1
00:00:01,252 --> 00:00:05,154
Dude, I'm not gonna read this bullshit. Just get me a Coors.

2
00:00:05,223 --> 00:00:08,624
"What do I think my greatest strength as a server Is?
' What the hell is this, Frank?

3
00:00:08,693 --> 00:00:10,627
Employee evaluation.

4
00:00:10,695 --> 00:00:14,426
This bar is a business, and we're gonna start acting like one.

5
00:00:14,499 --> 00:00:17,832
I do not want to start acting like a
business because that sounds boring as shit.

6
00:00:17,902 --> 00:00:21,838
Yeah, that sounds terrible. Plus this thing's
10 pages long. I'm not gonna fill it out.

7
00:00:21,906 --> 00:00:23,965
Well, that's gonna affect your rank. What rank?

8
00:00:24,042 --> 00:00:28,001
I put us all on a ranking system so
you kids would care about your jobs.

9
00:00:28,079 --> 00:00:30,411
Are we ranked now? Yes, we are.

10
00:00:30,481 --> 00:00:31,812
What's my rank? Second, after me.

11
00:00:31,883 --> 00:00:33,908
Wait! What's my rank? You're third.

12
00:00:33,985 --> 00:00:35,976
What? Why am I third?

13
00:00:36,054 --> 00:00:39,455
Too volatile. Bullshit! That is bullshit!

14
00:00:39,524 --> 00:00:41,958
Okay, okay. What am I? You're fifth.

15
00:00:42,026 --> 00:00:46,258
Fifth? That's last. Why in the hell would I be last?
Too much lip and very sassy.

16
00:00:46,331 --> 00:00:48,265
Sassy? That doesn't make sense.

17
00:00:48,333 --> 00:00:50,801
Like right now. You just don't know when to shut up. Hello!

18
00:00:50,868 --> 00:00:52,768
You are late.

19
00:00:52,837 --> 00:00:55,067
I just signed the bar up to host a dance competition...

20
00:00:55,139 --> 00:00:59,872
that's gonna be hosted live by the Q Crew on 102 Radio!

21
00:00:59,944 --> 00:01:02,139
Whoa! The Q Crew! Good work!

22
00:01:02,213 --> 00:01:05,979
Oh, yeah, yeah. That would be a good idea,
except it's not a dance contest.

23
00:01:06,050 --> 00:01:08,644
It's a dance marathon. What's the point?

24
00:01:08,720 --> 00:01:12,850
It's an endurance competition. We're gonna
be enduring free promotion on the radio.

25
00:01:12,924 --> 00:01:14,858
Yeah. "Location: Paddy's Bar.

26
00:01:14,926 --> 00:01:17,793
Saturday. Date: With Charlie Kelly.

27
00:01:17,862 --> 00:01:20,228
Paddy's Pub"?

28
00:01:20,298 --> 00:01:22,232
You put the bar up as a prize?

29
00:01:22,300 --> 00:01:25,633
No, no. I put the bar under the "Pride" section...
things that you're proud of.

30
00:01:25,703 --> 00:01:27,967
It's a "Z," Charlie! Prize!

31
00:01:28,039 --> 00:01:30,735
Didn't you read that goddamn thing? I gave it a onceover!

32
00:01:30,808 --> 00:01:34,039
Your illiteracy has screwed us again,
Charlie! Your illiteracy is screwing us!

33
00:01:34,112 --> 00:01:37,047
That doesn't make any sense! I have an important question.

34
00:01:37,115 --> 00:01:39,515
Does this make Charlie number five and I'm number four?

35
00:01:39,584 --> 00:01:42,018
Because in light of this new information... Dee! Shut up!

36
00:01:42,086 --> 00:01:45,522
Stop with the sass! This is what Frank is talking about!
You never know when to shut up.

37
00:01:45,590 --> 00:01:49,822
Maybe this thing isn't legal.
No, it's legal. There was a lawyer there.

38
00:01:49,894 --> 00:01:53,694
What are we gonna do now? We're gonna dance our asses off!

39
00:02:31,369 --> 00:02:33,633
Hey, everybody.

40
00:02:33,704 --> 00:02:37,640
DJ Squirrely D and Fat Michael here from Q102. The Q Crew.

41
00:02:37,708 --> 00:02:41,542
Coming to you from Paddy's Pub!
Kicking off our old-time dance marathon.

42
00:02:41,612 --> 00:02:44,706
Where the owners have put up their bar as the first prize.

43
00:02:44,782 --> 00:02:48,274
Hey, how about a quick recap of the rules for
our listeners who just tuned in. Fat Michael!

44
00:02:48,352 --> 00:02:51,651
All dancers must remain on their feet and dancing at all times.

45
00:02:51,722 --> 00:02:54,247
If you drop to the floor, you are out.

46
00:02:54,325 --> 00:02:56,259
People, this could take hours. It could take days.

47
00:02:56,327 --> 00:02:59,888
It could take weeks. So stay tuned,
'cause someone's gonna win a bar!

48
00:02:59,964 --> 00:03:02,228
But only right here on Q102. The Q Crew!

49
00:03:02,300 --> 00:03:04,825
Good job, Charlie. Good work.

50
00:03:04,902 --> 00:03:09,339
Take it easy and enjoy yourself,
'cause I'm gonna win this thing with this right here!

51
00:03:09,407 --> 00:03:13,138
What the hell is that? Eighth grade
dance competition. I won to this song.

52
00:03:13,211 --> 00:03:15,179
It's an endurance competition, Charlie.

53
00:03:15,246 --> 00:03:17,680
We're not gonna win the bar back
with some dance you did in 1989.

54
00:03:17,748 --> 00:03:20,410
They don't care if you can dance well. It's a marathon.

55
00:03:20,485 --> 00:03:22,578
Whoo! What's up, assholes? Ooh!

56
00:03:22,653 --> 00:03:25,417
What the hell you doing here? I'm here to win your bar.

57
00:03:25,490 --> 00:03:28,687
Ooh! Awesome. This whole thing was a mistake.
So maybe you can help us win the bar back.

58
00:03:28,759 --> 00:03:31,159
Why would I ever help you do anything?

59
00:03:31,229 --> 00:03:33,129
All you've ever done... Stop.

60
00:03:33,197 --> 00:03:36,132
All you've ever done is screw me over.
Now I'm here to win back your bar.

61
00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:38,134
We're good though, right? Go to hell.

62
00:03:38,202 --> 00:03:41,797
Hey, do you want to partner up in this dance
competition? Stop touching me, Charlie.

63
00:03:41,873 --> 00:03:45,309
Hello, jerks. Oh! Surprised to see me back?

64
00:03:45,376 --> 00:03:48,311
Rickety Cricket. I suppose you're here to
win the bar because we ruined your life.

65
00:03:48,379 --> 00:03:52,145
Good guess. And I'm gonna win this bar
with the help of my shiny new legs.

66
00:03:52,216 --> 00:03:56,152
The latest leg brace technology courtesy
of the great state of Pennsylvania.

67
00:03:56,220 --> 00:03:59,348
Hey. Maybe we should partner up, ruin their lives together.

68
00:03:59,423 --> 00:04:01,288
Maybe we should.

69
00:04:01,359 --> 00:04:03,293
Jealous? No.

70
00:04:03,361 --> 00:04:05,158
Let's go, Cricket. It's Matthew.

71
00:04:05,229 --> 00:04:08,255
Holy shit. What's going on with Rickety Cricket's new legs?

72
00:04:08,332 --> 00:04:10,357
They look so sturdy. He's, like, half machine.

73
00:04:10,434 --> 00:04:13,562
He's got, like, a liquid hydraulic
cooling system going on with that thing.

74
00:04:13,638 --> 00:04:16,038
That's cheating, dude. He's gonna win with those things, man.

75
00:04:16,107 --> 00:04:19,133
It's like an exoskeleton. It's exactly like an exoskeleton!

76
00:04:19,210 --> 00:04:21,178
We'll have to resort to foul play.

77
00:04:21,245 --> 00:04:24,180
Look, there's no point in taking any chances. Let's get dirty.

78
00:04:24,248 --> 00:04:27,843
Maybe he'll sweat so much he'll rust those bionic legs.
We should kick him in the dick!

79
00:04:27,919 --> 00:04:31,252
What is that awful noise?

80
00:04:31,322 --> 00:04:33,256
We got our first dance-off challenge!

81
00:04:33,324 --> 00:04:36,157
I need Mac to collect his dignity and
step to the center of this dance floor.

82
00:04:36,227 --> 00:04:38,161
What?

83
00:04:38,229 --> 00:04:41,221
We've only been dancing for two minutes. Who's challenged me?

84
00:04:51,742 --> 00:04:54,905
Oh, shit.

85
00:04:54,979 --> 00:04:58,039
Our two dancers have one song to strut...

86
00:04:58,115 --> 00:04:59,548
Their stuff!

87
00:04:59,617 --> 00:05:02,916
The loser will have to wear this 25pound keg around his neck...

88
00:05:02,987 --> 00:05:04,921
for the rest of the competition.

89
00:05:04,989 --> 00:05:07,253
Talk about a ball and chain. I'm going through a messy divorce.

90
00:05:07,325 --> 00:05:09,259
He's not gonna go down easy. No way.

91
00:05:09,327 --> 00:05:13,229
He's fueled by vengeance and
reinforced with space age technology.

92
00:05:13,297 --> 00:05:15,891
And go!

93
00:05:15,967 --> 00:05:19,027
My legs!

94
00:05:19,103 --> 00:05:22,231
The technology failed me! He's fallen and he can't get up!

95
00:05:22,306 --> 00:05:25,139
I am stealing that line! It's already yours!

96
00:05:25,209 --> 00:05:28,076
All right, folks. That's our first casualty of the night.

97
00:05:28,145 --> 00:05:30,113
But stay tuned. There's plenty more where that came from.

98
00:05:30,181 --> 00:05:32,775
Why don't we mix things up a little bit...
By slowing things down.

99
00:05:32,850 --> 00:05:35,614
Everybody couple up and hit the dance floor.

100
00:05:35,686 --> 00:05:37,881
Don't be afraid to get "sextra" close.

101
00:05:37,955 --> 00:05:41,118
Osmond close on Q 102. The Q Crew.

102
00:05:43,194 --> 00:05:46,129
I do not even understand the smell coming from your body, dude.

103
00:05:46,197 --> 00:05:48,722
Relax, dude. I forgot to put on deodorant.

104
00:05:48,799 --> 00:05:51,563
You gonna give me shit all day?
I have never seen you wear deodorant, Charlie.

105
00:05:51,636 --> 00:05:54,799
You've never seen me wash my testicles,
but that doesn't mean I don't do it every Friday.

106
00:05:54,872 --> 00:05:57,306
And I swear to God you've got lice, man.

107
00:05:57,375 --> 00:05:59,775
I see little bugs crawling all over your body.

108
00:05:59,844 --> 00:06:03,143
That's glitter. I tried to make myself look
a little fancy for this dance competition.

109
00:06:03,214 --> 00:06:06,149
Oh, Mr. Fancy Pants. Excuse me.
I'm just trying to have a good competition here.

110
00:06:06,217 --> 00:06:08,242
I gotta get outta here. When is the partner switch?

111
00:06:08,319 --> 00:06:12,380
Ooh, this could be a great idea to shake things
up a little bit with the other contestants.

112
00:06:12,456 --> 00:06:14,924
You know, use the partner switch to get inside people's heads.

113
00:06:14,992 --> 00:06:18,428
Why is the person that's ranked last trying
to hatch a plan? Yeah, I wonder that too.

114
00:06:18,496 --> 00:06:20,430
I just came up with an idea though.

115
00:06:20,498 --> 00:06:24,366
This could be a good opportunity to shake
things up with the other contestants.

116
00:06:24,435 --> 00:06:27,927
We could use this partner switch to get into people's heads.

117
00:06:28,005 --> 00:06:29,939
Now you're talking! Are you being serious?

118
00:06:30,007 --> 00:06:34,205
Shut up. We're hatching a plan. But we're gonna
need a man on the outside. Frank, that's you.

119
00:06:34,278 --> 00:06:36,439
Why? Because I'm old? That's bullshit!

120
00:06:36,514 --> 00:06:38,379
No, dude. Because you're the best at scheming.

121
00:06:38,449 --> 00:06:41,179
We need you on the outside running things. Take a knee.

122
00:06:41,252 --> 00:06:43,812
Kneel down. Take a knee for the team, buddy.

123
00:06:43,888 --> 00:06:46,618
Yeah, there you go! Yeah!

124
00:06:46,691 --> 00:06:48,716
Ooh! Another one bites the dust. Q Crew!

125
00:06:48,793 --> 00:06:50,954
We did just screw him over to kick
him out of the contest, right?

126
00:06:51,028 --> 00:06:53,223
Absolutely, yeah. What?

127
00:06:53,297 --> 00:06:57,199
And by the way, Frank, when we get
the bar back, you're ranked last!

128
00:06:57,268 --> 00:07:00,499
You can't rank me last. I created the ranking system.

129
00:07:00,571 --> 00:07:02,903
Then you shouldn't have dropped out, you old bitch.

130
00:07:02,973 --> 00:07:05,203
You lousy bastards.

131
00:07:05,276 --> 00:07:08,040
So who's next? Who's looking good out there?

132
00:07:08,112 --> 00:07:11,081
That young couple over there looks
pretty limber. We should take them out.

133
00:07:11,148 --> 00:07:14,515
Okay, I'll take the girl. I'm gonna dance
with the waitress for a little while.

134
00:07:14,585 --> 00:07:18,578
That's not gonna work. Mac, take the waitress.
You can tire her out with your spastic movement.

135
00:07:18,656 --> 00:07:21,591
I'll tire her out with my awesome movements.
Yeah, whatever it is.

136
00:07:23,661 --> 00:07:26,152
You should get into it more, Dee.

137
00:07:31,335 --> 00:07:34,771
Oh, this is great, Dee. I mean, this is so restful.

138
00:07:34,839 --> 00:07:37,774
I'm really building up my reserves
for later, you know? Mmm, yeah.

139
00:07:37,842 --> 00:07:40,902
I'm just really glad I can be of help, Charlie. Thank you.

140
00:07:42,646 --> 00:07:44,773
Mac and the waitress are getting pretty close.

141
00:07:44,849 --> 00:07:46,783
What's the matter? Can't keep up?

142
00:07:46,851 --> 00:07:50,514
No, I can't understand why you're dancing like that.
I feel like you're gonna hit me.

143
00:07:50,588 --> 00:07:52,283
Just... Please don't hit me.

144
00:07:52,356 --> 00:07:55,792
Good, good. Don't be afraid to get in real close, okay? Okay.

145
00:07:55,860 --> 00:07:59,694
How long have you been a dance instructor?
Oh, a long time. Years.

146
00:07:59,764 --> 00:08:01,629
My fiancé and I, we're not really dancers.

147
00:08:01,699 --> 00:08:04,634
We just joined this competition because
we both got laid off recently...

148
00:08:04,702 --> 00:08:07,637
Right, right, okay. I'm gonna dip you down now, okay?

149
00:08:07,705 --> 00:08:10,640
Just stick your knee into my groin, just like that.

150
00:08:10,708 --> 00:08:13,700
Grind your hips and pulse your thighs. Ready? Go.

151
00:08:14,712 --> 00:08:16,703
What the hell are you doing?

152
00:08:16,781 --> 00:08:20,808
Relax. He's an instructor. He's showing
me a new dance. What's it called again?

153
00:08:20,885 --> 00:08:23,319
The Rococo Bang. Oh, that's funny.

154
00:08:23,387 --> 00:08:25,582
Isn't it? Kinda looks like he's feeling you up.

155
00:08:25,656 --> 00:08:28,090
I don't want to get in the middle of anything here, okay?

156
00:08:28,159 --> 00:08:31,094
I'm just trying to teach your fiancée a new dance.

157
00:08:31,162 --> 00:08:33,096
You don't want to deprive her of that, do you?

158
00:08:33,164 --> 00:08:36,497
I think a little dance instruction might
help us last longer in the competition.

159
00:08:36,567 --> 00:08:39,832
All right. Just make it quick. I'll make it quick.

160
00:08:39,904 --> 00:08:44,170
All right now, Gloria, for this next part
you're gonna want to grip my buttocks.

161
00:08:44,241 --> 00:08:47,176
Okay. Like that? Right. Now we're gonna go down nice and low.

162
00:08:47,244 --> 00:08:51,146
Now grind and shift and around and
push and feel and grip and grip.

163
00:08:51,215 --> 00:08:53,513
I see. Yeah. Good.

164
00:08:55,753 --> 00:08:57,687
I'm over it anyway. Are you?

165
00:08:57,755 --> 00:09:01,691
So let's not worry about it. Let's just
talk about other things for a little bit.

166
00:09:01,759 --> 00:09:03,920
I'm glad you're over it, because he's definitely gonna bang her.

167
00:09:03,994 --> 00:09:06,485
He's gonna bang her? You're not over it!

168
00:09:06,564 --> 00:09:08,998
I gotta stop that. I can't let that go on.

169
00:09:09,066 --> 00:09:12,331
You know what I think you gotta do?
You gotta get Mac out of this competition.

170
00:09:12,403 --> 00:09:15,133
Yes! Yes! I gotta get him out. You gotta get rid of him.

171
00:09:15,206 --> 00:09:18,664
All right, how would I do that? I got an idea.

172
00:09:18,742 --> 00:09:21,302
They burned you, too, didn't they?

173
00:09:23,180 --> 00:09:25,114
I know how it feels.

174
00:09:25,182 --> 00:09:27,878
The pain, the hurt.

175
00:09:27,952 --> 00:09:33,219
How about you and me, we join forces, and we make things right?

176
00:09:33,290 --> 00:09:37,056
Get lost, street rat! I'm not a street...
I was a man of the cl...

177
00:09:37,127 --> 00:09:40,961
Look, I want these guys, Frank. I want 'em!

178
00:09:41,031 --> 00:09:44,489
And I will stalk the streets and
live in the shadows of the night...

179
00:09:44,568 --> 00:09:47,503
until the streets of Philadelphia run red with their blood!

180
00:09:47,571 --> 00:09:50,369
You got a lot of anger in you, kid. You're damn right!

181
00:09:50,441 --> 00:09:52,204
Are you in or out?

182
00:09:52,276 --> 00:09:55,302
I'm in. Yeah!

183
00:09:56,981 --> 00:10:00,508
Whoo! Here he is. Hey, bro. What a competition, huh?

184
00:10:00,584 --> 00:10:02,518
Saw you dancing with the waitress.

185
00:10:02,586 --> 00:10:06,022
But I'm not jealous. I'm very impressed with your dance moves.

186
00:10:06,090 --> 00:10:07,921
Thank you, Charlie.

187
00:10:07,992 --> 00:10:10,426
Much better dancing than people give you
credit for. I've always thought that.

188
00:10:10,494 --> 00:10:12,928
That whole elbow thing... You like the elbow thing?

189
00:10:12,997 --> 00:10:15,022
It's a very specifically choreographed...

190
00:10:15,099 --> 00:10:17,090
I'll show it to you one day. I don't want to learn it.

191
00:10:17,167 --> 00:10:18,998
You probably couldn't pull it off anyway.

192
00:10:19,069 --> 00:10:21,094
Hey, man. How do you feel about Dennis?

193
00:10:21,171 --> 00:10:24,538
Dennis? Dennis has been driving me crazy.

194
00:10:24,608 --> 00:10:28,271
I feel like he's a little jealous. And nervous.

195
00:10:28,345 --> 00:10:31,610
Nervous that you're gonna be ranked number
one when this whole thing goes down.

196
00:10:31,682 --> 00:10:33,946
You think so?

197
00:10:34,018 --> 00:10:35,952
Absolutely!

198
00:10:36,020 --> 00:10:39,501
First of all, you deserve to be ranked number one at the bar.

199
00:10:39,635 --> 00:10:42,263
I think I do, dude. I think I deserve to be number one.

200
00:10:42,337 --> 00:10:46,364
I've been working so hard for so many years.
The cream always rises to the top.

201
00:10:46,441 --> 00:10:49,535
And you're, like, made of cream,
and your cream is all over his face, man.

202
00:10:49,611 --> 00:10:52,045
That pisses him off. He hates that shit, dude.

203
00:10:52,114 --> 00:10:55,606
I'm always putting my cream all over his face,
and it pisses him off.

204
00:10:55,684 --> 00:10:57,515
I think we need to take Dennis out.

205
00:10:57,586 --> 00:10:59,554
You think? Yes!

206
00:10:59,621 --> 00:11:03,113
And there's only one way to do it. What's that?

207
00:11:08,430 --> 00:11:11,058
You don't want to do this, bro. Oh, I think I do, buddy.

208
00:11:11,133 --> 00:11:14,068
'Cause I got the moves that are gonna make me number one.

209
00:11:14,136 --> 00:11:17,572
Why don't you just go with the best dancer?

210
00:11:17,639 --> 00:11:20,870
Hit it.

211
00:11:34,122 --> 00:11:38,616
If I were you I'd take precaution

212
00:11:38,694 --> 00:11:41,925
Before I step to meet my girl

213
00:11:41,997 --> 00:11:43,931
Oh, goddamn it!

214
00:11:43,999 --> 00:11:47,935
Well, glad that's settled. I think I'm
gonna go get in that chick's pants now.

215
00:11:48,003 --> 00:11:50,164
I thought they were engaged, dude.

216
00:11:50,238 --> 00:11:53,173
"Engaged. " That's just a word. It doesn't mean anything.

217
00:11:53,241 --> 00:11:55,175
It means they're getting married.

218
00:11:55,243 --> 00:11:57,177
Married, engaged. They're just words, you know?

219
00:11:57,245 --> 00:12:00,180
My parents were married and engaged once.
You saw how that worked out.

220
00:12:00,248 --> 00:12:03,945
I'm gonna go bang that chick. Enjoy wearing
that keg for the rest of the competition.

221
00:12:04,019 --> 00:12:05,953
Yeah. Yeah, that's good.

222
00:12:06,021 --> 00:12:07,955
Looking a little stiff there, partner.

223
00:12:08,023 --> 00:12:10,423
Want me to give you a couple pointers? That's okay.

224
00:12:10,492 --> 00:12:13,484
Come on, man. Let me show you some moves.
He's just trying to help.

225
00:12:13,562 --> 00:12:16,087
All right, fine. Yeah? All right, here we go.

226
00:12:16,164 --> 00:12:18,098
I'm gonna pretend like you're Gloria, okay?

227
00:12:18,166 --> 00:12:22,193
Now, you're not nearly as beautiful as she is,
but I can use my imagination.

228
00:12:22,270 --> 00:12:26,036
What I'm gonna do is I'm gonna teach you
how to dip her. That's really important.

229
00:12:26,108 --> 00:12:29,339
I'm gonna put my arm around your waist
just like that. Don't stop. Keep moving.

230
00:12:29,411 --> 00:12:31,811
We don't want you out of the competition, right? No!

231
00:12:31,880 --> 00:12:35,179
Then I'm gonna bend my knees and dip you down real low.

232
00:12:35,250 --> 00:12:37,775
My goodness! What happened? You lost your grip?

233
00:12:37,853 --> 00:12:40,344
You dropped me on purpose, asshole! Calm down, Robert.

234
00:12:40,422 --> 00:12:43,152
It's perfectly natural to blame the teacher at first.
We're all feeling a little tired.

235
00:12:43,225 --> 00:12:46,661
You son of a bitch! Robert, stop. Come on. It was an accident.

236
00:12:46,728 --> 00:12:49,162
Oh, come on! Let's get out of here!

237
00:12:49,231 --> 00:12:52,894
Wait a second. Gloria, you've come this far.
You don't want to stop now.

238
00:12:52,968 --> 00:12:56,734
Wow. Butt out, man. This is none of
your business. Now come on, honey!

239
00:12:56,805 --> 00:12:59,296
We came here to win. We need this!

240
00:13:00,942 --> 00:13:03,570
Wow. He's a violent guy.

241
00:13:03,645 --> 00:13:07,672
I know. I hate it when he gets like that.
Gotta be careful with that one.

242
00:13:07,749 --> 00:13:09,683
Goddamn it.

243
00:13:09,751 --> 00:13:11,685
I feel your pain, Mac.

244
00:13:11,753 --> 00:13:14,745
We all do. What the hell's going on out here?

245
00:13:14,823 --> 00:13:16,757
We're making brownies. The drug filled kind.

246
00:13:16,825 --> 00:13:19,419
Shut up, Cricket! What's he talking about, Frank?

247
00:13:19,494 --> 00:13:22,429
They're filled with sedatives.

248
00:13:22,497 --> 00:13:26,228
You want to help me distribute them?
I'll make you my number two.

249
00:13:26,301 --> 00:13:29,634
You're not even in the contest anymore, bro. I certainly am.

250
00:13:29,704 --> 00:13:31,638
I have an inside horse.

251
00:13:31,706 --> 00:13:34,197
You see this homeless gentleman?

252
00:13:34,276 --> 00:13:36,210
He wins, I win.

253
00:13:36,278 --> 00:13:38,212
Come on, Mac. Join our crew.

254
00:13:38,280 --> 00:13:41,215
Shut up, you goddamn street rat! Keep working!

255
00:13:41,283 --> 00:13:44,218
You are on your way out.

256
00:13:44,286 --> 00:13:48,086
So you might as well go out with a bang and have some insurance.

257
00:13:48,156 --> 00:13:52,115
Okay, I'm in. But I don't know how much longer
I can last here. This thing's killing my back.

258
00:13:52,194 --> 00:13:54,128
I'll come up with a rig.

259
00:13:54,196 --> 00:13:56,858
Definitely. Shut up, street rat.

260
00:14:01,303 --> 00:14:04,966
Wow. He's getting pretty close to that pretty girl, huh?

261
00:14:05,040 --> 00:14:07,634
Yeah. You gotta make him jealous.

262
00:14:07,709 --> 00:14:10,644
I don't want to make him jealous. I want to win your bar.

263
00:14:10,712 --> 00:14:13,647
Oh. Okay. How do you think I could make him jealous?

264
00:14:13,715 --> 00:14:16,309
I'll tell you exactly what you need to do.
See that homeless guy?

265
00:14:16,384 --> 00:14:19,217
You gotta dance with him. That doesn't make any sense.

266
00:14:19,287 --> 00:14:22,984
It makes sense. You're tired.
I am, but I don't see how that makes sense.

267
00:14:23,058 --> 00:14:25,754
Okay, it's reverse psychology. No, it's not.

268
00:14:25,827 --> 00:14:28,261
You know what? I'm his sister.

269
00:14:28,330 --> 00:14:31,265
I know him really well. I know him a lot better than you.

270
00:14:31,333 --> 00:14:34,268
The only way you're gonna be able to land Dennis...

271
00:14:34,336 --> 00:14:39,433
is by making him feel he's lower on your
list than a disgusting, filthy homeless guy.

272
00:14:43,745 --> 00:14:47,476
I'm gonna go grind a homeless guy. Good girl. Make it dirty.

273
00:14:54,656 --> 00:14:58,956
Oh, my God! She's really, like, grinding away over there!

274
00:14:59,027 --> 00:15:01,860
Eat your heart out, Dennis Reynolds!

275
00:15:01,930 --> 00:15:04,865
Hey. Hey, pretty lady? Look, can you do me a favor?

276
00:15:04,933 --> 00:15:08,801
Can you prop your leg up and, like, grind on me all sexual like?

277
00:15:08,870 --> 00:15:12,567
Charlie's over there blowing up my spot with that girl.

278
00:15:12,641 --> 00:15:16,133
Oh, yeah. He is blowing up your spot. I know.

279
00:15:16,211 --> 00:15:18,577
Better make some moves to get her back.

280
00:15:18,647 --> 00:15:21,844
I'm gonna make some moves like a ranked number two guy would.

281
00:15:21,917 --> 00:15:24,647
You're number two. What's up, bitches?

282
00:15:24,719 --> 00:15:27,051
Oh! Why are you dancing so strangely?

283
00:15:27,122 --> 00:15:31,058
Because of all my energy.
I got tons of energy now because of this.

284
00:15:31,126 --> 00:15:34,391
Energy bar. Have some. Looks like a shit ball.

285
00:15:34,462 --> 00:15:36,396
No! That's an energy bar!

286
00:15:36,464 --> 00:15:39,399
Why is it so heavy and big?
Because it's filled with vitamins and shit.

287
00:15:39,467 --> 00:15:42,800
Come on, guys. Just eat it and you'll
have a burst of energy. Trust me.

288
00:15:42,871 --> 00:15:45,806
Don't eat it, Dee! It's filled with cough medicine.

289
00:15:45,874 --> 00:15:47,808
I love you! You traitor bastard!

290
00:15:47,876 --> 00:15:50,310
Okay, that's it, Cricket. You're out
of the crew. You're my whole life.

291
00:15:50,378 --> 00:15:52,710
I love you. I ain't going out without a fight!

292
00:15:52,781 --> 00:15:54,715
Don't leave me in the sun. I'll burn.

293
00:15:54,783 --> 00:15:57,445
You are in cahoots with those guys?

294
00:15:57,519 --> 00:15:59,453
I'm not in cahoots with anybody!

295
00:15:59,521 --> 00:16:02,012
You've been cahooting with them! I have not been cahooting!

296
00:16:02,090 --> 00:16:04,558
You're wearing Rickety Cricket's exoskeleton right now!

297
00:16:04,626 --> 00:16:06,253
I am not! Yes, you are!

298
00:16:06,328 --> 00:16:09,923
Okay! Okay! So I'm wearing it.

299
00:16:09,998 --> 00:16:12,023
You are pathetic. Oh, am I, Dee?

300
00:16:12,100 --> 00:16:14,091
Is this pathetic?

301
00:16:14,169 --> 00:16:18,936
What are you doing, bro? What,
man? A man can't enjoy a sexual lady?

302
00:16:19,007 --> 00:16:21,737
Not when it's with my partner.
I'm cutting in. Get out of here! Back off!

303
00:16:21,810 --> 00:16:24,244
I need her, man! Why do you need her?

304
00:16:24,312 --> 00:16:28,908
I need her, all right? Just put it that way.
You leave me no choice, Charlie.

305
00:16:30,185 --> 00:16:32,278
Hey, asshole. Whatever. Wanna dance?

306
00:16:32,354 --> 00:16:34,413
Yes! Good.

307
00:16:34,489 --> 00:16:36,252
Good, good. Take a load off.

308
00:16:36,324 --> 00:16:40,283
Let these strong, sweet, sexual arms hold you. So strong.

309
00:16:40,362 --> 00:16:43,126
I gotcha. So strong. All right, night-night.

310
00:16:43,198 --> 00:16:44,722
No!

311
00:16:44,799 --> 00:16:46,733
You made me do that.

312
00:16:46,801 --> 00:16:48,132
You piece of shit. Yeah, maybe.

313
00:16:48,203 --> 00:16:49,761
You piece of shit!

314
00:16:49,838 --> 00:16:51,897
Dennis Reynolds, I trusted you!

315
00:16:51,973 --> 00:16:55,136
Why? You are the biggest piece of shit on the planet!

316
00:16:55,210 --> 00:16:58,304
That's it. I'm taking this one out. I'm going limp.

317
00:16:58,380 --> 00:16:59,972
No, Charlie. Don't go limp.

318
00:17:00,048 --> 00:17:02,778
I got you, Gloria. You're hurting me!

319
00:17:02,851 --> 00:17:06,719
Charlie, don't do this. He's trying to have sex with you.

320
00:17:06,788 --> 00:17:09,723
What? I'm not gonna have sex with you! What do you mean?

321
00:17:09,791 --> 00:17:11,725
I'm engaged!

322
00:17:11,793 --> 00:17:14,318
Engaged is just a word. It doesn't have any meaning.

323
00:17:14,396 --> 00:17:16,455
No, it's a very serious word. Thank you!

324
00:17:16,531 --> 00:17:18,761
I was getting somewhere, wasn't I? No, you weren't.

325
00:17:18,833 --> 00:17:20,733
Really? No!

326
00:17:20,802 --> 00:17:22,736
All right. Well, see you later.

327
00:17:26,374 --> 00:17:29,104
You really are the biggest piece of shit on the planet.

328
00:17:29,177 --> 00:17:32,738
You still talking to me? I thought you were out. Dick!

329
00:17:32,814 --> 00:17:35,578
Don't worry, ma'am, 'cause I'm about to take this sucker out!

330
00:17:35,650 --> 00:17:37,641
You're gonna take me out? You bet.

331
00:17:37,719 --> 00:17:40,517
How are you gonna do that? This right here. DJ Fat Michael!

332
00:17:40,588 --> 00:17:42,522
Yo! Squirrely D? Oh, yeah!

333
00:17:42,590 --> 00:17:45,821
Please play my dance for a dance challenge.
That's a cando, my brother.

334
00:17:45,894 --> 00:17:49,352
Let me tell you a lesson. The cream always rises to the top.

335
00:17:49,431 --> 00:17:52,923
And I'm about to show you the white-hot
cream of an eighth-grade boy.

336
00:17:53,001 --> 00:17:54,832
Oh, my God. Play the tape.

337
00:18:00,709 --> 00:18:02,700
You gotta be kidding me.

338
00:18:08,783 --> 00:18:10,876
Watching every motion

339
00:18:10,952 --> 00:18:15,048
In my foolish lovers game

340
00:18:18,793 --> 00:18:20,818
On this endless ocean

341
00:18:20,895 --> 00:18:25,764
Finally lovers know no shame

342
00:18:26,768 --> 00:18:28,702
It was like a ballet.

343
00:18:28,770 --> 00:18:30,704
How did he remember that choreography? It was 20 years ago.

344
00:18:30,772 --> 00:18:32,899
I don't know. It was beautiful, man.

345
00:18:32,974 --> 00:18:36,171
What's going on, monkeys? Yeah. How are those kegs treating ya?

346
00:18:36,244 --> 00:18:38,644
Pretty good. What you munching on, pal?

347
00:18:38,713 --> 00:18:41,181
Energy ball, courtesy of my partner here.

348
00:18:41,249 --> 00:18:44,377
You look pretty woozy there, buddy. I'm feeling woozy...

349
00:18:44,452 --> 00:18:47,512
What is it? Wait. What is up, man? I feel like I'm tripping.

350
00:18:47,589 --> 00:18:50,524
Oh, Charlie, that might be the cough medicine.

351
00:18:50,592 --> 00:18:54,323
You got about 15 minutes until you drop like a ton of bricks.

352
00:18:55,296 --> 00:18:57,230
Holy shit! Did you play me?

353
00:18:57,298 --> 00:18:59,232
Oh, I played you. I played you good.

354
00:18:59,300 --> 00:19:02,827
Maybe now you two jerks might want to
start treating me with a little respect.

355
00:19:02,904 --> 00:19:04,895
Why would we show you respect? Yeah, why?

356
00:19:04,973 --> 00:19:08,374
Because I masterminded this entire situation.

357
00:19:08,443 --> 00:19:11,708
Not only did I get Charlie to eat a drug filled brownie...

358
00:19:11,780 --> 00:19:14,214
I got everybody in here to do it.

359
00:19:14,282 --> 00:19:19,083
Pretty soon, people are gonna be dropping like flies,
and it's gonna be me and you two jerks.

360
00:19:19,154 --> 00:19:21,748
Good luck with those kegs, boners.

361
00:19:21,823 --> 00:19:25,919
Bitch! There is enough cough
medicine in there to kill a gorilla.

362
00:19:25,994 --> 00:19:28,929
If you keep eating it, you're not gonna last five minutes.

363
00:19:28,997 --> 00:19:32,228
Bro, I can handle my sedatives.

364
00:19:39,974 --> 00:19:43,569
I cannot believe how long Charlie has
lasted after eating that brownie.

365
00:19:43,645 --> 00:19:47,411
Karate... snow machine... chop set...

366
00:19:47,482 --> 00:19:51,145
What's with the chopping? I'm chopping all over my action.

367
00:19:51,219 --> 00:19:53,153
And mostly power.

368
00:19:53,221 --> 00:19:55,621
He's lost his damn mind. My back's killing me.

369
00:19:55,690 --> 00:19:58,784
Break me off a piece of that exoskeleton.
It doesn't work that way.

370
00:19:58,860 --> 00:20:01,294
You can't just break off a piece of an exoskeleton.

371
00:20:01,362 --> 00:20:04,297
Give me some of that liquid hydraulic shit! No, man! Hey!

372
00:20:04,365 --> 00:20:06,833
It's a sensitive science! Don't use your elbows!

373
00:20:06,901 --> 00:20:09,495
Whoa! Whoa! Dennis, what are you doing?

374
00:20:09,571 --> 00:20:12,131
Oh, goddamn it!

375
00:20:12,207 --> 00:20:15,142
Ohh! Double whammy! Are you happy? Dee's gonna win.

376
00:20:15,210 --> 00:20:17,303
No. We still got Charlie.

377
00:20:20,315 --> 00:20:24,979
Don't worry about it. I got an inside horse...
Larry. That's my inside horse.

378
00:20:25,053 --> 00:20:27,681
Larry! Stay awake! Go, Larry!

379
00:20:27,755 --> 00:20:31,657
He's staying up! Come on,
Larry! You can do It! You can do It, Larry!

380
00:20:31,726 --> 00:20:34,695
You feeling bad? That's too bad.
'Cause I'm just getting my second wind.

381
00:20:34,762 --> 00:20:37,026
Cricket! Now!

382
00:20:37,098 --> 00:20:39,794
Here I come, Dee! I love you so much!

383
00:20:41,469 --> 00:20:45,496
Oh, my God, my knee! Oh, my God!

384
00:20:45,573 --> 00:20:48,371
Larry! You won the bar for us!

385
00:20:48,443 --> 00:20:51,105
Larry wins! Whoo! All right, Larry!

386
00:20:51,179 --> 00:20:53,113
I have a shattered kneecap!

387
00:20:53,181 --> 00:20:55,206
Dee, we can start again. Right?

388
00:20:55,283 --> 00:20:58,719
Never talk to me again, you goddamn street rat!

389
00:20:59,954 --> 00:21:02,013
Look on the bright side, Deandra.

390
00:21:02,090 --> 00:21:04,888
At least you're not ranked last anymore.

391
00:21:04,959 --> 00:21:07,553
Who's last now? Charlie.

392
00:21:07,629 --> 00:21:12,657
That kid really needs to learn how to read.