1
00:00:52,761 --> 00:00:53,929
Oh, boy.
2
00:01:34,678 --> 00:01:37,264
Fuck!
Stop hitting me!
3
00:01:37,764 --> 00:01:39,891
This is like if Tyson fought an infant.
4
00:01:42,102 --> 00:01:44,813
I can't wait to punch you in the face
while you're sleeping tonight.
5
00:01:45,063 --> 00:01:48,400
- Get up! Get up!
- Saved by the bell.
6
00:01:49,526 --> 00:01:52,237
Come on, let me get in
a bong hit before round two.
7
00:01:53,572 --> 00:01:56,033
Oh! Look at that ass.
8
00:01:59,953 --> 00:02:03,915
Hey! Come on!
I spilled the bong! Stop!
9
00:02:06,418 --> 00:02:10,505
Boom! Knocked you out!
Eat it, whore!
10
00:02:12,549 --> 00:02:15,218
- You cheated, you dick.
- No, I didn't.
11
00:02:15,594 --> 00:02:18,180
Oh! The bong water reeks.
12
00:02:18,221 --> 00:02:21,224
Yeah, maybe if you cleaned it,
it wouldn't smell like your girlfriend's ass.
13
00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:28,607
What's going on, fellas?
14
00:02:28,649 --> 00:02:31,318
- What's up?
- How's it going?
15
00:02:31,777 --> 00:02:35,072
Who are you and why
are you in my kitchen?
16
00:02:35,113 --> 00:02:38,408
Your landlord, he hired us
to pick up your stuff.
17
00:02:39,242 --> 00:02:43,121
This is bullshit!
It's like Cypress Hill concert in here.
18
00:02:43,163 --> 00:02:45,248
I don't rent to
those kind of people.
19
00:02:45,332 --> 00:02:48,752
Yuri, what the hell's going on?
20
00:02:51,254 --> 00:02:53,215
- Alex, how are you?
- I'm good.
21
00:02:53,256 --> 00:02:57,260
Well, for last six months,
you no pay me rent.
22
00:02:57,302 --> 00:02:59,805
So now, I no longer
let you stay here. Okay?
23
00:02:59,846 --> 00:03:02,349
All right, my friends, pack up
everything, put on truck, okay?
24
00:03:02,391 --> 00:03:04,685
No, no. That's impossible.
We've never missed a payment.
25
00:03:04,726 --> 00:03:07,437
Every month, I give Josh
hundreds of dollars of my money
26
00:03:07,479 --> 00:03:10,232
and then he writes you
a rent check, right,Josh?
27
00:03:11,733 --> 00:03:13,985
I love them so much.
28
00:03:14,945 --> 00:03:16,321
You love who?
29
00:03:16,571 --> 00:03:19,700
The girls at Madame Kamay's
Filipino Palace.
30
00:03:20,909 --> 00:03:24,371
You've been spending our
rent money on Filipino hookers?
31
00:03:24,413 --> 00:03:28,083
They're not hookers.
They're massage therapists.
32
00:03:28,125 --> 00:03:30,127
They'll massage
your cock for money.
33
00:03:30,168 --> 00:03:32,003
There's a word for that.
I think it's hooker.
34
00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:33,338
You're a hooker!
35
00:03:33,922 --> 00:03:35,298
Whoa, wait.
36
00:03:35,590 --> 00:03:38,802
Listen, Alex, I make you
special deal, huh?
37
00:03:38,844 --> 00:03:42,514
I give you five minutes to pack up all
your shit you don't want thrown away.
38
00:03:42,556 --> 00:03:46,727
And if you take one extra minute,
I have my two friends...
39
00:03:46,852 --> 00:03:51,398
They take your testicles
and remove them through your anus.
40
00:03:52,983 --> 00:03:55,318
Deal?
Nice man.
41
00:03:55,569 --> 00:03:58,071
Okay, they got one minute
and then you... Okay?
42
00:03:59,364 --> 00:04:01,825
I'm sorry, Alex.
I should have told you.
43
00:04:01,867 --> 00:04:04,494
You can't whack it to Internet porn
like everyone else?
44
00:04:04,536 --> 00:04:06,329
You know I don't have a credit card.
45
00:04:07,789 --> 00:04:09,332
So where you going?
46
00:04:09,541 --> 00:04:12,961
I'll go to Dante's and see if he'll
let me stay there. What about you?
47
00:04:13,003 --> 00:04:16,131
Madame Kamay said
I could stay at the Palace.
48
00:04:16,590 --> 00:04:17,674
You're sick.
49
00:04:19,050 --> 00:04:20,051
I know.
50
00:04:20,886 --> 00:04:22,554
Where's the bong?
51
00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:25,682
Alex!
You forgot smoking lamp.
52
00:04:29,144 --> 00:04:32,731
I'm sorry.
Was that expensive piece?
53
00:04:34,065 --> 00:04:35,233
That's your fault too.
54
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:46,077
Yo, Dante, pick up.
Josh is killing me.
55
00:04:46,119 --> 00:04:49,456
Where are you?
I'm sick of talking to your machine.
56
00:04:49,498 --> 00:04:51,958
Why aren't you home?
I need you.
57
00:05:01,885 --> 00:05:03,094
Hey, Alex.
58
00:05:03,094 --> 00:05:06,014
Don't you answer your phone?
I've been calling for half an hour.
59
00:05:06,056 --> 00:05:09,267
Oh, I'm sorry.
I was putting up my Christmas tree.
60
00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:11,478
Dude, it's July.
61
00:05:11,728 --> 00:05:13,772
Get the fuck out of here.
It is?
62
00:05:13,814 --> 00:05:17,692
Yeah.
And why are you naked?
63
00:05:18,026 --> 00:05:22,072
Oh, my God.
I am naked! Come on in!
64
00:05:22,781 --> 00:05:25,826
Dude, your ass is
tanner than my face.
65
00:05:28,662 --> 00:05:30,997
That is pure fucking insanity.
66
00:05:31,039 --> 00:05:34,125
Yeah. I know.
He got addicted to hookers.
67
00:05:34,167 --> 00:05:36,878
No, I'm talking about
the guy who threw your bong.
68
00:05:36,920 --> 00:05:39,673
You should never
throw a bong, kid. Ever.
69
00:05:39,714 --> 00:05:45,470
Yeah, well, anyway, I was wondering
if maybe I could crash here for a while.
70
00:05:45,512 --> 00:05:49,015
Whoa. I don't know, man.
I got a business to run.
71
00:05:49,057 --> 00:05:51,184
This is like my office
as well as my home.
72
00:05:51,226 --> 00:05:53,770
Plus, the lion comes
in a couple of days.
73
00:05:54,396 --> 00:05:57,023
- You're getting a lion?
- Yeah.
74
00:05:57,023 --> 00:05:59,818
- Why?
- To protect my shit.
75
00:06:00,777 --> 00:06:02,445
Never heard of a dog?
76
00:06:02,487 --> 00:06:06,783
Dude, you can get past a dog.
Nobody fucks with a lion.
77
00:06:07,409 --> 00:06:09,077
Yeah, that's true.
78
00:06:09,703 --> 00:06:11,663
So what kind of weed
do you want?
79
00:06:11,705 --> 00:06:16,710
I got the "Incredible Hulk", I got some
of the "Green Monster", I got the "Bling".
80
00:06:16,751 --> 00:06:19,087
Hey! We go through this
every time I come here.
81
00:06:19,087 --> 00:06:21,798
I don't care what it's called.
I just want a bag of fucking weed.
82
00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:26,303
Whoa. Chill, bro. You know you can't
raise your voice like that when the lion's here.
83
00:06:26,845 --> 00:06:30,181
Yeah. You know what? I got to bail
or I'm going to miss my cousin's wedding.
84
00:06:30,223 --> 00:06:34,686
You look like a bag of shit. You sure you
don't wanna borrow my birthday suit?
85
00:06:34,728 --> 00:06:37,188
Thanks anyway,
but brown's not my color.
86
00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:40,025
This isn't brown.
I'm bronzed.
87
00:06:44,988 --> 00:06:47,991
So you can't kill the demon
at the end of Level 67?
88
00:06:48,033 --> 00:06:50,160
Do you have the magic arrows?
89
00:06:50,201 --> 00:06:53,705
Easy. Here's what you do.
Hide behind the boulder.
90
00:06:53,747 --> 00:06:57,959
When the demon comes out of the cave,
shoot him three times with the magic arrows.
91
00:06:58,001 --> 00:07:00,879
Then his head will start to spin.
Once that happens,
92
00:07:00,921 --> 00:07:04,132
you jump up on the boulder,
you do a flying downward thrust
93
00:07:04,174 --> 00:07:07,469
with the Sword of Doom
and that's it. Level 6 is done.
94
00:07:08,261 --> 00:07:11,139
Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you very much.
95
00:07:11,181 --> 00:07:13,892
Have I told you today
how much I love you?
96
00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:17,938
Hey, Grandma.
You look hot.
97
00:07:17,979 --> 00:07:20,440
Well, I haven't been out
and about for a while
98
00:07:20,482 --> 00:07:22,525
so I thought
I'd step it up a notch.
99
00:07:22,567 --> 00:07:24,110
- Well, it worked.
- Good.
100
00:07:24,152 --> 00:07:27,280
Oh listen, your father tells me
that you need a place to stay.
101
00:07:27,322 --> 00:07:28,323
Yeah.
102
00:07:28,365 --> 00:07:31,785
Just so you know,
Sophie left us two weeks ago.
103
00:07:31,826 --> 00:07:34,079
So her room is available
if you need it.
104
00:07:34,079 --> 00:07:35,789
Oh, where'd Sophie move to?
105
00:07:36,164 --> 00:07:37,165
Heaven.
106
00:07:37,624 --> 00:07:40,001
Sorry, Sophie was so...
107
00:07:40,043 --> 00:07:42,212
- Mean and full of hate.
- Yeah.
108
00:07:42,253 --> 00:07:44,214
So you want to move in tonight?
109
00:07:44,255 --> 00:07:47,550
You know what? That's a really
sweet offer but unfortunately,
110
00:07:47,592 --> 00:07:50,261
I promised my friend Jeff
I'd stay at his house.
111
00:08:08,947 --> 00:08:10,323
Come in. Hurry up.
112
00:08:11,032 --> 00:08:12,826
You sure this is okay?
113
00:08:12,867 --> 00:08:13,952
Yeah. It's totally cool.
114
00:08:13,994 --> 00:08:16,329
Just keep your voice down.
My roommates are sleeping.
115
00:08:16,663 --> 00:08:19,499
- You mean your parents?
- Yeah, same thing.
116
00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:21,710
Nice jammies.
117
00:08:21,918 --> 00:08:23,753
Thanks. They're a present
from my roommates.
118
00:08:23,795 --> 00:08:25,213
That's cool.
119
00:08:26,589 --> 00:08:28,049
Here we go.
120
00:08:38,643 --> 00:08:41,563
- Where am I supposed to sleep?
- On the air mattress.
121
00:08:41,604 --> 00:08:44,607
Do you need a stuffed animal?
I have a dog. I think I have a bear.
122
00:08:44,858 --> 00:08:46,276
Yeah, I have a bear.
123
00:08:47,193 --> 00:08:50,030
- What are you, eight?
- At least I have my own bed.
124
00:08:50,488 --> 00:08:55,452
- Your bed is a car.
- Yeah, but it's a fucking sweet car.
125
00:08:55,910 --> 00:08:58,371
My roommates said they are
gonna get me rims for Christmas.
126
00:08:58,413 --> 00:09:01,249
Or a C.B. radio.
I can talk to other car beds.
127
00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:02,417
That'll be hot.
128
00:09:03,626 --> 00:09:05,754
Might get a stereo too.
129
00:09:06,421 --> 00:09:08,423
My sister said I should get an alarm.
130
00:09:08,798 --> 00:09:09,799
Shut up!
131
00:09:44,667 --> 00:09:45,919
Gross.
132
00:09:53,468 --> 00:09:54,886
Oh, yeah.
133
00:09:55,887 --> 00:10:00,683
Come on, Laura. My cock is lost in the
jungle and it's up for you to find it.
134
00:10:01,184 --> 00:10:04,187
Oh, Laura, you dirty,
dirty adventurer.
135
00:10:04,646 --> 00:10:06,648
Come on.
Let's go exploring.
136
00:10:06,689 --> 00:10:08,733
Why don't you explore
my underwear, baby?
137
00:10:09,526 --> 00:10:13,363
Damn, you look good.
What's under the skirt, Laura?
138
00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:15,698
Oh, let's see.
Huh?
139
00:10:15,740 --> 00:10:20,995
Ooh, Laura, no panties?
How'd you know I liked it like that?
140
00:10:21,204 --> 00:10:25,500
Oh, yeah. Okay. Ooh, here we go.
All right. Here we go.
141
00:10:25,542 --> 00:10:27,669
Jeffrey?
What are you doing up so...
142
00:10:27,710 --> 00:10:29,671
Oh, my God!
I'm sorry!
143
00:10:29,712 --> 00:10:33,758
I can't stop coming!
I'm sorry! It feels so good!
144
00:10:40,515 --> 00:10:43,226
I can't believe
you came on my mom.
145
00:10:43,518 --> 00:10:45,937
You might be the biggest
perv in the world right now.
146
00:10:45,979 --> 00:10:49,065
- What were you thinking?
- I couldn't sleep. I saw the doll.
147
00:10:49,107 --> 00:10:51,651
So you can't wake me up
to play video games or something?
148
00:10:51,693 --> 00:10:56,197
Didn't want to disturb you. You were balls deep
in that turtle with a thumb in your mouth.
149
00:10:56,573 --> 00:10:58,283
I love my turtle.
150
00:10:58,324 --> 00:11:00,451
Anyway, my mom said
you could still stay the night.
151
00:11:00,493 --> 00:11:03,246
Oh, yeah, that's not
an awkward breakfast.
152
00:11:03,663 --> 00:11:06,583
Tell her thanks. I'm just going
to go crash at the office.
153
00:11:06,624 --> 00:11:09,627
All right, suit yourself.
I'll see you in a couple hours.
154
00:11:09,669 --> 00:11:10,670
Yeah.
155
00:11:11,421 --> 00:11:13,089
You can keep the doll,
by the way.
156
00:11:13,464 --> 00:11:15,717
Oh, I was planning on that.
157
00:11:16,009 --> 00:11:18,386
Oh! My doll is a whore.
158
00:11:57,050 --> 00:11:58,468
Um, excuse me?
159
00:12:07,602 --> 00:12:08,645
Hi.
160
00:12:08,686 --> 00:12:12,482
Good morning.
I'm just looking for my office.
161
00:12:12,815 --> 00:12:14,275
Are you the new janitor?
162
00:12:14,984 --> 00:12:17,737
No, I'm Samantha Garson.
163
00:12:17,987 --> 00:12:21,574
I'm here to oversee the final stages of
production on "Eternal Death Slayer 3".
164
00:12:21,824 --> 00:12:22,951
Oh, hi.
165
00:12:22,992 --> 00:12:26,704
I didn't know anyone new was coming in.
I'm Alex. I'm one of the testers.
166
00:12:28,081 --> 00:12:29,374
Do you usually sleep here?
167
00:12:29,958 --> 00:12:33,753
No. I was working late.
I love work. I love life.
168
00:12:34,671 --> 00:12:35,880
That's good to know.
169
00:12:36,506 --> 00:12:40,802
Yeah, um, your office is probably
the empty one down the hall.
170
00:12:41,135 --> 00:12:43,846
- Thank you. Alex, there's...
- Yeah?
171
00:12:46,182 --> 00:12:48,226
Brush your teeth.
I'll see you later.
172
00:12:49,394 --> 00:12:50,395
Thank you.
173
00:12:54,899 --> 00:12:56,025
Yeah.
174
00:12:58,820 --> 00:13:00,280
Johnny.
175
00:13:01,948 --> 00:13:03,866
Who the fuck is Johnny?
176
00:13:26,139 --> 00:13:28,850
What's up, Douche Bigalow?
How'd you sleep last night?
177
00:13:28,891 --> 00:13:31,394
Fine, Speed Racer.
What did you do, valet your bed?
178
00:13:31,436 --> 00:13:34,188
No, but I'll self-park it
in your asshole.
179
00:13:34,230 --> 00:13:37,859
- Come on. Let's go to lunch.
- Hey, you remember Laura, don't you?
180
00:13:38,234 --> 00:13:41,612
Yes, I do, and she already has a cold sore.
That's a surprise.
181
00:13:45,658 --> 00:13:48,828
Hey, word on the street is Mr. Cheezle
brought some girl here from New York
182
00:13:48,870 --> 00:13:51,164
to make sure we finish
"Eternal Death Slayer" on time.
183
00:13:51,205 --> 00:13:55,710
Yeah, her name's Samantha.
She's really hot. She wants to bang me.
184
00:13:56,002 --> 00:13:58,588
I'm sure she does.
Are you ready?
185
00:13:58,629 --> 00:13:59,922
Oh, please.
186
00:14:00,423 --> 00:14:03,259
Line up, you fucking nerds.
Who wants a shot at the champ?
187
00:14:04,469 --> 00:14:05,928
Who's going down?
188
00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:12,727
I'm taking the title, old man.
The game is "Frog Bog".
189
00:14:13,227 --> 00:14:14,645
Let's do it.
190
00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:35,041
Tea?
191
00:14:35,166 --> 00:14:36,167
Sure.
192
00:14:36,209 --> 00:14:39,087
It's a wonderful dandelion-nettle blend.
193
00:14:39,128 --> 00:14:42,507
Very cleansing.
Good for new beginnings.
194
00:14:48,596 --> 00:14:51,057
So, Samantha, as you know,
our immediate focus
195
00:14:51,099 --> 00:14:54,268
is the completion of "Eternal
Death Slayer 3" in time for the fall.
196
00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:58,815
We've had an enormous amount of bugs
at this stage, and, quite frankly,
197
00:14:59,065 --> 00:15:00,858
I'm a little more than concerned.
198
00:15:01,109 --> 00:15:04,404
"Knife Head IV" was in a similar situation,
but we met the deadline.
199
00:15:04,445 --> 00:15:07,907
"Jump Rope City" was a total nightmare,
and we figured it out.
200
00:15:08,282 --> 00:15:09,951
That's why I brought you in.
201
00:15:09,992 --> 00:15:11,994
To complete E.D.S. 3 on schedule,
202
00:15:12,036 --> 00:15:15,248
so we can free up all the testers
for J.P.'s new masterpiece.
203
00:15:15,289 --> 00:15:17,291
Two major titles in one year?
204
00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:20,294
And he's programming
and designing them all by himself?
205
00:15:20,336 --> 00:15:22,839
- He must be a genius.
- Well, J.P. is not normal.
206
00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:26,467
He created the original
"Eternal Death Slayer" when he was only 13.
207
00:15:26,509 --> 00:15:28,469
He's the definition of a prodigy.
208
00:15:40,356 --> 00:15:43,443
- J.P.!
- Sorry I'm late, Mr. Cheezle.
209
00:15:43,484 --> 00:15:46,612
I was in the middle of another huge
breakthrough with the new game.
210
00:15:46,863 --> 00:15:50,032
- How's it looking?
- It's the future of gaming.
211
00:15:50,158 --> 00:15:52,994
Breathtaking.
Care for tea?
212
00:15:53,035 --> 00:15:54,495
No, I'm good.
213
00:15:56,247 --> 00:15:58,374
I don't believe that we've met.
214
00:15:58,541 --> 00:16:00,042
Oh, this is Samantha Garson.
215
00:16:00,084 --> 00:16:04,088
I brought her in from New York to
be the project manager on E.D.S. 3.
216
00:16:04,505 --> 00:16:07,967
Hi. It's nice to finally meet you.
You have quite a reputation.
217
00:16:08,009 --> 00:16:10,303
Everything you've heard about me is true.
218
00:16:11,387 --> 00:16:16,058
So, if you ever need anything,
just please, feel free to call.
219
00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:18,561
- I'll give you all my numbers.
- Thanks, I will.
220
00:16:18,603 --> 00:16:20,354
Seriously, anything you need.
221
00:16:20,396 --> 00:16:23,733
Say, J.P., why don't you show Samantha
around the office, introduce her to everyone.
222
00:16:23,774 --> 00:16:27,695
Sure, yeah. I'll put my
genius on hold for a while.
223
00:16:28,404 --> 00:16:30,406
After you, my lady.
224
00:16:32,950 --> 00:16:34,494
Namaste, you guys.
225
00:16:36,037 --> 00:16:39,373
Did the kids in school hound you
for "Eternal Death Slayer" tips?
226
00:16:39,415 --> 00:16:42,668
School.
I didn't need school.
227
00:16:42,710 --> 00:16:46,672
All I ever cared about were video games,
and they've made me a millionaire.
228
00:16:46,714 --> 00:16:49,634
So maybe I don't know
what the Civil War was
229
00:16:49,675 --> 00:16:53,262
or who invented the helicopter,
even though I own one.
230
00:16:53,304 --> 00:16:56,432
But I did beat "The Legend of Zelda"
before I could walk.
231
00:16:56,724 --> 00:16:58,684
- That's cool.
- Yeah.
232
00:16:58,726 --> 00:17:02,730
I'm thinking of getting metal legs.
It's a risky operation, but it'll be worth it.
233
00:17:02,897 --> 00:17:06,234
- What's in here?
- It's just the kids in their break room.
234
00:17:06,275 --> 00:17:10,571
Or as I call it,
"The Stupid Idiot Room Full of Jerks."
235
00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:12,865
- Mine's the biggest office...
- Let's check it out.
236
00:17:17,495 --> 00:17:19,664
- Let's go!
- You suck! You suck!
237
00:17:25,086 --> 00:17:26,879
I thought you were
good at this, man.
238
00:17:30,508 --> 00:17:33,511
Oh, flies. I'm a frog.
I'm eating flies. A lot more than you.
239
00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:37,139
Come on!
Eat that frog dick, Timmy! Eat it!
240
00:17:37,181 --> 00:17:38,933
I'm sorry you had to see this.
241
00:17:39,016 --> 00:17:42,478
It's all these poor knaves have to
look forward to every day.
242
00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:46,357
Come on! Yeah!
Your shit's weak! Shit's weak!
243
00:17:48,526 --> 00:17:51,112
Whoa! Yeah! Yeah!
244
00:17:51,487 --> 00:17:54,365
Your shit's weak!
Wizzeak!
245
00:17:54,407 --> 00:17:55,950
You never had a chance, Timmy.
246
00:17:55,992 --> 00:17:58,536
I'll get you eventually, gray bush.
Time is on my side.
247
00:17:58,578 --> 00:18:00,621
Hey, at least I have a bush.
248
00:18:00,788 --> 00:18:02,248
Shit's weak!
249
00:18:02,290 --> 00:18:05,459
Oh, hey, Samantha.
Sorry you had to hear that.
250
00:18:05,501 --> 00:18:08,421
No, congratulations on having a bush.
251
00:18:08,462 --> 00:18:10,256
How do you two
know each other?
252
00:18:10,298 --> 00:18:14,135
I woke him up here this morning.
He fell asleep working late last night.
253
00:18:14,176 --> 00:18:17,513
Yeah, well, that's what old people do.
They fall asleep.
254
00:18:18,598 --> 00:18:21,142
Wow, J.P, that is a great outfit.
255
00:18:21,809 --> 00:18:23,894
How much do clothes
cost in the Matrix?
256
00:18:24,979 --> 00:18:27,189
So funny I forgot to laugh.
257
00:18:28,441 --> 00:18:30,901
Hi, I'm Jeff. I have a bush too.
It's not gray.
258
00:18:30,943 --> 00:18:32,653
- Hey!
- What?
259
00:18:32,695 --> 00:18:34,071
My bush isn't really gray.
260
00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:37,491
- Well, not according to my mom.
- I thought I told you to quit talking about that.
261
00:18:37,533 --> 00:18:39,493
People keep asking me about it.
262
00:18:39,535 --> 00:18:44,248
I'm really sorry to have to leave this
conversation, but I will see you guys later.
263
00:18:44,332 --> 00:18:46,375
Get back to work, testers.
264
00:18:46,542 --> 00:18:48,961
Hey, Samantha,
don't take the red pill!
265
00:18:56,552 --> 00:18:58,429
Adios, turd nuggets.
266
00:19:07,063 --> 00:19:08,064
Wow.
267
00:19:19,700 --> 00:19:22,828
Hey, Timmy, any chance I can
crash on your couch tonight?
268
00:19:23,204 --> 00:19:25,915
Why? So you can
jerk off on my mom?
269
00:19:26,123 --> 00:19:28,459
Jeff's a fucking liar, Timmy!
270
00:19:29,377 --> 00:19:30,586
What's that?
271
00:19:31,003 --> 00:19:34,548
How many people did you tell about
the incident with me and your mom?
272
00:19:35,675 --> 00:19:39,220
Thirteen, maybe. Why?
I didn't know it was a secret.
273
00:19:39,261 --> 00:19:42,056
No, you're right.
Your mom would really appreciate it.
274
00:19:43,557 --> 00:19:47,186
- My bad. Sorry.
- It's all right.
275
00:19:47,895 --> 00:19:49,772
So where are you
going to crash tonight?
276
00:19:50,815 --> 00:19:54,443
This really cute chick
I've known for a long time
277
00:19:54,485 --> 00:19:57,530
said that I could sleep over
with her and her two crazy girlfriends.
278
00:19:57,655 --> 00:19:59,490
- No way!
- Yep.
279
00:19:59,532 --> 00:20:00,950
Three chicks and you?
280
00:20:00,991 --> 00:20:03,327
Yeah, I'll call you later and let
you know which bed I end up in.
281
00:20:03,369 --> 00:20:06,205
Totally. Oh, my roommate's here.
Later, ‘gator.
282
00:20:06,247 --> 00:20:07,248
Later.
283
00:20:12,253 --> 00:20:14,255
- Hi, honey.
- Hi, Mommy.
284
00:20:14,296 --> 00:20:17,341
- Did you have a good day?
- I did. Did you remember to TiVo "Samurai Jack"?
285
00:20:17,383 --> 00:20:18,426
I did.
286
00:20:30,604 --> 00:20:34,233
Oh, honey, they work you
too hard there. That's a long day.
287
00:20:34,275 --> 00:20:37,069
It's not that tough of a job,
though, Grandma. But thank you.
288
00:20:37,945 --> 00:20:42,158
You are something else.
You must be starving, darling.
289
00:20:42,199 --> 00:20:43,534
Yeah, I could eat.
290
00:20:47,163 --> 00:20:49,749
That's quite the buffet
you have there.
291
00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:51,917
Thank you, Mr. President.
292
00:20:54,003 --> 00:20:59,592
Oh, Grace, you remember my
grandson Alex. Our new roommate.
293
00:21:02,094 --> 00:21:03,220
How long you staying?
294
00:21:04,847 --> 00:21:06,307
Just till I find a new apartment.
295
00:21:06,474 --> 00:21:08,768
- Do you have a girlfriend?
- No.
296
00:21:09,185 --> 00:21:12,730
- How old are you now?
- I'll be 36 in October.
297
00:21:13,355 --> 00:21:15,649
My grandson's gay too.
I'll give you his number.
298
00:21:15,691 --> 00:21:19,111
- I'm not gay, but thank you.
- Denial.
299
00:21:21,197 --> 00:21:24,658
Wow. That Grace sure makes
me feel warm and welcome.
300
00:21:24,700 --> 00:21:28,162
Well, you'd be bitter too
if you had four husbands die on you.
301
00:21:28,537 --> 00:21:30,080
Probably suicides.
302
00:21:31,499 --> 00:21:35,169
- I was just kidding.
- There we go. Here's your din-din.
303
00:21:36,879 --> 00:21:39,256
Oh, watch! It's hot.
Be careful!
304
00:21:39,298 --> 00:21:43,677
Okay, so that's chicken cutlet,
leftover lasagna, some scrambled eggs,
305
00:21:43,719 --> 00:21:48,849
some pudding and wait a minute.
A piece of the wedding cake.
306
00:21:49,850 --> 00:21:53,187
- That is awesome, Grandma. Thank you.
- You're welcome.
307
00:21:58,901 --> 00:22:01,070
Here's your new room, baby.
308
00:22:01,654 --> 00:22:04,698
- Wow, Grandma, this is nice.
- Oh, good.
309
00:22:07,034 --> 00:22:09,370
Hey, Sophie didn't
die in the bed, did she?
310
00:22:09,411 --> 00:22:11,121
- No.
- Good, good, good.
311
00:22:11,163 --> 00:22:14,208
No, she fell out of bed
and died right here.
312
00:22:14,834 --> 00:22:18,295
I am so happy
that you're here, honey.
313
00:22:20,589 --> 00:22:23,425
- Thank you so much, again.
- Sweet dreams, darling.
314
00:22:23,467 --> 00:22:25,010
- Thanks.
- Okay.
315
00:22:25,970 --> 00:22:28,556
- See you in the morning.
- You sure will.
316
00:22:52,288 --> 00:22:58,586
I died on the floor
and nobody helped me.
317
00:22:59,295 --> 00:23:02,756
You have got to be
fucking shitting me.
318
00:23:02,923 --> 00:23:08,304
Oh, it's so cold
when you're dead.
319
00:23:08,387 --> 00:23:10,222
I swear to God I would
have helped you, Sophie.
320
00:23:10,264 --> 00:23:12,933
Please don't kill me. I would have
helped you. I just wasn't here.
321
00:23:12,975 --> 00:23:15,144
- Gotcha!
- Oh, my God!
322
00:23:17,271 --> 00:23:20,733
- You scaredy-cat.
- What the hell are you doing, Grandma?
323
00:23:20,774 --> 00:23:22,985
Well, I told you we were
going to have fun.
324
00:23:23,485 --> 00:23:24,570
Yeah.
325
00:23:25,112 --> 00:23:28,741
Sweetie? Don't curse.
You're better than that.
326
00:23:28,949 --> 00:23:30,200
Okay.
327
00:23:31,827 --> 00:23:33,078
Fuck!
328
00:23:33,662 --> 00:23:35,706
That's fucking crazy.
329
00:23:41,879 --> 00:23:44,882
Oh my God.
What is happening?
330
00:23:46,342 --> 00:23:47,801
What the...
331
00:23:49,637 --> 00:23:53,057
What? Come on.
Stop that.
332
00:23:53,515 --> 00:23:55,517
Why are you doing this to me?
333
00:23:58,187 --> 00:24:00,356
Thank you. Thank you.
334
00:24:01,690 --> 00:24:04,109
Thank you. Thank you.
335
00:24:04,902 --> 00:24:06,946
Oh, rise and shine.
336
00:24:07,613 --> 00:24:10,115
Go take a tinkle and be sure
to wash your hands,
337
00:24:10,157 --> 00:24:13,077
- then come down and have breakfast.
- Okay, Grandma.
338
00:24:18,874 --> 00:24:23,337
Wow!
That was a great breakfast.
339
00:24:24,046 --> 00:24:26,548
Grandma, I'm going to go
back to sleep now.
340
00:24:26,590 --> 00:24:28,425
Oh, but don't you
have to go to work?
341
00:24:28,467 --> 00:24:31,303
Actually, I don't have to be at work
for another three and a half hours.
342
00:24:31,345 --> 00:24:34,348
Oh, that's wonderful that
you have all this extra time
343
00:24:34,390 --> 00:24:37,101
because we really could use
your help around the house.
344
00:24:37,267 --> 00:24:39,561
Oh, not a problem.
What do you need me to do?
345
00:24:39,603 --> 00:24:42,398
Just a few chores.
346
00:24:58,080 --> 00:24:59,331
Here you go, honey.
347
00:25:34,116 --> 00:25:36,577
All right, you guys, I'm gonna
need you to go all the way back
348
00:25:36,618 --> 00:25:39,455
and recheck,
starting with Level 1, okay?
349
00:25:39,913 --> 00:25:42,583
Kane, you are gonna
take 1 through 3.
350
00:25:43,625 --> 00:25:47,004
- Whatever you need, Samantha.
- Barry, you'll cover 4 through 6.
351
00:25:47,087 --> 00:25:49,798
Yeah, I can do that.
No problem. You're great.
352
00:25:50,382 --> 00:25:53,802
Jeff, you're already working on 7 through 9,
so why don't you just stick with those.
353
00:25:53,886 --> 00:25:55,137
Let's do it.
354
00:25:56,138 --> 00:25:58,057
The levels, I mean.
Not sex.
355
00:25:59,183 --> 00:26:00,267
Sorry.
356
00:26:01,143 --> 00:26:04,188
All right. Alex, I need you
to deal with 10 through 15
357
00:26:04,229 --> 00:26:07,024
because those are
the real problem levels and...
358
00:26:09,485 --> 00:26:10,694
Is he sleeping?
359
00:26:10,903 --> 00:26:12,988
Yes, and possibly
shitting his pants.
360
00:26:14,573 --> 00:26:17,284
- Wake up, dude.
- No chores, Grandma!
361
00:26:18,202 --> 00:26:19,870
Nice rip, Alex.
362
00:26:21,288 --> 00:26:22,498
Rip what?
363
00:26:23,290 --> 00:26:25,959
All right, you guys. Come on.
Get to work. It's crunch time.
364
00:26:26,001 --> 00:26:29,046
- Seriously, rip what?
- Why are you so tired?
365
00:26:29,088 --> 00:26:31,548
Uh, maybe 'cause I was
with three chicks last night.
366
00:26:31,590 --> 00:26:33,675
Something you'd know
nothing about.
367
00:26:34,051 --> 00:26:37,179
- Excuse you.
- Hey, look, it's Bono's brother.
368
00:26:38,347 --> 00:26:40,557
So how'd the loser conference go?
369
00:26:40,974 --> 00:26:43,936
Those losers are gonna make sure
your game releases on time.
370
00:26:43,977 --> 00:26:47,022
Oh, no, of course.
They're the best.
371
00:26:49,233 --> 00:26:52,152
I want to get you a black cobra.
372
00:26:52,277 --> 00:26:54,571
Just to go around the neck.
373
00:26:54,947 --> 00:26:58,408
J.P., I got to stay
on top of these guys.
374
00:27:01,036 --> 00:27:03,288
Please get on top of me.
375
00:27:13,507 --> 00:27:16,552
Here, honey, I made you
some Jell-O with no fruit
376
00:27:16,593 --> 00:27:18,428
‘cause I know how
much you hate it.
377
00:27:18,470 --> 00:27:21,640
And you got cheese and crackers
and some chocolate milk to wash it all down.
378
00:27:21,682 --> 00:27:25,102
- That's great. Thank you.
- Oooh, what's this?
379
00:27:26,186 --> 00:27:28,272
This is a video game I'm making.
380
00:27:28,355 --> 00:27:31,775
- It's kind of like a side project.
- Oh, good for you, honey.
381
00:27:32,067 --> 00:27:35,320
- Hey, you want to play it?
- Well, I don't know.
382
00:27:35,571 --> 00:27:36,697
Okay.
383
00:27:38,532 --> 00:27:40,617
You are so talented.
384
00:27:40,701 --> 00:27:44,413
I remember the birdhouse you
made way back at grade school.
385
00:27:44,538 --> 00:27:48,584
This is a little more violent than
the birdhouse. It's called "Demonik".
386
00:27:48,667 --> 00:27:52,796
You play a demon who's been summoned
from hell to clean out this meth lab.
387
00:27:52,921 --> 00:27:54,173
Space shuttle.
388
00:27:55,716 --> 00:27:58,385
So this helps you look around.
389
00:27:58,802 --> 00:28:02,764
This button is to punch.
This is to jump. This is to duck.
390
00:28:02,806 --> 00:28:05,601
This right trigger brings up
your magic spell menu.
391
00:28:05,684 --> 00:28:08,145
And the left trigger lets you
use your magic spells.
392
00:28:08,937 --> 00:28:10,480
How do you make him walk?
393
00:28:10,564 --> 00:28:12,733
- Oh, that's this stick right here.
- This here?
394
00:28:13,317 --> 00:28:15,235
Oh, there you go.
Oh, yeah, walk over here.
395
00:28:15,277 --> 00:28:19,406
Okay, go in this room. Okay, use your
telekinesis power to lift those objects.
396
00:28:19,489 --> 00:28:21,408
I don't see
a telephone anywhere.
397
00:28:21,450 --> 00:28:24,036
No, no. It's like a mind power.
Hit the red button.
398
00:28:24,077 --> 00:28:26,079
- Red.
- Oooh, perfect.
399
00:28:26,914 --> 00:28:29,708
Okay, you know what, use your
fireballs to blow a hole in that wall.
400
00:28:31,376 --> 00:28:33,712
Yeah, that's great.
Go in there. Go in there!
401
00:28:33,754 --> 00:28:35,839
Is this a good or a bad guy?
402
00:28:35,881 --> 00:28:37,925
That's a bad guy.
He's a drug dealer. Kill him.
403
00:28:37,966 --> 00:28:41,220
Oh, I hate violence.
But drugs are bad.
404
00:28:41,345 --> 00:28:44,973
- Wow!
- Ooh, nice Death Spike.
405
00:28:45,015 --> 00:28:47,768
Okay, now go in here and use your
lightning to blow up those barrels.
406
00:28:48,727 --> 00:28:51,730
Ooh! Oh, isn't that pretty?
407
00:28:51,855 --> 00:28:53,857
- Yeah.
- Oh, this is fun.
408
00:28:54,149 --> 00:28:56,109
Hey, wow, you got
to a checkpoint.
409
00:28:56,235 --> 00:28:58,528
- Is that good?
- Yeah.
410
00:29:01,156 --> 00:29:02,866
Well, so that's my game.
411
00:29:03,283 --> 00:29:06,745
And, you know what, I have a little more
work to do, so if you just want to...
412
00:29:06,745 --> 00:29:09,623
Wait your turn.
I'm on a roll here.
413
00:29:10,791 --> 00:29:13,335
Take that, you dirty dopers.
414
00:29:13,460 --> 00:29:17,881
Hey, you know what, Grandma? I actually
have to go see a friend and get some stuff.
415
00:29:17,923 --> 00:29:21,969
So you keep playing,
and I'll see you later.
416
00:29:22,970 --> 00:29:24,012
Love you.
417
00:29:38,819 --> 00:29:42,114
I can't believe there are people in
this world who still don't have cable.
418
00:29:45,492 --> 00:29:48,161
- Dr. Shakalu gets it.
- Yeah, he does.
419
00:29:48,245 --> 00:29:50,747
Anyways, here's a black box
that gets all the channels
420
00:29:50,789 --> 00:29:53,125
plus pay-per-view
and a bunch of extra wires.
421
00:29:53,250 --> 00:29:56,003
Just don't let a cop see it
or Grandma's doing some time.
422
00:29:56,503 --> 00:29:59,381
So how do you two
know each other?
423
00:29:59,423 --> 00:30:01,717
I met the doctor at
a cockfight in Pomona.
424
00:30:01,758 --> 00:30:04,177
He's hooking me up with
the lion. It comes tomorrow.
425
00:30:04,219 --> 00:30:05,178
Great.
426
00:30:05,220 --> 00:30:09,808
Plus, he brought over some crazy Zimbabwean
weed that'll turn you into a deer.
427
00:30:12,436 --> 00:30:15,147
You know that lions
eat deer, right?
428
00:30:15,772 --> 00:30:19,860
That's true, kid.
Doctor, we got to be careful.
429
00:30:21,862 --> 00:30:23,780
Oh, shit.
I've been here three hours?
430
00:30:23,864 --> 00:30:26,491
- I don't have antlers, do I?
- No. You're cool, bro.
431
00:30:27,117 --> 00:30:28,994
Thanks for all this.
And, Doctor?
432
00:30:31,538 --> 00:30:34,458
- Ooh, sorry.
- Anytime, kid.
433
00:30:54,436 --> 00:30:59,149
Oh, yes! Finally, a roommate
who goes shopping.
434
00:30:59,232 --> 00:31:01,193
Chicken cutlet.
435
00:31:01,943 --> 00:31:03,945
Spaghetti with garlic bread.
436
00:31:04,029 --> 00:31:06,490
Oh, my God, the wings
to go with the breast.
437
00:31:06,573 --> 00:31:09,785
I don't know what you are,
but I'm gonna fucking eat you too.
438
00:31:19,294 --> 00:31:22,631
Of course she doesn't have a microwave.
She's fucking 100.
439
00:31:46,780 --> 00:31:48,865
Yeah, Dante.
440
00:31:49,491 --> 00:31:51,493
Let's see, let's see.
441
00:31:54,287 --> 00:31:56,623
Good night, my friend.
Sleep well.
442
00:32:06,216 --> 00:32:07,676
Ooh, dinnertime.
443
00:32:07,801 --> 00:32:13,098
Oh, fucking bitch,
cock-sucking-fucker-ass-fuck!
444
00:32:13,181 --> 00:32:15,642
Oh! Goddamn it!
445
00:32:26,695 --> 00:32:28,989
Let me guess.
Was your dick on fire?
446
00:32:29,072 --> 00:32:30,991
- Yeah.
- Hey, Jeff.
447
00:32:31,074 --> 00:32:32,993
- Oh, hey, Alex.
- Hey.
448
00:32:33,076 --> 00:32:36,830
So, I finished my first level last night.
How far are you, Alex?
449
00:32:36,955 --> 00:32:39,583
Does it look like
I got any levels done last night?
450
00:32:39,666 --> 00:32:41,793
- Oh, my God.
- Geez. That's crazy.
451
00:32:41,835 --> 00:32:44,296
Wait, wait. Don't tell me your
roommates did that to you.
452
00:32:45,505 --> 00:32:47,716
Yeah. Yeah.
It was my roommates.
453
00:32:47,841 --> 00:32:51,178
They're crazy.
They're crazy. They tied me up.
454
00:32:51,219 --> 00:32:54,264
I was like one of those calves
at the rodeo, all helpless.
455
00:32:54,306 --> 00:32:58,435
And you know what? Just when I was
about to scream for the police, I came.
456
00:32:59,227 --> 00:33:00,979
- Oh my god!
- And that felt nice.
457
00:33:01,021 --> 00:33:03,231
That is nuts.
That is so hot.
458
00:33:03,315 --> 00:33:06,902
Hey, you guys. Kane, can you
take a look at that for me? Thanks.
459
00:33:07,486 --> 00:33:09,112
Whoa. Alex, what happened?
460
00:33:09,196 --> 00:33:12,365
There was a fire and I was
trying to save it from this baby...
461
00:33:12,407 --> 00:33:15,368
No, he's banging his three roommates.
They tied him up last night.
462
00:33:15,410 --> 00:33:17,287
They had crazy orgies,
like, all week.
463
00:33:17,329 --> 00:33:19,748
I don't know what they're talking about.
They're just joking.
464
00:33:19,789 --> 00:33:21,791
No, we're not.
You literally just told us that.
465
00:33:22,292 --> 00:33:25,337
Well, I don't think that's very smart
considering you work with your hands.
466
00:33:25,378 --> 00:33:26,463
Yeah.
467
00:33:26,505 --> 00:33:28,465
May I see you in my
office for a minute, please?
468
00:33:28,507 --> 00:33:29,633
Yeah.
469
00:33:31,009 --> 00:33:32,886
- Ooh!
- Busted!
470
00:33:32,928 --> 00:33:35,764
- You are so fired.
- You guys are assholes.
471
00:33:35,889 --> 00:33:36,932
Bye.
472
00:33:36,932 --> 00:33:38,850
Hey, you know what?
I forgot something.
473
00:33:38,892 --> 00:33:39,935
- What?
- This.
474
00:33:39,976 --> 00:33:43,104
Oh, my God! Fuck!
Are you serious?
475
00:33:43,563 --> 00:33:45,065
I think he fucking shattered it.
476
00:33:53,240 --> 00:33:57,577
All right. Look, Alex,
this game has to get finished.
477
00:33:57,702 --> 00:34:01,289
And you are the most experienced guy
I have here. I'm really counting on you.
478
00:34:01,414 --> 00:34:05,669
My hands being burnt will not
affect me finishing my levels at all.
479
00:34:06,044 --> 00:34:08,088
Well, I sure hope it doesn't.
480
00:34:08,755 --> 00:34:10,006
It won't.
481
00:34:13,051 --> 00:34:17,305
You know, you seem really out
of place in the video game world.
482
00:34:17,806 --> 00:34:19,349
Why? ‘Cause I'm a woman?
483
00:34:19,391 --> 00:34:23,478
No, 'cause you're a really hot woman
and you are swimming in a sea of virgins.
484
00:34:23,520 --> 00:34:27,691
Well, that is very flattering
and revealing, Alex.
485
00:34:28,108 --> 00:34:30,151
Look, I know you think
I'm really hot too
486
00:34:30,193 --> 00:34:32,612
and you want to go out with me
after work and get a drink.
487
00:34:32,654 --> 00:34:36,241
But I have this very serious
deadline that my boss gave me.
488
00:34:36,283 --> 00:34:39,703
So until I finish my levels,
I can't have any distractions.
489
00:34:40,412 --> 00:34:42,831
I guess I'll just have to suffer until then.
490
00:34:43,123 --> 00:34:44,124
Sorry.
491
00:34:44,416 --> 00:34:47,168
- Mr. Cheezle on line two.
- I have to take this.
492
00:34:47,377 --> 00:34:49,296
Avoid his tea parties.
493
00:34:50,755 --> 00:34:51,840
Hello.
494
00:34:58,138 --> 00:34:59,598
What are you doing, J.P.?
495
00:35:02,517 --> 00:35:04,436
Just thinking about my game.
496
00:35:05,604 --> 00:35:06,855
How's that going?
497
00:35:08,690 --> 00:35:10,942
People will bow to it.
498
00:35:13,612 --> 00:35:15,614
All right.
That's creepy.
499
00:35:18,450 --> 00:35:20,660
I hate your face.
500
00:35:27,208 --> 00:35:28,793
Did you say something?
501
00:35:33,965 --> 00:35:35,467
You're fucking weird.
502
00:35:41,973 --> 00:35:43,308
How can he see me?
503
00:35:45,935 --> 00:35:49,606
But before we can roast it, I want to
get the heat in the pan nice and high.
504
00:35:50,023 --> 00:35:52,525
And we're going to salt
and pepper the pork...
505
00:35:52,651 --> 00:35:56,196
Hello, ladies.
Enjoying the new cable?
506
00:35:56,529 --> 00:35:59,282
Some of the places do with string,
some of the places do with a net.
507
00:35:59,366 --> 00:36:01,368
You like that cooking channel,
huh, Grandma?
508
00:36:01,493 --> 00:36:06,623
And it's all food, all day.
That's all they do, is they make food.
509
00:36:06,873 --> 00:36:08,917
I want to eat the TV.
510
00:36:09,334 --> 00:36:12,629
Thanks a lot, Alex. Maybe tomorrow
you can introduce them to heroin.
511
00:36:13,963 --> 00:36:17,008
...with a label on it. It's very
rare to see a beer stein...
512
00:36:17,258 --> 00:36:19,344
- What's this?
- Antiques Roadshow.
513
00:36:19,594 --> 00:36:21,221
- What's that?
- Oh, it's great.
514
00:36:21,262 --> 00:36:24,349
People a take in crap and then
find out it's worth a lot of money.
515
00:36:24,974 --> 00:36:26,518
Move over, Bea.
516
00:36:29,521 --> 00:36:32,023
- I'm an antique.
- Yes, you are, Bea.
517
00:36:32,273 --> 00:36:35,443
King Gambrinus, who is
the patron saint of beer...
518
00:36:35,985 --> 00:36:39,072
So, ladies, I kind of need
to use the tele...
519
00:36:39,114 --> 00:36:41,741
Shhh! Go read your
"Playgirl" or something.
520
00:36:43,493 --> 00:36:47,288
- $4,000 for a beer mug?
- That's ridiculous.
521
00:36:47,330 --> 00:36:50,458
And we'll be right back as the
Antiques Roadshow marathon continues.
522
00:36:50,500 --> 00:36:52,836
Marathon? Fuck me.
523
00:36:57,090 --> 00:36:58,174
Come on.
524
00:37:00,135 --> 00:37:02,345
Hi. You're dead.
Bye-bye!
525
00:37:05,014 --> 00:37:06,141
What's up? J-dog.
526
00:37:06,182 --> 00:37:08,935
- Hey, J-dork, it's Alex.
- What's going on, shit lips?
527
00:37:09,018 --> 00:37:12,272
Not much. Look, I need
you to do me a huge favor.
528
00:37:12,355 --> 00:37:15,150
- You're not jerking off on my dad.
- Ha, ha. Very funny.
529
00:37:15,191 --> 00:37:18,987
No, I really need your help.
Do you think you can do some of my levels?
530
00:37:19,028 --> 00:37:21,072
What? No.
Why can't you do them?
531
00:37:21,114 --> 00:37:24,325
Look, my roommates won't let me
get any work done. They're insane.
532
00:37:24,367 --> 00:37:28,204
They won't stop watching porn.
533
00:37:28,246 --> 00:37:31,875
I can't get anything done.
They're total nymphos. You got to help me.
534
00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:33,710
You're dead to me. Over.
535
00:37:35,128 --> 00:37:36,588
Jeff's a good friend.
536
00:37:38,298 --> 00:37:41,092
This is not an ordinary Tiffany lamp.
537
00:37:41,426 --> 00:37:43,428
This one is a fish lamp.
538
00:37:43,470 --> 00:37:47,265
You can see that
there are fish swimming.
539
00:37:47,307 --> 00:37:48,725
The glass that these fish...
540
00:37:51,603 --> 00:37:53,730
It's 6:00 already?
541
00:37:54,939 --> 00:37:58,359
Okay, I'll make you some breakfast
before you do your chores.
542
00:37:58,568 --> 00:38:00,653
Oh, no, no, no, Grandma,
don't worry. No.
543
00:38:01,988 --> 00:38:05,283
I'm not that hungry, Grandma.
I was going to go into work early also.
544
00:38:05,325 --> 00:38:07,786
I don't have time
to do any chores today.
545
00:38:07,827 --> 00:38:10,121
Oh, it's just a couple
of things, sweetie.
546
00:38:10,163 --> 00:38:12,040
Do you know how to
use a sandblaster?
547
00:38:16,044 --> 00:38:17,796
Where did you get that?
548
00:38:18,129 --> 00:38:22,342
Oh, well, there was a break in the marathon
on TV, so I did some of your laundry.
549
00:38:22,383 --> 00:38:27,514
I found that vase in your bag and,
well, it smelled terrible, so I cleaned it.
550
00:38:27,722 --> 00:38:29,140
Doesn't it look nice?
551
00:38:30,767 --> 00:38:31,893
Thanks.
552
00:38:36,773 --> 00:38:41,528
Fruit cup? Nice.
Way to go, Mom.
553
00:38:43,446 --> 00:38:44,572
Challenge.
554
00:38:44,656 --> 00:38:48,284
Quiet, Bobby. Can't you see Alex is sleeping?
He's not taking challenges.
555
00:38:48,409 --> 00:38:51,371
No. I'm challenging you, Jeff.
556
00:38:51,830 --> 00:38:53,289
To what game?
557
00:38:53,540 --> 00:38:56,292
A little "Dance Dance Revolution".
558
00:38:57,502 --> 00:39:02,507
That's great, Bobby but we don't have
"Dance Dance Revolution", so you're dumb.
559
00:39:04,300 --> 00:39:08,847
- Ultramix 2!
- When the hell did we get this?
560
00:39:09,013 --> 00:39:10,598
It just came in this morning.
561
00:39:10,890 --> 00:39:13,935
Suddenly, you're not such a big
shit-talker anymore, are you, Jeff?
562
00:39:14,143 --> 00:39:16,813
Looks like my days are
numbered here at Brainasium.
563
00:39:17,355 --> 00:39:19,899
Well, can you at least go first
so I can see what I'm doing?
564
00:39:19,941 --> 00:39:22,944
Oh, with pleasure.
565
00:39:23,278 --> 00:39:25,446
Yeah, lose the Woody Allen jacket.
566
00:39:59,647 --> 00:40:02,233
Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
567
00:40:02,483 --> 00:40:05,653
Good stuff, Bobby.
Nice moves. That was hot.
568
00:40:06,571 --> 00:40:09,032
Well, let's see what we got here.
569
00:40:14,871 --> 00:40:17,624
Are you ready?
Dance!
570
00:40:30,678 --> 00:40:33,264
You're gonna break the game,
you're so good!
571
00:40:43,650 --> 00:40:47,862
Whoo! That game is fun!
Oh my God!
572
00:40:47,904 --> 00:40:51,032
- A new high score.
- What does "high score" mean?
573
00:40:51,115 --> 00:40:53,326
New high score.
Is that bad?
574
00:40:53,409 --> 00:40:56,245
What does that mean?
Did I break it?
575
00:41:34,325 --> 00:41:35,785
Hey, J.P.!
576
00:41:37,787 --> 00:41:39,330
Do you have a second?
577
00:41:41,249 --> 00:41:43,084
You didn't knock, Kane.
578
00:41:43,292 --> 00:41:47,005
I did. But I think that
the music was a little loud.
579
00:41:47,755 --> 00:41:49,215
Are you afraid of it?
580
00:41:49,716 --> 00:41:52,677
No, I just don't like techno.
581
00:41:53,261 --> 00:41:55,638
You would if you had robot ears.
582
00:41:56,639 --> 00:41:58,850
Yeah, I guess.
583
00:42:00,018 --> 00:42:03,438
Anyway, I had a suggestion
for "Eternal Death Slayer".
584
00:42:03,563 --> 00:42:05,648
- You know the dwarves and the...
- Three!
585
00:42:06,774 --> 00:42:07,775
What?
586
00:42:07,942 --> 00:42:10,403
"Eternal Death Slayer 3".
587
00:42:10,778 --> 00:42:12,655
Three, sorry.
588
00:42:12,947 --> 00:42:15,783
Anyway, don't you think
that the dwarves on Level 4
589
00:42:15,867 --> 00:42:18,953
look a little too similar
to the elves on Level 6?
590
00:42:19,287 --> 00:42:21,247
Might be a little too confusing.
591
00:42:21,330 --> 00:42:23,249
Well, that's an interesting theory, Kane.
592
00:42:23,291 --> 00:42:27,128
But redesigning all those characters
at this stage would be way too expensive.
593
00:42:27,211 --> 00:42:31,549
I agree. But what if you just
rendered them a different color?
594
00:42:31,841 --> 00:42:34,010
You know, that would be
cheap and quick.
595
00:42:35,511 --> 00:42:38,014
Leave the decisions to me, Kane.
596
00:42:38,056 --> 00:42:42,101
There's a reason why I'm the creator
of E.D.S. 3 and you're just a tester.
597
00:42:42,393 --> 00:42:43,561
I just...
598
00:42:45,730 --> 00:42:47,023
Eject.
599
00:42:59,869 --> 00:43:03,748
He had a good idea.
Shut up. Mind your own business.
600
00:43:13,883 --> 00:43:15,510
May I speak to you, my lady?
601
00:43:16,469 --> 00:43:17,845
Yeah, I guess.
602
00:43:18,096 --> 00:43:20,056
But could you please
knock next time?
603
00:43:20,139 --> 00:43:22,892
And what is it with
this "my lady" stuff?
604
00:43:23,017 --> 00:43:25,061
What are you, a knight
of the Round Table? Come on.
605
00:43:25,561 --> 00:43:26,646
Sorry.
606
00:43:27,772 --> 00:43:30,817
- What was that?
- Nothing, nothing.
607
00:43:31,150 --> 00:43:34,320
I just came to tell you that I
noticed the dwarves on Level 4
608
00:43:34,362 --> 00:43:37,698
and elves on Level 6
of E.D.S. 3 look way too similar.
609
00:43:38,032 --> 00:43:39,826
Could be confusing to some.
610
00:43:40,535 --> 00:43:43,704
Well, what do you want me to do?
I can't push the deadline any further.
611
00:43:43,913 --> 00:43:46,916
Well, you wouldn't have to if you
just rendered them different colors.
612
00:43:47,041 --> 00:43:49,752
Be cheap and wouldn't take
more a than a day or two.
613
00:43:50,336 --> 00:43:52,755
Yeah, we can definitely do that.
614
00:43:52,797 --> 00:43:55,925
That is a great idea.
615
00:43:56,509 --> 00:43:58,636
Those are the only kind I have.
616
00:44:00,972 --> 00:44:06,769
There's a symposium on nanotechnology tomorrow
at UCLA, 3:00 p.m., I thought maybe...
617
00:44:06,769 --> 00:44:08,479
- J.P.?
- Yeah?
618
00:44:08,521 --> 00:44:12,525
- I'm working.
- Right. I am too. I just...
619
00:44:13,067 --> 00:44:14,986
I just thought I'd let you know.
620
00:44:15,194 --> 00:44:18,990
I think that everybody should know.
You should probably make that a memo.
621
00:44:19,532 --> 00:44:22,910
- ASAP.
- ASAP. Gotcha.
622
00:44:34,964 --> 00:44:35,965
Hey, dude.
623
00:44:36,007 --> 00:44:38,759
What's up, guys?
What did weirdo say about the elves?
624
00:44:38,801 --> 00:44:41,721
- Shot it down.
- What? Really? That was a good idea.
625
00:44:41,846 --> 00:44:45,141
No, it wasn't.
I'm a piece of shit. I suck.
626
00:44:45,266 --> 00:44:47,476
Relax, Kane. You're not
a piece of shit.
627
00:44:47,518 --> 00:44:49,604
Just run it by Alex.
Maybe he'll talk to J.P.
628
00:44:53,900 --> 00:44:56,652
You'll have to wake him up
out of his sex coma first.
629
00:44:56,777 --> 00:45:01,199
He gives me a reason to live.
Him and all those stink-ass hos.
630
00:45:01,240 --> 00:45:04,118
Dude, he's living a fantasy.
It's so awesome.
631
00:45:04,160 --> 00:45:07,163
No! You guys,
it's not awesome, okay?
632
00:45:07,205 --> 00:45:09,832
Our report is due tomorrow
and he hasn't even started it.
633
00:45:09,957 --> 00:45:12,251
All right? If he doesn't finish it,
were totally f'ed.
634
00:45:15,546 --> 00:45:17,757
Crap. That's Alex's intercom.
635
00:45:22,261 --> 00:45:25,389
- Hello?
- Delivery at the front desk for you, Alex.
636
00:45:25,431 --> 00:45:28,809
- Cool! I hope it's a naked dude with a boner.
- What?
637
00:45:28,851 --> 00:45:30,895
Nothing.
Send it back.
638
00:45:32,521 --> 00:45:36,692
- Come on. Let's find Alex's desk.
- God bless us, every one.
639
00:45:36,734 --> 00:45:39,028
May I help you ladies?
Are you looking for Alex?
640
00:45:39,070 --> 00:45:43,366
Yes. I'm Alex's grandmother Lilly,
and these are his roommates.
641
00:45:43,449 --> 00:45:45,368
This is Grace and that's Bea.
642
00:45:47,787 --> 00:45:51,207
- Well, it's a pleasure to meet you ladies.
- Thank you.
643
00:45:51,290 --> 00:45:54,293
We thought it would be nice to
bring him a nice homemade lunch.
644
00:45:54,543 --> 00:45:58,214
Oh, that's very sweet. Well, I'm Samantha.
Come on. I'll show you where he works.
645
00:46:02,134 --> 00:46:03,552
You're dying.
646
00:46:06,097 --> 00:46:08,641
- Hey, Jeff.
- Hi.
647
00:46:08,724 --> 00:46:10,893
Is Alex around?
He has some visitors.
648
00:46:11,018 --> 00:46:14,021
Uh, no. No, he's not.
Hi, ladies.
649
00:46:14,063 --> 00:46:16,023
Did you go to high school with Alex?
650
00:46:20,736 --> 00:46:22,530
We're his roommates.
651
00:46:26,450 --> 00:46:29,704
You're the reason Alex
has been tired all week?
652
00:46:29,829 --> 00:46:34,709
We have been sort of rough on him but
he is kind of soft, if you know what I mean.
653
00:46:35,251 --> 00:46:40,089
We're not used to having a man in the
house so I guess we ride him pretty hard.
654
00:46:40,131 --> 00:46:43,467
- Oh, that is so gnarly.
- So where is he?
655
00:46:43,509 --> 00:46:45,011
Uh, I haven't seen him.
656
00:46:45,094 --> 00:46:48,139
He's definitely not under his desk sleeping.
That's a fact.
657
00:46:48,848 --> 00:46:52,184
Well, he's probably working hard somewhere.
658
00:46:52,226 --> 00:46:54,478
Could you please
just give him his lunch
659
00:46:54,520 --> 00:46:58,691
and tell him that I've had such fun
playing with his new toy all morning.
660
00:46:58,733 --> 00:47:01,652
And when he comes home later,
he can play with me.
661
00:47:01,694 --> 00:47:02,945
Oh my gosh!
662
00:47:02,987 --> 00:47:04,947
- I'm gonna barf.
- That is so repulsive.
663
00:47:04,989 --> 00:47:07,616
All right! That's enough.
I'm here.
664
00:47:07,658 --> 00:47:10,161
- Well, there you are.
- Hi, Grandma.
665
00:47:10,202 --> 00:47:11,454
We missed you.
666
00:47:11,495 --> 00:47:14,373
I was somewhere else,
working very hard on something.
667
00:47:14,415 --> 00:47:17,918
- Dude, what is going on?
- This is my grandmother.
668
00:47:17,960 --> 00:47:20,463
- Hello.
- These are her two roommates.
669
00:47:21,255 --> 00:47:23,341
I've been living with
them for the last week.
670
00:47:24,300 --> 00:47:25,968
Okay.
671
00:47:26,927 --> 00:47:28,721
- Hi, Grandma, ladies.
- Hi.
672
00:47:28,763 --> 00:47:31,223
Good to know.
Dude...
673
00:47:32,767 --> 00:47:35,269
Jerking off on my
mom is one thing
674
00:47:35,311 --> 00:47:37,897
but bangin' your grandmother
and her roommates?
675
00:47:37,938 --> 00:47:41,275
- That's like legendary.
- You're an idiot.
676
00:47:41,317 --> 00:47:43,903
Hey, you know what, ladies?
Why don't I...
677
00:47:43,944 --> 00:47:46,739
Come on. I'll walk you out.
No, we're gonna go this way, Bea.
678
00:47:47,990 --> 00:47:50,910
- Oh my gosh! - Holy crap.
- Dildo lunch?
679
00:47:51,118 --> 00:47:54,663
Sometimes they're marked
like this first one, which is by Llewellyn.
680
00:47:54,705 --> 00:47:59,335
Sometimes they're not. Sometimes they're
just great style, like this one.
681
00:48:00,169 --> 00:48:02,254
- Oh. Hi, sweetheart.
- Hey, Grandma.
682
00:48:03,881 --> 00:48:07,426
Hey, Bea. You know, you guys should
probably go to bed early.
683
00:48:07,468 --> 00:48:10,137
- You have a busy day tomorrow.
- What do you mean?
684
00:48:10,179 --> 00:48:12,139
- I don't have any plans.
- No.
685
00:48:12,181 --> 00:48:17,645
I just figured you wanna be well-rested
if you're gonna go to Antiques Roadshow.
686
00:48:18,104 --> 00:48:21,190
Oh! Alex, you're an angel.
687
00:48:21,232 --> 00:48:27,279
Oh, you can stay as long as you like
and love any man you choose.
688
00:48:27,321 --> 00:48:29,698
Pamela Mills here in Van Nuys,
689
00:48:29,824 --> 00:48:33,953
where a rare breed of African lion was
captured in a residential neighborhood.
690
00:48:34,036 --> 00:48:37,164
Sir, what was going through your head
when you came upon the lion?
691
00:48:37,206 --> 00:48:39,125
This shit is fuckin' crazy.
692
00:48:39,208 --> 00:48:42,044
I don't even know how a lion
got into the neighborhood.
693
00:48:42,169 --> 00:48:44,213
I heard some growlin' and shit
out in the yard.
694
00:48:44,338 --> 00:48:47,591
So my roommate and I,
we go to check the shit out.
695
00:48:47,716 --> 00:48:51,762
I look up in the tree, and there's
the fucking king of the jungle!
696
00:48:51,846 --> 00:48:54,348
You know, you ladies
should really get some sleep.
697
00:48:54,390 --> 00:48:55,683
Yes, that's right.
698
00:48:55,724 --> 00:48:59,228
We need our beauty sleep because we
have to get a lot of things appraised.
699
00:48:59,270 --> 00:49:01,188
Come on, Bea. Come on.
700
00:49:01,230 --> 00:49:05,192
It was starin'right at me.
I almost shit my fuckin' pants.
701
00:49:05,317 --> 00:49:07,319
So I ran inside
and called the 5-0.
702
00:49:07,570 --> 00:49:09,280
Good night, ladies.
703
00:49:12,032 --> 00:49:13,951
Time to get some levels done.
704
00:49:31,469 --> 00:49:33,304
Okay. All right.
705
00:49:33,345 --> 00:49:36,724
Maybe we can just divide up
the levels and just do them right now.
706
00:49:36,974 --> 00:49:39,643
There's no time.
We're screwed.
707
00:49:41,437 --> 00:49:43,230
Are we gonna get fired?
708
00:49:43,814 --> 00:49:45,941
I mean, you might.
We won't.
709
00:49:46,400 --> 00:49:48,068
Boy, I hope I do.
710
00:49:48,694 --> 00:49:51,489
I'm a worthless asshole
who deserves to die young.
711
00:49:54,158 --> 00:49:58,913
Easy, Kane. He'll be here.
You guys, relax. Have faith.
712
00:49:58,954 --> 00:50:01,499
Don't slit your wrists, Kane.
I'm here.
713
00:50:01,957 --> 00:50:04,668
Gentlemen, Levels 10
through 15, all done.
714
00:50:04,710 --> 00:50:07,171
- Oh, my God.
- I told you.
715
00:50:07,213 --> 00:50:10,216
All right! Who wants
a piece of the gray bush?
716
00:50:13,219 --> 00:50:14,970
Still think I should die.
717
00:50:26,190 --> 00:50:28,692
Thank you. Thank you.
718
00:50:30,236 --> 00:50:32,404
Hopefully, that'll keep away
the bad-energy troll.
719
00:50:33,781 --> 00:50:35,574
Samantha, what's the latest?
720
00:50:35,658 --> 00:50:40,037
Well, Mr. Cheezle, not only have
these guys found all the bugs
721
00:50:40,079 --> 00:50:43,874
but we have detailed instructions on
how to fix 'em. We're back on schedule.
722
00:50:43,916 --> 00:50:48,504
Phenomenal. Phenomenal.
Great energy. Great energy.
723
00:50:50,047 --> 00:50:56,011
I had a dream last night.
I dreamt I was a dove flying over the sea.
724
00:50:57,555 --> 00:51:00,349
And then I dove into the ocean
725
00:51:01,642 --> 00:51:03,686
and I swam with the dolphins.
726
00:51:05,938 --> 00:51:12,152
I was two animals joined as one
which meant good things are coming.
727
00:51:13,028 --> 00:51:14,071
Good things.
728
00:51:17,074 --> 00:51:20,369
Samantha, why don't you take the guys
out for dinner tonight, on Brainasium.
729
00:51:20,619 --> 00:51:22,371
Uh, sure.
730
00:51:22,496 --> 00:51:26,417
- Yeah, Samantha. Take us out.
- Yeah, let's fuckin' rage!
731
00:51:27,126 --> 00:51:28,127
Rage?
732
00:51:28,544 --> 00:51:32,298
You know, Mr. Cheezle, fly with the
seabirds or whatever you were talking about.
733
00:51:32,756 --> 00:51:37,011
Oh, okay. Fair enough. Yeah.
Rage it up. Rage all you want.
734
00:51:37,136 --> 00:51:39,847
Good things are coming.
Good things.
735
00:51:47,062 --> 00:51:49,690
- Hey, Samantha.
- Hey.
736
00:51:50,274 --> 00:51:53,152
Look, sorry I can't
make the dinner tonight.
737
00:51:53,193 --> 00:51:55,654
I just got the new
season of "Buffy" on DVD
738
00:51:55,696 --> 00:51:59,533
and I'm gonna kick it in my crib
and watch the bonus features.
739
00:51:59,658 --> 00:52:02,494
Wow. I didn't even know
that that came out.
740
00:52:02,494 --> 00:52:05,372
It hasn't yet.
I know people.
741
00:52:06,332 --> 00:52:09,918
Cool. Well, you have a
long night ahead of you.
742
00:52:09,960 --> 00:52:13,380
- If you want me to come, I totally will.
- It's all right, don't worry about it.
743
00:52:13,422 --> 00:52:16,091
Or if you wanna call me afterwards,
you totally can, probably.
744
00:52:16,133 --> 00:52:20,471
You know, actually, I'm really tired
so I'm probably not gonna stay out so late.
745
00:52:20,512 --> 00:52:22,348
But I will definitely see you on Monday.
746
00:52:22,389 --> 00:52:30,105
Listen, I realize that it must be really
intimidating to talk to me, you know.
747
00:52:30,147 --> 00:52:33,400
But underneath this genius...
748
00:52:34,443 --> 00:52:38,989
I'm simply a human, you know?
But I'm working on that.
749
00:52:39,823 --> 00:52:41,241
- J.P.?
- Yeah?
750
00:52:41,283 --> 00:52:42,951
- I have to go.
- Okay.
751
00:52:48,916 --> 00:52:50,376
Drive safe.
752
00:52:56,799 --> 00:52:59,176
I have chosen our very best
table for your party.
753
00:52:59,218 --> 00:53:00,094
Oh, thank you.
754
00:53:00,135 --> 00:53:02,096
You're welcome.
This is our harmony table.
755
00:53:02,971 --> 00:53:04,139
Thank you.
756
00:53:06,600 --> 00:53:09,186
Take a look, please,
at our very exclusive vitamin water list.
757
00:53:09,228 --> 00:53:12,439
- Oh, I'll look at that, yeah.
- Enjoy the harmony.
758
00:53:16,443 --> 00:53:18,696
This is where we get
to have our big dinner, huh?
759
00:53:18,737 --> 00:53:21,156
- Mr. Cheezle picked it.
- There's a shocker.
760
00:53:21,198 --> 00:53:25,744
- This menu sucks.
- The tofu cakes look kinda good, maybe?
761
00:53:25,786 --> 00:53:27,371
Do they even have alcohol?
762
00:53:27,413 --> 00:53:31,166
Actually, we don't serve alcohol.
Bummer, I know.
763
00:53:31,208 --> 00:53:34,920
But this must be your first time
here at Our Lady Health.
764
00:53:34,962 --> 00:53:38,424
I'm Shylo.
I'll be your waiter all day.
765
00:53:38,507 --> 00:53:41,135
I'm sorry. Did you say
your name was Shylo?
766
00:53:41,176 --> 00:53:43,303
- Yeah, Shylo.
- That's weird.
767
00:53:43,387 --> 00:53:45,222
- Jeff.
- What? It's weird.
768
00:53:45,264 --> 00:53:46,849
- He meant gay.
- Stop it.
769
00:53:46,890 --> 00:53:48,976
No alcohol?
This place sucks.
770
00:53:49,017 --> 00:53:50,978
Hey, fella.
Give it a chance.
771
00:53:51,019 --> 00:53:54,481
We do serve shots of wheatgrass.
772
00:53:54,690 --> 00:53:57,109
That's cool, if you wanna
be sober and vomit.
773
00:53:57,151 --> 00:54:00,696
Excuse me, sir. What do you
recommend for appetizers?
774
00:54:00,821 --> 00:54:04,825
You know what everyone's buzzing about
is the bean sprout quesadilla.
775
00:54:05,159 --> 00:54:07,578
You know what? There's a Tommy burger
right down the street.
776
00:54:07,619 --> 00:54:09,580
- Let's just do that, you guys.
- That sounds good.
777
00:54:09,621 --> 00:54:11,039
Look, guys. Come on.
778
00:54:11,081 --> 00:54:15,377
I know the food's a little different here
but it's actually good and good for you.
779
00:54:15,419 --> 00:54:17,796
We don't serve it
with any grease or fat.
780
00:54:17,880 --> 00:54:21,216
If we pay extra, could we
maybe get some grease or fat?
781
00:54:21,341 --> 00:54:24,178
Do you have bathrooms here
or do I have to shit in the plant?
782
00:54:27,222 --> 00:54:31,018
Stupid fucking idiot,
red-shirted ass.
783
00:54:31,059 --> 00:54:35,022
You guys think you're so fucking cool.
It makes me sick!
784
00:54:35,063 --> 00:54:39,485
"Let's go make fun of the vegans and their
crazy lifestyle." We're not hurting anyone.
785
00:54:40,277 --> 00:54:43,363
Go eat a hamburger
and choke on a cow dick.
786
00:54:43,697 --> 00:54:48,368
Aw, someone missed their yoga class
this morning. Come on. Let's go.
787
00:54:48,494 --> 00:54:53,373
- Nice karma, "Guy-blow."
- You said it wrong, stupid. It's Shylo.
788
00:54:56,585 --> 00:54:58,879
- We're really sorry, sir.
- You were sweet.
789
00:55:00,589 --> 00:55:01,757
Thank you, Lilly.
790
00:55:01,799 --> 00:55:05,761
I still can't believe they appraised
that footstool at $200, though.
791
00:55:05,803 --> 00:55:09,181
I know. Who would have thought
that was early Victorian?
792
00:55:09,473 --> 00:55:11,767
I wanted to win some money.
793
00:55:12,392 --> 00:55:16,355
I tried to tell you that was an old piece of
dried dog poop but you didn't wanna believe me.
794
00:55:16,396 --> 00:55:18,190
Poop-poop-pi-doop.
795
00:55:19,691 --> 00:55:22,861
Hey. This tea has
quite a kick. What is it?
796
00:55:22,986 --> 00:55:26,990
I'm not sure. I found this
in one of Sophie's old tins
797
00:55:27,074 --> 00:55:31,286
and I just thought it would be
nice to do it in her memory.
798
00:55:31,995 --> 00:55:33,497
Here's to you, Sophie.
799
00:55:44,716 --> 00:55:47,469
Come on, Kane. Call it!
I'm winning! I'm winning!
800
00:55:47,594 --> 00:55:50,389
- I'm winning! Please! Call it!
- Merry Christmas.
801
00:55:50,472 --> 00:55:54,518
- Please!
- I can't breathe! It's not a joke!
802
00:55:55,143 --> 00:55:59,231
There is absolutely no way that you
could ever beat me at any video game.
803
00:55:59,314 --> 00:56:01,233
- Oh, really?
- Yeah.
804
00:56:01,316 --> 00:56:04,069
You know, while other girls growing up
were playing with Barbies
805
00:56:04,111 --> 00:56:06,405
I was beatin' my brothers
at "Super Mario".
806
00:56:06,446 --> 00:56:08,991
Ooh, "Super Mario".
Nice name-drop.
807
00:56:10,784 --> 00:56:14,454
- How long have you been a tester?
- Like 10 years?
808
00:56:14,830 --> 00:56:17,791
- Wow.
- I used to be an accountant.
809
00:56:19,001 --> 00:56:21,253
Then I woke up one day
and realized I was miserable.
810
00:56:21,295 --> 00:56:23,839
So I walked into my boss's office
and I said, "Dad, I quit."
811
00:56:24,715 --> 00:56:26,592
"Dad."
Nice name-drop.
812
00:56:26,633 --> 00:56:29,303
At the end of the day, you have
to do what you're passionate about.
813
00:56:29,803 --> 00:56:30,929
Exactly.
814
00:56:31,096 --> 00:56:33,265
Plus, you can't get stoned
and be an accountant.
815
00:56:33,307 --> 00:56:36,351
Make too many mistakes, you lose
people millions of dollars, you get fired.
816
00:56:36,476 --> 00:56:37,811
It's like...
817
00:56:38,353 --> 00:56:41,398
Dude, can we go back to your grandma's
house? I have to use the bathroom.
818
00:56:41,440 --> 00:56:44,109
We are not goin' to my grandma's house.
Go pee in the alley.
819
00:56:44,484 --> 00:56:46,778
- I have to pee out of my ass.
- Oh, man.
820
00:56:46,904 --> 00:56:50,324
You know what? It's too late to go to your
grandma's house. I should get going anyway.
821
00:56:50,365 --> 00:56:53,535
No, no, no. It's not that late.
It's right around the corner. We can totally go.
822
00:56:53,785 --> 00:56:55,370
It's an emergency.
823
00:56:56,914 --> 00:57:00,417
Now, remember. They're probably sleeping,
so please be quiet.
824
00:57:03,545 --> 00:57:05,172
Think I hear voices.
825
00:57:05,589 --> 00:57:08,592
- Is that Spanish?
- Numero dos. Andale.
826
00:57:27,653 --> 00:57:28,904
Hey, Grandma.
827
00:57:28,946 --> 00:57:34,368
I don't understand
what these people are saying.
828
00:57:38,205 --> 00:57:40,082
Chi-Chi Zapata.
829
00:57:40,123 --> 00:57:43,001
Chi-Chi choochy loco-co.
830
00:57:44,711 --> 00:57:49,466
I didn't know you were bringin' people.
I would have trimmed my antlers.
831
00:57:57,975 --> 00:58:02,145
- Your grandma's hilarious.
- Yeah, she's not normally like this.
832
00:58:02,229 --> 00:58:04,356
Is that beer?
Can I have one?
833
00:58:04,398 --> 00:58:06,525
Here, you can have all of them.
Where's the bathroom?
834
00:58:06,566 --> 00:58:08,485
It's upstairs, to the left.
835
00:58:09,027 --> 00:58:10,988
Oh, I love that music.
836
00:58:13,156 --> 00:58:14,992
- Come here, cutie.
- Oh, hey.
837
00:58:16,201 --> 00:58:18,203
Ow, my face.
838
00:58:21,498 --> 00:58:23,125
Hey, Grandma?
839
00:58:23,250 --> 00:58:26,044
Do you think maybe I could talk
to you in the kitchen for a second?
840
00:58:26,086 --> 00:58:29,047
- Oh, sure, honey. I want a beer.
- Okay.
841
00:58:29,297 --> 00:58:31,383
Come on. Why don't we have
that beer in the kitchen?
842
00:58:31,425 --> 00:58:32,718
Okay, honey.
843
00:58:33,468 --> 00:58:34,636
Here's a pill.
844
00:58:37,389 --> 00:58:40,559
Grandma, why aren't you in bed?
845
00:58:44,938 --> 00:58:48,066
Oops. Oh, excuse me.
846
00:58:50,193 --> 00:58:53,697
Well, we were getting...
847
00:58:53,780 --> 00:58:59,202
We were getting ready for bed
and then we had a pot of Sophie's tea.
848
00:58:59,536 --> 00:59:03,623
- What tea?
- Sophie's tea, from the tin on her dresser.
849
00:59:03,749 --> 00:59:08,420
Oh, we thought it would be nice
to drink it in memory of Sophie.
850
00:59:09,880 --> 00:59:13,759
I can hear my hair growing.
851
00:59:15,677 --> 00:59:17,512
You want some soup?
852
00:59:18,972 --> 00:59:20,599
I'm okay, Grandma.
853
00:59:22,809 --> 00:59:26,980
- My grandma drank all my pot.
- That is great.
854
00:59:27,606 --> 00:59:31,359
I'm just saying it's cool. I mean, how many
people get to say that in their lifetime?
855
00:59:31,777 --> 00:59:33,945
- Do you have any more pot?
- No.
856
00:59:33,987 --> 00:59:36,364
I could definitely
smoke a joint right now.
857
00:59:36,406 --> 00:59:38,575
- Really?
- Yeah.
858
00:59:40,118 --> 00:59:43,455
- Call that weirdo Dante.
- Yeah, call him.
859
00:59:43,538 --> 00:59:46,124
Hey, easy, pothead.
I'll get you your fix.
860
00:59:46,625 --> 00:59:50,337
It's cool if I invited some of my friends
from the Crazy Beaver, right?
861
00:59:50,462 --> 00:59:54,549
Maybe next time you could go a little less
on the crazy and a little more on the beaver.
862
00:59:54,591 --> 00:59:57,803
There's no trouble, bro.
They're people, just like you and me.
863
00:59:57,886 --> 01:00:00,180
Now hit this joint
and have some fun.
864
01:00:01,014 --> 01:00:03,517
This isn't the
"I think I'm a deer" shit, is it?
865
01:00:03,558 --> 01:00:06,269
No, you're smokin' the Frankenstein.
866
01:00:06,853 --> 01:00:11,733
- Why is it Frankenstein?
- 'Cause after you smoke it, you walk like this.
867
01:00:13,360 --> 01:00:15,695
Need food.
868
01:00:22,035 --> 01:00:23,954
Look, I'm the Cookie Monster.
869
01:00:29,209 --> 01:00:30,627
What's up, homey?
870
01:00:32,129 --> 01:00:33,421
Peanut butter.
871
01:00:36,258 --> 01:00:38,218
I love Madame Kamay.
872
01:00:51,523 --> 01:00:54,192
Let's just say I learned a lot
about owning a lion.
873
01:00:54,234 --> 01:00:56,903
He learned better not own one.
874
01:00:56,945 --> 01:01:00,949
- Nice English words, Dr. Shakalu.
- Thank "boo".
875
01:01:02,367 --> 01:01:06,454
Hey, Dante. My girlfriend and I
caught you on the news yesterday.
876
01:01:06,496 --> 01:01:08,248
- Really?
- Yeah.
877
01:01:08,290 --> 01:01:12,210
By "girlfriend", do you mean that piece
of rabbit fur you rub on your dick every night?
878
01:01:15,130 --> 01:01:16,840
Yeah. Yeah.
879
01:01:16,882 --> 01:01:20,010
Hey, man. Lookin' back,
maybe that lion was a bad idea.
880
01:01:20,093 --> 01:01:22,637
That's why Dr. Shakalu's
hookin' me up with a monkey.
881
01:01:22,679 --> 01:01:24,514
I'm gonna teach it taekwondo.
882
01:01:28,894 --> 01:01:32,105
Yeah, a karate monkey.
You know, that's probably safer.
883
01:01:32,147 --> 01:01:34,065
Yeah. It makes sense.
884
01:01:34,149 --> 01:01:37,402
- Who wants some cereal?
- Yeah!
885
01:01:38,236 --> 01:01:40,071
Colonel Crackers is the best!
886
01:01:40,197 --> 01:01:44,159
Oh, I just wish he would hop off
the box and hang out with us.
887
01:01:44,284 --> 01:01:46,036
I think he's so cute.
888
01:01:47,537 --> 01:01:49,623
Guess I'm not high enough
to get that one.
889
01:01:50,790 --> 01:01:53,585
Guess what else you're not
gonna get, party pooper?
890
01:01:53,627 --> 01:01:55,462
The colonel. Here, honey.
891
01:01:56,671 --> 01:01:58,423
Sucks to be you, nerd.
892
01:02:01,218 --> 01:02:03,178
Hey, has anybody got a light?
I found some weed.
893
01:02:03,303 --> 01:02:05,472
- Oh, I do.
- I wanna smoke it.
894
01:02:05,639 --> 01:02:08,808
- It'll be fun.
- What is this?
895
01:02:10,060 --> 01:02:12,145
It's J.P.'s phone number.
896
01:02:12,187 --> 01:02:15,440
- Lucky you.
- You guys heard him talk like a robot?
897
01:02:15,482 --> 01:02:17,609
He's a fucking psycho.
898
01:02:17,651 --> 01:02:19,986
Hey, we gotta prank call him.
Let's prank call him.
899
01:02:20,028 --> 01:02:21,863
- No, no, no.
- Yes, yes, yes.
900
01:02:22,113 --> 01:02:24,074
Stupid polygon.
901
01:02:25,325 --> 01:02:27,035
Debug! I tried that.
902
01:02:28,245 --> 01:02:30,205
Graphic meter!
No, that's not it.
903
01:02:33,500 --> 01:02:36,044
Shit! This is not working.
904
01:02:36,294 --> 01:02:38,797
You'll never finish.
This game is falling apart.
905
01:02:38,838 --> 01:02:40,632
No, it's not.
Shut up.
906
01:02:40,757 --> 01:02:43,176
You're letting everyone down.
No, I'm not.
907
01:02:43,218 --> 01:02:47,430
I'm gonna make this game, and it's gonna be
the best thing that anyone has ever seen.
908
01:02:47,555 --> 01:02:50,016
Delusional thoughts
from "Fantasy Island".
909
01:02:50,058 --> 01:02:53,186
You'll never get metal legs.
Samantha is fucking Alex.
910
01:02:53,270 --> 01:02:54,688
No, she's not!
911
01:03:18,920 --> 01:03:20,046
Oh, my God.
912
01:03:20,171 --> 01:03:24,050
Hey, look how young
and cute you are.
913
01:03:24,092 --> 01:03:28,179
- Hey. Oh, my God.
- Baby want some milk?
914
01:03:29,222 --> 01:03:31,141
Baby loves milk.
915
01:03:32,058 --> 01:03:33,435
Oh, my God.
916
01:03:42,819 --> 01:03:45,196
Yeah, suck those jugs, kid!
917
01:03:48,992 --> 01:03:50,660
They're so good.
918
01:03:53,413 --> 01:03:55,248
- Oh, kick to the head.
- Yeah!
919
01:03:56,833 --> 01:03:59,210
- There we go. There we go.
- What is that little baby move?
920
01:03:59,252 --> 01:04:02,714
You want an ice cream sandwich?
They're on whole wheat with lettuce.
921
01:04:02,756 --> 01:04:06,259
Oh, no. That's okay. But you know what?
I think the bikers want some in the dining room.
922
01:04:06,301 --> 01:04:07,510
Okay, honey.
923
01:04:07,677 --> 01:04:10,472
Distract me with my grandmother.
Watch this.
924
01:04:10,513 --> 01:04:13,641
X, Y, X. Back-breaker!
Oh,you're dead! I killed you!
925
01:04:14,434 --> 01:04:17,771
So, I mean, what's it like being old?
It's gotta be weird, right?
926
01:04:18,063 --> 01:04:20,065
I mean, you saw
a lot of stuff go down:
927
01:04:20,106 --> 01:04:26,529
World War I, World War Il,
the automobile, Tupac. I mean...
928
01:04:26,946 --> 01:04:30,367
I once gave Charlie Chaplin a hand job.
929
01:04:30,867 --> 01:04:34,913
No way! Was he silent?
930
01:04:36,247 --> 01:04:38,708
Not after I was done with him.
931
01:04:39,751 --> 01:04:45,173
Oh, you're so cute.
You remind me of Charlie.
932
01:04:46,466 --> 01:04:48,343
You little tramp, you.
933
01:04:52,180 --> 01:04:56,017
Cabo Wabo shots.
You're up first, Samantha.
934
01:04:58,478 --> 01:05:01,731
I don't think so.
Tequila really messes me up.
935
01:05:01,773 --> 01:05:03,775
It's supposed to. Come on.
936
01:05:03,775 --> 01:05:07,612
Well, you know, if you don't do it, I'm gonna
do it and that's one more thing I beat you at.
937
01:05:07,654 --> 01:05:09,656
Oh, you asshole!
938
01:05:09,697 --> 01:05:12,450
All right. Pour me one.
You know what? Pour me two.
939
01:05:12,492 --> 01:05:15,412
I feel like Tom Cruise in "Cocktail".
940
01:05:16,413 --> 01:05:19,082
Hey, you don't really have to do two.
I was just kidding.
941
01:05:19,124 --> 01:05:21,543
What's the matter,
nana's boy? Can't hang?
942
01:05:26,381 --> 01:05:27,549
Wow.
943
01:05:27,590 --> 01:05:32,303
Someone ass getting laid tonight.
944
01:05:42,230 --> 01:05:44,899
Doctor, we're not
in the rain forest, man.
945
01:05:47,110 --> 01:05:50,405
My beef strong.
946
01:05:50,613 --> 01:05:52,699
Your beef wrong.
947
01:05:54,325 --> 01:05:56,911
And here I am
with Abbott and Costello.
948
01:05:56,953 --> 01:05:59,497
Wow. Which one did you nail?
949
01:06:00,457 --> 01:06:03,084
One? Try both.
950
01:06:04,419 --> 01:06:06,546
You were a dirty old whore.
951
01:06:07,505 --> 01:06:09,757
What do you mean, were?
952
01:06:14,137 --> 01:06:15,180
Yes.
953
01:06:32,405 --> 01:06:34,407
I wanna sing.
954
01:06:34,449 --> 01:06:36,784
What? You're too wasted to sing.
955
01:06:36,826 --> 01:06:40,413
Whatever. Like there's
such a thing as too wasted.
956
01:06:41,623 --> 01:06:42,707
Sorry.
957
01:07:45,103 --> 01:07:48,147
I fucking love this girl!
958
01:07:48,231 --> 01:07:50,984
Yo, Frankenstein!
959
01:08:15,883 --> 01:08:16,968
Oh.
960
01:08:20,680 --> 01:08:22,390
Oh.
961
01:08:23,266 --> 01:08:26,102
Did I hallucinate
a party last night?
962
01:08:26,477 --> 01:08:29,564
That is adorable.
Look at the little cowboy hat.
963
01:08:31,482 --> 01:08:32,817
Morning.
964
01:08:32,859 --> 01:08:35,570
Well, you must have been
off duty last night, Sheriff.
965
01:08:35,778 --> 01:08:39,866
Great, old pictures, 'cause you know, for a minute
I thought it might be something embarrassing.
966
01:08:41,034 --> 01:08:44,078
- What Halloween was that?
- No, that wasn't Halloween.
967
01:08:44,120 --> 01:08:48,082
- That was his first day at high school.
- Oh. Are those leopard spandex?
968
01:08:49,375 --> 01:08:51,753
Look. You can see his pee-pee.
969
01:08:51,878 --> 01:08:55,423
Okay, okay. The sheriff demands
that those pictures be burned.
970
01:08:55,840 --> 01:08:58,217
Oh, look here.
Look at this report card.
971
01:08:58,551 --> 01:09:02,055
Let's see. All A's.
Impressive.
972
01:09:02,138 --> 01:09:04,098
I'm a genius.
What can I say?
973
01:09:04,182 --> 01:09:06,142
Well, you were up till high school.
974
01:09:06,184 --> 01:09:09,854
Then all of a sudden, he got unfocused.
I guess it was just puberty.
975
01:09:10,104 --> 01:09:12,315
Yeah. It was definitely puberty.
976
01:09:12,815 --> 01:09:14,609
Oh, look at here.
977
01:09:14,692 --> 01:09:18,029
Here's Alex's grandfather
holding baby Alex.
978
01:09:19,697 --> 01:09:21,741
It was 10 years last month.
979
01:09:22,283 --> 01:09:23,785
I'm so sorry.
980
01:09:26,079 --> 01:09:31,084
That's why I like Alex to be in the house
because it makes me feel closer to him.
981
01:09:32,460 --> 01:09:34,545
He loved you so much.
982
01:09:34,754 --> 01:09:38,966
And I loved him, and I love you,
and I love being your roomie.
983
01:09:40,093 --> 01:09:41,928
You would have loved
my grandfather.
984
01:09:41,969 --> 01:09:44,847
He was the coolest. He would have had
a beer or two with us last night.
985
01:09:45,014 --> 01:09:46,599
He would have had 20.
986
01:09:46,933 --> 01:09:48,434
No, he had a problem.
987
01:09:48,476 --> 01:09:50,603
He would have definitely
fit in with that crowd then.
988
01:09:50,645 --> 01:09:54,941
We had such fun last night.
I've gotta get the name of that tea.
989
01:09:56,150 --> 01:09:58,069
Oh, my gosh.
It's already noon.
990
01:09:58,111 --> 01:10:00,988
I should probably get going.
Alex, could you give me a ride?
991
01:10:01,155 --> 01:10:03,574
- Oh, yeah. Totally.
- It was such a pleasure.
992
01:10:03,616 --> 01:10:06,494
- Thank you for showing me all the photos.
- Come any time, sweetheart.
993
01:10:06,577 --> 01:10:08,496
- I've got four more boxes.
- Okay.
994
01:10:08,579 --> 01:10:10,790
- Okay.
- Bye-bye.
995
01:10:13,960 --> 01:10:15,628
- See you later, Grandma.
- Okay.
996
01:10:21,718 --> 01:10:24,762
Hey Barry, I think it's time for you
and the milk maid to go home.
997
01:10:24,804 --> 01:10:25,930
Okay, Alex.
998
01:10:27,098 --> 01:10:28,641
Yeah. West West, yo.
999
01:10:37,275 --> 01:10:39,610
Grace, I have a confession to make.
1000
01:10:41,487 --> 01:10:45,283
You were my first.
1001
01:10:46,409 --> 01:10:47,618
Really?
1002
01:10:48,870 --> 01:10:50,663
Oh, that's sweet.
1003
01:10:52,957 --> 01:10:55,209
Let's see. You were my...
1004
01:10:56,878 --> 01:10:59,213
I don't know.
3,000 something.
1005
01:11:03,384 --> 01:11:04,469
Word up.
1006
01:11:14,020 --> 01:11:15,855
I should have worn a condom.
1007
01:11:20,234 --> 01:11:21,277
Nice place.
1008
01:11:21,652 --> 01:11:23,905
I've never met anyone
with 300 roommates.
1009
01:11:23,946 --> 01:11:27,492
Yeah, it gets messy, but
I've got 50 housekeepers, so...
1010
01:11:27,533 --> 01:11:28,785
That helps.
1011
01:11:29,660 --> 01:11:32,497
- This is my room.
- Here we are.
1012
01:11:32,872 --> 01:11:33,915
Yep.
1013
01:11:38,377 --> 01:11:39,879
Thanks.
1014
01:11:40,588 --> 01:11:44,342
So I will see you on Monday.
1015
01:11:44,884 --> 01:11:46,469
See you on Monday.
1016
01:11:48,429 --> 01:11:50,389
- Thanks for the ride.
- You're welcome.
1017
01:11:57,313 --> 01:11:59,315
Ah, shit.
I forgot my parking ticket.
1018
01:12:05,446 --> 01:12:06,823
Hey, I forgot my...
1019
01:12:13,120 --> 01:12:16,666
Wow. I just came back
to get my parking ticket.
1020
01:12:16,707 --> 01:12:21,045
- Yeah, I know. Here.
- What if I had been the bellboy?
1021
01:12:21,087 --> 01:12:23,172
I was kinda hopin' you were.
1022
01:12:26,676 --> 01:12:29,345
- I'll see you at work.
- I'll be there.
1023
01:12:30,054 --> 01:12:31,639
I'll be the older gentleman.
1024
01:12:35,393 --> 01:12:38,104
I am a genius.
1025
01:12:41,482 --> 01:12:46,863
Samantha, you will be mine, mine.
1026
01:12:49,866 --> 01:12:52,285
Must ingest more fuel.
1027
01:13:11,971 --> 01:13:13,848
When did I get a message?
1028
01:13:17,059 --> 01:13:19,353
You have one new message.
1029
01:13:19,645 --> 01:13:23,190
Hey, J.P., you fuckin' freak.
We're partyin'. Where are you at?
1030
01:13:23,232 --> 01:13:25,484
I'll chirp you later.
Here's Sam.
1031
01:13:25,902 --> 01:13:30,197
What do I... Hey, J.P.! We celebrated
the game tonight... Jeff, stop it.
1032
01:13:30,239 --> 01:13:32,199
Give me the phone.
My name is J.P.
1033
01:13:32,241 --> 01:13:35,202
I'm a robot. I like robots.
I have a robot vagina.
1034
01:13:36,537 --> 01:13:38,497
I am not amused.
1035
01:13:41,876 --> 01:13:45,922
Yes, that's correct.
She gave Charlie Chaplin a hand job.
1036
01:13:46,255 --> 01:13:49,175
Yeah. Next question.
Right here.
1037
01:13:49,258 --> 01:13:52,219
Do you think that she
invented the hand job?
1038
01:13:52,303 --> 01:13:54,221
Ooh. No, I don't.
1039
01:13:54,347 --> 01:13:58,184
But she did say she started
the finger in the ass during a blow job.
1040
01:13:58,267 --> 01:14:00,519
Yeah. She was a pioneer.
1041
01:14:00,603 --> 01:14:04,899
The big news from the party, ladies and
gentlemen, Barry sucked on his first booby.
1042
01:14:05,441 --> 01:14:07,068
For 13 hours.
1043
01:14:09,946 --> 01:14:12,198
Okay. That's enough.
Thank you.
1044
01:14:14,450 --> 01:14:17,912
Jeff, sounded like quite
a fun party Friday.
1045
01:14:18,037 --> 01:14:19,121
What do you mean?
1046
01:14:19,163 --> 01:14:22,124
I got the hilarious message
that you and Alex left.
1047
01:14:22,333 --> 01:14:25,086
Almost as hilarious as your face.
1048
01:14:25,336 --> 01:14:29,674
Look, we were just kidding, J.P.
Don't be mad at us.
1049
01:14:32,051 --> 01:14:33,302
So where's Alex?
1050
01:14:33,344 --> 01:14:36,097
What, did he take the day off
and die of old age?
1051
01:14:36,180 --> 01:14:38,849
- No, he went to lunch with Samantha.
- What?
1052
01:14:48,192 --> 01:14:51,320
So, who wants to hear about my
S.T.D. from the silent film era?
1053
01:14:51,362 --> 01:14:55,324
Yeah, hands up. This chick's pussy
smelled like the Great Depression.
1054
01:14:59,078 --> 01:15:01,205
Do you want any snacks, Alex?
1055
01:15:01,288 --> 01:15:03,416
Oh. No, thanks, Grandma.
I'm fine.
1056
01:15:08,879 --> 01:15:12,383
- Could you get that please, dear?
- Sure thing, Grandma.
1057
01:15:12,425 --> 01:15:16,345
- Maybe it's a fireman stripper, Alex.
- I can only hope, Grace.
1058
01:15:20,975 --> 01:15:24,895
- What the fuck are you doin' here?
- I need to speak with you, Alex.
1059
01:15:30,026 --> 01:15:34,155
It's just that the phone message
really bummed me out.
1060
01:15:34,572 --> 01:15:37,658
I can't help it that I'm different.
1061
01:15:37,700 --> 01:15:44,415
I just want you guys to like me
and you look at me like I'm a freak.
1062
01:15:48,044 --> 01:15:52,006
J.P., I gotta be honest.
The robot voice does not help your cause.
1063
01:15:52,089 --> 01:15:56,844
I know.
I do it when I get nervous.
1064
01:15:58,054 --> 01:16:00,598
Look, nobody hates you, okay?
1065
01:16:00,639 --> 01:16:04,018
I'm gonna talk to Jeff and the other guys
and we'll all go hang out one night.
1066
01:16:04,435 --> 01:16:07,563
- And Samantha?
- And Samantha.
1067
01:16:08,105 --> 01:16:12,568
Really? That'll be awesome.
Thanks, Alex.
1068
01:16:12,651 --> 01:16:15,780
Hey, everyone at Brainasium
totally respects you.
1069
01:16:15,821 --> 01:16:19,158
I mean, you created one of the greatest
games ever when you were just a kid.
1070
01:16:19,200 --> 01:16:21,077
You're a fuckin' legend, man.
1071
01:16:21,118 --> 01:16:24,789
I know.
I am pretty amazing.
1072
01:16:29,668 --> 01:16:33,339
- What's that?
- Oh, that's nothing.
1073
01:16:33,839 --> 01:16:35,508
It's... Well...
1074
01:16:35,883 --> 01:16:40,221
It's this game I've been
designing in my spare time
1075
01:16:40,262 --> 01:16:42,389
for the last couple of years.
1076
01:16:42,598 --> 01:16:45,476
Wow. This 3-D mapping is so smooth.
1077
01:16:45,601 --> 01:16:47,436
- Yeah.
- Did you design it by yourself?
1078
01:16:47,478 --> 01:16:50,189
- Yeah. Yeah.
- There's no clipping at all.
1079
01:16:50,231 --> 01:16:53,192
- Who did the programming?
- I did that too.
1080
01:16:54,902 --> 01:16:57,822
Hey, what can I say?
I'm a 35-year-old prodigy.
1081
01:16:57,863 --> 01:17:01,200
Thirty-five-prodi...
1082
01:17:01,283 --> 01:17:03,744
The collision detection's
excellent on this.
1083
01:17:03,786 --> 01:17:06,956
Hey, you know what?
I could take this home for you
1084
01:17:06,997 --> 01:17:09,708
and maybe give you
some notes on it or something.
1085
01:17:09,834 --> 01:17:14,588
You know, that's something a normal
person or a friend would do, right?
1086
01:17:14,630 --> 01:17:18,092
Yeah, actually.
That would be really cool.
1087
01:17:18,134 --> 01:17:20,886
The lighting effects
are really realistic.
1088
01:17:21,887 --> 01:17:23,722
Here. Just...
1089
01:17:24,181 --> 01:17:28,060
Do me a favor, all right?
Don't be too critical. I'm not a genius.
1090
01:17:28,978 --> 01:17:32,231
- I'm a genius.
- Yeah, I know you are.
1091
01:17:33,482 --> 01:17:36,819
And also, dude, I haven't told
any of the guys at work about this.
1092
01:17:36,861 --> 01:17:39,280
It's kind of a secret.
1093
01:17:39,321 --> 01:17:43,033
So just be careful with that
disk and don't tell anyone.
1094
01:17:43,159 --> 01:17:46,370
Oh, yeah.
Careful's my middle name.
1095
01:17:47,288 --> 01:17:49,456
Actually, it's not.
It's Philip.
1096
01:17:57,882 --> 01:18:00,676
- Doctor, hand me a Baggie, please?
- Here go.
1097
01:18:00,801 --> 01:18:02,011
Thanks, pal.
1098
01:18:02,970 --> 01:18:06,182
This guy's not gonna rip my heart out
of my chest and show it to me, is he?
1099
01:18:06,223 --> 01:18:08,893
No. This is Mr. Lee Ho.
1100
01:18:08,934 --> 01:18:11,020
He's teaching me and Monkey taekwondo.
1101
01:18:11,103 --> 01:18:15,482
I got my yellow belt today.
Monkey got his red belt. He's a quick learner.
1102
01:18:15,524 --> 01:18:18,944
Monkey sucker punch!
1103
01:18:19,028 --> 01:18:22,615
- That's how I got this fat lip.
- Where's the monkey now?
1104
01:18:22,656 --> 01:18:24,825
He's upstairs,
puttin' his nunchakus away.
1105
01:18:24,909 --> 01:18:27,369
Yo, that party was off the hook, kid.
1106
01:18:27,411 --> 01:18:30,164
Your girl can drink
her fuckin' face off.
1107
01:18:31,790 --> 01:18:34,585
Shut up, Monkey!
I got company, dude.
1108
01:18:36,712 --> 01:18:39,965
Doctor, can you tell Mr. Lee Ho
to go make the monkey be quiet?
1109
01:18:40,007 --> 01:18:41,008
Yes, sir.
1110
01:19:04,490 --> 01:19:09,912
- Lee Ho's the real deal. He's full-on Chinese.
- Yeah, I can see that.
1111
01:19:15,334 --> 01:19:16,585
What the fuck?
1112
01:19:17,836 --> 01:19:19,505
Mr. Lee Ho?
1113
01:19:23,884 --> 01:19:25,135
Monkey?
1114
01:19:32,226 --> 01:19:34,561
- Oh, shit!
- Monkey, please stop!
1115
01:19:35,729 --> 01:19:38,941
You have to cup your arm at the bottom
tightly and then release slowly like this.
1116
01:19:38,983 --> 01:19:40,109
Watch.
1117
01:19:42,653 --> 01:19:43,696
Try it.
1118
01:19:46,115 --> 01:19:47,866
Dude, I can't do it.
1119
01:19:47,908 --> 01:19:50,995
Just practice on the weekends
and stuff in your free time. You'll get it.
1120
01:19:56,041 --> 01:19:57,918
Don't tell me
your grandma beats you.
1121
01:19:58,085 --> 01:20:01,463
That's more believable
than what actually happened.
1122
01:20:01,922 --> 01:20:03,757
So, what's this
big meeting about?
1123
01:20:04,425 --> 01:20:06,176
I think it's about farting.
1124
01:20:10,723 --> 01:20:13,183
Gentlemen, Samantha...
1125
01:20:13,642 --> 01:20:17,354
Last night I received
a rough copy of J.P.'s new game
1126
01:20:17,396 --> 01:20:20,691
and let me just say that
it invaded my mind with such force,
1127
01:20:20,816 --> 01:20:24,695
I thought I was going to explode
into the atmosphere.
1128
01:20:24,820 --> 01:20:26,780
It really is amazing.
1129
01:20:27,281 --> 01:20:29,950
Yes. If you turn your
attention to the monitor,
1130
01:20:30,034 --> 01:20:32,119
I'll give you a glimpse
of the future.
1131
01:20:32,745 --> 01:20:35,289
Prepare your minds for "Demonik".
1132
01:20:35,706 --> 01:20:36,707
What?
1133
01:20:40,127 --> 01:20:42,212
- This is my game.
- Shh. I wanna watch.
1134
01:20:42,421 --> 01:20:47,551
Hey, no. No. Stop, please.
This is my game.
1135
01:20:48,635 --> 01:20:49,970
What are you saying, Alex?
1136
01:20:50,012 --> 01:20:52,389
I've been developing this
game for over three years.
1137
01:20:52,431 --> 01:20:55,768
What are you talkin' about?
I've been workin' on this game all year.
1138
01:20:55,809 --> 01:20:57,144
You know that, Mr. Cheezle.
1139
01:20:57,186 --> 01:20:58,437
Okay, that's bullshit.
1140
01:20:58,479 --> 01:21:01,940
Robo-Bitch came over to my house last night.
I showed him this game.
1141
01:21:01,982 --> 01:21:04,735
He said he was gonna give me
some notes on it, not fuckin' steal it.
1142
01:21:05,194 --> 01:21:06,779
Do you have another copy of the game?
1143
01:21:07,196 --> 01:21:08,238
No.
1144
01:21:08,280 --> 01:21:10,282
Oh, well.
That's convenient.
1145
01:21:10,532 --> 01:21:12,451
Why didn't you tell me
you were designing a game?
1146
01:21:12,868 --> 01:21:15,204
I don't know.
I was self-conscious about it.
1147
01:21:15,245 --> 01:21:18,582
Oh, how cute. He's just trying
to get into your pants.
1148
01:21:18,749 --> 01:21:22,753
Dude, I will come over there and kick your
robot head right off of that skinny fuckin' body.
1149
01:21:22,878 --> 01:21:26,298
Wait, Alex. You're really clouding
the energy in this room right now.
1150
01:21:26,340 --> 01:21:28,717
Is there any way that you can
prove that this is your game?
1151
01:21:28,759 --> 01:21:31,011
- Challenge him, dude.
- Yeah!
1152
01:21:31,053 --> 01:21:34,139
What's that gonna prove, Jeff?
He probably stole the game from me
1153
01:21:34,181 --> 01:21:36,433
copied it and learned
all the moves in one night.
1154
01:21:36,475 --> 01:21:39,186
- Mr. Cheezle, this is sad.
- Okay. That's it!
1155
01:21:39,228 --> 01:21:40,479
Whoa!
1156
01:21:41,939 --> 01:21:43,065
Wow, Alex.
1157
01:21:43,190 --> 01:21:47,736
Dude, you gotta cool down. And you come
back tomorrow and apologize to J.P. I'm sorry.
1158
01:21:47,778 --> 01:21:50,781
Apologize? I been bustin'
my ass on this game!
1159
01:21:50,823 --> 01:21:53,367
Okay. Now your energy
is really scarin' me.
1160
01:21:53,409 --> 01:21:55,661
You know what?
Fuck energy. Fuck J.P.!
1161
01:21:55,786 --> 01:21:58,622
Fuck Brainasium.
Fuck all of you. I quit.
1162
01:21:58,664 --> 01:21:59,873
Wait! Alex!
1163
01:21:59,915 --> 01:22:03,168
Let him go. Let him go.
Let him find his center and realign his chi.
1164
01:22:06,338 --> 01:22:08,215
That's right, Monkey.
Play my head.
1165
01:22:10,843 --> 01:22:13,262
I want you to take the "Frankenstein Shit",
1166
01:22:13,303 --> 01:22:16,640
the "Deer Shit", the "Green Monster",
the "Bling" and the "Bling-Bling"
1167
01:22:16,682 --> 01:22:19,017
and I want you to roll it all
into one joint.
1168
01:22:19,059 --> 01:22:21,603
No one's ever been
brave enough to try that.
1169
01:22:22,104 --> 01:22:24,148
One man is. Roll it.
1170
01:22:25,357 --> 01:22:29,695
I'll smoke it with you, bro. We'll go
to the loony bin together. I don't give a fuck.
1171
01:22:36,160 --> 01:22:39,037
Hey, Lilly. Is Alex here?
1172
01:22:39,079 --> 01:22:42,166
Hi, Samantha. No, honey.
He should be at work.
1173
01:22:42,207 --> 01:22:44,042
But why?
Is there something wrong?
1174
01:22:44,084 --> 01:22:48,255
No. He's not hurt or anything. There was an
argument at work over this video game, and...
1175
01:22:48,297 --> 01:22:51,758
- Alex's game, "Demonik"?
- Yeah. Do you know it?
1176
01:22:51,967 --> 01:22:54,261
Of course. I love it.
1177
01:22:54,303 --> 01:22:58,932
I'm almost at the final checking point
except I have to deal with those zombies.
1178
01:22:58,974 --> 01:23:00,851
They keep biting my neck.
1179
01:23:01,226 --> 01:23:03,395
- Hey, Lilly. Could you do me a favor?
- Sure.
1180
01:23:05,772 --> 01:23:10,736
I'm videotapin' this for scientific research.
This shit will be on the Discovery Channel.
1181
01:23:22,456 --> 01:23:23,999
Don't judge me, Monkey.
1182
01:23:29,254 --> 01:23:33,467
I just don't understand it. Why would
anybody do that, try to steal that from him?
1183
01:23:33,509 --> 01:23:34,968
I don't know, Lilly,
but he's not gonna...
1184
01:23:35,010 --> 01:23:37,763
Keep tryin', guys.
Backstreet for life. Oh, hey.
1185
01:23:37,804 --> 01:23:39,515
Hey, Jeff.
Can you find Alex?
1186
01:23:39,556 --> 01:23:42,434
I'm gonna take his grandmother to Cheezle's
office and get this mess figured out.
1187
01:23:42,434 --> 01:23:44,728
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not a problem. Totally.
- Thank you.
1188
01:23:45,312 --> 01:23:48,190
- Hello, Jeffrey.
- What's up, silver fox?
1189
01:23:48,398 --> 01:23:50,359
Why are you so sweaty?
1190
01:23:50,526 --> 01:23:52,653
Oh, I started a fight club.
1191
01:23:53,153 --> 01:23:54,821
Yeah. So, where's Alex?
1192
01:23:55,197 --> 01:23:57,282
We don't know.
Nobody can find him.
1193
01:23:58,700 --> 01:24:00,410
I know where he is.
Come on, babe.
1194
01:24:10,045 --> 01:24:11,463
You got skills.
1195
01:24:16,927 --> 01:24:18,262
What is that ringing?
1196
01:24:19,930 --> 01:24:21,306
Do I have a tumor?
1197
01:24:22,266 --> 01:24:24,351
Oh. Hello?
1198
01:24:24,643 --> 01:24:27,437
- Hey, Dante. Is Alex there?
- Hold on.
1199
01:24:27,646 --> 01:24:30,107
The Phone's for you.
I think it's the devil.
1200
01:24:34,111 --> 01:24:36,572
- Hello?
- Hey, Alex. You gotta come back to work.
1201
01:24:37,656 --> 01:24:40,117
I quit there fuckin' months ago, man.
1202
01:24:40,826 --> 01:24:43,537
- How baked are you right now?
- Who is this?
1203
01:24:46,957 --> 01:24:48,584
Is this Marv Albert?
1204
01:24:50,252 --> 01:24:54,172
God, you're torched. Okay, look.
There's an emergency.
1205
01:24:54,214 --> 01:24:56,800
J.P. revealed himself
to be an actual robot
1206
01:24:56,842 --> 01:24:59,678
and he kidnapped your grandma,
and he's gonna eat her soul out of her head.
1207
01:24:59,720 --> 01:25:02,556
My grandmother's in trouble?
I'll be right there.
1208
01:25:03,932 --> 01:25:05,142
He's on his way.
1209
01:25:05,183 --> 01:25:08,645
- How much time to we have?
- Enough time to 69.
1210
01:25:08,729 --> 01:25:12,774
- Oh. Just like Don Knotts.
- Oh. Hello, Mayberry.
1211
01:25:13,859 --> 01:25:15,527
You gotta give me a ride.
1212
01:25:16,194 --> 01:25:18,780
I'm way too baked to drive
to the devil's house.
1213
01:25:23,869 --> 01:25:26,330
Drive, Monkey! Drive!
1214
01:25:30,459 --> 01:25:32,294
I love what you did
with the bit-mapping.
1215
01:25:32,336 --> 01:25:37,257
Very stylish, very aggressive,
very, very Miyamoto.
1216
01:25:37,549 --> 01:25:40,385
Right. That's what I was going for.
1217
01:25:41,511 --> 01:25:44,181
- Excuse me, Mr. Cheezle?
- Yes, Samantha?
1218
01:25:44,389 --> 01:25:48,018
- I have proof that J.P. stole Alex's game.
- What proof?
1219
01:25:56,943 --> 01:25:59,529
I can't believe this stupidity!
1220
01:25:59,571 --> 01:26:02,199
You actually want me to play
a 90-year-old woman?
1221
01:26:02,240 --> 01:26:03,617
Ninety?
1222
01:26:04,660 --> 01:26:06,495
Grandma, what are you doin' here?
1223
01:26:06,536 --> 01:26:10,082
I'm tryin' to show these
people that you are not a liar.
1224
01:26:10,123 --> 01:26:12,542
Okay, let's go.
Let's start the game.
1225
01:26:12,584 --> 01:26:14,878
All your attention
on the monitors, everybody.
1226
01:26:17,798 --> 01:26:19,216
Here I come to get ya.
1227
01:26:20,842 --> 01:26:23,178
- Get him!
- There he is. Okay, okay.
1228
01:26:27,307 --> 01:26:28,350
Come on!
1229
01:26:31,978 --> 01:26:33,021
- Yes!
- Come on!
1230
01:26:33,897 --> 01:26:34,981
How about that?
1231
01:26:36,692 --> 01:26:39,152
Fireball! Fireball!
1232
01:26:39,277 --> 01:26:41,655
Take this Level 2 lightning.
1233
01:26:43,073 --> 01:26:44,991
That's not good.
Don't worry. You're fine.
1234
01:26:45,283 --> 01:26:46,868
Take a little bit of the plague.
1235
01:26:52,374 --> 01:26:53,667
Come on, Grandma. Get up.
1236
01:26:53,709 --> 01:26:56,169
- Come on Honey.
- Come on. Get up. Recover.
1237
01:26:56,211 --> 01:26:58,797
Hey, it's 4:00.
"Murder, She Wrote" is on.
1238
01:27:01,258 --> 01:27:03,176
- Jerk!
- Get him, Lilly. Get him!
1239
01:27:05,679 --> 01:27:07,723
Don't forget I'm a prodigy.
1240
01:27:18,567 --> 01:27:22,028
And don't forget
it's my grandson's game.
1241
01:27:22,154 --> 01:27:24,906
I will taste your flesh!
1242
01:27:38,378 --> 01:27:39,963
Yeah, Grandma!
1243
01:27:40,338 --> 01:27:43,717
- You guys, stop.
- That's right, Grandma.
1244
01:27:44,301 --> 01:27:46,303
I am so sorry
I didn't believe you, Alex.
1245
01:27:46,553 --> 01:27:48,138
You know, I had a dream last night.
1246
01:27:48,180 --> 01:27:54,019
I was a snake slithering through
the grass until I came upon a dead elk.
1247
01:27:55,228 --> 01:28:00,942
And I climbed into his soul.
And it's there I stayed until morning.
1248
01:28:00,984 --> 01:28:06,740
Which meant that I will
underestimate someone very close to me.
1249
01:28:06,948 --> 01:28:10,535
Wow! Where do you get your weed?
1250
01:28:11,536 --> 01:28:12,788
From you, Dante.
1251
01:28:13,455 --> 01:28:16,666
Oh, yeah!
What's up, Mr. Cheezle?
1252
01:28:17,834 --> 01:28:19,669
Okay, J.P., let's go.
1253
01:28:20,462 --> 01:28:22,380
We'll have your mom
come and pick you up.
1254
01:28:25,383 --> 01:28:27,177
Take care, J.P.!
1255
01:28:28,303 --> 01:28:30,472
Please sit on my face.
1256
01:28:32,015 --> 01:28:33,433
That was not appropriate.
1257
01:28:43,860 --> 01:28:45,779
To the release of "Demonik".
1258
01:28:45,821 --> 01:28:47,531
Cheers, thank you.
1259
01:28:49,199 --> 01:28:50,200
Kanpai.
1260
01:28:50,325 --> 01:28:51,952
Woo!
1261
01:28:52,077 --> 01:28:54,162
Hey, Dante. We're all toasting.
1262
01:28:54,204 --> 01:28:57,958
Hold up, yo. I've been savin' this
weed for a special occasion.
1263
01:28:57,958 --> 01:29:00,961
- What kind is this?
- This one's called the brown bomber
1264
01:29:01,002 --> 01:29:04,339
‘cause when you smoke it,
you get so stoned you shit your pants!
1265
01:29:06,341 --> 01:29:08,051
I'm not...
I don't wanna do that.
1266
01:29:08,510 --> 01:29:11,805
Yeah, I already shit my pants
this month, so I'm good.
1267
01:29:12,305 --> 01:29:13,640
Whatever.
1268
01:29:18,603 --> 01:29:20,146
What the fuck was that?
1269
01:29:20,188 --> 01:29:22,858
That's a present
Dr. Shakalu and I got for Alex.
1270
01:29:29,906 --> 01:29:31,992
Dude, a bag of weed
would have been fine.
1271
01:29:34,411 --> 01:29:37,372
Yeah, Monkey!
Karate chop the elephant!