1
00:00:01,835 --> 00:00:02,534
♪ ♪
2
00:00:02,536 --> 00:00:07,406
The only way that my dad
is not going to kill us is if
he thinks we're already dead.
3
00:00:07,408 --> 00:00:10,109
- [ Dee ] What is that?
- A glory hole.
4
00:00:10,111 --> 00:00:11,510
A hole to stick your dick in?
5
00:00:11,512 --> 00:00:13,545
What is the password?
Orgy.
6
00:00:13,547 --> 00:00:17,783
I'm gonna gun this car
as fast as it goes
directly into that wall.
7
00:00:17,785 --> 00:00:19,351
[ Tires Screech ]
8
00:00:19,353 --> 00:00:24,189
According to the
Philadelphia Police Department,
Mac and Charlie are dead.
9
00:00:24,191 --> 00:00:25,591
I can't believe
they're dead.
10
00:00:25,593 --> 00:00:30,763
- You got any plans
for the outside?
- I got some big plans.
11
00:01:02,695 --> 00:01:05,564
♪♪ [ Classical ]
12
00:01:05,566 --> 00:01:09,568
Um, okay.
Well, I guess this is probably--
this is probably gonna be it.
13
00:01:09,570 --> 00:01:16,708
So, we should get started.
Uh, what to say about Mac.
14
00:01:16,710 --> 00:01:20,813
Um, he certainly was...
15
00:01:21,381 --> 00:01:22,314
angry.
16
00:01:22,316 --> 00:01:24,750
- Burn the duster!
- I'm not burning the duster!
17
00:01:24,752 --> 00:01:28,454
Okay?
I'm not burning the duster.
All right? That's crazy.
18
00:01:28,456 --> 00:01:32,458
That's like-- That's insane.
Why would I ever burn--
I mean, come on.
19
00:01:32,460 --> 00:01:36,295
I will continue to wear it
in his honor. And I will
burn some other things.
20
00:01:36,297 --> 00:01:39,264
You know, maybe like
these stupid, goddamn
sleeveless T-shirts...
21
00:01:39,266 --> 00:01:42,401
that he wants "retired"
and hung up in the bar,
I'll burn these.
22
00:01:42,403 --> 00:01:44,903
But I am not burning
the duster, okay?
So forget it.
23
00:01:44,905 --> 00:01:48,273
It probably won't even burn
anyway. It's not supposed to.
It's flame-retardant.
24
00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:51,810
That's like the whole point.
It's like a shield of armor.
25
00:01:51,812 --> 00:01:57,149
So stop asking me
to burn the duster.
I'm not gonna burn it!
26
00:01:58,718 --> 00:02:01,920
So, end of story.
You know?
27
00:02:01,922 --> 00:02:03,789
Let's just move on.
28
00:02:03,791 --> 00:02:06,658
♪♪ [ Classical Continues ]
29
00:02:06,660 --> 00:02:08,594
Okay?
30
00:02:09,929 --> 00:02:13,465
So, yeah.
31
00:02:13,467 --> 00:02:15,567
All right.
Well, uh, thank you.
32
00:02:20,773 --> 00:02:23,675
Come on.
No. I'm not doing it.
33
00:02:23,677 --> 00:02:24,943
Come on!
No!
34
00:02:24,945 --> 00:02:28,280
Deandra, get on that stage!
35
00:02:28,915 --> 00:02:32,518
Before Mac and Charlie died,
they made a slide show.
36
00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:37,556
And, uh, we're gonna play a song
that was a favorite of theirs.
37
00:02:37,558 --> 00:02:39,525
Go ahead.
Yeah.
38
00:02:39,527 --> 00:02:42,895
[ Man ]
♪ It's all the same ♪
39
00:02:42,897 --> 00:02:45,931
♪ Only the names will change ♪
40
00:02:45,933 --> 00:02:48,433
♪ Every day ♪
41
00:02:48,435 --> 00:02:52,404
♪ It seems we're wasting away ♪
42
00:02:52,406 --> 00:02:55,507
♪ Another place ♪
43
00:02:55,509 --> 00:02:59,344
♪ Where the faces are so cold ♪
44
00:02:59,346 --> 00:03:01,747
♪ I drive all night ♪
45
00:03:01,749 --> 00:03:05,484
♪ Just to get back home ♪
46
00:03:05,486 --> 00:03:08,487
♪ I'm a cowboy ♪
47
00:03:08,489 --> 00:03:12,257
♪ On a steel horse I ride ♪
48
00:03:12,259 --> 00:03:14,860
♪ I'm wanted ♪
49
00:03:14,928 --> 00:03:19,398
♪ Dead or alive ♪
[ Frank ]
I'm gonna miss you, Charlie.
50
00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:21,967
[ Mac ]
This is bullshit, dude.
No one's mourning me properly.
51
00:03:21,969 --> 00:03:23,936
What are you
talking about, man?
There's nobody here.
52
00:03:23,938 --> 00:03:25,804
Your mom's sitting
right there, man.
She's mourning you.
53
00:03:25,806 --> 00:03:29,975
Yeah.
She watched an entire episode of
Mama's Family and fell asleep.
54
00:03:29,977 --> 00:03:32,544
- Yeah.
- And now I'm gonna give
them the one-gun salute.
55
00:03:32,546 --> 00:03:35,647
No, no, no, no.
No, you're not.
Okay. All right. I got it.
56
00:03:35,649 --> 00:03:37,783
Oh, my God! Let go!
57
00:03:37,785 --> 00:03:40,619
Wow. That was great
and very touching.
58
00:03:40,621 --> 00:03:43,689
Thanks so much for coming,
both of you.
59
00:03:43,691 --> 00:03:46,291
- Time to go.
See you at the next one.
- [ Grunts ]
60
00:03:46,293 --> 00:03:50,629
Bonnie, Bonnie, Bonnie.
[ Sighs ]
It's gonna... be okay.
61
00:03:50,631 --> 00:03:54,800
Tell you what. Why don't you
go into the bathroom,
go into the center stall.
62
00:03:54,802 --> 00:03:58,470
I got a little surprise for you.
It's gonna cheer you up.
63
00:03:58,472 --> 00:04:02,774
That's okay, Frankie.
I don't need to go potty.
64
00:04:02,776 --> 00:04:05,477
No?
65
00:04:05,479 --> 00:04:08,413
Oh, damn it.
66
00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:09,514
[ Exhales ]
Wow.
67
00:04:09,516 --> 00:04:13,051
Can you believe it, Sis?
They're actually gone.
This changes everything.
68
00:04:13,053 --> 00:04:14,920
I need a ride home.
Ooh. Ooh, ooh, ooh.
69
00:04:14,922 --> 00:04:17,789
No, no, no.
Can't do that, Sis.
Gotta get back home A.S.A.P.
70
00:04:17,791 --> 00:04:20,659
I'm meeting a couple of
potential new roommates.
Hot ones.
71
00:04:20,661 --> 00:04:23,061
You know what I'm saying?
[ Chuckles ]
All right.
72
00:04:23,063 --> 00:04:26,765
Hey, it's time to move on.
73
00:04:36,409 --> 00:04:38,343
[ Panting ]
74
00:04:38,345 --> 00:04:41,813
Would you mind not breathing
directly into my mouth?
75
00:04:43,049 --> 00:04:46,585
No thoughts on that?
You're not gonna say anything?
76
00:04:46,587 --> 00:04:49,921
You're just gonna stare at me?
That's what you're bringing
to the table.
77
00:04:49,923 --> 00:04:54,826
That's great.
I'm gonna--
Could you excuse me?
78
00:04:54,828 --> 00:04:58,730
Excuse me. Just for a second.
Thank you. Okay.
79
00:04:58,732 --> 00:05:01,867
Excuse-- Excuse me.
80
00:05:03,436 --> 00:05:04,770
Sir. Goddamn.
81
00:05:04,772 --> 00:05:07,406
Thanks. I'm just gonna--
Excuse me.
82
00:05:07,408 --> 00:05:10,008
Excuse me. I'm just gonna--
Okay.
83
00:05:10,010 --> 00:05:12,778
Of course, let me do it.
84
00:05:13,846 --> 00:05:14,946
Thanks.
85
00:05:14,948 --> 00:05:19,851
Hi. Oh, my God.
It's a freak show back there.
86
00:05:19,853 --> 00:05:23,088
Ma'am, I'm gonna need for you
to step behind the line.
Yeah, look.
87
00:05:23,090 --> 00:05:24,690
As you can probably tell,
I'm not really a "bus person."
88
00:05:24,692 --> 00:05:29,428
It's just a couple of dicks
destroyed my car and forced me
to lower myself to this.
89
00:05:29,430 --> 00:05:31,930
So, if you could just
cut me some slack because...
90
00:05:31,932 --> 00:05:34,533
I don't know if
you've been back there,
but animals.
91
00:05:34,535 --> 00:05:36,668
You're touching me.
This isn't weird for you?
92
00:05:36,670 --> 00:05:39,738
Ma'am, either
you get behind the line
or your ride ends here.
93
00:05:39,740 --> 00:05:41,773
I'm behind the line.
You're on the line.
94
00:05:41,775 --> 00:05:44,009
On the line, behind the line,
who cares?
95
00:05:44,011 --> 00:05:46,678
That's it.
I'm pulling the bus over.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
96
00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:50,482
Goddamn it!
Don't pull the bus over.
Really?
97
00:05:50,484 --> 00:05:51,116
Okay, fine. You know what?
98
00:05:51,118 --> 00:05:54,419
I will go back
behind the line with the rest
of the filthy degenerates.
99
00:05:54,421 --> 00:05:58,857
But I am not happy about it,
lady. Excuse me!
100
00:05:58,859 --> 00:06:01,126
Oh, my God. Really?
Oh, my God.
101
00:06:01,128 --> 00:06:02,527
Oh, no. You stay put.
I'll get it.
102
00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:07,699
I'm on the floor of a bus.
On the floor of a filthy bus.
Excuse me for just a second!
103
00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:11,703
Damn it. I can't believe
Dee finally caught on
and canceled her credit card.
104
00:06:11,705 --> 00:06:14,473
This is really not good, dude.
Now we don't have any beans.
105
00:06:14,475 --> 00:06:16,641
We don't have any beer.
We're shit out of luck.
Tell you what.
106
00:06:16,643 --> 00:06:19,678
We'll get back
to the bar, get beer there.
At least we'll have that.
107
00:06:19,680 --> 00:06:21,680
That's not a bad idea.
In the meantime,
I need a popper.
108
00:06:21,682 --> 00:06:26,151
I gotta get my head straight.
I got bad news on the popper
front. This is the last one.
109
00:06:26,153 --> 00:06:27,185
Shit. Really?
Yeah.
110
00:06:27,187 --> 00:06:31,556
All right. Well, I think
I should get it.
No.
111
00:06:31,558 --> 00:06:32,991
I gotta--
Not going to happen.
112
00:06:32,993 --> 00:06:35,160
Can I just have it?
Can I just have it?
Bro.
113
00:06:35,162 --> 00:06:36,995
Will you let me
do the poppers?
I just want it.
114
00:06:36,997 --> 00:06:40,799
I just need it, dude.
Will you let me
be the popper person?
115
00:06:40,801 --> 00:06:44,202
Give me the popper, dude!
I need that popper!
116
00:06:44,204 --> 00:06:46,838
I gotta have the popper!
117
00:06:49,142 --> 00:06:52,844
Oh, you son of a bitches!
Hey, look out!
118
00:06:52,846 --> 00:06:54,713
Look out!
119
00:06:54,715 --> 00:06:56,481
Hey! Hey!
120
00:06:56,483 --> 00:06:58,150
[ Banging Window ]
Hey, you jerks!
121
00:06:58,152 --> 00:07:00,852
Goddamn it!
Move out of the way!
122
00:07:00,854 --> 00:07:02,988
Hey, no! Stop the bus!
Stop the bus!
123
00:07:02,990 --> 00:07:05,957
[ Woman ]
Shut up, stupid!
You shut up, bitch!
124
00:07:05,959 --> 00:07:07,225
Stop the bus!
I need--
125
00:07:07,227 --> 00:07:11,530
Sir. Sir.
I need to pull the cord to get
off the bus. This is my stop.
126
00:07:11,532 --> 00:07:14,199
You're in my way.
Can you get out of the way
so I can pull the cord?
127
00:07:14,201 --> 00:07:18,637
I'll get out of your way as soon
as I get off-- Oh, my God.
What is wrong with you?
128
00:07:18,639 --> 00:07:21,840
Goddamn it, you bitches!
129
00:07:25,111 --> 00:07:28,113
[ Gasps ]
130
00:07:30,950 --> 00:07:33,685
I hate the bus.
131
00:07:39,959 --> 00:07:42,861
Good-bye, Mac's shit.
Good-bye, Mac's shit.
132
00:07:42,863 --> 00:07:46,198
Good-bye, Mac's shit.
Good-bye, Mac--
133
00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:49,034
Come on, dude.
When were you ever
gonna use nunchakus?
134
00:07:49,036 --> 00:07:53,605
Are you kidding me?
Jesus Christ.
[ Knocks ]
135
00:07:53,607 --> 00:07:56,775
Uh, yeah.
Hang on one second.
136
00:07:58,144 --> 00:08:00,645
All right.
137
00:08:00,647 --> 00:08:02,848
Yeah, it's perfect.
138
00:08:02,850 --> 00:08:04,249
Pow. Hello.
Oh.
139
00:08:04,251 --> 00:08:06,218
Uh, hi.
Um, can I help you?
140
00:08:06,220 --> 00:08:09,554
[ German Accent ]
You're looking for
a roommate, right?
141
00:08:09,556 --> 00:08:12,924
Uh, yeah. Yeah, I was looking
for two, actually. Female?
142
00:08:12,926 --> 00:08:15,093
I believe I was pretty clear
in the ad here.
143
00:08:15,095 --> 00:08:17,896
"Male, 30, looking for
Three's Company type deal.
144
00:08:17,898 --> 00:08:20,699
Did Odd Couple thing
for past decade.
Looking for something new."
145
00:08:20,701 --> 00:08:22,734
Yeah. I did the
Three's Company thing once.
Oh, yeah?
146
00:08:22,736 --> 00:08:26,671
It was pretty cool,
for like a week. And then
I banged one of them.
147
00:08:26,673 --> 00:08:27,906
Oh. Nice.
Not nice.
148
00:08:27,908 --> 00:08:31,576
Do you know what this is
like, banging a chick
that you live with?
149
00:08:31,578 --> 00:08:33,111
It's terrible, man.
Bah-bah-bah.
150
00:08:33,113 --> 00:08:36,314
Every day you have
to deal with this.
Bah-bah-bah-bah-bah.
151
00:08:36,316 --> 00:08:38,917
[ Spits ]
"Get out, lady."
Hmm, yeah. Yeah.
152
00:08:38,919 --> 00:08:41,319
Wow, yeah. I guess
I never really thought
about that before.
153
00:08:41,321 --> 00:08:44,756
You know, you're much smarter
than my old roommate.
154
00:08:44,758 --> 00:08:47,859
Yeah, look.
I'm gonna be up front
with you.
155
00:08:47,861 --> 00:08:50,562
I run with
a pretty wild crew.
156
00:08:50,564 --> 00:08:53,598
There's probably gonna be chicks
over here, like, all the time.
157
00:08:53,600 --> 00:08:56,735
Yeah?
I'm into some
pretty crazy shit.
158
00:08:56,737 --> 00:08:58,336
[ Laughs ]
Here's the best part.
159
00:08:58,338 --> 00:09:00,639
I don't even know
most of their names.
Oh.
160
00:09:00,641 --> 00:09:03,108
Mm-mmm.
Yes, it's like--
Wow, yeah.
161
00:09:03,110 --> 00:09:07,045
I've been trying to get into
the anonymous sex thing lately.
Oh, yeah?
162
00:09:07,047 --> 00:09:09,648
Now are you, uh, European?
163
00:09:09,650 --> 00:09:12,584
Oh, I'm sorry.
What gave it away?
164
00:09:12,586 --> 00:09:13,685
[ Both Laugh ]
165
00:09:13,687 --> 00:09:15,420
Nice. Yeah, well--
You know,
166
00:09:15,422 --> 00:09:19,791
I could probably consider
like a Perfect Strangers
type of deal.
167
00:09:19,793 --> 00:09:21,159
Hmm?
Look.
168
00:09:21,161 --> 00:09:24,696
I like this by the way.
This is a sweet duster.
169
00:09:30,770 --> 00:09:34,272
First he doesn't burn
the duster, and now he's
looking for new roommates?
170
00:09:34,274 --> 00:09:35,974
Why did you want to burn
that duster anyway?
171
00:09:35,976 --> 00:09:38,944
Because he always
wears it with no shirt
and a shit load of cologne.
172
00:09:38,946 --> 00:09:41,079
- It's totally ruined.
- Hello, bitches!
173
00:09:41,081 --> 00:09:42,180
Jesus Christ, Dee!
Whoa!
174
00:09:42,182 --> 00:09:44,182
You scared the shit out of me.
I almost dropped all my beer.
175
00:09:44,184 --> 00:09:47,886
I knew you two weren't dead.
What are you doing
popping out of our tent?
176
00:09:47,888 --> 00:09:49,854
Not cool, Dee!
Oh, not cool?
177
00:09:49,856 --> 00:09:53,058
I'll tell you what's not cool.
Crashing my car into a building,
178
00:09:53,060 --> 00:09:53,959
exploding a grenade
inside of it,
179
00:09:53,961 --> 00:09:57,062
and then convincing
your friends and your
family that you're dead.
180
00:09:57,064 --> 00:10:00,832
That's one of the cooler things
you could ever do.
Unbelievably cool.
181
00:10:00,834 --> 00:10:03,702
I suggest you try it.
Cooler than I originally
thought it was.
182
00:10:03,704 --> 00:10:06,338
I don't know why you're
up here doing whatever.
And I don't care.
183
00:10:06,340 --> 00:10:09,441
What I do care about
is my 1997 Dodge Neon.
So here's the deal.
184
00:10:09,443 --> 00:10:13,144
You two monkeys are going
get me a new 1997 Dodge Neon.
185
00:10:13,146 --> 00:10:16,181
Or I'm going to tell
Frank and Dennis that you
faked your own deaths...
186
00:10:16,183 --> 00:10:17,482
and you're hiding
up on the roof.
187
00:10:17,484 --> 00:10:22,087
Now you're just talking crazy.
You can't buy
a new 1997 Dodge Neon.
188
00:10:22,089 --> 00:10:24,623
You can't buy a new one
unless you had a time machine.
189
00:10:24,625 --> 00:10:25,790
New to me.
Dee, you got
bigger problems.
190
00:10:25,792 --> 00:10:29,127
Because my dad
just got out of jail,
and he's coming to kill you.
191
00:10:29,129 --> 00:10:30,962
What? Me? Are you sure?
Yeah.
192
00:10:30,964 --> 00:10:33,965
Kill you, kill us,
kill everybody really.
He's gonna kill everyone.
193
00:10:33,967 --> 00:10:36,267
Why would you not tell
me this news earlier?
Oh, my God.
194
00:10:36,269 --> 00:10:40,105
Get off our case, Dee.
What's done is done.
Mac and I are hobo drifters now.
195
00:10:40,107 --> 00:10:43,241
- We don't dwell on the past.
- Hobo drifters live
in the present.
196
00:10:43,243 --> 00:10:47,112
If you really want to
get back at Frank and Dennis,
you gotta fake your own death.
197
00:10:47,114 --> 00:10:51,082
I don't want to get back
at Frank and Dennis!
I want to get back at you two!
198
00:10:51,084 --> 00:10:54,319
Really?
Is that what your plan was?
Yes!
199
00:10:54,321 --> 00:10:56,087
I tuned out during
the whole tirade.
200
00:10:56,089 --> 00:10:58,456
The 1997 Dodge Neon thing--
It threw you for a loop?
201
00:10:58,458 --> 00:11:00,759
No, come on!
I tell you what.
Here's the plan.
202
00:11:00,761 --> 00:11:02,193
Why don't you fake
your own death like us?
Yes.
203
00:11:02,195 --> 00:11:05,096
It really is the only thing
you can do now 'cause
you're in this too deep.
204
00:11:05,098 --> 00:11:07,932
Look, you want to die?
Okay.
205
00:11:07,934 --> 00:11:10,769
Now, what's
your bean situation?
206
00:11:10,771 --> 00:11:14,706
Yeah.
You got some beans on you?
Or what's up?
207
00:11:24,884 --> 00:11:27,152
Good-bye, Son.
208
00:11:32,425 --> 00:11:34,959
[ Chuckles ]
209
00:11:36,862 --> 00:11:39,464
♪♪ [ Dance Rock ]
210
00:11:39,466 --> 00:11:42,834
Hey, Jan.
Oh, man, I gotta tell you,
this is awesome.
211
00:11:42,836 --> 00:11:45,336
It's making me forget that Mac
ever even died.
Oh, yeah.
212
00:11:45,338 --> 00:11:47,906
Just relax, roommate.
I'm gonna relax.
213
00:11:47,908 --> 00:11:52,043
I'm gonna relax all over
the place in a second.
[ Knocks ]
214
00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:53,378
What?
215
00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:56,047
Oh, shit. Jan?
[ Knocks ]
216
00:11:56,049 --> 00:11:58,817
All righty.
I gotta get this.
217
00:11:59,885 --> 00:12:00,919
Hey, Dennis.
Really? What do you want?
218
00:12:00,921 --> 00:12:04,489
Wanted to let you know
I was gonna go for a quick jog
in Fairmont Park by myself.
219
00:12:04,491 --> 00:12:06,491
Great. Okay. Have fun.
It's kind of dangerous.
220
00:12:06,493 --> 00:12:09,260
I got it, Dee. Go jogging!
I'm not wearing
anything reflective.
221
00:12:09,262 --> 00:12:12,030
What does it have to do with me?
Just go jog!
Just me out there...
222
00:12:12,032 --> 00:12:15,433
in the middle of the night
by myself.
Goddamn it!
223
00:12:15,435 --> 00:12:19,304
Sorry about her.
She's a bag lady.
I hate her.
224
00:12:19,306 --> 00:12:23,041
Whoa, Dennis! Which one
do you want first, huh?
225
00:12:23,043 --> 00:12:24,943
Greta or Sasha?
Oh, shit!
226
00:12:24,945 --> 00:12:28,213
Why'd you do that, bro?
Come here, man.
What did I do?
227
00:12:28,215 --> 00:12:32,417
You said their names.
Oh, come on, man.
That kills it for me.
228
00:12:32,419 --> 00:12:34,052
Look, bro.
Can I be honest with you?
229
00:12:34,054 --> 00:12:36,921
This is great,
but I was really hoping
for more of like...
230
00:12:36,923 --> 00:12:40,859
an anything-goes,
crazy, European, sex-party
kind of a thing.
231
00:12:40,861 --> 00:12:43,428
Something a little kinkier?
Kinky? Yeah.
232
00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:46,064
Oh, yeah.
Kinky.
Yeah, yeah, I like this.
233
00:12:46,066 --> 00:12:48,199
You like this.
We both, we like this.
234
00:12:48,201 --> 00:12:51,102
Oh, oh! Yeah, let me
make some calls.
235
00:12:51,104 --> 00:12:53,104
You think you can put something
like that together?
236
00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:55,907
Of course I can.
I'm European.
Oh, man.
237
00:12:55,909 --> 00:12:57,142
Huh?
Oh!
238
00:12:57,144 --> 00:12:59,310
That's--
[ Hissing ]
239
00:12:59,312 --> 00:13:01,479
[ Both Laughing ]
240
00:13:01,481 --> 00:13:02,547
Wow.
Yeah.
241
00:13:02,549 --> 00:13:05,150
Looks like he's got
a lot of new friends.
Yes, I can see that.
242
00:13:05,152 --> 00:13:07,385
Some of them are
really pretty girls.
Yes, they are very pretty.
243
00:13:07,387 --> 00:13:10,555
Wow, that's tough, man.
That's a tough thing
to see, huh?
244
00:13:10,557 --> 00:13:14,492
Shut up, dude.
I'll bet you Frank
is throwing a party too.
245
00:13:14,494 --> 00:13:17,262
It's your turn to take
the bedpan out tonight.
246
00:13:17,264 --> 00:13:21,032
[ Imitating Charlie ]
No, no, Frank!
I did it last time!
247
00:13:21,034 --> 00:13:23,868
No, Charlie. I got up
in the middle of the night...
248
00:13:23,870 --> 00:13:26,905
and I walked down
the hallway with the bedpan.
249
00:13:26,907 --> 00:13:29,574
[ Imitating Charlie ]
All right, Frank!
I'll do it!
250
00:13:29,576 --> 00:13:33,611
Only because
I like you so much!
251
00:13:33,613 --> 00:13:36,347
[ Crying ]
I like you, too, Charlie.
252
00:13:36,349 --> 00:13:42,854
I like you, too, new Charlie.
New Charlie.
253
00:13:44,957 --> 00:13:48,493
You know what, man?
I'm kicking it up a notch.
We're haunting these bitches.
254
00:13:48,495 --> 00:13:50,595
- Haunting's cool, man.
- Boom! Coming back
from the grave, bitch.
255
00:13:50,597 --> 00:13:54,499
That's cool. What is this?
What are you doing?
Like Poltergeist or something?
256
00:13:54,501 --> 00:13:56,601
Awesome, right?
Craig T. Nelson!
No, not awesome.
257
00:13:56,603 --> 00:14:00,171
Craig T. Nelson is the best,
dude. But Poltergeist?
[ Blows Raspberry ]
258
00:14:00,173 --> 00:14:01,339
Why?
It's not scary.
259
00:14:01,341 --> 00:14:04,075
It's all about
psychological damage.
Big deal.
260
00:14:04,077 --> 00:14:05,610
Look at me.
Psychological damage up to here.
261
00:14:05,612 --> 00:14:09,948
Doesn't do anything for me.
Physical damage, that's what's
gonna irritate people.
262
00:14:09,950 --> 00:14:13,618
What do you suggest?
If anything, maybe we tie
some knives to our fingers,
263
00:14:13,620 --> 00:14:16,354
and we get a little more
serious about
this whole murder thing.
264
00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:19,958
Haunting. We're gonna haunt.
Haunting!
I was thinking "dead."
265
00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:23,595
You guys! I'm so happy
to see you! Oh, God!
I had the weirdest night!
266
00:14:23,597 --> 00:14:27,899
It was crazy! As soon
as I left Dennis's place,
I realized I don't have a car.
267
00:14:27,901 --> 00:14:30,501
So I do have to run
home through the park
in the middle of the night.
268
00:14:30,503 --> 00:14:33,471
So I'm on Spring Garden Street
and this big car full
of gangbangers--
269
00:14:33,473 --> 00:14:36,507
Gangbangers,
that is an awesome story, Dee!
That's the end of it, right?
270
00:14:36,509 --> 00:14:38,343
Charlie and I are right
in the middle of something.
271
00:14:38,345 --> 00:14:41,079
We're gonna put some knives
on our fingers
and start murdering people.
272
00:14:41,081 --> 00:14:42,780
- Haunting people.
We're gonna haunt people.
- Whatever.
273
00:14:42,782 --> 00:14:45,583
- You're gonna do like
a Poltergeist thing.
- Shh!
274
00:14:45,585 --> 00:14:47,619
[ People Laughing ]
It's Dennis.
275
00:14:47,621 --> 00:14:50,054
That's Dennis.
Back office.
276
00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:52,690
- [ Dennis ] All right!
- Oh, yeah.
277
00:14:52,692 --> 00:14:54,993
This is wunderbar!
Ladies!
278
00:14:54,995 --> 00:14:56,661
[ Dennis ]
Pop 'em off!
Start poppin' 'em off!
279
00:14:56,663 --> 00:15:01,599
I love it, I love it.
Hey, feel free to be free.
No American judgments here.
280
00:15:01,601 --> 00:15:04,669
The only rule is
don't tell me your names.
281
00:15:04,671 --> 00:15:06,604
I don't want to know
your names, okay?
282
00:15:06,606 --> 00:15:10,408
[ Imitating Charlie ]
Hi, I'm Charlie.
Oh, I love these girls!
283
00:15:10,410 --> 00:15:14,212
Frank! What are you doing, man?
You're freaking the girls out
with this mannequin.
284
00:15:14,214 --> 00:15:19,150
Get rid of it!
Dennis, these girls
are German.
285
00:15:19,152 --> 00:15:19,617
German!
286
00:15:19,619 --> 00:15:23,054
[ Imitating Charlie ]
We're gonna have demented sex,
right, Frank?
287
00:15:23,056 --> 00:15:25,356
- Yeah!
- ♪♪ [ Dance Rock ]
288
00:15:25,358 --> 00:15:27,392
That is the greatest party
I've ever seen.
These sons of bitches!
289
00:15:27,394 --> 00:15:31,529
Is he gonna take that stupid
little mannequin everywhere?
That is freaking me out!
290
00:15:31,531 --> 00:15:36,501
They're hanging out with
half-naked ladies and I just ran
and sweated for nothing?
291
00:15:36,503 --> 00:15:39,037
I don't sound like that.
Goddamn it! Get past it!
292
00:15:39,039 --> 00:15:41,572
Who cares about the mannequin?
I care about the mannequin!
293
00:15:41,574 --> 00:15:43,241
I look like a jerk
in front of those girls.
294
00:15:43,243 --> 00:15:45,143
I'm putting an end
to this right now.
Screw your dad.
295
00:15:45,145 --> 00:15:47,478
Let him eat our asses.
Let him eat my butt
into smithereens.
296
00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:50,715
I'm ending this.
Whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa.
297
00:15:50,717 --> 00:15:52,450
Let's not be rash.
I mean, come on.
298
00:15:52,452 --> 00:15:55,687
If we're not gonna haunt them,
we should have a little fun,
right?
299
00:15:55,689 --> 00:15:57,322
Let's scare the shit
out of them.
Yeah.
300
00:15:57,324 --> 00:16:02,026
- We gotta make an entrance.
- Oh, let's scare the shit
out of them.
301
00:16:02,028 --> 00:16:05,463
♪♪ [ Continues ]
302
00:16:07,399 --> 00:16:10,802
Dennis!
Jan, this is what I want, man.
303
00:16:10,804 --> 00:16:13,705
You've given me
what I want!
Ja. Shh, shh.
304
00:16:13,707 --> 00:16:17,608
Look, I have this very kinky
surprise for you, my friend.
Oh, yeah?
305
00:16:17,610 --> 00:16:22,580
Yeah. I've arranged
for you to use...
the glory hole!
306
00:16:22,582 --> 00:16:26,117
[ Laughs ]
I forgot about the glory hole.
Ja. Ja, ja, ja!
307
00:16:26,119 --> 00:16:28,219
I've just sent someone
in there now.
Yeah?
308
00:16:28,221 --> 00:16:32,657
Totally anonymous.
Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, oh!
309
00:16:32,659 --> 00:16:36,694
Jan, there are no words, man.
310
00:16:37,730 --> 00:16:41,299
That's right. I'm the boss.
But I'm a good boss.
311
00:16:41,301 --> 00:16:44,168
And I'm gonna allow you
to watch.
[ Door Opens ]
312
00:16:44,170 --> 00:16:46,137
[ Imitating Charlie ]
Okay, Frank, I--
313
00:16:46,139 --> 00:16:49,540
[ Door Closes ]
Shh! Somebody's coming.
314
00:16:49,542 --> 00:16:55,446
Any minute now, the German broad
is gonna knock on that wall,
315
00:16:55,448 --> 00:16:58,349
which is my signal
to go in my pants,
316
00:16:58,351 --> 00:17:02,253
take out my penis,
and stick it through the hole.
317
00:17:02,255 --> 00:17:04,222
[ Laughs ]
Then she can go to town!
318
00:17:04,224 --> 00:17:08,292
[ Dennis ] Hey, honey.
You want to take care of
this monster for me or what?
319
00:17:08,294 --> 00:17:12,597
There's no way I can picture
that is a girl.
Frank?
320
00:17:12,599 --> 00:17:16,234
- Dennis!
- What the hell are
you doing here, man?
321
00:17:16,236 --> 00:17:18,836
Jan sent me!
Jan sent me too!
322
00:17:18,838 --> 00:17:22,440
- This is bad.
- Everybody out!
323
00:17:22,442 --> 00:17:25,176
There has been
a major miscommunication!
324
00:17:25,178 --> 00:17:29,747
Get your European, sex, freaky
asses out of the bar. Let's go.
325
00:17:29,749 --> 00:17:32,583
Come on. Come on.
Move it. Move it.
That's right.
326
00:17:32,585 --> 00:17:35,319
Let's go, ladies.
Let's go, let's go, let's go.
Get out!
327
00:17:35,321 --> 00:17:38,456
Get out! Get out!
Get out! Get out!
Hey, you, too, Jan.
328
00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:40,525
Hey, beat it!
What did I do?
329
00:17:40,527 --> 00:17:44,395
What did you do?
Jan, you were gonna have him
glory hole me!
330
00:17:44,397 --> 00:17:46,431
Ja.
Yeah, my ass!
Get out of here!
331
00:17:46,433 --> 00:17:49,200
Are you kidding me?
You sex freak!
You Americans are so uptight!
332
00:17:49,202 --> 00:17:52,303
You ruined our glory hole.
Beat it. And shut the door.
333
00:17:52,305 --> 00:17:56,340
Sick freak. You didn't know
anything about that?
Weirdo. What?
334
00:17:57,176 --> 00:18:00,178
Kaboom!
Surprise, bitches!
335
00:18:00,180 --> 00:18:03,748
We're alive!
And it's blowing your minds
right now!
336
00:18:03,750 --> 00:18:05,183
[ Cackling ]
337
00:18:05,185 --> 00:18:08,586
It is not blowing
our minds at all.
I knew you guys were alive.
338
00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:12,390
- [ Mac, Dennis ] Huh?
- I knew you guys were
alive, okay?
339
00:18:12,392 --> 00:18:15,226
- I figured it out right
before the funeral.
- How?
340
00:18:15,228 --> 00:18:18,463
I could hear you guys rustling
around in the vents. You were
speaking at full volume.
341
00:18:18,465 --> 00:18:22,667
Did you think you were being
crafty? I could see you staring
at me through the window!
342
00:18:22,669 --> 00:18:25,403
I can see through my windows.
I wanted to piss you off.
343
00:18:25,405 --> 00:18:27,171
What about me?
Did you want to piss me off?
344
00:18:27,173 --> 00:18:29,874
Uh, you, I thought might've
actually been murdered.
345
00:18:29,876 --> 00:18:33,578
That's what I thought.
So hold on a second.
Frank, you knew too?
346
00:18:33,580 --> 00:18:36,614
Yeah. I knew.
347
00:18:37,349 --> 00:18:44,188
And some of the stuff you've
been doing with this mannequin
here, that's, like, um--
348
00:18:44,190 --> 00:18:46,824
to teach me a lesson, or--
349
00:18:46,826 --> 00:18:49,093
Yeah.
350
00:18:50,362 --> 00:18:52,363
Did I see you
bang that thing?
All right, you know what?
351
00:18:52,365 --> 00:18:56,934
Why were you guys pretending
that you were dead anyway?
That's a messed-up thing to do.
352
00:18:56,936 --> 00:18:59,871
My dad got out on parole
and he's coming to kill me
and Charlie.
353
00:18:59,873 --> 00:19:02,807
You got a letter the other day.
He sent a letter.
354
00:19:02,809 --> 00:19:05,843
- Who sent a letter?
- I got it. I got it.
It was sent to the bar.
355
00:19:05,845 --> 00:19:10,248
"Dear Son, I asked you
to leave me be."
Yada, yada, yada.
356
00:19:10,250 --> 00:19:15,586
"Forced me to do something that
I hoped I'd never have to do."
Oh, yeah. Here we go.
357
00:19:15,588 --> 00:19:18,356
"I just got out of prison
and I'm heading to Tijuana.
358
00:19:18,358 --> 00:19:23,761
"I wanted to get as far away
from you as I could so that I
could learn how to forgive you.
359
00:19:23,763 --> 00:19:27,632
"Please do not try
to contact me ever.
360
00:19:27,634 --> 00:19:30,501
"I promise that
I'm not gonna hurt you.
Love, Dad.
361
00:19:30,503 --> 00:19:32,770
P.S. I still love you."
362
00:19:32,772 --> 00:19:35,806
Hmm.
363
00:19:35,808 --> 00:19:38,376
Oops.
[ Both Laugh ]
364
00:19:38,378 --> 00:19:39,977
Because we--
This whole thing--
365
00:19:39,979 --> 00:19:43,281
- We didn't have
to do all the--
- Yeah, yeah.
366
00:19:43,283 --> 00:19:46,250
Sorry about your car, Dee.
367
00:19:46,752 --> 00:19:51,155
♪♪ [ People Singing In Spanish ]
368
00:19:59,498 --> 00:20:04,168
♪♪ [ Continues ]
369
00:20:26,592 --> 00:20:30,528
♪♪ [ Continues ]
370
00:20:35,834 --> 00:20:39,604
[ Voices Speaking Backwards ]