1
00:00:01,167 --> 00:00:03,670
Junior, don't you ever run away
from me like that again.
2
00:00:03,670 --> 00:00:04,838
Listen to me.
3
00:00:04,838 --> 00:00:06,172
Hold on, hold on. Hold on.
4
00:00:06,172 --> 00:00:08,742
Everybody go to
their neutral corners, okay?
5
00:00:08,742 --> 00:00:09,909
All right.
6
00:00:09,909 --> 00:00:12,579
Now, Calvin, man,
Uncle Curtis told me
7
00:00:12,579 --> 00:00:14,180
you guys were going through it,
man.
8
00:00:14,180 --> 00:00:16,116
I swung by to see
if everything was okay.
9
00:00:16,116 --> 00:00:17,817
I see you chasing him
down the street.
10
00:00:17,817 --> 00:00:19,753
He just ran out, just took off.
11
00:00:20,120 --> 00:00:21,554
Why would he run
down the street like that?
12
00:00:21,554 --> 00:00:23,923
I don't know, Junior, why would
you do something like that?
13
00:00:23,923 --> 00:00:25,892
-I don't know.
-You don't know?
14
00:00:25,892 --> 00:00:28,027
Junior, what's, what's up, man?
15
00:00:28,862 --> 00:00:29,996
I wanna go home.
16
00:00:29,996 --> 00:00:31,297
What, because I put you
on punishment?
17
00:00:31,297 --> 00:00:33,500
No, you took my games away.
They're mine, not yours.
18
00:00:33,900 --> 00:00:36,202
So why do you think your dad
took your games away?
19
00:00:36,569 --> 00:00:38,571
Because I threw the keys
at my mom.
20
00:00:38,571 --> 00:00:39,639
You did what?
21
00:00:40,006 --> 00:00:41,341
It was an accident.
22
00:00:41,341 --> 00:00:43,076
Yeah, it didn't sound
like no accident.
23
00:00:43,076 --> 00:00:44,544
Your mom said you picked up
the keys,
24
00:00:44,544 --> 00:00:46,079
threw them
and hit her in the face.
25
00:00:46,079 --> 00:00:47,580
That don't sound
like an accident to me.
26
00:00:47,580 --> 00:00:49,082
I don't care
if you don't believe me.
27
00:00:49,082 --> 00:00:50,650
Like, I wanna go home.
28
00:00:51,017 --> 00:00:52,152
-I'm out of here.
-No.
29
00:00:52,152 --> 00:00:53,753
You gonna go to your room.
30
00:00:54,087 --> 00:00:55,822
You need to listen to your dad.
31
00:00:57,891 --> 00:00:59,626
[both sighing]
32
00:00:59,626 --> 00:01:02,328
Man, Calvin, you okay?
33
00:01:02,762 --> 00:01:04,097
What's going on with him?
34
00:01:04,097 --> 00:01:06,533
I don't understand why that boy
is so angry.
35
00:01:09,670 --> 00:01:15,609
[music]
36
00:01:33,961 --> 00:01:35,763
Hey, thanks for the invite, C.J.
37
00:01:36,096 --> 00:01:38,299
Coming over here
is good for Junior.
38
00:01:38,299 --> 00:01:40,034
Yeah, man, the twins love it
39
00:01:40,034 --> 00:01:42,069
when their big cousin Junior
comes over.
40
00:01:42,503 --> 00:01:44,571
Hey, by the way,
y'all good, cuzzo?
41
00:01:44,571 --> 00:01:46,907
'Cause Junior look like
somebody stole his cornbread.
42
00:01:47,141 --> 00:01:49,143
He still ain't talking to me.
43
00:01:49,143 --> 00:01:52,079
Wow, this new generation
something else, huh?
44
00:01:52,079 --> 00:01:53,280
Uh, the new generation?
45
00:01:53,280 --> 00:01:55,215
Your generation is the same.
46
00:01:55,215 --> 00:01:57,951
And why is he allowed
to not talk to you?
47
00:01:57,951 --> 00:01:59,753
Right. Man up, cuz.
48
00:01:59,753 --> 00:02:01,555
It's just hard, man.
49
00:02:01,822 --> 00:02:03,691
Yeah, who you telling?
50
00:02:03,691 --> 00:02:05,826
A wise man once told me,
51
00:02:06,360 --> 00:02:10,864
parenting is not a sprint,
it's a marathon.
52
00:02:11,332 --> 00:02:12,933
Pops told you that too, huh?
53
00:02:12,933 --> 00:02:14,201
[laughing]
54
00:02:14,201 --> 00:02:17,571
Oh, Uncle Curtis?
I thought a wise man said it.
55
00:02:18,339 --> 00:02:20,274
He said that to me
a million times.
56
00:02:20,274 --> 00:02:21,675
I lean on it every day.
57
00:02:23,277 --> 00:02:24,445
-Aunt Ella.
-Mm-hmm?
58
00:02:24,445 --> 00:02:25,746
Hey, the baby is down.
59
00:02:25,746 --> 00:02:28,115
Oh, she been down, baby.
60
00:02:28,115 --> 00:02:29,483
But you know me.
61
00:02:29,483 --> 00:02:32,219
I had to just get my daily fix
62
00:02:32,219 --> 00:02:34,688
and just stare
at the little angel
63
00:02:34,688 --> 00:02:36,957
for a little while.
[clicking tongue baby talk]
64
00:02:36,957 --> 00:02:38,592
She don't smell like no angel.
65
00:02:39,326 --> 00:02:41,628
Don't talk about
my baby like that.
66
00:02:41,929 --> 00:02:43,464
Sorry about that smell, Aunty.
67
00:02:43,464 --> 00:02:45,399
Well, that's the thing
about children.
68
00:02:45,399 --> 00:02:48,202
It's never sweet-smelling roses
all the time.
69
00:02:48,202 --> 00:02:50,037
First, it's dirty diapers.
70
00:02:50,037 --> 00:02:51,872
Then it's temper tantrums.
71
00:02:51,872 --> 00:02:54,041
And then when puberty comes,
72
00:02:54,041 --> 00:02:56,410
it's "Jesus, take the wheel."
73
00:02:56,410 --> 00:02:58,479
Oh, my God, Junior hasn't even
hit puberty yet.
74
00:02:58,479 --> 00:02:59,813
You mean it's gonna get worse?
75
00:02:59,813 --> 00:03:00,981
A lot.
76
00:03:01,348 --> 00:03:04,485
Then they graduate. [sighs]
77
00:03:05,052 --> 00:03:06,920
And they move back in.
78
00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:09,323
Just when you think
you out of the woods,
79
00:03:09,323 --> 00:03:10,657
they move back in
80
00:03:10,657 --> 00:03:12,926
with their woman
and they newborn.
81
00:03:14,094 --> 00:03:15,963
I am still in the room, Dad.
82
00:03:17,297 --> 00:03:18,399
It's okay
83
00:03:18,399 --> 00:03:21,068
because the good
far outweighs the bad.
84
00:03:21,068 --> 00:03:22,302
Believe that.
85
00:03:22,302 --> 00:03:23,570
You listening, Calvin?
86
00:03:23,570 --> 00:03:25,072
Oh, yeah. I'm just trying
87
00:03:25,072 --> 00:03:27,374
to get out of this rough patch
I'm in with Junior.
88
00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:29,777
But I think I got
a game plan, though.
89
00:03:29,777 --> 00:03:30,778
What are you thinking?
90
00:03:31,278 --> 00:03:34,314
Well, Pops said I need to spend
some more quality time with him,
91
00:03:34,314 --> 00:03:36,016
so I'm taking him
to the movies after this.
92
00:03:36,016 --> 00:03:39,086
Oh, the department gets
a lot of free tickets.
93
00:03:39,086 --> 00:03:40,187
Let me get you some.
94
00:03:40,187 --> 00:03:41,188
Oh, that'll be helpful.
95
00:03:41,188 --> 00:03:42,423
[C.J.] Yeah, yeah.
96
00:03:42,423 --> 00:03:44,591
Well, I gotta go get ready.
I got a meeting.
97
00:03:44,591 --> 00:03:46,794
But I hope everything
works out, cuz.
98
00:03:46,794 --> 00:03:47,795
-Thank you.
-Mm-hmm.
99
00:03:47,795 --> 00:03:49,263
[Jazmine] Love y'all.
Bye, see ya.
100
00:03:49,263 --> 00:03:50,964
Love you, baby. Calvin.
101
00:03:51,698 --> 00:03:52,833
Hm-hmm.
102
00:03:52,833 --> 00:03:55,569
Don't take the baby
to the movies.
103
00:03:55,569 --> 00:03:56,970
Why not?
104
00:03:57,371 --> 00:03:59,506
Well, one thing
your dad and I learned
105
00:03:59,506 --> 00:04:04,478
is the most valuable time
you can spend with your children
106
00:04:05,179 --> 00:04:06,847
is time
that doesn't cost a dime.
107
00:04:07,548 --> 00:04:10,284
Now it's this big ol' puzzle
as to why
108
00:04:10,284 --> 00:04:13,220
Junior is having
the anger issues.
109
00:04:13,220 --> 00:04:15,489
Mm, I've asked him
a million times
110
00:04:15,489 --> 00:04:17,157
why he's so angry,
and he's told me
111
00:04:17,157 --> 00:04:18,992
"I don't know"
a million and one.
112
00:04:19,526 --> 00:04:21,762
That's because he doesn't
trust you yet.
113
00:04:22,429 --> 00:04:24,298
You've got to earn his trust.
114
00:04:24,298 --> 00:04:26,099
Then he will open up.
115
00:04:26,733 --> 00:04:29,837
And trust only builds
through quality time.
116
00:04:30,170 --> 00:04:32,072
Okay, so what would you suggest.
117
00:04:32,072 --> 00:04:33,507
Oh, I got the perfect thing
118
00:04:33,507 --> 00:04:36,109
that's gonna have him talking
in no time.
119
00:04:36,643 --> 00:04:39,279
-Chap, chap, chap.
-[scoffs] Okay.
120
00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:40,881
-I do.
-We'll see.
121
00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:45,118
What's happening, sizzle?
122
00:04:45,118 --> 00:04:46,320
For sizzle, all right.
123
00:04:46,320 --> 00:04:48,489
Hey, brother,
I got some great news, man.
124
00:04:48,489 --> 00:04:51,158
What, all those emails
I sent my congressman
125
00:04:51,158 --> 00:04:52,259
finally worked?
126
00:04:52,259 --> 00:04:54,495
And vegan food
is against the law?
127
00:04:54,728 --> 00:04:56,930
No, better than that, brother.
128
00:04:56,930 --> 00:04:58,632
Lookit, you know how we had
that discussion
129
00:04:58,632 --> 00:05:00,601
about how we were tired of being
130
00:05:00,601 --> 00:05:03,470
just a mediocre
local barbecue sauce brand?
131
00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:05,672
You mean the talk we have
every weekend?
132
00:05:05,672 --> 00:05:06,874
Mm-hmm.
133
00:05:06,874 --> 00:05:08,408
And then I go back to watching
the Falcon game
134
00:05:08,408 --> 00:05:10,477
and you go to sleep
on the couch?
135
00:05:10,477 --> 00:05:12,613
Drooling all over
Ella's good pillow.
136
00:05:12,613 --> 00:05:14,348
I always flip it over, don't I?
137
00:05:14,348 --> 00:05:15,883
-Thank you.
-[Floyd] But, look,
138
00:05:16,149 --> 00:05:17,618
I just made a move
139
00:05:17,618 --> 00:05:19,887
to where we can actually move
our sauce
140
00:05:19,887 --> 00:05:23,156
to be at the BBQ big leagues,
brother.
141
00:05:23,724 --> 00:05:27,327
Yeah, now, you remember Sullivan
down there at the Shop-and-Hock?
142
00:05:27,728 --> 00:05:30,330
Yeah, that's where you found
that lemon of a food truck.
143
00:05:30,964 --> 00:05:34,201
Well, his sister's best friend,
Julie,
144
00:05:34,201 --> 00:05:36,837
is the station manager down at
the local TV station.
145
00:05:37,538 --> 00:05:39,806
Floyd, I don't wanna hear
about no more cooking shows.
146
00:05:40,073 --> 00:05:41,408
Okay, I told you,
147
00:05:41,408 --> 00:05:44,011
I do not give away
my barbecue secrets for free.
148
00:05:44,011 --> 00:05:45,812
Look, hear me out.
149
00:05:45,812 --> 00:05:48,815
Let's just say we are cooking.
150
00:05:48,815 --> 00:05:52,452
And we happen to use
Wipe Me Down sauce,
151
00:05:52,819 --> 00:05:56,256
and then we just happen
to casually mention
152
00:05:56,256 --> 00:05:58,659
how amazing the sauce is.
153
00:05:59,159 --> 00:06:00,627
Okay, so we talking about a show
154
00:06:00,627 --> 00:06:02,396
-that's really a front...
-Uh-huh.
155
00:06:02,396 --> 00:06:04,398
[Curtis] For me to get
free advertisement
156
00:06:04,398 --> 00:06:07,534
to the entirety
of the United States?
157
00:06:07,534 --> 00:06:09,136
Uh, well, actually,
158
00:06:09,136 --> 00:06:11,505
it's a local access cable show.
159
00:06:11,505 --> 00:06:14,808
It's like on channel 947,000.
160
00:06:15,842 --> 00:06:18,879
Okay, so we talking about a show
that's a front
161
00:06:18,879 --> 00:06:20,581
for me to get
free advertisement...
162
00:06:20,581 --> 00:06:21,682
[Floyd] Come on.
163
00:06:21,682 --> 00:06:24,685
To the entirety
of that one parent
164
00:06:24,685 --> 00:06:26,386
of that baby little baby kid
165
00:06:26,386 --> 00:06:28,488
who keeps hitting random buttons
on the remote?
166
00:06:28,488 --> 00:06:32,793
But, brother, it is still
an excellent opportunity.
167
00:06:32,793 --> 00:06:35,495
So if we show up and show out,
168
00:06:35,495 --> 00:06:37,431
there may be a major network
169
00:06:37,431 --> 00:06:39,566
that'll pick us up, and, bam,
170
00:06:40,133 --> 00:06:43,403
Wipe Me Down goes nationwide.
171
00:06:44,037 --> 00:06:46,106
-Nationwide?
-[Floyd] Nationwide.
172
00:06:46,106 --> 00:06:47,441
Try worldwide, Floyd.
173
00:06:47,441 --> 00:06:50,110
Okay, okay, okay.
Well, why stop there?
174
00:06:50,110 --> 00:06:53,013
My sauce could end up in
the space station refrigerator.
175
00:06:53,013 --> 00:06:54,915
-You better speak it.
-You heard me?
176
00:06:54,915 --> 00:06:58,318
Wipe Me Down
to infinity and beyond!
177
00:06:58,318 --> 00:07:00,420
[Floyd] Yeah. Wow.
178
00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:01,788
You know, it's kind of funny.
179
00:07:01,788 --> 00:07:05,892
You know, you mentioned
a lot of "me" and "mine" a lot.
180
00:07:05,892 --> 00:07:09,262
You know,
it's actually our sauce.
181
00:07:09,663 --> 00:07:11,198
I'm the OG sauce boss.
182
00:07:12,099 --> 00:07:13,266
-Floyd.
-Okay.
183
00:07:13,266 --> 00:07:14,868
-I tell you what you need to do.
-What's that?
184
00:07:14,868 --> 00:07:16,737
You need to go call
that station manager.
185
00:07:16,737 --> 00:07:17,638
Okay.
186
00:07:17,638 --> 00:07:19,373
-Baby girl's warming up.
-Okay.
187
00:07:19,373 --> 00:07:20,907
We need to get it done asap.
188
00:07:20,907 --> 00:07:22,609
-So we can do it then.
-We can do it.
189
00:07:22,609 --> 00:07:24,011
[Floyd] All right.
190
00:07:26,346 --> 00:07:28,015
-Oh. Hey, Miranda.
-Hey.
191
00:07:28,015 --> 00:07:29,182
When did you get here?
192
00:07:29,182 --> 00:07:30,484
Um, C.J. texted me and said
193
00:07:30,484 --> 00:07:32,285
that the cousins
were having a playdate,
194
00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:33,620
so I brought Christian over.
195
00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:35,822
We got here
and he bum-rushed the gate,
196
00:07:35,822 --> 00:07:37,991
so [smacks lips] here I am.
197
00:07:37,991 --> 00:07:39,626
Here you are.
198
00:07:40,560 --> 00:07:42,295
So I just, you know, figured
I'd pop in
199
00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:43,764
and say hi before I left.
200
00:07:45,399 --> 00:07:46,667
Hi.
201
00:07:48,035 --> 00:07:50,804
So, um, how are you?
202
00:07:51,872 --> 00:07:54,808
I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?
203
00:07:55,175 --> 00:07:57,778
I mean, no reason.
204
00:07:58,845 --> 00:08:00,647
Are you sure you're okay?
205
00:08:01,648 --> 00:08:03,950
Yes, why, what's going on?
206
00:08:04,251 --> 00:08:09,489
Okay, so I was on social media
207
00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:11,858
and I saw that Laura
208
00:08:11,858 --> 00:08:14,594
is no longer wearing
her engagement ring.
209
00:08:15,962 --> 00:08:17,097
Damn.
210
00:08:17,097 --> 00:08:18,465
Yes, and so, what I know
211
00:08:18,465 --> 00:08:21,802
is no woman posts something
on social media by accident,
212
00:08:21,802 --> 00:08:25,806
especially when she poses
like this and this and this.
213
00:08:27,574 --> 00:08:29,242
What happened?
214
00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:32,179
Laura called off
the engagement last night.
215
00:08:32,179 --> 00:08:34,448
What? Why?
216
00:08:34,448 --> 00:08:36,283
I have no idea.
217
00:08:36,283 --> 00:08:37,951
What did she say?
218
00:08:38,418 --> 00:08:40,754
She left me a dear John letter
and she blocked my number.
219
00:08:40,754 --> 00:08:42,389
[gasp] She didn't.
220
00:08:42,389 --> 00:08:44,891
And she also blocked me
from social media too, so...
221
00:08:44,891 --> 00:08:47,494
Oh, you must've really stepped
in it this time.
222
00:08:47,828 --> 00:08:49,696
But that's the thing. I didn't.
223
00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:51,431
I have no clue what happened.
224
00:08:51,431 --> 00:08:52,699
Well, you are in luck
225
00:08:52,699 --> 00:08:55,268
because I have a PHD
in scorned women.
226
00:08:55,268 --> 00:08:58,638
So I will read it
and I will translate it for you.
227
00:08:58,638 --> 00:08:59,840
-Let me see.
-Okay, cool,
228
00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:01,842
but it's back at the condo.
229
00:09:01,842 --> 00:09:04,711
Oh, well, I can come by later
and help you
230
00:09:04,711 --> 00:09:06,713
get to the bottom of it
if you want me to.
231
00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:08,281
Miranda, thank you
for doing this for me.
232
00:09:08,281 --> 00:09:10,951
Yes, you are welcome,
but this is also for me
233
00:09:10,951 --> 00:09:12,819
because this is
entirely too juicy
234
00:09:12,819 --> 00:09:14,688
and I want all of the tea.
235
00:09:15,956 --> 00:09:17,190
Of course.
236
00:09:22,162 --> 00:09:24,631
Hey, son, you having fun
out there with your cousins?
237
00:09:24,631 --> 00:09:26,299
It's all right.
238
00:09:28,935 --> 00:09:30,904
I hope you got some magic
in that bag
239
00:09:30,904 --> 00:09:32,339
'cause he still ain't
talking to me.
240
00:09:32,339 --> 00:09:34,407
You know I don't do no magic.
241
00:09:34,674 --> 00:09:36,176
All right, son.
242
00:09:36,777 --> 00:09:41,014
The child is not allowed
to not speak to the parent.
243
00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:42,649
Where you learn that?
244
00:09:43,150 --> 00:09:45,685
I don't know, I just don't feel
like talking sometimes, Grandma.
245
00:09:45,685 --> 00:09:47,788
Well, you better get
to feeling like it.
246
00:09:48,255 --> 00:09:51,124
And what I have in this bag
is guaranteed
247
00:09:51,124 --> 00:09:53,593
to make people want to talk
to one another.
248
00:09:53,593 --> 00:09:54,995
Is it a video game?
249
00:09:54,995 --> 00:09:57,731
Oh, it's better
than a video game.
250
00:09:57,731 --> 00:09:58,999
What's better than a video game?
251
00:09:58,999 --> 00:10:01,802
Ooh, lots of things are better
than a video game,
252
00:10:01,802 --> 00:10:03,436
including this.
253
00:10:03,436 --> 00:10:04,871
What's that?
254
00:10:05,705 --> 00:10:08,909
This, my dear,
is a jigsaw puzzle.
255
00:10:09,242 --> 00:10:11,845
Oh, come on, I ain't do
no stupid puzzle.
256
00:10:12,145 --> 00:10:13,780
Aw.
257
00:10:17,325 --> 00:10:19,127
Uh-uh, let him do it.
258
00:10:19,394 --> 00:10:20,962
Take the puzzle out.
259
00:10:20,962 --> 00:10:22,664
There's no picture on the box.
260
00:10:22,664 --> 00:10:25,033
That's the mystery of it.
261
00:10:25,033 --> 00:10:26,368
How are you supposed
to put it together
262
00:10:26,368 --> 00:10:28,837
when you don't know what
it's supposed to look like?
263
00:10:28,837 --> 00:10:32,040
The mystery. The mystery
is part of the fun.
264
00:10:32,541 --> 00:10:34,609
Here, let's start
with these edge pieces.
265
00:10:34,609 --> 00:10:35,844
[Ella] Oh, that's right.
266
00:10:35,844 --> 00:10:38,313
Now, it's too hard
to solve a puzzle
267
00:10:38,313 --> 00:10:40,916
and solve a mystery by starting
at the heart of it.
268
00:10:40,916 --> 00:10:43,552
The best way
is to start with the edges.
269
00:10:43,552 --> 00:10:44,853
And then, with patience,
270
00:10:44,853 --> 00:10:46,488
you work your way to the middle,
271
00:10:46,488 --> 00:10:47,889
and then, before you know it,
272
00:10:47,889 --> 00:10:50,058
the big picture comes together.
273
00:10:50,292 --> 00:10:51,760
This is so boring.
274
00:10:52,761 --> 00:10:54,229
Is that one
of Aunty Ella's puzzles?
275
00:10:54,229 --> 00:10:55,731
-Yes.
-Boring.
276
00:10:55,731 --> 00:10:57,232
-See?
-Jazmine.
277
00:10:57,232 --> 00:10:59,434
You know, you have
the worst timing sometimes.
278
00:10:59,801 --> 00:11:01,336
Oh, my bad.
279
00:11:02,437 --> 00:11:04,473
Don't listen to Jazmine.
280
00:11:04,473 --> 00:11:06,041
Puzzles are fun.
281
00:11:06,041 --> 00:11:07,342
For who?
282
00:11:08,710 --> 00:11:11,413
Junior, this is an activity
283
00:11:11,413 --> 00:11:13,849
that gives us space to talk,
284
00:11:14,149 --> 00:11:15,751
tell stories.
285
00:11:15,751 --> 00:11:17,953
Me and your dad, and Jazmine,
286
00:11:17,953 --> 00:11:20,355
used to do puzzles all the time.
287
00:11:20,622 --> 00:11:21,923
Oh, yeah, Junior,
288
00:11:21,923 --> 00:11:24,326
puzzles are
a good ol' giggety time.
289
00:11:24,793 --> 00:11:27,429
Junior, used to do puzzles
every Sunday after church.
290
00:11:27,429 --> 00:11:28,964
Too bad for you.
291
00:11:31,166 --> 00:11:35,403
Oh, Calvin, do you remember
when Sister Gladys asked you,
292
00:11:35,403 --> 00:11:38,073
"Do you pray before dinner?"
293
00:11:39,040 --> 00:11:41,943
Pops laughed so hard he snorted
his sweet tea out his nose.
294
00:11:41,943 --> 00:11:43,645
Oh, wait, this story
actually is funny.
295
00:11:43,645 --> 00:11:45,013
[Junior] What'd he say?
296
00:11:45,013 --> 00:11:47,082
Well, Sister Gladys asked,
she was like,
297
00:11:47,082 --> 00:11:49,518
"Do you, uh, do you pray
before your dinner?"
298
00:11:49,518 --> 00:11:52,120
I said, "I don't have to because
my momma is a good cook."
299
00:11:53,855 --> 00:11:55,824
-And that's true, right?
-[Junior] Mm-hmm.
300
00:11:57,559 --> 00:12:00,095
Hello out there in TV land.
301
00:12:00,362 --> 00:12:02,697
And welcome to my show,
302
00:12:02,697 --> 00:12:04,800
What's Cookin' With Floyd.
303
00:12:05,267 --> 00:12:06,701
Uh. [clears throat]
304
00:12:06,701 --> 00:12:08,436
What, you forgot somebody?
305
00:12:09,604 --> 00:12:10,906
Where's my name?
306
00:12:11,540 --> 00:12:13,108
I'm Floyd.
307
00:12:13,108 --> 00:12:15,544
Aka the one who set this up.
308
00:12:16,044 --> 00:12:19,014
Okay, I see you.
I see you, Floyd.
309
00:12:19,014 --> 00:12:22,684
All right, so, uh, this is
my co-host, Curtis.
310
00:12:22,684 --> 00:12:24,953
Aka the cook.
311
00:12:25,854 --> 00:12:28,023
So what are we cooking today,
Curtis?
312
00:12:28,023 --> 00:12:31,560
Well, today, Floyd,
we ain't cooking jack.
313
00:12:32,160 --> 00:12:35,897
Curtis is cooking
a big juicy slab
314
00:12:35,897 --> 00:12:37,299
of pork ribs.
315
00:12:37,299 --> 00:12:39,000
Follow me.
316
00:12:40,435 --> 00:12:42,070
It's time to season the meat.
317
00:12:42,771 --> 00:12:43,705
[Floyd] All right.
318
00:12:43,705 --> 00:12:44,739
Okay.
319
00:12:45,273 --> 00:12:47,175
What are we seasoning it
with today?
320
00:12:48,476 --> 00:12:50,478
Well, today, Floyd,
321
00:12:50,478 --> 00:12:53,281
we ain't seasoning nothing.
322
00:12:53,815 --> 00:12:55,817
Curtis will be seasoning
323
00:12:56,284 --> 00:13:01,256
with his sweet and tangy
barbecue Wipe Me Down sauce.
324
00:13:02,424 --> 00:13:04,492
[indistinct bickering]
325
00:13:04,492 --> 00:13:06,962
I got this. You do that.
326
00:13:08,597 --> 00:13:12,601
The Wipe Me Down sauce
goes right on the meat, y'all.
327
00:13:12,601 --> 00:13:14,536
-Okay.
-Sweet and tangy sauce
328
00:13:14,536 --> 00:13:17,339
and you can't be shy with it.
329
00:13:17,339 --> 00:13:18,907
Don't be shy.
330
00:13:18,907 --> 00:13:20,876
'Cause it's like the song said,
331
00:13:20,876 --> 00:13:23,879
"Never too much, never too much,
never too much."
332
00:13:23,879 --> 00:13:27,382
And that's too, too, too much!
333
00:13:27,382 --> 00:13:29,217
Right. Inventory.
334
00:13:30,051 --> 00:13:32,320
Uh, hello, everybody out there
in TV land.
335
00:13:32,687 --> 00:13:34,456
I just wanted you to know
336
00:13:35,390 --> 00:13:37,359
that I, alone, by myself,
337
00:13:37,859 --> 00:13:41,062
created Wipe Me Down
barbecue sauce.
338
00:13:41,062 --> 00:13:42,964
Didn't had no help.
339
00:13:42,964 --> 00:13:44,966
I created it
from a family recipe
340
00:13:44,966 --> 00:13:46,701
and I tweaked it all myself.
341
00:13:46,701 --> 00:13:47,936
Put a little, I prayed over it.
342
00:13:47,936 --> 00:13:50,171
-Is that right?
-And I made it work.
343
00:13:51,006 --> 00:13:54,109
In fact, just a little trivia
for you:
344
00:13:55,343 --> 00:13:58,013
he didn't even come on board
till after the fact,
345
00:13:58,680 --> 00:14:00,649
okay, to ride on my coattail.
346
00:14:00,649 --> 00:14:02,417
-Ride on your coattails?
-Yes.
347
00:14:02,417 --> 00:14:03,485
Bruh, I took this
348
00:14:03,485 --> 00:14:06,955
little raggedy, flea market-type
condiment
349
00:14:06,955 --> 00:14:09,190
which is nothing
but ol' bootleg ketchup
350
00:14:09,190 --> 00:14:13,128
and made it a cuisine condiment.
351
00:14:13,762 --> 00:14:15,864
-"Bootleg condiment"?
-Yes, bootleg.
352
00:14:16,164 --> 00:14:17,599
Then what is
a bootleg condiment,
353
00:14:17,599 --> 00:14:18,767
I got your bootleg condiment...
354
00:14:18,767 --> 00:14:20,135
Wait a minute...
[chuckles nervously]
355
00:14:20,135 --> 00:14:21,803
I got your condiment
in your bootleg.
356
00:14:21,803 --> 00:14:23,805
Hold on, hold... Ms. Julie.
357
00:14:23,805 --> 00:14:26,474
Ms. Julie? Ms. Julie?
358
00:14:27,842 --> 00:14:29,577
Damn. She hung up.
359
00:14:30,478 --> 00:14:31,646
So what that mean?
360
00:14:31,646 --> 00:14:32,847
That means you messed up.
361
00:14:32,847 --> 00:14:34,749
Like goodbye, cooking show,
362
00:14:34,749 --> 00:14:37,752
to hello, mediocrity,
our old friend.
363
00:14:37,752 --> 00:14:39,921
What, I messed up? What you
talking about I messed up?
364
00:14:39,921 --> 00:14:41,990
You the one got your name
all over the show
365
00:14:41,990 --> 00:14:43,591
like some egomaniac.
366
00:14:43,591 --> 00:14:46,895
Look, I, you don't never
give me no credit, Curtis.
367
00:14:46,895 --> 00:14:48,463
I just thought
this was an opportunity
368
00:14:48,463 --> 00:14:50,899
for me to finally get
my chance to shine.
369
00:14:50,899 --> 00:14:52,200
That's all.
370
00:14:52,200 --> 00:14:53,935
Floyd, what the hell
you want me to do?
371
00:14:53,935 --> 00:14:55,603
Put your face on the bottle?
372
00:14:55,603 --> 00:14:56,838
Would you do that?
373
00:14:56,838 --> 00:14:58,373
Hell, no.
374
00:14:58,940 --> 00:15:00,508
But what I will do,
375
00:15:01,276 --> 00:15:04,879
I will say I really appreciate
your hard work.
376
00:15:07,048 --> 00:15:11,219
And being a vital member
of the Wipe Me Down family.
377
00:15:13,154 --> 00:15:14,823
And I appreciate that.
378
00:15:15,156 --> 00:15:17,559
Big homie, thank you
for everything you do.
379
00:15:17,559 --> 00:15:19,828
Yes, business partner. Yes.
380
00:15:20,495 --> 00:15:22,998
Uh, look, um,
so you know what that means.
381
00:15:22,998 --> 00:15:25,033
It means that we're
equal partners, right?
382
00:15:25,500 --> 00:15:28,303
-We're equal partners, Floyd.
-Thank you.
383
00:15:28,303 --> 00:15:30,171
Come on, brother,
don't you know, man,
384
00:15:30,171 --> 00:15:31,473
this business
would've never gotten
385
00:15:31,473 --> 00:15:34,275
as far as it's gotten
without your expertise.
386
00:15:34,275 --> 00:15:35,410
Okay.
387
00:15:35,410 --> 00:15:37,679
And we damn sure can't go
where we're headed
388
00:15:37,679 --> 00:15:39,080
without you.
389
00:15:40,448 --> 00:15:41,983
Let's just go inside
390
00:15:41,983 --> 00:15:44,152
and let's get
a step-by-step plan
391
00:15:44,152 --> 00:15:46,087
so we can take this sauce
392
00:15:46,087 --> 00:15:48,423
to the top of the sauce world.
393
00:15:48,423 --> 00:15:50,458
-We can do that. I like that.
-Mm-hmm. Can we do that?
394
00:15:50,458 --> 00:15:51,326
I like that idea, Floyd.
395
00:15:51,326 --> 00:15:52,460
[Floyd] All right, all right.
396
00:15:52,460 --> 00:15:53,461
Hey, well, you do know
397
00:15:53,461 --> 00:15:54,996
the Falcon game
is about to start?
398
00:15:54,996 --> 00:15:56,197
Yeah, I know,
399
00:15:56,197 --> 00:15:57,532
but I'm real serious
about this plan, though.
400
00:15:57,532 --> 00:15:59,200
-I am too. I am too.
-Okay, well, good then. Okay.
401
00:15:59,200 --> 00:16:00,435
I'm serious. But look here,
402
00:16:00,435 --> 00:16:02,670
just while you coming up
with this great plan...
403
00:16:02,670 --> 00:16:03,938
Uh-huh?
404
00:16:03,938 --> 00:16:06,608
Please put a napkin
on Ella's pillow.
405
00:16:07,008 --> 00:16:08,343
Just in case.
406
00:16:08,610 --> 00:16:10,378
Okay, I cannot believe
407
00:16:10,378 --> 00:16:12,614
that Laura called off
the engagement.
408
00:16:12,614 --> 00:16:13,648
Let me see this letter.
409
00:16:13,648 --> 00:16:15,083
See if you can make
some sense of it.
410
00:16:15,083 --> 00:16:16,384
All right, here we go.
411
00:16:16,384 --> 00:16:19,854
"Calvin, you are not ready
for someone like me.
412
00:16:19,854 --> 00:16:22,991
I'm calling off
our impending marriage.
413
00:16:22,991 --> 00:16:24,826
You need to figure out
if you want Mir..."
414
00:16:24,826 --> 00:16:27,128
Miranda? Wait, how did I
end up in this?
415
00:16:27,128 --> 00:16:29,697
I mean, we have a kid.
We were married once, but...
416
00:16:29,697 --> 00:16:31,366
You're preaching to the choir.
417
00:16:33,401 --> 00:16:35,737
"You need to figure out
if you want Miranda
418
00:16:35,737 --> 00:16:39,774
or Destiny or whoever else
you've been hiding."?
419
00:16:39,774 --> 00:16:41,876
Okay, Calvin, hold on.
420
00:16:41,876 --> 00:16:43,511
Who is Destiny?
421
00:16:43,511 --> 00:16:44,813
Don't ask me.
422
00:16:44,813 --> 00:16:47,749
Well, if I knew Destiny,
I would ask her, but I don't.
423
00:16:48,383 --> 00:16:50,251
Are you cheating on Laura?
424
00:16:50,251 --> 00:16:52,720
No, I don't know any Destiny.
425
00:16:52,720 --> 00:16:56,224
Okay, so we can't ask Laura
426
00:16:56,224 --> 00:16:59,294
because she's not talking to you
and she's blocked you.
427
00:16:59,294 --> 00:17:02,297
And I can't ask her
because, if I ask her,
428
00:17:02,297 --> 00:17:03,832
then she's gonna know
that we talked
429
00:17:03,832 --> 00:17:06,000
and then she's gonna feel
some kind of way about that too.
430
00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:07,735
That she definitely will.
431
00:17:07,735 --> 00:17:09,270
[Miranda] [sighing] Okay.
432
00:17:09,804 --> 00:17:12,140
So, you know what? Maybe this is
what we're gonna do.
433
00:17:12,140 --> 00:17:13,708
Let's look on her social media
434
00:17:13,708 --> 00:17:14,976
and see if there are any clues.
435
00:17:14,976 --> 00:17:16,211
Okay, come on, let's look.
436
00:17:16,211 --> 00:17:17,312
Well, I'm blocked.
437
00:17:17,312 --> 00:17:19,280
All right, let me see.
[exhales loudly]
438
00:17:20,648 --> 00:17:22,150
Wait a minute.
439
00:17:23,852 --> 00:17:25,253
She blocked me too.
440
00:17:25,253 --> 00:17:27,555
Damn. This is a big ol' mess.
441
00:17:27,922 --> 00:17:29,491
I mean, she's literally
erasing me
442
00:17:29,491 --> 00:17:31,893
and anybody associated with me
out of her life.
443
00:17:31,893 --> 00:17:33,795
Okay, listen.
Listen, listen, listen.
444
00:17:33,795 --> 00:17:35,130
Have no fear.
445
00:17:35,130 --> 00:17:37,599
Detective Miranda is here.
446
00:17:37,599 --> 00:17:39,400
You know, every girl has
a dummy account
447
00:17:39,400 --> 00:17:41,202
to do
a little Internet stalking.
448
00:17:41,603 --> 00:17:44,939
Wait, did you use
a dummy account to stalk me?
449
00:17:44,939 --> 00:17:46,274
No comment.
450
00:17:47,542 --> 00:17:49,210
Um, so, listen,
451
00:17:49,210 --> 00:17:51,746
I'm gonna need your laptop
because it's just too much.
452
00:17:51,746 --> 00:17:53,448
I don't wanna have to logout
of my real account,
453
00:17:53,448 --> 00:17:54,949
then have to login
to the dummy account,
454
00:17:54,949 --> 00:17:56,317
then log back
into the real account.
455
00:17:56,317 --> 00:17:57,552
It's just entirely too much.
456
00:17:57,552 --> 00:17:58,920
So let me see
your computer, okay?
457
00:17:58,920 --> 00:18:02,357
Okay, uh, I haven't been on it
since Friday, but, uh...
458
00:18:03,858 --> 00:18:05,393
Here. There you go.
459
00:18:05,393 --> 00:18:08,129
Whoo. Oh, look at you.
I'm so proud of you.
460
00:18:08,129 --> 00:18:11,065
You got your little password
taped right here.
461
00:18:11,065 --> 00:18:12,500
I'm loving
all this transparency.
462
00:18:12,500 --> 00:18:14,169
I told you,
I got nothing to hide.
463
00:18:14,169 --> 00:18:15,637
[Miranda] Mm-hmm.
464
00:18:18,006 --> 00:18:20,041
You absolutely have
something to hide.
465
00:18:20,041 --> 00:18:22,677
"Ecstasy is your destiny"?
Really?
466
00:18:23,044 --> 00:18:25,113
You're on this
little hookup site,
467
00:18:25,113 --> 00:18:26,781
hooking up
with the Internet thots.
468
00:18:26,781 --> 00:18:28,783
No, I've never been on the...
469
00:18:28,783 --> 00:18:30,385
You're on the site, Calvin.
470
00:18:30,385 --> 00:18:32,053
-Oh, damn.
-[Miranda] What?
471
00:18:32,053 --> 00:18:33,621
Son of a...
472
00:18:35,690 --> 00:18:36,824
Hold on.
473
00:18:38,693 --> 00:18:39,894
Peanut.
474
00:18:39,894 --> 00:18:41,362
Hey, what was the name
of that dating site chick
475
00:18:41,362 --> 00:18:43,097
that you hooked up with
last night?
476
00:18:45,166 --> 00:18:47,702
Destiny with the apple booty.
Yeah. That's it.
477
00:18:48,970 --> 00:18:50,238
Wait, let me speak.
478
00:18:50,238 --> 00:18:52,207
Do you still have
that see-through app
479
00:18:52,207 --> 00:18:53,741
that records from your doorbell?
480
00:18:53,741 --> 00:18:54,809
What?
481
00:18:55,944 --> 00:18:57,445
You already watched it 10 times
482
00:18:57,445 --> 00:18:59,614
'cause you and Destiny did
your thang on that Dang?
483
00:18:59,614 --> 00:19:00,615
Okay, wait, no.
484
00:19:00,615 --> 00:19:02,083
Stop, stop, stop.
485
00:19:02,083 --> 00:19:03,718
Please, spare me the details.
486
00:19:03,718 --> 00:19:05,220
But I need that footage.
487
00:19:05,954 --> 00:19:07,522
No, not for me, fool.
488
00:19:07,522 --> 00:19:08,790
I don't get down like that.
489
00:19:09,290 --> 00:19:10,992
Look, look, please,
shoot me that footage
490
00:19:10,992 --> 00:19:13,561
and also take some screenshots
of your texts with Destiny.
491
00:19:13,561 --> 00:19:15,930
Look, I'll explain
everything later.
492
00:19:15,930 --> 00:19:18,666
Peanut, please don't forget.
This is life or death for me.
493
00:19:18,666 --> 00:19:21,536
Okay, thank you.
I appreciate it. Be breezy.
494
00:19:22,737 --> 00:19:24,539
Life or death? Really?
495
00:19:24,806 --> 00:19:26,507
Yes, Miranda. Really.
496
00:19:26,507 --> 00:19:29,143
My relationship with Laura
is life or death for me.
497
00:19:29,811 --> 00:19:32,046
[sighs] Okay.
498
00:19:32,447 --> 00:19:34,482
So even if you get the proof,
499
00:19:34,482 --> 00:19:36,584
how exactly are you
gonna get it to her?
500
00:19:36,584 --> 00:19:38,386
'Cause she's not talking to you.
501
00:19:38,386 --> 00:19:39,554
Well, I don't know,
502
00:19:39,554 --> 00:19:41,155
but at least I know
what the problem is.
503
00:19:41,155 --> 00:19:43,191
Now I can fix it
and get my girl back.
504
00:19:43,691 --> 00:19:46,227
Look, Miranda, thank you
for always having my back.
505
00:19:46,728 --> 00:19:47,795
Always.
506
00:19:52,275 --> 00:19:54,444
-Hey, Junior.
-[Junior] Yeah?
507
00:19:54,444 --> 00:19:55,879
Thanks for rolling
with your pops
508
00:19:55,879 --> 00:19:56,946
to the hardware store.
509
00:19:57,414 --> 00:19:58,848
You think, tomorrow, you wanna
roll with me
510
00:19:58,848 --> 00:20:00,183
to get my car washed?
511
00:20:00,183 --> 00:20:01,885
Well, I have to go back
to Mom's tomorrow.
512
00:20:01,885 --> 00:20:04,754
Oh, yeah, well, I'll call her
to make sure it's okay
513
00:20:04,754 --> 00:20:07,090
that I pick you up
and then drop you off after.
514
00:20:07,090 --> 00:20:08,925
-Shouldn't take that long.
-Okay.
515
00:20:09,993 --> 00:20:11,761
Cool. [door knocking]
516
00:20:12,062 --> 00:20:13,430
What the hell?
517
00:20:16,333 --> 00:20:18,501
[Junior] A present?
Is it for me?
518
00:20:19,502 --> 00:20:21,171
It says it's for the both of us.
519
00:20:21,171 --> 00:20:22,772
Here, come help me open it.
520
00:20:34,317 --> 00:20:36,920
[Junior] Oh, it's the puzzle
we did today.
521
00:20:36,920 --> 00:20:38,388
[Calvin] Mm.
522
00:20:39,889 --> 00:20:41,524
[Junior] It's nice.
523
00:20:43,326 --> 00:20:45,061
[Ella] Piece by piece,
524
00:20:45,061 --> 00:20:47,330
the puzzle comes together.
525
00:20:47,330 --> 00:20:49,199
Love Grandma.
526
00:20:50,233 --> 00:20:51,701
Sick.
527
00:20:55,931 --> 00:20:58,967
[music]
528
00:21:25,027 --> 00:21:26,495
[music]
529
00:21:27,129 --> 00:21:28,931
[music]