0 00:00:00,340 --> 00:00:01,460 Chuck S02E05 Chuck Versus Tom Sawyer (VO) 1 00:00:05,760 --> 00:00:06,954 Stu Brewster here. 2 00:00:07,120 --> 00:00:11,671 I'd like you all to meet Jeffery Barnes, the new "Missile Command" world champ. 3 00:00:13,960 --> 00:00:15,234 Thanks for joining us, Jeff. 4 00:00:15,400 --> 00:00:16,549 My pleasure, Stu. 5 00:00:16,720 --> 00:00:19,632 Now, Jeff, you've dedicated the last three years of your life... 6 00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:21,358 ...to playing "Missile Command." 7 00:00:21,520 --> 00:00:23,431 You've managed to take a video game... 8 00:00:23,600 --> 00:00:26,910 ...and raise it to a level that can only be described as an art form. 9 00:00:27,080 --> 00:00:30,197 So let me ask the question on everybody's mind: 10 00:00:30,360 --> 00:00:33,432 What's next for Jeff Barnes? 11 00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:35,955 What's next? Uh... 12 00:00:36,720 --> 00:00:39,075 I hadn't really, uh... Heh. 13 00:00:42,400 --> 00:00:46,996 How can I make up my mind when I got so many tasty options? 14 00:00:49,360 --> 00:00:52,318 I've got so many tasty options. 15 00:00:57,840 --> 00:01:00,513 Jeff, please. 16 00:01:04,320 --> 00:01:05,992 There you go, buddy. 17 00:01:09,880 --> 00:01:10,915 Score. 18 00:01:11,680 --> 00:01:12,874 Powwow on the sales floor. 19 00:01:13,040 --> 00:01:15,190 One of you idiots better light a fire under Bartowski. 20 00:01:15,360 --> 00:01:16,998 He's late. 21 00:01:32,200 --> 00:01:34,191 Aren't you forgetting something? 22 00:01:39,280 --> 00:01:41,748 It's only the most important meal of the day, bud. 23 00:01:41,920 --> 00:01:42,955 Of course, ha, ha. 24 00:01:43,120 --> 00:01:44,235 Breakfast. 25 00:01:44,680 --> 00:01:46,033 Thanks. 26 00:01:48,520 --> 00:01:51,910 - What is that? What did I just drink? - Ginseng protein shake. 27 00:01:52,080 --> 00:01:55,038 Been used thousands of years in the east to promote yang energy. 28 00:01:55,200 --> 00:01:58,158 And let me tell you, brother. It does wonders for your wang energy. 29 00:01:58,600 --> 00:02:00,795 - Great, thanks. - Hey, where were you last night? 30 00:02:00,960 --> 00:02:03,110 We heard you come stomping in at 4 in the morning. 31 00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:06,477 Yeah, oh, yeah. It was a crazy night, heh. 32 00:02:06,640 --> 00:02:08,949 Morgan and I stole a car and then we drove around... 33 00:02:09,120 --> 00:02:11,918 ...shaking down liquor stores and smacking around hookers. 34 00:02:12,480 --> 00:02:13,549 Relax. It's a video game. 35 00:02:13,720 --> 00:02:15,756 Oh, good. Video games. 36 00:02:15,920 --> 00:02:18,036 Ellie, what's one night of blowing off steam? 37 00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:21,431 One nights have a way of adding up. What's cool when you're in college... 38 00:02:21,600 --> 00:02:24,672 We're just wondering, what happened to all your big plans, bro? 39 00:02:25,080 --> 00:02:29,039 All that talk about backpacking across Europe or finishing your college classes? 40 00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:31,760 I just have a lot on my plate at this precise moment. 41 00:02:31,920 --> 00:02:33,399 Like what, precisely? 42 00:02:34,440 --> 00:02:36,908 Chuck, we were happy when you decided not to move out... 43 00:02:37,080 --> 00:02:39,389 ...but shouldn't your life be moving somewhere? 44 00:02:39,880 --> 00:02:42,474 It's time for you people to get moving around here. 45 00:02:42,640 --> 00:02:44,517 Show some initiative. 46 00:02:44,680 --> 00:02:45,954 Well... 47 00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:48,352 I got just the guy to help. 48 00:02:49,360 --> 00:02:51,112 I'd like you to meet Emmett Milbarge. 49 00:02:51,280 --> 00:02:52,998 Emmett here is an efficiency expert... 50 00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:56,311 ...and he's been sent by Buy More corporate to tighten your slack asses up. 51 00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:59,870 Oh, thank you for your very kind words of introduction, Michael. 52 00:03:00,040 --> 00:03:01,996 I'll be in my office. 53 00:03:02,160 --> 00:03:03,275 Well... 54 00:03:03,440 --> 00:03:06,716 It is just so nice to be here in, oh... 55 00:03:08,040 --> 00:03:09,553 Burbank. 56 00:03:10,880 --> 00:03:12,359 Burbank, California. 57 00:03:13,280 --> 00:03:15,953 It's just a real pleasure to meet all of you in the flesh. 58 00:03:16,120 --> 00:03:18,031 - Ahem. - I, personally, am looking forward... 59 00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:20,395 ...to spending more time here in the Buy More trenches. 60 00:03:20,560 --> 00:03:23,233 Getting to know the rank and the file. 61 00:03:23,400 --> 00:03:25,789 Unfortunately, my visit here isn't gonna be all be fun. 62 00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:29,077 I'm gonna be interviewing you and evaluating you on your performance... 63 00:03:29,240 --> 00:03:33,153 ...and perhaps even trimming the fat. 64 00:03:34,760 --> 00:03:36,830 So who would like to go first? 65 00:03:39,400 --> 00:03:42,358 We'll just start out simple. Why do you belong at the Buy More? 66 00:03:42,520 --> 00:03:46,069 I satisfy a quota. My dad's part-Indian. 67 00:03:46,480 --> 00:03:49,472 The cool kind of Indian, though, not like Lester. 68 00:03:49,640 --> 00:03:55,636 I used to be in management myself, so why not, uh, grease the store's cogs? 69 00:03:56,040 --> 00:04:00,431 - Cogs? - Make sure they don't squeak. 70 00:04:03,120 --> 00:04:04,473 If you know what I'm saying. 71 00:04:06,920 --> 00:04:08,558 Why do I belong at the Buy More? 72 00:04:08,720 --> 00:04:11,678 I'm gonna have to think about that. I'm gonna go, I'm gonna grab a soda. 73 00:04:11,840 --> 00:04:14,149 And then... You want one? It's my treat. 74 00:04:14,320 --> 00:04:16,629 I'll... I'll grab you one and I'll be back in a jiff. 75 00:04:21,200 --> 00:04:23,953 I speak more than one language. Binary code. 76 00:04:24,120 --> 00:04:29,035 Zero, zero, zero, one, one, zero, one. 77 00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:30,389 Zero. 78 00:04:32,280 --> 00:04:34,077 What would I do? 79 00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:36,390 I'd just ask, "WWCD?" 80 00:04:37,120 --> 00:04:38,519 - What would Chuck do? - Chuck? 81 00:04:38,680 --> 00:04:41,319 The chain of command? Well, there's, like, Chuck. 82 00:04:41,480 --> 00:04:43,391 And then there's, like, the rest of us. 83 00:04:43,560 --> 00:04:44,709 Oh, and then there's Jeff. 84 00:04:44,880 --> 00:04:48,839 Wonder what Chuck's doing now. 85 00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:51,753 Who represents the Buy More ideal? Who makes the trains run on time? 86 00:04:51,920 --> 00:04:53,069 Who provides your moral compass? 87 00:04:53,240 --> 00:04:55,037 - Who holds the team together? - Chuck. 88 00:04:55,200 --> 00:04:57,634 - Chuck. - Lester. No, Chuck. 89 00:04:57,800 --> 00:04:58,915 - Chuck. - Well... 90 00:04:59,520 --> 00:05:02,398 I'm looking forward to meeting this Chuck fella. 91 00:05:03,600 --> 00:05:04,953 If he ever decides to show up. 92 00:05:05,120 --> 00:05:06,348 Oh, Jeez. 93 00:05:06,520 --> 00:05:09,273 - You picked a hell of a morning to be late. - Yeah, crazy night. 94 00:05:09,440 --> 00:05:11,795 Lover's tryst? Say no more. 95 00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:15,316 Unless you care to infuse your story with a more tawdry level of detail. 96 00:05:15,480 --> 00:05:18,472 Listen, there's this efficiency guy and he's been looking for you. 97 00:05:18,640 --> 00:05:21,313 If he asks, you have gallstone issues. That's a thing, right? 98 00:05:21,480 --> 00:05:23,152 - Morgan. - I had to think on my feet. 99 00:05:23,320 --> 00:05:25,675 This Emmett guy has been busting my... 100 00:05:26,440 --> 00:05:29,876 Preconceptions. And helping me see the Buy More in a whole new... 101 00:05:30,040 --> 00:05:31,871 Hey, hello. Ha-ha-ha. 102 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:34,873 This is him, Chuck. 103 00:05:35,040 --> 00:05:37,679 - We finally meet, Chuck. - Hi, ha, ha. 104 00:05:47,280 --> 00:05:49,111 Are you feeling all right? 105 00:05:50,160 --> 00:05:51,149 No, yes. 106 00:05:51,320 --> 00:05:53,231 Yes, I'm fine. 107 00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:55,038 Oh, actually, on second thought. 108 00:05:55,200 --> 00:05:56,792 I think my gallstones are acting up. 109 00:05:56,960 --> 00:05:58,109 So... 110 00:06:12,680 --> 00:06:14,033 Hi. 111 00:06:14,840 --> 00:06:16,353 Know this man? 112 00:06:19,240 --> 00:06:20,229 No. 113 00:06:20,400 --> 00:06:22,356 No. Never seen him before in my life. 114 00:06:22,520 --> 00:06:25,398 Wait. Is that one of the sweat hogs on Welcome Back Kotter? 115 00:06:25,560 --> 00:06:28,120 - He's a Buy More employee. - He doesn't work in this store. 116 00:06:28,280 --> 00:06:33,308 But you should check out one of our 13 convenient Southern California locations. 117 00:06:34,800 --> 00:06:36,358 Hmm. 118 00:07:36,040 --> 00:07:37,359 Farrokh Bulsara. 119 00:07:37,520 --> 00:07:39,397 Born in the Asir province, 1974. 120 00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:42,313 The past 10 years, he's been hopping between training camps... 121 00:07:42,480 --> 00:07:43,595 ...from Syria to Somalia. 122 00:07:43,760 --> 00:07:45,671 What does a terrorist want with a nerd like Jeff? 123 00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:48,593 Insightful question. That's why we have an Intersect. 124 00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:50,478 We want you to approach Jeff socially. 125 00:07:50,640 --> 00:07:53,996 Get to know him better and see if you can get him to open up about his past. 126 00:07:54,160 --> 00:07:56,390 You want me to hang out with Jeff? 127 00:07:56,560 --> 00:08:00,439 It's either that or have an agency interrogation team go to work on him. 128 00:08:00,600 --> 00:08:03,398 Great. It comes down to either torturing him or torturing me. 129 00:08:03,560 --> 00:08:05,198 Looks like we got a bogey. 130 00:08:07,720 --> 00:08:09,711 - Sarah? - Is that my sister? 131 00:08:09,880 --> 00:08:11,279 What a surprise. 132 00:08:11,440 --> 00:08:14,512 Yeah, um, I was just driving around. I thought it'd be nice, uh... 133 00:08:15,360 --> 00:08:18,750 I thought it'd be nice if you and I could talk without Chuck, actually. 134 00:08:19,480 --> 00:08:21,311 Oh, okay. 135 00:08:22,600 --> 00:08:24,318 - Ahem. - Hey... 136 00:08:24,680 --> 00:08:26,955 Not polite to spy, Chuck. 137 00:08:27,120 --> 00:08:30,510 I would hate it if he found out that I was going behind his back like this. 138 00:08:30,680 --> 00:08:32,830 Oh, well, your secret is safe with me. 139 00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:35,309 Do you know if he has any plans...? 140 00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:36,833 Tonight? Uh... 141 00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:39,594 Actually, I think he is hanging out with Jeff. 142 00:08:41,800 --> 00:08:46,430 - Nerd Herd, creepy-serial-killer Jeff? - Yeah. 143 00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:48,989 You know, I think it's time that you and I had a talk. 144 00:09:02,760 --> 00:09:04,557 Hmm. 145 00:09:05,800 --> 00:09:08,519 Well, hope you enjoyed your fro-yo. 146 00:09:08,680 --> 00:09:12,229 Huh, yeah. I was, uh, just seeing my girlfriend. 147 00:09:12,400 --> 00:09:14,436 Girlfriend? Oh. Ha-ha-ha. 148 00:09:14,600 --> 00:09:16,591 I, too, have a special lady friend. 149 00:09:17,680 --> 00:09:18,795 Henrietta. 150 00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:20,678 She works in our Ontario branch, Accounts Payable. 151 00:09:20,840 --> 00:09:22,512 - Ah. - She's a real tigress. 152 00:09:24,680 --> 00:09:25,954 Well. 153 00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:29,954 We've gotten our love lives out the way, perhaps you'd like to sit for our interview. 154 00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:33,476 How's tomorrow? Because I'm really more of a morning person. 155 00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:36,831 Well, I'll be the judge of that. 156 00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:39,870 Hey, buddy. Where you going? 157 00:09:40,040 --> 00:09:41,359 What'd I do? 158 00:09:41,520 --> 00:09:43,078 Nothing. No. 159 00:09:43,240 --> 00:09:44,673 You know, nothing. Just... 160 00:09:45,360 --> 00:09:48,193 You know, we never really get the chance to talk. 161 00:09:48,360 --> 00:09:50,078 How about we grab a beer? 162 00:09:51,480 --> 00:09:53,072 No, thanks. 163 00:09:53,960 --> 00:09:56,235 I could be enticed to grab a dozen beers, however. 164 00:09:58,000 --> 00:10:00,036 - It's a date. - We can kick it at my place. 165 00:10:00,360 --> 00:10:02,430 You're gonna love Roscoe. He's my ferret. 166 00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:04,669 Ooh, that's... 167 00:10:04,840 --> 00:10:09,152 You know what? I'm actually allergic to every member of the polecat family. 168 00:10:09,320 --> 00:10:11,072 So maybe we could kick it here. 169 00:10:12,080 --> 00:10:13,433 Sure. 170 00:10:14,280 --> 00:10:16,919 - Hmm. - Hmm. 171 00:10:20,040 --> 00:10:22,156 Following a thorough inspection of the branch... 172 00:10:22,320 --> 00:10:26,677 ...there seems to be no sign of intelligent life. 173 00:10:30,280 --> 00:10:33,636 May I present tonight's feature entertainment. 174 00:10:49,080 --> 00:10:52,834 - You made an Anna music video? - You like? 175 00:10:53,440 --> 00:10:54,475 Wow. 176 00:10:55,080 --> 00:10:59,153 It's really... Wow. 177 00:10:59,320 --> 00:11:01,880 I know, man. Heh, she's my muse. 178 00:11:02,840 --> 00:11:06,958 Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to slip into my drinking pants. 179 00:11:07,120 --> 00:11:08,633 Look at that, ha, ha. 180 00:11:12,840 --> 00:11:15,957 Abort mission, extraction required. The Intersect has been compromised. 181 00:11:16,120 --> 00:11:17,872 Negative. The perimeter is secure. 182 00:11:18,040 --> 00:11:20,429 I'm talking about the weirdo inside the Buy More. 183 00:11:20,600 --> 00:11:23,239 I'm starting to think that there's something going on with my brother. 184 00:11:23,400 --> 00:11:24,879 Oh. 185 00:11:25,040 --> 00:11:26,871 Why? What do you mean? 186 00:11:27,720 --> 00:11:31,076 It's just everything seemed to be moving along just fine for Chuck. 187 00:11:31,240 --> 00:11:35,074 - And you had everything to do with that. - Oh, thanks, but I can't take the credit. 188 00:11:35,240 --> 00:11:36,753 Then, I don't know... 189 00:11:36,920 --> 00:11:39,878 ...it's like... It's like he's slipping back into old-Chuck mode. 190 00:11:40,040 --> 00:11:42,156 You know, no confidence, no direction. 191 00:11:42,320 --> 00:11:44,231 It's the Morgan years revisited. 192 00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:46,072 He went to Stanford, for God's sakes. 193 00:11:46,240 --> 00:11:48,879 Did you know he's 12 credits short of graduating? 194 00:11:49,040 --> 00:11:51,076 Twelve credits short of a real life. 195 00:11:52,960 --> 00:11:55,235 I know that I sound like his mother. 196 00:11:55,400 --> 00:11:58,472 Just tell me that I don't have anything to worry about and I will lay off. 197 00:11:58,640 --> 00:12:00,835 Ha-ha-ha, pow, pow, pow. 198 00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:02,877 - No! - Yes! 199 00:12:03,040 --> 00:12:04,234 Pow, pow. 200 00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:06,789 - Quit being such a lightweight. - Resuming dictation. 201 00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:08,359 Yes, yes. 202 00:12:08,520 --> 00:12:10,988 Like to report the following violation of Buy More policy: 203 00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:13,355 Misappropriation of the home-theater room. 204 00:12:13,520 --> 00:12:16,637 After-hours consumption of alcohol. 205 00:12:16,960 --> 00:12:18,598 And lewd use of a musical montage. 206 00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:21,633 Yeah. 207 00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:25,315 Crazy thing happened today. 208 00:12:25,480 --> 00:12:28,358 Uh, some dude came into the store looking for you. 209 00:12:28,520 --> 00:12:31,432 He had this goofy old picture and everything. 210 00:12:31,600 --> 00:12:33,477 Only a matter of time, I guess. 211 00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:35,839 What? 212 00:12:36,520 --> 00:12:37,714 You mean, you know the guy? 213 00:12:37,880 --> 00:12:41,395 I'd imagine he's one of my fans. 214 00:12:47,960 --> 00:12:50,918 You want to see something I've never shared with anyone? 215 00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:53,630 Please don't be a porno. Please, please don't be a porno. 216 00:12:53,800 --> 00:12:56,109 I'd like you all to meet Jeffrey Barnes. 217 00:12:56,280 --> 00:13:00,034 The new "Missile Command" world champ. 218 00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:02,839 "Missile Command"? I used to kick ass at that game. 219 00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:05,671 Well, I was the best. 220 00:13:05,840 --> 00:13:07,831 By breaking the all-time record... 221 00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:13,199 ...you've won $ 100 in quarters and a year's supply of Slim Jim's. 222 00:13:13,360 --> 00:13:17,751 This prize will be presented by none other than Mr. Morimoto... 223 00:13:17,920 --> 00:13:21,117 ...CEO and chief engineer at Atari Games. 224 00:13:24,560 --> 00:13:27,597 Dude, you are so wasted. Ha-ha-ha. 225 00:13:27,760 --> 00:13:28,829 Uh. 226 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:42,468 What is it about bad guys and vans? 227 00:13:48,360 --> 00:13:50,078 Okay, Chuck, party's over. Hey, hey! 228 00:13:50,240 --> 00:13:52,196 I flashed. Some guy on TV, he's a video-game designer. 229 00:13:52,360 --> 00:13:53,998 We have guests. Out the back door. 230 00:13:54,160 --> 00:13:55,639 - What about Jeff? - What about him? 231 00:13:55,800 --> 00:13:58,155 - We can't just leave him here. - He's dead weight. 232 00:13:59,080 --> 00:14:01,150 - You weren't kidding. - Let's go, let's go. 233 00:14:05,800 --> 00:14:09,395 If he pukes on my upholstery, he's gonna wish we left him with the terrorists. 234 00:14:13,560 --> 00:14:14,595 Search the place. 235 00:14:14,760 --> 00:14:16,512 Should I be worried about him? 236 00:14:16,680 --> 00:14:19,717 You know, um, Chuck is, uh... 237 00:14:19,880 --> 00:14:21,154 Chuck is like a duck. 238 00:14:21,760 --> 00:14:24,877 Sometimes it seems like he is just gliding along... 239 00:14:25,040 --> 00:14:26,393 ...but beneath the surface... 240 00:14:26,560 --> 00:14:29,791 ...his, uh, little feet are just paddling away like crazy. 241 00:14:31,120 --> 00:14:36,558 Deep down, I really think Chuck is an incredibly mature and responsible guy. 242 00:14:38,760 --> 00:14:40,113 Chuck? 243 00:14:40,800 --> 00:14:42,438 - Is he okay? - Yeah. 244 00:14:42,600 --> 00:14:44,431 Don't worry. This guy's feeling no pain. 245 00:14:45,800 --> 00:14:46,789 Here we go. 246 00:14:46,960 --> 00:14:49,315 Here we go, big boy. Big boy. 247 00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:55,792 What's up, ladies? 248 00:14:58,600 --> 00:15:02,309 You take the brunette, I'm gonna take a crack at the blond. 249 00:15:06,760 --> 00:15:09,149 Heh. This guy. 250 00:15:14,520 --> 00:15:18,479 - Oh! Jeff. - I'm, uh, supposed to give this to you. 251 00:15:20,840 --> 00:15:24,150 "My name is Jeff and I'm lost." Okay. 252 00:15:24,720 --> 00:15:26,870 - Is that your address? - Yeah. 253 00:15:27,040 --> 00:15:29,270 - We'll get you a cab. - Already have, already here. 254 00:15:29,440 --> 00:15:30,589 Great. So come on, Jeff. 255 00:15:30,760 --> 00:15:33,832 That was a great time last night, huh? You got smashed and passed out. 256 00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:35,718 We watched and it was really awkward. 257 00:15:35,880 --> 00:15:37,393 Okay. Here you go, buddy. 258 00:15:37,560 --> 00:15:39,232 Get home safe. 259 00:15:40,760 --> 00:15:43,354 - Chuck. - About to have one of those talks? 260 00:15:43,520 --> 00:15:45,954 If I wasn't worried, last night's performance was... 261 00:15:46,120 --> 00:15:48,873 - Not one of my proudest moments. - Mm-mm. 262 00:15:49,040 --> 00:15:51,713 I feel like you left all those back at Stanford. 263 00:15:52,520 --> 00:15:54,397 I'm sorry. I just... 264 00:15:54,560 --> 00:15:56,039 You were so close to graduating. 265 00:15:56,200 --> 00:16:00,398 Maybe if you just went back and finished, you could move on to the next phase. 266 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:03,028 - Lf the world were gonna end today... - I... I hear you. 267 00:16:03,200 --> 00:16:04,679 I really do. 268 00:16:04,840 --> 00:16:07,673 But all those goals I used to have, I still have them. 269 00:16:09,480 --> 00:16:10,799 Okay. 270 00:16:11,440 --> 00:16:13,032 Hey, sis. 271 00:16:13,480 --> 00:16:15,630 The world's not gonna end today. 272 00:16:17,680 --> 00:16:19,398 I have very reliable sources. 273 00:16:28,440 --> 00:16:30,192 - Wild night, huh, buddy? - Nah. 274 00:16:30,360 --> 00:16:31,713 Pretty standard Tuesday. 275 00:16:31,880 --> 00:16:35,759 This is bad. This is very bad. Can't you see that we're losing them? 276 00:16:35,920 --> 00:16:38,514 I'm your best friend, Jeff. No, I'm your best friend, Chuck. 277 00:16:38,680 --> 00:16:40,671 Oh, isn't life grand? 278 00:16:41,760 --> 00:16:43,432 Maybe we should form an alliance. 279 00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:46,751 - You and me could be best friends. - Whoa, whoa, whoa, dude. 280 00:16:46,920 --> 00:16:48,399 Let's not, uh... 281 00:16:48,560 --> 00:16:49,959 Let's not panic here, okay? 282 00:16:50,120 --> 00:16:52,680 - Thanks, man. Very comfortable. - Well, you know... 283 00:16:52,840 --> 00:16:54,193 Sure. 284 00:16:54,560 --> 00:16:55,788 Excuse me. 285 00:16:55,960 --> 00:16:57,712 We need to talk. 286 00:16:58,520 --> 00:17:00,192 My sister thinks I'm an idiot, I know. 287 00:17:00,360 --> 00:17:04,399 Actually, we just got some fresh intel on your favorite video-game designer. 288 00:17:05,600 --> 00:17:08,034 There were a few things Morimoto left out of his bio. 289 00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:10,794 Yeah. The guy secretly worked for Japanese military. 290 00:17:10,960 --> 00:17:14,157 In 1980, they launched Morimoto's first-generation weapon satellite. 291 00:17:14,320 --> 00:17:16,072 The guy who made "Missile Command"... 292 00:17:16,240 --> 00:17:18,117 ...commands actual missiles? - Via satellite. 293 00:17:18,280 --> 00:17:20,635 It's still up there, dormant but presumed operational. 294 00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:23,268 Anyone knows how to fire that puppy up, it's Morimoto. 295 00:17:23,440 --> 00:17:25,510 He's working with Farrokh and the terrorist? 296 00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:27,113 He hasn't been seen in years. 297 00:17:27,280 --> 00:17:30,829 But we captured this image outside Morimoto's office about an hour ago. 298 00:17:33,560 --> 00:17:36,358 What about Jeff? How's he supposed to be involved in all this? 299 00:17:36,520 --> 00:17:38,875 Only way to find out is to get to Atari headquarters. 300 00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:40,189 Security's gonna be tight. 301 00:17:40,360 --> 00:17:44,831 If we don't secure the satellite, Jeff's safety will be the least of our concerns. 302 00:17:45,000 --> 00:17:46,274 So how do you wanna do this? 303 00:17:47,560 --> 00:17:48,879 Guys. 304 00:17:50,080 --> 00:17:51,149 I have an idea. 305 00:17:52,200 --> 00:17:54,668 - Be cool, Casey. - Have you seen what I'm wearing? 306 00:17:54,840 --> 00:17:56,796 Let me do the talking. These are my people. 307 00:17:56,960 --> 00:17:57,949 Programmers, nerds. 308 00:17:58,120 --> 00:18:01,317 Right now their network is being attacked by a particularly nasty virus. 309 00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:03,869 Back at Stanford, we called it the Bartowski special. 310 00:18:04,040 --> 00:18:06,076 Yeah. Real cool there, Chuck. 311 00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:12,475 Gentlemen, excuse me. 312 00:18:13,320 --> 00:18:15,914 - What do you want? - Heard you're having a computer problem. 313 00:18:16,080 --> 00:18:18,389 Someone called. Bill, Bob? I can't remember exactly. 314 00:18:18,560 --> 00:18:20,118 - A common name. - We got it covered. 315 00:18:20,280 --> 00:18:21,679 - Mind if I take a peek? - Look, nerd. 316 00:18:21,840 --> 00:18:24,673 Atari has more Ph.D.'s than frigging Microsoft. 317 00:18:24,840 --> 00:18:27,195 Why don't you go help some old lady log onto AOL? 318 00:18:27,360 --> 00:18:29,999 Ha-ha-ha, nice one. Ooh! 319 00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:35,679 Plan B. 320 00:18:52,800 --> 00:18:54,028 Hi. 321 00:18:55,920 --> 00:18:57,717 I hear you're having a computer problem. 322 00:19:00,480 --> 00:19:02,277 If I can just get onto the terminal... 323 00:19:02,440 --> 00:19:05,637 ...I can set off the fire alarm, crash the power, create a diversion. 324 00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:08,552 Or we could just take the stairs. 325 00:19:08,720 --> 00:19:11,757 Looks like Agent Walker's got the diversion pretty well covered. 326 00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:26,556 She doesn't know how to fix a computer. She touches that, our cover is blown. 327 00:19:26,720 --> 00:19:30,508 The CPUs have been overvolted, we may be able to ghost the drive another system. 328 00:19:30,680 --> 00:19:34,150 Ha. The more elegant solution would be to flash the bios... 329 00:19:34,320 --> 00:19:36,390 ...and swap out the cooked CPU. 330 00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:39,434 What are you guys waiting for? 331 00:19:52,000 --> 00:19:53,558 Hmm. 332 00:19:53,840 --> 00:19:56,308 Okay. See if I can find another way into the penthouse. 333 00:19:56,480 --> 00:19:57,913 You wait here where it's safe. 334 00:20:01,360 --> 00:20:04,193 This place is creepy. 335 00:20:04,920 --> 00:20:07,434 So creepy. 336 00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:16,039 Well, if it isn't my friend from the Buy More. 337 00:20:16,360 --> 00:20:18,749 What a funny coincidence finding you here. 338 00:20:18,920 --> 00:20:21,639 Yeah. It's freaking hilarious. 339 00:20:22,040 --> 00:20:23,359 What a small world, right? 340 00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:26,751 I got a... I got a call about a computer that was acting up here, so... 341 00:20:26,920 --> 00:20:30,196 - Is this the right floor? I don't know... - You have the correct floor. 342 00:20:30,360 --> 00:20:31,349 This way, please. 343 00:20:31,520 --> 00:20:33,875 You know, if you're busy, I can come back another time. 344 00:20:34,040 --> 00:20:36,031 Your timing was perfect. 345 00:20:39,880 --> 00:20:42,678 I hope the machine doesn't give you too much trouble. 346 00:21:04,040 --> 00:21:06,110 You should not be here. 347 00:21:06,280 --> 00:21:09,192 Um, uh. 348 00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:13,153 Mr. Morimoto? 349 00:21:13,320 --> 00:21:14,389 You listening to Rush? 350 00:21:14,560 --> 00:21:16,915 Too late. He took the code. 351 00:21:17,080 --> 00:21:18,752 Who are they? Terrorists? 352 00:21:18,920 --> 00:21:22,117 I knew I should never have hidden the numbers inside the machine. 353 00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:25,317 You hid the satellite code inside a game of "Missile Command"? 354 00:21:25,480 --> 00:21:26,549 Every game. 355 00:21:26,720 --> 00:21:29,188 Hidden in the final board. A kill screen. 356 00:21:29,360 --> 00:21:31,430 A secret level only I could achieve. 357 00:21:31,600 --> 00:21:34,797 The mathematics underlying the final board are too advanced. 358 00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:36,791 It's like the music of the universe. 359 00:21:37,840 --> 00:21:40,559 - Ugh, hands up. - I am sorry. I cannot do that. 360 00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:42,631 - What's going on here, Chuck? - Wait. 361 00:21:42,800 --> 00:21:45,758 If the bad guys have the code, why are you still playing the game? 362 00:21:45,920 --> 00:21:48,559 - Uh-oh. - What do you mean, uh-oh? 363 00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:51,353 You're running out of time. 364 00:21:52,840 --> 00:21:54,671 - Save yourselves. - Let's get out of here. 365 00:21:54,840 --> 00:21:56,876 - No, no, we can't leave him. - Not this time. 366 00:21:57,040 --> 00:21:59,156 - No. - Go. Run, run. 367 00:22:04,640 --> 00:22:05,789 Come on, come on. 368 00:22:12,680 --> 00:22:15,114 We're sorry to report Farrokh's team has the code. 369 00:22:15,280 --> 00:22:16,599 And they murdered Morimoto. 370 00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:19,832 That means that your duties are no longer required on this operation. 371 00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:23,310 Casey, we're turning this matter over to the 30th Space Wing at Vandenberg. 372 00:22:23,480 --> 00:22:25,357 Wait. You're launching an ICBM? 373 00:22:25,520 --> 00:22:28,034 You think you can shoot that satellite before it shoots us? 374 00:22:28,200 --> 00:22:31,795 Morimoto's satellite will be passing over California in four hours. 375 00:22:31,960 --> 00:22:34,952 We shoot it down off the coast before its own missiles are armed. 376 00:22:35,440 --> 00:22:38,318 The satellite falls to Earth with acceptable civilian casualties. 377 00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:41,392 Wait a second. Acceptable what? I'd like to hear the bad version. 378 00:22:42,560 --> 00:22:44,232 - We miss. - What happens then? 379 00:22:44,400 --> 00:22:47,437 Farrokh uses Morimoto's satellite to start World War III. 380 00:22:47,600 --> 00:22:49,352 Hey. What about the kill screen? 381 00:22:49,520 --> 00:22:50,839 - Excuse me? - "Missile Command." 382 00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:52,718 The code is hidden in every arcade game. 383 00:22:52,880 --> 00:22:56,236 If we get to the kill screen, we get the code and control the satellite. 384 00:22:56,560 --> 00:22:59,757 - We'll have our engineers... - No, the only way is by beating the game. 385 00:22:59,920 --> 00:23:02,878 - The only person who can beat the game... - Burned to a crisp. 386 00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:04,712 - I was talking about Jeff. - So was I. 387 00:23:04,880 --> 00:23:07,110 Casey, you coordinate with the Air Force... 388 00:23:07,280 --> 00:23:10,477 ...while Mr. Bartowski pursues his contingency plan. 389 00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:14,155 But I promise you, one way or another, I am bringing that satellite down. 390 00:23:19,440 --> 00:23:22,159 You want me to come out of "Missile Command" retirement? 391 00:23:22,320 --> 00:23:24,311 - You're serious? - Deadly. 392 00:23:25,640 --> 00:23:28,996 - I don't know, man. - Come on. What's the problem? 393 00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:33,038 I guess I'm just cool with resting on my laurels and whatnot. 394 00:23:33,200 --> 00:23:37,512 But, Jeff, you could be the first guy to ever get to the kill screen. 395 00:23:38,080 --> 00:23:40,719 Listen, it doesn't exist. 396 00:23:40,880 --> 00:23:42,518 The kill screen's just a myth. 397 00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:46,150 I promise you it's real. And you're the only one who can do it. 398 00:23:46,320 --> 00:23:49,676 - I'm a little out of shape, mentally... - It's just a stupid video game. 399 00:23:49,840 --> 00:23:52,479 That's where you're wrong, Chuck. It's more than a game. 400 00:23:53,880 --> 00:23:57,350 Besides, what do you care whether I play or not? 401 00:24:02,320 --> 00:24:05,756 I guess I was just really moved by what you said last night. 402 00:24:06,520 --> 00:24:08,590 - Huh? - Oh, you remember. 403 00:24:08,760 --> 00:24:10,352 Come on. 404 00:24:10,840 --> 00:24:15,709 How you were sick and tired of busting your ass at this stupid store. 405 00:24:15,880 --> 00:24:20,158 How you had this incredible gift that you couldn't wait for the world to see. 406 00:24:21,680 --> 00:24:25,229 - Really? I said that? - Sure you did, Jeff. 407 00:24:26,480 --> 00:24:29,199 - About "Missile Command"? - You were very compelling. 408 00:24:34,000 --> 00:24:35,592 Okay, I'll do it. 409 00:24:35,760 --> 00:24:36,954 - I'll play. - Buddy. 410 00:24:37,120 --> 00:24:39,759 But first, I'm gonna need provisions. 411 00:24:39,920 --> 00:24:42,115 I need two bottles of grape cough syrup. 412 00:24:42,280 --> 00:24:44,111 One pound M&M's, no brown. 413 00:24:44,280 --> 00:24:47,989 And my lucky arcade game from the Gas-N-Sip in Tarzana. 414 00:24:48,400 --> 00:24:49,674 Done. 415 00:24:50,080 --> 00:24:51,354 Really? 416 00:24:51,880 --> 00:24:57,830 I want Anna wearing a hula skirt, fanning me with a palm frond. 417 00:24:58,960 --> 00:25:00,951 - Huh? - I sweat profusely when I play. 418 00:25:01,120 --> 00:25:06,478 And finally, I need a crowd. I want you to get some of my old fans back. 419 00:25:06,640 --> 00:25:09,154 Come on, people who were into that game are in their 40s. 420 00:25:09,320 --> 00:25:11,993 They have jobs and wives and kids... 421 00:25:16,720 --> 00:25:18,915 Hey, hey, hey. 422 00:25:19,080 --> 00:25:21,355 Morgan, buddy. Can you give me a hand with this? 423 00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:24,553 - Why don't you ask your buddy Jeff? - Uh, he's in the break room. 424 00:25:24,720 --> 00:25:28,269 We're putting together this, like, video-game-exhibition thingy today. 425 00:25:28,440 --> 00:25:31,079 Jeff's gonna make a run at the all-time "Missile Command" high score. 426 00:25:31,240 --> 00:25:33,310 - Whoa. - Hey, where are you going? 427 00:25:33,480 --> 00:25:34,879 You two guys got it worked out. 428 00:25:35,040 --> 00:25:36,712 Morgan, I desperately need your help. 429 00:25:36,880 --> 00:25:39,155 If Jeff doesn't break the "Missile Command" record... 430 00:25:39,320 --> 00:25:41,072 What, Chuck? World's gonna end? 431 00:25:42,520 --> 00:25:46,229 All I know is I need your help, okay? I can't do this without you. I can't. 432 00:25:46,400 --> 00:25:52,635 Hey, hey. Was Jeff the president of his high-school audio-video club? 433 00:25:53,120 --> 00:25:54,155 - No. - Ah... 434 00:25:54,320 --> 00:25:59,269 Was Jeff a roadie for Mamma Mia! For four straight summers? 435 00:26:02,040 --> 00:26:03,951 Does Jeff own his own smoke machine? 436 00:26:05,840 --> 00:26:07,592 No, but I do, huh? Okay. 437 00:26:07,760 --> 00:26:09,193 Jeff is a loser, dude. 438 00:26:09,360 --> 00:26:11,271 - I'll see what I can do. - You're the best, buddy. 439 00:26:11,440 --> 00:26:14,159 Ugh. Oh, I'm gonna need to borrow your girlfriend. 440 00:26:14,320 --> 00:26:15,833 - Oh, dude, she's all yours. - Great. 441 00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:03,195 Jeff! Jeff! Jeff! 442 00:27:05,920 --> 00:27:08,070 I'm here at a Burbank electronics store... 443 00:27:08,240 --> 00:27:11,437 ...where a local man prepares to break the "Missile Command" record. 444 00:27:11,600 --> 00:27:14,717 Now, for those of you who weren't around a quarter century ago... 445 00:27:14,880 --> 00:27:17,553 ...Jeffrey Barnes first made his mark on... 446 00:27:20,560 --> 00:27:22,949 - way back in 1983. 447 00:27:26,960 --> 00:27:28,632 Sarah, Sarah. I know where Farrokh is. 448 00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:32,873 The terrorists are using a television station to control the satellite. They're in L.A. 449 00:27:34,200 --> 00:27:37,351 Chuck flashed. He knows where they're controlling the satellite. 450 00:27:37,520 --> 00:27:39,750 There's time before the satellite is in range. 451 00:27:39,920 --> 00:27:42,309 Chuck's right. There's nothing you can do to stop it. 452 00:27:42,480 --> 00:27:45,836 - I'm gonna go to the news station. - Knock yourself out. I have my orders. 453 00:27:46,000 --> 00:27:49,231 In 33 minutes and five seconds, this finger's gonna push that button. 454 00:27:49,400 --> 00:27:50,799 Hmm, I'll call you from the road. 455 00:27:50,960 --> 00:27:52,154 - Agent Walker. - Yes? 456 00:27:52,320 --> 00:27:55,756 Who do you trust to bring this down? Some loser playing a video games? 457 00:27:55,920 --> 00:27:56,909 Or Air Force ICBM? 458 00:27:57,320 --> 00:27:58,389 I trust Chuck. 459 00:28:01,440 --> 00:28:03,749 Jeff! Jeff! Jeff! 460 00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:07,989 I'd like you to meet Jeffrey Barnes. Jeffrey Barnes. 461 00:28:11,840 --> 00:28:13,068 Oh. 462 00:28:13,240 --> 00:28:15,595 "Missile Command" world champ. World champ. 463 00:28:15,760 --> 00:28:17,352 I don't feel so hot. 464 00:28:17,520 --> 00:28:19,511 No, no. You're gonna be great. You look great. 465 00:28:19,680 --> 00:28:21,830 - You're gonna kill it. - What was I thinking, man? 466 00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:24,798 No one can get the kill screen. I can't handle the math. 467 00:28:24,960 --> 00:28:28,270 You've dedicated three years of your life to playing "Missile Command." 468 00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:29,875 It's too heavy. 469 00:28:31,120 --> 00:28:34,317 - It feels like my brain is about to... - What's next for Jeff Barnes? 470 00:28:34,480 --> 00:28:36,232 "Missile Command" world champ. 471 00:28:47,600 --> 00:28:49,670 Jefferson. Hey. 472 00:28:49,840 --> 00:28:51,432 I'll get some water. 473 00:28:51,960 --> 00:28:53,678 We need to take care of this. 474 00:28:53,840 --> 00:28:55,876 All right. Take care of him. 475 00:28:58,440 --> 00:29:00,396 Hey, hey. Come on, buddy. Come on. 476 00:29:00,560 --> 00:29:01,993 Wake up, buddy. You gotta play. 477 00:29:02,160 --> 00:29:03,752 Get the kill screen, get the codes. 478 00:29:03,920 --> 00:29:05,433 If we don't stop that satellite... 479 00:29:05,600 --> 00:29:07,830 ...they're gonna launch some missile into space. 480 00:29:08,760 --> 00:29:10,876 And then it's World War III. 481 00:29:11,040 --> 00:29:13,474 "Acceptable civilian casualties." 482 00:29:14,160 --> 00:29:15,718 Oh, my God. 483 00:29:20,320 --> 00:29:21,878 - Hey, what's up? - Hey. 484 00:29:22,040 --> 00:29:23,393 Why don't you get out of town? 485 00:29:23,560 --> 00:29:25,710 Maybe Palm Springs, you and Awesome. 486 00:29:25,880 --> 00:29:28,030 Now would be a great time. Trip's on me. 487 00:29:28,200 --> 00:29:30,714 - Early wedding present. - Are you trying to get rid of me? 488 00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:32,074 Just thought it'd be nice. 489 00:29:32,240 --> 00:29:35,755 - What's gotten into you? - I don't know. I don't know. 490 00:29:36,400 --> 00:29:39,119 I'm sorry. I know I've been a bit of a disappointment lately. 491 00:29:39,280 --> 00:29:42,511 I want you to be proud of me. I just ran out of time, that's all. 492 00:29:42,680 --> 00:29:46,468 - We'll talk about this when you get home. - I gotta run. I love you, Ellie. 493 00:29:52,560 --> 00:29:54,790 Honey, do you think my brother's on drugs? 494 00:29:56,080 --> 00:29:57,991 That'd explain a lot. 495 00:30:00,600 --> 00:30:04,036 They're going nuts, okay? The nerds are gonna tear this joint apart. 496 00:30:04,200 --> 00:30:07,112 - You gotta do something. - What am I suppose to do? 497 00:30:07,280 --> 00:30:10,829 They came to see video-game greatness, someone better deliver. 498 00:30:16,400 --> 00:30:19,233 Ladies and gentlemen, our... 499 00:30:19,400 --> 00:30:22,392 Gentlemen, let me introduce you to the challenger. 500 00:30:22,560 --> 00:30:24,869 Hailing from the City of Angels... 501 00:30:25,040 --> 00:30:29,750 ...the master of disasters, the king of sting, the dancing destroyer... 502 00:30:29,920 --> 00:30:34,596 ...Charles Irving Bartowski. 503 00:31:18,480 --> 00:31:19,959 What the...? 504 00:31:20,120 --> 00:31:21,917 Who authorized this? 505 00:31:22,080 --> 00:31:24,196 This is an abomination. 506 00:31:34,960 --> 00:31:37,394 You suck, Bartowski. 507 00:31:43,400 --> 00:31:44,799 You listening to Rush? 508 00:31:44,960 --> 00:31:47,110 The music of the universe. 509 00:31:50,320 --> 00:31:51,548 "Missile Command." 510 00:31:51,720 --> 00:31:55,918 The mathematical pattern underlying the game is exactly the same as... 511 00:31:57,040 --> 00:31:58,473 Morgan. 512 00:31:59,240 --> 00:32:02,277 Hey, uh, buddy, do we carry any Rush CDs in the store? 513 00:32:02,640 --> 00:32:04,278 No need. I got them all on my Zune. 514 00:32:04,760 --> 00:32:06,591 - You have a Zune? - Are you kidding me? No. 515 00:32:06,760 --> 00:32:08,352 - No, I'll grab my iPod. - Good, good. 516 00:32:08,520 --> 00:32:10,158 I have a very, very special request. 517 00:32:12,880 --> 00:32:16,839 On my mark. Three, two, one. 518 00:32:17,280 --> 00:32:18,315 Mark. 519 00:33:03,000 --> 00:33:05,719 Welcome to Strategic Air Command, Major Casey. 520 00:33:19,880 --> 00:33:20,995 Engaging telemetry. 521 00:33:23,240 --> 00:33:24,514 Arming warhead. 522 00:33:26,720 --> 00:33:29,154 And opening silo door. 523 00:33:57,680 --> 00:34:00,194 - Give me the codes. - It was destroyed. 524 00:34:00,360 --> 00:34:01,679 I am going to do this. 525 00:34:01,880 --> 00:34:03,472 No one can stop the satellite now. 526 00:34:03,640 --> 00:34:05,835 What's the target? What's the satellite aimed at? 527 00:34:06,000 --> 00:34:07,069 Why? It doesn't matter. 528 00:34:07,240 --> 00:34:09,834 No one will remember who threw the first stone. Ugh! 529 00:34:16,080 --> 00:34:17,513 Oh, my God, gentlemen. 530 00:34:17,680 --> 00:34:18,795 We have a kill screen. 531 00:34:18,960 --> 00:34:20,552 I got this. 532 00:34:21,680 --> 00:34:24,558 Target's to range. Releasing synchronized safeties. 533 00:34:24,720 --> 00:34:25,869 On my mark. 534 00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:31,112 Three, two, one. 535 00:34:31,280 --> 00:34:32,759 Mark. 536 00:34:46,480 --> 00:34:48,118 Fire when ready. 537 00:34:51,200 --> 00:34:53,430 - Chuck, what's happening? - Sarah, I did it. 538 00:34:53,600 --> 00:34:56,672 I did it. I beat the game. I got to the kill screen, I got the code. 539 00:34:56,840 --> 00:34:58,478 The game, it follows a pattern. 540 00:34:58,640 --> 00:35:01,950 It's just like Mr. Morimoto said, the music of the universe. 541 00:35:02,120 --> 00:35:03,109 Just give me the code. 542 00:35:03,520 --> 00:35:05,397 Oscar, Zelda... 543 00:35:06,480 --> 00:35:09,631 ...Penguin, Gamma... 544 00:35:09,800 --> 00:35:12,598 ...Sector, Boppo. 545 00:35:18,480 --> 00:35:20,072 Oh, my God. 546 00:35:22,280 --> 00:35:24,953 The satellite's powering down. Terminate launch sequence. 547 00:35:25,120 --> 00:35:27,953 This bogey's bugging out and going home. Damn. 548 00:35:30,640 --> 00:35:32,870 You did it, Chuck. It worked. 549 00:35:33,040 --> 00:35:35,873 How does it feel to be a hero, Mr. Bartowski? 550 00:35:59,320 --> 00:36:01,709 Looks like you fools had a hell of a party. 551 00:36:04,280 --> 00:36:07,317 Congratulations, Bartowski. That's quite an achievement. 552 00:36:09,320 --> 00:36:10,878 And in light of today's events... 553 00:36:11,040 --> 00:36:13,873 ...I'd like to announce there's a new assistant manager. 554 00:36:14,040 --> 00:36:15,837 What did I tell you? It's all coming up. 555 00:36:16,000 --> 00:36:18,798 You all remember Mr. Emmett Milbarge. 556 00:36:18,960 --> 00:36:22,396 Mr. Milbarge has volunteered to stay on for... 557 00:36:22,560 --> 00:36:23,754 ...well, as long as it takes. 558 00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:26,828 That's right, Michael. 559 00:36:27,000 --> 00:36:28,797 I'm afraid this branch is sick. 560 00:36:28,960 --> 00:36:31,872 Not the kind of sick that can be fixed with a Band-Aid. 561 00:36:32,040 --> 00:36:34,634 What this Buy More needs requires a surgeon. 562 00:36:34,800 --> 00:36:37,439 Someone who doesn't mind getting up to their elbows in guts. 563 00:36:37,600 --> 00:36:39,192 - Hmm. - Ha-ha-ha. 564 00:36:39,360 --> 00:36:41,430 And that's exactly what I'm gonna do. 565 00:36:42,400 --> 00:36:46,837 I'm gonna reach in, wrap my fingers around the disease... 566 00:36:47,000 --> 00:36:50,117 ...and rip it out. 567 00:37:01,680 --> 00:37:03,318 How you feeling, buddy? 568 00:37:03,480 --> 00:37:04,469 Better. 569 00:37:04,640 --> 00:37:06,710 - Good. - Thanks. 570 00:37:08,920 --> 00:37:11,832 So "Missile Command" champion. 571 00:37:13,320 --> 00:37:16,039 I got lucky, you know. 572 00:37:18,320 --> 00:37:20,072 Congrats. 573 00:37:21,600 --> 00:37:23,318 I'm glad it was you. 574 00:37:26,480 --> 00:37:28,550 - I mean, you sure you're not...? - Me? Ha, ha. 575 00:37:28,720 --> 00:37:30,119 I'm cool. 576 00:37:30,280 --> 00:37:32,396 Being number one's a real bitch. 577 00:37:33,000 --> 00:37:35,594 It feels like the whole world is gunning for you sometimes. 578 00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:39,352 I can imagine. 579 00:37:43,360 --> 00:37:45,476 So, what was it like? 580 00:37:45,640 --> 00:37:46,993 The kill screen? 581 00:37:49,640 --> 00:37:52,438 Forget it. Uh... 582 00:37:52,680 --> 00:37:54,033 I'll see you tomorrow. 583 00:38:04,960 --> 00:38:06,712 Oh, I am so proud of you. 584 00:38:06,880 --> 00:38:09,075 Ha, ha. Hey, relax. It's just a video game. 585 00:38:09,240 --> 00:38:11,674 Granted, I am the best missile commander in the world. 586 00:38:11,840 --> 00:38:14,832 I'm not talking about a stupid game. I'm talking about this. 587 00:38:15,000 --> 00:38:17,070 Sarah told us what's inside. 588 00:38:17,240 --> 00:38:18,514 Huh. 589 00:38:21,320 --> 00:38:22,355 My diploma? 590 00:38:23,520 --> 00:38:25,238 Oh, don't act so surprised. 591 00:38:25,400 --> 00:38:27,197 You sly dog. 592 00:38:27,360 --> 00:38:31,148 Sarah also told us about what you've been doing behind our backs. 593 00:38:31,320 --> 00:38:32,912 She did? Really? 594 00:38:33,080 --> 00:38:35,469 Yeah. No wonder you've been such a mess this past year. 595 00:38:35,640 --> 00:38:38,677 Why didn't you tell us you were taking online courses? 596 00:38:39,640 --> 00:38:43,155 Oh, oh, right. That's... 597 00:38:43,320 --> 00:38:46,357 You two have some celebrating to do. She's waiting out back. 598 00:38:46,520 --> 00:38:50,035 - You'll thank me for that ginseng shake. - You really surprised me, Charles. 599 00:38:58,160 --> 00:39:00,310 Well, thanks for my fake diploma. 600 00:39:00,480 --> 00:39:01,708 What do you mean? 601 00:39:01,880 --> 00:39:05,555 I get it. You had one of your CIA pals doctor it up to get Ellie off my back. 602 00:39:05,960 --> 00:39:06,949 It's real, Chuck. 603 00:39:08,280 --> 00:39:10,157 - Come on. - I'm serious, you graduated. 604 00:39:10,320 --> 00:39:11,833 What about my last 12 credits? 605 00:39:12,000 --> 00:39:14,560 Casey and I decided that your exceptional field service... 606 00:39:14,720 --> 00:39:18,156 ...ought to count for something, and Stanford agreed. 607 00:39:18,320 --> 00:39:22,757 Huh, and by "exceptional," you mean, like, uh, I don't know... 608 00:39:22,920 --> 00:39:25,878 ...decrypting weapons-satellite codes? - Electrical engineering. 609 00:39:26,040 --> 00:39:28,315 Running away from exploding games of "Missile Command"? 610 00:39:28,480 --> 00:39:29,595 Physical education. 611 00:39:30,680 --> 00:39:31,999 You earned it, Chuck. 612 00:39:40,080 --> 00:39:41,069 Thank you. 613 00:39:44,200 --> 00:39:46,077 You see that star out there on the horizon? 614 00:39:49,200 --> 00:39:50,189 That's the Air Force... 615 00:39:50,360 --> 00:39:54,239 ...bouncing Morimoto's satellite off the atmosphere and burning it up. 616 00:39:54,840 --> 00:39:55,829 Make a wish. 617 00:39:56,280 --> 00:39:57,349 It's yours. 618 00:40:27,680 --> 00:40:28,999 Hey, bud. 619 00:40:29,160 --> 00:40:30,195 Let's party.