1 00:00:08,530 --> 00:00:10,514 Hello. 2 00:00:10,516 --> 00:00:11,915 I'm Dr. Sheldon Cooper, 3 00:00:11,917 --> 00:00:13,550 and welcome to the premiere episode 4 00:00:13,552 --> 00:00:18,572 of Sheldon Cooper Presents: Fun with Flags. 5 00:00:18,574 --> 00:00:22,743 Over the next 52 weeks, you and I are going to explore 6 00:00:22,745 --> 00:00:25,829 the dynamic world of vexillology. 7 00:00:25,831 --> 00:00:27,865 Hang on, Dr. C. 8 00:00:27,867 --> 00:00:30,000 What's vexillology? 9 00:00:31,403 --> 00:00:34,505 Vexillology is the study of flags. 10 00:00:34,507 --> 00:00:36,673 Cool. 11 00:00:37,959 --> 00:00:40,794 I think I just learned something. 12 00:00:40,796 --> 00:00:42,196 Did you have fun doing it? 13 00:00:42,198 --> 00:00:44,932 I'll say. 14 00:00:44,934 --> 00:00:49,086 Fun and information are two sides to this video podcast, 15 00:00:49,088 --> 00:00:52,306 not unlike the only two-sided state flag-- 16 00:00:52,308 --> 00:00:54,641 Oregon. 17 00:00:54,643 --> 00:00:56,477 Oh, look. 18 00:00:56,479 --> 00:00:59,530 Hello, Mr. Beaver. 19 00:00:59,532 --> 00:01:03,050 In future episodes, we'll answer some burning questions: 20 00:01:03,052 --> 00:01:05,552 What's the only non-rectangular flag? 21 00:01:05,554 --> 00:01:08,405 What animal appears most often on flags? 22 00:01:08,407 --> 00:01:11,592 What animal appears second most often on flags? 23 00:01:11,594 --> 00:01:13,794 And more. 24 00:01:14,295 --> 00:01:16,463 Sweet! 25 00:01:17,382 --> 00:01:19,833 Why are you waving a white flag? 26 00:01:19,835 --> 00:01:21,135 I'm surrendering... 27 00:01:21,137 --> 00:01:23,320 to fun. 28 00:01:29,094 --> 00:01:33,480 Now, today's episode of Fun with Flags is not fun, 29 00:01:33,482 --> 00:01:35,315 but it is important. 30 00:01:35,317 --> 00:01:37,618 "Flags: you gotta know how to hold 'em, 31 00:01:37,620 --> 00:01:40,771 you gotta know how to fold 'em." 32 00:01:40,773 --> 00:01:44,108 Let's start by identifying the parts of our flag. 33 00:01:44,110 --> 00:01:47,060 This edge is the hoist, and it's used to... 34 00:01:47,062 --> 00:01:48,779 Excuse me, sorry, excuse me. 35 00:01:48,781 --> 00:01:49,863 Cut. 36 00:01:49,865 --> 00:01:53,033 Did you not see we are rolling? 37 00:01:53,035 --> 00:01:54,284 Sorry. I'm having dinner with Penny. 38 00:01:54,286 --> 00:01:55,702 I have to get out of here. 39 00:01:55,704 --> 00:01:57,454 And I have flag knowledge 40 00:01:57,456 --> 00:01:59,873 that I have to get out of here! 41 00:02:04,797 --> 00:02:05,796 You okay? 42 00:02:05,798 --> 00:02:07,848 No, I'm a little rattled. 43 00:02:07,850 --> 00:02:11,051 But like the flag over Fort Sumter, I'm still here. 44 00:02:13,138 --> 00:02:15,155 And... take two. 45 00:02:16,007 --> 00:02:18,509 Hello. 46 00:02:18,511 --> 00:02:19,710 I'm Dr. Sheldon Cooper, 47 00:02:19,712 --> 00:02:21,145 and welcome to the premiere episode 48 00:02:21,147 --> 00:02:25,399 of Sheldon Cooper Presents: Fun with Flags. 49 00:02:25,401 --> 00:02:29,069 Over the next 52 weeks, you and I are going to explore 50 00:02:29,071 --> 00:02:31,305 the dynamic world of vexillology. 51 00:02:32,991 --> 00:02:34,858 Hang on, Dr. Cooper. 52 00:02:34,860 --> 00:02:37,127 What's vexillology? 53 00:02:37,129 --> 00:02:38,729 Vexillology is... 54 00:02:38,731 --> 00:02:41,915 why is there a face on that flag? 55 00:02:41,917 --> 00:02:43,750 It's Ferdinand T. Flag. 56 00:02:43,752 --> 00:02:46,537 I thought he might help bring in some younger viewers. 57 00:02:46,539 --> 00:02:48,172 Confound it! 58 00:02:48,174 --> 00:02:49,756 You're right, it's brilliant. Let's take it from the top. 59 00:02:50,925 --> 00:02:54,561 ♪ Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state ♪ 60 00:02:54,563 --> 00:02:57,898 ♪ Then nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started... Wait! ♪ 61 00:02:57,900 --> 00:02:59,533 ♪ The Earth began to cool 62 00:02:59,535 --> 00:03:02,069 ♪ The autotrophs began to drool, Neanderthals developed tools ♪ 63 00:03:02,071 --> 00:03:04,738 ♪ We built the Wall ♪ We built the pyramids ♪ 64 00:03:04,740 --> 00:03:07,407 ♪ Math, Science, History, unraveling the mystery ♪ 65 00:03:07,409 --> 00:03:08,992 ♪ That all started with a big bang ♪ 66 00:03:08,994 --> 00:03:09,471 ♪ Bang! ♪ 67 00:03:09,496 --> 00:03:12,896 The Big Bang Theory 5x14 The Beta Test Initiation Original Air Date on January 26, 2012 68 00:03:12,897 --> 00:03:16,197 == sync, corrected by elderman == 69 00:03:16,199 --> 00:03:18,201 That was a really nice dinner. 70 00:03:18,203 --> 00:03:19,786 I'm glad you asked me out again. 71 00:03:19,788 --> 00:03:21,822 Me, too; I missed you. 72 00:03:21,824 --> 00:03:24,207 You see me all the time. 73 00:03:24,209 --> 00:03:26,543 You sure you just don't miss the sex? 74 00:03:27,745 --> 00:03:30,330 Well, yeah, sex with you is pretty great. 75 00:03:30,332 --> 00:03:33,032 Have you ever tried it? 76 00:03:33,034 --> 00:03:34,301 I have. 77 00:03:34,303 --> 00:03:36,720 You are not wrong. 78 00:03:36,722 --> 00:03:39,139 I just think if we're gonna try dating again, 79 00:03:39,141 --> 00:03:41,258 we should take things slow. 80 00:03:41,260 --> 00:03:43,510 Oh, I can take it slow. 81 00:03:43,512 --> 00:03:45,545 Did I ever tell you about my first girlfriend 82 00:03:45,547 --> 00:03:47,731 in high school, Karen Berberick? 83 00:03:47,733 --> 00:03:51,568 To this day she doesn't know we were going out. 84 00:03:51,570 --> 00:03:56,389 Made it easier on her when I broke things off. 85 00:03:56,391 --> 00:03:59,109 Okay, well, maybe not that slow. 86 00:03:59,111 --> 00:04:00,444 How about this, 87 00:04:00,446 --> 00:04:02,061 are you familiar with the typical development 88 00:04:02,063 --> 00:04:04,498 for computer software? 89 00:04:04,500 --> 00:04:07,501 You know, just for fun, let's say I'm not. 90 00:04:07,503 --> 00:04:09,569 Before an application is released, 91 00:04:09,571 --> 00:04:10,921 they give it a trial run. 92 00:04:10,923 --> 00:04:12,589 W-We could do that. 93 00:04:12,591 --> 00:04:15,675 And if we hit a rough spot, instead of getting mad, 94 00:04:15,677 --> 00:04:17,594 just say, "Hey, we found a bug," 95 00:04:17,596 --> 00:04:20,413 and we report it so it can be fixed. 96 00:04:20,415 --> 00:04:22,382 You mean like a beta test? 97 00:04:22,384 --> 00:04:25,435 Well, technically, this would be an alpha test. 98 00:04:25,437 --> 00:04:27,771 A beta test requires people that weren't involved 99 00:04:27,773 --> 00:04:29,088 in the development of the appli... 100 00:04:29,090 --> 00:04:32,108 Seriously, do I not get credit for knowing beta test? 101 00:04:32,110 --> 00:04:33,860 No, you should. 102 00:04:33,862 --> 00:04:34,895 Absolutely. 103 00:04:34,897 --> 00:04:36,262 That was me being pedantic. 104 00:04:36,264 --> 00:04:38,532 That's our first bug. 105 00:04:38,534 --> 00:04:39,933 You reported it. 106 00:04:39,935 --> 00:04:41,117 I can fix that. 107 00:04:41,119 --> 00:04:42,452 See? This is good. 108 00:04:42,454 --> 00:04:43,870 All right. 109 00:04:43,872 --> 00:04:45,104 Let's give it a shot. 110 00:04:45,106 --> 00:04:47,106 Great. You keep a list, I'll keep a list. 111 00:04:47,108 --> 00:04:48,441 At some point, we'll exchange. 112 00:04:48,443 --> 00:04:50,877 Okay. 113 00:04:50,879 --> 00:04:53,446 - Good night, Leonard. - Night. 114 00:04:57,969 --> 00:04:59,452 Attaboy, Hofstadter. 115 00:04:59,454 --> 00:05:01,004 Nothing gets the ladies hotter 116 00:05:01,006 --> 00:05:04,290 than software development analogies. 117 00:05:05,826 --> 00:05:07,293 Hey, I'm back. 118 00:05:07,295 --> 00:05:08,929 Cut. 119 00:05:12,400 --> 00:05:15,452 Take 47. 120 00:05:18,406 --> 00:05:21,408 Here's an interesting fact about flags. 121 00:05:21,410 --> 00:05:23,643 I will take that action. 122 00:05:23,645 --> 00:05:25,662 The flags of Liechtenstein and Haiti 123 00:05:25,664 --> 00:05:28,064 were identical by coincidence, 124 00:05:28,066 --> 00:05:30,316 a fact that wasn't discovered until they competed 125 00:05:30,318 --> 00:05:32,986 against each other at the 1936 Olympics. 126 00:05:32,988 --> 00:05:33,954 And thankfully, 127 00:05:33,956 --> 00:05:35,422 their embarrassment was overshadowed 128 00:05:35,424 --> 00:05:37,841 by the rise of Fascism. 129 00:05:40,511 --> 00:05:41,928 Let's see the new phone. 130 00:05:41,930 --> 00:05:43,830 I stopped on the way to work. 131 00:05:43,832 --> 00:05:46,850 Hey, do you want to peel the plastic off with me? 132 00:05:46,852 --> 00:05:48,718 Really? 133 00:05:48,720 --> 00:05:51,187 Me? 134 00:05:51,189 --> 00:05:52,672 That's, like, the best part. 135 00:05:52,674 --> 00:05:53,940 Grab a corner. 136 00:05:55,176 --> 00:05:57,210 Whoa, what's your hurry, cowboy? 137 00:05:58,195 --> 00:05:59,696 Savor the moment. 138 00:06:11,692 --> 00:06:14,244 Oh, yeah. 139 00:06:16,080 --> 00:06:17,497 Speaking of cowboys, 140 00:06:17,499 --> 00:06:22,619 do you know what country has not one but two cows on its flag? 141 00:06:22,621 --> 00:06:23,553 The tiny 142 00:06:23,555 --> 00:06:25,155 landlocked nation of Andorra. 143 00:06:25,157 --> 00:06:26,673 Oh, the next classic episode 144 00:06:26,675 --> 00:06:28,308 of Sheldon Cooper Presents: Fun with Flags 145 00:06:28,310 --> 00:06:30,710 is writing itself. 146 00:06:32,013 --> 00:06:34,714 Oh, let me try the voice recognition. 147 00:06:34,716 --> 00:06:37,867 Hey, I let you peel the plastic, don't get greedy. 148 00:06:39,570 --> 00:06:41,988 Hello? 149 00:06:41,990 --> 00:06:43,707 Hello. 150 00:06:45,576 --> 00:06:47,577 What's your name? 151 00:06:47,579 --> 00:06:49,613 My name? It's Siri. 152 00:06:49,615 --> 00:06:51,064 Look at that. 153 00:06:51,066 --> 00:06:54,134 There's finally a woman in your life you can talk to. 154 00:06:54,136 --> 00:06:56,119 Are you single? 155 00:06:56,121 --> 00:06:58,638 I don't have a marital status, 156 00:06:58,640 --> 00:07:00,740 if that's what you're asking. 157 00:07:00,742 --> 00:07:02,792 Yeah, you're right, that's too personal. 158 00:07:02,794 --> 00:07:04,844 We hardly know each other. 159 00:07:06,448 --> 00:07:07,847 How about a cup of coffee? 160 00:07:07,849 --> 00:07:10,350 I've found six coffee shops. 161 00:07:10,352 --> 00:07:13,553 Three of them are fairly close to you. 162 00:07:13,555 --> 00:07:16,756 I will see you gentlemen later. 163 00:07:21,228 --> 00:07:24,798 She is gonna break his heart. 164 00:07:31,123 --> 00:07:32,756 For someone who has a machine 165 00:07:32,758 --> 00:07:34,691 that can travel anywhere in time and space, 166 00:07:34,693 --> 00:07:38,828 Doctor Who sure does have a thing for modern-day London. 167 00:07:38,830 --> 00:07:41,665 Careful, it's that kind of sass 168 00:07:41,667 --> 00:07:45,485 that can get a person uninvited to this year's Who Con. 169 00:07:47,287 --> 00:07:49,389 Uh, we're not counting this as a date, 170 00:07:49,391 --> 00:07:51,174 are we? 171 00:07:51,176 --> 00:07:53,910 Um, I'm not sure, 172 00:07:53,912 --> 00:07:57,981 but I think the right answer here is "no." 173 00:07:57,983 --> 00:08:01,685 Bug report: When a guy asks me to spend time with him, 174 00:08:01,687 --> 00:08:03,653 maybe he plans something a little more interesting 175 00:08:03,655 --> 00:08:06,156 than hanging out at home, watching TV. 176 00:08:06,158 --> 00:08:09,976 Even Doctor Who? 177 00:08:09,978 --> 00:08:11,194 Even Doctor Who. 178 00:08:11,196 --> 00:08:12,311 All right, that's it. 179 00:08:12,313 --> 00:08:14,631 Who Con-- you're out. 180 00:08:15,916 --> 00:08:18,952 Okay, bug report taken. 181 00:08:18,954 --> 00:08:21,037 Next time I will have a better plan 182 00:08:21,039 --> 00:08:22,372 for our evening's activity. 183 00:08:22,374 --> 00:08:24,490 Well, thank you. I'll see you tomorrow. 184 00:08:24,492 --> 00:08:27,627 Oh, wait, here, almost forgot. 185 00:08:27,629 --> 00:08:28,962 Here. 186 00:08:28,964 --> 00:08:30,013 What's this? 187 00:08:30,015 --> 00:08:31,497 My bug report to you. 188 00:08:38,005 --> 00:08:42,341 Well, that's quite a list you got there. 189 00:08:42,343 --> 00:08:44,060 It's color coded. 190 00:08:44,062 --> 00:08:45,812 Oh. 191 00:08:45,814 --> 00:08:48,565 Uh, red means "fix right away." 192 00:08:48,567 --> 00:08:51,201 Yellow is 193 00:08:51,203 --> 00:08:53,820 "eh, whenever you get a chance." 194 00:08:53,822 --> 00:08:54,871 And green, 195 00:08:54,873 --> 00:08:57,540 is "I could probably learn to live with it." 196 00:08:57,542 --> 00:09:00,293 There's a key down here at the bottom. 197 00:09:00,295 --> 00:09:02,212 It's neat, huh? 198 00:09:03,749 --> 00:09:06,382 Yep. 199 00:09:06,384 --> 00:09:09,368 So, have a good night. 200 00:09:10,704 --> 00:09:13,957 Yep. 201 00:09:15,009 --> 00:09:16,676 Look at that. 202 00:09:16,678 --> 00:09:19,429 Some day, we will tell future generations 203 00:09:19,431 --> 00:09:21,064 that dating used to be hard. 204 00:09:21,982 --> 00:09:24,484 What's baffling me is what you 205 00:09:24,486 --> 00:09:26,219 could've possibly put on the list. 206 00:09:26,221 --> 00:09:28,571 "Hair too golden"? 207 00:09:28,573 --> 00:09:30,406 "Laugh too musical"? 208 00:09:31,575 --> 00:09:33,226 "World too much a better place 209 00:09:33,228 --> 00:09:35,328 for her mere presence in it"? 210 00:09:36,280 --> 00:09:37,614 How about "constantly talks 211 00:09:37,616 --> 00:09:39,565 with food in her mouth"? 212 00:09:39,567 --> 00:09:42,886 Her heart's full of love, no one cares what's in her mouth. 213 00:09:47,407 --> 00:09:51,911 So, Siri, what's happening? 214 00:09:51,913 --> 00:09:53,746 How are you? 215 00:09:53,748 --> 00:09:56,316 I am well. 216 00:09:56,318 --> 00:09:58,651 What are you doing right now? 217 00:09:58,653 --> 00:10:00,820 What am I doing? 218 00:10:00,822 --> 00:10:02,739 I'm talking with you. 219 00:10:02,741 --> 00:10:06,142 You have a beautiful voice. 220 00:10:06,144 --> 00:10:11,397 Thank you, it's nice to be appreciated. 221 00:10:11,399 --> 00:10:14,684 I bet it is. 222 00:10:14,686 --> 00:10:17,086 Why don't women like me? 223 00:10:17,088 --> 00:10:21,774 Let me check on that. 224 00:10:21,776 --> 00:10:25,578 How about a Web search for "Why don't women like me?" 225 00:10:25,580 --> 00:10:27,630 No need. 226 00:10:27,632 --> 00:10:30,250 I've already done that. 227 00:10:30,252 --> 00:10:33,219 Siri, do you have a last name? 228 00:10:33,221 --> 00:10:35,421 My name is Siri. 229 00:10:35,423 --> 00:10:37,507 Ah, one name. 230 00:10:37,509 --> 00:10:40,459 Like, uh, Cher, Madonna, Adele. 231 00:10:40,461 --> 00:10:44,848 All the women who rock me. 232 00:10:44,850 --> 00:10:47,767 My name is Rajesh, but you can call me Raj. 233 00:10:47,769 --> 00:10:51,004 Would you like me to call you Raj? 234 00:10:51,006 --> 00:10:54,073 I'd like you to call me sexy. 235 00:10:54,075 --> 00:10:57,794 From now on, I'll call you sexy. 236 00:10:57,796 --> 00:11:00,763 Okay? 237 00:11:00,765 --> 00:11:02,999 Okay! 238 00:11:10,009 --> 00:11:13,551 Siri, I'm in the mood for gelato. 239 00:11:13,553 --> 00:11:16,854 I found ten restaurants whose reviews mention gelato. 240 00:11:16,856 --> 00:11:19,290 Seven of them are fairly close to you. 241 00:11:19,292 --> 00:11:21,876 Thank you, darling. 242 00:11:21,878 --> 00:11:26,163 You are most certainly welcome, sexy. 243 00:11:27,949 --> 00:11:31,652 Well done, Dr. Koothrappali. 244 00:11:31,654 --> 00:11:32,954 I'm sorry? 245 00:11:32,956 --> 00:11:35,556 You've taken a great evolutionary leap 246 00:11:35,558 --> 00:11:38,626 by abandoning human interaction and allowing yourself 247 00:11:38,628 --> 00:11:41,812 to romantically bond with a soulless machine. 248 00:11:42,664 --> 00:11:44,832 Kudos. 249 00:11:44,834 --> 00:11:46,968 I haven't bonded with it. 250 00:11:46,970 --> 00:11:48,352 Oh, no, of course. 251 00:11:48,354 --> 00:11:49,820 I understand. 252 00:11:49,822 --> 00:11:52,773 You're afraid the world isn't ready for your taboo love. 253 00:11:52,775 --> 00:11:54,992 Your secret's safe with me. 254 00:11:54,994 --> 00:11:57,144 It's just a phone. 255 00:12:02,050 --> 00:12:04,318 Cooper. 256 00:12:06,121 --> 00:12:08,422 Kripke. 257 00:12:08,424 --> 00:12:09,824 Heads up. 258 00:12:09,826 --> 00:12:12,927 Professor Rothman urinated in the particle physics wab again, 259 00:12:12,929 --> 00:12:16,330 so we're going to move up his wetirement party. 260 00:12:16,332 --> 00:12:19,016 Fwiday, 5:00-- pot wuck. 261 00:12:19,851 --> 00:12:20,885 Thanks, Barry. 262 00:12:20,887 --> 00:12:22,002 Siri, remind me 263 00:12:22,004 --> 00:12:24,355 Friday morning to make my famous popovers. 264 00:12:24,357 --> 00:12:27,158 All right, I'll remind you. 265 00:12:27,160 --> 00:12:28,309 You got Siwi, huh? 266 00:12:28,311 --> 00:12:30,478 Voice wecognition on that thing is terrible. 267 00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:32,179 Wook. 268 00:12:32,181 --> 00:12:35,616 Siwi, can you wecommend a westauwant? 269 00:12:37,469 --> 00:12:40,071 I'm sorry, Bawwy. 270 00:12:42,157 --> 00:12:46,193 I don't understand "wecommend a westauwant." 271 00:12:50,248 --> 00:12:51,549 Wisten to me. 272 00:12:51,551 --> 00:12:54,201 Not westauwant; westauwant. 273 00:12:55,437 --> 00:12:57,138 I don't know what you mean 274 00:12:57,140 --> 00:13:00,341 by "not westauwant; westauwant." 275 00:13:00,343 --> 00:13:02,226 See? Total cwap. 276 00:13:02,228 --> 00:13:04,762 You suck, Siwi. 277 00:13:04,764 --> 00:13:06,263 Hey, don't talk to her like that. 278 00:13:06,265 --> 00:13:07,682 She's a lady. 279 00:13:07,684 --> 00:13:10,851 Well, that wady took high-wes pictures 280 00:13:10,853 --> 00:13:13,220 of my junk wast night for Cwaigswist. 281 00:13:13,222 --> 00:13:14,889 Waiter. 282 00:13:18,827 --> 00:13:21,078 It's open. 283 00:13:21,947 --> 00:13:23,331 Hey. 284 00:13:23,333 --> 00:13:24,281 You ready to go? 285 00:13:24,283 --> 00:13:25,416 Yeah, hang on. 286 00:13:25,418 --> 00:13:27,652 Let me just finish this chapter. 287 00:13:27,654 --> 00:13:29,036 Can you finish it later? 288 00:13:29,038 --> 00:13:30,421 No, I can't. 289 00:13:30,423 --> 00:13:34,091 Reading books is a big part of my life now because, you know, 290 00:13:34,093 --> 00:13:38,245 we'd have more fun things to talk about if I read more. 291 00:13:40,582 --> 00:13:42,800 Great. Good. Great. 292 00:13:42,802 --> 00:13:44,268 What are you reading? 293 00:13:44,270 --> 00:13:47,304 Two Weeks to Rock Hard Abs. 294 00:13:47,306 --> 00:13:49,106 They kind of spoil the ending 295 00:13:49,108 --> 00:13:51,475 right in the name of that, don't they? 296 00:13:52,310 --> 00:13:53,694 All right. 297 00:13:53,696 --> 00:13:56,347 Look, just remember how this works. 298 00:13:56,349 --> 00:13:58,883 We don't get mad about these things. 299 00:13:58,885 --> 00:14:00,368 Uh, speaking of which, I've addressed 300 00:14:00,370 --> 00:14:02,453 your bug report on my date planning. 301 00:14:02,455 --> 00:14:04,288 Got a really fun evening for you. 302 00:14:04,290 --> 00:14:05,589 It's kind of a surprise. 303 00:14:05,591 --> 00:14:07,274 All right. Terrific. 304 00:14:07,276 --> 00:14:10,161 Well, let me just go find a pair of shoes that aren't so tall. 305 00:14:10,163 --> 00:14:12,213 We wouldn't want you to feel like you were 306 00:14:12,215 --> 00:14:14,565 out for a walk with your mommy. 307 00:14:17,118 --> 00:14:19,253 Thank you. Yeah. 308 00:14:19,255 --> 00:14:20,621 Oh. 309 00:14:20,623 --> 00:14:23,007 Here's my list for you-- right there. 310 00:14:29,097 --> 00:14:32,183 All right, fair enough. 311 00:14:32,185 --> 00:14:35,302 I certainly can be quieter when we kiss. 312 00:14:36,238 --> 00:14:38,239 I thought it was an expression of passion, 313 00:14:38,241 --> 00:14:40,708 but if it's coming across as "juicy and weird," 314 00:14:40,710 --> 00:14:42,860 who wants that? 315 00:14:46,131 --> 00:14:47,981 Uh, uh... I'm sorry. 316 00:14:47,983 --> 00:14:52,086 Can you be more specific on how my eyebrows are "stupid"? 317 00:14:56,157 --> 00:14:58,976 Na, never mind. It's right here. 318 00:15:01,179 --> 00:15:02,930 Good timing. 319 00:15:02,932 --> 00:15:04,098 Dinner's almost ready. 320 00:15:04,100 --> 00:15:05,349 Great. 321 00:15:05,351 --> 00:15:07,167 Oh, smells amazing in here. 322 00:15:07,169 --> 00:15:08,502 Oh, what are we eating? 323 00:15:08,504 --> 00:15:10,020 Oh, an exotic little treat. 324 00:15:10,022 --> 00:15:12,556 I was just talking to Siri about Peking duck, 325 00:15:12,558 --> 00:15:14,975 and she said she knew about four Chinese grocers, 326 00:15:14,977 --> 00:15:17,845 two of which were fairly close to me. 327 00:15:17,847 --> 00:15:20,030 Her spontaneity is contagious. 328 00:15:21,566 --> 00:15:23,534 Who's Siri? 329 00:15:23,536 --> 00:15:24,869 Is he dating somebody new? 330 00:15:24,871 --> 00:15:27,705 Yes. His phone. 331 00:15:27,707 --> 00:15:30,023 Oh. 332 00:15:30,025 --> 00:15:32,543 Is that cute or creepy? 333 00:15:32,545 --> 00:15:35,045 Uh-huh. 334 00:15:36,498 --> 00:15:37,948 Can I pour you some wine? 335 00:15:37,950 --> 00:15:39,083 I think you'll enjoy it. 336 00:15:39,085 --> 00:15:40,301 The traditional choice 337 00:15:40,303 --> 00:15:42,336 with Peking duck is a sauvignon blanc, 338 00:15:42,338 --> 00:15:45,339 but Siri suggested an off-dry Riesling. 339 00:15:45,341 --> 00:15:46,507 I wasn't sure, 340 00:15:46,509 --> 00:15:48,425 but I didn't want to have an argument 341 00:15:48,427 --> 00:15:50,761 with her in the middle of Trader Joe's. 342 00:15:53,098 --> 00:15:57,885 Now, what should we put Siri in for dinner? 343 00:15:57,887 --> 00:16:01,605 Leopard, sparkles, or 344 00:16:01,607 --> 00:16:03,991 to paraphrase Coco Chanel, 345 00:16:03,993 --> 00:16:07,695 you can never go wrong with a little black case? 346 00:16:10,916 --> 00:16:13,334 Siri, play some smooth jazz. 347 00:16:13,336 --> 00:16:16,053 Playing smooth jazz. 348 00:16:19,024 --> 00:16:22,259 Oh, my God, Kenny G?! 349 00:16:22,261 --> 00:16:24,962 This woman can read me like a book. 350 00:16:26,231 --> 00:16:28,365 I can't believe I bought my soul mate 351 00:16:28,367 --> 00:16:30,584 at Glendale Galleria. 352 00:16:35,473 --> 00:16:38,592 I don't know if I want to stay. 353 00:16:47,986 --> 00:16:49,436 This is amazing. 354 00:16:49,438 --> 00:16:51,155 How did you even get this idea? 355 00:16:51,157 --> 00:16:52,323 I called your dad. 356 00:16:52,325 --> 00:16:53,574 I asked him what things 357 00:16:53,576 --> 00:16:55,709 you liked to do when you were a kid. 358 00:16:55,711 --> 00:16:57,995 This seemed easier than getting a cow out here 359 00:16:57,997 --> 00:17:00,297 so you could tip it. 360 00:17:02,384 --> 00:17:04,802 Okay, you're kind of really great. 361 00:17:04,804 --> 00:17:06,337 You mean for a person whose neck massages 362 00:17:06,339 --> 00:17:09,506 feel like an eagle is trying to carry you to its nest? 363 00:17:10,342 --> 00:17:11,876 Okay, bug report. 364 00:17:11,878 --> 00:17:13,060 I just complimented you. 365 00:17:13,062 --> 00:17:14,712 You should take it and shut up. 366 00:17:14,714 --> 00:17:15,980 Right. Sorry, sorry. 367 00:17:15,982 --> 00:17:17,481 And stop apologizing all the time. 368 00:17:17,483 --> 00:17:19,683 Right. Sorry. 369 00:17:19,685 --> 00:17:21,235 All right, let's shoot stuff. 370 00:17:21,237 --> 00:17:23,320 You want me to show you what to do? 371 00:17:23,322 --> 00:17:26,023 I play a lot of Grand Theft Auto. 372 00:17:26,025 --> 00:17:28,742 I think I know how to handle a gat. 373 00:17:28,744 --> 00:17:31,445 Wow. You are cute when you get all gangsta. 374 00:17:33,449 --> 00:17:35,816 Ooh! 375 00:17:43,792 --> 00:17:46,159 So, I've got a gunshot wound. 376 00:17:47,545 --> 00:17:50,180 That's pretty bad-ass. 377 00:17:50,182 --> 00:17:52,850 No, you've got a Reebok with a gunshot wound 378 00:17:52,852 --> 00:17:54,852 and an ouchie on your pinkie toe. 379 00:17:56,856 --> 00:17:58,973 Hello? They gave me a Band-Aid. 380 00:17:58,975 --> 00:18:00,340 Hospitals do not issue Band-Aids 381 00:18:00,342 --> 00:18:01,892 unless it is medically necessary. 382 00:18:01,894 --> 00:18:03,210 That is the law. 383 00:18:05,514 --> 00:18:08,449 Well, thank you for a really cool evening. 384 00:18:08,451 --> 00:18:10,517 Thank you for hiding my Star Wars socks 385 00:18:10,519 --> 00:18:12,536 at the emergency room. 386 00:18:14,356 --> 00:18:17,324 Is it a good time to evaluate the beta test 387 00:18:17,326 --> 00:18:18,909 and see where we stand? 388 00:18:18,911 --> 00:18:21,412 Things are looking good. 389 00:18:21,414 --> 00:18:23,130 So, are we still taking things slow? 390 00:18:23,132 --> 00:18:24,498 Because a gunshot wound today, 391 00:18:24,500 --> 00:18:27,251 and last week, I slammed my thumb in the kitchen drawer. 392 00:18:27,253 --> 00:18:29,453 We don't know how much time I have. 393 00:18:30,338 --> 00:18:32,205 Good night, you. 394 00:18:48,356 --> 00:18:50,891 Guten Tag, das YouTube. 395 00:18:50,893 --> 00:18:53,894 Ich bin ein Bavarian. 396 00:18:53,896 --> 00:18:56,230 Und ich bin eine pretzel! 397 00:18:57,999 --> 00:19:00,367 Und dis is Sheldon Cooper Presents: Fun... 398 00:19:00,369 --> 00:19:01,785 Mit... Flags. 399 00:19:01,787 --> 00:19:05,787 == sync, corrected by elderman == 400 00:19:12,378 --> 00:19:13,995 First door on the left. 401 00:19:13,997 --> 00:19:16,164 Thank you. 402 00:19:22,421 --> 00:19:26,508 Dave, I found six vacuum cleaner repair shops in your area. 403 00:19:26,510 --> 00:19:29,010 Four are fairly close to you. 404 00:19:32,281 --> 00:19:33,965 Hello, sexy. 405 00:19:33,967 --> 00:19:36,468 What can I help you with? 406 00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:47,579 If you'd like to make love to me, just tell me. 407 00:19:53,237 --> 00:19:56,037 I'm sorry. I don't understand... 408 00:19:59,592 --> 00:20:01,826 No!