1
00:00:05,286 --> 00:00:06,999
- So?
- No.
2
00:00:07,018 --> 00:00:10,367
No. You-You were in. I said, "Have
you met Ted" and everything.
3
00:00:10,380 --> 00:00:12,233
- How could that not work?
- I don't know,
4
00:00:12,239 --> 00:00:15,221
we introduced ourselves, I bought her
a drink, told her I loved her...
5
00:00:15,241 --> 00:00:17,069
- What?
- I'm kidding.
6
00:00:17,095 --> 00:00:21,628
Hold on, Roxanne-- you played
"Have You Met Ted" without me?
7
00:00:21,646 --> 00:00:24,053
In my bar with my Ted?
8
00:00:24,073 --> 00:00:28,640
Maybe stealing a bro's
wingman is okay back in...
9
00:00:28,665 --> 00:00:33,139
I'm sorry, what's the name of this third
world banana republic you claim to be from?
10
00:00:33,165 --> 00:00:34,804
Canada.
11
00:00:35,720 --> 00:00:38,394
I have literally never
heard of that place.
12
00:00:38,414 --> 00:00:40,636
- When'd you move here, anyway?
- Two months ago.
13
00:00:40,669 --> 00:00:43,676
- How do you like it?
- Honestly, it-it's been a little tough.
14
00:00:43,696 --> 00:00:46,696
I moved here for this on-air
reporter job at Metro News 1
15
00:00:46,714 --> 00:00:48,663
thinking it was gonna
be my big break,
16
00:00:48,678 --> 00:00:51,623
only to find out that our
viewership mostly consists
17
00:00:51,643 --> 00:00:54,610
of DMV waiting rooms and people plugging
in their TV for the first time.
18
00:00:55,605 --> 00:00:58,499
To top it all off,
I have no friends.
19
00:00:59,842 --> 00:01:01,860
Um... wrong.
20
00:01:01,886 --> 00:01:03,406
You have four
friends right here.
21
00:01:03,432 --> 00:01:05,076
- Right, guys?
- Uh, yeah.
22
00:01:05,082 --> 00:01:08,380
You're totally in our gang, now. And once
you're in, you're in for life, right?
23
00:01:08,393 --> 00:01:09,622
- She's in.
- All right.
24
00:01:09,654 --> 00:01:12,288
- Oh. - She's in.
- Welcome.
25
00:01:12,303 --> 00:01:13,875
Well, if I'm in, I should
get the next round.
26
00:01:13,894 --> 00:01:17,616
- Whoa, whoa, ho, ho.
- Ooh - I like this girl.
27
00:01:18,281 --> 00:01:20,741
I'm serious, I
like this girl.
28
00:01:20,761 --> 00:01:22,711
So here's the deal
with the deal.
29
00:01:22,733 --> 00:01:26,053
Robin's my new best
friend-- nobody bangs her.
30
00:01:26,072 --> 00:01:29,959
Hey, hey, hey, she only rejected me three
times, she's still very much in play.
31
00:01:29,985 --> 00:01:31,834
I'm serious.
32
00:01:31,862 --> 00:01:35,279
There's only one way I'd let
either of you have sex with her.
33
00:01:35,961 --> 00:01:38,562
Not that. It's never that.
34
00:01:39,112 --> 00:01:42,323
I really want this girl to
stay a part of our lives.
35
00:01:42,336 --> 00:01:45,838
So the only way you're allowed
to hook up with her...
36
00:01:45,860 --> 00:01:47,987
is if you marry her.
37
00:01:48,006 --> 00:01:49,974
Too rich for my blood.
38
00:01:52,355 --> 00:01:54,075
That son of a
bitch did it.
39
00:01:54,098 --> 00:01:56,458
He really did.
40
00:01:56,480 --> 00:01:58,913
So you're moving to
Chicago tomorrow, huh?
41
00:01:58,939 --> 00:02:00,326
How do you feel?
42
00:02:00,352 --> 00:02:02,315
Uh, I'm looking forward to it.
43
00:02:02,335 --> 00:02:05,962
The job's amazing. I got a
great apartment lined up.
44
00:02:05,975 --> 00:02:09,235
You know, it's...
It's exciting.
45
00:02:09,252 --> 00:02:11,110
Onwards and upwar...
46
00:02:21,756 --> 00:02:25,756
♪ How I Met Your Mother 9x23 ♪
Last Forever, Part 1
Original Air Date on March 31, 2014
47
00:02:25,757 --> 00:02:30,757
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
Resync for WEB-DL by Norther
48
00:02:36,126 --> 00:02:39,733
Hey! Bass player.
49
00:02:39,751 --> 00:02:43,568
It's me. The guy from the drug store
with the diapers that hit on you,
50
00:02:43,581 --> 00:02:47,572
then we went outside and had a deep,
emotional talk on a bus bench.
51
00:02:47,592 --> 00:02:51,453
Remember when you told me to stop
messing around and go get the girl?
52
00:02:51,473 --> 00:02:53,787
Well, check it. I got her.
53
00:02:55,648 --> 00:02:59,032
What about you? You
still dating that guy?
54
00:03:06,346 --> 00:03:08,399
Grape Scotch!
55
00:03:08,418 --> 00:03:11,423
Ted, Ted, Ted, Ted.
Right here, right here,
56
00:03:11,434 --> 00:03:13,108
- right here, right here.
- Yeah, I-I see you, Barney.
57
00:03:13,128 --> 00:03:15,511
Good, great. Then it's time to play a
little game I like to call Have...
58
00:03:15,536 --> 00:03:17,665
- Yeah, Barney, I...
- No, no.
59
00:03:17,678 --> 00:03:19,649
You are not getting out
of Have You Met Ted.
60
00:03:19,655 --> 00:03:21,014
There's a girl that
you have to meet.
61
00:03:21,039 --> 00:03:25,552
She is perfect for you. And has...
she met you? No, she has... not.
62
00:03:25,565 --> 00:03:28,618
- Think of all the sex you're
gonna ha... - Barney.
63
00:03:29,500 --> 00:03:31,813
I ha... I have to go.
64
00:03:31,835 --> 00:03:33,892
What, now?
65
00:03:35,991 --> 00:03:37,998
Yeah.
66
00:03:38,013 --> 00:03:40,056
Y...
67
00:03:40,076 --> 00:03:42,215
W-We have to do
this outside.
68
00:03:48,274 --> 00:03:49,891
Robin.
69
00:03:50,775 --> 00:03:52,748
It's been a
major pleasure.
70
00:03:52,781 --> 00:03:54,174
- Major Pleasure.
- Major Pleasure.
71
00:03:54,926 --> 00:03:56,802
Come here.
72
00:04:00,359 --> 00:04:03,274
- Congratulations.
- Thank you.
73
00:04:09,076 --> 00:04:11,969
Oh, God, no, this
is too real.
74
00:04:11,982 --> 00:04:14,705
I can't handle this,
Marshall's next.
75
00:04:15,524 --> 00:04:17,421
Marshall.
76
00:04:19,585 --> 00:04:22,158
Good luck out
there in Chicago.
77
00:04:22,184 --> 00:04:24,363
I'm gonna be kind of jealous
of you, getting to have
78
00:04:24,382 --> 00:04:26,483
Gazzola's pizza
whenever you want.
79
00:04:26,510 --> 00:04:30,786
- You're gonna be in Rome.
- Yeah. I guess.
80
00:04:36,892 --> 00:04:41,742
I just... I feel like
a hug isn't enough.
81
00:04:41,764 --> 00:04:43,951
E.T. good-bye?
82
00:04:47,357 --> 00:04:51,046
I'll be right...
83
00:04:51,073 --> 00:04:53,806
here.
84
00:04:53,832 --> 00:04:55,834
Okay, it helped, but
that was really creepy.
85
00:04:55,846 --> 00:04:58,521
I don't want to see
you for awhile.
86
00:05:00,152 --> 00:05:02,053
Barney.
87
00:05:03,292 --> 00:05:04,964
Mm.
88
00:05:07,480 --> 00:05:09,407
We licked the Liberty Bell.
89
00:05:09,420 --> 00:05:11,180
We did?
90
00:05:11,193 --> 00:05:13,883
Yeah, you... You
don't remember that?
91
00:05:13,910 --> 00:05:16,503
Uh, I've done a lot
of cool stuff, Ted.
92
00:05:17,403 --> 00:05:20,284
Oh, my God.
93
00:05:20,297 --> 00:05:22,097
I just... I just realized:
94
00:05:22,130 --> 00:05:23,535
Who am I gonna
high five now?
95
00:05:24,255 --> 00:05:27,751
- Come on, dude. - No, no,
I'm being serious. What if I see...
96
00:05:27,776 --> 00:05:30,782
a pack of lions fighting
a tyrannosaurus?
97
00:05:30,795 --> 00:05:32,409
Or, better yet,
98
00:05:32,428 --> 00:05:33,993
what if I see boobs?
99
00:05:34,016 --> 00:05:35,469
Who am I... who am I
gonna high five then?
100
00:05:35,475 --> 00:05:37,936
- You can high five Marshall.
- Yeah, yeah. But Marshall
101
00:05:37,949 --> 00:05:39,855
only likes to high
five about Lily boobs.
102
00:05:39,875 --> 00:05:41,736
Oh, always.
103
00:05:43,260 --> 00:05:46,482
Okay, Barney.
I have an idea.
104
00:05:46,505 --> 00:05:51,635
One last high five. A high five
to echo throughout eternity.
105
00:05:52,143 --> 00:05:53,723
Yes.
106
00:05:53,736 --> 00:05:56,978
And within that high five will be all
the high fives we've ever high fived.
107
00:05:56,997 --> 00:06:00,478
And all the high fives we could
ever possibly high five.
108
00:06:00,498 --> 00:06:03,817
- A high infinity.
- A high infinity, exactly.
109
00:06:03,837 --> 00:06:06,221
Let's do this. All right,
everybody back up.
110
00:06:06,244 --> 00:06:08,277
Oh, boy.
111
00:06:12,048 --> 00:06:14,828
I'll see you on the
other side, Ray.
112
00:06:14,841 --> 00:06:17,775
Nice working with
you, Dr. Venkman.
113
00:06:20,718 --> 00:06:22,718
Aah!
114
00:06:23,127 --> 00:06:24,527
- Ow!
- Ow!
115
00:06:24,546 --> 00:06:27,457
- Oh. Oh.
- Oh!
116
00:06:28,086 --> 00:06:30,936
- Worth it.
- So worth it.
117
00:06:31,828 --> 00:06:36,368
So I rushed out to make the train,
which is now 45 minutes late.
118
00:06:36,380 --> 00:06:38,480
This lady with the
bass guitar--
119
00:06:38,509 --> 00:06:40,354
was she pretty?
120
00:06:43,661 --> 00:06:46,022
Yeah. She was beautiful.
121
00:06:46,035 --> 00:06:48,863
- Go back and meet her.
- No.
122
00:06:48,883 --> 00:06:51,090
But what if it
was destiny?
123
00:06:51,110 --> 00:06:53,590
Lady, it's been a
really long weekend.
124
00:06:53,603 --> 00:06:56,556
I'm moving to
Chicago tomorrow.
125
00:06:56,569 --> 00:06:59,083
I can't really talk
destiny right now.
126
00:06:59,105 --> 00:07:01,309
Okay.
127
00:07:09,204 --> 00:07:10,404
Yes?
128
00:07:10,423 --> 00:07:14,797
What if the universe
sent you a gigantic sign
129
00:07:14,810 --> 00:07:17,978
that this woman
was your destiny?
130
00:07:18,005 --> 00:07:20,166
Then would you talk to her?
131
00:07:21,355 --> 00:07:23,993
Yeah, sure. I mean, I-I
guess I would have to.
132
00:07:24,012 --> 00:07:26,114
- Okay.
- Okay.
133
00:07:27,148 --> 00:07:28,986
Where is that train?
134
00:07:29,005 --> 00:07:31,439
Can I ask one
more question?
135
00:07:31,457 --> 00:07:32,477
What?
136
00:07:32,496 --> 00:07:35,480
This girl with the
bass guitar--
137
00:07:35,507 --> 00:07:37,578
is that her?
138
00:07:43,863 --> 00:07:45,763
That is her, isn't it?
139
00:07:46,621 --> 00:07:49,780
This is so exciting.
G-Go talk to her.
140
00:07:49,793 --> 00:07:52,101
All right. Just be
cool, lady. Damn.
141
00:07:52,114 --> 00:07:53,853
Why are you still
sitting here?
142
00:07:53,873 --> 00:07:57,442
Because I'm moving to
Chicago tomorrow, remember?
143
00:07:57,460 --> 00:08:02,247
And 24 hours from now, my life is
gonna be completely different.
144
00:08:03,054 --> 00:08:05,438
This is so strange, you
know, now that Ted's
145
00:08:05,451 --> 00:08:09,244
gone, it's just a...
a different vibe.
146
00:08:09,270 --> 00:08:13,069
You can just f-feel
his absence.
147
00:08:13,091 --> 00:08:15,484
- Are you kidding me?!
- Oh, hey.
148
00:08:15,504 --> 00:08:18,531
What are you doing in New York?
Aren't you supposed to be in Chicago?
149
00:08:18,547 --> 00:08:20,080
No... Oh.
150
00:08:20,109 --> 00:08:22,546
- Yeah, I'm not doing that.
- What? - What?
151
00:08:22,559 --> 00:08:25,695
- I'm not moving to Chicago.
- Why?
152
00:08:26,701 --> 00:08:29,580
- I met a girl.
- You... son of a bitch!
153
00:08:29,594 --> 00:08:32,975
What is the matter with you? How
could you put us through that?
154
00:08:32,988 --> 00:08:35,578
That good-bye was
emotionally devastating.
155
00:08:35,598 --> 00:08:38,529
A certain delicate flower cried
all night in the shower.
156
00:08:38,544 --> 00:08:40,644
And I was pretty
bummed, too.
157
00:08:40,657 --> 00:08:42,990
And now you're staying
because of some girl?
158
00:08:43,003 --> 00:08:45,403
I mean, who is
this person?
159
00:08:45,417 --> 00:08:46,964
The bass player from
the wedding band.
160
00:08:46,977 --> 00:08:48,348
Oh, yeah, she's great.
161
00:08:48,370 --> 00:08:50,871
- Love her.
- Right, right?
162
00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:53,433
- What are you... What are you doing?
- Calling her.
163
00:08:53,462 --> 00:08:56,002
Don't do this. Don't
call her the next day.
164
00:08:56,028 --> 00:08:57,193
- You're blowing this.
- Huh?
165
00:08:57,215 --> 00:08:59,408
Three days. You wait
three days, Ted.
166
00:08:59,427 --> 00:09:02,967
H-Hey, it's Ted. Hi. Um,
167
00:09:02,987 --> 00:09:05,686
listen, do you... do you want
to have dinner tomorrow night?
168
00:09:05,706 --> 00:09:07,486
Great.
169
00:09:07,511 --> 00:09:09,811
It was clear I meant
with me, right?
170
00:09:09,833 --> 00:09:12,573
Same answer. Solid.
171
00:09:14,270 --> 00:09:15,851
Why does he keep
doing this?
172
00:09:15,871 --> 00:09:18,431
He meets 'em, he likes
'em way too much,
173
00:09:18,457 --> 00:09:21,544
he goes way too big, too soon,
and he ends up blowing it.
174
00:09:21,557 --> 00:09:23,539
I can't take this anymore.
175
00:09:23,561 --> 00:09:26,574
He's fallen in love
so many times now.
176
00:09:28,869 --> 00:09:31,023
Not like this.
177
00:09:31,042 --> 00:09:32,392
This is different.
178
00:09:32,964 --> 00:09:35,257
Come on, go talk to her.
179
00:09:35,276 --> 00:09:39,369
Oh, and it'll all be because of me.
And I'll sing at your wedding.
180
00:09:40,217 --> 00:09:42,137
Y-You are gonna have
a big wedding, right?
181
00:09:42,156 --> 00:09:45,327
What? No. Just be
cool, lady. Damn.
182
00:09:46,986 --> 00:09:49,647
And aren't big weddings
kind of a young man's game?
183
00:09:49,674 --> 00:09:51,714
You don't have a big
wedding in your 30s.
184
00:09:51,743 --> 00:09:53,783
If I do ever get married,
185
00:09:53,802 --> 00:09:55,249
I'm keeping it simple.
186
00:09:55,833 --> 00:09:57,820
A hot air balloon?
187
00:09:57,846 --> 00:09:59,732
Well, yeah. I mean, when
you're getting married
188
00:09:59,769 --> 00:10:02,284
in a 17th-century castle in
France and making your entrance
189
00:10:02,304 --> 00:10:04,326
on a stagecoach
with six white horses,
190
00:10:04,345 --> 00:10:06,945
you kind of got to
make a big exit.
191
00:10:06,974 --> 00:10:09,014
How much are you
spending on this?
192
00:10:09,027 --> 00:10:11,527
Oh, like, a lot of money.
193
00:10:11,556 --> 00:10:13,650
- Mm.
- All of my money.
194
00:10:13,670 --> 00:10:17,319
Look, I know you guys have been traveling
a lot, but you're coming, right?
195
00:10:17,332 --> 00:10:18,872
- Oh course. What...
- Duh.
196
00:10:20,730 --> 00:10:22,843
- I'll get the next round.
- Thanks.
197
00:10:22,864 --> 00:10:24,410
I'd offer, but...
198
00:10:24,442 --> 00:10:26,585
- Castle.
- Yeah.
199
00:10:28,003 --> 00:10:29,403
So, how you guys doing?
200
00:10:29,421 --> 00:10:31,488
I mean, Robin's really
taking off at work, huh?
201
00:10:31,501 --> 00:10:34,949
It's like, "Robin Scherbatsky,
World Wide News, Caracas."
202
00:10:34,968 --> 00:10:37,769
"Robin Scherbatsky, World Wide
News, St. Petersburg."
203
00:10:37,784 --> 00:10:40,937
"Robin Scherbatsky, World Wide News,
anywhere but New York, apparently."
204
00:10:42,011 --> 00:10:43,198
But it's great.
205
00:10:43,216 --> 00:10:48,212
Uh, it's makes things super difficult
for us, but it's great. It's great.
206
00:10:48,228 --> 00:10:50,695
It's great. It's great.
207
00:10:50,711 --> 00:10:51,866
One more and I'll believe you.
208
00:10:51,886 --> 00:10:54,539
- It's great.
- Sounds great.
209
00:10:54,566 --> 00:10:56,159
- Hey.
- Hi, hi. Sorry I'm late.
210
00:10:56,166 --> 00:10:57,613
- Can I talk to you for a minute?
- Yeah, sure.
211
00:10:57,633 --> 00:10:59,896
Did you wire the down
payment to the castle guy?
212
00:10:59,912 --> 00:11:01,236
I got a castle guy.
213
00:11:01,249 --> 00:11:03,810
I've got, like,
three castle guys.
214
00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:06,617
And a moat guy, so...
215
00:11:07,331 --> 00:11:09,499
I didn't wire the
payment because
216
00:11:09,521 --> 00:11:12,777
I don't think we can get
married in September.
217
00:11:12,802 --> 00:11:17,046
- What-What, why?
- Because, when I do get married,
218
00:11:17,075 --> 00:11:21,093
I kind of want to fit in...
219
00:11:21,112 --> 00:11:22,862
my dress.
220
00:11:23,685 --> 00:11:25,740
Why wouldn't you f...
221
00:11:27,004 --> 00:11:28,211
- No.
- Yeah.
222
00:11:28,241 --> 00:11:29,554
- No.
- Yeah.
223
00:11:29,582 --> 00:11:32,987
- Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
- Whoa.
224
00:11:34,689 --> 00:11:36,342
What's going on?
225
00:11:36,359 --> 00:11:38,999
She's getting a boob job.
226
00:11:40,561 --> 00:11:43,431
We just peeked in on Penny
asleep in the baby room.
227
00:11:43,458 --> 00:11:44,931
It's adorable.
228
00:11:44,947 --> 00:11:47,288
The whole place
looks great, guys.
229
00:11:47,314 --> 00:11:50,229
But I can't believe you let
Ted hang his jousting lance
230
00:11:50,242 --> 00:11:52,533
from the renaissance fair
on your bedroom wall.
231
00:11:53,317 --> 00:11:54,937
Yeah.
232
00:11:54,957 --> 00:11:56,661
That's Ted's.
233
00:11:56,678 --> 00:11:59,150
- So, Marshall, how's your
job going? - Mm.
234
00:11:59,181 --> 00:12:03,314
My chair... is
reasonably comfortable.
235
00:12:03,340 --> 00:12:05,496
For short periods of time.
236
00:12:05,514 --> 00:12:10,535
Marshall has decided to say only positive
things about being back in corporate law.
237
00:12:10,549 --> 00:12:14,749
- So you hate it? - Much of what
I do does not make me cry.
238
00:12:14,775 --> 00:12:16,935
Hey, what about you guys?
239
00:12:16,976 --> 00:12:18,990
How was Argentina?
240
00:12:19,724 --> 00:12:21,964
Great. It was great.
241
00:12:21,990 --> 00:12:23,496
- It was great.
- It was great.
242
00:12:23,519 --> 00:12:24,979
- It was great.
- It was great.
243
00:12:24,999 --> 00:12:27,466
It was great.
244
00:12:28,267 --> 00:12:29,867
One more and I'll
believe you.
245
00:12:31,128 --> 00:12:33,141
This is so not great.
246
00:12:33,160 --> 00:12:35,709
I'm sorry that I have
to work while I'm here.
247
00:12:35,721 --> 00:12:37,397
It's called being on assignment.
248
00:12:37,411 --> 00:12:40,264
Well, what about me? There's
no Wi-Fi in this hotel.
249
00:12:40,277 --> 00:12:43,153
How am I supposed to run a
business, Robin, with no Wi-Fi?
250
00:12:43,173 --> 00:12:45,477
It's not a business,
Barney, it's a blog, okay?
251
00:12:45,510 --> 00:12:47,673
It is a lifestyle blog.
252
00:12:47,694 --> 00:12:50,340
For the upscale, sophisticated
urban gentleman,
253
00:12:50,365 --> 00:12:54,888
and it's never gonna take off if
I can't post today's boner joke.
254
00:12:58,233 --> 00:13:00,314
I know I'm always traveling.
255
00:13:00,340 --> 00:13:02,068
We both hate it when I'm
gone, we both hate it
256
00:13:02,081 --> 00:13:05,379
when I drag you with me.
Neither of us is happy.
257
00:13:07,086 --> 00:13:09,086
Is this just not
working anymore?
258
00:13:09,113 --> 00:13:12,220
Wait, w... What "this"?
This-this?
259
00:13:12,241 --> 00:13:14,518
If I gave you an out,
260
00:13:14,543 --> 00:13:16,136
right now--
261
00:13:16,152 --> 00:13:20,983
if there was an exit ramp right
here at the three-year mark--
262
00:13:22,367 --> 00:13:24,367
would you take it?
263
00:13:26,144 --> 00:13:27,360
Before I answer
that, real quick:
264
00:13:27,373 --> 00:13:30,267
- You want to get super drunk and
have sex right now? - Of course.
265
00:13:30,857 --> 00:13:33,304
And then, one thing
led to another.
266
00:13:33,333 --> 00:13:34,761
And then another.
267
00:13:34,774 --> 00:13:38,023
- And then another after that.
- Oh. - Oh.
268
00:13:38,049 --> 00:13:42,258
And we kept drinking, and may
have had a little... too much.
269
00:13:46,945 --> 00:13:48,328
Arigato.
270
00:13:48,358 --> 00:13:51,751
Wow, these rooms all look the
same, even when you're sober.
271
00:13:51,764 --> 00:13:53,484
You're sober?
272
00:13:55,001 --> 00:13:57,414
So, um...
273
00:13:57,440 --> 00:14:01,321
about what we
discussed last night.
274
00:14:02,565 --> 00:14:04,755
How do you feel?
275
00:14:11,687 --> 00:14:14,200
I love you, Robin.
276
00:14:17,306 --> 00:14:19,599
And when we got married,
277
00:14:19,612 --> 00:14:24,989
I made a vow that I would
always tell you the truth.
278
00:14:26,789 --> 00:14:29,516
We got divorced.
279
00:14:37,824 --> 00:14:40,500
I can't believe you got
divorced without telling us.
280
00:14:40,520 --> 00:14:43,256
This is my mom and
dad all over again.
281
00:14:43,273 --> 00:14:45,228
Barney, if you start
brewing your own beer now
282
00:14:45,252 --> 00:14:49,634
- and nail my prom date, so help me...
- Years too late on one of those, Teddy.
283
00:14:49,654 --> 00:14:52,689
Guys, it's okay. This
isn't a failed marriage.
284
00:14:52,715 --> 00:14:57,095
It's a very successful marriage that
happened to only last three years.
285
00:14:57,117 --> 00:14:59,117
You both want this?
286
00:14:59,138 --> 00:15:00,764
For real?
287
00:15:00,797 --> 00:15:02,617
We do.
288
00:15:02,641 --> 00:15:04,524
For real.
289
00:15:06,224 --> 00:15:09,255
- Lily, you okay?
- Of course I'm not okay.
290
00:15:09,269 --> 00:15:11,489
This ruins everything.
291
00:15:11,509 --> 00:15:15,015
Now we have to choose sides, and
obviously we're gonna choose Robin,
292
00:15:15,035 --> 00:15:17,795
but Barney has
his moments.
293
00:15:17,820 --> 00:15:20,120
I really liked the
boner joke of the day.
294
00:15:20,147 --> 00:15:22,243
Look, you guys do not
need to pick sides.
295
00:15:22,276 --> 00:15:23,343
Nothing has to change.
296
00:15:23,363 --> 00:15:26,756
No. We've already broken up before
and we've stayed friends, remember?
297
00:15:26,775 --> 00:15:31,437
As long as you promise me this
won't mean we stop hanging out.
298
00:15:31,457 --> 00:15:32,624
Okay.
299
00:15:32,644 --> 00:15:36,904
- I'm serious. - I know, but, I mean,
we hardly hang out anymore anyway.
300
00:15:36,934 --> 00:15:38,594
They live in the
suburbs now,
301
00:15:38,607 --> 00:15:41,287
and you two are about
to have baby number three.
302
00:15:42,225 --> 00:15:45,065
Please. You're so obvious.
303
00:15:45,089 --> 00:15:47,133
Your gals are back up
to a full C-cup,
304
00:15:47,153 --> 00:15:49,835
and you've been sipping
her drink all night long.
305
00:15:50,391 --> 00:15:52,938
We didn't want to announce
anything till we knew for sure.
306
00:15:52,958 --> 00:15:54,385
Oh, my gosh, Lily!
307
00:15:54,402 --> 00:15:56,222
- Oh, congratulations!
- That's amazing!
308
00:15:56,240 --> 00:15:58,032
- Oh, my God.
- Wait, see?
309
00:15:58,058 --> 00:16:03,402
This, right here, this is why we can't
fall out of each other's lives.
310
00:16:03,426 --> 00:16:05,799
We have to be here
for the big moments.
311
00:16:05,812 --> 00:16:08,318
Just promise me,
no matter what,
312
00:16:08,341 --> 00:16:11,628
we will always be there
for the big moments.
313
00:16:11,645 --> 00:16:15,528
I-I promise. We'll-we'll always
be there for the big moments.
314
00:16:16,295 --> 00:16:18,505
- Mm.
- See?
315
00:16:18,524 --> 00:16:20,500
It's like this whole divorce
thing never happened.
316
00:16:21,892 --> 00:16:23,341
I...
317
00:16:26,412 --> 00:16:28,952
- Hey. - Hi, sweetie.
How was work?
318
00:16:28,965 --> 00:16:34,756
My-my boss only called me three
words that meant "vagina" today.
319
00:16:34,782 --> 00:16:36,830
- How are the kids?
- Asleep.
320
00:16:36,850 --> 00:16:38,977
Good. This is working, right?
321
00:16:38,997 --> 00:16:42,840
Marvin and Daisy sharing a room
together? It's not too cramped?
322
00:16:42,866 --> 00:16:46,103
And then when the next one arrives,
we'll just put her crib...
323
00:16:46,128 --> 00:16:47,215
in the shower.
324
00:16:47,234 --> 00:16:49,378
It's the perfect size.
It'll save time on cleanups...
325
00:16:49,398 --> 00:16:53,367
- Let's move somewhere bigger.
- Yes. Oh, thank God.
326
00:16:53,386 --> 00:16:54,842
I mean...
327
00:16:54,867 --> 00:16:57,915
You know, don't get me wrong.
I love this apartment.
328
00:16:57,928 --> 00:17:00,103
How do you say good-bye
to so many special memories?
329
00:17:00,122 --> 00:17:02,969
- Cock-a-mouse!
- We have to move!
330
00:17:07,608 --> 00:17:09,868
- Hey, Marshall.
- Robin!
331
00:17:09,894 --> 00:17:12,227
Hey, I'm so glad you're here.
It's-it's been forever.
332
00:17:12,250 --> 00:17:13,777
- Oh, hey.
- Hey.
333
00:17:13,792 --> 00:17:15,205
Where's your...
where's your costume?
334
00:17:15,224 --> 00:17:20,416
Oh, uh, it's been a crazy week at
work so no time to go shopping.
335
00:17:20,435 --> 00:17:22,230
Uh, well, who are
you supposed to be?
336
00:17:22,246 --> 00:17:25,256
Okay, I want to make it
clear this is not my idea.
337
00:17:25,276 --> 00:17:26,716
I'm Captain Ahab.
338
00:17:26,738 --> 00:17:28,278
Why is it bad if
it was your idea?
339
00:17:28,298 --> 00:17:30,773
- Robin, you made it!
- A white whale. Got it.
340
00:17:30,788 --> 00:17:33,255
- Aw. Hi.
- Hi.
341
00:17:33,272 --> 00:17:38,187
Yeah, I figured, people are thinkin' it.
Might as well steer into the skid, right?
342
00:17:38,206 --> 00:17:40,333
- Where's your costume?
- Oh, you know, I've just been so...
343
00:17:40,359 --> 00:17:42,371
Oh, my God, Marshall!
344
00:17:42,390 --> 00:17:46,895
Guess whose digits I just scored?
The slutty police officer's...
345
00:17:46,915 --> 00:17:48,696
tax attorney.
346
00:17:48,719 --> 00:17:49,992
Hey, Robin!
347
00:17:50,020 --> 00:17:51,633
- Hey.
- Didn't see you there.
348
00:17:52,801 --> 00:17:54,381
Saved it.
349
00:17:54,407 --> 00:17:58,862
Sorry, I got to pee. I-I'll
be back in... an hour.
350
00:18:02,222 --> 00:18:06,017
Oh, man. Is Ted still wearing
his hanging chad costume?
351
00:18:06,041 --> 00:18:07,361
How old is that thing?
352
00:18:07,386 --> 00:18:12,529
It's gone from played out to charmingly
retro and back six or seven times now.
353
00:18:12,548 --> 00:18:14,341
Kind of like Ted himself.
354
00:18:14,354 --> 00:18:16,431
Tonight it's working
for him though.
355
00:18:16,966 --> 00:18:18,999
How do you do this, Ted?
356
00:18:19,024 --> 00:18:22,251
How do you sit out here all
night on the roof in the cold
357
00:18:22,271 --> 00:18:25,078
and still have faith your
pumpkin's gonna show up?
358
00:18:25,098 --> 00:18:27,589
Look, I know that odds are
the love of my life
359
00:18:27,611 --> 00:18:31,748
isn't gonna magically walk through
that door in a pumpkin costume at...
360
00:18:31,776 --> 00:18:35,149
2:43 in the
morning, but...
361
00:18:35,176 --> 00:18:38,709
this seems as nice a spot
as any to just, you know...
362
00:18:38,722 --> 00:18:40,372
sit and wait.
363
00:18:48,878 --> 00:18:50,051
Um...
364
00:18:50,077 --> 00:18:53,425
uh, c-can you tell
Lily I-I had to go?
365
00:18:53,451 --> 00:18:54,445
I got to split.
366
00:18:57,374 --> 00:19:01,555
Speaking of splits, do you think I can do a
split in midair like my boy David Lee Roth?
367
00:19:01,571 --> 00:19:04,085
- I know you can't.
- Challenge accepted.
368
00:19:05,783 --> 00:19:08,968
Oh, my scrotum!
369
00:19:16,151 --> 00:19:19,212
I can't get out of this thing.
I'm holding it.
370
00:19:19,218 --> 00:19:20,619
Wait, are you leaving?
371
00:19:20,644 --> 00:19:23,084
Yeah, I got a big day tomorrow.
I got to get some sleep.
372
00:19:23,097 --> 00:19:26,400
No, you can't leave.
This is a big moment.
373
00:19:26,406 --> 00:19:28,696
We're saying good-bye
to the apartment.
374
00:19:28,702 --> 00:19:31,089
The whole gang
has to be here.
375
00:19:31,109 --> 00:19:32,656
The gang?
376
00:19:32,669 --> 00:19:35,929
Do you know who the
gang is to me, Lily?
377
00:19:35,940 --> 00:19:37,240
Here's what the gang is:
378
00:19:37,246 --> 00:19:39,633
The gang is a married couple
379
00:19:39,662 --> 00:19:43,297
who I never see anymore, about
to have their third kid;
380
00:19:43,317 --> 00:19:48,119
It's my ex-husband, hitting on
slutty cops right in front of me;
381
00:19:48,145 --> 00:19:52,049
And it's the guy I probably
should have ended up with
382
00:19:52,068 --> 00:19:54,849
with the beautiful
mother of his child.
383
00:19:54,872 --> 00:19:57,056
Oh...
384
00:19:58,975 --> 00:20:02,295
Oh, oh, so... so what?
385
00:20:02,314 --> 00:20:04,921
This is all
just over then?
386
00:20:05,803 --> 00:20:08,496
Our whole friendship
is just over?
387
00:20:08,515 --> 00:20:11,649
No. No, of course not.
Look, we'll...
388
00:20:11,668 --> 00:20:14,568
we'll always be friends.
It's just...
389
00:20:14,581 --> 00:20:17,568
never gonna be how it was.
390
00:20:17,584 --> 00:20:19,540
It can't be.
391
00:20:19,575 --> 00:20:22,835
And that doesn't have
to be a sad thing.
392
00:20:22,861 --> 00:20:27,388
There-There's so much wonderful stuff
happening in all of our lives right now.
393
00:20:27,404 --> 00:20:30,157
Look, more than enough
to be grateful for.
394
00:20:30,913 --> 00:20:36,173
But the five of us hanging out at
MacLaren's, being young and stupid...
395
00:20:37,054 --> 00:20:39,479
that's just not one
of those things.
396
00:20:41,797 --> 00:20:44,075
I got to go.
397
00:20:44,095 --> 00:20:46,220
Good night, Lily.
398
00:20:48,041 --> 00:20:49,980
Good night.
399
00:21:06,994 --> 00:21:11,994
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
Resync for WEB-DL by Norther