1
00:00:00,494 --> 00:00:02,778
You feel like trying
something new for dinner?
2
00:00:02,779 --> 00:00:05,080
Maybe Indian, Tex-Mex?
3
00:00:05,082 --> 00:00:07,216
You ever wonder how
humans would be different
4
00:00:07,218 --> 00:00:10,419
if they evolved from lizards
instead of mammals?
5
00:00:12,455 --> 00:00:14,673
Okay, let's talk
about that.
6
00:00:16,092 --> 00:00:18,811
As you know, lizards--
cold-blooded animals--
7
00:00:18,813 --> 00:00:20,896
lack the ability to
sense temperature.
8
00:00:20,898 --> 00:00:23,816
But they do move more
sluggishly when it's cold.
9
00:00:23,818 --> 00:00:26,485
So, lizard weathermen
would say things like,
10
00:00:26,487 --> 00:00:29,771
"Bring a sweater,
it's slow outside."
11
00:00:31,774 --> 00:00:34,860
I love my mind.
12
00:00:34,862 --> 00:00:36,411
We all do.
13
00:00:36,413 --> 00:00:37,812
Now, how about dinner?
14
00:00:37,814 --> 00:00:42,034
Oh, I would assume we'd enjoy
insects or smaller lizards.
15
00:00:42,036 --> 00:00:44,036
We could also pull each other's
tails off and grill them;
16
00:00:44,038 --> 00:00:46,038
they'll just grow back.
17
00:00:48,758 --> 00:00:49,824
Oh!
18
00:00:49,826 --> 00:00:53,712
My life-size cardboard
Mr. Spock is here!
19
00:00:53,714 --> 00:00:57,349
I know he wouldn't care for
an outburst of human emotion,
20
00:00:57,351 --> 00:01:00,185
but, oh, goodie, oh,
goodie, oh, goodie.
21
00:01:01,504 --> 00:01:06,675
Commander Spock requesting
permission to be unfolded.
22
00:01:06,677 --> 00:01:07,676
Excuse me.
23
00:01:07,678 --> 00:01:10,178
Permission granted, Commander.
24
00:01:11,781 --> 00:01:14,366
Which is why the more
intelligent the monkey,
25
00:01:14,368 --> 00:01:16,985
the more feces they fling.
26
00:01:18,488 --> 00:01:20,455
Excuse me, Amy.
27
00:01:20,457 --> 00:01:22,491
Penny, do you have plans
for dinner tonight?
28
00:01:22,493 --> 00:01:23,858
Why, you guys going somewhere?
29
00:01:23,860 --> 00:01:24,993
No, I mean just you and me.
30
00:01:24,995 --> 00:01:28,247
You mean, like a date?
31
00:01:28,249 --> 00:01:30,165
Not like a date, a date.
32
00:01:30,167 --> 00:01:34,336
Ooh...!
Ooh...!
33
00:01:34,338 --> 00:01:38,340
Um... o-okay.
34
00:01:38,342 --> 00:01:39,341
Sure.
35
00:01:39,343 --> 00:01:42,978
Ooh...!
Ooh...!
36
00:01:42,980 --> 00:01:44,229
Oh, no!
37
00:01:44,231 --> 00:01:47,282
They sent the wrong Spock!
38
00:01:48,401 --> 00:01:52,020
Live long and suck it,
Zachary Quinto.
39
00:01:52,021 --> 00:01:54,221
The Big Bang Theory 5x13
The Recombination Hypothesis
Original Air Date on January 19, 2012
40
00:01:54,222 --> 00:01:56,222
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
41
00:01:56,263 --> 00:01:58,381
This is so exciting.
42
00:01:58,383 --> 00:02:00,049
If Leonard and Penny
get back together,
43
00:02:00,051 --> 00:02:02,268
Howard and I can go on
double dates with them.
44
00:02:02,270 --> 00:02:06,222
How come you never invite
Sheldon and me on a double date?
45
00:02:06,224 --> 00:02:09,558
Mm, uh...
46
00:02:09,560 --> 00:02:11,544
How's it going
in there, Penny?!
47
00:02:11,546 --> 00:02:13,546
Just a sec.
48
00:02:14,398 --> 00:02:17,400
Too much?
49
00:02:17,402 --> 00:02:19,568
Yes.
No.
50
00:02:21,138 --> 00:02:24,073
Okay, just hang on.
51
00:02:24,075 --> 00:02:27,877
You just can't handle
her raw sexuality, can you?
52
00:02:27,879 --> 00:02:30,996
When did you and Leonard
break up?
53
00:02:30,998 --> 00:02:32,765
Uh, about two years ago.
54
00:02:32,767 --> 00:02:35,050
Why do you think
he asked you out again?
55
00:02:35,052 --> 00:02:36,001
I don't know.
56
00:02:36,003 --> 00:02:37,236
Maybe he's dying.
57
00:02:37,238 --> 00:02:39,388
That would be so romantic.
58
00:02:39,390 --> 00:02:41,507
He's not dying.
59
00:02:41,509 --> 00:02:43,459
Too bad.
60
00:02:43,461 --> 00:02:45,961
If he were, she could just
throw him in bed
61
00:02:45,963 --> 00:02:49,115
and ride him
right up until he flatlines.
62
00:02:51,985 --> 00:02:54,653
How about this?
63
00:02:54,655 --> 00:02:57,673
Maybe.
Come on.
64
00:02:57,675 --> 00:03:00,526
Yeah, okay, no.
65
00:03:00,528 --> 00:03:02,661
Do you think
you'll sleep with him tonight?
66
00:03:02,663 --> 00:03:03,996
Absolutely not.
67
00:03:03,998 --> 00:03:05,331
Look, we're just
gonna have dinner
68
00:03:05,333 --> 00:03:07,116
and, you know,
see how it goes.
69
00:03:07,118 --> 00:03:09,368
If he were dying,
would you sleep with him?
70
00:03:09,370 --> 00:03:10,986
What?!
71
00:03:10,988 --> 00:03:12,621
Assuming he were
dying of something
72
00:03:12,623 --> 00:03:15,341
that couldn't be
sexually transmitted.
73
00:03:15,343 --> 00:03:18,794
You know, like a spear wound
to the head.
74
00:03:18,796 --> 00:03:20,429
Okay, he is not dying.
75
00:03:20,431 --> 00:03:23,098
How do you know?
Are you a doctor?
76
00:03:23,100 --> 00:03:25,317
You can make-believe, though.
77
00:03:25,319 --> 00:03:28,471
Sometimes Howard and I pretend
that his arrhythmia is acting up
78
00:03:28,473 --> 00:03:30,172
and I'm a sexy cardiologist.
79
00:03:30,174 --> 00:03:35,394
And the naughty part is
I'm not in his HMO network.
80
00:03:37,147 --> 00:03:40,065
Screw it. I'm not gonna
make a big deal out of this.
81
00:03:40,067 --> 00:03:41,567
It's just dinner.
82
00:03:41,569 --> 00:03:43,285
With a dead man.
83
00:03:44,855 --> 00:03:46,822
Amy, stop it.
84
00:03:46,824 --> 00:03:48,207
Oh, God, I'm so nervous.
85
00:03:48,209 --> 00:03:49,492
Relax.
86
00:03:49,494 --> 00:03:51,577
You know Leonard's
always been crazy about you.
87
00:03:51,579 --> 00:03:52,795
It's gonna be great.
88
00:03:52,797 --> 00:03:54,413
I know, but we've finally
gotten to a place
89
00:03:54,415 --> 00:03:56,048
where we can hang out
without it being weird.
90
00:03:56,050 --> 00:03:58,050
And what if something
goes wrong? Then what?
91
00:03:58,052 --> 00:03:59,819
Guess it'll just
be Sheldon and me
92
00:03:59,821 --> 00:04:02,671
going on a double date
with Howard and Bernadette.
93
00:04:02,673 --> 00:04:06,392
Sure, we'd love that.
94
00:04:06,394 --> 00:04:10,095
Change your clothes;
we got a lot riding on this.
95
00:04:15,068 --> 00:04:17,069
Mm...
96
00:04:17,071 --> 00:04:19,622
I want to build a road,
97
00:04:19,624 --> 00:04:22,724
but I need wood.
98
00:04:22,726 --> 00:04:24,960
Do either of you fellows
have wood?
99
00:04:31,251 --> 00:04:33,469
I don't understand the laughter.
100
00:04:34,804 --> 00:04:36,238
The object of Settlers of Catan
101
00:04:36,240 --> 00:04:38,257
is to build roads
and settlements.
102
00:04:38,259 --> 00:04:39,708
To do so requires wood.
103
00:04:39,710 --> 00:04:43,229
Now, I have sheep; I need wood.
104
00:04:45,148 --> 00:04:47,266
Who has wood for my sheep?
105
00:04:50,253 --> 00:04:52,888
Okay, how do I look?
106
00:04:52,890 --> 00:04:55,558
More to the point, why
are you doing this?
107
00:04:55,560 --> 00:04:56,475
What are you talking about?
108
00:04:56,477 --> 00:04:57,943
Did you forget
what Penny did to you?
109
00:04:57,945 --> 00:05:00,195
It took you two years
and defiling my sister
110
00:05:00,197 --> 00:05:02,764
to turn that frown upside down.
111
00:05:02,766 --> 00:05:06,101
I didn't defile your sister,
we had a relationship.
112
00:05:06,103 --> 00:05:09,638
I heard you call her
Brown Sugar.
113
00:05:09,640 --> 00:05:12,474
In my book,
that's defilement.
114
00:05:12,476 --> 00:05:14,009
You want to know my opinion?
115
00:05:14,011 --> 00:05:16,445
Oh, boy, do I!
116
00:05:16,447 --> 00:05:18,614
Sarcasm?
117
00:05:18,616 --> 00:05:20,950
No.
118
00:05:20,952 --> 00:05:23,252
All right, then.
119
00:05:24,487 --> 00:05:25,954
The reason you're fixated on
120
00:05:25,956 --> 00:05:28,674
a good-natured simpleton
like Penny is that
121
00:05:28,676 --> 00:05:32,094
she's the exact opposite of
your first romantic attachment:
122
00:05:32,096 --> 00:05:34,063
your brilliant
yet intimidating mother.
123
00:05:34,065 --> 00:05:36,315
Where on earth
did you get that from?
124
00:05:36,317 --> 00:05:39,685
It's in her book,
Needy Baby, Greedy Baby.
125
00:05:41,521 --> 00:05:43,805
That doesn't make it true.
126
00:05:43,807 --> 00:05:46,525
It's called nonfiction
for a reason, Leonard.
127
00:05:46,527 --> 00:05:48,794
See you later.
128
00:05:49,663 --> 00:05:51,447
If they ever make
a movie version
129
00:05:51,449 --> 00:05:54,033
of that book, you know who
should play Leonard's mother?
130
00:05:54,035 --> 00:05:55,718
Sandra Bullock.
131
00:05:56,336 --> 00:05:57,586
Why?
132
00:05:57,588 --> 00:06:01,440
Because she's great
in everything.
133
00:06:03,993 --> 00:06:06,295
Now, where were we?
134
00:06:06,297 --> 00:06:08,464
Oh, yes.
Does anyone have any wood?
135
00:06:09,517 --> 00:06:10,832
Oh, come on!
136
00:06:10,834 --> 00:06:12,635
I just want wood.
137
00:06:12,637 --> 00:06:14,436
Why are you making it so hard?
138
00:06:23,012 --> 00:06:25,847
So, do they have a name
for a first date
139
00:06:25,849 --> 00:06:27,733
with someone
you used to go out with?
140
00:06:27,735 --> 00:06:29,818
Oh, that's a good question.
141
00:06:29,820 --> 00:06:31,353
How about "awkward"?
142
00:06:31,355 --> 00:06:34,373
Yeah, that sounds right.
143
00:06:34,375 --> 00:06:36,158
Yeah?
144
00:06:36,160 --> 00:06:39,912
Hey, how about if we pretend
we're actually on a first date?
145
00:06:39,914 --> 00:06:41,196
See how that goes.
146
00:06:41,198 --> 00:06:42,214
Okay.
147
00:06:44,335 --> 00:06:46,885
So, Polly,
tell me about yourself.
148
00:06:47,922 --> 00:06:48,921
It's Penny.
149
00:06:48,923 --> 00:06:50,872
Oh, sorry, yeah.
Awkward.
150
00:06:53,210 --> 00:06:54,560
Okay, uh, let's see.
151
00:06:54,562 --> 00:06:57,813
I'm from Nebraska, and ever
since I was a little girl,
152
00:06:57,815 --> 00:07:00,399
I dreamed of moving to L.A.
and becoming a movie star.
153
00:07:00,401 --> 00:07:01,984
Anyway,
154
00:07:01,986 --> 00:07:04,770
after four years of acting
lessons and waiting tables,
155
00:07:04,772 --> 00:07:06,722
I've done
a hemorrhoid commercial
156
00:07:06,724 --> 00:07:09,408
and a production of Anne Frank
above a bowling alley.
157
00:07:10,528 --> 00:07:13,579
So, you know,
dreams do come true.
158
00:07:14,531 --> 00:07:15,497
Your turn.
159
00:07:15,499 --> 00:07:16,565
Uh, let's see.
160
00:07:17,752 --> 00:07:20,068
Uh, I am an experimental
physicist at Cal-Tech,
161
00:07:20,070 --> 00:07:23,338
most of my research is
with high-powered lasers,
162
00:07:23,340 --> 00:07:25,674
and, oh, I've just gotten
a big government grant
163
00:07:25,676 --> 00:07:28,010
to see if they can be used
to knock out
164
00:07:28,012 --> 00:07:29,128
incoming ballistic missiles.
165
00:07:29,130 --> 00:07:30,579
Wow. Can they?
166
00:07:30,581 --> 00:07:32,381
Oh, God, no.
167
00:07:35,918 --> 00:07:37,753
The money's pretty good.
168
00:07:38,938 --> 00:07:42,474
And I used the equipment
to make my own Bat-signal.
169
00:07:43,611 --> 00:07:44,777
Bat-signal?
170
00:07:44,779 --> 00:07:46,228
What are you, some kind of nerd?
171
00:07:46,230 --> 00:07:49,982
Not some kind of nerd,
I'm the king of the nerds.
172
00:07:53,820 --> 00:07:55,454
What does that mean?
173
00:07:55,456 --> 00:07:58,207
Uh, it means
if anyone displeases me,
174
00:07:58,209 --> 00:08:00,809
I don't help them
set up their printer.
175
00:08:02,496 --> 00:08:03,996
You are so funny.
176
00:08:03,998 --> 00:08:05,214
Good.
177
00:08:05,216 --> 00:08:07,132
Remember that
when I take my shirt off.
178
00:08:10,170 --> 00:08:11,220
Leonard, this is nice.
179
00:08:11,222 --> 00:08:12,504
I'm so glad we did this.
180
00:08:12,506 --> 00:08:13,605
Me, too.
181
00:08:15,725 --> 00:08:16,792
So what do you think?
182
00:08:16,794 --> 00:08:18,060
Are we gonna get back together?
183
00:08:18,062 --> 00:08:20,679
Whoa. Not so fast.
184
00:08:20,681 --> 00:08:22,531
I'm sorry, what did I say?
185
00:08:22,533 --> 00:08:26,268
Leonard, you know I will always
have feelings for you.
186
00:08:26,270 --> 00:08:27,820
Oh, God.
What?
187
00:08:27,822 --> 00:08:29,238
You said "always."
188
00:08:29,240 --> 00:08:30,806
You'll always have
feelings for me.
189
00:08:30,808 --> 00:08:31,740
So?
190
00:08:31,742 --> 00:08:33,275
So, that sounds more like
191
00:08:33,277 --> 00:08:35,194
something you'd say
if you didn't want
192
00:08:35,196 --> 00:08:36,328
a relationship with someone.
193
00:08:36,330 --> 00:08:37,746
"This isn't working out,
194
00:08:37,748 --> 00:08:39,531
but I'll always have
feelings for you."
195
00:08:39,533 --> 00:08:41,416
"I'm sorry I slept
with your best friend,
196
00:08:41,418 --> 00:08:43,318
but I'll always have
feelings for you."
197
00:08:43,320 --> 00:08:44,787
"Here's the thing, Lisa,
198
00:08:44,789 --> 00:08:48,540
I'm into dudes now, but I'll
always have feelings for you."
199
00:08:48,542 --> 00:08:50,926
How would you say it?
200
00:08:50,928 --> 00:08:52,828
I have feelings for you.
201
00:08:52,830 --> 00:08:54,129
It's the same thing.
No, it's not.
202
00:08:54,131 --> 00:08:55,497
"Always" made it worse.
203
00:08:55,499 --> 00:08:56,498
You're overthinking this.
204
00:08:56,500 --> 00:08:57,716
No, I'm not.
Yes, you are.
205
00:08:57,718 --> 00:08:59,134
You always overthink things.
206
00:08:59,136 --> 00:09:00,853
Th-There you go.
"Always" made it worse.
207
00:09:02,622 --> 00:09:06,008
See, this is where everything
goes wrong: when we talk.
208
00:09:06,010 --> 00:09:10,779
Well, I don't know how you have
a relationship without talking.
209
00:09:10,781 --> 00:09:12,281
Hey, I went out with this guy TJ
210
00:09:12,283 --> 00:09:13,649
for eight months,
we never talked.
211
00:09:13,651 --> 00:09:15,868
To this day, I don't even know
what TJ stands for.
212
00:09:15,870 --> 00:09:18,520
Wait, if you guys
didn't talk, what--
213
00:09:18,522 --> 00:09:20,289
Never mind, stupid question.
214
00:09:23,543 --> 00:09:27,529
And now that I have
some wood,
215
00:09:27,531 --> 00:09:31,800
I'm going to begin
the erection of my settlement.
216
00:09:32,919 --> 00:09:35,420
He's got to be
doing this on purpose.
217
00:09:38,892 --> 00:09:40,375
Ooh, 8:30.
218
00:09:40,377 --> 00:09:43,879
You and Penny decide to go out
and paint the town beige?
219
00:09:43,881 --> 00:09:47,048
You're 30 years old
and you live with your mother.
220
00:09:49,886 --> 00:09:51,887
I guess it didn't go well.
221
00:09:51,889 --> 00:09:53,422
We don't know that.
222
00:09:53,424 --> 00:09:54,573
Not to a certainty.
223
00:09:54,575 --> 00:09:57,326
All we know
is that Leonard is home.
224
00:10:00,247 --> 00:10:02,731
How about now?
225
00:10:02,733 --> 00:10:05,667
Again, not enough
evidence.
226
00:10:05,669 --> 00:10:08,704
For all we know,
he's being murdered.
227
00:10:10,707 --> 00:10:12,374
Now, back to our game.
228
00:10:12,376 --> 00:10:15,727
You were in the middle
of an erection.
229
00:10:18,865 --> 00:10:22,100
Oh, of course.
It's right here in my hand.
230
00:10:36,066 --> 00:10:38,617
What does she want from me now?
231
00:10:41,704 --> 00:10:44,273
What's up?
232
00:10:44,275 --> 00:10:46,775
Do not overthink this.
233
00:10:54,050 --> 00:10:57,135
I don't understand.
Bup-bup-bup-bup-bup-bup-bup.
234
00:10:57,137 --> 00:10:59,504
Okay, but earlier
it seemed like...
235
00:10:59,506 --> 00:11:01,723
No talking.
236
00:11:03,176 --> 00:11:05,961
Even during? 'Cause
sometimes I have questions.
237
00:11:14,753 --> 00:11:18,105
Well, that was fun.
238
00:11:18,107 --> 00:11:20,891
Yeah, except for when I got
the foot cramp.
239
00:11:20,893 --> 00:11:22,592
You hung in there, though.
240
00:11:22,594 --> 00:11:25,395
There was a lot at stake.
241
00:11:25,397 --> 00:11:28,131
So what do you
want to do now?
242
00:11:28,133 --> 00:11:30,717
Well, I want to go get
my asthma inhaler,
243
00:11:30,719 --> 00:11:32,919
but it might ruin the moment.
244
00:11:34,740 --> 00:11:37,741
Just, just
help me out here.
245
00:11:37,743 --> 00:11:40,410
How does a miserable date
end in sex?
246
00:11:40,412 --> 00:11:42,996
I don't know,
it's complicated.
247
00:11:42,998 --> 00:11:44,748
Well, I'm
a pretty smart guy,
248
00:11:44,750 --> 00:11:47,134
and right now my brain has
dibs on the blood supply,
249
00:11:47,136 --> 00:11:49,136
so give it a go.
250
00:11:49,138 --> 00:11:51,755
Okay, it's just,
251
00:11:51,757 --> 00:11:53,673
at the restaurant
when you said
252
00:11:53,675 --> 00:11:55,092
you wanted us to
be together again,
253
00:11:55,094 --> 00:11:59,913
it got very real very
fast and I panicked.
254
00:11:59,915 --> 00:12:01,148
Why?
255
00:12:01,150 --> 00:12:03,216
What are you
afraid of?
256
00:12:03,218 --> 00:12:04,935
Well, what if
we do go out
257
00:12:04,937 --> 00:12:07,521
and I do something stupid
and dump you again?
258
00:12:07,523 --> 00:12:08,822
What if I dump you?
259
00:12:13,244 --> 00:12:15,779
Come on, be serious.
260
00:12:15,781 --> 00:12:18,281
Well, how about
if we don't think
261
00:12:18,283 --> 00:12:20,250
about this
as a relationship?
262
00:12:20,252 --> 00:12:22,786
It could be more like
a new version of software.
263
00:12:22,788 --> 00:12:24,788
Penny and Leonard 2.0.
264
00:12:24,790 --> 00:12:27,307
We can test it internally,
shake out the bugs,
265
00:12:27,309 --> 00:12:29,109
and if we both feel
it's solid,
266
00:12:29,111 --> 00:12:31,795
then we'll roll it out
to the public.
267
00:12:31,797 --> 00:12:34,748
So we don't tell people
we're back together?
268
00:12:34,750 --> 00:12:35,715
Exactly.
269
00:12:35,717 --> 00:12:37,801
We pretend like our date
went badly.
270
00:12:37,803 --> 00:12:39,953
Well, we don't really
have to pretend.
271
00:12:39,955 --> 00:12:42,222
And we let them think
that we decided
272
00:12:42,224 --> 00:12:43,390
to just be friends
273
00:12:43,392 --> 00:12:45,308
and that everything's cool.
274
00:12:45,310 --> 00:12:46,843
Okay, great.
275
00:12:47,846 --> 00:12:50,013
Hey, I just remembered.
276
00:12:50,015 --> 00:12:52,298
I still got one
of your inhalers.
277
00:12:54,402 --> 00:12:56,603
I can't believe
you kept this.
278
00:12:56,605 --> 00:12:59,272
Yeah, I was gonna throw it
away, but I just couldn't.
279
00:12:59,274 --> 00:13:01,858
That is so sweet.
280
00:13:05,797 --> 00:13:08,131
In 25 to 30 minutes
I'm gonna show you
281
00:13:08,133 --> 00:13:10,734
how much
this means to me.
282
00:13:22,180 --> 00:13:22,829
Leonard?
283
00:13:22,831 --> 00:13:25,015
Yeah, hi, hi.
284
00:13:25,967 --> 00:13:27,934
How's it going?
285
00:13:27,936 --> 00:13:29,636
Uh, can't complain.
286
00:13:29,638 --> 00:13:31,605
Thanks for asking.
287
00:13:32,690 --> 00:13:35,809
Well, what were you doing out
at 3:00 in the morning?
288
00:13:35,811 --> 00:13:39,679
Well, uh, uh...
what are you doing up?
289
00:13:39,681 --> 00:13:42,282
I was using the bathroom.
290
00:13:42,284 --> 00:13:46,153
Yeah, well, so was I.
291
00:13:46,155 --> 00:13:48,288
Really?
292
00:13:48,290 --> 00:13:50,991
I didn't see you in there.
293
00:13:52,743 --> 00:13:56,913
Obviously... when I saw
that you were in ours,
294
00:13:56,915 --> 00:14:00,300
I went and used another one.
295
00:14:01,135 --> 00:14:04,004
Where?
296
00:14:04,006 --> 00:14:06,923
The, the gas station
across the street.
297
00:14:07,808 --> 00:14:09,876
In your pajamas?
298
00:14:09,878 --> 00:14:12,429
Yes.
299
00:14:12,431 --> 00:14:14,648
Without shoes?
300
00:14:15,900 --> 00:14:18,101
Yes.
301
00:14:18,886 --> 00:14:21,771
On a cold
winter's night?
302
00:14:23,608 --> 00:14:25,825
Yes.
303
00:14:28,613 --> 00:14:30,830
Seems unlikely.
304
00:14:30,832 --> 00:14:33,116
Did you bring
your asthma inhaler?
305
00:14:33,118 --> 00:14:36,503
Uh, uh, uh, yes, I did.
306
00:14:39,740 --> 00:14:41,958
Well, then,
I guess it's plausible.
307
00:14:43,044 --> 00:14:45,128
D-- hang on a
second, mister.
308
00:14:45,130 --> 00:14:46,346
What?
309
00:14:46,348 --> 00:14:51,067
After you used the facilities
at the gas station,
310
00:14:51,069 --> 00:14:52,435
did you make a purchase?
311
00:14:52,437 --> 00:14:54,137
What?
312
00:14:54,139 --> 00:14:56,723
It's customary, when
using the restroom
313
00:14:56,725 --> 00:15:00,193
at a retail establishment,
to make a small purchase.
314
00:15:00,195 --> 00:15:01,278
Did you?
315
00:15:01,280 --> 00:15:02,729
No.
316
00:15:04,099 --> 00:15:06,283
Here's two dollars.
317
00:15:09,070 --> 00:15:11,955
Go buy some beef jerky.
318
00:15:18,212 --> 00:15:21,448
I don't want beef jerky.
319
00:15:23,651 --> 00:15:25,585
It's not about you.
320
00:15:25,587 --> 00:15:28,138
It's about a poor immigrant
from Pakistan
321
00:15:28,140 --> 00:15:29,956
trying to make his way
in America
322
00:15:29,958 --> 00:15:31,391
by working the graveyard shift
323
00:15:31,393 --> 00:15:34,060
at the Colorado Boulevard
Chevron.
324
00:15:35,963 --> 00:15:38,148
Fine.
325
00:15:40,268 --> 00:15:43,236
Needy Baby, Greedy Baby indeed.
326
00:15:45,306 --> 00:15:46,906
Leonard will be here
in a moment.
327
00:15:46,908 --> 00:15:49,442
He's looking
for a different parking space.
328
00:15:49,444 --> 00:15:50,410
Why?
329
00:15:50,412 --> 00:15:51,778
We were next to a car
330
00:15:51,780 --> 00:15:54,364
with an "Ask me about my
grandchildren" bumper sticker,
331
00:15:54,366 --> 00:15:57,083
and I was afraid if we ran
into them on the way out,
332
00:15:57,085 --> 00:15:59,703
I'd be obligated
to do so.
333
00:16:00,988 --> 00:16:04,490
I'm so disappointed it didn't
work with him and Penny.
334
00:16:04,492 --> 00:16:06,159
Me, too.
335
00:16:06,161 --> 00:16:07,327
Out of deference
to them,
336
00:16:07,329 --> 00:16:10,797
let's not flaunt our
happy relationship.
337
00:16:10,799 --> 00:16:13,133
You have a keen insight
into the human heart,
338
00:16:13,135 --> 00:16:15,585
Amy Farrah Fowler.
339
00:16:16,804 --> 00:16:20,890
We are next to a Suburu with
a Gore/Lieberman bumper sticker.
340
00:16:20,892 --> 00:16:23,610
Well, I doubt they'd want to
talk about that, so we're fine.
341
00:16:25,112 --> 00:16:26,846
I'm surprised to see you here
342
00:16:26,848 --> 00:16:29,149
after it went
so badly with Penny.
343
00:16:29,151 --> 00:16:30,784
Well, hey, we're grown-ups.
344
00:16:30,786 --> 00:16:32,235
We can still be friends.
345
00:16:32,237 --> 00:16:34,537
Boy, I don't know if I
could be friends with Howie
346
00:16:34,539 --> 00:16:35,939
if we broke up.
347
00:16:35,941 --> 00:16:36,790
Why not?
348
00:16:36,792 --> 00:16:39,609
I'm a very vengeful person.
349
00:16:39,611 --> 00:16:42,078
Really?
350
00:16:42,080 --> 00:16:45,165
With access
to weaponized smallpox.
351
00:16:47,218 --> 00:16:49,169
Here you go, guys, let me get
you going with some water.
352
00:16:49,171 --> 00:16:50,754
You need menus
or you know what you want?
353
00:16:50,756 --> 00:16:52,205
Leonard knows what he wants,
but it looks
354
00:16:52,207 --> 00:16:54,157
like he's not gonna
get it from you.
355
00:16:55,209 --> 00:16:56,709
Howard.
No,
356
00:16:56,711 --> 00:16:58,094
that's okay, Bernadette.
357
00:16:58,096 --> 00:17:00,347
Sometimes these things
just don't work out.
358
00:17:00,349 --> 00:17:01,815
Yeah, it's all good.
359
00:17:01,817 --> 00:17:04,768
We-We'll always have
feelings for each other.
360
00:17:06,387 --> 00:17:09,222
Oh, that's nice.
361
00:17:09,224 --> 00:17:12,392
See, she knew
what "always" meant.
362
00:17:12,394 --> 00:17:15,195
Wow, you're like a dog
with a bone, aren't you?
363
00:17:15,197 --> 00:17:17,414
I'm just making a point.
364
00:17:17,416 --> 00:17:19,899
Is the point that you don't know
when to let something go?
365
00:17:19,901 --> 00:17:20,750
People, people,
366
00:17:20,752 --> 00:17:22,252
please,
before you say
367
00:17:22,254 --> 00:17:23,837
something you
both regret,
368
00:17:23,839 --> 00:17:25,672
I'd like to place my order.
369
00:17:26,924 --> 00:17:28,458
Yeah, just hang on, Sheldon.
370
00:17:28,460 --> 00:17:29,959
You know why we can't be
together?
371
00:17:29,961 --> 00:17:31,411
Because you always have
to be right.
372
00:17:31,413 --> 00:17:32,912
Oh, that is not true.
373
00:17:32,914 --> 00:17:34,180
I got to go
with Leonard on this.
374
00:17:34,182 --> 00:17:36,683
He is wrong
more than anyone I know.
375
00:17:37,651 --> 00:17:39,352
You know what?
I just realized I'm on a break.
376
00:17:39,354 --> 00:17:40,603
I'll get someone else.
377
00:17:40,605 --> 00:17:42,422
Well...
378
00:17:42,424 --> 00:17:45,141
Leonard, promise me that when
our new waitress comes over,
379
00:17:45,143 --> 00:17:48,144
you will not start a complicated
on-again, off-again relationship
380
00:17:48,146 --> 00:17:50,897
with her,
because I am very, very hungry.
381
00:18:02,460 --> 00:18:04,661
Unbelievable.
382
00:18:08,666 --> 00:18:10,300
Mind explaining to me
why you were being
383
00:18:10,302 --> 00:18:11,835
such a jerk at the restaurant?
Well,
384
00:18:11,837 --> 00:18:13,720
I was trying to act like
we weren't seeing each other.
385
00:18:13,722 --> 00:18:15,121
That was the plan, right?
No,
386
00:18:15,123 --> 00:18:17,457
the plan was to tell people
we decided to stay friends.
387
00:18:17,459 --> 00:18:18,624
That's a little hard to do
388
00:18:18,626 --> 00:18:22,178
when you're always being
such a tool bag.
389
00:18:22,180 --> 00:18:24,981
You know what? I don't have to
stand here and take this crap.
390
00:18:24,983 --> 00:18:26,850
The hell do you think
you're going?
391
00:18:26,852 --> 00:18:30,019
Isn't sex after fighting
kind of what we do now?!
392
00:18:30,021 --> 00:18:32,522
Yeah, kind of, yeah.
393
00:18:40,614 --> 00:18:42,582
What are we doing?
394
00:18:42,584 --> 00:18:43,783
What do you mean?
395
00:18:43,785 --> 00:18:47,504
Every scenario I play out
for you and me ends badly.
396
00:18:47,506 --> 00:18:49,889
That's because you
overthink everything.
397
00:18:49,891 --> 00:18:52,158
Leonard, are you listening
to me?
398
00:18:52,160 --> 00:18:53,593
What?
Yeah.
399
00:18:53,595 --> 00:18:55,595
This is a disaster.
400
00:18:55,597 --> 00:18:56,846
I distinctly ordered
401
00:18:56,848 --> 00:18:59,299
the Leonard Nimoy Mr.
Spock cardboard standee.
402
00:18:59,301 --> 00:19:00,850
Why would
I feel safer
403
00:19:00,852 --> 00:19:03,720
with Zachary Quinto
at the foot of my bed?
404
00:19:04,855 --> 00:19:09,108
I don't know, he was
pretty badass on Heroes.
405
00:19:09,110 --> 00:19:12,345
You're right, I'll
give him a shot.
406
00:19:14,315 --> 00:19:16,199
Hang on.
407
00:19:16,201 --> 00:19:17,867
Penny, do you have
plans for dinner?
408
00:19:17,869 --> 00:19:19,486
Why, you guys going somewhere?
409
00:19:19,488 --> 00:19:20,403
No, I mean just you and me.
410
00:19:20,405 --> 00:19:24,207
Ooh...!
Ooh...!
411
00:19:24,209 --> 00:19:26,709
Uh, have you thought
this through?
412
00:19:26,711 --> 00:19:30,246
Yes, and I think
we should go anyway.
413
00:19:32,967 --> 00:19:33,883
No, can't do it.
414
00:19:33,885 --> 00:19:35,752
Sorry, Quinto,
you're going back.
415
00:19:45,047 --> 00:19:46,830
If you and Leonard
get back together,
416
00:19:46,832 --> 00:19:48,332
Sheldon and I
will finally have someone
417
00:19:48,334 --> 00:19:50,017
to go on double dates with.
418
00:19:50,019 --> 00:19:51,335
What about me and Howard?
419
00:19:51,337 --> 00:19:53,771
Fine, we can double
with you, too.
420
00:19:54,656 --> 00:19:56,974
So insecure.
421
00:19:58,113 --> 00:20:00,864
Where are you guys going to eat?
422
00:20:00,866 --> 00:20:03,683
Penny?
423
00:20:05,036 --> 00:20:10,206
Do you, Penny, take Leonard to
be your lawful wedded husband?
424
00:20:17,548 --> 00:20:19,265
Well, it's
a little late for me
425
00:20:19,267 --> 00:20:21,551
to start saying no,
isn't it?
426
00:20:23,054 --> 00:20:25,055
Penny.
427
00:20:25,057 --> 00:20:26,172
Sorry,
just remembered
428
00:20:26,174 --> 00:20:28,024
I've got to stop
at the drugstore.
429
00:20:28,085 --> 00:20:32,085
== sync, corrected by elderman ==