Covert intelligence involves a lot of waiting around.
Know what it's like being a spy?
Like sitting in your dentist's reception area 24 hours a day.
You read magazines, sip coffee, and ever so often someone tries to kill you.
Get in.
You know, Mercedes makes an S.U.V. now.
Big backseat. It's great.
Surprisingly affordable too.
C.I.A.
What do you say to that? No?
Explain that a lot of spies don't work directly for the C.I.A.?
Lot of good that'll do.
Welcome!
Mr. C.I.A. No, no, no, no. I don't work for anybody directly.
That's why I get to do stuff like give you $750,000...
to stop blowing up oil refineries.
Come.
Hi. Hi. Hi, everybody.
Whoa. Easy, guys. Easy. Just gettin' a map.
You guarantee security for the Nembe oil field. No fires, no explosions.
Nobody falls into a swamp and gets eaten by an alligator.
- You mean crocodile. - Yes, that's... I-I mean crocodile.
We agreed? Da.
I'm now reaching into my jacket for my phone...
so I can get this man his money, see?
That's okay.
Hello. Yes, I have the wire transfer information.
The A.B.A. number is 0210010175.
It's off. We got a burn notice on you. You're blacklisted.
Excuse me? I'm sorry.
Is there problem?
No, no problem. Computer mix-up... P.C., Mac.
Hello? Put your boss on the phone right now.
I'm sorry. I can't help you.
I have a wire transfer number: 0210010...
You C.I.A. bastard! You think you can steal from me?
Sometimes the truth hurts.
In these situations, I recommend lying.
C.I.A! I'm C.I... I'm C.I.A.! I've got your money!
Enough, enough! Pick him up.
I've got the money. It's not here. I can take you to it though.
I was gonna steal it and blame it on you guys. It's not personal. Okay?
I was just... It was what I was gonna do.
Uh, in 20 minutes, you'll have your money. I promise.
Take him.
I need the bathroom. I'm gonna be sick. I'm gonna...
Wait, wait! I'm gonna be sick. I need the bathroom!
I... I'm gonna be sick in the Mercedes, you understand?
In the Mercedes... Blood everywhere.
In a fight, you have to be careful...
not to break the little bones in your hand on someone's face.
That's why I like bathrooms. Lots of hard surfaces.
Sorry. I'll leave it at the airport.
Quick, quick!
Southern Nigeria isn't my favorite place in the world.
It's unstable, it's corrupt,
and the people there eat a lot of terrible-smelling preserved fish.
I will say this for Nigeria though... It's the gun-running capital of Africa.
And that makes it a bad place to drive a passenger sedan into a crowded market.
Back off! Back off!
Right this way, sir.
If you're gonna collapse on a plane, I recommend business class.
The seats are bigger if you start convulsing.
Although once you pass out...
Are you okay?
It really doesn't matter.
Oh, no.
You're a lucky man.
That many bruises, anyone would think you fell under a truck.
Fiona, what are you doin'?
You've been out for a couple of days. The maid got curious, went through your stuff.
You still have me in your wallet as your emergency contact.
You take that out when you leave someone, you know.
Flattered you came. Don't be.
I needed to get out of New York anyway.
Old associates sniffing around.
And I wanted to try someplace sunny,
and it sounded like you might die.
I-I wanted to be there at the end...
to tell you what a bastard you were.
- Sunny. Where am I? - Miami.
Apparently, you collapsed on the flight out of Nigeria.
Miami? Why am I here?
The airline would only say they were instructed to fly you here.
Instructed? What does that mean?
It's... It's home, in a manner of speaking, isn't it?
Oh! I called your mom.
- My mother? - Yeah, yeah. We had a lovely chat.
She's thrilled you're home for Christmas.
Home for... Uh, no. I'm not home. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I'm gonna... I'm gonna go.
Leavin'? Uh, yeah.
Yeah. You're good at that.
Yeah, it's just better if my mother and I aren't in the same hemisphere.
Fiona, someone put a burn notice out on me.
I gotta take care of this now,
or a few cracked ribs will be the least of my worries.
Surveillance. Two-man team, F.B.I.
Fi, why don't you go run interference for me? Please, Fi. Come on.
Make one of those scenes of yours, you know?
Bite one of 'em. Set the other on fire. Just do it in about 10 minutes.
I need to clean up.
You'll owe me dinner.
Fine.
Most people would be thrilled to be dumped in Miami.
Sadly, I am not most people.
Spend a few years as a covert operative,
and a sunny beach just looks like a vulnerable tactical position with no decent cover.
I've never found a good way to hide a gun in a bathing suit.
Welcome to the Chadwicke, sir. I need a room one, maybe two nights.
We've got a 10th-floor suite with an ocean view.
Uh, I don't want a view. Uh, facing a wall, something with no windows, if you have it.
Far from the elevators, close to the exits, if you have it.
Hmm. Do you have another card? Uh, this one was declined.
Declined?
I... I don't care what the computer says.
I want my money from my account.
I understand that, sir. I...
Let me check with the manager.
When a spy gets fired,
he doesn't get a call from the lady in H.R. and a gold watch.
They cut him off. They make sure he can never work again.
They can't take away his skills or what's in his head,
so they take away the resources that allow him to function.
They burn him. All I know is the account is frozen.
The, um, code is government related.
If you care to discuss this with the police...
Hey! Hi.
You look like you could use a free hat.
Uh, pay phone? Huh?
You put coins in and then...
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, right over there.
Hello. I need to speak with Dan Siebels.
I'm sorry. There's no one here by that name. He's my case officer.
I need to speak with him. I know the protocol. Sir...
I know you're just doing your job, but I don't have access to a secure line.
I'm sorry, sir. I can't help you. This is Michael Westen...
Just put Dan on the phone! Sir, I can't help you.
He's my handler. I've worked with him for 15 goddamn years...
Sir, there is no one here by that name.
Sorry, kid. Please, we trained together.
Uh, there's a Lucite plaque on his desk with a bullet hole in it. He drinks Sprite.
He's a friend. I cannot express enough how urgent this... Sir, I can't help you.
No, no! Don't hang up on me! You hung up. Oh...
When you're being watched, what you need is contrast...
A background that will make the surveillance stand out.
An F.B.I. field office is full of guys in their 40s.
At most South Beach business hotels,
it would be tough to tell which middle-aged white guy was watching you.
So you stay in the place where everyone is a Jell-o shot away from alcohol poisoning.
If you see someone who can walk a straight line, that's the fed.
In Miami. I need the address for SecuriCorp.
Brickell Ave. South?
Thanks.
Sorry. Wrong room. Come on.
No, wait. He's kind of hot.
Just...
Kids, come here.
See that cop?
I'll give you guys five bucks each if you go over and tell him...
that a man in that car over there tried to make you sit on his lap.
Can you do that?
Make it 10 bucks each.
Fifteen, but you split it. All right.
For 15, I want tears.
All right, dog.
Sick!
Hey, you. Step out of the car. Come on. Come on out.
Get out of the car. Come on, come on. Wai-Wai-Wait.
Officer, uh, Anderson. Let me show I.D. Yes, yes. Yes, yes.
Hey, now, no, no! Come on! Whoa! Come on!
Need to go someplace you're not wanted?
Any uniform store will sell you a messenger outfit,
and any messenger can get past a security desk.
Show him in.
Janet, can you give us a minute?
Wow! What an office.
Michael, what are you doing here? You cannot be here.
You heard then.
Are you kidding? You've been flagged on every government list.
- Why didn't you call me? - Would you have seen me if I did?
Of course not. Michael, you were always good at pissing people off, but this?
It's a mistake. It has to be. Just tell me what you've heard.
I don't know the details. I just heard you were out. That's it.
What the hell is that supposed to mean? I'm just out?
Am I your complaint hotline? It's what I heard. Lucy, I'm broke.
Bottom line, they trashed my credit, they froze my bank accounts.
If I'm gonna figure this out, I need to put some money together.
I don't have stacks of cash laying around, and even if I did, I...
- Lucy. - Michael.
Michael.
Okay, there may be something. I'll call Sam.
Sam? Sam Axe? You still work with him? Not when I can avoid it.
He's been drinking, sponging off of every rich divorcée in the greater Miami area.
I throw him a job every now and then when he's between sugar mommies.
- What's the job? - Guy's an operation manager at an estate in Miami Beach.
Anyway, the place got robbed, and it looks like he's in some kind of trouble.
What kind of trouble? He didn't want to get into it. We talked price.
Guy's breaking open his piggy bank.
I told him the job was a little small for us, but he sounded desperate,
so I told him I'd keep my eyes open.
- You're all heart. - Do you want the job or not?
- I'll call Sam. - Thank you, Lucy.
Get yourself cleaned up. New clothes. You look terrible.
You look good.
Ah. Don't go away.
Mama.
I assume you got word on my situation.
You know spies... bunch of bitchy little girls. Good news for you.
I'm a drunk and a washout already, so I can talk to whoever I want, burned or no.
You hear anything else? Nobody tells me anything.
- I'm not exactly security clearance material anymore. - Oh, Sam.
- Here you go. - There she is! Thank you. Keep 'em comin'.
Look at the bright side.
They wanted you dead, you'd be dead.
Florida will do you some good. I've been here a year, I've never been better.
Yeah, I understand your main source of income is an allowance from a lawyer's wife.
Hey, don't knock it... free clothes, ocean view apartment...
and an endless supply of little blue pills.
Speaking of apartments, you know a safe place I can stay?
I'm at a motel with the Girls Gone Wild.
I might know a guy. I'll make a call. How long you around?
Just long enough to put together some cash and track down this burn notice.
Hey, so this job tomorrow, you want to do the meeting,
or you need me to come along and hold your hand?
Yeah, I'll be fine, Sam.
With this much money, things get complicated.
And a week later you're on a speedboat in the Cayman Islands with someone shooting at you.
Mr. Westen.
I spoke to Lucy. Uh, she told me you do investigations. Um...
I do a lot of things.
Last month, there was a robbery.
Twenty-two million in odd jewelry and antiques.
- It was... It was very bad. - Well, looks like the police are into it.
Says here they're talking to persons of interest.
You're a person of interest.
The police asked me questions.
When this happened, I was at home watching TV with my kid.
The security code they used for the alarm... it's the master code... my code.
Oh. Besides, I supervise the staff and I set the shifts.
It looks bad. Yeah, that looks pretty bad.
I told the police I worked there 15 years. I would never do this.
Mr. Pyne talked to them, said it wasn't me.
They took my passport, told me not to travel.
If they arrest me, my son... He's... He's eight years old. I'm all he has.
Right, yes. "I'm desperate. Please don't make my son an orphan." I got it.
Just so we're clear, you want me to figure out who ran off with $22 million in stuff,
catch the bad guys, clear your name all for... what is it, $4,500?
4,600. Oh, well, that's much better.
I'm sorry. I have nowhere else to turn. Please.
All right. I'm gonna see what I can do.
I need to talk to your boss. Can I do that? Yeah, yeah. Come on.
Uh, what... what are you exactly, Mr. Westen? A private detective?
Oh, no. I wish. Nothing that official.
No, I'm just a friend of a friend in town for a while.
I thought I'd see if I could help. Oh, thank you.
Javier's been with me for a number of years.
It kills me to see what he's going through. What was stolen?
Oh, some jewelry, some artwork.
Insured, but the artwork was irreplaceable. Impressionists mostly.
I had a Sisley, a Clausen and some other works.
Houses, landscapes.
Now, I'm in real estate, so I've got this thing for houses.
And you're confident Javier had nothing to do with it?
Oh, hey, this is Miami.
Any incident, and the police blame the nearest Cuban or Haitian.
You should have seen the way they were all over my gardeners.
- What about the security codes? - Oh, Lord knows.
The police are looking into it.
But, you know, to be honest, I'm just glad nobody was hurt.
Was there anyone unknown to you around?
Guests, any new business associates that came to the house?
Not that I can think of. I went over all this with the police.
Now, you can talk to Vince if you want to. He takes care of my security.
I just have a few questions. See if anyone missed anything.
- We talked to the police. - I don't mean to bother you. It would be a big help.
- Does Mr. Pyne have any enemies? - Anybody worth a hundred mil has enemies.
Which is why he hired a bodyguard... I mean, a head of security.
I'm specifically talking about enemies that might rob his home though.
Listen. We know who did this.
Okay, Mr. Pyne has a soft spot for Javier.
I don't.
As far as I'm concerned, the sooner he's arrested, the better.
Well, you've been a big help.
Place is upstairs, in the back.
The rent is 200 a month, and, uh...
If anyone finds out I'm there, I say I broke in. Sam told me.
It's not so easy to live in this place, you know?
All night, club is "boom-boom." Fine. That's fine.
Uh, other thing...
The guy next door sells drugs to my customers, make fight with people.
I try to talk, he puts a gun in my face.
Now, at home, I can deal with a...
But here, with immigration, liquor license, is big risk for me, huh?
I can handle that. Yeah.
You're real Michael Westen, yes?
Yeah.
Back home, your story Russian intelligence tells to scare.
They say you're one name for many people.
Special Operations team.
They think one person cannot make so much problems.
Nope. Just me.
Oh, nice to meet you, Michael.
Is new world, yes?
Yes.
- Hello? - Michael?
Mom?
My mom would have been a great N.S.A. communications operative.
How did you get this number? That's how you greet your mother?
I got it from your girlfriend, Fiona. Mom, what do you want?
Were you gonna come and see me?
Oh. I'm not gonna be in town that long, so I can't.
Come now then. You could drive me to the doctor.
I don't even have a car, so I... Yeah. Well, you'll figure something out.
Drop me in the middle of the Gobi Desert,
bury me in a goddamn cave on the moon,
and somehow she'd find a way to call me and ask me for a favor.
I don't like stealing cars, but sometimes it's necessary.
I have rules though.
I'll keep it clean, and if I take your car on a work day, I'll have it back by 5:00.
Things have gone to hell since you left.
Thank God you're back. I'm not back.
You're here for the holidays though. I mean, you're staying for Christmas, aren't you?
Mom, don't smoke in the car, please. It's not mine. Please.
Figuring out if a car is tailing you...
is mostly about driving like you're an idiot.
You speed up, slow down, signal one way, turn the other.
Of course, ideally, you're doing this without your mother in the car.
Michael, where are you going? The hospital is on 20th.
This is a shortcut. Mom, please, do not smoke in the car.
Do not smoke in the car.
You know, you missed your father's funeral... by eight years.
Well, the last time I talked to him, he said, "I'll see you in hell, boy,"
so I figured we had something on the books.
Michael! The two of you were so much alike.
I don't know why you had to antagonize him.
Mom, we were nothing alike. Everything I did antagonized him.
Being alive antagonized him.
Everything I did was a reason for him to slap me around.
- Michael, what are you doing? - Will you... Who's driving? You or me?
Actually, losing a tail isn't about driving fast.
A high-speed pursuit is just gonna land you on the 6:00 news.
So you just keep driving like an idiot until the other guy makes a mistake.
Again, all of this is easier without a passenger yelling at you...
for missing a decade's worth of Thanksgivings.
You were the one that kept the family going.
After you left, everything just fell apart.
I've been sending money. What about Nate?
Don't get me started. Your brother is a mess.
You should go see him, Michael. It's almost Christmas.
I don't think it's a good idea for us to see each other.
I can't take care of him all by myself. I am sick. You know that I'm sick.
Well, what I know is that you've been treated for every disease known to man.
I know this because I'm paying all the bills.
Just because they can't find out what's wrong with me does not mean I'm not sick.
Please! Mother. Well, you don't know, Michael.
I don't tell you everything that goes on.
I don't need to know everything. Well...
Stop. Stop. Zip. What? Mike.
Look, we're here.
Are you coming in? No, I have to make a phone call, Ma, so...
I'm right behind you, Ma. Fine, Michael.
Okay, Mother.
Hello.
Yeah. Michael Westen for Dan Siebels. I'm sorry, sir.
Yeah, I know, I know. He doesn't exist.
You tell him from me, if he doesn't call me back,
I will be in touch with him soon.
Sorry, I'm, uh... I just... I'm not, uh...
Yeah, he's with her.
Sleep through an aerial bombing or two, and noise isn't an issue.
You just need some privacy and a bed.
In a pinch, you can lose the bed,
but the privacy's important for projects like this one.
With everyone x-raying and chemical testing their mail these days,
a box of wire and pipe and batteries sprinkled with chemical fertilizer...
is a great attention-getter.
Hey. Thanks for comin'. Come on in.
Come on in. You want some coffee? No. No.
It's not a problem. I made some fresh. Listen, I just wanted to...
Sit down, sit down. Just talk about...
- This is my son, David. David, say hi. - Hi.
- Are you a soldier? - Uh, no. Sort of.
My dad says you're here to help us.
Yeah, I might be. I just need to talk to your dad about some money first.
Then are you gonna shoot the people that robbed Mr. Pyne?
No, no. That shouldn't be necessary.
What if they shoot at you?
Well, in that case, it would be necessary, so yeah.
Okay. David, go play.
I can play here. In your room.
- Want to see my room? - David, go.
I'm sorry.
It's fine.
So, will you help?
I'll need half the money up front.
Uh, I don't know. Uh, 2,300 dol...
Okay, wait. Wait.
I need you to know something.
I'll follow this wherever it leads. I finish what I start.
We do it my way, no questions. Got it?
Thank you.
Workin' hard?
Tanning is an art and a science, Mike. You want something to drink?
- They got guys here, they'll bring you whatever you want. - No, I'm fine.
So, what have you found out about Pyne's hired gun?
Well, he washed out of the Rangers after a couple years.
Then he went to work for some private military outfit in Iraq...
Some kind of meathead mercenary sort of thing.
Any progress with the job?
I checked the estate's security logs. Nothin' there.
So it's the hard way then. The best angle is the art.
I find the buyer, I'll work my way back to who pulled off the job.
Well, how you gonna do that?
I need you to set up a meeting with me and Barry.
Can do.
Whether you're a coke dealer, a thief, an arms dealer or a spy,
you need someone to clean your money,
which makes a good money launderer the closest thing you can get...
to a Yellow Pages for criminals.
Even better, a money launderer will always take your phone call,
burn notice or no burn notice.
Good to see you. Heard about your troubles. So sorry.
I'm working on it. Thanks for coming, Barry.
I'm in a service industry. That's what I do. I help.
So, what you need?
An art dealer. No, no, no, no, no, no.
Art's a bad place to park money these days. I.R.S. is all over the place.
Plus some schmuck in New York says the wrong thing, you take a bath.
How 'bout stamps? Nice and portable. Liquidity's better.
Coins. Had this guy who does coins. All cash.
Has to be art. I need someone to find me a piece that's not on the regular market.
Hot paintings.
I might know someone. Uh, nobody gets hurt?
Nobody you care about.
Just remember who still helped you when you were down.
Me... Barry. That's who.
I gave you love. You'll remember?
I'll remember.
Oye, Martin.
Excuse me. I'm just...
Sorry, man. We were waitin' on Sugar and got carried away. You know how it is.
- Sugar? - Yeah.
I don't know his real name, but he usually hooks us up. We wanted to score some "E."
Are you the new guy? Leave.
Now.
- Mom, what is it? - This isn't your mom.
Dan. Dan, hey. Good to hear from you. I thought you lost my number.
Just spent three hours with the F.B.I. discussing your little present.
They wondered why someone was sending me a pipe bomb with no explosive in it.
I thought it'd get your attention.
So tell me what's goin' on. I don't know. Burn notice is eyes only.
For what it's worth, I think it's bull, but I don't control these things.
Well, tell me who to talk to, or I'm coming to D.C. and raising some hell.
Don't do that, Michael. You're on all the F.B.I. watch lists.
You go anywhere, they're all over you. What for?
All I know is that whoever did this wants you on ice.
You leave Miami, you heat up fast.
We're talking manhunt, police in every state.
Things may change, but for now, be smart. Lay low.
Can I at least see the burn notice?
If I could see who issued it, then maybe I can do something about this.
I risked enough just calling.
Look, some of us are still on your side.
You pull another stunt like this though, and I won't be one of 'em.
What's up, bro? You new around here?
Yeah.
Well, my name is Sugar, and I, uh...
I heard you messed with some of my friends last night.
- I asked a few of your customers to get out of here, yeah. - What's your problem?
My problem right now is a pretty boy drug dealer with a bad dye job is standing in my way.
Did I hurt you, bro?
Doesn't matter how much training you have.
A broken rib is a broken rib.
Don't start fights you can't finish, bro!
I'll break it.
I don't want to, but I will if I have to.
All right! All right, all right! All right. Let go!
Let go! Let go!
You come highly recommended, Mr. Westen.
What are you interested in?
Specifically?
British post-Impressionists. Sisley, Steer.
Ah, that's nice. We don't see much of that.
Most specialty stock is out of the East these days.
Iraqi antiquities, Russian icons. Mm-hmm.
Although that's mostly forged garbage.
I can get you some French Impressionists.
My collection is mostly focused on the Camden Town Group.
Very nice. I wish I had something.
Several pieces were on the market about six months ago.
There was a Sisley and several Clausens, although it didn't sell.
Really? Do you remember who?
Oh, I don't remember the name.
One of these condo developers that are everywhere these days.
Bought during the Impressionist bubble in the '90s.
He went to all the major dealers. Wanted to dump it.
It was all very discreet, but people talk.
Really? What happened? Nobody was interested is what happened.
Not at his price.
I'm sorry I can't help, but...
No, no, no. You... You have been very helpful. Thank you.
I do have some Greco-Roman nude wrestling statues you might like to take a look at.
I never run around in the bushes in a ski mask...
when I'm breaking in someplace.
Somebody catches you, what are you gonna say?
You want to look like a legitimate visitor until the very last minute.
If you can't look legit, confused works almost as well.
Maybe you get a soda from the fridge or a yogurt.
If you're caught, you just act confused and apologize like crazy for taking the yogurt.
Nothing could be more innocent.
Cracking an old-school safe is pretty tough,
but modern high-tech security makes it much easier.
Thing is, nobody wipes off a fingerprint scanner after they use it,
so what's left on the scanner, nine times out of 10,
is a fingerprint.
Fighting for the little guy is for suckers.
We all do it once in a while,
but the trick is to get in and out quickly without getting involved.
That's one trick I never really mastered.
Javier. Javier?
You want some cereal? No.
All I got is the one with the marshmallow guys, but it's good. It's David's favorite.
Don't worry about that. I want to talk to you before you go to work.
What is it? Is there something wrong? Yeah.
Basically, your boss sold you out. He robbed his own house.
Probably had Vince do the actual job.
But the bottom line is, he collects the insurance, and you're the fall guy.
Mr. Pyne? Nah, he wouldn't. He talked to the police for me. So what?
That just makes it easier for him to collect on the insurance.
You're a trusted employee. He had no idea.
Take a look at this.
Half his real estate projects are just paper...
Empty lots he paid a loan officer to sign off on.
He borrowed against those to finance other deals,
but with the market cooling, he's bleeding money, and the art is all he has.
Without the insurance payout, it all comes crashing down.
What do I do?
Well, you could go to jail... 10 years, give or take.
You could run. The statute of limitations is about 20 years.
Or you could fight back.
Fight back? Pyne doesn't want any of this to get out.
As long as we have this information, we have leverage.
But what do I do? I'll handle the details, but it could get dangerous.
People do bad things when this much money's on the line.
Money. I... Don't worry about the money.
You want to do this or not?
You're not going to work today or ever again.
I'm gonna go talk to Pyne, but be prepared. This could get sketchy.
Hey.
You really want me to shoot someone, don't you?
Hey.
So, Mr. Westen, what can I do for you?
I just wanted to update you.
Fortunately, I think we can be pretty sure that Javier had nothing to do with the robbery.
Have you spoken to the police?
I'm not sure you want me to do that. Yeah, take a look at this.
I think this points pretty clearly to, um...
Mmm, some other suspects.
- Where'd you get this? - I found it in the course of my investigation.
Cops might find it, too, if, say, Javier was arrested.
I'm guessing that's something you'd want to avoid.
Well, you two have a lot to talk about.
I know my way out.
Does that shirt come in men's?
You're head of my security!
Well, it's your job, damn it! You...
Powerful people don't like being pushed around.
You can never quite predict what they're going to do...
or have their washed-out Special Forces security guys do.
Point is, blackmail is a little like owning a pit bull.
It might protect you, or it might bite your hand off.
That's why it pays to make sure you know what they're thinking, and that means eavesdropping.
Hi. Can I help you?
Yeah, I need two of these...
and your cheapest phone.
- That one? - Oh, the Hello Sweetheart.
Is it for your little girl? No.
Oh, the Hello Sweetheart. Yeah, that's fine.
Okay.
To build a listening device, you need a crappy phone...
with a mike that picks up everything.
But you want the battery power and circuits of a better phone.
It's a trick you learn when the purchasing office won't spring for a bug.
Hello, Sweetheart.
So, Sam and I are gonna plant the bug tomorrow so we can listen in on Pyne.
Fi, I want to ask you, um...
Yeah? Uh, I need someone to track him,
provide a little tactical support.
Sure. It'll be just like the old days.
That sounds like fun. Glad you think so.
I haven't worked so hard for so little money since Afghanistan.
Afghanistan.
But at least there, my mother wasn't calling me 30 times a day.
Thank you for giving her my number. You're welcome.
Any thoughts as to why you're so unpopular?
Why didn't they just kill ya?
I might be a lesson, a warning.
Somebody wants to offer me a job, but they want me desperate before they make the offer.
It could be a lot of things. I don't know.
Yeah. It'll be good for you to stay in one place for a while, resolve some issues.
Why I-I traveled halfway across the world to get away from those, you know...
My point exactly.
Maybe if you stopped running, you could maintain a normal relationship.
Listen, Fi. There's a few things I'm good at.
Tactical analysis, hand-to-hand combat, and I'm a decent cook.
But relationships... They're just not my thing. They never were.
Well, now you're in Miami.
Get yourself a 24-year-old with big, fake tits.
They bore me.
If it makes you feel any better,
you were the closest... I ever got.
It... It just wasn't close enough, I guess.
Things could have worked out with us, Michael.
You were robbing banks for the I.R.A.
A spy is just a criminal with a government paycheck.
You're the one with two F.B.I. agents watching him eat.
Three... One.
Two.
Behind me at the bar.
Bravo.
- Should we shoot them? - I've got enough problems.
Oh, well. More sake then?
- When. When, Fi. When! When. - What? What? What?
I can't shag a man who works in a bank.
The end. He was rich, he's handsome, and you broke up with him.
He had no tactical awareness.
He didn't know how to shoot.
He didn't know how many exits were in a building.
Oh, God! You spoiled me, Mi... Michael.
I thought it was my winning smile.
Don't move.
Sugar wants you out.
- She has nothing to do with this. - Shut up.
He's right. Michael, shut up.
I can handle myself.
You really ought to do something about your neighbors.
I know, I know. That was fun.
Yeah. Shall we?
Yo, Fi, Fi.
Violence is foreplay for you. It's not for me.
I gotta take care of this, and then I gotta go to bed.
Good night. I'll see you tomorrow.
Fi, you know, I could...
That went well.
Yeah. Sam. You'll like this.
I found out Vince is calling all his army buddies, trying to figure out who you are.
Yeah, good luck with that. I don't even know.
I'll have 'em feed him something, hold him off.
Well, stay on it. I have a little home improvement project I have to do.
Once somebody sends a guy with a gun after you,
things are only going to get worse.
But like it or not, you've got work to do.
For a job like getting rid of the drug dealer next door,
I'll take a hardware store over a gun any day.
Guns make you stupid. Better to fight your wars with duct tape.
Duct tape makes you smart.
Every decent punk has a bulletproof door.
Who's there?
Hi. It's your neighbor.
But people forget walls are just plaster.
Hopefully, you get him with the first shot.
Or the second.
My knee! No!
Come on inside!
Now he's down and waiting for you to come through the front door.
Come on, mother...
So you don't come through the front door.
- Come on! - Don't move. Easy, Vanilla Ice.
Now, you got 20 minutes to clear out. You understand? Do you understand?
- Yes, yes, yes! - The wound is not that bad.
Disinfect it, wrap it in this, and you get to a hospital, you won't walk with a limp.
You're still here in 20 minutes, the limp will be the least of your problems. Understand me?
Yes.
Look, the point is, you getting burned wouldn't have happened back then.
I mean, in the '80s, the rules were the rules.
They had their guys, we had our guys.
Wasn't so goddamn complicated. You could get your head around it.
Now today it's all about religion and oil.
It's no fun anymore. I gotta tell you, I'm glad I got out when I did.
Good morning, Bloody Mary. Hey, you want some?
No, I'm fine.
Hey, is that your mom again? Yup.
All right. There she is. Pyne's coming out soon.
You sure this is a good idea... You hooking up with her again?
Okay, I'm not hooking up with her. That's not what's happening.
I need her for tactical support.
Is that what they're calling it these days? Tactical support?
What about your cab driver? Is he gonna let me down?
Pierre? Don't worry about him. I told him I'd give him 50 bucks to punch me in the face.
That's all he had to hear. Yeah, I'd do it for 20.
I don't want any excuses. Now, you're my damn attorney.
I want to know what I can do about this situation. Hey!
- What the hell was that? - Oh, what is that?
- You cut me off! - You drive two lanes! You drive in one.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no. There are two lanes!
You got a mouth. You got a problem here?
Yeah, I got a problem with you!
Okay. Okay. Okay, okay. Okay.
This man. Hey, I'm not through with you, man!
I'm callin'! You got...
I got no problem!
I got your number! Huh?
So the bastard just comes out of nowhere,
breaks into my house, into my safe.
You can't tell me a damn thing about him? We're tryin', sir.
There you go, Mike. Less than a week in Miami, you're already making friends.
It doesn't sound like he's gonna roll over that easy.
These rich guys bite when you got 'em by the tail.
Call me if he makes any moves. We'll get about 24 hours out of that battery.
It's voice-activated, so you'll hear a beep. I know the drill, Mike.
You do your thing.
People with happy families don't become spies.
A bad childhood is the perfect background for covert ops.
You don't trust anyone.
You're used to getting smacked around, and you never get homesick.
I think I've got a parasite.
You don't have a parasite.
Pills don't work. Soon as it reaches your liver, it's...
The pills are for you not to think you're sick all the time.
Yeah, right. You and the doctor, you think I'm crazy.
I think he's letting me die of a parasite 'cause I can't pay his bill.
Oh, for now, can we just try these pills?
- I put up the tree. - Yeah, I can see that.
Did you go see your brother yet?
'Cause, um, I thought maybe we could all be, you know, together for Christmas.
But he's not returning my calls.
The last time I saw him, he threw a telephone book at my head.
So what makes you think I can make him come home?
Well, remember when you were six, and-and Daddy locked you in your room...
and wouldn't let you see the Star Wars movie?
Well, you just pulled up the floor and sneaked out through the heating vent.
I mean, since when was there ever anything that you wanted to do that you couldn't do?
Please, Michael. For me.
Thirty years of karate,
combat experience on five continents,
a rating with every weapon that shoots a bullet or holds an edge.
Still haven't found any defense against Mom crying into my shirt.
Mom, I, uh... I c... I can't 'cause I... I... I'm gonna... I'm...
Hold on. I'm sorry. Hold on. Yeah?
We got trouble, Mike. Well, what is it?
Looks like Pyne is trying to get some leverage of his own. Listen.
Vincent, you're gonna have to go over and take the kid.
I don't know what the hell else to do.
Maybe then we can talk some sense into Javier. Jesus, the kid.
Pyne got Javier out of the house. He had his lawyer call with some legal thing.
Now the kid is home alone, and your boy Vince is on his way over there.
How long ago? I called as soon as I heard, brother.
Mom, where's your toolbox?
- You're about to get ran over. - Move over.
Man, damn. Please don't jack me. Move over. Move over.
All right. All right. No, no. This is not a carjacking.
Don't... Don't jack me. It's not a carjacking. I'm not gonna hurt you.
- I just need a big car with no air bags. - You need a what?
Where are you taking me? We're gonna go to Little Havana for a bit.
Little Havana? Just let me out. I'll get out. I'll forget I ever seen you.
I don't have time to drop you off now.
Oh, watch out for that car!
You gotta get this fixed. This is really annoying.
I just need to do something real quick. What do you need to do?
All right. All right, man. Slow down. Slow down, all right?
It's almost over, okay? What does "almost over" mean?
You know, uh, there's a lot of cops around this area, dude.
- Sheaun, hold on really tight. - Why do I have to hold on tight?
- Because... - Because?
Of this.
Look what you did to my car!
Oh, damn! Look at my car.
Air bags save a lot of lives.
But they also put you out long enough...
to get your hands cable-tied to the steering wheel.
I just had this fixed! Don't go playin' with my car, man!
Sheaun, there's cash in his wallet. The Rolex should take care of the rest.
Cops will be here soon. I'd be someplace else.
How am I gonna get home?
What's up?
Yeah, he's fine. Do you have a place to stay?
Great.
You'll come get him? Good.
David, your dad will be here soon.
You two are gonna stay with your aunt for a while.
You live here?
I usually stay at four-star hotels.
I mean, I don't really have a lot of... stuff.
If you're hungry, there's a blueberry yogurt in the fridge.
That black eye... How'd you get it?
Kids at school.
Yeah? Why?
I don't know. They don't need a reason mostly.
Last time, they took my new shoes.
Time before, it was just 'cause.
How many were there? Is it a group or an individual?
It matters, tactically.
It's a group. They get up in my face and they start pounding me, okay?
Are you crying?
You're not crying?
Looks like you're crying. Don't, okay?
All right. Don't cry.
All right. Stop. All right? Here.
You have to lose some fights so you can learn to win.
I mean, look at this.
I got the crap beat out of me. I have two black belts, and they kicked my ass.
So you got nothing to be ashamed of with me, okay?
I mean, I'm the champ at gettin' beaten up.
But I'm also very good at winning. You want it to stop?
Yeah. All right.
The key to fighting a group is taking out its leader.
Take out its leader, oh, they'll all leave you alone. It's bully psychology.
Works with third world military units as well. When I was in Afghanistan...
Never mind that. Um, who's the leader?
- His name's Jake. - Jake?
I'm gonna push you.
When I do that, drop down into a ball, like you're scared.
Protect yourself. Tight up like a ball. Good.
Now, he's gonna move in and make fun of you. Keep those elbows tight.
He tries to kick you, protect that spleen, protect that liver.
I want you to stand up quick, hit your head right up underneath my chin.
And go!
I'm a little dazed. Make your fist.
One, two, three, four, and then the five. That locks it in.
Very good. Good.
Guys, it's like I told you. There's nothing else. We did the one job, and that's it.
About the threatening package? You may not take that seriously, but the terror task force...
Oh, come on, guys! He was just making a point.
We're not here for our health, Sam.
Hi, guys. Talking about me? Can I get a coffee?
Sam. Hey, Mike.
You want to introduce me to your F.B.I. buddies?
- F.B.I.? You got the wrong idea. - Ford outside has G-series plates.
You got fast-draw holsters, off-the-rack suits and cheap loafers.
No, you guys are feds. They're feds!
Michael, look. They came to me. I was just trying to help you.
It's not like I didn't know. I've got two known associates in Miami... you and Lucy...
And amazingly, you're both willing to help me?
I know how the game is played, Sam. I was on the other side, remember?
So, I'm Michael Westen, and you are?
Agent Harris. This is Agent Lane.
Do you even know why you're following me? 'Cause this whole thing...
Don't know, don't care. Higher up the food chain.
Great. Let's call your boss. Maybe he can tell me.
Those aren't our orders. Our orders are to keep tabs on you.
- Then you give him a message. You tell him... - Sorry.
I do have a message for you though.
Don't go thinking you got nothin' to lose.
You got friends, you got family.
Is that a threat, Agent Harris?
It's the truth. Coffee's on me.
- Mike, they got my pension tied up. - Sam, Sam.
Look, they said it would be better for you, that you can do anything you want basically,
as long as you stay where they can see you and you don't 'cause any trouble.
Sam, don't sprinkle sugar on this bull and call it candy.
I'm sorry, Mike. I don't know what to say.
If I couldn't handle my friends informing on me, I wouldn't be in the business.
The way I see it, better a friend than someone I don't know.
The way I see it,
a friend would tell them just enough to make them happy,
but keep 'em out of my business.
Well, hell, yeah, Mike. Absolutely.
Good. Good. I gotta go. I gotta go take care of Pyne.
- You want me to come along? It's the least I can do.
No. I can handle it.
Good luck, Mike.
When you work solo, it's about prepping the ground.
Home court advantage counts for a lot.
You never know what's going to happen. You prepare for everything.
Most bad guys expect you to just sit there and wait for them...
like those are the rules or something.
Hello. Hello. Who's this?
He's there.
Hi there.
- Where is he? - Uh, Javier?
He's not here. Listen, we need to talk.
I'm not screwing around. Where the hell is he?
He's not here.
Anything you need to say to him, you can say to me.
I'm done talking, Mr. Westen.
I don't know how in the hell you got in my safe, but I want to make it clear...
- I will not be intimidated. - Well, neither will I.
By the way, Vince, you're gonna have a hard time blowing my brains out with the safety on.
Whoa! Hey, the safety was off. What do you know? My mistake.
Vince, what the hell?
If you're going to put prints on a gun,
sticking it into somebody's hand isn't going to do it.
Any decent lawyer can explain prints on a gun. Ow, ow!
But try explaining prints on the inside of the trigger assembly.
Who...
Who was doing all the shooting? We have a special guest.
This bad boy.
.357 Magnum loaded with blanks, duct taped to a flare.
Sounded like the real thing, didn't it?
- I need a hospital. - Yeah, in a sec. We're talking.
You shot your buddy here, Mr. Pyne.
And this... This...
This here is a crime lab's wet dream.
What do you want?
In a second. I'm not done with my show-and-tell.
Vincent, you're gonna have to go over and take the kid.
I don't know what the hell else to do.
That is you plotting a kidnapping. That's hard time, federal time.
- At your age, that's the rest of your life. - Tell me what you want!
Vince here confesses to the robbery.
Javier gets severance pay, five years, with benefits... and dental.
That's very important. And never sees your mug again.
And you know what? For Christmas, throw in a college fund for David.
How does that sound? Well, let's get you outta here.
This will be a murder weapon in 20 minutes if Vince doesn't get to the hospital.
And the documents... The financial information?
We'll see how good of a boy you are.
'Cause I'll be watching.
I cleaned up your place pretty well, but you're gonna have to replace the carpet.
But no one's gonna bother you or your family again. You can go home.
Thank you. I don't... I don't know how to say, but...
Don't worry about it.
Come on!
- Yeah? - Can I borrow your binoculars?
I know you got some in there and you're not using them...
because you need 'em to see me, and I'm right here, so...
Please?
Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!
As a spy, it doesn't matter...
if you're helping rebel forces fight off a dictator...
or giving combat tips to a third-grader.
There's nothing like helping the little guy kick some bully's ass.
Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!
There's nothing worse for a spook than knowing you're being played.
Someone is pulling strings.
Who? Not some intelligence agency bureaucrat in a cubicle.
This is someone with more style.
Not F.B.I. either.
They're not this creative and they don't do surveillance on their own guys.
This is someone who knows what he's doing,
someone who wants to send a message.
"Welcome to Miami."