1
00:00:18,360 --> 00:00:19,800
Why aren't there any eggs on my fork?

2
00:00:21,480 --> 00:00:22,920
Grow up. You got two hands,

3
00:00:22,960 --> 00:00:24,280
make your own breakfast.

4
00:00:24,440 --> 00:00:25,760
Why are you so cranky?

5
00:00:26,120 --> 00:00:27,760
Because nobody made my breakfast.

6
00:00:29,400 --> 00:00:30,600
But, it's Saturday.

7
00:00:31,120 --> 00:00:32,600
Daddy always makes my eggs.

8
00:00:33,040 --> 00:00:34,240
I hope he's not sick.

9
00:00:35,920 --> 00:00:37,760
Hey, Daddy, are-are you feeling okay?

10
00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:38,840
I'm fine.

11
00:00:39,400 --> 00:00:41,520
Well, then get to cooking, good-looking.

12
00:00:41,560 --> 00:00:43,480
My eggs ain't gonna scramble themselves.

13
00:00:44,800 --> 00:00:45,680
No, they're not.

14
00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:47,520
Now, if you'll excuse me,

15
00:00:47,520 --> 00:00:49,000
I got some jogging to do.

16
00:00:51,960 --> 00:00:53,840
I'd hate to be your scratching post,

17
00:00:53,880 --> 00:00:55,640
Mr. Sour Puss N' Boots.

18
00:00:57,440 --> 00:00:58,320
What's the matter?

19
00:00:58,400 --> 00:01:00,080
Your blow-dryer's on the fritz?

20
00:01:00,800 --> 00:01:02,200
Oh, no. I know what it is, Daddy.

21
00:01:02,360 --> 00:01:04,840
You had a dream
that I was the only child and

22
00:01:05,120 --> 00:01:06,560
you woke up to that.

23
00:01:08,240 --> 00:01:10,600
No, sadly, I woke up to both of you.

24
00:01:13,080 --> 00:01:15,960
Wow. He really is upset.

25
00:01:16,960 --> 00:01:18,800
What did you do? Me?

26
00:01:18,920 --> 00:01:20,760
Yes, you! Stop that!

27
00:02:19,240 --> 00:02:21,280
Hey, where are my eggs?

28
00:02:21,640 --> 00:02:22,880
Oh, right.

29
00:02:31,400 --> 00:02:32,440
Enjoy.

30
00:02:34,440 --> 00:02:36,440
Oh, Miles, that's what I love about you.

31
00:02:36,680 --> 00:02:37,920
You're not just pretty.

32
00:02:38,320 --> 00:02:39,720
You're pretty and funny.

33
00:02:41,640 --> 00:02:42,840
Thanks, Jackson.

34
00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:43,960
You know,

35
00:02:44,720 --> 00:02:46,440
maybe I will make you some eggs.

36
00:02:46,680 --> 00:02:47,760
Oh wait,

37
00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:49,440
that would make me pretty,

38
00:02:49,680 --> 00:02:51,440
funny and stupid.

39
00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:55,160
Well, you left out selfish,

40
00:02:56,600 --> 00:02:57,600
which now that I think about it,

41
00:02:57,640 --> 00:02:59,280
is probably why Dad's in such a bad mood.

42
00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:00,760
What are you talking about?

43
00:03:00,880 --> 00:03:02,880
I'm talking about the way
you acted last night

44
00:03:02,920 --> 00:03:05,440
before you went to your stupid party.
Remember?

45
00:03:09,920 --> 00:03:11,720
You are gorgeous.

46
00:03:12,880 --> 00:03:14,880
The only problem with being me

47
00:03:14,960 --> 00:03:17,840
is that everybody else gets
to look at me all the time,

48
00:03:18,720 --> 00:03:20,240
and I only get glimpses.

49
00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:24,440
Excuse me, sister dear.

50
00:03:24,440 --> 00:03:25,160
What?

51
00:03:26,720 --> 00:03:29,160
Could I just use a small corner
of the mirror?

52
00:03:30,080 --> 00:03:31,120
I-I'd like to try to look good,

53
00:03:31,120 --> 00:03:32,600
so that way I don't offend you.

54
00:03:33,080 --> 00:03:35,160
Try putting a paper bag over your head,

55
00:03:35,280 --> 00:03:36,120
Ug-face.

56
00:03:38,080 --> 00:03:39,280
Did you miss me?

57
00:03:39,440 --> 00:03:40,440
I missed you. Yes,

58
00:03:40,440 --> 00:03:42,320
I did. You're so pretty.

59
00:03:44,960 --> 00:03:46,000
Miley Stewart,

60
00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:49,600
if you'd stop worshipping your reflection
you might just realize

61
00:03:49,640 --> 00:03:51,600
that other people live
in this house besides you

62
00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:52,320
and that big,

63
00:03:52,360 --> 00:03:53,560
fat head of yours.

64
00:03:54,080 --> 00:03:55,560
You mean big, fat,

65
00:03:55,760 --> 00:03:57,640
gorgeous head.

66
00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:01,200
Okay, so, um,

67
00:04:01,320 --> 00:04:05,760
which one of you bozos
are driving this teen pop sensation

68
00:04:05,760 --> 00:04:07,680
to another glamorous Hollywood party that

69
00:04:07,680 --> 00:04:09,680
I'm too shallow
to realize is totally pointless?

70
00:04:11,480 --> 00:04:12,840
So you're really going out?

71
00:04:13,160 --> 00:04:13,720
Tonight?

72
00:04:14,240 --> 00:04:15,000
No,

73
00:04:15,520 --> 00:04:18,640
I put this outfit on
to stare at you eating that cupcake.

74
00:04:19,120 --> 00:04:20,440
Hello,

75
00:04:20,640 --> 00:04:23,320
somebody turn the lights on in there.

76
00:04:24,520 --> 00:04:25,200
Father,

77
00:04:25,840 --> 00:04:27,800
even though it will make me late
for my date,

78
00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:29,320
I'll be happy to drive her.

79
00:04:29,640 --> 00:04:30,880
You do so much,

80
00:04:32,120 --> 00:04:36,360
it would be a privilege
to ease your burden in any way that I can.

81
00:04:39,960 --> 00:04:44,080
Jackson,
you are an angel sent from heaven above.

82
00:04:47,640 --> 00:04:50,560
Please, let me share my cupcake with you.

83
00:04:51,200 --> 00:04:53,520
Oh, perhaps just a nibble. Mm.

84
00:04:57,400 --> 00:05:00,320
If you two "ladies" are done
with your little wimp-fest,

85
00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:02,480
people are waiting to drool over me.

86
00:05:02,480 --> 00:05:04,320
Come on. Let's go, chop-chop.

87
00:05:06,400 --> 00:05:07,440
Unbelievable!

88
00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:08,480
I know, Dad.

89
00:05:09,160 --> 00:05:09,960
I know.

90
00:05:15,040 --> 00:05:18,480
Okay, that is so not what happened.

91
00:05:18,600 --> 00:05:20,680
You are the one who acted
like a jerk before

92
00:05:20,720 --> 00:05:22,720
you went on your stupid date last night.

93
00:05:22,760 --> 00:05:24,120
What are you talking about?

94
00:05:24,320 --> 00:05:27,040
I'm talking about
the way it really happened.

95
00:05:27,240 --> 00:05:28,040
Remember?

96
00:05:31,320 --> 00:05:34,920
Why did I ever agree
to attend this frivolous affair?

97
00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:37,640
I mean after all, Father,

98
00:05:37,960 --> 00:05:40,360
the most valuable thing we have is time.

99
00:05:40,880 --> 00:05:45,120
Perhaps I should spend mine bettering
myself through study.

100
00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:50,240
So young, so wise.

101
00:05:50,440 --> 00:05:51,960
You are my favorite child.

102
00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:55,600
Out of the way, fish face.

103
00:05:56,600 --> 00:05:58,880
Whoa, is that Brad Pitt?

104
00:05:59,200 --> 00:06:02,000
No, wait, it's me: Stewart.

105
00:06:02,240 --> 00:06:03,480
Jackson Stewart.

106
00:06:03,560 --> 00:06:07,000
Double-Oh-My: License to thrill.

107
00:06:08,840 --> 00:06:11,360
So, you're really going out? Tonight?

108
00:06:11,880 --> 00:06:13,120
No,

109
00:06:13,480 --> 00:06:17,120
I got all handsomed up to watch TV
with you until you doze off

110
00:06:17,160 --> 00:06:19,720
and drown out the Hee Haw reruns
with your nose whistle.

111
00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:24,120
Oh, Jackson.

112
00:06:24,520 --> 00:06:27,120
Please don't make fun
of our father like that,

113
00:06:27,320 --> 00:06:29,760
for someday he will be gone

114
00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:31,720
and we will miss him terribly.

115
00:06:32,320 --> 00:06:33,960
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

116
00:06:36,480 --> 00:06:37,800
Don't worry, Father.

117
00:06:37,960 --> 00:06:40,920
I'll always love you enough
for the both us.

118
00:06:42,840 --> 00:06:45,640
Miley, you are an angel sent
from heaven above.

119
00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:53,040
Unlike your brother who comes
from the opposite direction.

120
00:06:54,280 --> 00:06:54,760
Now, son,

121
00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:57,800
- I want you to take your sister
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!

122
00:06:58,240 --> 00:06:59,800
I'm sick of driving her everywhere.

123
00:07:00,160 --> 00:07:01,000
You do it.

124
00:07:01,560 --> 00:07:04,120
It'll fill that empty void you
call your life.

125
00:07:06,080 --> 00:07:09,040
Please, drive me just this once?

126
00:07:09,240 --> 00:07:10,600
You don't even have to stop.

127
00:07:10,800 --> 00:07:12,760
Just slow down, and I'll tuck and roll.

128
00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:14,760
Fine!

129
00:07:24,280 --> 00:07:25,240
Unbelievable!

130
00:07:25,720 --> 00:07:28,120
I know, Daddy. I know.

131
00:07:28,880 --> 00:07:31,880
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.

132
00:07:32,880 --> 00:07:36,480
And that is obviously
why Dad is in such a bad mood.

133
00:07:37,080 --> 00:07:38,040
Wow.

134
00:07:38,280 --> 00:07:40,400
"Miley World" sounds fun!

135
00:07:40,520 --> 00:07:43,560
How do you get to school, on a unicorn?

136
00:07:45,600 --> 00:07:46,480
Fine.

137
00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:48,560
We'll just wait for Dad
to get back from his jog,

138
00:07:48,560 --> 00:07:49,640
and we'll ask him.

139
00:07:49,720 --> 00:07:50,840
Yeah, we will.

140
00:07:51,280 --> 00:07:54,240
And then we'll find out that I'm
the one that has the perfect memory.

141
00:07:54,400 --> 00:07:55,720
Oh, really?

142
00:07:56,440 --> 00:07:58,400
Do you remember
when you put in that waffle?

143
00:07:58,960 --> 00:07:59,840
D'oh!

144
00:08:08,160 --> 00:08:10,560
I paid for half of those.

145
00:08:11,640 --> 00:08:14,200
See, this is why you don't get dates:

146
00:08:14,800 --> 00:08:16,560
I'm a girl, be nice.

147
00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:19,840
And this is why you don't get dates:

148
00:08:19,960 --> 00:08:21,480
You eat like a pig.

149
00:08:22,680 --> 00:08:24,080
- You take that back!
- Hmm.

150
00:08:28,400 --> 00:08:30,200
- And you take this back.
- Ew!

151
00:08:31,280 --> 00:08:32,200
Fine.

152
00:08:32,280 --> 00:08:32,760
Look,

153
00:08:33,240 --> 00:08:34,040
your half,

154
00:08:34,480 --> 00:08:34,960
my half.

155
00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:35,960
Fine. Fine.

156
00:08:38,320 --> 00:08:39,880
Oh, hey, Mr. Stewart. What's up?

157
00:08:40,720 --> 00:08:41,880
Never have kids.

158
00:08:42,720 --> 00:08:44,200
They'll only break your heart.

159
00:08:47,320 --> 00:08:48,880
Now I know why he doesn't get dates.

160
00:08:50,240 --> 00:08:51,680
Yeah, my mom went there once.

161
00:08:52,480 --> 00:08:53,520
Never going back.

162
00:08:56,080 --> 00:08:57,040
Wait! Don't eat that chip!

163
00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:58,760
Why? It was on my side.

164
00:08:58,800 --> 00:08:59,520
No-no-no, look!

165
00:08:59,640 --> 00:09:02,320
It's a barbecue flavored Darth Vader!

166
00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:08,000
This is incredible.

167
00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:12,160
Dudes! Dudes!

168
00:09:12,480 --> 00:09:16,880
This is cooler than when my alphabet soup
spelled "yixagriple-dink."

169
00:09:18,920 --> 00:09:20,200
I'll give you five bucks for it.

170
00:09:20,240 --> 00:09:20,960
I'll give you six.

171
00:09:20,960 --> 00:09:21,880
Seven.

172
00:09:22,280 --> 00:09:23,520
Cha-ching.

173
00:09:29,480 --> 00:09:30,360
Okay,

174
00:09:31,040 --> 00:09:32,800
Dad is coming back from his jog.

175
00:09:32,800 --> 00:09:34,440
Get ready to eat your words! That's right,

176
00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:37,440
buddy boy in five seconds,
Dad is going to tell you...

177
00:09:41,360 --> 00:09:44,000
Me. And you can take that to the bank.

178
00:09:46,880 --> 00:09:48,120
Go ahead, apologize.

179
00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:48,720
Me?

180
00:09:48,800 --> 00:09:49,920
You apologize.

181
00:09:50,080 --> 00:09:50,880
Fine.

182
00:09:54,520 --> 00:09:55,160
Daddy,

183
00:09:55,800 --> 00:09:56,800
I'm sorry...

184
00:09:59,040 --> 00:10:01,680
that Jackson was such a jerk
about driving me last night!

185
00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:07,240
And I'm sorry that your daughter
is a mirror hogging,

186
00:10:07,280 --> 00:10:08,400
ride mooching,

187
00:10:08,480 --> 00:10:11,920
bottomless pit of "me-me-me-me-me-me-me--"

188
00:10:12,880 --> 00:10:14,760
"Me-me-me-me-me-me-me."

189
00:10:15,680 --> 00:10:17,640
This isn't about mirrors or rides.

190
00:10:18,080 --> 00:10:18,760
You know what,

191
00:10:19,160 --> 00:10:21,160
I shouldn't have to explain it
to either one of you.

192
00:10:21,400 --> 00:10:22,840
Figure it out for yourselves.

193
00:10:25,160 --> 00:10:26,880
Then what really did happen last night?

194
00:10:30,800 --> 00:10:31,680
Hold on!

195
00:10:34,720 --> 00:10:36,760
If it wasn't how you acted...

196
00:10:38,720 --> 00:10:40,480
And it's not how you acted...

197
00:10:42,200 --> 00:10:43,840
And he ain't gonna tell us anything.

198
00:10:44,560 --> 00:10:45,920
Well, then what was it?

199
00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:48,880
The mail!

200
00:10:50,960 --> 00:10:52,280
I bet it was your report card.

201
00:10:52,640 --> 00:10:53,880
I bet it was your phone bill.

202
00:10:53,880 --> 00:10:54,960
It was not my...

203
00:10:56,480 --> 00:10:57,320
Well, it's possible.

204
00:10:59,560 --> 00:11:01,400
It's just nothing
but a bunch of birthday cards.

205
00:11:01,400 --> 00:11:02,160
For Dad.

206
00:11:02,280 --> 00:11:03,160
On his fortieth.

207
00:11:07,560 --> 00:11:08,640
Which was yesterday.

208
00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:12,440
I can't believe you forgot! Me?

209
00:11:12,480 --> 00:11:13,360
Yes, you!

210
00:11:13,400 --> 00:11:14,120
Stop that!

211
00:11:18,920 --> 00:11:21,520
Okay, so we forgot his birthday.

212
00:11:21,560 --> 00:11:23,160
We're probably not the only ones.

213
00:11:23,320 --> 00:11:26,720
Mamaw, Uncle Earl and Aunt Pearl,

214
00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:29,120
Roxy, Aunt Dolly,

215
00:11:29,640 --> 00:11:34,480
even Bucky's Barbecue sent him a coupon
for a free mud pie.

216
00:11:35,840 --> 00:11:37,240
He's forty now, he doesn't need that.

217
00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:40,520
Jackson, this is serious.

218
00:11:41,800 --> 00:11:45,400
We forgot one of the biggest birthdays
of his life.

219
00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:48,080
Now all we can do is apologize.

220
00:11:48,600 --> 00:11:50,080
Nothing we can do?

221
00:11:50,680 --> 00:11:53,440
Miley, Miley, Miley.
Have I taught you nothing?

222
00:11:54,760 --> 00:11:57,720
Now close your eyes, find your center,

223
00:11:57,880 --> 00:11:59,760
and try to put yourself into my brain.

224
00:12:02,960 --> 00:12:04,600
Ew!  Oh!

225
00:12:11,640 --> 00:12:12,760
Now you see what I see.

226
00:12:12,760 --> 00:12:13,800
This is perfect.

227
00:12:14,080 --> 00:12:15,600
We plan a surprise party

228
00:12:15,640 --> 00:12:17,800
and make Dad think we never forgot.

229
00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:19,600
Wow,

230
00:12:19,880 --> 00:12:22,000
that's way better
than my idea of stealing his coin jar

231
00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:23,240
and running away to Mexico.

232
00:12:29,680 --> 00:12:31,400
Miley, you need to get down here,

233
00:12:31,400 --> 00:12:33,560
or you're gonna be late
for the big CD signing.

234
00:12:35,080 --> 00:12:35,520
You know,

235
00:12:35,560 --> 00:12:37,760
maybe forty minutes late.

236
00:12:39,720 --> 00:12:41,200
The big four-oh.

237
00:12:42,680 --> 00:12:43,480
Nothing.

238
00:12:50,240 --> 00:12:52,200
Hey. I got the decorations.

239
00:12:52,200 --> 00:12:53,600
Great. The cake will be here in an hour.

240
00:12:53,680 --> 00:12:54,680
Let me see.

241
00:12:58,640 --> 00:13:01,080
HAPPY 5th BIRTHDAY

242
00:13:01,800 --> 00:13:03,520
Well they were
all out of "Happy Fortieth's,"

243
00:13:03,560 --> 00:13:05,360
so I got four "five's" and two "ten's."

244
00:13:06,720 --> 00:13:07,280
Hey,

245
00:13:07,320 --> 00:13:08,480
adding is good for old people.

246
00:13:08,520 --> 00:13:10,080
It keeps the mind agile.

247
00:13:12,160 --> 00:13:14,480
Coming!  Oh,

248
00:13:14,480 --> 00:13:15,520
here's Dad's PDA.

249
00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:17,840
Try to get as many of his friends
to come as you can.

250
00:13:18,080 --> 00:13:19,320
Leave it all to me.

251
00:13:21,680 --> 00:13:23,920
Sadly, I have no choice.

252
00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:28,040
Hey, Mr. Adams. It's Jackson.

253
00:13:28,320 --> 00:13:30,200
We're throwing a surprise party for Dad.

254
00:13:31,080 --> 00:13:31,560
Tonight.

255
00:13:33,760 --> 00:13:34,640
No,

256
00:13:35,400 --> 00:13:36,800
we didn't forget.

257
00:13:38,880 --> 00:13:39,560
Tonight.

258
00:13:40,800 --> 00:13:43,040
No, we didn't forget.

259
00:13:45,080 --> 00:13:47,640
Okay, so we forgot!

260
00:13:48,600 --> 00:13:50,280
Your Christmas lights are still up.

261
00:13:50,720 --> 00:13:51,760
Who are you to judge?

262
00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:54,280
So, are you coming?

263
00:13:55,200 --> 00:13:57,640
Hello? Hello?

264
00:13:59,400 --> 00:14:01,560
Look, I don't care if your wife
is in labor.

265
00:14:01,640 --> 00:14:05,640
Just tell her to pop that sucker out
and get over here! Hello?

266
00:14:11,320 --> 00:14:12,440
I got fifty, fifty,

267
00:14:12,440 --> 00:14:14,040
who'll take Darth home for sixty?

268
00:14:15,560 --> 00:14:17,120
Sixty dollars for this one of a kind,

269
00:14:17,160 --> 00:14:18,280
deep-fried, sci-fi icon.

270
00:14:18,280 --> 00:14:20,000
Who'll give us seventy? Seventy?

271
00:14:20,120 --> 00:14:21,200
I'll give you a hundred.

272
00:14:26,560 --> 00:14:27,280
Whoa,

273
00:14:27,960 --> 00:14:29,680
I think the chip's alive.

274
00:14:45,240 --> 00:14:47,960
I was on my way to scuba lessons when

275
00:14:47,960 --> 00:14:50,480
I heard the sound of money being made
without me.

276
00:14:50,880 --> 00:14:53,200
Un-a-cceptable.

277
00:14:55,080 --> 00:14:56,360
Yo. Back off,

278
00:14:56,400 --> 00:14:58,480
Rico. Okay?
This has nothing to do with you.

279
00:14:59,080 --> 00:15:00,240
Where'd you get the chip?

280
00:15:00,560 --> 00:15:01,840
In a bag we bought from the shack.

281
00:15:01,880 --> 00:15:02,320
Yeah.

282
00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:03,960
Do you have the receipt?

283
00:15:04,560 --> 00:15:06,120
I keep every receipt.

284
00:15:06,160 --> 00:15:08,320
My dad's an accountant.

285
00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:09,840
An accountant.

286
00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:12,560
Well the "accountant"

287
00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:17,040
probably should have taught you
how to read the fine print.

288
00:15:18,800 --> 00:15:19,640
Read it and weep.

289
00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:29,920
All food items resembling real
or fictional characters

290
00:15:29,960 --> 00:15:33,360
and/or historical landmarks are
the exclusive property of Rico Industries,

291
00:15:33,360 --> 00:15:35,600
a subsidiary of Mwah Ha Ha International.

292
00:15:39,960 --> 00:15:40,880
Hand it over.

293
00:15:41,280 --> 00:15:42,520
Or, we could run.

294
00:15:42,560 --> 00:15:43,520
Yeah, I like that idea.

295
00:15:47,560 --> 00:15:48,240
Okay. There you go.

296
00:15:48,440 --> 00:15:49,880
Sorry the line was so long.

297
00:15:50,720 --> 00:15:53,080
Hey. Huh.

298
00:15:53,600 --> 00:15:57,080
"Lose Forty Pounds in Forty Days."

299
00:15:57,480 --> 00:15:59,440
And it's forty percent off.

300
00:16:00,720 --> 00:16:02,760
You think I should buy it for somebody?

301
00:16:03,160 --> 00:16:05,000
You know, as a present?

302
00:16:07,320 --> 00:16:08,080
Nothing.

303
00:16:08,920 --> 00:16:09,920
There you go.

304
00:16:11,400 --> 00:16:12,280
Hey!

305
00:16:12,360 --> 00:16:13,920
I just got to make a quick phone call.

306
00:16:17,640 --> 00:16:18,520
Hey, Jackson.

307
00:16:18,640 --> 00:16:19,440
How're we doing?

308
00:16:19,480 --> 00:16:20,280
I need more time.

309
00:16:20,320 --> 00:16:21,040
Stall him.

310
00:16:21,240 --> 00:16:23,280
- How am I going to
- Just do it!

311
00:16:23,520 --> 00:16:24,000
But--

312
00:16:24,080 --> 00:16:25,200
I said do it, diva!

313
00:16:30,080 --> 00:16:33,360
Hi. What's your name, sweetie?

314
00:16:33,440 --> 00:16:34,040
Ed.

315
00:16:34,520 --> 00:16:35,320
Really?

316
00:16:35,800 --> 00:16:37,040
What a great name.

317
00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:38,560
How do you spell that?

318
00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:40,240
E-D.

319
00:16:40,960 --> 00:16:41,960
Interesting.

320
00:16:42,480 --> 00:16:45,160
Is that short for something like Edward,

321
00:16:45,200 --> 00:16:46,240
or Edwin,

322
00:16:46,280 --> 00:16:48,240
- Eduardo?
- It's just Ed.

323
00:16:48,320 --> 00:16:49,280
Would you sign it, please?

324
00:16:49,320 --> 00:16:51,640
- We've been waiting for hours.
- Okay.

325
00:16:51,920 --> 00:16:53,240
You and me both, sister.

326
00:16:54,960 --> 00:16:56,080
"Dear Ed,

327
00:16:57,160 --> 00:16:58,440
life's what you make it,

328
00:16:59,400 --> 00:17:01,960
so let's make it rock.

329
00:17:03,640 --> 00:17:07,520
Life's what you make it,

330
00:17:08,800 --> 00:17:10,120
so come on... "

331
00:17:10,160 --> 00:17:10,840
Come on.

332
00:17:11,880 --> 00:17:12,680
"Come on..."

333
00:17:12,720 --> 00:17:13,280
Come on.

334
00:17:14,160 --> 00:17:14,960
"Come on..."

335
00:17:14,960 --> 00:17:15,840
Come on!

336
00:17:15,840 --> 00:17:17,400
Okay. "Love, Hannah Montana."

337
00:17:22,520 --> 00:17:23,400
Hey, Dad! Uh,

338
00:17:23,560 --> 00:17:24,360
can you get my purse?

339
00:17:24,400 --> 00:17:26,280
I-I left it in the back seat of the car!

340
00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:30,520
Sure. What's another forty seconds
of my useless life.

341
00:17:36,560 --> 00:17:37,160
Okay.

342
00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:42,240
Jackson!

343
00:17:42,680 --> 00:17:44,080
I-I'm on the front porch.

344
00:17:44,320 --> 00:17:45,640
Dad's going to be here any minute.

345
00:17:46,160 --> 00:17:47,400
Are you doing okay?

346
00:17:49,880 --> 00:17:52,640
When you say "okay" --

347
00:17:53,920 --> 00:17:54,840
Oh, boy.

348
00:18:05,320 --> 00:18:06,760
Hi.

349
00:18:08,680 --> 00:18:12,040
Why am I staring at a bunch
of total strangers?

350
00:18:13,280 --> 00:18:15,280
They're not "total" strangers. Uh,

351
00:18:15,560 --> 00:18:17,720
this is Jerry the mailman. Uh,

352
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:21,640
Georgie,
the gas meter checker lady gal. Um,

353
00:18:22,560 --> 00:18:23,800
Louie delivered the cake

354
00:18:23,800 --> 00:18:25,560
and Frank's from the balloon store.

355
00:18:26,240 --> 00:18:27,320
Thanks for inviting me.

356
00:18:32,560 --> 00:18:34,240
Twenty years of blowing up balloons.

357
00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:38,600
Okay.

358
00:18:40,760 --> 00:18:41,760
And who are they?

359
00:18:42,360 --> 00:18:44,720
Oh. Uh, I found them at the beach.

360
00:18:45,160 --> 00:18:46,720
They call themselves,

361
00:18:46,800 --> 00:18:50,520
"The Aristocrats." Hit it, kids!

362
00:19:05,360 --> 00:19:07,800
This is the best you could do?

363
00:19:08,320 --> 00:19:10,840
As soon as Dad sees this, he's gonna--

364
00:19:13,760 --> 00:19:15,280
Surprise!

365
00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:20,320
Look like that.

366
00:19:23,880 --> 00:19:25,840
Happy birthday, Bobby!

367
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:28,280
It's, "Robby."

368
00:19:28,480 --> 00:19:30,440
Happy birthday, Robby!

369
00:19:45,960 --> 00:19:47,600
Didn't see that one coming. Did you, Daddy?

370
00:19:49,800 --> 00:19:51,400
And you thought we forgot.

371
00:19:58,440 --> 00:19:59,880
Thanks for coming, everybody!

372
00:20:01,080 --> 00:20:01,720
Thanks.

373
00:20:01,720 --> 00:20:03,160
You all are fantastic!

374
00:20:05,040 --> 00:20:06,560
You rock, Robby Ray!

375
00:20:08,480 --> 00:20:10,040
Next year, forty-one!

376
00:20:10,080 --> 00:20:12,880
You're all invited! Don't forget!

377
00:20:16,560 --> 00:20:19,160
Wow, what a party.

378
00:20:19,320 --> 00:20:20,400
Good times,

379
00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:22,280
- good times.
- Yeah.

380
00:20:22,560 --> 00:20:24,320
Happy birthday, big guy!

381
00:20:24,800 --> 00:20:26,040
Hold it, you two.

382
00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:28,320
Okay.

383
00:20:29,920 --> 00:20:31,280
We forgot your birthday.

384
00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:32,880
And when we tried to get people,

385
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:36,000
it was all "I'm out of town,"

386
00:20:36,360 --> 00:20:38,120
or "I'm in jail,"

387
00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:40,120
or "I'm giving birth."

388
00:20:42,160 --> 00:20:43,480
We're sorry, Daddy.

389
00:20:44,080 --> 00:20:45,240
We're selfish,

390
00:20:45,920 --> 00:20:49,120
horrible kids who don't deserve
a dad as wonderful as you.

391
00:20:49,720 --> 00:20:51,080
Let's not oversell it.

392
00:20:53,120 --> 00:20:54,000
No, she's right,

393
00:20:54,480 --> 00:20:55,680
I am a wonderful dad.

394
00:20:56,400 --> 00:20:57,920
And when you forgot my birthday,

395
00:20:57,960 --> 00:20:58,440
well,

396
00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:00,880
it just kind of made me feel like
you didn't appreciate me.

397
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:02,840
But we do appreciate you, Daddy.

398
00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:04,320
You got to believe that.

399
00:21:06,160 --> 00:21:06,920
Actually,

400
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:10,440
after the party y'all put together
this evening,

401
00:21:11,480 --> 00:21:12,440
I do believe you.

402
00:21:13,160 --> 00:21:16,120
Because it takes a lot of effort
to put together a train wreck like this.

403
00:21:18,200 --> 00:21:19,600
We really do love you, Dad.

404
00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:21,000
I know.

405
00:21:21,880 --> 00:21:24,360
Maybe next year,
you could just love me on time.

406
00:21:26,360 --> 00:21:28,600
Oh, come on. I'm a man. Men don't hug.

407
00:21:29,520 --> 00:21:30,760
Stewart men do.

408
00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:32,160
Yeah, we do.

409
00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:37,960
So, what'd you guys get me?

410
00:21:41,760 --> 00:21:45,160
Free mud pie from Bucky's Barbecue!

411
00:21:46,320 --> 00:21:47,480
It's from both of us.

412
00:21:50,560 --> 00:21:51,520
Hey.