1 00:00:06,080 --> 00:00:08,401 - Brenan, did you fart in here? - No. 2 00:00:08,480 --> 00:00:09,766 - It stinks. - No... No... 3 00:00:09,840 --> 00:00:11,842 - You got a stinky ass. - No, I don't. 4 00:00:11,920 --> 00:00:13,843 You're a bad boy! 5 00:00:13,920 --> 00:00:16,127 Fuck me! 6 00:00:16,560 --> 00:00:18,085 Shit! 7 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:21,204 (SIGHS) I feel so much better. 8 00:00:21,280 --> 00:00:22,520 I went potty. 9 00:00:22,600 --> 00:00:25,171 - Are we ready? - Yeah. I got everything loaded in. 10 00:00:25,240 --> 00:00:26,651 - Kids are strapped together. - Good. 11 00:00:26,720 --> 00:00:28,688 - Got a bottle of water for you. - Okay. 12 00:00:28,760 --> 00:00:30,000 Honey, what is that on your face? 13 00:00:30,600 --> 00:00:31,601 What? 14 00:00:31,680 --> 00:00:33,648 That mark, is that a bruise? 15 00:00:33,760 --> 00:00:34,886 I don't know. I don't know. 16 00:00:34,960 --> 00:00:36,803 - Did someone hit you? - No. 17 00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:38,850 No, nobody hit me. 18 00:00:38,920 --> 00:00:40,365 Okay. So I'm crazy? 19 00:00:40,440 --> 00:00:43,205 There's a bruise on your jaw. Who did this to you? 20 00:00:43,280 --> 00:00:46,011 - Gene! - It's nobody. 21 00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:48,924 Fine, I'll count to three. One. 22 00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:50,684 Two. 23 00:00:50,760 --> 00:00:51,727 Come on. 24 00:00:51,800 --> 00:00:53,882 - All right, now... All right, that's okay. It's... - Two and a half. 25 00:00:53,960 --> 00:00:55,564 Okay, Kenny Powers. 26 00:00:55,640 --> 00:00:56,721 Kenny did this? 27 00:00:56,800 --> 00:00:58,040 - Yeah. We were... - Are you being bullied? 28 00:00:58,160 --> 00:01:00,845 No, we were singing and rapping and we were playing... 29 00:01:00,920 --> 00:01:02,604 Doing a scene from Rocky and he knocked me out. 30 00:01:02,680 --> 00:01:05,081 You were doing a scene from Rocky and he hit you? 31 00:01:05,160 --> 00:01:06,844 For... As a joke, yeah. 32 00:01:06,960 --> 00:01:09,088 No, I don't think so. 33 00:01:09,160 --> 00:01:10,127 I'm gonna call April. 34 00:01:10,200 --> 00:01:11,406 - No, no. Hey, no, no. - I can clear this up. 35 00:01:11,480 --> 00:01:13,847 - Do not talk to April, okay? Hey! - I will talk to April if I want. 36 00:01:13,920 --> 00:01:14,921 I will handle this. 37 00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:16,570 - I'd love to see that. - I can, all right? 38 00:01:16,680 --> 00:01:18,250 - Can you handle it, Gene? - Yes. Yes! I can handle it! 39 00:01:18,320 --> 00:01:21,005 - Now will you just let it go? - Okay. 40 00:01:21,080 --> 00:01:23,731 For now, I will let it go, all right? Let's go. 41 00:01:24,520 --> 00:01:26,488 We have to stop at the gas station. 42 00:01:27,360 --> 00:01:28,521 I'm all out of pads. 43 00:01:35,880 --> 00:01:39,327 In most of nature, the alpha is the strongest of the pack, 44 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:44,281 a creature of immense strength, large in size, a leader from birth. 45 00:01:44,360 --> 00:01:46,488 Hippos, bumblebees, Wayans brothers. 46 00:01:46,560 --> 00:01:49,245 Most of the time, they just look to the biggest amongst them. 47 00:01:49,320 --> 00:01:51,129 But not all alphas are born, children. 48 00:01:51,200 --> 00:01:52,964 Some animals become great. 49 00:01:53,040 --> 00:01:57,284 They use their mind, they form respect, they build alliances. 50 00:01:57,360 --> 00:02:00,443 Your father has recently used this technique to stunning effect. 51 00:02:00,520 --> 00:02:02,090 It is now your turn, my son. 52 00:02:02,160 --> 00:02:03,924 Feed his desires. 53 00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:05,729 Give Dakota this chicken chow mein. 54 00:02:07,120 --> 00:02:08,201 (WOLF GROWLS) 55 00:02:08,640 --> 00:02:09,641 There you go. 56 00:02:09,720 --> 00:02:11,210 Don't be scared, Toby. No fear. 57 00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:13,565 You are his master. 58 00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:16,323 Toby, God damn it. He ain't gonna be able to reach that. 59 00:02:16,400 --> 00:02:19,722 And that's not even feeding him. You're cock-teasing him. 60 00:02:19,800 --> 00:02:22,485 COMMENTATOR: It's the ultimate Sports Sesh Double Dog Challenge, 61 00:02:22,560 --> 00:02:25,166 and right now it looks like it's come down to a two-man race 62 00:02:25,240 --> 00:02:27,129 and now it's the breakfast of champions. 63 00:02:27,200 --> 00:02:30,921 The apple pie whip cream followed by downing a can of beer. 64 00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:33,731 Here comes Kenny Powers through the birth canal. 65 00:02:33,840 --> 00:02:37,003 It looks like it's gonna be Jed Forney and Guy Young 66 00:02:37,080 --> 00:02:38,923 in a dead heat around the baseball bat spin. 67 00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:40,843 Powers is bidding up. 68 00:02:40,920 --> 00:02:43,048 Jimmy Clay with a can of beer. 69 00:02:43,600 --> 00:02:45,967 Now atop the balance beam... 70 00:02:46,040 --> 00:02:48,202 And down goes Guy Young! 71 00:02:48,280 --> 00:02:50,681 Jed Forney on his way to the pyramid. 72 00:02:50,760 --> 00:02:52,489 Three steps to the top! 73 00:02:52,560 --> 00:02:54,244 Two! One! He's there! 74 00:02:54,360 --> 00:02:57,045 He reaches for the flag! He's won! 75 00:02:57,120 --> 00:02:58,121 - (BELL CLANGING) - (CROWD CHEERING) 76 00:02:58,240 --> 00:02:59,651 Grabs the orange flag! 77 00:02:59,720 --> 00:03:01,961 - Jed Forney is winner of... - Nice work! 78 00:03:02,040 --> 00:03:05,010 ...the ultimate Sports Sesh Double Dog Challenge! 79 00:03:06,120 --> 00:03:07,201 Good race, man! 80 00:03:07,280 --> 00:03:10,363 We'll be back with more of Sports Sesh, right after this. 81 00:03:12,320 --> 00:03:13,970 Stupid, stupid, stupid. 82 00:03:14,040 --> 00:03:15,530 - What the fuck were you thinking about? - I don't... 83 00:03:15,600 --> 00:03:16,681 How you gonna beat Guy Young on his own show? 84 00:03:16,800 --> 00:03:18,040 Fuck! 85 00:03:18,120 --> 00:03:19,645 I'm so stupid! 86 00:03:19,760 --> 00:03:20,727 Just an idiot! 87 00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:21,881 You guys are hilarious. 88 00:03:21,960 --> 00:03:23,849 Do you really think Guy Young's gonna be upset with you 89 00:03:23,920 --> 00:03:25,888 'cause you beat him on a silly little obstacle course? 90 00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:27,564 - You don't know Guy Young. - Excuse me. 91 00:03:27,640 --> 00:03:29,802 I played baseball with the motherfucker. I think I know Guy Young. 92 00:03:29,880 --> 00:03:32,167 - This ain't baseball. - JED: That was a long time ago, Kenny. 93 00:03:32,240 --> 00:03:34,049 Guy's the sorest loser there is. 94 00:03:34,120 --> 00:03:35,724 He throws a damn fit. 95 00:03:35,800 --> 00:03:37,564 Ask Dontel if you don't believe me. 96 00:03:37,640 --> 00:03:40,723 An ex embittered employee. I'm sure he's a great judge of character. 97 00:03:41,080 --> 00:03:43,560 Well, ask Rodney. He ain't no trash-talker. Tell him. 98 00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:44,641 Tell him, Rodney. 99 00:03:44,720 --> 00:03:46,131 He can be fucked up. 100 00:03:46,200 --> 00:03:47,884 - Yup. - Come on, man. 101 00:03:47,960 --> 00:03:50,406 You and I are show-mates, dude. I got your back. 102 00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:52,721 - I'll make sure nobody fucks with you. - JED: Thanks, Kenny. 103 00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:54,484 That means a lot. 104 00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:58,288 - KP! - Saved you a seat, homeboy. 105 00:03:58,360 --> 00:03:59,407 (BOTH LAUGH) 106 00:03:59,480 --> 00:04:01,403 KP has found his niche. 107 00:04:01,480 --> 00:04:03,369 He is hysterical out there. 108 00:04:03,440 --> 00:04:04,805 - They're loving you, my man. - Yeah, dog. 109 00:04:04,880 --> 00:04:06,928 I'm loving my stage charisma. 110 00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:08,650 Well, I like it, too. I like it, too. 111 00:04:08,720 --> 00:04:10,245 I'm glad you're here, KP. 112 00:04:10,320 --> 00:04:11,765 I don't want to sound weird, Guy, 113 00:04:11,840 --> 00:04:17,165 but I mean, you're just fastly becoming my very best friend, dude. 114 00:04:17,680 --> 00:04:19,409 I don't just throw that around. 115 00:04:19,480 --> 00:04:22,051 You know, I had a very best friend. 116 00:04:22,120 --> 00:04:24,361 He passed away suddenly. Overdose of cocaine. 117 00:04:24,440 --> 00:04:26,044 He was all alone by himself in his apartment. 118 00:04:26,680 --> 00:04:29,251 After my experiences with Shay-dog, 119 00:04:29,320 --> 00:04:32,529 I never thought I'd have a very best friend like him again. 120 00:04:32,600 --> 00:04:34,762 Best friends are very cool to be. 121 00:04:34,840 --> 00:04:37,730 Fuckin' very best friends are fuckin' dope to be. 122 00:04:37,800 --> 00:04:39,962 - What are you doing this weekend? - Me? 123 00:04:40,040 --> 00:04:41,929 I need to check my PalmPilot, but I think I'm just chilling. 124 00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:43,604 Yeah? I'm hosting a charity event. 125 00:04:43,720 --> 00:04:45,370 It's the Dragon Boat Classic. 126 00:04:46,200 --> 00:04:47,281 Ooh, Dragon Boat. 127 00:04:47,360 --> 00:04:50,125 That sounds like that may be Asian in origin. Am I correct? 128 00:04:50,200 --> 00:04:51,326 So it is. 129 00:04:51,400 --> 00:04:54,483 So what do you say? You want to go into battle with me, KP? Huh? 130 00:04:54,560 --> 00:04:55,891 You want to be on my road team? 131 00:04:55,960 --> 00:04:57,041 Because of my martial arts training, 132 00:04:57,120 --> 00:04:59,521 my muscles are attuned to excel at oriental activities. 133 00:04:59,600 --> 00:05:01,807 - How much does it pay? - No, we don't get paid. 134 00:05:01,880 --> 00:05:03,245 It's charity work, Kenny. 135 00:05:03,320 --> 00:05:06,563 All you gotta do is pick the charity of your choice and we're good to go. 136 00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:07,971 Look, I'm not gonna be crazy, all right? 137 00:05:08,040 --> 00:05:11,408 I'll take this friendship slow, but you've really turned my life around. 138 00:05:11,480 --> 00:05:13,801 The least I can do is join you in this charitable battle. 139 00:05:13,880 --> 00:05:14,881 I love it! 140 00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:16,441 Okay, come on! 141 00:05:16,920 --> 00:05:18,046 (EXCLAIMS EXCITEDLY) 142 00:05:21,440 --> 00:05:23,010 Ten seconds to blast off. 143 00:05:26,080 --> 00:05:27,491 It's gonna be so awesome. 144 00:05:28,520 --> 00:05:29,851 (TIRES SCREECHING) (RAP MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO) 145 00:05:29,920 --> 00:05:30,887 Stevie. 146 00:05:30,960 --> 00:05:32,007 This isn't playtime. 147 00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:34,447 I'd love to discuss something with you ASAP. 148 00:05:35,400 --> 00:05:37,323 - (CHILDREN CLAMORING) - I need you to find me a charity 149 00:05:37,440 --> 00:05:39,727 that I can represent for this goddamn Dragon Boat shit I got going on. 150 00:05:39,800 --> 00:05:41,290 - (GLASS SHATTERS) - Shut up! 151 00:05:41,400 --> 00:05:43,482 - The fuck? - Sorry about my kids. 152 00:05:43,560 --> 00:05:45,528 I just realized that I cannot control them. 153 00:05:45,600 --> 00:05:47,409 Stevie, I need you to fucking focus up, all right? 154 00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:48,845 I just need you to come up with a goddamn good cause 155 00:05:48,920 --> 00:05:49,921 I can put my name on. 156 00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:51,923 I need something fucking dope and I need it quick. 157 00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:53,525 Now I know you got a one-track mind right now, 158 00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:56,285 so don't be coming at me with some Save the Limp Dick Foundation. 159 00:05:56,360 --> 00:05:58,328 That was what I was gonna say, "Save the Limp Dick." 160 00:05:58,400 --> 00:06:01,563 Speaking of, I went to the dick doctor today, 161 00:06:01,640 --> 00:06:05,850 and he said that my problem is 100% mental. 162 00:06:05,920 --> 00:06:09,049 - So? That's a positive, right? - No! Obviously not! 163 00:06:09,120 --> 00:06:10,326 Because if it was physical, 164 00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:13,961 you could unclog a tube and then I could get back to everyday lovemaking. 165 00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:15,087 Scientifically speaking, 166 00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:17,891 what's probably going on here with the fucking downstairs business 167 00:06:17,960 --> 00:06:20,281 is your boner muscles are looking at yourself in the mirror 168 00:06:20,400 --> 00:06:21,561 and they're saying, "Jesus Christ! 169 00:06:21,640 --> 00:06:25,167 "There's no way in hell that any woman is ever gonna fucking let me pump her." 170 00:06:25,280 --> 00:06:26,805 That makes sense, Kenny. 171 00:06:26,880 --> 00:06:29,963 I mean, you put zero to no effort into your personal appearance. 172 00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:32,566 I mean, maybe try spending more than 6 bucks on a haircut, you know? 173 00:06:32,640 --> 00:06:34,563 Buy shirts that aren't fucking plum colored. 174 00:06:34,640 --> 00:06:35,766 You don't like plum? 175 00:06:35,840 --> 00:06:37,888 Let the dick guide you, all right? 176 00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:39,570 The dick knows what it wants to wear. 177 00:06:39,640 --> 00:06:41,449 And right now, the dick wants to be a hunk. 178 00:06:41,520 --> 00:06:43,841 New clothes, new wardrobe, new Stevie. 179 00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:44,961 Mmm-hmm. 180 00:06:45,160 --> 00:06:46,810 The dick wants to be a hunk. 181 00:06:46,880 --> 00:06:47,927 (WOLF BARKS) 182 00:06:48,000 --> 00:06:49,764 Aw, yeah, that's right. 183 00:06:49,840 --> 00:06:51,968 Look at you sexy motherfuckers. 184 00:06:52,040 --> 00:06:54,008 Ooh, so sweaty, so raw, so real. 185 00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:55,923 Oh, yeah, Dutch angles. 186 00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:58,810 Rule of thirds up in here. 187 00:06:58,880 --> 00:07:01,281 That's some Amores Perros right there, motherfucker. 188 00:07:01,360 --> 00:07:05,445 I want you all to pretend that you're digging up the ancient city of El Dorado. 189 00:07:05,520 --> 00:07:08,490 And once you find these jewels and treasures, it will save your entire village. 190 00:07:08,560 --> 00:07:10,210 - Kenny! - KENNY: Hey, wheelbarrow one! 191 00:07:10,280 --> 00:07:13,204 Pretend like there's a chupacabra chasing your ass. 192 00:07:13,280 --> 00:07:15,203 - There you go. Faster. - APRIL: Baby... 193 00:07:15,840 --> 00:07:19,208 Has Gene and Tel been weird to you at all? 194 00:07:20,080 --> 00:07:21,650 No, just boring as usual. 195 00:07:21,720 --> 00:07:26,248 I found out that they had spaghetti night without us on Wednesday. 196 00:07:26,320 --> 00:07:28,766 How could they do that? I mean, we practically invented spaghetti night. 197 00:07:28,840 --> 00:07:30,808 Viv let it slip. 198 00:07:31,600 --> 00:07:34,285 APRIL: I swear something's going on with them. 199 00:07:34,360 --> 00:07:36,408 Well, you know, I didn't want to say anything, 200 00:07:36,480 --> 00:07:38,289 but Gene has been fibbing like a motherfucker lately. 201 00:07:38,360 --> 00:07:39,327 Like what? 202 00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:41,607 Like making up lies about people's relationships. 203 00:07:41,680 --> 00:07:43,967 Just kind of out of the blue with, like, nothing to base it on. 204 00:07:44,040 --> 00:07:45,644 - Oh, my God. - Yeah, like, the other day, 205 00:07:45,720 --> 00:07:47,722 he was coming to me talking about Tel, 206 00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:52,328 saying how Tel's, like, been going online doing Chatroulette trying to get dick sucks. 207 00:07:52,400 --> 00:07:53,606 - It's like, "Tel?" - What? 208 00:07:53,680 --> 00:07:56,365 He, like, loves his wife, and he doesn't even know how to use Chatroulette. 209 00:07:56,440 --> 00:07:59,887 That makes me just question, like, maybe Gene's not that happy in his own marriage. 210 00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:01,411 Well, he's with Dixie. 211 00:08:01,480 --> 00:08:03,005 - Gross, huh? - You know what? 212 00:08:03,080 --> 00:08:06,846 I think that she was very judgey about my drinking at the water park. 213 00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:08,081 Oh, my God. 214 00:08:08,160 --> 00:08:09,605 - What? - I just figured it out. 215 00:08:09,680 --> 00:08:10,841 What? 216 00:08:11,440 --> 00:08:14,967 I bet, because you were drinking, you probably somehow offended her, 217 00:08:15,040 --> 00:08:16,804 and now she's trying to turn that shit against you, 218 00:08:16,880 --> 00:08:18,644 isolate us out in the goddamn neighborhood and pull this! 219 00:08:18,720 --> 00:08:19,960 I knew it. Fuck them? 220 00:08:20,040 --> 00:08:21,644 - Fuck them! - Yeah. 221 00:08:21,720 --> 00:08:23,324 Look at all the wonderful things happen for us. 222 00:08:23,440 --> 00:08:26,046 We're rich as fuck, we got a goddamn army of workers here. 223 00:08:26,120 --> 00:08:28,691 - We're happier than we've ever been, right? - Mmm-hmm. 224 00:08:28,760 --> 00:08:29,807 You see this one right here? 225 00:08:29,920 --> 00:08:31,809 You see that little brooch on Titi's neck there? 226 00:08:31,880 --> 00:08:33,245 That used to belong to your great-grandmother. 227 00:08:33,320 --> 00:08:36,529 I used it as an incentive yesterday for the workers to see who could do the best work, 228 00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:37,761 and he won. 229 00:08:37,840 --> 00:08:40,286 Titi dug the most. 230 00:08:48,080 --> 00:08:49,650 - I'm thinking I probably get it. - No, you could do it. 231 00:08:49,720 --> 00:08:52,041 - If I get enough loft, I get it over that bunker. - No, no, that's... 232 00:08:52,120 --> 00:08:53,610 If you can do the bounce. 233 00:08:53,760 --> 00:08:55,842 (HEAVY METAL MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO) 234 00:08:59,200 --> 00:09:00,201 (MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY) 235 00:09:00,280 --> 00:09:01,691 What's the word, Mean Gene? 236 00:09:01,760 --> 00:09:03,489 How's that jaw feeling, slugger? 237 00:09:04,320 --> 00:09:06,641 You didn't punch me that hard, so it doesn't hurt that bad. 238 00:09:07,040 --> 00:09:08,963 (LAUGHING) Fucking pussy. 239 00:09:09,040 --> 00:09:10,769 Look, I know shit got out of hand the other night. 240 00:09:10,840 --> 00:09:11,921 We all got a little crazy. 241 00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:15,129 Drugs, sex, incest. 242 00:09:15,240 --> 00:09:17,242 All right, let's just relive the whole evening, Tel. 243 00:09:17,320 --> 00:09:18,560 I was there, motherfucker, all right? 244 00:09:18,640 --> 00:09:19,766 I know what happened. And guess what? 245 00:09:19,840 --> 00:09:23,811 I also saw some suspicious and provocative behaviors on your half, too, 246 00:09:23,880 --> 00:09:25,405 and I can talk about those if I wanted to. 247 00:09:25,480 --> 00:09:27,926 What are you talking about, man? We didn't do anything. 248 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:30,731 Yeah, I know. That's what I'm saying, dude, and neither did I. 249 00:09:30,840 --> 00:09:31,921 No one did anything. 250 00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:33,764 - So let's just drop it. - Fine. Good. 251 00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:36,764 I know you and Dixie been having little spaghetti nights and not inviting us. 252 00:09:36,840 --> 00:09:39,286 Yeah, so what? I don't give a fuck, all right? 253 00:09:39,360 --> 00:09:42,443 But you hurt April's feelings, and that shit don't fly with me. 254 00:09:42,560 --> 00:09:45,325 Let's leave the spouses out of it. 255 00:09:45,400 --> 00:09:47,243 - Do you hear me? - Okay. 256 00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:49,607 - Leave the fucking spouses out of it! - All right, dude! Chill! 257 00:09:50,400 --> 00:09:52,482 - Now you, Tel. - I'm sorry. 258 00:09:52,560 --> 00:09:54,130 Got any fucking change? 259 00:09:54,200 --> 00:09:55,486 - Where's your fucking change at? - Well, what... 260 00:09:55,560 --> 00:09:57,130 I'm trying to get a pink lemonade in this motherfucker. 261 00:09:57,240 --> 00:09:58,730 - Chill out. - Give me your money. You guys have change? 262 00:09:58,800 --> 00:09:59,847 TEL: No, I got no money on me. 263 00:09:59,920 --> 00:10:02,491 I'll fucking deport you back to Mexico City. 264 00:10:03,280 --> 00:10:04,850 How will you guys play golf without a fucking ball? 265 00:10:04,920 --> 00:10:06,445 Come on. 266 00:10:06,520 --> 00:10:11,082 I never have been so disgusted by two men's behavior. 267 00:10:11,160 --> 00:10:14,050 Leave the spouses out of it, you fucking bullies. 268 00:10:16,840 --> 00:10:18,763 Which clubs are yours, Gene? These red ones? 269 00:10:18,840 --> 00:10:19,966 Yeah, those are mine. That's my TaylorMades. 270 00:10:20,040 --> 00:10:21,041 KENNY: Sweet. 271 00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:22,963 GENE: Hey! 272 00:10:29,560 --> 00:10:30,527 KENNY: God damn, dude. 273 00:10:30,600 --> 00:10:32,648 Why are you taking me onto the set of City of God, man? 274 00:10:32,720 --> 00:10:34,006 This place isn't gentrified for a reason. 275 00:10:34,080 --> 00:10:35,730 Hold on. I think you're gonna like this. 276 00:10:35,800 --> 00:10:37,848 I better like it. The Dragon Boat race is almost here. 277 00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:41,287 It's right here. Check it out. 278 00:10:41,360 --> 00:10:43,601 What the hell is this? All these kids have AIDS or something? 279 00:10:43,680 --> 00:10:45,250 STEVIE: No, they're poor. 280 00:10:45,320 --> 00:10:48,369 You keep them off the hood by teaching them baseball. 281 00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:51,011 Little black kids playing sports isn't a hot button issue. 282 00:10:51,080 --> 00:10:53,162 No one's gonna give a fuck about this at the Dragon Boat race. 283 00:10:53,240 --> 00:10:55,129 Man, I'm going up against some heavy hitters, dude. 284 00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:57,965 AIDS, fucking rain forest, cystic fibrosis. 285 00:10:58,040 --> 00:11:00,691 Don't underestimate the cause. It's got a lot of potential. 286 00:11:00,760 --> 00:11:03,366 Who knows? One of these kids could be the next Babe Ruth. 287 00:11:03,920 --> 00:11:06,082 Well, I wanted the next Rock Hudson or Liberace. 288 00:11:06,160 --> 00:11:09,130 Jesus Christ, Guy Young has AIDS! 289 00:11:09,200 --> 00:11:11,362 Why can't I get AIDS? I want fucking AIDS! 290 00:11:11,480 --> 00:11:13,369 Look, AIDS is harder to get than you think. 291 00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:18,321 Every celebrity with a butthole wants AIDS, but this is not the 1980s. 292 00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:21,085 You can't just sit on a toilet seat and get AIDS. 293 00:11:21,200 --> 00:11:23,487 This, though, everyone loves poor black kids. 294 00:11:23,560 --> 00:11:26,370 Diff'rent Strokes, Dangerous Minds, Urkel. 295 00:11:26,440 --> 00:11:28,602 White guilt, man. Get with the program. 296 00:11:28,680 --> 00:11:31,286 No, I know. Box office returns on Blind Side were huge. 297 00:11:31,360 --> 00:11:35,649 I'm highly disappointed in your efforts here, but I will make it work. 298 00:11:36,920 --> 00:11:39,082 Sorry! I hate when I disappoint you, Kenny. 299 00:11:39,160 --> 00:11:42,721 I'm just all torn up about my fucking dick and balls. 300 00:11:42,800 --> 00:11:43,881 Well, homes, look, man, 301 00:11:43,960 --> 00:11:46,725 it's gonna take more than one polo shirt to change your confidence, all right? 302 00:11:46,800 --> 00:11:48,962 Dude, you're being very nerdy with your clothes picking. 303 00:11:49,040 --> 00:11:51,168 No wonder your dick's not getting hard, dude. 304 00:11:51,240 --> 00:11:52,366 KENNY: It probably can't even breathe in there. 305 00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:54,881 Polyester pleats? You fucking jackass. 306 00:11:54,960 --> 00:11:56,450 I'm sorry I failed you. 307 00:11:56,520 --> 00:11:59,490 The only thing that would make me happy is if all these kids had AIDS. 308 00:12:11,200 --> 00:12:12,247 And to think, 309 00:12:12,320 --> 00:12:14,971 you were sweating spaghetti and meatballs with Gene and Dixie 310 00:12:15,040 --> 00:12:16,405 and now look at your fine ass. 311 00:12:16,480 --> 00:12:18,721 - This is upper class. This is the elite. - Okay. 312 00:12:18,840 --> 00:12:21,241 We need to make sure that they realize that we are one of them. 313 00:12:21,320 --> 00:12:23,243 I need your linguistics to be on point. 314 00:12:23,320 --> 00:12:28,008 Talk about finances, talk about ancient affairs, industrialism. 315 00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:30,242 I need you to be the fucking Bill Reilly with tits in there. 316 00:12:30,320 --> 00:12:31,731 - Okay. - Okay? 317 00:12:32,320 --> 00:12:34,209 Do you have a napkin on you? 318 00:12:36,400 --> 00:12:37,526 Step forward. 319 00:12:39,840 --> 00:12:41,444 Now you're ready to sizzle. 320 00:12:41,520 --> 00:12:43,010 Let's be elite. 321 00:12:55,840 --> 00:12:56,966 Hello, everybody. 322 00:12:57,040 --> 00:12:59,441 - He looks like fucking Neo, doesn't he? - He does. 323 00:12:59,520 --> 00:13:01,090 It's fuckin' cool. 324 00:13:01,160 --> 00:13:05,882 It has been said that the Dragon Boat racers of old were so competitive 325 00:13:05,960 --> 00:13:11,285 that they would strike each other with bamboo in order to drown each other 326 00:13:11,360 --> 00:13:17,322 for the sole purpose of claiming victory for the mighty dragon deity. 327 00:13:17,440 --> 00:13:20,250 I, along with many of my dear friends here... 328 00:13:20,360 --> 00:13:21,521 I see Kenny P. in the house. 329 00:13:21,600 --> 00:13:23,887 - Hey. - Hello. 330 00:13:23,960 --> 00:13:29,251 We're honored to be manning this beautiful vessel for our respective charities, 331 00:13:29,320 --> 00:13:31,084 mine being Guy's AIDS. 332 00:13:31,160 --> 00:13:34,448 - GUY: What's yours again, KP? - Just little black kids. 333 00:13:34,520 --> 00:13:35,567 GUY: Little black kids. 334 00:13:36,760 --> 00:13:40,481 And now, let's officially get the festivities started. 335 00:13:40,560 --> 00:13:42,050 Priest Shen-Quan. 336 00:13:42,120 --> 00:13:43,121 Did I say that correctly? 337 00:13:43,200 --> 00:13:47,524 Shen-Quan will be conducting the awakening of the dragon. 338 00:13:48,960 --> 00:13:51,088 (SINGING IN OTHER LANGUAGE) 339 00:13:53,200 --> 00:13:54,964 (KENNY CHANTING UNDER HIS BREATH) 340 00:13:58,600 --> 00:14:00,841 - The bell's for symbolisms. - Oh. 341 00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:06,001 What he said. 342 00:14:06,080 --> 00:14:07,809 - Let's party. - (ALL CHEERING) 343 00:14:17,840 --> 00:14:20,525 - April, what a pleasure. - It's so flattering. 344 00:14:20,880 --> 00:14:21,881 You're so beautiful. 345 00:14:21,960 --> 00:14:23,291 - Thank you. - She's gorgeous. 346 00:14:23,360 --> 00:14:25,567 April, what do you say us girls go get a drink? 347 00:14:25,640 --> 00:14:26,846 - Okay. - Leave these two to it. 348 00:14:26,920 --> 00:14:27,887 Yes. 349 00:14:27,960 --> 00:14:29,405 Okay. 350 00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:30,647 Wow. 351 00:14:30,840 --> 00:14:32,285 GUY: She is stunning, Kenny. 352 00:14:32,360 --> 00:14:35,648 - How'd you land somebody like that? - I fucked with her head for a while. 353 00:14:35,720 --> 00:14:37,165 - It never fails. - I love it. 354 00:14:37,240 --> 00:14:40,130 Yours is pretty ravishing as well. She looks like that lady from Transformers. 355 00:14:40,200 --> 00:14:42,168 I met her in a bathroom stall. 356 00:14:42,240 --> 00:14:43,651 - Really? - Yeah. 357 00:14:43,720 --> 00:14:45,404 I guess we're both a couple of cocksmen, huh? 358 00:14:45,480 --> 00:14:46,481 Hell, yeah. 359 00:14:46,560 --> 00:14:47,561 - Holla. - JED: Hey! 360 00:14:47,640 --> 00:14:48,607 - KENNY: Holla! - Hey. Oh! 361 00:14:48,680 --> 00:14:50,728 - There he is! - Oh, boy. 362 00:14:50,800 --> 00:14:52,404 Look who's coming. My goodness. 363 00:14:52,480 --> 00:14:54,209 Salt and pepper's here! 364 00:14:54,800 --> 00:14:55,801 - How you doing? - How are you, buddy? 365 00:14:55,880 --> 00:14:57,405 - Good, good. - Good to see you. 366 00:14:57,480 --> 00:14:58,447 - Word. - Good to see you. 367 00:14:58,520 --> 00:14:59,567 - Hi. - Cheryl, how are you? 368 00:14:59,640 --> 00:15:02,041 Hey, my wife here brought her famous peach cobbler. 369 00:15:02,120 --> 00:15:03,246 - I know about that. - Yes, I did. 370 00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:05,721 I told you last time we met I'd bring you some. 371 00:15:05,840 --> 00:15:08,571 I remember, Cheryl, and I'm looking forward to that cobbler. 372 00:15:08,640 --> 00:15:10,722 Why don't you go put it over there by the other baked confections 373 00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:11,881 and I'm gonna dive into it a little later. 374 00:15:11,960 --> 00:15:13,849 - JED: I'll be there in a second. - Wonderful to see you, baby. 375 00:15:13,920 --> 00:15:15,285 Well, you know, I told her 376 00:15:15,360 --> 00:15:18,967 I'd take her down by the water and whisper sweet nothings in her ear. 377 00:15:20,560 --> 00:15:24,121 If I get lucky, she might drop a digit in my bunghole. 378 00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:26,202 - You're talking ass play? Oh, man, boy! - Butthole! 379 00:15:26,320 --> 00:15:28,687 If we're in the water, don't even bother. 380 00:15:28,760 --> 00:15:29,761 That means something's happening. 381 00:15:29,840 --> 00:15:31,649 - Go get 'em, tiger. - Get after it! 382 00:15:33,560 --> 00:15:37,281 Jed Forney. Ugh, God! 383 00:15:37,360 --> 00:15:38,327 What? Forney's all right. 384 00:15:38,400 --> 00:15:39,686 No, he's not, man. 385 00:15:39,760 --> 00:15:43,207 Motherfucking guy's lame and he's dull and he's an ass kiss, 386 00:15:43,280 --> 00:15:44,725 and his wife brings in cobbler? 387 00:15:44,800 --> 00:15:47,610 Like, I got Sweet Lady Jane flown in from LA, you know? 388 00:15:47,680 --> 00:15:49,444 - I'm not gonna eat that bullshit cobbler. - No, I know. 389 00:15:49,520 --> 00:15:53,127 I mean, it's, like, in Tupperware. It's got... The presentation is obviously not up to snuff. 390 00:15:53,200 --> 00:15:55,487 - She reminds me of my little brother. - What does that mean? 391 00:15:55,600 --> 00:15:57,329 His wife, man, looks like a boy 392 00:15:57,400 --> 00:16:03,885 with her little short hair and no tits and the flat ass and little boy legs and short little... 393 00:16:03,960 --> 00:16:06,486 Like a... Boy fingers and... 394 00:16:07,040 --> 00:16:08,530 Like a little Dennis the Menace. 395 00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:09,806 GUY: It's disgusting, man. 396 00:16:09,880 --> 00:16:11,609 GUY: I don't even want to think about them having sex. 397 00:16:11,680 --> 00:16:13,682 All right, I'm gonna have to hobnob with some of the big donors. 398 00:16:13,760 --> 00:16:14,966 - Sure. - I'll catch you later, dude. 399 00:16:15,040 --> 00:16:16,485 All right? Champion. 400 00:16:16,560 --> 00:16:19,404 - Thank you for coming. - Mos def, mos def! 401 00:16:19,480 --> 00:16:20,720 GUY: Champion. 402 00:16:24,920 --> 00:16:27,161 Kemosabe. You're showing brain. 403 00:16:27,240 --> 00:16:30,323 Your scrotum and some of your testicles are leaking out of your diaper there. 404 00:16:32,600 --> 00:16:34,045 STEVIE: Hello, everyone, 405 00:16:34,120 --> 00:16:40,401 and welcome to Kenny Powers' Extra Innings After School Baseball Class! 406 00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:44,810 And now, here is Kenny Powers! 407 00:16:53,160 --> 00:16:54,207 Word. 408 00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:55,520 Fresh. 409 00:16:55,600 --> 00:16:57,250 - Dope. - Paper. 410 00:16:57,320 --> 00:16:58,685 Jams. 411 00:16:58,760 --> 00:16:59,807 Badonkadonks. 412 00:17:00,280 --> 00:17:01,281 KENNY: Straight talk. 413 00:17:02,120 --> 00:17:03,804 That's what we're here for today, you guys. 414 00:17:03,880 --> 00:17:05,086 I know what you guys are thinking. 415 00:17:05,160 --> 00:17:10,405 "Who the hell this cracker think he is, walking up in here, this hookey motherfucker?" 416 00:17:10,480 --> 00:17:12,084 Well, don't be thinking that kind of stuff, guys. 417 00:17:12,160 --> 00:17:13,571 Don't be racist. 418 00:17:13,640 --> 00:17:17,361 'Cause this cracker-ass hookey motherfucker, 419 00:17:17,440 --> 00:17:19,966 from this day forward, is now the face of you guys. 420 00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:25,570 I've chosen to battle on your behalf in the celebrity charity Dragon Boat race. 421 00:17:26,640 --> 00:17:30,964 There's gonna be other causes that, frankly, are way more interesting than you guys. 422 00:17:31,040 --> 00:17:35,728 Things like Lyme's disease and cleft palates in war-torn countries and rain forests. 423 00:17:36,240 --> 00:17:37,890 Breast cancer for teens. 424 00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:39,405 But don't let that scare you, 425 00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:42,848 'cause I'm gonna make a promise to each and every one of you that when I go out there, 426 00:17:42,920 --> 00:17:44,888 I will win. 427 00:17:45,000 --> 00:17:47,606 - Believe dat! - KENNY: Steven, I got this, okay? 428 00:17:48,320 --> 00:17:50,402 I'm here to amend for the atrocities of my ancestors. 429 00:17:50,480 --> 00:17:54,041 You think I'm proud to come from a fucking powdered-wig, wooden-teeth motherfucker? 430 00:17:54,120 --> 00:17:56,248 Fuck, George Washington didn't do shit! 431 00:17:56,320 --> 00:17:59,642 He can suck my fucking dick. I fucking hate that faggot. 432 00:17:59,720 --> 00:18:01,324 That's street talk, y'all. 433 00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:02,731 I hope you all can get where we're coming from. 434 00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:04,370 STEVIE: We're keeping this real! 435 00:18:04,440 --> 00:18:06,920 So look, I'm looking around this fucking baseball park and it sucks. 436 00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:07,967 I get it, man. 437 00:18:08,040 --> 00:18:11,806 There's a goddamn swamp in the outfield, there's a used tampon stuck to second base. 438 00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:16,282 But now that I'm your leader, all that shit's about to change. 439 00:18:16,360 --> 00:18:18,362 I'll crush those other charities of the Dragon Boat race, 440 00:18:18,440 --> 00:18:22,843 and when I do, I will bring back that scrilla, that cash money, and I'll spend it here. 441 00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:24,922 KENNY: We'll get a goddamn brand new couch. 442 00:18:25,040 --> 00:18:30,046 We're gonna change your lives, and I have a feeling that right now, the change has begun. 443 00:18:30,120 --> 00:18:31,121 Hallelujah. 444 00:18:31,200 --> 00:18:32,929 Get ready for victory. 445 00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:35,210 You're with a champion now. 446 00:18:35,520 --> 00:18:38,205 What are you, an audience or an oil painting? 447 00:18:39,200 --> 00:18:41,248 - Respond, please! - Seriously? 448 00:18:41,320 --> 00:18:44,449 Gene and Dixie are having guests over again. I don't get it! 449 00:18:44,560 --> 00:18:45,641 What is their deal? 450 00:18:45,720 --> 00:18:47,290 I have to go over there and see what the problem is. 451 00:18:47,360 --> 00:18:49,328 - I do. - April, don't do it. 452 00:18:49,440 --> 00:18:50,646 You're playing right into their hands. 453 00:18:50,720 --> 00:18:52,449 This is the exact sort of reaction they're hoping for. 454 00:18:52,520 --> 00:18:55,251 Well if they have an issue, Kenny, then they need to fucking spill it. 455 00:18:55,360 --> 00:18:56,964 Yeah, they've ruffled your feathers, I know. 456 00:18:57,040 --> 00:18:58,485 Will you please go with me? 457 00:18:58,560 --> 00:19:00,244 You sure you don't want to just send a text or an email? 458 00:19:00,320 --> 00:19:02,800 - No. That's not gonna work. - Just go over in person. 459 00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:04,689 Kenny, I'm not playing around. 460 00:19:06,960 --> 00:19:09,167 - There he is. Here he comes. - Here. 461 00:19:09,240 --> 00:19:10,651 - Tel, cut the cheese. - There's the big guy. 462 00:19:10,720 --> 00:19:11,846 Here's the platter. 463 00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:12,961 Right. 464 00:19:13,040 --> 00:19:14,371 - You sure it was at the airport? - Hi. 465 00:19:15,040 --> 00:19:16,485 - Hey, Dixie. - Hello. 466 00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:18,881 - Hi, everybody. This won't take long. - Sure. 467 00:19:18,960 --> 00:19:22,328 How have your two dinner parties been in the last two weeks? 468 00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:24,687 I've just... I've seen everybody come over here. 469 00:19:24,760 --> 00:19:26,171 I don't think I got the invitation. 470 00:19:26,240 --> 00:19:27,605 I think it got lost in spam. 471 00:19:27,680 --> 00:19:29,842 I'm sorry, April. I don't know if this is a joke that you're doing. 472 00:19:29,920 --> 00:19:31,126 - This isn't a joke. - It's very passive-aggressive. 473 00:19:31,200 --> 00:19:33,282 This isn't a joke. I'm very angry with you. 474 00:19:33,400 --> 00:19:35,164 - Well... - I'm very upset because I feel left out. 475 00:19:35,240 --> 00:19:36,241 - Okay. - I've been a very good friend to you. 476 00:19:36,360 --> 00:19:37,850 You're a very good friend, but my problem is... 477 00:19:37,920 --> 00:19:39,524 - You know what? I know what it is. - What is that? 478 00:19:39,600 --> 00:19:42,604 You were upset with me for getting drunk at the waterpark in front of the kids. 479 00:19:43,160 --> 00:19:44,366 Yeah, um. 480 00:19:44,440 --> 00:19:47,683 - That's not what I was upset about at all. - Okay, well then what's the problem? 481 00:19:47,760 --> 00:19:50,411 My big problem is your husband. 482 00:19:50,480 --> 00:19:52,960 Your husband punched my husband right in the face. 483 00:19:53,040 --> 00:19:54,530 - Excuse me? - It's true. 484 00:19:54,600 --> 00:19:55,965 He punched me. He hit me right in the mouth. 485 00:19:56,040 --> 00:19:57,041 - Tall tales... That's a... - Please don't lie. 486 00:19:57,120 --> 00:19:58,087 - That's tall tales. - What? 487 00:19:58,160 --> 00:19:59,161 - He says a fabrication. - Ask your husband. 488 00:19:59,240 --> 00:20:00,207 Yes, you did! You hit me in the mouth! 489 00:20:00,280 --> 00:20:01,884 Don't sit here and say I punched you in the face... 490 00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:03,325 - One at a time! - ...and sit here and lie about this! 491 00:20:03,400 --> 00:20:04,890 - What has happened? - You punched me right in the mouth! 492 00:20:04,960 --> 00:20:06,644 One at a time in this house! 493 00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:08,722 - We speak one at a time. - Okay, fine. 494 00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:10,040 Shut up, Gene. I'll talk. 495 00:20:10,120 --> 00:20:11,121 God. 496 00:20:11,200 --> 00:20:12,531 One at a time. 497 00:20:18,960 --> 00:20:20,166 All right. 498 00:20:20,280 --> 00:20:22,806 Some stuff happened at the Congo Canyon Waterpark 499 00:20:22,880 --> 00:20:25,281 - that I haven't been 100% honest about. - Damn right. 500 00:20:25,360 --> 00:20:27,328 KENNY: After you guys went to bed, 501 00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:31,166 the fellas and I were down at the bar and we were having some drinks. 502 00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:37,327 We ran into some fans of mine, and they invited us up to their hotel room to party. 503 00:20:37,400 --> 00:20:38,401 We got up there 504 00:20:38,480 --> 00:20:42,565 and the party was definitely a little more intense than any of us had anticipated. 505 00:20:42,640 --> 00:20:45,803 KENNY: There were girls there. 506 00:20:47,360 --> 00:20:49,761 And Gene had unprotected oral sex with one of the girls. 507 00:20:49,840 --> 00:20:51,285 - What? - What? 508 00:20:51,360 --> 00:20:53,931 - Gene... - It's true. Gene fucked a girl in her ass. 509 00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:55,764 - That is a lie and you know it! - No, you did, Gene. 510 00:20:55,840 --> 00:20:56,841 - GENE: I did not! - What? 511 00:20:56,920 --> 00:20:58,763 - He... I came into the room... - Hold on. Hold on. 512 00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:00,763 As soon as I did, I saw him. I said, "Gene, you're married." 513 00:21:00,840 --> 00:21:02,922 - Punched him in his face because it upset me. - Come on. 514 00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:04,843 - I didn't want to see that. - Are you fucking nuts, man? 515 00:21:04,920 --> 00:21:06,410 I didn't have sex with anybody. 516 00:21:06,480 --> 00:21:08,528 - Tel, can you back me up, please? - Yeah, absolutely. 517 00:21:08,600 --> 00:21:10,364 Sit your fucking ass down right now. 518 00:21:10,440 --> 00:21:12,283 Tel, you sat there and watched it fucking happen. 519 00:21:12,360 --> 00:21:14,010 - Tel! - And you jerked off. 520 00:21:14,080 --> 00:21:16,128 He sat there and let it happen and got off on it. 521 00:21:16,200 --> 00:21:17,929 The worst thing you said that happened was the cocaine. 522 00:21:18,000 --> 00:21:19,126 APRIL: What? DIXIE: Cocaine? 523 00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:21,168 - GENE: Well... - Cocaine is drugs! 524 00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:24,084 I didn't do any cocaine, though. There was cocaine there. 525 00:21:24,160 --> 00:21:25,286 - Yeah, right, Gene. - I don't know why I didn't... 526 00:21:25,360 --> 00:21:26,566 - ...fucking tell me about! - Hey! 527 00:21:26,680 --> 00:21:27,647 - Chill out! - Why didn't you tell me about it? 528 00:21:27,720 --> 00:21:28,721 GENE: I didn't do anything! 529 00:21:28,800 --> 00:21:30,086 Would you say something here, Kenny, please? 530 00:21:30,160 --> 00:21:31,127 Coked out dick! Coke dick! 531 00:21:31,200 --> 00:21:32,804 - What the fuck is wrong with you? - I didn't do anything! 532 00:21:32,880 --> 00:21:34,120 Here's your fucking cheese, you rat. 533 00:21:34,200 --> 00:21:35,804 - Eat it! - Fuck you. 534 00:21:35,880 --> 00:21:38,167 I hate you! 535 00:21:38,240 --> 00:21:39,924 - I hate you! - Dix! 536 00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:43,527 I didn't do any drugs, Dix! Come on! 537 00:21:43,600 --> 00:21:44,681 Dix! 538 00:21:45,880 --> 00:21:47,644 (DOOR SLAMS) (KENNY SIGHS) 539 00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:50,048 This is the cost of lies, guys. 540 00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:54,643 When we aren't faithful to the ones that we make promises to. 541 00:21:55,400 --> 00:21:58,609 I think it's probably best if we just end spaghetti night now, okay? 542 00:21:58,680 --> 00:22:01,729 Let's go. Tel, get up. Get the fuck out of here. Let's go. 543 00:22:03,960 --> 00:22:05,724 - I love you so much. - I love you, too. 544 00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:11,890 MAN: There we go! 545 00:22:21,600 --> 00:22:22,761 GUY: Hey! 546 00:22:23,440 --> 00:22:25,841 Kenny P., what's up, champion? 547 00:22:25,920 --> 00:22:27,922 - Spicy! What's happening, baby? - KP, yes! 548 00:22:28,000 --> 00:22:29,889 - How you feeling? - Wonderful, man. Wonderful. 549 00:22:29,960 --> 00:22:31,530 All right. Soak it in. 550 00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:32,601 There it is. 551 00:22:32,680 --> 00:22:35,286 There's your ball field today. You ready to strike some motherfuckers out? 552 00:22:35,360 --> 00:22:36,600 DONTEL: Yo! 553 00:22:38,440 --> 00:22:41,808 Guy Young and Kenny Flowers. 554 00:22:41,920 --> 00:22:43,285 What's up, Dontel? 555 00:22:43,360 --> 00:22:46,409 Dontel, Dontel. How's the job hunt going? 556 00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:47,641 GUY: Don't worry. 557 00:22:47,760 --> 00:22:50,570 They still take food stamps here at the concession stand. 558 00:22:50,680 --> 00:22:53,524 Hey, on the real tip, I want to apologize to you, Dontel. 559 00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:56,723 I'm so sorry I ruined your whole entire fucking life. 560 00:22:56,800 --> 00:22:58,211 Must be a tough break, kid! 561 00:22:58,280 --> 00:22:59,327 - Burn! - No, no, no, no. 562 00:22:59,440 --> 00:23:00,646 It ain't no thing but a chicken wing. 563 00:23:01,520 --> 00:23:03,727 I mean, truth be told, man, I feel sorry for you, 564 00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:07,361 having to work for this insecure backstabbing asshole. 565 00:23:07,440 --> 00:23:09,681 DONTEL: I ain't telling you nothing you don't already know, right? 566 00:23:09,760 --> 00:23:11,444 Look at you, man. Come on. 567 00:23:11,520 --> 00:23:12,567 You're just obsessed with me. 568 00:23:12,640 --> 00:23:14,608 - No, no, no. - You want to buttfuck me at the charity event? 569 00:23:14,680 --> 00:23:15,761 Is that what you want? 570 00:23:15,840 --> 00:23:18,161 DONTEL: Nah, you got it all wrong, bro. 571 00:23:18,240 --> 00:23:20,208 See, I know why you cut me out, Guy. 572 00:23:20,280 --> 00:23:21,247 Yeah, why is that? 573 00:23:21,320 --> 00:23:24,164 Because you saw the beauty of my black ass coming for you. 574 00:23:24,840 --> 00:23:26,001 But hey, 575 00:23:26,080 --> 00:23:32,247 today's about the charities, about the kids, about AIDS, and about having a good time. 576 00:23:32,320 --> 00:23:34,766 So we just gonna put a pin in that for now. 577 00:23:34,840 --> 00:23:37,241 Peace, bitches. 578 00:23:37,320 --> 00:23:38,287 GUY: Bye, Dontel. 579 00:23:38,360 --> 00:23:39,771 You fucking loser. 580 00:23:39,840 --> 00:23:41,126 GUY: All of you! 581 00:23:41,200 --> 00:23:45,762 And that's why we're here, to show Dontel that he's a fucking loser, 582 00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:48,764 - 'cause losers always forget. - (KENNY CHUCKLES) 583 00:23:48,840 --> 00:23:50,444 Hell, yeah, they do. 584 00:23:50,520 --> 00:23:56,004 Let's smash these fucking losers so hard their charities don't get a goddamn dime. 585 00:24:07,200 --> 00:24:10,283 Hey, hey, hey, Jed. Hold up for a second. Let me help you with that. 586 00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:12,729 Thank you kindly there, Kenny. 587 00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:14,245 - There you go, buddy. - You're a good man. 588 00:24:15,120 --> 00:24:18,727 Guy, you look real comfortable stroking that black thang like that. 589 00:24:18,800 --> 00:24:21,610 A little like Dontel in your hand. 590 00:24:21,680 --> 00:24:23,330 (DONTEL'S TEAM LAUGHS) 591 00:24:25,320 --> 00:24:26,526 On your mark. 592 00:24:28,240 --> 00:24:29,651 Get set. 593 00:24:31,800 --> 00:24:33,484 Get in your positions! 594 00:24:35,680 --> 00:24:36,681 (CROWD CHEERS) 595 00:24:37,560 --> 00:24:39,847 - The Dragon Boat Charity Challenge is on! - Come on, let's go! 596 00:24:39,920 --> 00:24:41,365 Come on, now! 597 00:24:41,720 --> 00:24:42,721 Come on! 598 00:24:43,120 --> 00:24:45,521 Dragon Boat number one off to an early lead. 599 00:24:45,600 --> 00:24:47,602 - Let's go! Move it! - Keep it together! 600 00:24:58,960 --> 00:25:01,247 Dragon Boat number two is slowly catching up. 601 00:25:01,320 --> 00:25:02,810 Come on! 602 00:25:02,880 --> 00:25:05,565 - Push it, guys! Faster! - Move in front! 603 00:25:05,640 --> 00:25:06,641 Push it! Push it! 604 00:25:09,160 --> 00:25:10,446 - Go! - Move! 605 00:25:10,520 --> 00:25:12,443 Dragon Boat number two picking up speed! 606 00:25:12,520 --> 00:25:15,000 Dragon Boat number two catching up to Dragon Boat number one! 607 00:25:15,080 --> 00:25:16,320 What the fuck? Come on, Forney! 608 00:25:16,400 --> 00:25:19,051 - You're slowing us down! - I'm doing my best, Guy! 609 00:25:19,160 --> 00:25:21,766 Dragon Boat number two catching up! 610 00:25:21,840 --> 00:25:23,683 - DONTEL: Bye, Guy! - Neck and neck now! 611 00:25:23,760 --> 00:25:25,728 GUY: Goddamn it, Forney! Stay in rhythm! 612 00:25:25,800 --> 00:25:27,882 You biscuits-and-gravy-eating motherfucker! 613 00:25:27,960 --> 00:25:28,927 I'm trying, Guy! 614 00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:30,365 - GUY: I thought you were a racer? - I am! 615 00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:31,566 You're gonna make us lose! 616 00:25:32,880 --> 00:25:34,041 KP! 617 00:25:34,120 --> 00:25:36,009 - What? - Get him out of the boat! 618 00:25:36,080 --> 00:25:37,081 - What? - Get Forney out of the boat! 619 00:25:37,160 --> 00:25:39,845 - Are you fucking kidding? - Get him out of the boat right now! 620 00:25:39,920 --> 00:25:41,684 - He's dead weight! - No! 621 00:25:41,760 --> 00:25:44,206 - Get him out of the fucking boat! - Come on, Kenny. No, no! 622 00:25:44,280 --> 00:25:45,930 Hey! 623 00:25:46,840 --> 00:25:50,561 Dragon Boat number one threw a member out of the boat. 624 00:25:50,640 --> 00:25:54,406 Dragon Boat number one is really faster now. 625 00:25:54,480 --> 00:25:55,447 Yeah! 626 00:25:55,520 --> 00:25:57,045 Go! Go! 627 00:25:59,720 --> 00:26:04,089 It's Dragon Boat number one, for the win! 628 00:26:08,600 --> 00:26:10,204 Suck our dick! 629 00:26:10,280 --> 00:26:11,281 GUY: Suck it! 630 00:26:24,160 --> 00:26:25,446 GUY: Look at that little duh-duh-doo. 631 00:26:25,560 --> 00:26:27,608 - Forney almost blew it for us, huh? - Uh-huh. 632 00:26:27,680 --> 00:26:29,205 You did good, Kenny, huh? 633 00:26:29,280 --> 00:26:30,770 It feels nice to win. 634 00:26:30,840 --> 00:26:32,649 Yeah, it feels great! 635 00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:35,644 All right. Well, why don't you shower up 'cause we're going dancing tonight! 636 00:26:36,040 --> 00:26:37,485 There we go. 637 00:26:43,760 --> 00:26:47,287 KENNY: Enemies can appear in our lives out of nowhere. 638 00:26:47,360 --> 00:26:50,170 A stranger who cuts you off in traffic. 639 00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:56,041 A dude who looks at you weird in the men's room. 640 00:26:56,560 --> 00:26:59,325 Or treasured friends who betray you out of jealousy. 641 00:27:05,680 --> 00:27:11,687 But when enemies do rise up, they must be dealt with decisively on animal instinct. 642 00:27:11,760 --> 00:27:13,888 Are the kids in bed? 643 00:27:14,960 --> 00:27:15,961 Sí. 644 00:27:16,320 --> 00:27:17,651 Good. 645 00:27:17,720 --> 00:27:20,041 'Cause the dick is back. 646 00:27:25,160 --> 00:27:26,446 Ay, gracias a Dios. 647 00:27:34,920 --> 00:27:35,921 KENNY: Mortals falter. 648 00:27:37,560 --> 00:27:38,925 Kings act. 649 00:27:42,120 --> 00:27:43,884 And the mortal who acts... 650 00:27:45,520 --> 00:27:48,000 Well, that motherfucker becomes king.