1 00:01:15,033 --> 00:01:19,662 Do you know how hard I've prayed? Why does he make me suffer? 2 00:01:20,831 --> 00:01:24,542 - God will give you a child. - Let me see her. 3 00:01:38,182 --> 00:01:42,351 - So you killed another one. - 'Cause you had nothing to do with this. 4 00:01:42,603 --> 00:01:44,771 Maybe you ought to stay off her once in a while. 5 00:01:44,855 --> 00:01:46,606 Get out, you witch! 6 00:01:52,821 --> 00:01:55,573 I've got 85, and my boots are off. 7 00:01:56,658 --> 00:01:58,409 You don't have a sheath. 8 00:01:58,535 --> 00:02:03,915 I'll get one, but that'll be another quarter, and this is all I have. 9 00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:08,753 Go wash yourself. 10 00:02:13,967 --> 00:02:18,638 You get me in trouble and I'm gonna cut your dick off and boil it in hog fat. 11 00:02:19,890 --> 00:02:22,099 I'm gonna cut his dick off... 12 00:02:24,728 --> 00:02:27,939 I'm gonna cut his dick off and boil it in hog fat. 13 00:02:28,774 --> 00:02:30,817 What was that, sweetheart? 14 00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:33,236 I'm cold. 15 00:02:40,285 --> 00:02:42,245 Do you want to hold him? 16 00:02:42,871 --> 00:02:46,415 I'm gonna cut his dick off and boil it in hog fat. 17 00:03:06,395 --> 00:03:11,816 - It's midnight. What do you want? - I told you God would give you a child. 18 00:03:16,238 --> 00:03:17,613 Whose is it? 19 00:03:19,449 --> 00:03:21,242 Is your husband home? 20 00:03:25,873 --> 00:03:27,915 God is giving you a child. 21 00:03:31,837 --> 00:03:36,465 His name is Dick, after a wish his mother should've lived to see. 22 00:04:18,967 --> 00:04:20,718 Come on. Drink this. 23 00:04:23,221 --> 00:04:26,682 You know, there's no point in both of us not sleeping. 24 00:04:30,145 --> 00:04:34,440 - She wakes up at night when I drop off. - You so sure it's a girl? 25 00:04:35,067 --> 00:04:37,902 Well, believe me, she knows what she wants. 26 00:04:41,531 --> 00:04:43,324 I packed your valise. 27 00:04:45,285 --> 00:04:48,162 - I could have done that. - Well, you'll get a chance. 28 00:04:48,246 --> 00:04:50,039 The clasp is broken. 29 00:04:51,166 --> 00:04:54,377 Carla said she saw Sally hitting it with a hammer. 30 00:04:54,878 --> 00:04:58,047 She's taken to your tools like a little lesbian. 31 00:05:14,773 --> 00:05:17,066 Am I ever going to sleep again? 32 00:05:18,694 --> 00:05:20,903 At least you don't look tired. 33 00:05:21,738 --> 00:05:24,365 I just want everything to be perfect. 34 00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:28,285 I want her to come into our home at its best. 35 00:05:31,248 --> 00:05:32,873 Close your eyes. 36 00:05:39,589 --> 00:05:43,884 - You're on a warm, sandy beach... - Because I'm a whale. 37 00:05:47,264 --> 00:05:50,599 You're on a warm, sandy beach. 38 00:05:52,936 --> 00:05:55,855 You can smell the faint scent of coconut oil. 39 00:05:58,608 --> 00:06:00,735 And as you slide your hands 40 00:06:01,778 --> 00:06:06,282 through that cold patch of sand underneath the shadow of your deck chair... 41 00:06:06,366 --> 00:06:08,117 You're good at this. 44 00:06:28,305 --> 00:06:30,222 Yes, but on occasion, 45 00:06:30,307 --> 00:06:33,392 you have to resign yourself to sleeping where you are. 46 00:06:33,477 --> 00:06:36,312 That's why they sell subway tokens, silly. 47 00:06:38,231 --> 00:06:39,315 Lola. 48 00:06:40,567 --> 00:06:44,653 - You're looking lovely today. - Thank you. Are you here to see me? 49 00:06:45,280 --> 00:06:49,492 No, I'm just verifying some information. Thank you, Lola. 50 00:06:54,664 --> 00:06:58,209 He just always stops by concerning the strangest things. 51 00:06:58,627 --> 00:07:01,921 - Yesterday it was my engagement ring. - Enough, Lola. 52 00:07:02,214 --> 00:07:04,757 You know there's something about the way he talks. 53 00:07:04,841 --> 00:07:07,218 I could listen to him read the phonebook. 54 00:07:07,302 --> 00:07:11,430 Well, when he gets to "S," I need Howard Sullivan at Lever Brothers. 55 00:07:16,895 --> 00:07:18,270 Remarkable. 56 00:07:19,356 --> 00:07:23,317 I picked it for its sensuality, but it also, in some way, 57 00:07:23,777 --> 00:07:26,278 reminds me of our business. 58 00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:31,742 Who is the man who imagined her ecstasy? 59 00:07:33,203 --> 00:07:34,578 Who indeed? 60 00:07:37,707 --> 00:07:42,545 - We were just talking about you. - Burt's on his way. Where's Roger? 61 00:07:43,088 --> 00:07:46,715 Probably taking another Grecian treasure out of its crate. 62 00:07:47,217 --> 00:07:50,219 I apologize for Baltimore. It has to be done. 63 00:07:50,512 --> 00:07:52,721 It's a sales call. Isn't there more I can do here? 64 00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:56,267 It's not a sales call. You're the face of our business. 65 00:07:57,227 --> 00:07:59,728 They need someone they can trust. 66 00:08:00,730 --> 00:08:04,108 London Fog. How ludicrous. 67 00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:07,528 - Really? I have one. - So do I. 68 00:08:07,737 --> 00:08:10,406 No, of course. It's just the name. 69 00:08:11,241 --> 00:08:14,535 There is no fog in London. There is no London fog. 70 00:08:15,370 --> 00:08:18,789 - Are you sure about that? - Quite. Never was. 71 00:08:19,374 --> 00:08:23,919 It was the coal dust from the industrial era. Charles Dickens and whatnot. 72 00:08:24,504 --> 00:08:27,423 Mr. Cooper, Mr. Peterson is here to see you. 73 00:08:30,552 --> 00:08:34,221 - Come on in, Burt. - Hey, Don. Bert, Lane. 74 00:08:35,599 --> 00:08:39,643 - We need you to have a seat, Burt. - Okay. 75 00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:45,858 You got a blindfold, too? 76 00:08:49,446 --> 00:08:51,071 This isn't easy. 77 00:08:53,074 --> 00:08:56,452 - It really isn't. - Oh, God. 78 00:08:58,371 --> 00:09:00,581 I really thought I'd made it. 79 00:09:00,999 --> 00:09:04,293 I know it's unkind, but it's generous and it's fair. 80 00:09:07,631 --> 00:09:10,549 - Well, why the hell did you wait so long? - It was brought to our attention 81 00:09:10,634 --> 00:09:14,929 that your wife was undergoing radiation. We thought it decent to wait. 82 00:09:16,097 --> 00:09:17,681 That was decent. 83 00:09:18,975 --> 00:09:21,518 Sorry I'm late. Did I miss anything? 84 00:09:25,148 --> 00:09:28,859 Sad meeting. Sorry about that. 85 00:09:31,655 --> 00:09:33,113 It wasn't easy. 86 00:09:33,198 --> 00:09:36,492 - We'll see how you do without my Rolodex. - We're going to take that risk. 87 00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:40,120 You make me sick. You're the dying empire. 88 00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:43,040 - We're the future. - Burt, control yourself. 89 00:09:43,124 --> 00:09:48,462 - No, I'm the head of accounts, damn it! - I'm sure we'll regret it. I'm serious. 90 00:09:51,508 --> 00:09:53,968 See you on the breadlines, fellas. 91 00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:01,016 Is that the last of it? 92 00:10:01,101 --> 00:10:02,935 Because I don't like how much I'm getting used to these. 93 00:10:03,019 --> 00:10:05,604 I don't know anything you don't know. 94 00:10:07,941 --> 00:10:10,567 You understand there's no point ever in making over $40,000 95 00:10:10,652 --> 00:10:13,737 when you'll be taxed 69%? You're working for them. 96 00:10:13,822 --> 00:10:16,907 And God forbid you really make it. Everything over 70 grand is 81%. 97 00:10:16,992 --> 00:10:20,077 - Even if you're married? - Fellow comrades in mediocrity, 98 00:10:20,161 --> 00:10:24,790 I want you to listen very carefully. You can all go straight to hell. 99 00:10:35,719 --> 00:10:38,429 I heard he's going in-house at Nabisco. 100 00:10:39,597 --> 00:10:42,266 - You're sure it's not starting again? - Mr. Campbell's office. 101 00:10:42,350 --> 00:10:43,642 - What? - I'll let him know. 102 00:10:43,727 --> 00:10:47,229 - The firings. - Mr. Campbell, Mr. Pryce wants to see you. 103 00:10:48,898 --> 00:10:51,900 - I'm at lunch. - I'll bring you a doggy bag. 104 00:10:55,822 --> 00:10:57,156 Holy crap. 105 00:10:58,950 --> 00:11:01,702 You couldn't have pulled me aside to say that? 106 00:11:01,786 --> 00:11:03,203 I'm sure it's nothing. 107 00:11:03,288 --> 00:11:06,248 How the hell am I supposed to live like this? 108 00:11:08,001 --> 00:11:10,210 Drop dead, you limey vulture! 109 00:11:12,797 --> 00:11:14,340 Son of a bitch! 110 00:11:16,634 --> 00:11:18,927 I assume you can continue to handle this beautifully 111 00:11:19,012 --> 00:11:21,930 while I dispense psychotherapy to the girls in the pool. 112 00:11:22,015 --> 00:11:24,600 You Americans don't know how to handle your emotions. 113 00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:26,143 It's unbecoming. 114 00:11:26,227 --> 00:11:30,314 His wife is sick. And if you had talked to his girl, she would've informed him. 115 00:11:30,398 --> 00:11:33,192 So he would've had a longer walk to Mr. Cooper's? 116 00:11:33,276 --> 00:11:34,693 And if you had talked to me, 117 00:11:34,778 --> 00:11:37,696 I would have been waiting with his coat and his Rolodex. 118 00:11:37,781 --> 00:11:39,573 While we're on the topic of decorum, 119 00:11:39,657 --> 00:11:42,659 I'd like to speak with you about the way I'm being addressed. 120 00:11:42,744 --> 00:11:44,370 Could you be more specific? 121 00:11:44,454 --> 00:11:48,207 The switchboard. I'm not John. I'm Mr. Hooker. 122 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:52,211 That's the way they've been taught to address the secretaries. 123 00:11:52,295 --> 00:11:55,798 Yes, well, as I've explained, in Great Britain... 124 00:11:55,882 --> 00:12:00,135 A truck is a lorry and an elevator is a lift. I've got it, Mr. Hooker. 125 00:12:00,470 --> 00:12:03,430 Despite your title, you are not a secretary. 126 00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:08,310 - I'm Mr. Pryce's right arm. I'm not his typist. - Of course. 127 00:12:08,436 --> 00:12:10,896 Good luck, everybody. Good luck! 128 00:12:11,648 --> 00:12:15,984 I assume you will let him know when Mr. Peterson has left the building. 129 00:12:23,660 --> 00:12:26,412 - How are we today? - Very well, thank you. 130 00:12:27,956 --> 00:12:31,667 - Burt Peterson's left the agency. - Really? 131 00:12:32,335 --> 00:12:38,715 Yes. I can't speak for everyone here, but I like you. 132 00:12:40,135 --> 00:12:44,304 - And I like you. - But you don't know me. 133 00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:47,683 But I will make that effort, if given the opportunity. 134 00:12:47,767 --> 00:12:48,976 Pardon? 135 00:12:50,520 --> 00:12:53,856 I apologize that I haven't been more welcoming, socially. 136 00:12:53,940 --> 00:12:56,483 It seemed until your wife arrives... 137 00:12:57,652 --> 00:13:00,863 I didn't want to make it awkward with a threesome. 138 00:13:01,156 --> 00:13:02,948 Although, now that I think of it, perhaps your being alone 139 00:13:03,032 --> 00:13:05,242 is all the more reason I should've offered my hospitality. 140 00:13:05,326 --> 00:13:07,786 - Do have a seat. - Why? 141 00:13:08,955 --> 00:13:10,706 Is something wrong? 142 00:13:11,207 --> 00:13:13,292 I don't know. You just removed the head of my department, 143 00:13:13,376 --> 00:13:15,711 and now you're offering me a chair. 144 00:13:15,795 --> 00:13:20,591 How cruel of me. I wanted to inform you that you're now head of accounts. 145 00:13:23,553 --> 00:13:26,722 - Excuse me? - It seemed like the right thing to do, 146 00:13:26,973 --> 00:13:29,391 despite your lack of hospitality. 147 00:13:30,894 --> 00:13:34,104 The specifics are pending, as is the announcement. 148 00:13:35,231 --> 00:13:38,650 Is this really happening? I need to know it's certain. 149 00:13:40,278 --> 00:13:41,695 Yes, but... 150 00:13:47,118 --> 00:13:50,496 - Wonderful. Thank you. - Splendid. 151 00:14:00,048 --> 00:14:04,593 - Well, it turns out things are splendid. - That's good. 152 00:14:04,886 --> 00:14:07,429 Could you get my wife on the phone? 153 00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:27,908 ! have Mrs. Campbell for you. 154 00:14:30,620 --> 00:14:33,539 - How are you, sweetheart? - What are you doing? 155 00:14:33,790 --> 00:14:36,833 I know I told you this morning. I'm having luncheon, 156 00:14:36,918 --> 00:14:39,002 with the Docents' committee from the Met. 157 00:14:39,087 --> 00:14:41,713 - How are they? - Since when do you care? 158 00:14:41,965 --> 00:14:44,925 Since I was made head of accounts. 159 00:14:45,134 --> 00:14:46,635 - No! - Yes. 160 00:14:46,844 --> 00:14:50,472 Oh, my goodness! Peter, that's wonderful! 161 00:14:50,932 --> 00:14:54,351 It really is. I knew it would happen one day for real. 162 00:14:54,852 --> 00:14:58,564 - I love the sound of your voice right now. - That's because I'm already drunk. 163 00:14:58,648 --> 00:15:03,110 Good for you. Just one more minute. My husband got some good news. 164 00:15:04,654 --> 00:15:07,614 - Make a reservation. Surprise me. - Okay. 165 00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:12,369 - I should call my mother. - Peter. 166 00:15:13,788 --> 00:15:16,290 Don't go to the well. There's no water there. 167 00:15:18,001 --> 00:15:21,420 I don't even know if I'm getting a raise. I didn't ask. I forgot. 168 00:15:21,504 --> 00:15:25,465 That's very noble. You see? One doesn't need money to be fulfilled. 169 00:15:25,550 --> 00:15:28,677 Don't let those ladies from the Met hear you say that. 170 00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:31,597 - I should go. - Bye. 171 00:15:37,437 --> 00:15:39,354 Sorry to interrupt your lunch. 172 00:15:39,439 --> 00:15:42,858 I heard you wanted to see me, so I grabbed a sandwich. 173 00:15:44,027 --> 00:15:48,113 - What can I do for you? - Mr. Peterson's left the agency. 174 00:15:48,990 --> 00:15:51,575 If that's your news, I think you've been scooped. 175 00:15:51,659 --> 00:15:53,076 So you've heard? 176 00:15:53,161 --> 00:15:56,872 Let's just say he did not "go gentle into that good night." 177 00:15:57,498 --> 00:16:00,751 So you're probably wondering where that leaves you. 178 00:16:02,378 --> 00:16:05,631 - Should I be worried? - No, I should say not. 179 00:16:06,716 --> 00:16:09,134 We're making you head of accounts. 180 00:16:10,219 --> 00:16:14,097 Spectacular. Thanks a lot. 181 00:16:14,849 --> 00:16:18,060 We're charting the course of transition right now. 182 00:16:18,186 --> 00:16:20,479 There are many details to come. 183 00:16:22,065 --> 00:16:25,609 I wouldn't be much of an account man if I didn't ask what it pays. 184 00:16:25,693 --> 00:16:30,197 I wouldn't be much of a financial officer if I wasn't prepared to disappoint you. 185 00:16:30,281 --> 00:16:34,242 It's 21, but we'll reevaluate this year. 186 00:16:35,912 --> 00:16:40,207 Ken, this is not for broadcast. There'll be a formal announcement. 187 00:16:40,917 --> 00:16:42,084 Great. 188 00:17:01,771 --> 00:17:05,482 You believe this? What is the world coming to? 189 00:17:05,775 --> 00:17:09,611 - That is a big bottle. - That's not a bottle. That's his date. 190 00:17:09,862 --> 00:17:14,533 - "My, oh, my, what a big bottle you have." - "I'm sorry, honey, but I'm taken. 191 00:17:15,451 --> 00:17:19,496 "I just pawned my typewriter so we could be together all weekend." 192 00:17:19,706 --> 00:17:23,500 The captain's about to announce our descent into Friendship. Quick refill? 193 00:17:23,584 --> 00:17:27,129 I don't know. Don't you need something to run the plane? 194 00:17:27,630 --> 00:17:30,674 - And what about you, Mr. Hofstadt? - Excuse me? 195 00:17:31,592 --> 00:17:35,053 I took a look at your luggage. You're William Hofstadt? 196 00:17:36,806 --> 00:17:41,643 Bill. Call me Bill. And this is my associate, Mr. Fleischmann. 197 00:17:42,562 --> 00:17:44,479 - Sam. - Shelley. 198 00:17:45,314 --> 00:17:49,651 - Are you headed to Baltimore or DC? - Baltimore. 199 00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:52,946 Well, how about that? We're heading to Hausner's for dinner. 200 00:17:53,030 --> 00:17:56,074 You should've been in line two hours ago if you want to eat by 8:00. 201 00:17:56,159 --> 00:17:59,494 Lorelei has made some inroads with the maitre d'. 202 00:17:59,787 --> 00:18:02,664 Well, we have to check in, and we have an early meeting. 203 00:18:02,749 --> 00:18:05,375 - Where are you staying? - The Belvedere. 204 00:18:05,793 --> 00:18:08,170 Well, this is too much. Us, too. 205 00:18:11,132 --> 00:18:14,926 7:30. It'll be a hoot and a half. 206 00:18:17,513 --> 00:18:21,266 Now you have to take someone else's luggage. Bill Hoffman's. 207 00:18:22,477 --> 00:18:25,520 Hofstadt. My brother-in-law. 208 00:18:27,148 --> 00:18:28,607 He borrowed a suitcase to go to Puerto Rico, 209 00:18:28,691 --> 00:18:32,694 but he never tires of putting his name on other people's things. 210 00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:38,700 I've flown a few times, but I've never actually seen a stewardess that game. 211 00:18:39,452 --> 00:18:40,660 Really? 212 00:18:43,915 --> 00:18:44,956 This is your captain... 213 00:18:46,751 --> 00:18:49,795 Hello, Kenny. Any plans tonight? 214 00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:55,634 All I know is to avoid Grand Central. I heard Burt Peterson's still at the bar. 215 00:18:55,885 --> 00:18:59,721 Oh, no. It had to happen, I guess. 216 00:19:01,057 --> 00:19:04,810 He didn't put up much of a fight. Not counting today, I mean. 217 00:19:04,894 --> 00:19:08,146 - It's a tough job. - No doubt about that. 218 00:19:25,623 --> 00:19:29,876 I just want to let you know, I've always been a big fan of your work, 219 00:19:30,294 --> 00:19:32,754 and I've been very vocal about it. 220 00:19:34,215 --> 00:19:35,924 I appreciate that. 221 00:19:37,552 --> 00:19:40,387 Maybe now things will finally settle down. 222 00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:43,098 That's true. 223 00:19:47,103 --> 00:19:50,772 Listen, I just want to say that through all of this, 224 00:19:51,774 --> 00:19:55,652 I know that you were there reminding me that I can do this job. 225 00:19:56,946 --> 00:20:00,615 Well, you're welcome. I guess it's because I think you can. 226 00:20:03,870 --> 00:20:05,996 - Have a good night. - You, too. 227 00:20:08,624 --> 00:20:12,043 And my friend and I were listening to some radio program, 228 00:20:12,128 --> 00:20:14,963 and we had this huge bag of Fritos... 229 00:20:15,548 --> 00:20:17,883 We're not allowed in uniform... 230 00:20:17,967 --> 00:20:21,970 So, at some point my friend stops eating, but I can't. 231 00:20:24,473 --> 00:20:30,353 And I ate all of them and I got so... It was quite unladylike. 232 00:20:32,815 --> 00:20:37,986 - And I still can't eat them to today. - Too much of a good thing. It happens. 233 00:20:38,487 --> 00:20:40,780 I think accounting sounds fascinating. 234 00:20:40,865 --> 00:20:44,576 Going through other people's bank accounts? It sounds sexy. 235 00:20:45,661 --> 00:20:49,748 Jesus, Lorelei, how deep did you have to dig to come up with that? 236 00:20:50,750 --> 00:20:53,501 Why would you insult a man's profession? 237 00:20:54,211 --> 00:20:58,298 No, it's okay. I don't usually tell people I'm an accountant. 238 00:20:59,675 --> 00:21:04,179 Listen, Billy, Sam, I didn't mean to insult your profession. 239 00:21:04,847 --> 00:21:06,389 Don't sweat it. 240 00:21:08,434 --> 00:21:12,395 Of course, you do know there are different kinds of accountants. 241 00:21:12,605 --> 00:21:13,939 Are there? 242 00:21:15,816 --> 00:21:19,486 - Tell them what we do. - I don't know, Bill. 243 00:21:22,615 --> 00:21:27,410 - I'm gonna have to swear you all to secrecy. - You can't guarantee that. 244 00:21:29,497 --> 00:21:30,956 You're right. 245 00:21:33,042 --> 00:21:36,670 Well, someone just brought everything to a screeching halt. 246 00:21:36,754 --> 00:21:38,296 We'll be good. 247 00:21:45,054 --> 00:21:46,805 You ever heard of James Hoffa? 248 00:21:46,889 --> 00:21:51,351 You know, I don't just throw away newspapers every day, I also read them. 249 00:21:52,103 --> 00:21:54,896 There is a lot of money missing. 250 00:21:56,065 --> 00:21:58,566 And they don't really keep receipts. 251 00:21:59,694 --> 00:22:03,238 - So you're a couple of G-men? - No, we're accountants. 252 00:22:09,453 --> 00:22:13,164 Isn't the service exquisite? I'm based in New York. 253 00:22:13,416 --> 00:22:17,711 I'd always rather be there, but it's my job to be out of town. 254 00:22:21,507 --> 00:22:25,510 I don't know. I keep going to a lot of places 255 00:22:25,594 --> 00:22:28,388 and ending up somewhere I've already been. 256 00:22:33,477 --> 00:22:36,438 - How about a nightcap? - Well, I don't know. 257 00:22:38,858 --> 00:22:40,483 Your face is red. 258 00:22:45,573 --> 00:22:47,032 Order for us. 259 00:23:11,307 --> 00:23:16,019 Felt self-conscious there for a moment. We're the only ones without a uniform. 260 00:23:19,982 --> 00:23:22,275 - Good night, Bill. - Sam. 261 00:23:22,943 --> 00:23:25,612 Shelley, it's been swelly. 262 00:23:35,664 --> 00:23:41,044 - Well, this is me. - Let me see if it's different than my floor. 263 00:24:12,660 --> 00:24:14,327 What are we doing? 264 00:24:16,539 --> 00:24:18,039 I don't know. 265 00:24:29,593 --> 00:24:31,010 I'm engaged. 266 00:24:34,849 --> 00:24:39,018 On the other hand, you might be my last chance. 267 00:24:44,567 --> 00:24:49,112 I've been married a long time. You get plenty of chances. 268 00:25:00,541 --> 00:25:02,208 It's my birthday. 269 00:25:05,254 --> 00:25:07,922 Really? Is it? 270 00:25:10,384 --> 00:25:11,843 It really is. 271 00:25:14,430 --> 00:25:16,806 Let me see your driver's license. 272 00:25:18,851 --> 00:25:20,727 That's not gonna help. 273 00:25:25,691 --> 00:25:27,233 Happy birthday. 274 00:26:05,481 --> 00:26:10,693 Hello. My air conditioner does not work. It is stagnant in here. 275 00:26:13,656 --> 00:26:16,157 Take your hand out. I can't breathe. 276 00:26:22,164 --> 00:26:23,414 Stand up. 277 00:26:26,460 --> 00:26:30,880 Lorelei thinks you look like Ty Power. Remember him? 278 00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:38,846 Go on. 279 00:26:49,608 --> 00:26:53,945 And while you're distracted, I'm gonna take off my shoes. Is that okay? 280 00:27:04,915 --> 00:27:06,249 Your turn. 281 00:27:08,168 --> 00:27:09,377 Not yet. 282 00:27:27,187 --> 00:27:28,563 Do you like? 283 00:27:30,941 --> 00:27:35,403 Everyone's always asking me if I was a model, but I wasn't. 284 00:27:41,618 --> 00:27:45,371 The one I have at home is different. Hope I didn't break it. 285 00:27:48,417 --> 00:27:50,835 No, it's fine. Just a minute. 286 00:27:53,714 --> 00:27:55,048 Thank you. 287 00:28:36,382 --> 00:28:37,632 Airplane. 288 00:28:51,355 --> 00:28:52,605 Oh, God. 289 00:29:09,123 --> 00:29:10,331 Jesus. 290 00:29:14,545 --> 00:29:16,629 - What is that? - Fire alarm. 291 00:29:20,050 --> 00:29:21,717 Come on, let's go. 292 00:29:28,183 --> 00:29:31,185 Come on. Forget your shoes. Let's go. Come on. 293 00:29:48,370 --> 00:29:49,620 Come on. 294 00:30:14,313 --> 00:30:16,564 Do you have another cigarette? 295 00:30:23,614 --> 00:30:25,656 Everything's okay, folks. 296 00:30:43,383 --> 00:30:45,051 - Morning. - Morning. 297 00:30:46,845 --> 00:30:49,472 You ever get nervous wearing that on the subway? 298 00:30:49,556 --> 00:30:53,559 I don't ride the subway. I do worry about being followed, though. 299 00:30:55,437 --> 00:30:59,106 I think Lola takes a horse and buggy. She's never on time. 300 00:31:00,108 --> 00:31:03,027 - I'm not at work yet. - I don't want to sit in my office 301 00:31:03,111 --> 00:31:05,988 and listen to someone talk about their water retention. 302 00:31:06,073 --> 00:31:10,618 - Peggy, brides are very self-conscious. - Lf she's so worried about getting married, 303 00:31:10,702 --> 00:31:14,205 then why is she shamelessly flirting with Moneypenny all the time? 304 00:31:14,289 --> 00:31:18,209 - Don't call him that. He hates that. - Are you defending him? 305 00:31:19,419 --> 00:31:22,129 He's repellant. Reminds me of a doorman. 306 00:31:23,799 --> 00:31:25,967 And the typing she does for him? 307 00:31:26,176 --> 00:31:29,136 Oh, God, I'm so glad I'm gonna be out of here soon. 308 00:31:29,221 --> 00:31:32,807 - That's very comforting, Joan. - There's nothing I can do. 309 00:31:36,270 --> 00:31:39,313 - Congratulations. - Thank you. 310 00:31:39,648 --> 00:31:43,776 Mr. Pryce just called. There's a meeting for the heads of accounts immediately. 311 00:31:43,860 --> 00:31:44,902 Excuse me? 312 00:31:44,987 --> 00:31:48,531 Mr. Pryce called a big meeting for you and Mr. Cosgrove. 313 00:31:49,783 --> 00:31:51,867 What are you talking about? 314 00:31:54,580 --> 00:31:57,540 Whatever the circumstances, it's nice to see you. 315 00:31:57,624 --> 00:32:00,459 I'm just here to show you the continuity of our service. 316 00:32:00,544 --> 00:32:03,838 That with or without Burt Peterson, you are on our mind. 317 00:32:11,096 --> 00:32:14,473 - I apologize. - Morris, you remember Salvatore Romano. 318 00:32:14,725 --> 00:32:17,268 I don't know how, but I left my plane ticket at the hotel. 319 00:32:17,352 --> 00:32:21,856 He's the guy with the marker who always does what I say. Words, pictures. 320 00:32:22,190 --> 00:32:24,525 - Sal, this is Howard. - Pleasure. 321 00:32:26,445 --> 00:32:31,365 - I don't remember... Do you have a family? - Not yet. I have a wife. 322 00:32:32,868 --> 00:32:36,412 Well, Howard is my son. He's gonna be part of this from now on, 323 00:32:36,496 --> 00:32:39,665 starting with taking you two gentlemen on a tour. 324 00:32:41,877 --> 00:32:44,712 That's it? You're not gonna say anything? 325 00:32:47,007 --> 00:32:50,635 My father is extremely concerned about the business right now. 326 00:32:50,719 --> 00:32:52,428 Well, is it about our work? 327 00:32:52,512 --> 00:32:54,847 I mean, we don't want to take credit for everything, 328 00:32:54,931 --> 00:32:57,808 but two of every three raincoats sold last year 329 00:32:57,893 --> 00:33:00,144 had "London Fog" stitched on the inside pocket. 330 00:33:00,228 --> 00:33:04,065 Dad is worried that everyone who's ever going to buy a raincoat already has one. 331 00:33:04,149 --> 00:33:08,319 Because a business has to get bigger every year. That's capitalism. 332 00:33:12,240 --> 00:33:17,953 Well, our worst fears lie in anticipation. That's not me, that's Balzac. 333 00:33:18,789 --> 00:33:21,749 Balzac, huh? You are not Burt Peterson. 334 00:33:22,417 --> 00:33:25,211 I've been investigating umbrellas, bags, hats. 335 00:33:25,295 --> 00:33:28,506 There are companies that all they do is make hats. 336 00:33:29,883 --> 00:33:34,261 London Fog is a 40-year-old brand that sounds like it's existed forever. 337 00:33:34,805 --> 00:33:39,100 You've established, with our help, that it means one thing, raincoats. 338 00:33:39,434 --> 00:33:43,896 New products aside, there will be fat years and there will be lean years, 339 00:33:44,064 --> 00:33:46,023 but it is going to rain. 340 00:33:49,945 --> 00:33:51,362 That's true. 341 00:33:53,865 --> 00:33:56,784 Let's see if we can find you some earplugs. 342 00:34:00,038 --> 00:34:05,292 Bacardi, Belle Jolie, Birds Eye, Cadbury, Campbell Soup International, 343 00:34:05,627 --> 00:34:09,463 Cartwright double-sided aluminum, Chevron oil, Dunkin' Donuts, 344 00:34:09,631 --> 00:34:14,760 General Foods Europe, Kodak, Lever Brothers, Martinsons, Popsicle, 345 00:34:15,053 --> 00:34:18,264 Relaxacisor, Rio De Janeiro, which is dormant, 346 00:34:18,890 --> 00:34:21,142 United Fruit, Warner Brothers. 347 00:34:22,644 --> 00:34:26,731 And now for Mr. Campbell. Admiral Television, Alpine Real Estate, 348 00:34:26,857 --> 00:34:32,737 Bethlehem Steel, Con Ed, Gillette, Gorton's, Liberty Capital Savings, Lucky Strike, 349 00:34:32,821 --> 00:34:38,367 Maytag, North American Aviation, P&G Pampers, Playtex, Samsonite, 350 00:34:38,493 --> 00:34:41,078 Secor Laxatives, Snyder's Ketchup, Utz. 351 00:34:41,163 --> 00:34:43,998 - Why does he have Utz? - Some of this was done based on accounts, 352 00:34:44,082 --> 00:34:46,333 and some of this was done based on relationships, 353 00:34:46,418 --> 00:34:49,295 and you figure out what happened with Utz. 354 00:34:49,546 --> 00:34:51,672 So you decided all of this? 355 00:34:51,798 --> 00:34:53,632 Forty-two cents of every dollar at this agency 356 00:34:53,717 --> 00:34:57,178 is spent in the television department, but no, we did. 357 00:34:59,681 --> 00:35:02,016 - What are these "O's" for? - Olson. 358 00:35:02,184 --> 00:35:04,685 - She's all over the place. - You know that's not true. 359 00:35:04,770 --> 00:35:07,313 You're each taking half the company. 360 00:35:08,732 --> 00:35:11,692 Of course it's possible someone could distinguish themselves. 361 00:35:11,777 --> 00:35:13,778 Would be easier that way. 362 00:35:24,623 --> 00:35:28,709 - Can you believe this? - Lf you're upset, you seem to be hiding it. 363 00:35:28,877 --> 00:35:32,338 I'm excited. I mean, I feel badly about Burt Peterson. 364 00:35:32,506 --> 00:35:34,465 Three kids, wife with cancer. 365 00:35:34,549 --> 00:35:37,885 But you greased up the chute and shoved him down it. 366 00:35:38,512 --> 00:35:40,513 What could possibly be the matter? 367 00:35:40,597 --> 00:35:44,141 Why did you even accept this? You have no interest in this. 368 00:35:44,226 --> 00:35:47,520 - Why wouldn't I want this? - Because you're no good. 369 00:35:48,563 --> 00:35:52,566 They want us to hate each other. I refuse to participate in that. 370 00:35:53,443 --> 00:35:56,779 Very nice. Very, very nice. 371 00:35:58,156 --> 00:36:00,574 Look at you. Never break a sweat. 372 00:36:00,700 --> 00:36:05,454 You're right, I should just lay down and we should run together, holding hands. 373 00:36:20,929 --> 00:36:24,098 - What time is it? - 1: 15. 374 00:36:25,642 --> 00:36:30,145 - We should be back in the office by 3:00. - We're going back to the office? 375 00:36:39,990 --> 00:36:41,365 I'm going to ask you something, 376 00:36:41,449 --> 00:36:44,535 and I want you to be completely honest with me. 377 00:36:51,126 --> 00:36:52,459 London Fog. 378 00:36:56,673 --> 00:37:00,801 It's a subway car, and there's a commuter looking up. 379 00:37:01,803 --> 00:37:06,599 There's a girl with her back to us. She's wearing one of those short tan ones, 380 00:37:06,683 --> 00:37:09,143 but it's open. Her legs are bare. 381 00:37:10,604 --> 00:37:12,605 We know what he's seeing. 382 00:37:14,774 --> 00:37:17,026 "Limit your exposure." 383 00:37:21,489 --> 00:37:22,823 That's it. 384 00:37:27,746 --> 00:37:28,829 Good. 385 00:37:42,177 --> 00:37:44,595 Mr. Hooker, may I speak with you? 386 00:37:48,850 --> 00:37:53,395 I thought it was a good idea that PPL had an office for when visitors come. 387 00:37:53,521 --> 00:37:54,939 Of course, it would make sense for someone 388 00:37:55,023 --> 00:37:57,524 to be occupying it in the meantime. 389 00:37:59,152 --> 00:38:01,111 I rustled up an office for you. 390 00:38:01,196 --> 00:38:03,989 I hope you find it appropriate to your status. 391 00:38:04,074 --> 00:38:05,491 My position. 392 00:38:06,326 --> 00:38:08,786 It's near Mr. Pryce. It's not exactly in the thick of things, 393 00:38:08,870 --> 00:38:10,704 but you will have someone to attend to your typing, 394 00:38:10,789 --> 00:38:13,290 to avoid you siphoning off the man-hours. 395 00:38:13,375 --> 00:38:17,419 - My own girl? Of my choosing? - I will have a lineup. 396 00:38:18,922 --> 00:38:20,297 Did he take the ant farm? 397 00:38:20,382 --> 00:38:23,717 No, it's actually Mr. Cooper's. It just lives there. 398 00:38:28,932 --> 00:38:33,978 Hello, sweetheart. Now, don't be cross. I'll only be a minute. 399 00:38:37,399 --> 00:38:39,400 - Do you have a fever? - No. 400 00:38:49,244 --> 00:38:52,413 "The buck stops here," unless it stops over there. 401 00:38:52,872 --> 00:38:54,498 What's the matter? 402 00:38:54,582 --> 00:38:58,752 There's two heads of accounts. Kenny Cosgrove and I are sharing it. 403 00:39:01,089 --> 00:39:05,801 - I'm so sorry. - I was sitting there and they just read off 404 00:39:05,885 --> 00:39:10,055 a list of names, a list of companies. That's my life. 405 00:39:16,896 --> 00:39:21,692 I know you won't like hearing this, but you're a lot like my father. 406 00:39:22,944 --> 00:39:24,278 You're an ambitious man, 407 00:39:24,362 --> 00:39:27,531 and an ambitious man is never happy with what he has. 408 00:39:27,615 --> 00:39:32,161 Why does it always have to be like this? Why can't I get anything good all at once? 409 00:39:32,245 --> 00:39:37,374 This is an amazing opportunity. They believe in you. Don't turn it sour. 410 00:39:37,584 --> 00:39:41,420 It's a test. Why not just cut it short and tell them I want it? 411 00:39:41,504 --> 00:39:45,466 You can do whatever you want, but they do not want to hear your outrage. 412 00:39:45,550 --> 00:39:49,261 - They want you to beat Ken. - I know what they want, Trudy. 413 00:39:49,971 --> 00:39:54,349 And honestly, I don't know. I can't live with this! 414 00:40:00,607 --> 00:40:02,149 But you'll try. 415 00:40:08,448 --> 00:40:13,660 It's great. It's a great ad. So, how was everything in Baltimore? 416 00:40:14,370 --> 00:40:16,330 Out of town. Don Draper. 417 00:40:16,748 --> 00:40:18,832 - It was first class. - Go on. 418 00:40:19,250 --> 00:40:20,918 Two old married men. 419 00:40:21,002 --> 00:40:23,420 There was a fire in the hotel, but no casualties. 420 00:40:23,505 --> 00:40:24,922 That's too bad. 421 00:40:25,006 --> 00:40:28,592 For casting this lucky fellow in the subway, what's he look like? 422 00:40:28,676 --> 00:40:32,846 I don't know. A little excited. A little shocked. 423 00:40:32,931 --> 00:40:36,725 - No, what's he look like? - Handsome. 424 00:40:43,191 --> 00:40:48,278 Your girl's gone. I have Stolichnaya and Cuban cigars. 425 00:40:48,571 --> 00:40:52,324 I sent them from Greece. I should've tried a pound of opium. 426 00:40:55,078 --> 00:40:59,706 Help yourself. So, Cosgrove versus Campbell. 427 00:41:01,709 --> 00:41:03,752 Is Cooper playing God or Darwin? 428 00:41:03,837 --> 00:41:06,880 I know it sounds Japanese, but it's not Cooper. 429 00:41:07,799 --> 00:41:10,300 Lane read about it in some management book? 430 00:41:10,385 --> 00:41:13,011 I think it came from the home office. 431 00:41:14,597 --> 00:41:17,224 When he told me about it, I thought he was joking. 432 00:41:17,308 --> 00:41:21,812 I told him it was a stupid idea, but they don't always get our inflection. 433 00:41:24,357 --> 00:41:27,276 - Can I speak with you for a moment? - Come in. 434 00:41:34,242 --> 00:41:35,367 What? 435 00:41:35,577 --> 00:41:36,577 I... 436 00:41:39,914 --> 00:41:44,293 I just wanted to let you both know how honored I am with this promotion. 437 00:41:46,129 --> 00:41:49,923 Help yourself. Not the Stoli. 438 00:41:51,843 --> 00:41:56,722 Hello. Mr. Campbell, I was going to tell Don, 439 00:41:56,806 --> 00:41:59,183 but I can tell you myself. 440 00:42:01,227 --> 00:42:06,982 I have an old pal at the mayor's office that wants to do a small campaign for... 441 00:42:07,442 --> 00:42:11,445 I don't know, something about Penn Station. 442 00:42:12,947 --> 00:42:14,948 It'd be my pleasure. Bert? 443 00:42:16,618 --> 00:42:18,368 Is there any brandy? 444 00:42:19,954 --> 00:42:21,622 Any glass will do. 445 00:42:24,209 --> 00:42:27,628 I told him that despite life under British rule, 446 00:42:28,504 --> 00:42:31,256 we still had a real Yankee. 447 00:42:34,719 --> 00:42:40,557 I don't care what they say. London Fog is a great name. 448 00:42:51,861 --> 00:42:56,156 I like the ants. There's no shortage of distractions here. 449 00:42:56,991 --> 00:43:00,494 Now, if we can find a proper pub, we'll have everything. 450 00:43:04,123 --> 00:43:06,166 Why do you have this office? 451 00:43:06,251 --> 00:43:10,671 I thought it was necessary that we have a place for when superiors visit. 452 00:43:11,673 --> 00:43:15,425 Of course, it would make sense for someone to occupy it in the meantime. 453 00:43:15,510 --> 00:43:17,552 It's a harebrained idea. 454 00:43:19,013 --> 00:43:21,848 We just fired one third of their workforce. 455 00:43:21,933 --> 00:43:25,143 It's unseemly to go through their pockets as well. 456 00:43:26,312 --> 00:43:29,523 A visitor's office is good, but you sit out front. 457 00:43:29,983 --> 00:43:32,276 Of course. It was presumptuous. 458 00:43:38,408 --> 00:43:42,202 - This place is a gynocracy. - Hadn't noticed. 459 00:43:47,000 --> 00:43:49,626 My only point is, if you decide to take the train tomorrow 460 00:43:49,711 --> 00:43:52,963 and you run into Carlton, I told them we were busy. 461 00:43:54,090 --> 00:43:56,091 Our stories are straight. 462 00:43:56,467 --> 00:43:59,636 Sally has something to tell you. Sally! 463 00:44:00,805 --> 00:44:03,724 I got it out of her. Out. 464 00:44:10,982 --> 00:44:12,232 Go ahead. 465 00:44:14,277 --> 00:44:16,611 I'm sorry I broke your suitcase. 466 00:44:17,905 --> 00:44:21,742 Find out how much it is to repair, and it'll come out of your allowance. 467 00:44:21,826 --> 00:44:25,203 - I don't have an allowance. - Then don't break things. 468 00:44:27,373 --> 00:44:30,459 I just thought... I just didn't want you to go. 469 00:44:34,047 --> 00:44:35,380 Come here. 470 00:44:39,218 --> 00:44:44,222 I will always come home, and you'll always be my girl. 471 00:44:59,614 --> 00:45:04,618 - Your eyes look tired. - I don't sleep well when I'm not here. 472 00:45:06,329 --> 00:45:09,664 You squint too much. You need reading glasses. 473 00:45:11,000 --> 00:45:14,795 Daddy, Daddy! Are these for me? 474 00:45:17,131 --> 00:45:20,384 - Yes. - Give me that. It's a stickpin. 475 00:45:28,351 --> 00:45:29,810 There you go. 476 00:45:31,896 --> 00:45:34,481 - Was I really in there? - Nine months. 477 00:45:36,401 --> 00:45:38,819 Tell me about the day I was born. 478 00:45:46,244 --> 00:45:51,248 Well, it was the middle of the night, 479 00:45:52,917 --> 00:45:56,294 and it was raining very hard. 480 00:45:59,340 --> 00:46:01,842 And I had just come home from work. 481 00:46:09,475 --> 00:46:13,103 He did not feel like getting back in the car, but he did. 482 00:46:14,188 --> 00:46:17,732 He took my suitcase and my little stuffed Eeyore 483 00:46:17,817 --> 00:46:20,360 that I knew I was going to give you.