1 00:00:05,512 --> 00:00:07,131 Previously on Weeds... 2 00:00:07,455 --> 00:00:09,550 I've decided that we will get married. 3 00:00:11,428 --> 00:00:13,081 Can we ditch school? 4 00:00:13,472 --> 00:00:14,347 Fuck you! 5 00:00:17,976 --> 00:00:19,368 I'm Huskaroo's girl. 6 00:00:21,897 --> 00:00:24,357 The cop extorting money from me is cracking up. 7 00:00:24,743 --> 00:00:26,025 Bitch-ass bitch. 8 00:00:26,193 --> 00:00:28,152 Blitt and I need to close early for inventory. 9 00:00:28,320 --> 00:00:30,154 Get out! I don't want you in here anymore. 10 00:00:31,448 --> 00:00:32,199 Shit! 11 00:00:32,324 --> 00:00:35,576 Uncle Yitzhak's lost fortune. You said there was, like, $180,000. 12 00:00:35,744 --> 00:00:36,928 Look around you. 13 00:00:37,053 --> 00:00:39,080 You blew all that money on this crap? 14 00:00:39,248 --> 00:00:42,041 I haven't seen you since the ultrasound. Everything looks fine. 15 00:00:42,209 --> 00:00:45,294 Love your shoes. Raylene Reynolds. You're Pretty! cosmetics. 16 00:00:49,299 --> 00:00:51,759 - What the fuck was that? - We cannot get married. 17 00:00:51,927 --> 00:00:53,010 Things have changed. 18 00:01:11,015 --> 00:01:12,194 Hairdryer. 19 00:01:12,319 --> 00:01:14,782 - It's not what you think. - Of course not. 20 00:01:14,950 --> 00:01:17,835 She's just a friend, cousin, coworker, 21 00:01:18,235 --> 00:01:19,317 neighbor... 22 00:01:19,613 --> 00:01:20,663 It's not like that. 23 00:01:20,831 --> 00:01:22,087 What's it like? 24 00:01:22,931 --> 00:01:24,265 'Cause all I know is 25 00:01:24,689 --> 00:01:27,119 some stiletto-heeled Mexicunt 26 00:01:27,244 --> 00:01:28,541 stalks in here, 27 00:01:28,941 --> 00:01:31,193 screeches at you in Spanish, 28 00:01:31,318 --> 00:01:32,883 suddenly the marriage is off. 29 00:01:33,430 --> 00:01:35,000 Her name is Pilar Zuazo. 30 00:01:35,812 --> 00:01:37,041 She is 31 00:01:37,708 --> 00:01:39,515 a very important woman in my life. 32 00:01:41,476 --> 00:01:42,686 In my position, 33 00:01:43,012 --> 00:01:44,389 to marry a foreigner 34 00:01:45,211 --> 00:01:46,494 is bad publicity. 35 00:01:46,619 --> 00:01:49,152 She doesn't want me to jeopardize my political career. 36 00:01:49,277 --> 00:01:52,278 Consider your political career safe, señor mayor. 37 00:01:52,446 --> 00:01:54,572 Wait! This is only a delay. 38 00:01:55,848 --> 00:01:57,241 You must trust me. 39 00:01:57,595 --> 00:01:58,758 After the election, 40 00:01:59,743 --> 00:02:01,412 we will be married and be a family. 41 00:02:01,891 --> 00:02:03,047 What election? 42 00:02:04,113 --> 00:02:06,876 I'm running for governador. 43 00:02:07,687 --> 00:02:09,865 It's the next step in a long journey. 44 00:02:10,902 --> 00:02:11,902 I'm sorry. 45 00:02:12,428 --> 00:02:13,883 I didn't think it through. 46 00:02:15,065 --> 00:02:16,235 The timing... 47 00:02:19,606 --> 00:02:20,556 I was too 48 00:02:20,924 --> 00:02:21,917 impetuous. 49 00:02:22,717 --> 00:02:24,268 Because I love you, Nancy. 50 00:02:24,747 --> 00:02:26,450 You are what I want. 51 00:02:28,573 --> 00:02:31,525 I still don't understand who she is, why you're taking orders from her. 52 00:02:31,693 --> 00:02:34,999 She is someone who has a great deal of influence 53 00:02:35,124 --> 00:02:37,287 with the people who matter in my country. 54 00:02:37,412 --> 00:02:40,242 She makes sure those people support my ambitions. 55 00:02:41,631 --> 00:02:43,037 So, she's your boss? 56 00:02:44,105 --> 00:02:46,682 - No one is my boss. - It sounds like she's your boss. 57 00:02:47,261 --> 00:02:48,461 Come downstairs. 58 00:02:49,690 --> 00:02:51,921 I'll tell Concha to unpack your things. 59 00:02:53,470 --> 00:02:56,890 - You've ever slept with her? - No, it's not like that. 60 00:02:57,610 --> 00:03:00,010 And I am told she has teeth down there. 61 00:03:01,640 --> 00:03:02,890 I don't want to find out. 62 00:03:03,892 --> 00:03:05,269 After the election, 63 00:03:05,581 --> 00:03:08,020 we will be man and wife. 64 00:03:10,688 --> 00:03:11,398 Z, 65 00:03:11,784 --> 00:03:14,510 U, A, Z, O. 66 00:03:15,932 --> 00:03:16,969 Is that her? 67 00:03:17,784 --> 00:03:20,241 - She's hot. - They're fake. 68 00:03:20,531 --> 00:03:22,946 You want her Wikipedia page or the Forbes article? 69 00:03:23,071 --> 00:03:24,146 Try Wiki. 70 00:03:25,553 --> 00:03:28,749 Daughter of late Mexican industrialist Raúl Zuazo. 71 00:03:29,266 --> 00:03:30,599 Silver-spooned oppressor. 72 00:03:30,969 --> 00:03:33,325 Sole heir to vast telecommunications holdings. 73 00:03:33,450 --> 00:03:34,547 Media manipulator. 74 00:03:34,866 --> 00:03:37,675 On the board of the Mexican Stock Exchange. 75 00:03:37,843 --> 00:03:39,014 Inside trader. 76 00:03:39,879 --> 00:03:42,054 - Philanthropist. - Tax evader. 77 00:03:43,330 --> 00:03:45,330 Doesn't say anything about a drug kingpin. 78 00:03:45,455 --> 00:03:46,901 She owns Mexico, mom. 79 00:03:47,026 --> 00:03:48,644 She can have these pages edited. 80 00:03:50,154 --> 00:03:51,724 We need to get the fuck out of here. 81 00:03:51,849 --> 00:03:54,191 These people bludgeon innocent golfers for sport. 82 00:03:54,359 --> 00:03:56,377 - What are you talking about? - They're gonna wait 83 00:03:56,502 --> 00:03:58,863 until you have the baby and then they're gonna kill us. 84 00:03:59,432 --> 00:04:02,099 They don't even need a reason, they'll just do it and laugh. 85 00:04:03,602 --> 00:04:05,870 That's probably them coming after us right now. 86 00:04:23,652 --> 00:04:24,837 What is all this stuff? 87 00:04:24,962 --> 00:04:26,823 We're setting up a birthing room. 88 00:04:27,549 --> 00:04:30,060 Esteban feels that you should have the baby here at home. 89 00:04:31,777 --> 00:04:32,730 Birthing room. 90 00:04:33,682 --> 00:04:35,357 Everything you need will be right here. 91 00:04:36,928 --> 00:04:38,157 How convenient. 92 00:04:39,817 --> 00:04:41,363 They will be no need to ever leave. 93 00:04:44,673 --> 00:04:45,951 What about a flat screen? 94 00:04:46,273 --> 00:04:48,613 Premium cable, one of those little fridges? 95 00:04:50,510 --> 00:04:53,709 - You said everything I need. - I cannot provide those things. 96 00:04:55,103 --> 00:04:57,129 Who should I ask? Esteban? Pilar? 97 00:04:57,799 --> 00:04:58,881 Best Buy. 98 00:05:01,378 --> 00:05:02,474 I'll do that. 99 00:05:03,882 --> 00:05:05,888 Hop over there right now, review my options. 100 00:05:08,104 --> 00:05:10,184 I'll take Shane. Shane loves Best Buy. 101 00:05:10,497 --> 00:05:11,727 Your car's in the shop. 102 00:05:13,475 --> 00:05:14,919 What's wrong with it? 103 00:05:15,623 --> 00:05:16,897 Broken tail light. 104 00:05:23,793 --> 00:05:24,793 These 105 00:05:25,171 --> 00:05:26,208 are my keys. 106 00:05:27,582 --> 00:05:29,134 When I'm not tooling around town 107 00:05:29,259 --> 00:05:31,671 in my cherry red You're Pretty! convertible, 108 00:05:32,308 --> 00:05:34,530 I am cruising in my Maserati. 109 00:05:35,597 --> 00:05:38,170 Three thousand square foot ski chalet in Tahoe. 110 00:05:38,338 --> 00:05:40,008 Ski in, ski out. 111 00:05:41,045 --> 00:05:44,051 My private instructor looks just like Ashton Kutcher. 112 00:05:45,577 --> 00:05:46,887 So, hands up! 113 00:05:47,055 --> 00:05:49,682 Raise those hands! Who wants to be me? 114 00:05:49,850 --> 00:05:51,706 She's much blonder than I would ever go again, 115 00:05:51,831 --> 00:05:53,310 but I do love Tahoe. 116 00:05:53,435 --> 00:05:54,812 Hands down. Forget it. 117 00:05:55,592 --> 00:05:56,855 About 90% of you 118 00:05:57,023 --> 00:05:58,816 simply don't have what it takes. 119 00:06:00,056 --> 00:06:01,878 But for the other 10%, 120 00:06:02,279 --> 00:06:03,558 let me just say, 121 00:06:03,840 --> 00:06:06,615 being me is fantastic. 122 00:06:07,158 --> 00:06:08,617 I think her nipples are hard. 123 00:06:09,277 --> 00:06:10,786 As a matter of fact, they are. 124 00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:14,581 My nipples are hard and my lady is wet. 125 00:06:16,935 --> 00:06:18,168 Because success 126 00:06:18,336 --> 00:06:20,061 turns me on. 127 00:06:20,452 --> 00:06:22,089 And if success doesn't turn you on, 128 00:06:22,257 --> 00:06:25,718 then you can take your initial $5,000 investment fees, 129 00:06:25,886 --> 00:06:28,470 pop on out to your shit cars, and drive out of here. 130 00:06:30,478 --> 00:06:32,044 Okay then. So... 131 00:06:33,348 --> 00:06:34,435 What turns you on? 132 00:06:34,744 --> 00:06:35,811 Success! 133 00:06:36,151 --> 00:06:37,151 Dick. 134 00:06:38,551 --> 00:06:40,181 Am I wrong about you, Celia? 135 00:06:41,026 --> 00:06:42,776 Dick ever buy you a Cartier Panther watch 136 00:06:42,944 --> 00:06:44,153 with double diamonds? 137 00:06:44,321 --> 00:06:45,620 'Cause if it did, 138 00:06:45,945 --> 00:06:47,489 then suck that dick, girl. 139 00:06:48,593 --> 00:06:49,593 But if not, 140 00:06:50,371 --> 00:06:51,744 I need to ask you a question. 141 00:06:52,489 --> 00:06:54,830 Are you a closer or a loser? 142 00:06:57,336 --> 00:06:58,625 Well, I've been a loser. 143 00:07:01,934 --> 00:07:03,213 But I want to be a closer. 144 00:07:04,937 --> 00:07:06,675 But I don't have $5,000, so... 145 00:07:06,843 --> 00:07:09,219 You're going to let a little thing like that stand in your way? 146 00:07:13,452 --> 00:07:14,725 No way. 147 00:07:15,037 --> 00:07:16,143 No way, cow girl. 148 00:07:16,459 --> 00:07:19,023 You're Pretty! will front you on credit 149 00:07:19,148 --> 00:07:21,440 all the products that you need to put yourself on the road 150 00:07:21,608 --> 00:07:22,909 to financial freedom. 151 00:07:23,034 --> 00:07:24,234 Are you ready to ride? 152 00:07:24,982 --> 00:07:25,903 I said, 153 00:07:26,071 --> 00:07:27,693 are you ready to ride? 154 00:07:30,867 --> 00:07:32,826 - Are your nipples hard? - Yes. 155 00:07:35,014 --> 00:07:37,873 But I had reconstructive surgery because of a double mastectomy, 156 00:07:37,998 --> 00:07:39,541 so they're always kind of like that. 157 00:07:41,139 --> 00:07:42,711 Let's get started. 158 00:07:43,009 --> 00:07:44,342 Whatever you need. 159 00:07:47,749 --> 00:07:50,928 It's your fourth THC cone today. You're costing us money. 160 00:07:58,887 --> 00:08:01,235 Double scoop of Cripple Ripple Fudge. 161 00:08:02,421 --> 00:08:03,691 Keep the change. 162 00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:18,029 I think I might actually be addicted to sugar. 163 00:08:20,325 --> 00:08:21,480 I love it here. 164 00:08:21,792 --> 00:08:23,373 This is everything I ever wanted. 165 00:08:23,498 --> 00:08:26,797 Shelves filled with drugs, cold creamy treats flavored with drugs. 166 00:08:27,086 --> 00:08:28,340 Beautiful girls in bikinis 167 00:08:28,508 --> 00:08:30,677 coming and asking me for drugs. 168 00:08:31,219 --> 00:08:33,518 - Are you crying? - Don't look. 169 00:08:34,816 --> 00:08:35,898 Gentlemen, 170 00:08:36,520 --> 00:08:38,684 waking up in my car with a searing headache, 171 00:08:39,054 --> 00:08:41,645 unable to move for some time without blinding pain, 172 00:08:42,357 --> 00:08:44,150 gave me some time to think. 173 00:08:45,112 --> 00:08:46,461 You all were right. 174 00:08:47,661 --> 00:08:51,363 Having the heat lurking around a pot club, bad for business. 175 00:08:52,510 --> 00:08:53,449 So from now on, 176 00:08:53,824 --> 00:08:54,824 when I come in, 177 00:08:55,376 --> 00:08:57,536 I come in my civies. Makes sense. 178 00:08:59,011 --> 00:09:00,522 Do you know this guy? 179 00:09:01,035 --> 00:09:02,124 How high are you? 180 00:09:03,484 --> 00:09:05,943 So, that was my apology. 181 00:09:06,804 --> 00:09:08,005 Now it's time for yours. 182 00:09:08,995 --> 00:09:10,257 We're sorry you got hurt. 183 00:09:12,210 --> 00:09:13,719 So you do know this guy. 184 00:09:14,566 --> 00:09:15,855 Well, sorry 185 00:09:16,936 --> 00:09:18,047 means a lot. 186 00:09:18,788 --> 00:09:21,603 You know what also means a lot, partner? 187 00:09:22,477 --> 00:09:24,438 - Ten grand. - Ten grand? 188 00:09:24,606 --> 00:09:25,606 Today. 189 00:09:26,385 --> 00:09:28,317 Assault on a police officer is a felony. 190 00:09:28,485 --> 00:09:30,027 Minimum sentence: 8 years 191 00:09:30,195 --> 00:09:31,820 of daily ass rape. 192 00:09:31,988 --> 00:09:33,155 Assault? Really? 193 00:09:33,703 --> 00:09:35,866 I'll be back this afternoon for the money. 194 00:09:40,779 --> 00:09:42,157 This is some potent shit. 195 00:09:42,646 --> 00:09:44,208 I'm seeing Stormtroopers. 196 00:09:47,473 --> 00:09:49,191 It's Comic Con, you idiot. 197 00:09:55,058 --> 00:09:56,058 Leave it. 198 00:09:58,601 --> 00:10:01,697 I told you, I told you something would happen to Esteban. 199 00:10:02,186 --> 00:10:03,653 What, did he get shot? 200 00:10:03,778 --> 00:10:06,808 Beheaded? I heard they're doing that. They're chopping heads off. 201 00:10:07,112 --> 00:10:08,782 Are there photographs? 202 00:10:09,526 --> 00:10:10,920 Can I see them? 203 00:10:15,186 --> 00:10:17,100 - Where did you park? - Out front. 204 00:10:17,225 --> 00:10:18,374 We got to go. 205 00:10:19,115 --> 00:10:21,263 - What, to identify the body? - No. 206 00:10:21,544 --> 00:10:23,885 To Dr. Lyman's. I have to have this baby right now. 207 00:10:24,010 --> 00:10:25,499 What about Esteban's body? 208 00:10:28,125 --> 00:10:29,086 Esteban's fine. 209 00:10:29,254 --> 00:10:31,844 The call was bullshit to get you here. He's not dead. Nothing happened. 210 00:10:32,831 --> 00:10:35,467 - No beheading? - No beheading, no. 211 00:10:35,839 --> 00:10:37,886 You lied to me. I was all excited. 212 00:10:39,375 --> 00:10:41,216 They built a goddamn birthing room. 213 00:10:41,341 --> 00:10:43,360 They want me to have this baby totally off the grid. 214 00:10:43,485 --> 00:10:44,960 No birth certificate. 215 00:10:45,376 --> 00:10:47,429 If I disappear, if the baby disappears, nobody knows. 216 00:10:47,554 --> 00:10:48,897 It's fucking Rosemary's baby. 217 00:10:49,214 --> 00:10:51,406 No, I'm through bailing your ass out. 218 00:10:51,531 --> 00:10:53,675 You're no longer my responsibility. 219 00:10:53,971 --> 00:10:56,171 You're the responsability of the unbeheaded, 220 00:10:56,296 --> 00:10:59,616 corrupt, drug-dealing politician that you've chosen to marry. 221 00:10:59,951 --> 00:11:01,827 Andy, I'm not fucking around here. 222 00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:05,522 I'm trying to get over you and your drama. 223 00:11:05,647 --> 00:11:08,499 This could send me back weeks in the healing process. 224 00:11:08,624 --> 00:11:10,085 You cannot suck me back 225 00:11:10,253 --> 00:11:11,310 into your web. 226 00:11:11,435 --> 00:11:13,922 You're right, I can't suck you in... How about a handjob? 227 00:11:15,243 --> 00:11:16,466 Jesus, get off! 228 00:11:17,940 --> 00:11:20,345 I don't want your pregnant pity handjob. 229 00:11:20,651 --> 00:11:22,280 Christ, that's just sad. 230 00:11:24,503 --> 00:11:26,560 Fine, I'll take you. 231 00:11:27,169 --> 00:11:30,206 But this is it, the last time. I really mean it. 232 00:11:30,561 --> 00:11:32,339 Not like the last time I said I meant it. 233 00:11:32,464 --> 00:11:34,526 And raincheck on that for when you're not with child. 234 00:11:34,814 --> 00:11:37,388 Pull your car right at the gate and wait for me there. 235 00:11:40,646 --> 00:11:42,131 Were you really gonna jerk me off? 236 00:11:42,256 --> 00:11:44,703 That or squeeze your balls till you give me your car keys. 237 00:11:45,634 --> 00:11:46,848 I miss Yael. 238 00:11:51,397 --> 00:11:52,701 Before... 239 00:11:58,286 --> 00:11:59,471 And after. 240 00:12:01,388 --> 00:12:04,263 With the help of You're Pretty! cosmetics, 241 00:12:04,514 --> 00:12:06,308 I have just transformed 242 00:12:07,151 --> 00:12:08,852 this plain-faced little girl 243 00:12:09,166 --> 00:12:10,854 into a glamorous woman 244 00:12:11,022 --> 00:12:13,106 ready to meet the man of her dreams. 245 00:12:13,864 --> 00:12:14,816 I like girls. 246 00:12:15,417 --> 00:12:16,360 Play along. 247 00:12:17,269 --> 00:12:19,895 Don't forget, I'm giving a 10% discount 248 00:12:20,020 --> 00:12:22,574 to all of my colleagues from Surfside Mall. 249 00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:23,820 I got to hit it. 250 00:12:23,945 --> 00:12:26,328 If I'm even 10 min late, they put me on squeeze duty all day. 251 00:12:26,986 --> 00:12:28,872 No problem. Just tell me what you need. 252 00:12:29,040 --> 00:12:31,457 Lady, I got 4 kids, no husband. 253 00:12:31,582 --> 00:12:32,957 I make $8 an hour. 254 00:12:33,082 --> 00:12:34,752 If you think I got some extra cash 255 00:12:34,877 --> 00:12:36,963 for some overpriced eye-shadow, you're crazy. 256 00:12:37,545 --> 00:12:39,341 Then why are you here? 257 00:12:40,226 --> 00:12:42,135 You promised free samples. 258 00:12:43,145 --> 00:12:46,431 With purchase. You didn't read the fine print. 259 00:12:46,747 --> 00:12:49,017 - There's no fine print. - This is bullshit. 260 00:12:49,340 --> 00:12:51,269 - I want my free sample. - Me too. 261 00:12:51,437 --> 00:12:53,770 Well, doesn't anybody want to buy anything? 262 00:12:54,065 --> 00:12:55,577 Free sample! 263 00:12:59,945 --> 00:13:01,748 Okay, fine. 264 00:13:03,065 --> 00:13:05,125 You know what? Just kill me now. Kill me. 265 00:13:05,334 --> 00:13:06,830 Have a great fucking day. 266 00:13:06,955 --> 00:13:09,464 Rob me blind, grubby. Grubby grubber. 267 00:13:09,589 --> 00:13:10,542 You know what? 268 00:13:10,667 --> 00:13:13,458 Why don't you just stay blotchy and non-attractive, bitch! 269 00:13:14,008 --> 00:13:15,317 I hope you're happy! 270 00:13:15,442 --> 00:13:17,629 Huskaroo, Huskaroo 271 00:13:17,797 --> 00:13:19,147 You're beautiful 272 00:13:19,814 --> 00:13:21,633 In all the things you do 273 00:13:22,727 --> 00:13:24,052 You're not so bad yourself. 274 00:13:25,570 --> 00:13:26,720 I'm Isabelle. 275 00:13:27,056 --> 00:13:28,056 Danielle. 276 00:13:28,899 --> 00:13:29,871 And... 277 00:13:29,996 --> 00:13:32,436 I think you'd look better without all that crap on your face. 278 00:13:37,015 --> 00:13:39,223 There goes the dyke market. 279 00:13:52,460 --> 00:13:53,540 Are you joking? 280 00:13:54,020 --> 00:13:56,251 It's General Lee. From the The Dukes of Hazzard. 281 00:13:56,517 --> 00:13:59,171 I know. I was 12 years old once too. Why are you driving it? 282 00:13:59,619 --> 00:14:02,309 Bought it from some laid-off mortgage broker in Torrance. 283 00:14:02,434 --> 00:14:04,646 One of seventeen used on the show in season four. 284 00:14:04,771 --> 00:14:07,179 At least it damn well better be. I paid a shitload for it. 285 00:14:07,526 --> 00:14:08,513 Unlock, please. 286 00:14:08,902 --> 00:14:11,266 It's welded shut. You gotta come through the window. 287 00:14:12,388 --> 00:14:14,352 In that case a little help, please. 288 00:14:18,313 --> 00:14:19,562 Wait, wait, wait. 289 00:14:20,625 --> 00:14:21,625 Jesus. 290 00:14:25,087 --> 00:14:26,087 Christ! 291 00:14:29,092 --> 00:14:30,192 Here you go. 292 00:14:31,266 --> 00:14:33,331 - Get your hand off my boob! - Deal with it. 293 00:14:38,324 --> 00:14:41,133 It's nice to see you're putting uncle Yitzhak's money to good use. 294 00:14:41,953 --> 00:14:44,337 Just be glad I didn't get Fonzie's motorcycle. 295 00:14:44,462 --> 00:14:45,664 I was this close. 296 00:15:02,855 --> 00:15:03,777 I'm Tenly. 297 00:15:04,415 --> 00:15:05,737 You certainly are. 298 00:15:06,011 --> 00:15:07,322 Is the manager around? 299 00:15:07,745 --> 00:15:08,753 Doug Wilson. 300 00:15:08,878 --> 00:15:11,618 Top dog, big cheese, head honcho, grand puba. 301 00:15:12,829 --> 00:15:14,329 - What do you need? - A job. 302 00:15:14,497 --> 00:15:15,372 Hang on. 303 00:15:17,954 --> 00:15:18,875 You're fired. 304 00:15:19,043 --> 00:15:20,293 - I'm what? - Fired. 305 00:15:20,461 --> 00:15:21,714 - What'd I do? - Nothing. 306 00:15:21,839 --> 00:15:24,589 You see that chick over there? She needs a job, I need to get laid. 307 00:15:24,757 --> 00:15:26,383 You can't fire someone for no reason. 308 00:15:26,551 --> 00:15:27,926 I just gave you a reason. 309 00:15:28,313 --> 00:15:30,764 Look, if you need pussy, I can hook you up. 310 00:15:30,889 --> 00:15:34,099 My cousin broke up with her boyfriend and she's horny as shit. 311 00:15:34,504 --> 00:15:36,810 - She kinda look anything like you? - Kind of. 312 00:15:36,978 --> 00:15:38,144 Get out of here. 313 00:15:41,299 --> 00:15:42,315 He fired me. 314 00:15:42,483 --> 00:15:45,011 - What are you talking about? - It's bullshit! 315 00:15:46,744 --> 00:15:47,744 Hang on. 316 00:15:48,906 --> 00:15:50,767 - Can I talk to you a sec? - What? 317 00:15:51,257 --> 00:15:53,952 - You can't just fire people. - Why not? He looks like a terrorist. 318 00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:56,297 He can sue us for wrongful termination. 319 00:15:56,815 --> 00:15:59,107 Why are you being such a cockblocker? 320 00:15:59,232 --> 00:16:01,175 Fine, keep your swarthy little Jihadi. 321 00:16:01,300 --> 00:16:02,828 I want Tenly, it's my place too. 322 00:16:02,953 --> 00:16:04,980 We can't afford them both. We have a graft to pay. 323 00:16:05,105 --> 00:16:07,281 It's exactly why I fired the little Paki. 324 00:16:07,406 --> 00:16:09,509 Fuck you, man! I'm Tunisian. 325 00:16:09,677 --> 00:16:11,886 I have had it. I can't work with you anymore. 326 00:16:12,112 --> 00:16:13,638 So leave, I don't care. 327 00:16:14,632 --> 00:16:16,141 This partnership is over. 328 00:16:16,309 --> 00:16:18,114 That's right, it is. Finito. 329 00:16:18,239 --> 00:16:20,437 Don't go anywhere. We might have an opening. 330 00:16:21,049 --> 00:16:21,855 Asshole. 331 00:16:28,205 --> 00:16:30,309 - Thanks for doing this. - You're welcome. 332 00:16:30,823 --> 00:16:32,991 - I'll pay for gas. - Thank you. 333 00:16:33,592 --> 00:16:36,202 - It's the least I can do. - I'm not thanking you for the gas. 334 00:16:36,370 --> 00:16:37,928 What are you thanking me for? 335 00:16:38,053 --> 00:16:40,498 For showing me what I want out of my life. 336 00:16:40,805 --> 00:16:43,084 You have General Lee, what more could you ask for? 337 00:16:43,487 --> 00:16:44,487 Readiness. 338 00:16:44,666 --> 00:16:46,046 Ready to find the right woman, 339 00:16:46,214 --> 00:16:48,401 ready to settle down, sow my seed. 340 00:16:48,841 --> 00:16:51,176 Carry on my part of the Botwin legacy. 341 00:16:52,050 --> 00:16:54,679 You do have a cute butt, it would be a shame not to pass that on. 342 00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:58,683 Go on ahead with your snidy snideness, snide away. 343 00:16:58,851 --> 00:16:59,901 You'll see. 344 00:17:00,603 --> 00:17:03,104 I have just as much to offer a woman as Judah. 345 00:17:04,950 --> 00:17:06,399 And you're alive. 346 00:17:07,944 --> 00:17:09,611 And Judah crashed on that front. 347 00:17:09,779 --> 00:17:11,943 It might not be so obvious, but I'm a real catch. 348 00:17:12,068 --> 00:17:13,134 I'm kind, 349 00:17:13,597 --> 00:17:15,283 funny, total rockstar in bed... 350 00:17:15,451 --> 00:17:17,243 That does seem to be the consensus. 351 00:17:17,702 --> 00:17:20,708 The whole key is strong and focused work 352 00:17:20,950 --> 00:17:22,415 where the sidewalk ends. 353 00:17:22,719 --> 00:17:24,430 I know, Andy. I'm a girl. 354 00:17:26,199 --> 00:17:27,863 How's Esteban, in the sack? 355 00:17:28,222 --> 00:17:31,216 He seems like the selfish type. Throw you down on a table and fuck you. 356 00:17:32,071 --> 00:17:33,321 That works too. 357 00:17:33,970 --> 00:17:35,501 I knew that you liked it rough. 358 00:17:35,626 --> 00:17:37,794 You know, I'm precise, I'm connected. 359 00:17:37,919 --> 00:17:39,119 I'm an artist. 360 00:17:39,360 --> 00:17:41,290 You and me, we never would have worked. 361 00:17:41,741 --> 00:17:44,342 - I'm not rapey enough for you. - Consider yourself lucky. 362 00:17:44,467 --> 00:17:46,606 I'm fucking poison, you don't have to drink it anymore. 363 00:17:46,774 --> 00:17:48,001 Cheers to that. 364 00:17:48,943 --> 00:17:50,610 Still want my raincheck handjob. 365 00:17:56,791 --> 00:17:58,814 - Oh, God. - What? What's wrong? 366 00:17:59,543 --> 00:18:00,893 I still love you. 367 00:18:02,029 --> 00:18:03,532 No, I don't, I don't. 368 00:18:03,925 --> 00:18:06,209 It's just an obsession. I want what I can't have. 369 00:18:07,879 --> 00:18:08,931 I'm so fucked up. 370 00:18:09,056 --> 00:18:11,047 Jesus, you are poison. Fuck you! 371 00:18:15,912 --> 00:18:18,722 As I remember, this car went a hell of a lot faster on the show. 372 00:18:34,142 --> 00:18:35,517 What are you doing here? 373 00:18:35,642 --> 00:18:37,610 My mom told me to come here after school. 374 00:18:37,735 --> 00:18:39,566 Someone's trying to kill us. 375 00:18:39,691 --> 00:18:40,691 Again. 376 00:18:40,912 --> 00:18:42,908 Which leads to the question: why would she send me 377 00:18:43,033 --> 00:18:44,956 to the most obvious place I could be found? 378 00:18:45,708 --> 00:18:46,808 Don't worry. 379 00:18:47,292 --> 00:18:49,708 Your mother leads a charmed life. 380 00:18:49,833 --> 00:18:50,933 She's lucky. 381 00:18:51,442 --> 00:18:54,645 Everything always works out for Nancy. 382 00:18:55,246 --> 00:18:56,718 I, on the other hand, 383 00:18:56,886 --> 00:18:59,855 I'm jinxed, cursed, blighted. 384 00:19:01,369 --> 00:19:03,516 Nothing works out for me. 385 00:19:04,942 --> 00:19:06,572 What's in that case? 386 00:19:07,011 --> 00:19:09,219 A lot of false promises. 387 00:19:10,850 --> 00:19:12,859 God, I could use a foot massage. 388 00:19:14,190 --> 00:19:15,190 Here. 389 00:19:24,433 --> 00:19:25,288 Thank you. 390 00:19:27,046 --> 00:19:28,541 I fucking hate Mexicans. 391 00:19:28,709 --> 00:19:29,918 Never go into sales. 392 00:19:30,086 --> 00:19:32,128 - They're animals. - It's humiliating. 393 00:19:32,296 --> 00:19:35,590 - They have no regard for human life. - I'm Willy Loman. 394 00:19:35,758 --> 00:19:37,425 I think I'm gonna move back here. 395 00:19:37,617 --> 00:19:39,594 Dean was suppose to be Willy Loman. 396 00:19:39,762 --> 00:19:42,462 Can you tell my mom you'll take care of me? 397 00:19:46,888 --> 00:19:50,063 I've enough problems of my own without taking on Nancy's. 398 00:19:50,911 --> 00:19:52,774 Besides, why would you wanna be stuck with me? 399 00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:54,300 I'm a bitch. 400 00:19:54,807 --> 00:19:55,824 I drink. 401 00:19:56,240 --> 00:19:59,531 And I peddle useless shit that nobody wants. 402 00:19:59,907 --> 00:20:02,756 I don't want to be stuck with you, I can take care of myself. 403 00:20:02,881 --> 00:20:04,911 I just need you to tell her you'll watch out, 404 00:20:05,079 --> 00:20:06,663 so she'll leave me alone. 405 00:20:06,998 --> 00:20:08,915 You should peddle something that people want. 406 00:20:10,312 --> 00:20:12,585 - Like what? - Like drugs. 407 00:20:13,189 --> 00:20:14,685 That's fucking great. 408 00:20:15,619 --> 00:20:17,619 Now you tell me when it's too late. 409 00:20:17,744 --> 00:20:21,485 I just blew my whole wad on eye-shadow and zit concealer. 410 00:20:21,767 --> 00:20:22,789 Thank you. 411 00:20:23,385 --> 00:20:26,307 Go get me a drink. And then switch to the other foot. 412 00:20:38,876 --> 00:20:39,987 Nancy Botwin. 413 00:20:40,639 --> 00:20:42,446 It's been a while, hasn't it? 414 00:20:43,659 --> 00:20:45,404 From crescent to a full moon. 415 00:20:45,794 --> 00:20:47,453 Sorry, I've been seeing another doctor. 416 00:20:47,621 --> 00:20:50,178 I've been seeing other patients. It's all good. 417 00:20:50,504 --> 00:20:52,438 I'm Andy Botwin, not the father. 418 00:20:52,563 --> 00:20:54,544 Ex-brother-in-law, still close with the family. 419 00:20:54,878 --> 00:20:55,974 Love kids. 420 00:20:56,099 --> 00:20:57,248 Ready for my own. 421 00:20:57,373 --> 00:21:00,448 Isn't that the whole point of life? Children? Propagation? 422 00:21:00,730 --> 00:21:02,063 The cycle of life? 423 00:21:02,330 --> 00:21:03,511 I need to induce. 424 00:21:04,232 --> 00:21:07,165 - What did your doctor say about that? - I didn't ask him. 425 00:21:07,290 --> 00:21:10,018 But I need you to get the baby out of me as soon as possible. 426 00:21:10,365 --> 00:21:12,320 You're two days away from your due date. 427 00:21:12,445 --> 00:21:14,513 It's best to let your body call the shots here. 428 00:21:14,638 --> 00:21:15,776 I can't wait. 429 00:21:16,902 --> 00:21:18,943 Why don't we wait till you're past your due date 430 00:21:19,111 --> 00:21:21,781 - and I'll get your chart from the... - I can't wait. 431 00:21:21,906 --> 00:21:23,446 It's not because I'm uncomfortable. 432 00:21:23,571 --> 00:21:26,490 The father is a drug kingpin, slash mayor, 433 00:21:26,615 --> 00:21:28,491 slash radical home birth advocate 434 00:21:28,616 --> 00:21:30,705 who built a delivery room in their guest house. 435 00:21:30,873 --> 00:21:33,583 He spared no expense. He did this for two apparent reasons. 436 00:21:34,023 --> 00:21:35,619 One, to guarantee 437 00:21:35,744 --> 00:21:38,556 that his first and only son would arrive safely to the world. 438 00:21:38,681 --> 00:21:41,674 Two, to ensure they would be no witnesses 439 00:21:42,147 --> 00:21:43,927 or official records of said event, 440 00:21:44,666 --> 00:21:47,889 which could pose a problem if he ever decided to, say... 441 00:21:48,014 --> 00:21:51,581 kidnap the baby to Mexico and/or kill its mother 442 00:21:51,877 --> 00:21:53,387 the minute she gives birth. 443 00:21:53,512 --> 00:21:56,189 Thank you, Andy, for your discretion. 444 00:21:56,513 --> 00:21:57,523 Don't worry. 445 00:21:57,691 --> 00:21:59,859 Doctor/patient confidentiality. 446 00:22:00,027 --> 00:22:01,819 She can't testify, right? 447 00:22:01,987 --> 00:22:04,260 - Is that just lawyers? Shit. - Please. 448 00:22:04,926 --> 00:22:07,445 I need this baby to be born right now. 449 00:22:07,570 --> 00:22:10,272 I need witnesses. I need a US birth certificate. 450 00:22:10,397 --> 00:22:13,250 I need to do this before he realizes that I'm gone. 451 00:22:15,319 --> 00:22:16,623 I need help. 452 00:22:19,463 --> 00:22:21,220 I don't have health insurance but... 453 00:22:22,005 --> 00:22:23,294 I can pay cash. 454 00:22:24,006 --> 00:22:26,052 And if all goes well, there's a bonus in it for you. 455 00:22:30,335 --> 00:22:33,476 We need to get you into the hospital and get a Pitocin-drip going fast. 456 00:22:33,644 --> 00:22:36,122 Unless you want a C-section, it's faster but... 457 00:22:36,247 --> 00:22:37,417 Get it out! 458 00:22:38,024 --> 00:22:40,519 All right, I'll let the hospital know we're on our way. 459 00:22:44,045 --> 00:22:45,290 She's awesome. 460 00:22:47,097 --> 00:22:48,445 Please, I beg you. 461 00:22:49,660 --> 00:22:51,534 Wait until I've given birth. 462 00:23:05,794 --> 00:23:08,802 Damn! Now that's what I'm talking about. 463 00:23:10,754 --> 00:23:12,872 These Comic Con freaks like to party. 464 00:23:12,997 --> 00:23:15,778 I guess you kind of have to be baked to dress up like Skeletor 465 00:23:15,903 --> 00:23:18,741 and try to snap an upskirt picture of Lucy Lawless. 466 00:23:19,630 --> 00:23:21,275 So where is your partner? 467 00:23:21,571 --> 00:23:22,571 Who cares? 468 00:23:23,038 --> 00:23:25,695 Blitt and I can run this place all by ourselves. Right, Swarmer? 469 00:23:30,120 --> 00:23:32,268 - Hey, buddy. - Look at this place. 470 00:23:32,742 --> 00:23:34,006 Very impressive. 471 00:23:34,421 --> 00:23:36,039 Thanks for involving me, dickhead. 472 00:23:36,332 --> 00:23:39,013 Like when I involved you in my city council reelection campaign 473 00:23:39,138 --> 00:23:42,462 - and you forgot to send my paperwork? - One. One fuck-up. 474 00:23:42,630 --> 00:23:45,470 You're fucking jinx. Anything you touch turns to shit. 475 00:23:45,951 --> 00:23:49,122 - Nothing personal. - You're a douchebag. Nothing personal. 476 00:23:50,633 --> 00:23:52,500 Here's the man I came to meet. 477 00:23:58,427 --> 00:24:00,772 My client wishes to dissolve the partnership. 478 00:24:01,262 --> 00:24:03,816 We'll be filing articles of dissolution with the state and county. 479 00:24:04,128 --> 00:24:06,861 You are advised to give statutory notification to all creditors, 480 00:24:07,225 --> 00:24:08,821 settle all creditors' claims 481 00:24:08,989 --> 00:24:11,980 and then we can begin the distribution of all business assets. 482 00:24:13,491 --> 00:24:14,702 I'll take the weed. 483 00:24:15,163 --> 00:24:17,830 Fuck you. This club was my idea and you ruined it. 484 00:24:18,246 --> 00:24:20,458 - You're uptight. - And you're irresponsible. 485 00:24:21,299 --> 00:24:23,566 - You're really blowing all up? - I don't have a choice. 486 00:24:23,691 --> 00:24:26,456 I can't work with you. This is a professional establishment. 487 00:24:26,581 --> 00:24:28,841 Not some place for you to chase ass and get high. 488 00:24:29,634 --> 00:24:31,500 I can't have you blow this place up. 489 00:24:31,863 --> 00:24:33,537 I love this place too much, man. 490 00:24:34,222 --> 00:24:36,444 But you got to make a compromise too. 491 00:24:37,362 --> 00:24:39,435 I get a ball in the morning to get me through the day. 492 00:24:39,603 --> 00:24:42,188 And for the sake of our friendship and the success of our business, 493 00:24:42,676 --> 00:24:43,898 I'll bang Blitt's cousin. 494 00:24:46,852 --> 00:24:48,304 - Deal. - Deal. 495 00:24:49,863 --> 00:24:51,667 That's what I like to see. 496 00:24:52,067 --> 00:24:53,637 Bros before hos. 497 00:24:54,082 --> 00:24:55,576 And weed over greed. 498 00:24:55,948 --> 00:24:57,578 Or is it greed over weed? 499 00:24:59,176 --> 00:25:00,813 Get down! Everybody down! 500 00:25:01,709 --> 00:25:03,793 Come on, guys! It's just more Comic Con freaks. 501 00:25:04,228 --> 00:25:05,368 Don't fucking move. 502 00:25:05,493 --> 00:25:07,427 I'm getting my badge, I'm a cop. 503 00:25:07,552 --> 00:25:09,882 Get the fuck down on the floor now. You too. 504 00:25:10,050 --> 00:25:12,093 All right, I'll play along, whatever. 505 00:25:16,747 --> 00:25:18,724 How come he doesn't have to get down? 506 00:25:18,892 --> 00:25:21,352 Because I'm Frank Calderone. Internal affairs. 507 00:25:21,520 --> 00:25:22,937 Officer C.P. Jones. 508 00:25:23,481 --> 00:25:25,152 You have the right to remain silent. 509 00:25:25,277 --> 00:25:28,109 - Is this a joke? - No, it's no joke, fat-ass. 510 00:25:28,420 --> 00:25:32,447 Theft, extorsion, falsifying documents. And that's just for openers. 511 00:25:33,531 --> 00:25:35,004 You really are a cop. 512 00:25:36,090 --> 00:25:39,370 - Can I still bang your cousin? - You will never come near a Calderone. 513 00:25:40,114 --> 00:25:41,914 Dean Hodes, attorney of law. 514 00:25:44,262 --> 00:25:45,448 Fucking jinx. 515 00:25:49,521 --> 00:25:51,507 Excuse me, visiting hours are over. 516 00:25:54,469 --> 00:25:58,181 You have done a very bad and foolish thing coming here. 517 00:25:59,937 --> 00:26:01,642 You must leave right away. 518 00:26:04,092 --> 00:26:05,336 Get dressed. 519 00:26:34,900 --> 00:26:36,174 My God. 520 00:26:38,500 --> 00:26:40,522 You have no idea what you've done. 521 00:26:42,673 --> 00:26:43,844 He has your eyes.