SAM: I didn't remember ever seeing a rocket launch,
so I tuned in the other night, but it was delayed.
There it was, all this power and potential,
just waiting for a sign, an instruction.
And I shouted:
"I understand, rocket! I understand!"
Woke my neighbor up.
[MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS]
To me.
- To Sam! - Sam.
One year ago today, I was hit by that car
that knocked me out of that old life and into my new life.
So this is to the car,
to old friends who are actually new friends,
which is kind of neat.
- Hear, hear. - I know, so awful.
- What was? - The day it happened, remember?
Oh, the day I got amnesia? Not well, no.
Oh, when they called me and told me that you were in a coma,
Sam, I cried and I cried and I prayed to God:
"God, please make me stop crying, My eyes are gonna get so puffy."
- More, please. - I had to go to court the next day.
Point is is that I am alive
and that my life is so much better than it was before.
- Hear, hear! - Yeah, how so?
What do you mean, how so?
Well, last year you had a job and you were living with your boyfriend.
And this year you don't have a job and you're living with your ex-boyfriend.
- More, please. - You know, speaking of boyfriends,
I'm gonna be spending a week at Chase's.
We're kind of entering a new phase of our relationship.
One week, huh?
A little trial run, huh?
A little test drive, see how you perform?
More, please.
A whole new start is so exciting.
It's like this year was school, and now you're graduating.
Graduating, yes, that's it. That's it. I want-- You know what?
I want one of those square hats. Don't you think?
Sam, what are you gonna do, huh?
What are you gonna do you with the rest of your life all the way until you die?
SAM: Did we leave the bottle inside? DENA: No, come on. Come on. Come on.
- I don't know. - You can do acrobats. Advertising.
No, I don't like commercials. You know what I wanna do?
I wanna do something that's actually gonna help people, you know?
Acupuncture, African relief.
Oh, my God, are we gonna go through the whole alphabet?
No. But if she wants to be an acrobat, then we're done.
Wait, hold on one second. What'd you say about the Africa?
No, you do not want that.
- Want what? - The Africa.
It's dry there. It's bad for the skin.
You wanna come back to Chapman and the Funk.
Really. We had fun there. Stop trying to change everything.
What are you talking about? I am not trying to change. I am changed, okay?
I'm not gonna go backwards, you know?
- Miss Tipsy. I'm gonna-- You need a cab. - A little backwards.
- Let's get a cab. SAM: I'm walking. Stop it.
- No. - Shut up. I'm standing up straight.
- I'm fine. What--? What could happen? - She needs a cab.
Good morning.
Whoops.
- Stupid, stupid, stupid. - What's wrong? Where are you going?
I don't know. Anywhere. My parents' house, maybe Dena's,
- if she's at Chapman's all week. - Wait, come on, stay. It's like old times.
No, it's not supposed to be like old times, okay?
I'm supposed to be new and improved. And you know what?
You're not helping very much, mister.
Well, you weren't complaining last night.
You took advantage of a drunk woman with a massive head injury. Nice work.
Look, I tried to wait until you sobered up,
but then you got naked, and I lost my train of thought.
You know, maybe Andrea's right. You know, maybe I haven't changed.
You know, maybe my true self just freed up by alcohol is my old self,
sabotaging any effort I have to change.
Look, and maybe everything in your life doesn't need to change. This feels right.
You know, don't you deserve one thing that isn't such hard work?
So, what do we do? Give it a try? Or do I still move out?
I just wanna know what you want.
I know.
And I will tell you.
When I get back.
Back from where?
Africa?
Africa. Yes.
You're not going to Africa. Now eat your eggs.
No. No, I'm not eating my eggs until Africa eats its eggs.
And you know what? You guys can help too,
because I found this website where, for $10,
you can send over a mosquito net and help a child from getting malaria.
Seems a little high for a net.
Do you need $10, is that it? Just take it out of my purse.
No, I need to go to Africa.
I can get you a net down at Spurlock's for 3 bucks.
Guys, there is a whole world out there that needs your help.
Oh, you know, you don't know.
You grew up in the '60s, you know.
You don't know what it's like to wanna change the world.
If you want to help, I will take you out,
I'll buy you a rubber bracelet and a red T-shirt.
Then we can spend the rest of the day shopping.
No, no. I am not gonna take the easy way out.
Why not? You usually do.
No, I don't. How can you say that--?
Oh, my God. How horrible.
Now we have to walk all the way around the block in these heels.
Yeah, I don't think so. Officer.
Officer, my husband. He is in that building.
That's where he works. I need to see him. That's my husband.
- Okay. - Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
And her too.
Thank you.
Oh, firemen.
All right, well, I don't anymore.
Look, Dena said that I can go and do and be anything that I want to now.
Well, that's because she doesn't know you very well.
Yeah, well, you know what? You don't know me very well.
God.
I thought that parents wanted their children to turn out better than them.
And because I am so much better than you,
you should be thrilled.
Africa.
Good for you. You're a good lady.
Thank you. That is so nice to hear.
I mean, that is really the first positive and encouraging thing--
- Okay, what is that? - Shots.
You got your yellow fever, hepatitis A, hep C, tetanus,
polio, something, no idea,
big needle, bigger needle, and meningitis.
You know, we can hardly keep up. There's something new every day.
You know, things that you don't even wanna see.
Look at this. Right there.
- Oh, my God. - Wait a minute. That might not be one.
- Oh. - Oh, yes it is.
And if you get one of those long-ass worms that hatch inside your leg,
please do not pull it, all right?
Just let it eat its way out of your skin.
And if you have to run from a lion, head for a tree.
But be sure you check the tree for snakes first.
And always check your shoes for scorpions.
You will be shipping over your own blood, right?
It's okay, Uncle Chase and I just had a little fight,
but it's not your fault.
If he doesn't want anyone drinking out of his lucky bowl,
what's it doing in the cabinet, huh?
[DENA SCREAMS]
Sam, you're supposed to be in Africa.
Shh! I am.
DENA: Don't blame yourself. A lot of people don't like needles.
It wasn't just the needles.
Because when you get there, they have lions
and snakes and scorpions.
I mean, have you ever seen a scorpion? They're like spiders with knives.
And it's hot.
And there was all these connecting flights. It was, like, a whole thing.
Let me ask you. You're not bothered that that's not your bowl, right?
Or who or what has eaten out of it? It's yours at the moment, huh?
Regina?
What are you doing?
I set three places again. Isn't that silly?
I still can't believe she's gone.
I keep thinking I hear her padding down the stairs, splashing in the tub.
She's been gone a day.
It's so quiet here without her.
There used to be such laughter in this house.
No, there didn't.
I need some air. The walls are closing in.
I wonder if we're both looking at the same star tonight.
Hyenas, yeah. They have things there that will kill you,
then they'll kill you after you're already dead.
So tell your parents all that. They'll understand.
Yeah, they'll understand.
They'll understand that they were right, that I'm not better than them.
And that's exactly what I do not want them to understand.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
Okay. Shh.
- Stay here. Watch the dogs. - Okay.
Hi.
Hey, did you wanna come in?
Because you can't.
Um...
I'm spraying for silverfish.
I don't wanna come in. I didn't even wanna come here.
But I guess you had some sort of fight with Chapman,
which I learned about in our eight-hour meeting about your fight with Chapman.
So whatever it is you do that makes him happy--
- Oh, well-- - Don't tell me about it. Just go and do it.
SAM: Mr. Cellophane, no. - Oh, my dogs.
- Sam? - Oh, Andrea.
- Oh, hi. ANDREA: What?
Hi. Yeah, huh? Oh.
Um...
Okay, you know what? They had needles and snakes and bugs with backpacks.
Sam, I don't care.
The fact that you decided not to help people,
that's all that matters. Come here.
- Samantha? SAM: Hide me.
Oh! Hi, Mrs. Newly.
Nice evening.
I thought I saw Samantha.
No. No, just me.
Doing my Sam impersonation, you know.
"Hey, look at me, I'm Sam.
I don't remember anything."
It's better with the curls.
Well, I don't know about that hairdo of hers.
I'm about to build houses for poor children and that's all she cares about?
What are you doing?
What does it look like I'm doing? I'm gonna stay with Dena for two weeks,
and then I'm gonna get myself a nice big old lion bite,
- and come back a hero. - Two weeks?
- Why? - Because that's what I do, Andrea.
You know that. I just take the easy way out.
No. I will not let you beat yourself up like this.
Now, I'm sorry about Africa,
but who has had a harder year than Africa?
- China? - No, you.
You.
Did Africa get hit by a car?
Did Africa break up with its boyfriend, who still won't move out of its apartment?
- It's been a really hard year. - Hard? Africa should be helping you.
You have two weeks. No one knows where you are.
You need to go somewhere good for you.
Okay.
Okay, but I'm not-- I'm not getting any shots.
Oh, you might.
- Three shots over here. - Whoo!
Oh, hello. Oh, hello.
[HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS]
SAM: I so needed this.
You probably saved more lives by not going.
SAM: Exactly. Exactly.
Hey, you know, maybe-- Maybe I should get a T-shirt
so that I get one of those building-latrines- in-the-sun-all-day tan lines
for when I get back. What do you think? Yeah?
- Hey. - Hey.
- Body shot? - No, thanks.
No. No phones.
No, we're in Africa.
Hey.
Well, we've been gone a whole day. I just wanna see if Chase misses me.
You think this is what Africa sounds like?
He won't be able to hear you over the blenders.
Then just let me check his old text messages.
If you make me spill this drink, you're dead.
So, um...
- Oh, Brent. Yeah. - Brent.
- What are you doing in Miami? - I just graduated.
- Me too. - Really?
- All right. - Uh-huh. Yeah.
So are your parents riding you all the time?
Like, "Get off the couch. Get a job."
That is exactly what they are doing.
Yeah, but you just need some space, right?
Yeah, just to find out who I am.
Yeah, just to cut loose, stop thinking, have some sex.
Not worry so much every single second about the future.
- Right, and just have some sex. - Not happening, Brent.
- Nice to meet you. - Yeah.
Sam.
I just checked my messages,
and the last message from Chase, he said:
"Are you okay? I love you very much. I miss you. I hope you're not dead."
- "Dead"? - That's not our usual sign-off.
It's usually, "I hope you still like me."
Why would you be dead?
MAN [ON TV]: All we know at the moment
is that Sudanese rebels have sealed off the city
with no communication or travel in or out.
DENA: Sam, isn't that where we're supposed to be?
I did it again.
I made it worse.
From Salamani in the Republic of Chad, this is Kenneth Esther Alaric reporting.
That's the name of the town.
That's where Sam is.
Well, I'm sure she's fine.
She's not fine, Howard. She's dead.
She is not dead. Will you stop that? They're not reporting any casualties.
I'm taking this very well, I think.
Well, I'll be sure to thank the pharmaceutical industry.
Also because she appeared to me in a vision on my walk that night.
To tell me she's at peace.
And that I've been an excellent mother.
God, I should've just told them the truth.
And now the truth is worse than any lie I could have even made up.
Well, I just wanna call home and tell him that I'm okay.
You saw on TV, there's no phone service.
They'll know we're fine when we get home.
We can't go home, Andrea. There is no way in or out.
We are stuck in Africa.
Maybe the hotel will give us free drinks. Like when you're stuck on the tarmac.
You are not helping.
- What--? I wanna stay. We're having fun. - And that's all you wanted, isn't it?
You didn't wanna help me, you just wanted a vacation.
I wanted a vacation with you.
You know, the way it used to be, you and me.
This whole year, I just-- I'm watching us just go like this.
And I have been trying to get you back to normal.
You were my Africa.
You know, I am so sorry that I turned out to be a better person than I was.
So am I, because where does that leave me?
I mean, where do I fit in?
I mean, what purpose do I have in your life?
Right now?
I need you to get us out of here.
Right now, I need you to dig down deep inside of that devious brain of yours
and help come up with a plan.
- I guess I can sleep with a guard. - Thank you.
- Two if I had to. - Okay, good.
And then I will-- I'll commandeer a Humvee.
No, no, you can't drive stick.
See, this is why I need you, because you know these things.
Howard. Howard, look at this.
It's a picture of this 12-foot snake they caught in Africa,
and that big bulge in the middle is what it just ate.
Now, they're saying it's a goat or a dog, but I think we both know who's in there.
No, no, no, it's in the Congo, Regina.
See, that's nowhere near where Sam was.
REGINA: Oh, a mother knows her own child.
Hey, everyone, I'm back from Africa.
- Oh, Samantha. - Sammy, oh, my God.
Oh, my God. Sam.
REGINA: Oh, are you okay? - Yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm just like--
Oh, gonna turn in because Zulu time has got me all wonky, so...
REGINA: Let us at least look at you. - What happened over there?
Oh, you know, I have suppressed so much of it.
It's probably just gonna be years and years before I can even talk about it.
But how did you get out?
One of us slept with a guard.
Andrea went with you?
Mm-hm. Then we swam.
- Yeah. Across a river. - River?
There's no rivers in that part.
- Excuse me, were you there? - Will you stop interrogating her?
All that matters is that she's home.
- Can I ask her if she saw a monkey? - No.
I knew you were safe.
I had a vision on my walk.
And you told me not to worry, and that I was a good mother.
I'm proud of you, kiddo. Didn't know you had it in you.
Yeah, well...
And don't forget to call Todd. We phoned him when we saw the news.
I'm sure he's as worried as we were.
Great.
Hey, Frank, I've been trying to call Todd, but his voice mail's full. Is he up there?
He is not. He raced out of here this morning in a state of agitation.
Said he had some shots to get before it was too late.
What? Shots?
Oh, no. Oh, no, Frank. Todd went to Africa to save me.
But you're not in Afri--
You see the needles, then you can judge.
Come on.
Hurry, hurry. Just gotta try to find some kind of itinerary,
or some clue of where he might have gone.
Here, look through these.
Oh, God, I will not forgive myself
if something happens to him and if he gets hurt.
Yes, the odds of getting hurt in Africa do go up if you actually go.
All right, I chickened out. All right?
Africa is a very scary place. Come on, Todd.
You're the only person on the planet who'd go halfway around the world to save me,
- and I was too self-involved to see it. - Sam?
Yeah. Oh, Todd.
Oh, thank God.
I didn't go to Africa. I lied. I am so sorry.
It meant so much to me that you were gonna go there to rescue me,
and I'm just so glad that I stopped you before you went. Oh, God.
I wasn't going to Africa.
- Huh? - And that's a goodbye for Frank.
No. You hurried out because you had to get shots before it was too late.
Shots of a playground with my camera. I'm doing an ad for a shoe company.
- You weren't going to Africa to save me? - No.
How could you not go to Africa to save me?
- Because you're not there. - Yeah, but as far as you know, I am.
I mean, I'm there right now. And where are you?
- You know, you're not there. - Neither are you.
- But I was going to go. - But you didn't go.
- Yeah, but how would you know that? - Because I know you.
- No. No, you do not know me. - You didn't go, did you?
- Yeah, but I was going to go. - But you didn't.
And I don't care.
Isn't that what you want? A guy who sees you for who you are?
No. No, I know who I am.
I need someone who thinks that I'm better than I know that I am.
I'm sorry?
Oh, damn it. You know, fine.
Fine. I'm just gonna be a better person, all right?
Will that get everyone off my ass?
No more taking the easy way out. I'm going to do things the hard way.
- You're going to Africa? - No, I am kicking you out.
- What? - And that is very hard for me to do.
But change begins at home.
But don't hurry or anything, you can stay here for a week or so.
So do you not wanna date?
Todd, no. Don't you see what this is about?
I never see what this is about.
Okay, so my dentist has this fun-facts poster in his office.
And did you know a rocket has to go 25,000 miles an hour to get into orbit?
Oh, and the American buffalo isn't really a buffalo at all, it's a bison.
Anyway, 25,000 miles an hour.
That's a lot of force keeping us right where we are.
So go ahead and tell your daughter to reach for the stars.
Just give her a break if she falls a little short.
What do you mean you didn't go to Africa?
Look, I'm sorry I lied to you.
You know, and you're right. I'm not the person that I wanna be.
But you know what? I'm not the person that I was, either.
And that girl that I used to be,
she wouldn't have even thought about going to Africa, you know?
So I'm trying to change.
I'm like those rockets. Those early rockets.
Who, you know, they tried, and sometimes they failed.
But they had progress.
Samantha, you did go to Africa.
- What? No. - Yes. And you wanna know how I know?
Because tomorrow, the Action News is coming here
to interview the mother of the girl who went to Africa.
Now, why would they do that if you never went?
Now, if you want dinner, go wash up.
I'm sorry, Dad.
- Are you mad? - Mad?
I thought you were gonna tell us you were moving back in.
[LAUGHS]
Well played, kid. Well played.