1 00:00:06,974 --> 00:00:09,143 - PREVIOUSLY ON CALIFORNICATION... 2 00:00:09,177 --> 00:00:12,446 - MY EX-WIFE IS LOOKING FOR A NEW NANNY FOR OUR SON. 3 00:00:12,480 --> 00:00:15,616 ANY INTEREST? 4 00:00:15,649 --> 00:00:17,451 - YOU LIKE THAT? - NO, CHARLIE! 5 00:00:17,485 --> 00:00:19,287 - HEY, WE COULD WATCH A MOVIE OR SOMETHING. 6 00:00:19,320 --> 00:00:22,423 - INAPPROPRIATE, CHARLIE. - RIGHT, THAT. 7 00:00:22,456 --> 00:00:23,624 - HOW'S BECCA? 8 00:00:23,657 --> 00:00:25,693 - BOYFRIEND. I WANNA KILL HIM, HANK. 9 00:00:25,726 --> 00:00:28,462 - A YOUNG, GOOD-LOOKING GUY, SWOOPS IN, STARTS SNIFFING 10 00:00:28,496 --> 00:00:30,598 AROUND YOUR ONE-AND-ONLY, AND YOU QUESTION HIS MOTIVES. 11 00:00:30,631 --> 00:00:33,267 BUT I REALLY LIKE YOUR DAUGHTER. 12 00:00:33,301 --> 00:00:34,768 - HE'S YOU. - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 13 00:00:34,802 --> 00:00:36,837 THE KID'S A LOATHSOME, FUCKING ASSHOLE. 14 00:00:36,870 --> 00:00:39,340 - I'D LIKE TO INTRODUCE YOU TO RICHARD BATES. 15 00:00:39,373 --> 00:00:40,541 - HAVEN'T TOUCHED THE STUFF SINCE SLICK WILLIE 16 00:00:40,574 --> 00:00:42,210 WAS IN THE WHITE HOUSE. 17 00:00:42,243 --> 00:00:43,811 - [whispers] RICHARD. - BABY. COME ON UP, HONEY! 18 00:00:43,844 --> 00:00:45,479 - [whispers] STOP IT. 19 00:00:45,513 --> 00:00:46,714 TYLER SWITCHED DRINKS, THOUGHT IT'D BE FUNNY 20 00:00:46,747 --> 00:00:48,149 TO WATCH HIM GET DRUNK. 21 00:00:48,182 --> 00:00:50,151 - JESUS, THAT KID REALLY IS A YOUNG ME. 22 00:00:50,184 --> 00:00:51,685 [laughing] WANT ME TO GO AFTER HIM? 23 00:00:51,719 --> 00:00:53,554 - NO, I DON'T. JUST LET HIM RUN IT OFF. 24 00:00:53,587 --> 00:00:55,556 HEY, CAN I COME IN? 25 00:00:55,589 --> 00:00:57,858 IT'S RICHARD, YOU KNOW, HE WON'T STOP DRINKING. 26 00:00:57,891 --> 00:01:00,361 I THINK I MADE A TERRIBLE MISTAKE, YOU KNOW? 27 00:01:17,178 --> 00:01:19,247 - [sighs] 28 00:01:30,858 --> 00:01:31,859 - [snorts] 29 00:01:31,892 --> 00:01:33,427 OH, FUCK! 30 00:01:33,461 --> 00:01:35,296 - [chuckles] 31 00:01:35,329 --> 00:01:36,564 - OH, FUCK, PLEASE TELL ME WE DIDN'T. 32 00:01:36,597 --> 00:01:38,199 - I CAN'T TELL YOU THAT. 33 00:01:38,232 --> 00:01:39,633 - OH, MY GOD. - I-I-I WON'T TELL YOU THAT. 34 00:01:39,667 --> 00:01:40,901 Y-Y-YOU DON'T REMEMBER? - NO. 35 00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:42,636 - ANYTHING? - NO. 36 00:01:42,670 --> 00:01:43,871 - OF COURSE WE DID. 37 00:01:43,904 --> 00:01:45,273 IT WAS PRETTY EPIC STUFF, TOO. 38 00:01:45,306 --> 00:01:47,275 IT WAS LIKE A GODDAMN SEX OPERA. 39 00:01:47,308 --> 00:01:50,778 YOUR ARIA WAS BEAUTIFUL, BY THE WAY. 40 00:01:50,811 --> 00:01:53,147 - OH, MY GOD, THIS IS SO FUCKED UP. 41 00:01:53,181 --> 00:01:55,816 - YEAH...AND NOT EVEN REMOTELY TRUE. 42 00:01:55,849 --> 00:01:57,551 - REALLY? - GIMME A BREAK, LADY. 43 00:01:57,585 --> 00:01:59,420 I DIDN'T EVEN LAY A HAND ON YOU. 44 00:01:59,453 --> 00:02:01,755 DO YOU REALLY THINK I'D TAKE ADVANTAGE OF A MARRIED WOMAN 45 00:02:01,789 --> 00:02:04,258 IN SUCH A SORRY STATE? 46 00:02:04,292 --> 00:02:05,859 THAT'S NOT VERY NICE. 47 00:02:05,893 --> 00:02:09,297 - OH, GOD, ALL I REMEMBER IS, LIKE... 48 00:02:09,330 --> 00:02:10,698 HAVING A COUPLE OF DRINKS AND THEN-- 49 00:02:10,731 --> 00:02:12,666 - WHICH, FOR YOU, IS LIKE THE EQUIVALENT 50 00:02:12,700 --> 00:02:14,902 OF GETTING TOTALLY BLOTTO. 51 00:02:14,935 --> 00:02:18,306 - I KNOW-- [pounding on door] 52 00:02:18,339 --> 00:02:19,573 NO-- - COME ON. 53 00:02:19,607 --> 00:02:21,742 GIVE ME A LITTLE TONGUE FOR BEING GOOD! 54 00:02:21,775 --> 00:02:23,544 - THANK YOU, THANK YOU FOR NOT TAKING ADVANTAGE 55 00:02:23,577 --> 00:02:27,448 OF ME WHEN I'M SURE YOU TOTALLY COULD HAVE. 56 00:02:27,481 --> 00:02:29,850 - NOW YOU TELL ME. 57 00:02:31,452 --> 00:02:34,288 WHOA. BATESY? 58 00:02:34,322 --> 00:02:36,590 - [coughs] - WHAT THE FUCK, DUDE? 59 00:02:36,624 --> 00:02:40,828 - HANK. 60 00:02:40,861 --> 00:02:43,631 - TALK TO ME, BUDDY. USE YOUR WORDS. 61 00:02:43,664 --> 00:02:45,299 [whispers] QUIETLY. 62 00:02:45,333 --> 00:02:47,601 - HANK, I WOKE UP IN A STRANGE WOMAN'S BED. 63 00:02:47,635 --> 00:02:49,270 - OH. 64 00:02:49,303 --> 00:02:52,240 - I MEAN, SHE WAS NAKED, HANK. 65 00:02:52,273 --> 00:02:53,874 INCREDIBLY NAKED. 66 00:02:53,907 --> 00:02:57,378 - I GOT IT. 67 00:02:57,411 --> 00:02:59,313 - I CAN'T FIND MY WEDDING RING. I'M FUCKED! 68 00:02:59,347 --> 00:03:01,215 - [whispers] SHH! INSIDE VOICE. 69 00:03:01,249 --> 00:03:05,286 - [crying] I CAN'T GO HOME AND FACE KAREN LIKE THIS. 70 00:03:05,319 --> 00:03:08,456 - BEEN THERE. - [cries] 71 00:03:08,489 --> 00:03:10,291 - WHY DON'T WE DO THIS? 72 00:03:12,626 --> 00:03:14,995 - HEY, BATESY. BATESY, STAY. 73 00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:18,532 STAY. 74 00:03:20,901 --> 00:03:23,537 - [whispering] HEY, DID I HEAR SOMEONE CRYING? 75 00:03:23,571 --> 00:03:24,905 - OH, YEAH, THAT'S JUST CHARLIE. 76 00:03:24,938 --> 00:03:26,274 - OH, MY GOD-- - NO, HE'S FINE. 77 00:03:26,307 --> 00:03:27,541 HE CRIES A LOT, WOULDN'T YOU? 78 00:03:27,575 --> 00:03:29,577 - LET'S GO TO SEE-- - [chuckles] 79 00:03:29,610 --> 00:03:30,844 - YOU WANNA GO GRAB SOME BREAKFAST? 80 00:03:30,878 --> 00:03:32,580 - UH, NO. N-N-NO. NOT HUNGRY. 81 00:03:32,613 --> 00:03:33,914 - NO? - TUMMY TROUBLES, ACTUALLY. 82 00:03:33,947 --> 00:03:36,317 TOO MUCH BOOZE AND MARITAL WOE. 83 00:03:36,350 --> 00:03:38,286 YEAH, IT WAS LIKE WATCHING A VERY SPECIAL EPISODE 84 00:03:38,319 --> 00:03:39,687 OF REAL HOUSEWIVES OF SOMEWHERE LAME. 85 00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:41,289 - I-- - YEAH... 86 00:03:41,322 --> 00:03:42,523 I THINK YOU SHOULD GO, KAREN. 87 00:03:42,556 --> 00:03:43,524 I THINK YOU GOTTA GO. 88 00:03:43,557 --> 00:03:45,293 WHAT? WHA-- 89 00:03:45,326 --> 00:03:47,761 - NO. I-I JUST KIND OF FIGURED YOU'D WANNA HANG OUT 90 00:03:47,795 --> 00:03:49,563 FOR A WHILE-- - OH, ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. 91 00:03:49,597 --> 00:03:52,266 SO I'M LIKE SOME LOVELORN PUPPY, YOU THROW ME A BONE, 92 00:03:52,300 --> 00:03:54,568 I'M SUPPOSED TO ROLL OVER, LICK MY BALLS, AND FETCH? 93 00:03:54,602 --> 00:03:55,703 IS THAT IT? 94 00:03:55,736 --> 00:03:57,338 WELL, MAYBE NEXT TIME, KAREN. 95 00:03:57,371 --> 00:03:59,006 PEACE BE WITH YOU. 96 00:04:04,011 --> 00:04:05,713 OFF YOU GO. 97 00:04:09,783 --> 00:04:11,519 BATESY! 98 00:04:11,552 --> 00:04:16,023 - [snoring] 99 00:04:16,056 --> 00:04:19,026 [upbeat music] 100 00:04:19,059 --> 00:04:27,000 * 101 00:04:59,066 --> 00:05:02,035 [rock music] 102 00:05:02,069 --> 00:05:03,471 * 103 00:05:03,504 --> 00:05:04,705 - PRETTY GRIM, BATESY. 104 00:05:04,738 --> 00:05:06,440 HOW THE FUCK DID YOU END UP HERE? 105 00:05:06,474 --> 00:05:08,075 - AH, I JUST REMEMBER DRINKING MYSELF BLIND, 106 00:05:08,108 --> 00:05:10,544 GETTING INTO A CAB. 107 00:05:10,578 --> 00:05:14,047 TOLD THE GUY TO TAKE ME TO A FUCKING STRIP CLUB, 108 00:05:14,081 --> 00:05:17,084 AND AFTER THAT, IT'S JUST A BLUR OF TITTIES AND BEER. 109 00:05:17,117 --> 00:05:19,487 - [chuckles] - [groans] 110 00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:21,389 OH, SHIT. THIS WAY. 111 00:05:26,093 --> 00:05:27,895 OH, GOD. OH, GOD. 112 00:05:27,928 --> 00:05:29,062 - HELLO? 113 00:05:29,096 --> 00:05:32,500 OH, HEY. HEY! 114 00:05:32,533 --> 00:05:34,868 - BATES! [laughs] 115 00:05:34,902 --> 00:05:38,138 YOU SNUCK OUT ON ME, YOU TRICKY LITTLE DICKY, YOU! 116 00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:39,540 - [whispers] SHE KNOWS MY NAME, HANK. 117 00:05:39,573 --> 00:05:40,874 - [mutters] YES, INDEED, SHE DOES... 118 00:05:40,908 --> 00:05:44,478 AND SHE APPEARS TO HAVE YOUR WEDDING RING, TOO. 119 00:05:44,512 --> 00:05:46,013 - YOU KNOW, I'M GOING TO BE, UH, SICK. 120 00:05:46,046 --> 00:05:47,415 UH, MAY I-- [chokes] 121 00:05:47,448 --> 00:05:48,582 - OH, YOU KNOW WHERE THE BATHROOM IS. 122 00:05:48,616 --> 00:05:49,983 DOWN THE HALL AND TO THE LEFT. 123 00:05:50,017 --> 00:05:51,885 THAT'S WHERE I SHOT YOU UP LAST NIGHT! 124 00:05:51,919 --> 00:05:56,624 [laughs] I'M JUST KIDDING. 125 00:05:56,657 --> 00:05:58,459 - HANK. - OH, HOLLY. 126 00:05:58,492 --> 00:06:00,093 - HOLLY. OKAY. SO, UH... 127 00:06:00,127 --> 00:06:03,030 WHAT'S IT GONNA TAKE IF THE MAN NEEDS HIS WEDDING RING BACK? 128 00:06:03,063 --> 00:06:05,132 - OH, WELL, I MEAN, I UNDERSTAND, 129 00:06:05,165 --> 00:06:08,469 AND I'M TOTALLY SYMPATHETIC, BUT HE DID PAY ME WITH IT. 130 00:06:08,502 --> 00:06:10,604 THE GUY WENT TO TOWN IN THE VIP ROOM. 131 00:06:10,638 --> 00:06:12,773 DANCE AFTER DANCE AFTER DANCE. 132 00:06:12,806 --> 00:06:16,944 I SHOOK MY MONEYMAKER TO AN ENTIRE ALBUM FOR HIM. 133 00:06:16,977 --> 00:06:18,546 GUNS N' ROSES. APPETITE. 134 00:06:18,579 --> 00:06:20,414 - GREAT ALBUM, GREAT ALBUM. - THE BEST. 135 00:06:20,448 --> 00:06:23,784 LOST MY CHERRY TO IT. FRONT AND BACK. 136 00:06:23,817 --> 00:06:26,019 - HMM. 137 00:06:26,053 --> 00:06:28,689 [coughs] HOW MUCH... IS IT GONNA-- 138 00:06:28,722 --> 00:06:30,891 [Bates retches] - [sighs] 139 00:06:30,924 --> 00:06:32,960 [Bates continues retching] 140 00:06:32,993 --> 00:06:35,663 - COME ON. 141 00:06:35,696 --> 00:06:38,165 THESE ARE 20s. - I KNOW. COME ON. 142 00:06:38,198 --> 00:06:40,901 OKAY. THAT'S IT. 143 00:06:40,934 --> 00:06:42,870 NOT A DOLLAR MORE. THAT'S WHAT I'M OWED. 144 00:06:42,903 --> 00:06:44,472 MM-HMM. 145 00:06:44,505 --> 00:06:45,839 - CAN I ASK YOU A QUESTION? 146 00:06:45,873 --> 00:06:47,007 - SURE THING, HANK. 147 00:06:47,040 --> 00:06:48,909 - DID YOU GUYS, UH, YOU KNOW-- 148 00:06:48,942 --> 00:06:50,511 - FUCK? - YEAH. 149 00:06:50,544 --> 00:06:52,546 - [chuckles] WHAT DO YOU THINK, I'M A SLUT? 150 00:06:52,580 --> 00:06:56,450 YOU THINK JUST BECAUSE I DANCE NAKED FOR MONEY, 151 00:06:56,484 --> 00:06:57,551 THAT I'M AN EASY LAY? - NO. 152 00:06:57,585 --> 00:06:58,886 - [laughs] OH, REALLY? 153 00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:00,588 WELL, NO, ACTUALLY. 154 00:07:00,621 --> 00:07:03,757 WE CAME BACK HERE, WE BREWED SOME MINT TEA, 155 00:07:03,791 --> 00:07:05,826 CURLED UP ON THE SOFA, 156 00:07:05,859 --> 00:07:08,462 AND WATCHED SOME BRITISH TELEVISION. 157 00:07:08,496 --> 00:07:10,498 RETURN TO CRANFORD. HAVE YOU SEEN IT? 158 00:07:10,531 --> 00:07:12,700 OH, IT'S A REAL TREAT. - HMM. 159 00:07:12,733 --> 00:07:15,202 - OF COURSE WE FUCKED! THE GUY'S AN ANIMAL. 160 00:07:15,235 --> 00:07:16,637 [laughs] 161 00:07:16,670 --> 00:07:18,105 COME ON. - [chuckles] 162 00:07:18,138 --> 00:07:19,673 DID HE WEAR A RUBBER? 163 00:07:19,707 --> 00:07:21,642 - OH, NO GLOVE, NO LOVE. THAT'S MY POLICY. 164 00:07:21,675 --> 00:07:24,011 - THAT'S A SOLID POLICY. 165 00:07:27,047 --> 00:07:28,015 [knocks on door] 166 00:07:33,086 --> 00:07:34,922 - HI, CHARLIE. - HI, LIZZIE. 167 00:07:34,955 --> 00:07:36,490 - CAN I COME IN? 168 00:07:36,524 --> 00:07:38,959 - OOH, DO YOU THINK IT'S APPROPRIATE? 169 00:07:38,992 --> 00:07:40,127 - IN THIS CASE, YES. 170 00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:42,062 I JUST WANTED TO SAY GOOD-BYE. 171 00:07:42,095 --> 00:07:43,263 - GOOD-BYE? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 172 00:07:43,296 --> 00:07:45,198 YOU JUST SAID HELLO. 173 00:07:45,232 --> 00:07:48,602 - MARCY LET ME GO. 174 00:07:48,636 --> 00:07:49,703 - REALLY? 175 00:07:49,737 --> 00:07:53,173 AS IN, FIRED YOU? WHY? 176 00:07:53,206 --> 00:07:57,578 - WELL, IT'S A LONG STORY, BUT... 177 00:07:57,611 --> 00:07:58,912 BASICALLY, SHE THINKS I WAS TRYING 178 00:07:58,946 --> 00:08:02,049 TO SEDUCE HER HUSBAND. - WERE YOU? 179 00:08:02,082 --> 00:08:04,251 - STU'S NOT EXACTLY MY TYPE, CHARLIE. 180 00:08:04,284 --> 00:08:07,921 - HE HAS A VERY BIG PENIS. SERIOUSLY. 181 00:08:07,955 --> 00:08:10,658 IT'S LIKE A PILE OF SNAKES WITH AN APPLE ON TOP. 182 00:08:10,691 --> 00:08:12,626 - THAT'S DISGUSTING, CHARLIE. 183 00:08:12,660 --> 00:08:17,631 - VERY. SO, WHAT HAPPENED? 184 00:08:17,665 --> 00:08:20,300 - WELL, STUART WAS TAKING A NAP, AND IT WAS SO HOT IN THE HILLS. 185 00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:22,035 I THOUGHT I'D GO FOR A SWIM. 186 00:08:22,069 --> 00:08:25,305 THEY'RE ALWAYS ENCOURAGING ME TO USE THEIR POOL. 187 00:08:25,338 --> 00:08:28,008 I DIDN'T HAVE A BATHING SUIT. 188 00:08:28,041 --> 00:08:29,977 - CONTINUE...PLEASE. 189 00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:33,781 - BUT NO ONE WAS HOME. 190 00:08:52,933 --> 00:08:54,702 [gasps] MR. BEGGS, I AM SO SORRY! 191 00:08:54,735 --> 00:08:56,336 STUART'S ASLEEP, AND I THOUGHT I WAS HERE ALONE. 192 00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:59,306 - NO APOLOGIES, DEAR. 193 00:08:59,339 --> 00:09:01,609 YOU HAVE A MAGNIFICENT BODY. 194 00:09:03,143 --> 00:09:06,980 AND CALL ME STU. 195 00:09:07,014 --> 00:09:10,584 - SO, YOU WERE NAKED. - COMPLETELY. 196 00:09:10,618 --> 00:09:13,086 AND I THINK HE MUST'VE SAID SOMETHING TO MARCY, 197 00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:15,122 AND SHE THOUGHT IT WAS INAPPROPRIATE. 198 00:09:15,155 --> 00:09:16,924 AND THEN SUDDENLY, SHE STARTED SCREAMING, 199 00:09:16,957 --> 00:09:20,160 AND I WAS FIRED. CHARLIE? 200 00:09:23,897 --> 00:09:25,666 - YOU LET ME SEE WHAT I CAN DO. 201 00:09:25,699 --> 00:09:27,167 I'LL--I'LL GO TALK TO THEM. 202 00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:29,970 - [sighs] THANK YOU, CHARLIE, YOU'RE A DREAM. 203 00:09:30,003 --> 00:09:34,975 - NOW, JUST SO I'M CLEAR, YOU WERE TOTALLY NAKED? 204 00:09:35,008 --> 00:09:36,376 - YES, CHARLIE. - OKAY. 205 00:09:36,409 --> 00:09:38,646 GOOD. GOT IT. 206 00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:41,649 - YEAH. UM, DO YOU MIND TERRIBLY IF I USE YOUR SHOWER? 207 00:09:41,682 --> 00:09:44,184 IT'S JUST--I FEEL SO DIRTY AND DISGUSTING AFTER ALL THIS. 208 00:09:44,217 --> 00:09:48,355 - NO PROBLEM AT ALL! BE MY GUEST. 209 00:09:50,924 --> 00:09:52,325 UM-- - YES. 210 00:09:52,359 --> 00:09:54,695 I'LL BE TOTALLY NAKED IN YOUR SHOWER CHARLIE. 211 00:09:54,728 --> 00:09:55,963 - EXCELLENT! 212 00:10:01,234 --> 00:10:03,303 - FUCK IT, I GOTTA KNOW. DID SHE SAY WHAT HAPPENED? 213 00:10:03,336 --> 00:10:04,838 - WHO? 214 00:10:04,872 --> 00:10:06,907 - THE STRIPPER, GODDAMN IT! - AH, YEAH. 215 00:10:06,940 --> 00:10:08,709 RIGHT, THE STRIPPER. YOU REALLY WANNA KNOW? 216 00:10:08,742 --> 00:10:11,745 - NO! BUT I GOTTA KNOW WHAT I'M DEALING WITH HERE. 217 00:10:11,779 --> 00:10:14,347 LIKE, IF I CHEATED ON THIS WOMAN, THIS... 218 00:10:14,381 --> 00:10:17,417 INCREDIBLE FUCKING GODDESS OF A WOMAN, MY QUEEN-- 219 00:10:17,450 --> 00:10:20,220 - [sighs] - I GOTTA COME CLEAN, HANK. 220 00:10:20,253 --> 00:10:22,222 SHE'S BEEN THROUGH TOO MUCH. 221 00:10:22,255 --> 00:10:23,657 NO OFFENSE. 222 00:10:23,691 --> 00:10:27,127 - SOME TAKEN. 223 00:10:27,160 --> 00:10:30,931 ALL RIGHT, WELL THIS IS WHAT SHE TOLD ME. 224 00:10:30,964 --> 00:10:33,901 SHE SAID SHE BROUGHT YOU HOME, AND SHE WAS DOWN FOR ANYTHING. 225 00:10:33,934 --> 00:10:36,136 AND YOU WERE TEMPTED, BUT YOU FOUGHT HER OFF. 226 00:10:36,169 --> 00:10:37,337 - [sighs] 227 00:10:37,370 --> 00:10:38,338 - SAID YOU WERE IN LOVE WITH YOUR WIFE. 228 00:10:38,371 --> 00:10:39,439 YOU COULDN'T DO IT. 229 00:10:39,472 --> 00:10:41,975 YOU COULDN'T EVEN GET IT UP! 230 00:10:42,009 --> 00:10:44,344 - JESUS. 231 00:10:44,377 --> 00:10:46,346 I'M RELIEVED, BUT ASHAMED. 232 00:10:46,379 --> 00:10:47,815 THE DRINKING DOES THAT TO A MAN. 233 00:10:47,848 --> 00:10:50,083 - WELL, IT HAPPENS TO THE BEST OF US. 234 00:10:50,117 --> 00:10:51,952 - [sighs] JESUS. - NOT REALLY. 235 00:10:51,985 --> 00:10:53,721 - I'M SO RELIEVED. 236 00:10:53,754 --> 00:10:57,991 THANK YOU. 237 00:10:58,025 --> 00:11:00,761 - WHY? WHY? - EX-EXACTLY! 238 00:11:00,794 --> 00:11:02,730 - YEAH, WHY? - WHY? YOU TELL ME WHY. 239 00:11:02,763 --> 00:11:06,033 WHY MUST TWO MEN BE CONFINED TO HANDSHAKES AND HUGS? 240 00:11:06,066 --> 00:11:07,901 WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THAT'S NOT ENOUGH? 241 00:11:07,935 --> 00:11:09,236 - YOU COME OUT OF THE CLOSET! 242 00:11:09,269 --> 00:11:11,204 WHAT? 243 00:11:11,238 --> 00:11:13,440 - FOR SUCH A FINE MAN, YOU'RE SO DAMN LIMITED. 244 00:11:13,473 --> 00:11:15,743 - IT'S A BURDEN, BUT I COPE. - [sighs] 245 00:11:15,776 --> 00:11:17,444 - HOW 'BOUT A BREATH MINT, DUDE? 246 00:11:17,477 --> 00:11:18,712 YOU KNOW, YOU BEEN THROWING UP ALL MORNING. 247 00:11:18,746 --> 00:11:21,715 - YEAH, WHAT'S YOUR EXCUSE? 248 00:11:21,749 --> 00:11:23,951 - SO YOU JUST FIRE HER JUST LIKE THAT? 249 00:11:23,984 --> 00:11:26,186 NO SECOND CHANCE, NO-- 250 00:11:26,219 --> 00:11:28,188 - YEAH, WELL, SHE'S A DIRTY LITTLE SLUT! 251 00:11:28,221 --> 00:11:30,157 - HEY! LIZZIE IS MANY THINGS. 252 00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:32,425 "DIRTY LITTLE SLUT" CERTAINLY ISN'T ONE OF THEM. 253 00:11:32,459 --> 00:11:35,428 - WHO SWIMS NAKED IN A POOL WHEN THE MAN OF THE HOUSE IS HOME? 254 00:11:35,462 --> 00:11:37,264 - SHE WAS HOT! 255 00:11:37,297 --> 00:11:39,066 SHE THOUGHT SHE WAS ALONE! 256 00:11:39,099 --> 00:11:40,901 - WHY ARE YOU DEFENDING HER SO MUCH? 257 00:11:40,934 --> 00:11:42,936 - BECAUSE SHE'S GREAT WITH OUR SON! 258 00:11:42,970 --> 00:11:45,205 [baby crying] - YO! I'M DONE. 259 00:11:45,238 --> 00:11:48,208 DID MY BEST. YOU'RE UP, MARCY. 260 00:11:48,241 --> 00:11:51,178 - I FUCKING HATE NOT HAVING A NANNY! 261 00:11:54,848 --> 00:11:57,217 - WHAT ABOUT YOU, BIG-TIME MOVIE PRODUCER? 262 00:11:57,250 --> 00:11:59,186 YOU HAVE NO SAY IN THIS? 263 00:11:59,219 --> 00:12:04,157 - CHARLIE, I'VE PRODUCED MOVIES. BIG, SMALL. 264 00:12:04,191 --> 00:12:07,060 I'VE RUN TWO STUDIOS. I HAVE MANAGED THE EGOS 265 00:12:07,094 --> 00:12:09,863 OF SOME OF THE GREATEST MOVIE STARS IN THE WORLD, 266 00:12:09,897 --> 00:12:12,365 BUT I CANNOT BOSS THIS WOMAN AROUND. 267 00:12:12,399 --> 00:12:13,767 SHE RULES THE ROOST. 268 00:12:13,801 --> 00:12:15,468 - WHICH IS JUST A FANCY WAY OF SAYING 269 00:12:15,502 --> 00:12:17,370 YOU'RE FUCKING PUSSY-WHIPPED. 270 00:12:17,404 --> 00:12:20,240 - PRECISELY. 271 00:12:20,273 --> 00:12:23,076 BESIDES, THERE WAS SOMETHING WEIRD ABOUT IT. 272 00:12:23,110 --> 00:12:24,177 - WHAT? 273 00:12:24,211 --> 00:12:26,346 - THE THING WITH LIZZIE. 274 00:12:26,379 --> 00:12:27,414 - WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 275 00:12:27,447 --> 00:12:31,384 - I MEAN, THERE WAS A STRANGE VIBE. 276 00:12:31,418 --> 00:12:34,354 [whistling] 277 00:12:39,292 --> 00:12:42,229 [choir singing] 278 00:12:52,840 --> 00:12:54,842 - I'M SO SORRY, MR. BEGGS. 279 00:12:54,875 --> 00:12:56,844 STUART'S ASLEEP. I THOUGHT THAT NO ONE WAS HOME. 280 00:12:56,877 --> 00:13:00,213 - NO NEED TO APOLOGIZE, AND CALL ME STU! 281 00:13:00,247 --> 00:13:02,816 [giggles] 282 00:13:02,850 --> 00:13:04,251 YOU HAVE A MAGNIFICENT BODY! 283 00:13:04,284 --> 00:13:05,318 - THANK YOU! 284 00:13:05,352 --> 00:13:07,955 DO YOU THINK I HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO BE AN ACTRESS? 285 00:13:07,988 --> 00:13:10,590 - YES. 286 00:13:10,623 --> 00:13:14,227 - I DON'T SEE LIZZIE AS THE KIND OF GIRL TO JUST... 287 00:13:14,261 --> 00:13:17,264 THROW HERSELF AT SOME CREEPY OLD MARRIED GUY. 288 00:13:17,297 --> 00:13:21,268 - RUNKLE... 289 00:13:21,301 --> 00:13:23,937 I KNOW I AM NOT A HANDSOME MAN, 290 00:13:23,971 --> 00:13:26,073 BUT I AM A VERY SUCCESSFUL MAN. 291 00:13:26,106 --> 00:13:28,842 I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE HIT ON BY PRETTY YOUNG THINGS 292 00:13:28,876 --> 00:13:30,577 WHO WANT SOMETHING FROM ME. 293 00:13:30,610 --> 00:13:35,248 - MUST BE NICE. WISH I DID. 294 00:13:39,419 --> 00:13:44,424 - WHEW! DO NOT GO IN THERE FOR AT LEAST 24 HOURS. 295 00:13:44,457 --> 00:13:45,625 - OKAY. 296 00:13:45,658 --> 00:13:47,127 - HEY, LOOK AT THAT. THAT'S NEAT. 297 00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:48,128 - THANK YOU. - CAN I PLAY WITH IT? 298 00:13:48,161 --> 00:13:48,962 - NO! PLEASE DON'T TOUCH-- 299 00:13:48,996 --> 00:13:49,829 - DO YOU HAVE MATCHBOX CARS? - NO! 300 00:13:49,863 --> 00:13:52,399 I HAVE A PITCH TO A CLIENT TOMORROW. 301 00:13:52,432 --> 00:13:54,301 - HOW'S BATESY? 302 00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:57,437 - HE'S ASLEEP, YOU KNOW, SLEEPING IT OFF UPSTAIRS. 303 00:13:57,470 --> 00:13:59,072 - HOW ARE YOU? 304 00:13:59,106 --> 00:14:00,340 [sighs] - WELL, WHAT CAN I DO? 305 00:14:00,373 --> 00:14:02,275 I MEAN, HE'S GOING THROUGH A CRISIS, YOU KNOW? 306 00:14:02,309 --> 00:14:05,212 IF I--IF I THROW HIM OUT, IF I LEAVE, 307 00:14:05,245 --> 00:14:06,980 THEN IT'S JUST GONNA GET WORSE, RIGHT? 308 00:14:07,014 --> 00:14:09,582 - SO THAT'S IT? YOU'RE JUST GONNA STAND BY YOUR MAN? 309 00:14:09,616 --> 00:14:13,386 - THAT'S WHAT I DO. 310 00:14:13,420 --> 00:14:15,622 THANKS FOR BRINGING HIM HOME, BY THE WAY. 311 00:14:15,655 --> 00:14:16,856 - IT'S MY PLEASURE, 312 00:14:16,890 --> 00:14:20,060 AND I--AND I WANNA APOLOGIZE FOR THAT WEIRDNESS THIS MORNING. 313 00:14:20,093 --> 00:14:23,496 YOU KNOW I LOVE SPENDING ANY AMOUNT OF TIME WITH YOU, 314 00:14:23,530 --> 00:14:26,366 HOWEVER CHASTE. [doorbell rings] 315 00:14:26,399 --> 00:14:28,335 - COULD YOU GET IT? IT'S PROBABLY JUST TYLER. 316 00:14:28,368 --> 00:14:30,270 - [sarcastically] OH, FABULOUS. 317 00:14:30,303 --> 00:14:33,106 - STOP IT. C-COULD YOU SAY SORRY? 318 00:14:33,140 --> 00:14:35,976 - I DID! - NO, AGAIN, LIKE YOU MEAN IT. 319 00:14:39,412 --> 00:14:42,182 - OH! - WHAT THE FUCK, STRIPPER? 320 00:14:42,215 --> 00:14:43,650 - I FOUND THIS ON THE BEDROOM FLOOR, 321 00:14:43,683 --> 00:14:45,285 AND I THOUGHT THAT MAYBE HE'D WANT IT BACK! 322 00:14:45,318 --> 00:14:47,120 - HAVE YOU NO SHAME? HE'S A MARRIED MAN! 323 00:14:47,154 --> 00:14:49,122 - OH, SO WHAT? I DIDN'T COME HERE TO TELL HIS WIFE 324 00:14:49,156 --> 00:14:50,290 THAT HE BANGS STRIPPERS ON THE SIDE. 325 00:14:50,323 --> 00:14:51,624 - HE DOESN'T BANG STRIPPERS ON THE SIDE. 326 00:14:51,658 --> 00:14:53,393 HE'S GOT A DRINKING PROBLEM IS ALL--A LITTLE ONE. 327 00:14:53,426 --> 00:14:55,963 - OH, I'LL SAY. GUY'S A FUCKIN' LUNATIC. 328 00:14:55,996 --> 00:14:57,030 HE WANTED ME TO SHOVE A DILDO UP HIS ASS 329 00:14:57,064 --> 00:14:58,065 AND JERK HIM OFF AT THE SAME TIME. 330 00:14:58,098 --> 00:14:58,966 - OH! COME ON! 331 00:14:58,999 --> 00:15:00,600 - WHAT IS THAT CALLED AGAIN? - PAINFUL? 332 00:15:00,633 --> 00:15:02,402 - NO, THE DIGGING TO CHINA? - AGAINST GOD? 333 00:15:02,435 --> 00:15:03,470 - THE FI--TH-TH-THE FIRE HOSE. 334 00:15:03,503 --> 00:15:06,039 N-N-N-NO. THE BAZOOKA. - WOW. 335 00:15:06,073 --> 00:15:07,407 - NO, NO, NO, THE SHOTGUN. THAT'S WHAT-- 336 00:15:07,440 --> 00:15:09,076 [imitates shotgun] - OKAY. YEAH, OKAY, OKAY. 337 00:15:09,109 --> 00:15:10,010 - OH, GOD. I'M SORRY. 338 00:15:10,043 --> 00:15:12,079 I GOT SO MUCH CRAZY SHIT GOIN' ON UP HERE. 339 00:15:12,112 --> 00:15:14,014 - I'LL SAY. - [laughs] 340 00:15:14,047 --> 00:15:16,216 WELL, SO, I'M HERE WITH HIS WALLET. 341 00:15:16,249 --> 00:15:17,150 - COOL. - YEAH. 342 00:15:17,184 --> 00:15:18,651 - HAND IT OVER, STRIPPER. BE ON YOUR WAY. 343 00:15:18,685 --> 00:15:21,488 - NO FINDER'S FEE? 344 00:15:21,521 --> 00:15:26,994 - WHAT, IS EVERYTHING TIP-BASED WITH YOU PEOPLE? 345 00:15:27,027 --> 00:15:31,264 THERE YOU GO. 346 00:15:31,298 --> 00:15:32,532 [mutters] NOT MUCH ROOM THERE. 347 00:15:32,565 --> 00:15:35,202 - MM-HMM. IT'S BEEN A PLEASURE DOING BUSINESS WITH YOU, HANK. 348 00:15:35,235 --> 00:15:37,337 - HOW DO I KNOW YOU DIDN'T TAKE ANYTHING OUT OF HIS WALLET? 349 00:15:37,370 --> 00:15:40,473 - WELL, I'M NOT A FUCKIN' THIEF, YOU ASSHOLE. JESUS. 350 00:15:40,507 --> 00:15:42,642 YOU KNOW, NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED IN THIS TOWN. 351 00:15:42,675 --> 00:15:44,111 - YES, THAT'S RIGHT. 352 00:15:44,144 --> 00:15:46,279 YOU'RE A REGULAR GIRL SCOUT, AREN'T YA? 353 00:15:46,313 --> 00:15:47,514 - WHAT'S YOUR PART IN ALL THIS? - WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 354 00:15:47,547 --> 00:15:48,715 - WELL, HE'S MARRIED. 355 00:15:48,748 --> 00:15:51,051 HE LIVES IN THE BIG HOUSE BEHIND THE WHITE PICKET FENCE, 356 00:15:51,084 --> 00:15:53,420 SO WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU? HIS GAY LOVER? 357 00:15:53,453 --> 00:15:55,355 [both chuckle] 358 00:15:55,388 --> 00:16:00,527 - IF YOU MUST KNOW, HIS WIFE IS MY BABY MAMA. 359 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:02,695 COME HERE. 360 00:16:02,729 --> 00:16:03,696 - WHO'S THAT? 361 00:16:03,730 --> 00:16:05,332 - MY GIRLFRIEND. 362 00:16:05,365 --> 00:16:06,399 - HOLLY. - HOLLY. 363 00:16:06,433 --> 00:16:07,400 - HOLLY! - YEAH. 364 00:16:07,434 --> 00:16:08,501 - KAREN. - KAREN. 365 00:16:08,535 --> 00:16:10,737 - IT'S SO NICE TO MEET YOU, HOLLY. 366 00:16:10,770 --> 00:16:13,773 UM, WELL, YOU GUYS WANNA COME IN, OR-- 367 00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:15,175 - NO, NO, SHE'S JUST MEETING ME HERE. 368 00:16:15,208 --> 00:16:17,277 WE'RE GOING HIKING. 369 00:16:17,310 --> 00:16:18,411 - YOU HIKE? 370 00:16:18,445 --> 00:16:19,479 - OH, YEAH! OF COURSE I DO. 371 00:16:19,512 --> 00:16:21,581 I LOVE IT. LOVE IT. 372 00:16:21,614 --> 00:16:23,383 - WHERE? 373 00:16:23,416 --> 00:16:25,485 - UM, GONNA GO UP, 374 00:16:25,518 --> 00:16:29,556 UH, MANDER...HOFF CANYON. 375 00:16:29,589 --> 00:16:31,458 - I HAVEN'T HEARD OF THAT. - ME NEITHER! 376 00:16:31,491 --> 00:16:33,393 - WELL, TH-THAT'S WHY I LIKE IT! IT'S LESS CROWDED. 377 00:16:33,426 --> 00:16:35,128 ROAD LESS TRAVELED AND WHATNOT. 378 00:16:35,162 --> 00:16:38,131 YOU GOTTA WATCH OUT FOR THE SNAKES, THOUGH. 379 00:16:38,165 --> 00:16:40,433 - YOU KNOW WHAT, KAREN? I WOULD LOVE TO COME INSIDE. 380 00:16:40,467 --> 00:16:42,702 - NO, NO. - YOU HAVE A BEAUTIFUL HOME. 381 00:16:42,735 --> 00:16:45,438 - THANK YOU, HOLLY. PLEASE COME IN. 382 00:16:45,472 --> 00:16:50,143 WELCOME. 383 00:16:50,177 --> 00:16:51,144 [whispers] IS SHE A STRIPPER? 384 00:16:51,178 --> 00:16:53,346 - NO, SHE'S JUST WORKIN' HER WAY THROUGH SCHOOL. 385 00:16:53,380 --> 00:16:55,682 DON'T BE SO FUCKIN' JUDGMENTAL, KAREN. GOD. 386 00:17:05,858 --> 00:17:07,827 - JESUS! - CHARLIE! 387 00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:10,263 - THAT WAS A LONG FUCKING SHOWER! 388 00:17:10,297 --> 00:17:11,664 - I'M SO SORRY. I DOZED OFF. 389 00:17:11,698 --> 00:17:13,333 I WAS UPSET, AND I SAT ON THE COUCH FOR A SECOND, 390 00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:15,335 AND BEFORE I KNEW IT, TWO HOURS HAD GONE BY. 391 00:17:15,368 --> 00:17:18,638 - IT'S OKAY. I JUST-- I-I GOT SCARED. 392 00:17:18,671 --> 00:17:20,807 NOW, I'M DELIGHTED. 393 00:17:20,840 --> 00:17:23,110 - I'M JUST REALLY OUT OF SORTS. 394 00:17:23,143 --> 00:17:24,344 [sighs] I'VE JUST LOST ANOTHER JOB, 395 00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:26,813 AND I SPENT ALL THIS MONEY ON ACTING CLASSES. 396 00:17:26,846 --> 00:17:28,548 - ACTING CLASSES? 397 00:17:28,581 --> 00:17:30,150 WHAT HAPPENED TO WRITING CHILDREN'S BOOKS? 398 00:17:30,183 --> 00:17:32,519 WH-WH-WHAT HAPPENED TO GOING TO COOKING SCHOOL? 399 00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:35,255 - I TOLD YOU. I CHANGE MY MIND ALL THE TIME. 400 00:17:35,288 --> 00:17:37,557 I HAVEN'T FOUND MYSELF YET. 401 00:17:37,590 --> 00:17:40,627 BESIDES, STU SAID HE THINKS I MIGHT HAVE WHAT IT TAKES 402 00:17:40,660 --> 00:17:41,761 TO BE AN ACTRESS. 403 00:17:41,794 --> 00:17:45,665 - WELL, YOU CERTAINLY GOT THE BEAUTY PART DOWN PAT. 404 00:17:45,698 --> 00:17:49,869 - YOU'RE SO SWEET TO ME, CHARLIE. 405 00:17:49,902 --> 00:17:53,806 - WHAT CAN I SAY, YOU, UH, SUMMON THE SWEETNESS IN ME. 406 00:17:56,343 --> 00:18:00,880 AS WELL AS SOME OTHER STUFF. 407 00:18:00,913 --> 00:18:02,415 - YES, I CAN TELL. [chuckles] 408 00:18:02,449 --> 00:18:05,352 - [sighs] - WELL, GUESS WHAT. 409 00:18:05,385 --> 00:18:08,155 - WHAT? 410 00:18:08,188 --> 00:18:10,290 - I DON'T WORK FOR STU AND MARCY ANYMORE. 411 00:18:10,323 --> 00:18:12,525 - I KNOW. YOU TOLD ME. 412 00:18:12,559 --> 00:18:16,396 - SO, THIS WHOLE THING ISN'T QUITE AS INAPPROPRIATE 413 00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:18,165 AS IT ONCE WAS. 414 00:18:18,198 --> 00:18:22,169 - I GUESS IT'S NOT. 415 00:18:22,202 --> 00:18:23,336 SO... 416 00:18:23,370 --> 00:18:27,574 I GUESS IT WOULDN'T BE INAPPROPRIATE... 417 00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:30,277 TO DO THIS. 418 00:18:36,416 --> 00:18:37,850 - NOT AT ALL. 419 00:18:37,884 --> 00:18:42,522 JUST LIKE IT'S NOT INAPPROPRIATE TO DO THIS. 420 00:18:46,959 --> 00:18:49,696 - [whimpers] 421 00:18:49,729 --> 00:18:52,399 - SO, HOLLY, Y-YOU'RE A DANCER. - YEAH. 422 00:18:52,432 --> 00:18:55,535 - OH, ACTUALLY, KAREN, NO. I AM A STRIPPER. 423 00:18:55,568 --> 00:18:57,770 AND I'M A REALIST. 424 00:18:57,804 --> 00:19:01,608 IT'S LIKE, DO YOU GO TO THE CINEMA, 425 00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:03,176 OR DO YOU GO TO THE MOVIES? 426 00:19:03,210 --> 00:19:05,378 I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT I GO TO THE FUCKIN' MOVIES. 427 00:19:05,412 --> 00:19:07,880 - RIGHT. - HOW 'BOUT YOU, HANDSOME? 428 00:19:07,914 --> 00:19:08,948 HUH? 429 00:19:08,981 --> 00:19:10,883 YOU LIKE STRIPPERS? OR DANCERS? 430 00:19:10,917 --> 00:19:14,521 - OH, STRIP-- DANCERS. 431 00:19:14,554 --> 00:19:15,788 - YOU'RE FUCKIN' HOT, DUDE. 432 00:19:15,822 --> 00:19:18,425 YOU IN A BAND? 433 00:19:18,458 --> 00:19:20,360 - KIND OF A BOYFRIEND-GIRLFRIEND THING GOIN' ON-- 434 00:19:20,393 --> 00:19:23,330 - NO, I'M NOT IN A BAND, BUT I DO PLAY SOME GUITAR. 435 00:19:23,363 --> 00:19:25,832 - OOH, GUITARISTS ARE THE BEST! 436 00:19:25,865 --> 00:19:28,501 SO GOOD WITH THEIR FUCKIN' HANDS! RIGHT? 437 00:19:28,535 --> 00:19:30,570 THEY KNOW HOW TO FIND THE SPOT. RIGHT, BABY? 438 00:19:30,603 --> 00:19:32,439 [laughs] AND THEN THAT GUITAR, 439 00:19:32,472 --> 00:19:34,741 UP ON STAGE, IT'S LIKE THIS PULSING MEMBER, 440 00:19:34,774 --> 00:19:36,776 AND THEY'RE JUST WORKIN' IT, AND WORKIN' IT, AND WORKIN' IT. 441 00:19:36,809 --> 00:19:39,879 I MEAN, YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. RIGHT, HONEY? 442 00:19:39,912 --> 00:19:42,915 - I DON'T WANNA KNOW IF SHE KNOWS WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. 443 00:19:42,949 --> 00:19:46,486 - AM I GONNA HAVE TO GET USED TO THIS ONE, DAD? 444 00:19:46,519 --> 00:19:50,457 - OH, I'M SORRY. I'M NOT VERY DOMESTICATED. 445 00:19:50,490 --> 00:19:51,691 - YEAH, JUST DON'T PEE ON THE RUG. 446 00:19:51,724 --> 00:19:54,861 - OH, I DID THAT ONCE! AT VINCE NEIL'S HOUSE, 447 00:19:54,894 --> 00:19:57,430 I WAS SO DRUNK, I JUST SQUATTED ON THE FLOOR, 448 00:19:57,464 --> 00:19:59,699 AND I PEED EVERYWHERE. [laughs] 449 00:19:59,732 --> 00:20:01,668 HE THOUGHT IT WAS HOT. 450 00:20:01,701 --> 00:20:05,772 - THAT'S NICE. SO, WHERE'D YOU GUYS MEET? 451 00:20:05,805 --> 00:20:07,707 - OH, BACKSTAGE AT A MOTLEY SHOW. 452 00:20:07,740 --> 00:20:10,677 I HAD TO WRAP MY LIPS AROUND THE TOUR MANAGER. 453 00:20:10,710 --> 00:20:12,979 IT WAS TOTALLY WORTH IT. - I THINK SHE MEANS US. 454 00:20:13,012 --> 00:20:16,516 - OH, RIGHT. RIGHT. UM-- 455 00:20:16,549 --> 00:20:19,419 - TRADER JOE'S. - YEAH. 456 00:20:19,452 --> 00:20:23,290 HE WAS HANDLING THE MELONS! [laughs] 457 00:20:23,323 --> 00:20:28,295 - [chuckles] NO. 458 00:20:28,328 --> 00:20:30,730 - SO, YOU TWO USED TO BE A COUPLE, RIGHT? 459 00:20:30,763 --> 00:20:32,599 AND THIS IS YOUR LITTLE GIRL. 460 00:20:32,632 --> 00:20:35,001 SO NOW, WHEN DOES BATES ENTER THE PICTURE? 461 00:20:35,034 --> 00:20:36,403 - HOW DO YOU KNOW RICHARD? 462 00:20:36,436 --> 00:20:39,439 - SHE DOESN'T. I JUST TOLD HER ABOUT HIM. 463 00:20:39,472 --> 00:20:41,040 - WHY? 464 00:20:41,073 --> 00:20:43,710 - 'CAUSE HE'S SUCH A FUCKIN' CHARACTER, KAREN. THAT'S WHY. 465 00:20:43,743 --> 00:20:47,580 - TOTALLY. [gasps] 466 00:20:47,614 --> 00:20:49,582 - I MEAN, FROM WHAT I'VE HEARD. - YEAH. 467 00:20:55,087 --> 00:20:59,392 - SO, UM, ANYONE WANT ANOTHER DRINK? 468 00:20:59,426 --> 00:21:00,660 - I DO! 469 00:21:00,693 --> 00:21:02,329 - I'LL GIVE YOU A HAND, MOM. - THANKS, SWEETIE. 470 00:21:02,362 --> 00:21:03,963 - I'M GONNA COME WITH YOU GUYS. 471 00:21:03,996 --> 00:21:05,932 I NEED TO USE THE LADIES' ROOM. 472 00:21:05,965 --> 00:21:09,836 I GOTTA PEE LIKE A FUCKIN' RACEHORSE. 473 00:21:09,869 --> 00:21:11,037 - [grunts] 474 00:21:11,070 --> 00:21:16,343 - [chuckles] WAY TO GO, HANK. 475 00:21:16,376 --> 00:21:17,810 REALLY NICE GIRL YOU GOT YOURSELF THERE. 476 00:21:17,844 --> 00:21:19,612 [whistles] CLASS UP THE WAZOO. 477 00:21:19,646 --> 00:21:20,613 - SHUT UP. 478 00:21:20,647 --> 00:21:21,748 - YEAH, WHATEVER, LOOK. WHAT I WANNA KNOW IS... 479 00:21:21,781 --> 00:21:25,718 [clears throat] DID BATES FUCK THAT CHICK OR SOMETHING? 480 00:21:25,752 --> 00:21:28,455 - WHAT? YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT MY GIRLFRIEND. 481 00:21:28,488 --> 00:21:30,690 - OH, BULLSHIT. THAT CHICK IS NOT YOUR TYPE. 482 00:21:30,723 --> 00:21:32,659 - WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU KNOW ABOUT MY TYPE? 483 00:21:32,692 --> 00:21:34,327 - I KNOW YOUR TYPE, AND SHE'S INSIDE. 484 00:21:34,361 --> 00:21:36,796 AND SHE'S NOT THE ONE PISSING "LIKE A FUCKIN' RACEHORSE." 485 00:21:36,829 --> 00:21:40,567 MY QUESTION IS, WHY ARE YOU WORKING SO VERY HARD 486 00:21:40,600 --> 00:21:44,637 TO PROTECT HER FROM THE TRUTH? 487 00:21:44,671 --> 00:21:47,440 - WELL, MAYBE SHE'S BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH, ALL RIGHT? 488 00:21:47,474 --> 00:21:50,042 - OKAY, YEAH, BUT MAYBE SHE AND BATES DON'T MAKE IT, 489 00:21:50,076 --> 00:21:52,879 AND THEN YOU'VE GOT YOURSELF ANOTHER SHOT AT THE GOOD LIFE. 490 00:21:52,912 --> 00:21:54,514 - MIND YOUR BUSINESS, SON. 491 00:21:54,547 --> 00:21:56,716 AND DON'T THINK I HAVEN'T ENTERTAINED THAT VERY NOTION. 492 00:21:56,749 --> 00:21:59,552 BUT MY STRICT MORAL CODE PROHIBITS ME... 493 00:21:59,586 --> 00:22:00,720 - FAIR ENOUGH. - ACTING ON IT. 494 00:22:00,753 --> 00:22:03,723 - MM-HMM. 495 00:22:03,756 --> 00:22:06,793 I'VE BEEN MEANING TO ASK YOU... 496 00:22:06,826 --> 00:22:07,794 WOULD YOU DO A FAVOR FOR ME? 497 00:22:07,827 --> 00:22:09,128 - NO. 498 00:22:09,161 --> 00:22:13,132 - NO? THAT QUICK? REALLY? 499 00:22:13,165 --> 00:22:16,035 - WHAT? 500 00:22:16,068 --> 00:22:17,136 - WILL YOU READ MY SCREENPLAY? 501 00:22:17,169 --> 00:22:18,571 - FUCK YOU. 502 00:22:18,605 --> 00:22:20,673 - [scoffs] OKAY. 503 00:22:20,707 --> 00:22:23,476 WELL, JUST SO YOU KNOW... 504 00:22:23,510 --> 00:22:27,414 I DON'T HAVE THE SAME STRICT MORAL CODE THAT YOU DO, HANK. 505 00:22:29,716 --> 00:22:32,685 - I GIVE IT TEN PAGES. - THANK YOU. 506 00:22:32,719 --> 00:22:35,655 [both moaning] 507 00:22:48,801 --> 00:22:51,738 - [sighs] 508 00:22:53,005 --> 00:22:57,143 THAT... WAS EXQUISITE! 509 00:22:57,176 --> 00:22:59,612 BEST SEX OF MY LIFE! DID YOU SEE HOW LONG I LASTED? 510 00:22:59,646 --> 00:23:00,747 - [cries] 511 00:23:00,780 --> 00:23:05,852 - HUH? OH, NO. NO, N-- YOU'RE CRYING. 512 00:23:05,885 --> 00:23:08,120 OF COURSE YOU'RE CRYING. 513 00:23:08,154 --> 00:23:10,490 I DIRTIED YOU. I'M SO SORRY. 514 00:23:10,523 --> 00:23:14,594 - I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO DO NOW. 515 00:23:14,627 --> 00:23:19,966 [cell phone vibrates] - [sighs] 516 00:23:19,999 --> 00:23:21,968 F--[exhales] HELLO? 517 00:23:22,001 --> 00:23:23,736 [baby crying] - HAVE YOU TALKED TO LIZZIE? 518 00:23:23,770 --> 00:23:24,637 - NO. 519 00:23:24,671 --> 00:23:27,006 - WELL, I LEFT HER A BUNCH OF MESSAGES, 520 00:23:27,039 --> 00:23:28,641 AND SHE'S NOT CALLING ME BACK. 521 00:23:28,675 --> 00:23:31,210 - WHY SHOULD SHE? YOU FIRED HER FOR NO FUCKING REASON. 522 00:23:31,243 --> 00:23:33,846 - OKAY, SO I'M HIRING HER BACK, 523 00:23:33,880 --> 00:23:35,548 BECAUSE STUART'S A LITTLE FUCKIN' NIGHTMARE, 524 00:23:35,582 --> 00:23:37,016 AND SHE'S GOT THE MAGIC TOUCH. 525 00:23:37,049 --> 00:23:40,753 - SHE CERTAINLY DOES. 526 00:23:40,787 --> 00:23:44,223 WELL, IF I SEE HER, I WILL LET HER KNOW. 527 00:23:44,256 --> 00:23:46,092 - THANKS. 528 00:23:46,125 --> 00:23:47,560 HEY, YOU WOULDN'T WANNA COME OVER HERE 529 00:23:47,594 --> 00:23:49,128 AND SEE IF YOU COULD PUT STUART DOWN, WOULD YOU-- 530 00:23:49,161 --> 00:23:54,867 [phone clicks] HELLO? 531 00:23:54,901 --> 00:23:57,670 - GUESS WHAT. - WHAT? 532 00:23:57,704 --> 00:24:00,640 - LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE GOT YOU YOUR JOB BACK. 533 00:24:00,673 --> 00:24:03,776 - [laughs] THANK YOU, CHARLIE. 534 00:24:03,810 --> 00:24:06,879 - I GUESS... 535 00:24:06,913 --> 00:24:08,147 THIS ISN'T QUITE SO... 536 00:24:08,180 --> 00:24:10,550 [British accent] APPROPRIATE ANYMORE? 537 00:24:10,583 --> 00:24:15,121 - WELL, I HAVEN'T OFFICIALLY ACCEPTED THE POSITION YET. 538 00:24:15,154 --> 00:24:17,990 - AH. - UH-HUH. 539 00:24:18,024 --> 00:24:20,993 [Jackyl's She Loves My Cock] 540 00:24:21,027 --> 00:24:27,634 * 541 00:24:27,667 --> 00:24:30,703 - * WELL, SHE LOVES MY COCK 542 00:24:30,737 --> 00:24:32,705 * LOVES MY COCK 543 00:24:32,739 --> 00:24:35,107 - COME ON, GIRLS, UNLEASH YOUR INNER WHORES. 544 00:24:35,141 --> 00:24:38,044 I KNOW THEY'RE IN THERE. COME ON. LIKE THIS. 545 00:24:38,077 --> 00:24:40,513 COME ON, ROLL YOUR HIPS. YOU KNOW-- 546 00:24:40,547 --> 00:24:41,748 - DID YOU PUT SOMETHING IN MY DRINK? 547 00:24:41,781 --> 00:24:42,882 - WELL, IF I DID, I GOT SOME IN MINE, TOO. 548 00:24:42,915 --> 00:24:43,816 THAT'S FOR SURE. 549 00:24:43,850 --> 00:24:46,653 - THE POLE, RIGHT. UH-HUH, UH-HUH, UH-HUH. 550 00:24:46,686 --> 00:24:48,020 COME ON, TALL BOY. 551 00:24:48,054 --> 00:24:50,990 - UH...OH! 552 00:24:51,023 --> 00:24:51,991 [clears throat] 553 00:24:52,024 --> 00:24:54,226 - YES. 554 00:24:54,260 --> 00:24:56,929 UH-HUH. UH-HUH. UH-HUH. 555 00:24:56,963 --> 00:24:58,765 - ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. - HEY! 556 00:24:58,798 --> 00:25:00,767 - HEY. HEY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 557 00:25:00,800 --> 00:25:02,869 - WHAT THE FUCK? 558 00:25:02,902 --> 00:25:05,938 - HEY! HEY, HEY! OW! - [yells] 559 00:25:05,972 --> 00:25:09,141 GET OUT! GET OUT! - HEY! 560 00:25:09,175 --> 00:25:11,678 [Bates growls] [Holly screams] 561 00:25:11,711 --> 00:25:13,212 - YOU COME TO MY HOME? 562 00:25:13,245 --> 00:25:17,183 YOU LAY HANDS ON MY WOMAN? HOW FUCKING DARE YOU? 563 00:25:17,216 --> 00:25:19,652 YOU PSYCHO SLUT FROM HELL! 564 00:25:19,686 --> 00:25:21,153 - BATESY, BATESY! SHE'S WITH ME! 565 00:25:21,187 --> 00:25:24,223 THIS IS MY GIRLFRIEND. 566 00:25:24,256 --> 00:25:25,758 HOLLY. 567 00:25:25,792 --> 00:25:33,733 * 568 00:25:43,009 --> 00:25:45,978 - IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU, HOLLY. 569 00:25:46,012 --> 00:25:49,916 I'LL BE UPSTAIRS. 570 00:25:52,752 --> 00:25:53,720 - HOW CAN I HELP? 571 00:25:53,753 --> 00:25:54,587 - YOU CAN TAKE YOUR TRAMP, 572 00:25:54,621 --> 00:25:57,223 AND YOU CAN GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE! 573 00:25:57,256 --> 00:25:58,357 - OH! WHO'S SHE CALLING A TRAMP, HUH? 574 00:25:58,390 --> 00:25:59,926 - PRETTY SURE SHE MEANS YOU. 575 00:25:59,959 --> 00:26:01,661 - THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT. 576 00:26:01,694 --> 00:26:04,330 EVERYTHING YOU FUCKING TOUCH TURNS TO SHIT! 577 00:26:04,363 --> 00:26:05,932 - I KNOW THIS IS PROBABLY NONE OF MY BUSINESS, 578 00:26:05,965 --> 00:26:07,634 BUT I DON'T THINK THIS IS HANK'S FAULT. 579 00:26:07,667 --> 00:26:08,635 - SHUT UP! - SHUT UP! 580 00:26:08,668 --> 00:26:09,902 - SHUTTING UP. 581 00:26:09,936 --> 00:26:11,303 - OH, NO, NO. IT IS MY FAULT. 582 00:26:11,337 --> 00:26:13,673 IT'S ALWAYS MY FAULT. 583 00:26:13,706 --> 00:26:17,009 HOW CAN I BE OF SERVICE? 584 00:26:17,043 --> 00:26:19,045 ALL RIGHT. LET'S GO, TRAMP. 585 00:26:19,078 --> 00:26:20,613 - I'LL GET YOU THAT SCREENPLAY, HANK. 586 00:26:20,647 --> 00:26:21,848 - YEAH, CAN'T WAIT. 587 00:26:21,881 --> 00:26:23,716 BECCA, LET THIS BE A LESSON TO YOU. 588 00:26:23,750 --> 00:26:24,884 STAY OFF THE POLE. 589 00:26:24,917 --> 00:26:28,354 - YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY? DO YOU SEE ANYONE LAUGHING? 590 00:26:28,387 --> 00:26:29,956 I'M SO SICK AND TIRED OF YOU SHOWING UP OUT OF NOWHERE 591 00:26:29,989 --> 00:26:32,892 AND FUCKING WITH OUR LIVES. 592 00:26:32,925 --> 00:26:34,627 LIKE SOMEHOW YOU KNOW BETTER. 593 00:26:34,661 --> 00:26:37,664 YOU MAKE A MESS, AND THEN YOU WALTZ OFF, 594 00:26:37,697 --> 00:26:39,298 LIKE YOU'VE DONE SOMETHING NOBLE. 595 00:26:39,331 --> 00:26:43,202 BUT WE HAVE TO CLEAN UP AFTER YOU! 596 00:26:43,235 --> 00:26:45,772 LET THIS BE A LESSON TO YOU, DAD. 597 00:26:45,805 --> 00:26:49,642 STAY THE FUCK AWAY. 598 00:26:49,676 --> 00:26:53,312 I LIKE YOU MUCH BETTER WHEN YOU'RE IN NEW YORK. 599 00:26:53,345 --> 00:26:56,649 - WHOO! CHICK'S GOT FUCKIN' BALLS, HUH? 600 00:26:56,683 --> 00:26:58,718 THANKS FOR THE HOSPITALITY, BITCHES! 601 00:26:58,751 --> 00:27:02,955 MM-HMM. 602 00:27:02,989 --> 00:27:05,825 - [whispers] YOU ALL RIGHT? 603 00:27:05,858 --> 00:27:08,928 - [sighs] WANNA GET A DRINK? 604 00:27:08,961 --> 00:27:10,329 - SURE, WHY NOT? 605 00:27:10,362 --> 00:27:11,864 - COOL, LET'S HIT THE 'BOW. 606 00:27:11,898 --> 00:27:13,800 - THE RAINBOW? - MM-HMM. 607 00:27:13,833 --> 00:27:16,135 - I WENT THERE ONCE WITH A GUY NAMED LEW ASHBY. 608 00:27:16,168 --> 00:27:17,136 YOU EVER HEARD OF HIM? 609 00:27:17,169 --> 00:27:18,738 - HEAR OF HIM? [laughs] 610 00:27:18,771 --> 00:27:22,675 SUCKED HIS DICK MORE TIMES THAN I CAN COUNT. 611 00:27:22,709 --> 00:27:25,144 OOH! 612 00:27:25,177 --> 00:27:28,815 YOU HAVE A PORSCHE, HUH? 613 00:27:28,848 --> 00:27:31,751 VERY, VERY HOT. THAT MAKES MAMA WET. 614 00:27:31,784 --> 00:27:34,787 HOLY SHIT, THIS IS MY FAVORITE SONG! 615 00:27:34,821 --> 00:27:36,322 CHECK IT OUT. WATCH THIS. 616 00:27:36,355 --> 00:27:39,325 [Whitesnake's Here I Go Again] 617 00:27:39,358 --> 00:27:42,294 - * AND HERE I GO AGAIN ON MY OWN * 618 00:27:42,328 --> 00:27:47,466 * GOING DOWN THE ONLY ROAD I'VE EVER KNOWN * 619 00:27:47,499 --> 00:27:49,869 * LIKE A DRIFTER I WAS BORN * 620 00:27:49,902 --> 00:27:54,140 * TO WALK ALONE 621 00:27:54,173 --> 00:27:59,211 * AND I'VE MADE UP MY MIND 622 00:27:59,245 --> 00:28:03,750 * I AIN'T WASTING NO MORE TIME * 623 00:28:03,783 --> 00:28:08,921 * AND HERE I GO AGAIN ON MY OWN * 624 00:28:08,955 --> 00:28:14,126 * GOING DOWN THE ONLY ROAD I'VE EVER KNOWN * 625 00:28:14,160 --> 00:28:16,228 * LIKE A DRIFTER I WAS BORN 626 00:28:16,262 --> 00:28:20,767 * TO WALK ALONE 627 00:28:20,800 --> 00:28:24,971 * 'CAUSE I KNOW WHAT IT MEANS 628 00:28:25,004 --> 00:28:30,276 * TO WALK ALONG THE LONELY STREET OF DREAMS * 629 00:28:30,309 --> 00:28:33,746 * AN' HERE I GO AGAIN ON MY OWN *