1 00:00:07,108 --> 00:00:09,510 - PREVIOUSLY ON CALIFORNICATION... 2 00:00:09,543 --> 00:00:11,112 WHAT DO YOU DO IN THE REAL WORLD? 3 00:00:11,145 --> 00:00:13,181 - I TRAVERSE THE GLOBE IN THE COMPANY OF MUSICIANS. 4 00:00:13,214 --> 00:00:15,083 - YOU'RE A GROUPIE. - MUSE... 5 00:00:15,116 --> 00:00:16,750 WOULD REALLY BE MORE APPLICABLE. 6 00:00:16,784 --> 00:00:18,552 MEN HAVE WRITTEN SONGS ABOUT ME. 7 00:00:18,586 --> 00:00:20,654 - I CAN SEE WHY. DO YOU WANT TO GET HIGH? 8 00:00:20,688 --> 00:00:21,722 - DOES THE POPE SHIT IN THE WOODS? 9 00:00:21,755 --> 00:00:23,757 - HAVE ANYTHING TO ROLL WITH? 10 00:00:23,791 --> 00:00:25,393 - THEY DON'T CALL IT "THE GOOD BOOK" FOR NOTHING. 11 00:00:25,426 --> 00:00:26,827 - I FEEL SO BAD. 12 00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:29,263 - I NEED TO HIT THE ROAD, LOVE. - THIS IS FATE. 13 00:00:29,297 --> 00:00:31,132 TINY TALKED ABOUT YOU ALL THE TIME. 14 00:00:31,165 --> 00:00:33,801 HE SAID THAT YOU HAD AN UNCANNY ABILITY 15 00:00:33,834 --> 00:00:35,536 TO SUCK KILLER RIFFS OUT OF HIM. 16 00:00:35,569 --> 00:00:37,138 - I WILL HAVE YOU KNOW, HANK, 17 00:00:37,171 --> 00:00:38,672 THAT I WAS A VERY GOOD LITTLE CATHOLIC SCHOOLGIRL. 18 00:00:38,706 --> 00:00:40,341 - ARE YOU TRYING TO TURN ME ON? 19 00:00:40,374 --> 00:00:42,610 - MY PARENTS, THEY HIT ME PRETTY HARD ONCE UPON A TIME. 20 00:00:42,643 --> 00:00:44,278 I'M STILL SMARTING. 21 00:00:44,312 --> 00:00:46,147 I PLAYED AT THIS STUPID LITTLE CHURCH SOCIAL. 22 00:00:46,180 --> 00:00:47,748 OF COURSE, ALL MY MOM HAD TO SAY WAS 23 00:00:47,781 --> 00:00:49,450 THAT I LOOKED LIKE A SLUT UP THERE. 24 00:00:49,483 --> 00:00:50,751 - METHINKS YOU LIKE THIS ONE, FAITH. 25 00:00:50,784 --> 00:00:53,187 - SHE LIKES HIM. I CAN TELL. 26 00:00:53,221 --> 00:00:55,289 - YOU SEEM TO HAVE A REAL CONNECTION WITH THIS ONE. 27 00:00:55,323 --> 00:00:56,324 - IT COULD BE A REAL THING. 28 00:00:56,357 --> 00:00:57,491 - I HAVE BIG NEWS. 29 00:00:57,525 --> 00:01:01,429 TONIGHT I AM MAKING LOVE TO A WOMAN. 30 00:01:01,462 --> 00:01:04,565 - KAREN, THIS IS BULLSHIT. HE POOPS ON PEOPLE. 31 00:01:04,598 --> 00:01:06,734 - THAT WOMAN IS AMAZING. 32 00:01:10,838 --> 00:01:13,574 - OKAY, SO THE REASON I'VE SUMMONED YOU BOTH TO DINNER-- 33 00:01:13,607 --> 00:01:16,177 - OH, GOD! - I HAVE NEWS. 34 00:01:16,210 --> 00:01:17,445 - JESUS CHRIST. 35 00:01:17,478 --> 00:01:19,180 - WHY DO YOU GO THERE SO QUICKLY? 36 00:01:19,213 --> 00:01:20,848 - BECAUSE IT'S NEVER GOOD NEWS WITH HER. 37 00:01:20,881 --> 00:01:23,584 IT'S ALWAYS DISGUSTING, STOMACH-CHURNING AWFUL. 38 00:01:23,617 --> 00:01:24,852 SHE'S BAD-NEWS BECCA. 39 00:01:24,885 --> 00:01:26,487 - COULD YOU AT LEAST LET HER SPEAK FIRST? 40 00:01:26,520 --> 00:01:29,123 PLEASE. I'M SORRY. GO AHEAD. 41 00:01:29,157 --> 00:01:30,791 - SO I'VE DECIDED-- - TO GO BACK TO SCHOOL! 42 00:01:30,824 --> 00:01:32,726 THAT IS AWESOME. - SHUT UP! 43 00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:34,662 - OF COURSE YOU HAVE. UP HIGH. 44 00:01:34,695 --> 00:01:36,564 SOMEONE. ANYONE. 45 00:01:36,597 --> 00:01:39,467 - I'VE DECIDED TO GO ABROAD 46 00:01:39,500 --> 00:01:41,402 FOR AN INDETERMINATE AMOUNT OF TIME. 47 00:01:41,435 --> 00:01:42,603 - WOW. - WHY? 48 00:01:42,636 --> 00:01:43,871 - I HATE L.A. 49 00:01:43,904 --> 00:01:45,273 - OKAY, WORD. I'M WITH YOU ON THAT. 50 00:01:45,306 --> 00:01:47,608 BUT GO BACK TO SCHOOL, GRADUATE, 51 00:01:47,641 --> 00:01:49,143 AND THEN YOU CAN GO ABROAD. 52 00:01:49,177 --> 00:01:50,378 - I WANT TO MAKE A LITERARY PILGRIMAGE. 53 00:01:50,411 --> 00:01:51,712 I WANT TO FOLLOW IN THE FOOTSTEPS 54 00:01:51,745 --> 00:01:53,481 OF MY FAVORITE EXPATRIATE WRITERS... 55 00:01:53,514 --> 00:01:54,615 - I LOVE THAT. - BURROUGHS, 56 00:01:54,648 --> 00:01:56,350 PAUL BOWLES, HENRY MILLER. 57 00:01:56,384 --> 00:01:57,518 - SWEETIE, THAT'S WONDERFUL. 58 00:01:57,551 --> 00:01:58,752 - GOING ON A LITERARY PILGRIMAGE 59 00:01:58,786 --> 00:02:00,288 DOES NOT MAKE YOU A WRITER. 60 00:02:00,321 --> 00:02:01,589 THE ONLY THING THAT MAKES YOU A WRITER 61 00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:03,257 IS GLUING YOUR ASS IN A SEAT 62 00:02:03,291 --> 00:02:05,359 AND GETTING WHAT'S INSIDE YOUR HEAD 63 00:02:05,393 --> 00:02:06,560 OUT ON THE PAPER. 64 00:02:06,594 --> 00:02:07,795 EVERYTHING ELSE IS A POSE. 65 00:02:07,828 --> 00:02:10,764 YOU CAN EXPAT YOURSELF ON THE BACK 66 00:02:10,798 --> 00:02:13,201 AND GO "PILGRIMATE" AFTER YOU'VE DONE SOMETHING, 67 00:02:13,234 --> 00:02:16,537 AFTER YOU'RE HAD SOME SUCCESS. - WHY CAN'T I DO BOTH? 68 00:02:16,570 --> 00:02:19,373 IT JUST SEEMS SO ROMANTIC. 69 00:02:19,407 --> 00:02:20,508 - THAT'S JUST IT, BECCA. 70 00:02:20,541 --> 00:02:22,643 YOU KNOW, THINGS THAT SEEM ROMANTIC 71 00:02:22,676 --> 00:02:24,912 VERY RARELY ARE. - AIN'T THAT THE TRUTH. 72 00:02:24,945 --> 00:02:26,747 - OH, DON'T GET ALL LOADED WITH ME, WOMAN. 73 00:02:26,780 --> 00:02:29,517 - ANOTHER GOOD TALK. - NO, SWEETIE-- 74 00:02:29,550 --> 00:02:31,652 BECCA, I LOVE THE IDEA. 75 00:02:31,685 --> 00:02:33,254 - YOU KNOW... - UGH! 76 00:02:33,287 --> 00:02:34,888 - I THINK WE CAN GET THROUGH ALL THIS MUCK AND MIRE 77 00:02:34,922 --> 00:02:36,790 IF WE JUST GAVE IN TO OUR BASER INSTINCTS 78 00:02:36,824 --> 00:02:39,760 AND ENGAGED IN A LITTLE THERAPEUTIC HATE-FUCKING. 79 00:02:39,793 --> 00:02:41,529 OKAY, FINE. 80 00:02:41,562 --> 00:02:43,931 YOU KNOW, I'M NOT SURE I'D BE INTO IT EVEN IF YOU WERE. 81 00:02:43,964 --> 00:02:45,966 YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE YOU'RE SULLIED...AND SHIT. 82 00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:48,202 - YOU LOVE THAT SHIT. - NO, NO, YOU'RE JUST-- 83 00:02:48,236 --> 00:02:52,340 YOU'RE ALL SOILED... AND SHIT. 84 00:02:52,373 --> 00:02:54,975 SULLIED...SHIT. 85 00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:57,978 [upbeat music] 86 00:02:58,011 --> 00:03:05,953 * 87 00:03:49,430 --> 00:03:53,267 [both speaking indistinctly] 88 00:03:55,403 --> 00:03:58,005 - HEY. - HI. 89 00:03:58,038 --> 00:03:59,473 HOW ARE YOU? 90 00:03:59,507 --> 00:04:01,609 - HOW'S IT GOING? - IS THIS A BAD TIME? 91 00:04:01,642 --> 00:04:04,412 - NO, OF COURSE NOT. THIS IS BECKETT. 92 00:04:04,445 --> 00:04:05,779 THIS IS HANK MOODY. 93 00:04:05,813 --> 00:04:08,282 HE'S A WRITER AND A DRINKER. - THANK YOU. 94 00:04:08,316 --> 00:04:11,619 - HE'S WORKING ON THAT MUSICAL WITH YOUR BROTHER. 95 00:04:11,652 --> 00:04:12,953 - OH, REALLY? - MM-HMM. 96 00:04:12,986 --> 00:04:14,622 - I HOPE THAT SPOILED LITTLE GINGER'S 97 00:04:14,655 --> 00:04:16,457 TREATING YOU ALL RIGHT. - YEAH. 98 00:04:16,490 --> 00:04:17,991 NOW, HE'S SWEET, ACTUALLY. 99 00:04:18,025 --> 00:04:20,027 I JUST GOT TO SLAP HIM UPSIDE THE HEAD EVERY NOW AND THEN... 100 00:04:20,060 --> 00:04:21,629 - [laughs] - OR GIVE HIM A TITTY TWISTER. 101 00:04:21,662 --> 00:04:22,896 - [laughs] DON'T I KNOW IT. 102 00:04:22,930 --> 00:04:24,932 - BECKETT JUST GOT OFF THE ROAD. 103 00:04:24,965 --> 00:04:27,401 - YEAH, FAITH'S BEEN KIND ENOUGH TO HOUSE-SIT FOR ME 104 00:04:27,435 --> 00:04:29,337 WHILE I'VE BEEN GONE. - AH. 105 00:04:29,370 --> 00:04:32,005 - AND WHAT IS MY REWARD? I GET KICKED TO THE CURB. 106 00:04:32,039 --> 00:04:35,042 - COME ON. I MET A MODEL IN AUSTRALIA, 107 00:04:35,075 --> 00:04:37,678 SO SHE'S MOVING IN. WHO KNOWS? 108 00:04:37,711 --> 00:04:39,046 SHE MIGHT EVEN BE THE ONE. 109 00:04:39,079 --> 00:04:41,515 - OH, BABY, GOOD LUCK WITH THAT. 110 00:04:41,549 --> 00:04:43,584 - WELL, I GOT TO TRY, RIGHT? YOU GOT TO KEEP TRYING. 111 00:04:43,617 --> 00:04:44,852 - YOU DO? 112 00:04:44,885 --> 00:04:46,354 - IT'S NOT AS IF YOU'RE EVER GONNA 113 00:04:46,387 --> 00:04:47,621 LET ME MAKE AN HONEST GROUPIE OUT OF YOU. 114 00:04:47,655 --> 00:04:48,622 - WELL, YOU NEVER ASKED, SO... 115 00:04:48,656 --> 00:04:49,823 - HEY, DOES ATTICUS KNOW 116 00:04:49,857 --> 00:04:51,959 ABOUT THIS SPECIAL LITTLE FRIENDSHIP? 117 00:04:51,992 --> 00:04:53,661 - FUCK, NO. - OH, GOD, NO. 118 00:04:53,694 --> 00:04:54,962 IT WOULD ABSOLUTELY DESTROY HIM. 119 00:04:54,995 --> 00:04:56,464 HIS HEAD WOULD EXPLODE. - WHICH WOULD FUCK UP 120 00:04:56,497 --> 00:04:58,065 THAT FABULOUS WEAVE HE'S GOT GOING. 121 00:04:58,098 --> 00:04:59,800 LET'S DO IT. - [chuckles] 122 00:04:59,833 --> 00:05:01,669 - OH, I LIKE THIS GUY. 123 00:05:01,702 --> 00:05:04,071 - YEAH, HE'S OKAY. 124 00:05:04,104 --> 00:05:07,074 [rock music] 125 00:05:07,107 --> 00:05:10,378 - * HERE SHE COMES NOW, CHECK HER STYLE * 126 00:05:10,411 --> 00:05:12,346 * 127 00:05:12,380 --> 00:05:16,016 * SHE'S GOT GOLDEN EARRINGS, DIAMOND SMILES * 128 00:05:16,049 --> 00:05:18,752 - YOU OKAY? - YEAH. WHY? 129 00:05:18,786 --> 00:05:21,689 - I DON'T KNOW--YOU KIND OF GOT THE BUM'S RUSH BACK THERE. 130 00:05:21,722 --> 00:05:25,058 HEY! - COMES WITH THE TERRITORY. 131 00:05:25,092 --> 00:05:27,595 GUY GOES ON TOUR FOR THE BETTER PART OF A YEAR, 132 00:05:27,628 --> 00:05:29,430 HE'S GONNA COME BACK WITH SOMETHING... 133 00:05:29,463 --> 00:05:32,966 OR SOMEONE. 134 00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:34,468 I DON'T NEED YOUR PITY, HANK. 135 00:05:34,502 --> 00:05:36,370 - OKAY, WELL, THEN I WILL RETRACT IT, 136 00:05:36,404 --> 00:05:39,540 AND YOU WILL SEE NEITHER HIDE NOR HAIR OF IT EVER AGAIN. 137 00:05:39,573 --> 00:05:40,841 - THANK YOU. 138 00:05:40,874 --> 00:05:43,110 - BUT HOW DO YOU LIVE? - WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 139 00:05:43,143 --> 00:05:46,580 - WELL, YOU DON'T WORK. YOU JUST KIND OF... 140 00:05:46,614 --> 00:05:48,081 - FLOAT? - YEAH. 141 00:05:48,115 --> 00:05:51,118 - YES, I DO. AND I LIKE IT THAT WAY. 142 00:05:51,151 --> 00:05:53,887 - HERE'S YOUR BEERS. - THANK YOU, SIR. 143 00:05:53,921 --> 00:05:55,889 THINGS JUST HAVE A WAY OF WORKING OUT. 144 00:05:55,923 --> 00:05:58,392 AND MEN HAVE BEEN ESPECIALLY KIND TO ME. 145 00:05:58,426 --> 00:06:01,562 - UNDERSTANDABLY SO. BUT WHAT IS NEXT? 146 00:06:01,595 --> 00:06:02,830 - I'M NOT SURE YET. 147 00:06:02,863 --> 00:06:04,598 I THINK WE SHOULD KEEP DRINKING, 148 00:06:04,632 --> 00:06:06,534 AND SOMETHING WILL EVENTUALLY SUGGEST ITSELF. 149 00:06:06,567 --> 00:06:09,136 - THAT'S WHAT MY MOM ALWAYS USED TO SAY. 150 00:06:09,169 --> 00:06:11,071 - YOU CAN CRASH AT CHARLIE'S IF YOU NEED TO. 151 00:06:11,104 --> 00:06:14,408 - BUT WHERE WOULD I SLEEP? 152 00:06:16,043 --> 00:06:19,913 [cell phone rings] 153 00:06:24,618 --> 00:06:27,755 - WHAT? 154 00:06:27,788 --> 00:06:29,089 TELEMARKETERS? 155 00:06:29,122 --> 00:06:31,725 - WORSE--MY MOTHER. SHE'S A BIT OF A CUNT. 156 00:06:31,759 --> 00:06:35,128 SCRATCH THAT--SHE TAKES THE WARM AND FUZZY OUT OF "CUNT." 157 00:06:35,162 --> 00:06:37,197 - OOH, I LIKE THAT. AND I'M GONNA STEAL THAT. 158 00:06:37,230 --> 00:06:40,033 FAIR WARNING-- ONE DAY I WILL USE THAT. 159 00:06:40,067 --> 00:06:41,502 - OH, BE MY GUEST. 160 00:06:41,535 --> 00:06:43,737 I GUARANTEE YOU SHE WANTS ME TO COME HOME. 161 00:06:43,771 --> 00:06:45,473 - MOMS ARE GOOD LIKE THAT. YEP. 162 00:06:45,506 --> 00:06:50,511 - WELL, WHEN I DO, IT'S ALWAYS A FUCKING DISASTER. 163 00:06:50,544 --> 00:06:52,913 SHE DOESN'T EXACTLY APPROVE OF THE LIFESTYLE. 164 00:06:52,946 --> 00:06:54,448 - MOMS ARE GOOD LIKE THAT TOO. 165 00:06:54,482 --> 00:06:56,917 HOW LONG'S IT BEEN? - FUCK IF I KNOW, DUDE. 166 00:06:56,950 --> 00:06:58,686 I'VE BEEN WITH THE CIRCUS A WHILE. 167 00:06:58,719 --> 00:07:00,988 SO LET'S JUST SAY IT'S BEEN A SPELL. 168 00:07:01,021 --> 00:07:02,623 - IF YOU WANT SOME ADVICE FROM A GUY 169 00:07:02,656 --> 00:07:04,925 WHO'S WATCHING HIS DAUGHTER SOW SOME OF HER WILDER OATS, 170 00:07:04,958 --> 00:07:06,226 YOU SHOULD GO VISIT 'EM. 171 00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:10,864 WHAT'S THE HARM? JUST THROW 'EM A BONE. 172 00:07:10,898 --> 00:07:14,702 - OKAY. I'LL GO IF YOU GO. 173 00:07:14,735 --> 00:07:16,937 - WHAT? - COME ON. 174 00:07:16,970 --> 00:07:18,839 IT'LL BE SUPER AWESOME BRINGING HOME 175 00:07:18,872 --> 00:07:20,741 A RELATIVELY NORMAL BOYFRIEND TYPE. 176 00:07:20,774 --> 00:07:23,110 - THANK YOU. GEE, THANKS. 177 00:07:23,143 --> 00:07:24,812 - DON'T GET ME WRONG-- YOU ARE AS SICK AS THEY COME, 178 00:07:24,845 --> 00:07:26,547 BUT YOU'RE A LITTLE BIT BETTER AT PASSING FOR NORMAL. 179 00:07:26,580 --> 00:07:27,981 - DO I HAVE TO GET ON A PLANE? 180 00:07:28,015 --> 00:07:31,485 - NOPE. JUST THE 405. 181 00:07:31,519 --> 00:07:35,088 * SHE SAYS, "MAN, I GOT TO GET OUT OF THIS TOWN * 182 00:07:35,122 --> 00:07:39,192 * "MAN, I GOT TO GET OUT OF THIS PAIN * 183 00:07:39,226 --> 00:07:43,096 * "MAN, I GOT TO GET OUT OF THIS TOWN * 184 00:07:43,130 --> 00:07:44,965 * "OUT OF THIS TOWN 185 00:07:44,998 --> 00:07:47,768 * AND OUT OF L.A." 186 00:07:47,801 --> 00:07:56,043 * 187 00:07:59,680 --> 00:08:01,248 - [sighs] 188 00:08:01,281 --> 00:08:04,752 - LET'S DO IT. - PRETTY SWEET, HUH? 189 00:08:04,785 --> 00:08:06,987 - I KNOW THIS PLACE. 190 00:08:07,020 --> 00:08:08,556 I GREW UP IN THIS PLACE. - [chuckles] 191 00:08:08,589 --> 00:08:11,258 - IT WAS ABOUT 3,000 MILES AWAY, THOUGH. 192 00:08:11,291 --> 00:08:14,194 - OH... I DON'T KNOW-- 193 00:08:14,227 --> 00:08:16,229 GETTING BACK IN THE CAR AND DRIVING REALLY FAST 194 00:08:16,263 --> 00:08:18,732 INTO A WALL IS LOOKING PRETTY FUCKING APPEALING RIGHT NOW. 195 00:08:18,766 --> 00:08:20,734 - OH, COME ON, IT'S TIME TO FACE THE MUZAK. 196 00:08:20,768 --> 00:08:23,203 - TOO LATE. 197 00:08:23,236 --> 00:08:26,106 [engine sputtering] 198 00:08:26,139 --> 00:08:29,743 - FAITH? IS THAT YOU? 199 00:08:29,777 --> 00:08:31,144 - HEY, MOM. - I'VE BEEN CALLING YOU. 200 00:08:31,178 --> 00:08:33,046 I'VE BEEN LEAVING MESSAGES. 201 00:08:33,080 --> 00:08:35,616 - WELL, I THOUGHT I WOULD SURPRISE YOU. 202 00:08:35,649 --> 00:08:36,717 SO...SURPRISE. 203 00:08:36,750 --> 00:08:39,052 - I'M SURPRISED. - [laughing] SURPRISE. 204 00:08:39,086 --> 00:08:43,023 HEY. - OH, LOOK AT YOU. 205 00:08:43,056 --> 00:08:45,893 - OKAY, JUST SAY IT. - WHAT? 206 00:08:45,926 --> 00:08:47,294 - COME ON, JUST GO AHEAD AND SAY IT, 207 00:08:47,327 --> 00:08:49,997 AND THEN WE CAN MOVE ON. - OKAY, YOU LOOK LIKE A SLUT. 208 00:08:50,030 --> 00:08:51,264 I'M SORRY. - THANK YOU, MOM. 209 00:08:51,298 --> 00:08:53,033 MISSION ACCOMPLISHED. 210 00:08:53,066 --> 00:08:55,035 - OH, WHO'S YOUR, UH, FRIEND? 211 00:08:55,068 --> 00:08:58,305 - HI, MRS. FAITH'S MOM. - OH! 212 00:08:58,338 --> 00:09:01,041 - NICE TO MEET YOU. - THIS IS HANK MOODY, MOM. 213 00:09:01,074 --> 00:09:03,176 - HANK THE HUGGER. - [chuckles] 214 00:09:03,210 --> 00:09:04,645 THAT'S WHAT WE CALL HIM. 215 00:09:04,678 --> 00:09:06,780 - IS HE YOUR BOYFRIEND? - ISH. 216 00:09:06,814 --> 00:09:08,348 - "FRENEMY," REALLY. 217 00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:12,185 - WHERE'S ALL THE TATTOOS AND THE LONG, FILTHY HAIR? 218 00:09:12,219 --> 00:09:15,055 - OH, I-I-I LEFT THOSE IN THE CAR. 219 00:09:15,088 --> 00:09:16,924 I WAS TRYING TO MAKE A GOOD IMPRESSION. 220 00:09:16,957 --> 00:09:19,760 - OH, GOOD. YOU CAN HELP ME WITH THE GROCERIES. 221 00:09:23,931 --> 00:09:26,133 JACK, WHERE ARE YOU? 222 00:09:26,166 --> 00:09:29,770 I'VE GOT A SURPRISE. 223 00:09:29,803 --> 00:09:31,338 - OH. 224 00:09:31,371 --> 00:09:34,274 YOU DIDN'T TELL ME YOU GREW UP IN A RELIGIOUS SUPPLY STORE. 225 00:09:34,307 --> 00:09:37,044 - OH, WELL, THAT'S WHY I'M SUCH A SLUT. 226 00:09:37,077 --> 00:09:38,712 - YEAH. - JACK, GUESS WHAT. 227 00:09:38,746 --> 00:09:41,649 FAITH'S HERE. [television droning] 228 00:09:41,682 --> 00:09:46,754 HE'S WATCHING TV. WHAT ELSE WOULD HE BE DOING? 229 00:09:48,388 --> 00:09:51,091 JESUS CHRIST! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 230 00:09:51,124 --> 00:09:53,694 - WHAT? - YOU'RE WATCHING NASTY MOVIES? 231 00:09:53,727 --> 00:09:56,163 - OH, THE HELL I AM. I WAS JUST SWITCHING THROUGH THE CHANNELS, 232 00:09:56,196 --> 00:09:57,765 AND THIS ONE CAUGHT MY EYE. 233 00:09:57,798 --> 00:09:59,633 - OF COURSE IT DID, BECAUSE IT'S NAKED WOMEN. 234 00:09:59,667 --> 00:10:01,401 I'M SURPRISED YOU'RE NOT TOUCHING YOURSELF. 235 00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:02,903 - WELL, WHO ELSE IS GOING TO? 236 00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:05,105 - WILL YOU WATCH YOUR MOUTH? FAITH IS HERE. 237 00:10:05,138 --> 00:10:08,041 - WHAT? WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME? 238 00:10:08,075 --> 00:10:10,978 - TURN THAT OFF BEFORE SHE GETS IN HERE! 239 00:10:11,011 --> 00:10:12,813 [television beeps] - FAITH. 240 00:10:12,846 --> 00:10:14,181 - DAD. 241 00:10:14,214 --> 00:10:17,017 - HI. AHH. [chuckles] 242 00:10:17,050 --> 00:10:19,352 WHO'S THIS CLOWN? 243 00:10:19,386 --> 00:10:21,421 - HANK MOODY, SIR. NICE TO MEET YOU. 244 00:10:21,454 --> 00:10:22,990 - WHERE'S THE TATTOO AND LONG HAIR? 245 00:10:23,023 --> 00:10:25,192 - IT WOULD APPEAR YOU HAVE A TYPE, YOUNG LADY. 246 00:10:25,225 --> 00:10:26,894 - WELL... - YOU STAYING FOR DINNER? 247 00:10:26,927 --> 00:10:29,062 - WHY NOT? [both laugh] 248 00:10:29,096 --> 00:10:30,664 HEY, DO ME A FAVOR. 249 00:10:30,698 --> 00:10:32,299 WILL YOU RUN TO THE LIQUOR STORE AND GET ME SOME BOOZE? 250 00:10:32,332 --> 00:10:33,967 YOUR MOTHER REFUSES TO BUY IT FOR ME. 251 00:10:34,001 --> 00:10:35,936 [mockingly] SHE--SHE THINKS I DRINK TOO MUCH. 252 00:10:35,969 --> 00:10:37,237 - SHE'S PROBABLY RIGHT, DAD. 253 00:10:37,270 --> 00:10:38,839 - WELL, WOULDN'T YOU? 254 00:10:38,872 --> 00:10:40,674 - HEY, YOU LIKE TO DRINK? 255 00:10:40,708 --> 00:10:42,009 - DOES THE POPE SHIT IN THE WOODS? 256 00:10:42,042 --> 00:10:43,677 - YOU BETTER WATCH IT, PAL. 257 00:10:43,711 --> 00:10:45,846 THAT WOMAN WILL BURN YOU AT THE STAKE 258 00:10:45,879 --> 00:10:46,880 FOR TALKING LIKE THAT. 259 00:10:46,914 --> 00:10:49,817 [rock music] 260 00:10:49,850 --> 00:10:53,687 * 261 00:10:58,458 --> 00:11:01,762 - WHAT WAS THAT FOR? NO, NO, DON'T TELL ME. 262 00:11:01,795 --> 00:11:04,231 JUST--JUST DO IT AGAIN. 263 00:11:04,264 --> 00:11:07,901 OKAY, NOW, WHAT WAS THAT FOR? 264 00:11:07,935 --> 00:11:10,170 - FOR ENCOURAGING ME TO COME. 265 00:11:10,203 --> 00:11:11,905 - OH, I ALWAYS ENCOURAGE WOMEN TO COME. 266 00:11:11,939 --> 00:11:14,808 IT--IT DOES NOT ALWAYS HAPPEN, BUT I LIKE TO THINK 267 00:11:14,842 --> 00:11:16,944 THAT I'M AT LEAST ENCOURAGING. 268 00:11:16,977 --> 00:11:20,948 - CLASSY. - IS THAT...? 269 00:11:20,981 --> 00:11:25,819 FAITH? IS THAT YOU? 270 00:11:25,853 --> 00:11:27,788 OH, MY GOD, IT IS YOU. 271 00:11:27,821 --> 00:11:30,323 HOLY SHIT. YOU LOOK FUCKING AMAZING! 272 00:11:30,357 --> 00:11:33,026 - THANKS. YOU TOO. - SHANNON. 273 00:11:33,060 --> 00:11:34,227 SHANNON MITCHELL. 274 00:11:34,261 --> 00:11:37,064 - NO, OF COURSE. SHANNON--HI. HI. 275 00:11:37,097 --> 00:11:38,732 - I LOOK LIKE A FUCKING FAT PIG. 276 00:11:38,766 --> 00:11:40,200 THAT'S PROBABLY WHY YOU DON'T EVEN RECOGNIZE ME. 277 00:11:40,233 --> 00:11:42,736 - OH, STOP, STOP. THIS IS AMAZING. 278 00:11:42,770 --> 00:11:44,905 YOU'RE FIRST? - PBBBT. I WISH, DUDE. 279 00:11:44,938 --> 00:11:46,406 MY THIRD. - WOW. 280 00:11:46,439 --> 00:11:48,141 - WHO'S THAT GUY? IS THAT YOUR HUSBAND? 281 00:11:48,175 --> 00:11:49,276 - NO. NO, NO, NO. - GOD, NO. 282 00:11:49,309 --> 00:11:52,145 - FIANCE. CHARLES WOLFGANG RUNKLE. 283 00:11:52,179 --> 00:11:54,147 NICE TO MEET YOU. - NICE TO MEET YOU. 284 00:11:54,181 --> 00:11:56,349 [laughter] CONGRATS. 285 00:11:56,383 --> 00:11:57,951 - THANK YOU. - THIS IS SO WEIRD. 286 00:11:57,985 --> 00:12:00,253 I NEVER THOUGHT YOU'D HAVE A FIANCE. 287 00:12:00,287 --> 00:12:02,355 I HEARD YOU WERE, LIKE, OUT THERE SLUTTING AROUND, 288 00:12:02,389 --> 00:12:03,891 LIKE, FUCKING A BUNCH OF ROCK DUDES. 289 00:12:03,924 --> 00:12:06,426 SOMEBODY SAID THEY SAW YOU IN A MUSIC VIDEO, 290 00:12:06,459 --> 00:12:08,428 OR, LIKE, ON A SEX TAPE OR SOMETHING. 291 00:12:08,461 --> 00:12:10,230 - WELL, WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE, REALLY? 292 00:12:10,263 --> 00:12:12,299 - DON'T BELIEVE EVERYTHING YOU HEAR. 293 00:12:12,332 --> 00:12:13,466 - THIS GIRL RIGHT HERE-- 294 00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:15,502 SHE USED TO BE QUIET AS A MOUSE. 295 00:12:15,535 --> 00:12:17,838 ALWAYS HAD HER FACE BURIED IN SOME BOOK. 296 00:12:17,871 --> 00:12:19,940 AND THEN ONE DAY SHE EXPLODED. 297 00:12:19,973 --> 00:12:22,509 SHE GOT SUPER HOT AND FUCKED EVERYONE. 298 00:12:22,542 --> 00:12:24,544 - OH, GOOD FOR YOU, HONEY. - OKAY. ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. 299 00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:26,446 THAT'S NOT ENTIRELY TRUE. 300 00:12:26,479 --> 00:12:28,882 - SHE FUCKED MY HUSBAND, EVEN. 301 00:12:28,916 --> 00:12:31,785 - REALLY? DID I? - YEAH. LARRY WALTERS. 302 00:12:31,819 --> 00:12:33,553 REMEMBER, YOU FUCKED LARRY WALTERS? 303 00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:36,423 - LARRY WALTERS. - I--VAGUELY, YEAH. 304 00:12:36,456 --> 00:12:38,892 - HE PLAYED GUITAR FOR MYSSTERY, TWO "S"s. 305 00:12:38,926 --> 00:12:40,560 WELL, HE SURE REMEMBERS YOU. - GUITAR PLAYER. 306 00:12:40,593 --> 00:12:43,563 - LARRY. DUDE, GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE. 307 00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:45,999 IT'S FAITH FROM AMERICAN MARTYRS. 308 00:12:46,033 --> 00:12:48,401 - OH, FAITH. HOLY SHIT! 309 00:12:48,435 --> 00:12:51,271 - LARRY... LOOKING GOOD. HEY. 310 00:12:51,304 --> 00:12:52,505 - THIS IS SO AWESOME. - HEY. 311 00:12:52,539 --> 00:12:53,974 - SO FUCKING ABSO-- IT JUST IS. 312 00:12:54,007 --> 00:12:55,342 - SIR, DON'T FORGET YOUR CHANGE. 313 00:12:55,375 --> 00:12:56,977 - HOW'S YOUR MOM AND DAD, FAITH? 314 00:12:57,010 --> 00:12:58,478 I BET THEY'RE SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU, 315 00:12:58,511 --> 00:13:00,480 'CAUSE YOU NEVER COME HOME, EVER. 316 00:13:00,513 --> 00:13:02,382 I SEE YOUR MOM IN TARGET SOMETIMES, 317 00:13:02,415 --> 00:13:04,384 AND SHE TRIES TO TELL EVERYONE THAT YOU RAN OFF 318 00:13:04,417 --> 00:13:07,120 AND JOINED THE PEACE CORPS, WHICH IS FUNNY, 319 00:13:07,154 --> 00:13:08,889 'CAUSE WE ALL KNOW THAT YOU, LIKE, JUST HOPPED 320 00:13:08,922 --> 00:13:11,491 ON A ROCK-AND-ROLL TOUR BUS AND NEVER LOOKED BACK. 321 00:13:11,524 --> 00:13:13,526 I GUESS MAYBE SHE'S STILL KIND OF EMBARRASSED 322 00:13:13,560 --> 00:13:15,162 ABOUT ALL THAT STUFF THAT-- - YEAH, WELL, YOU KNOW... 323 00:13:15,195 --> 00:13:16,596 - WHAT--WHAT HAPPENED? - IT'S--IT'S NOT-- 324 00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:18,331 IT'S ANOTHER STORY FOR ANOTHER DAY. 325 00:13:18,365 --> 00:13:19,399 - OH, WELL, THEN... 326 00:13:19,432 --> 00:13:21,001 - WE SHOULD GET TOGETHER... 327 00:13:21,034 --> 00:13:22,335 GRAB A DRINK. 328 00:13:22,369 --> 00:13:24,604 - YEAH, WE TOTALLY SHOULD. - WE TOTALLY SHOULD. 329 00:13:24,637 --> 00:13:26,506 - YOU PROBABLY SHOULDN'T BE DRINKING IN YOUR CONDITION. 330 00:13:26,539 --> 00:13:29,342 - PBBBT. COME ON, SPRITZERS DON'T HURT-- 331 00:13:29,376 --> 00:13:31,378 LITTLE PUFF OF WEED EVERY NOW AND THEN. 332 00:13:31,411 --> 00:13:33,380 THEY TRY TO TELL YOU IT HURTS THE BABY. 333 00:13:33,413 --> 00:13:34,547 IT DON'T. 334 00:13:34,581 --> 00:13:36,984 - I THINK CLETUS THE FETUS IN THERE 335 00:13:37,017 --> 00:13:38,251 MIGHT DISAGREE WITH YOU. 336 00:13:38,285 --> 00:13:41,288 - HE'S FINE. HE'S SEEN A LOT. 337 00:13:41,321 --> 00:13:43,423 - OW. OW! OH. - WHAT? WHAT? 338 00:13:43,456 --> 00:13:44,892 - OOH. LOOK AT THAT. 339 00:13:44,925 --> 00:13:47,360 OH, LOOK AT THAT, HONEY. I SHOULD PROBABLY-- 340 00:13:47,394 --> 00:13:48,862 WE SHOULD TAKE THIS TOGETHER. - OH, WE SHOULD. 341 00:13:48,896 --> 00:13:50,063 - WE SHOULD PROBABLY GET THIS. 342 00:13:50,097 --> 00:13:51,464 - YOUR PHONE'S NOT RINGING. 343 00:13:51,498 --> 00:13:53,200 - I HAVE IT ON SILENT. YOU DIDN'T HEAR THAT? 344 00:13:53,233 --> 00:13:54,902 - YEAH, BUT THERE'S NOTHING ON THE SCREEN. 345 00:13:54,935 --> 00:13:56,336 - IT'S ON VIBRATE. - YEAH, BUT I CAN TELL 346 00:13:56,369 --> 00:13:58,038 YOU'RE SHAKING YOUR PHONE RIGHT NOW. 347 00:13:58,071 --> 00:14:00,340 - WELL, GUESS WHAT. I HAVE BELL'S PALSY. 348 00:14:00,373 --> 00:14:02,009 - SORRY. - OH, IT'S--IT'S FINE. 349 00:14:02,042 --> 00:14:03,343 GREAT SEEING YOU. BYE, LARRY. 350 00:14:03,376 --> 00:14:04,644 - YEAH, YOU TOO. SEE YOU SOON, HOPEFULLY. 351 00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:07,447 STOP STARING, YOU FAT FUCK. 352 00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:08,882 - I TOTALLY FUCKED HER. 353 00:14:08,916 --> 00:14:11,351 - MOM, THANK YOU. THIS LOOKS AMAZING. 354 00:14:11,384 --> 00:14:13,586 - OH, WHO WANTS TO SAY GRACE? 355 00:14:13,620 --> 00:14:15,488 - OH, UH, HEY, WHY DON'T WE JUST TAKE A BREAK 356 00:14:15,522 --> 00:14:18,191 FROM MUMBLING OVER OUR FOOD BEFORE WE EAT? 357 00:14:18,225 --> 00:14:19,392 WHAT DO YOU THINK, GUYS? 358 00:14:19,426 --> 00:14:21,228 - WHAT IS THIS? YOU'VE GOT AN AUDIENCE? 359 00:14:21,261 --> 00:14:22,529 WHAT, YOU'RE SHOWING OFF? 360 00:14:22,562 --> 00:14:24,932 - YOU KNOW SOMETHING? I GREW UP IN A HOUSE 361 00:14:24,965 --> 00:14:26,633 WHERE WE CLOSED OUR EYES AND MUMBLED ALMOST EVERY MEAL. 362 00:14:26,666 --> 00:14:28,969 I'M--I'M-- I'M GOOD WITH IT. 363 00:14:29,002 --> 00:14:29,970 - COME ON, DAD. 364 00:14:30,003 --> 00:14:32,472 - BLESS US, OH, LORD, FOR THESE, THY GIFTS, 365 00:14:32,505 --> 00:14:34,607 FOR WHICH WE ARE ABOUT TO RECEIVE 366 00:14:34,641 --> 00:14:37,177 FROM THY BOUNTY, THROUGH CHRIST, OUR LORD. 367 00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:38,245 - AMEN. - AMEN. 368 00:14:38,278 --> 00:14:39,379 - PASS THE-- - AND...AND... 369 00:14:39,412 --> 00:14:43,416 DEAR LORD, THANK YOU SO MUCH 370 00:14:43,450 --> 00:14:47,187 FOR BRINGING OUR DAUGHTER FAITH HOME TO US 371 00:14:47,220 --> 00:14:49,389 AND WATCHING OVER HER WHILE SHE'S BEEN OUT WHORING 372 00:14:49,422 --> 00:14:51,491 WITH THE DEVIL'S CHILDREN 373 00:14:51,524 --> 00:14:54,161 AND PROTECTING HER AND KEEPING HER FROM HARM 374 00:14:54,194 --> 00:14:58,431 AND KEEPING HER FROM SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASES. 375 00:14:58,465 --> 00:15:00,100 - OOH. - THROUGH JESUS' NAME WE PRAY. 376 00:15:00,133 --> 00:15:01,568 - AMEN. - AMEN. 377 00:15:01,601 --> 00:15:04,204 - SO...THAT HAPPENED. 378 00:15:04,237 --> 00:15:05,672 - YEAH. 379 00:15:05,705 --> 00:15:07,207 - SO HOW DID YOU TWO MEET? 380 00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:09,042 - OH, IT'S A REALLY FUNNY STORY, ACTUALLY. 381 00:15:09,076 --> 00:15:12,012 - IT'S ACTUALLY THE CUTEST OF MEETS. 382 00:15:12,045 --> 00:15:16,116 I WASN'T FEELING VERY WELL ABOUT MYSELF AT THE TIME, 383 00:15:16,149 --> 00:15:18,218 AND I ENDED UP AT, UM... 384 00:15:18,251 --> 00:15:20,320 - WHAT, A CHURCH? 385 00:15:20,353 --> 00:15:21,654 - IT'S A CHURCH-LIKE PLACE. 386 00:15:21,688 --> 00:15:23,623 I MEAN, THEY TALKED A LOT ABOUT GOD THERE. 387 00:15:23,656 --> 00:15:26,293 - THEY DID. - ANYWAY, THERE SHE WAS. 388 00:15:26,326 --> 00:15:27,427 AND, UH... 389 00:15:27,460 --> 00:15:29,062 - I WAS FEELING PRETTY LOUSY MYSELF. 390 00:15:29,096 --> 00:15:31,531 - YEAH. - OH, FAITH, I'M SO GLAD 391 00:15:31,564 --> 00:15:34,034 YOU'RE STILL TALKING TO HIM. - YEAH, ME TOO. 392 00:15:34,067 --> 00:15:36,036 - OKAY... - SO THIS ONE OVER HERE 393 00:15:36,069 --> 00:15:38,305 WAS PRETTY ANNOYING. - OH, I WAS ANNOYING? 394 00:15:38,338 --> 00:15:40,307 - REALLY, HE WAS-- [laughs] 395 00:15:40,340 --> 00:15:41,741 HE WENT OUT OF HIS WAY, REALLY. 396 00:15:41,774 --> 00:15:44,311 - WE GOT TO TALKING, AND WE ACTUALLY--WE ACTUALLY BONDED 397 00:15:44,344 --> 00:15:46,146 OVER A PAGE OF THE OLD TESTAMENT. 398 00:15:46,179 --> 00:15:48,048 - HOW WONDERFUL. 399 00:15:48,081 --> 00:15:51,051 FAITH CERTAINLY KNOWS HER BIBLE BACKWARDS AND FORWARDS. 400 00:15:51,084 --> 00:15:53,987 - SHE INHALES HER BIBLE. - ALL TRUE. 401 00:15:54,021 --> 00:15:56,056 - SHE MADE ME FEEL A LOT BETTER ABOUT MYSELF AT THE TIME, 402 00:15:56,089 --> 00:15:58,058 AND WE'VE BEEN HANGING OUT EVER SINCE. 403 00:15:58,091 --> 00:16:00,327 - WELL, THAT IS A VERY NICE STORY. 404 00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:03,463 DOES THIS MEAN YOU'RE TURNING OVER A NEW LEAF, SWEETHEART? 405 00:16:03,496 --> 00:16:05,732 - WHAT-- WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? 406 00:16:05,765 --> 00:16:08,201 - WELL, IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU'RE NO LONGER DEGRADING YOURSELF 407 00:16:08,235 --> 00:16:10,703 BY HANGING OUT WITH THOSE PERVERTED MUSICIANS 408 00:16:10,737 --> 00:16:12,339 ALL THE TIME. - OKAY... 409 00:16:12,372 --> 00:16:14,074 - WELL, YOU KNOW, SOME OF THOSE PERVERTED MUSICIANS 410 00:16:14,107 --> 00:16:15,675 HAVE WRITTEN SONGS ABOUT HER. 411 00:16:15,708 --> 00:16:17,744 - WELL, SURE, AFTER SHE SUCKED THEIR FILTHY PENISES. 412 00:16:17,777 --> 00:16:20,213 - ALL RIGHT-- - COME ON, OH... 413 00:16:20,247 --> 00:16:22,115 - MOM, WHY DO YOU JUST ASSUME THAT THEY'RE FILTHY? 414 00:16:22,149 --> 00:16:24,151 AND WHAT'S SO BAD ABOUT A BLOW JOB BETWEEN FRIENDS? 415 00:16:24,184 --> 00:16:26,053 YOU KNOW, MEN LOVE IT WHEN YOU SUCK THEIR DICKS. 416 00:16:26,086 --> 00:16:29,256 IT MAKES THEM SO HAPPY, MOM. - AMEN! 417 00:16:29,289 --> 00:16:30,790 AMEN, HUH? [chuckles] 418 00:16:30,823 --> 00:16:33,226 WHAT? - WATCH YOURSELF. 419 00:16:33,260 --> 00:16:35,762 - HEY, I AGREE WITH MRS. FAITH'S MOM ON THIS ONE. 420 00:16:35,795 --> 00:16:37,730 I-I FIND PENISES UNILATERALLY DISGUSTING. 421 00:16:37,764 --> 00:16:40,500 - CAN WE, UH, TALK ABOUT SOMETHING OTHER THAN PENISES-- 422 00:16:40,533 --> 00:16:43,370 I MEAN, FILTHY OR OTHERWISE? YOU LIKE SPORTS? 423 00:16:43,403 --> 00:16:46,406 - SADLY, I AM NOT--I KNOW YOU'RE GONNA DEDUCT POINTS FOR THAT. 424 00:16:46,439 --> 00:16:50,277 MY APOLOGIES. BUT I'M A HUGE FAN OF YOUR DAUGHTER. 425 00:16:50,310 --> 00:16:51,644 I THINK SHE'S AMAZING. 426 00:16:51,678 --> 00:16:53,646 AND I THINK YOU TWO SHOULD BE VERY PROUD. 427 00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:54,647 - I'LL DRINK TO THAT. 428 00:16:54,681 --> 00:16:56,516 - WE WERE VERY, VERY PROUD 429 00:16:56,549 --> 00:16:59,386 WHEN SHE DEDICATED HER LIFE TO HIM AND-- 430 00:16:59,419 --> 00:17:01,654 - WHO? - HIM. 431 00:17:01,688 --> 00:17:05,592 - OH, HIM. THAT GUY. OF COURSE. OF COURSE. 432 00:17:05,625 --> 00:17:08,461 WHAT--WHAT DID THAT ENTAIL? - CAN WE JUST NOT? 433 00:17:08,495 --> 00:17:12,099 - BUT THEN SHE ABANDONED HIM 434 00:17:12,132 --> 00:17:14,067 AND KIND OF HUMILIATED OUR FAMILY. 435 00:17:14,101 --> 00:17:16,803 - I DON'T REALLY KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I CAN SAY I'M SORRY, MOM. 436 00:17:16,836 --> 00:17:18,805 - GREEN BEANS? - PLEASE. 437 00:17:18,838 --> 00:17:20,373 - HE FORGIVES ALL OF HIS CHILDREN. 438 00:17:20,407 --> 00:17:21,574 - GOOD. GOOD TO KNOW. 439 00:17:21,608 --> 00:17:23,810 - UNFORTUNATELY, I HAVE NOT. 440 00:17:23,843 --> 00:17:25,445 - THERE IT IS. SHOCKER. 441 00:17:25,478 --> 00:17:27,814 - ROLL? - NO. 442 00:17:27,847 --> 00:17:29,216 - IN SPITE OF YOUR LIMITATIONS 443 00:17:29,249 --> 00:17:30,683 AND YOU'RE MEAN-SPIRITED BULLSHIT, 444 00:17:30,717 --> 00:17:32,552 I LOVE YOU--I FORGIVE YOU. - YOU FORGIVE ME? 445 00:17:32,585 --> 00:17:34,087 - GOD DAMN IT! 446 00:17:34,121 --> 00:17:35,555 SHE DIDN'T WANT TO BECOME A FUCKING NUN! 447 00:17:35,588 --> 00:17:37,324 I MEAN, WHAT'S WRONG WITH THAT? 448 00:17:37,357 --> 00:17:38,658 HOW CAN YOU BLAME HER? 449 00:17:38,691 --> 00:17:40,493 WHAT KIND OF LIFE IS THAT FOR SOMEONE? 450 00:17:40,527 --> 00:17:44,197 - EXCUSE ME. 451 00:17:44,231 --> 00:17:47,400 - MARY... [sighs] 452 00:17:47,434 --> 00:17:48,601 - THANKS, DAD. - JESUS. 453 00:17:48,635 --> 00:17:51,104 "THANKS, DAD"? THANKS FOR WHAT? 454 00:17:51,138 --> 00:17:53,873 WHY DO YOU GOT TO GET HER ALL WORKED UP OVER THIS? 455 00:17:53,906 --> 00:17:55,842 YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW THIS IS GONNA HAPPEN. 456 00:17:55,875 --> 00:17:57,777 YOU DON'T COME AND VISIT, AND WHEN YOU DO, 457 00:17:57,810 --> 00:18:01,281 WE--WE ALWAYS END UP TALKING ABOUT THE SAME THING. 458 00:18:01,314 --> 00:18:02,749 WHY CAN'T WE JUST HAVE DINNER 459 00:18:02,782 --> 00:18:06,253 AND TALK ABOUT--I DON'T KNOW-- THE FUCKING WEATHER? 460 00:18:12,192 --> 00:18:16,263 [Faith sighs] 461 00:18:16,296 --> 00:18:18,265 - YOU WERE A NUN? 462 00:18:18,298 --> 00:18:19,732 - KIND OF GROSS, HUH? 463 00:18:19,766 --> 00:18:21,534 - WELL, IT WOULD BE IF YOU WERE ONE OF THOSE 464 00:18:21,568 --> 00:18:23,603 WRINKLY OLD WAR HORSES, BUT YOU'RE NOT. 465 00:18:23,636 --> 00:18:25,605 SO IT'S KIND OF HOT. 466 00:18:25,638 --> 00:18:28,141 - WELL, I KNOW IT WAS A LITTLE EXTREME, 467 00:18:28,175 --> 00:18:32,645 BUT I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR SOMETHING... 468 00:18:32,679 --> 00:18:34,914 BIGGER THAN MYSELF MY WHOLE LIFE. 469 00:18:34,947 --> 00:18:38,151 AND FOR A WHILE, IT WAS REALLY NICE. 470 00:18:38,185 --> 00:18:41,354 BUT I JUST COULDN'T LIVE THAT WAY. 471 00:18:41,388 --> 00:18:42,722 - OH, I UNDERSTAND. 472 00:18:42,755 --> 00:18:47,194 THE NUNNERY'S LOSS IS HUMANITY'S GAIN. 473 00:18:47,227 --> 00:18:50,297 - THE SISTERS CAUGHT ME GETTING OFF ONCE, 474 00:18:50,330 --> 00:18:53,733 WHICH WAS HUGELY, HUGELY EMBARRASSING. 475 00:18:53,766 --> 00:18:55,235 - UH-HUH. - BUT... 476 00:18:55,268 --> 00:18:56,903 - THEY TOLD YOU NOT TO MAKE A HABIT OF IT. 477 00:18:56,936 --> 00:18:58,004 - [laughs] 478 00:18:58,037 --> 00:19:03,543 THE FUNNY THING IS, I'M STILL LOOKING, SEARCHING. 479 00:19:03,576 --> 00:19:05,578 I STILL BELIEVE. 480 00:19:05,612 --> 00:19:07,547 IT'S ALL CONNECTED SOMEHOW, 481 00:19:07,580 --> 00:19:09,516 EVEN SEX AND GOD AND ROCK AND ROLL. 482 00:19:09,549 --> 00:19:13,253 - WELL, BELIEVE IT OR NOT, I HAVE THIS RECURRING DREAM 483 00:19:13,286 --> 00:19:14,454 ABOUT CHURCH AND A NUN. 484 00:19:14,487 --> 00:19:15,755 - REALLY? - YEAH. 485 00:19:15,788 --> 00:19:17,790 - AND WHAT TYPICALLY HAPPENS IN SUCH A DREAM? 486 00:19:17,824 --> 00:19:20,227 - TYPICALLY, I COME IN FILLED WITH ANGST. 487 00:19:20,260 --> 00:19:21,027 - MM-HMM. 488 00:19:21,060 --> 00:19:22,595 - AND I WANT HAVE A CONVERSATION 489 00:19:22,629 --> 00:19:24,531 WITH THE GUY UP ON THE WALL THERE. 490 00:19:24,564 --> 00:19:28,301 AND THEN THIS NUN SHOWS UP. SHE'S VERY PLEASANT... 491 00:19:28,335 --> 00:19:30,703 VERY AGREEABLE. - AND HOW DOES IT END? 492 00:19:30,737 --> 00:19:32,939 - IN A VERY BLASPHEMOUS MANNER. 493 00:19:32,972 --> 00:19:34,441 - HMM. 494 00:19:49,689 --> 00:19:51,291 [zipper opens] 495 00:19:51,324 --> 00:19:52,692 - [sighs] 496 00:19:52,725 --> 00:19:56,229 UH...EYES UP HERE, YOU. 497 00:19:57,630 --> 00:20:01,601 WHO SAYS DREAMS DON'T COME TRUE? 498 00:20:01,634 --> 00:20:04,504 [television droning] 499 00:20:04,537 --> 00:20:07,440 - FAITH? HEY, DO ME A FAVOR. 500 00:20:07,474 --> 00:20:09,609 GO APOLOGIZE TO YOUR MOTHER, WILL YOU? 501 00:20:09,642 --> 00:20:11,944 SHE'S BEEN CRYING AND PRAYING EVER SINCE YOU LEFT. 502 00:20:11,978 --> 00:20:14,314 - COME ON. - PLEASE? 503 00:20:14,347 --> 00:20:15,782 I KNOW SHE'S OUT OF HER FUCKING MIND, 504 00:20:15,815 --> 00:20:17,016 BUT SHE'S STILL YOUR MOTHER. 505 00:20:17,049 --> 00:20:21,588 - ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT. 506 00:20:21,621 --> 00:20:25,224 - HEY, HANK, GRAB A SEAT. 507 00:20:27,694 --> 00:20:30,363 WANT A BEER? - DON'T MIND IF I DO. 508 00:20:30,397 --> 00:20:31,764 - HERE YOU GO. 509 00:20:31,798 --> 00:20:33,733 YOU GOT KIDS? 510 00:20:33,766 --> 00:20:35,635 - YEAH, ONE DAUGHTER, 511 00:20:35,668 --> 00:20:38,305 FROM A PREVIOUS ROMANTIC ENTANGLEMENT. 512 00:20:38,338 --> 00:20:40,440 - OH, YEAH, DAUGHTERS ARE THE FUCKING WORST. 513 00:20:40,473 --> 00:20:42,409 - TELL ME ABOUT IT. 514 00:20:42,442 --> 00:20:44,444 - I GOT TWO. 515 00:20:44,477 --> 00:20:46,746 ONE'S GONNA END UP JUST LIKE HER MOTHER, 516 00:20:46,779 --> 00:20:48,481 AND THE OTHER ONE LOOKING FOR GOD 517 00:20:48,515 --> 00:20:49,749 IN THE BACK OF A TOUR BUS. 518 00:20:49,782 --> 00:20:51,384 - IS THAT REALLY HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT HER? 519 00:20:51,418 --> 00:20:53,620 'CAUSE IF YOU DO, THEN I FEEL SORRY FOR YOU. 520 00:20:53,653 --> 00:20:57,056 - WELL, THEN FEEL SORRY FOR ME. 521 00:20:57,089 --> 00:20:58,991 I DON'T REALLY KNOW HER ANYMORE. 522 00:20:59,025 --> 00:21:00,627 - YOU SHOULD GET TO KNOW HER. 523 00:21:00,660 --> 00:21:01,961 SHE'S PRETTY GREAT. 524 00:21:01,994 --> 00:21:03,330 I THINK YOU'D BE SURPRISED. 525 00:21:03,363 --> 00:21:07,300 - YOU KNOW, I NEVER TOLD HER THIS, 526 00:21:07,334 --> 00:21:10,036 BUT I WAS SO HAPPY WHEN SHE GOT INTO ALL THAT JESUS STUFF. 527 00:21:10,069 --> 00:21:11,704 YOU KNOW, AS A FATHER, YOU-- 528 00:21:11,738 --> 00:21:13,906 YOU KNOW, YOU WORRY ABOUT ALL THOSE DIRTBAGS OUT THERE. 529 00:21:13,940 --> 00:21:15,908 AND I JUST THOUGHT, "WELL, SHE'LL BE SAFE." 530 00:21:15,942 --> 00:21:19,546 - YEAH, THAT'S--THAT'S GENERALLY HOW I FEEL ABOUT MY DAUGHTER. 531 00:21:19,579 --> 00:21:22,682 IN FACT, I-I SECRETLY HOPE THAT SHE'S A LESBIAN. 532 00:21:22,715 --> 00:21:24,083 IT'S NOT VERY SECRET. 533 00:21:24,116 --> 00:21:26,519 I SAY IT EVERY CHANCE I GET, ACTUALLY. 534 00:21:26,553 --> 00:21:28,721 - YOU'RE A WEIRD FUCKING GUY, YOU KNOW THAT? 535 00:21:28,755 --> 00:21:31,424 - PRETTY MUCH, YEAH. 536 00:21:33,926 --> 00:21:37,063 - IF I HAD IT TO DO ALL OVER AGAIN, 537 00:21:37,096 --> 00:21:39,699 I'D ENCOURAGE HER EVERY FUCKING WHIM. 538 00:21:39,732 --> 00:21:42,034 I'D SAY YES INSTEAD OF NO. 539 00:21:42,068 --> 00:21:44,070 I'D LAUGH INSTEAD OF YELL. 540 00:21:44,103 --> 00:21:45,938 THIS HOUSE WAS TOO FUCKING STRICT. 541 00:21:45,972 --> 00:21:48,107 SHE MUST HAVE FELT LIKE A RAT IN A CAGE. 542 00:21:48,140 --> 00:21:52,078 BETWEEN ME AND HER MOTHER, SHE COULDN'T DO ANYTHING RIGHT. 543 00:21:52,111 --> 00:21:55,548 PEOPLE DO STRANGE THINGS WHEN THEY'RE JUDGED ALL THE TIME, 544 00:21:55,582 --> 00:21:58,485 INSTEAD OF JUST BEING LOVED. 545 00:21:58,518 --> 00:22:01,588 CHEERS. 546 00:22:10,597 --> 00:22:12,098 - I'M STILL SHOCKED YOU HAVEN'T TURNED THIS 547 00:22:12,131 --> 00:22:13,966 INTO A SEWING ROOM OR SOMETHING. 548 00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:17,737 - TOO MANY MEMORIES OF THE LITTLE GIRL I USED TO KNOW. 549 00:22:17,770 --> 00:22:19,972 IT'S ALL I HAVE LEFT. 550 00:22:20,006 --> 00:22:21,841 - DON'T BE SO DRAMATIC, PLEASE. 551 00:22:21,874 --> 00:22:26,546 LOOK, I'M SORRY... 552 00:22:26,579 --> 00:22:29,649 - I'M SORRY TOO. 553 00:22:29,682 --> 00:22:31,050 THERE WERE A LOT OF NASTY THINGS 554 00:22:31,083 --> 00:22:33,052 THAT JUST CAME FLYING OUT OF MY MOUTH. 555 00:22:33,085 --> 00:22:34,854 I-I DON'T KNOW WHY I ALWAYS DO THAT. 556 00:22:34,887 --> 00:22:37,490 - OLD HABITS, I GUESS. 557 00:22:37,524 --> 00:22:39,392 - WE WOULD JUST LIKE TO SEE YOU MORE OFTEN. 558 00:22:39,426 --> 00:22:42,529 - OH, CAN YOU JUST BE HAPPY THAT I'M HERE RIGHT NOW? 559 00:22:42,562 --> 00:22:43,730 - I KNOW. I KNOW. 560 00:22:43,763 --> 00:22:45,465 IT'S JUST THAT WE MAY NOT BE AROUND FOREVER, 561 00:22:45,498 --> 00:22:46,766 AND YOUR FATHER REALLY MISSES YOU. 562 00:22:46,799 --> 00:22:48,134 - IS HE OKAY? 563 00:22:48,167 --> 00:22:49,936 - WELL, HE'S A RAGING ALCOHOLIC 564 00:22:49,969 --> 00:22:52,004 ON THE HIGHWAY TO HELL, BUT OTHER THAN THAT, 565 00:22:52,038 --> 00:22:53,573 YEAH, HE'S FINE. 566 00:22:53,606 --> 00:22:58,010 - AND YOU? ARE YOU TRYING TO TELL ME SOMETHING? 567 00:22:58,044 --> 00:23:01,748 - OH, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL CROSS. - THANKS. 568 00:23:01,781 --> 00:23:04,016 IT WAS A PRESENT FROM A REALLY SPECIAL GUY. 569 00:23:04,050 --> 00:23:07,119 - OF COURSE. THERE'S ALWAYS A GUY. 570 00:23:07,153 --> 00:23:09,155 - MMM. - I'M SORRY TO INTERRUPT, 571 00:23:09,188 --> 00:23:13,660 BUT YOUR FATHER STARTED WATCHING SOFT-CORE PORNOGRAPHY AGAIN. 572 00:23:13,693 --> 00:23:14,927 I GOT UNCOMFORTABLE. 573 00:23:14,961 --> 00:23:17,129 - WHAT A POOR, LOST SOUL. OKAY. 574 00:23:17,163 --> 00:23:19,999 WELL, I GUESS YOU TWO ARE--WHOA--TIRED 575 00:23:20,032 --> 00:23:22,068 AND MAYBE A LITTLE DRUNK. 576 00:23:22,101 --> 00:23:24,937 I CAN SMELL IT ON BOTH OF YOU. IT'S KIND OF HIDEOUS. 577 00:23:24,971 --> 00:23:26,673 GOOD NIGHT, HONEY. - GOOD NIGHT. 578 00:23:26,706 --> 00:23:28,908 - OKAY. - GOOD NIGHT. 579 00:23:28,941 --> 00:23:31,210 - OH, NO. YOU ARE GOING TO THE COUCH. 580 00:23:31,243 --> 00:23:32,979 - OH, COME ON. - NO. 581 00:23:33,012 --> 00:23:35,448 DO I SEE A RING ON THAT FINGER? ARE YOU MARRIED? 582 00:23:35,482 --> 00:23:38,851 OTHERWISE, YOU'RE NOT GONNA SLEEP TOGETHER IN THAT BED, 583 00:23:38,885 --> 00:23:40,653 NOT UNDER THIS ROOF. 584 00:23:40,687 --> 00:23:43,089 NO GOOD CAN COME OF THAT. 585 00:23:43,122 --> 00:23:46,192 - [chuckles] [door closes] 586 00:23:46,225 --> 00:23:48,661 [sighs] 587 00:23:50,229 --> 00:23:51,898 - * REACH OUT AND TOUCH FAITH 588 00:23:51,931 --> 00:24:01,073 * 589 00:24:06,245 --> 00:24:08,781 - GREETINGS AND SALUTATIONS, SIRE. 590 00:24:08,815 --> 00:24:11,951 I GUESS IT'S BEEN KIND OF A WHILE, HUH? 591 00:24:11,984 --> 00:24:13,720 BUT YOU'RE LOOKING WELL... 592 00:24:13,753 --> 00:24:17,156 RIPPED AS EVER, I SEE. 593 00:24:17,189 --> 00:24:19,626 SORRY. 594 00:24:19,659 --> 00:24:21,961 - WHATEVER FOR, CHILD? 595 00:24:21,994 --> 00:24:25,832 - WELL, I GUESS I KIND OF WENT OUT FOR A PACK OF SMOKES 596 00:24:25,865 --> 00:24:26,966 AND NEVER CAME BACK. 597 00:24:26,999 --> 00:24:29,736 I LEFT YOU HANGING UP THERE. 598 00:24:29,769 --> 00:24:31,571 - WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU, FAITH? 599 00:24:31,604 --> 00:24:33,606 - I MISS YOU. 600 00:24:33,640 --> 00:24:36,108 I NEED YOU, ESPECIALLY RIGHT NOW. 601 00:24:36,142 --> 00:24:37,844 I'M HAVING WHAT YOU MIGHT CALL 602 00:24:37,877 --> 00:24:40,012 A CRISIS OF FAITH, IF YOU WILL. 603 00:24:40,046 --> 00:24:41,848 - PRAY WITH ME. 604 00:24:41,881 --> 00:24:44,817 - * REACH OUT AND TOUCH FAITH 605 00:24:44,851 --> 00:24:48,788 - UH...FORGIVE ME, FATHER, FOR I HAVE SINNED. 606 00:24:48,821 --> 00:24:50,790 - [laughs] 607 00:24:50,823 --> 00:24:53,626 REALLY? YOU THINK? 608 00:24:53,660 --> 00:24:55,027 [grunts] 609 00:24:57,797 --> 00:25:02,268 - * FEELING'S UNKNOWN, AND YOU'RE ALL ALONE * 610 00:25:02,301 --> 00:25:04,003 - WHOA, JESUS, RELAX. 611 00:25:04,036 --> 00:25:06,272 THERE'S NO NEED TO GET YOUR LOINCLOTH IN A BUNCH UP THERE. 612 00:25:06,305 --> 00:25:08,741 UM... 613 00:25:08,775 --> 00:25:11,010 - [grunts] 614 00:25:12,579 --> 00:25:13,880 TA-DA. 615 00:25:13,913 --> 00:25:18,317 - * I WILL DELIVER, YOU KNOW I'M A FORGIVER * 616 00:25:18,350 --> 00:25:21,888 - I THINK YOU'RE FORGETTING SOMETHING, FAITH. 617 00:25:21,921 --> 00:25:24,023 - * REACH OUT AND TOUCH FAITH 618 00:25:24,056 --> 00:25:27,927 * YOUR OWN PERSONAL JESUS 619 00:25:27,960 --> 00:25:30,096 - JESUS LOVES YOU. 620 00:25:33,132 --> 00:25:34,901 - * REACH OUT AND TOUCH FAITH 621 00:25:34,934 --> 00:25:36,736 - [gasps] 622 00:25:36,769 --> 00:25:38,838 [exhales deeply] 623 00:25:38,871 --> 00:25:41,774 UGH. 624 00:25:41,808 --> 00:25:44,076 [television droning] 625 00:25:47,113 --> 00:25:49,716 [television beeps] 626 00:26:07,834 --> 00:26:13,205 - * SO SHE SAID, "MAN, I GOT TO GET OUT OF THIS TOWN * 627 00:26:13,239 --> 00:26:16,676 * "NOW I GOT TO GET BACK ON THAT TRAIN * 628 00:26:16,709 --> 00:26:19,946 * "MAN, I GOT TO GET OUT OF THIS TOWN * 629 00:26:19,979 --> 00:26:22,348 * "I'M OUT OF MY PAIN 630 00:26:22,381 --> 00:26:26,085 * SO I'M GOING BACK TO L.A." 631 00:26:26,118 --> 00:26:29,956 * 632 00:26:29,989 --> 00:26:33,092 * BACK TO L.A. 633 00:26:33,125 --> 00:26:37,029 * 634 00:26:37,063 --> 00:26:38,264 * BACK TO L.A. 635 00:26:38,297 --> 00:26:39,732 - THIS IS A REAL BUMMER. 636 00:26:39,766 --> 00:26:41,634 I THOUGHT YOU WERE WAKING ME UP TO FUCK ME. 637 00:26:41,668 --> 00:26:43,302 - OH, TRUST ME, I THOUGHT ABOUT IT. 638 00:26:43,335 --> 00:26:45,938 BUT THEN THE URGE TO FLEE WON OUT. 639 00:26:45,972 --> 00:26:48,240 - YOU OKAY? 640 00:26:48,274 --> 00:26:50,977 - "DRIVE," SHE SAID. 641 00:26:51,010 --> 00:26:59,686 - * I'M GOING BACK TO L.A. 642 00:26:59,719 --> 00:27:04,256 * I'M GOING BACK TO L.A. 643 00:27:15,835 --> 00:27:17,403 - HEY. - HELLO. 644 00:27:17,436 --> 00:27:21,140 - I THINK WE SHOULD LET HER GO...ABROAD. 645 00:27:21,173 --> 00:27:22,909 - [whispering] I WAS ALREADY THINKING THAT. 646 00:27:22,942 --> 00:27:24,777 - OF COURSE YOU WERE... 647 00:27:24,811 --> 00:27:26,846 BECAUSE YOU'RE AN EXCEPTIONAL PARENT, 648 00:27:26,879 --> 00:27:29,682 WHICH IS NOT SOMETHING THAT I CAN PUT ON MY RESUME. 649 00:27:29,716 --> 00:27:31,250 I'M TOO BUSY SPOUTING OFF AT THE MOUTH 650 00:27:31,283 --> 00:27:32,785 WITHOUT THINKING. 651 00:27:32,819 --> 00:27:35,421 OUR DAUGHTER WANTS TO GO ON A LITERARY PILGRIMAGE. 652 00:27:35,454 --> 00:27:37,423 WHO THE FUCK DOES THAT IN THIS DAY AND AGE, RIGHT? 653 00:27:37,456 --> 00:27:39,692 AND WHAT KIND OF MALIGNANT FUCKING ASSHOLE 654 00:27:39,726 --> 00:27:41,961 WOULDN'T INDULGE THAT SORT OF BEHAVIOR... 655 00:27:41,994 --> 00:27:43,395 HOWEVER ASININE? 656 00:27:43,429 --> 00:27:44,964 - MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY. 657 00:27:44,997 --> 00:27:49,201 - YOU MEAN WE'RE IN AGREEMENT ON SOMETHING? 658 00:27:49,235 --> 00:27:51,938 - IT LOOKS LIKE IT. 659 00:27:51,971 --> 00:27:53,372 - [shudders] 660 00:27:53,405 --> 00:27:55,307 THAT'S A MINOR FUCKING MIRACLE, ISN'T IT? 661 00:27:55,341 --> 00:27:59,812 - MM-HMM. YOU WANT TO GO IN AND TELL HER YOURSELF? 662 00:27:59,846 --> 00:28:04,450 - YOU COME WITH ME. WE'LL TELL HER TOGETHER. 663 00:28:04,483 --> 00:28:07,820 [Karen speaking indistinctly]