1
00:00:03,921 --> 00:00:05,548
It feels like it wasn't that long ago

2
00:00:05,631 --> 00:00:07,341
we were here doing this for Halley.

3
00:00:07,842 --> 00:00:08,968
'Cause it wasn't.

4
00:00:10,845 --> 00:00:13,514
Which reminds me, before we leave,
let's get you a vasectomy.

5
00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:15,766
(CLICKS TONGUE)

6
00:00:16,100 --> 00:00:18,352
Well, that's sweet,
but today's all about you.

7
00:00:21,230 --> 00:00:23,524
So, you two ready to find out
the sex of this baby?

8
00:00:23,816 --> 00:00:24,901
- Yeah.
- Absolutely.

9
00:00:25,359 --> 00:00:28,738
Is Halley hoping for a little brother
or a little sister?

10
00:00:28,946 --> 00:00:30,114
Well, she's nine months old.

11
00:00:30,198 --> 00:00:32,825
So unless it jingles or is in my bra,
she doesn't care.

12
00:00:34,911 --> 00:00:36,787
And how about you two?

13
00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:40,291
You know, (SIGHS) for the first one,
we really wanted a girl,

14
00:00:40,374 --> 00:00:42,835
but this time around
we don't have a preference.

15
00:00:43,211 --> 00:00:45,796
Yeah. Boy, girl,
as long as it's healthy.

16
00:00:46,172 --> 00:00:48,424
Well, it's a boy.

17
00:00:50,426 --> 00:00:51,802
- Huh.
- Oh.

18
00:00:53,638 --> 00:00:56,015
Oh, come on,
you can't really be disappointed.

19
00:00:56,265 --> 00:00:58,184
Hey, I barely know
how to be a man myself.

20
00:00:58,351 --> 00:00:59,769
Now I have to teach someone?

21
00:01:00,561 --> 00:01:03,481
As the saying goes,
those who can't do, teach.

22
00:01:05,608 --> 00:01:07,276
Don't you want
a little version of Howard?

23
00:01:07,693 --> 00:01:09,237
I already have
a little version of Howard.

24
00:01:09,320 --> 00:01:10,363
(SIGHS)

25
00:01:11,405 --> 00:01:13,115
Now, I'm having a son?

26
00:01:13,241 --> 00:01:16,035
I'll have to teach him
how to play sports

27
00:01:16,327 --> 00:01:18,371
and watch sports and...

28
00:01:18,996 --> 00:01:21,123
And, and, and, and... (STUTTERS)

29
00:01:21,624 --> 00:01:23,918
He just ran out of man things.
He's in trouble.

30
00:01:26,879 --> 00:01:28,297
It's okay. We're all here to help.

31
00:01:28,714 --> 00:01:32,218
Yes, and this baby will have
plenty of manly role models.

32
00:01:32,385 --> 00:01:35,596
Now, I'm certain that whatever
Bernadette can't teach him, Penny can.

33
00:01:38,182 --> 00:01:39,892
Uh, she can pee into a bottle.

34
00:01:40,142 --> 00:01:42,478
Mm-hmm. Anything with a neck
wider than a nickel.

35
00:01:44,730 --> 00:01:47,275
Howie, there's a lot of amazing things
you can teach a son.

36
00:01:47,400 --> 00:01:51,028
Yeah, you do always know
how to pick just the right antacid.

37
00:01:52,822 --> 00:01:55,741
I don't know if I can teach that.
It's just something I was born with.

38
00:01:57,159 --> 00:02:00,121
Come on. You can build things.
You were an astronaut.

39
00:02:01,038 --> 00:02:04,292
That's true. You know, as a kid
I used to make model rockets.

40
00:02:04,375 --> 00:02:05,751
That'd be pretty cool to do with a son.

41
00:02:06,127 --> 00:02:08,296
Model rockets!
Finally! Something interesting.

42
00:02:09,588 --> 00:02:11,549
What is your preferred mode of recovery?

43
00:02:12,216 --> 00:02:14,051
Sheldon, we're helping our friends.

44
00:02:14,593 --> 00:02:17,138
Yeah, and we got to model rockets.

45
00:02:17,471 --> 00:02:19,640
That was a tedious road,
but well worth the effort.

46
00:02:21,600 --> 00:02:22,685
So, have you thought of any names?

47
00:02:22,768 --> 00:02:24,186
Amy! We finally got to model rockets!

48
00:02:24,270 --> 00:02:25,271
Why are you turning back?

49
00:02:27,356 --> 00:02:29,984
(THEME SONG PLAYING)

50
00:02:54,091 --> 00:02:55,843
- Hey, where you going?
- Back to the dry cleaner.

51
00:02:55,926 --> 00:02:59,138
Look at this. They didn't get the stain
out of my Starfleet uniform.

52
00:02:59,472 --> 00:03:02,099
Well, if you didn't make me wear
the green body paint in bed,

53
00:03:02,183 --> 00:03:03,768
you wouldn't have to
get it dry cleaned so much.

54
00:03:06,103 --> 00:03:07,104
Nah, it's worth it.

55
00:03:08,356 --> 00:03:09,857
(SKYPE RINGTONE)

56
00:03:09,940 --> 00:03:10,941
Hey, wait. It's your mom.

57
00:03:11,233 --> 00:03:12,693
Uh-oh, too bad she just missed me.

58
00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:18,532
Hey, Beverly.

59
00:03:18,741 --> 00:03:19,867
Oh, hello, Penny.

60
00:03:20,117 --> 00:03:23,454
Uh, Leonard just left. He's going to be
so upset he missed your call.

61
00:03:23,996 --> 00:03:24,997
Why?

62
00:03:26,415 --> 00:03:27,666
Because he...

63
00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:29,460
Yeah, I don't know. How are you?

64
00:03:30,711 --> 00:03:32,838
Did you mean personally
or professionally?

65
00:03:33,297 --> 00:03:36,300
Um, personally.
Like, what'd you do last night?

66
00:03:36,592 --> 00:03:38,928
I had Cuban food at the home of a man

67
00:03:39,011 --> 00:03:41,305
with whom I shared
unsatisfying intercourse.

68
00:03:45,017 --> 00:03:46,769
Wow. Okay.

69
00:03:49,271 --> 00:03:51,482
And to anticipate your next questions,

70
00:03:51,565 --> 00:03:53,901
roasted pork and sideways missionary.

71
00:03:57,571 --> 00:03:59,990
Sure, sure. 'Cause you were full.

72
00:04:03,160 --> 00:04:05,579
I haven't looked
at all this stuff in years.

73
00:04:06,205 --> 00:04:08,040
Had it. Had it.

74
00:04:08,749 --> 00:04:10,251
Burned down my garage with it.

75
00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:13,462
I had three model rockets as a kid.

76
00:04:13,546 --> 00:04:15,589
And that was the largest
space program in India.

77
00:04:17,341 --> 00:04:19,301
You have a replica Saturn V?

78
00:04:19,677 --> 00:04:23,139
Yeah. My dad bought it
before he, you know,

79
00:04:23,347 --> 00:04:24,682
abandoned our family.

80
00:04:25,141 --> 00:04:26,434
Lucky duck.

81
00:04:28,811 --> 00:04:31,730
Could never bring myself
to open it without him. (CHUCKLES)

82
00:04:31,814 --> 00:04:33,232
It's silly.

83
00:04:33,691 --> 00:04:36,694
No, it's not silly. I always wanted
my dad to build rockets with me

84
00:04:36,777 --> 00:04:38,237
but he wasn't interested.

85
00:04:38,487 --> 00:04:40,489
Ah, yes. Disappointing fathers.

86
00:04:40,698 --> 00:04:41,740
Tell me about it.

87
00:04:41,949 --> 00:04:44,827
I remember for my 16th birthday,
my dad bought me a Mercedes,

88
00:04:45,327 --> 00:04:47,663
like, a little one, like,
a starter Mercedes.

89
00:04:49,290 --> 00:04:52,293
He had barely handed me the keys
before he had to rush back to work.

90
00:04:52,460 --> 00:04:53,919
I didn't see him again till, like,

91
00:04:54,170 --> 00:04:55,671
pretty late that night.

92
00:04:59,133 --> 00:05:00,217
Anyway,

93
00:05:02,720 --> 00:05:05,473
as angry as I was with him leaving,

94
00:05:06,015 --> 00:05:08,809
building this stuff is probably
what led me to become an engineer.

95
00:05:09,643 --> 00:05:11,520
I suppose, in his own way,

96
00:05:11,604 --> 00:05:13,856
my dad also encouraged me
to pursue science.

97
00:05:14,106 --> 00:05:16,650
I mean, he is the one that taught me
that flatulence is combustible.

98
00:05:19,069 --> 00:05:21,655
And also, polyester gym shorts
don't burn.

99
00:05:22,823 --> 00:05:23,824
They melt.

100
00:05:25,826 --> 00:05:27,995
Yeah, I guess
I'm an astrophysicist because

101
00:05:28,204 --> 00:05:30,122
as a kid I said
I like to look at the stars

102
00:05:30,706 --> 00:05:33,209
so my dad sent me to Hawaii
to visit the Keck telescope.

103
00:05:33,375 --> 00:05:34,668
(RAJESH SCOFFS)

104
00:05:36,795 --> 00:05:38,339
Screw you, my pain is real.

105
00:05:42,885 --> 00:05:44,637
You know what? Forget the past.

106
00:05:45,387 --> 00:05:47,765
What do you say
you and me build this rocket?

107
00:05:48,682 --> 00:05:51,560
That sounds like it could be
a real bonding experience for us.

108
00:05:51,810 --> 00:05:52,811
Right?

109
00:05:53,229 --> 00:05:54,813
Oh, I see. You think that's a positive.

110
00:06:00,569 --> 00:06:02,613
So you didn't want to hang out
with Sheldon and Howard?

111
00:06:02,947 --> 00:06:05,324
No, they were bonding over
their sad childhoods

112
00:06:05,407 --> 00:06:07,701
and my stupid parents
were always there for me.

113
00:06:10,412 --> 00:06:11,539
What's all this?

114
00:06:11,622 --> 00:06:13,791
I'm just boxing up all the clothes
Hailey's outgrown.

115
00:06:13,916 --> 00:06:15,376
Guess we won't need 'em anymore.

116
00:06:15,501 --> 00:06:19,046
Whoa, wha... slow it down. I'm sure
there's some you could reuse for a boy.

117
00:06:20,089 --> 00:06:21,131
"Daddy's little girl"?

118
00:06:22,883 --> 00:06:24,927
Okay, well, what if we, uh,
change it to say,

119
00:06:25,302 --> 00:06:27,429
"Daddy's little girl magnet"?

120
00:06:27,721 --> 00:06:28,931
Boom! Boy shirt.

121
00:06:31,308 --> 00:06:32,309
What about this?

122
00:06:32,476 --> 00:06:34,812
Uh, okay. Pull off the skirt,

123
00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:37,481
slap a lightning bolt on the front
and you got Baby Flash.

124
00:06:38,524 --> 00:06:42,486
Ooh, stick a long sleeve under it.
Boom! Baby Sheldon. (CHUCKLES)

125
00:06:44,780 --> 00:06:46,031
Wow, you're really good at this.

126
00:06:46,490 --> 00:06:49,868
Oh, please. This isn't my first time
turning girl clothes into boy clothes.

127
00:06:52,037 --> 00:06:53,747
Why? You got your sister's
hand-me-downs?

128
00:06:54,915 --> 00:06:56,208
Yeah. That.

129
00:07:00,963 --> 00:07:03,007
Oh, I should've brought peanuts.

130
00:07:03,632 --> 00:07:05,301
You can't eat peanuts, you're allergic.

131
00:07:06,051 --> 00:07:08,053
If you die,
who's going to drive me home?

132
00:07:09,388 --> 00:07:11,682
No, I'm not gonna eat them,
it's a thing they do at JPL.

133
00:07:11,849 --> 00:07:14,059
When the Ranger Mission
finally had a successful launch,

134
00:07:14,184 --> 00:07:16,061
there were peanuts in the room.
Ever since then,

135
00:07:16,478 --> 00:07:17,855
they have them at every launch.

136
00:07:18,647 --> 00:07:20,274
That sounds like a silly superstition.

137
00:07:21,108 --> 00:07:22,818
It's more of a tradition.
(SIGHS)

138
00:07:23,110 --> 00:07:25,362
Oh! I do love a tradition.

139
00:07:26,697 --> 00:07:28,824
Could you pull over
at the next peanut store?

140
00:07:30,701 --> 00:07:31,994
I don't think that's a real thing.

141
00:07:32,369 --> 00:07:34,830
Oh, don't be pedantic,
any nut store will do.

142
00:07:36,582 --> 00:07:39,585
Uh, I don't think we can get
peanuts out here.

143
00:07:39,918 --> 00:07:41,503
Well, then this whole day's ruined.

144
00:07:43,672 --> 00:07:46,550
Now that I think about it,
maybe it is more of a superstition.

145
00:07:46,967 --> 00:07:48,636
Phew, that was close.

146
00:07:53,265 --> 00:07:55,392
(CELL PHONE RINGING)

147
00:07:57,353 --> 00:08:00,064
Oh, hey, Beverly,
you called my phone, not Leonard's.

148
00:08:00,689 --> 00:08:03,442
Actually, I was hoping
to speak with you.

149
00:08:03,525 --> 00:08:04,735
Is this a good time?

150
00:08:05,819 --> 00:08:08,280
Uh, that depends.
What time is it where you are?

151
00:08:08,489 --> 00:08:09,490
Just after 5:00.

152
00:08:10,658 --> 00:08:12,785
(CLEARS THROAT)
Yeah, that counts. What's up?

153
00:08:15,371 --> 00:08:17,831
Well, I enjoyed our conversation
the other day

154
00:08:17,915 --> 00:08:19,792
and I was hoping to continue it.

155
00:08:20,125 --> 00:08:21,126
Really?

156
00:08:21,460 --> 00:08:23,295
BEVERLEY:
Yes. You may find this surprising,

157
00:08:23,545 --> 00:08:26,548
but I don't have a lot of
what you would call "girlfriends."

158
00:08:27,591 --> 00:08:28,926
(SARCASTICALLY) What?

159
00:08:31,387 --> 00:08:33,847
Of course,
there are my female colleagues,

160
00:08:33,931 --> 00:08:35,891
but they're all Freudians,

161
00:08:36,225 --> 00:08:39,144
so the only boy
that I can dish about is my father.

162
00:08:39,228 --> 00:08:40,854
(LAUGHS)

163
00:08:46,235 --> 00:08:48,612
Well, you know, I'm here for you.
What do you wanna talk about?

164
00:08:49,113 --> 00:08:52,032
Well, last time we focused on my life.

165
00:08:52,116 --> 00:08:55,911
If we're going to be real girlfriends,
we should talk about you as well.

166
00:08:56,120 --> 00:08:58,122
Well, you know,
if we're going to be real girlfriends,

167
00:08:58,205 --> 00:09:00,290
we should get a third girl
we can trash behind her back.

168
00:09:02,584 --> 00:09:04,753
Oh, so we'd be catty.

169
00:09:04,962 --> 00:09:06,380
I like it.

170
00:09:07,464 --> 00:09:10,968
What about Sheldon's fiancée?
She seems a bit dour.

171
00:09:13,721 --> 00:09:16,557
Ooh, "Dour." Meow.

172
00:09:21,854 --> 00:09:23,313
All right, here we go.

173
00:09:23,731 --> 00:09:25,899
L-minus ten, nine...

174
00:09:25,983 --> 00:09:27,985
Wait, what are you doing? It's T-minus.

175
00:09:28,527 --> 00:09:30,362
I was an astronaut, we used L-minus.

176
00:09:31,238 --> 00:09:32,656
Yeah, but this is a Saturn V

177
00:09:32,865 --> 00:09:34,491
and when they launched those,
they said T-minus.

178
00:09:34,616 --> 00:09:36,285
It's my rocket, we're doing it my way.

179
00:09:38,620 --> 00:09:39,621
Fine.

180
00:09:41,749 --> 00:09:43,333
I'm not saying I know why your dad left

181
00:09:43,417 --> 00:09:44,752
but I think I'm getting an idea.

182
00:09:47,755 --> 00:09:52,009
L-minus ten, nine, eight, seven, six...

183
00:09:52,092 --> 00:09:53,427
'Cause you're kind of bossy.

184
00:09:53,510 --> 00:09:54,595
(SIGHS)

185
00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:59,099
Five, four, three, two, one.

186
00:10:05,105 --> 00:10:07,191
Yeah, I remember them going up higher.

187
00:10:13,155 --> 00:10:14,156
Well, that's perfect.

188
00:10:14,239 --> 00:10:15,699
I mean, the one thing
I thought I could (SIGHS)

189
00:10:16,283 --> 00:10:18,494
do with my son,
I can't even do that right.

190
00:10:18,994 --> 00:10:20,871
If you wanna see it again,
I got it on video.

191
00:10:22,372 --> 00:10:23,791
Looks pretty cool in slow motion.

192
00:10:23,874 --> 00:10:24,875
(SIGHS)

193
00:10:25,459 --> 00:10:26,794
Thank you for your support.

194
00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:28,796
- You're welcome.
- I was being sarcastic.

195
00:10:29,129 --> 00:10:30,214
How dare you.

196
00:10:33,050 --> 00:10:34,426
Sheldon, what am I gonna do?

197
00:10:36,053 --> 00:10:38,764
What do I know
about raising a boy?

198
00:10:40,349 --> 00:10:42,059
What do you know about raising a girl?

199
00:10:44,520 --> 00:10:46,855
Oh, my God, you're right.

200
00:10:48,190 --> 00:10:50,734
Well, I don't know
if that was sarcasm or not, so,

201
00:10:51,235 --> 00:10:53,153
either you're welcome, or hey!

202
00:10:58,408 --> 00:10:59,910
(CELL PHONE CHIMES)

203
00:11:01,912 --> 00:11:04,039
Leonard, did you really
just text me from the couch

204
00:11:04,122 --> 00:11:05,958
to put extra mustard on your sandwich?

205
00:11:07,918 --> 00:11:09,419
I was worried
you might not check your e-mail.

206
00:11:12,297 --> 00:11:13,298
(CELL PHONE CHIMES)

207
00:11:13,382 --> 00:11:15,133
I swear to God I will throw this out.

208
00:11:15,592 --> 00:11:16,885
That one was not me.

209
00:11:17,553 --> 00:11:18,846
Oh, wait, it's just your mom.

210
00:11:19,638 --> 00:11:20,639
My mother's texting you?

211
00:11:20,973 --> 00:11:22,266
Yeah, we've been talking a lot lately.

212
00:11:23,183 --> 00:11:24,184
Why?

213
00:11:25,394 --> 00:11:27,729
Is she sick of talking
to the magic mirror on the wall?

214
00:11:29,898 --> 00:11:32,484
No, I think she's lonely.
She's been reaching out.

215
00:11:33,694 --> 00:11:35,863
Okay, just be careful.

216
00:11:36,446 --> 00:11:38,991
You think you're getting close to her,
the next thing you know,

217
00:11:39,324 --> 00:11:40,325
you're featured in a book called

218
00:11:40,409 --> 00:11:43,245
He's Doing It On Purpose:
Raising a Teenage Bedwetter.

219
00:11:45,497 --> 00:11:46,999
No, it's not like that.

220
00:11:47,082 --> 00:11:49,084
You know, she's been opening up
about her life

221
00:11:49,167 --> 00:11:51,336
and she's actually been
really supportive about mine.

222
00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:53,255
- Really?
- Yeah.

223
00:11:53,338 --> 00:11:55,966
I've been telling her about my job
and she said she was proud of me.

224
00:11:57,634 --> 00:11:58,719
That's great.

225
00:12:01,638 --> 00:12:03,390
Never told me she was proud of me.

226
00:12:05,601 --> 00:12:07,603
Even when I stayed dry
for a whole month.

227
00:12:10,314 --> 00:12:11,815
Do you not want me
to be friends with your mom?

228
00:12:12,316 --> 00:12:15,527
Well, the... Let's be clear,
(STUTTERS) I married you to hurt her.

229
00:12:19,781 --> 00:12:20,908
You're kinda ruining it.

230
00:12:24,828 --> 00:12:26,955
Reason number 13 to feel good.

231
00:12:27,581 --> 00:12:29,583
(STUTTERS) As a launch, it was bad,

232
00:12:29,750 --> 00:12:32,252
but as an explosion, it was glorious.

233
00:12:34,129 --> 00:12:35,714
Reason 14,

234
00:12:35,964 --> 00:12:37,674
you still have all your fingers

235
00:12:38,050 --> 00:12:40,469
and boys prefer a dad with fingers.

236
00:12:42,054 --> 00:12:45,098
Thanks for trying, but you're not gonna
be able to cheer me up.

237
00:12:45,849 --> 00:12:47,476
Well, how about this, then?

238
00:12:47,559 --> 00:12:50,562
You quit your whining before I give you
something to cry about, young man.

239
00:12:51,229 --> 00:12:52,314
(SCOFFS)

240
00:12:52,397 --> 00:12:53,482
What?

241
00:12:53,774 --> 00:12:56,360
Those are comforting words
my father would often say.

242
00:12:57,945 --> 00:12:58,946
Did it help?

243
00:12:59,696 --> 00:13:01,865
I turned out great. You tell me.

244
00:13:04,201 --> 00:13:05,202
Let's get going.

245
00:13:05,869 --> 00:13:07,663
Are you gonna be this mopey
all the way home?

246
00:13:07,955 --> 00:13:09,289
I don't know. Maybe.

247
00:13:09,748 --> 00:13:13,251
There any chance you'd be cheered up
by an amazing trigonometry riddle?

248
00:13:14,336 --> 00:13:15,587
(SIGHS)

249
00:13:15,671 --> 00:13:16,838
Well, if you can't answer that,

250
00:13:16,922 --> 00:13:18,298
there's no way
you're going to get this riddle.

251
00:13:26,014 --> 00:13:28,058
Oh, hey. Hey, what do you think?

252
00:13:29,267 --> 00:13:30,352
Just because it's a boy,

253
00:13:30,435 --> 00:13:32,938
I don't think you need to put a picture
of genitals on his shirt.

254
00:13:34,106 --> 00:13:36,900
What? That's a baseball bat
with two little baseballs.

255
00:13:37,317 --> 00:13:38,694
Okay, yeah, now I see it.

256
00:13:41,947 --> 00:13:43,073
So, you know,

257
00:13:43,198 --> 00:13:46,284
I understand why Howard
is nervous about having a son,

258
00:13:46,702 --> 00:13:47,744
but are you really upset about it?

259
00:13:48,286 --> 00:13:49,287
No, I'm fine.

260
00:13:49,830 --> 00:13:51,873
It's just, I grew up
with a bunch of brothers, so,

261
00:13:52,165 --> 00:13:54,042
I thought it'd be nice
for Halley to have a sister.

262
00:13:54,251 --> 00:13:55,293
Is that wrong?

263
00:13:55,669 --> 00:13:57,129
Of course, it's wrong.

264
00:13:57,504 --> 00:13:59,256
You don't know what this little boy
is gonna be like.

265
00:13:59,548 --> 00:14:01,299
Maybe he'll be rough and tumble

266
00:14:01,383 --> 00:14:03,844
or maybe he'll be sweet and sensitive

267
00:14:04,011 --> 00:14:05,804
or maybe he'll be
all those things, like me.

268
00:14:09,474 --> 00:14:10,767
You're rough and tumble?

269
00:14:12,811 --> 00:14:14,187
You bet I am, bitch.

270
00:14:17,733 --> 00:14:20,068
But I'm also sensitive
and regret saying that.

271
00:14:26,742 --> 00:14:27,868
- Hey.
- Hello.

272
00:14:28,785 --> 00:14:29,786
You got a sec?

273
00:14:30,871 --> 00:14:31,872
Sure, what's up?

274
00:14:32,748 --> 00:14:34,833
Penny's been talking to my mother
like they're best friends

275
00:14:34,916 --> 00:14:36,376
and it's kind of freaking me out.

276
00:14:37,586 --> 00:14:38,587
Okay.

277
00:14:39,713 --> 00:14:41,923
I'm pretty sure
they're not best friends.

278
00:14:46,344 --> 00:14:48,722
'Cause you can only have
one best friend,

279
00:14:50,932 --> 00:14:53,351
and Penny has that, and (TSKS) it's me.

280
00:14:56,063 --> 00:14:57,856
Oh, really? Is she facetiming
with you right now?

281
00:14:58,273 --> 00:14:59,524
Because she's facetiming with my mom

282
00:14:59,608 --> 00:15:01,860
and believe me, that is not a face
you want to spend time with.

283
00:15:04,488 --> 00:15:06,990
Hmm. Well, I have been
pretty busy lately.

284
00:15:07,657 --> 00:15:09,326
Maybe I've been
neglecting our friendship.

285
00:15:09,576 --> 00:15:11,787
Penny knows I have a complicated
relationship with my mother.

286
00:15:11,870 --> 00:15:13,163
It's like she doesn't even care.

287
00:15:13,246 --> 00:15:15,665
And with everything going on at the lab
and planning the wedding,

288
00:15:15,874 --> 00:15:17,459
I just, I have so little free time.

289
00:15:18,543 --> 00:15:20,962
Penny doesn't know how manipulative
my mother can be.

290
00:15:21,463 --> 00:15:24,257
Did you know there's such a thing as
reverse, reverse, reverse psychology?

291
00:15:24,382 --> 00:15:27,135
Because there is.

292
00:15:27,636 --> 00:15:29,387
I mean, she must feel so abandoned.

293
00:15:29,513 --> 00:15:31,139
She's used to me
being there all the time,

294
00:15:31,431 --> 00:15:33,975
but now I have my own life
and she's just gonna have to accept it.

295
00:15:34,059 --> 00:15:36,978
And why is my mom proud of Penny
and not me?

296
00:15:37,062 --> 00:15:38,063
I mean, the real question is,

297
00:15:38,146 --> 00:15:40,190
why is Penny so afraid of me
growing as a person?

298
00:15:40,315 --> 00:15:41,316
I'm good at stuff too.

299
00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:43,026
I deserve my own life!

300
00:15:46,905 --> 00:15:48,615
- Okay, well, thanks.
- Yeah, good talk.

301
00:15:55,705 --> 00:15:57,124
You know, studies have shown

302
00:15:57,207 --> 00:16:00,252
that people distracted
by emotional issues

303
00:16:00,335 --> 00:16:01,586
are poor drivers.

304
00:16:02,963 --> 00:16:06,007
What about people distracted
by irritating passengers?

305
00:16:08,135 --> 00:16:09,636
That would be hard to test

306
00:16:09,719 --> 00:16:12,472
because irritating is
a subjective quality.

307
00:16:13,098 --> 00:16:14,349
Strongly disagree.

308
00:16:19,479 --> 00:16:20,689
(SIGHS)

309
00:16:20,772 --> 00:16:21,773
Can I drive?

310
00:16:22,524 --> 00:16:25,819
No, (CHUCKLES) you can't drive,
you don't even have a license.

311
00:16:26,486 --> 00:16:27,612
Actually, I do.

312
00:16:28,363 --> 00:16:30,824
Really? Since when?

313
00:16:31,199 --> 00:16:32,200
Three years ago.

314
00:16:32,450 --> 00:16:34,744
I went on a bit of a license kick.

315
00:16:35,579 --> 00:16:37,330
I'm also a commercial fisherman.

316
00:16:38,957 --> 00:16:41,084
Then why don't you ever drive yourself?

317
00:16:41,835 --> 00:16:43,420
Honestly, I barely passed my test.

318
00:16:43,753 --> 00:16:45,213
And the one time I drove on my own,

319
00:16:45,422 --> 00:16:48,842
I made a U-turn, got dizzy,
threw up and walked home.

320
00:16:51,553 --> 00:16:53,138
You really want to drive?
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

321
00:16:53,638 --> 00:16:55,140
This seems like the perfect time.

322
00:16:55,307 --> 00:16:57,726
The roads are straight,
there's no one around

323
00:16:57,934 --> 00:16:59,853
and you don't seem to care
if you live or die.

324
00:17:02,480 --> 00:17:04,441
Live, Sheldon, I want to live.

325
00:17:05,317 --> 00:17:07,444
That makes things a little trickier,
but I'll do my best.

326
00:17:10,822 --> 00:17:11,990
(SKYPE LINE RINGING)

327
00:17:12,574 --> 00:17:14,784
Hi, Pen... Oh, hello, Leonard.

328
00:17:17,746 --> 00:17:18,788
Hello, Mother. How are you?

329
00:17:19,039 --> 00:17:20,123
Fine, and you?

330
00:17:20,290 --> 00:17:22,459
- I'm great.
- Well, it's been lovely catching up.

331
00:17:22,709 --> 00:17:25,670
No, no, no. Wait, (STUTTERS)
hang on, we need to talk.

332
00:17:26,087 --> 00:17:27,088
Oh, brother.

333
00:17:29,257 --> 00:17:30,383
I wanna know,

334
00:17:30,675 --> 00:17:32,052
why aren't you proud of me?

335
00:17:33,470 --> 00:17:36,681
Well, isn't the real question,
why aren't you proud of yourself?

336
00:17:37,057 --> 00:17:39,517
No. That is a question

337
00:17:39,726 --> 00:17:41,144
and I ask it a lot.

338
00:17:42,312 --> 00:17:44,231
But let's stick with the one
I asked you.

339
00:17:45,398 --> 00:17:46,816
Well, why do you think
I'm not proud of you?

340
00:17:47,776 --> 00:17:49,319
Because you never say it.

341
00:17:50,028 --> 00:17:51,613
But two days into chatting with Penny

342
00:17:51,696 --> 00:17:53,657
and you can't stop telling her
how great she is.

343
00:17:53,990 --> 00:17:55,158
She is great.

344
00:17:55,617 --> 00:17:58,245
Honestly,
of all of my children's spouses,

345
00:17:58,370 --> 00:18:00,455
she's the one
that I'm most impressed by.

346
00:18:02,249 --> 00:18:03,583
- Seriously?
- Yes.

347
00:18:03,959 --> 00:18:08,171
She's confident, she's thoughtful
and she never complained about you once.

348
00:18:08,630 --> 00:18:10,465
I know what kind of strength that takes.

349
00:18:13,051 --> 00:18:15,011
So, Penny's your favorite?

350
00:18:15,804 --> 00:18:17,055
I suppose she is.

351
00:18:17,722 --> 00:18:21,518
You married well, Leonard,
and for that I am proud of you.

352
00:18:25,021 --> 00:18:26,898
I don't... I don't...
I don't know what to say.

353
00:18:27,232 --> 00:18:30,527
I'm also proud of
how hard you're trying not to cry.

354
00:18:33,238 --> 00:18:34,239
Thank you.

355
00:18:35,115 --> 00:18:36,116
Would you like to hang up now?

356
00:18:36,283 --> 00:18:37,367
Yeah, here it comes.

357
00:18:45,917 --> 00:18:48,003
Your hands are at ten and two, good.

358
00:18:48,211 --> 00:18:50,130
Steady on the gas.

359
00:18:50,588 --> 00:18:51,840
Okay.

360
00:18:52,424 --> 00:18:55,677
Now you're gonna wanna
slowly switch lanes.

361
00:18:56,052 --> 00:18:57,053
Why?

362
00:18:57,178 --> 00:19:00,598
Because there are only two
and you're not in either of them.

363
00:19:05,729 --> 00:19:07,272
Attaboy. Well done.

364
00:19:07,647 --> 00:19:08,648
Thank you.

365
00:19:08,732 --> 00:19:12,444
Last time I drove,
I was terrified, but this is fun.

366
00:19:13,361 --> 00:19:14,487
You're doing great.

367
00:19:14,821 --> 00:19:16,072
You're a good teacher.

368
00:19:18,366 --> 00:19:19,409
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

369
00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:22,037
Your son is going to be lucky
to have you as a father.

370
00:19:24,539 --> 00:19:25,540
Thanks.

371
00:19:28,543 --> 00:19:30,795
Do you think
I could try going a little faster?

372
00:19:31,171 --> 00:19:32,213
(SIGHS SOFTLY)

373
00:19:32,297 --> 00:19:33,423
Go for it, champ.

374
00:19:33,631 --> 00:19:34,883
Ow.

375
00:19:36,509 --> 00:19:38,553
Sorry. Just ease on the gas and...

376
00:19:39,179 --> 00:19:40,764
Oh! Too much, too much!

377
00:19:40,847 --> 00:19:43,058
Why was I scared of this?
This is exhilarating.

378
00:19:43,350 --> 00:19:44,559
No, it's not! Slow down!

379
00:19:44,809 --> 00:19:46,311
Don't tell me what to do,
you're not my father.

380
00:19:57,697 --> 00:19:58,865
Do you know how fast you were going?

381
00:19:59,282 --> 00:20:00,283
A hundred and twelve.

382
00:20:03,453 --> 00:20:04,454
Let me see your license.

383
00:20:05,413 --> 00:20:06,748
(BREATHING HEAVILY)

384
00:20:06,831 --> 00:20:08,166
- Okay, here's the plan.
- No.

385
00:20:10,794 --> 00:20:11,795
Fine.

386
00:20:12,587 --> 00:20:13,588
There you go.

387
00:20:16,132 --> 00:20:17,592
You know what, you can just keep it.

388
00:20:25,266 --> 00:20:27,268
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)