1
00:00:04,513 --> 00:00:14,321
[thunder crashing]
[drilling, sawing]
2
00:00:14,323 --> 00:00:17,499
[electricity crackling]
3
00:00:17,517 --> 00:00:20,710
It's alive!
4
00:00:38,324 --> 00:00:41,308
Mother, Father...
This is my boyfriend, Mario.
5
00:00:41,469 --> 00:00:42,785
[chimes play]
6
00:00:42,786 --> 00:00:45,984
Charmed to finally meet your
acquaintance, Mari-- oh!
7
00:00:46,019 --> 00:00:48,240
Did a pig shit out a dead
fetus in here?
8
00:00:48,325 --> 00:00:49,624
[sniffs] Oh-ho-ho!
9
00:00:49,626 --> 00:00:51,026
I beg-a you forgiveness.
10
00:00:51,028 --> 00:00:53,318
I come-a here
through the sewer line.
11
00:00:53,353 --> 00:00:54,429
[chimes play]
12
00:00:54,431 --> 00:00:54,996
Eh?
13
00:00:54,998 --> 00:00:56,098
Mario's a plumber.
14
00:00:56,100 --> 00:00:58,070
So he commutes
through human waste?
15
00:00:58,135 --> 00:00:59,301
And he's Italian.
16
00:00:59,303 --> 00:01:00,735
Oh, okay. Say no more.
17
00:01:00,737 --> 00:01:02,471
[chimes play]
18
00:01:02,473 --> 00:01:04,247
Did you lose something,
Mario?
19
00:01:04,282 --> 00:01:06,074
Hey, hey!
I-a found-a one!
20
00:01:06,076 --> 00:01:07,442
[chuckles] Yes.
21
00:01:07,444 --> 00:01:09,144
In our sofa.
22
00:01:09,146 --> 00:01:09,945
[ding!]
23
00:01:09,947 --> 00:01:11,446
And there it goes.
24
00:01:11,448 --> 00:01:12,981
So I says, "Aye, paisan,
25
00:01:12,983 --> 00:01:16,906
toilet paper and-a paper towels--
They ain't the same thing!"
26
00:01:16,941 --> 00:01:17,252
[laughs]
27
00:01:17,254 --> 00:01:20,255
[sarcastically] Mm, another
clogged toilet story.
28
00:01:20,257 --> 00:01:23,024
What a delightful compliment to
our mushroom soup.
29
00:01:23,026 --> 00:01:24,916
Mushrooms?! Ay-yi-yi!
30
00:01:25,027 --> 00:01:26,962
[sneezes]
31
00:01:26,964 --> 00:01:29,402
Remind me to bring mushrooms
on our honeymoon.
32
00:01:29,403 --> 00:01:33,702
I'm so sorry.
I have a few allergies.
33
00:01:33,704 --> 00:01:35,604
Mama mia! Flowers!
34
00:01:35,606 --> 00:01:39,774
[sneezes]
35
00:01:39,776 --> 00:01:41,343
Oh! My drapes!
36
00:01:41,345 --> 00:01:42,744
My meat drapes!
37
00:01:42,746 --> 00:01:44,579
Both equally dusty.
38
00:01:44,581 --> 00:01:45,714
Ay-yi-yi!
39
00:01:45,716 --> 00:01:46,548
[sneezes]
40
00:01:46,550 --> 00:01:47,916
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
41
00:01:47,918 --> 00:01:51,720
["Game Over" music plays]
42
00:01:51,722 --> 00:01:53,955
I, Professor
Cornelius Q. Quibblefingers,
43
00:01:53,957 --> 00:01:56,508
will be the first human
being to travel back in time
44
00:01:56,509 --> 00:01:59,060
and see
the magnificent dinosaurs!
45
00:01:59,062 --> 00:02:01,663
[air hissing]
46
00:02:01,665 --> 00:02:03,999
I give you the Delaptadon!
47
00:02:04,001 --> 00:02:04,533
[gun cocks]
48
00:02:04,535 --> 00:02:05,000
[gunshot]
49
00:02:05,002 --> 00:02:05,267
Aah!
50
00:02:05,269 --> 00:02:06,735
I'm okay. I'm okay.
51
00:02:06,737 --> 00:02:08,370
Slight miscalculation.
52
00:02:08,372 --> 00:02:12,033
Science must not be stopped.
I shall attempt again.
53
00:02:13,447 --> 00:02:15,744
I give you the mighty
Triactador!
54
00:02:15,746 --> 00:02:16,678
[gunshot]
55
00:02:16,680 --> 00:02:18,513
[screams]
56
00:02:18,515 --> 00:02:21,954
I, Professor Cornelius
Q. Quibblefingers, shall persevere!
57
00:02:21,955 --> 00:02:24,440
I shallachieve the impossible!
58
00:02:24,788 --> 00:02:28,223
I give you the ever-rare
Brontioslauradon!
59
00:02:28,225 --> 00:02:29,324
[gunshots]
60
00:02:29,326 --> 00:02:30,559
Aah! Aah! Aah!
61
00:02:30,561 --> 00:02:31,927
I must not stop.
62
00:02:31,929 --> 00:02:34,754
I must get to the magnificent
dinosaurs!
63
00:02:37,168 --> 00:02:38,727
Eureka!
64
00:02:39,736 --> 00:02:40,969
[gunshots]
65
00:02:40,971 --> 00:02:42,370
Oh, the irony!
66
00:02:42,372 --> 00:02:43,440
[gunshots]
67
00:02:43,475 --> 00:02:44,940
So beautiful!
68
00:02:44,942 --> 00:02:46,208
[gunshots]
69
00:02:46,210 --> 00:02:48,025
What a marvel of nature!
70
00:02:48,245 --> 00:02:49,544
[crying]
71
00:02:49,546 --> 00:02:51,313
Frankie? Sweetie?
72
00:02:51,315 --> 00:02:53,481
Oh, mumsy! Oh, dadums!
73
00:02:53,483 --> 00:02:54,616
Oh, God.
74
00:02:54,618 --> 00:02:59,392
Philip and I-- We had a fight...
A terrible, terrible fight,
75
00:02:59,427 --> 00:03:03,495
and he -- he broke
up with [sobbing] me!
76
00:03:03,530 --> 00:03:05,371
Maybe if you tried dating a
girl for once.
77
00:03:05,371 --> 00:03:06,603
Frank! Be nice.
78
00:03:06,605 --> 00:03:07,271
Nice?
79
00:03:07,273 --> 00:03:11,256
Nice is a father who wants his
son to have the best of everything
80
00:03:11,291 --> 00:03:14,087
and digs through fresh
graves for two weeks--
81
00:03:14,113 --> 00:03:17,989
Two weeks-- to find a big,
thick, veiny penis to give him.
82
00:03:18,024 --> 00:03:20,617
And then you go and put the heart
of a little schoolgirl in his chest.
83
00:03:20,619 --> 00:03:23,560
I wanted him to have some
sensitivity, unlike his father.
84
00:03:23,889 --> 00:03:25,188
I'm so sorry, sweetie.
85
00:03:25,190 --> 00:03:26,757
Is there anything we can do?
86
00:03:26,759 --> 00:03:27,591
Oh, mumsy!
87
00:03:27,593 --> 00:03:30,636
He said he never wanted to talk
to me again!
88
00:03:30,671 --> 00:03:31,942
And if you were a real man,
89
00:03:32,012 --> 00:03:34,013
you would have ripped off
his lower jaw
90
00:03:34,048 --> 00:03:37,011
so he couldn't talk
to you, or anyone else, ever!
91
00:03:37,236 --> 00:03:38,702
Oh, dadums--
92
00:03:38,704 --> 00:03:41,138
Dad! Call me Dad! Or Pops!
93
00:03:41,140 --> 00:03:43,607
Or Pa! The old man!
Anything!
94
00:03:43,609 --> 00:03:45,509
Frank!
But for the love of God--
95
00:03:45,511 --> 00:03:48,050
Stop that, Frank.
Can't you see he's in pain?
96
00:03:48,085 --> 00:03:49,946
A pitchfork in the chest--
That's pain, okay?
97
00:03:50,082 --> 00:03:52,215
Somebody lighting your
nuts on fire-- That's pain!
98
00:03:52,217 --> 00:03:54,251
Emotional pain.
99
00:03:54,253 --> 00:03:56,370
[groans]
100
00:03:57,089 --> 00:03:59,156
Hi, Mr. Frankenstein.
101
00:03:59,158 --> 00:04:00,482
Ugh.
102
00:04:01,860 --> 00:04:03,842
Is Frankenberry home?
103
00:04:04,897 --> 00:04:06,029
Philip?
104
00:04:06,031 --> 00:04:08,198
Frankie, I-I'm sorry.
105
00:04:08,200 --> 00:04:09,881
I didn't mean
all those things I said.
106
00:04:09,916 --> 00:04:12,581
- There's-- there's just been so much--
- Oh, Philip. I don't care.
107
00:04:12,616 --> 00:04:16,273
I don't want to lose you.
You're my yummy mummy.
108
00:04:16,275 --> 00:04:19,276
[both crying]
109
00:04:19,278 --> 00:04:20,243
Ugh. All right.
110
00:04:20,245 --> 00:04:22,097
I'm going upstairs
to take a shit.
111
00:04:22,114 --> 00:04:25,302
Maybe I can mold some sort of a
real son out of that.
112
00:04:25,751 --> 00:04:27,384
Excuse me, God.
113
00:04:28,389 --> 00:04:31,311
Can you make something so heavy
even you can't lift it?
114
00:04:31,824 --> 00:04:34,530
I am fucking eating!
Jesus?!
115
00:04:35,027 --> 00:04:35,926
Yes?
116
00:04:35,928 --> 00:04:38,191
Get this guy out of my face.
117
00:04:38,797 --> 00:04:40,761
- All right. Come on.
- I thought you were cool, man!
118
00:04:40,796 --> 00:04:42,187
I thought
you were gonna be cool.
119
00:04:43,635 --> 00:04:45,969
Throw it in the fire,
Mr. Frodo.
120
00:04:45,971 --> 00:04:49,700
No! The ring is mine, Sam!
121
00:04:54,366 --> 00:04:58,882
My precious!
Give us back my precious!
122
00:04:58,917 --> 00:04:59,783
Bleh!
123
00:04:59,785 --> 00:05:05,857
We found Hobbitses' finger, but
where is my precious?
124
00:05:05,892 --> 00:05:09,308
It's there.
It's-- It's just further back.
125
00:05:10,929 --> 00:05:12,062
[choking]
126
00:05:12,064 --> 00:05:13,163
It's there.
127
00:05:13,165 --> 00:05:16,621
Yeah, right there.
But it's stuck.
128
00:05:16,656 --> 00:05:19,713
You'll have to use your tongue
and get it all wet.
129
00:05:19,748 --> 00:05:21,371
You're almost there.
130
00:05:21,373 --> 00:05:23,473
Just a little more.
131
00:05:23,475 --> 00:05:26,525
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yes.
132
00:05:26,560 --> 00:05:27,350
Yes!
133
00:05:27,385 --> 00:05:30,080
The shire!
134
00:05:30,082 --> 00:05:32,249
Where's precious?
135
00:05:32,251 --> 00:05:35,706
Here. You've earned it.
136
00:05:35,741 --> 00:05:37,473
My precious!
137
00:05:37,508 --> 00:05:38,688
[laughs]
138
00:05:45,665 --> 00:05:47,046
Whoopsie.
139
00:05:47,081 --> 00:05:51,013
If Hobbitses puts
my precious on,
140
00:05:51,048 --> 00:05:54,911
we will have to try and
takes it again, won't we?
141
00:05:54,946 --> 00:05:56,540
Mm-hmm.
142
00:05:57,224 --> 00:06:00,238
I got a large double
half-caf, non-fat mocha with soy
143
00:06:00,273 --> 00:06:02,646
- for Kltpzysam?
- That's Kltpzyxm.
144
00:06:02,648 --> 00:06:04,897
Oh! No, wait!
145
00:06:04,932 --> 00:06:05,182
[poof!]
146
00:06:06,282 --> 00:06:08,251
[laughs] Better luck next
time, Mxyzptlk!
147
00:06:08,253 --> 00:06:10,150
Dude, you can't be back here.
148
00:06:10,646 --> 00:06:12,389
The L.Z. may be swarming
with covenant, marines,
149
00:06:12,391 --> 00:06:15,202
but you'll have the master chief
backing you up.
150
00:06:15,237 --> 00:06:17,924
I'm sorry I can't show you what
I really look like.
151
00:06:17,959 --> 00:06:19,473
Chief, do we have enough
ammo for all these--
152
00:06:19,508 --> 00:06:21,598
I'm gonna have to stop you
right there, soldier.
153
00:06:21,600 --> 00:06:25,854
I know I look pretty generic, but
that's so you can identify with me.
154
00:06:28,033 --> 00:06:28,638
Does anyone have a question
155
00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:32,242
that's not about
what I look like?
156
00:06:32,730 --> 00:06:35,010
All right, then.
This is it, boys.
157
00:06:35,045 --> 00:06:36,680
[helicopter blades whirring]
158
00:06:36,682 --> 00:06:40,684
[gunfire]
159
00:06:40,686 --> 00:06:43,980
[coughs]
I'm dying, chief!
160
00:06:44,015 --> 00:06:47,593
If you think I'll give you a
dying peek at my face, I'm sorry.
161
00:06:47,628 --> 00:06:49,188
Not gonna happen.
162
00:06:49,223 --> 00:06:53,735
Despite thousands of years of people readily
identifying with distinct protagonists,
163
00:06:53,770 --> 00:06:57,621
I believe showing my face
would alienate my audience.
164
00:06:57,656 --> 00:06:59,075
Will you shut the fuck up!
165
00:06:59,110 --> 00:07:01,033
Where is your gun?!
166
00:07:03,976 --> 00:07:04,741
What?!
167
00:07:04,743 --> 00:07:07,225
I can't tell what you're doing
with your face!
168
00:07:07,260 --> 00:07:07,884
It's a secret.
169
00:07:07,919 --> 00:07:10,428
Well, you better be crying in
there, dickbag, because you were
170
00:07:10,463 --> 00:07:11,761
our last line of defense.
171
00:07:14,019 --> 00:07:17,257
I swear, your expression better
be one of awed epiphany at how
172
00:07:17,292 --> 00:07:18,710
badly you just fucked up
right now.
173
00:07:20,592 --> 00:07:22,985
Can I use your gun if I find
you a needler?
174
00:07:23,020 --> 00:07:24,194
What the fuck did you just
say to me?
175
00:07:24,462 --> 00:07:27,552
If you want to call me an asshole,
you better say it to my face!
176
00:07:27,799 --> 00:07:31,828
You three drowned and melted a woman
based on the color of her skin.
177
00:07:31,863 --> 00:07:33,956
In this court's eyes,
that is a hate crime.
178
00:07:33,991 --> 00:07:35,465
- It was Doro--
- Shut up, Lion!
179
00:07:35,500 --> 00:07:37,121
I don't want to go down for
that bitch!
180
00:07:37,156 --> 00:07:39,499
She ain't missing me
"Most of All," is she?
181
00:07:39,534 --> 00:07:42,278
The court finds you guilty of
murder and sentences you to 10
182
00:07:42,280 --> 00:07:45,076
to 15 years in a
maximum-security prison.
183
00:07:45,483 --> 00:07:47,049
But that ain't fair!
184
00:07:47,051 --> 00:07:48,584
Who was our lawyer?
185
00:07:48,586 --> 00:07:52,022
Sorry, boys-- Good at
flying, bad at lawyering.
186
00:07:55,359 --> 00:07:57,760
I'm gonna rape me a robot
tonight!
187
00:07:59,497 --> 00:08:01,811
Got a new fish for you,
Simmons.
188
00:08:03,768 --> 00:08:04,667
That's my bunk.
189
00:08:04,669 --> 00:08:06,243
Oh, I'm sorry.
190
00:08:06,278 --> 00:08:08,304
- I'll move it down to--
- That one's taken, too, silly straw.
191
00:08:08,306 --> 00:08:11,040
Oh. Okay, um, where do I--
192
00:08:11,042 --> 00:08:13,829
Well, I'll rent you that bunk up
there, but the rent ain't cheap.
193
00:08:14,078 --> 00:08:14,884
That'd be just swell.
194
00:08:14,985 --> 00:08:17,285
You got any jelly or some
kind of syrup or something?
195
00:08:17,582 --> 00:08:18,414
Hmm? For what?
196
00:08:18,416 --> 00:08:20,693
For eating my dick with!
197
00:08:20,728 --> 00:08:23,419
You want that bunk, you got to
toss my salad, prag, or you can
198
00:08:23,454 --> 00:08:25,840
let me add some stuffing to your
muffin-- either way.
199
00:08:26,524 --> 00:08:28,324
[prisoners shouting]
200
00:08:28,326 --> 00:08:31,160
[crying]
201
00:08:31,162 --> 00:08:33,229
Oh, don't listen to them.
202
00:08:33,231 --> 00:08:35,974
They don't have to be so mean.
203
00:08:36,009 --> 00:08:38,843
Come on, buddy.
You've got courage now.
204
00:08:38,878 --> 00:08:40,603
We do a simple dime to 15.
205
00:08:40,605 --> 00:08:41,904
I guess you're right.
206
00:08:41,906 --> 00:08:45,845
Of course I'm right.
You'll see. It's gonna be fine.
207
00:08:54,234 --> 00:08:56,585
"I just don't have the heart."
208
00:08:56,587 --> 00:09:00,389
[crying]
209
00:09:00,391 --> 00:09:02,282
[buzzer]
210
00:09:05,363 --> 00:09:08,413
Oh, Scarecrow, what has
happened to you?
211
00:09:08,448 --> 00:09:10,080
[chuckles]
This place--
212
00:09:10,115 --> 00:09:11,567
This place happened to me.
213
00:09:11,569 --> 00:09:12,701
Is it that bad?
214
00:09:12,703 --> 00:09:14,403
It ain't Kansas, sugarpop.
215
00:09:14,405 --> 00:09:17,151
Oh, dear!
Is there anything I can do?
216
00:09:17,186 --> 00:09:18,470
Why don't you show me a
little skin?
217
00:09:18,809 --> 00:09:20,774
Put 'em on the glass.
218
00:09:20,809 --> 00:09:23,979
- Um, I'm sure I don't know--
- Your tits! Your totos!
219
00:09:23,981 --> 00:09:25,847
Put 'em on the glass!
220
00:09:27,151 --> 00:09:30,319
[crying]
221
00:09:30,321 --> 00:09:33,143
No, I can't. I just can't.
222
00:09:33,178 --> 00:09:33,622
[sobbing]
223
00:09:33,624 --> 00:09:36,334
Auntie Em raised a real bitch.
224
00:09:37,999 --> 00:09:40,062
Oh, no.
No. No, no.
225
00:09:40,064 --> 00:09:41,597
No, no, no, no.
226
00:09:41,599 --> 00:09:43,065
Noooooo!
227
00:09:43,067 --> 00:09:46,569
[sobbing]
228
00:09:46,571 --> 00:09:48,737
I swear, that's the truth--
229
00:09:48,739 --> 00:09:50,513
And I ain't lion.
230
00:09:50,575 --> 00:09:51,807
[laughs]
231
00:09:51,809 --> 00:09:53,976
[growls]
232
00:09:53,978 --> 00:09:56,211
[groans]
233
00:09:56,213 --> 00:09:57,079
[groans]
234
00:09:57,081 --> 00:09:58,113
[Whip! Whip! Whip!]
235
00:09:58,115 --> 00:10:00,249
[clong!]
236
00:10:00,251 --> 00:10:02,885
Let's see what you're made of!
237
00:10:02,887 --> 00:10:04,753
You like jelly?!
238
00:10:04,755 --> 00:10:06,889
It's a streamer party!
239
00:10:06,891 --> 00:10:08,023
[laughs]
240
00:10:08,025 --> 00:10:10,759
Who's tossing whose salad now?!
241
00:10:10,761 --> 00:10:12,094
[laughs]
242
00:10:12,096 --> 00:10:13,462
[Whack! Whack!]
243
00:10:13,464 --> 00:10:14,897
Do you have any last words?
244
00:10:14,899 --> 00:10:17,766
If you only had the balls.
245
00:10:17,768 --> 00:10:19,546
Well, we are going to
electrocute you.
246
00:10:19,581 --> 00:10:20,836
[chuckles]
247
00:10:20,838 --> 00:10:23,276
Light up my life!
248
00:10:23,808 --> 00:10:25,040
[electricity crackles]
249
00:10:25,042 --> 00:10:26,609
[zap!]
250
00:10:26,611 --> 00:10:29,979
[sobbing]
251
00:10:29,981 --> 00:10:31,981
[squeak]
252
00:10:50,662 --> 00:10:53,319
Ba-da-ba ba-da-bap, Superman!
253
00:10:58,327 --> 00:11:03,254
Sync and Edits: VeRdiKT
[Addic7ed.com]
254
00:12:06,804 --> 00:12:08,237
Go! Go! Go!
255
00:12:08,239 --> 00:12:10,973
Get as much as you can
so you can rank up faster.
256
00:12:10,975 --> 00:12:14,243
Mountain dew game fuel
with double xp spotted.
257
00:12:14,245 --> 00:12:15,444
Target acquired.
258
00:12:15,446 --> 00:12:16,579
Let's move out.
259
00:12:16,581 --> 00:12:17,947
Come on greg.
260
00:12:17,949 --> 00:12:19,115
Greg.
261
00:12:19,117 --> 00:12:20,349
Greg!
262
00:12:20,351 --> 00:12:22,651
Greg!
263
00:12:22,653 --> 00:12:24,920
What are you waiting for --
a care package?
264
00:12:24,922 --> 00:12:26,722
Come on man, let's go.
265
00:12:26,724 --> 00:12:28,357
[male announcer] There's
modern warfare 3 double xp
266
00:12:28,359 --> 00:12:29,859
Under every cap
of mountain dew,
267
00:12:29,861 --> 00:12:30,793
Plus other great prizes.
268
00:12:30,795 --> 00:12:32,661
Enter codes at dewxp.Com.
269
00:12:33,230 --> 00:12:34,096
Plus other great prizes.
Hey, wendy!
270
00:12:34,131 --> 00:12:35,865
Love your asiago
ranch chicken club.
271
00:12:35,899 --> 00:12:37,933
But he says,
'all chicken's
the same.'
272
00:12:37,968 --> 00:12:39,335
Well, did you tell
him it's got...
273
00:12:39,369 --> 00:12:40,236
Fresh cooked bacon...
274
00:12:40,270 --> 00:12:41,303
Asiago cheese...
275
00:12:41,338 --> 00:12:44,373
And zesty ranch on
your choice of fillet?
276
00:12:44,407 --> 00:12:46,375
Gets 'em every time.