1 00:00:00,201 --> 00:00:08,142 . 2 00:00:08,176 --> 00:00:10,078 - STOP. STOP. - FATHER. 3 00:00:10,111 --> 00:00:11,179 - STOP CALLING ME THAT. 4 00:00:11,212 --> 00:00:13,081 - YOU HAVE TO TAKE IT EASY, FATHER. 5 00:00:13,114 --> 00:00:15,416 - SHAWN, WOULD YOU LET ME GO. - BUILD UP YOUR STRENGTH. 6 00:00:15,449 --> 00:00:17,051 - DO YOU KNOW HOW ANNOYING YOU ARE? 7 00:00:17,085 --> 00:00:19,587 CALLING ME FATHER, LIKE IN SOME BLACK-AND-WHITE MOVIE? 8 00:00:19,620 --> 00:00:21,055 - BUT I'M JUST TRYING TO HELP YOU, FATHER. 9 00:00:21,089 --> 00:00:22,490 - HENRY, LET HIM HELP YOU. 10 00:00:22,523 --> 00:00:23,691 - I DON'T NEED ANY HELP WALKING. 11 00:00:23,724 --> 00:00:24,792 I'M FINE. 12 00:00:24,825 --> 00:00:26,827 BOTH OF YOU, JUST-- I'M FINE. 13 00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:29,163 - WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CLEANED THIS THING OUT? 14 00:00:29,197 --> 00:00:30,564 - LOOK, MOM, YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO FLY ALL THE WAY HERE 15 00:00:30,598 --> 00:00:31,665 JUST FOR THIS. 16 00:00:31,699 --> 00:00:33,234 - IS THIS A CORN DOG? 17 00:00:33,267 --> 00:00:35,336 - I DON'T KNOW. BUT THERE'S ONE WAY TO FIND OUT. 18 00:00:35,369 --> 00:00:36,804 TAKE A BITE. - I'M NOT BITING INTO THIS. 19 00:00:36,837 --> 00:00:39,107 - JUST GET A LITTLE BITTY BITE. - NO, I DON'T WANT ANY. 20 00:00:39,140 --> 00:00:40,474 IT'S DISGUSTING. NOW, I ONLY MADE A FEW MEALS. 21 00:00:40,508 --> 00:00:41,775 I'M ONLY HERE A COUPLE OF DAYS. 22 00:00:41,809 --> 00:00:43,577 SOMEBODY'S GOT TO CHECK ON HIM. - I GET IT. 23 00:00:43,611 --> 00:00:45,846 YOU WANT ME TO SWING BY, MAKE SURE HE HAS FRESH WATER. 24 00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:47,581 YOU KNOW... 25 00:00:47,615 --> 00:00:49,183 CHANGE HIS COLOSTOMY BAG. 26 00:00:49,217 --> 00:00:50,851 - HE DOESN'T HAVE A COLOSTOMY BAG. 27 00:00:50,884 --> 00:00:53,121 - ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT? BECAUSE I THINK HE MIGHT. 28 00:00:53,154 --> 00:00:57,125 - GOOSE, DO YOU REALIZE HE ALMOST DIED? 29 00:00:57,158 --> 00:00:58,859 - I'M SORRY, MOM. I JUST-- 30 00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:01,095 I CAN'T TAKE YOU SERIOUSLY WHILE YOU'RE HOLDING THAT THING. 31 00:01:01,129 --> 00:01:02,563 - I KNOW YOU MAY FIND THIS HARD TO BELIEVE, 32 00:01:02,596 --> 00:01:04,132 BUT SOMEDAY YOU'RE GONNA WANT THESE TIMES BACK. 33 00:01:04,165 --> 00:01:05,733 MAYBE THIS IS YOUR CHANCE 34 00:01:05,766 --> 00:01:07,768 TO GET TO KNOW HIM IN A DIFFERENT WAY. 35 00:01:07,801 --> 00:01:09,370 - MM, I DON'T KNOW IF I NEED TO GET TO KNOW HIM 36 00:01:09,403 --> 00:01:10,438 IN ANY ADDITIONAL WAYS. 37 00:01:10,471 --> 00:01:12,473 I MEAN, THE ONE WAY SEEMS SOLID. 38 00:01:12,506 --> 00:01:15,576 IT SEEMS SUFFICIENT. 39 00:01:15,609 --> 00:01:17,645 I AM NOT MAKING ANY PROMISES. 40 00:01:17,678 --> 00:01:21,882 BUT I WILL TAKE YOUR WORDS UNDER ADVISEMENT. 41 00:01:21,915 --> 00:01:26,154 - INSERT PLANK "J" INTO PEG "H." 42 00:01:26,187 --> 00:01:27,155 THERE IS NO PEG "H." 43 00:01:27,188 --> 00:01:28,489 PEG "H" DOESN'T EXIST. 44 00:01:28,522 --> 00:01:30,424 I AM GOING TO KILL SOMEBODY. 45 00:01:30,458 --> 00:01:32,893 - YOU JUST DON'T KNOW HOW TO TAKE A SWEDISH PRACTICAL JOKE. 46 00:01:32,926 --> 00:01:34,628 - YOU CAN GO HOME, SHAWN. - I CAN'T. 47 00:01:34,662 --> 00:01:35,796 I HAVE TO TELL YOU WHY I'M HERE. 48 00:01:35,829 --> 00:01:37,331 THERE'S A REASON. IT'S THIS. 49 00:01:37,365 --> 00:01:40,401 JULES, I JUST HAD A MAJOR EPIPHANY. 50 00:01:40,434 --> 00:01:41,669 - HMM. 51 00:01:41,702 --> 00:01:43,637 - YOU KNOW MY LEASE IS ALMOST UP. 52 00:01:43,671 --> 00:01:44,905 - YES. 53 00:01:44,938 --> 00:01:48,809 I MAY HAVE BEEN VAGUELY AWARE OF THAT FACT. 54 00:01:48,842 --> 00:01:51,645 - RIGHT, WELL, I'M THINKING, 55 00:01:51,679 --> 00:01:54,315 "SHAWN, IT'S TIME TO MOVE FORWARD IN YOUR LIFE." 56 00:01:54,348 --> 00:01:56,750 AS A MAN, YOU KNOW. - YEAH. 57 00:01:56,784 --> 00:01:58,886 - IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT ME ANYMORE. 58 00:01:58,919 --> 00:02:02,856 - I THINK THAT IS A VERY MATURE THOUGHT, MR. SPENCER. 59 00:02:02,890 --> 00:02:04,692 - SO YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA DO? 60 00:02:04,725 --> 00:02:05,893 - WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? 61 00:02:05,926 --> 00:02:09,797 - I AM GONNA MOVE IN. 62 00:02:09,830 --> 00:02:12,866 WITH MY DAD. 63 00:02:12,900 --> 00:02:14,868 MMM. 64 00:02:14,902 --> 00:02:17,205 - [clears throat] SHAWN. - I KNOW, RIGHT? 65 00:02:17,238 --> 00:02:19,340 HOW MANY MORE TIMES IS MY FATHER GONNA BE RECOVERING 66 00:02:19,373 --> 00:02:21,309 FROM A GUNSHOT WOUND IN MY LIFETIME? 67 00:02:21,342 --> 00:02:25,713 MAYBE ONCE. MAYBE, IF I'M LUCKY. HA. 68 00:02:25,746 --> 00:02:27,681 WHAT? YOU'RE COOL, RIGHT? 69 00:02:27,715 --> 00:02:29,317 DON'T LIE TO ME, 70 00:02:29,350 --> 00:02:30,651 BECAUSE I CAN ALWAYS TELL WHEN YOU'RE LYING. 71 00:02:30,684 --> 00:02:33,287 - OH, I AM SO COOL, SHAWN. 72 00:02:33,321 --> 00:02:35,323 - OH, GOOD. WHEW. - YEAH. 73 00:02:35,356 --> 00:02:37,858 - FOR A SECOND, YOU HAD ME WORRIED THERE. 74 00:02:47,668 --> 00:02:50,371 UH, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 75 00:02:50,404 --> 00:02:52,206 - LOOK, IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE. 76 00:02:52,240 --> 00:02:53,807 I'M JUST TAKING ADDITIONAL PHOTOS 77 00:02:53,841 --> 00:02:56,844 FOR MY SOULMATECONNECT.COM ONLINE DATING PROFILE. 78 00:02:56,877 --> 00:02:58,412 - WHEW. 79 00:02:58,446 --> 00:02:59,647 I THOUGHT THERE WAS SOMETHING TRULY EMBARRASSING 80 00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:00,848 GOING ON IN HERE. 81 00:03:00,881 --> 00:03:03,251 - LOOK, I NEED TO BE IN LOVE, SHAWN. 82 00:03:03,284 --> 00:03:04,652 EVERYONE I'VE GONE AFTER DURING THE LAST YEAR 83 00:03:04,685 --> 00:03:06,787 HAS EITHER BEEN A KILLER OR DATING A KILLER. 84 00:03:06,820 --> 00:03:08,889 - OH, WELL, BY ALL MEANS, LET'S SCOUR THE INTERNET-- 85 00:03:08,922 --> 00:03:10,358 THE PLACE WHERE EVERYONE KNOWS 86 00:03:10,391 --> 00:03:12,293 IT'S JUST DECENT, NORMAL, SANE PEOPLE 87 00:03:12,326 --> 00:03:13,927 LOOKING FOR TRUE LOVE. 88 00:03:13,961 --> 00:03:15,729 - YOU THINK YOU KNOW SO MUCH, SHAWN. 89 00:03:15,763 --> 00:03:16,797 TAKE A LOOK AT THIS. 90 00:03:16,830 --> 00:03:19,633 BOOM. SHE'S PERFECT. 91 00:03:19,667 --> 00:03:22,370 SHE'S LIKE AN INDIAN PRINCESS WHO BAKES PIES. 92 00:03:22,403 --> 00:03:23,471 AND I HAVE A DATE WITH HER. 93 00:03:23,504 --> 00:03:25,439 SO... * SUCK IT 94 00:03:25,473 --> 00:03:28,442 - BUDDY, YOU KNOW I'M IN YOUR CORNER, RIGHT? 95 00:03:28,476 --> 00:03:31,011 BUT EVERYONE LIES ON THESE THINGS. 96 00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:33,381 OF COURSE, SHE LOOKS ALL PRETTY ONLINE. 97 00:03:33,414 --> 00:03:34,882 WHEN YOU SHOW UP AT THE RESTAURANT, 98 00:03:34,915 --> 00:03:36,884 GUESS WHO'S WAVING AT YOU FROM THE BAR? 99 00:03:36,917 --> 00:03:38,919 THE NEW DELHI VERSION OF COLONEL SANDERS, WITH A WIG. 100 00:03:38,952 --> 00:03:40,921 - AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE ON A SUNDAY, ANYWAY, SHAWN? 101 00:03:40,954 --> 00:03:42,590 I WAS SUPPOSED TO HAVE PRIVACY. 102 00:03:42,623 --> 00:03:43,657 - I NEED TO BORROW YOUR SUITCASE. 103 00:03:43,691 --> 00:03:44,792 - WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOURS? 104 00:03:44,825 --> 00:03:46,260 AND WHERE ARE YOU GOING? 105 00:03:46,294 --> 00:03:47,628 - YOURS HAS WHEELS, AND THE ZIPPER WORKS. 106 00:03:47,661 --> 00:03:49,563 AND I'M MOVING IN WITH MY DAD. 107 00:03:49,597 --> 00:03:50,631 - YOU'RE DOING WHAT NOW? 108 00:03:50,664 --> 00:03:51,965 DOES JULIET KNOW ABOUT THIS? 109 00:03:51,999 --> 00:03:52,933 - YEAH, I TOLD HER LAST NIGHT. 110 00:03:52,966 --> 00:03:54,535 - AND YOU'RE STILL ALIVE? 111 00:03:54,568 --> 00:03:56,804 - GUS, MY DAD WAS SHOT. - MM-HMM. 112 00:03:56,837 --> 00:03:57,905 - OKAY, HE'S GONNA NEED HELP 113 00:03:57,938 --> 00:03:59,740 DOING NORMAL, EVERYDAY ACTIVITIES. 114 00:03:59,773 --> 00:04:02,009 - RIGHT. - JULIET UNDERSTANDS THAT. 115 00:04:02,042 --> 00:04:05,012 SHE KNOWS THAT SOMEDAY, EVENTUALLY, 116 00:04:05,045 --> 00:04:07,915 WE WILL MOVE IN TOGETHER. YOU DON'T KNOW HER LIKE I DO. 117 00:04:07,948 --> 00:04:10,351 SHE'S NOT A REACTIVE PERSON. SHE'S COOL. 118 00:04:10,384 --> 00:04:11,519 - JULIET IS COOL. 119 00:04:11,552 --> 00:04:13,354 - YEAH, SHE'S COOL LIKE THAT. 120 00:04:13,387 --> 00:04:15,923 - BUT IT LOOKS LIKE HELENE IS BACK ON THE MARKET, 121 00:04:15,956 --> 00:04:18,359 LIKE THAT. - HELENE? 122 00:04:22,863 --> 00:04:24,365 WH-- 123 00:04:24,398 --> 00:04:28,302 [The Friendly Indians' I Know You Know] 124 00:04:28,336 --> 00:04:29,837 - * I KNOW YOU KNOW 125 00:04:29,870 --> 00:04:31,572 * THAT I'M NOT TELLING THE TRUTH * 126 00:04:31,605 --> 00:04:32,973 * I KNOW YOU KNOW 127 00:04:33,006 --> 00:04:34,542 * THEY JUST DON'T HAVE ANY PROOF * 128 00:04:34,575 --> 00:04:35,843 * EMBRACE THE DECEPTION 129 00:04:35,876 --> 00:04:37,845 * LEARN HOW TO BEND 130 00:04:37,878 --> 00:04:39,547 * YOUR WORST INHIBITIONS 131 00:04:39,580 --> 00:04:42,683 * TEND TO PSYCH YOU OUT IN THE END * 132 00:04:42,716 --> 00:04:44,418 * I KNOW YOU KNOW 133 00:04:48,489 --> 00:04:50,424 - OKAY, UM, WELL, I GUESS I BECAME FASCINATED 134 00:04:50,458 --> 00:04:51,792 WITH SEA HORSES WHEN I WAS ABOUT EIGHT. 135 00:04:51,825 --> 00:04:53,427 BUT THEN I BECAME VERY SERIOUS ABOUT THEM 136 00:04:53,461 --> 00:04:54,628 IN MY 20s. 137 00:04:54,662 --> 00:04:56,964 UH, LITTLE KNOWN FACT-- YOU KNOW, 138 00:04:56,997 --> 00:04:58,699 THEY DON'T ACTUALLY WEAR SADDLES LIKE THEY DO IN CARTOONS. 139 00:04:58,732 --> 00:05:00,601 [laughter] 140 00:05:00,634 --> 00:05:04,638 - CAN I SHOW YOU SOMETHING? - SURE. 141 00:05:04,672 --> 00:05:08,776 - THIS IS A PHOTO OF ME 142 00:05:08,809 --> 00:05:10,844 WITH MY LONG-SNOUTED SEA HORSE. 143 00:05:10,878 --> 00:05:12,546 HIS NAME IS HERSCHEL. 144 00:05:12,580 --> 00:05:14,682 - OH, GREAT NAME. - THANKS. [clears throat] 145 00:05:14,715 --> 00:05:15,949 HE'S SORT OF LIKE THE GRANDPA OF THE GROUP. 146 00:05:15,983 --> 00:05:18,586 HE'S GOT A VERY FRAGILE LOWER G.I. SYSTEM. 147 00:05:18,619 --> 00:05:20,454 YOU HAVE TO BE VERY CAREFUL, ACTUALLY, 148 00:05:20,488 --> 00:05:21,922 'CAUSE THEY'RE NOT OMNIVORES, LIKE SOME PEOPLE THINK. 149 00:05:21,955 --> 00:05:23,991 THEY'RE ACTUALLY HERBIVORES, BUT-- 150 00:05:24,024 --> 00:05:25,893 OH, SIR! SIR! SIR! 151 00:05:25,926 --> 00:05:27,628 SIR, EXCUSE ME! WHAT THE HELL? 152 00:05:27,661 --> 00:05:31,465 - OH, GEE, I'M SORRY. HELLO, HELENE. 153 00:05:31,499 --> 00:05:33,667 DO YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY FOR YOURSELF? 154 00:05:33,701 --> 00:05:35,135 - WHO IS THIS GUY? - WHO AM I? 155 00:05:35,168 --> 00:05:37,505 WHO ARE YOU? I'M THE BOYFRIEND, 156 00:05:37,538 --> 00:05:39,940 SO STOP STARING CREEPILY INTO HER GREEN EYES, JACK. 157 00:05:39,973 --> 00:05:41,875 - OH, ACTUALLY, MY NAME'S MIKE. - MY EYES ARE BLUE. 158 00:05:41,909 --> 00:05:43,010 - HOW DO YOU KNOW? YOU CAN'T SEE THEM. 159 00:05:43,043 --> 00:05:47,481 - MIKE, THIS IS MY EX-BOYFRIEND. 160 00:05:47,515 --> 00:05:49,950 - EX? OH, THAT'S HOW WE'RE GONNA PLAY THIS. 161 00:05:49,983 --> 00:05:52,720 OH, COME ON! HE'S NOT EVEN GOOD-LOOKING. 162 00:05:52,753 --> 00:05:55,823 I MEAN, HE'S--IT'S OKAY. 163 00:05:55,856 --> 00:05:57,925 YOU KNOW WHAT? IT'S NOT GREAT, I'M SORRY. 164 00:05:57,958 --> 00:05:59,960 IT'S NOT. YOU KNOW, I'M NOT SORRY. 165 00:05:59,993 --> 00:06:01,662 DO YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY FOR YOURSELF? 166 00:06:01,695 --> 00:06:03,531 - YOU HAVE GOT TO EFFING BE KIDDING ME. 167 00:06:03,564 --> 00:06:04,865 MCNAB! 168 00:06:04,898 --> 00:06:06,967 GET OUT THERE AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS. 169 00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:09,503 - OH, I WISH I COULD, SIR, BUT I'M IN THE WEEDS RIGHT NOW. 170 00:06:09,537 --> 00:06:11,972 - YOU GET-- GET SPENCER OUT OF THERE 171 00:06:12,005 --> 00:06:15,843 BEFORE HE BLOWS THIS WHOLE DAMN THING! GO! 172 00:06:15,876 --> 00:06:18,512 LEAVE THE SPAGHETTI! 173 00:06:18,546 --> 00:06:20,548 - I'M SORRY, MICHAEL. MY EX-BOYFRIEND, 174 00:06:20,581 --> 00:06:22,916 HE'S A LITTLE UNBALANCED, VERY IMMATURE. 175 00:06:22,950 --> 00:06:24,685 HE JUST MOVED BACK HOME. 176 00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:25,919 - ALL RIGHT, WE'RE GONNA PLAY DIRTY BALL, HUH? 177 00:06:25,953 --> 00:06:27,555 WE'RE GONNA PLAY OLD-SCHOOL NASTY BALL? 178 00:06:27,588 --> 00:06:29,557 WELL, GOOD LUCK FINDING MORE GARLIC STICKS. 179 00:06:29,590 --> 00:06:32,025 WHAT? WHAT? 180 00:06:32,059 --> 00:06:34,562 MCNAB? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 181 00:06:34,595 --> 00:06:36,930 - THIS IS MY TABLE. - THIS IS YOUR-- 182 00:06:47,775 --> 00:06:49,076 HMM. YOU KNOW WHAT? 183 00:06:49,109 --> 00:06:50,878 I'VE HAD SOME TIME TO THINK ABOUT THIS, 184 00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:53,947 AND, UH, I'M WAY OUT OF LINE HERE. 185 00:06:53,981 --> 00:06:56,183 I'D LIKE TO APOLOGIZE. 186 00:06:56,216 --> 00:06:58,786 YOU ARE BOTH LOVELY. YOU ARE ESPECIALLY LOVELY. 187 00:06:58,819 --> 00:07:00,988 - THANK YOU. - DESSERT'S GONNA BE ON ME. 188 00:07:01,021 --> 00:07:03,924 I'M GONNA GO HIT MY SIDEWORK, MARRY SOME KETCHUPS. 189 00:07:03,957 --> 00:07:05,993 WE HAVE A CHOCOLATE FLOURLESS CAKE, 190 00:07:06,026 --> 00:07:07,661 LIKE EVERY OTHER RESTAURANT ON THE PLANET, 191 00:07:07,695 --> 00:07:08,996 BUT OURS REALLY IS AMAZING. 192 00:07:09,029 --> 00:07:11,131 IT REALLY IS, AND IT'S COMING YOUR WAY. 193 00:07:11,164 --> 00:07:12,900 YOU DON'T WORK HERE, MCNAB. - NOT YET. 194 00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:15,135 - LASSIE, I NEED A FLOURLESS CHOCOLATE CAKE, ON THE FLY. 195 00:07:15,168 --> 00:07:16,937 - GOOD GOING, SPENCER. 196 00:07:16,970 --> 00:07:18,038 YOU MAY HAVE JUST BLOWN O'HARA'S COVER 197 00:07:18,071 --> 00:07:18,939 AND SIX WEEKS WORTH OF WORK. 198 00:07:18,972 --> 00:07:20,641 - SO, NO CAKE? 199 00:07:20,674 --> 00:07:22,009 - OKAY, LISTEN UP. 200 00:07:22,042 --> 00:07:23,243 IN THE PAST THREE MONTHS, 201 00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:26,213 TWO WOMEN IN THEIR LATE 20s WERE KILLED. 202 00:07:26,246 --> 00:07:28,882 BOTH OF THESE WOMEN WERE STRANGLED, 203 00:07:28,916 --> 00:07:31,785 THEIR BODIES BOTH FOUND IN A DENSE WOODED AREA. 204 00:07:31,819 --> 00:07:34,888 HOWEVER, WE WERE UNABLE TO FIND ANY OTHER EVIDENCE 205 00:07:34,922 --> 00:07:37,658 WHICH CONNECTED THESE TWO WOMEN. 206 00:07:37,691 --> 00:07:39,960 UNTIL WE FOUND THIS. 207 00:07:39,993 --> 00:07:41,629 - [whistles] 208 00:07:43,063 --> 00:07:44,998 - BOTH OF THESE WOMEN HAD PROFILES 209 00:07:45,032 --> 00:07:48,536 ON THE DATING SITE SOULMATECONNECTION.COM 210 00:07:48,569 --> 00:07:50,070 NOW, IN ADDITION, 211 00:07:50,103 --> 00:07:55,042 THEY DATED A CROSS SECTION OF THESE SIX MEN IN COMMON. 212 00:07:55,075 --> 00:07:56,243 SO WE BELIEVE THAT ONE OF THESE MEN 213 00:07:56,276 --> 00:07:57,878 IS THE POSSIBLE KILLER. 214 00:07:57,911 --> 00:08:01,181 SO WE SENT DETECTIVE O'HARA UNDERCOVER 215 00:08:01,214 --> 00:08:02,850 TO HELP DRAW THESE MEN OUT. 216 00:08:02,883 --> 00:08:04,885 [solitary applause] - BOTTOM LINE. 217 00:08:04,918 --> 00:08:06,219 GREAT NEWS, PEOPLE. 218 00:08:06,253 --> 00:08:08,288 ALLOW ME TO CLARIFY, CHIEF. 219 00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:10,824 WHAT I MEAN TO SAY IS SIMPLY THAT 220 00:08:10,858 --> 00:08:12,693 THANK GOODNESS IT TURNS OUT 221 00:08:12,726 --> 00:08:15,162 IT MIGHT JUST BE A MANIACAL SERIAL KILLER ON THE PROWL 222 00:08:15,195 --> 00:08:18,566 AND NOT THAT DETECTIVE O'HARA WAS TRULY OUT THERE 223 00:08:18,599 --> 00:08:19,933 DATING STRANGE MEN. 224 00:08:19,967 --> 00:08:21,068 - SHAWN, I HAVE ANOTHER DATE TOMORROW. 225 00:08:21,101 --> 00:08:22,536 - ARE YOU INSANE? 226 00:08:22,570 --> 00:08:23,737 HAVE YOU COMPLETELY LOST YOUR MIND? 227 00:08:23,771 --> 00:08:25,005 - WHAT, ARE YOU KIDDING? 228 00:08:25,038 --> 00:08:25,873 YOU WENT ON A TELEVISION DATING SHOW 229 00:08:25,906 --> 00:08:27,708 AND MADE IT TO THE FINALE. 230 00:08:27,741 --> 00:08:30,043 - BECAUSE I AM A MAN! AND I DO WHAT NEEDS TO GET DONE! 231 00:08:30,077 --> 00:08:33,313 - OKAY, ENOUGH, THE TWO OF YOU. - AND DON'T GET ME WRONG. 232 00:08:33,346 --> 00:08:35,983 IT'S NOT THAT DETECTIVE O'HARA HASN'T DONE A BANG-UP JOB 233 00:08:36,016 --> 00:08:38,852 JEZEBEL-ING HERSELF OUT TO HALF OF SANTA BARBARA. 234 00:08:38,886 --> 00:08:40,854 BUT IT WOULD APPEAR TO ME 235 00:08:40,888 --> 00:08:43,023 THAT YOU ARE DEALING PRIMARILY WITH CIRCUMSTANTIAL EVIDENCE. 236 00:08:43,056 --> 00:08:44,858 SO, CHIEF, YOU ARE GOING TO NEED ME TO COME IN HERE 237 00:08:44,892 --> 00:08:47,194 AND READ THESE MEN. - OR ASSAULT THEM. 238 00:08:47,227 --> 00:08:51,031 - PULLING NEEDLES OUT OF HAYSTACKS IS SHAWN'S SPECIALTY. 239 00:08:51,064 --> 00:08:53,000 SO... 240 00:08:53,033 --> 00:08:55,769 YOU CAN WORK TOGETHER ON THIS. 241 00:08:57,204 --> 00:08:59,239 - HEY, DUDE! 242 00:08:59,272 --> 00:09:01,041 WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? I NEED YOU. 243 00:09:01,074 --> 00:09:02,910 THERE'S MAJOR STUFF GOING DOWN ON THE JULES FRONT. 244 00:09:02,943 --> 00:09:04,311 YOU JUST ABANDON ME IN THE FIELD NOW? 245 00:09:04,344 --> 00:09:05,913 THAT'S YOUR NEW THING? 246 00:09:05,946 --> 00:09:07,080 WHAT? 247 00:09:07,114 --> 00:09:08,816 - SHAWN, THIS IS RACHEL. - HI. 248 00:09:08,849 --> 00:09:11,318 - RACHEL, THIS IS SHAWN. 249 00:09:11,351 --> 00:09:12,920 - AH, YES. 250 00:09:12,953 --> 00:09:14,855 YOUR THE GIRL FROM THE INTERNET 251 00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:16,957 WITH THE PICTURE IN THE THING. 252 00:09:16,990 --> 00:09:18,291 SHE KNOWS WHO I AM. 253 00:09:18,325 --> 00:09:19,927 - IS THIS A FRIEND OF YOURS? 254 00:09:19,960 --> 00:09:21,695 - FRIEND? BEST FRIENDS. 255 00:09:21,729 --> 00:09:22,930 FROM CHILDBIRTH. 256 00:09:22,963 --> 00:09:24,598 ACTUALLY, FROM BEFORE WE WERE BOTH BORN. 257 00:09:24,632 --> 00:09:25,999 WE TOOK OUR FIRST POOPS TOGETHER. 258 00:09:26,033 --> 00:09:27,267 - WHAT? 259 00:09:27,300 --> 00:09:28,969 - MINE WAS ADORABLE. HIS WAS WAY TOO FORMED. 260 00:09:29,002 --> 00:09:30,771 - SEE, I KNEW THERE WAS SOMETHING 261 00:09:30,804 --> 00:09:33,140 YOU WERE HOLDING OUT ON ME FROM THAT BABY ALBUM. 262 00:09:33,173 --> 00:09:35,142 - WAIT A MINUTE. HE SHOWED YOU HIS BABY ALBUM? 263 00:09:35,175 --> 00:09:36,677 - HE'S KIDDING. ABOUT THE POOP. 264 00:09:36,710 --> 00:09:38,078 HE KIDS, USUALLY INAPPROPRIATELY. 265 00:09:38,111 --> 00:09:39,980 - AS INAPPROPRIATE AS YOU LAST NIGHT, 266 00:09:40,013 --> 00:09:42,215 TELLING THAT WAITRESS SHE LOOKED A YOUNG ELEANOR ROOSEVELT? 267 00:09:42,249 --> 00:09:45,853 [laughter] 268 00:09:45,886 --> 00:09:47,821 - WELL, IT WAS LOADS OF FUN FOR EVERYONE. 269 00:09:47,855 --> 00:09:50,390 BUT, UH, GUS AND I HAVE TO ATTEND 270 00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:52,693 TO SOME SERIOUS MATTERS NOW, RACHEL. 271 00:09:52,726 --> 00:09:54,161 SO, IF YOU DON'T MIND... 272 00:09:54,194 --> 00:09:56,764 I MEAN, I DON'T KNOW IF YOU WALKED OR DROVE OR WHAT, 273 00:09:56,797 --> 00:09:58,999 BUT IT'S A LOVELY JAUNT DOWN THE BEACH PATH 274 00:09:59,032 --> 00:10:02,102 BACK TO WHEREVER IT WAS YOU CAME FROM. 275 00:10:02,135 --> 00:10:04,271 DID YOU HAVE A JACKET? - SHAWN. 276 00:10:04,304 --> 00:10:07,140 - I THINK THE DATE IS STILL GOING. 277 00:10:07,174 --> 00:10:08,809 [snaps fingers] - OH, I GET IT. 278 00:10:08,842 --> 00:10:11,945 YOU GUYS NEED TO SAY YOUR GOOD-BYES. OKAY. 279 00:10:11,979 --> 00:10:13,413 FIRST DATE, LAST DATE. I'LL WAIT. 280 00:10:13,446 --> 00:10:15,015 - I THINK THE FIRST DATE WAS LAST NIGHT, SHAWN. 281 00:10:15,048 --> 00:10:16,950 TECHNICALLY, THIS IS THE SECOND, NO? 282 00:10:16,984 --> 00:10:18,919 - TECHNICALLY, YOU WOULD BE RIGHT, 283 00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:23,691 SO, TECHNICALLY, THIS WOULDN'T BE INAPPROPRIATE. 284 00:10:25,726 --> 00:10:26,760 - MMM. 285 00:10:26,794 --> 00:10:28,095 - WAIT A MINUTE. 286 00:10:28,128 --> 00:10:30,130 YOU GUYS DIDN'T-- 287 00:10:30,163 --> 00:10:32,900 - WHAT? WHAT-- 288 00:10:35,302 --> 00:10:38,071 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? - I USED THE "DO IT" SYMBOL. 289 00:10:38,105 --> 00:10:40,073 DON'T WORRY. SHE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT MEANS. 290 00:10:40,107 --> 00:10:41,775 - I KNOW WHAT THE DO IT SYMBOL MEANS. 291 00:10:41,809 --> 00:10:43,243 I JUST HAVEN'T SEEN IT SINCE I WAS 12. 292 00:10:43,276 --> 00:10:45,112 THE QUESTION IS WHAT IS-- 293 00:10:45,145 --> 00:10:48,181 [laughs] WHAT IS THIS GESTURE SUPPOSED TO BE? 294 00:10:48,215 --> 00:10:50,117 - WHAT ARE YOU TELLING ME, MAN. 295 00:10:50,150 --> 00:10:51,952 THAT YOU'RE SERIOUSLY INTO THIS CHICK? 296 00:10:51,985 --> 00:10:53,153 - SHE IS AMAZING, SHAWN. 297 00:10:53,186 --> 00:10:55,756 SHE IS AMAZING AND BEAUTIFUL. 298 00:10:55,789 --> 00:10:57,090 - YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THIS GIRL. 299 00:10:57,124 --> 00:10:58,892 - I KNOW SHE WENT TO OXFORD, IS A NUTRITIONIST, 300 00:10:58,926 --> 00:11:00,460 AND SHE HAS A VOICE LIKE THE ANGELS 301 00:11:00,493 --> 00:11:02,062 FROM THE BRITISH HEAVENS. 302 00:11:02,095 --> 00:11:03,063 - BRITISH DON'T GET THEIR OWN HEAVEN. 303 00:11:03,096 --> 00:11:04,397 - SHE IS DIFFERENT, SHAWN. 304 00:11:04,431 --> 00:11:06,066 SHE'S NOT LIKE ANY OF THE OTHERS. 305 00:11:06,099 --> 00:11:07,200 - REALLY? BECAUSE THAT DOESN'T SEEM FAIR. 306 00:11:07,234 --> 00:11:10,203 - SHAWN, I THINK SHE COULD BE THE ONE. 307 00:11:10,237 --> 00:11:13,974 - WELL, I DON'T THINK SHE'S THE ONE FOR US. 308 00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:16,977 - REALLY? - [whines] 309 00:11:18,879 --> 00:11:20,047 OW! 310 00:11:20,080 --> 00:11:21,348 [click] 311 00:11:21,381 --> 00:11:24,351 GUS, DON'T BE THE "B" FROM APARTMENT 23! 312 00:11:24,384 --> 00:11:27,487 YOU'RE BETTER THAN THAT! WE'RE ALL BETTER THAN THAT! 313 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:30,090 AT LEAST, I THINK WE ARE. 314 00:11:31,024 --> 00:11:36,897 - [mouthing] 315 00:11:36,930 --> 00:11:39,332 - IS THERE ANYTHING I CAN DO FOR YOU, POP? 316 00:11:41,902 --> 00:11:43,503 - YOU WANNA HELP? 317 00:11:43,536 --> 00:11:45,372 GO CLEAN OUT THE GARAGE. 318 00:11:45,405 --> 00:11:47,174 - HOW ABOUT YOU LET ME BORROW THE TRUCK INSTEAD? 319 00:11:47,207 --> 00:11:49,843 - WHERE ARE YOU GOING? WHAT TIME ARE YOU GONNA BE BACK? 320 00:11:49,877 --> 00:11:51,979 - IT'S A DATE WITH JULES. - OH, THAT'S SO SWEET. 321 00:11:52,012 --> 00:11:53,914 HENRY, LET HIM BORROW THE TRUCK. 322 00:11:53,947 --> 00:11:55,315 WHERE ARE YOU TAKING HER? 323 00:11:55,348 --> 00:11:57,050 - OH, IT'S ACTUALLY NOT MY DATE. 324 00:11:57,084 --> 00:11:58,251 I HAVE TO GO TO A DATE 325 00:11:58,285 --> 00:12:00,988 THAT JULIET IS HAVING WITH ANOTHER DUDE. 326 00:12:01,021 --> 00:12:03,323 IT'S A LONG STORY, GUYS. IT'S COMPLICATED. 327 00:12:03,356 --> 00:12:05,092 BUT DON'T WORRY, THERE'S NO TOUCHING ABOVE THE KNEES 328 00:12:05,125 --> 00:12:07,928 AND ABSOLUTELY NONE OF THIS. 329 00:12:07,961 --> 00:12:10,964 - WHAT? IS THAT OPENING A CAN? 330 00:12:10,998 --> 00:12:14,167 - [laughs] MOM. EVERYBODY KNOWS WHAT THAT IS. 331 00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:18,238 - I WANT IT BACK BY MIDNIGHT. 332 00:12:18,271 --> 00:12:20,808 - WHAT AM I, CINDERELLA? - YOU WANT TO MAKE IT 11:30? 333 00:12:20,841 --> 00:12:22,776 - NO. 334 00:12:26,947 --> 00:12:29,082 - OH, HEY, MOM, WHAT TIME'S YOUR FLIGHT TOMORROW? 335 00:12:29,116 --> 00:12:31,018 I'LL TAKE YOU TO THE AIRPORT. - ACTUALLY, THOSE BAGS 336 00:12:31,051 --> 00:12:32,219 ARE GOING UPSTAIRS. YOUR MOTHER'S GONNA STICK AROUND 337 00:12:32,252 --> 00:12:33,954 FOR A LITTLE WHILE. 338 00:12:33,987 --> 00:12:35,322 - JUST FOR A WHILE. MAKE SURE YOU'RE OKAY. 339 00:12:35,355 --> 00:12:38,125 - I TOLD HER THAT I'LL BE FINE. 340 00:12:38,158 --> 00:12:40,928 - WHOA, WHOA, WHOA. YOU'RE MOVING IN? 341 00:12:40,961 --> 00:12:43,163 OH, MY GOD. 342 00:12:43,196 --> 00:12:46,066 I'M LIVING WITH MY PARENTS. 343 00:12:46,099 --> 00:12:49,870 [crowd murmuring] 344 00:12:55,142 --> 00:12:56,243 - ALL RIGHT, THE MOVIE SHOULD BE OUT. 345 00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:57,911 WE'RE BACK UP AND RUNNING. 346 00:12:57,945 --> 00:13:01,448 - ALL RIGHT. THIS IS WORK TIME. 347 00:13:01,481 --> 00:13:03,984 - I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU GOT THAT OUT OF ME. 348 00:13:04,017 --> 00:13:05,518 I USUALLY DON'T TELL PEOPLE I'M A MENSA MEMBER. 349 00:13:05,552 --> 00:13:07,387 AND THEY WON'T TO PLAY ME IN "WORDS WITH FRIENDS." 350 00:13:07,420 --> 00:13:10,090 - OH, I AM SO NOT INTIMIDATED BY THAT. 351 00:13:10,123 --> 00:13:11,524 I BET I COULD GIVE YOU A RUN FOR YOUR MONEY. 352 00:13:11,558 --> 00:13:13,360 - THERE'S A LOT OF HEAT COMING OFF THESE TWO. 353 00:13:13,393 --> 00:13:15,863 - JULES IS A MUCH BETTER ACTRESS THAN I GIVE HER CREDIT FOR... 354 00:13:15,896 --> 00:13:18,031 PRETENDING TO BE INTO THIS LORDAN JOKER--COME ON. 355 00:13:18,065 --> 00:13:19,232 - PLEASE, YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE IN THIS VAN 356 00:13:19,266 --> 00:13:21,001 WHO ISN'T INTO THIS GUY. 357 00:13:21,034 --> 00:13:22,335 - [flat] OH, HA, HA. 358 00:13:22,369 --> 00:13:23,971 - OH, COME ON. 359 00:13:24,004 --> 00:13:26,139 YOU KNOW THAT GIRLS ARE BETTER SPELLERS THAN GUYS. 360 00:13:26,173 --> 00:13:28,008 - REALLY? 'CAUSE I HAVE WON EVERY SPELLING BEE 361 00:13:28,041 --> 00:13:29,342 I HAVE EVER BEEN IN. 362 00:13:29,376 --> 00:13:30,911 - OH, SO YOU'RE A NERD. 363 00:13:30,944 --> 00:13:32,512 - SPELL "XYLOPHONE." - WOW. 364 00:13:32,545 --> 00:13:35,048 - "X"-- - WOW. 365 00:13:35,082 --> 00:13:37,284 SO THIS IS HOW YOU'RE GONNA PLAY MY BOY? 366 00:13:37,317 --> 00:13:38,886 - IS THAT GUSTER? 367 00:13:38,919 --> 00:13:40,153 YOU DIDN'T TELL GUSTER ABOUT THIS? 368 00:13:40,187 --> 00:13:42,089 HE'S GONNA RUIN THE WHOLE OPERATION. 369 00:13:42,122 --> 00:13:46,026 - UH, I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. 370 00:13:46,059 --> 00:13:48,361 [whispers] I DON'T KNOW WHO THIS IS, REALLY. 371 00:13:48,395 --> 00:13:50,964 - OH, OKAY. 372 00:13:50,998 --> 00:13:52,399 I SEE HOW THIS IS. 373 00:13:52,432 --> 00:13:54,101 GIRL, THAT IS COLD. 374 00:13:54,134 --> 00:13:55,635 AND IF I WASN'T ON A DATE MYSELF RIGHT NOW, 375 00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:59,940 WE WOULD BE HAVING WORDS. KNOW THAT. 376 00:13:59,973 --> 00:14:01,541 [slurps] 377 00:14:01,574 --> 00:14:03,110 - THAT'S MY BOY RIGHT THERE, SON. 378 00:14:03,143 --> 00:14:05,913 LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING. WHO-- 379 00:14:05,946 --> 00:14:08,481 WHO CAME UP WITH THESE PANIC CODE WORDS FOR JULES, HUH? 380 00:14:08,515 --> 00:14:12,219 "I FEEL HOT"? - WHAT WOULD YOU PREFER? 381 00:14:12,252 --> 00:14:14,654 - OH, I DON'T KNOW, HOW ABOUT SOMETHING SEMI-CONVERSATIONAL, 382 00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:16,089 LIKE "YOU HAVE A BUTT CHIN"? 383 00:14:16,123 --> 00:14:18,391 - WELL, HERE WE ARE. 384 00:14:18,425 --> 00:14:20,060 THE END OF THE DATE GOOD-BYE. 385 00:14:20,093 --> 00:14:21,461 - MMM. 386 00:14:21,494 --> 00:14:24,531 - NOW I KNOW THAT THIS IS A BIT STRANGE, 387 00:14:24,564 --> 00:14:25,933 BUT I HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU. 388 00:14:25,966 --> 00:14:26,967 - OH? - OKAY. 389 00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:29,202 NOW I NEED YOU TO TURN AROUND. 390 00:14:29,236 --> 00:14:32,072 - OH, NO. - COME ON, COME ON. 391 00:14:32,105 --> 00:14:34,374 - SURPRISE. - JUST PLAY ALONG...PLAY ALONG. 392 00:14:34,407 --> 00:14:36,209 - SHE NEEDS US. LET'S BOUNCE. 393 00:14:36,243 --> 00:14:37,444 - NO, NO, NO. HOLD UP. 394 00:14:37,477 --> 00:14:39,012 SHE KNOWS WHAT SHE'S DOING. 395 00:14:39,046 --> 00:14:41,048 WE GO OUT TO SOON, WE BLOW HER COVER. 396 00:14:41,081 --> 00:14:42,916 - COME ON, COME ON, JUST PLAY ALONG. 397 00:14:42,950 --> 00:14:44,051 THAT'S RIGHT. THERE YOU GO. 398 00:14:44,084 --> 00:14:46,286 - YOU KNOW WHAT? I-- - UH-UH-UH-UH. 399 00:14:46,319 --> 00:14:48,989 YOU'RE GONNA RUIN THE SURPRISE. 400 00:14:49,022 --> 00:14:51,124 OKAY. 401 00:14:51,158 --> 00:14:53,160 NOW, CLOSE YOUR EYES. 402 00:14:58,665 --> 00:15:01,668 - YOU KNOW WHAT? I FEEL HOT. 403 00:15:01,701 --> 00:15:04,972 VERY HOT. 404 00:15:05,005 --> 00:15:06,339 - [grunts] 405 00:15:08,408 --> 00:15:10,210 - GET OUTTA THE WAY! 406 00:15:10,243 --> 00:15:12,045 [overlapping shouting] 407 00:15:20,153 --> 00:15:22,455 [background chatter, commotion] 408 00:15:22,489 --> 00:15:23,991 - YAH! - HEY! 409 00:15:24,024 --> 00:15:25,993 - A NECKLACE? 410 00:15:26,026 --> 00:15:28,095 - YOU SAID ON YOUR PROFILE THAT YOU LIKED TURTLES. 411 00:15:28,128 --> 00:15:29,963 - [laughs] - IT LOOKS JUST LIKE THE ONES 412 00:15:29,997 --> 00:15:32,132 I SAW ON MY TRIP TO THE GALAPAGOS ISLANDS. 413 00:15:32,165 --> 00:15:35,702 - WOW, THAT IS UNEXPECTED. - I KNOW, I KNOW. 414 00:15:35,735 --> 00:15:38,471 SO YOU SAID YOU WERE FEELING HOT? 415 00:15:38,505 --> 00:15:40,173 - OH, YEAH, I, UH-- 416 00:15:40,207 --> 00:15:42,475 UH, I AM FEELING COLD! 417 00:15:42,509 --> 00:15:45,312 I AM FEELING REALLY COLD. 418 00:15:45,345 --> 00:15:47,747 - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? GET YOUR MEAT HOOKS OFF OF ME. 419 00:15:47,780 --> 00:15:49,349 - YOU WANT TO BLOW HER COVER? PUT YOUR ARMS AROUND ME. 420 00:15:49,382 --> 00:15:53,020 COME ON, SELL IT! 421 00:15:53,053 --> 00:15:54,354 RUB MY BACK AT A MEDIUM PACE. 422 00:15:56,123 --> 00:15:57,657 - YOU'RE AN IDIOT. - MAKE IT TENDER. 423 00:15:57,690 --> 00:15:59,993 - I'M BEING TENDER! 424 00:16:00,027 --> 00:16:03,163 - WAIT. THIS JUST IN. 425 00:16:03,196 --> 00:16:04,231 - OH. 426 00:16:04,264 --> 00:16:06,099 - LOVE IS IN THE AIR, HUH? 427 00:16:06,133 --> 00:16:08,101 - HA. YEAH. SOMETHING. 428 00:16:08,135 --> 00:16:09,769 SOMETHING'S IN THE AIR. 429 00:16:09,802 --> 00:16:11,171 - BEAT YOU WITHIN AN INCH OF YOUR LIFE 430 00:16:11,204 --> 00:16:13,073 WHEN THIS IS OVER. 431 00:16:13,106 --> 00:16:14,707 [door opens] - HOW WAS THE DATE? 432 00:16:14,741 --> 00:16:16,343 - WELL, UH... 433 00:16:16,376 --> 00:16:18,411 JULIET'S GUY TURNED OUT TO NOT BE A SERIAL KILLER, 434 00:16:18,445 --> 00:16:20,113 SO THAT WAS A BUZZKILL. 435 00:16:20,147 --> 00:16:22,449 BUT I DID GET A LITTLE ACTION OFF LASSITER, 436 00:16:22,482 --> 00:16:24,084 YOU KNOW, OVER THE CLOTHES. 437 00:16:24,117 --> 00:16:25,518 MIDDLE-SCHOOL STYLE. 438 00:16:25,552 --> 00:16:27,220 - COME SIT. 439 00:16:27,254 --> 00:16:28,588 - GUYS... [TV playing] 440 00:16:28,621 --> 00:16:30,357 I THINK WE NEED TO TALK. 441 00:16:30,390 --> 00:16:34,527 THIS IS NOT A NORMAL SITUATION. YOU SEE THAT? 442 00:16:34,561 --> 00:16:37,764 I DON'T SEE HOW ALL OF US LIVING TOGETHER IS GONNA WORK. 443 00:16:37,797 --> 00:16:39,432 YOU'RE DIVORCED. 444 00:16:39,466 --> 00:16:41,434 I'M IN MY 30s. 445 00:16:41,468 --> 00:16:42,802 IT'S WEIRD. 446 00:16:42,835 --> 00:16:47,207 YOU GUYS CAN SEE THAT... [mood music over TV] 447 00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:49,609 IS THAT THE BOY WHO COULD FLY? 448 00:16:49,642 --> 00:16:53,146 [grunts] 449 00:16:53,180 --> 00:16:56,383 NOBODY UNDERSTOOD HIM BUT MILLY. 450 00:16:56,416 --> 00:16:59,786 AND THEN HE JUST FLEW AWAY... 451 00:16:59,819 --> 00:17:02,122 INTO THE CLOUDS. 452 00:17:02,155 --> 00:17:03,590 YOU KNOW... 453 00:17:03,623 --> 00:17:06,326 SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE THAT LITTLE BOY. 454 00:17:06,359 --> 00:17:07,460 - I DID SOME OF YOUR LAUNDRY TODAY. 455 00:17:07,494 --> 00:17:08,795 IT'S ON YOUR BED. 456 00:17:08,828 --> 00:17:10,297 - MOM, THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. 457 00:17:10,330 --> 00:17:12,132 I DON'T NEED YOU TO DO MY LAUNDRY. 458 00:17:12,165 --> 00:17:13,766 - BUT I COULDN'T REMEMBER IF YOU LIKED YOUR SOCKS FOLDED 459 00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:15,402 OR ROLLED INTO BALLS. - I LIKE MY SOCKS IN BALLS. 460 00:17:15,435 --> 00:17:18,037 - I DID BALLS. - WELL, THAT'S FORTUITOUS. 461 00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:24,111 FLY, ERIC... 462 00:17:24,144 --> 00:17:26,313 FLY. 463 00:17:26,346 --> 00:17:31,151 - UH, O'HARA, SPENCER, THIS IS MR. FIELDING MELLISH. 464 00:17:31,184 --> 00:17:33,353 HE IS A TECHNICAL REP FROM SOULMATECONNECTION.COM 465 00:17:33,386 --> 00:17:35,455 WHO'S GONNA HELP US TRACK OUR PROFILES 466 00:17:35,488 --> 00:17:37,790 AND THE CORRESPONDENCE OF OUR SUSPECTS. 467 00:17:37,824 --> 00:17:40,427 - HI, MR. MELLISH. I'M DETECTIVE O'HARA. 468 00:17:40,460 --> 00:17:42,795 AND YOU MAY NOT RECOGNIZE ME, BUT I'M ALSO HELENE, 469 00:17:42,829 --> 00:17:45,098 THE UNDERCOVER DECOY WORKING THE CASE. 470 00:17:45,132 --> 00:17:46,199 - I THINK I'M CAUGHT UP. 471 00:17:46,233 --> 00:17:47,767 - SWEET. I'M SHAWN SPENCER. 472 00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:50,103 I'LL BE PLAYING MYSELF THE WHOLE TIME. 473 00:17:50,137 --> 00:17:53,140 - UH, NOW THAT LORDAN IS LESS PROBABLE, 474 00:17:53,173 --> 00:17:55,508 OUR NEXT LIKELY OF THE SIX ORIGINAL SUSPECTS 475 00:17:55,542 --> 00:17:58,878 GOES ON THE SITE WITH THE NAME OF "MR. POSSIBILITIES." 476 00:17:58,911 --> 00:18:02,115 CAN YOU PULL HIM UP, PLEASE? 477 00:18:02,149 --> 00:18:05,185 - MR. POSSIBILITIES? TRY "MR. PERFECT." 478 00:18:05,218 --> 00:18:06,786 - WOW, HE LOOKS LIKE A MALE MODEL. 479 00:18:06,819 --> 00:18:08,255 - I WAS A HAND MODEL. 480 00:18:08,288 --> 00:18:10,823 YOU WANT TO BUY THIS PEN? NO? 481 00:18:10,857 --> 00:18:12,892 NOW YOU DO. 482 00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:15,362 - OH, HE'S ALSO AN ART DEALER, A SKI INSTRUCTOR, 483 00:18:15,395 --> 00:18:18,131 AND HE RUNS HIS OWN NON-PROFIT CHILDREN'S CHARITY. 484 00:18:18,165 --> 00:18:19,899 - AND, UM, THIS GUY'S SINGLE? 485 00:18:19,932 --> 00:18:24,604 WOW, I REALLY MISSED OUT ON THIS ONLINE THING. 486 00:18:24,637 --> 00:18:28,375 AND I AM GONNA LET YOU GET BACK TO WORK. 487 00:18:28,408 --> 00:18:31,344 OKAY... [titters] THANK YOU. 488 00:18:31,378 --> 00:18:34,747 - SO YOU WROTE TO THIS GUY FOUR TIMES 489 00:18:34,781 --> 00:18:37,317 UNDER YOUR COVER PROFILE. 490 00:18:37,350 --> 00:18:38,785 - YES, AND I CANNOT GET A DATE WITH HIM! 491 00:18:38,818 --> 00:18:41,188 - EASY THERE, "DEBBIE DOES SANTA BARBARA." 492 00:18:41,221 --> 00:18:42,889 - LISTEN, IF YOU ASK ME, 493 00:18:42,922 --> 00:18:44,424 I THINK YOUR PROFILE NEEDS SOME SPRUCING UP. 494 00:18:44,457 --> 00:18:47,794 - SPRUCING UP? - WELL, YEAH. 495 00:18:47,827 --> 00:18:50,397 YOU SEEM SORT OF MIDDLE OF THE ROAD. 496 00:18:50,430 --> 00:18:52,199 I MEAN, WHO LISTS THE MENTALIST 497 00:18:52,232 --> 00:18:53,933 AS ONE OF THEIR FAVORITE TV SHOWS? 498 00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:55,235 YOU NEED TO GET MORE SPICY. 499 00:18:55,268 --> 00:18:56,703 - WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT? 500 00:18:56,736 --> 00:18:58,171 WHY WOULD YOU MAKE FUN OF THE MENTALIST? 501 00:18:58,205 --> 00:18:59,772 - I-I DON'T REALLY-- - I'M SERIOUS. 502 00:18:59,806 --> 00:19:01,808 WHY WOULD YOU POSSIBLY TAKE A SHOT AT THAT SHOW? 503 00:19:01,841 --> 00:19:03,876 - I-I'VE NEVER ACTUALLY SEEN IT. 504 00:19:03,910 --> 00:19:06,879 - OKAY. - I'LL CHECK IT OUT. 505 00:19:06,913 --> 00:19:09,282 YOU HAVE TO TAILOR-MAKE YOUR PROFILE 506 00:19:09,316 --> 00:19:10,883 TO ATTRACT THIS MR. POSSIBILITIES. 507 00:19:10,917 --> 00:19:13,253 - WHAT WILL IT TAKE? 508 00:19:13,286 --> 00:19:15,655 - I THINK WE'RE LOOKING AT A COMPLETE OVERHAUL HERE. 509 00:19:15,688 --> 00:19:17,424 I MEAN, WE'RE NOT TRYING TO ATTRACT 510 00:19:17,457 --> 00:19:21,628 A 30-SOMETHING-YEAR-OLD GUY WHO LIVES WITH HIS PARENTS. 511 00:19:21,661 --> 00:19:23,896 - THAT IS SO TRUE. 512 00:19:23,930 --> 00:19:25,732 - PATHETIC. 513 00:19:25,765 --> 00:19:27,234 - WELL, I HAVE TO SAY, THIS IS THE FIRST TIME 514 00:19:27,267 --> 00:19:28,968 I'VE EVER BEEN FINGERPRINTED ON A DATE. 515 00:19:29,001 --> 00:19:31,504 - MA'AM, JUST KEEP COOPERATING. 516 00:19:31,538 --> 00:19:34,507 OR I'LL HAVE TO TAKE YOU BACK INTO THE INTERROGATION ROOM. 517 00:19:34,541 --> 00:19:37,744 - GUS! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? - I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF A DATE. 518 00:19:37,777 --> 00:19:40,280 - HOW CAN THIS POSSIBLY STILL BE GOING ON? 519 00:19:40,313 --> 00:19:41,981 - HE'S BOOKING ME. 520 00:19:42,014 --> 00:19:44,484 - SOME OF US ARE IN THERE DOING REAL DETECTIVE WORK-- 521 00:19:44,517 --> 00:19:45,918 THERE, IN THE CONFERENCE ROOM-- 522 00:19:45,952 --> 00:19:49,989 WHILE YOU TWO ARE ACTING LIKE CHILDREN, OUT HERE. 523 00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:51,924 WHAT? 524 00:19:51,958 --> 00:19:53,426 THIS IS MY LUNCH. 525 00:19:53,460 --> 00:19:55,262 WHICH WAS PACKED FOR ME BY MY MOTHER. 526 00:19:55,295 --> 00:19:57,264 [bag rustles] IT IS CLEARLY LABELED "GOOSE," 527 00:19:57,297 --> 00:19:59,966 AND NOW IT CANNOT BE STOLEN, WHICH HAPPENS. 528 00:19:59,999 --> 00:20:03,436 EVEN HERE AT A POLICE STATION. 529 00:20:04,904 --> 00:20:07,474 - [sighs] HI, SHAWN. 530 00:20:07,507 --> 00:20:08,775 WHAT DO YOU THINK? 531 00:20:08,808 --> 00:20:10,810 - UH...YOU... 532 00:20:10,843 --> 00:20:12,579 LOOK LIKE YOU'RE LATE 533 00:20:12,612 --> 00:20:14,481 FOR A WHITESNAKE VIDEO SHOOT. 534 00:20:14,514 --> 00:20:15,948 - SHAWN, RELAX. 535 00:20:15,982 --> 00:20:17,817 I DON'T ACTUALLY WANT TO DATE ANY OF THESE GUYS. 536 00:20:17,850 --> 00:20:19,852 I'M TRYING TO SOLVE A MURDER. 537 00:20:19,886 --> 00:20:21,321 - HELENE? 538 00:20:21,354 --> 00:20:22,822 - LORDAN. 539 00:20:22,855 --> 00:20:24,657 - COME ON. THIS GUY? 540 00:20:24,691 --> 00:20:27,760 HE'S A LAME-CHOP SLATHERED IN FAIL SAUCE. 541 00:20:27,794 --> 00:20:28,961 - HEY, DID YOU GET THE FLOWERS I SENT? 542 00:20:28,995 --> 00:20:31,664 - YES, YES, UM, I DID. 543 00:20:31,698 --> 00:20:34,401 THEY WERE GORGEOUS. THANK YOU. 544 00:20:34,434 --> 00:20:35,802 - THIS GUY HAS BEEN ELIMINATED AS A SUSPECT. 545 00:20:35,835 --> 00:20:36,969 THEREFORE, THERE IS NO NEED FOR FLIRTATION. 546 00:20:37,003 --> 00:20:38,905 - ELIMINATED? 547 00:20:38,938 --> 00:20:40,773 SHAWN, JUST BECAUSE HE DIDN'T KILL ME AT THE TIME 548 00:20:40,807 --> 00:20:42,309 DOESN'T MEAN HE DOESN'T WANT TO. - YOU'RE RIGHT. OKAY. 549 00:20:42,342 --> 00:20:43,810 WE DO THIS TOGETHER. I'M YOUR WINGMAN. 550 00:20:43,843 --> 00:20:46,346 - SHAWN, I DON'T NEED A WINGMAN. LAY BACK. 551 00:20:46,379 --> 00:20:48,481 - WHO'S THIS? - A FRIEND. 552 00:20:48,515 --> 00:20:49,816 - FRIEND, REALLY. THAT'S ME. 553 00:20:49,849 --> 00:20:50,950 [stutters] I'M AT FRIEND STATUS? 554 00:20:50,983 --> 00:20:52,752 - YES, WHAT ELSE WOULD YOU BE, SHAWN? 555 00:20:52,785 --> 00:20:54,987 - WHAT IS THAT? IS THAT A SUIT FOR A SCHOOL PICTURE? 556 00:20:55,021 --> 00:20:56,823 - [chuckles] NO. 557 00:20:56,856 --> 00:21:00,527 EVERY TIME I CLOSE A BIG DEAL, I BUY MYSELF A SUIT. 558 00:21:00,560 --> 00:21:01,961 I'M IN THE COMMERCIAL REAL ESTATE BUSINESS. 559 00:21:01,994 --> 00:21:04,864 I BUILD SKYSCRAPERS. WHAT BUSINESS ARE YOU IN? 560 00:21:04,897 --> 00:21:06,999 - I'M A PSYCHIC, JACK. AND I BUILD... 561 00:21:07,033 --> 00:21:08,868 SWEDISH FURNITURE. 562 00:21:08,901 --> 00:21:10,837 - AND HE LIVES WITH HIS PARENTS. 563 00:21:10,870 --> 00:21:13,340 - THEY'RE OLD AND FRAIL, AND I HAVE TO CARE FOR THEM. 564 00:21:13,373 --> 00:21:14,541 AND ONE OF THEM HAS A COLOSTOMY BAG. 565 00:21:14,574 --> 00:21:16,042 - OH. 566 00:21:16,075 --> 00:21:17,744 - HEY, GOOSE! COME TRY THESE ON. 567 00:21:17,777 --> 00:21:20,847 I WANT TO SEE HOW THEY FIT IN YOUR SEAT. 568 00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:23,916 - LOOK, I REALLY APPRECIATE THE RIDE OVER HERE 569 00:21:23,950 --> 00:21:26,018 BUT I AM IN THE MIDDLE [softly] OF AN INVESTIGATION. 570 00:21:26,052 --> 00:21:27,654 - WELL, AT LEAST HOLD THIS UP TO YOUR SHOULDERS 571 00:21:27,687 --> 00:21:29,389 SO I CAN SEE ABOUT THE SLEEVE LENGTH. 572 00:21:29,422 --> 00:21:30,523 - MOM, DO YOU HEAR WHAT I JUST SAID? 573 00:21:30,557 --> 00:21:32,425 I'M INVESTIGATING A MUR-- 574 00:21:32,459 --> 00:21:34,327 OH, LOOK AT THAT. THAT IS NICE. 575 00:21:34,361 --> 00:21:35,862 - DO YOU WANT TO GO OUT AGAIN SOMETIME? 576 00:21:35,895 --> 00:21:38,531 - NO. UM... 577 00:21:38,565 --> 00:21:41,000 LOOK, LORDAN, YOU ARE... 578 00:21:41,033 --> 00:21:42,602 WONDERFUL. 579 00:21:42,635 --> 00:21:44,937 BUT I'M NOT YOUR GIRL. 580 00:21:44,971 --> 00:21:48,074 THAT'S ACTUALLY MY EX, AND... 581 00:21:48,107 --> 00:21:49,609 WE'RE TRYING TO GET BACK TOGETHER. 582 00:21:49,642 --> 00:21:51,911 - REALLY? THAT GUY? 583 00:21:51,944 --> 00:21:53,913 - THAT'S HIS MOM. 584 00:21:53,946 --> 00:21:56,549 - HE'S A LUCKY GUY. 585 00:21:56,583 --> 00:21:57,750 GOOD LUCK, HELENE. 586 00:21:57,784 --> 00:22:00,553 - THANK YOU. 587 00:22:00,587 --> 00:22:04,857 YOU KNOW, YOU'RE GONNA MAKE A REALLY HANDSOME BABY-DADDY. 588 00:22:04,891 --> 00:22:06,593 YEAH. 589 00:22:06,626 --> 00:22:08,861 SO BYE, [giggles] YOU KNOW... 590 00:22:08,895 --> 00:22:12,899 WHOA, YEP, THAT'S THERE. FOR NOW. 591 00:22:12,932 --> 00:22:15,468 - SEE YOU. - WHAT THE HELL IS ALL OF THAT? 592 00:22:15,502 --> 00:22:17,970 I KNOW WHAT THIS IS ABOUT. IT'S NOT ABOUT THIS DUDE. 593 00:22:18,004 --> 00:22:20,873 THIS IS ABOUT YOU COMPETING WITH THOSE GIRLS 594 00:22:20,907 --> 00:22:22,875 THAT MR. POSSIBILITIES DID GO OUT WITH. 595 00:22:22,909 --> 00:22:24,110 - WHAT IS IT? 596 00:22:24,143 --> 00:22:26,479 AM I NOT AS ATTRACTIVE? 597 00:22:26,513 --> 00:22:27,914 IS THAT WHAT IT IS? - I DON'T KNOW, JULES. 598 00:22:27,947 --> 00:22:29,449 THOSE GIRLS ARE DEAD. 599 00:22:29,482 --> 00:22:32,485 YOU ARE COMPETING WITH GIRLS WHO WERE MURDERED. 600 00:22:32,519 --> 00:22:35,922 - SO THAT'S IT. SO I'M--I'M NOT AS ATTRACTIVE. 601 00:22:35,955 --> 00:22:38,525 WOW, IT KIND OF MAKES ME HATE THOSE GIRLS. 602 00:22:38,558 --> 00:22:40,927 - THE DEAD GIRLS. THE MURDERED GIRLS. 603 00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:42,662 - YEAH, YOU'RE RIGHT, IT'S KIND OF INAPPROPRIATE 604 00:22:42,695 --> 00:22:44,497 AND DISRESPECTFUL THAT I SAID THAT. 605 00:22:44,531 --> 00:22:48,568 - ACTUALLY, IT'S GREAT THAT YOU JUST SAID THAT. 606 00:22:48,601 --> 00:22:49,969 HANG WITH ME, MELLISH. I KNOW YOU CAN. 607 00:22:50,002 --> 00:22:51,671 WE HAVE BEEN CONCENTRATING THIS WHOLE TIME 608 00:22:51,704 --> 00:22:53,806 ON THE MEN THESE WOMEN ARE DATING. 609 00:22:53,840 --> 00:22:55,675 BUT WHAT IF, WHAT IF... 610 00:22:55,708 --> 00:22:57,410 IT'S ONE OF THE OTHER WOMEN. 611 00:22:57,444 --> 00:22:58,511 ONE WHO'S JEALOUS. 612 00:22:58,545 --> 00:23:00,012 - WOMEN. 613 00:23:00,046 --> 00:23:02,915 WHEN THEY SMELL YOUR PHEROMONES, THEIR CLAWS COME OUT. 614 00:23:02,949 --> 00:23:03,950 SEEN IT FIRSTHAND. 615 00:23:03,983 --> 00:23:05,652 - I BET YOU HAVE. 616 00:23:05,685 --> 00:23:07,720 YOU STRIKE ME AS A REAL SWORDSMAN. 617 00:23:07,754 --> 00:23:09,422 - WELL, I WAS A FENCER IN HIGH SCHOOL. 618 00:23:09,456 --> 00:23:10,823 - THAT'S NOT WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. 619 00:23:10,857 --> 00:23:12,425 BUT, SERIOUSLY, WHAT IF ONE OF THESE WOMEN 620 00:23:12,459 --> 00:23:14,427 IS LITERALLY KILLING OFF HER COMPETITION? 621 00:23:14,461 --> 00:23:16,596 - I'M DOING A SEARCH RIGHT NOW 622 00:23:16,629 --> 00:23:18,865 OF ALL CORRESPONDENCES WITH "MR. POSSIBILITIES." 623 00:23:18,898 --> 00:23:21,468 THERE WERE SEVERAL WOMEN WHO WROTE TO HIM 624 00:23:21,501 --> 00:23:24,170 BUT ONE WOMAN WROTE TO HIM MULTIPLE, MULTIPLE TIMES 625 00:23:24,203 --> 00:23:25,805 WITH NO RESPONSE. 626 00:23:25,838 --> 00:23:26,973 HA. WOW. 627 00:23:27,006 --> 00:23:28,541 THIS CHICK REALLY WENT OFF THE CHARTS 628 00:23:28,575 --> 00:23:30,042 TO GET THIS GUY. - [chortles] 629 00:23:30,076 --> 00:23:31,811 - KIND OF CREEPY. 630 00:23:31,844 --> 00:23:33,746 EVEN FOR CREEPY ONLINE-DATING PEOPLE. 631 00:23:33,780 --> 00:23:36,516 - BINGO. WHO IS SHE? 632 00:23:36,549 --> 00:23:40,186 [tense music] 633 00:23:40,219 --> 00:23:42,088 - UH-OH. 634 00:23:45,558 --> 00:23:46,826 - SEE, IT'S ALL ABOUT THE FOLLOW-THROUGH. 635 00:23:46,859 --> 00:23:47,994 - YOU'VE DONE THIS MOVE BEFORE? 636 00:23:48,027 --> 00:23:50,029 - FIRST TIME, ACTUALLY. IS IT WORKING? 637 00:23:50,062 --> 00:23:51,731 - WELL, LET'S SEE IF I MAKE THIS SHOT. 638 00:23:51,764 --> 00:23:53,466 - HMM. - FORE! 639 00:23:53,500 --> 00:23:55,902 - OH! - HA! 640 00:23:55,935 --> 00:23:57,670 SORRY ABOUT THAT! 641 00:23:57,704 --> 00:23:59,939 THE MOUTH ON THAT EVIL CLOWN HEAD 642 00:23:59,972 --> 00:24:02,208 IS SO MUCH WIDER THAN I THOUGHT. 643 00:24:02,241 --> 00:24:03,776 - SHAWN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 644 00:24:03,810 --> 00:24:05,244 - DON'T WORRY, GUS. I COME IN PEACE. 645 00:24:05,277 --> 00:24:08,080 I'M HERE TO APOLOGIZE-- NOT TO YOU, BUT TO RACHEL. 646 00:24:08,114 --> 00:24:10,683 CLEARLY, YOU AND I GOT OFF ON THE WRONG FOOT, 647 00:24:10,717 --> 00:24:12,785 OR WHATEVER YOU GUYS CALL IT "ACROSS THE POND." 648 00:24:12,819 --> 00:24:14,521 - WE CALL IT A FOOT. 649 00:24:14,554 --> 00:24:16,022 - WELL, IT WAS MY FAULT, AND I'D LIKE TO START OVER. 650 00:24:16,055 --> 00:24:17,790 - WELL, THAT'S BIG OF YOU. ME TOO. 651 00:24:17,824 --> 00:24:18,858 - RACHEL, YOU SEEM LIKE A VERY SWEET GIRL 652 00:24:18,891 --> 00:24:20,760 WITH A LOT OF LOVE TO GIVE. 653 00:24:20,793 --> 00:24:21,894 - THANK YOU, SHAWN. 654 00:24:21,928 --> 00:24:23,563 THAT'S VERY GENEROUS OF YOU TO SAY. 655 00:24:23,596 --> 00:24:25,031 - UNFORTUNATELY, YOU ARE ALSO A SERIAL KILLER. 656 00:24:25,064 --> 00:24:26,933 THAT'S RIGHT, GUS. A KILLER OF WOMEN-- 657 00:24:26,966 --> 00:24:28,635 AT LEAST TWO-- WITH BLONDE HAIR. 658 00:24:28,668 --> 00:24:30,102 - NO, NO, NO. 659 00:24:30,136 --> 00:24:31,938 YOU WILL NOT DO THIS AGAIN, SHAWN. 660 00:24:31,971 --> 00:24:33,239 YOU WILL NOT TAKE THIS BEAUTIFUL, BUDDING RELATIONSHIP 661 00:24:33,272 --> 00:24:35,041 AND DESTROY IT BY ACCUSING THE GIRL OF MURDER. 662 00:24:35,074 --> 00:24:36,876 NOT AGAIN. NOT THIS TIME. 663 00:24:36,909 --> 00:24:38,811 - THIS HAS HAPPENED BEFORE? - ONCE OR TWICE, YES. 664 00:24:38,845 --> 00:24:40,012 - LOOK, GUS, I DIDN'T PICK HER. 665 00:24:40,046 --> 00:24:41,948 I CAN'T HELP IT IF SHE LIKES TO KILL. 666 00:24:41,981 --> 00:24:43,215 - SHAWN, WHILE YOU'RE ACCUSING MY GIRLFRIEND OF MURDER, 667 00:24:43,249 --> 00:24:44,717 THERE'S A REAL SERIAL KILLER OUT THERE, 668 00:24:44,751 --> 00:24:46,218 MAYBE GETTING READY TO KILL AGAIN. 669 00:24:46,252 --> 00:24:47,787 - WAIT, DID YOU JUST CALL ME YOUR GIRLFRIEND? 670 00:24:47,820 --> 00:24:50,590 - I'M SORRY. - NO, DON'T BE. 671 00:24:50,623 --> 00:24:53,926 - YOU WANTED A DATE WITH MR. POSSIBILITIES. 672 00:24:53,960 --> 00:24:55,094 REMEMBER HIM? YOU SHOULD. 673 00:24:55,127 --> 00:24:56,228 YOU WROTE TO HIM OVER EIGHT TIMES 674 00:24:56,262 --> 00:24:57,797 IN A PERIOD OF THREE WEEKS. 675 00:24:57,830 --> 00:25:00,266 EACH TIME HE REJECTED YOU, YOU GOT JEALOUS, 676 00:25:00,299 --> 00:25:02,034 AND YOU WENT AFTER THOSE TWO WOMEN, 677 00:25:02,068 --> 00:25:03,903 WHO WERE ABLE TO CAPTURE HIS ATTENTION, FOR REVENGE. 678 00:25:03,936 --> 00:25:06,005 BECAUSE IF YOU COULDN'T HAVE HIM, NO ONE COULD. 679 00:25:06,038 --> 00:25:07,173 AM I RIGHT? 680 00:25:07,206 --> 00:25:08,274 - WAIT, YOU WROTE TO SOME WHITE DUDE, 681 00:25:08,307 --> 00:25:09,909 LIKE, EIGHT TIMES? 682 00:25:09,942 --> 00:25:11,711 - YOU'RE A PSYCHIC AND YOU MAKE MONEY OFF OF THIS? 683 00:25:11,744 --> 00:25:13,012 - IT'S VERY SIMPLE, RACHEL. 684 00:25:13,045 --> 00:25:14,714 JUST PROVE TO ME THAT YOU HAVE AN ALIBI 685 00:25:14,747 --> 00:25:16,015 FOR THE NIGHT OF THE FIRST MURDER--APRIL 11TH, AT 9:00 P.M. 686 00:25:16,048 --> 00:25:17,884 AND Y STAY OUT OF IT. 687 00:25:17,917 --> 00:25:20,553 DO NOT BE THE TOM SELLECK TO HER PAULINA PORIZKOVA. 688 00:25:20,587 --> 00:25:22,822 - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? - FROM HER ALIBI, 1989. 689 00:25:22,855 --> 00:25:24,957 ROTTEN TOMATOMETER--15%. 690 00:25:24,991 --> 00:25:26,859 - AUDIENCE METER--38%. 691 00:25:26,893 --> 00:25:27,894 - IF ANYTHING, GUS WOULD BE MY JAMES FARENTINO. 692 00:25:27,927 --> 00:25:29,762 - WHO'S THAT? 693 00:25:29,796 --> 00:25:30,897 SOME OTHER WHITE DUDE YOU TRIED TO GET A DATE WITH? 694 00:25:30,930 --> 00:25:33,132 - THIS IS ME RECEIVING AN AWARD 695 00:25:33,165 --> 00:25:35,702 FOR A SCHOOL NUTRITIONAL PROGRAM I INITIATED. 696 00:25:35,735 --> 00:25:38,270 LOOK AT THE TIME STAMP. - 7:30 P.M.? SO WHAT? 697 00:25:38,304 --> 00:25:41,073 WE'RE TO BELIEVE THAT YOU GAVE A SPEECH ABOUT NUTRITION 698 00:25:41,107 --> 00:25:43,042 THAT LASTED AN HOUR AND A HALF? 699 00:25:43,075 --> 00:25:44,644 YOU COULD HAVE BEEN ANYWHERE YOU WANTED IN THIS CITY 700 00:25:44,677 --> 00:25:46,278 IN 20 MINUTES. - I WASN'T IN SANTA BARBARA. 701 00:25:46,312 --> 00:25:48,014 I WAS IN NEW YORK. 702 00:25:48,047 --> 00:25:50,082 THIS IS ME IN FRONT OF THE STATUE OF LIBERTY. 703 00:25:50,116 --> 00:25:52,084 - OKAY, LOOK, OBVIOUSLY I'M GONNA HAVE 704 00:25:52,118 --> 00:25:55,354 TO VERIFY ALL THIS INFORMATION DOWN AT THE STATION. 705 00:25:55,387 --> 00:25:57,690 BUT, FOR NOW, IT WOULD APPEAR THAT YOU'RE OKAY TO... 706 00:25:57,724 --> 00:25:58,825 KEEP PUTTING. 707 00:25:58,858 --> 00:26:00,793 JUST DON'T TRY TO SKIP TOWN. 708 00:26:00,827 --> 00:26:01,994 - YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF. 709 00:26:02,028 --> 00:26:03,963 - WELL, I AM. 710 00:26:03,996 --> 00:26:05,865 IF IT'S ALL RIGHT WITH YOU, I'M JUST GONNA-- 711 00:26:05,898 --> 00:26:09,268 JUST GONNA PLAY THROUGH. 712 00:26:14,206 --> 00:26:15,708 HEY, JULES. 713 00:26:15,742 --> 00:26:16,776 HEY, I JUST ACCUSED GUS' GIRLFRIEND 714 00:26:16,809 --> 00:26:18,077 OF BEING A SERIAL KILLER, 715 00:26:18,110 --> 00:26:20,146 AND NOW I'M PLAYING MINI GOLF BY MYSELF. 716 00:26:20,179 --> 00:26:22,949 AND I JUST FEEL LIKE I MAY BE GOING DOWN A BAD PATH. 717 00:26:22,982 --> 00:26:24,884 SO LET'S MAKE THIS A DATE NIGHT, SHALL WE? 718 00:26:24,917 --> 00:26:26,252 - OOH, SHAWN, I CAN'T. 719 00:26:26,285 --> 00:26:28,387 BECAUSE I GOT A DATE WITH * MR. PERFECT! 720 00:26:28,420 --> 00:26:30,189 YES, I GUESS THE NEW PROFILE WORKED. 721 00:26:30,222 --> 00:26:32,391 - YOU SOUND GENUINELY EXCITED ABOUT THIS. 722 00:26:32,424 --> 00:26:34,861 - I AM! 723 00:26:34,894 --> 00:26:36,095 AS A DETECTIVE. 724 00:26:36,128 --> 00:26:39,398 FOR THE BREAK, SHAWN. 725 00:26:39,431 --> 00:26:42,101 BUT, UH, LOOK, I REALLY NEED YOU IN MY EAR 726 00:26:42,134 --> 00:26:45,271 FOR SURVEILLANCE. I CANNOT DO THIS WITHOUT YOU. 727 00:26:45,304 --> 00:26:48,641 SHAWN, I NEED YOU TO FIND A WAY TO BE OKAY WITH THIS. 728 00:26:48,675 --> 00:26:50,042 - DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT I'M GOING THROUGH? 729 00:26:50,076 --> 00:26:51,678 MY GIRLFRIEND HAS A NEW BOYFRIEND, 730 00:26:51,711 --> 00:26:53,045 MY BEST FRIEND HAS A GIRLFRIEND, 731 00:26:53,079 --> 00:26:54,981 MY MOM BOUGHT ME SHORTS. 732 00:26:55,014 --> 00:26:57,016 LOOK, I JUST--I NEED SOMEBODY TO TALK TO HERE. 733 00:26:57,049 --> 00:27:00,419 - SHAWN, I WOULD, AND I'M REALLY, REALLY SORRY, 734 00:27:00,452 --> 00:27:01,854 BUT WE ARE JUST SO BUSY RIGHT NOW. 735 00:27:01,888 --> 00:27:04,757 YEAH, CAN YOU GO BACK? - OKAY. 736 00:27:04,791 --> 00:27:06,058 MA! DAD! 737 00:27:06,092 --> 00:27:09,161 THINK I COULD USE A QUICK CHAT. 738 00:27:09,195 --> 00:27:12,231 MOM. 739 00:27:12,264 --> 00:27:14,233 LOOK, DAD-- 740 00:27:14,266 --> 00:27:17,103 - OH! - OH! 741 00:27:19,739 --> 00:27:22,975 - [slo-mo] NO! 742 00:27:24,210 --> 00:27:27,179 - [slo-mo] GOOSE! 743 00:27:27,213 --> 00:27:28,715 - [screams] 744 00:27:28,748 --> 00:27:31,317 FLY, ERIC. 745 00:27:31,350 --> 00:27:33,052 FLY HIGH. 746 00:27:33,085 --> 00:27:35,387 HIGH INTO THE CLOUDS. 747 00:27:35,421 --> 00:27:36,989 - I WANT YOU TO FEEL LIKE YOU CAN ASK ME ANYTHING. 748 00:27:37,023 --> 00:27:39,291 THERE ARE NO SILLY, STUPID QUESTIONS. 749 00:27:39,325 --> 00:27:41,460 - PLEASE, STOP MAKING SOUNDS WITH YOUR MOUTH. 750 00:27:41,493 --> 00:27:43,830 - IT ALL HAPPENED VERY ORGANICALLY. 751 00:27:43,863 --> 00:27:45,164 I'M STILL TRYING TO PROCESS IT MYSELF. 752 00:27:45,197 --> 00:27:48,968 I THINK MAYBE IT GREW OUT OF OUR HISTORY OR... 753 00:27:49,001 --> 00:27:52,304 MAYBE MY NEW OUTLOOK ON LIFE, POST BEING SHOT. 754 00:27:52,338 --> 00:27:55,074 PLUS... 755 00:27:55,107 --> 00:27:59,011 YOUR MOTHER IS A VERY ATTRACTIVE WOMAN. 756 00:27:59,045 --> 00:28:00,246 AND I'M A MAN. 757 00:28:00,279 --> 00:28:03,215 WITH NEEDS. 758 00:28:03,249 --> 00:28:06,853 - [grunts] DAD? 759 00:28:06,886 --> 00:28:08,187 - YEAH. 760 00:28:08,220 --> 00:28:10,022 - WHEN I WAS A KID... 761 00:28:10,056 --> 00:28:12,024 - THAT'S GOOD, THAT'S GOOD. KEEP GOING. 762 00:28:12,058 --> 00:28:13,325 - I HAD A RECURRING NIGHTMARE 763 00:28:13,359 --> 00:28:17,997 THAT ALIENS CAME DOWN AND ABDUCTED ME. 764 00:28:18,030 --> 00:28:21,133 AND THEY DID EXPERIMENTS ON MY BRAIN. 765 00:28:21,167 --> 00:28:23,870 WHERE ARE THOSE ALIENS NOW? 766 00:28:23,903 --> 00:28:27,006 - SHAWN, LOOK. - PLEASE, TAKE ME AWAY. 767 00:28:27,039 --> 00:28:29,041 - I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ALIENS, 768 00:28:29,075 --> 00:28:33,780 BUT I DO KNOW THAT LOVEMAKING CAN BE A VERY BEAUTIFUL THING 769 00:28:33,813 --> 00:28:37,083 IF IT'S A PRODUCT OF A LOVING RELATIONSHIP. 770 00:28:37,116 --> 00:28:39,986 - HOLY CRAP. 771 00:28:40,019 --> 00:28:43,222 DAD, LOOK AT THIS GUY. 772 00:28:43,255 --> 00:28:45,091 - WHOA, WHOA, SHAWN. 773 00:28:45,124 --> 00:28:47,026 I DON'T THINK I'M READY TO HAVE THIS CONVERSATION. 774 00:28:47,059 --> 00:28:49,428 - NO, NO, DAD, LOOK. IT'S THE SAME GUY. 775 00:28:49,461 --> 00:28:52,498 THIS IS THE SAME MAN. 776 00:28:52,531 --> 00:28:55,401 [computer keys clicking] 777 00:28:55,434 --> 00:28:57,003 THESE PICTURES WERE TAKEN STRAIGHT FROM THE CATALOG 778 00:28:57,036 --> 00:28:58,971 AND THEN PHOTOSHOPPED WITH DIFFERENT BACKGROUNDS. 779 00:28:59,005 --> 00:29:00,773 LIKE THIS ONE, WITH HIM IN THE SKI GEAR. 780 00:29:00,807 --> 00:29:02,141 LOOK, IT'S SHOT IN A STUDIO, RIGHT? 781 00:29:02,174 --> 00:29:03,910 NOW LOOK AT THIS. 782 00:29:03,943 --> 00:29:06,078 ON THE PROFILE, HE'S IN FRONT OF A SKI LIFT, 783 00:29:06,112 --> 00:29:07,780 LIKE HE'S ACTUALLY SKIING. 784 00:29:07,814 --> 00:29:10,282 - SHAWN, HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN OBSESSED WITH THIS MAN? 785 00:29:10,316 --> 00:29:12,084 - DAD, I GOT TO GO. 786 00:29:12,118 --> 00:29:13,485 THIS TALK OF OURS WILL HAVE TO WAIT 787 00:29:13,519 --> 00:29:15,021 UNTIL WELL AFTER WE'RE DEAD. 788 00:29:15,054 --> 00:29:16,789 AND EVEN THEN, THE DEAD VERSION OF ME 789 00:29:16,823 --> 00:29:18,257 IS NOT GONNA HAVE ANY QUESTIONS FOR THE DEAD VERSION OF YOU. 790 00:29:18,290 --> 00:29:19,926 'CAUSE IT WASN'T ORGANIC. 791 00:29:19,959 --> 00:29:22,995 AND YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT LOVEMAKING. 792 00:29:23,029 --> 00:29:24,797 THANKS FOR JOINING THE CASE, BUDDY. 793 00:29:24,831 --> 00:29:26,165 - NOT A PROBLEM. 794 00:29:26,198 --> 00:29:27,967 - AND I'M SORRY I ACCUSED YOUR NEW GIRLFRIEND 795 00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:29,335 OF TRYING TO PULL A BRIDE OF CHUCKY THING. 796 00:29:29,368 --> 00:29:31,170 - IT'S COOL. I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE 797 00:29:31,203 --> 00:29:33,806 TO BE LONELY AND SINGLE. - WELL, I'M NOT SINGLE, GUS. 798 00:29:33,840 --> 00:29:34,941 AND THAT WAS YOU, AS OF YESTERDAY. 799 00:29:34,974 --> 00:29:36,508 - OH, SHAWN, 800 00:29:36,542 --> 00:29:38,077 YOU DON'T SEEM TO BE IN A HEALTHY HEAD SPACE. 801 00:29:38,110 --> 00:29:39,545 - I'M SORRY. 802 00:29:39,578 --> 00:29:40,980 MAYBE IT'S BECAUSE I WALKED IN 803 00:29:41,013 --> 00:29:43,115 ON MY DIVORCED PARENTS HAVING SEX, GUS. 804 00:29:43,149 --> 00:29:44,483 THEN MY DAD SET ME DOWN 805 00:29:44,516 --> 00:29:46,418 AND TOLD ME THAT MY BODY WAS A WONDERLAND. 806 00:29:46,452 --> 00:29:48,054 - SHAWN, ARE YOU SURE YOU SAW WHAT YOU THINK YOU SAW? 807 00:29:48,087 --> 00:29:49,288 - YES, I'M POSITIVE. 808 00:29:49,321 --> 00:29:52,391 I-- [whimpers] 809 00:29:52,424 --> 00:29:54,093 WHAT ABOUT YOU? - WHAT? 810 00:29:54,126 --> 00:29:56,028 - DID YOU EVER WALK IN ON YOUR PARENTS? 811 00:29:56,062 --> 00:29:57,329 - MY PARENTS NEVER HAD SEX, SHAWN. 812 00:29:57,363 --> 00:29:59,298 - OF COURSE, THEY DID. - DIDN'T HAPPEN. 813 00:29:59,331 --> 00:30:01,300 LOOK, YOU'RE LOOKING AT ONE OF GOD'S PERFECT LITTLE MIRACLES 814 00:30:01,333 --> 00:30:02,601 RIGHT NOW. 815 00:30:02,634 --> 00:30:04,136 - OH, YEAH? WELL, WHAT ABOUT JOY? 816 00:30:04,170 --> 00:30:05,838 - I'M STILL NOT SURE SHE ISN'T ADOPTED. 817 00:30:05,872 --> 00:30:07,339 - WHERE IS SHE, BY THE WAY? - I DON'T KNOW. 818 00:30:07,373 --> 00:30:09,008 MAN, WHY ARE WE SITTING IN FRONT OF SOME DUDE'S HOUSE? 819 00:30:09,041 --> 00:30:10,576 BECAUSE HE'S NOT JUST "SOME DUDE," GUS. 820 00:30:10,609 --> 00:30:12,845 HE'S MR. POSSIBILITIES. 821 00:30:12,879 --> 00:30:14,513 MR. POSSIBILITIES ISN'T WHO HE SAYS HE IS. 822 00:30:14,546 --> 00:30:16,082 HIS REAL NAME IS KEN DOWLING. 823 00:30:16,115 --> 00:30:18,184 FABRICATED AN ENTIRE PROFILE 824 00:30:18,217 --> 00:30:20,386 TO TRY AND CREATE THE PERFECT SINGLE MAN 825 00:30:20,419 --> 00:30:21,620 LIVING IN SANTA BARBARA. 826 00:30:21,653 --> 00:30:23,089 - WHY WOULD HE DO THAT? 827 00:30:23,122 --> 00:30:25,992 - BECAUSE HE'S ALREADY MARRIED. 828 00:30:26,025 --> 00:30:27,927 LASSIE CONFIRMED THAT HE HAS A RECORD. 829 00:30:27,960 --> 00:30:30,029 AND HE IS THE ONLY ONE LEFT OF THE ORIGINAL SIX. 830 00:30:30,062 --> 00:30:31,263 - MM-MM. 831 00:30:31,297 --> 00:30:33,332 I WOULD NEVER CHEAT ON RACHEL. 832 00:30:33,365 --> 00:30:35,935 I CAN'T IMAGINE NOT HAVING HER IN MY LIFE RIGHT NOW. 833 00:30:35,968 --> 00:30:39,405 - REALLY? JUST THINK BACK TO YESTERDAY AT ABOUT 6:00 P.M. 834 00:30:39,438 --> 00:30:41,240 COME ON. 835 00:30:41,273 --> 00:30:43,509 WE HAVE A MARRIAGE TO DESTROY. 836 00:30:43,542 --> 00:30:45,177 - MY HUSBAND IS HAVING AN AFFAIR? 837 00:30:45,211 --> 00:30:46,512 - IF ONLY IT WERE THAT SIMPLE, MIRANDA. 838 00:30:46,545 --> 00:30:48,447 - I'M JUST COMING DOWN FOR-- 839 00:30:48,480 --> 00:30:50,883 WHAT'S GOING ON? WHO ARE THESE GUYS? 840 00:30:50,917 --> 00:30:52,184 - SHAWN SPENCER-- PSYCHIC DETECTIVE. 841 00:30:52,218 --> 00:30:54,420 THIS IS MY PARTNER AND IMMACULATE CONCEPTION. 842 00:30:54,453 --> 00:30:55,888 WE ARE BOTH NOT MARRIED. 843 00:30:55,922 --> 00:30:57,423 ALTHOUGH HE HAS A NEW GIRLFRIEND, 844 00:30:57,456 --> 00:30:59,191 AND MY GIRLFRIEND'S CURRENTLY SEEING OTHER PEOPLE, 845 00:30:59,225 --> 00:31:01,527 BUT STRICTLY FOR PROFESSIONAL REASONS--SHE'S A PRO. 846 00:31:01,560 --> 00:31:03,129 - YOU HAVE A PROFILE ON A DATING WEBSITE? 847 00:31:03,162 --> 00:31:04,931 - GO AHEAD, KEN. TELL HER. 848 00:31:04,964 --> 00:31:08,034 YOU USED ONLINE DATING TO RELIVE YOUR SINGLE DAYS. 849 00:31:08,067 --> 00:31:10,302 TELL HER HOW YOU CREATED THIS MR. POSSIBILITIES PROFILE 850 00:31:10,336 --> 00:31:11,637 AND STARTED LIVING A DOUBLE LIFE. 851 00:31:11,670 --> 00:31:13,472 - KEN? 852 00:31:13,505 --> 00:31:15,207 - ONLY THING YOU DIDN'T COUNT ON WERE THOSE TWO POOR BLONDE GIRLS 853 00:31:15,241 --> 00:31:17,309 FIGURING YOU OUT AND THREATENING TO EXPOSE YOU TO YOUR WIFE. 854 00:31:17,343 --> 00:31:19,145 ISN'T THAT RIGHT, GUS? 855 00:31:19,178 --> 00:31:20,913 - I'M REALLY HEARING MOST OF THIS FOR THE FIRST TIME. 856 00:31:20,947 --> 00:31:22,581 - YOU HAD NO CHOICE BUT TO GET RID OF 'EM 857 00:31:22,614 --> 00:31:25,985 THE OLD-FASHIONED WAY. CCCCHHHH! 858 00:31:26,018 --> 00:31:31,023 - [gasping] 859 00:31:31,057 --> 00:31:33,659 - [slo-mo] GOOSE! 860 00:31:33,692 --> 00:31:36,328 - WHO IS GOOSE? - I DON'T KNOW! 861 00:31:36,362 --> 00:31:40,399 I MEAN, I WOULD NEVER USE THOSE PICTURES TO GET DATES. 862 00:31:40,432 --> 00:31:42,268 - HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO US? 863 00:31:42,301 --> 00:31:43,669 - YES, KEN. HOW COULD YOU? 864 00:31:43,702 --> 00:31:46,005 LOOK AT THAT PUG'S FACE. LOOK AT IT! 865 00:31:46,038 --> 00:31:48,040 SHAME ON YOU, SHAME ON YOU. 866 00:31:48,074 --> 00:31:50,042 I CAN SENSE IT-- YOUR INFIDELITY, 867 00:31:50,076 --> 00:31:52,344 YOUR EXTRACURRICULAR ACTIVITIES, 868 00:31:52,378 --> 00:31:55,014 POSSIBLY...OFFICE-RELATED. 869 00:31:55,047 --> 00:31:57,083 I'M NOT SURE. - KEN? 870 00:31:57,116 --> 00:32:00,052 - I WENT OUT WITH MY SECRETARY FOR LUNCH ONCE. ONCE. 871 00:32:00,086 --> 00:32:01,954 - DID YOU ORDER DESSERT? - DID YOU ORDER DESSERT? 872 00:32:01,988 --> 00:32:03,222 - YEAH, MAYBE, I DON'T KNOW! 873 00:32:03,255 --> 00:32:05,257 WHAT--WHAT DOES THIS MATTER? 874 00:32:05,291 --> 00:32:07,126 - I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I'M GONNA DO, KEN. 875 00:32:07,159 --> 00:32:09,628 I'M GONNA CALL A CAR TO COME HERE AND ARREST YOU. 876 00:32:09,661 --> 00:32:11,163 MCNAB! HEY! 877 00:32:11,197 --> 00:32:12,965 I NEED ONE PADDY WAGON, ONE PATTY MELT, 878 00:32:12,999 --> 00:32:16,435 SOME YELLOW CRIME-SCENE TAPE, AND, UH, TWO CINNAMON ROLLS 879 00:32:16,468 --> 00:32:18,504 DELIVERED TO THE FOLLOWING ADDRESS-- 880 00:32:18,537 --> 00:32:20,339 JULES. - SO THIS THING IS OFF? 881 00:32:20,372 --> 00:32:22,574 - I GOT GOOD NEWS AND I GOT BETTER NEWS. 882 00:32:22,608 --> 00:32:24,510 GOOD NEWS IS YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO ON A DATE 883 00:32:24,543 --> 00:32:25,978 WITH MR. PERFECT... [glass shatters] 884 00:32:26,012 --> 00:32:27,579 BECAUSE MR. PERFECT IS MARRIED. 885 00:32:27,613 --> 00:32:29,315 - MARRIED? 886 00:32:29,348 --> 00:32:31,083 - DON'T SOUND SO DISAPPOINTED. THAT WAS THE GOOD NEWS. 887 00:32:31,117 --> 00:32:32,084 - I'M SORRY, O'HARA. 888 00:32:32,118 --> 00:32:33,752 - WHY IS EVERYBODY SO SORRY? 889 00:32:33,785 --> 00:32:36,155 LOOK, I BUSTED THIS GUY BY FIGURING OUT 890 00:32:36,188 --> 00:32:39,325 THAT HE MURDERED THOSE WOMEN WHEN THEY DISCOVERED HIS SCAM. 891 00:32:39,358 --> 00:32:41,227 - DID HE LOOK AS GOOD AS HIS PICTURES? 892 00:32:41,260 --> 00:32:44,263 - HONEY, PLEASE! 893 00:32:44,296 --> 00:32:45,764 - YEAH, I GUESS SO. 894 00:32:45,797 --> 00:32:48,134 HELLO? 895 00:32:48,167 --> 00:32:49,668 - IT'S A TOUGH BREAK, O'HARA, BUT TELL YOU WHAT. 896 00:32:49,701 --> 00:32:51,303 I'LL GO SNATCH THIS GUY UP AND BOOK HIM. 897 00:32:51,337 --> 00:32:53,439 WHY DON'T YOU GO HOME, WATCH A COUPLE EPISODES 898 00:32:53,472 --> 00:32:55,607 OF SEX AND THE CITY AND SHAKE THIS WHOLE THING OFF. 899 00:32:55,641 --> 00:32:59,145 - UH, WHAT IS SHE SHAKING OFF EXACTLY? 900 00:32:59,178 --> 00:33:02,414 HELLO? 901 00:33:02,448 --> 00:33:05,484 [ringtone chimes] 902 00:33:05,517 --> 00:33:07,386 HELLO, MY DEAR. 903 00:33:07,419 --> 00:33:08,754 YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK MIGHT MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER 904 00:33:08,787 --> 00:33:10,322 IS IF YOU GO HOME TONIGHT, 905 00:33:10,356 --> 00:33:12,291 CHANGE INTO YOUR HELENE OUTFIT, 906 00:33:12,324 --> 00:33:14,660 DO A LITTLE DANCE TO POUR SOME SUGAR ON ME. 907 00:33:14,693 --> 00:33:16,328 - IT ISN'T JULES, BUT I'D BE WILLING 908 00:33:16,362 --> 00:33:17,763 TO WEAR WHAT I'M WEARING RIGHT NOW 909 00:33:17,796 --> 00:33:19,131 AND DROP IT LIKE IT'S HOT. - MELLISH? 910 00:33:19,165 --> 00:33:21,067 - I KNOW YOU TOLD ME TO CALL YOU 911 00:33:21,100 --> 00:33:23,235 IF THERE WAS ANY ACTIVITY ON MR. PERFECT'S ACCOUNT. 912 00:33:23,269 --> 00:33:24,770 - WELL, THAT IS NO LONGER NECESSARY, 913 00:33:24,803 --> 00:33:28,040 BECAUSE MR. POSSIBILITIES, AKA MR. PERFECT, 914 00:33:28,074 --> 00:33:30,742 HAS BEEN ARRESTED. HE'S DONE. 915 00:33:30,776 --> 00:33:32,511 - WELL, THEN, I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU EXPLAIN THIS. 916 00:33:32,544 --> 00:33:35,047 MR. POSSIBILITIES JUST SENT AN EMAIL, 917 00:33:35,081 --> 00:33:36,482 TEN MINUTES AGO. 918 00:33:36,515 --> 00:33:38,650 - WELL, UNLESS HE USED HIS TEETH 919 00:33:38,684 --> 00:33:42,354 OR HIT THE LITTLE KEYS WITH HIS NOSE WHILE HANDCUFFED, 920 00:33:42,388 --> 00:33:44,190 THAT'S NOT POSSIBLE. 921 00:33:44,223 --> 00:33:47,793 - UNLESS THE GUY YOU HAVE IN CUFFS IS NOT MR. POSSIBILITIES. 922 00:33:50,329 --> 00:33:53,499 - HMM. 923 00:34:03,242 --> 00:34:05,477 - MIKE? 924 00:34:05,511 --> 00:34:07,313 - HELLO, HELENE. 925 00:34:10,582 --> 00:34:12,751 - YOU WEREN'T EXPECTING TO SEE ME HERE, HELENE? 926 00:34:12,784 --> 00:34:14,820 WERE YOU WAITING ON A DATE OR SOMETHING? 927 00:34:14,853 --> 00:34:17,356 - NO, UH, TO BE HONEST 928 00:34:17,389 --> 00:34:19,858 I SORT OF GAVE UP ON THAT WHOLE DATING THING. 929 00:34:19,891 --> 00:34:21,793 IT'S JUST TOO MUCH DRAMA. 930 00:34:21,827 --> 00:34:23,529 - YEAH, ME TOO, ME TOO. 931 00:34:23,562 --> 00:34:25,831 UH, SO YOU'RE NOT HERE EXPECTING 932 00:34:25,864 --> 00:34:27,766 TO SEE A MR. POSSIBILITIES? 933 00:34:27,799 --> 00:34:29,335 - WHO? NO. 934 00:34:29,368 --> 00:34:31,837 NO, I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO THAT IS. 935 00:34:31,870 --> 00:34:34,640 - HELENE. 936 00:34:34,673 --> 00:34:37,809 [laughs] 937 00:34:37,843 --> 00:34:39,578 [clicks tongue] - WHAT? 938 00:34:39,611 --> 00:34:40,779 WHO IS HE? 939 00:34:40,812 --> 00:34:42,848 - WELL, HE'S NOBODY. 940 00:34:42,881 --> 00:34:44,816 YEAH, HE DOESN'T EXIST. 941 00:34:44,850 --> 00:34:46,785 I'M SORRY, DID YOU THINK-- 942 00:34:46,818 --> 00:34:49,888 YEAH, THE REALLY BAD NEWS, FOR YOU, 943 00:34:49,921 --> 00:34:53,425 IS THAT I CREATED HIM. 944 00:34:53,459 --> 00:34:56,595 TO PROVE A POINT. 945 00:34:57,829 --> 00:35:00,566 - LASSIE, WE GOT TO GO! JULES IS IN TROUBLE! 946 00:35:00,599 --> 00:35:01,867 - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 947 00:35:01,900 --> 00:35:04,303 - I'LL EXPLAIN ON THE WAY. GUS, COME ON! 948 00:35:04,336 --> 00:35:07,339 - SUCH A BEAUTIFUL DAY, ISN'T IT? 949 00:35:07,373 --> 00:35:09,475 LET'S GO LOOK AT SOME DUCKS. 950 00:35:09,508 --> 00:35:12,478 COME ON, NICE AND EASY. 951 00:35:12,511 --> 00:35:14,580 NICE AND EASY. 952 00:35:14,613 --> 00:35:15,914 IT'LL BE JUST LIKE A DATE. 953 00:35:15,947 --> 00:35:17,883 - TO PROVE A POINT TO WHO? 954 00:35:17,916 --> 00:35:19,251 - OH, TO ALL YOU WOMEN. 955 00:35:19,285 --> 00:35:21,920 BECAUSE YOU LIE. WATCH YOUR STEP. 956 00:35:21,953 --> 00:35:23,789 YEAH, YOU SAY YOU WANT THE NICE GUY. 957 00:35:23,822 --> 00:35:27,593 YOU SAY YOU WANT THE GOOD GUY, BUT THEN...HA HA HA! 958 00:35:27,626 --> 00:35:29,161 YOU'RE ALL SO SHALLOW. 959 00:35:29,195 --> 00:35:31,763 AND I JUST PROVED IT. 960 00:35:31,797 --> 00:35:34,633 [sighs] I HATE THIS. 961 00:35:34,666 --> 00:35:36,935 THIS IS JUST-- 962 00:35:36,968 --> 00:35:39,905 THIS IS JUST A TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE THING 963 00:35:39,938 --> 00:35:42,274 YOU'RE MAKING ME DO, HELENE. 964 00:35:42,308 --> 00:35:44,776 - MIKE, NO ONE IS MAKING YOU DO ANYTH-- 965 00:35:44,810 --> 00:35:45,777 - YES, YOU ARE! 966 00:35:45,811 --> 00:35:48,847 [siren wails] 967 00:35:53,819 --> 00:35:55,954 - MIKE. 968 00:35:55,987 --> 00:35:57,956 JULIET'S DATE FROM THE ITALIAN RESTAURANT. 969 00:35:57,989 --> 00:36:01,793 - OH, YEAH, I DATED BOTH OF THOSE GIRLS THAT WERE KILLED. 970 00:36:01,827 --> 00:36:03,329 YEAH, THEY REJECTED ME. 971 00:36:03,362 --> 00:36:05,197 THEY GAVE EXCUSES WHY THEY WEREN'T READY 972 00:36:05,231 --> 00:36:06,632 FOR A RELATIONSHIP, 973 00:36:06,665 --> 00:36:08,300 AND THEN THEY TURNED AROUND 974 00:36:08,334 --> 00:36:10,936 AND THEY WERE TOTALLY INTERESTED IN MY, UH, 975 00:36:10,969 --> 00:36:13,639 [laughs] FICTITIOUS ALTER EGO MR. POSSIBILITIES, 976 00:36:13,672 --> 00:36:16,908 BECAUSE HE'S GOOD-LOOKING, AND HE SEEMS FLAWLESS. 977 00:36:16,942 --> 00:36:21,247 YOU SEE, WOMEN...DON'T WANT WHAT THEY SAY THEY WANT. 978 00:36:21,280 --> 00:36:23,415 AND YOU'RE THE SAME. [gun cocks] 979 00:36:23,449 --> 00:36:25,284 [tires screech] 980 00:36:26,718 --> 00:36:27,886 - ALL RIGHT, THIS WAS THE MEETING SPOT. 981 00:36:27,919 --> 00:36:30,422 - CAN'T BE FAR OFF. LET'S SPLIT UP! 982 00:36:30,456 --> 00:36:31,523 REMEMBER OUR DATE AT THE RESTAURANT? 983 00:36:31,557 --> 00:36:33,325 REMEMBER WHAT YOU TOLD ME? 984 00:36:33,359 --> 00:36:34,860 DO YOU REMEMBER HOW YOU TOLD ME THAT THINGS WERE--WHAT WAS IT? 985 00:36:34,893 --> 00:36:36,228 WHAT WAS IT, HELENE? THEY WERE TOO COMPLICATED? 986 00:36:36,262 --> 00:36:38,697 THEY WERE TOO COMPLICATED FOR YOU? 987 00:36:38,730 --> 00:36:40,866 AND THEN YOU TURN AROUND 988 00:36:40,899 --> 00:36:42,668 AND YOU WRITE TO MR. POSSIBILITY, 989 00:36:42,701 --> 00:36:46,272 AND YOU PRACTICALLY BEG--BEG-- TO GO OUT WITH HIM. 990 00:36:48,674 --> 00:36:51,810 I ALMOST GAVE YOU A PASS, BUT THEN YOU KEPT WRITING. 991 00:36:51,843 --> 00:36:53,645 YOU WERE RELENTLESS. 992 00:36:53,679 --> 00:36:56,548 YOU JUST HAD TO GO OUT WITH HIM! DIDN'T YOU? 993 00:36:56,582 --> 00:36:58,384 - NO, I DIDN'T-- - DON'T TURN AROUND! 994 00:36:58,417 --> 00:36:59,685 - [grunts] 995 00:37:05,657 --> 00:37:08,427 BUT I'M NOT LIKE THOSE OTHER GIRLS. 996 00:37:08,460 --> 00:37:09,561 I DID LIKE YOU. 997 00:37:09,595 --> 00:37:12,030 MAYBE A LITTLE TOO MUCH. 998 00:37:12,063 --> 00:37:13,899 I JUST DIDN'T THINK THAT YOU WERE INTO ME. 999 00:37:13,932 --> 00:37:17,269 I MEAN, YOU ACTUALLY-- YOU MADE ME A LITTLE NERVOUS, 1000 00:37:17,303 --> 00:37:20,606 BECAUSE I JUST DIDN'T THINK THAT SOMEONE LIKE YOU 1001 00:37:20,639 --> 00:37:22,974 WOULD TAKE SOMEONE LIKE ME SERIOUSLY. 1002 00:37:23,008 --> 00:37:24,710 IT'S TRUE. 1003 00:37:24,743 --> 00:37:29,548 I JUST WONDERED, THE WHOLE TIME, 1004 00:37:29,581 --> 00:37:33,419 WHAT YOU LOOKED LIKE WITHOUT THOSE GLASSES. 1005 00:37:35,587 --> 00:37:38,957 MAY I? 1006 00:37:45,364 --> 00:37:46,765 SEE? 1007 00:37:46,798 --> 00:37:49,468 THAT IS SO MUCH BETTER. 1008 00:37:49,501 --> 00:37:50,736 WHEN I LOOK INTO YOUR EYES, 1009 00:37:50,769 --> 00:37:55,040 I SEE HOW DEEPLY YOU FEEL THINGS, 1010 00:37:55,073 --> 00:37:57,909 AND I UNDERSTAND WHY YOU HAD TO DO 1011 00:37:57,943 --> 00:37:59,711 WHAT YOU DID TO THOSE GIRLS. 1012 00:37:59,745 --> 00:38:02,948 - YOU DO? - AND NOW... 1013 00:38:02,981 --> 00:38:06,552 IT CAN JUST BE YOU...AND ME. 1014 00:38:09,755 --> 00:38:12,391 - GAH! AHH! 1015 00:38:12,424 --> 00:38:13,792 [grunting] 1016 00:38:13,825 --> 00:38:16,828 - JULES, I'M COMING! 1017 00:38:18,930 --> 00:38:21,500 OH, COME ON, YOU GUYS! GET A ROOM. 1018 00:38:21,533 --> 00:38:23,635 - REALLY? 1019 00:38:23,669 --> 00:38:25,337 - YOU SEE? 1020 00:38:25,371 --> 00:38:26,972 FAKE DATING ISN'T ALL IT'S CRACKED UP TO BE. 1021 00:38:27,005 --> 00:38:28,840 - HAD ITS MOMENTS. 1022 00:38:28,874 --> 00:38:30,041 - YOU MADE OUT WITH A SERIAL KILLER. 1023 00:38:30,075 --> 00:38:32,678 - YOU MADE OUT WITH LASSITER. 1024 00:38:32,711 --> 00:38:34,045 - OKAY, I GUESS THAT MAKES US EVEN. 1025 00:38:34,079 --> 00:38:38,550 - JULES, I HAD A STARTLING REVELATION THIS WEEK. 1026 00:38:38,584 --> 00:38:41,119 THINK I'M READY TO CO-HABITATE WITH SOMEONE. 1027 00:38:41,152 --> 00:38:42,988 - REALLY? 1028 00:38:43,021 --> 00:38:44,690 SOMEONE? 1029 00:38:44,723 --> 00:38:45,857 - YEAH, I WAS GONNA PUT AN AD IN CRAIGSLIST. 1030 00:38:45,891 --> 00:38:48,093 BUT, I MEAN, IF YOU KNOW SOMEBODY... 1031 00:38:48,126 --> 00:38:50,962 - [laughs] - I'M WIDE OPEN. 1032 00:38:50,996 --> 00:38:55,100 I, UH, LIKE THE WAY WE FIT. 1033 00:38:55,133 --> 00:38:56,968 AND I'M NOT JUST TALKING ABOUT WHEN WE SPOON IT UP 1034 00:38:57,002 --> 00:39:01,873 HALF-MOON STYLE, ALTHOUGH THAT'S TIGHT. 1035 00:39:01,907 --> 00:39:05,677 I THINK IT'S TIME THAT WE MOVED IN TOGETHER. 1036 00:39:08,614 --> 00:39:09,881 - THAT DOESN'T SCARE YOU? 1037 00:39:09,915 --> 00:39:11,983 - THOUGHT ABOUT IT, BELIEVE ME. 1038 00:39:12,017 --> 00:39:14,586 I JUST REALIZED THAT I HAVEN'T LIVED IN THE SAME APARTMENT 1039 00:39:14,620 --> 00:39:17,723 FOR MORE THAN THREE MONTHS SINCE I MET YOU. 1040 00:39:17,756 --> 00:39:20,926 AND...HOME... 1041 00:39:20,959 --> 00:39:24,630 SHOULD BE WHEREVER YOU ARE. 1042 00:39:24,663 --> 00:39:26,765 AND THE DOGS THAT WE'RE GONNA GET, 1043 00:39:26,798 --> 00:39:27,866 RELATIVELY SOON. 1044 00:39:27,899 --> 00:39:30,736 SO WHEREVER YOU... 1045 00:39:30,769 --> 00:39:33,939 AND THE FLEET OF PUGS ARE... 1046 00:39:33,972 --> 00:39:36,408 THAT'S WHERE I WANT TO BE. 1047 00:39:36,442 --> 00:39:39,110 - I FEEL THE EXACT SAME WAY. 1048 00:39:39,144 --> 00:39:41,413 ABOUT PUGS. - GOOD, GOOD. 1049 00:39:41,447 --> 00:39:42,781 BECAUSE YOU CAN FIT THEIR LITTLE FACES 1050 00:39:42,814 --> 00:39:43,882 RIGHT IN YOUR MOUTH. 1051 00:39:43,915 --> 00:39:45,484 - THEY JUST SQUISH RIGHT IN THERE. 1052 00:39:45,517 --> 00:39:47,619 - JUST EAT THEIR LITTLE FACES RIGHT OFF. 1053 00:39:47,653 --> 00:39:49,187 - SO WHAT MADE YOU SO SURE? 1054 00:39:49,220 --> 00:39:51,890 - I LEARNED A LOT THIS WEEK, MOVING BACK IN WITH MY DAD. 1055 00:39:51,923 --> 00:39:55,827 I-I LEARNED YOU CAN'T GO BACK TO YOUR CHILDHOOD HOME. 1056 00:39:55,861 --> 00:39:58,597 - NO, THAT'S JUST A PLACE THAT LIVES IN YOUR HEAD. 1057 00:39:58,630 --> 00:40:00,766 - NO, I MEAN, LITERALLY, I CAN'T GO BACK TO THAT HOUSE, EVER, 1058 00:40:00,799 --> 00:40:03,068 EVER AGAIN, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. 1059 00:40:03,101 --> 00:40:05,203 EVER. I SAW MY PARENTS DOING IT. 1060 00:40:05,236 --> 00:40:07,806 - [gasps] WHAT? 1061 00:40:07,839 --> 00:40:09,475 - YEAH. - YOU'RE KIDDING. 1062 00:40:09,508 --> 00:40:11,743 - IT WAS HORRIFYING. IT WAS JUST A SERIES OF LIMBS. 1063 00:40:11,777 --> 00:40:13,044 LIKE, MORE LIMBS THAN MADE SENSE. 1064 00:40:13,078 --> 00:40:15,947 AND OLD PERSONS' SKIN AND PRIMAL NOISES. 1065 00:40:15,981 --> 00:40:17,549 - NOISES? - NOISES LIKE AN AARDVARK. 1066 00:40:17,583 --> 00:40:19,017 I AM SO SORRY. 1067 00:40:19,050 --> 00:40:20,719 - YOU WANT TO KNOW SOMETHING ELSE CRAZY? 1068 00:40:20,752 --> 00:40:22,053 - YES. 1069 00:40:22,087 --> 00:40:26,992 - I'M GOING TO KISS YOU ON THE MOUTH NOW. 1070 00:40:27,025 --> 00:40:30,195 LIVE WITH ME. 1071 00:40:30,228 --> 00:40:32,831 - OKAY. 1072 00:40:36,101 --> 00:40:37,903 [computer keys clicking] - BOOM. 1073 00:40:37,936 --> 00:40:39,771 GOOD-BYE, SINGLE GUS. 1074 00:40:39,805 --> 00:40:40,906 - I KNOW I MAY HAVE FELT A LITTLE THREATENED 1075 00:40:40,939 --> 00:40:42,641 BY YOU AND RACHEL, AT THE BEGINNING. 1076 00:40:42,674 --> 00:40:45,477 BUT I... I AM VERY HAPPY FOR YOU. 1077 00:40:45,511 --> 00:40:47,078 - THANK YOU. I APPRECIATE THAT. 1078 00:40:47,112 --> 00:40:48,580 - I ONLY HALF-MEAN IT. 1079 00:40:48,614 --> 00:40:50,048 I STILL FEEL A LITTLE THREATENED. 1080 00:40:50,081 --> 00:40:51,249 - I KNOW, BUT MY RELATIONSHIP ISN'T QUITE WHERE 1081 00:40:51,282 --> 00:40:52,918 YOU AND JULIET'S ARE YET. 1082 00:40:52,951 --> 00:40:54,886 BUT WE'RE GETTING THERE. - EASY, TIGER. 1083 00:40:54,920 --> 00:40:57,856 BABY STEPS, RIGHT? THESE THINGS ARE DELICATE. 1084 00:40:57,889 --> 00:41:00,091 TAKE IT SLOWLY. GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER. 1085 00:41:00,125 --> 00:41:02,093 - MM-HMM. - MAYBE BREAK UP. 1086 00:41:02,127 --> 00:41:03,194 [knock on door] 1087 00:41:03,228 --> 00:41:06,798 - HEY! LOOK WHO'S HERE. 1088 00:41:06,832 --> 00:41:07,999 - I'M NOT INTERRUPTING ANYTHING, AM I? 1089 00:41:08,033 --> 00:41:09,968 - NOT AT ALL, NOT AT ALL. 1090 00:41:10,001 --> 00:41:12,538 - WE WERE SORT OF-- both: MMM. 1091 00:41:12,571 --> 00:41:13,672 - THAT'S FINE. 1092 00:41:13,705 --> 00:41:15,507 - HELLO, BOO. 1093 00:41:15,541 --> 00:41:18,844 - MMM, THAT'S THE SWEET KIND OF KISSES I WAS LOOKING FOR. 1094 00:41:18,877 --> 00:41:20,579 - "HELLO, BOO." 1095 00:41:20,612 --> 00:41:21,980 - YOU DON'T GET TO USE BOO, SHAWN. 1096 00:41:22,013 --> 00:41:24,683 - OH, IS THAT RIGHT? 1097 00:41:24,716 --> 00:41:27,018 WELL, LOOK, RACHEL, I JUST WANTED TO SAY THAT 1098 00:41:27,052 --> 00:41:27,886 I'M NOT GONNA BE ACCUSING YOU OF MURDER AGAIN 1099 00:41:27,919 --> 00:41:29,721 ANY TIME SOON. 1100 00:41:29,755 --> 00:41:31,122 AND I WAS WRONG ABOUT YOU, AND I'M SORRY. 1101 00:41:31,156 --> 00:41:33,091 AND IT'S CLEAR THAT NOT EVERYONE ON THE INTERNET 1102 00:41:33,124 --> 00:41:34,993 IS A LIAR AND A... 1103 00:41:35,026 --> 00:41:36,562 THIEF AND A HARLOT. 1104 00:41:36,595 --> 00:41:39,665 - THANKS, AND I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I RECOGNIZE 1105 00:41:39,698 --> 00:41:41,099 YOU AND GUS POOPED TOGETHER. 1106 00:41:41,132 --> 00:41:43,969 YOU'RE A GOOD FRIEND, AND I'D NEVER INTERFERE 1107 00:41:44,002 --> 00:41:47,305 WITH THAT FRIENDSHIP. 1108 00:41:47,338 --> 00:41:50,041 - I'M GONNA GO GET SOME SNACKS. WHO'D LIKE SNACKS? 1109 00:41:50,075 --> 00:41:51,743 - I'D LOVE AN APPLE, THANKS. 1110 00:41:51,777 --> 00:41:53,044 - I SAID SNACKS. 1111 00:41:53,078 --> 00:41:55,747 WHICH...MEANS AN APPLE. 1112 00:41:58,049 --> 00:42:01,052 - [chuckles] - YOU KNOW... 1113 00:42:01,086 --> 00:42:02,788 THIS IS WEIRD. 1114 00:42:02,821 --> 00:42:04,590 I KNOW IT'S A BRAND-NEW RELATIONSHIP, 1115 00:42:04,623 --> 00:42:05,891 BUT I FEEL SO CLOSE TO YOU. 1116 00:42:05,924 --> 00:42:07,959 - IT'S NOT WEIRD. I FEEL THE SAME. 1117 00:42:07,993 --> 00:42:09,928 - I FEEL COMFORTABLE, LIKE I CAN TELL YOU ANYTHING 1118 00:42:09,961 --> 00:42:11,997 THAT I WOULDN'T HAVE THE COURAGE TO SAY TO OTHER GUYS, 1119 00:42:12,030 --> 00:42:13,799 AND CERTAINLY NOT SO SOON. 1120 00:42:13,832 --> 00:42:16,334 - BOO, YOU CAN TELL ME ANYTHING YOU WANT. 1121 00:42:16,367 --> 00:42:19,170 I'M READY FOR IT ALL. 1122 00:42:19,204 --> 00:42:21,940 - OOH! HEY, MAX. 1123 00:42:21,973 --> 00:42:23,742 GUS, THIS IS MY SON MAXIMUS. 1124 00:42:23,775 --> 00:42:25,711 MAXIMUS, AS I'VE TOLD YOU SO MANY TIMES, 1125 00:42:25,744 --> 00:42:27,245 NOT TO DO IT INDOORS ON THE FLOOR. 1126 00:42:27,278 --> 00:42:29,981 - ALL RIGHT, I FOUND SOME GREEN APPLE JOLLY RANCHERS, 1127 00:42:30,015 --> 00:42:31,650 BUT THAT'S THE BEST THAT I CAN DO. 1128 00:42:31,683 --> 00:42:33,084 HOLY CRAP! WHO'S THAT?