1
00:00:23,586 --> 00:00:25,685
Man:
It's alive!
2
00:00:33,794 --> 00:00:36,267
Huhnmorder:
3
00:00:55,849 --> 00:00:58,652
You know, I you like
you're fat-shaming me.
4
00:00:58,687 --> 00:01:00,489
Ball pit!
Whoo!
5
00:01:00,524 --> 00:01:02,986
Help!
Aah!
6
00:01:10,435 --> 00:01:12,633
Aha!
Mojo Jojo is in jail now
7
00:01:12,668 --> 00:01:14,602
but will break out to fight
the Powerpuff Girls again
8
00:01:14,637 --> 00:01:16,307
for you to put in jail again --
No. Wait.
9
00:01:16,342 --> 00:01:18,177
Is that Mojo Jojo's life?
Oh, my God.
10
00:01:18,212 --> 00:01:19,805
Mojo Jojo needs to sit down
for a minute.
11
00:01:19,840 --> 00:01:21,939
Shut up, monkey!
It's not our problem!
12
00:01:21,974 --> 00:01:24,876
But maybe if Townsville
funneled more resources
13
00:01:24,911 --> 00:01:26,614
into rehabilitative justice,
14
00:01:26,649 --> 00:01:29,518
he'd grow from a villain
into a civilian.
15
00:01:29,553 --> 00:01:31,982
All Mojo Jojo wants in life
is a stable home and career,
16
00:01:32,017 --> 00:01:33,753
maybe start a pottery shop
in Santa Fe.
17
00:01:33,788 --> 00:01:36,085
You know, one where all they
sell are turquoise necklaces.
18
00:01:36,120 --> 00:01:37,757
But Mojo Jojo has
no other choice now.
19
00:01:37,792 --> 00:01:38,890
God damn it!
20
00:01:38,925 --> 00:01:40,595
The punitive justice system
21
00:01:40,630 --> 00:01:42,531
never gave him the chance
to grow!
22
00:01:42,566 --> 00:01:44,995
How did we become part
of such a terrible cycle?
23
00:01:45,030 --> 00:01:46,898
The mayor.
24
00:01:46,933 --> 00:01:48,504
Girls!
25
00:01:48,539 --> 00:01:51,969
Fuzzy Lumpkins is plotting
to poison the Townsville River!
26
00:01:52,004 --> 00:01:54,004
You mean the destitute
banjo player
27
00:01:54,039 --> 00:01:57,711
forced to live in the forest due
to your city gentrification?!
28
00:01:57,746 --> 00:01:59,251
Angry-face punch!
Ha!
- Ow!
29
00:01:59,286 --> 00:02:02,650
Maybe if you cared about more
than just the Townsville 1%,
30
00:02:02,685 --> 00:02:04,817
Fuzzy could contribute
to society!
31
00:02:04,852 --> 00:02:07,116
Ooh! Girls!
I'm a good guy!
32
00:02:07,151 --> 00:02:08,293
Oh, Mayor.
33
00:02:08,328 --> 00:02:11,197
You're not a good guy.
You're a bootlicker.
34
00:02:11,232 --> 00:02:13,727
Narrator:
And so Townsville is saved
35
00:02:13,762 --> 00:02:16,466
from its greatest villain yet,
The Man!
36
00:02:16,501 --> 00:02:18,303
Okay.
- It's pure adrenaline, Vincent.
37
00:02:18,338 --> 00:02:20,404
You stab it
right into her heart.
38
00:02:20,439 --> 00:02:24,166
One, two, three.
Syringe!
39
00:02:24,201 --> 00:02:25,673
Oh, yeah.
40
00:02:25,708 --> 00:02:27,972
I guess feet don't have hearts.
Sorry, buddy.
41
00:02:28,007 --> 00:02:31,382
She was just...so sexy.
42
00:02:33,617 --> 00:02:35,584
So what's the dealie
with MJ?
43
00:02:35,619 --> 00:02:37,817
You're difficult to track down,
Spider-Man.
44
00:02:37,852 --> 00:02:41,623
Aah! Nick Fury?
- Why did you tranquilize Ned?
45
00:02:41,658 --> 00:02:43,955
It was gonna be
a kick-ass reveal for me.
46
00:02:43,990 --> 00:02:45,957
Look.
Maybe he's okay.
47
00:02:45,992 --> 00:02:47,860
Oh, Mr. Fury,
those are his brains!
48
00:02:47,895 --> 00:02:49,059
It's okay!
49
00:02:49,094 --> 00:02:51,831
I've read that humans use
like 10% of their brains.
50
00:02:51,866 --> 00:02:53,470
Maybe this is the --
Shit.
51
00:02:53,505 --> 00:02:55,032
Maybe this is the part
he doesn't use.
52
00:02:55,067 --> 00:02:56,968
Lights out, boys.
53
00:02:57,003 --> 00:02:58,035
Aah!
54
00:02:58,070 --> 00:02:59,905
Oh, so many brains!
55
00:02:59,940 --> 00:03:01,775
MJ, no!
Mr. Fury!
56
00:03:01,810 --> 00:03:03,843
Aw, Mr. Fury!
- That wasn't me!
57
00:03:03,878 --> 00:03:05,746
See, this coffee table
shouldn't -- Okay.
58
00:03:05,781 --> 00:03:08,452
Uh...motherfucker!
59
00:03:08,487 --> 00:03:09,519
Mm.
60
00:03:16,088 --> 00:03:18,462
Get over here!
61
00:03:18,497 --> 00:03:20,299
I don't know
if you noticed,
62
00:03:20,334 --> 00:03:23,368
but, uh, when I was
digging around in there,
63
00:03:23,403 --> 00:03:25,029
I think I saw something.
64
00:03:25,064 --> 00:03:27,097
Something?
What, like a lump?
65
00:03:27,132 --> 00:03:28,868
Saying you saw something
is, like,
66
00:03:28,903 --> 00:03:30,903
some heavy shit
- to drop on someone, man.
67
00:03:30,938 --> 00:03:32,806
Let me take another look!
68
00:03:32,841 --> 00:03:34,907
You might want to bite down
on something.
69
00:03:36,108 --> 00:03:38,416
I'm not really seeing anything.
70
00:03:38,451 --> 00:03:40,044
Maybe the light
might have hit it weird.
71
00:03:40,079 --> 00:03:41,111
Are you kidding?
72
00:03:41,146 --> 00:03:42,882
I'm looking for
a real answer, bro.
73
00:03:42,917 --> 00:03:45,786
Okay, okay.
- Uh, let me dig a little deeper.
74
00:03:45,821 --> 00:03:48,052
Slam!
75
00:03:48,087 --> 00:03:49,526
Oh! Ah!
76
00:03:49,561 --> 00:03:51,088
Looks like the tip
of my spear
77
00:03:51,123 --> 00:03:54,157
got tangled around your spine
all weird
78
00:03:54,192 --> 00:03:56,368
and made a funky shadow.
79
00:03:56,403 --> 00:04:00,339
Uh, looks like the coast
is clear, buddy!
80
00:04:00,374 --> 00:04:02,231
Finish him!
- Really?
81
00:04:02,266 --> 00:04:04,442
Come on. Finish him.
- Mm.
82
00:04:04,477 --> 00:04:06,004
Okay.
83
00:04:06,039 --> 00:04:08,710
Fatality!
Scorpion wins.
84
00:04:12,782 --> 00:04:15,453
Did hit me
with your butt?
85
00:04:15,488 --> 00:04:17,521
Ow!
86
00:04:17,556 --> 00:04:19,655
Ow! My teeth!
Hi. I'm Nightwing.
87
00:04:19,690 --> 00:04:22,020
Have you ever wished for a
delicious-looking superhero butt
88
00:04:22,055 --> 00:04:23,054
like mine?
89
00:04:23,089 --> 00:04:25,056
Make that wish come true
with Nightbutt.
90
00:04:25,091 --> 00:04:27,597
It's the first all-in-one
butt exerciser
91
00:04:27,632 --> 00:04:29,291
that's sure to sculpt, tone,
92
00:04:29,326 --> 00:04:32,096
and train your glutes
to take out brutes.
93
00:04:32,131 --> 00:04:35,066
You'll learn moves like...
94
00:04:38,511 --> 00:04:39,543
Ow!
95
00:04:41,481 --> 00:04:43,547
And, of course...
96
00:04:43,582 --> 00:04:44,812
So tight!
97
00:04:44,847 --> 00:04:48,750
So get your rear in gear
and get the Nightbutt!
98
00:04:48,785 --> 00:04:50,851
Tell 'em Dick sent ya. Nightbutt.
99
00:04:55,594 --> 00:04:59,288
Can you read the top line?
I tawt I taw a puddy tat!
100
00:04:59,323 --> 00:05:00,795
No.
That's an "H."
101
00:05:00,830 --> 00:05:02,731
I'm wegally bwind.
102
00:05:02,766 --> 00:05:05,030
...and after I returned
the last Infinity Stone,
103
00:05:05,065 --> 00:05:08,099
I came here to the past
to spend my life with you.
104
00:05:08,134 --> 00:05:09,837
I don't know what that will do
to the timeline,
105
00:05:09,872 --> 00:05:11,036
so I got to be careful.
106
00:05:11,071 --> 00:05:14,105
As long as we're together,
it doesn't matter.
107
00:05:14,140 --> 00:05:15,381
Boy.
108
00:05:15,416 --> 00:05:16,415
Okay.
109
00:05:16,450 --> 00:05:17,977
I changed the oil,
mowed the lawn,
110
00:05:18,012 --> 00:05:19,517
and repaired
the garage door.
111
00:05:19,552 --> 00:05:23,246
Oh, I w-would have helped out.
But you know that timeline.
112
00:05:23,281 --> 00:05:24,984
Oh, my God.
113
00:05:25,019 --> 00:05:26,458
Did you pee in these?
- Yeah.
114
00:05:26,493 --> 00:05:28,724
Couldn't risk the timeline
by walking to the bathroom.
115
00:05:28,759 --> 00:05:30,627
Then how did you get
those snacks?
116
00:05:30,662 --> 00:05:33,190
I bounce this fine-china serving
tray off several walls
117
00:05:33,225 --> 00:05:35,060
into the kitchen
as if it's my shield.
118
00:05:35,095 --> 00:05:37,799
It collects all my snacks,
bounces back to my hand.
119
00:05:37,834 --> 00:05:40,362
Watch.
120
00:05:40,397 --> 00:05:41,968
It works
when you're not here.
121
00:05:42,003 --> 00:05:44,575
Steve! You're back!
122
00:05:44,610 --> 00:05:46,973
And I brought you something, Sam.
123
00:05:47,008 --> 00:05:48,238
Your shield!
124
00:05:48,273 --> 00:05:51,813
I sold my shield for snacks,
but this works just as well.
125
00:05:51,848 --> 00:05:53,177
And it's yours now, Sam.
126
00:05:53,212 --> 00:05:54,519
Gee. Thanks!
127
00:05:54,554 --> 00:05:56,719
A fine-china
serving tray
128
00:05:56,754 --> 00:05:58,688
that looks hastily
glued together.
129
00:05:58,723 --> 00:06:01,526
You know what a guy forgets
about 1945, Sam?
130
00:06:01,561 --> 00:06:03,924
The snacks.
They're terrible.
131
00:06:03,959 --> 00:06:06,289
Hey, do we still have
that vending machine in HQ?
132
00:06:06,324 --> 00:06:08,357
We do.
It actually survived --
Oh, great!
133
00:06:08,392 --> 00:06:10,194
I'm gonna get
some Sour Patch Kids.
134
00:06:10,229 --> 00:06:11,767
You want anything?
- I'm good.
135
00:06:11,802 --> 00:06:13,703
Fantastic.
Now watch this drive.
136
00:06:15,905 --> 00:06:17,036
Are you okay?
137
00:06:17,071 --> 00:06:19,676
I made a terrible mistake, Sam.
138
00:06:21,977 --> 00:06:23,075
Holy shit!
139
00:06:23,110 --> 00:06:24,846
I found a way
to save Moo Moo Farm!
140
00:06:24,881 --> 00:06:27,948
- They're paying us 20
- K just to have some go-karts
141
00:06:27,983 --> 00:06:30,016
whiz around the property
a few times!
142
00:06:30,051 --> 00:06:31,281
That's amazin'!
143
00:06:31,316 --> 00:06:34,218
Should we clear the cows
and gophers from the roads?
144
00:06:34,253 --> 00:06:36,055
Nah! How much trouble
could they cause?
145
00:06:38,191 --> 00:06:39,421
Aah!
Oh, my God!
146
00:06:39,456 --> 00:06:41,632
Oh, my Lord!
147
00:06:43,900 --> 00:06:44,965
Oh, no!
The gophers!
148
00:06:48,399 --> 00:06:49,871
My house!
149
00:06:49,906 --> 00:06:51,510
My crops!
150
00:06:51,545 --> 00:06:53,006
I'm-a gonna win!
151
00:06:53,041 --> 00:06:55,910
Come on!
Time for-a Koopa Troopa Beach!
152
00:06:55,945 --> 00:06:57,747
It's gone!
It's all gone!
153
00:06:57,782 --> 00:06:58,781
Maybe not! Look!
154
00:06:58,816 --> 00:07:00,717
They left
one of those rainbow boxes.
155
00:07:00,752 --> 00:07:02,752
Maybe something inside
can help us.
156
00:07:02,787 --> 00:07:04,985
Nellie, no! That question mark
is upside down!
157
00:07:05,020 --> 00:07:06,921
Oh, God!
Nellie!
158
00:07:06,956 --> 00:07:08,956
Young man:
Hey, at least her head's here.
Dad can work with that.
159
00:07:08,991 --> 00:07:10,419
Oh! Nellie!
160
00:07:10,454 --> 00:07:11,662
Oh, dear!
161
00:07:11,697 --> 00:07:13,796
My pound has
too many cute animals.
162
00:07:13,831 --> 00:07:15,424
They'll never be adopted.
163
00:07:15,459 --> 00:07:17,426
My alligator farm
is broke.
164
00:07:17,461 --> 00:07:19,901
All my alligators
are gonna starve!
165
00:07:19,936 --> 00:07:23,201
Did we just solve
each other's problems?
Did we just solve
each other's problems?
166
00:07:23,236 --> 00:07:25,203
Narrator:
And so the alligator farm
167
00:07:25,238 --> 00:07:28,239
set aside space for the pound
to offer animal adoptions,
168
00:07:28,274 --> 00:07:32,177
and the adoption fees went
toward feeding the alligators.
169
00:07:32,212 --> 00:07:34,817
Wait. Did you expect they would
feed the pound animals
170
00:07:34,852 --> 00:07:35,983
to the alligators?
171
00:07:36,018 --> 00:07:37,523
Oh. Wow.
My God.
172
00:07:37,558 --> 00:07:40,317
You seem very jaded
and worn down by the world.
173
00:07:40,352 --> 00:07:44,057
Try to take some time each day
to meditate.
174
00:07:44,092 --> 00:07:46,290
I hate office
Christmas parties.
175
00:07:46,325 --> 00:07:48,666
Yeah. Why does Alice always get
so aggressive?
176
00:07:48,701 --> 00:07:52,494
Dilbert, is your dick curved
like your tie,
177
00:07:52,529 --> 00:07:55,332
or is your tie curved
like your dick?
178
00:07:55,367 --> 00:07:58,170
Now, now.
Leave Dilbert's tie alone.
179
00:07:58,205 --> 00:08:01,140
It is literally the only
interesting thing about him.
180
00:08:01,175 --> 00:08:02,339
It is not!
181
00:08:02,374 --> 00:08:06,948
Lazy, stupid, violent,
evil, scary, genius, necktie.
182
00:08:06,983 --> 00:08:08,411
I see your point.
183
00:08:08,446 --> 00:08:11,821
I'm Hal Bruber,
international terrorist.
184
00:08:11,856 --> 00:08:13,889
Which one of you is the boss?
185
00:08:13,924 --> 00:08:15,693
The joke's on you.
186
00:08:15,728 --> 00:08:18,564
This is a socialist collective.
187
00:08:19,490 --> 00:08:21,325
Oh, fuck you guys.
188
00:08:21,360 --> 00:08:24,031
I demand to know the combination
to the safe.
189
00:08:24,066 --> 00:08:25,670
Whoa!
We have a safe?
190
00:08:25,705 --> 00:08:28,574
Don't ask me. I don't have
any qualifications for this job.
191
00:08:28,609 --> 00:08:31,236
I wouldn't even know
what to put inside a safe.
192
00:08:31,271 --> 00:08:33,403
Nobody knows what we do
at this company.
193
00:08:33,438 --> 00:08:35,174
Hey, Carol, what do we do
at this company?
194
00:08:36,650 --> 00:08:37,814
Oh, my!
195
00:08:37,849 --> 00:08:39,651
Someone's gonna get written up
for that.
196
00:08:39,686 --> 00:08:41,543
That's not good.
197
00:08:42,821 --> 00:08:44,315
Alice:
Festive!
198
00:08:46,286 --> 00:08:48,726
Let's make a break for it.
199
00:08:48,761 --> 00:08:51,223
Nah. I want to see
who gets shot next.
200
00:08:58,100 --> 00:08:59,264
Asok was right.
201
00:08:59,299 --> 00:09:02,366
This necktie is literally
all I have going for me.
202
00:09:02,401 --> 00:09:04,335
Hello?
I need help!
203
00:09:04,370 --> 00:09:06,612
The terrorists are going to
kill everyone.
204
00:09:06,647 --> 00:09:08,977
Look, it's not like we get
a special cop bonus
205
00:09:09,012 --> 00:09:11,078
if everyone survives
in there.
206
00:09:11,113 --> 00:09:13,146
Do whatever.
207
00:09:14,820 --> 00:09:16,479
At last!
208
00:09:16,514 --> 00:09:19,922
You're not a terrorist at all.
You're just a thief!
209
00:09:19,957 --> 00:09:22,661
It's not stealing if you're
taking back what's yours!
210
00:09:22,696 --> 00:09:23,992
Reveal!
211
00:09:24,027 --> 00:09:27,061
Television and musical
sensation Jim Rash?
212
00:09:27,096 --> 00:09:28,557
I'm Scott Adams, shithead,
213
00:09:28,592 --> 00:09:30,526
creator of the Dilbert
comic strip!
214
00:09:30,561 --> 00:09:33,199
And within this box is
all the good will from readers
215
00:09:33,234 --> 00:09:34,970
I've built up
after decades!
216
00:09:38,877 --> 00:09:41,603
What possible use could you have
for reader good will?
217
00:09:41,638 --> 00:09:43,913
The more readers remember
enjoying my comic,
218
00:09:43,948 --> 00:09:46,575
the more they'll tolerate me
when I say things like,
219
00:09:46,610 --> 00:09:49,017
"White men are being erased
from this culture!"
220
00:09:49,052 --> 00:09:51,580
Why would you even want to say
something like that?
221
00:09:51,615 --> 00:09:53,021
Because it's true!
222
00:09:53,056 --> 00:09:56,156
My Dilbert cartoon on UPN
was canceled because I'm white!
223
00:09:56,191 --> 00:09:57,421
But it wasn't funny.
224
00:09:57,456 --> 00:09:59,797
It didn't have to be funny!
I'm white!
225
00:09:59,832 --> 00:10:01,590
That used to be
all you needed!
226
00:10:01,625 --> 00:10:03,834
I think you'd better check
the box again.
227
00:10:03,869 --> 00:10:05,396
What the...
228
00:10:05,431 --> 00:10:08,564
Huh?
- Buddy, there's not enough
reader good will in the world
229
00:10:08,599 --> 00:10:11,006
to shield you
from your own wack ass.
230
00:10:11,041 --> 00:10:12,634
No, Dilbert!
- Sneak attack!
231
00:10:12,669 --> 00:10:13,338
Blam!
232
00:10:17,542 --> 00:10:20,576
Well, he died power-humping
an authority symbol.
233
00:10:20,611 --> 00:10:24,052
Very white male way to go.
Got to respect that.
234
00:10:25,220 --> 00:10:28,320
Gun-butt!
Who's boring now, asshole?
235
00:10:28,355 --> 00:10:29,695
And for the record,
236
00:10:29,730 --> 00:10:31,961
...the tie is shaped like my...
237
00:10:31,996 --> 00:10:33,061
Chicken:
238
00:10:33,096 --> 00:10:34,293
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
239
00:10:34,328 --> 00:10:36,196
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk
wawk bawk bawk ♪
240
00:10:36,231 --> 00:10:37,263
Chickens:
241
00:10:37,298 --> 00:10:38,495
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
242
00:10:38,530 --> 00:10:40,431
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk
wawk bawk bawk ♪
243
00:10:40,466 --> 00:10:42,873
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
244
00:10:42,908 --> 00:10:44,666
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk
wawk bawk bawk ♪
245
00:10:44,701 --> 00:10:46,107
Chicken:
Ba-gawk!
246
00:10:46,142 --> 00:10:47,504
Man:
Bawk.