1
00:00:04,137 --> 00:00:05,870
What-what are you doing?
2
00:00:05,872 --> 00:00:08,740
The light is red
so I came to a stop.
3
00:00:08,742 --> 00:00:12,243
You're in a stolen cop car
with a dead hooker in the trunk.
4
00:00:12,245 --> 00:00:15,280
You don't have to
obey traffic laws.
5
00:00:15,282 --> 00:00:17,916
I know I don't have to.
6
00:00:17,918 --> 00:00:20,485
The fun is choosing to.
7
00:00:21,621 --> 00:00:25,156
Hey. Missed you guys
at the faculty mixer.
8
00:00:25,158 --> 00:00:28,560
Ah, you should have been there;
dessert was bananas.
9
00:00:28,562 --> 00:00:30,829
Sorry, that was misleading.
The dessert was pie,
10
00:00:30,831 --> 00:00:32,630
but the pie was bananas.
11
00:00:33,567 --> 00:00:34,732
Actually, the pie was cherry,
12
00:00:34,734 --> 00:00:38,403
but the taste
of the pie was... bananas.
13
00:00:40,540 --> 00:00:44,476
Those mixers are such
a waste of university money.
14
00:00:44,478 --> 00:00:45,844
If they spent less money
15
00:00:45,846 --> 00:00:48,413
on frivolous nonsense
and more money on science,
16
00:00:48,415 --> 00:00:49,681
we'd all be better off.
17
00:00:49,683 --> 00:00:51,549
You're a theoretical physicist.
18
00:00:51,551 --> 00:00:54,119
What more do you need than
an office and a whiteboard?
19
00:00:54,121 --> 00:00:57,255
Someday, my new formulas
on entropy decrease
20
00:00:57,257 --> 00:00:59,657
due to quantum decoherence
will need to be tested
21
00:00:59,659 --> 00:01:01,726
and that will require funding.
22
00:01:01,728 --> 00:01:03,728
Your theories
are pretty abstract.
23
00:01:03,730 --> 00:01:05,063
I wouldn't even know how to
24
00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:06,664
design an experiment
to prove them.
25
00:01:06,666 --> 00:01:09,434
Says the experimental physicist.
26
00:01:11,338 --> 00:01:13,571
Well, I know a place the
university can make some cuts.
27
00:01:13,573 --> 00:01:15,240
Bye, Leonard.
28
00:01:15,242 --> 00:01:16,407
One second, one second.
29
00:01:16,409 --> 00:01:17,876
He's got a point.
30
00:01:17,878 --> 00:01:19,744
In order to corroborate
your string theory research,
31
00:01:19,746 --> 00:01:21,279
you'd have to create
a black hole.
32
00:01:21,281 --> 00:01:23,014
Wouldn't that destroy the Earth?
33
00:01:23,016 --> 00:01:28,286
Perhaps, but we'd all go to
the grave knowing I was right.
34
00:01:28,288 --> 00:01:30,255
I guess you could create
35
00:01:30,257 --> 00:01:32,690
a contained
microscopic black hole.
36
00:01:32,692 --> 00:01:35,994
Huh. Interesting.
37
00:01:35,996 --> 00:01:38,263
Welcome back, Leonard.
38
00:01:39,032 --> 00:01:41,432
Sorry, you're out.
39
00:01:41,434 --> 00:01:42,433
What did I do?
40
00:01:42,435 --> 00:01:43,052
Exactly.
41
00:01:43,053 --> 00:01:47,053
♪ The Big Bang Theory 11x22 ♪
The Monetary Insufficiency
Original Air Date on April 26, 2018
42
00:01:47,054 --> 00:01:49,605
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
43
00:01:49,609 --> 00:01:52,944
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
44
00:01:52,946 --> 00:01:54,579
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
45
00:01:54,581 --> 00:01:57,115
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
46
00:01:57,117 --> 00:01:59,784
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
47
00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:02,453
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
48
00:02:02,455 --> 00:02:04,355
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
49
00:02:04,357 --> 00:02:05,824
♪ Bang! ♪
50
00:02:05,909 --> 00:02:10,933
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
51
00:02:10,934 --> 00:02:13,268
Ooh, this one's pretty.
52
00:02:13,270 --> 00:02:15,036
Mm. My mother
wouldn't approve;
53
00:02:15,038 --> 00:02:17,605
shows too much clavicle.
54
00:02:17,607 --> 00:02:20,375
She calls it
"the bosom's welcome mat."
55
00:02:20,377 --> 00:02:22,210
I can't wait to get drunk
56
00:02:22,212 --> 00:02:25,046
and pick a fight with
her at your wedding.
57
00:02:25,048 --> 00:02:28,416
It's just so hard to tell
what will look good on me.
58
00:02:28,418 --> 00:02:30,218
No. This is just
to give you ideas.
59
00:02:30,220 --> 00:02:32,387
You know, do-do you want
something simple and elegant?
60
00:02:32,389 --> 00:02:33,788
I mean, do you
want a train?
61
00:02:33,790 --> 00:02:36,925
Ooh, we're talking about trains.
62
00:02:36,927 --> 00:02:38,760
Not the kind
of trains you like.
63
00:02:38,762 --> 00:02:41,296
Oh, I like all kinds of
trains-- steam, diesel,
64
00:02:41,298 --> 00:02:43,231
coal, elevated, bullet.
65
00:02:43,233 --> 00:02:45,767
I defy you to name a train
that I don't like.
66
00:02:45,769 --> 00:02:47,602
The kind on the back
of a wedding dress?
67
00:02:47,604 --> 00:02:50,605
I did not see that coming.
Good job.
68
00:02:51,742 --> 00:02:53,608
But while we're on the subject
of fashion,
69
00:02:53,610 --> 00:02:55,910
I'm asking the university
for some funding tomorrow.
70
00:02:55,912 --> 00:02:57,312
What should I wear?
71
00:02:57,314 --> 00:02:59,547
Mm. Well, I've got a push-up bra
I can loan you
72
00:02:59,549 --> 00:03:01,549
that always gets me free drinks.
73
00:03:02,352 --> 00:03:04,018
How much money are you
asking for?
74
00:03:04,020 --> 00:03:06,020
$500 million.
75
00:03:07,824 --> 00:03:09,357
Then I'd go no bra.
76
00:03:10,594 --> 00:03:13,061
What do you need
that kind of money for?
77
00:03:13,063 --> 00:03:15,730
I have figured out
an experimental design
78
00:03:15,732 --> 00:03:18,633
that may corroborate my latest
thinking on string theory.
79
00:03:18,635 --> 00:03:21,970
I just need 2,148
high-power lasers
80
00:03:21,972 --> 00:03:25,240
to compress 20 micrograms of
gold into a small enough volume
81
00:03:25,242 --> 00:03:28,042
to make a microscopic
black hole.
82
00:03:29,346 --> 00:03:31,279
Just nod.
83
00:03:31,281 --> 00:03:33,248
Mmm.
84
00:03:33,250 --> 00:03:35,784
Sheldon, they're not gonna give
you half a billion dollars.
85
00:03:35,786 --> 00:03:37,652
I mean, they won't
even give me that much
86
00:03:37,654 --> 00:03:41,256
and I keep promising I can make
people's brains "grow younger."
87
00:03:42,726 --> 00:03:43,925
Can you?
88
00:03:43,927 --> 00:03:46,294
No. Shh.
89
00:03:47,631 --> 00:03:50,565
But I need it. It's the only way
to settle the contradictions
90
00:03:50,567 --> 00:03:52,934
between gravity
and quantum mechanics.
91
00:03:52,936 --> 00:03:55,603
Well, it's too much money, you
can't ask for that all at once.
92
00:03:55,605 --> 00:03:58,440
Well, what if I ask for it
in six easy installments
93
00:03:58,442 --> 00:04:03,445
of $83,333,333.33?
94
00:04:03,447 --> 00:04:06,381
Okay. What if you asked
for $20 million?
95
00:04:06,383 --> 00:04:08,016
I'm sorry,
I'm trying to do science,
96
00:04:08,018 --> 00:04:10,985
not hire Lady Gaga
to come to my birthday.
97
00:04:12,889 --> 00:04:15,690
Do you even know
who Lady Gaga is?
98
00:04:15,692 --> 00:04:19,260
Presumably,
the wife of Lord Gaga.
99
00:04:20,997 --> 00:04:24,199
Sheldon, you know,
Penny's got a point.
100
00:04:24,201 --> 00:04:26,201
Sometimes when you want
something big from someone,
101
00:04:26,203 --> 00:04:29,070
you-you got to be careful not
to scare them away, you know?
102
00:04:29,072 --> 00:04:32,707
You got to start small
and-and build up slowly,
103
00:04:32,709 --> 00:04:36,578
even if it takes
eight years.
104
00:04:37,948 --> 00:04:41,483
Eight long years.
105
00:04:44,387 --> 00:04:46,654
That's oddly specific.
106
00:04:47,457 --> 00:04:48,957
Have you ever done that?
107
00:04:48,959 --> 00:04:50,859
Nope.
108
00:04:58,268 --> 00:05:01,135
So with this level of
high-power laser array,
109
00:05:01,137 --> 00:05:02,670
we would actually be able
110
00:05:02,672 --> 00:05:04,539
to solve the black hole
information paradox
111
00:05:04,541 --> 00:05:05,974
once and for all.
112
00:05:05,976 --> 00:05:09,143
That's impressive, and how much
funding were you looking for?
113
00:05:09,145 --> 00:05:10,845
$20 million.
114
00:05:10,847 --> 00:05:12,113
Really?
115
00:05:12,115 --> 00:05:14,582
You think you can build that
for $20 million?
116
00:05:14,584 --> 00:05:16,484
Not a chance.
117
00:05:16,486 --> 00:05:19,721
I'm sorry, then why are you
asking me for it?
118
00:05:19,723 --> 00:05:22,590
Because once you've
spent $20 million,
119
00:05:22,592 --> 00:05:25,527
you're much more likely
to give me an additional 50.
120
00:05:25,529 --> 00:05:27,662
So actually, what you're saying
is with $70 million,
121
00:05:27,664 --> 00:05:29,030
you can build this.
122
00:05:29,032 --> 00:05:31,799
I can see why you'd think that,
but no.
123
00:05:32,702 --> 00:05:34,435
You can't go
to the board of trustees
124
00:05:34,437 --> 00:05:36,771
and say you gave Sheldon Cooper
$70 million
125
00:05:36,773 --> 00:05:38,172
and have nothing to show for it.
126
00:05:38,174 --> 00:05:39,874
No. The only way
you'd be able
127
00:05:39,876 --> 00:05:42,110
to save face is to double down.
128
00:05:42,112 --> 00:05:43,378
So 140?
129
00:05:43,380 --> 00:05:46,180
And then double again.
130
00:05:46,182 --> 00:05:47,415
280?
131
00:05:47,417 --> 00:05:51,119
And then-- good news--
not quite double again.
132
00:05:51,121 --> 00:05:53,755
So, uh, what do you say?
133
00:05:53,757 --> 00:05:56,124
We have a deal?
134
00:05:56,126 --> 00:05:58,059
He said no?
135
00:05:58,061 --> 00:06:00,094
No. That's only
a two letter word.
136
00:06:00,096 --> 00:06:01,963
You're gonna have to
double down.
137
00:06:01,965 --> 00:06:06,668
Well, I'm sorry, Sheldon,
but this sort of thing happens.
138
00:06:06,670 --> 00:06:08,503
Higgs had to wait
almost 50 years
139
00:06:08,505 --> 00:06:11,205
before they built a collider
big enough to prove his theory.
140
00:06:11,207 --> 00:06:12,974
50 years?
141
00:06:12,976 --> 00:06:15,410
But I want to play with it now.
142
00:06:15,412 --> 00:06:17,278
You just
have to wait for science
143
00:06:17,280 --> 00:06:19,614
to catch up
or technology to get cheaper.
144
00:06:19,616 --> 00:06:21,516
Think about, uh, DVD players--
145
00:06:21,518 --> 00:06:23,184
they used to cost, like,
a thousand dollars,
146
00:06:23,186 --> 00:06:26,955
but just the other day
I used one to smash a bug.
147
00:06:28,391 --> 00:06:30,425
Yeah, you-you just have
to be patient.
148
00:06:30,427 --> 00:06:32,293
But what if
while I'm being patient,
149
00:06:32,295 --> 00:06:34,195
someone more relentless than me
150
00:06:34,197 --> 00:06:36,764
badgers their university
into giving them money?
151
00:06:36,766 --> 00:06:38,666
If there's someone
more relentless than you,
152
00:06:38,668 --> 00:06:40,301
I'd like to meet them.
153
00:06:41,504 --> 00:06:43,838
I would not.
154
00:06:43,840 --> 00:06:47,375
I'm not waiting for the
university to come around.
155
00:06:47,377 --> 00:06:49,777
I'll find another way
to raise the money.
156
00:06:49,779 --> 00:06:51,846
Ooh, if it's one of those booths
where we can throw a pie at you,
157
00:06:51,848 --> 00:06:53,781
I'm in for, like, 20 bucks.
158
00:06:54,884 --> 00:06:57,151
40 bucks if I can throw
a DVD player.
159
00:07:00,857 --> 00:07:03,024
Would you like some champagne?
160
00:07:03,026 --> 00:07:04,058
Oh, thank you.
161
00:07:04,060 --> 00:07:05,426
- Thanks.
- Sure.
162
00:07:05,428 --> 00:07:06,995
This is nice.
163
00:07:06,997 --> 00:07:10,498
What? Helping Amy find
a dress or day drinking?
164
00:07:10,500 --> 00:07:12,533
It's just nice, okay?
165
00:07:13,803 --> 00:07:15,703
What do you think?
166
00:07:15,705 --> 00:07:17,705
Amy, oh, my God.
167
00:07:17,707 --> 00:07:19,007
You look
so beautiful.
168
00:07:19,009 --> 00:07:20,808
I feel beautiful.
169
00:07:20,810 --> 00:07:22,577
And look: both clavicles.
170
00:07:22,579 --> 00:07:24,178
Take that, Mom.
171
00:07:25,815 --> 00:07:27,048
You know what they say:
172
00:07:27,050 --> 00:07:28,616
if you got 'em,
flaunt 'em.
173
00:07:28,618 --> 00:07:32,887
Is it possible that the very
first dress is the dress?
174
00:07:32,889 --> 00:07:34,088
Oh, don't be silly.
175
00:07:34,090 --> 00:07:36,024
You can't buy
the first dress you try on.
176
00:07:36,026 --> 00:07:38,359
That'd be like marrying
the first guy that you...
177
00:07:39,696 --> 00:07:43,731
You can't buy
the first dress you try on.
178
00:07:45,068 --> 00:07:47,235
Little finger
sandwiches, too.
179
00:07:47,237 --> 00:07:49,504
This place is amazing.
Interesting thing
180
00:07:49,506 --> 00:07:51,372
about finger sandwiches:
you put enough of them together,
181
00:07:51,374 --> 00:07:53,141
you got a sandwich.
182
00:07:54,844 --> 00:07:56,844
Uh, guys,
we have a problem.
183
00:07:56,846 --> 00:07:58,046
- Are you okay?
- What's wrong?
184
00:07:58,048 --> 00:08:01,449
I look amazing in all
of these dresses!
185
00:08:01,451 --> 00:08:02,784
Wow. Look at your waist.
186
00:08:02,786 --> 00:08:04,252
Where you been
hiding that thing?
187
00:08:04,254 --> 00:08:08,222
Bernadette, stop.
188
00:08:08,224 --> 00:08:10,458
Penny, you say
something nice now.
189
00:08:10,460 --> 00:08:13,995
Boy, you know, when Sheldon
sees you in that dress,
190
00:08:13,997 --> 00:08:16,030
he's gonna want to
methodically take it off,
191
00:08:16,032 --> 00:08:18,666
fold it up, carefully place it
in a storage box,
192
00:08:18,668 --> 00:08:20,868
label it, and then ravish you.
193
00:08:20,870 --> 00:08:23,004
Should I try on some more?
194
00:08:23,006 --> 00:08:24,005
Are you having fun?
195
00:08:24,007 --> 00:08:25,339
Am I having fun being beautiful?
196
00:08:25,341 --> 00:08:26,908
Of course I am!
197
00:08:26,910 --> 00:08:28,910
Great. Keep going.
198
00:08:29,746 --> 00:08:30,978
This is it.
199
00:08:30,980 --> 00:08:32,780
This is the one.
200
00:08:39,622 --> 00:08:41,422
Do you love it?
201
00:08:42,292 --> 00:08:44,659
Do you?
202
00:08:44,661 --> 00:08:47,061
I do.
203
00:08:47,063 --> 00:08:49,831
Wow.
204
00:08:50,900 --> 00:08:54,435
Also, wow.
205
00:08:58,308 --> 00:08:59,674
- Hello, Leonard.
- Hi.
206
00:08:59,676 --> 00:09:00,975
Are you doing anything?
207
00:09:00,977 --> 00:09:03,211
No. I'm just sitting here
at my desk
208
00:09:03,213 --> 00:09:06,280
typing on my computer
for nothing.
209
00:09:06,282 --> 00:09:08,449
That was my guess,
but I didn't want to assume.
210
00:09:09,419 --> 00:09:12,787
Can you help me shoot
my Kickstarter video?
211
00:09:12,789 --> 00:09:14,622
Do you really think people
are gonna give you
212
00:09:14,624 --> 00:09:16,090
half a billion dollars?
213
00:09:16,092 --> 00:09:18,726
Of course not, but if I can
raise enough seed money
214
00:09:18,728 --> 00:09:20,728
to show that I'm serious,
I should be able
215
00:09:20,730 --> 00:09:22,630
to attract some major investors.
216
00:09:22,632 --> 00:09:26,167
And look at the cool
incentives I'm offering.
217
00:09:26,169 --> 00:09:29,437
"For $50,000,
I will examine your diet
218
00:09:29,439 --> 00:09:33,307
and create a customized
bathroom schedule."
219
00:09:34,844 --> 00:09:37,979
That's fitting--
50 grand down the toilet.
220
00:09:37,981 --> 00:09:39,480
Well, how about this?
221
00:09:39,482 --> 00:09:41,849
For $100,000,
I will design the flag
222
00:09:41,851 --> 00:09:43,618
of your house or apartment.
223
00:09:43,620 --> 00:09:45,620
And for $1 million,
224
00:09:45,622 --> 00:09:49,357
I will come over and tell you
what's wrong with you.
225
00:09:49,359 --> 00:09:54,428
Aw, and all these years,
I've been getting that for free.
226
00:09:54,430 --> 00:09:56,731
Don't be smug, Leonard.
227
00:09:56,733 --> 00:09:58,866
That's one of the things
that's wrong with you.
228
00:10:01,538 --> 00:10:03,371
Well, that was
a successful trip.
229
00:10:03,373 --> 00:10:04,705
Yes.
230
00:10:04,707 --> 00:10:06,774
Amy found a dress
that she liked.
231
00:10:06,776 --> 00:10:08,643
She sure did.
232
00:10:08,645 --> 00:10:11,078
She found
233
00:10:11,080 --> 00:10:13,247
a dress that looked like...
234
00:10:13,249 --> 00:10:15,850
like it made her happy.
235
00:10:15,852 --> 00:10:18,052
She-she did look happy.
236
00:10:18,054 --> 00:10:21,589
I mean, her face was
just glowing, so...
237
00:10:21,591 --> 00:10:23,491
Yeah, we should make sure
the photographer knows
238
00:10:23,493 --> 00:10:25,660
to just really...
get in there.
239
00:10:25,662 --> 00:10:27,228
Mm.
240
00:10:29,065 --> 00:10:30,932
So we agree it's awful?
241
00:10:30,934 --> 00:10:34,669
That dress should be
set on fire!
242
00:10:34,671 --> 00:10:36,637
Should we say something?
243
00:10:36,639 --> 00:10:38,072
No, we can't.
244
00:10:38,074 --> 00:10:39,841
But don't you think
she brought us with her
245
00:10:39,843 --> 00:10:41,309
'cause she wants
our honest opinion?
246
00:10:41,311 --> 00:10:43,811
No one wants that.
247
00:10:43,813 --> 00:10:45,179
I do.
248
00:10:45,181 --> 00:10:48,149
No, ya don't.
249
00:10:48,151 --> 00:10:49,717
I don't want her
to look back
250
00:10:49,719 --> 00:10:51,619
and think she made
some awful mistake.
251
00:10:51,621 --> 00:10:54,722
You mean like your dumb
Cookie Monster tattoo?
252
00:10:55,491 --> 00:10:58,092
See? Was that fun?
253
00:10:58,094 --> 00:10:59,961
Someone's gonna
say something.
254
00:10:59,963 --> 00:11:02,730
It should be us now instead
of everyone at her wedding.
255
00:11:02,732 --> 00:11:05,233
Okay, but as long
as we do it gently.
256
00:11:05,235 --> 00:11:06,834
And together.
257
00:11:06,836 --> 00:11:08,936
Well, what about my dress?
258
00:11:08,938 --> 00:11:10,304
Don't you like it?
259
00:11:11,541 --> 00:11:14,575
- I don't.
- It's beautiful.
260
00:11:23,536 --> 00:11:26,570
Hey, Stuart, I'd like
to sell some comic books.
261
00:11:26,572 --> 00:11:28,906
Oh. Well, I know
all about that.
262
00:11:28,908 --> 00:11:31,542
Step one is flunk
out of art school.
263
00:11:32,478 --> 00:11:34,612
Well, why are
you selling 'em?
264
00:11:34,614 --> 00:11:36,480
The university is refusing
to fund my experiment,
265
00:11:36,482 --> 00:11:39,350
so I need to raise money
and do it on my own.
266
00:11:39,352 --> 00:11:40,618
Ah. How much do you need?
267
00:11:40,620 --> 00:11:43,888
For a start, I'm trying
to raise $500,000.
268
00:11:43,890 --> 00:11:47,525
Well, I hope you have
that rare Superman
269
00:11:47,527 --> 00:11:50,828
printed on the skin
of actual Superman.
270
00:11:50,830 --> 00:11:52,897
I know you're making a joke,
271
00:11:52,899 --> 00:11:55,466
but I really do have
some valuable issues in here.
272
00:11:55,468 --> 00:11:57,635
And this is just
the first box of many.
273
00:11:57,637 --> 00:11:59,236
All right, let's
see what you got.
274
00:12:01,507 --> 00:12:05,609
Huh. Is this a complete run
of Todd McFarlane's Spawn?
275
00:12:09,282 --> 00:12:11,715
Yes.
276
00:12:11,717 --> 00:12:13,584
Ooh, look at this.
277
00:12:13,586 --> 00:12:16,287
Giant-Size X-Men
number one,
278
00:12:16,289 --> 00:12:18,989
Len Wein's relaunch
of the franchise.
279
00:12:18,991 --> 00:12:21,425
Yeah. I know what it is.
I'm the one who bought it,
280
00:12:21,427 --> 00:12:23,093
bagged it, boarded it
and taped it shut
281
00:12:23,095 --> 00:12:25,196
while wearing
white cotton gloves.
282
00:12:25,198 --> 00:12:26,931
Okay, well, you know,
283
00:12:26,933 --> 00:12:29,733
I'm gonna have to open it
to assess its condition.
284
00:12:29,735 --> 00:12:31,602
Just be gentle.
285
00:12:31,604 --> 00:12:35,206
It's never felt
the touch of a man before.
286
00:12:36,309 --> 00:12:39,076
You don't seem like you
really want to sell these.
287
00:12:39,078 --> 00:12:41,445
Of course I don't want
to sell these.
288
00:12:41,447 --> 00:12:43,480
These are all
important to me,
289
00:12:43,482 --> 00:12:45,349
but not as important
as science,
290
00:12:45,351 --> 00:12:48,319
and if this is the sacrifice
I need to make, then so be it.
291
00:12:48,321 --> 00:12:51,255
Okay. Uh, why don't you
leave these here with me,
292
00:12:51,257 --> 00:12:52,990
and I'll-I'll price
'em out for you.
293
00:12:52,992 --> 00:12:55,492
Is it okay
if I stand here and watch?
294
00:12:55,494 --> 00:12:57,661
Sure.
295
00:12:59,966 --> 00:13:02,766
If anyone asks,
tell them I was brave.
296
00:13:05,738 --> 00:13:08,339
Hey, I can't believe you just
threw me under the bus.
297
00:13:08,341 --> 00:13:09,874
I know, right?
That was crazy.
298
00:13:09,876 --> 00:13:11,809
Well...
299
00:13:11,811 --> 00:13:13,244
Do you know how
that makes me look?
300
00:13:13,246 --> 00:13:16,547
- Uh, that's an easy one-- bad.
- Well...
301
00:13:16,549 --> 00:13:18,482
Why didn't you tell her that you
didn't like the dress, either?
302
00:13:18,484 --> 00:13:19,950
I mean, what happened
to our united front?
303
00:13:19,952 --> 00:13:22,686
I'm sorry. Is this your
first day being a girl?
304
00:13:30,363 --> 00:13:32,463
Ooh, did your mom pack
your lunch?
305
00:13:32,465 --> 00:13:34,565
Of course not.
306
00:13:34,567 --> 00:13:36,767
Do you know how much it costs
to pack a tuna fish sandwich
307
00:13:36,769 --> 00:13:40,537
in dry ice and overnight it
from Texas?
308
00:13:40,539 --> 00:13:43,207
Well, I do, and my mother says
it's too expensive.
309
00:13:43,943 --> 00:13:45,309
I like tuna fish.
310
00:13:45,311 --> 00:13:48,312
Do you want it? I'll sell it
to you for $5,000.
311
00:13:48,314 --> 00:13:49,546
How's the fundraising going?
312
00:13:49,548 --> 00:13:51,540
Oh, that depends.
Raj, was that a "yes"?
313
00:13:51,564 --> 00:13:52,050
No.
314
00:13:52,051 --> 00:13:54,051
It's going badly.
315
00:13:54,053 --> 00:13:55,819
How much have
you raised?
316
00:13:55,821 --> 00:13:57,988
Well, with my
Kickstarter campaign,
317
00:13:57,990 --> 00:14:00,658
selling my collectibles, and
the money in my bank account,
318
00:14:00,660 --> 00:14:02,593
about $65,000.
319
00:14:02,595 --> 00:14:04,328
Wow. That's a lot.
320
00:14:04,330 --> 00:14:06,063
Yeah, not enough.
321
00:14:06,065 --> 00:14:08,465
It's so frustrating that
science should be held hostage
322
00:14:08,467 --> 00:14:10,034
to the almighty dollar.
323
00:14:10,036 --> 00:14:12,603
Well, don't give up. You'll find
that money somewhere.
324
00:14:12,605 --> 00:14:13,971
- You really think so?
- No,
325
00:14:13,973 --> 00:14:15,940
but it's good
that he has a hobby.
326
00:14:15,942 --> 00:14:17,908
You ever thought
of going to Vegas?
327
00:14:17,910 --> 00:14:20,311
Can you be more specific?
328
00:14:20,313 --> 00:14:23,847
Las Vegas?
329
00:14:23,849 --> 00:14:25,983
Oh, you mean gambling.
Mm.
330
00:14:25,985 --> 00:14:28,185
Oh. Well, that's not
the worst idea.
331
00:14:28,187 --> 00:14:31,021
Um, it is the worst idea,
and I'm including the year
332
00:14:31,023 --> 00:14:33,657
that Raj wore nothing
but tracksuits.
333
00:14:35,494 --> 00:14:37,127
Ordinary people
can't beat a casino,
334
00:14:37,129 --> 00:14:39,163
but mathematicians
and scientists,
335
00:14:39,165 --> 00:14:40,331
they do it all the time.
336
00:14:40,333 --> 00:14:41,966
Yeah, a group
of students
337
00:14:41,968 --> 00:14:45,536
from MIT took Las Vegas
for millions, and that's MIT.
338
00:14:45,538 --> 00:14:47,738
Howard went there.
339
00:14:48,741 --> 00:14:50,174
Come on, Sheldon.
340
00:14:50,176 --> 00:14:52,743
I'll give you a ride out
to the desert right now.
341
00:14:52,745 --> 00:14:54,144
No one is going to Vegas.
342
00:14:54,146 --> 00:14:56,814
No, we weren't
gonna make it to Vegas.
343
00:15:00,619 --> 00:15:02,786
Hi. Do you
have a minute?
344
00:15:02,788 --> 00:15:04,922
Depends. Is what
I'm wearing okay,
345
00:15:04,924 --> 00:15:07,358
or should I go change first?
346
00:15:07,360 --> 00:15:09,560
Look, I'm sorry.
347
00:15:09,562 --> 00:15:11,829
I never should have said
I didn't like your dress.
348
00:15:11,831 --> 00:15:13,430
It's your wedding,
and all that matters is
349
00:15:13,432 --> 00:15:14,665
that you feel beautiful.
350
00:15:14,667 --> 00:15:16,633
Thank you.
351
00:15:16,635 --> 00:15:18,635
So, are... are we good?
352
00:15:18,637 --> 00:15:19,703
No, we're not good.
353
00:15:19,705 --> 00:15:21,271
You ruined my dress.
354
00:15:21,273 --> 00:15:23,741
Well, why? I just said
you should wear it.
355
00:15:23,743 --> 00:15:26,510
Well, I can't wear it now.
I mean, I know you hate it.
356
00:15:26,512 --> 00:15:28,178
That's all I'm gonna
be thinking about.
357
00:15:28,180 --> 00:15:29,713
No, I don't hate it.
358
00:15:29,715 --> 00:15:32,349
I asked if you liked it,
and you said no.
359
00:15:32,351 --> 00:15:35,152
There is a lot of room between
"don't like" and "hate."
360
00:15:35,154 --> 00:15:38,522
You know, it's-it's where
you find rice pudding and jazz.
361
00:15:39,658 --> 00:15:41,692
Anyway, who cares
what I think?
362
00:15:41,694 --> 00:15:44,695
I do. You're the-the coolest,
363
00:15:44,697 --> 00:15:47,998
prettiest, best-dressed
person in my life.
364
00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:49,967
Okay, that would be
flattering,
365
00:15:49,969 --> 00:15:52,903
except I know
all the people in your life.
366
00:15:54,373 --> 00:15:55,873
Look, Amy,
367
00:15:55,875 --> 00:15:58,542
I don't know what to say.
I think I got stuck on the fact
368
00:15:58,544 --> 00:16:01,145
that it's not a dress I would
choose, but it shouldn't be.
369
00:16:01,147 --> 00:16:02,679
You know,
it's your dress.
370
00:16:02,681 --> 00:16:05,349
I mean, hey,
would you marry Leonard?
371
00:16:05,351 --> 00:16:06,750
Ew.
372
00:16:06,752 --> 00:16:11,922
Okay, a simple "no"
would have been fine, but...
373
00:16:11,924 --> 00:16:13,757
you see my point.
374
00:16:13,759 --> 00:16:15,526
That we're different people?
375
00:16:15,528 --> 00:16:18,128
Yes, and from now on,
I am gonna remember
376
00:16:18,130 --> 00:16:20,264
that this wedding
is all about you.
377
00:16:20,266 --> 00:16:23,067
I appreciate that.
378
00:16:23,069 --> 00:16:24,968
You're a good maid of honor.
379
00:16:27,606 --> 00:16:29,807
It's Bernadette.
Hello?
380
00:16:29,809 --> 00:16:32,910
I feel bad about hanging Penny
out to dry.
381
00:16:32,912 --> 00:16:36,046
The truth is,
I don't like the dress, either.
382
00:16:37,016 --> 00:16:39,049
Are you kidding me?
383
00:16:39,051 --> 00:16:40,951
Now Bernadette doesn't
like the dress?
384
00:16:40,953 --> 00:16:43,353
Oh, she is the worst.
385
00:16:47,259 --> 00:16:49,560
Anyone seen Sheldon?
386
00:16:49,562 --> 00:16:51,728
Last time I saw Sheldon
was this morning.
387
00:16:51,730 --> 00:16:55,566
Careful. Don't say his
name a third time.
388
00:16:55,568 --> 00:16:58,469
You don't think he actually went
to Las Vegas, do you?
389
00:16:59,939 --> 00:17:01,438
Five red.
390
00:17:02,708 --> 00:17:04,842
This is it.
391
00:17:04,844 --> 00:17:07,144
- Is everything okay, sir?
- Oh. Hi.
392
00:17:07,146 --> 00:17:08,479
It's better than okay.
393
00:17:08,481 --> 00:17:11,081
I am a physicist, and I have
been observing this wheel
394
00:17:11,083 --> 00:17:14,051
for hours and running
a chi-square analysis,
395
00:17:14,053 --> 00:17:16,620
which is how I know that
the ball is far more likely
396
00:17:16,622 --> 00:17:18,789
to land on 32, 17 or five.
397
00:17:18,791 --> 00:17:21,358
So if you could hold off
on replacing this wheel,
398
00:17:21,360 --> 00:17:23,026
I'd like to make
several large bets.
399
00:17:24,630 --> 00:17:27,798
Well, good for you.
Pelican.
400
00:17:27,800 --> 00:17:28,799
What's pelican?
401
00:17:28,801 --> 00:17:30,701
- Sir, would you come with us?
- Oh, no.
402
00:17:30,703 --> 00:17:32,970
I have to place my bet first.
This is for science.
403
00:17:32,972 --> 00:17:37,441
- 17 black.
- No! No!
404
00:17:43,035 --> 00:17:45,669
Oh, guess who's no longer
allowed to set foot in...?
405
00:17:45,671 --> 00:17:49,073
Wow!
406
00:17:50,376 --> 00:17:52,610
You look beautiful.
407
00:17:54,480 --> 00:17:56,280
Really?
408
00:17:56,282 --> 00:17:58,449
'Cause I was gonna return it.
409
00:17:58,451 --> 00:18:01,051
Why would you return it?
410
00:18:01,053 --> 00:18:04,722
You look like a pile of swans.
411
00:18:07,660 --> 00:18:10,461
I'm so glad you like it...
412
00:18:10,463 --> 00:18:15,232
because... it's gonna be
my wedding dress.
413
00:18:15,234 --> 00:18:18,402
I can't wait to marry you.
414
00:18:21,474 --> 00:18:23,808
Why do you smell
like smoke?
415
00:18:25,645 --> 00:18:27,745
I was in Vegas.
416
00:18:27,747 --> 00:18:28,946
Vegas?
417
00:18:28,948 --> 00:18:32,049
I'm sorry. Las Vegas.
418
00:18:34,299 --> 00:18:41,199
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man