1
00:00:02,103 --> 00:00:05,188
Look at us. Getting ready for a double date
2
00:00:05,256 --> 00:00:07,324
with actual women who publicly acknowledge
3
00:00:07,391 --> 00:00:09,826
they're our girlfriends.
4
00:00:09,894 --> 00:00:13,196
Yes, actual women are the best.
5
00:00:13,264 --> 00:00:14,264
I don't understand.
6
00:00:14,332 --> 00:00:15,665
What other kind of women are there?
7
00:00:15,733 --> 00:00:18,668
Howard, artificial women
are your department.
8
00:00:18,736 --> 00:00:21,671
You want to take this?
9
00:00:21,739 --> 00:00:24,708
No, it would just freak him out.
10
00:00:24,775 --> 00:00:27,210
Listen, before we leave,
11
00:00:27,278 --> 00:00:30,213
I should warn you, I'm a passionate man
12
00:00:30,281 --> 00:00:33,750
and I tend towards public
displays of affection.
13
00:00:33,818 --> 00:00:37,654
What are you trying to tell me, Howard?
14
00:00:37,722 --> 00:00:40,357
There might be some making out
in the car or the restaurant,
15
00:00:40,424 --> 00:00:42,259
and I don't want Bernadette
to feel uncomfortable,
16
00:00:42,326 --> 00:00:46,096
so it would help if you
and Penny made out, too.
17
00:00:46,164 --> 00:00:48,098
Don't worry.
18
00:00:48,166 --> 00:00:50,390
We're planning to have sex
right on the salad bar.
19
00:00:52,860 --> 00:00:54,394
Namaste, white people.
20
00:00:55,930 --> 00:00:57,096
Good news!
21
00:00:57,164 --> 00:01:00,400
I rented us the fou
r-hour edition of Watchmen.
22
00:01:00,467 --> 00:01:01,334
Got it. Seen it.
23
00:01:01,402 --> 00:01:03,836
Detailed analysis posted online.
24
00:01:03,904 --> 00:01:06,205
Well, then what are we going to do tonight?
25
00:01:06,273 --> 00:01:07,440
Uh, sorry, Raj.
26
00:01:07,508 --> 00:01:08,641
Howard and I are going out to dinner
27
00:01:08,709 --> 00:01:10,009
with Penny and Bernadette. Yeah.
28
00:01:10,077 --> 00:01:12,712
No more carefree bachelor
nights for me and Leonard.
29
00:01:12,780 --> 00:01:15,248
These broncos have been saddled.
30
00:01:15,316 --> 00:01:17,317
(whinnying, huffing)
31
00:01:20,154 --> 00:01:22,121
How did we get actual women?
32
00:01:22,189 --> 00:01:24,123
Great.
33
00:01:24,191 --> 00:01:26,025
They get girlfriends,
and they just abandon us?
34
00:01:26,093 --> 00:01:27,994
It is great, isn't it?
35
00:01:29,330 --> 00:01:31,397
We have a wonderful evening
ahead of us. We do?
36
00:01:31,465 --> 00:01:33,566
Oh, yes. I just discovered I don't have
37
00:01:33,634 --> 00:01:35,902
enough room on my hard drive
for a Linux partition,
38
00:01:35,970 --> 00:01:38,237
so you and I are going
to perform a full backup,
39
00:01:38,305 --> 00:01:41,574
reinitialize and then reinstall
all my operating systems.
40
00:01:41,642 --> 00:01:44,043
I don't want to do that.
41
00:01:44,111 --> 00:01:45,378
All right.
42
00:01:45,446 --> 00:01:47,380
Well, I'm going to perform full backup,
43
00:01:47,448 --> 00:01:50,883
reinitialize and then reinstall
all my operating systems.
44
00:01:50,951 --> 00:01:51,985
What about me?
45
00:01:52,052 --> 00:01:53,987
Well, I understand
46
00:01:54,054 --> 00:01:56,956
there are several types of artificial women.
47
00:01:58,325 --> 00:02:00,426
Maybe you should look into that.
48
00:02:02,162 --> 00:02:05,698
* Our whole universe was
in a hot, dense state *
49
00:02:05,766 --> 00:02:09,524
* Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! *
50
00:02:09,592 --> 00:02:10,259
* The Earth began to cool *
51
00:02:10,327 --> 00:02:12,828
* The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools *
52
00:02:12,896 --> 00:02:15,364
* We built the Wall * *
We built the pyramids *
53
00:02:15,432 --> 00:02:18,034
* Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery *
54
00:02:18,101 --> 00:02:19,936
* That all started with a big bang *
55
00:02:19,638 --> 00:02:23,638
Sync by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
56
00:02:23,922 --> 00:02:25,523
Dude, there's so many cool things
57
00:02:25,591 --> 00:02:27,392
we could be doing tonight. Look.
58
00:02:27,459 --> 00:02:29,227
At the Glendale Galleria,
59
00:02:29,295 --> 00:02:31,229
"Put on your best zoot suit,
60
00:02:31,297 --> 00:02:34,132
"it's a salute to Swing music
in the center court near Macy's.
61
00:02:34,199 --> 00:02:35,300
5:00 p.m. to 9 p.m."
62
00:02:35,367 --> 00:02:37,302
Huh? Huh?
63
00:02:37,369 --> 00:01:38,193
A salute to zoot.
64
00:02:40,061 --> 00:02:41,029
Sounds like a hoot.
65
00:02:41,596 --> 00:02:42,963
I'm sorry, Raj,
66
00:02:43,031 --> 00:02:46,000
I have no desire to salute any
article of clothing tonight.
67
00:02:46,067 --> 00:02:49,503
Much less one that's linked
to race riots in the 1940s.
68
00:02:49,571 --> 00:02:50,604
Race riots?
69
00:02:50,672 --> 00:02:52,973
The zoot suit riots.
70
00:02:53,041 --> 00:02:55,643
Oh.
71
00:02:55,710 --> 00:02:59,847
I always thought that was some
sort of after-Christmas sale.
72
00:03:01,850 --> 00:03:03,784
Well, then why don't we just go
to the galleria and walk around?
73
00:03:03,852 --> 00:03:05,786
But I don't need anything at the Galleria.
74
00:03:05,854 --> 00:03:07,454
Do you need anything at the Galleria?
75
00:03:07,522 --> 00:03:09,356
No. We would just walk
around and see what's what.
76
00:03:11,393 --> 00:03:14,795
That's a semantically null sentence.
77
00:03:14,863 --> 00:03:17,298
Okay, well, how about this?
78
00:03:17,365 --> 00:03:19,133
From the university Web site:
79
00:03:19,200 --> 00:03:22,136
"7:00 p.m. to 10:00 p.m.
, Norton Hall Multipurpose Room,
80
00:03:22,203 --> 00:03:24,805
"mixer for grad students and faculty
81
00:03:24,873 --> 00:03:27,308
"of the science and humanities departments.
82
00:03:27,375 --> 00:03:29,310
"Whether you split atoms or infinitives,
83
00:03:29,377 --> 00:03:32,212
this is the place to be."
84
00:03:32,280 --> 00:03:35,482
Well, that's certainly amusing, but...
85
00:03:35,550 --> 00:03:37,518
I have no interest.
86
00:03:37,586 --> 00:03:39,186
Come on, Sheldon,
87
00:03:39,254 --> 00:03:41,522
the world is filled with
people doing things outside.
88
00:03:41,590 --> 00:03:42,856
Let's go outside.
89
00:03:42,924 --> 00:03:45,326
Outside is good.
90
00:03:45,393 --> 00:03:48,329
If outside is so good,
why has mankind spent thousands of years
91
00:03:48,396 --> 00:03:50,097
trying to perfect inside?
92
00:03:50,165 --> 00:03:52,366
I don't know, it's a marketing scheme.
93
00:03:53,802 --> 00:03:55,235
Please, Sheldon, I'm a young,
94
00:03:55,303 --> 00:03:57,360
virile visitor from a foreign land
95
00:03:57,388 --> 00:04:00,657
and I need to strut my stuff.
96
00:04:00,724 --> 00:04:03,026
Let me offer you a compromise.
97
00:04:03,094 --> 00:04:06,563
Sometimes when I feel stifled
and want a change of scenery,
98
00:04:06,630 --> 00:04:09,599
I use my imagination.
99
00:04:09,667 --> 00:04:10,800
Oh, boy.
100
00:04:10,868 --> 00:04:12,669
One of my favorite places
101
00:04:12,736 --> 00:04:14,571
to visit is the two-dimensional world
102
00:04:14,638 --> 00:04:17,073
described in Edwin Abbott's
mathematical fantasy,
103
00:04:17,141 --> 00:04:18,308
"Flatland."
104
00:04:18,375 --> 00:04:20,944
I don't want to go to Flatland.
105
00:04:21,011 --> 00:04:22,946
You're only saying that because
you haven't been there.
106
00:04:23,013 --> 00:04:24,914
(clears throat)
107
00:04:26,117 --> 00:04:29,619
I am now a hexagon in two-dimensional space
108
00:04:29,687 --> 00:04:32,956
and can only perceive the
edges of other objects.
109
00:04:33,023 --> 00:04:35,125
Oy.
110
00:04:35,192 --> 00:04:37,127
Is that you, Raj?
111
00:04:37,194 --> 00:04:39,462
I don't recognize your edge.
112
00:04:39,530 --> 00:04:41,464
Sheldon, I'm begging you.
113
00:04:41,532 --> 00:04:44,134
I want to go to this mixer,
and I don't want to go alone.
114
00:04:44,201 --> 00:04:46,402
Well, you're in luck.
115
00:04:46,470 --> 00:04:49,606
There's a mixer here in Flatland.
116
00:04:51,208 --> 00:04:55,145
Oh, look, there's a sexually
attractive line segment.
117
00:04:55,212 --> 00:04:57,680
You should chat her up.
118
00:04:57,748 --> 00:04:59,182
What? Tell her you're a circle.
119
00:04:59,250 --> 00:05:01,851
Flatland gals are all hot for circles.
120
00:05:04,622 --> 00:05:06,189
I hope you're hungry, Bernadette.
121
00:05:06,257 --> 00:05:07,824
We're going to a terrific restaurant.
122
00:05:07,892 --> 00:05:09,292
Oh, yeah, I'm starved.
123
00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:11,094
When you spend all day in a bio-lab,
124
00:05:11,162 --> 00:05:13,763
watching flesh-eating bacteria
skeletonize small rodents,
125
00:05:13,831 --> 00:05:15,822
it really works up an appetite.
126
00:05:16,890 --> 00:05:18,824
Flesh-eating bacteria.
127
00:05:18,892 --> 00:05:20,826
And yet, I still want to kiss this woman.
128
00:05:20,894 --> 00:05:22,160
What does that tell you?
129
00:05:22,228 --> 00:05:24,162
That you'd be willing
to die a horrible death
130
00:05:24,230 --> 00:05:26,064
on the off-chance you'd get to second base?
131
00:05:27,267 --> 00:05:29,034
Oh, we're way past second base.
132
00:05:29,102 --> 00:05:30,369
Right, Howard?
133
00:05:30,436 --> 00:05:32,704
Well, we kind of disagree
134
00:05:32,772 --> 00:05:35,707
about what the bases are.
135
00:05:35,775 --> 00:05:37,609
How's your work going, Penny?
136
00:05:37,677 --> 00:05:39,111
Any acting jobs?
137
00:05:39,178 --> 00:05:41,280
Well, the last big thing
I did was this production
138
00:05:41,347 --> 00:05:43,682
of Diary of Anne Frank above
a bowling alley.
139
00:05:43,750 --> 00:05:47,252
But I think things might be
turning around pretty soon.
140
00:05:47,320 --> 00:05:49,354
Great. How come?
141
00:05:49,422 --> 00:05:51,556
Well, promise you won't make fun of me.
142
00:05:51,624 --> 00:05:53,992
Of course, I would never make fun of you.
143
00:05:54,060 --> 00:05:55,494
(sighs) Okay.
144
00:05:55,561 --> 00:05:58,497
Well, I went to this psychic who
told me that if I cut my hair,
145
00:05:58,564 --> 00:06:00,565
I'm going to get a national commercial.
146
00:06:00,633 --> 00:06:02,234
(guffawing)
147
00:06:02,302 --> 00:06:03,936
Wh... Seriously?
148
00:06:04,003 --> 00:06:06,939
You're getting career advice from a psychic?
149
00:06:07,006 --> 00:06:10,375
Good job not making fun of her.
150
00:06:10,443 --> 00:06:12,544
She's not one of those phonies, okay.
151
00:06:12,612 --> 00:06:15,047
She wrote a book and has her own Web site.
152
00:06:15,114 --> 00:06:16,281
Oh, gee, why didn't you say so?
153
00:06:16,349 --> 00:06:18,717
They don't let just anyone have a Web site.
154
00:06:18,785 --> 00:06:21,219
Why are you being such a jerk?
155
00:06:21,287 --> 00:06:22,521
You're surprised?
156
00:06:22,588 --> 00:06:24,823
Your psychic tell you I
was going to be a jerk?
157
00:06:24,891 --> 00:06:27,092
(sarcastic laugh) Bite me.
158
00:06:28,628 --> 00:06:29,895
Come on, Penny.
159
00:06:29,963 --> 00:06:31,563
Why don't you kids go ahead and chat?
160
00:06:31,631 --> 00:06:32,354
We're gonna make out back here.
161
00:06:37,092 --> 00:06:39,960
I'm sliding into third.
162
00:06:43,265 --> 00:06:44,466
Thanks for coming with me.
163
00:06:44,533 --> 00:06:45,800
Thanks for giving me
164
00:06:45,868 --> 00:06:48,003
your limited edition Green Lantern
lantern.
165
00:06:48,070 --> 00:06:50,605
Did you really have to bring it in with you?
166
00:06:50,673 --> 00:06:53,675
What if evil strikes and
my power ring runs low?
167
00:06:58,414 --> 00:07:00,348
Come on, let's get a drink. I don't drink.
168
00:07:00,416 --> 00:07:01,750
Yeah, well I do.
169
00:07:01,817 --> 00:07:04,019
And when my wingman is carrying
a Green Lantern lantern,
170
00:07:04,086 --> 00:07:05,620
I drink a lot.
171
00:07:05,688 --> 00:07:07,622
I'll have a screwdriver, please.
172
00:07:07,690 --> 00:07:10,025
Don't be chintzy with the screw.
173
00:07:10,092 --> 00:07:12,727
I would like a root beer float.
174
00:07:12,795 --> 00:07:15,697
Sheldon, they don't have ice cream.
175
00:07:15,765 --> 00:07:17,532
They don't?
176
00:07:17,600 --> 00:07:19,434
Well, apparently,
these people and I differ greatly
177
00:07:19,502 --> 00:07:21,469
on the definition of "party."
178
00:07:21,537 --> 00:07:23,805
He'll have a Shirley Temple.
179
00:07:23,873 --> 00:07:25,874
And don't be chintzy with the Shirley.
180
00:07:29,078 --> 00:07:31,046
Okay,
181
00:07:31,113 --> 00:07:32,714
let's check out the females.
182
00:07:32,782 --> 00:07:34,049
All right.
183
00:07:34,116 --> 00:07:35,984
There's a female.
184
00:07:36,052 --> 00:07:37,519
That's Professor Wilkinson's wife.
185
00:07:37,586 --> 00:07:38,820
She's like 80 years old.
186
00:07:38,888 --> 00:07:40,655
But she's female.
187
00:07:40,723 --> 00:07:42,157
Isn't that the game? No.
188
00:07:42,224 --> 00:07:43,725
I'm looking for a hookup.
189
00:07:43,793 --> 00:07:45,560
Oh, yes.
190
00:07:45,628 --> 00:07:47,062
So, the point of this exercise is
191
00:07:47,129 --> 00:07:49,731
for you to find someone to copulate with?
192
00:07:49,799 --> 00:07:51,232
Not so loud,
193
00:07:51,300 --> 00:07:52,390
but ideally, yes.
194
00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:56,693
Thanks.
195
00:07:56,761 --> 00:07:58,495
Thank you.
196
00:07:58,563 --> 00:08:00,831
And what is my function as "wingman?"
197
00:08:00,899 --> 00:08:02,466
You help me run my game.
198
00:08:02,533 --> 00:08:03,500
Okay.
199
00:08:03,568 --> 00:08:07,037
What is your game?
200
00:08:07,105 --> 00:08:09,239
When I lie through my teeth to a woman,
201
00:08:09,307 --> 00:08:11,308
you nod and agree.
202
00:08:12,410 --> 00:08:13,877
Hey, that's pretty cool.
203
00:08:13,945 --> 00:08:15,012
What is it?
204
00:08:15,079 --> 00:08:16,513
It's a limited edition
205
00:08:16,581 --> 00:08:18,015
Green Lantern lantern.
206
00:08:18,082 --> 00:08:21,852
My friend is looking for
someone to copulate with.
207
00:08:21,920 --> 00:08:23,654
You're very funny.
208
00:08:23,721 --> 00:08:24,688
I'm Abby.
209
00:08:24,756 --> 00:08:26,690
I'm Sheldon. How do you do?
210
00:08:26,758 --> 00:08:28,692
Rajesh Ramayan Koothrappali.
211
00:08:28,760 --> 00:08:30,360
Call me Raj. Hi, Raj.
212
00:08:30,428 --> 00:08:31,695
Where are you from?
213
00:08:31,763 --> 00:08:34,031
The mysterious subcontinent of India.
214
00:08:34,098 --> 00:08:35,365
Ooh, India.
215
00:08:35,433 --> 00:08:37,534
You know India? I saw Slumdog
Millionaire.
216
00:08:37,602 --> 00:08:40,270
Well, I'm a slumdog astrophysicist.
217
00:08:42,373 --> 00:08:44,574
I thought your father was a gynecologist.
218
00:08:45,643 --> 00:08:46,944
I'm sorry.
219
00:08:50,682 --> 00:08:51,949
Martha, come here.
220
00:08:52,016 --> 00:08:53,283
Meet Raj and Sheldon.
221
00:08:53,351 --> 00:08:54,718
This is my friend, Martha. Hi.
222
00:08:54,786 --> 00:08:55,986
Hello. Hello.
223
00:08:56,054 --> 00:08:57,821
Is that the limited edition
224
00:08:57,889 --> 00:08:59,489
Green Lantern lantern?
225
00:08:59,557 --> 00:09:02,659
"In brightest day, in darkest night,
226
00:09:02,727 --> 00:09:04,728
no evil shall escape my sight."
227
00:09:07,365 --> 00:09:09,323
Oh, that is so awesome.
228
00:09:10,691 --> 00:09:11,924
Thank you.
229
00:09:11,992 --> 00:09:14,327
Have you chosen one to copulate with?
230
00:09:26,907 --> 00:09:30,576
So, what should we talk about?
231
00:09:31,745 --> 00:09:33,679
Well, we could always learn more
232
00:09:33,747 --> 00:09:36,048
about why people who believe
in psychics are idiots.
233
00:09:36,116 --> 00:09:37,383
Leonard?
234
00:09:40,721 --> 00:09:42,655
Oh, we don't need to
talk about that anymore.
235
00:09:42,723 --> 00:09:45,191
Leonard covered it pretty well in the car.
236
00:09:45,259 --> 00:09:48,628
I'm sorry, but facts are facts.
237
00:09:48,695 --> 00:09:50,329
Right, and if you can't understand it,
238
00:09:50,397 --> 00:09:51,964
it's not a fact.
239
00:09:52,032 --> 00:09:55,134
No, if it's not a fact, it's not a fact.
240
00:09:55,202 --> 00:09:56,135
Oh, got it.
241
00:09:56,203 --> 00:09:57,336
Thank you for educating me.
242
00:09:57,404 --> 00:10:00,606
You're welcome.
243
00:10:00,674 --> 00:10:01,741
How's your fish?
244
00:10:01,809 --> 00:10:02,742
Amazing.
245
00:10:02,810 --> 00:10:04,043
Would you like to try some?
246
00:10:04,111 --> 00:10:05,211
Yeah, sure. Well, the fact is,
247
00:10:05,279 --> 00:10:07,380
you can't.
248
00:10:07,448 --> 00:10:10,183
Come on, Howard, Bernadette,
you're both scientists.
249
00:10:10,250 --> 00:10:11,517
Help me out here.
250
00:10:11,585 --> 00:10:12,919
What do you think-- want to jump
251
00:10:12,986 --> 00:10:14,187
right in the middle of
another couple's argument?
252
00:10:14,254 --> 00:10:15,188
No, thank you.
253
00:10:15,255 --> 00:10:16,556
Sorry.
254
00:10:17,758 --> 00:10:20,893
Maybe we should just
stop talking about this.
255
00:10:20,961 --> 00:10:23,896
Maybe some of us should
stop talking altogether.
256
00:10:23,964 --> 00:10:25,898
How is everything tonight?
257
00:10:25,966 --> 00:10:28,067
Really uncomfortable.
258
00:10:30,994 --> 00:10:32,695
You know, the best thing
about being in a committed,
259
00:10:32,763 --> 00:10:34,663
monogamous, mutually supportive relationship
260
00:10:34,731 --> 00:10:36,565
is that even if you have different ideas,
261
00:10:36,633 --> 00:10:39,201
you can have a spirited debate,
yet still care for,
262
00:10:39,269 --> 00:10:41,437
(door slamming) even make love with...
263
00:10:43,473 --> 00:10:46,108
Want your fish?
264
00:10:49,446 --> 00:10:51,013
I knew you were going to do that.
265
00:10:51,081 --> 00:10:52,581
Doesn't make me psychic!
266
00:10:54,618 --> 00:10:57,953
Attaboy, Leonard, make it worse.
267
00:10:58,955 --> 00:11:01,157
* American woman *
268
00:11:01,224 --> 00:11:05,261
* Listen what I say... *
269
00:11:06,296 --> 00:11:08,230
What's going on?
270
00:11:08,298 --> 00:11:11,100
We scored.
271
00:11:12,202 --> 00:11:14,303
I'm the wingman.
272
00:11:14,371 --> 00:11:16,705
* American woman. *
273
00:11:22,213 --> 00:11:23,014
Hey.
274
00:11:23,081 --> 00:11:25,683
Laser. Had a great night last night.
275
00:11:25,751 --> 00:11:27,852
I don't like to kiss and tell,
276
00:11:27,920 --> 00:11:30,922
but somebody made it to eighth base.
277
00:11:32,724 --> 00:11:35,092
What the hell is eighth base?
278
00:11:35,160 --> 00:11:37,195
Seventh base with shirt off.
279
00:11:38,330 --> 00:11:40,865
Well, my shirt.
280
00:11:40,933 --> 00:11:42,200
How'd things go
281
00:11:42,267 --> 00:11:43,201
with Penny?
282
00:11:43,268 --> 00:11:44,869
Oh... couldn't be better.
283
00:11:50,097 --> 00:11:50,830
Are we taking
284
00:11:50,898 --> 00:11:54,501
our relationship frustrations
out on innocent Cylons?
285
00:11:54,569 --> 00:11:55,802
It's not just Cylons.
286
00:11:55,870 --> 00:11:57,103
Superman's next.
287
00:11:58,839 --> 00:12:01,474
All right, I was going to try to squeeze in
288
00:12:01,542 --> 00:12:02,909
a little more mocking before lunch,
289
00:12:02,977 --> 00:12:04,144
but I can come back later
290
00:12:04,212 --> 00:12:06,780
when you don't have a high-powered weapon.
291
00:12:06,847 --> 00:12:10,917
How can I go out with a woman
who believes in psychics?
292
00:12:10,985 --> 00:12:12,686
Hey, I once dated a girl
293
00:12:12,753 --> 00:12:15,021
who believed she was abducted by aliens.
294
00:12:15,089 --> 00:12:16,523
And that didn't bother you?
295
00:12:16,591 --> 00:12:17,924
Au contraire.
296
00:12:17,992 --> 00:12:20,860
It meant she was gullible and
open to a little probing.
297
00:12:20,928 --> 00:12:23,163
What am I supposed to do,
298
00:12:23,231 --> 00:12:25,765
pretend I believe something I
don't whenever I'm with Penny?
299
00:12:25,833 --> 00:12:28,835
Hey, I'm sure Penny fakes
all kinds of things
300
00:12:28,903 --> 00:12:31,371
when she's with you.
301
00:12:31,439 --> 00:12:35,242
Do me a favor-- lean over,
put your head right here.
302
00:12:35,309 --> 00:12:38,311
Let me show you another way to look at this.
303
00:12:38,379 --> 00:12:42,315
Here we have the universe of all women.
304
00:12:42,383 --> 00:12:43,450
These are the ones
305
00:12:43,517 --> 00:12:44,818
you want to sleep with.
306
00:12:44,885 --> 00:12:47,954
These are the women who believe
exactly what you believe.
307
00:12:48,022 --> 00:12:50,690
These are the women who would
be willing to sleep with you.
308
00:12:52,693 --> 00:12:55,629
And right there in the
little triple intersection...
309
00:12:55,696 --> 00:12:57,063
is your ideal mate.
310
00:12:57,131 --> 00:13:00,000
Odds are she's a short
physicist with low self-esteem
311
00:13:00,067 --> 00:13:03,236
who lives in a government
research facility in China.
312
00:13:03,304 --> 00:13:05,572
What's your point?
313
00:13:05,640 --> 00:13:08,164
In order to keep having a
sexual relationship with Penny,
314
00:13:08,181 --> 00:13:10,082
I have to give up everything I believe in--
315
00:13:10,150 --> 00:13:11,817
my intellectual integrity, the very nature
316
00:13:11,885 --> 00:13:13,519
of who I am?
317
00:13:13,587 --> 00:13:15,588
I can't do that, Howard.
318
00:13:15,655 --> 00:13:17,456
I respect that.
319
00:13:20,327 --> 00:13:21,327
What is that?
320
00:13:21,394 --> 00:13:22,528
Your new girlfriend.
321
00:13:23,563 --> 00:13:25,064
Have fun tonight.
322
00:13:28,135 --> 00:13:30,703
The dog...
323
00:13:30,771 --> 00:13:33,806
koira.
324
00:13:33,874 --> 00:13:36,342
The roof...
325
00:13:36,409 --> 00:13:39,512
katto.
326
00:13:39,579 --> 00:13:43,249
Grapes...
327
00:13:43,316 --> 00:13:45,484
ryp leet.
328
00:13:47,087 --> 00:13:48,187
(knocking)
329
00:13:48,255 --> 00:13:50,089
One minute.
330
00:13:51,825 --> 00:13:54,126
Sis n.
331
00:13:54,194 --> 00:13:56,395
What was that?
332
00:13:56,463 --> 00:13:57,797
It means "come in."
333
00:13:57,864 --> 00:13:59,098
It's taking forever to load
334
00:13:59,166 --> 00:14:01,267
the new operating system on my computer.
335
00:14:01,334 --> 00:14:03,602
I disinfected the kitchen and the bathroom,
336
00:14:03,670 --> 00:14:06,539
and now I thought I'd learn Finnish.
337
00:14:06,606 --> 00:14:08,641
(speaking Hindi)
338
00:14:09,543 --> 00:14:11,043
That's Hindi for
339
00:14:11,111 --> 00:14:12,711
"Whatever floats your boat."
340
00:14:12,779 --> 00:14:15,881
Uh, listen, I got a text
from that girl Abby,
341
00:14:15,949 --> 00:14:18,551
and she and her friend Martha
want to hang out with us again.
342
00:14:18,618 --> 00:14:19,552
What do you say?
343
00:14:19,619 --> 00:14:21,320
I don't say anything.
344
00:14:21,388 --> 00:14:23,022
I merely offer you a facial expression
345
00:14:23,089 --> 00:14:24,547
that suggests you've gone insane.
346
00:14:27,399 --> 00:14:27,999
I don't get it.
347
00:14:28,007 --> 00:14:29,074
You had a great time.
348
00:14:29,141 --> 00:14:31,276
Yes, exactly, I had a great time.
349
00:14:31,344 --> 00:14:33,378
That's done; I've moved on to other things.
350
00:14:33,446 --> 00:14:35,013
For example, after I learn Finnish,
351
00:14:35,081 --> 00:14:36,648
I'm not going to learn Finnish again.
352
00:14:36,716 --> 00:14:40,051
Please, Sheldon, I'm a lost Indian boy
353
00:14:40,119 --> 00:14:42,954
far from home, and I want a girlfriend
354
00:14:43,022 --> 00:14:44,389
and I want her to be Abby,
355
00:14:44,457 --> 00:14:46,291
and she'll only come over
if she can bring Martha.
356
00:14:46,359 --> 00:14:49,294
Raj, I highly doubt there is
any argument you can make,
357
00:14:49,362 --> 00:14:52,564
threat you might levy, rhetorical strategy,
358
00:14:52,632 --> 00:14:54,165
plea, invocation,
359
00:14:54,233 --> 00:14:57,636
supplication, or... vetoomus
360
00:14:57,703 --> 00:15:02,407
that you can employ that would
convince me to reconsider.
361
00:15:02,475 --> 00:15:05,076
(sighs)
362
00:15:15,588 --> 00:15:20,258
My Incredible Hulk hands signed by Stan
Lee.
363
00:15:21,260 --> 00:15:23,061
Oh, my.
364
00:15:40,746 --> 00:15:43,371
I've admired these for years.
365
00:15:44,439 --> 00:15:46,240
So does that mean we can
go with the girls again?
366
00:15:46,307 --> 00:15:50,410
Hulk agree to second date with puny humans!
367
00:15:53,881 --> 00:15:56,183
You can't wear the hands on the date.
368
00:15:58,219 --> 00:16:01,488
Hulk sad.
369
00:16:03,825 --> 00:16:06,193
Hey.
370
00:16:08,162 --> 00:16:12,399
Cleaning out the old dryer lint, huh?
371
00:16:12,467 --> 00:16:13,900
Not only is it courteous,
372
00:16:13,968 --> 00:16:15,235
it's safety smart.
373
00:16:15,303 --> 00:16:17,271
Every year, 15,000 fires are caused
374
00:16:17,338 --> 00:16:21,208
by accidental dryer lint ignition.
375
00:16:21,276 --> 00:16:22,276
Now you're supposed to say,
376
00:16:22,343 --> 00:16:24,211
"Wow, what an interesting fact.
377
00:16:24,279 --> 00:16:26,313
"Come here, you crazy, nerdy guy.
378
00:16:26,381 --> 00:16:28,415
I could never be mad at you."
379
00:16:28,483 --> 00:16:30,984
Wow, that's all you got
380
00:16:31,052 --> 00:16:32,786
after you were the most obnoxious person
381
00:16:32,854 --> 00:16:36,790
on a double date that
included Howard Wolowitz?
382
00:16:38,192 --> 00:16:39,593
No, I'm sorry.
383
00:16:39,661 --> 00:16:41,261
I really am. It's not right
384
00:16:41,329 --> 00:16:44,197
to mock what a person believes in.
385
00:16:44,265 --> 00:16:45,399
Thank you.
386
00:16:45,466 --> 00:16:47,267
Would you be willing to go to my psychic
387
00:16:47,335 --> 00:16:48,869
and see what it's all about?
388
00:16:48,936 --> 00:16:50,504
Would you be willing to read a book
389
00:16:50,571 --> 00:16:53,373
that concisely explains how
all psychics are frauds?
390
00:16:53,441 --> 00:16:55,742
I would not.
391
00:17:00,548 --> 00:17:02,939
Okay, let's go see your psychic.
392
00:17:03,007 --> 00:17:04,074
Really?
393
00:17:04,141 --> 00:17:06,576
Well, yeah, one of us has
to keep an open mind.
394
00:17:06,644 --> 00:17:07,844
You saying I don't have an open mind?
395
00:17:07,912 --> 00:17:09,746
No, n-not at all.
Let me help you with this stuff.
396
00:17:09,814 --> 00:17:13,450
You know, I believe in ghosts, too.
397
00:17:13,517 --> 00:17:15,151
Great. And astrology.
398
00:17:15,219 --> 00:17:19,155
I know, and pyramid power
and healing crystals.
399
00:17:19,223 --> 00:17:22,659
Oh, no, no, no, crystals don't work.
400
00:17:22,727 --> 00:17:25,662
Really, that's the line?
401
00:17:25,730 --> 00:17:28,331
Psychics are real, but crystals are voodoo?
402
00:17:28,399 --> 00:17:29,666
Oh, voodoo's real.
403
00:17:29,734 --> 00:17:32,168
You don't want to mess with voodoo.
404
00:17:34,505 --> 00:17:37,140
Flatland is more than just a
mathematical essay.
405
00:17:37,208 --> 00:17:40,343
It is also a treatise on
Victorian social mores.
406
00:17:40,411 --> 00:17:42,312
You know, I had never considered that.
407
00:17:42,380 --> 00:17:44,981
(chuckles)
408
00:17:46,117 --> 00:17:48,051
Wow, that's going to
409
00:17:48,119 --> 00:17:50,353
completely change my visits there.
410
00:17:50,421 --> 00:17:52,689
(laughing)
411
00:17:59,363 --> 00:18:01,598
Well, it's late.
412
00:18:01,666 --> 00:18:02,799
Uh-huh.
413
00:18:02,867 --> 00:18:04,367
Time for bed.
414
00:18:04,435 --> 00:18:07,604
(laughing): Okay.
415
00:18:08,639 --> 00:18:11,007
Good night, puny human!
416
00:18:20,073 --> 00:18:22,541
Sheldon?
417
00:18:28,914 --> 00:18:29,848
Yes?
418
00:18:29,916 --> 00:18:31,251
Listen, they're kind of
419
00:18:32,319 --> 00:18:34,243
getting busy in the living room, and...
420
00:18:34,261 --> 00:18:37,163
I was wondering if I could
hang out in here for a while.
421
00:18:38,198 --> 00:18:40,132
Well, I suppose.
422
00:18:40,200 --> 00:18:41,333
Come in.
423
00:18:46,840 --> 00:18:49,107
I'll sleep in Leonard's room. Good night.
424
00:18:49,108 --> 00:18:59,108
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