1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:02,610 Previously on Desperate Housewives... 2 00:00:02,780 --> 00:00:06,565 Danielle had her baby on Halloween... 3 00:00:06,570 --> 00:00:08,620 You said my father didn't care about me. 4 00:00:08,655 --> 00:00:10,760 Katherine revealed a secret... 5 00:00:10,900 --> 00:00:12,683 I want you to imagine the worst thing 6 00:00:12,684 --> 00:00:14,606 that a father can do to his daughter. 7 00:00:14,607 --> 00:00:16,135 Lynette got great news... 8 00:00:16,170 --> 00:00:18,620 I got the test results back. You're clean. 9 00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:22,147 While Mike tried to ease his pain... 10 00:00:22,626 --> 00:00:24,390 - Victor... - You know what my dream is? 11 00:00:24,535 --> 00:00:26,082 Reached out to Gaby... 12 00:00:26,180 --> 00:00:28,389 You. Don't run away, Gaby. 13 00:00:28,395 --> 00:00:30,627 But if you do, take me with you. 14 00:00:30,859 --> 00:00:33,361 And Edie got revenge... 15 00:00:33,388 --> 00:00:35,080 Don't take it all out on Gaby. 16 00:00:35,225 --> 00:00:37,721 Carlos decided to make a fool out of you. 17 00:00:44,215 --> 00:00:47,152 The thing you need to know about Victor Lang... 18 00:00:47,156 --> 00:00:50,560 is that he was not above using deception... 19 00:00:51,285 --> 00:00:54,882 Whether it was an insincere promise to a campaign donor... 20 00:00:55,796 --> 00:00:59,340 Or the artful evasion of a reporter's question... 21 00:00:59,967 --> 00:01:03,261 Or an outright lie to his constituents... 22 00:01:03,265 --> 00:01:07,033 Victor did what he had to to get what he wanted... 23 00:01:07,925 --> 00:01:10,650 But thanks to some compromising photos... 24 00:01:10,705 --> 00:01:15,022 he learned that his wife knew a little something about deception... 25 00:01:15,025 --> 00:01:16,133 as well... 26 00:01:26,817 --> 00:01:29,032 For the last time, Carlos, stop calling me. 27 00:01:29,217 --> 00:01:31,121 I told you, I just wanna talk. 28 00:01:31,126 --> 00:01:32,592 And I told you, it's over. 29 00:01:32,618 --> 00:01:35,181 So what, you're just gonna go back to that chicken-lipped albino? 30 00:01:35,258 --> 00:01:37,720 I don't know, I'm taking it one day at a time. 31 00:01:37,768 --> 00:01:39,241 But what I can say about Victor 32 00:01:39,247 --> 00:01:41,783 is he doesn't lie to me about how much money he's got. 33 00:01:41,785 --> 00:01:44,301 Look... I said I was sorry. 34 00:01:46,115 --> 00:01:47,053 That's great. 35 00:01:47,058 --> 00:01:48,943 Yeah, well, I gotta go... Bree. 36 00:01:50,608 --> 00:01:51,950 It's Bree. 37 00:01:53,746 --> 00:01:54,591 Okay, so... 38 00:01:54,595 --> 00:01:57,613 I just informed my staff that I'm taking the next month off 39 00:01:57,717 --> 00:01:59,820 to give my wife the honeymoon she always wanted. 40 00:01:59,828 --> 00:02:02,133 That's amazing! Where should we go? 41 00:02:02,148 --> 00:02:04,321 Well, I left some travel magazines in the bedroom. 42 00:02:04,326 --> 00:02:05,841 Why don't you go get 'em? 43 00:02:19,865 --> 00:02:21,083 Oh, my God, Victor. 44 00:02:21,125 --> 00:02:23,873 A month in Rio sounds like heaven, doesn't it? 45 00:02:24,395 --> 00:02:26,071 It does, let's do it. 46 00:02:27,037 --> 00:02:29,942 Hey, why don't we kick off our reconciliation 47 00:02:29,945 --> 00:02:31,961 with a little weekend on a boat? 48 00:02:32,138 --> 00:02:34,363 That's so romantic, I love that. 49 00:02:34,506 --> 00:02:37,313 Just you and me, all alone, out in the middle of the ocean. 50 00:02:37,766 --> 00:02:39,390 The girls are gonna be so jealous. 51 00:02:39,436 --> 00:02:41,633 Oh, no, no, no, let's not tell anyone we're going. 52 00:02:41,768 --> 00:02:43,531 It'll be our little secret. 53 00:02:45,405 --> 00:02:51,161 Yes, Victor was not above using deception to get what he wanted... 54 00:02:51,718 --> 00:02:53,903 And what he wanted now... 55 00:02:54,257 --> 00:02:55,943 was revenge... 56 00:02:56,496 --> 00:03:00,211 Desperate Housewives 4x7 You Can't Judge a Book by Its Cover 57 00:03:08,318 --> 00:03:13,181 The next day on Wisteria Lane began with a bit of deceit... 58 00:03:13,568 --> 00:03:17,711 Bree Hodge told her friends she had given birth in the middle of the night... 59 00:03:17,715 --> 00:03:20,351 to a beautiful baby boy... 60 00:03:20,568 --> 00:03:24,423 And thanks to the healthy lungs of Benjamin Tyson Hodge... 62 00:03:24,745 --> 00:03:27,793 it didn't take long for Bree's friends... 63 00:03:27,796 --> 00:03:30,700 to engage in some deceit of their own... 64 00:03:30,866 --> 00:03:33,200 Well, he's just a little piece of heaven. 65 00:03:33,656 --> 00:03:35,810 You're so blessed. 66 00:03:36,246 --> 00:03:37,993 Makes me wanna have another one myself. 67 00:03:38,037 --> 00:03:40,190 Orson, you better take Benjamin to the other room 68 00:03:40,205 --> 00:03:42,721 before my friends run out of lies. 69 00:03:42,775 --> 00:03:44,042 No. 70 00:03:44,048 --> 00:03:47,483 They don't appreciate a healthy pair of lungs, that's all, huh? 71 00:03:47,686 --> 00:03:48,740 Come on, Benjamin. 72 00:03:48,746 --> 00:03:50,870 Hey, Lynette, you tell everyone your news? 73 00:03:50,908 --> 00:03:53,052 No, this is about the baby... 74 00:03:53,056 --> 00:03:54,711 Wait, did you have that final scan? 75 00:03:54,716 --> 00:03:55,631 Did you hear something? 76 00:03:55,676 --> 00:03:59,221 The results are back, and while you can never actually say you're cured... 77 00:03:59,225 --> 00:04:00,340 She's cured! 78 00:04:03,386 --> 00:04:05,273 I have to get checked every six months, 79 00:04:05,277 --> 00:04:08,340 but yes, the doctor is very optimistic. 80 00:04:08,348 --> 00:04:10,842 Hey, what the hell is all this racket? 81 00:04:10,985 --> 00:04:12,663 Someone win the loto? 82 00:04:12,708 --> 00:04:16,441 Oh, I was just telling everybody the good news about my... 83 00:04:18,646 --> 00:04:19,861 cancer. 84 00:04:20,487 --> 00:04:22,492 Hey, congrats! 85 00:04:22,646 --> 00:04:24,373 I'm a survivor myself. 86 00:04:24,446 --> 00:04:25,633 Prostate. 87 00:04:25,638 --> 00:04:26,760 Oh, muffins. 88 00:04:26,806 --> 00:04:29,200 Hey, show some class. Introduce yourself. 89 00:04:29,567 --> 00:04:31,152 Hi. I'm Stan. 90 00:04:34,727 --> 00:04:36,301 Is that my robe? 91 00:04:37,098 --> 00:04:38,783 Yeah. Sorry... 92 00:04:39,195 --> 00:04:41,990 If I knew when I walked into that card club last night 93 00:04:41,998 --> 00:04:44,590 that I would be going home with this lovely lady, 94 00:04:44,725 --> 00:04:46,822 I'd have packed me a change of clothes. 95 00:04:50,688 --> 00:04:52,221 Okay, I get it. 96 00:04:52,257 --> 00:04:53,972 We'll get out of your area. 97 00:04:54,635 --> 00:04:55,711 Come on, handsome. 98 00:04:55,716 --> 00:04:56,970 Let's take a shower. 99 00:05:04,455 --> 00:05:06,120 Mike, how long are you gonna be? 100 00:05:06,167 --> 00:05:09,142 We've gotta get this food over to Bree's before it gets cold. 101 00:05:09,297 --> 00:05:11,432 You know, Susan, I don't feel like going over there tonight. 102 00:05:11,447 --> 00:05:13,092 Can't you just drop it off? 103 00:05:13,355 --> 00:05:15,201 No, they just had a baby. 104 00:05:15,208 --> 00:05:18,341 We're gonna "ooh", we're gonna "ahh" and then we're gonna eat. 105 00:05:18,606 --> 00:05:20,060 But I'm tired. 106 00:05:20,226 --> 00:05:22,671 I worked all day. I got a job first thing in the morning. 107 00:05:22,676 --> 00:05:24,153 There's no way out of it, Mike. 108 00:05:24,155 --> 00:05:26,723 Just put down your damn face and meet me downstairs. 109 00:05:26,836 --> 00:05:28,930 This is what we do in the suburbs. 110 00:05:35,278 --> 00:05:36,460 Ah, yes... 111 00:05:37,777 --> 00:05:39,213 The suburbs... 112 00:05:43,405 --> 00:05:45,751 And how does Danielle like her baby brother? 113 00:05:46,476 --> 00:05:48,101 Oh, she... adores him. 114 00:05:48,146 --> 00:05:51,503 She just felt terrible that she had to leave for school so soon. 115 00:05:51,877 --> 00:05:53,250 Speaking of which... 116 00:05:53,255 --> 00:05:56,802 We have some extra preschool applications if the two of you are interested. 117 00:05:56,827 --> 00:05:58,423 Isn't it a little early to be talking preschool? 118 00:05:58,458 --> 00:06:02,080 She just got pregnant. Our baby still looks like a sea horse. 119 00:06:02,126 --> 00:06:04,963 Oh, honey, you'd be surprised how fast the best schools fill up. 120 00:06:04,988 --> 00:06:07,130 And only the best for our kid, right? 121 00:06:07,296 --> 00:06:11,111 Then start saving your pennies, Bonny Briar's up to $10, 000 a year. 122 00:06:11,846 --> 00:06:13,333 10, 000 dollars?! 123 00:06:13,715 --> 00:06:16,453 For used legos and a potty chair? 124 00:06:16,987 --> 00:06:18,532 And you'd better apply now. 125 00:06:18,556 --> 00:06:21,061 Debbie Gottlieb had her baby the same day I did 126 00:06:21,077 --> 00:06:24,281 and she could only get wait-listed at her first three choices. 127 00:06:24,927 --> 00:06:27,601 Oh, by the way, we were invited to her bris this Saturday. 128 00:06:27,607 --> 00:06:29,330 Well, make an excuse for me. 129 00:06:29,388 --> 00:06:30,780 I thought you liked Debbie and Lou. 130 00:06:30,856 --> 00:06:31,962 I do. 131 00:06:32,138 --> 00:06:35,441 I just don't care to watch them ritually mutilate their child. 132 00:06:35,806 --> 00:06:37,152 More moo shu, please. 133 00:06:38,807 --> 00:06:40,410 Circumcision's not mutilation. 134 00:06:40,457 --> 00:06:44,262 It's a simple surgery meant to promote lifelong masculine hygiene. 135 00:06:44,267 --> 00:06:46,472 It's a tromatic... procedure. 136 00:06:46,475 --> 00:06:51,003 Which reduces the male's capacity for sexual pleasure by desensitizing the tip... 137 00:06:51,006 --> 00:06:53,082 We know... what it is. 138 00:06:55,188 --> 00:06:56,240 Gee... 139 00:06:56,247 --> 00:06:59,962 I don't think I've ever heard such strong opinions on the subject. 140 00:07:00,958 --> 00:07:03,172 I mean, not that it's something I talk about a lot... 141 00:07:03,737 --> 00:07:04,783 or ever. 142 00:07:06,487 --> 00:07:08,143 I hope I didn't offend you. 143 00:07:08,546 --> 00:07:10,800 I haven't heard a word since $10, 000. 144 00:07:12,295 --> 00:07:15,622 It's just that I remember my own circumcision so vividly. 145 00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:20,039 Oh, that's ridiculous. 146 00:07:20,075 --> 00:07:22,617 My parents disagreed on this issue, too. 147 00:07:22,649 --> 00:07:24,122 My Dad said no. 148 00:07:24,576 --> 00:07:26,893 So mother just bided her time 149 00:07:26,898 --> 00:07:29,352 until he finally left town on business. 150 00:07:29,976 --> 00:07:31,083 I was five. 151 00:07:33,897 --> 00:07:36,492 She told me we were going for ice cream. 152 00:07:38,707 --> 00:07:41,062 That's why the procedure should be done on babies. 153 00:07:41,066 --> 00:07:42,692 They won't remember. 154 00:07:43,175 --> 00:07:45,801 Now can we please just... drop this? 155 00:07:50,605 --> 00:07:51,742 So, Susan. 156 00:07:52,398 --> 00:07:54,341 You mentioned something about bringing dessert. 157 00:07:54,346 --> 00:07:55,830 What is it? 158 00:07:57,657 --> 00:07:59,281 Ice cream. 159 00:08:00,907 --> 00:08:02,223 Sorry. 160 00:08:07,245 --> 00:08:09,502 Oh, so you found the chocolate sauce? 161 00:08:09,838 --> 00:08:11,932 Oh... yeah. It's right here. 162 00:08:12,205 --> 00:08:13,641 Is everything okay? 163 00:08:13,778 --> 00:08:15,772 Oh, yeah. I was just taking a couple of aspirin. 164 00:08:15,808 --> 00:08:17,730 I hope Orson's rant didn't give you headache. 165 00:08:17,777 --> 00:08:21,011 Oh, no, I've just still got a little pain from my accident, that's all. 166 00:08:21,017 --> 00:08:22,971 Still? That was nearly two years ago. 167 00:08:23,016 --> 00:08:24,892 Well, it's just a twinge every now and then. 168 00:08:24,925 --> 00:08:26,730 Aspirin does the trick. 169 00:08:43,365 --> 00:08:45,503 No, no, no, no. I'll get that. 170 00:08:46,046 --> 00:08:48,183 I thought you kept your boat at the yacht club. 171 00:08:48,206 --> 00:08:51,361 I wanted to leave from here. This way, we avoid the congestion at the marina. 172 00:08:51,786 --> 00:08:52,943 Where's the crew? 173 00:08:53,195 --> 00:08:54,183 There's no crew. 174 00:08:54,216 --> 00:08:56,342 - I let 'em go. - What? 175 00:08:56,506 --> 00:08:59,631 Who's gonna bring us umbrella drinks and salute us when we walk by? 176 00:08:59,827 --> 00:09:01,053 Just consider me your... 177 00:09:01,056 --> 00:09:02,171 one-man navy. 178 00:09:02,915 --> 00:09:04,712 So you're gonna drive this thing by yourself? 179 00:09:04,968 --> 00:09:05,772 Well, you can help. 180 00:09:05,815 --> 00:09:07,752 Didn't that captain gave you lessons last summer? 181 00:09:07,758 --> 00:09:09,150 Oh, that's right... 182 00:09:09,157 --> 00:09:12,522 Those two boring hours I'll never get back. 183 00:09:12,525 --> 00:09:16,113 Well, the good news is this trip will be anything but boring. 184 00:09:26,867 --> 00:09:28,922 - Hey! - Hi. 185 00:09:29,188 --> 00:09:31,842 We need to talk about this Stan thing. 186 00:09:32,227 --> 00:09:34,201 Oh, is that his name? Stan? 187 00:09:34,416 --> 00:09:37,822 When he left, I just sort of said "see ya." 188 00:09:39,168 --> 00:09:40,200 Well... 189 00:09:40,247 --> 00:09:43,183 It got me thinking about how much you've had to put your life on hold 190 00:09:43,185 --> 00:09:44,573 these past few months. 191 00:09:44,607 --> 00:09:45,760 No big deal. 192 00:09:46,528 --> 00:09:48,360 No. It was a big deal. 193 00:09:48,397 --> 00:09:50,622 You have taken amazing care of me. 194 00:09:50,625 --> 00:09:54,211 But I know you have so many things you wanna get back to. 195 00:09:54,508 --> 00:09:56,103 Not really. 196 00:09:57,047 --> 00:10:01,052 Come on. It must be driving you crazy living with five screaming kids underfoot. 197 00:10:01,057 --> 00:10:04,761 I don't blame you for wanting a little peace and quiet. 198 00:10:06,686 --> 00:10:08,392 You need to leave, Mom. 199 00:10:08,678 --> 00:10:09,802 Okay. 200 00:10:09,957 --> 00:10:14,101 Okay, I know I shouldn't have brought Stan into the house. 201 00:10:14,298 --> 00:10:17,830 And next time, I promise you we will do it in the car. 202 00:10:18,166 --> 00:10:19,730 It's not just that. 203 00:10:19,775 --> 00:10:22,222 It's the smoking and the swearing, 204 00:10:22,225 --> 00:10:24,840 and the teaching the kids how to make a whiskey sour. 205 00:10:24,847 --> 00:10:26,923 It's a science, Lynette. 206 00:10:26,967 --> 00:10:28,910 It's called "mixology." 207 00:10:29,437 --> 00:10:32,653 I just think it would work better for everyone if you got your own place. 208 00:10:32,957 --> 00:10:34,170 Okay. 209 00:10:34,498 --> 00:10:36,763 - With what money? - You have money, right? 210 00:10:36,805 --> 00:10:39,682 I mean, you loaned us that $10, 000. 211 00:10:40,728 --> 00:10:42,560 Yes. I did. 212 00:10:45,208 --> 00:10:48,041 Wait a minute. That was all the money you had? 213 00:10:48,308 --> 00:10:50,972 You guys needed it, and I needed a place to stay. 214 00:10:51,178 --> 00:10:53,902 It seemed like it turned out pretty well for everybody. 215 00:10:54,745 --> 00:10:57,071 What do you mean? I thought you were living with Lucy. 216 00:10:57,327 --> 00:10:59,503 Your sister kicked me out. 217 00:11:00,497 --> 00:11:03,321 Not to put too fine a point on it, Lynette. 218 00:11:03,497 --> 00:11:06,590 But your cancer couldn't have come at a better time. 219 00:11:09,707 --> 00:11:11,750 Hey, I need your help with a school thing. 220 00:11:12,675 --> 00:11:14,870 You never ask for my help, must be something easy. 221 00:11:14,958 --> 00:11:16,701 What do you know about Dylan's Dad? 222 00:11:18,158 --> 00:11:21,391 We've got this genealogy project for school, and she want to find out about him. 223 00:11:22,506 --> 00:11:24,402 Maybe Dylan should ask her Mom. 224 00:11:24,696 --> 00:11:26,592 She gets really weird talking about him. 225 00:11:27,416 --> 00:11:29,283 Why is that, by the way? 226 00:11:30,955 --> 00:11:33,000 Okay, don't tell anybody I told you this. 227 00:11:33,276 --> 00:11:35,050 Her Mom said something at my party. 228 00:11:35,057 --> 00:11:37,743 About her Dad being abusive towards Katherine... 229 00:11:37,755 --> 00:11:39,361 and maybe Dylan, too. 230 00:11:39,825 --> 00:11:41,503 So I'm thinking that it would be better 231 00:11:41,508 --> 00:11:44,421 if you could get her to research somebody else in her family. 232 00:11:44,808 --> 00:11:46,301 Yeah. 233 00:11:47,218 --> 00:11:48,971 Maybe you're right. 234 00:11:51,766 --> 00:11:54,131 Listen, I was talking to my Mom... 235 00:11:54,137 --> 00:11:55,793 Yeah... 236 00:11:56,827 --> 00:11:58,602 I heard. 237 00:12:09,937 --> 00:12:11,072 Susan? 238 00:12:11,118 --> 00:12:13,301 Hi, it's Bree, I'm glad you're home. 239 00:12:13,346 --> 00:12:16,110 Listen, I thought I might stop by for a little visit. 240 00:12:20,386 --> 00:12:21,803 Hey. 241 00:12:21,906 --> 00:12:25,251 Look, I've only got about an hour before my next job. 242 00:12:25,288 --> 00:12:26,870 Is it okay if I grab lunch in front of the TV? 243 00:12:26,875 --> 00:12:28,190 I wanted to watch the game. 244 00:12:28,228 --> 00:12:30,283 Oh, sure. I'll bring up a tray. 245 00:12:30,315 --> 00:12:31,972 Thanks. 246 00:12:33,218 --> 00:12:35,591 Bree thinks you're doing drugs. 247 00:12:36,255 --> 00:12:39,942 She... found this on her kitchen floor. 248 00:12:39,946 --> 00:12:41,610 And it's not aspirin. 249 00:12:42,458 --> 00:12:44,311 Well, my shoulder's been hurting lately. 250 00:12:44,356 --> 00:12:47,213 She says it's a narcotic. And it's highly addictive. 251 00:12:47,676 --> 00:12:49,003 Given your history... 252 00:12:49,405 --> 00:12:52,421 Susan, these were prescribed by a doctor right after my accident. 253 00:12:52,715 --> 00:12:54,160 I found a couple in the medicine cabinet. 254 00:12:54,168 --> 00:12:56,731 I've been carrying 'em around in case my shoulder acts up. 255 00:12:57,066 --> 00:12:58,352 - Really? - Yeah. 256 00:12:58,508 --> 00:13:00,162 Really, they were the last two. 257 00:13:00,478 --> 00:13:01,830 So you got nothing to worry about. 258 00:13:02,085 --> 00:13:04,040 Oh, thank God! 259 00:13:04,778 --> 00:13:06,780 You have no idea where my mind went. 260 00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:09,952 I had you roaming back alleys to score your dope. 261 00:13:10,425 --> 00:13:12,763 Pawning our good silver to pay your dealer. 262 00:13:13,397 --> 00:13:14,852 And we don't even have good silver, 263 00:13:14,867 --> 00:13:17,232 so it got worse 'cause you had to knock over a gas station 264 00:13:17,235 --> 00:13:18,713 to buy the silver to pawn it off. 265 00:13:19,248 --> 00:13:21,033 I was really making myself crazy. 266 00:13:21,065 --> 00:13:22,490 I'm sorry about that. 267 00:13:22,515 --> 00:13:23,583 But I reiterate. 268 00:13:23,586 --> 00:13:25,602 Old pill. No problem. 269 00:13:25,666 --> 00:13:27,942 I knew it. I'm so happy. 270 00:13:28,825 --> 00:13:30,141 Good. 271 00:13:30,805 --> 00:13:32,332 Now fix me some lunch, woman. 272 00:13:32,455 --> 00:13:34,022 I wanna watch the damn game. 273 00:13:39,177 --> 00:13:40,531 Can I help you? 274 00:13:40,567 --> 00:13:41,680 Yes... 275 00:13:41,805 --> 00:13:45,720 Can you tell me who I would talk to about having my baby circumcised? 276 00:13:48,288 --> 00:13:50,040 What do you mean you can't help me? 277 00:13:50,588 --> 00:13:54,642 I received a registered letter from your husband which reads, 278 00:13:54,647 --> 00:13:58,540 "I do not wish for my son, Benjamin Hodge, to be circumcised." 279 00:13:58,677 --> 00:14:01,731 "Should the recipient of this letter encounter my wife... 280 00:14:01,878 --> 00:14:03,443 "Please feel free to show her this letter, 281 00:14:03,445 --> 00:14:05,640 "and assure her of its wide distribution 282 00:14:05,645 --> 00:14:10,351 "to hospitals and physicians across this and two neighboring states." 283 00:14:10,598 --> 00:14:11,860 Does this seem too warm to you? 284 00:14:11,905 --> 00:14:14,090 That you even felt such a thing was necessary. 285 00:14:14,097 --> 00:14:15,860 Well, obviously, it was. 286 00:14:16,005 --> 00:14:17,830 Forgive me for knowing my wife. 287 00:14:18,926 --> 00:14:21,163 What's that supposed to mean? You don't trust me? 288 00:14:21,168 --> 00:14:23,160 I trust you not to break your word. 289 00:14:23,178 --> 00:14:25,392 Since you've pointedly refused to give it. 290 00:14:25,406 --> 00:14:28,562 I trusted you to snip first and debate the merits later. 291 00:14:28,576 --> 00:14:30,450 I'm only thinking of Benjamin. 292 00:14:30,455 --> 00:14:31,813 Be reasonable. 293 00:14:31,826 --> 00:14:33,680 You're the one who's unreasonable. 294 00:14:34,057 --> 00:14:36,282 What have you got against untrimmed penises? 295 00:14:36,496 --> 00:14:38,932 They're... unsightly. 296 00:14:40,456 --> 00:14:42,570 I do not want our son to be teased... 297 00:14:43,188 --> 00:14:45,041 for being different, do you? 298 00:14:45,266 --> 00:14:49,541 So in the end, it all comes down to tradition and conformity. 299 00:14:49,548 --> 00:14:52,113 What is wrong with that? I thought we liked conformity. 300 00:14:52,115 --> 00:14:56,041 Not at the price of pain and reduced sexual pleasure. 301 00:14:57,236 --> 00:15:01,272 I can tell you someone whose sexual pleasure is going to be reduced big-time! 302 00:15:03,805 --> 00:15:05,150 Hey, sweetheart. 303 00:15:07,005 --> 00:15:08,462 What's that? 304 00:15:09,246 --> 00:15:11,101 Just something for school. 305 00:15:14,125 --> 00:15:15,560 What was that name you just typed in? 306 00:15:18,595 --> 00:15:20,472 We were assigned a genealogy project. 307 00:15:20,596 --> 00:15:22,432 I have to research on my father. 308 00:15:24,708 --> 00:15:26,051 I will call your teacher. 309 00:15:26,097 --> 00:15:27,980 She'll assign you a different project. 310 00:15:29,507 --> 00:15:30,880 What do you think you're doing? 311 00:15:31,246 --> 00:15:33,250 I am learning about my father. 312 00:15:35,807 --> 00:15:36,840 Dylan! 313 00:15:36,855 --> 00:15:40,501 For years, you have told me that my father is too evil to talk about. 314 00:15:40,697 --> 00:15:44,202 Now I find out you've discussed him at a neighborhood game night? 315 00:15:45,258 --> 00:15:46,941 Regardless... 316 00:15:46,957 --> 00:15:48,803 I am still your mother. 317 00:15:48,807 --> 00:15:50,593 And while you're under my roof... 318 00:15:50,745 --> 00:15:52,633 you will obey my rules. 319 00:15:53,006 --> 00:15:54,601 And what if I don't? 320 00:15:54,795 --> 00:15:56,502 Are you gonna slap me again? 321 00:15:56,985 --> 00:15:58,371 Kick me out of the house? 322 00:15:58,508 --> 00:16:01,001 Go ahead. Try it. See what happens. 323 00:16:02,388 --> 00:16:03,782 I'm sorry, Mom. 324 00:16:04,206 --> 00:16:06,042 You can't stop me this time. 325 00:16:08,305 --> 00:16:10,003 I am officially... 326 00:16:10,077 --> 00:16:12,333 no longer afraid of you. 327 00:16:17,115 --> 00:16:18,871 And he needed something for the pain, 328 00:16:18,918 --> 00:16:23,080 so he happened to find the last two pills in the medicine cabinet, and he took 'em. 329 00:16:23,908 --> 00:16:25,442 It's no big deal. 330 00:16:26,895 --> 00:16:28,820 Let me show you something. 331 00:16:28,905 --> 00:16:30,060 You see this breadmaker? 332 00:16:30,076 --> 00:16:32,101 This is where I hid a bottle of Chardonnay 333 00:16:32,108 --> 00:16:34,851 after I told everyone I'd stopped drinking. 334 00:16:34,907 --> 00:16:36,513 But this isn't the same thing. 335 00:16:36,515 --> 00:16:38,930 Mike wouldn't lie to me about this. 336 00:16:41,978 --> 00:16:43,711 And this rotating spice rack? 337 00:16:43,715 --> 00:16:47,342 Those little airplane bottles of vodka fit perfectly in the back. 338 00:16:49,507 --> 00:16:51,591 He said there were no more pills. 339 00:16:51,898 --> 00:16:53,372 I was looking him in the eye. 340 00:16:53,378 --> 00:16:57,431 Susan, addicts are experts at deception. 341 00:16:57,628 --> 00:16:59,470 My advice to you... 342 00:16:59,497 --> 00:17:01,550 Trust. 343 00:17:03,208 --> 00:17:05,152 But verify. 344 00:17:50,806 --> 00:17:53,921 So... this is nice. 345 00:17:53,926 --> 00:17:56,353 Little family get together. 346 00:17:57,995 --> 00:17:59,503 Why didn't you call Lucy? 347 00:18:00,618 --> 00:18:02,111 You know her, always busy. 348 00:18:03,728 --> 00:18:05,461 So, Mom... 349 00:18:05,986 --> 00:18:07,162 You look good. 350 00:18:07,557 --> 00:18:09,700 Thanks. You seeing anybody? 351 00:18:11,306 --> 00:18:13,143 Not that I wanna tell you about. 352 00:18:13,886 --> 00:18:15,102 Still alone. 353 00:18:15,897 --> 00:18:18,381 Look, the special is chicken. 354 00:18:18,417 --> 00:18:19,312 Doesn't that sound good? 355 00:18:19,318 --> 00:18:20,520 Oder me one. 356 00:18:20,526 --> 00:18:24,032 I'm going to the bar and check the score on the game. 357 00:18:24,276 --> 00:18:25,243 Have fun. 358 00:18:26,126 --> 00:18:27,143 I know what this is. 359 00:18:27,246 --> 00:18:28,291 And I'm not doing it. 360 00:18:28,297 --> 00:18:30,471 What? What? We're having lunch. 361 00:18:30,507 --> 00:18:31,510 She's not moving back in. 362 00:18:31,607 --> 00:18:33,841 I resist your attempts to manipulate me. 363 00:18:33,876 --> 00:18:35,742 Nobody is manipulating you. 364 00:18:35,786 --> 00:18:39,423 My banderies are stong, I know what I want, and I deserve to be happy. 365 00:18:40,125 --> 00:18:41,163 What have you got there? 366 00:18:41,167 --> 00:18:42,740 Are you reading from something? 367 00:18:42,677 --> 00:18:44,492 Okay! 368 00:18:44,506 --> 00:18:47,501 As soon as you invited me to lunch, I called my therapist. 369 00:18:47,505 --> 00:18:51,301 And he told me you'd try to guilt me into taking Mom back, but... 370 00:18:52,577 --> 00:18:54,252 I will not be emotionally blackmailed. 371 00:18:54,256 --> 00:18:56,150 Give me that! 372 00:18:56,538 --> 00:18:58,382 I already had her, Lynette. 373 00:18:58,425 --> 00:19:00,351 She stayed with me for two years. 374 00:19:00,437 --> 00:19:03,133 Two years in which my weight ballooned. 375 00:19:03,137 --> 00:19:04,702 She put me through four different hairstyles. 376 00:19:04,708 --> 00:19:09,153 Once, she even brought home this guy she met at a bar. 377 00:19:10,836 --> 00:19:12,391 She's so not like that now. 378 00:19:12,405 --> 00:19:14,240 I don't care! 379 00:19:14,287 --> 00:19:16,280 The day she moved out, I got my life back. 380 00:19:16,295 --> 00:19:19,252 So if you wanna have lunch, fine. 381 00:19:19,867 --> 00:19:22,080 - But that's it. - Okay. 382 00:19:35,726 --> 00:19:36,923 Good for you. 383 00:19:39,175 --> 00:19:40,472 I'm sorry. 384 00:19:47,655 --> 00:19:48,652 Where's the chicken? 385 00:19:48,656 --> 00:19:51,610 Oh, yeah. Where is that waiter? 386 00:19:51,616 --> 00:19:53,072 I'm gonna go find him. 387 00:19:55,697 --> 00:19:57,232 Just hear me out. 388 00:19:59,535 --> 00:20:01,703 If you trim the sides in a little, 389 00:20:01,707 --> 00:20:05,472 I think you'll lose that wingy effect you have going now. 390 00:20:05,495 --> 00:20:06,493 Mom! 391 00:20:06,597 --> 00:20:09,261 Well, I'm just saying that with the shape of your face, 392 00:20:09,346 --> 00:20:10,982 you're not doing yourself any favors. 393 00:20:10,985 --> 00:20:14,201 Do you think you could go for one minute without being critical? 394 00:20:14,235 --> 00:20:15,530 What are you talking about? 395 00:20:15,545 --> 00:20:19,763 I have not said one word about your eye shadow yet. 396 00:20:22,386 --> 00:20:23,853 I reject your negativity. 397 00:20:23,855 --> 00:20:26,522 I am as beautiful as I feel inside. 398 00:20:30,546 --> 00:20:32,233 Oh, it's you. 399 00:20:32,238 --> 00:20:34,441 Thank you for calling about my painting. 400 00:20:34,476 --> 00:20:35,943 I can't believe I forgot that. 401 00:20:35,987 --> 00:20:38,231 Yeah, I know it meant a lot to you. 402 00:20:43,015 --> 00:20:44,051 There's a hole in it. 403 00:20:44,075 --> 00:20:46,781 Yeah, I don't get modern art either. 404 00:20:47,108 --> 00:20:48,411 Okay, Edie... 405 00:20:49,015 --> 00:20:50,801 I know that you're angry right now, but... 406 00:20:50,806 --> 00:20:52,761 You think I'm angry? 407 00:20:53,795 --> 00:20:55,923 You should've seen Victor. 408 00:20:56,408 --> 00:20:57,352 What? 409 00:20:57,358 --> 00:20:59,441 Yeah, we had a little chat. 410 00:20:59,907 --> 00:21:02,710 Actually, he didn't believe that you were screwing his wife... 411 00:21:02,718 --> 00:21:04,440 until I showed him some photos. 412 00:21:05,337 --> 00:21:07,750 And then he was just enraged. 413 00:21:08,256 --> 00:21:10,041 It was a little scary. 414 00:21:19,717 --> 00:21:22,371 For God sakes, Carlos, am I gonna have to change this number? 415 00:21:22,407 --> 00:21:23,833 Victor knows. 416 00:21:23,865 --> 00:21:25,812 - Knows what? - Everything. 417 00:21:25,855 --> 00:21:27,563 Edie told him we're having an affair. 418 00:21:27,597 --> 00:21:30,551 No, that's impossible. He hasn't said a word. 419 00:21:30,685 --> 00:21:34,551 In fact, I've never seen him so sweet and attentive. 420 00:21:34,688 --> 00:21:36,431 It's an act! 421 00:21:36,585 --> 00:21:38,360 Edie said he was enraged. 422 00:21:38,407 --> 00:21:40,062 Well, if he's so mad at me, 423 00:21:40,067 --> 00:21:42,402 why would he take me on a boat trip? 424 00:21:43,506 --> 00:21:45,213 He took you on a boat? 425 00:21:46,808 --> 00:21:47,851 Oh, crap. 426 00:21:47,907 --> 00:21:49,463 I think you need to get out of there. 427 00:21:49,507 --> 00:21:50,791 Gaby? 428 00:21:54,708 --> 00:21:57,001 I was just talking to Bree. 429 00:21:59,406 --> 00:22:00,432 We agreed. 430 00:22:00,437 --> 00:22:01,682 Total privacy. 431 00:22:04,307 --> 00:22:06,302 When we head home, you can have it back. 432 00:22:06,406 --> 00:22:07,892 And you can talk to... 433 00:22:08,148 --> 00:22:10,220 Bree, as much as you like. 434 00:22:24,007 --> 00:22:25,243 Can I get you something? 435 00:22:27,306 --> 00:22:28,700 No, I'm good. 436 00:22:31,805 --> 00:22:33,212 You okay? 437 00:22:33,907 --> 00:22:36,183 Actually, I'm really cold. 438 00:22:36,206 --> 00:22:38,643 Maybe we should bail and do this another day. 439 00:22:38,808 --> 00:22:40,223 You know, when it's warmer. 440 00:22:41,107 --> 00:22:42,300 It'll warm up. 441 00:22:43,165 --> 00:22:44,642 Okay, well... 442 00:22:44,867 --> 00:22:48,151 Just in case, we should run back to shore so I can grab a jacket. 443 00:22:48,407 --> 00:22:50,000 Gaby... 444 00:22:50,757 --> 00:22:52,362 You're not going anywhere. 445 00:22:52,707 --> 00:22:53,790 I'm not? 446 00:22:53,805 --> 00:22:54,971 I know about everything. 447 00:22:54,977 --> 00:22:57,373 You, Carlos, the affair, everything. 448 00:22:59,416 --> 00:23:01,260 Okay. I am... 449 00:23:01,266 --> 00:23:02,752 so sorry. 450 00:23:02,987 --> 00:23:06,130 But in my defense, you were always gone. 451 00:23:06,295 --> 00:23:10,301 And you knew how needy I was when you married me. 452 00:23:10,607 --> 00:23:12,152 That's it? 453 00:23:12,306 --> 00:23:13,582 That's all you have to say to me? 454 00:23:13,585 --> 00:23:17,601 Well, it'd be easier to talk if we were back on shore. 455 00:23:25,675 --> 00:23:26,740 What are you doing? 456 00:23:26,707 --> 00:23:28,420 It's bad enough you've betrayed me. 457 00:23:30,427 --> 00:23:32,623 Now I have to listen to your whining? 458 00:23:34,938 --> 00:23:36,613 I brought something for you. 459 00:23:45,705 --> 00:23:47,372 Gaby! 460 00:24:03,116 --> 00:24:04,410 What's that? 461 00:24:05,007 --> 00:24:06,901 Everything I know about your father. 462 00:24:07,507 --> 00:24:09,892 Date of birth, his mother's name. 463 00:24:10,155 --> 00:24:11,781 Last known address. 464 00:24:12,505 --> 00:24:14,701 It's everything you need to find him. 465 00:24:18,558 --> 00:24:19,873 Thank you. 466 00:24:23,307 --> 00:24:25,041 Before you take this... 467 00:24:26,698 --> 00:24:28,981 You have to promise me something. 468 00:24:33,208 --> 00:24:34,200 Okay. 469 00:24:35,007 --> 00:24:36,903 You cannot bring him here... 470 00:24:38,726 --> 00:24:40,433 or even tell him where I am. 471 00:24:41,335 --> 00:24:42,541 Why? 472 00:24:43,357 --> 00:24:45,412 The last time that I saw your father, 473 00:24:45,645 --> 00:24:47,682 it was to tell him that I was leaving him. 474 00:24:48,008 --> 00:24:50,302 And I was taking you with me. 475 00:24:54,787 --> 00:24:57,100 He always liked to slap me around a little bit. 476 00:24:58,405 --> 00:25:00,932 But that night was... 477 00:25:04,905 --> 00:25:06,301 unimaginable. 478 00:25:06,406 --> 00:25:08,321 I don't remember everything. 479 00:25:08,328 --> 00:25:10,583 I was in pretty bad shape by the end of it. 480 00:25:11,547 --> 00:25:13,242 But once... 481 00:25:13,605 --> 00:25:16,512 he was done slamming my face into the wall, 482 00:25:17,818 --> 00:25:20,203 he started choking me. 483 00:25:20,417 --> 00:25:22,891 And he kept screaming that 484 00:25:22,898 --> 00:25:24,831 he was gonna kill me. 485 00:25:25,906 --> 00:25:28,413 And the last thought that I had... 486 00:25:33,327 --> 00:25:37,021 was what would happen to you if I died. 487 00:25:41,198 --> 00:25:43,413 So you can't tell him where I am. 488 00:25:45,608 --> 00:25:46,892 You just can't. 489 00:25:55,705 --> 00:25:58,272 Maybe you can talk to my teacher tomorrow, 490 00:25:58,995 --> 00:26:01,600 and have her give me another assignment. 491 00:26:03,905 --> 00:26:05,062 Thank you. 492 00:26:29,706 --> 00:26:31,800 I told you, if you're gonna have a tree house, 493 00:26:31,808 --> 00:26:33,863 you've gotta keep it clean. 494 00:26:39,658 --> 00:26:40,672 Here. 495 00:26:40,805 --> 00:26:42,573 Take these and dump them by the front door. 496 00:26:42,768 --> 00:26:45,643 Hey, what the hell are you doing? 497 00:26:48,318 --> 00:26:49,990 Mom, hurry, get out of the car! 498 00:26:54,565 --> 00:26:55,752 No, no, no. 499 00:26:55,757 --> 00:26:57,600 You are not leaving those here. 500 00:26:57,958 --> 00:26:59,103 Hi, Mom. 501 00:26:59,137 --> 00:27:00,760 - Take her away. - Unh-unh, Lynette. 502 00:27:00,805 --> 00:27:03,400 You may have been able to strong-arm the weak one, but not me. 503 00:27:03,418 --> 00:27:04,411 I'm not weak! 504 00:27:04,416 --> 00:27:05,883 - Then why did you call me? - Get out of our way. 505 00:27:05,888 --> 00:27:09,502 Lucy, every fight we have ever had has ended with my foot on your neck. 506 00:27:09,535 --> 00:27:12,003 I guarantee that this one's gonna end the same way, too. 507 00:27:14,305 --> 00:27:15,862 Maybe we should talk inside. 508 00:27:39,507 --> 00:27:42,241 I'm often asked why the Torah tells us 509 00:27:42,408 --> 00:27:46,380 that a child must be circumcised on the eighth day of his life. 510 00:27:46,656 --> 00:27:49,862 Some say that's how long it takes to get a decent caterer. 511 00:27:58,306 --> 00:28:00,493 What a lovely ceremony. 512 00:28:00,907 --> 00:28:02,591 I'm Deborah's friend Bree. 513 00:28:03,006 --> 00:28:06,391 I have what may strike you as a very odd request. 514 00:28:06,496 --> 00:28:08,512 Trust me, it won't be one I haven't heard. 515 00:28:09,707 --> 00:28:11,823 Do you think, while you're here, you could... 516 00:28:11,976 --> 00:28:14,242 do a bris for my baby, too? 517 00:28:14,767 --> 00:28:16,552 Okay... New one. 518 00:28:16,705 --> 00:28:18,051 Good for you. 519 00:28:18,088 --> 00:28:19,622 I know it might seem tacky, 520 00:28:19,637 --> 00:28:22,220 piggybacking on Deborah's bris, but... 521 00:28:22,905 --> 00:28:25,220 we could do it in the den very quietly. 522 00:28:26,428 --> 00:28:30,200 Well, as we just saw, there's so such thing as a quiet bris. 523 00:28:30,798 --> 00:28:34,170 - You said your name was Bree? - Yes, Bree Hodge... 524 00:28:35,638 --> 00:28:37,250 Born Rabinowitz. 525 00:28:38,107 --> 00:28:40,052 I wouldn't have taken you for Jewish. 526 00:28:40,055 --> 00:28:43,001 I should only have a nickel for every time I've heard that. 527 00:28:43,825 --> 00:28:47,022 Don't you want a proper bris with your friends and family there? 528 00:28:47,028 --> 00:28:49,632 I would love that, but my husband Orson... 529 00:28:49,648 --> 00:28:51,960 Big, stubborn, goy. 530 00:28:52,177 --> 00:28:54,003 He says we should do nothing, 531 00:28:54,107 --> 00:28:56,383 and let the child decide when he's grown. 532 00:28:57,207 --> 00:29:00,561 We don't pick our parents. We should pick our religion? 533 00:29:00,806 --> 00:29:03,712 I wouldn't feel right doing this without speaking to your husband. 534 00:29:03,717 --> 00:29:06,713 Well, he's out of town, and... 535 00:29:07,278 --> 00:29:10,452 our Benjamin is 8 days old today. 536 00:29:10,707 --> 00:29:13,083 And if I don't do this, my... 537 00:29:13,087 --> 00:29:16,742 Grandma... Tzeitel... 538 00:29:17,005 --> 00:29:20,210 will never forgive me, may she rest in peace. 539 00:29:20,446 --> 00:29:23,100 You realize that this is a covenant? 540 00:29:23,607 --> 00:29:25,300 That whatever your husband says, 541 00:29:25,405 --> 00:29:29,771 you are promising to raise your child as a devout Jew? 542 00:29:31,955 --> 00:29:33,971 I swear to you before God 543 00:29:33,975 --> 00:29:37,943 that this child will be as devout a Jew as I am. 544 00:29:45,206 --> 00:29:47,043 Hey, where have you been? 545 00:29:47,047 --> 00:29:48,753 I woke up, and you were gone. 546 00:29:48,806 --> 00:29:50,363 Oh, we had a very busy day. 547 00:29:50,405 --> 00:29:52,510 We dropped off the dry cleaning, we... 548 00:29:52,655 --> 00:29:54,402 deposited money into our Christmas account. 549 00:29:54,435 --> 00:29:56,970 And then we got circumcised. 550 00:29:59,505 --> 00:30:01,040 You did what? 551 00:30:02,206 --> 00:30:03,891 It's just a little unsightly foreskin. 552 00:30:03,907 --> 00:30:05,102 He'll never miss it. 553 00:30:05,208 --> 00:30:07,263 So why stop there? Why not cut off his testicles? 554 00:30:07,305 --> 00:30:09,823 You obviously have no problem going after mine. 555 00:30:10,108 --> 00:30:12,282 - Orson... - Well, what do you call it, Bree? 556 00:30:12,708 --> 00:30:15,302 Going behind my back, ignoring my feelings on this? 557 00:30:15,336 --> 00:30:17,710 I gave them very serious consideration, but... 558 00:30:17,718 --> 00:30:19,212 it's my blood running in his veins, 559 00:30:19,218 --> 00:30:21,860 which ultimately makes it my decision. 560 00:30:22,905 --> 00:30:24,500 Your blood? 561 00:30:26,808 --> 00:30:28,270 So who am I to Benjamin? 562 00:30:29,608 --> 00:30:31,650 A friendly uncle? A male nanny? 563 00:30:31,805 --> 00:30:33,053 Of course not. 564 00:30:33,087 --> 00:30:36,572 Then why do you treat me like I'm anything less than his father? 565 00:30:36,806 --> 00:30:40,200 I mean, haven't I earned that during the course of our little hoax? 566 00:30:40,236 --> 00:30:43,260 I lied for you, I risked public humiliation. 567 00:30:43,268 --> 00:30:46,473 I do everything but strap on the pregnancy harness myself. 568 00:30:46,898 --> 00:30:48,383 I know that. 569 00:30:49,606 --> 00:30:52,702 I see myself as Benjamin's father. 570 00:30:54,315 --> 00:30:56,633 I need to know if you see me that way, too. 571 00:31:01,907 --> 00:31:04,092 I know how much you love Benjamin. 572 00:31:07,466 --> 00:31:08,822 I guess... 573 00:31:10,008 --> 00:31:11,200 I guess I just have to remember 574 00:31:11,207 --> 00:31:14,562 that it's love that makes us a family and not blood. 575 00:31:30,456 --> 00:31:32,581 Your son... 576 00:31:32,588 --> 00:31:34,770 would like you to hold him. 577 00:31:43,908 --> 00:31:46,540 By the way, his hebrew name is Simha. 578 00:31:48,006 --> 00:31:49,561 I'll explain later. 579 00:31:57,796 --> 00:32:00,020 Oh, Carlos, thank God you're here. 580 00:32:00,926 --> 00:32:02,353 Where is he? Where's Victor? 581 00:32:02,806 --> 00:32:05,141 Well, I clubbed him and knocked him overboard. 582 00:32:06,405 --> 00:32:07,591 He's in the ocean? 583 00:32:07,605 --> 00:32:09,962 He was going to kill me! He had a gun. 584 00:32:10,006 --> 00:32:11,931 Okay, okay, let me think. 585 00:32:13,477 --> 00:32:16,061 You saw him in the water. I mean, he's not dead, right? 586 00:32:16,188 --> 00:32:18,143 No, he's mad, but he wasn't dead. 587 00:32:18,308 --> 00:32:20,321 So then we'll send someone out there to fish him out. 588 00:32:20,508 --> 00:32:22,863 We'll call the police, show 'em the gun. 589 00:32:22,907 --> 00:32:25,660 And tell 'em that it was self-defense. You still have the gun? 590 00:32:32,258 --> 00:32:33,642 It's in there. 591 00:32:39,268 --> 00:32:42,113 Well, maybe he wanted it to muffle the gun. 592 00:32:43,406 --> 00:32:45,781 There is no gun. 593 00:32:47,806 --> 00:32:49,443 Ice pick? 594 00:32:50,405 --> 00:32:52,460 - What are you doing? - I'm calling the coast guard. 595 00:32:52,508 --> 00:32:54,792 And tell them what? I knocked my husband overboard 596 00:32:54,795 --> 00:32:57,181 because he was coming after me with a sweater? 597 00:32:58,108 --> 00:32:59,980 No, come on, we gotta go back out there. 598 00:33:01,705 --> 00:33:03,401 Guys, I can't be any clearer on this. 599 00:33:03,435 --> 00:33:05,262 I am not taking her back. 600 00:33:05,306 --> 00:33:07,050 It's your turn, simple as that. 601 00:33:07,106 --> 00:33:08,362 I've had her for four months. 602 00:33:08,405 --> 00:33:10,163 I also had cancer for four months. 603 00:33:10,205 --> 00:33:12,953 And if I could've asked one of them to leave, 604 00:33:12,956 --> 00:33:14,432 I'm not sure which I would've picked. 605 00:33:14,436 --> 00:33:16,572 Oh, four months, boohoo. 606 00:33:16,576 --> 00:33:17,792 I had her for a year. 607 00:33:17,808 --> 00:33:20,492 And that was the year she joined the gin of the month club. 608 00:33:20,506 --> 00:33:22,061 I don't have any room for her. 609 00:33:22,105 --> 00:33:24,721 I already have seven people in four bedrooms. 610 00:33:24,735 --> 00:33:26,701 There it is, the "I have a family" card! 611 00:33:26,707 --> 00:33:28,742 Congratulations. You can reproduce. 612 00:33:28,765 --> 00:33:30,381 We're all thrilled for you. 613 00:33:31,135 --> 00:33:32,761 Why can't you take her? 614 00:33:32,806 --> 00:33:35,532 You are in that huge house all by yourself 615 00:33:35,538 --> 00:33:36,803 that you got from the divorce. 616 00:33:36,906 --> 00:33:38,182 Dave and I are just separated! 617 00:33:38,196 --> 00:33:40,202 There's a good chance that he's moving back in, 618 00:33:40,218 --> 00:33:42,210 but not if Mom is living there. 619 00:33:42,505 --> 00:33:44,960 Well, we can't just throw her out on the street. 620 00:33:45,027 --> 00:33:46,462 I can. 621 00:33:47,507 --> 00:33:51,373 My therapist said it's time for me to be a little more "Lydia-centric." 622 00:33:53,157 --> 00:33:55,663 I really wanna meet this jackass. 623 00:33:56,006 --> 00:33:59,823 Okay, we all have our excuses, but... 624 00:33:59,977 --> 00:34:01,263 we gotta figure something out. 625 00:34:01,265 --> 00:34:03,260 Come on, she is our mother. 626 00:34:03,708 --> 00:34:05,123 Is she? 627 00:34:05,907 --> 00:34:08,290 She never acted like one, not that I can remember. 628 00:34:08,305 --> 00:34:11,903 I remember she showed up drunk to my graduation, wearing a housecoat. 629 00:34:11,906 --> 00:34:14,531 Okay, but... The point is, she went. 630 00:34:14,536 --> 00:34:16,052 Remember that one Christmas? 631 00:34:16,207 --> 00:34:17,782 And we came down, 632 00:34:17,785 --> 00:34:19,913 and there was Mom under the tree, 633 00:34:20,007 --> 00:34:22,600 passed out drunk in the middle of all of our unwrapped toys. 634 00:34:22,637 --> 00:34:24,732 My Raggedy Ann smelled like peppermint schnapps. 635 00:34:24,735 --> 00:34:25,892 Okay. 636 00:34:26,035 --> 00:34:27,933 She wasn't perfect, clearly. 637 00:34:27,937 --> 00:34:29,893 But she gave birth to us. 638 00:34:29,908 --> 00:34:33,131 We owe her our lives, and now that she needs us, 639 00:34:33,135 --> 00:34:35,160 we can't just turn our back on her. 640 00:34:35,508 --> 00:34:38,292 I know I'm supposed to feel guilty, but I don't. 641 00:34:38,468 --> 00:34:40,353 I don't either. 642 00:34:41,907 --> 00:34:45,383 It's like you're saying you don't care about her. 643 00:34:48,416 --> 00:34:49,971 At all...? 644 00:34:53,307 --> 00:34:55,122 And I don't understand that. 645 00:34:55,308 --> 00:35:00,022 Well, if you care so much, then the answer to the problem is... 646 00:35:00,106 --> 00:35:02,512 sorta obvious, isn't it? 647 00:35:04,947 --> 00:35:06,313 We can help with money. 648 00:35:07,507 --> 00:35:09,460 I can send you $100 a month. 649 00:35:16,008 --> 00:35:17,020 I don't need your money. 650 00:35:17,025 --> 00:35:19,413 I can take care of my mother all by myself. 651 00:35:21,557 --> 00:35:22,561 Lynette... 652 00:35:22,607 --> 00:35:24,041 Here's how you can help... 653 00:35:24,106 --> 00:35:26,831 Don't visit for the next few years. 654 00:35:27,106 --> 00:35:28,742 'Cause it seems fairly likely 655 00:35:28,747 --> 00:35:31,603 I won't have stopped hating you by then. 656 00:35:34,805 --> 00:35:37,393 I guess that's her way of asking us to leave. 657 00:35:38,708 --> 00:35:40,513 Mom, where's Grandma going? 658 00:35:41,107 --> 00:35:42,341 Going? 659 00:35:58,506 --> 00:36:00,080 Wait. 660 00:36:00,647 --> 00:36:01,843 What's that? 661 00:36:02,065 --> 00:36:03,212 Gaby! 662 00:36:07,505 --> 00:36:09,200 Here. Sit him here. 663 00:36:09,406 --> 00:36:10,851 Oh, God. 664 00:36:15,405 --> 00:36:16,812 You tried to kill me. 665 00:36:17,706 --> 00:36:19,493 Well, I came back for you, didn't I? 666 00:36:20,008 --> 00:36:21,160 What were you thinking? 667 00:36:21,168 --> 00:36:22,693 Well, I thought you were trying to kill me. 668 00:36:22,707 --> 00:36:25,251 I was just trying to talk to you. 669 00:36:25,597 --> 00:36:27,553 See if we still had a chance. 670 00:36:28,606 --> 00:36:30,761 I see that you're still screwing this guy. 671 00:36:31,307 --> 00:36:33,102 And what the hell is he doing on my boat? 672 00:36:33,137 --> 00:36:35,300 You mean, besides saving your life? 673 00:36:35,607 --> 00:36:37,260 That was a big mistake, buddy. 674 00:36:38,806 --> 00:36:40,031 Oh, right. 675 00:36:40,507 --> 00:36:43,612 Yeah, you're the guy that said if anyone messed with your woman 676 00:36:43,906 --> 00:36:46,492 that you'd use your money to make him disappear. 677 00:36:47,156 --> 00:36:49,002 But right now it's just you and me. 678 00:36:49,507 --> 00:36:52,132 So how tough are you without your A. T. M. card? 679 00:36:56,705 --> 00:36:58,231 That's what I figured. 680 00:37:00,355 --> 00:37:01,372 Victor! 681 00:37:01,906 --> 00:37:03,162 Oh, my God! 682 00:37:04,907 --> 00:37:06,001 Victor! 683 00:37:06,708 --> 00:37:07,701 Oh, my God! 684 00:37:07,708 --> 00:37:08,803 Come on. Get up! 685 00:37:09,008 --> 00:37:11,663 Get up. I wanna see the look on your face when the knife goes in. 686 00:37:19,868 --> 00:37:21,652 I'm getting pretty good at that. 687 00:37:22,607 --> 00:37:24,642 Okay, let's pull him back in again. 688 00:37:24,656 --> 00:37:25,691 What, are you crazy? 689 00:37:25,706 --> 00:37:27,832 We'll just tie him up so he doesn't cause any trouble. 690 00:37:27,836 --> 00:37:29,203 Victor! 691 00:37:31,808 --> 00:37:33,203 Where'd he go? 692 00:37:51,345 --> 00:37:52,991 Maybe we should go back there and look somewhere else? 693 00:37:53,005 --> 00:37:55,720 We looked for six hours, he's gone. 694 00:37:59,028 --> 00:38:00,500 Oh, my God. We killed him. 695 00:38:00,795 --> 00:38:02,530 It was self-defense, right? 696 00:38:02,706 --> 00:38:03,732 I mean, he was trying to kill us. 697 00:38:03,736 --> 00:38:05,593 We can't prove that. 698 00:38:07,707 --> 00:38:10,030 This is bad, Gaby. 699 00:38:11,006 --> 00:38:13,202 When people find out we were on that boat with him... 700 00:38:16,205 --> 00:38:17,873 Maybe they won't. 701 00:38:18,306 --> 00:38:19,301 What do you mean? 702 00:38:19,706 --> 00:38:22,181 No one but you knows I was with Victor. 703 00:38:22,807 --> 00:38:24,870 I'll say he went out alone. 704 00:38:25,785 --> 00:38:28,203 I told him I was leaving him, and he was depressed. 705 00:38:28,205 --> 00:38:29,600 Suicidal, even. 706 00:38:29,607 --> 00:38:31,662 Only one problem... 707 00:38:32,007 --> 00:38:34,043 The boat's right here. 708 00:38:34,908 --> 00:38:37,081 Then maybe the boat needs to go back out... 709 00:38:38,206 --> 00:38:39,640 alone. 710 00:38:59,997 --> 00:39:02,703 Whatever you're thinking, I can explain. 711 00:39:02,706 --> 00:39:05,260 I'm thinking that you're a drug addict and a liar. 712 00:39:05,345 --> 00:39:07,332 So say something that's not that. 713 00:39:07,345 --> 00:39:10,492 - Susan, listen... - Is it so horrible living with me? 714 00:39:10,508 --> 00:39:12,421 I mean, do I make you so miserable 715 00:39:12,426 --> 00:39:15,690 that you can't even face me without numbing the pain? 716 00:39:15,905 --> 00:39:17,383 Of course not. 717 00:39:18,507 --> 00:39:19,671 I love you. 718 00:39:19,908 --> 00:39:22,100 Well, if you did, you wouldn't be doing this! 719 00:39:22,406 --> 00:39:25,633 I mean, my God, Mike, we have a baby on the way! 720 00:39:27,927 --> 00:39:29,153 Can I say something now? 721 00:39:29,156 --> 00:39:30,612 Sure, go ahead. 722 00:39:30,795 --> 00:39:32,601 Oh, should I look you in the eyes? 723 00:39:32,908 --> 00:39:35,170 Does it make it easier for you to lie? 724 00:39:36,207 --> 00:39:38,822 I didn't tell you about the pills... 725 00:39:38,827 --> 00:39:40,782 'cause I didn't want you to feel guilty. 726 00:39:41,606 --> 00:39:42,901 Me, feel guilty? 727 00:39:42,906 --> 00:39:44,100 Yeah. 728 00:39:44,306 --> 00:39:46,452 When I put in that water heater for McCluskey, 729 00:39:46,705 --> 00:39:47,931 I really wrenched my shoulder. 730 00:39:47,938 --> 00:39:49,770 And the doctor told me I should take a break. 731 00:39:49,786 --> 00:39:50,890 But I didn't... 732 00:39:51,068 --> 00:39:52,372 Because that was the day 733 00:39:52,377 --> 00:39:53,763 we found out you were pregnant. 734 00:39:53,906 --> 00:39:55,942 And from then on, all I have heard about 735 00:39:55,947 --> 00:40:00,130 are car seats and strollers and $10, 000 preschools! 736 00:40:00,358 --> 00:40:03,402 You know, it didn't seem like a really good time for me to quit working. 737 00:40:04,555 --> 00:40:07,622 Mike, we don't need any of that stuff. 738 00:40:08,855 --> 00:40:11,452 Yeah. You say that... 739 00:40:11,458 --> 00:40:12,352 now. 740 00:40:12,725 --> 00:40:15,600 But when Benjamin Hodge is in Harvard, 741 00:40:15,605 --> 00:40:18,993 and our kid's just a plumber like his Dad... 742 00:40:23,908 --> 00:40:27,723 I just want to be able to give him the advantages I never got. 743 00:40:30,015 --> 00:40:34,902 God, the only advantage he needs is to have a healthy Dad who's not doing this. 744 00:40:38,206 --> 00:40:39,640 You're right. 745 00:40:42,205 --> 00:40:43,920 I get it. 746 00:40:43,907 --> 00:40:45,463 Okay? 747 00:40:46,207 --> 00:40:47,671 I'm done. 748 00:40:50,408 --> 00:40:51,862 I wanna believe you. 749 00:40:52,307 --> 00:40:53,591 It's just... 750 00:40:54,156 --> 00:40:56,063 That addicts are good at lying. 751 00:40:57,506 --> 00:40:58,633 Yeah. 752 00:41:00,207 --> 00:41:01,323 All right... 753 00:41:01,738 --> 00:41:03,363 How about this? 754 00:41:18,107 --> 00:41:19,441 You believe me now? 755 00:41:21,808 --> 00:41:22,903 Thank you. 756 00:41:26,488 --> 00:41:27,903 Deception... 757 00:41:27,925 --> 00:41:31,253 You find it in all the best homes... 758 00:41:33,538 --> 00:41:38,252 Parents rely on it when dealing with inquisitive children... 759 00:41:41,638 --> 00:41:47,092 Women use it to help keep secrets, big and small... 760 00:41:49,938 --> 00:41:55,821 Lovers need it to cover up inconvenient accidents... 761 00:41:58,245 --> 00:42:01,340 Why do people resort to deception...? 762 00:42:04,485 --> 00:42:07,601 Because it's a handy tool... 763 00:42:08,106 --> 00:42:10,310 that helps get us... 764 00:42:11,065 --> 00:42:14,880 exactly what we're looking for.