1 00:00:00,901 --> 00:00:03,171 Previously on The Riches. 2 00:00:03,237 --> 00:00:05,106 [ Tires Screeching ] 3 00:00:07,975 --> 00:00:10,444 - Sorry. - [ Dahlia ] You wanna pretend to be the dead guy? 4 00:00:10,511 --> 00:00:12,613 You wanna wear his suits and me to be his dead wife? 5 00:00:12,680 --> 00:00:14,682 [ Cael ] Do you really think Dad has a plan? 6 00:00:14,748 --> 00:00:20,088 He stole the money. Ma lost the money. And now we're here in a dead guy's house. 7 00:00:20,154 --> 00:00:22,156 How'd y'all get in the front gate? We live here. 8 00:00:22,223 --> 00:00:23,491 Come and meet our new neighbors. 9 00:00:23,557 --> 00:00:25,859 - Hi, Nina. Can I come in? - Well, sure, honey. 10 00:00:25,926 --> 00:00:30,164 Doug Rich was a securities lawyer, whatever that is. 11 00:00:30,231 --> 00:00:34,602 This is not my specialty. I'm a securities lawyer. 12 00:00:34,668 --> 00:00:36,770 With your experience, it should be a piece of cake. 13 00:00:36,837 --> 00:00:40,007 Doug is a Republican. His best friend is Pete. 14 00:00:40,074 --> 00:00:42,976 Pete's a mortgage broker from Dallas. He's e-mailed twice about a golf trip. 15 00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:46,714 Why are we gettin' a bill from Mountain View Nursing Home for $4700 a month? 16 00:00:46,780 --> 00:00:48,882 [ Cael ] Must be where Cherien's mother is. 17 00:00:48,949 --> 00:00:51,252 Come on, Ma. We're getting outta here. 18 00:00:51,319 --> 00:00:54,822 - It's Cherien's mom. - She likes it here. 19 00:00:57,291 --> 00:00:59,827 Can you not read the sign? 20 00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:03,030 I've already availed my services to some of your neighbors. Your backdoor neighbor. 21 00:01:03,097 --> 00:01:06,033 Doug Rich? That's his name? 22 00:01:06,100 --> 00:01:08,502 So Doug Rich, he really screwed you over on that paint job. 23 00:01:08,569 --> 00:01:11,805 He can suck shit in hell for all I care. 24 00:01:11,872 --> 00:01:14,575 Hugh's not back yet. What do you mean, he's not back yet? 25 00:01:14,642 --> 00:01:16,110 Uh, where is he? What's he doing? 26 00:01:16,177 --> 00:01:20,414 - Hugh, where are you? - Somewhere in the desert, I'm guessin'. 27 00:01:20,481 --> 00:01:24,418 As of this moment, I am in control here. 28 00:01:29,223 --> 00:01:31,359 Aw, shit. 29 00:01:33,961 --> 00:01:36,130 [ Beeping ] 30 00:01:36,197 --> 00:01:38,199 [ Line Ringing ] 31 00:01:38,266 --> 00:01:40,368 [ Chattering ] 32 00:01:40,434 --> 00:01:42,570 Hey. 33 00:01:42,636 --> 00:01:46,507 Yeah, I just got an e-mail from, uh, Pete. You remember him. 34 00:01:46,574 --> 00:01:49,076 Yeah, he wants to come visit his friend Doug. 35 00:01:49,143 --> 00:01:51,845 When did he e-mail? Who e-mailed? 36 00:01:51,912 --> 00:01:53,481 Pete. Pete who? 37 00:01:53,547 --> 00:01:55,383 Pete, Doug's best friend. Best man at our wedding. 38 00:01:55,449 --> 00:01:56,884 Oh, that Pete. Still wants to come visit. 39 00:01:56,950 --> 00:02:00,188 Look, e-mail him back that both Cherien and I have the flu. 40 00:02:00,254 --> 00:02:03,457 - No, make it bubonic plague. - Bubonic plague? 41 00:02:03,524 --> 00:02:06,059 Yeah. Well, he's unlikely to come over if we got bubonic plague. 42 00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:08,296 That's dumb, honey. Say it's hepatitis. 43 00:02:08,362 --> 00:02:10,864 Hepatitis. And tell him it's more contagious than mono. 44 00:02:10,931 --> 00:02:12,600 You're late. No, I'm not. 45 00:02:12,666 --> 00:02:15,503 - It's 10:30. - It's only a couple hours. 46 00:02:15,569 --> 00:02:18,639 - Well, he's back. - Hugh? 47 00:02:18,706 --> 00:02:22,310 Oh, five days gone and he waltzes in with no warning? 48 00:02:22,376 --> 00:02:25,012 Yup, and he does not waltz in alone. 49 00:02:25,078 --> 00:02:27,948 Doug. Great to see you. 50 00:02:28,015 --> 00:02:29,917 [ Pats Back ] 51 00:02:29,983 --> 00:02:34,255 Cherien. Great to see you. 52 00:02:34,322 --> 00:02:36,524 Where the hell have you been? 53 00:02:36,590 --> 00:02:39,860 Aubrey, could you please give us a minute? 54 00:02:39,927 --> 00:02:41,895 Thank you. 55 00:02:41,962 --> 00:02:44,865 Uh, I needed a break. 56 00:02:44,932 --> 00:02:47,167 I really did, after that dinner party of yours. 57 00:02:47,235 --> 00:02:49,437 Got a little wild there. 58 00:02:49,503 --> 00:02:52,940 But I feel good now. I feel real good. 59 00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:56,244 - Obviously. - Hugh, five days. We were worried. 60 00:02:56,310 --> 00:02:59,880 Oh, no. There's no need for that. Old Hugh's not falling down any rabbit hole. 61 00:02:59,947 --> 00:03:02,450 No, uh, I went to Taos, did some spirit shit, 62 00:03:02,516 --> 00:03:06,754 some of that sweat lodge, naked men bangin' on drums thing. 63 00:03:06,820 --> 00:03:08,756 Cleaned myself right out. 64 00:03:08,822 --> 00:03:10,824 And there you met a-- 65 00:03:10,891 --> 00:03:13,227 Gymnast. That's GiGi. 66 00:03:13,294 --> 00:03:15,195 And she's a dancer. 67 00:03:15,263 --> 00:03:17,298 [ Chuckles ] 68 00:03:17,365 --> 00:03:22,236 After Taos, I felt so clean, uh, and kinda gay. 69 00:03:22,303 --> 00:03:26,073 Kinda freaked me out. Went right to Vegas. 70 00:03:26,139 --> 00:03:29,943 A miracle happened. I fell in love. 71 00:03:30,010 --> 00:03:33,514 I really fell in love, and in part because of... 72 00:03:33,581 --> 00:03:37,150 the inspirational nature of your relationship, 73 00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:39,353 I married her-- I did. 74 00:03:39,420 --> 00:03:40,988 Lookit there. Lookit. 75 00:03:41,054 --> 00:03:44,325 You don't fool around, do you? I trust my instincts, Doug. 76 00:03:44,392 --> 00:03:46,860 I always have. Oh. Tiny thing. 77 00:03:46,927 --> 00:03:51,499 I neglected to have her sign a prenup, so fix that, will you? 78 00:03:51,565 --> 00:03:54,167 - Prenup? - I learned the hard way. 79 00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:56,003 Everything needs to be in writing. Okay? 80 00:03:56,069 --> 00:03:58,306 And have it wrapped up by Saturday before the party. 81 00:03:58,372 --> 00:04:01,742 - What party? - My wedding reception. 82 00:04:03,143 --> 00:04:04,878 Come here, sugarplum. 83 00:04:04,945 --> 00:04:07,615 Mmm, mmm, mmm. Yeah. 84 00:04:21,061 --> 00:04:23,597 [ Arm Whirring ] 85 00:04:31,171 --> 00:04:33,273 [ Clears Throat ] 86 00:04:37,044 --> 00:04:39,347 Well, look at you all clean. 87 00:04:39,413 --> 00:04:41,315 Is that how you like it, Dale? Clean? 88 00:04:41,382 --> 00:04:43,917 No, ma'am, I certainly do not. 89 00:04:43,984 --> 00:04:46,787 You've been playing with my arm, haven't you? 90 00:04:48,889 --> 00:04:50,758 No. 91 00:04:52,059 --> 00:04:53,994 Haven't you? 92 00:04:54,061 --> 00:04:56,129 I like it. 93 00:04:56,196 --> 00:04:59,367 Oh, you like it. 94 00:05:00,468 --> 00:05:02,370 Well, I like that you like it. 95 00:05:02,436 --> 00:05:04,037 You do? Mm-hmm. 96 00:05:05,339 --> 00:05:08,742 [ Coughing ] Oh, sh-- 97 00:05:08,809 --> 00:05:12,780 Well, hi, darlin'. I was just checkin' the rat traps. 98 00:05:12,846 --> 00:05:16,450 They look good. Your Lucky Charms are on the table. 99 00:05:16,517 --> 00:05:18,952 - I'll be in in a second. - [ Everett Coughing ] 100 00:05:20,220 --> 00:05:23,357 Stop. 101 00:05:23,424 --> 00:05:26,293 Oh, you're bad. Oh, you have no idea. 102 00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:28,529 Oh. 103 00:05:42,109 --> 00:05:44,812 [ Arm Whirring ] [ Moans ] 104 00:05:50,150 --> 00:05:53,487 I just-- I don't understand. I don't. What is a prenup? 105 00:05:53,554 --> 00:05:59,493 Well, it's a kind of contract thing the buffers make before they tie the knot, 106 00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:02,195 'cause basically they don't trust each other. 107 00:06:02,262 --> 00:06:05,065 Then why would they get married? 108 00:06:05,132 --> 00:06:07,401 It's a different way of thinking, baby. I don't understand. 109 00:06:07,468 --> 00:06:10,170 How can you have a prenup if you already "nupped"? 110 00:06:10,237 --> 00:06:12,573 Then it's a postnup. 111 00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:14,908 And why would she sign that? 112 00:06:14,975 --> 00:06:18,812 I mean, she got him right where she wants him. Damn. 113 00:06:18,879 --> 00:06:21,815 Okay, we got a problem with your pal, Pete. 114 00:06:21,882 --> 00:06:23,951 Yeah? We're sick. We got hepatitis. 115 00:06:24,017 --> 00:06:26,086 Yeah, he's sorry about that, feels real bad. 116 00:06:26,153 --> 00:06:29,923 The thing is, he's gonna be in town and he really wants to see his old buddy, Doug. 117 00:06:29,990 --> 00:06:32,125 He's coming anyway. He's comin' anyway. 118 00:06:33,260 --> 00:06:35,162 Oh, shit, Wayne. 119 00:06:59,653 --> 00:07:01,655 So what are we supposed to do, Wayne, 120 00:07:01,722 --> 00:07:03,491 when he shows up here looking for Doug and Cherien Rich? 121 00:07:03,557 --> 00:07:06,594 How did he even get the address? Doug must have given it to him. 122 00:07:06,660 --> 00:07:10,130 We could go light out. We could stay in the R.V. for a couple of days. 123 00:07:10,197 --> 00:07:12,833 Why don't we just leave? I don't want to leave. 124 00:07:12,900 --> 00:07:14,902 I don't want to sleep in the R.V. anymore, Dad. 125 00:07:14,968 --> 00:07:17,370 - What time's he coming? - Sometime tomorrow. 126 00:07:17,437 --> 00:07:20,107 We just tell him the Riches have moved. We have no idea where they've gone. 127 00:07:20,173 --> 00:07:22,543 Real sorry. See you later. 128 00:07:22,610 --> 00:07:25,378 No, I say we tell him nothing about the Riches. 129 00:07:25,445 --> 00:07:28,482 We aren't the Riches. We don't know the Riches. We never met the Riches. 130 00:07:28,549 --> 00:07:33,687 When he shows up, we just tell him we're the-- the Montpierre family. 131 00:07:33,754 --> 00:07:36,423 Wayne and Dahlia Montpierre. 132 00:07:36,490 --> 00:07:38,526 - Dad, that's retarded. - I'm with her. 133 00:07:38,592 --> 00:07:41,261 - Sounds a lot like a sleeper. - No, it can work. 134 00:07:41,328 --> 00:07:45,132 Just e-mail him back. Tell him the fever has broken. Come around about 5:00. 135 00:07:45,198 --> 00:07:48,569 Okay? Right. We are gonna de-Rich this house. 136 00:07:48,636 --> 00:07:51,939 I have to pee. Oh, God in heaven. 137 00:07:59,913 --> 00:08:02,049 [ Beeps ] 138 00:08:02,115 --> 00:08:05,586 Hi-- Shit. [ Beeps ] 139 00:08:12,860 --> 00:08:15,863 Hi, this is-- Shit. [ Beeps ] 140 00:08:18,431 --> 00:08:21,001 [ Beeps ] 141 00:08:21,068 --> 00:08:23,003 Hi, leave a message. 142 00:08:29,109 --> 00:08:32,145 No, GiGi, it's not a prenup. It's a postnup. 143 00:08:32,212 --> 00:08:34,414 As in after nuptials. 144 00:08:34,481 --> 00:08:36,516 I know what it is. 145 00:08:36,584 --> 00:08:38,719 Bullshit. 146 00:08:39,987 --> 00:08:42,322 I assure you, this is a very normal legal document. 147 00:08:42,389 --> 00:08:46,493 A postnup is a typical thing you sign if you haven't signed a prenup. 148 00:08:46,560 --> 00:08:50,197 Well, if that's the way Hugh feels, then we should just call the whole thing off. 149 00:08:50,263 --> 00:08:52,099 I don't want anything of his. 150 00:08:52,165 --> 00:08:55,335 I'm-I'm a college graduate. I can take care of myself. 151 00:08:55,402 --> 00:08:57,871 I'm sure you can. I need a Coke. 152 00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:01,308 Ah. That didn't go too well, huh? 153 00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:04,211 Doug! 154 00:09:04,277 --> 00:09:08,716 From what I just saw, my bride doesn't look happy. 155 00:09:08,782 --> 00:09:10,784 She didn't buy the offer? 156 00:09:10,851 --> 00:09:13,053 I don't think that's the problem. 157 00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:15,656 Not even the part about the dance scholarship in her name? 158 00:09:20,327 --> 00:09:23,063 I really like your vest. 159 00:09:23,130 --> 00:09:25,666 Oh, thanks. 160 00:09:26,767 --> 00:09:28,936 You know, it's not what you guys think. 161 00:09:29,002 --> 00:09:31,872 I'm not-- I'm not a gold digger. 162 00:09:31,939 --> 00:09:35,175 Put myself through college by pole dancin'. So what? 163 00:09:35,242 --> 00:09:39,012 I don't need to justify myself to you or anybody else. 164 00:09:39,079 --> 00:09:40,648 No, you don't. 165 00:09:40,714 --> 00:09:44,752 She feels that if you're doubting the strength of the union so early, 166 00:09:44,818 --> 00:09:46,887 perhaps it's best you just walk away. 167 00:09:46,954 --> 00:09:50,023 What? She has a point. 168 00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:53,026 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What? I love her. 169 00:09:53,093 --> 00:09:55,362 I don't want to walk away. I don't want to walk away. 170 00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:58,766 I just don't want her walkin' away with half of Panco either, 171 00:09:58,832 --> 00:10:01,935 on the-- on the off, off, off, remote chance... 172 00:10:02,002 --> 00:10:04,604 that somethin' does go sour. 173 00:10:04,672 --> 00:10:08,541 I've been honest with Hugh. Told him I want more for my life. 174 00:10:08,608 --> 00:10:10,610 What's wrong with that? 175 00:10:10,678 --> 00:10:13,246 Nothin', honey. Everyone wants more. 176 00:10:13,313 --> 00:10:15,182 Even you? 177 00:10:15,248 --> 00:10:17,985 Workin' in a nice place like this, classy as you are? 178 00:10:18,051 --> 00:10:19,953 Yeah, even me. 179 00:10:21,755 --> 00:10:24,291 With you marrying Hugh, 180 00:10:24,357 --> 00:10:28,428 I figure I might move out of being a personal assistant. 181 00:10:28,495 --> 00:10:30,764 Maybe be a sales associate. 182 00:10:30,831 --> 00:10:33,667 I think you'd be real good at that. 183 00:10:33,734 --> 00:10:36,303 You carry yourself with real authority, you know. 184 00:10:36,369 --> 00:10:38,238 I do? Yeah. 185 00:10:38,305 --> 00:10:41,308 Thanks. That's somethin' I've been workin' on. 186 00:10:41,374 --> 00:10:46,780 Well, I'm workin' on-- I'm workin' on some things too. 187 00:10:46,847 --> 00:10:50,550 She's brought me love, Doug. I'm a changed man. 188 00:10:50,617 --> 00:10:54,922 Really? Took a long, hard look at my life over the last five days. 189 00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:56,990 I realized I was missin' somethin'. 190 00:10:58,491 --> 00:11:01,962 I was lonely. Yeah. 191 00:11:02,029 --> 00:11:05,866 Now, you and Cherien, you got somethin' there. 192 00:11:07,367 --> 00:11:12,172 It's-- Call it love, call it chemistry. Why shouldn't I have that? 193 00:11:12,239 --> 00:11:14,074 No reason. 194 00:11:14,141 --> 00:11:17,244 I figured you weren't ever gonna hand over Cherien. 195 00:11:17,310 --> 00:11:19,947 What? Then I met GiGi, 196 00:11:20,013 --> 00:11:24,918 and... it's just made me a different person. 197 00:11:24,985 --> 00:11:28,421 I'm a kinder, gentler person. 198 00:11:32,059 --> 00:11:34,762 So, fix that, will you? 199 00:11:36,596 --> 00:11:38,498 I gotta call the caterer. 200 00:11:38,565 --> 00:11:41,601 She wants a white wedding, and I'm gonna give it to her, by God. 201 00:11:41,668 --> 00:11:44,872 [ Shouting ] Kimmie, where's the goddamn latte I asked for? 202 00:11:44,938 --> 00:11:47,307 I need my caffeine! 203 00:11:49,409 --> 00:11:51,578 Please. 204 00:11:51,644 --> 00:11:54,948 Do you think Hugh really loves me, 205 00:11:55,015 --> 00:11:57,951 or am I just a little Vegas toy? 206 00:11:58,018 --> 00:12:03,256 I think he loves you. But, I mean, it's up to you to decide what you are. 207 00:12:03,323 --> 00:12:06,259 Yeah. 208 00:12:06,326 --> 00:12:09,797 Would you tell me if he didn't... love me? 209 00:12:11,698 --> 00:12:15,635 Yeah, if I was you, I wouldn't. It'd be easier to lie. 210 00:12:15,702 --> 00:12:18,939 [ Chuckles ] It's always easier to lie. 211 00:12:19,006 --> 00:12:21,975 Excuse me. Cherien, Dr. Cael just phoned. 212 00:12:22,042 --> 00:12:26,179 It's almost 5:00. Aw, shit. 213 00:12:26,246 --> 00:12:28,181 Bye. 214 00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:30,217 Bye. 215 00:12:40,794 --> 00:12:44,364 His car's out front. He just pulled up, but he's not gettin' out of the car. 216 00:12:44,431 --> 00:12:46,867 - Well, what's he doin'? - [ Cael ] Who knows? 217 00:12:46,934 --> 00:12:49,102 Okay, everybody ready? 218 00:12:51,171 --> 00:12:53,240 [ Car Door Closes ] Shit. 219 00:12:59,346 --> 00:13:01,982 [ Doorbell Rings ] 220 00:13:03,350 --> 00:13:05,252 Shit! 221 00:13:07,620 --> 00:13:09,990 Hello. Uh-- 222 00:13:10,057 --> 00:13:12,860 Hi. Is-- Is, uh, Doug here? 223 00:13:12,926 --> 00:13:15,863 Doug. Doug who? 224 00:13:17,730 --> 00:13:20,000 Doug Rich. 225 00:13:21,034 --> 00:13:24,037 No. Uh, no Doug Rich. 226 00:13:31,011 --> 00:13:33,680 Montpierre? Yes, I'm Wayne. 227 00:13:33,746 --> 00:13:36,483 And my wife, Dahlia-- Here she is. 228 00:13:36,549 --> 00:13:40,020 Darling, this is Pete-- Mincey. Pete Mincey. 229 00:13:40,087 --> 00:13:43,290 Hi. How do you do? I'm Dahlia Montpierre. 230 00:13:43,356 --> 00:13:46,193 He's looking for his friend, whose name is-- I am sorry. 231 00:13:46,259 --> 00:13:49,262 Doug Rich. He e-mailed me he was sick. 232 00:13:49,329 --> 00:13:51,865 That's why I brought him the soup. 233 00:13:51,932 --> 00:13:55,035 Oh, that's nice of you. Uh, may I, uh-- 234 00:13:55,102 --> 00:13:59,306 Yeah. His friend used our house as his home address. 235 00:13:59,372 --> 00:14:02,409 - And you've lived here-- - Little while now. 236 00:14:02,475 --> 00:14:07,147 - That's strange. - Now, honey, is this someone I should be concerned about? 237 00:14:07,214 --> 00:14:09,349 This Doug Rich person who seems to know where we live. 238 00:14:09,416 --> 00:14:11,985 And, pardon me, but is he involved in any kind of criminal element? 239 00:14:12,052 --> 00:14:15,188 Because we do have children to consider. 240 00:14:15,255 --> 00:14:18,892 No, certainly not. Are you sure? Because, uh, Dahlia is right. 241 00:14:18,959 --> 00:14:21,394 We have children. 242 00:14:21,461 --> 00:14:23,196 Come on. Go, go. 243 00:14:24,164 --> 00:14:26,699 - Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad. - Hey. 244 00:14:26,766 --> 00:14:28,735 We're goin' to the park, shoot some hoops with the neighborhood kids. 245 00:14:28,801 --> 00:14:31,538 - Okay, well, be back before dark. - [ Sam ] Sure. 246 00:14:31,604 --> 00:14:33,907 Take care. Hey, Mom. 247 00:14:33,974 --> 00:14:37,644 I just put the lasagna in the oven. Want to know if there's anything else I could do. 248 00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:40,513 No, sweetheart. Go on upstairs and finish your homework. Okay. 249 00:14:40,580 --> 00:14:43,183 Hi. 250 00:14:43,250 --> 00:14:45,452 They're good kids. I'm so sorry we couldn't help you. 251 00:14:45,518 --> 00:14:47,420 Yoohoo! [ Knocking ] 252 00:14:47,487 --> 00:14:50,423 The front was open, so-- Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know you had company. 253 00:14:50,490 --> 00:14:54,995 I was just going. The Montpierres have been more than kind. 254 00:14:55,062 --> 00:14:56,997 Uh-huh. Montpierres? Yeah. That is-- 255 00:14:57,064 --> 00:14:59,933 Oh, thank you for your generosity, 256 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:02,135 and thank you so much for my tray. 257 00:15:02,202 --> 00:15:05,105 For bringin' that back. And your understanding, Nina. 258 00:15:05,172 --> 00:15:08,141 Well, you're entirely welcome, 259 00:15:08,208 --> 00:15:11,378 Dahlia... Montpierre. 260 00:15:12,612 --> 00:15:15,482 So, Pete, I am sorry. This is a dead end. 261 00:15:15,548 --> 00:15:17,417 Yeah, so sorry, Pete. 262 00:15:17,484 --> 00:15:19,452 I never thought Doug would pull something like this. 263 00:15:19,519 --> 00:15:21,721 I mean, my best friend and he's avoiding me? 264 00:15:21,788 --> 00:15:23,690 Well, it does happen. 265 00:15:23,756 --> 00:15:27,627 I guess I'm just gonna have to try and track down his ex-wife, Jolinda. 266 00:15:27,694 --> 00:15:30,163 Pete! 267 00:15:30,230 --> 00:15:32,865 It's almost 6:00. Cocktail hour. 268 00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:36,369 We can't let you head out on the open road without having a cocktail, for God sakes. 269 00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:38,738 Yes, come and have a cocktail. Are you sure? 270 00:15:38,805 --> 00:15:41,308 Southern hospitality. 271 00:15:43,743 --> 00:15:46,346 So it's Jolinda Rich from Tampa? 272 00:15:46,413 --> 00:15:50,683 I-I think so. I only met her once. 273 00:15:53,987 --> 00:15:56,456 Got it. 274 00:15:56,523 --> 00:15:59,126 Told you he was good. 275 00:15:59,192 --> 00:16:02,695 Reception here is really awful. If you'd like to try our phone, there's one in the kitchen. 276 00:16:02,762 --> 00:16:07,267 - There might be more privacy. - Okay. Thank you. That was fast. 277 00:16:07,334 --> 00:16:10,570 It's on the counter. Oh, I think I hear Grandma. 278 00:16:15,575 --> 00:16:18,511 [ Beeping ] 279 00:16:22,949 --> 00:16:24,884 [ Phone Buzzing ] 280 00:16:24,951 --> 00:16:26,986 Hello? 281 00:16:27,054 --> 00:16:29,756 Uh, is this Jolinda? Jolinda Rich? 282 00:16:29,822 --> 00:16:31,758 Uh-huh. Who's this speaking? 283 00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:37,130 Uh, this is Pete Mincey from Tampa. I'm a friend of your ex-husband's. 284 00:16:37,197 --> 00:16:39,732 Oh, yeah. I remember you, Pete. 285 00:16:39,799 --> 00:16:42,702 Uh, good. Yeah. 286 00:16:42,769 --> 00:16:47,374 Okay. Um, listen, I'm-I'm looking for Doug. 287 00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:51,678 Oh, well, join the club. I ain't seen him since he ran out on us. 288 00:16:51,744 --> 00:16:54,147 Well, uh-- [ Stammers ] 289 00:16:54,214 --> 00:16:58,017 Um, uh, he sent me his new address in Edenfalls. 290 00:16:58,085 --> 00:17:00,120 He's been e-mailing me since he moved, 291 00:17:00,187 --> 00:17:05,358 but when I showed up here, it turns out to be completely the wrong place. 292 00:17:05,425 --> 00:17:07,994 - So, I'm wondering-- - Let me stop you right there, Pete. 293 00:17:08,061 --> 00:17:10,330 Um, you don't get it, do you? 294 00:17:10,397 --> 00:17:12,365 What-- What do you mean? 295 00:17:12,432 --> 00:17:17,204 The only one reason why Doug doesn't want to talk to someone is because he don't want to. 296 00:17:17,270 --> 00:17:20,540 All right? That's just how it is. 297 00:17:20,607 --> 00:17:23,243 No, no, you don't understand. We're really great friends. 298 00:17:23,310 --> 00:17:27,914 I was best man at his wedding. You know, the second one. 299 00:17:27,980 --> 00:17:32,452 I hate to be the one to tell you this, Pete, but Doug Rich was no real friend of yours. 300 00:17:32,519 --> 00:17:35,722 I-- I don't know what you're talking about. 301 00:17:35,788 --> 00:17:37,924 We were golf buddies. 302 00:17:37,990 --> 00:17:40,460 We went fishing together. Don't tell me he wasn't my friend. 303 00:17:40,527 --> 00:17:43,630 I-- I paid for his bachelor party, for God sakes. 304 00:17:43,696 --> 00:17:46,666 I'm sure you did, and I'm sure you paid for a lot of things, Pete. 305 00:17:46,733 --> 00:17:49,836 Uh, look, you know what? You clearly have your own issues with Doug, 306 00:17:49,902 --> 00:17:53,240 but don't confuse those with my situation, all right? 307 00:17:53,306 --> 00:17:57,510 Maybe you don't know the Doug I know. Okay? 308 00:17:57,577 --> 00:18:01,448 Maybe that's why he left you. You know what, Pete? 309 00:18:01,514 --> 00:18:04,016 Let me just tell you a few things about Doug here. 310 00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:06,486 The house was foreclosed on because of him. 311 00:18:06,553 --> 00:18:09,021 They shut off the electricity, shut off the phone, shut off the gas. 312 00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:12,392 I had to move me and the kids into a homeless shelter for a month, all right? 313 00:18:12,459 --> 00:18:15,195 He did not like you. He used to call you Pete the Patsy. 314 00:18:15,262 --> 00:18:17,063 He used to laugh at you behind your back. 315 00:18:17,130 --> 00:18:20,099 You know, he only let you hang out because he felt sorry for you. 316 00:18:20,167 --> 00:18:23,236 All right, so you are better off without him. You hear me? 317 00:18:23,303 --> 00:18:25,805 Move on with your life, forget all about Doug Rich. 318 00:18:25,872 --> 00:18:28,575 Doug Rich is a dick, all right? 319 00:18:28,641 --> 00:18:31,511 I'm sorry. Hey, kids. Stop it. 320 00:18:31,578 --> 00:18:34,113 I gotta go. My kids are killin' each other. 321 00:18:34,181 --> 00:18:39,219 Okay? All right. Good-bye. Goddamn it. 322 00:18:40,953 --> 00:18:42,755 [ Phone Beeps ] 323 00:18:53,099 --> 00:18:55,235 Um, uh-- 324 00:18:56,303 --> 00:18:58,205 So how'd it go? 325 00:18:58,271 --> 00:19:01,308 Doug Rich... 326 00:19:01,374 --> 00:19:04,744 is the biggest asshole in the universe. 327 00:19:04,811 --> 00:19:07,079 I know you. [ Laughs ] 328 00:19:07,146 --> 00:19:09,716 Poor Mama, completely senile. 329 00:19:09,782 --> 00:19:12,118 Loves crackers. Have another cracker there, Mama? 330 00:19:12,185 --> 00:19:16,556 - How did she get in here? - I don't know. It's, uh, her bath time. Right? 331 00:19:16,623 --> 00:19:19,459 - Mm-hmm. - Yeah. Come on, Grandma. 332 00:19:19,526 --> 00:19:23,263 - Was Jolinda any help? - [ Di Di ] You know, Ma, 333 00:19:23,330 --> 00:19:27,166 it turns out that Doug Rich is the biggest asshole in the universe. 334 00:19:27,234 --> 00:19:30,102 I'm so sorry. Really, I'm so sorry, Pete. 335 00:19:30,169 --> 00:19:33,673 Maybe it was for the best you couldn't find Doug, but terrific to meet you. 336 00:19:33,740 --> 00:19:36,175 - I need to talk to Leif. - Leaf? 337 00:19:36,243 --> 00:19:40,280 - Like a tree leaf? - Leif is my shrink. He's Norwegian. 338 00:19:40,347 --> 00:19:45,151 - I know you. - [ All Laugh ] 339 00:19:45,218 --> 00:19:48,521 Grandma, you smell so good. Let's go to the mall or somethin'. How about that? 340 00:19:48,588 --> 00:19:51,291 I'll take a large Cinnabon. 341 00:19:51,358 --> 00:19:53,760 Leif, it's Pete. 342 00:19:53,826 --> 00:19:56,629 You're not Cherien. 343 00:19:56,696 --> 00:19:59,832 I don't give a shit if you are on vacation at the Kea Lani. 344 00:19:59,899 --> 00:20:03,336 Something really major just went down, and we need to process. 345 00:20:03,403 --> 00:20:06,205 Call me as soon as you get this. 346 00:20:06,273 --> 00:20:09,409 You Norwegian sack of shit! 347 00:20:09,476 --> 00:20:13,346 Okay, Pete. Well, I am so sorry I couldn't be more help in finding Doug. 348 00:20:13,413 --> 00:20:16,148 But you have a good trip back. I was a joke to Doug! 349 00:20:16,215 --> 00:20:18,184 Yeah. He didn't even like me. 350 00:20:18,251 --> 00:20:20,353 Nah. All those years. [ Panting ] 351 00:20:20,420 --> 00:20:24,223 All those nights, and drivin' around and-- 352 00:20:24,291 --> 00:20:26,426 I'm hot! 353 00:20:28,328 --> 00:20:31,230 Talking all night. 354 00:20:31,298 --> 00:20:34,834 - My best friend. - Pete, I'm really sorry. 355 00:20:34,901 --> 00:20:37,804 My throat's closing up. 356 00:20:37,870 --> 00:20:41,207 I can't breathe. I-I gotta talk to Leif. 357 00:20:41,274 --> 00:20:43,710 He knows how to talk me down. 358 00:20:44,977 --> 00:20:47,414 I'm gonna go talk to Nina. 359 00:20:52,485 --> 00:20:55,722 So, when you call Leif, does he call back real quick? 360 00:20:58,224 --> 00:21:01,361 - Within a couple of days. - [ Groans ] 361 00:21:03,896 --> 00:21:07,534 Pete, um, as it turns out, 362 00:21:10,069 --> 00:21:12,004 I'm a shrink. 363 00:21:23,650 --> 00:21:26,619 Dahlia Montpierre? Yeah, I know, it's weird. 364 00:21:26,686 --> 00:21:28,788 I know, it's strange. It's-- 365 00:21:28,855 --> 00:21:31,023 You could say that. 366 00:21:34,226 --> 00:21:37,864 Well, no, see, the thing-- Pretending-- 367 00:21:37,930 --> 00:21:40,733 You know, Dahlia, for a while now I've been noticing... 368 00:21:40,800 --> 00:21:44,604 that things don't quite add up with you folks. 369 00:21:44,671 --> 00:21:46,639 Huh? 370 00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:50,643 I mean, the money in the lawn chair thing. 371 00:21:50,710 --> 00:21:53,045 Who keeps that much cash around? 372 00:21:54,681 --> 00:21:56,716 Or the way you're a dental hygienist one minute... 373 00:21:56,783 --> 00:21:59,652 and something completely different the next. 374 00:22:01,388 --> 00:22:05,157 Or how you got your kids into Rosemere in the middle of the year. 375 00:22:05,224 --> 00:22:07,594 Nobody does that. 376 00:22:07,660 --> 00:22:09,562 Yeah, I've been noticing things. 377 00:22:09,629 --> 00:22:12,331 Whole bunch of things. 378 00:22:14,367 --> 00:22:16,736 So I've been thinkin' about it, 379 00:22:16,803 --> 00:22:19,939 and I finally figured it out. 380 00:22:21,073 --> 00:22:23,710 Y'all are in the Witness Protection Program. 381 00:22:23,776 --> 00:22:26,212 Huh? What? 382 00:22:26,278 --> 00:22:28,948 Jesus. 383 00:22:31,784 --> 00:22:35,622 Yeah, I knew it. I knew it! 384 00:22:35,688 --> 00:22:37,657 Oh, don't worry about me. My lips are sealed. 385 00:22:37,724 --> 00:22:40,226 I won't tell Jim or Wes or-- 386 00:22:40,292 --> 00:22:42,929 Even though Jim thought y'all were strange from the get. 387 00:22:42,995 --> 00:22:47,400 So, who is that Pete guy? 388 00:22:47,467 --> 00:22:51,103 Uh, Pete-- Okay, look. 389 00:22:51,170 --> 00:22:53,873 It's okay. Shh, shh. 390 00:22:53,940 --> 00:22:56,275 I get it. 391 00:22:56,342 --> 00:22:58,445 I get it. 392 00:22:59,412 --> 00:23:01,514 Yeah. 393 00:23:01,581 --> 00:23:06,753 Well, thanks for not blowin' our cover with him. 394 00:23:08,721 --> 00:23:11,591 You're the only one who knows. 395 00:23:11,658 --> 00:23:14,494 That means the world to me. 396 00:23:17,229 --> 00:23:19,466 Thanks. 397 00:23:21,333 --> 00:23:23,402 Got you covered. [ Chuckles ] 398 00:23:33,513 --> 00:23:35,414 I have intimacy issues. 399 00:23:35,482 --> 00:23:38,017 Intimacy. That's what Leif says. 400 00:23:40,653 --> 00:23:42,755 He thinks I'm... 401 00:23:44,824 --> 00:23:49,328 anxious about... my penis. 402 00:23:49,395 --> 00:23:52,465 Yeah. Your penis? 403 00:23:52,532 --> 00:23:56,936 About... having it amputated. 404 00:23:59,405 --> 00:24:03,109 So you're having your penis amputated? 405 00:24:03,175 --> 00:24:05,244 God, no. Man, are you insane? 406 00:24:05,311 --> 00:24:08,047 It's-- It's a-- It's a primal fear. 407 00:24:08,114 --> 00:24:09,949 Yes, of course. 408 00:24:10,016 --> 00:24:13,152 Uh, that's what I'm talking about. 409 00:24:13,219 --> 00:24:15,087 Yeah, I'm talking about trust. 410 00:24:15,154 --> 00:24:18,658 Because Doug, 411 00:24:20,192 --> 00:24:22,228 he cut my dick off. 412 00:24:23,362 --> 00:24:26,065 So he cut your dick off? 413 00:24:26,132 --> 00:24:28,501 Well, my metaphorical dick, of course. 414 00:24:28,568 --> 00:24:32,605 Oh, your metaphorical dick. Of course. Thank God. 415 00:24:32,672 --> 00:24:37,510 And, uh, I wish I could tell him what it feels like. 416 00:24:37,577 --> 00:24:41,247 I am not a joke, Wayne. No. 417 00:24:41,313 --> 00:24:45,417 That cock shit mother thinks he can go around mocking me? 418 00:24:45,484 --> 00:24:47,954 I want to hurt him, Wayne. 419 00:24:48,020 --> 00:24:49,722 Yes. 420 00:24:51,390 --> 00:24:53,826 I want to hurt him like he hurt me. 421 00:24:53,893 --> 00:24:56,062 Yes. 422 00:24:56,128 --> 00:24:58,130 Do it. 423 00:24:58,197 --> 00:25:00,032 Really? [ Scoffs ] 424 00:25:00,099 --> 00:25:02,969 Absolutely. Absolutely. 425 00:25:04,270 --> 00:25:08,107 You don't have to take that Doug Rich shit anymore. 426 00:25:10,376 --> 00:25:13,713 You go back to your hotel room, 427 00:25:15,548 --> 00:25:18,551 get your computer, write an e-mail. 428 00:25:18,618 --> 00:25:20,920 Get it all out. 429 00:25:20,987 --> 00:25:24,957 Hurt him. Kick the shit out of him! 430 00:25:25,024 --> 00:25:27,293 The metaphorical shit, of course. 431 00:25:28,995 --> 00:25:32,064 And then you leave. That's it. 432 00:25:32,131 --> 00:25:34,033 Change your e-mail. 433 00:25:34,100 --> 00:25:38,905 Put as much distance between you and Doug Rich as you possibly can. 434 00:25:40,172 --> 00:25:45,144 And get him out of your mind forever. 435 00:25:50,116 --> 00:25:52,752 God, you're even better than Leif. 436 00:25:56,288 --> 00:26:00,459 She hasn't signed it. Okay, Hugh. 437 00:26:00,526 --> 00:26:02,629 I'll get it done. 438 00:26:02,695 --> 00:26:06,032 No. No, I got a plan. 439 00:26:07,700 --> 00:26:09,936 What's your plan? You. 440 00:26:10,002 --> 00:26:12,071 Me? You gotta talk to her, baby. 441 00:26:12,138 --> 00:26:15,341 Why? Because she doesn't trust me. 442 00:26:15,407 --> 00:26:16,876 [ Groans ] I am a lawyer. 443 00:26:16,943 --> 00:26:19,245 More importantly, I'm Hugh's lawyer. You know what? 444 00:26:19,311 --> 00:26:22,481 Here's the thing. I can't get behind this whole buffer prenup bullshit. 445 00:26:22,548 --> 00:26:24,416 You know? 446 00:26:24,483 --> 00:26:27,720 Is that really all they care about-- just their stuff? 447 00:26:27,787 --> 00:26:31,290 Hugh has been screwed over by a lot of his ex-wives. 448 00:26:31,357 --> 00:26:34,060 Well, maybe he had it comin'. 449 00:26:34,126 --> 00:26:36,028 I'm just sayin'. 450 00:26:36,095 --> 00:26:40,266 I don't want to be a buffer if it means livin' by a legal document. 451 00:26:40,332 --> 00:26:43,670 Okay, look at it this way. 452 00:26:45,504 --> 00:26:47,907 GiGi could end up with part of Panco. 453 00:26:47,974 --> 00:26:52,679 Do we really want a stripper in control of our future? 454 00:26:52,745 --> 00:26:55,648 She went to college. 455 00:26:55,715 --> 00:26:59,819 Well, do it for me. 456 00:27:00,753 --> 00:27:04,757 Do that woman-to-woman thing. 457 00:27:04,824 --> 00:27:06,893 You don't get sick of lyin'? 458 00:27:06,959 --> 00:27:10,797 This is not lying. This is creative reasoning. 459 00:27:10,863 --> 00:27:14,433 It's lying. It's all we do now. 460 00:27:14,500 --> 00:27:16,435 It's all we did as Travellers, baby. 461 00:27:16,502 --> 00:27:19,739 No, we never lied to our friends. 462 00:27:19,806 --> 00:27:22,975 We lie to the outside world, who the hell cares? 463 00:27:23,042 --> 00:27:25,177 Well, things are different here. 464 00:27:25,244 --> 00:27:29,481 If a lie can produce a better result, then we lie. 465 00:27:29,548 --> 00:27:31,684 If we want to stay here, 466 00:27:31,751 --> 00:27:34,754 if we want our kids to have this kind of life, 467 00:27:34,821 --> 00:27:39,258 go to school, learn to become somebody, then we gotta maintain the lie. 468 00:27:41,728 --> 00:27:46,432 Well, what if we start to forget the truth? 469 00:27:47,934 --> 00:27:51,437 You know, about who we are. 470 00:27:51,503 --> 00:27:54,606 We'll never forget who we are. 471 00:27:54,673 --> 00:27:57,977 It's locked into our D.N.A. 472 00:27:58,044 --> 00:28:00,012 Huh. 473 00:28:01,313 --> 00:28:04,483 I feel bad about what I said to that Pete guy. 474 00:28:04,550 --> 00:28:06,585 That was a mean lie. 475 00:28:06,652 --> 00:28:09,288 Yeah, but it did the trick, didn't it? 476 00:28:12,224 --> 00:28:14,426 I guess. 477 00:28:14,493 --> 00:28:16,428 Yeah. 478 00:28:17,596 --> 00:28:19,732 Had to do it. 479 00:28:19,799 --> 00:28:23,269 [ Aubrey ] Mm-hmm, yeah. I will have him call you. 480 00:28:23,335 --> 00:28:25,604 Hugh has called three times already. It's 8:15. 481 00:28:25,671 --> 00:28:29,141 He wants to know whether you fixed it. He's already had two Xanax and they're not working. 482 00:28:29,208 --> 00:28:31,577 I have to tell you, he was not this anxious in his other weddings. 483 00:28:31,643 --> 00:28:35,748 Well, maybe he really, really, really, really loves her. 484 00:28:35,815 --> 00:28:39,551 Mm-hmm. I put the Lloyd contract on your desk. I need it back today. 485 00:28:39,618 --> 00:28:42,288 [ Phone Rings ] All right. Hello. 486 00:28:42,354 --> 00:28:45,291 Pete. 487 00:28:45,357 --> 00:28:49,929 No, I am really, really, really, really busy. 488 00:28:55,768 --> 00:28:58,070 That was the best day of my life. 489 00:29:01,607 --> 00:29:04,043 Oh, man. You look hot. 490 00:29:04,110 --> 00:29:08,647 I ain't never been to Vegas. Mmm, kinda sucks. 491 00:29:08,714 --> 00:29:11,951 Well, look. Some mothers are bitches. 492 00:29:12,018 --> 00:29:14,486 That's all there is to it. Don't get me started on this. 493 00:29:14,553 --> 00:29:16,588 I thought Hugh really loved me. 494 00:29:16,655 --> 00:29:18,424 Well, he does. 495 00:29:18,490 --> 00:29:21,327 Then why's he trying to get me to sign that damn thing? 496 00:29:21,393 --> 00:29:24,096 You know, it's almost like he don't trust me. 497 00:29:24,163 --> 00:29:26,698 Honey, men are just like little boys sometimes. 498 00:29:26,765 --> 00:29:29,568 You know, they're scared someone's gonna come in and take away all their toys. 499 00:29:29,635 --> 00:29:35,007 Well, I wouldn't do that. I don't even care about his old money. 500 00:29:35,074 --> 00:29:37,409 Oh, bullshit. Everyone cares about money. 501 00:29:37,476 --> 00:29:40,779 I've had it and I've lost it, and we both know it is better to have it. 502 00:29:40,847 --> 00:29:42,815 It can't buy happiness. 503 00:29:42,882 --> 00:29:47,686 Yeah, but it can buy really great clothes and a lot of shoes and a huge house... 504 00:29:47,753 --> 00:29:52,591 and all this stuff, and then you can decide who it is you want to be. 505 00:29:52,658 --> 00:29:56,395 [ Sighs ] But you're right. It can't buy you happiness. 506 00:29:56,462 --> 00:30:00,532 Yeah, and it ain't romantic. No, it ain't romantic. 507 00:30:02,368 --> 00:30:06,772 Well, some women were just not meant to be mothers, right? 508 00:30:06,839 --> 00:30:09,508 Shit, I wouldn't sign this either. 509 00:30:09,575 --> 00:30:13,145 Not unless there was somethin' in it for me. What do you mean? 510 00:30:13,212 --> 00:30:15,982 I've been lookin' on the Internet. These things go both ways. 511 00:30:16,048 --> 00:30:20,319 You can put all kinds of shit in there. Hugh cheats on you, ka-ching, 512 00:30:20,386 --> 00:30:22,588 five hundred grand in your bank account. 513 00:30:22,654 --> 00:30:25,892 I read about that Catherine Zeta-Whozit. She put that in there. 514 00:30:25,958 --> 00:30:27,626 I could do that? Yeah. 515 00:30:27,693 --> 00:30:32,598 You don't want to do it doggy style, put it in your postnup. 516 00:30:32,664 --> 00:30:35,267 Oh. Oh. 517 00:30:35,334 --> 00:30:38,604 He's mean to your mother, a new Camaro. 518 00:30:38,670 --> 00:30:43,609 I could really do that? Honey, it's all part of the negotiation. 519 00:30:43,675 --> 00:30:47,179 You know? And let me be the first to tell you, that is all marriage is. 520 00:30:48,780 --> 00:30:50,917 Huh. 521 00:30:52,051 --> 00:30:55,621 Well, guess I could think about it. 522 00:30:55,687 --> 00:30:57,389 I would. 523 00:30:57,456 --> 00:31:00,960 No, I think you're worthy of love. You know what I think, Pete? 524 00:31:01,027 --> 00:31:02,995 I think this is Doug's problem, you know? 525 00:31:03,062 --> 00:31:05,231 He's obviously a superficial son of a bitch. 526 00:31:05,297 --> 00:31:07,866 He doesn't care for anyone. 527 00:31:07,934 --> 00:31:10,702 No, no. That's not a good idea. 528 00:31:10,769 --> 00:31:13,572 [ Sighs ] Why'd you have a drink? 529 00:31:15,041 --> 00:31:17,876 Really. How many? 530 00:31:17,944 --> 00:31:19,946 [ Whispering ] Who is it? [ Mouths Word ] 531 00:31:20,012 --> 00:31:22,514 Now, come on, Pete. Don't be dramatic. 532 00:31:22,581 --> 00:31:26,452 No, don't say that. I don't want to hear you talking like that. 533 00:31:26,518 --> 00:31:28,988 Look, Pete, I gotta go. I got a lot of customers here. 534 00:31:29,055 --> 00:31:32,491 Uh, patients. We use both words. 535 00:31:32,558 --> 00:31:36,595 Okay, okay. Well, you can try me, but I won't be here. 536 00:31:36,662 --> 00:31:39,798 Okay, good luck. Yeah, bye. 537 00:31:39,865 --> 00:31:41,700 Jesus, that guy is relentless. 538 00:31:41,767 --> 00:31:44,603 Well, what did he say? He said he had a tragic childhood. 539 00:31:44,670 --> 00:31:47,073 Said it all links back to abandonment issues with his mother... 540 00:31:47,139 --> 00:31:51,310 and that he's having difficulty maintaining perspective and that Doug was his best friend. 541 00:31:51,377 --> 00:31:55,114 Oh, God. I feel awful. It's terrible. 542 00:31:55,181 --> 00:31:57,916 Oh, trust me. He is just being a big baby. 543 00:31:57,984 --> 00:32:00,419 Well, how bad did he sound? Not that bad. 544 00:32:01,620 --> 00:32:04,556 I mean, I've heard worse. He'd been drinkin'. 545 00:32:04,623 --> 00:32:07,293 This is all our fault, you know. We pushed him way too far. 546 00:32:07,359 --> 00:32:10,362 He's just looking for a little attention, that's all. You call him back. Tell him-- 547 00:32:10,429 --> 00:32:12,931 Tell him what? We're his friends. 548 00:32:12,999 --> 00:32:15,434 We're not his friends. Well, tell him anyway. 549 00:32:15,501 --> 00:32:17,869 Why should I tell him? We're trying to get rid of him. Not like that. 550 00:32:17,936 --> 00:32:20,006 Call him back. 551 00:32:21,507 --> 00:32:24,977 [ Rapid Beeping ] [ Line Ringing ] 552 00:32:25,044 --> 00:32:27,179 [ Sighs ] 553 00:32:27,246 --> 00:32:31,750 Oh, my God. He's not answering. I'm going to the hotel. 554 00:32:31,817 --> 00:32:34,153 He's probably in the bathroom. 555 00:32:35,921 --> 00:32:38,290 No. Oh, crap. 556 00:32:39,558 --> 00:32:41,560 We gotta open the door. 557 00:32:48,667 --> 00:32:50,536 [ Knob Jiggling ] 558 00:32:50,602 --> 00:32:53,305 Baby, the door's not opening. Key doesn't work. 559 00:32:53,372 --> 00:32:55,374 Goddamn it. I gotta pee. 560 00:32:55,441 --> 00:32:59,145 - Can I help you? - Yes, three times today. 561 00:32:59,211 --> 00:33:01,813 I-- I-- Something's wrong with the card. 562 00:33:01,880 --> 00:33:04,883 I go downstairs and-- 563 00:33:04,950 --> 00:33:06,718 Ah, thank you. Thank you very much. 564 00:33:06,785 --> 00:33:09,888 You need some more towels? Soap? Oh, yeah. 565 00:33:09,955 --> 00:33:13,059 Pete? Pete! 566 00:33:14,660 --> 00:33:18,164 What are you doing here? We were worried about you. 567 00:33:18,230 --> 00:33:21,333 - You weren't answering your phone. - Come back inside, Pete. 568 00:33:21,400 --> 00:33:24,002 No. I am not comin' inside. 569 00:33:24,070 --> 00:33:26,905 Okay, look. Say you do jump. 570 00:33:26,972 --> 00:33:31,077 What's gonna happen? Your liver's gonna end up comin' out your ear. 571 00:33:31,143 --> 00:33:34,813 Your brain's gonna be all over the pavement. And then someone's gotta clean it up. 572 00:33:34,880 --> 00:33:37,983 Is that what you want? You know, at the very least, it's a cliché. 573 00:33:38,050 --> 00:33:42,854 Pete, Doug's not worth it. 574 00:33:42,921 --> 00:33:44,890 My life sucks. 575 00:33:44,956 --> 00:33:46,992 I don't have any friends. 576 00:33:47,059 --> 00:33:49,628 Just lost my job at Balman-Roger. 577 00:33:51,897 --> 00:33:53,765 My wife moved out. 578 00:33:55,634 --> 00:34:00,072 I-I came here to talk to my best buddy, Doug, 579 00:34:00,139 --> 00:34:02,208 and he shits on me too. 580 00:34:02,274 --> 00:34:04,510 - Look, Pete-- - Don't come any closer! 581 00:34:04,576 --> 00:34:07,846 - I mean it. - Okay, we could do a session right now. 582 00:34:07,913 --> 00:34:11,217 I don't want to talk to you. 583 00:34:11,283 --> 00:34:15,121 I don't want to talk to anyone-- you, Leif, Doug. 584 00:34:16,288 --> 00:34:18,524 You're all full of shit. 585 00:34:19,591 --> 00:34:21,160 Pete! What? 586 00:34:21,227 --> 00:34:23,295 We're all lonely! No, you're not. 587 00:34:23,362 --> 00:34:25,731 You have Wayne. No. 588 00:34:25,797 --> 00:34:30,802 Pete, everyone is lonely at one time or another. 589 00:34:32,037 --> 00:34:34,706 And God knows everyone gets lied to. 590 00:34:34,773 --> 00:34:37,876 It's just how it is, man. 591 00:34:37,943 --> 00:34:41,180 Life is hard sometimes. 592 00:34:42,748 --> 00:34:46,152 Look, a couple years back, I was right where you are now, 593 00:34:46,218 --> 00:34:49,388 and I had a real easy way to do it. 594 00:34:49,455 --> 00:34:53,159 I just got interrupted, so I didn't do it. 595 00:34:54,293 --> 00:34:56,962 I woke up the next mornin'. I don't know-- 596 00:34:57,028 --> 00:34:59,531 I just felt a little better. 597 00:35:01,167 --> 00:35:04,970 Pete, you might wake up tomorrow and just feel a little better. 598 00:35:05,036 --> 00:35:08,740 You jump, you ain't ever gonna know. 599 00:35:11,710 --> 00:35:13,579 Come on. 600 00:35:15,514 --> 00:35:19,185 Hell, if you don't feel better, there's always tomorrow. 601 00:35:20,752 --> 00:35:22,488 What, to kill myself? 602 00:35:22,554 --> 00:35:26,592 Yeah. What's your hurry? 603 00:35:31,129 --> 00:35:33,332 Please come in. 604 00:35:42,341 --> 00:35:44,343 [ Dale ] Well, that's better. 605 00:35:45,944 --> 00:35:48,814 Well, it oughta be. I maxed out the credit card on that one. 606 00:35:48,880 --> 00:35:51,450 Really? You have a limit? 607 00:35:51,517 --> 00:35:53,919 Oh, Everett's got me on allowance for everything. 608 00:35:53,985 --> 00:35:58,290 I hate it, but what are you gonna do? Sure as hell ain't gonna work. 609 00:35:58,357 --> 00:36:01,893 Suit like this makes me look like an asshole... 610 00:36:01,960 --> 00:36:04,230 in a good way. 611 00:36:05,764 --> 00:36:08,033 A suit like this... 612 00:36:08,099 --> 00:36:10,502 could make me fall in love with you. 613 00:36:15,073 --> 00:36:18,544 Now, where am I gonna wear this suit? You got any ideas? 614 00:36:18,610 --> 00:36:21,880 I might have a few. What? 615 00:36:28,287 --> 00:36:30,256 Take off the arm. 616 00:36:35,861 --> 00:36:37,796 Slowly. 617 00:36:41,433 --> 00:36:43,535 Will you call us from the airport? 618 00:36:44,736 --> 00:36:46,538 Thanks. Bye. 619 00:36:49,107 --> 00:36:51,677 [ Door Closes ] 620 00:36:58,417 --> 00:37:00,886 Did you mean what you said in there... 621 00:37:00,952 --> 00:37:03,822 about killing yourself? 622 00:37:03,889 --> 00:37:06,658 Well, everyone's thought about it at one time or another. 623 00:37:17,336 --> 00:37:20,306 ** [ Disco ] 624 00:37:23,208 --> 00:37:25,076 [ Sighs ] 625 00:37:25,143 --> 00:37:27,713 [ Dahlia ] Jesus. GiGi hit the jackpot. 626 00:37:27,779 --> 00:37:30,316 [ Wayne ] Of course, she has to live with Hugh. 627 00:37:35,321 --> 00:37:37,255 Hi, guys. 628 00:37:37,323 --> 00:37:39,224 Hey. Tony. 629 00:37:39,291 --> 00:37:41,192 Hey, Doug. Kimmie. 630 00:37:41,259 --> 00:37:43,028 Hi. Hi. Aubrey. 631 00:37:43,094 --> 00:37:46,097 Isn't this great? I love it when Hugh gets married. 632 00:37:46,164 --> 00:37:48,099 He throws the best parties. Yeah. 633 00:37:48,166 --> 00:37:51,603 Let's hope this one works out. His divorces aren't nearly as much fun. 634 00:37:51,670 --> 00:37:55,273 - [ Aubrey ] Cherien, you look fantastic. - Thanks. 635 00:37:55,341 --> 00:37:59,511 Well, look who's here. It's the Riches. 636 00:38:01,046 --> 00:38:03,982 Doug. 637 00:38:04,049 --> 00:38:06,017 Cherien. 638 00:38:10,121 --> 00:38:12,724 Howdy, neighbors. 639 00:38:12,791 --> 00:38:15,126 Dale. 640 00:38:15,193 --> 00:38:18,730 So how do you know-- Dale did some work for me on my house. 641 00:38:18,797 --> 00:38:20,932 Turns out we got a lot in common. 642 00:38:20,999 --> 00:38:25,203 Hartley tells me that you two were involved in a legal matter. 643 00:38:25,270 --> 00:38:27,272 She says you are quite a lawyer. 644 00:38:27,339 --> 00:38:29,174 You better believe it. 645 00:38:29,240 --> 00:38:32,511 Doug here's the best goddamn lawyer I ever worked with. 646 00:38:32,578 --> 00:38:36,081 Although, I don't know what you got against doggy style. 647 00:38:36,147 --> 00:38:38,083 [ Clears Throat ] Hartley. 648 00:38:39,317 --> 00:38:41,653 How are you? How's young Everett? 649 00:38:41,720 --> 00:38:45,457 Fine, Hugh. Just fine. This is my friend Dale Malloy. 650 00:38:45,524 --> 00:38:47,693 Glad to have you. Pleasure. 651 00:38:47,759 --> 00:38:51,162 [ Coughing ] I gotta get a drink. 652 00:38:51,229 --> 00:38:56,334 - [ Hugh ] Oh, the bar's over there. - Will you folks excuse us? 653 00:38:56,402 --> 00:39:00,939 You're lucky I'm in love. Otherwise, I'd kick your asses right outta here. 654 00:39:01,006 --> 00:39:02,941 Oh, look, Dale. Shrimp. 655 00:39:04,410 --> 00:39:06,745 [ Sighs ] Dahlia. 656 00:39:06,812 --> 00:39:09,748 Shit, Wayne. Ken must have told him where we are. 657 00:39:09,815 --> 00:39:12,551 What is he doin' with the one-armed bandit? 658 00:39:12,618 --> 00:39:15,320 Dale is a psycho. I know he's playing some kind of game. 659 00:39:15,387 --> 00:39:17,423 I'm gonna talk to him. 660 00:39:25,731 --> 00:39:28,400 Hey, there. I've been looking for you everywhere. 661 00:39:28,467 --> 00:39:30,569 Oh, Nina. You look so pretty. Where's Jim? 662 00:39:30,636 --> 00:39:33,872 Jim hates Hugh. He and Wes are home, baking. 663 00:39:33,939 --> 00:39:37,242 Wes has got a plan to open up one of those cupcake places. 664 00:39:37,308 --> 00:39:40,245 Well, that's nice, 'cause everyone like cupcakes. You know, I gotta find Doug. 665 00:39:40,311 --> 00:39:42,881 Dahlia, can we talk? Can we have coffee tomorrow mornin'? 666 00:39:42,948 --> 00:39:44,716 No, now. Okay. 667 00:39:46,251 --> 00:39:48,286 Doug. 668 00:39:48,353 --> 00:39:50,722 Dale. Here, let me top you off. 669 00:39:50,789 --> 00:39:52,924 [ Champagne Pouring ] 670 00:39:52,991 --> 00:39:56,495 We have a lot to talk about, my friend. Mm-hmm. 671 00:39:56,562 --> 00:39:59,531 So, who dressed you? I did. 672 00:39:59,598 --> 00:40:02,167 So I seen the kids around the neighborhood. 673 00:40:02,233 --> 00:40:06,438 Dahlia drivin' a big fancy-- Oh, I mean, Cherien drivin' a big fancy car. 674 00:40:06,505 --> 00:40:10,008 Wow, you're doin' really well for yourself bein' a successful attorney. 675 00:40:15,013 --> 00:40:18,016 You know, in some ways, this is the happiest I've been in a long time. 676 00:40:18,083 --> 00:40:22,721 It's been a relief, this whole business with Jim. 677 00:40:22,788 --> 00:40:25,757 I mean, like a weight's come off our shoulders. 678 00:40:25,824 --> 00:40:29,027 I never realized how hard it was to keep living a lie. 679 00:40:30,996 --> 00:40:33,599 Or how lonely. 680 00:40:34,933 --> 00:40:38,670 Here's the other thing I've come to. 681 00:40:38,737 --> 00:40:40,939 I can't abide being lied to anymore. 682 00:40:42,307 --> 00:40:44,676 Not by people I care about. 683 00:40:46,277 --> 00:40:48,179 Uh-- 684 00:40:48,246 --> 00:40:51,550 Y'all aren't in the Witness Protection Program, are you? 685 00:40:51,617 --> 00:40:55,020 'Cause I've been thinking about it, and it just doesn't quite make sense. 686 00:40:55,086 --> 00:41:00,258 I mean, if that Pete guy was with the, say, F.B.I., then he'd know... 687 00:41:00,325 --> 00:41:03,695 you were in the Witness Protection Program and that you were the Riches. 688 00:41:03,762 --> 00:41:06,965 That's the name they'd given you. 689 00:41:07,032 --> 00:41:08,634 Mmm. 690 00:41:08,700 --> 00:41:12,237 I don't want to put you on the spot. 691 00:41:12,303 --> 00:41:15,206 What is going on? 692 00:41:18,343 --> 00:41:20,712 All right. All right. 693 00:41:22,848 --> 00:41:27,285 What? You don't have to tell me anything. 694 00:41:27,352 --> 00:41:29,220 I just wish you wouldn't lie to me. 695 00:41:32,691 --> 00:41:35,861 You're my friend, Nina. 696 00:41:35,927 --> 00:41:38,229 I would never lie to you about that. 697 00:41:40,766 --> 00:41:44,135 [ Hugh ] Hey, quiet, everybody! Everybody quiet! 698 00:41:44,202 --> 00:41:46,137 Listen up, everybody! 699 00:41:46,204 --> 00:41:48,707 Come on over here, honey. 700 00:41:49,708 --> 00:41:52,510 I want to propose a toast. 701 00:41:52,578 --> 00:41:56,414 To the most beautiful gal I've ever set eyes on. 702 00:41:56,481 --> 00:42:00,619 I've known lots of great women in my day. 703 00:42:00,686 --> 00:42:03,855 But I've never known happiness until-- 704 00:42:03,922 --> 00:42:06,491 until I met GiGi last week. 705 00:42:06,558 --> 00:42:09,060 What happened? This little girl... 706 00:42:09,127 --> 00:42:12,631 has shown me the true meaning of love. 707 00:42:14,432 --> 00:42:17,435 She's got her hands on my heart, and she hasn't let go, 708 00:42:17,502 --> 00:42:20,138 and I thank God for that. 709 00:42:20,205 --> 00:42:25,143 So, to my beautiful bride, GiGi Panetta! 710 00:42:25,210 --> 00:42:28,179 [ All Cheering ] 711 00:42:28,246 --> 00:42:31,583 Hear, hear! 712 00:42:31,650 --> 00:42:34,219 Oh, oh. 713 00:42:34,285 --> 00:42:37,322 And, uh, here's a little Louisiana surprise. 714 00:42:37,388 --> 00:42:39,658 [ Chuckles ] 715 00:42:41,627 --> 00:42:46,832 ** [ Piano ] * We're back from Vegas and everything is right * 716 00:42:46,898 --> 00:42:51,770 * It's the same this morning as it was last night * 717 00:42:51,837 --> 00:42:54,439 * You're the one, baby * 718 00:42:54,505 --> 00:42:57,575 I can't do it. * You the one * 719 00:42:57,643 --> 00:43:02,047 I can't do it. I want to do it for you, but I can't be a buffer. 720 00:43:02,113 --> 00:43:04,549 You're not a buffer. You're a Traveller. 721 00:43:04,616 --> 00:43:08,286 No, I'm not. Not anymore. 722 00:43:08,353 --> 00:43:12,090 I don't belong there either now, 'cause I know too much... 723 00:43:12,157 --> 00:43:15,060 about all this, all these people. 724 00:43:16,828 --> 00:43:21,399 I'm not Dahlia Malloy, and I'm not Cherien Rich. 725 00:43:21,466 --> 00:43:26,337 Now, you said we were gonna come here, be somebody, and I don't know who that is. 726 00:43:27,673 --> 00:43:30,709 I know who you are. You're my wife. 727 00:43:30,776 --> 00:43:32,744 You're the mother of my children. 728 00:43:32,811 --> 00:43:36,147 And you're the most important person in my life. 729 00:43:37,816 --> 00:43:40,385 And that's who you'll always be, wherever we are. 730 00:43:40,451 --> 00:43:45,390 I cannot make a truth out of all the lies I'm telling myself and everyone else. 731 00:43:45,456 --> 00:43:48,694 * GiGi, you're the one * 732 00:43:50,361 --> 00:43:52,330 ** [ Ends ] 733 00:43:52,397 --> 00:43:54,700 You're the one, baby! 734 00:43:56,434 --> 00:43:59,404 All right, y'all! Let's get this party started! Come on! 735 00:43:59,470 --> 00:44:03,541 Here, take the car. Go home and be with the children. 736 00:44:03,608 --> 00:44:05,911 Okay? 737 00:44:05,977 --> 00:44:08,413 I will look for Dale. 738 00:44:08,479 --> 00:44:11,116 ** [ Disco ] 739 00:44:27,265 --> 00:44:30,568 So what do we do? I am not going back to camp. 740 00:44:30,635 --> 00:44:34,505 No one's asking you to. Goddamn it, Cael. You know, this is all your fault. 741 00:44:34,572 --> 00:44:37,575 If you wouldn't have gone to see Tammy, then they wouldn't even know where we are. 742 00:44:37,642 --> 00:44:40,278 They would have found us sooner or later. No, they wouldn't have, Cael! 743 00:44:40,345 --> 00:44:43,481 All right, come on. Why don't you just admit it, Cael? You blew it. 744 00:44:43,548 --> 00:44:47,018 You ruined this for everyone. You know what? You're never gonna be a buffer, Di. 745 00:44:47,085 --> 00:44:49,721 Drop it. It's never gonna happen. You're a Traveller. 746 00:44:49,788 --> 00:44:51,823 You're always gonna be a Traveller. Screw you! 747 00:44:51,890 --> 00:44:56,394 You're a piece of shit! Oh, knock it off. Jesus. 748 00:44:56,461 --> 00:44:59,430 Think all your yelling and screaming's gonna do anything? 749 00:45:01,666 --> 00:45:03,769 It's over. 750 00:45:05,470 --> 00:45:07,538 Maybe we don't do anything. 751 00:45:07,605 --> 00:45:10,175 No, Dad, we have to do something. Dale came here for us. 752 00:45:10,241 --> 00:45:13,611 He's not goin' anywhere. Dale seems to have been here for a while now. 753 00:45:13,678 --> 00:45:16,915 He could have blown our cover at any point, and he didn't. Why is that? 754 00:45:16,982 --> 00:45:19,150 He's Dale. He's workin' an angle. I don't know. 755 00:45:19,217 --> 00:45:22,353 Well, we gotta work out what the angle is and work it against him. 756 00:45:22,420 --> 00:45:25,223 Then why the hell is he hangin' out with that stupid Hartley Underwood chick? 757 00:45:25,290 --> 00:45:29,460 Dale has got a plan. Okay, what? 758 00:45:29,527 --> 00:45:31,763 I don't know. 759 00:45:31,830 --> 00:45:35,767 I guess he'll let us know sooner or later. 760 00:45:35,834 --> 00:45:38,369 What are we supposed to do in the meantime, Dad? 761 00:45:39,971 --> 00:45:43,508 Nothing. We go about our lives. 762 00:45:43,574 --> 00:45:48,613 We go to school, we go to work, we wait for him to make the first move. 763 00:45:48,679 --> 00:45:53,284 Well, that's a shit plan, Dad. Well, we leave and he wins. 764 00:45:53,351 --> 00:45:56,121 - We stay and-- - And we're in it with him. 765 00:45:56,187 --> 00:45:59,657 And it's all up for grabs. 766 00:45:59,724 --> 00:46:01,927 I'm bettin' on us. 767 00:46:01,993 --> 00:46:04,095 What do you think? 768 00:46:05,596 --> 00:46:07,999 Yeah? 769 00:46:15,140 --> 00:46:19,377 Doug, there's someone in your office waiting for you. I told him to wait out here. 770 00:46:19,444 --> 00:46:23,181 But he insisted on going inside. He said he's a friend of yours. 771 00:46:23,248 --> 00:46:25,383 Thank you, Aubrey. Mm-hmm. 772 00:46:38,663 --> 00:46:40,798 Dale? 773 00:46:43,301 --> 00:46:45,503 Pete. 774 00:46:45,570 --> 00:46:47,772 Guess you're probably surprised to see me here, Wayne. 775 00:46:47,839 --> 00:46:49,908 A bit. 776 00:46:49,975 --> 00:46:54,312 Well, I was on my way to the airport this morning, but I had a little time to kill, 777 00:46:54,379 --> 00:46:57,648 and I thought I'd drop by your house to thank you for all your kindness. 778 00:46:57,715 --> 00:46:59,517 Huh. 779 00:46:59,584 --> 00:47:02,120 Only you folks weren't home. But your neighbor was. 780 00:47:02,187 --> 00:47:04,155 Jim, I think his name is. 781 00:47:04,222 --> 00:47:07,592 Jim. That's right. 782 00:47:07,658 --> 00:47:10,061 Lovely man. 783 00:47:10,128 --> 00:47:13,131 But, boy, does he like to talk, 784 00:47:13,198 --> 00:47:18,169 especially about his neighbors-- the Riches. 785 00:47:20,471 --> 00:47:23,241 So, Wayne, 786 00:47:23,308 --> 00:47:26,177 you and I both know you're not Doug Rich. 787 00:47:27,178 --> 00:47:29,981 Though everyone here... 788 00:47:30,048 --> 00:47:33,051 seems to think you are. 789 00:47:33,118 --> 00:47:35,553 Which leads me to a couple of questions. 790 00:47:35,620 --> 00:47:37,923 Who are you? 791 00:47:40,325 --> 00:47:44,062 And where the hell is my best friend, Doug Rich?