1
00:00:02,857 --> 00:00:04,312
Burbank Airport, please.
2
00:00:04,313 --> 00:00:05,729
Vegas, here we come!
3
00:00:05,731 --> 00:00:06,730
No husbands,
4
00:00:06,732 --> 00:00:08,616
no boyfriends, no rules.
5
00:00:08,618 --> 00:00:10,017
No rules?
6
00:00:10,019 --> 00:00:12,152
We're not gonna get drunk
and have a six-way
7
00:00:12,154 --> 00:00:14,405
with the Blue Man Group, are we?
8
00:00:14,407 --> 00:00:16,106
No.
9
00:00:16,108 --> 00:00:17,524
So there are some rules.
10
00:00:17,526 --> 00:00:18,609
Fine.
11
00:00:18,611 --> 00:00:21,912
No husbands, no boyfriends,
some rules.
12
00:00:21,914 --> 00:00:22,696
Thank you.
13
00:00:22,698 --> 00:00:25,699
Vegas!
14
00:00:25,701 --> 00:00:28,786
The ladies are away,
the boys will play.
15
00:00:28,788 --> 00:00:30,070
Anything can happen.
16
00:00:30,072 --> 00:00:31,739
It's gonna get crazy.
17
00:00:31,741 --> 00:00:33,440
Dungeons & Dragons!
18
00:00:35,093 --> 00:00:36,343
I got a brand-new bikini,
19
00:00:36,345 --> 00:00:40,080
so drinks at the pool
are on these.
20
00:00:40,082 --> 00:00:43,434
I got a sexy new tube top
that says "Come hither"
21
00:00:43,436 --> 00:00:47,254
and a can of pepper spray
that says "Close enough, Jack."
22
00:00:47,256 --> 00:00:49,940
I got some old underwear
I'm gonna throw on stage
23
00:00:49,942 --> 00:00:52,393
at the Garth Brooks concert.
24
00:00:52,395 --> 00:00:54,695
I'm sorry, why old?
25
00:00:54,697 --> 00:00:56,763
'Cause last time I saw him,
I threw new ones
26
00:00:56,765 --> 00:00:58,115
and it got me nothing.
27
00:00:59,484 --> 00:01:01,619
I've got a brand-new
seven piece set
28
00:01:01,621 --> 00:01:03,237
of polyhedral dice.
29
00:01:03,239 --> 00:01:06,073
Hello, new dice smell.
30
00:01:07,275 --> 00:01:08,608
I've got my helm
of lordly might,
31
00:01:08,610 --> 00:01:10,961
my boots of speed,
and if things get too exciting,
32
00:01:10,963 --> 00:01:13,613
my inhaler of asthma.
33
00:01:13,615 --> 00:01:16,634
I got my new bloodthirsty
savage warrior
34
00:01:16,636 --> 00:01:19,453
who will lay waste to all
who stand before him.
35
00:01:19,455 --> 00:01:21,171
And I had a sensible salad
for lunch,
36
00:01:21,173 --> 00:01:23,290
so I can eat
all the pizza I want.
37
00:01:23,292 --> 00:01:25,059
Come on, are we
gonna sit around
38
00:01:25,061 --> 00:01:26,793
chatting like a bunch
of teenage girls,
39
00:01:26,795 --> 00:01:29,480
or are we gonna play D & D
like a bunch of teenage boys
40
00:01:29,482 --> 00:01:32,132
who are never gonna have sex
with those teenage girls?!
41
00:01:33,801 --> 00:01:36,153
Vegas! Vegas! Vegas!
42
00:01:36,155 --> 00:01:38,022
The Dungeon
of Mofooskay-Heeko!
43
00:01:38,024 --> 00:01:39,306
The Dungeon of
Mofooskay-Heeko!
44
00:01:39,308 --> 00:01:41,742
The Dungeon
of Mofooskay-Heeko!
45
00:01:45,030 --> 00:01:48,666
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
46
00:01:48,668 --> 00:01:52,002
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
47
00:01:52,004 --> 00:01:53,671
♪ The Earth began to cool
48
00:01:53,673 --> 00:01:56,223
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
49
00:01:56,225 --> 00:01:58,859
♪ We built the Wall
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
50
00:01:58,861 --> 00:02:01,562
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
51
00:02:01,564 --> 00:02:03,464
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
52
00:02:03,466 --> 00:02:05,264
♪ Bang! ♪
53
00:02:05,265 --> 00:02:09,265
♪ The Big Bang Theory 6x23 ♪
The Love Spell Potential
Original Air Date on May 9, 2013
54
00:02:09,266 --> 00:02:14,266
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
55
00:02:14,269 --> 00:02:16,454
I'm actually glad
Lucy had to work tonight.
56
00:02:16,456 --> 00:02:19,090
Saved me the awkward
conversation about how I was
57
00:02:19,092 --> 00:02:21,876
gonna be hanging with my bros.
58
00:02:21,878 --> 00:02:24,512
Isn't every conversation
you two have awkward?
59
00:02:24,514 --> 00:02:25,930
Eh?
60
00:02:25,932 --> 00:02:27,214
Painfully so.
61
00:02:27,216 --> 00:02:29,683
We have this rule on the phone
that if no one talks
62
00:02:29,685 --> 00:02:32,219
for three minutes,
you can just hang up.
63
00:02:33,755 --> 00:02:35,973
So into her.
64
00:02:35,975 --> 00:02:38,142
Ready whenever
you guys are.
65
00:02:38,144 --> 00:02:40,094
Yeah, yeah, we'll
be right there.
66
00:02:40,096 --> 00:02:41,328
Yeah, Leonard...
Yeah?
67
00:02:41,330 --> 00:02:42,646
I'm not sure how I feel
68
00:02:42,648 --> 00:02:45,900
about Howard being
dungeon master instead of you.
69
00:02:45,902 --> 00:02:46,934
Oh, that's nice.
70
00:02:46,936 --> 00:02:49,120
But relax,
sometimes change is good.
71
00:02:49,122 --> 00:02:51,322
Uh, you were worried
about Zachary Quinto
72
00:02:51,324 --> 00:02:53,741
being the new Spock,
but you wound up liking him.
73
00:02:53,743 --> 00:02:54,775
Oh, please.
74
00:02:54,777 --> 00:02:56,410
Every time the topic
of change comes up,
75
00:02:56,412 --> 00:02:58,162
you throw Zachary
Quinto in my face.
76
00:02:59,131 --> 00:03:00,948
I'm upset the mailman
has a new haircut:
77
00:03:00,950 --> 00:03:02,333
Zachary Quinto.
78
00:03:02,335 --> 00:03:04,251
I'm upset that daylight
saving time started:
79
00:03:04,253 --> 00:03:05,669
Zachary Quinto.
80
00:03:05,671 --> 00:03:07,955
I'm upset daylight saving time
ended: Zachary Quinto.
81
00:03:07,957 --> 00:03:09,140
I'm saying this
82
00:03:09,142 --> 00:03:10,925
for the last time:
Zachary Quinto was
83
00:03:10,927 --> 00:03:12,810
a weird, wonderful,
unrepeatable event.
84
00:03:12,812 --> 00:03:14,762
So stop using
him against me.
85
00:03:15,597 --> 00:03:17,848
Okay, here we go.
86
00:03:17,850 --> 00:03:20,017
You find yourselves in
87
00:03:20,019 --> 00:03:22,520
an overgrown old forest.
88
00:03:22,522 --> 00:03:25,856
Before you is a giant oak tree
89
00:03:25,858 --> 00:03:30,027
with a face on it that looks
a lot like Nicolas Cage.
90
00:03:30,029 --> 00:03:32,580
He says,
91
00:03:32,582 --> 00:03:35,749
"Travel with caution.
92
00:03:37,002 --> 00:03:40,754
"These woods are home
to the bones
93
00:03:40,756 --> 00:03:42,656
"of many a fallen...
94
00:03:42,658 --> 00:03:44,875
hero!"
95
00:03:47,596 --> 00:03:51,515
See, Howard's just as good
a dungeon master as I am.
96
00:03:51,517 --> 00:03:52,766
As good?
97
00:03:52,768 --> 00:03:55,386
You just got pantsed
in the schoolyard, four-eyes.
98
00:03:55,388 --> 00:03:57,438
Hey, come on, guys, focus.
99
00:03:57,440 --> 00:03:59,373
Um, uh...
100
00:03:59,375 --> 00:04:02,143
Oh, mighty Nicolas Cage tree,
101
00:04:02,145 --> 00:04:03,527
we thank you
for your warning,
102
00:04:03,529 --> 00:04:05,479
but we are brave warriors,
103
00:04:05,481 --> 00:04:08,816
and nothing short of death
will keep us from our goal.
104
00:04:12,704 --> 00:04:14,405
Oh, Lucy's free after all.
105
00:04:14,407 --> 00:04:16,157
See ya.
106
00:04:17,025 --> 00:04:18,659
Hey, hey, hey,
you can't leave.
107
00:04:18,661 --> 00:04:19,844
We just started.
108
00:04:19,846 --> 00:04:21,378
You're right,
I should finish the game.
109
00:04:21,380 --> 00:04:24,465
I take my plus-one long sword,
stab myself in the face with it.
110
00:04:24,467 --> 00:04:26,500
I'm dead, I've got
a date with a girl.
111
00:04:26,502 --> 00:04:28,135
Bye.
112
00:04:29,888 --> 00:04:30,921
We'll be fine, watch.
113
00:04:30,923 --> 00:04:33,757
Suddenly, a spectral shape
114
00:04:33,759 --> 00:04:37,511
rises from Koothrappali's
bloody corpse, and says,
115
00:04:37,513 --> 00:04:39,063
"Don't worry, buddies,
116
00:04:39,065 --> 00:04:41,065
"Ghost Raj will help
117
00:04:41,067 --> 00:04:42,933
guide you through the forest."
118
00:04:42,935 --> 00:04:45,385
"Well, I'm just
119
00:04:45,387 --> 00:04:47,821
"a tree, but if I were you,
I'd listen to your
120
00:04:47,823 --> 00:04:49,690
ghost friend!"
121
00:04:53,078 --> 00:04:56,030
Go on, give him
your lunch money.
122
00:05:00,168 --> 00:05:03,120
I'm very happy you were able
to hang out tonight.
123
00:05:03,122 --> 00:05:04,371
Me, too.
124
00:05:04,373 --> 00:05:06,457
Not that it's up to you
to make me happy.
125
00:05:06,459 --> 00:05:08,008
Uh, well, unless
you find neediness sexy.
126
00:05:08,010 --> 00:05:09,710
In which case,
you're about to have dinner
127
00:05:09,712 --> 00:05:12,096
with the hottest man
on the planet.
128
00:05:13,798 --> 00:05:15,466
Can I tell you something?
129
00:05:15,468 --> 00:05:17,218
I was so nervous
about seeing you,
130
00:05:17,220 --> 00:05:19,637
before I left my apartment,
I put roll-on antiperspirant
131
00:05:19,639 --> 00:05:21,889
all over my body.
132
00:05:21,891 --> 00:05:23,423
Really?
Yeah.
133
00:05:23,425 --> 00:05:25,609
If sweat starts squirting
out the top of my head,
134
00:05:25,611 --> 00:05:27,645
you'll know why.
135
00:05:27,647 --> 00:05:29,530
I, uh, I'm sorry
to put you through that.
136
00:05:29,532 --> 00:05:31,448
Oh, it's okay.
137
00:05:31,450 --> 00:05:32,599
I've been trying
to force myself
138
00:05:32,601 --> 00:05:34,285
to do things that
make me scared.
139
00:05:34,287 --> 00:05:36,537
What else have you been
thinking about doing?
140
00:05:36,539 --> 00:05:38,072
Well, let's see.
141
00:05:38,074 --> 00:05:40,574
I'd love to be able to tell
the lady who cuts my hair
142
00:05:40,576 --> 00:05:42,459
that I don't like bangs.
143
00:05:42,461 --> 00:05:44,912
I like your bangs.
144
00:05:44,914 --> 00:05:46,714
Oh, thanks, I
like 'em, too.
145
00:05:55,640 --> 00:05:56,840
What else?
146
00:05:56,842 --> 00:05:58,175
Mm...
147
00:05:58,177 --> 00:06:00,060
it's kind of a tie
between sending food back
148
00:06:00,062 --> 00:06:01,979
in a restaurant and
saying no to those kids
149
00:06:01,981 --> 00:06:03,463
who sell magazines
door-to-door.
150
00:06:03,465 --> 00:06:04,682
Mm, yeah.
151
00:06:04,684 --> 00:06:06,600
Those are both toughies.
I know.
152
00:06:06,602 --> 00:06:08,936
I have a two-year
subscription to Guns & Ammo.
153
00:06:12,007 --> 00:06:14,641
I push my shoulder
against the secret door
154
00:06:14,643 --> 00:06:16,193
to see if it gives way.
155
00:06:16,195 --> 00:06:17,311
Uh...
156
00:06:17,313 --> 00:06:18,445
it does.
157
00:06:21,250 --> 00:06:23,917
He does sound
effects, too!
158
00:06:25,036 --> 00:06:27,371
Hey, I always did sound effects.
159
00:06:27,373 --> 00:06:30,674
A-A swarm of bloodthirsty bats
fly through the dungeon.
160
00:06:34,095 --> 00:06:36,764
Uh, uh, they attack
a nearby unicorn.
161
00:06:42,854 --> 00:06:45,706
Okay, well, I have a sound
effect for those sound effects.
162
00:06:48,810 --> 00:06:50,978
Guess who!
163
00:06:50,980 --> 00:06:52,279
What are you doing back?
164
00:06:52,281 --> 00:06:55,515
That's an excellent
question. Amy?
165
00:06:55,517 --> 00:06:57,985
Uh, well...
166
00:06:57,987 --> 00:06:59,787
when we were going
through security,
167
00:06:59,789 --> 00:07:02,206
I got pulled
out of line for a pat-down.
168
00:07:02,208 --> 00:07:03,424
The, uh,
169
00:07:03,426 --> 00:07:05,793
TSA agent got
a little handsy...
170
00:07:06,611 --> 00:07:08,128
I may have broken
171
00:07:08,130 --> 00:07:09,863
her nose with my elbow.
172
00:07:11,199 --> 00:07:13,050
Long story short,
she's on the No Fly List
173
00:07:13,052 --> 00:07:16,053
and we might have been
followed here by a drone.
174
00:07:16,055 --> 00:07:17,888
I'm sorry.
175
00:07:17,890 --> 00:07:19,840
I feel like such an idiot.
176
00:07:19,842 --> 00:07:20,874
Oh, it's not so bad.
177
00:07:20,876 --> 00:07:22,309
You lost money, you're
filled with shame
178
00:07:22,311 --> 00:07:23,844
and you got groped
by a stranger.
179
00:07:23,846 --> 00:07:26,313
I mean, that's Vegas,
you nailed it.
180
00:07:26,315 --> 00:07:28,565
You guys enjoy your evening.
181
00:07:28,567 --> 00:07:30,901
I'm gonna go before I ruin
anybody else's weekend.
182
00:07:30,903 --> 00:07:33,387
That's my girl.
183
00:07:33,389 --> 00:07:35,272
No, no.
184
00:07:35,274 --> 00:07:37,274
Amy, wait. Uh, uh,
I know it's not
185
00:07:37,276 --> 00:07:38,442
the night you had in mind,
186
00:07:38,444 --> 00:07:40,194
but why don't you guys stay
and play with us?
187
00:07:40,196 --> 00:07:41,161
It'll be fun.
188
00:07:41,163 --> 00:07:42,363
It would-- fun?
189
00:07:42,365 --> 00:07:43,614
Yeah, okay,
three weeks ago,
190
00:07:43,616 --> 00:07:44,782
you bought crunchy
peanut butter,
191
00:07:44,784 --> 00:07:47,034
but now you want the
girls to play D & D--
192
00:07:47,036 --> 00:07:48,969
do you have a
drug problem?
193
00:07:48,971 --> 00:07:50,587
What's the big deal?
194
00:07:50,589 --> 00:07:53,173
Raj bailed, so we could
use some extra players.
195
00:07:53,175 --> 00:07:54,908
Well, I've just never
played Dungeons & Dragons
196
00:07:54,910 --> 00:07:56,910
with girls before.
197
00:07:56,912 --> 00:07:57,878
Oh, don't worry, sweetie.
198
00:07:57,880 --> 00:08:00,030
No one has.
199
00:08:01,783 --> 00:08:03,884
So, what do you say?
200
00:08:05,553 --> 00:08:07,888
I'll leave it up to
the dungeon master.
201
00:08:09,108 --> 00:08:12,276
Yeah, a... satanic fungus
202
00:08:12,278 --> 00:08:15,279
that looks suspiciously
like Al Pacino
203
00:08:15,281 --> 00:08:18,866
rises from the forest floor
and says,
204
00:08:18,868 --> 00:08:21,235
"You're playing D & D.
205
00:08:21,237 --> 00:08:23,320
"You're playing
D & D.
206
00:08:23,322 --> 00:08:26,240
"This whole apartment...
207
00:08:27,425 --> 00:08:30,127
...is playing D & D."
208
00:08:41,089 --> 00:08:42,956
Okay, who wants a drink?
209
00:08:42,958 --> 00:08:46,259
Yeah, we-- now, Penny,
we don't consume alcohol
210
00:08:46,261 --> 00:08:47,794
during Dungeons & Dragons.
211
00:08:47,796 --> 00:08:50,546
It impairs our judgment.
212
00:08:50,548 --> 00:08:52,432
Oh, this isn't alcohol.
213
00:08:52,434 --> 00:08:55,518
It's a magic potion
that makes me like you.
214
00:08:58,472 --> 00:09:01,357
Double potion, please.
215
00:09:01,359 --> 00:09:02,442
Okay, here we go.
216
00:09:02,444 --> 00:09:03,943
You find yourselves
217
00:09:03,945 --> 00:09:08,114
face-to-face
with two hulking ogres.
218
00:09:08,116 --> 00:09:10,149
"What are you doing
219
00:09:10,151 --> 00:09:11,901
"in our dungeon?
220
00:09:13,854 --> 00:09:16,923
You shall die!"
221
00:09:16,925 --> 00:09:19,125
Okay, literal
goose bumps.
222
00:09:19,127 --> 00:09:21,294
Look.
223
00:09:21,296 --> 00:09:22,745
What do you do?
224
00:09:22,747 --> 00:09:24,196
I draw my broadsword.
225
00:09:24,198 --> 00:09:25,364
I ready my
quarter-staff.
226
00:09:25,366 --> 00:09:28,200
I drink my potion.
227
00:09:29,837 --> 00:09:31,871
- I say we attack the big one.
- You know what?
228
00:09:31,873 --> 00:09:33,089
Give me the dice,
I want to roll.
229
00:09:33,091 --> 00:09:34,140
Well, the dungeon master's
230
00:09:34,142 --> 00:09:35,207
supposed to roll.
231
00:09:35,209 --> 00:09:36,559
Yeah, well I'm supposed
to be in Vegas
232
00:09:36,561 --> 00:09:38,544
throwing up on a shrimp buffet.
Now give it.
233
00:09:40,764 --> 00:09:42,398
All right,
what do I need?
234
00:09:42,400 --> 00:09:44,984
Uh, 15 or higher.
235
00:09:44,986 --> 00:09:46,819
15's the point, the point is 15.
236
00:09:46,821 --> 00:09:50,573
Give the little lady some room,
here it is, coming out.
237
00:09:50,575 --> 00:09:51,557
Sixteen!
238
00:09:51,559 --> 00:09:54,077
Yes!
239
00:09:54,079 --> 00:09:56,729
Oh, please tell me
we're playing for money.
240
00:09:56,731 --> 00:09:58,247
Oh, even better than money.
241
00:09:58,249 --> 00:10:01,000
You gained experience points.
242
00:10:01,002 --> 00:10:03,336
More potion, please.
243
00:10:03,338 --> 00:10:04,754
Yeah.
244
00:10:05,923 --> 00:10:08,124
How are
your crab cakes?
245
00:10:08,126 --> 00:10:09,542
Kind of funky.
246
00:10:09,544 --> 00:10:10,343
That's great.
247
00:10:10,345 --> 00:10:11,544
It is?
248
00:10:11,546 --> 00:10:14,931
Does "funky" mean
something different in India?
249
00:10:14,933 --> 00:10:17,433
No, no. Uh, you've always
wanted to send your food back
250
00:10:17,435 --> 00:10:19,018
in a restaurant;
here's your chance.
251
00:10:19,043 --> 00:10:19,887
Mm.
252
00:10:19,888 --> 00:10:21,437
It's okay. I just won't eat 'em.
253
00:10:21,439 --> 00:10:23,523
Don't be ridiculous. Waiter?
254
00:10:24,358 --> 00:10:26,109
Everything all right?
255
00:10:26,111 --> 00:10:28,695
Uh... yeah.
256
00:10:28,697 --> 00:10:31,097
Everything all right with you?
257
00:10:31,099 --> 00:10:32,448
Yes.
258
00:10:33,266 --> 00:10:34,734
'Kay, thanks, bye.
259
00:10:34,736 --> 00:10:36,903
Hold on.
260
00:10:36,905 --> 00:10:39,038
Isn't there something else
you wanted to tell him?
261
00:10:39,940 --> 00:10:42,291
N-No, it-it's fine. Uh...
262
00:10:42,293 --> 00:10:45,945
He's from a different country;
he doesn't understand our ways.
263
00:10:47,798 --> 00:10:49,949
Don't be silly. Just tell him.
264
00:10:50,784 --> 00:10:52,802
I have to go to the bathroom.
265
00:10:52,804 --> 00:10:53,970
And it's not because
266
00:10:53,972 --> 00:10:55,338
the crab cakes are funky.
267
00:10:57,141 --> 00:10:58,424
So you're okay here?
268
00:10:58,426 --> 00:10:59,625
Uh, yeah, sorry.
269
00:10:59,627 --> 00:11:01,644
She's just a little shy.
270
00:11:01,646 --> 00:11:04,013
The-the first time we met,
she was so nervous,
271
00:11:04,015 --> 00:11:06,983
she climbed out a bathroom
window to get away from me.
272
00:11:21,799 --> 00:11:23,649
Uh-oh.
273
00:11:27,621 --> 00:11:29,622
Hey, Raj.
274
00:11:29,624 --> 00:11:32,491
Funny story.
275
00:11:33,594 --> 00:11:36,846
Come on, mama wants a
pair of dead ogres!
276
00:11:37,681 --> 00:11:39,682
17! The larger ogre is dead!
277
00:11:41,553 --> 00:11:43,102
The-the other ogre says,
278
00:11:43,104 --> 00:11:46,355
"You killed my brother.
279
00:11:46,357 --> 00:11:49,842
Now Ogre Thanksgiving
is ruined."
280
00:11:50,694 --> 00:11:52,645
That is amazing.
281
00:11:52,647 --> 00:11:55,198
He made me care
about the ogre!
282
00:11:56,116 --> 00:11:57,894
All right, Amy,
there's one ogre left.
283
00:11:57,895 --> 00:11:59,478
Take him out!
Okay.
284
00:11:59,480 --> 00:12:01,730
Pretend he's that
TSA agent. Come on.
285
00:12:03,733 --> 00:12:04,633
Nineteen!
286
00:12:06,470 --> 00:12:08,103
Yes!
287
00:12:08,105 --> 00:12:10,489
This is turning out to be
even better than Vegas!
288
00:12:10,491 --> 00:12:13,108
No, it's not!
289
00:12:16,246 --> 00:12:17,363
Lucy?
290
00:12:17,365 --> 00:12:18,747
Oh, hey.
291
00:12:18,749 --> 00:12:20,699
Long time no see.
292
00:12:23,670 --> 00:12:24,820
You don't know me very well,
293
00:12:24,822 --> 00:12:26,755
but each time you crawl out
a bathroom window
294
00:12:26,757 --> 00:12:30,292
to escape my company,
it chips away at my masculinity.
295
00:12:30,294 --> 00:12:32,044
I'm sorry.
296
00:12:32,046 --> 00:12:33,679
Why would you leave like that?
297
00:12:33,681 --> 00:12:35,330
You were pushing me;
I clearly didn't want
298
00:12:35,332 --> 00:12:38,267
to send my food back, and you
tried to make me do it anyway.
299
00:12:38,269 --> 00:12:41,854
Okay, if I upset you, then why
didn't you just say something?
300
00:12:41,856 --> 00:12:44,440
Well, how can I tell you I'm
upset if I can't tell the woman
301
00:12:44,442 --> 00:12:47,276
at Supercuts that my forehead's
my best feature?
302
00:12:48,778 --> 00:12:49,895
It's scary.
303
00:12:49,897 --> 00:12:51,697
Yeah, well, I like you a lot,
304
00:12:51,699 --> 00:12:53,565
and that's scary for me.
305
00:12:53,567 --> 00:12:57,286
Mostly because
you're a proven flight risk.
306
00:12:57,288 --> 00:13:00,489
How could you like me a lot?
307
00:13:00,491 --> 00:13:03,242
Well, uh, for one thing,
308
00:13:03,244 --> 00:13:05,377
you have bigger
emotional problems than I do,
309
00:13:05,379 --> 00:13:08,297
and I find that
very attractive in a woman!
310
00:13:09,633 --> 00:13:13,085
I-I don't know. I just...
311
00:13:13,087 --> 00:13:15,254
I think you're wonderful.
312
00:13:22,012 --> 00:13:24,430
I'm sweating out of my head.
313
00:13:28,351 --> 00:13:33,272
The dragon falls from the sky,
crashing into the volcano!
314
00:13:34,492 --> 00:13:36,025
But wait!
315
00:13:36,027 --> 00:13:37,242
He's not dead.
316
00:13:37,244 --> 00:13:38,694
He crawls out,
317
00:13:38,696 --> 00:13:43,415
spreads his wings
and prepares to attack.
318
00:13:43,417 --> 00:13:44,450
Yeah, uh, wait!
319
00:13:46,202 --> 00:13:48,570
Doesn't he say
something first?
320
00:13:48,572 --> 00:13:52,558
You know, maybe in the voice
of a beloved celebrity?
321
00:13:52,560 --> 00:13:54,376
Fine.
322
00:13:54,378 --> 00:13:58,213
"You'd think, after all these years,
323
00:13:58,215 --> 00:14:03,769
"I'd know not to fly
over volcanoes.
324
00:14:03,771 --> 00:14:06,105
I'm a freaking idiot."
325
00:14:08,308 --> 00:14:10,142
The dragon's
Christopher Walken!
326
00:14:10,144 --> 00:14:12,644
That's perfect.
327
00:14:12,646 --> 00:14:13,946
All right, Amy,
it's your turn.
328
00:14:13,948 --> 00:14:15,030
We need one more hit.
329
00:14:15,032 --> 00:14:17,032
Finish him off!
Here we go.
330
00:14:17,034 --> 00:14:18,584
Fifteen?
331
00:14:18,586 --> 00:14:20,936
It's a hit. The dragon collapses
to the ground!
332
00:14:20,938 --> 00:14:22,654
Wait.
333
00:14:22,656 --> 00:14:23,989
Wait.
334
00:14:23,991 --> 00:14:26,825
And says...
335
00:14:26,827 --> 00:14:29,161
"Mother?
336
00:14:29,163 --> 00:14:31,663
"Is that you?
337
00:14:32,799 --> 00:14:36,385
Your little boy is coming home."
338
00:14:38,171 --> 00:14:41,140
Oh, I don't know about you
guys, but I have been through
339
00:14:41,142 --> 00:14:43,342
the emotional
wringer tonight.
340
00:14:43,344 --> 00:14:45,561
This may be the potion
talking, but you are
341
00:14:45,563 --> 00:14:48,680
one fine-ass dungeon master.
342
00:14:48,682 --> 00:14:50,232
Oh, yeah?
Well, when we get home,
343
00:14:50,234 --> 00:14:52,101
I'm gonna take you
on a whole different adventure.
344
00:14:52,103 --> 00:14:54,153
Another quest
345
00:14:54,155 --> 00:14:56,905
by Wolowitz?
Count me in.
346
00:14:58,541 --> 00:15:01,026
Sheldon, they're talking
about sex.
347
00:15:01,028 --> 00:15:04,146
Oh, then I'm out.
348
00:15:05,281 --> 00:15:06,982
Ooh! I have an idea.
349
00:15:06,984 --> 00:15:08,917
Since it's not happening
anytime soon,
350
00:15:08,919 --> 00:15:11,370
why don't your character
and your character
351
00:15:11,372 --> 00:15:13,338
do it in the game?
352
00:15:13,340 --> 00:15:15,340
Ooh!
353
00:15:16,025 --> 00:15:17,459
Come on, back
me up here.
354
00:15:17,461 --> 00:15:18,427
Oh.
355
00:15:18,429 --> 00:15:20,829
Ooh!
Ooh!
356
00:15:21,998 --> 00:15:26,101
Okay, I cast a love spell
on Sheldon and Amy.
357
00:15:26,103 --> 00:15:29,772
Oo... Sorry, I thought
you were gonna do that...
358
00:15:31,775 --> 00:15:33,976
The love spell takes effect.
359
00:15:33,978 --> 00:15:35,394
When Sheldon looks
360
00:15:35,396 --> 00:15:38,847
at Amy, she is the most
beautiful half-orc
361
00:15:38,849 --> 00:15:40,449
he's ever seen,
362
00:15:40,451 --> 00:15:42,317
and he's overcome
363
00:15:42,319 --> 00:15:44,686
with a desire
to rip her armor off
364
00:15:44,688 --> 00:15:48,574
and gaze fondly
at her four hairy breasts.
365
00:15:49,826 --> 00:15:53,796
When Amy sees Sheldon,
he looks...
366
00:15:53,798 --> 00:15:56,865
well, just like Sheldon, 'cause
apparently she's into that.
367
00:15:58,551 --> 00:15:59,885
What do you do?
368
00:16:01,588 --> 00:16:03,222
I don't like this.
369
00:16:11,164 --> 00:16:14,716
You see what happens
when you let girls play D & D?
370
00:16:17,770 --> 00:16:20,105
Amy.
371
00:16:20,107 --> 00:16:21,657
Amy.
372
00:16:22,660 --> 00:16:24,443
Amy.
373
00:16:24,445 --> 00:16:26,662
What?
374
00:16:28,748 --> 00:16:31,233
I've never knocked
on my own door before.
375
00:16:32,619 --> 00:16:34,953
That was a wild ride.
376
00:16:34,955 --> 00:16:38,090
You don't have to come in here
and cheer me up.
377
00:16:38,092 --> 00:16:39,675
Thank you.
378
00:16:39,677 --> 00:16:41,426
Would you go tell
everyone else that?
379
00:16:41,428 --> 00:16:43,612
Because they sure think
otherwise.
380
00:16:44,514 --> 00:16:46,798
I'll tell you what they think.
381
00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:49,852
They think our relationship
is a joke.
382
00:16:50,970 --> 00:16:53,889
Well, I don't think
our relationship is a joke.
383
00:16:53,891 --> 00:16:55,641
I think
384
00:16:55,643 --> 00:16:57,092
"a horse goes into a bar,
385
00:16:57,094 --> 00:16:58,877
bartender says,
'Why the long face?'"
386
00:16:58,879 --> 00:17:00,913
That's a joke.
387
00:17:02,382 --> 00:17:06,185
It's a good one, too,
because a horse has a long face.
388
00:17:07,020 --> 00:17:09,604
Sheldon,
389
00:17:09,606 --> 00:17:12,824
are we ever going to have
an intimate relationship?
390
00:17:12,826 --> 00:17:14,877
Oh, my.
391
00:17:14,879 --> 00:17:16,879
That's an uncomfortable topic.
392
00:17:19,782 --> 00:17:22,517
Amy...
393
00:17:22,519 --> 00:17:24,720
fore I met you,
394
00:17:24,722 --> 00:17:28,941
I never had any interest
in being intimate with anyone.
395
00:17:29,776 --> 00:17:31,376
And now?
396
00:17:32,979 --> 00:17:35,530
And now what?
397
00:17:37,633 --> 00:17:40,352
Do you have any interest now?
398
00:17:42,105 --> 00:17:43,689
I have not ruled it out.
399
00:17:43,691 --> 00:17:45,090
Wow.
400
00:17:45,092 --> 00:17:47,326
Talk dirty to me.
401
00:17:47,328 --> 00:17:50,812
I know it doesn't seem
like it to you, but,
402
00:17:50,814 --> 00:17:53,198
for me, what we have
403
00:17:53,200 --> 00:17:56,418
is extremely intimate.
404
00:17:57,253 --> 00:17:59,988
I guess I know that.
405
00:17:59,990 --> 00:18:02,291
It's just...
406
00:18:02,293 --> 00:18:04,326
part of me wants more.
407
00:18:04,328 --> 00:18:06,345
More?
408
00:18:06,347 --> 00:18:07,930
I mean, look at us.
409
00:18:07,932 --> 00:18:10,716
It's only been three years;
here we are in bed together.
410
00:18:15,521 --> 00:18:17,923
Come on.
411
00:18:17,925 --> 00:18:19,524
Let's go back out there.
412
00:18:19,526 --> 00:18:22,677
Y... Well, no.
Hold on.
413
00:18:22,679 --> 00:18:27,983
My Elven magic-user
and your half-orc warrior
414
00:18:27,985 --> 00:18:31,019
did have a love spell
cast on them.
415
00:18:32,121 --> 00:18:34,122
We wouldn't really
be playing the game right
416
00:18:34,124 --> 00:18:36,358
if we didn't see that through.
417
00:18:37,176 --> 00:18:39,711
Okay.
418
00:18:41,731 --> 00:18:46,585
I believe that, uh,
we just killed a dragon.
419
00:18:48,421 --> 00:18:51,340
While the others
pillage the corpse,
420
00:18:51,342 --> 00:18:55,344
I lead you
to a secluded area
421
00:18:55,346 --> 00:19:00,548
where I attempt
to remove your leather armor.
422
00:19:05,388 --> 00:19:06,321
It comes off.
423
00:19:06,323 --> 00:19:09,274
Oh.
424
00:19:10,193 --> 00:19:11,743
What do you do?
425
00:19:14,397 --> 00:19:16,564
I...
426
00:19:17,750 --> 00:19:20,585
...kiss you... on the lips.
427
00:19:22,288 --> 00:19:26,458
I kiss you back on the...
428
00:19:28,795 --> 00:19:30,262
...lips as well.
429
00:19:31,881 --> 00:19:34,016
Your turn.
430
00:19:35,718 --> 00:19:38,387
I... remove your armor.
431
00:19:40,256 --> 00:19:42,224
What do you do?
432
00:19:42,226 --> 00:19:46,695
I... erotically caress your...
433
00:19:49,365 --> 00:19:50,399
...nose.
434
00:19:50,401 --> 00:19:51,950
Keep rolling.
435
00:20:04,425 --> 00:20:06,626
Hey, you guys have been
in there for a while.
436
00:20:06,628 --> 00:20:08,628
- You doing okay?
- We're fine, thank you.
437
00:20:08,630 --> 00:20:10,647
Okay, we just want to say,
we feel really bad about...
438
00:20:10,649 --> 00:20:13,767
Go away! Sheldon
is nibbling on my...
439
00:20:13,769 --> 00:20:15,635
14! Yes!
440
00:20:15,637 --> 00:20:20,637
== sync, corrected by elderman ==