Can't just be me shortlisted for the co-deputy head role.
I'd rather poke my own eye out.
I'd like to recommend Coral for deputy head.
"Barbara Rafferty's funeral wishes."
I'm not asking you to pay for it all. I just need a lend.
Oh, here we go.
I can't do this by myself, Nick. I'm brassic.
Got you a cleaning job if you want it. Are you serious?
I don't have bullying at my school.
There are some things in life that you just can't control.
See him? I heard that's his lad.
Daddy's boy! Get lost!
Come here!
I met your fella properly. Wasted as a caretaker.
I might be able to find him something better.
Is that Nan's?
Oh, my God!
Well, it was in my house. What are you on about?
That's going to have to pay for the funeral.
Whoa, whoa, whoa! No, no, no...
Hey, let it go! Come on, come on!
You won't get away with this, you thieving cow!
Mr Savage messaged.
Reckons he's got a new role for me.
That's brilliant.
Hey, why didn't you tell me that you knew him?
He said that you and him go way back.
Well, I'd just lost me mam.
I mean, it wasn't the time to get out the yearbook.
Yeah, course not.
What the hell's going on here?
Dad, don't, no. They're not even in school.
Doesn't work like that.
They might not be in school, but I am.
Oi!
What do you think you two are doing?
Expressing ourselves.
Express yourselves in art class.
Give me them cans.
When you are wearing that uniform, you are representing Waterloo Road.
Now, get to school!
What a div, mate.
School! Now!
"School. Now."
THEY SCOFF
Oh, some last-minute cramming?
I think we did that this morning.
Oh!
THEY CHUCKLE
So, are you raring to go for this interview, then?
Ah, I think so.
Just picture it - me, a senior leader.
Oh, "Senior."
Something so masterful about the way you say it.
Ssseniorrr...
Rrrr! Oh!
THEY CHUCKLE
Oh-ho-ho!
What are you dressed like that for?
Like what?
Well, you...you know what.
All "you go, girl" type of thing.
I am going to get me a deputy headship.
You said you wouldn't dream of taking on extra responsibilities.
Yeah, but I would dream of a greatly reduced timetable...
..so why not?
May the best hottie win.
You can wiggle about in that very tight skirt as much as you want...
..but this job is mine.
HE CHUCKLES
Big day today. Trying out coaching for the first time.
So...are you nervous?
Yeah. Yeah, I'm terrified.
Oh, don't be daft.
Steve wouldn't have asked you cover
if he didn't think you were up to it, would he?
What do I know about coaching kids?
Everything!
You can be anything you want to be.
I could do without Debs starting that new cleaning job today, though.
I can't believe you've not spoken to her since the funeral.
Well, it's probably for the best.
Anyway, I have decided, at work,
I'm going to rise above it and be the ultimate professional.
Oh, yeah? The last time you were being the "ultimate professional",
I got a black eye, remember?
SHE CHUCKLES
Thank you.
What for?
Just...always making me feel better.
Good luck.
Whoa.
I don't think I was this scared on my first day of school.
Yeah, well, it's just a cleaning job. How hard could it be?
Judging by the state of the house since Nan went, pretty hard.
Well, there's nothing stopping you from helping.
Oh, well, it is my history presentation today.
Oi!
How long are you going to keep this up?
Oh, OK.
Erm, how much of that 8,545 quid have you managed to get through?
Only I heard the offy had to restock.
Mm. Well, I paid my share of the funeral.
Ha! And I've not been spending it on booze or fags
because I'm saving it for this one.
She's got the chance to go to uni.
Oh, right! And where are my kids going to go, then?
Well, I'm not being funny,
but I doubt Tonya will make it to university, do you? Mum!
Whatever.
Save it for my solicitor.
DEBS SCOFFS
Solicitor!
How are you going to afford that?
Why are you always causing a drama?
Will you two just stop?
You should be grieving over Nana, not scrapping over her money.
It's embarrassing.
Yeah, well, I'm just thinking of your future, love.
Yeah, you keep telling yourself that, Mum.
BELL RINGS
Noel! Noel!
Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel!
Have you seen this?
Yeah, what about it?
Yeah, so, what do you think?
I don't know.
No, it'll be a laugh.
And I... And I genuinely think we've got a chance, right?
I mean...I mean, everyone loved my playing last week, so...
Mate, you're playing at a funeral.
Right, I'm jokin', yeah?
It's just the two of us, it's not really a band, is it?
Yeah, we can put a band together.
The thing is, yeah, I-I can't play basketball any more.
You literally coach basketball.
Yeah, but it's not the same thing, is it?
And now Kai's in Berlin, I just...
..I need something to fill my empty...empty days.
NOEL SIGHS
Can't say no, can I?
Yeah? Yeah.
Yeah, go on, lad!
BELL RINGS
Nice one!
Yes, Mrs Sumi, that's fine.
I can meet you at 10am. No problem.
All right, I look forward to seeing you. Bye, now. Bye.
SHE SCOFFS Well, what am I supposed to do?
She was going to get in touch with Ofsted.
You're already triple booked and you've got that meeting off-site
with the Trust as well later.
Right. You need to let me do your appointments. Yeah.
Hi. Er, do you need your tea station refilling?
Didn't you do that yesterday?
All right, Wendy.
We do need to look at your schedule.
Yeah, all right.
Thank you.
Come on, then. What's it about really?
I presume it's something to do with
that slanging match you and your sister had.
Ah, you heard.
I did hear, yeah.
It's fine, apology accepted.
Please don't bring family matters into school.
Yeah, no, it's something else, actually.
Erm...it's a bit awkward.
Er...
You...You haven't mentioned to anyone that we used to be a thing
back in the day, have you?
No. Oh, I brought it up at staff briefing this morning.
Is that all right?
That's not even funny.
Look, I'm not being rude, Nicky, but I've got so much stuff on.
Oh! I just mean, be quick.
All right. Erm...
Well, it's Donte.
Well, he knows that we knew each other.
He just doesn't know...
How well we knew each other.
Well, yeah.
And you're embarrassed.
Oh, yeah, cos I had braces and curtains. That hurts!
No, it's just...
I just didn't tell him and now I can't tell him because then he'll
think I deliberately didn't tell him and he's just going to wonder why.
Well, yeah.
Well, then it'll feel bigger than it is.
Right, so you want me to lie to him?
Well, it's not lying, is it? It's not really.
Well, you know me - I think honesty's the best policy,
but he'll hear nowt from me.
Thank you.
And I swear, I won't bother you again,
unless it is actually to refill your tea station.
BELL RINGS
He's all right, you know.
Who is?
Your dad, the head, whatever.
He's all right.
Is he? Yeah, he had my back last week.
What do you mean?
Has he not told you?
No, he doesn't really talk about work.
So, what do you talk about then? We don't.
Erm, what's your mum like?
She's, erm...
Er...
She... She, er...died.
Oh!
Sorry, er...
Yeah, he's forgotten it would have been her birthday today, so...
I'm...I'm so sorry.
Do...Do you want to talk about it?
No. Thank God.
No, I'm...I'm not good at that... Yeah, no, me either, so...
So, erm...
You going to that?
I was thinking I might actually try out,
but that's like social suicide, innit?
Think you've got that covered with the whole "my dad's the head" thing.
I think my mate Preston's putting a band together
and he's pretty cool, so...
Preston's my brother.
Honestly, he's not that cool.
But it's cute that you think so.
Mog fancies Preston!
No, no, I don't!
He was my mentor when I first came here.
I can put in a word if you want to try out.
Yeah. Yeah, that'll be...
That's really cool.
Ooh, big day today!
So, are you nervous about the interview?
No.
Careful what you wish for, right? This, it's not an easy job.
Well, you manage it. How hard can it be?
Well, I say you manage it -
you didn't really cope with the headship, did you?
Sorry, I can be a right cow when I'm nervous.
Ah. You nervous every day?
Miss Walker. Mrs Chandra.
Wow.
OK, so...
..may the best woman win.
Why, thank you. Thank you.
Sorry to interrupt, folks. Shall we crack on, Joe?
Yeah, yeah.
WHISPERS: Lose the neckerchief.
Oh.
HE BREATHES HEAVILY
Hey.
What's going on? Why are you not changed?
Practical's not till later.
This is meant to be a theory lesson.
You were supposed to book an empty classroom.
Yeah, well, no-one told me.
But, look, now we're here, might as well do some practical, OK?
Yeah, we're still not playing.
What? None of you? Why not?
We're all on our period.
What? All of you?
ALL MURMUR ASSENT
Come on, girls.
Look, I've seen the TV adverts, OK?
There is nothing that you can't do.
You can play tennis,
you can roller-skate with dogs and everything.
Look, just give me a break, will you?
If Miss Walker comes in and sees you sat down, drinking lemonade
and eating crisps...
..she's going to think that I'm not up to the job.
Well, to be honest, netball's proper boring anyway.
And also, it's so cleesh.
It's actually cliche.
GIRLS GIGGLE
And it sounds to me like you're just
trying to get out of a bit of hard work.
Look, Mr Donte - or Coach Charles or whatever we're supposed to be
calling you right now - we're not being tight or anything, but,
at the end of the day, you're just a caretaker with a tracksuit on.
You're not a qualified teacher and we don't have to listen to you.
Mm-mm-mm.
Don't look at me.
I'm wasn't even going to play later.
I don't feel well.
You were fine this morning.
I said I'm not playing!
So how would you describe your vision
when it comes to behaviour management?
It's about high expectations, no excuses.
If we lower our standards for them,
they lower their expectations of themselves.
It's my belief that, if you accept mediocre, then that's all you get.
If you come in late, detention.
If you forget your homework, detention.
You smack another kid in the mouth?
You've got detention.
OK, so, how would you describe your leadership style?
As a critical friend.
Oh, come on, Steve, you know me.
You know, I would just say it how it is.
It's my view that the senior leadership team is always there
in a supportive capacity, but, equally, we have to set the tone
and we need to ensure the staff are on board with that.
It's good to see that dealing with staff is one of your strong suits.
Absolutely.
Well, rules are rules, and if staff don't get that...
Detention?
I relish the opportunity to work with colleagues in all capacities.
I've developed excellent relationships
with them over the years.
Hey, you all right?
Oh, hey. How's girls' PE?
Oh, it's like pulling teeth.
They're just so bored.
Yeah, I might try and get 'em to play rugby later.
Oh, aren't you clever?
Yeah, I just hope Steve doesn't hear about this morning, though.
Nah, he won't.
Ste's got a lot on today.
"Ste"?
You're on pet names already?
No...
Cos we know each other from school, remember?
Yeah, I know. I just didn't know you were that close.
Well, we weren't...
..but it's just what people used to call him back in the day.
Better get on.
I'm not going to lie - I smashed it.
Question about school discipline, totally on point.
Question about dealing with the staff,
knocked that bad boy out the park.
Well, you know what they say - pride comes before a fall.
Well, you know, I suppose I was at an unfair advantage,
given me and Steve go back a long time.
I was really there for him - you know, when his wife died.
Course you were.
Although knowing you well could be more of a disadvantage.
Well, I bet the question about relationships with staff
was awkward for you.
Excuse me, ladies.
Who is that?
Mm-mm, come to Nisha.
How's Julia and the kids?
They're great. How's that golf swing?
Could be better.
THEY LAUGH
Well, it's obviously an external candidate.
What? Steve never said he was going to be interviewing anybody else.
Oh, and here's me thinking you two were great pals.
He can't do this!
He's the head. He can do what he wants.
No.
He's probably just Steve's mate.
He was due to meet me ten minutes ago!
I know, but he's not available at the moment.
Well, that's not good enough.
I was persuaded not to go to Ofsted on the promise
that he would see me today.
A teacher was very rude to my child and I want an apology.
If you could just wait here in reception...
Maybe I can help.
This is Mrs Sumi. She has a complaint about a member of staff.
Oh, I see.
I'm Coral Walker.
Deputy head.
Oh. Why don't we go somewhere private, get you a cup of tea
and we can talk?
Well, thanks for seeing me.
I wish Mr Guthrie had your sense of professionalism.
BELL RINGS
What do you mean? It's got to be heavy.
Yeah, but what do you mean by heavy? Everything about it, heavy.
What do you mean by heavy, though? Big song? Yeah, massive...
Er, you guys are in the Battle of the Bands, yeah?
BOTH: Yeah.
Er, can I, like, try out?
Er, we've...we've already got two guitarists.
Yeah, we're...we're just looking for a drummer now, so...
Right. OK
Let's not be too hasty, eh, Preston?
PRESTON SIGHS
Can...can you just give us, like, a sec? Just...
Yeah. ..really, really quick? Yeah. Yeah, cheers.
I don't get why we need another guitarist.
You've got me!
You're all right, yeah?
We should probably at least listen to the guy.
Just stop being tight and let him play.
Don't take it personally.
Don't want to end up like the Gallagher brothers, do we?
No.
All right! All right! Fine, fine.
Yeah? Yeah.
Yeah? Yeah. Billy.
Go on.
Play? Now, like?
Yeah. OK, yeah. Yeah. Yep.
We...We've not got long, though.
Nah, it's all right, just take your time.
Leave him alone! What?!
Nice guitar. I like the strap.
When you're ready.
Sorry. Er...
# I'm going under and this time I fear there's no-one to save me
# This all or nothing really got a way of driving me crazy
# I need somebody to heal
# Somebody to know
# Somebody to have
# Somebody to hold
# It's easy to say
# But it's never the same
# I guess I kind of liked the way you numbed all the pain
# Now the day bleeds
# Into nightfall
# And you're not here
# To get me through it all
# I let my guard down
# Then you pulled the rug
# I was getting kind of used to being someone you loved
# I let my guard down
# Then you pulled the rug
# I was getting kind of used to being someone you loved. #
CHEERING
Hey, what do you think, then, man?
Yeah, man, you're in.
Yeah? Yeah, yeah.
Welcome to the band! Welcome to the band. Billy, innit? Yeah.
Hey. I hope I didn't upset you before.
Yeah, well, you did!
Yeah, well, I'm sorry.
Are you really feeling poorly?
Kind of.
Tonya, come on, talk to me.
You know, maybe I can help.
I doubt it.
This is one of those "if you've not got a womb, you won't understand"
kind of deals.
OK, so it's one of those things, then?
SHE SCOFFS
Yeah, one of those things that you don't have to worry about
because it doesn't affect you.
Come on, I didn't mean it like that.
I was just trying to respect your privacy, that's all.
Yeah, well, there's nothing private
about being doubled up in pain in maths...
..or leaking through your pants on the bus.
My period's really heavy.
Like, really heavy.
And I'm in so much pain.
In the toilets before, I nearly cried because it hurt so much,
but paracetamol doesn't work.
OK. Have you tried talking to your mum?
Yeah, she said, "You try pushing two kids out, then come talk to me!"
Look, I'll ring the doctor later, yeah?
And I'll try and see if I can help, but I am no expert.
Hm!
I mean, Izzy, she...she used to talk to her mum
about all of this, not me.
And thinking about it, men are just useless, really, aren't they?
You're not ALL useless.
Does your dad play?
No, definitely not.
He's got no musical ability whatsoever.
I thought as much.
My, er...
My mum played, though.
Yeah, she was amazing.
What kind of music?
Like, '80s, '90s acoustic.
Proper old, ancient stuff.
You know, like Tracy Chapman, Snow Patrol - that kind of thing.
SHE CHUCKLES
Your mum had good taste.
Mm.
And you've clearly inherited her talent.
You wanted to see me?
Ah, now, this is a bit, erm, delicate...
Ah, I'm sure it doesn't have to be all that delicate...
..especially if I've been a bad, bad boy.
Neil!
This isn't a joke.
Oh, I am so sorry. Did you not get the job?
I-I just thought, with you sending a text saying to meet you here,
that you'd smashed it.
I'm afraid I've got a parent with me.
She's made a complaint about the quality of your teaching
and your "appalling demeanour" with the children.
Her words, not mine.
How's Ste?
What?
You sly dog. You haven't told Donte about him yet, have you?
Keep your voice down.
See, what intrigues me is, why are you keeping it a secret?
It's not as if he thinks you're a virgin.
I know Donte's not the brightest spark in the box,
but the two kids are a bit of a giveaway.
It's none of your business.
Are you still in love with the Head Teacher?
Oh, you are way off the mark!
BELL RINGS Or is it cos he was your first?
I'm not listening to this.
Oh, yes, you are.
Call off them solicitors
or I'm going to tell Donte all about you and little Ste.
Ooh, sorry.
Er, don't look now, but I, er...
I think...
Yeah...Yeah, they've just had another argument.
Oh, I'm so sick of them.
Well, maybe you should have just gotten rid of her completely
instead of asking her to come back.
I need to show Steve what I'm made of.
So, you're using me, then?
No.
KNOCK ON DOOR
This is a private meeting.
Well, unless you two are about to christen this office with your...
.."love", this looks like school business to me.
Look, I know about the complaint against Neil.
Your input is not needed.
Just here to help.
Might be an idea to get some fresh, untainted eyes on this.
It's important that you're not going all softly, softly
on your boyfriend.
Not sure what Steve would think about that.
SHE SIGHS
As I mentioned, Mrs Sumi was concerned about your attitude
because you said...
CLEARS HER THROAT
.."It's not my fault you baboons don't get it."
NISHA CHUCKLES
"You lot wouldn't know what good teaching was
"if it bit you on your hairy backsides."
That was a mistake.
Baboons don't have hairy backsides.
They're smooth. Very smooth.
Do I look one bit amused?!
Look, maybe it's better if I take over from here.
I mean, perhaps you're too closely involved with each other.
I am perfectly able to divorce my relationship with Neil
from my professional dealings with him.
You humiliated that child and you need to make amends.
And you're going to do that today.
Do what today?
Restorative justice...
..between you, and the pupil and the parent.
"Restorative justice"!
That is snide.
Neil, I wouldn't take that.
Nobody asked you.
Enough!
You two are just using this situation
to score points against each other!
I am merely a plaything in your deputy headship game!
I am not a toy!
BELL RINGS
Hmm...
You're not going to win.
We'll see.
SHE SIGHS
Hey!
You all right?
Debs?
How'd you guess?
Because it's always her.
Just forget about all this money business, will you?
And call off the solicitors.
Do you think? I think it's not worth the stress.
Yeah. Yeah, you're probably right.
I'll give 'em a call now.
OK. Look, I've got to go. Mm-hm.
I'll see you later. See you.
LINE RINGS
WHIMPERING
Hey, you all right?
Hello, you're through to... Oh, sorry. Er, yeah, hi...
No, wait!
Hello? Hello. Is that Nicky Walters?
Yeah. Hannah. How can I help?
All right, you, Miss? You're looking a bit, er...
A bit what?!
Sorry, Miss.
Just a bit not happy.
You've got one of them faces, you should be smiling all the time.
It's my sister.
She's getting on my last nerve.
I think I've managed to hit her right where it hurts, though.
In the face, yeah?
SHE LAUGHS
Just families for you, though, innit, Miss? I suppose.
Will you stop calling me "Miss"?
I'm not one of them teachers. You know me. It's just Debs.
Sorry...
..Miss Debs.
"Miss Debs"? You're an idiot!
So, I've only got hold of his guitar
and the second I've got me hands on that...
Whack! Whack!
Oh, mate, I've demolished it!
You smashed my guitar.
And what are you going to do?
Don't. You know, you should listen to your girlfriend, man.
I said I'm not happy that you've wrecked my guitar.
And he said, "What you going to do?"
Yeah, what ARE you going to do? Just leave it.
No, you wrecked my guitar.
I'm going to wreck YOU.
LAUGHTER
YOU'RE going to wreck ME?!
Ha-ha! He's going to wreck me!
Pal, mate, I love that.
You know, I love that so much that I'm going to let you,
so you meet me here after school and you can have a go.
Billy, you can't fight him. He'll smash your face in.
Yeah, I know, but I'm going to have to now, aren't I?
You don't. It's just a broken guitar. Better that than your legs.
You can still play in the band with any old guitar.
It wasn't just any old guitar, though.
Someone gave it me.
Mate, I'm sorry, but you can't mess with people like that.
You're supposed to stand up to bullies!
This is the real world! People like him are dangerous.
You need to tell your dad.
You know what? Just leave me alone.
Oh, Billy, don't be like that.
Billy, come back!
Here again, Nicky?
How'd you know it was me?
Smell of chip fat.
Hey!
I'm joking.
Oi! I've told you, you need an appointment to see Mr Savage.
Oh, he won't mind.
He's on the phone to Ofsted!
OK. All right.
Finished.
SHE SIGHS
Hi. Erm... I know I said I wouldn't bother you,
but I've just seen your lad.
He was on his own by the bins. Looked upset.
Did he say anything?
No, he just ran off, so I thought I'd come and tell you.
Right, thanks. I'd better go and find him.
Out of all the sports, why rugby?
I don't know. I just thought it would be...
Not cliche? Yes...
Yeah. Are you aware that there's a movement away from contact sports
in schools now?
There's a worry that there's a link between head injuries and dementia.
Hmm.
I suppose there is a point to teacher training after all.
You know, erm, for the first session,
we were going to play tag rugby.
Tag rugby? Yeah, tag rugby.
You know, the one with the snotty hankies in the back pocket,
and then you've got to try and, er, whip it out?
I know what tag rugby is, thank you,
but you're never going to get them playing it.
Yeah? Hey, girls!
You're all up for playing tag rugby later, right?
ALL: No, sir!
THEY GIGGLE
"No, sir."
Sorry.
I know you were trying to impress Voldemort,
but what made you think they were actually going to say yeah?
Ah, I don't know.
I just really wanted today to go well, you know?
Hey, that reminds me - I've got you a doctor's appointment
for next week.
Yeah, I mean, I did have to pretend to be your dad.
And I got you some stuff for your period pains.
Don't look at me like that!
What are you smiling for?
Thanks for saying "period".
And thanks for this.
It's all right.
I'm not making any promises,
but I'll try and get some of the girls to play, OK?
Yeah? Get in! Thank you.
Hey, and do me a favour, will you?
Just try and talk to your mum again.
Look, she'll understand!
Donte, out of all my mum's boyfriends -
and there has been a lot - you are my absolute favourite.
Yeah? Well, I've got to say, that means a lot, Tonya.
Don't be getting too big-headed, all right?
They were all trolls, but you're the best of a bad bunch.
Now, do one. I don't want to be seen speaking to a teacher.
All right, see you later.
And if you ever asked her to marry you...
..I'd let you.
You draw the altitude of the hypotenuse on the triangle
and then you divide the length of the shortest side of the
main triangle by the hypotenuse on the main triangle,
then you multiply the result by the length of the remaining...
..side...
..to get the length of the altitude.
You know, maybe if you drew it on the board, Miss,
we'd actually understand it better.
Board's there, I'm here.
What are you going to do?
KNOCK ON DOOR
Ah, Miss Chandra.
You've come with news, I take it.
Oh... No, no. No news on that just yet.
Three very strong candidates,
so it's going to take a while to make a decision.
Oh, right.
Well, I'm just glad it's not a fait accompli, then.
What do you mean?
Well, Coral's dealing with that Mrs Sumi woman
like she's already got the job.
I mean, we'd all love extra opportunities to shine.
SHE CHUCKLES
Er...
Can I speak to Billy for a minute, please?
Billy!
Your dad wants you.
PUPILS: Ohhh!
Make that TWO really strong candidates.
Are you all right, son?
Yeah, why?
Well, it's just that someone saw you,
said you looked a bit upset about something.
What, so you've got spies out now, have you?
No! Course not.
But I'm not stupid, am I?
I know things aren't right for you here,
but I'm not the enemy.
I might be the head, but I'm your dad first.
Yeah, my dad who's forgotten my mum's birthday.
Oh, mate... I-I...
I'm sorry. I am.
I...I just didn't even...
I've got so much...
Look, hey, let me book that place we used to go to all the time.
No. We'll go tonight. No, Dad, I can't.
It's not too late.
PHONE RINGS
Look, just ignore that. Why?
I just...
Oh, you know what? Just take the call.
No, no. No, tell me. I don't... No, it's... Whatever.
PHONE CONTINUES RINGING
DOOR CLOSES
Ready when you are, Kelly Jo.
KELLY JO CLEARS THROAT
So...
..if you were to ask an American what their role was in World War II,
they'd probably say, erm...
..to win it.
LAUGHTER
But, erm, America was way ahead in
terms of its production of weapons.
Without those weapons,
winning the war would have been a lot more difficult.
But...But by the end of the war, Britain owed America a lot!
Like, actually a lot of money.
Like, literally.
Yeah!
SHE LAUGHS
Sir, how cool's that?
I know. Erm...
But, yeah, so, there was a big debt to pay.
On the 29th of Decembre...
LAUGHTER
And, yeah, guys, that actually is Calvin Murdock!
KELLY JO LAUGHS
Don't ask me where I got it.
But that is you because that debt was paid off
on the 29th of December 2006 -
the day...you were born!
You all right?
What are you up to?
Other people's kids are so boring.
I thought speccy four-eyes was never going to shut up.
Look at our Kelly Jo. She's brilliant.
HE CHUCKLES
Hey, erm...
Listen, you do know Nicky's not getting a solicitor involved now?
Look, she's doing the decent thing, yeah?
Maybe you could do the same and just give her half the money.
Our Nicky?
"Decent"?
SHE SCOFFS
What do you mean by that?
Well, if she was doing the decent thing,
then she'd have told you all about her and Ste.
What do you mean, her and Ste?
They weren't just schoolmates.
He was her boyfriend.
Her first proper boyfriend.
You told him?
Why would you do that?
OK, so the debate's
more to do with...
RAISED VOICES OUTSIDE
OUTSIDE: ..you nasty cow?!
PUPILS LAUGH
J-Just ignore it.
Think about your grade.
OUTSIDE: Why don't you start telling your boyfriend...?!
PUPILS LAUGH
OUTSIDE: At least I've got a boyfriend!
PUPILS: Ohhh! Yes, all right, thank you!
Move! Now!
Where is your loyalty?!
You're trying to take money from me that you're not entitled to.
Oh-ho! You have been flaunting your boyfriend in my face for months.
I don't owe you anything, Nicky, and neither did Mum!
How could you stand there and say that?!
It was me who had to live through her being an alky!
She's dead.
Just stop talking about her like that!
No! You were a kid, you were too young.
You had no clue what was going on.
Can we stop talking about this? We're in school!
No! We'll talk about it now!
It was me who had to wait up for her every night,
making sure she wasn't dead in a ditch somewhere!
Me who had to hold her hair back while she was chucking up!
And you, you were in bed.
And I know you were in bed because I was the one who tucked you in
and read you stories
and made you think everything was all right.
Have you any idea what I went through with her?
I know that she stopped drinking when you left.
So, what does that say?
BELL RINGS
I'm surprised Donte's not started hitting the bottle.
That's horrible, Mum.
I'm sick of you playing the victim, Nicky.
You are the only problem round here,
and the sooner that he realises that, the better.
Nice.
She's the one that's out of order, not me.
I can't wait to go to uni and get away from all this, you know.
Nah, you'll miss it when you're gone.
KELLY JO SCOFFS
No.
No, I don't want to be anything like them.
I don't even know who they are any more.
Neither of them, right?
Neither of them are bothered about Nana.
She died.
Yeah, she died!
They're not even upset about it!
I wouldn't fall out with you two over money.
You know if we acted like little kids, we'd get punished for it?
Wait, where are you going?
Here he is, Mr Tag Rugby 2024.
Give us a go.
No-one here yet?
No, not yet, but I'm quietly confident.
Well, I'd love to stay, but I've got a meeting now.
Yeah, right.
You're just wanting to witness my humiliation, you, aren't you?
Little bit.
Hey, listen, the girls said before that they'd feel more comfortable
in PE if they had, like, single cubicles
instead of one big changing room.
Well, budgets are tight. I don't think you've got much chance.
I mean, you don't ask, you don't get, right?
SHE CHUCKLES
Oh, you have got a lot to learn!
But you're showing initiative
and, in my book, that shows the makings of a good teacher.
You think so? Yeah.
No harm in looking into it.
Try and speak to Steve, maybe?
Ah! As if by magic!
Oh, thank God.
No, thank us.
Donte, can we talk?
I'm kind of in the middle of something right now.
Right, come on, girls.
Let's go!
Some of my words were not appropriate.
I acknowledge that now.
I probably assumed - quite wrongly, of course...
..that you must have some sort of sense of humour.
I enjoy humour, but, on this occasion,
I think you fell short of the mark.
Well, on this occasion, I am forced to agree with your insight.
And I apologise.
I appreciate your sincere apology.
And I accept it.
Well, I appreciate your acceptance of my sincere apology.
Thank you. Thank you.
I think we've done enough restorative work for today.
Sorry to interrupt, everybody.
Mrs Sumi, I'll be with you shortly.
Miss Walker, can we, er, have a quick word?
Start talking.
What are you playing at? I was helping you out.
I saw a parent in distress, you were busy,
I dealt with it.
Yeah, and thank you, but it's not helpful
when other candidates think it's giving you an unfair advantage.
And you can't just use my office whenever you fancy playing deputy.
Mrs Sumi, I'm so sorry that I missed our appointment.
Ah, Miss Walker intercepted
and let me observe the restorative justice session, which,
I understand, is not normal practice so, er...
..well, we appreciate it.
We've made good progress, Mr Savage.
I'm assuming you're happy that no further action...
Well, that went well.
Mm! Yeah, peachy!
Oh, er, please, Miss, may I go back to my class now?
Don't be like that, Neil.
You could have been a bit more supportive.
I was.
We're supposed to be...
You and I...
Are nothing more than professional colleagues when we're in school.
Oh.
I see.
SHE SIGHS
How come you're not playing rugby?
Can't be bothered.
Donte did good, though.
Aw, you want him to be our new daddy?
SHE CHUCKLES
A little bit, yeah.
Yeah, a little bit? Yeah.
Move, please!
Kelly Jo, get back here, now!
Don't do anything stupid!
What is going on?!
She's got your nana's money! Hurry up!
Kelly Jo!
Come back here!
Come on, Auntie Nicky!
Excuse me! Out the way!
Listen to me now!
I'm going to kill her!
Erm, excuse me!
What on earth are you doing?! It's all right, it's under control.
Kelly Jo, please, listen.
You can't just throw money away like that.
I don't even want it any more!
Oi! Look!
The ugly sisters are getting schooled.
You can't call 'em that, Kelly Jo!
I'm warning you, Kelly Jo!
I asked you to stop, right?
And you.
And you wouldn't.
So I'm going to get rid of the thing that you love the most.
Say bye-bye!
Bye-bye!
DEBS SHRIEKS
MUSIC: Figure It Out by Royal Blood
DEBS SHOUTS
What are you doing?
Debs! Debs, just leave it now!
This is so embarrassing.
What on earth is going on?
Any money, hand it to me! Back to reception, now!
Right, everyone, inside, now!
You two, with me!
And you, come on.
Thank you.
Really?!
I-I cannot get over what I just saw. CLICKING
Will you put that down?!
Kelly Jo, I thought you'd turned a corner.
Well, it's not her fault, is it?
This is down to me and Debs.
Do you know what? I agree with you.
I mean, Debs, it's your first day.
Could be the shortest job on record.
It's not. No. No.
Oh, I'm...
Right, you're both on a warning.
And in your case, Nicky...
PHONE CHIMES
..it could be your last.
BELL RINGS
Oh! Oh...
DOOR OPENS
Er, no, sorry, did I...?
I've just spoken to Steve.
And he said you went out of you way
to smooth things over with Mrs Sumi,
so now I see that you were trying to stick up for me
without making it obvious that you were sticking up for me.
Caught on, did you?
You are very smart.
And I know that you were born to be deputy head.
I don't think so.
Mr Suited and Booted from the other school is bound to get it.
Well, I don't think they could have anyone better than you.
Thank you.
DOOR OPENS
Coral, can I have a word?
Here we go.
SHE SIGHS
I'm sorry...
..but you have got the job.
I've got the job?
Yeah, you got it.
I got...
I got the job! Yeah, yeah!
LAUGHTER
Oh, oh... Ooh, I'm going in for the neck.
Call me Deputy. Ooh, vive la France...
N-no. No. No.
Ugh.
Where is he, eh?
SINGSONG: Looo-ser!
Looo-ser!
I don't think he's coming.
Bwaaawk! Buck-buck-buck-buck! Bwa-kaaawk!
Billy!
Look, please, don't do this.
No, cos maybe if I do, then...
..then, you know, that'll be it.
He'll leave me alone.
Listen to me. You are making this so much worse for yourself.
Just back out! It's not too late!
Oi, Billy boy!
No, Billy...
Billy, don't! Billy!
LOUD CHATTER AND LAUGHTER
Hold him, hold him.
Bring him down.
Hold him, hold him. That's it.
Oh, Billy, have you no shame?
That's disgusting.
SHUTTER CLICKS
Head's here. Head's here.
Hey! What the hell's going on?
You're suspended!
You know, I've still got that 20.
Do you want a takeaway?
What?! Nothing.
Yo, legend!
Yeah? Yeah!
I cannot believe you actually did that.
Yeah, well, I was sick of 'em.
Oh, yeah, and now there's no money,
there's nothing for them to argue about, so...
Well...
..I got what I could.
Right, I, erm...
..wouldn't say there wasn't ANY money.
KELLY JO CHUCKLES
I guess the best hottie won.
Thank you.
Erm...do want to come to the pub with us?
Mm... Don't know.
Oh, come on.
Hey, it'll be my treat.
I've come into some money.
Have you? Yeah, heh-heh.
I'll get us a bottle of champagne.
Ooh, champagne?
Er, actually...
Wait, what? It was all fake?
No, no, no, so...so the first few notes were real,
but then the rest of it was toy money from the pound shop.
LAUGHTER
Yeah. I just wanted to teach them a lesson, you know?
You don't think I was stupid, doing that, do you?
No. Our mums are going to speak to each other
at some point, eventually.
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, they always do. Yeah.
So, come on, are you not going to ask me
where the rest of the money is?
Where is it? Where's the real money, Kelly Jo?
Well, lucky dip.
Tonya, feel that.
Preston.
Ta-da!
What? Go on, hurry up.
Preston, open it. Preston, open it.
PRESTON GASPS, TONYA SCREAMS
Are you mad?!
Are you taking the mick?!
Yeah. Oh, my God.
This is the most money I've ever seen in my entire life.
I could...I could buy a better guitar with this. Show Noel up.
Oh, well, you're not spending it, so...
Wait, what?
Yeah. Mate, you've changed.
Yeah.
What are we supposed to do with it, then?
I really think we should put it away, towards our futures.
How boring! Well, my future could be...a good guitar.
Oh, no. Mm. OK. OK, OK. Look...
..this money, this money's a chance for us to have a better life, right?
You can't just spend it on trainers and booze.
Yous could actually do something with it, yeah?
So...
..I really think that this is what Nana would have wanted.
Yeah? For the three of us to have a better life.
A-greeeed?
PRESTON IMITATES VOICE
Agreed? Come on, come on! Go on!
All right! A-greeed.
A-greeed! So, to a better future...
..and to Nana.
To a better future and to Nana.
To Nana! Nana! To Nana! Thank you.
Thank you. Yeah! Yo, you're actually a genius, you know. You're rich!
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Last one home's a smelly loser!
You're still buying me a chippie!
LAUGHTER
HE BREATHES HEAVILY
I heard.
Are you OK?
That was a day from hell, that.
What sort of dad doesn't know his son's being bullied?
Has Billy said anything?
Not a word, but I'll talk to him later.
So, you don't know who's involved?
They saw me before I saw them and scarpered.
I suspended Stacey Neville, though.
Good. She's a right one.
Joe said the same thing about you and your sister.
Yeah... Er... Listen, I prob...
I wanted to say sorry about that.
People don't realise the kind of baggage
the likes of us bring, you know?
I remember thinking that, when I have kids, I'm going to give
'em a great life.
I'm going to protect them.
And that with Billy today, it just...
I've failed him, haven't I?
Hey, no, you haven't.
I felt like that with Preston.
His mental health was so bad.
When I look back over that now, I can't believe we got through it.
But you did.
Yeah, we did.
And so will you.
Did you enjoy that?
Well, there's plenty more where that came from.
TRICKLING
I'll see you next week, pal.
Right, well, I should probably go.
Erm...Debs told Donte about us.
How did he take it?
Yeah, not well.
Seems I'm not the only one having the day from hell.
Erm...listen, I know it looked like we were scrapping over me mum's
money, but we weren't.
Debs said that, erm...
..Mum stopped drinking after I left,
which is why I was so mad.
Don't let her do that.
Her drinking wasn't your fault.
The thing is, though, she did stop after I left.
And I think she stopped for Debs.
Obviously, I...I wasn't enough.
Hey...
..how could you not be enough?
HE SCOFFS
Babe! Babe, wait!
You're fast when you're mad.
I'm not mad.
OK, all right, maybe I am mad.
I just can't believe you weren't honest with me!
I mean, what is it, you still got feelings for the guy or summat?
No! Absolutely not!
Then what?! Look, I shouldn't have lied to you.
I just was scared...
Scared? Scared of what? Me?
Of losing you.
You're the best thing that's ever walked into my life,
and I know it sounds stupid.
I just...
I was scared that, if I told you about me and Ste,
everything would just get really awkward
and I just didn't want anything to change.
I think the world of you, Nick.
I mean, Tonya, she even said that she'd be happy
if we got married one day.
What?
Ah, don't worry, I won't be doing that to you now.
If you ask me, I'll say yes.
What?
In fact, if you're not going to ask me...
What are you doing?
Just come here, please.
I love you...
..more than I've ever loved anyone my whole life.
Donte Charles...
..will you marry me?
Come here.
SHE CHUCKLES
Sorry, son.
You OK?
Going to tell me who's doing this to you?
It's no-one.
I can't help you unless you
tell me what's going on, son.
STEVE SIGHS
Fine.