighbors each day with a sunny... 19 00:00:50,782 --> 00:00:53,717 Good morning. 20 00:00:53,786 --> 00:00:56,621 He opened doors for young women with a gallant... 21 00:00:56,688 --> 00:00:58,442 Allow me. 22 00:01:00,301 --> 00:01:03,032 If he bumped into a stranger on the street... 23 00:01:03,033 --> 00:01:03,169 Oh! 24 00:01:03,237 --> 00:01:06,712 He'd cheerfully say... - I beg your pardon. 25 00:01:06,781 --> 00:01:11,100 And if one of his friends was having a hard time, 26 00:01:11,169 --> 00:01:14,780 Orson was the first to say... - You need some help there? 27 00:01:14,848 --> 00:01:18,189 Whether his friend wanted his help or not. 28 00:01:18,257 --> 00:01:19,640 Orson. 29 00:01:19,708 --> 00:01:21,936 What are you doing here? 30 00:01:22,003 --> 00:01:24,298 Well, I heard about your going out of business sale, 31 00:01:24,366 --> 00:01:26,526 and I thought you could use a hand. 32 00:01:26,594 --> 00:01:28,247 I'm good. Thanks. 33 00:01:30,679 --> 00:01:34,458 Oh! Wow. This is charming. 34 00:01:34,526 --> 00:01:36,989 Oh, it's a salt shaker my grandfather gave me. 35 00:01:37,058 --> 00:01:39,183 Used to display it on the shelf. 36 00:01:39,252 --> 00:01:41,310 How much you want for it? 37 00:01:41,378 --> 00:01:42,829 It's not for sale. 38 00:01:42,897 --> 00:01:45,394 Everything in that box is stuff I'm taking with me. 39 00:01:45,462 --> 00:01:46,845 Oh. Okay. 40 00:01:46,914 --> 00:01:48,803 Just trying to help out. 41 00:01:48,871 --> 00:01:51,503 Know it's a difficult day, 42 00:01:51,572 --> 00:01:53,495 And I think I, of all people, 43 00:01:53,563 --> 00:01:56,330 understand what it is you're going through. 44 00:01:56,398 --> 00:01:58,895 Why you "of all people"? 45 00:01:58,964 --> 00:02:00,887 Well, I know what it's like 46 00:02:00,956 --> 00:02:03,013 to have your livelihood suddenly vanish. 47 00:02:03,082 --> 00:02:05,005 Remember, I used to be a dentist. 48 00:02:05,073 --> 00:02:07,165 Oh. Right. 49 00:02:07,234 --> 00:02:08,988 Right. 50 00:02:09,056 --> 00:02:14,253 Of course, it's not really the same, is it? 51 00:02:14,322 --> 00:02:14,919 What's not? 52 00:02:14,920 --> 00:02:18,067 My business started going south because of a bad economy. 53 00:02:18,135 --> 00:02:20,092 It got worse when my son 54 00:02:20,161 --> 00:02:22,084 was accused of a crime that he didn't commit, 55 00:02:22,152 --> 00:02:24,548 but you lost your license because you went to prison 56 00:02:24,617 --> 00:02:27,551 for a crime you did commit. 57 00:02:27,620 --> 00:02:30,016 Why are you being this way? 58 00:02:30,084 --> 00:02:32,783 Because what's happening to me is unfair. 59 00:02:32,852 --> 00:02:35,585 What happened to you was... - Justice? 60 00:02:35,653 --> 00:02:37,611 Yeah, and to compare my situation with yours, 61 00:02:37,678 --> 00:02:39,601 on a day like this, 62 00:02:39,670 --> 00:02:42,606 well, I gotta tell you, it's a little insulting. 63 00:02:42,675 --> 00:02:44,969 Then I apologize. 64 00:02:45,037 --> 00:02:47,466 My intention was never to insult you. 65 00:02:47,535 --> 00:02:50,639 I wanted to support you in your--in your hour of need. 66 00:02:50,708 --> 00:02:54,116 Uh-huh. Um, vultures are starting to arrive. 67 00:02:54,184 --> 00:02:56,479 I'll leave you to it, then. 68 00:02:59,315 --> 00:03:02,554 Yes, everyone who met Orson Hodge 69 00:03:02,622 --> 00:03:05,929 knew he believed in being polite. 70 00:03:05,998 --> 00:03:08,157 What they didn't know is 71 00:03:08,225 --> 00:03:10,621 that he also believed 72 00:03:10,690 --> 00:03:13,287 in punishing those who weren't. 73 00:03:15,550 --> 00:03:18,486 Captioning provided by abc studios and abc, inc. 74 00:03:18,555 --> 00:03:21,658 And brought to you by Ford. Drive one. 75 00:03:21,727 --> 00:03:25,844 Captioned by closed captioning services, inc. 76 00:03:25,912 --> 00:03:27,869 The day after Mike Delfino 77 00:03:27,937 --> 00:03:29,961 moved in with Katherine Mayfair, 78 00:03:30,030 --> 00:03:34,316 she thought it would be nice to share her happiness, 79 00:03:34,384 --> 00:03:38,130 so she decided to throw a housewarng party 80 00:03:38,199 --> 00:03:40,627 for her friends and neighbors. 81 00:03:42,620 --> 00:03:47,243 But from the moment the first invitation was delivered, 82 00:03:47,312 --> 00:03:51,058 her friends began making assumptions 83 00:03:51,126 --> 00:03:55,041 about those who had been invited... 84 00:03:55,109 --> 00:03:57,404 and about those who hadn't. 85 00:03:57,471 --> 00:04:00,407 I know it's late notice, but I do hope 86 00:04:00,476 --> 00:04:03,783 you'll all be able to make it. - Now does this really mean no gifts, 87 00:04:03,852 --> 00:04:06,213 or is it like when Gaby says "no gifts" 88 00:04:06,281 --> 00:04:10,061 And she means no cheap gifts? - You know, Katherine, if you need any help, 89 00:04:10,129 --> 00:04:12,795 I would be happy to make my fam-- - Shh! 90 00:04:12,863 --> 00:04:16,237 Hey, guys. What are we talking about? 91 00:04:16,306 --> 00:04:19,040 The federal deficit. 92 00:04:19,107 --> 00:04:21,335 Whoo! That sucker's big! 93 00:04:22,821 --> 00:04:26,937 Actually, Susan, we were talking about my hsewarming party. 94 00:04:27,006 --> 00:04:30,717 Oh, yeah. I'm so excited. You got my R.S.V.P., right? 95 00:04:30,786 --> 00:04:33,553 Yes. I'm so glad you're coming. Oh, um, by the way, 96 00:04:33,622 --> 00:04:36,962 can you bring your blue punch bowl? - Absolutely. Anything else you need? 97 00:04:37,031 --> 00:04:39,562 Whoa, whoa, whoa. What's happening here? 98 00:04:39,629 --> 00:04:41,755 Why isn't hair being pulled? 99 00:04:41,824 --> 00:04:43,747 Why would we do that? 100 00:04:43,815 --> 00:04:46,582 Um, let's see. She's shacking up with your ex? 101 00:04:46,651 --> 00:04:49,586 Something which, when I do it, I get an angry mob 102 00:04:49,654 --> 00:04:52,658 on my front lawn. - I mean, let's be honest, Susan. 103 00:04:52,727 --> 00:04:54,649 You weren't exactly over the moon 104 00:04:54,717 --> 00:04:56,207 when you heard they were gonna live together. 105 00:04:56,208 --> 00:04:58,497 Well, yes, I was upset at first. 106 00:04:58,565 --> 00:05:02,176 But, you know, Mike was gonna be with someone eventually, 107 00:05:02,245 --> 00:05:05,045 and I consider myself lucky that it was someone, who, 108 00:05:05,113 --> 00:05:08,555 after all is said and done, has always been my true friend. 109 00:05:08,624 --> 00:05:10,952 Susan, that's very sweet. 110 00:05:11,020 --> 00:05:12,268 And admirable. 111 00:05:12,337 --> 00:05:15,069 And abnormal. 112 00:05:15,138 --> 00:05:18,142 Hey, Gaby, remember when I was with Carlos? - Shut it, bitch. 113 00:05:18,209 --> 00:05:21,213 See? That's normal. 114 00:05:29,011 --> 00:05:32,217 I'll give you... $6,000 for it. 115 00:05:32,285 --> 00:05:34,478 What? It's a $12,000 oven. 116 00:05:34,547 --> 00:05:36,503 There's a dent in the door. 117 00:05:36,537 --> 00:05:39,170 Not a dent. A fist print. 118 00:05:39,238 --> 00:05:41,667 My husband's been a little frustrated lately. 119 00:05:41,736 --> 00:05:43,187 On the plus side, 120 00:05:43,254 --> 00:05:45,515 it matches the shoe print on the dishwasher. 121 00:05:45,584 --> 00:05:47,743 $6,200--take it or leave it. 122 00:05:47,812 --> 00:05:50,240 Yi, Yi, Yi, Yi. 123 00:05:50,309 --> 00:05:52,097 Fine. Congratulations. 124 00:05:52,165 --> 00:05:55,033 You just stole a pizza oven. 125 00:05:55,102 --> 00:05:58,139 Hey. - Hey. I got $6,200 for the oven. 126 00:05:58,208 --> 00:06:00,164 What?! That guy is ripping us off. 127 00:06:00,233 --> 00:06:02,493 Yeah, well, putting an "everything must go" sign 128 00:06:02,562 --> 00:06:04,991 kind of eroded our bargaining position. 129 00:06:05,059 --> 00:06:06,982 How are we doing on the other stuff? 130 00:06:07,051 --> 00:06:09,007 Well, by the end of the day, 131 00:06:09,076 --> 00:06:11,336 we should be able to pay off our creditors, 132 00:06:11,405 --> 00:06:14,341 give Bree back the $20,000 that we owe her 133 00:06:14,409 --> 00:06:16,704 and have enough to live on for... 134 00:06:16,772 --> 00:06:18,628 45 minutes. 135 00:06:18,695 --> 00:06:21,339 Forget I asked. I don't want to talk about it now. 136 00:06:21,340 --> 00:06:21,598 Ohh. 137 00:06:21,666 --> 00:06:22,148 Just... 138 00:06:22,149 --> 00:06:25,040 Look, I know this is a crappy day for you, 139 00:06:25,109 --> 00:06:27,065 but we need to start thinking 140 00:06:27,134 --> 00:06:30,913 About what our plans are going to be. - I told you, I'm gonna get a job. 141 00:06:30,982 --> 00:06:32,905 And that is so great. 142 00:06:32,974 --> 00:06:35,009 So when do you think that great thing might happen? 143 00:06:35,010 --> 00:06:35,909 Lynette, don't. 144 00:06:35,977 --> 00:06:38,945 It's taken everything I got not to lose it right now. 145 00:06:38,946 --> 00:06:39,824 Sorry. 146 00:06:39,893 --> 00:06:41,816 You honestly think you're gonna get $200 147 00:06:41,884 --> 00:06:44,077 for that cappuccino machine? I'll give you $50. 148 00:06:44,146 --> 00:06:48,330 50 bucks?! Are you-- - You--ah. Hey. 149 00:06:48,365 --> 00:06:51,368 I think you better stop with the bargain hunting 150 00:06:51,437 --> 00:06:53,360 unless you want your face 151 00:06:53,428 --> 00:06:56,094 to match the oven and the dishwasher. 152 00:06:58,120 --> 00:07:01,224 Hey, guys! 153 00:07:01,292 --> 00:07:03,215 What the hell are they doing here? 154 00:07:03,284 --> 00:07:05,241 They had theater tickets, and their sitter canceled. 155 00:07:05,309 --> 00:07:07,542 We're only gonna watch their kids for a couple hours. 156 00:07:07,543 --> 00:07:08,245 Good idea, Gaby. 157 00:07:08,313 --> 00:07:10,574 We're helping the slimeball cheat on his wife. 158 00:07:10,643 --> 00:07:12,700 Why not babysit for him, too? - Shh. Hi! 159 00:07:12,769 --> 00:07:15,198 Oh, you guys are angels for doing this. 160 00:07:15,267 --> 00:07:18,134 Well, what are friends for? Speaking of which, 161 00:07:18,237 --> 00:07:20,329 thanks for hooking Brad up with his new girl. 162 00:07:20,397 --> 00:07:22,692 Uh, Shayla, right? 163 00:07:22,759 --> 00:07:25,155 You know, that hairstylist you recommended-- 164 00:07:25,224 --> 00:07:27,586 Uh, I was at the mall making an appointment, 165 00:07:27,654 --> 00:07:29,543 and Maria walked by. 166 00:07:29,612 --> 00:07:31,287 Oh, that Shayla. 167 00:07:31,288 --> 00:07:33,357 How many shaylas do you know? 168 00:07:33,426 --> 00:07:35,113 Two. Two. 169 00:07:35,181 --> 00:07:37,104 There's, uh, Shayla the hairstylist 170 00:07:37,173 --> 00:07:39,264 and then there's this other Shayla I know 171 00:07:39,332 --> 00:07:42,167 who's a home-wrecking whore. 172 00:07:42,236 --> 00:07:45,171 Hey, Carlos. Uh, why don't you take, uh, Maria and the kids 173 00:07:45,240 --> 00:07:48,141 Inside and introduce them to the girls? - Come on, guys. 174 00:07:48,210 --> 00:07:49,997 Come on in. - All right. Let's go. 175 00:07:52,665 --> 00:07:55,229 You're using me as an alibi now? 176 00:07:55,298 --> 00:07:57,795 I paid you 30 grand. I want my money's worth. 177 00:07:57,864 --> 00:08:00,934 And by the way, your tennis game with Maria tomorrow-- 178 00:08:01,003 --> 00:08:02,293 You need to move it to noon. 179 00:08:02,294 --> 00:08:04,275 Why? So you can go get another "haircut"? 180 00:08:04,344 --> 00:08:06,773 Shayla's got a couple hours off, 181 00:08:06,841 --> 00:08:09,744 and I want to spend 'em with her. - Well, Bradley, we all want things. 182 00:08:09,811 --> 00:08:11,769 For instance, I would like Carlos 183 00:08:11,837 --> 00:08:13,349 to have a week off next month. 184 00:08:13,350 --> 00:08:15,515 Impossible. It's our busiest time. 185 00:08:15,584 --> 00:08:19,127 Come on, Brad. We don't want to be late. 186 00:08:19,195 --> 00:08:22,401 Oh, Gaby, we're still on for tennis tomorrow, right? 187 00:08:22,469 --> 00:08:23,413 4:00? 188 00:08:23,482 --> 00:08:27,464 4:00? Let me think. Uh... 189 00:08:27,532 --> 00:08:30,299 Um... 190 00:08:33,777 --> 00:08:37,354 Actually, noon would be better for me, could you do noon? 191 00:08:37,422 --> 00:08:40,392 Oh, I was supposed to have lunch with Brad. 192 00:08:40,460 --> 00:08:41,842 Do you mind, sweetie? 193 00:08:41,911 --> 00:08:43,834 Well, I was really looking forward to it, 194 00:08:43,903 --> 00:08:45,961 but, uh... go ahead. You girls have fun. 195 00:08:46,029 --> 00:08:49,235 Listen to him. Can you believe this guy? 196 00:08:49,303 --> 00:08:52,273 Nope. He is not to be believed. 197 00:09:03,108 --> 00:09:05,031 My, what an interesting coat hanger. 198 00:09:05,100 --> 00:09:07,056 It's shaped like a sofa. 199 00:09:07,125 --> 00:09:09,352 Please put it in the closet. 200 00:09:09,420 --> 00:09:11,343 Sorry, darling. 201 00:09:17,926 --> 00:09:19,748 Orson? 202 00:09:19,816 --> 00:09:23,528 Why do you have a salt shaker from Scavo's Pizzeria? 203 00:09:23,597 --> 00:09:25,149 Oh. 204 00:09:25,217 --> 00:09:27,883 I stopped by to express my sympathies with Tom, 205 00:09:27,951 --> 00:09:29,671 and I-I remember l-looking at it, 206 00:09:29,740 --> 00:09:33,216 and I-I guess I absentmindedly put it in my pocket. 207 00:09:33,284 --> 00:09:35,376 Well, take it back now. They're liquidating, 208 00:09:35,445 --> 00:09:37,469 And they're gonna need every penny they can get. 209 00:09:37,536 --> 00:09:38,548 Ma... 210 00:09:38,617 --> 00:09:40,573 I want to stay here with you. 211 00:09:40,642 --> 00:09:43,274 Me no like-a the Scavos so much-a. 212 00:09:44,861 --> 00:09:45,805 No? 213 00:09:45,874 --> 00:09:46,818 No. 214 00:09:46,887 --> 00:09:49,148 Oh. Very well. 215 00:09:49,215 --> 00:09:50,767 Though I'm not looking forward to going down there again. 216 00:09:50,768 --> 00:09:51,368 Really? 217 00:09:51,389 --> 00:09:54,155 Yes. I only went down there to commiserate, 218 00:09:54,224 --> 00:09:55,978 and he was very dismissive. 219 00:09:55,979 --> 00:09:57,733 Tom has a lot on his mind. I'm sure he didn't mean it. 220 00:09:58,801 --> 00:10:02,345 You weren't there, Bree. He was downright rude. 221 00:10:02,413 --> 00:10:05,450 You know, it would serve him right if I kept this. 222 00:10:05,518 --> 00:10:06,935 Don't be ridiculous. 223 00:10:07,004 --> 00:10:09,635 Tom's rudeness does not give you license to steal. 224 00:10:09,704 --> 00:10:11,155 Return it immediately. 225 00:10:11,222 --> 00:10:13,686 Ma, you-- you such a pretty girl. 226 00:10:13,754 --> 00:10:16,690 I wanna live-a here with you. Mwah. Mwah. 227 00:10:16,759 --> 00:10:18,142 Hmm? 228 00:10:23,070 --> 00:10:24,251 Hey. 229 00:10:24,319 --> 00:10:26,309 Oh, great. You found the punch bowl. 230 00:10:26,378 --> 00:10:28,200 Washed, cleaned, ready to go. 231 00:10:28,269 --> 00:10:31,642 Sorry about the mess. Mike's still unpacking. 232 00:10:31,711 --> 00:10:35,086 Hey, did you manage to keep that antler chandelier out of here? 233 00:10:35,154 --> 00:10:37,077 Yeah. That went right to the garage. 234 00:10:37,145 --> 00:10:39,102 The tough one was the framed towel 235 00:10:39,171 --> 00:10:41,161 with some football guy's sweat on it. 236 00:10:41,229 --> 00:10:43,895 That "football guy" is Peyton Manning. 237 00:10:43,964 --> 00:10:46,730 You would do well to learn that name. - Ah. 238 00:10:46,799 --> 00:10:50,174 Oh. Wow. 239 00:10:50,241 --> 00:10:52,570 Oh, now that I really love. 240 00:10:52,638 --> 00:10:55,134 I almost couldn't believe he had something that nice. 241 00:10:55,203 --> 00:10:58,038 Thank you. - For what? 242 00:10:58,107 --> 00:11:00,164 I painted it. It was a gift for him. 243 00:11:00,266 --> 00:11:02,763 Really? 244 00:11:04,283 --> 00:11:07,455 You painted that. He didn't mention it. 245 00:11:07,523 --> 00:11:11,269 Yeah. It was a little beach we went to for our honeymoon. 246 00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:14,273 Uh, I mean, you know how much Mike loves the ocean. 247 00:11:14,342 --> 00:11:16,669 Yeah. 248 00:11:16,738 --> 00:11:20,214 Now I can see it every day. 249 00:11:20,283 --> 00:11:22,340 Anyway, um, can't wait for the party. 250 00:11:22,409 --> 00:11:24,770 It's gonna be fun. 251 00:11:24,839 --> 00:11:26,357 Yep. 252 00:11:37,302 --> 00:11:39,933 I'm sorry you have to go through this. It must be so hard. 253 00:11:40,002 --> 00:11:42,937 The hard part was when my friend tried help me with a loan, 254 00:11:43,006 --> 00:11:45,266 and I thanked her by becoming a lunatic 255 00:11:45,335 --> 00:11:46,785 and denting her car. 256 00:11:46,854 --> 00:11:48,811 Now that you brought it up, 257 00:11:48,879 --> 00:11:51,275 Lynette, I've been feeling just awful about the way 258 00:11:51,343 --> 00:11:53,300 I took over your restaurant and insulted you 259 00:11:53,368 --> 00:11:55,662 and... what can I say? 260 00:11:55,731 --> 00:11:57,654 I think we have the kind of friendship 261 00:11:57,723 --> 00:11:59,646 where you don't have to say anything. 262 00:11:59,714 --> 00:12:02,480 Let's just hug and move on. 263 00:12:02,549 --> 00:12:05,316 Okay? 264 00:12:05,384 --> 00:12:09,535 Oh. How's Tom holding up? 265 00:12:09,604 --> 00:12:11,290 He's doing great. 266 00:12:13,721 --> 00:12:15,104 Isn't it noon? 267 00:12:15,173 --> 00:12:17,197 Yeah. He's up early today. 268 00:12:19,493 --> 00:12:22,462 He just doesn't know what he's doing next. 269 00:12:22,531 --> 00:12:24,454 Maybe I can help. 270 00:12:24,523 --> 00:12:27,458 My publisher is thinking about doing his advertising in-house, 271 00:12:27,526 --> 00:12:29,686 and he's been looking for someone. 272 00:12:29,755 --> 00:12:31,576 Seriously? - Yeah. 273 00:12:31,644 --> 00:12:33,567 Oh, my God. That would be great. 274 00:12:33,636 --> 00:12:36,471 And if he gets the job, you can actually cash the check. 275 00:12:36,538 --> 00:12:37,989 I tell you what. 276 00:12:38,058 --> 00:12:39,981 I will invite Bruce over for dinner, 277 00:12:40,049 --> 00:12:42,006 you and Tom can join us, and we'll turn it 278 00:12:42,074 --> 00:12:44,098 into a low pressure job interview. 279 00:12:44,099 --> 00:12:46,123 Thank you. This will really cheer Tom up. 280 00:12:46,192 --> 00:12:49,263 Great. I'll call Bruce this afternoon. 281 00:12:54,057 --> 00:12:57,735 Could you call him now? 282 00:13:00,706 --> 00:13:02,629 Hey, Mike. 283 00:13:02,697 --> 00:13:05,261 Oh, I'm looking forward to one of your world-famous martinis. 284 00:13:05,330 --> 00:13:07,928 So was Mrs. Mccluskey. She got here early. 285 00:13:09,719 --> 00:13:10,286 Ah. 286 00:13:10,287 --> 00:13:12,654 Yeah, but don't panic. I sent Edie out for more booze. 287 00:13:12,722 --> 00:13:15,827 Ah. So you sent the mouse to buy the cheese. Well done. 288 00:13:15,895 --> 00:13:17,447 Well, look who's here. 289 00:13:17,515 --> 00:13:19,978 Somebody owes me $20. How about we let it ride? 290 00:13:20,047 --> 00:13:22,746 Double or nothing--McCluskey slugs someone by 5:00. 291 00:13:22,815 --> 00:13:25,480 Katherine and I told you guys we were taking the high road. 292 00:13:25,549 --> 00:13:28,450 Why won't you believe us? - Because I vividly remember yesterday, 293 00:13:28,519 --> 00:13:30,442 and I wasn't born during it. 294 00:13:30,511 --> 00:13:31,960 Okay, you know what? 295 00:13:32,029 --> 00:13:34,931 Let me show you something I think might change your mind. 296 00:13:34,999 --> 00:13:37,260 So Katherine has a picture that I painted for Mike 297 00:13:37,329 --> 00:13:39,927 hanging over her mantelpiece. - Does she know you painted it? 298 00:13:39,995 --> 00:13:42,829 Yes, and we talked all about it. She loves it. 299 00:13:46,746 --> 00:13:48,702 You painted that? Wow. You're good. 300 00:13:48,771 --> 00:13:52,280 What? Where the hell is it? - Bye-bye, high road. 301 00:13:52,349 --> 00:13:54,136 What's with the puss? 302 00:13:54,205 --> 00:13:56,027 Katherine hung one of Mike's paintings over the mantel 303 00:13:56,096 --> 00:13:58,997 till she found out Susan painted it. 304 00:13:59,066 --> 00:14:00,015 Then she took it down. 305 00:14:00,016 --> 00:14:02,474 Ooh. Something tells me this party's about to get good. 306 00:14:02,543 --> 00:14:04,567 You know, there could be 307 00:14:04,635 --> 00:14:07,300 A perfectly innocent explanation. - Hey, Kathy. 308 00:14:07,369 --> 00:14:10,474 What happened to Susan's painting? 309 00:14:10,541 --> 00:14:13,477 Oh! I am such a klutz. 310 00:14:13,546 --> 00:14:15,030 I was dusting yesterday, 311 00:14:15,099 --> 00:14:17,731 and, well, it just fell. 312 00:14:19,149 --> 00:14:21,072 The glass shattered, and ugh. 313 00:14:21,141 --> 00:14:24,413 It took it to the framer. It'll be back in a jiffy. 314 00:14:24,482 --> 00:14:25,628 Mm. 315 00:14:25,697 --> 00:14:27,383 Oh! Excuse me. 316 00:14:28,904 --> 00:14:32,008 See a peectly innocent... 317 00:14:32,076 --> 00:14:34,269 bald-faced lie. 318 00:14:34,338 --> 00:14:36,329 It is possible. 319 00:14:36,397 --> 00:14:38,387 I just drained a pitcher of martinis. 320 00:14:38,456 --> 00:14:40,041 I'm not buying it. 321 00:14:40,110 --> 00:14:42,067 Really, Susan, there's not a woman in the world 322 00:14:42,135 --> 00:14:44,226 who doesn't know what "I broke it dusting" means. 323 00:14:44,227 --> 00:14:45,104 That's how I got rid 324 00:14:45,139 --> 00:14:48,344 of Tom's last bottle of "musk, the cologne for men." 325 00:14:48,413 --> 00:14:50,370 All right, you guys think what you want. 326 00:14:50,438 --> 00:14:52,530 I'm gonna choose to believe her. 327 00:15:18,150 --> 00:15:20,174 All right, so we have whiskey and bourbon. 328 00:15:20,243 --> 00:15:22,166 What else does Mike want? 329 00:15:22,234 --> 00:15:24,191 Bup, bup, bup. We need a system. 330 00:15:24,259 --> 00:15:26,182 Let's start over there in Scotland, 331 00:15:26,251 --> 00:15:28,718 Head over to Russia and work our way around the globe. 332 00:15:29,255 --> 00:15:32,190 Wow. It's crowded in here. - They're all buying lottery tickets. 333 00:15:32,259 --> 00:15:34,452 The jackpot's $100 million. 334 00:15:34,520 --> 00:15:36,139 Look. There's a priest. 335 00:15:36,208 --> 00:15:39,143 I knew that vow of poverty was a crock. 336 00:15:42,756 --> 00:15:44,881 Hello! 337 00:15:46,435 --> 00:15:48,560 You remember me. 338 00:15:48,629 --> 00:15:50,148 Father Drance. 339 00:15:51,904 --> 00:15:54,805 I-I didn't know you'd moved back to the area. 340 00:15:54,874 --> 00:15:58,349 Oh, I just remembered. Mike wants vermouth. 341 00:15:58,417 --> 00:16:00,948 Can you grab that before we forget? 342 00:16:01,017 --> 00:16:02,433 Sure. 343 00:16:02,502 --> 00:16:04,087 Right away. 344 00:16:05,607 --> 00:16:08,475 It's wonderful to see you looking so well. I-- 345 00:16:08,543 --> 00:16:10,567 Shut up. 346 00:16:10,636 --> 00:16:13,201 I'm only gonna say this once. I've moved on. 347 00:16:16,138 --> 00:16:18,061 I've remarried, I have a new life, 348 00:16:18,129 --> 00:16:21,065 and that's the way I want it to stay--new. 349 00:16:21,134 --> 00:16:23,225 Of course. 350 00:16:29,640 --> 00:16:32,203 So, uh, what was that about? 351 00:16:32,272 --> 00:16:35,208 Oh. He said we sat together once on an airplane. 352 00:16:35,277 --> 00:16:37,705 Apparently he's less memorable than he thinks he is. 353 00:16:37,774 --> 00:16:40,034 Come on. Don't want to miss the party. 354 00:16:48,093 --> 00:16:49,093 Fine 355 00:16:49,594 --> 00:16:52,158 Fine. 356 00:16:52,227 --> 00:16:54,656 Fine. I will do it, but you owe me. 357 00:16:54,725 --> 00:16:56,749 I gotta go. 358 00:16:56,817 --> 00:16:58,943 Let me guess. Brad. 359 00:16:59,011 --> 00:17:00,801 Yes, he wants me to take Maria shopping tomorrow. 360 00:17:00,802 --> 00:17:01,946 Yeah, so he can grab a quickie. 361 00:17:02,015 --> 00:17:03,938 You know, this whole thing is disgusting. 362 00:17:04,007 --> 00:17:06,942 I can't take it anymore. - I know. Just keep reminding yourself 363 00:17:07,010 --> 00:17:09,305 that we're getting things out of it, too. 364 00:17:09,373 --> 00:17:13,186 Things I don't want. Things I haven't earned. 365 00:17:13,255 --> 00:17:15,211 No, I'm gonna tell Bradley we're out. 366 00:17:15,280 --> 00:17:17,203 What? You can't do that. 367 00:17:17,272 --> 00:17:20,680 You'll lose your job and all that money. - I don't care about the money. 368 00:17:20,748 --> 00:17:22,165 I do... 369 00:17:22,234 --> 00:17:25,473 And so does my personal shopper and pilates instructor. 370 00:17:25,542 --> 00:17:28,544 Gaby, no. We're doing the right thing. 371 00:17:28,613 --> 00:17:31,650 Or we can... 372 00:17:31,718 --> 00:17:33,844 make someone else do the right thing. 373 00:17:33,912 --> 00:17:36,172 Gaby, what does that mean? 374 00:17:36,241 --> 00:17:38,434 It means... 375 00:17:38,502 --> 00:17:40,460 tomorrow I'm going to the mall 376 00:17:40,527 --> 00:17:43,463 to get my hair cut by a slut. 377 00:17:43,532 --> 00:17:46,501 Mm. 378 00:17:51,329 --> 00:17:53,947 Hey. Uh, look at what I found-- my beach painting. 379 00:17:54,434 --> 00:17:56,695 Oh, yeah. Katherine told me it broke. 380 00:17:56,763 --> 00:17:58,213 Sorry about that. 381 00:17:58,282 --> 00:18:00,712 Yeah, that's what she told me, too, 382 00:18:00,779 --> 00:18:03,614 Only, uh, it didn't. 383 00:18:09,150 --> 00:18:11,209 That's weird. Why would she... 384 00:18:11,277 --> 00:18:12,828 I don't know. 385 00:18:12,897 --> 00:18:16,103 She seemed to love the painting... 386 00:18:16,172 --> 00:18:19,748 until I told her that I painted it. 387 00:18:21,133 --> 00:18:23,123 Excuse me just a minute. 388 00:18:26,601 --> 00:18:29,232 I'm not making a big deal. 389 00:18:29,301 --> 00:18:32,237 I just want to know why you lied. Mike, please, not now. 390 00:18:32,306 --> 00:18:35,511 We have a house full of guests. - No, we'll talk about this now. 391 00:18:35,579 --> 00:18:38,110 What are you doing? - Uh, nothing. 392 00:18:38,179 --> 00:18:40,405 Susan showed me the painting. 393 00:18:40,474 --> 00:18:42,565 There's not a scratch on it. She what?! 394 00:18:42,634 --> 00:18:44,253 You didn't. 395 00:18:44,321 --> 00:18:47,156 Susan! 396 00:18:53,063 --> 00:18:56,168 I hope you enjoyed that. - I didn't. 397 00:19:00,928 --> 00:19:03,054 I didn't. Uh... 398 00:19:05,552 --> 00:19:08,387 So what are we thinking? 399 00:19:08,455 --> 00:19:11,019 Well, Shayla-- it is Shayla, right? 400 00:19:11,088 --> 00:19:12,370 Mm-hmm. 401 00:19:12,438 --> 00:19:14,733 I need a fresh look. - Mm. 402 00:19:14,800 --> 00:19:16,218 I've been going through 403 00:19:16,286 --> 00:19:18,311 some pretty intense personal stuff lately. 404 00:19:18,378 --> 00:19:19,559 Oh. Really? 405 00:19:19,628 --> 00:19:22,799 Fine. I'll tell you. 406 00:19:22,868 --> 00:19:26,309 I have been having an affair with a married man, 407 00:19:26,378 --> 00:19:28,369 and it's come to that point 408 00:19:28,438 --> 00:19:31,407 where I can't even look at myself in the mirror. 409 00:19:31,475 --> 00:19:34,377 So I want a new style that says I'm not a giant turd of sin. 410 00:19:34,445 --> 00:19:36,402 Well, it's not your fault 411 00:19:36,471 --> 00:19:39,440 that you fell in love with a married man. - Yeah, that's what I thought at first, 412 00:19:39,508 --> 00:19:41,432 and then I realized that's stupid. 413 00:19:41,499 --> 00:19:43,490 I mean, what about his poor wife? 414 00:19:43,559 --> 00:19:45,549 Well, maybe she doesn't love him enough. 415 00:19:45,617 --> 00:19:48,452 Oh, no. She does. She loves him plenty. 416 00:19:48,521 --> 00:19:51,253 So you want to take the bangs up a little bit? 417 00:19:51,322 --> 00:19:53,684 And he has kids-- two adorable little kids. 418 00:19:53,753 --> 00:19:55,202 That's sad, 419 00:19:55,271 --> 00:19:58,207 but sometimes you just have to look out for yourself. 420 00:19:58,275 --> 00:20:01,211 Well, maybe I am tired of being that kind of selfish bitch. 421 00:20:01,279 --> 00:20:03,202 Have you ever considered, uh, highlights? 422 00:20:03,271 --> 00:20:05,194 Focus, Shayla! We are talking about 423 00:20:05,263 --> 00:20:07,557 how I'm ruining innocent people's lives. 424 00:20:07,625 --> 00:20:11,100 Gaby, you seem like a lovely, warm person. 425 00:20:11,169 --> 00:20:12,653 Stop beating yourself up. 426 00:20:12,722 --> 00:20:15,555 Oh, for God sakes, you bleached blonde twit. 427 00:20:15,624 --> 00:20:18,256 I'm not talking about me. I'm talking about you and Bradley. 428 00:20:18,324 --> 00:20:21,733 What? What--what is this? Who--who are you? 429 00:20:21,801 --> 00:20:23,724 I'm a friend of Maria's, who, by the way, 430 00:20:23,793 --> 00:20:25,850 happens to be a warm and lovely person. 431 00:20:25,919 --> 00:20:28,315 Well, maybe she is, but Brad doesn't love her. 432 00:20:28,383 --> 00:20:30,306 He says he's gonna leave her. 433 00:20:30,374 --> 00:20:33,512 Oh, Shayla, he's lying. She's pregnant. 434 00:20:33,581 --> 00:20:36,415 That's impossible. They haven't had sex in over a year. 435 00:20:36,484 --> 00:20:38,103 Well, call the Vatican, 436 00:20:38,172 --> 00:20:41,107 'cause we're gonna need a manger and some hay. 437 00:20:41,176 --> 00:20:44,516 Get out. - I'm just trying to protect you here. 438 00:20:44,585 --> 00:20:47,317 I said get out now. 439 00:20:49,850 --> 00:20:52,279 Okay, let's just take a deep breath here-- 440 00:20:52,348 --> 00:20:55,317 Let's not do anything we're gonna regret. 441 00:20:55,386 --> 00:20:58,389 Now. 442 00:21:05,276 --> 00:21:09,359 This is why people should never get their hair cut in a mall! 443 00:21:16,705 --> 00:21:19,606 Mwah. Ohh. You couldn't shave? 444 00:21:21,329 --> 00:21:23,522 Come on, Tom. You need to look nice. 445 00:21:23,589 --> 00:21:26,492 Bree's going to a lot of trouble for this dinner. 446 00:21:26,560 --> 00:21:29,023 What, is she debuting a new salmon puff? 447 00:21:29,091 --> 00:21:31,116 Okay. I was going to wait 448 00:21:31,184 --> 00:21:33,613 to tell you this when you were in a good mood, 449 00:21:33,682 --> 00:21:35,740 but I realize that's not gonna happen, 450 00:21:35,808 --> 00:21:38,042 so Bree has a special guest tonight, her publisher... 451 00:21:38,043 --> 00:21:38,373 - Mm-hmm. 452 00:21:38,442 --> 00:21:40,330 And as luck would have it, 453 00:21:40,399 --> 00:21:42,963 he's looking to hire a new marketing executive. 454 00:21:43,032 --> 00:21:44,955 Oh, my God. What are you-- 455 00:21:45,023 --> 00:21:47,183 are you tricking me into a job interview? 456 00:21:47,250 --> 00:21:50,186 I'll find something, okay? I just need some time. 457 00:21:50,255 --> 00:21:52,178 You're grieving. I get it. 458 00:21:52,247 --> 00:21:55,216 But this sounds like a fantastic job. 459 00:21:55,285 --> 00:21:58,693 Please just hear the guy out and make a nice... 460 00:21:58,761 --> 00:21:59,739 impression. 461 00:21:59,807 --> 00:22:02,000 Fine. I'll shave. 462 00:22:02,068 --> 00:22:04,464 And brush your teeth. My eyes are watering. 463 00:22:04,532 --> 00:22:06,726 Oh. 464 00:22:06,794 --> 00:22:09,493 And don't just wet the toothbrush. 465 00:22:09,562 --> 00:22:12,498 I can tell. 466 00:22:17,257 --> 00:22:18,640 Bruce. - Hello. 467 00:22:18,709 --> 00:22:20,632 Hi. Come on in. - Hi. 468 00:22:20,701 --> 00:22:20,968 Hi. 469 00:22:20,969 --> 00:22:23,636 Thank you so much for joining us tonight. 470 00:22:23,704 --> 00:22:25,256 May I take your coat? 471 00:22:25,325 --> 00:22:26,910 Sure. Let me. 472 00:22:26,979 --> 00:22:29,576 Oh, wait. Let me get my "brain" out of there. 473 00:22:29,645 --> 00:22:31,636 I never go anywhere without this. 474 00:22:31,704 --> 00:22:33,661 That way, when I get a bright idea-- 475 00:22:33,729 --> 00:22:35,821 wham! Right into the tape recorder. 476 00:22:35,890 --> 00:22:38,555 Huh. Sounds like quite a handy gizmo. - Thank you, Orville. 477 00:22:38,624 --> 00:22:40,074 It's Orson. 478 00:22:40,142 --> 00:22:43,213 Orville, Orson--either way, he came home from the playground 479 00:22:43,281 --> 00:22:46,419 covered in bruises. Am I right? 480 00:22:46,488 --> 00:22:47,904 Idea for children's book-- 481 00:22:47,973 --> 00:22:50,065 kid who gets the crap kicked out of him 482 00:22:50,134 --> 00:22:52,401 'cause he has a goofy name. Could be "Orson." 483 00:22:53,137 --> 00:22:55,094 Oh, that's them. Wait till you meet Tom. 484 00:22:55,163 --> 00:22:57,592 You'll be so glad you had that tape recorder. 485 00:22:57,660 --> 00:23:00,090 He's just bursting with ideas. 486 00:23:00,158 --> 00:23:02,081 Hi. - Lynette, Tom, hi. 487 00:23:02,150 --> 00:23:02,717 Hey. 488 00:23:02,718 --> 00:23:05,085 I'd like you to meet my publisher, Bruce. 489 00:23:05,154 --> 00:23:07,381 It's nice to meet you. 490 00:23:07,449 --> 00:23:11,026 Hey. Bree, I'm getting a beer, if you don't mind. 491 00:23:15,111 --> 00:23:17,878 Hey, Katherine. 492 00:23:17,947 --> 00:23:19,903 Mike is standing across the street 493 00:23:19,972 --> 00:23:21,895 watching to make sure I apologize, 494 00:23:21,963 --> 00:23:24,898 even though it's clear to me you're the one who should 495 00:23:24,967 --> 00:23:26,890 be apologizing for the way you ruined my party. 496 00:23:26,959 --> 00:23:28,443 One, two, three. 497 00:23:28,511 --> 00:23:31,211 Well, that should be long enough, so here. 498 00:23:31,279 --> 00:23:33,471 Kiss my ass. Bye. 499 00:23:33,540 --> 00:23:35,125 Hold on. 500 00:23:36,984 --> 00:23:39,176 I'm sorry. 501 00:23:39,245 --> 00:23:42,990 But neither of us exactly gets a gold star for model behavior. 502 00:23:43,059 --> 00:23:44,644 It's not the same. 503 00:23:44,712 --> 00:23:47,446 Why not? I mean, you loved that painting 504 00:23:47,514 --> 00:23:49,809 until you found out that I did it, 505 00:23:49,877 --> 00:23:51,799 and then you acted totally petty. 506 00:23:51,868 --> 00:23:54,365 So why am I the only bad guy here? 507 00:23:59,733 --> 00:24:02,533 Let me ask you something, okay? 508 00:24:02,602 --> 00:24:05,167 Didn't it give you just the tiniest little thrill 509 00:24:05,234 --> 00:24:06,652 to tell me that 510 00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:09,925 that painting that I was so happy about was yours? 511 00:24:09,994 --> 00:24:12,119 That I had something in my house 512 00:24:12,188 --> 00:24:14,617 that represented the love between you and Mike? 513 00:24:14,686 --> 00:24:16,372 No. 514 00:24:16,441 --> 00:24:19,275 Then what are you doing, Susan? 515 00:24:19,344 --> 00:24:22,043 Can't you see how hard this is for me? 516 00:24:22,112 --> 00:24:24,305 You live right across the street. 517 00:24:24,373 --> 00:24:26,768 You guys share a kid. 518 00:24:26,837 --> 00:24:29,806 Do I have to have a painting of your honeymoon, too? 519 00:24:31,900 --> 00:24:33,992 Look, I knew I wasn't going to get 520 00:24:34,061 --> 00:24:36,219 a clean slate with Mike, okay? 521 00:24:36,288 --> 00:24:39,831 I just wanted a clean mantelpiece. 522 00:24:49,924 --> 00:24:52,252 Oh. 523 00:24:52,321 --> 00:24:55,526 Fantastic dinner, Bree. This was a great idea. 524 00:24:55,594 --> 00:24:58,530 Well, I just wanted to get you together with Tom here. 525 00:24:58,599 --> 00:25:00,555 I thought you two might hit it off. 526 00:25:00,624 --> 00:25:04,335 Yeah. Tom, Bree says you used to be quite the ad wiz. 527 00:25:04,404 --> 00:25:06,597 Oh, I don't know. 528 00:25:06,666 --> 00:25:09,770 He's being modest. He was the best. 529 00:25:09,838 --> 00:25:11,322 Good, because I'm looking 530 00:25:11,391 --> 00:25:13,820 for someone to head up a new division. 531 00:25:13,889 --> 00:25:16,014 I'm going to put some coffee on. 532 00:25:16,083 --> 00:25:18,883 Orson, would you give me a hand? 533 00:25:18,952 --> 00:25:20,571 Let these three chat. 534 00:25:23,981 --> 00:25:26,241 So do you think you have any interest 535 00:25:26,310 --> 00:25:28,369 in getting back in the game? 536 00:25:28,437 --> 00:25:29,854 I don't know. 537 00:25:29,922 --> 00:25:32,385 The timing's a little weird. 538 00:25:32,454 --> 00:25:34,174 How so? 539 00:25:34,242 --> 00:25:35,659 I don't know. 540 00:25:35,727 --> 00:25:39,609 Well, Tom was just running a very successful restaurant, 541 00:25:39,676 --> 00:25:42,376 and he just sold it at a handsome profit. 542 00:25:42,444 --> 00:25:45,852 So he's waiting for the right opportunity. 543 00:25:45,921 --> 00:25:49,430 You might have to do a little selling here, Bruce. 544 00:25:49,499 --> 00:25:52,603 Huh. I guess the good ones are always the hardest to land. 545 00:25:52,672 --> 00:25:53,684 Yeah 546 00:25:53,752 --> 00:25:55,709 Let me give it a shot. 547 00:25:55,777 --> 00:25:57,565 We represent a small stable 548 00:25:57,633 --> 00:25:59,556 of elite nonfiction authors from all over the world. 549 00:25:59,625 --> 00:26:02,088 So you'd be working closely with those writers 550 00:26:02,157 --> 00:26:03,606 to come up with 551 00:26:03,675 --> 00:26:05,767 creative approaches to selling their books. 552 00:26:05,836 --> 00:26:08,906 That sounds... amazing. 553 00:26:08,975 --> 00:26:10,830 I don't know. 554 00:26:10,899 --> 00:26:12,484 Are there more potatoes? 555 00:26:12,552 --> 00:26:16,129 You can have mine. 556 00:26:16,198 --> 00:26:18,323 Stop saying, "I don't know." 557 00:26:19,910 --> 00:26:21,462 Mm. 558 00:26:21,531 --> 00:26:23,487 Sounds like there's a lot of traveling. 559 00:26:23,556 --> 00:26:26,830 I'm not, you know, really big on living out of a suitcase. 560 00:26:26,897 --> 00:26:29,226 Even to do two weeks at the book fair in Paris. 561 00:26:29,294 --> 00:26:31,689 While you stay at a five-star hotel? 562 00:26:31,758 --> 00:26:33,242 Paris? 563 00:26:33,311 --> 00:26:34,761 Like France? 564 00:26:34,829 --> 00:26:37,428 Yes, like the greatest city in the world. 565 00:26:37,496 --> 00:26:40,229 Gee, I'm getting Lynette excited. 566 00:26:40,298 --> 00:26:43,132 Too bad you don't have any advertising experience. 567 00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:44,989 Oh. 568 00:26:48,533 --> 00:26:51,976 Actually, I have 12 years of experience. 569 00:26:52,043 --> 00:26:53,630 Really? 570 00:26:53,697 --> 00:26:54,709 Yeah. 571 00:26:54,778 --> 00:26:57,140 I was account executive for eight years, 572 00:26:57,209 --> 00:26:59,907 V.P. for four more after that, 573 00:26:59,976 --> 00:27:02,067 and by the way, I wrote my graduate thesis 574 00:27:02,136 --> 00:27:05,410 on the rise of the nonfiction novel. 575 00:27:05,477 --> 00:27:06,895 W-wow. 576 00:27:06,963 --> 00:27:10,539 I know. So what kind of starting salary are we talking about? 577 00:27:10,608 --> 00:27:13,847 Lynette, can I see you for a sec? 578 00:27:13,916 --> 00:27:16,311 Okay. Bruce, could you hold that thought? 579 00:27:16,380 --> 00:27:19,248 I'm gonna be right back. 580 00:27:21,105 --> 00:27:23,197 Well, we're on pins and needles. 581 00:27:23,266 --> 00:27:26,066 How's it going? 582 00:27:26,135 --> 00:27:29,407 What the hell are you doing? - I'm getting this job. That's what I'm doing. 583 00:27:29,476 --> 00:27:30,645 I thought it was my job. 584 00:27:30,646 --> 00:27:33,020 Well, you're not acting like you want it very much, mister... 585 00:27:33,088 --> 00:27:35,349 "uh, I don't know. 586 00:27:35,417 --> 00:27:37,880 Are there any more potatoes?" - It's not that I don't want it. 587 00:27:37,948 --> 00:27:40,310 It's just that it's all happening so fast. 588 00:27:40,379 --> 00:27:44,192 I need a little time to lick my wounds. - Okay, you lick. I'm going to Paris. 589 00:27:44,261 --> 00:27:46,926 You're not taking my job. 590 00:27:46,994 --> 00:27:49,424 Your job? The one you're magically gonna get by sulking 591 00:27:49,493 --> 00:27:52,563 and acting like a brat? You had a shot. You blew it. 592 00:27:52,632 --> 00:27:54,250 Oh, yeah? - Yeah. 593 00:27:54,319 --> 00:27:58,335 You just messed with the bull, sister. 594 00:27:58,403 --> 00:28:00,798 Prepare to get the horns. 595 00:28:02,386 --> 00:28:04,646 I... ugh! 596 00:28:04,715 --> 00:28:07,043 Maybe we should slice the tart in here. 597 00:28:07,111 --> 00:28:10,013 I don't want to bring a large knife into this. 598 00:28:16,430 --> 00:28:18,758 Bruce... 599 00:28:18,827 --> 00:28:20,750 I was just saying to Lynette, 600 00:28:20,819 --> 00:28:23,754 I gave you my "I don't really care about this job" thing 601 00:28:23,822 --> 00:28:26,116 to see if you really care about this job, 602 00:28:26,185 --> 00:28:29,255 and you do, and I like that. 603 00:28:29,324 --> 00:28:31,078 Clever. 604 00:28:31,147 --> 00:28:33,205 Now we haven't talked compensation package yet, 605 00:28:33,273 --> 00:28:35,230 but I got a good feeling-- 606 00:28:35,299 --> 00:28:38,234 You know, Tom, you're right. Bruce does care about this job. 607 00:28:38,303 --> 00:28:40,596 That's why he wants to make sure 608 00:28:40,665 --> 00:28:43,061 he gets the perfect person for it. 609 00:28:43,129 --> 00:28:45,558 Well, Lynette, you yourself said I was the best. 610 00:28:45,627 --> 00:28:49,305 Oh, you were. You were the best person who ever worked for me. 611 00:28:49,374 --> 00:28:52,646 I used to be his boss. 612 00:28:54,740 --> 00:28:57,709 This is not what I had in mind. - I don't know 613 00:28:57,778 --> 00:29:00,361 why either one of them wants to work for that jackass. 614 00:29:00,362 --> 00:29:02,098 Now, now. He's been very good to me. 615 00:29:02,166 --> 00:29:04,089 Well, of course he has, 616 00:29:04,157 --> 00:29:06,115 because he knows you make him a lot of money. 617 00:29:06,182 --> 00:29:09,085 Me, on the other hand, he sees as an insignificant little man, 618 00:29:09,154 --> 00:29:10,603 barely worth mentioning 619 00:29:10,672 --> 00:29:15,127 as he talks into his annoying, penis-shaped tape recorder. 620 00:29:15,195 --> 00:29:16,814 So I said to him, 621 00:29:16,883 --> 00:29:20,527 "je crois que c'est l'homme qui fait Les chez d'oeuvres." 622 00:29:20,596 --> 00:29:23,092 And he said to me, "non, Lynette. 623 00:29:23,161 --> 00:29:26,771 Ce sont Les chez d'oeuvres qui font l'homme." 624 00:29:26,840 --> 00:29:30,214 Great story... I assume. 625 00:29:30,283 --> 00:29:33,286 I don't speak another language, but I've had ad campaigns 626 00:29:33,355 --> 00:29:35,379 translated into 12 different ones, 627 00:29:35,447 --> 00:29:37,910 including Professor Crispy's potato chips. 628 00:29:37,979 --> 00:29:39,969 I love that campaign. You did that? 629 00:29:40,037 --> 00:29:41,319 I did. 630 00:29:41,388 --> 00:29:44,155 Yes. Tom was very good at his job, 631 00:29:44,223 --> 00:29:47,665 right up until he got fired. 632 00:29:47,734 --> 00:29:50,973 Well, actually, I was relieved to get fired. 633 00:29:51,041 --> 00:29:52,998 My boss was kind of a ballbuster. 634 00:29:53,067 --> 00:29:55,766 Oops. She's right here. 635 00:29:55,834 --> 00:29:58,601 Je regrette. 636 00:30:01,774 --> 00:30:03,934 Oh. Would anyone care for something sweet? 637 00:30:04,003 --> 00:30:06,027 I know I would. 638 00:30:13,993 --> 00:30:17,705 Well, we've all had our troubles as bosses, haven't we, Tom? 639 00:30:17,774 --> 00:30:19,730 I was sort of sugarcoating it 640 00:30:19,799 --> 00:30:22,295 when I said his restaurant was very successful. 641 00:30:22,364 --> 00:30:24,793 The truth is, he mismanaged that pizza joint 642 00:30:24,862 --> 00:30:26,583 right into the ground. 643 00:30:28,170 --> 00:30:29,654 Let me be very clear. 644 00:30:29,723 --> 00:30:31,747 I think Lynette is fantastic. 645 00:30:31,816 --> 00:30:34,042 She is a great manager, 646 00:30:34,111 --> 00:30:36,033 She's got terrific people skills 647 00:30:36,102 --> 00:30:37,755 and is very reliable... 648 00:30:37,823 --> 00:30:41,130 As long as the cancer doesn't flare up again. 649 00:30:44,776 --> 00:30:48,759 You know what? 650 00:30:48,826 --> 00:30:50,345 It's getting late. 651 00:30:50,414 --> 00:30:54,057 I should probably hit the road. 652 00:30:54,126 --> 00:30:56,758 But what about the job? 653 00:30:56,826 --> 00:30:58,243 Yeah... 654 00:30:58,311 --> 00:31:01,450 I just started looking. I'm sure it's gonna be a long process, 655 00:31:01,518 --> 00:31:05,095 but trust me, you've certainly made an impression. 656 00:31:07,222 --> 00:31:09,821 I'll get your coat. 657 00:31:11,577 --> 00:31:13,769 Oh, it's a shame you can't stay for dessert. 658 00:31:13,872 --> 00:31:15,322 I've made Tarte Tatin. 659 00:31:15,391 --> 00:31:17,584 Idea for novel-- 660 00:31:17,653 --> 00:31:21,769 woman who's married to a gay man and doesn't know it. 661 00:31:23,120 --> 00:31:26,630 Well, thanks again. 662 00:31:28,049 --> 00:31:31,051 I don't know when I've had such an interesting evening. 663 00:31:31,120 --> 00:31:33,853 I'll call you tomorrow. We'll talk about your friends. 664 00:31:36,622 --> 00:31:38,409 Uh, Bruce, 665 00:31:38,478 --> 00:31:41,867 why don't I wrap up a piece of that tart to go? 666 00:31:41,868 --> 00:31:42,291 Yeah. 667 00:31:45,465 --> 00:31:47,388 Give it. 668 00:31:47,456 --> 00:31:49,852 Give what? - Bruce's tape recorder. 669 00:31:49,920 --> 00:31:52,384 I don't know what-- - You took it. I saw you. 670 00:31:52,452 --> 00:31:55,219 Hey. Has anybody seen my tape recorder? 671 00:31:55,287 --> 00:31:58,189 It was right here. - I'll look. 672 00:31:58,258 --> 00:32:00,417 Hey. 673 00:32:00,485 --> 00:32:01,936 Ah. 674 00:32:02,004 --> 00:32:03,489 Stop. 675 00:32:03,557 --> 00:32:06,762 I don't have it. - Ooh! What do you call this? 676 00:32:06,831 --> 00:32:09,192 Uh, Bruce is looking for, uh... 677 00:32:12,501 --> 00:32:15,032 Never mind. 678 00:32:16,518 --> 00:32:18,914 We will talk about this later. 679 00:32:20,670 --> 00:32:26,103 Oh. Look what got brought in with the dirty napkins. 680 00:32:26,172 --> 00:32:27,791 Thanks. 681 00:32:36,467 --> 00:32:39,638 Hello, Gaby. - Ooh! 682 00:32:39,707 --> 00:32:41,698 Jeez, Bradley, you scared me! 683 00:32:41,765 --> 00:32:45,309 You talked to Shayla. - Yeah, she's a real gem. 684 00:32:45,378 --> 00:32:47,671 You shouldn't have done that. We have a deal. 685 00:32:47,706 --> 00:32:49,663 Well, I'm tired of the deal, 686 00:32:49,732 --> 00:32:52,633 And what you're doing to Maria is despicable. 687 00:32:52,702 --> 00:32:54,625 Hey. You're in no position to judge me. 688 00:32:54,693 --> 00:32:58,000 Don't forget, I was working with Carlos when you cheated on him. 689 00:32:58,068 --> 00:33:00,970 Yeah, well, I'm not that person anymore. 690 00:33:01,039 --> 00:33:02,455 I've changed. 691 00:33:02,524 --> 00:33:04,177 Right. You're worse. 692 00:33:04,246 --> 00:33:06,506 You're so worried about Maria 693 00:33:06,575 --> 00:33:08,768 until there's money or vacation time at stake. 694 00:33:08,835 --> 00:33:11,299 Then you're only worried about Gaby. 695 00:33:11,367 --> 00:33:13,627 You know what? You're right. 696 00:33:13,696 --> 00:33:15,788 I'm out. 697 00:33:15,857 --> 00:33:17,982 What do you mean? - Deal's over. 698 00:33:18,050 --> 00:33:20,344 I'm not covering for your stupid little fling anymore. 699 00:33:20,413 --> 00:33:22,336 It's not a fling. I love her. 700 00:33:22,405 --> 00:33:25,306 She's the most incredible woman I've ever met. 701 00:33:25,375 --> 00:33:27,298 Shayla? She has a Hello Kitty tip jar. 702 00:33:27,367 --> 00:33:30,235 Well, she makes me happy. I can't give her up. 703 00:33:30,303 --> 00:33:33,374 Well, at least be man enough to tell Maria, 704 00:33:33,442 --> 00:33:35,702 because if you don't, I will. 705 00:33:37,526 --> 00:33:38,977 All right, fine. 706 00:33:39,046 --> 00:33:40,732 I will tell Maria. 707 00:33:40,801 --> 00:33:42,825 And you can tell Carlos 708 00:33:42,893 --> 00:33:47,517 to bring a box to work on Monday 'cause he's fired. 709 00:33:58,656 --> 00:34:00,511 So dinner... 710 00:34:02,707 --> 00:34:04,089 Wow. 711 00:34:04,157 --> 00:34:07,093 Lynette, I will regret for the rest of my life 712 00:34:07,162 --> 00:34:08,612 what I said tonight. 713 00:34:08,680 --> 00:34:11,312 I... I don't know what's going on with me. 714 00:34:11,381 --> 00:34:13,709 I do, and it's okay. 715 00:34:13,777 --> 00:34:16,882 Besides, did you hear what came out of my mouth? 716 00:34:16,950 --> 00:34:19,312 Like I said... wow. 717 00:34:19,381 --> 00:34:22,451 Wouldn't you love to hear what Bruce said 718 00:34:22,520 --> 00:34:25,151 into his tape recorder on the ride home? 719 00:34:26,638 --> 00:34:28,729 "Idea-- check local mental hospital 720 00:34:28,798 --> 00:34:30,484 for escaped married couple." 721 00:34:41,827 --> 00:34:43,581 So... 722 00:34:43,649 --> 00:34:47,361 were you serious about wanting to go back to work? 723 00:34:51,277 --> 00:34:53,470 I was talking about that job tonight 724 00:34:53,539 --> 00:34:55,833 and trying to convince Bruce I was good, 725 00:34:55,901 --> 00:34:58,634 and I remembered something. I am good. 726 00:34:58,703 --> 00:35:02,988 And I would like another chance to prove it. 727 00:35:03,057 --> 00:35:05,824 Okay. 728 00:35:05,893 --> 00:35:07,950 Really? 729 00:35:08,019 --> 00:35:12,204 Yeah. We did my thing for seven years. 730 00:35:12,272 --> 00:35:13,790 Now it's your turn. 731 00:35:15,478 --> 00:35:16,861 Oh! Mwah. 732 00:35:19,428 --> 00:35:22,194 Do you know how embarrassed I would have been 733 00:35:22,263 --> 00:35:24,220 if Bruce had seen you take it? 734 00:35:24,288 --> 00:35:26,853 He deserved it. He insulted me. 735 00:35:26,920 --> 00:35:29,586 So say something. Stand up to him. But stealing? 736 00:35:29,655 --> 00:35:32,557 Honestly, Orson, why would you do something like that? 737 00:35:32,625 --> 00:35:35,290 I don't know, Bree. 738 00:35:35,359 --> 00:35:38,295 I don't. Here's something I do know-- 739 00:35:38,364 --> 00:35:40,287 When I was a successful dentist, 740 00:35:40,354 --> 00:35:43,628 no one spoke to me the way they do now. 741 00:35:43,697 --> 00:35:46,193 When I lost my practice, I lost people's respect. 742 00:35:46,262 --> 00:35:49,130 And you hope to earn it back through larceny? 743 00:35:49,198 --> 00:35:51,121 You haven't walked in my shoes. 744 00:35:51,190 --> 00:35:54,395 Tom lost his job. Everyone jumped to his rescue. 745 00:35:54,464 --> 00:35:56,150 Even you-- 746 00:35:56,219 --> 00:35:59,120 bending over backwards trying to get him a job. 747 00:35:59,189 --> 00:36:01,483 I don't need to walk in your shoes, Orson. 748 00:36:01,552 --> 00:36:04,453 What you did was embarrassing and childish, 749 00:36:04,522 --> 00:36:06,884 and it's never gonna happen again. 750 00:36:06,952 --> 00:36:08,875 Understood? 751 00:36:43,845 --> 00:36:46,172 See you. Thank you. 752 00:36:46,241 --> 00:36:49,210 Father? - Yes. Can I help you? 753 00:36:49,279 --> 00:36:52,215 Oh, I hope so. I, uh, saw you the other night 754 00:36:52,283 --> 00:36:54,206 when you were buying your lottery ticket. 755 00:36:54,274 --> 00:36:56,232 I was with my husband Dave. 756 00:36:56,299 --> 00:36:58,222 Ah. 757 00:36:58,291 --> 00:37:01,091 Yes. He said that you barely know each other, 758 00:37:01,160 --> 00:37:03,421 but it didn't seem that way to me. 759 00:37:03,489 --> 00:37:05,750 And, well, 760 00:37:05,818 --> 00:37:09,091 he refuses to talk about his past, 761 00:37:09,160 --> 00:37:12,230 so if there is anything that you could tell me about him-- 762 00:37:12,299 --> 00:37:15,336 I'm not sure I can do that. 763 00:37:15,404 --> 00:37:18,474 Please. He has so many secrets, 764 00:37:18,543 --> 00:37:20,601 and I don't have anyone else to turn to. 765 00:37:20,670 --> 00:37:24,179 I wish I could help you, but... 766 00:37:24,248 --> 00:37:27,352 this is something you need to discuss with your husband. 767 00:37:27,420 --> 00:37:29,984 Well, if it was that easy, 768 00:37:30,053 --> 00:37:33,866 do you think that I would be here? - I'm sorry. 769 00:37:33,935 --> 00:37:38,727 Please know that my thoughts are with you both, Mrs. Dash. 770 00:37:38,795 --> 00:37:41,595 It's Williams. 771 00:37:41,664 --> 00:37:43,824 I'm too old-school for my own good. 772 00:37:43,892 --> 00:37:47,536 I shouldn't just assume that you took your husband's name. 773 00:37:47,605 --> 00:37:49,629 Anyway... 774 00:37:49,697 --> 00:37:52,599 Good luck, Mrs. Williams. 775 00:38:01,715 --> 00:38:04,650 Hey, Susan. I thought I had M.J. till 7:00. 776 00:38:04,718 --> 00:38:07,587 Uh, you do. I am here to take my painting back. 777 00:38:07,655 --> 00:38:09,881 But you gave it to me. It's mine. 778 00:38:09,950 --> 00:38:12,380 Well, now I'm ungiving it. Try to keep up. 779 00:38:12,448 --> 00:38:15,890 Okay, if this is about what happened at the housewarming... 780 00:38:15,958 --> 00:38:17,375 It is, actually, 781 00:38:17,444 --> 00:38:19,704 because that is when I decided 782 00:38:19,773 --> 00:38:24,160 that I don't want this piece of art that I slaved over 783 00:38:24,228 --> 00:38:26,455 hanging in the house you are sharing 784 00:38:26,523 --> 00:38:28,514 with your new girlfriend. Capisce? 785 00:38:28,582 --> 00:38:30,673 Okay, so the other night you were mad 786 00:38:30,742 --> 00:38:33,678 because it wasn't hanging up, but now you want to take it? 787 00:38:33,747 --> 00:38:36,682 Yep. I'm complicated like that. Aren't you glad you divorced me? 788 00:38:36,750 --> 00:38:39,956 If you two want a painting so bad, paint your own. 789 00:38:40,025 --> 00:38:41,542 Susan-- - Mayfair. 790 00:38:43,029 --> 00:38:44,850 Stay out of this. 791 00:38:47,855 --> 00:38:51,230 This is between me and my ex. 792 00:38:51,298 --> 00:38:52,816 Got it? 793 00:39:09,964 --> 00:39:11,346 Unbelievable. 794 00:39:15,499 --> 00:39:18,401 Anyway, I'm thinking a brighter color for the baby's room. 795 00:39:18,470 --> 00:39:20,763 Now I know it's a bit of a stretch, 796 00:39:20,832 --> 00:39:23,329 But how do you feel about turquoise? 797 00:39:26,638 --> 00:39:28,291 Sweetheart? 798 00:39:30,250 --> 00:39:32,274 We need to talk. 799 00:39:50,096 --> 00:39:52,154 What you reading? 800 00:39:52,223 --> 00:39:54,281 The want ads. 801 00:39:54,349 --> 00:39:57,352 Can't decide if I should be a data entry operator 802 00:39:57,421 --> 00:39:59,242 or join the Marines. 803 00:40:00,763 --> 00:40:02,179 I'm so sorry. 804 00:40:02,248 --> 00:40:05,183 Don't be. I told you, I hated working for that jackass. 805 00:40:05,252 --> 00:40:08,188 You did the right thing. I should have done it sooner. 806 00:40:08,255 --> 00:40:09,706 But you did it, 807 00:40:09,775 --> 00:40:12,710 Even though you knew you were gonna lose a lot of money. 808 00:40:12,779 --> 00:40:15,714 You're a good person, babe. I'm very proud of you. 809 00:40:15,783 --> 00:40:19,191 Well, that means a lot, coming from a United States marine. 810 00:40:19,259 --> 00:40:22,938 Mm. 811 00:40:24,727 --> 00:40:26,414 Hello? 812 00:40:26,482 --> 00:40:28,473 Maria. 813 00:40:28,542 --> 00:40:29,857 Calm down. 814 00:40:29,926 --> 00:40:31,814 Calm down. 815 00:40:33,638 --> 00:40:36,203 Okay, we're coming over. 816 00:40:37,790 --> 00:40:39,949 I guess Bradley told her. 817 00:40:45,249 --> 00:40:47,679 Thanks for coming. 818 00:40:47,747 --> 00:40:49,839 I didn't know who else to call. 819 00:40:51,460 --> 00:40:52,910 It was horrible. 820 00:40:52,979 --> 00:40:55,138 He just kept telling me he loves her. 821 00:40:55,206 --> 00:40:57,771 She's the best thing that ever happened to him. 822 00:40:57,839 --> 00:41:01,281 He finally understands what love means. 823 00:41:09,316 --> 00:41:12,048 I just wanted him to stop talking. 824 00:41:21,703 --> 00:41:23,964 You should never be too impressed 825 00:41:24,033 --> 00:41:26,664 by people with good manners. 826 00:41:26,732 --> 00:41:29,870 They're the ones who will give a friendly wave 827 00:41:29,939 --> 00:41:33,178 even when they've stolen from you... 828 00:41:34,800 --> 00:41:38,174 they're the type to sweetly welcome you... 829 00:41:38,242 --> 00:41:41,988 even as they try to uncover your secrets... 830 00:41:45,836 --> 00:41:50,291 They're the kind to offer you coffee, 831 00:41:50,360 --> 00:41:54,814 even as they report you to the police. 832 00:41:57,954 --> 00:42:03,961 And don't be too offended by someone who's openly rude... 833 00:42:04,030 --> 00:42:06,628 because they may be that way 834 00:42:06,696 --> 00:42:10,341 for the nicest of reasons. 835 00:42:10,342 --> 00:42:11,342 Subtitles by LeapinLar