1
00:00:57,141 --> 00:00:59,058
Sweetheart, remember that
you're doing pickup today
2
00:00:59,143 --> 00:01:00,893
and you need to
call the face painter
for the party.
3
00:01:00,978 --> 00:01:02,228
And Henry
needs more Lactaid.
4
00:01:02,312 --> 00:01:03,438
All right. Got it.
5
00:01:03,522 --> 00:01:06,065
Pick up the kids,
call the face painter,
get Lactaid. I got it.
6
00:01:06,191 --> 00:01:07,316
Also, I'm gonna drop
by the new house
7
00:01:07,401 --> 00:01:08,401
and see how
the work's coming.
8
00:01:08,485 --> 00:01:09,569
Okay, awesome.
9
00:01:09,653 --> 00:01:10,737
Can you make sure
that you measure
10
00:01:10,821 --> 00:01:11,946
the backyard for
the bouncy castle?
11
00:01:12,030 --> 00:01:13,990
We're gonna have
a bouncy castle
at our birthday party?
12
00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:15,366
Do you want a bouncy castle?
Yeah.
13
00:01:15,492 --> 00:01:17,744
Then, yes, we'll have
the best bouncy castle
in the whole world!
14
00:01:17,828 --> 00:01:19,620
Bouncy castle!
Bouncy castle!
Bouncy castle...
15
00:01:19,705 --> 00:01:21,456
And an Ultimate
Fighting Octagon?
16
00:01:21,665 --> 00:01:22,915
I don't know
about that.
17
00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:24,292
But, hey, you talked to me!
18
00:01:24,376 --> 00:01:26,419
I was talking to Mommy.
19
00:01:26,795 --> 00:01:28,463
Okay, but just now,
you talked to me
by saying that.
20
00:01:28,547 --> 00:01:29,672
Why does she have
such a problem?
21
00:01:29,757 --> 00:01:30,798
It's just a phase.
Don't push it.
22
00:01:30,883 --> 00:01:32,425
PAM: Hey, sweetheart,
it hurts Daddy's feelings
23
00:01:32,509 --> 00:01:34,010
when you give him
the silent treatment.
24
00:01:34,303 --> 00:01:37,263
I'm ready for school,
I'm ready for school!
Pick me up, pick me up!
25
00:01:37,347 --> 00:01:38,598
All right. Hey, Henry,
26
00:01:38,682 --> 00:01:40,099
you know
you can't bring
Arthur to school.
27
00:01:40,184 --> 00:01:41,601
But he's my best friend.
28
00:01:41,685 --> 00:01:42,810
Honey, he's your
best lizard friend.
29
00:01:42,895 --> 00:01:44,687
You've got lots of
non-lizard friends.
30
00:01:44,855 --> 00:01:45,855
Not really.
31
00:01:46,648 --> 00:01:47,607
Really?
32
00:01:47,691 --> 00:01:48,691
Nope.
33
00:01:48,709 --> 00:01:50,234
All right,
have a good day.
I love you.
34
00:01:50,319 --> 00:01:51,402
You're kidding me!
35
00:01:51,487 --> 00:01:53,488
You can't take that
to school, monkey.
Go put that in your room.
36
00:01:53,822 --> 00:01:55,114
Sam, I will see you.
I love you.
37
00:01:56,283 --> 00:01:57,450
Sam.
Hey.
38
00:01:57,534 --> 00:01:59,035
What? Yeah,
oh, golly, okay.
See you.
39
00:01:59,703 --> 00:02:01,454
Thanks. Love you.
40
00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:09,378
There he is!
41
00:02:10,672 --> 00:02:13,466
Hey, Randy. How you doing?
42
00:02:13,550 --> 00:02:14,550
Gregory Focker!
43
00:02:14,635 --> 00:02:15,802
How's it going?
44
00:02:15,928 --> 00:02:17,428
Wonderful to see you.
Great to see you.
45
00:02:17,513 --> 00:02:19,972
Listen, I just
came by to check out
the backyard and measure
46
00:02:20,057 --> 00:02:22,433
'cause we want to do
a bouncy castle for
the kids' birthday party.
47
00:02:22,559 --> 00:02:23,851
Aw.
48
00:02:23,936 --> 00:02:25,686
That's terrific, Gregory.
49
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:41,410
Okay, you're about
five minutes late.
50
00:02:41,495 --> 00:02:42,662
Yeah, I know.
51
00:02:42,746 --> 00:02:45,039
A Miss Denslow
from the administrative
board called.
52
00:02:45,123 --> 00:02:47,041
She wants to get a list
of the budget cuts.
53
00:02:47,125 --> 00:02:49,126
You have a meeting
in 20 minutes
with John Raider
54
00:02:49,211 --> 00:02:53,089
and some drug rep
from Pfosten Pharmaceuticals
55
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:54,966
is waiting in your office.
Andi something.
56
00:02:55,050 --> 00:02:56,092
There's a drug rep in there?
57
00:02:56,176 --> 00:02:57,176
Mmm-hmm.
58
00:02:57,261 --> 00:02:58,678
Okay, look,
in three minutes,
59
00:02:58,762 --> 00:03:00,680
pop your head in
and tell me I have to
go to my next meeting.
60
00:03:00,764 --> 00:03:01,764
Okay.
All right?
61
00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:05,643
Sorry, I got to
make this really quick.
I got a very busy morning.
62
00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:09,897
I understand,
Nurse Focker.
I'm Andi Garcia.
63
00:03:09,982 --> 00:03:10,982
Hi.
64
00:03:11,441 --> 00:03:13,442
You have a lot less
stubble in person.
65
00:03:16,029 --> 00:03:18,114
I'm... There's an actor
named Andy Garcia.
66
00:03:18,448 --> 00:03:19,448
Who?
67
00:03:20,534 --> 00:03:22,410
Widow's peak.
Sort of tough guy.
68
00:03:22,786 --> 00:03:26,414
I was just kidding.
Of course, I know
who Andy Garcia is.
69
00:03:26,498 --> 00:03:27,540
I get that all the time.
70
00:03:27,624 --> 00:03:29,125
Yeah. You must
get it all the time
71
00:03:29,209 --> 00:03:30,668
'cause you're named
Andi Garcia.
72
00:03:30,752 --> 00:03:33,796
I loved the article
you wrote in the
AMA Journal,
73
00:03:33,881 --> 00:03:35,381
"Putting Patients First."
74
00:03:35,632 --> 00:03:37,091
You read that?
I loved it.
75
00:03:37,384 --> 00:03:40,887
It was so cool getting
a nurse's perspective
on the health care crisis.
76
00:03:40,971 --> 00:03:42,388
Yeah, that was the idea.
77
00:03:42,472 --> 00:03:44,807
I actually started out
as a nurse, myself.
78
00:03:45,017 --> 00:03:47,310
Really? Well, nowadays,
I do less nursing and more...
79
00:03:47,477 --> 00:03:49,812
Annoying meetings
with drug reps you'd rather
not deal with?
80
00:03:50,731 --> 00:03:52,648
Hey, Greg, it's time
for your next meeting.
81
00:03:52,900 --> 00:03:54,317
That's okay,
I'm fine, Kristen.
Thank you.
82
00:03:54,401 --> 00:03:55,568
Yeah, but he doesn't
like to wait.
83
00:03:55,652 --> 00:03:56,944
You know
how he is, you know.
84
00:03:57,029 --> 00:03:58,279
Well, it's John Raider?
85
00:03:58,363 --> 00:03:59,572
Yeah, he's really picky...
86
00:03:59,656 --> 00:04:01,824
He always runs late.
Always runs late. Thanks.
87
00:04:02,618 --> 00:04:04,493
ANDI: You're swamped.
No, I'm good.
You want to have a seat?
88
00:04:04,786 --> 00:04:05,786
Yeah.
Okay.
89
00:04:05,871 --> 00:04:07,204
I'll make this quick.
90
00:04:07,289 --> 00:04:10,541
So we are launching
a killer new product
at Pfosten
91
00:04:10,626 --> 00:04:15,546
and, while we usually
hire doctors to lead
our presentations,
92
00:04:15,631 --> 00:04:16,923
I have a feeling about you.
93
00:04:17,341 --> 00:04:21,385
I think you have the potential
to be a medical superstar.
94
00:04:22,054 --> 00:04:27,516
And you'd be perfect
to represent
our new drug, Sustengo.
95
00:04:28,518 --> 00:04:33,397
Sustengo. All right.
It's an erectile
dysfunction medicine.
96
00:04:33,482 --> 00:04:36,025
It's not just any erectile
dysfunction medicine.
97
00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:39,737
It's the first ED pill
on the market
safe for heart patients.
98
00:04:40,322 --> 00:04:44,450
Because, in addition
to increasing the penile
blood flow...
99
00:04:44,534 --> 00:04:45,952
See that penis?
100
00:04:46,036 --> 00:04:47,787
It acts as
a beta blocker
101
00:04:47,871 --> 00:04:51,248
to keep the heart rate down
during intercourse.
102
00:04:51,333 --> 00:04:52,708
I mean, how dope is that?
103
00:04:53,877 --> 00:04:54,886
That's pretty dope.
104
00:04:54,970 --> 00:04:57,029
WOMAN ON PA:
Nurse Focker needed
in room 220 B, stat.
105
00:04:57,113 --> 00:04:58,965
I'm sorry,
hang on one second.
106
00:04:59,049 --> 00:05:01,175
Nurse Focker, room 220 B.
107
00:05:01,343 --> 00:05:02,551
ANDROVSKY:
Will you get out of my ass?
108
00:05:02,803 --> 00:05:04,011
If you would stop
squirming around...
109
00:05:04,096 --> 00:05:05,429
But you don't know
what you're doing.
110
00:05:05,514 --> 00:05:07,181
It could have
been over, sir.
Hey, hey, hey,
111
00:05:07,265 --> 00:05:09,141
how you doing there,
Mr. Androvsky?
Everything okay?
112
00:05:09,226 --> 00:05:10,518
Well, this nurse
is a barbarian.
113
00:05:10,602 --> 00:05:11,727
Okay, I'm not a barbarian.
114
00:05:11,812 --> 00:05:13,387
He keeps clenching
and I can't make an insertion.
115
00:05:13,471 --> 00:05:14,438
Louis, it's...
116
00:05:14,439 --> 00:05:15,964
It's a natural response
to protect that cavity.
117
00:05:15,965 --> 00:05:17,341
You're right,
it is a natural response.
118
00:05:17,342 --> 00:05:19,201
I would protect
my cavity, too.
119
00:05:19,210 --> 00:05:20,885
And we just got to do it
a little bit gentler.
120
00:05:20,886 --> 00:05:22,328
May I suggest something?
121
00:05:22,823 --> 00:05:25,116
Sir, why don't you
extend your left leg
122
00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:27,451
and put your right knee
right up to your chest.
123
00:05:27,536 --> 00:05:30,162
It'll help relax
things down there.
124
00:05:30,247 --> 00:05:31,497
She's right.
125
00:05:31,581 --> 00:05:34,083
You just do that
and you just grab the side
of the bed there, like that,
126
00:05:34,167 --> 00:05:35,334
and exhale...
There you go.
127
00:05:35,419 --> 00:05:37,461
Nurse, did you sufficiently
lubricate the nozzle?
128
00:05:37,671 --> 00:05:38,963
I did do that.
Great.
129
00:05:39,047 --> 00:05:40,631
Good, good, okay.
You got this?
130
00:05:40,716 --> 00:05:41,966
Yep.
131
00:05:42,050 --> 00:05:43,801
GREG: All right.
Take a nice deep breath.
132
00:05:45,595 --> 00:05:50,349
And focus
on relaxing your anus.
133
00:05:50,434 --> 00:05:53,519
Right. That's right.
You just want
to let it dilate,
134
00:05:53,603 --> 00:05:56,605
sort of like
a flower opening up.
135
00:05:56,940 --> 00:05:58,315
Blossoming lotus.
136
00:05:59,026 --> 00:06:01,193
Sort of like
a desert cactus.
137
00:06:01,528 --> 00:06:02,528
Maturing.
138
00:06:02,612 --> 00:06:03,696
It's okay.
139
00:06:03,780 --> 00:06:07,366
Just a little,
friendly visitor
just saying hello.
140
00:06:08,326 --> 00:06:10,578
All right, I'm just gonna
stick it in a little further.
141
00:06:12,789 --> 00:06:14,290
Good smooth insertion.
142
00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:15,708
Thank you.
143
00:06:15,792 --> 00:06:19,628
I'm gonna release the clamp.
And let it flow.
144
00:06:19,963 --> 00:06:21,338
Better.
145
00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:23,049
How's that?
146
00:06:23,133 --> 00:06:24,133
That was great.
147
00:06:28,305 --> 00:06:29,847
Nice technique.
148
00:06:29,931 --> 00:06:31,432
That was so fun.
149
00:06:31,683 --> 00:06:33,601
Yeah, yeah.
150
00:06:33,685 --> 00:06:36,228
I was thinking about it
and, honestly,
151
00:06:36,313 --> 00:06:39,065
I just don't have time
to moonlight pitching
a drug right now.
152
00:06:39,149 --> 00:06:40,399
Shot down.
153
00:06:40,609 --> 00:06:42,109
No, it's not you.
It's just...
154
00:06:42,194 --> 00:06:44,236
No, I get it, you know.
155
00:06:44,321 --> 00:06:46,697
Running nursing
in med-surge is a big job.
156
00:06:46,990 --> 00:06:48,407
Yeah, yeah, so big,
157
00:06:48,492 --> 00:06:50,242
I'm making less than I did
when I was in the ER.
158
00:06:50,327 --> 00:06:52,912
Look, we are sponsoring
a convention at the Hilton.
159
00:06:52,996 --> 00:06:53,996
Mmm-hmm.
160
00:06:54,081 --> 00:06:57,875
You can make tons of dough
for, like, one speech.
161
00:06:57,959 --> 00:06:58,959
Think about it.
162
00:06:59,961 --> 00:07:01,670
Okay. I will,
I'll think about it.
Okay.
163
00:07:02,005 --> 00:07:03,297
Knuckles?
164
00:07:03,381 --> 00:07:04,381
Knuckles.
165
00:07:04,466 --> 00:07:06,592
That was bad-ass,
by the way.
166
00:07:06,676 --> 00:07:08,761
Yeah. Literally.
167
00:07:39,876 --> 00:07:41,377
JACK: Dr. Bob.
168
00:07:42,546 --> 00:07:44,004
Scumbag.
169
00:07:45,549 --> 00:07:47,967
DINA: Jack, my taxi's here.
170
00:07:49,094 --> 00:07:51,011
Honey,
I just got off with Deb.
171
00:07:51,096 --> 00:07:53,180
They are
officially separated.
172
00:07:53,265 --> 00:07:55,474
Dr. Bob finished moving out.
173
00:07:55,559 --> 00:07:57,184
That lowlife.
174
00:07:57,269 --> 00:07:58,578
Yeah. You can
say that again.
175
00:07:58,662 --> 00:08:00,287
You sure you don't want me
to come with you?
176
00:08:00,372 --> 00:08:01,605
No, you know,
I think Deb needs
177
00:08:01,690 --> 00:08:03,065
a little mother-daughter
time, honey.
178
00:08:03,150 --> 00:08:04,150
All right?
179
00:08:04,442 --> 00:08:05,651
Having an affair
with a nurse.
180
00:08:05,735 --> 00:08:07,319
I can't believe
I didn't see
the warning signs.
181
00:08:07,404 --> 00:08:08,821
He was very discreet.
182
00:08:08,905 --> 00:08:12,283
She didn't even know
until she saw
those text messages.
183
00:08:12,367 --> 00:08:13,325
Whatever you call them.
184
00:08:13,410 --> 00:08:15,411
Yeah, but I'm trained
to detect that sort
of behavior, honey,
185
00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:17,913
and the truth is
I was so busy putting
Focker through the wringer,
186
00:08:17,998 --> 00:08:19,665
Dr. Bob slipped
right under my radar.
187
00:08:19,749 --> 00:08:21,417
Don't be
so hard on yourself.
188
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:24,753
Well, I'll never
let that happen again.
189
00:08:26,631 --> 00:08:29,341
Are you having one of
your little heart palpies
again, Jack?
190
00:08:29,426 --> 00:08:31,719
My muscles are
a little tight!
191
00:08:31,803 --> 00:08:33,179
Yeah, yeah.
From stress.
192
00:08:33,263 --> 00:08:37,349
I can see that.
Okay, will you just,
please, just relax, okay?
193
00:08:37,434 --> 00:08:39,685
Everything is gonna be
all right. Honest.
194
00:08:41,021 --> 00:08:42,897
I got to go.
Okay.
195
00:08:42,981 --> 00:08:44,273
I'm gonna miss you.
196
00:08:52,490 --> 00:08:53,490
Hey, Mom.
197
00:08:53,617 --> 00:08:56,702
Hello, my precious prince,
how are you, darling?
198
00:08:56,786 --> 00:08:58,287
Good. How's the TV show going?
199
00:08:58,496 --> 00:09:01,707
Great.
You know what this
week's episode is about?
200
00:09:01,791 --> 00:09:05,085
Using the latest sexual toys
to spice up your love life.
201
00:09:05,170 --> 00:09:06,170
Really?
Yeah.
202
00:09:06,254 --> 00:09:07,588
As an early Hanukkah present,
203
00:09:07,672 --> 00:09:10,257
I'm gonna
send you and Pam a box
of these musical condoms.
204
00:09:10,717 --> 00:09:11,717
Don't do that.
205
00:09:11,801 --> 00:09:14,595
You got to hear this, honey.
There's a little
speaker inside.
206
00:09:14,679 --> 00:09:17,348
And the faster you go,
the louder it gets.
207
00:09:17,599 --> 00:09:20,309
You know what?
Mom, Pam and I are fine.
We don't need musical condoms.
208
00:09:20,644 --> 00:09:23,229
Honey, every couple can use
a little stimulation.
209
00:09:23,438 --> 00:09:25,356
By the way,
interesting episode last week.
210
00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:27,066
Which one? "Masturbation
Through The Ages"?
211
00:09:27,150 --> 00:09:28,317
I thought we agreed
you weren't gonna
212
00:09:28,401 --> 00:09:29,526
talk about me
on the air anymore.
213
00:09:29,611 --> 00:09:32,780
Please, it was just
a little anecdote about
carpal tunnel syndrome
214
00:09:32,864 --> 00:09:34,782
from excessive
self-pleasuring.
215
00:09:35,033 --> 00:09:36,951
l have to connect
your father now, okay?
216
00:09:37,327 --> 00:09:38,869
We need to
tell you something.
217
00:09:44,125 --> 00:09:45,125
Ooh.
218
00:09:48,380 --> 00:09:50,422
Hi! Gay? Roz?
219
00:09:50,674 --> 00:09:51,715
Hello?
Yeah, I'm here.
220
00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:52,841
Gaylord?
Dad?
221
00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:53,926
Can you hear me?
Where are you?
222
00:09:54,010 --> 00:09:55,803
You won't believe it.
I'm in Seville, Spain.
223
00:09:56,012 --> 00:09:57,179
Where... What are
you doing in Spain?
224
00:09:58,014 --> 00:09:59,056
I'm studying.
225
00:09:59,140 --> 00:10:01,267
ROZ: Sweetheart,
your father decided that
226
00:10:01,351 --> 00:10:02,893
he's not gonna make
it to the twins' party.
227
00:10:02,978 --> 00:10:03,936
What?
228
00:10:04,020 --> 00:10:05,354
Gay, you remember
when your mother's show
229
00:10:05,438 --> 00:10:06,605
hit number one
in the ratings
230
00:10:06,690 --> 00:10:08,232
and she signed on
for a second year?
231
00:10:08,316 --> 00:10:10,859
I looked in the mirror
and I said, "Who am I?"
232
00:10:11,194 --> 00:10:12,903
Then I see this
clip on the YouTube
233
00:10:12,988 --> 00:10:15,823
and there is a Spanish guy
and he's dancing the flamenco.
234
00:10:15,907 --> 00:10:17,992
And the sweat is
pouring off of his face
235
00:10:18,076 --> 00:10:19,827
and there is such
passion in his eyes
236
00:10:19,911 --> 00:10:21,704
and l said, "That's it!"
That's what?
237
00:10:22,038 --> 00:10:25,624
That's me. I am flamenco!
I will master this art.
238
00:10:25,709 --> 00:10:27,751
Dad, this is crazy.
What are you doing?
You're in Spain?
239
00:10:27,836 --> 00:10:28,961
You're gonna miss the party?
240
00:10:29,045 --> 00:10:31,547
You picked a hell of a time
to go through man-opause.
241
00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:33,424
Roz, I am not going
through man-opause,
242
00:10:33,508 --> 00:10:35,217
I'm just trying to find
my true north.
243
00:10:35,385 --> 00:10:37,386
True north, huh?
What are you,
a compass or something?
244
00:10:37,554 --> 00:10:38,554
No, but let's face it.
245
00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:39,805
I'm a stay-at-home dad
246
00:10:39,889 --> 00:10:41,974
whose kid hasn't lived
at home in 25 years.
247
00:10:42,058 --> 00:10:44,768
There's an Arthur Murray
studio right here
in Miami Beach.
248
00:10:44,853 --> 00:10:46,395
Why schlep
all the way to Spain?
249
00:10:46,563 --> 00:10:47,730
I can't believe you, Roz.
250
00:10:47,897 --> 00:10:49,315
Why can't you
support my dreams
251
00:10:49,399 --> 00:10:50,816
the way I have
always supported yours?
252
00:10:50,900 --> 00:10:52,359
Guys, guys...
BERNIE: When you
wanted to try
253
00:10:52,444 --> 00:10:55,571
new sex positions
for your research,
I was your guinea pig!
254
00:10:55,780 --> 00:10:56,780
You volunteered.
255
00:10:56,865 --> 00:10:58,324
BERNIE: l pulled
my hamstring...
Hey! Hey!
256
00:10:58,408 --> 00:10:59,616
...doing a reverse cowgirl!
257
00:10:59,743 --> 00:11:01,076
That's because
you did it backwards.
258
00:11:01,328 --> 00:11:02,578
I never went soft on you.
259
00:11:02,587 --> 00:11:04,488
ROZ: Bernie, do you hear
how you're upsetting your son?
260
00:11:04,572 --> 00:11:06,406
BERNIE: Let me talk.
Listen, will you?
261
00:11:09,544 --> 00:11:11,378
That son of a bitch.
262
00:11:26,644 --> 00:11:28,244
Shit.
263
00:11:40,075 --> 00:11:41,700
Hello?
OPERATOR: 91 1,
what's your emergency?
264
00:11:41,785 --> 00:11:44,328
Yeah, my name is Jack Byrnes.
I live at 28
Cherry Blossom Lane.
265
00:11:44,412 --> 00:11:45,704
I'm going into cardiac arrest.
266
00:11:45,789 --> 00:11:47,581
I need an ambulance
right away.
267
00:11:47,665 --> 00:11:49,333
I'm guessing your average
response time at this hour
268
00:11:49,417 --> 00:11:51,043
is between 1 2 and 1 7 minutes.
269
00:11:51,127 --> 00:11:53,462
I need you to do
better than that.
Thank you, goodbye.
270
00:12:03,681 --> 00:12:06,225
Stay calm, Mr. Jinx.
I'm going to
defibrillate myself.
271
00:12:07,310 --> 00:12:08,310
Clear!
272
00:12:10,939 --> 00:12:13,065
Seriously, though,
my dad, he always
sounds a little crazy,
273
00:12:13,149 --> 00:12:14,691
but this was like
a whole different level.
274
00:12:15,151 --> 00:12:17,069
No, I mean they were
really going at it.
Really?
275
00:12:17,153 --> 00:12:18,737
She accused him of
going through man-opause.
276
00:12:20,115 --> 00:12:21,115
Is that a real thing?
277
00:12:21,182 --> 00:12:22,883
Your parents have
the best marriage
of anyone I know.
278
00:12:22,899 --> 00:12:23,899
They will be fine.
279
00:12:24,285 --> 00:12:25,744
Yeah, I guess so.
280
00:12:26,079 --> 00:12:27,079
You were talking
about the kids.
281
00:12:27,163 --> 00:12:29,248
Really, their teacher
suggested private school?
282
00:12:29,332 --> 00:12:31,750
Yeah, she said
she was concerned
about them "getting lost"
283
00:12:31,835 --> 00:12:33,335
in the public school
system or something.
284
00:12:33,545 --> 00:12:35,003
What's the name
of this place?
285
00:12:36,131 --> 00:12:37,589
The Early Human School.
286
00:12:38,174 --> 00:12:40,092
I have absolutely
heard of that place.
287
00:12:40,593 --> 00:12:42,177
Sounds like a school
for Neanderthals.
288
00:12:42,345 --> 00:12:45,514
No, it's actually considered
the Harvard of kindergartens.
289
00:12:45,723 --> 00:12:47,349
Mmm. Well, I think
Harvard's cheaper.
290
00:12:48,685 --> 00:12:49,685
I'll go see who that is.
291
00:12:49,894 --> 00:12:53,188
Hey, greetings
from the Black Sea.
You look terrific.
292
00:12:53,398 --> 00:12:56,024
Hi, stranger, thanks.
What are you doing there?
293
00:12:56,109 --> 00:12:59,069
Listen, Pam.
ls there any way
l could speak to Greg?
294
00:12:59,154 --> 00:13:01,488
l want to get his advice
on something,
believe it or not.
295
00:13:01,573 --> 00:13:02,614
Sure, absolutely. Hey, Greg?
296
00:13:02,699 --> 00:13:03,699
GREG: Yeah.
297
00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:05,784
Greg, honey,
it's your buddy, Kevin.
298
00:13:05,869 --> 00:13:07,119
Hold on.
Thank you.
299
00:13:07,412 --> 00:13:08,787
Hey.
Hey.
300
00:13:08,872 --> 00:13:09,913
How you doing, man?
301
00:13:10,206 --> 00:13:11,999
l was just doing
a little sailing
302
00:13:12,083 --> 00:13:14,209
and living the dream,
G-Diggity-Dog.
303
00:13:14,419 --> 00:13:15,419
Cheers!
Kevin.
304
00:13:15,503 --> 00:13:17,171
Hey.
You need a refill on that
305
00:13:17,255 --> 00:13:18,630
goji berry smoothie?
306
00:13:18,882 --> 00:13:21,175
You read my mind.
Fill her up, Pak-Man.
307
00:13:21,426 --> 00:13:23,135
Greg, you know
Deepak Chopra, right?
308
00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:24,720
I know of him.
309
00:13:24,929 --> 00:13:26,847
Hi, Greg.
Hi, Mr. Chopra.
310
00:13:27,015 --> 00:13:28,557
Dr. Chopra.
311
00:13:29,142 --> 00:13:30,976
KEVIN: Get out of here,
you rascal.
312
00:13:31,561 --> 00:13:36,190
So, listen, the reason
why l'm calling is
because next week...
313
00:13:36,274 --> 00:13:38,192
Kevin, who do
you Skype with?
314
00:13:38,276 --> 00:13:40,986
l am just talking
to my friend, Greg Focker.
315
00:13:41,571 --> 00:13:42,821
Hey.
KEVIN: Come here.
316
00:13:46,034 --> 00:13:47,826
Hey, honey,
what'd you do with
Henry's Lactaid?
317
00:13:49,037 --> 00:13:50,787
Crap, I forgot. Sorry.
318
00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:52,414
Well, okay.
But did you call
the face-paint lady?
319
00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:54,625
No, I'm sorry.
320
00:13:54,709 --> 00:13:56,460
I had, like,
97 things to do, so...
321
00:13:56,544 --> 00:13:59,338
Honey, I asked you
to do two things,
that's all I asked.
322
00:13:59,422 --> 00:14:00,881
I know. Sorry, babe.
323
00:14:04,928 --> 00:14:07,513
Okay, so here's the dealio.
324
00:14:07,597 --> 00:14:09,932
l'm going to propose
to Svetlana.
325
00:14:10,517 --> 00:14:13,060
You're gonna propose?
That's incredible.
326
00:14:13,144 --> 00:14:16,522
l'm gonna have three Russian
MiG fighter jets fly by
327
00:14:16,606 --> 00:14:18,941
and skywrite
"Marry me, Svetlana."
328
00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:24,029
And then l'm gonna hide
a 50-carat super-tasteful
diamond ring
329
00:14:24,113 --> 00:14:26,365
in this tin of
extremely rare beluga.
330
00:14:26,449 --> 00:14:28,909
Then we will
finish the night
331
00:14:28,993 --> 00:14:31,870
with a special performance
that l choreographed
332
00:14:31,955 --> 00:14:35,457
with members of
the Bolshoi Ballet,
dedicated to our love.
333
00:14:35,542 --> 00:14:36,625
Thoughts?
334
00:14:37,293 --> 00:14:39,336
Honestly, I'm thinking
maybe it's a little
too involved.
335
00:14:39,546 --> 00:14:40,546
Yeah?
336
00:14:40,630 --> 00:14:42,673
I mean, with Pam,
my whole thing was just
337
00:14:42,757 --> 00:14:44,967
keep it simple,
speak from the heart.
338
00:14:45,969 --> 00:14:50,889
Keep it simple
and speak from the heart.
l like it, hombre.
339
00:14:50,974 --> 00:14:54,309
You know what?
l'd better call off some
Russian MiG fighter jets.
340
00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:57,312
And, hey, by the time
l get to Chi-town,
341
00:14:57,397 --> 00:15:00,232
this old dog here
could be an engaged man.
342
00:15:01,484 --> 00:15:02,734
Hey, Kevin?
Yeah.
343
00:15:02,819 --> 00:15:03,777
The jet skis are ready!
344
00:15:03,861 --> 00:15:04,861
The jet skis are ready?
345
00:15:04,946 --> 00:15:06,572
Well, fire 'em up for me.
Okay.
346
00:15:06,656 --> 00:15:08,448
l'll be right there.
347
00:15:08,866 --> 00:15:10,200
Jet-skiing monks.
348
00:15:11,286 --> 00:15:14,913
Wow, I cannot believe
that Kevin is
finally settling down.
349
00:15:14,998 --> 00:15:16,373
Well, I think
he's found a soul mate.
350
00:15:16,457 --> 00:15:17,457
Yeah?
351
00:15:17,542 --> 00:15:19,876
Hey, you're gonna
eat some of this.
She seemed nice.
352
00:15:20,378 --> 00:15:22,796
Yeah. I am very happy
for Kevin.
353
00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:25,007
I love him,
especially when he's
not obsessed with you.
354
00:15:25,341 --> 00:15:27,009
Come on.
You're being ridiculous.
355
00:15:27,468 --> 00:15:29,011
PAM: You got it?
356
00:15:29,178 --> 00:15:30,387
Hey, sweetheart,
will you please
357
00:15:30,471 --> 00:15:31,597
take a bite of
the lasagna, honey?
358
00:15:31,681 --> 00:15:33,765
HENRY: No. -uh.
Do you not like it?
359
00:15:34,142 --> 00:15:36,059
Hey, what's the good word,
Grandpa Jack?
360
00:15:36,519 --> 00:15:37,519
Yay!
361
00:15:37,645 --> 00:15:38,645
JACK: Greg.
362
00:15:38,855 --> 00:15:39,938
This is Jack Byrnes.
363
00:15:40,565 --> 00:15:43,066
Yeah, I know.
I could tell
from the caller ID.
364
00:15:43,318 --> 00:15:44,276
How are you doing?
365
00:15:44,360 --> 00:15:47,571
Greg, excuse yourself
from the table by saying
these exact words,
366
00:15:48,072 --> 00:15:50,991
"I don't know
if I still have it,
but let me check my files."
367
00:15:51,743 --> 00:15:53,368
What?
lf Pam asks you what l want,
368
00:15:53,578 --> 00:15:55,996
tell her that I
asked you to locate
your birth certificate
369
00:15:56,080 --> 00:15:57,414
for my genealogical work.
370
00:15:57,707 --> 00:15:59,041
Just do it.
371
00:16:00,877 --> 00:16:04,379
I don't know
if I have that, Jack,
but let me check my files.
372
00:16:05,048 --> 00:16:06,548
Files? You have files?
373
00:16:07,216 --> 00:16:10,969
Yes, yeah, I do.
I keep files.
374
00:16:11,054 --> 00:16:12,304
He wants me to get
my birth certificate
375
00:16:12,388 --> 00:16:14,264
for that family tree thing
he's doing.
376
00:16:15,725 --> 00:16:17,809
Jack? Everything okay?
377
00:16:18,102 --> 00:16:21,355
Everything is fine, Greg,
I suffered a minor
heart attack,
378
00:16:21,439 --> 00:16:23,231
but I was able to
defibrillate myself
379
00:16:23,316 --> 00:16:25,067
before going into
fatal cardiac arrest.
380
00:16:25,401 --> 00:16:27,486
Jesus!
You defibrillated yourself?
381
00:16:27,654 --> 00:16:28,945
The doctor said
I was a lucky man
382
00:16:29,030 --> 00:16:30,280
and I've just
got to watch my diet
383
00:16:30,365 --> 00:16:31,573
and keep my stress level down.
384
00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:34,451
Wow, okay, so I guess
385
00:16:34,535 --> 00:16:36,495
you guys aren't gonna be
able to come to
the twins' birthday party.
386
00:16:36,579 --> 00:16:38,955
No, Dina and l
will be there
as planned, Greg.
387
00:16:39,040 --> 00:16:42,668
And I was able to keep this
on a need-to-know basis.
388
00:16:42,752 --> 00:16:45,462
And right now,
you're the only person
who needs to know.
389
00:16:45,672 --> 00:16:48,674
Well, come on, Jack.
I mean, I think
Dina needs to know.
390
00:16:48,925 --> 00:16:50,175
Greg, stop talking and listen.
391
00:16:50,259 --> 00:16:51,426
Okay.
392
00:16:51,594 --> 00:16:54,680
Now, my genealogical
research has allowed me
to track the Byrnes family
393
00:16:54,764 --> 00:16:56,640
as far back as 1 643.
394
00:16:57,016 --> 00:16:58,266
1 643?
395
00:16:58,726 --> 00:17:01,061
Now, I wouldn't be
able to do that, say,
to your family,
396
00:17:01,145 --> 00:17:03,480
what with all
the wandering peddlers
and nameless peasants.
397
00:17:03,564 --> 00:17:04,564
Mmm-hmm.
398
00:17:04,649 --> 00:17:05,649
But, as long as there
have been Byrneses,
399
00:17:05,733 --> 00:17:07,025
there's always
been a patriarch
400
00:17:07,110 --> 00:17:09,111
to lead our family through
good times and bad.
401
00:17:09,195 --> 00:17:11,029
And I've finally
come to the realization
402
00:17:11,114 --> 00:17:14,366
that the next in line
to the throne, Greg,
403
00:17:14,450 --> 00:17:15,492
is you.
404
00:17:16,119 --> 00:17:17,119
Me.
405
00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:20,580
Yes, you, Greg.
406
00:17:21,374 --> 00:17:23,041
Well...
So my question is this,
407
00:17:23,584 --> 00:17:26,461
in the event of my demise,
are you prepared
to lead this family?
408
00:17:27,880 --> 00:17:29,965
You know, Jack,
we're right
in the middle of dinner.
409
00:17:30,049 --> 00:17:32,384
Maybe we could talk
about this, you know,
when you come into town.
410
00:17:32,844 --> 00:17:35,554
If I go down, Greg,
I need to know someone
will be responsible
411
00:17:35,638 --> 00:17:37,389
for the whole Byrnes clan.
412
00:17:37,473 --> 00:17:41,017
So I ask you, Greg,
are you prepared to be
413
00:17:42,645 --> 00:17:44,146
the Godfocker?
414
00:17:46,357 --> 00:17:48,024
The Godfocker?
415
00:17:48,526 --> 00:17:49,901
The Godfocker.
416
00:17:51,529 --> 00:17:55,240
Well, that is a very powerful
turn of phrase, Jack.
417
00:17:55,324 --> 00:17:59,911
And when you say Godfocker,
I mean...
418
00:17:59,996 --> 00:18:02,998
I mean, I think
I know what you mean,
but I'm just...
419
00:18:03,082 --> 00:18:05,709
What exactly does that mean?
420
00:18:06,169 --> 00:18:09,504
It's an attitude, Greg.
It's a confidence.
421
00:18:09,589 --> 00:18:10,756
It's the way
you carry yourself
422
00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:13,341
that lets the world
know that the buck
stops with you.
423
00:18:15,762 --> 00:18:17,137
Yeah, I hear you. Mmm-hmm.
424
00:18:17,472 --> 00:18:20,307
None of this can be achieved
without the basics.
425
00:18:20,391 --> 00:18:21,683
A secure home for your family,
426
00:18:22,518 --> 00:18:24,686
a top-notch education
for your children...
427
00:18:24,812 --> 00:18:25,812
Okay.
428
00:18:25,897 --> 00:18:28,690
...and last but not least,
having your financial
house in order, Greg.
429
00:18:28,775 --> 00:18:29,858
Is that it?
430
00:18:30,067 --> 00:18:31,359
Are you laughing?
431
00:18:31,444 --> 00:18:33,111
Yeah, no, I'm just...
I was making... No.
432
00:18:33,279 --> 00:18:34,780
Because this is no
laughing matter, Greg.
433
00:18:35,198 --> 00:18:37,407
Good, 'cause
I'm not laughing. Okay?
434
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:40,869
Are you saying
you have what it takes
to be the Godfocker?
435
00:18:42,789 --> 00:18:43,955
Greg?
436
00:18:45,500 --> 00:18:48,710
Yes, Jack.
I have what it takes
437
00:18:50,296 --> 00:18:52,214
to be the Godfocker.
438
00:18:53,841 --> 00:18:56,802
I feel like a great weight
has been lifted
off my shoulders.
439
00:18:57,553 --> 00:19:00,347
And an equally
great weight put onto yours.
440
00:19:00,848 --> 00:19:04,309
I like it.
I like the weight.
I want it.
441
00:19:05,269 --> 00:19:07,354
All right. Need-to-know.
442
00:19:07,438 --> 00:19:08,772
Need-to-know.
Just you and me.
443
00:19:08,856 --> 00:19:09,856
See you in two weeks.
444
00:19:09,941 --> 00:19:11,775
Okay. Bye.
445
00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:21,201
Hey, did you find it?
446
00:19:21,285 --> 00:19:22,953
Find what?
447
00:19:23,955 --> 00:19:24,955
Your birth certificate?
448
00:19:26,082 --> 00:19:27,666
Yes. It was in my files.
449
00:19:27,750 --> 00:19:28,750
Mmm.
450
00:19:29,627 --> 00:19:30,627
You know, I was thinking,
maybe we should
451
00:19:30,711 --> 00:19:32,921
take a look at that
Early Human School.
452
00:19:33,631 --> 00:19:36,132
Great. I'll make
some phone calls
and set up a tour.
453
00:19:36,592 --> 00:19:38,260
Good.
Good.
454
00:19:40,012 --> 00:19:41,012
Samantha.
455
00:19:44,976 --> 00:19:45,976
Henry.
456
00:19:47,436 --> 00:19:48,603
You gonna have your lasagna?
457
00:19:49,105 --> 00:19:50,397
No, thank you.
458
00:19:54,443 --> 00:19:57,779
You know,
your mother worked very hard
making that lasagna for you.
459
00:19:58,281 --> 00:19:59,865
No. It tastes funny.
460
00:20:00,575 --> 00:20:02,951
He said he was feeling
kind of queasy, so...
461
00:20:03,619 --> 00:20:04,619
It's okay.
462
00:20:06,789 --> 00:20:08,081
Henry,
463
00:20:08,165 --> 00:20:12,252
I'm your father
and I'm requesting of you
to eat the lasagna.
464
00:20:14,505 --> 00:20:15,797
Fine.
465
00:20:17,466 --> 00:20:18,717
Good.
466
00:20:36,277 --> 00:20:38,153
Hello.
GREG: Hello?
467
00:20:38,237 --> 00:20:39,946
Greg? This is Jack Byrnes.
468
00:20:40,031 --> 00:20:41,990
Jack Byrnes,
this is Greg Focker.
469
00:20:42,074 --> 00:20:43,742
I know, Greg. I called you.
470
00:20:44,118 --> 00:20:47,120
Dina and I will be there
in approximately 1 8 seconds.
471
00:20:47,204 --> 00:20:48,622
Eighteen seconds, got it.
472
00:21:02,553 --> 00:21:04,471
No,
that's yours, honey.
473
00:21:04,555 --> 00:21:05,889
Welcome, in-laws!
474
00:21:06,140 --> 00:21:08,975
Gregor.
My goodness.
475
00:21:09,810 --> 00:21:12,646
Dina, Dina Bobina,
Banana Fana Fofina.
476
00:21:12,730 --> 00:21:14,564
I'm so happy to see you.
477
00:21:15,191 --> 00:21:16,191
Lovely Dina.
478
00:21:16,525 --> 00:21:17,692
You, too, Gregor.
479
00:21:18,402 --> 00:21:19,444
Hello, Jack.
480
00:21:19,528 --> 00:21:20,528
Greg.
481
00:21:26,535 --> 00:21:27,661
Everything okay, Greg?
482
00:21:27,870 --> 00:21:28,870
Everything's great.
483
00:21:29,121 --> 00:21:30,121
Good.
484
00:21:30,206 --> 00:21:32,290
Unfortunately,
renovations on the house,
485
00:21:32,375 --> 00:21:34,209
not quite where
I'd like them to be.
486
00:21:34,460 --> 00:21:35,752
Well, those things happen.
487
00:21:36,128 --> 00:21:38,296
They do. I mean,
never to me before.
488
00:21:44,053 --> 00:21:47,806
And Sam here has done
very, very well with her
tae kwon do lessons.
489
00:21:47,890 --> 00:21:48,890
She's a... What are you?
A yellow belt now?
490
00:21:48,975 --> 00:21:49,975
Yep.
491
00:21:50,059 --> 00:21:51,101
Yellow belt.
492
00:21:51,185 --> 00:21:52,435
Wow, sweetheart.
Very impressive.
493
00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:54,813
She's lethal.
She is a ninja.
494
00:21:54,897 --> 00:21:55,981
PAM: Proud of her.
495
00:21:56,065 --> 00:22:00,318
Now, Henry,
you're going to drink
your milk, aren't you?
496
00:22:00,403 --> 00:22:02,487
You want to hit the same
growth spurt as your sister.
497
00:22:02,571 --> 00:22:03,613
DINA: Jack.
498
00:22:03,698 --> 00:22:04,948
I'm just saying, you know,
it's hard to believe
499
00:22:05,032 --> 00:22:06,157
that they're
three minutes apart.
500
00:22:06,242 --> 00:22:07,200
Shh.
501
00:22:07,284 --> 00:22:09,244
Henry, do what
your grandpa says.
502
00:22:09,745 --> 00:22:11,079
Aw, man.
For real.
503
00:22:12,164 --> 00:22:13,164
Good man.
504
00:22:14,166 --> 00:22:15,875
Okay. Who wants some turkey?
505
00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:17,585
I do, right here!
Right here!
506
00:22:18,087 --> 00:22:20,839
Sweetheart, you didn't
have to make a whole
turkey just for us.
507
00:22:20,923 --> 00:22:21,923
Why not?
508
00:22:22,049 --> 00:22:23,049
Actually, Greg did it.
509
00:22:23,509 --> 00:22:24,509
DINA: Greg.
510
00:22:24,635 --> 00:22:26,386
Well, I remember
at last year's Thanksgiving,
511
00:22:26,470 --> 00:22:28,179
Jack said he liked
roast turkey so much
512
00:22:28,264 --> 00:22:30,348
and he couldn't
understand why people
only had it once a year.
513
00:22:30,516 --> 00:22:32,100
Excellent memory, Greg.
514
00:22:32,226 --> 00:22:35,437
Plus, it's a wonderfully
lean meat. Healthy.
Good for your heart.
515
00:22:37,023 --> 00:22:38,148
Such a sweetheart.
516
00:22:39,025 --> 00:22:40,400
Grandpa Jack,
can I ask you a question?
517
00:22:40,484 --> 00:22:41,818
You surely can.
518
00:22:41,902 --> 00:22:43,570
How come you're afraid
of lizards?
519
00:22:43,654 --> 00:22:47,240
Henry, that's
a very good question.
And I'll tell you why.
520
00:22:47,324 --> 00:22:50,368
When I was stationed
in the Mekong Delta
during the Vietnam War,
521
00:22:50,453 --> 00:22:54,039
a tiny gecko crawled
into my ear one night
and laid its eggs.
522
00:22:54,123 --> 00:22:58,710
And I had to endure
the torturous probing
of our unit's medic
523
00:22:58,794 --> 00:23:00,879
to remove the lizard larvae
from my ear canal
524
00:23:00,963 --> 00:23:03,048
before they hatched
into my brain.
525
00:23:03,132 --> 00:23:04,257
Jack.
526
00:23:04,341 --> 00:23:05,341
Cool.
527
00:23:05,843 --> 00:23:06,885
Yuck.
528
00:23:06,969 --> 00:23:08,470
Yes, thanks for
sharing that, Dad.
529
00:23:08,596 --> 00:23:13,266
All right,
gobble, gobble, everybody!
It's turkey time!
530
00:23:15,061 --> 00:23:17,395
DINA: That looks good.
That's a work of art.
531
00:23:17,480 --> 00:23:18,563
Thank you very much.
532
00:23:18,647 --> 00:23:19,647
Looks great, Greg.
533
00:23:20,107 --> 00:23:22,567
Thank you, Jack.
And to carve it,
534
00:23:22,651 --> 00:23:26,112
I thought we might use
the beautiful
Irish hunting knife
535
00:23:26,197 --> 00:23:28,406
emblazoned with
the Byrnes family crest
536
00:23:28,491 --> 00:23:31,076
that Jack so thoughtfully
brought back for us
537
00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:33,244
from his ancestral homeland.
538
00:23:34,413 --> 00:23:35,747
Look at that, kids.
DINA: Great.
539
00:23:35,831 --> 00:23:37,123
Wow.
Look at that.
540
00:23:37,208 --> 00:23:40,168
See that crest?
That was used
by your ancestors
541
00:23:40,252 --> 00:23:43,505
long time ago,
back in the olden days,
to identify their family.
542
00:23:44,006 --> 00:23:45,423
Daddy, can I ask
you a question?
543
00:23:45,591 --> 00:23:48,426
Absolutely.
He loves history.
Just soaks it up.
544
00:23:49,261 --> 00:23:51,137
Can a girl poop
from her vagina?
545
00:23:54,141 --> 00:23:55,517
No, she cannot.
546
00:23:55,810 --> 00:23:56,851
They're a little
young for genealogy.
547
00:23:56,936 --> 00:23:57,936
GREG: Yes.
548
00:23:58,020 --> 00:23:59,687
Just a little off topic there.
549
00:24:00,147 --> 00:24:02,065
Jack. Here you go!
550
00:24:02,274 --> 00:24:05,235
Greg. You're
the turkey carver now.
551
00:24:06,487 --> 00:24:07,737
Thank you. I'm honored.
552
00:24:09,657 --> 00:24:12,367
All right. Let's carve
the roast beast!
553
00:24:12,451 --> 00:24:13,451
DINA: Mmm.
554
00:24:13,536 --> 00:24:15,120
Let's see. I think
I'll start right side.
555
00:24:15,204 --> 00:24:16,704
DINA: Nice and tender.
556
00:24:18,082 --> 00:24:20,708
So, Greg, how are you
liking your new job?
557
00:24:21,585 --> 00:24:22,710
Well, I'll tell you, Dina,
558
00:24:23,587 --> 00:24:25,755
it's a lot of responsibility
on my plate.
559
00:24:26,132 --> 00:24:28,842
But that's kind of
what I love about it.
560
00:24:29,677 --> 00:24:31,928
I mean, the opportunity
to manage an entire unit,
561
00:24:32,555 --> 00:24:33,596
in a way,
it's kind of like...
562
00:24:35,224 --> 00:24:36,641
Christ!
Shit!
563
00:24:41,772 --> 00:24:43,690
Why couldn't you just get him
a warm-blooded animal?
564
00:24:43,774 --> 00:24:45,233
Pressure.
SAMANTHA: Mom!
565
00:24:46,527 --> 00:24:47,527
PAM: Honey. It's okay,
it's okay, honey.
566
00:24:47,611 --> 00:24:49,445
Hello.
PAM: Where is he going?
Are you okay?
567
00:24:49,530 --> 00:24:50,697
Hey, Kevin!
568
00:24:50,781 --> 00:24:52,615
It's Kevin, everybody.
569
00:24:52,700 --> 00:24:53,700
What?
Okay.
570
00:24:54,702 --> 00:24:55,869
You're in Chicago?
571
00:25:02,626 --> 00:25:04,544
Hey. Hey.
572
00:25:04,795 --> 00:25:06,713
Hey, everybody. Hello.
Kevin.
573
00:25:06,797 --> 00:25:08,131
J. B.
574
00:25:08,465 --> 00:25:10,341
Good to see you.
575
00:25:11,010 --> 00:25:13,386
There he is!
The engaged guy!
576
00:25:13,470 --> 00:25:14,637
How you doing, man?
577
00:25:14,805 --> 00:25:15,889
What happened
to your pointer?
578
00:25:15,973 --> 00:25:19,434
I had a little incident
with the business end
of a turkey. It's cool.
579
00:25:19,560 --> 00:25:20,685
Where's Svetlana?
Yeah!
580
00:25:20,769 --> 00:25:23,646
Or should I say, the future
Mrs. Kevin Rawley?
581
00:25:24,607 --> 00:25:26,024
She broke up with me.
582
00:25:26,192 --> 00:25:27,984
No.
583
00:25:28,110 --> 00:25:29,110
GREG: You're kidding.
584
00:25:29,195 --> 00:25:30,320
I'm so sorry.
585
00:25:30,404 --> 00:25:31,446
Thanks, Pam.
586
00:25:34,283 --> 00:25:36,451
You always know exactly
the right thing to say to me.
587
00:25:37,203 --> 00:25:38,203
"I'm so sorry"?
588
00:25:38,954 --> 00:25:40,955
My anchor.
589
00:25:41,457 --> 00:25:42,457
What happened?
590
00:25:42,666 --> 00:25:44,375
What?
What happened?
591
00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:47,337
I don't know.
I'm still trying to
make sense of it myself.
592
00:25:47,421 --> 00:25:49,464
We were having
some street food
593
00:25:49,548 --> 00:25:51,549
outside a government
building in Bulgaria
594
00:25:52,134 --> 00:25:53,635
and I said, "Hey, you want
to get married?"
595
00:25:53,719 --> 00:25:55,595
And I took out
a little piece of string
596
00:25:55,679 --> 00:25:57,555
and I tied the twine
around her finger,
597
00:25:57,640 --> 00:25:59,766
and she just...
She threw it on
the ground and said no.
598
00:25:59,934 --> 00:26:01,476
Or nyet,
'cause she's Russian.
599
00:26:01,602 --> 00:26:04,562
She caught the next
plane out of there.
Adiós, Kevin.
600
00:26:04,980 --> 00:26:06,731
Your proposal seems
way out of character.
601
00:26:06,815 --> 00:26:08,566
Why did you put
so little effort into it?
602
00:26:08,943 --> 00:26:09,943
Greg told me to.
603
00:26:11,487 --> 00:26:12,946
What are you...
Kevin, no, no.
604
00:26:13,197 --> 00:26:15,156
What are you talking about?
I didn't...
HENRY: Daddy?
605
00:26:15,282 --> 00:26:16,491
I can't sleep.
606
00:26:17,117 --> 00:26:18,368
Still in diapers.
607
00:26:18,702 --> 00:26:21,162
No, Jack, they're pull-ups.
We're weaning him off diapers.
608
00:26:21,622 --> 00:26:22,580
What's up, man?
609
00:26:22,665 --> 00:26:25,333
I can't stop thinking
about all that blood.
610
00:26:25,417 --> 00:26:27,460
Really? All right, well,
how about I read you a story?
611
00:26:27,544 --> 00:26:28,920
Uncle Kevin!
612
00:26:29,004 --> 00:26:30,338
How you doing, tiger?
613
00:26:30,422 --> 00:26:32,090
Good.
614
00:26:32,174 --> 00:26:33,174
Wow.
615
00:26:34,176 --> 00:26:35,301
Are you having
a hard time sleeping?
616
00:26:35,386 --> 00:26:37,845
Yeah.
617
00:26:41,600 --> 00:26:43,101
There we go.
618
00:26:43,185 --> 00:26:44,185
Jesus. Henry?
619
00:26:44,979 --> 00:26:46,688
Are you...
Shh. He's sleeping.
620
00:26:48,065 --> 00:26:50,191
He's sleeping.
I put him in a still-point.
621
00:26:50,609 --> 00:26:51,985
It's a massage technique
622
00:26:52,069 --> 00:26:54,070
that relaxes
the body by gently
623
00:26:54,154 --> 00:26:56,364
easing the flow of
cerebrospinal fluid.
624
00:26:56,615 --> 00:26:58,074
Yeah. Look at him.
625
00:26:58,158 --> 00:27:00,285
He's gonna wake up
feeling so refreshed.
626
00:27:00,703 --> 00:27:03,288
I've been studying
a lot of Eastern medicine
in my down time.
627
00:27:04,123 --> 00:27:06,291
Well, listen,
I just came by
to say my hellos,
628
00:27:06,375 --> 00:27:07,875
so I will head on out.
629
00:27:08,002 --> 00:27:08,960
Good.
Okay.
630
00:27:09,044 --> 00:27:11,129
Hey, Kev, listen,
do you need a place to stay?
631
00:27:11,213 --> 00:27:13,423
No, he doesn't.
You got a place
to stay, right?
632
00:27:13,507 --> 00:27:15,049
And we're pretty full up.
Not a problem.
633
00:27:15,134 --> 00:27:16,968
I volunteer at a South Side
homeless shelter.
634
00:27:17,052 --> 00:27:18,428
So, I'll probably
stay there
635
00:27:18,512 --> 00:27:19,929
and just work
the soup kitchen line
in the morning.
636
00:27:20,014 --> 00:27:22,098
That is so
wonderful, Kevin.
637
00:27:22,182 --> 00:27:24,309
Yeah, it's funny,
I feed them food,
638
00:27:24,393 --> 00:27:26,602
but those vagrants
and drifters feed my soul,
639
00:27:27,104 --> 00:27:28,771
so it works out
pretty good for all of us.
640
00:27:29,398 --> 00:27:31,149
Perfect.
We always need extra hands,
641
00:27:31,233 --> 00:27:32,900
if you guys wanna
come on down tomorrow...
642
00:27:33,068 --> 00:27:35,486
Actually, Greg and I
are taking a tour
of this place called
643
00:27:35,571 --> 00:27:37,238
the Early Human
School tomorrow.
644
00:27:37,323 --> 00:27:38,448
But maybe after...
You're kidding me,
645
00:27:38,574 --> 00:27:39,657
the Early Human School?
646
00:27:40,075 --> 00:27:41,034
Right.
647
00:27:41,118 --> 00:27:42,827
My investment group
handles their endowment fund.
648
00:27:42,911 --> 00:27:44,746
In fact,
the director, Prudence,
649
00:27:44,830 --> 00:27:46,581
is a dear friend
and ex-lover of mine.
650
00:27:47,666 --> 00:27:49,125
I'm gonna put in
a good word for you.
651
00:27:49,293 --> 00:27:51,294
That would be great,
wouldn't it?
652
00:27:51,545 --> 00:27:52,503
Of course.
653
00:27:52,588 --> 00:27:55,256
Or not. I mean,
you know, she's an ex-lover,
I think that'd be awkward.
654
00:27:55,424 --> 00:27:58,134
No, nonsense.
I'm on great terms
with all my ex-lovers.
655
00:27:59,178 --> 00:28:00,970
Thanks.
Sure.
656
00:28:01,847 --> 00:28:05,350
Okay. All right,
well, you know,
whatever feels right.
657
00:28:05,434 --> 00:28:08,227
After the tour, Greg,
I was hoping you'd
show us your new house.
658
00:28:08,312 --> 00:28:09,604
And, Kevin,
when you're done
feeding the bums,
659
00:28:09,688 --> 00:28:10,938
why don't you meet us there?
660
00:28:11,023 --> 00:28:12,607
Okay. I'll be there.
661
00:28:12,691 --> 00:28:14,609
You know what, Jack?
I still have some items
on the punch list
662
00:28:14,693 --> 00:28:15,693
to go through
with the contractors,
663
00:28:15,778 --> 00:28:17,570
so I'm thinking
maybe we should
put it off for a few days.
664
00:28:17,654 --> 00:28:19,447
No,
let's do it tomorrow.
Well, I think...
665
00:28:19,573 --> 00:28:20,907
We'll meet you
there at noon, Kevin.
I don't know.
666
00:28:20,949 --> 00:28:22,533
At noon?
Yeah, all right.
Okay.
667
00:28:22,618 --> 00:28:24,202
And we're gonna
get you through this.
668
00:28:24,286 --> 00:28:26,454
Anything you need,
you come to me.
669
00:28:26,538 --> 00:28:27,705
Okay. Thanks, J. B.
670
00:28:27,790 --> 00:28:29,165
Yeah. Or me.
671
00:28:31,710 --> 00:28:32,752
Okay.
672
00:28:32,836 --> 00:28:34,670
Well, you can come
to either of us.
673
00:28:34,755 --> 00:28:35,922
Yeah, we're here for you.
674
00:28:36,006 --> 00:28:37,173
Thanks.
675
00:28:38,258 --> 00:28:39,300
Careful, yeah.
676
00:28:43,639 --> 00:28:45,014
PAM: I feel like crap.
GREG: Yeah.
677
00:28:45,307 --> 00:28:46,307
You're burning up.
678
00:28:46,392 --> 00:28:49,310
Yeah, I must have
gotten the flu
the kids had last week.
679
00:28:49,395 --> 00:28:50,436
My God,
the school tour is today.
680
00:28:50,521 --> 00:28:51,521
Yeah, I know.
681
00:28:51,605 --> 00:28:52,855
Honey, what am I gonna do?
682
00:28:52,940 --> 00:28:54,148
I'll do it. Okay?
I'll handle it.
683
00:28:54,233 --> 00:28:55,233
Yeah?
Yeah, and your mom
684
00:28:55,317 --> 00:28:56,401
can take the kids
to school.
685
00:28:56,485 --> 00:28:57,944
But what about my dad?
686
00:28:58,153 --> 00:28:59,654
I got it, all right?
687
00:29:03,367 --> 00:29:06,202
I really appreciate
your including me
on the school tour, Greg.
688
00:29:06,286 --> 00:29:09,288
Jack, you are
a trusted advisor.
689
00:29:09,665 --> 00:29:13,167
I mean, your words
hit home about
a top-notch education,
690
00:29:13,252 --> 00:29:14,544
getting your
financial house in order.
691
00:29:14,670 --> 00:29:15,920
That's it. That's it.
692
00:29:16,004 --> 00:29:17,255
It's all about
the kids, right?
693
00:29:17,339 --> 00:29:18,548
The next generation.
694
00:29:18,632 --> 00:29:19,841
I'm glad to
hear you say that.
695
00:29:20,134 --> 00:29:21,676
Makes me feel that
I've chosen wisely.
696
00:29:22,719 --> 00:29:24,637
Of course,
children change
everything in a marriage,
697
00:29:24,721 --> 00:29:26,264
and that was the issue
with Debbie and Bob.
698
00:29:26,348 --> 00:29:29,016
They stopped finding
time for each other
once LJ came into their lives,
699
00:29:29,101 --> 00:29:31,394
so Bob sought
sexual fulfillment
outside the marriage.
700
00:29:31,478 --> 00:29:32,478
Mmm.
701
00:29:32,646 --> 00:29:34,522
Dr. Bob.
Dr. Bob.
702
00:29:34,648 --> 00:29:36,065
He really disappointed me.
703
00:29:36,650 --> 00:29:40,319
I'll tell you something.
I'd like to really teach
that bastard a lesson.
704
00:29:41,113 --> 00:29:42,613
I happen to have
his new address.
705
00:29:42,739 --> 00:29:44,282
Perhaps you and I should
sneak in there one night
706
00:29:44,366 --> 00:29:46,659
and plant a tiny
explosive device
in the stove.
707
00:29:46,743 --> 00:29:48,619
Make it look like a gas leak.
708
00:29:51,582 --> 00:29:52,915
Yeah. Yeah.
709
00:29:53,125 --> 00:29:55,042
Or we could,
you know, maybe
710
00:29:55,127 --> 00:29:58,421
find some less criminal way
of teaching him a lesson.
711
00:29:58,505 --> 00:30:00,590
You know, still get him.
712
00:30:01,216 --> 00:30:02,383
I'm only joking, Greg.
713
00:30:02,468 --> 00:30:03,718
Okay.
714
00:30:04,636 --> 00:30:05,636
But it would be fun.
715
00:30:05,721 --> 00:30:06,721
Yeah, oh,
it would be great.
716
00:30:07,222 --> 00:30:10,224
I'm hoping that you and Pam
are still finding time
for each other.
717
00:30:11,143 --> 00:30:12,185
Yeah.
718
00:30:12,269 --> 00:30:14,103
Yeah, are you kidding?
Yeah, no, no,
we're great, we're...
719
00:30:14,229 --> 00:30:15,188
Good.
720
00:30:15,272 --> 00:30:16,522
I mean, you know,
it's not easy.
721
00:30:16,607 --> 00:30:17,773
You got to work
at it, but...
722
00:30:18,233 --> 00:30:20,109
Are you still
physically attracted
to my daughter, Greg?
723
00:30:20,486 --> 00:30:25,323
To Pam? Are you kidding? Yes.
Jack, there's never been
a problem with that.
724
00:30:25,782 --> 00:30:29,243
Even after her body's
endured the hellish ordeal
of birthing twins?
725
00:30:29,578 --> 00:30:34,832
Yes. Even after that.
It's still... It's all good.
It's all good under the hood.
726
00:30:37,044 --> 00:30:38,503
That's disgusting.
727
00:30:48,430 --> 00:30:50,181
Welcome, parents.
728
00:30:51,183 --> 00:30:54,519
I'm Prudence Simmons,
director of
the Early Human School.
729
00:30:55,771 --> 00:30:59,273
And at E. H.S., we know.
730
00:31:00,442 --> 00:31:04,529
We know that no two
early humans are alike.
731
00:31:05,155 --> 00:31:09,158
So why should their
educational experiences
be identical? Right?
732
00:31:09,910 --> 00:31:11,160
Makes sense.
733
00:31:11,578 --> 00:31:15,206
lt's not about
the 99.8% of graduates
734
00:31:15,290 --> 00:31:16,916
that go on to the best
secondary schools.
735
00:31:17,668 --> 00:31:18,960
Wow, impressive.
736
00:31:19,044 --> 00:31:20,044
Yeah.
737
00:31:22,548 --> 00:31:24,632
That guy's really been
hitting the Bowflex, huh?
738
00:31:24,716 --> 00:31:25,716
What?
739
00:31:25,884 --> 00:31:28,636
It's not
the overwhelming number
of Early Human alumni
740
00:31:28,971 --> 00:31:33,975
that become civic leaders,
CEOs of Fortune
500 companies. No.
741
00:31:34,518 --> 00:31:38,896
What's important to us
is that they become
themselves.
742
00:31:39,106 --> 00:31:42,441
PRUDENCE: Please welcome
the Early Human Tumblers!
743
00:31:47,739 --> 00:31:48,739
Whoo!
744
00:31:49,992 --> 00:31:51,242
Kids are really good.
745
00:31:51,326 --> 00:31:53,119
I like what I'm seeing
from this place.
746
00:31:53,203 --> 00:31:54,996
Yeah.
And I'm sure
it doesn't come cheap.
747
00:31:55,497 --> 00:31:56,622
Mmm-mmm.
748
00:31:57,040 --> 00:31:58,165
You think you can swing it?
749
00:31:58,250 --> 00:31:59,250
Mmm-hmm.
750
00:31:59,668 --> 00:32:02,003
Yeah. Yeah,
I got it covered.
751
00:32:02,504 --> 00:32:04,255
And, you know,
752
00:32:04,339 --> 00:32:06,215
if it's not covered
right now,
it will be covered.
753
00:32:06,508 --> 00:32:09,051
It's one of those things
that you cover it.
754
00:32:09,136 --> 00:32:10,303
Do you have the money
or not, Greg?
755
00:32:10,387 --> 00:32:11,721
New friends, hello!
756
00:32:11,805 --> 00:32:12,888
Hi.
757
00:32:12,973 --> 00:32:13,973
Hi, I'm Prudence. Greg?
758
00:32:14,057 --> 00:32:15,057
Greg. How are you?
759
00:32:15,142 --> 00:32:16,309
Jack?
Jack Byrnes.
760
00:32:16,393 --> 00:32:19,770
So, Jack and Greg,
tell me what path
you've chosen.
761
00:32:22,065 --> 00:32:23,691
How do you make a "living"?
762
00:32:23,859 --> 00:32:26,152
Okay, well,
I'm a nurse.
763
00:32:28,030 --> 00:32:29,030
He's being modest.
764
00:32:29,114 --> 00:32:31,782
He's actually
the department manager
of the medical-surgical unit
765
00:32:31,867 --> 00:32:35,620
at Chicago Memorial
and I am a retired florist.
766
00:32:35,954 --> 00:32:38,289
What a combination,
a nurse and a florist?
767
00:32:38,707 --> 00:32:40,041
How great.
768
00:32:40,125 --> 00:32:42,084
May I ask how long
you've been
in each other's lives?
769
00:32:42,586 --> 00:32:44,462
I'd say... Well,
it's about eight years,
hasn't it been?
770
00:32:44,546 --> 00:32:45,755
Yeah, eight years.
771
00:32:46,006 --> 00:32:47,214
I'd say eight years.
Really?
772
00:32:47,299 --> 00:32:48,424
Yeah, yeah.
Eight great years. Yeah.
773
00:32:48,508 --> 00:32:49,759
Eight great years.
774
00:32:49,843 --> 00:32:51,510
Well, it started out
a little rocky.
775
00:32:51,678 --> 00:32:53,012
We've had our moments.
776
00:32:53,096 --> 00:32:54,680
Yes, but then
we figured it out.
777
00:32:55,265 --> 00:32:56,891
You seem like
a wonderful couple.
778
00:32:58,602 --> 00:33:00,311
No, no, no.
We're not homosexuals.
Yeah, no.
779
00:33:00,395 --> 00:33:02,188
No, no. No, no, no, no,
this is my son-in-law.
780
00:33:03,273 --> 00:33:04,482
Yeah, yeah,
no, no, no, no.
781
00:33:05,025 --> 00:33:09,070
However, if you're
looking to fill a quota,
we can be flexible.
782
00:33:09,905 --> 00:33:12,531
Okay, that's an
interesting joke,
783
00:33:12,616 --> 00:33:15,534
but I appreciate
levity in a moment
of misunderstanding,
784
00:33:15,619 --> 00:33:17,036
so thank you, Greg.
785
00:33:17,537 --> 00:33:18,704
I will say, Jack,
I hope I didn't offend you.
786
00:33:18,789 --> 00:33:19,997
No, no.
787
00:33:20,082 --> 00:33:21,040
Really?
788
00:33:21,124 --> 00:33:24,210
No. I mean,
I'm not gay myself,
but if I were gay,
789
00:33:24,294 --> 00:33:28,130
I would certainly be proud
to choose a life partner
like Gay Focker.
790
00:33:28,507 --> 00:33:30,257
And that's
his actual name.
791
00:33:32,594 --> 00:33:36,097
It is. Well,
it's my, Gaylord was my name
when I was a kid and, yeah.
792
00:33:36,390 --> 00:33:38,891
Well, I'll complete
the conversation with that.
793
00:33:38,975 --> 00:33:40,017
Jack.
794
00:33:40,143 --> 00:33:41,477
Prudence.
Pleasure.
795
00:33:42,104 --> 00:33:43,938
Gay. Great.
Greg.
796
00:33:44,523 --> 00:33:45,815
Change that nametag.
797
00:33:45,941 --> 00:33:47,650
You can call...
It's Greg. Greg is fine.
798
00:33:47,734 --> 00:33:49,402
Why don't we just
stick with the truth?
799
00:33:58,328 --> 00:34:01,372
An original
American Foursquare,
Greg, very nice.
800
00:34:01,456 --> 00:34:05,292
Yeah, yeah.
It's got rock-solid bones
and, you know, it's...
801
00:34:12,426 --> 00:34:14,427
Hey! There they are.
802
00:34:15,387 --> 00:34:17,304
Kev-O, that's quite a rental.
KEVIN: Yeah.
803
00:34:17,389 --> 00:34:19,181
Gustavo, my assistant,
hooked it up.
804
00:34:19,266 --> 00:34:21,183
I guess it's
a Tesla Roadster
or something.
805
00:34:21,727 --> 00:34:24,979
Supposedly eco-friendly,
like that 2003 Prius, Greg.
806
00:34:25,063 --> 00:34:26,188
Yeah, you got it.
807
00:34:26,273 --> 00:34:27,815
Wow. It looks great.
808
00:34:28,150 --> 00:34:29,817
Traditional
American Foursquare.
809
00:34:29,901 --> 00:34:31,527
Also known as
a Prairie Box.
810
00:34:31,820 --> 00:34:33,320
KEVIN: Yeah.
GREG: It's got
really good bones.
811
00:34:33,405 --> 00:34:35,072
Good eye, Kev.
812
00:34:36,658 --> 00:34:37,992
MAN: Look out
for your legs.
813
00:34:39,494 --> 00:34:40,494
RANDY: That's good.
814
00:34:40,579 --> 00:34:41,579
Randy? Randy,
what is this?
815
00:34:42,164 --> 00:34:44,623
Gregory Focker!
816
00:34:45,000 --> 00:34:46,292
Great to see you.
How you doing, Dad?
817
00:34:46,376 --> 00:34:47,418
GREG: Hey.
818
00:34:47,502 --> 00:34:49,795
Randy, what is this?
We're having the party
here in two days.
819
00:34:50,046 --> 00:34:51,297
RANDY: Um...
820
00:34:51,381 --> 00:34:52,840
Refresh my memory, Gregory.
821
00:34:53,341 --> 00:34:55,843
Are you kidding me?
Randy, the twins'
birthday party, remember?
822
00:34:56,136 --> 00:34:57,178
Yes, of course!
823
00:34:57,846 --> 00:34:58,804
The issue
we're dealing with is
824
00:34:58,889 --> 00:35:03,267
that we had to excavate
60 feet of root-infested
pipe back here!
825
00:35:03,351 --> 00:35:05,102
So, of course,
we ran into some
unexpected costs
826
00:35:05,187 --> 00:35:06,812
along with an obvious delay.
827
00:35:06,897 --> 00:35:09,398
Randy, is this yard
gonna be done or is it
not gonna be done?
828
00:35:09,483 --> 00:35:10,900
Jack, I got this.
All right?
829
00:35:11,067 --> 00:35:14,361
KEVIN: All Mr. Byrnes
is suggesting is that
maybe inadvertently
830
00:35:14,654 --> 00:35:17,490
you're taking advantage
of a gentle, trusting soul
831
00:35:17,574 --> 00:35:20,493
who clearly is an amateur
when it comes to
home construction.
832
00:35:20,577 --> 00:35:22,453
No, Kevin.
Thank you, Swami Salami.
833
00:35:22,537 --> 00:35:23,871
That's not true at all.
834
00:35:23,955 --> 00:35:25,289
It is true, Greg.
They're ripping you off.
835
00:35:25,373 --> 00:35:27,166
No, Jack...
Your plumbing excavators
836
00:35:27,292 --> 00:35:29,251
have been on coffee break
for the past eight minutes,
837
00:35:29,336 --> 00:35:32,296
this senior citizen over here
is unfit for active duty
838
00:35:32,380 --> 00:35:34,799
and your backhoe driver's
halfway through
a Sudoku puzzle.
839
00:35:34,925 --> 00:35:35,925
All right.
Gregory,
840
00:35:36,009 --> 00:35:38,803
who is this joker
questioning my honor?
841
00:35:38,887 --> 00:35:40,638
Nobody's questioning
your honor, Randy.
842
00:35:40,722 --> 00:35:42,515
I'm 34 years in the trade!
843
00:35:42,599 --> 00:35:43,808
Thirty-four years, huh?
844
00:35:43,892 --> 00:35:47,728
I got to pump, dump
and hump to get that
backyard whole again!
845
00:35:47,813 --> 00:35:50,815
Well, I got news for you.
You can pump, dump
and hump all you want!
846
00:35:50,899 --> 00:35:52,358
You're sandbagging
this damn job
and you know it.
847
00:35:52,442 --> 00:35:53,442
All right. You know what?
Jack, Jack, Jack!
848
00:35:53,568 --> 00:35:55,486
Calm down!
You're leaving a big hole, you...
849
00:35:55,570 --> 00:35:58,572
Hey, General!
The Japanese surrendered!
850
00:35:58,657 --> 00:36:00,032
The Japanese surrendered!
That's it!
851
00:36:00,158 --> 00:36:01,492
What are you talking about?
852
00:36:02,244 --> 00:36:03,327
World War II.
853
00:36:03,745 --> 00:36:05,996
I'll tell you what, Gregor.
I have a timeshare in town.
854
00:36:06,081 --> 00:36:07,331
Why don't we have
the party there?
855
00:36:07,415 --> 00:36:09,083
Beautiful meadow.
It'll be perfect.
856
00:36:09,167 --> 00:36:10,960
No, no, Kevin,
I promised the kids
857
00:36:11,044 --> 00:36:12,753
they're gonna have
the party in the yard.
858
00:36:12,838 --> 00:36:16,257
So, guess what?
We're gonna have the party
in the yard. Okay?
859
00:36:16,341 --> 00:36:18,384
Soon as our
dump truck driver's
back from lunch,
860
00:36:18,468 --> 00:36:20,177
we'll get that out,
bring the backhoe in,
861
00:36:20,262 --> 00:36:21,887
lay down your
base layer of sand.
862
00:36:22,305 --> 00:36:24,598
Wait a minute.
You're telling us that
you can't move that rig?
863
00:36:24,850 --> 00:36:26,350
That's a union job, pops.
864
00:36:26,434 --> 00:36:28,227
Screw it. I'm gonna
move that truck myself.
865
00:36:28,311 --> 00:36:29,311
RANDY: No, come on.
No, you know what, Jack?
866
00:36:29,396 --> 00:36:30,688
I'll do it, okay?
You just help me
867
00:36:30,772 --> 00:36:32,356
back it out
into the street.
I got it.
868
00:36:33,650 --> 00:36:34,650
Here we go.
869
00:36:34,901 --> 00:36:36,944
All right,
start backing her up.
You're all clear.
870
00:36:42,951 --> 00:36:44,118
Coming at you, Jack!
871
00:36:44,327 --> 00:36:46,078
You're doing great,
you're doing great.
872
00:36:46,371 --> 00:36:49,540
Hey, look,
I'm not in the union, Randy!
I'm backing up the truck!
873
00:36:49,791 --> 00:36:53,294
Come on. Back, back, back.
Doing great. Doing great!
Doing great!
874
00:36:53,712 --> 00:36:55,129
Whoa! Whoa!
875
00:36:56,172 --> 00:36:57,381
Brake it!
876
00:36:58,967 --> 00:37:00,467
You got it!
877
00:37:01,344 --> 00:37:02,720
We're good.
RANDY: Emergency brake!
878
00:37:03,013 --> 00:37:04,013
Got it!
879
00:37:09,102 --> 00:37:12,021
Jack!
Holy shit!
880
00:37:12,105 --> 00:37:13,397
Hang on, I'm with you!
881
00:37:13,565 --> 00:37:15,399
Jack, I'm right here.
Jack, we're gonna get you!
882
00:37:16,192 --> 00:37:17,526
It's gonna be
all right, Jack!
883
00:37:17,861 --> 00:37:19,987
Jack, we're coming!
Hang on, Jack!
884
00:37:20,196 --> 00:37:21,196
I got him!
885
00:37:21,281 --> 00:37:22,281
I got you.
886
00:37:22,616 --> 00:37:25,242
- It's Kevin.
- I'm right here.
887
00:37:26,494 --> 00:37:28,203
Thank you, Kevin.
Save your strength.
888
00:37:28,288 --> 00:37:31,373
Upsy-daisy.
Greg's right here.
He's okay.
889
00:37:32,250 --> 00:37:33,375
Yeah, I see him.
890
00:37:34,753 --> 00:37:35,920
Hey, Jack.
891
00:37:36,963 --> 00:37:38,172
Here, it's starting.
892
00:37:38,256 --> 00:37:43,093
ANNOUNCER:
Ladies and gentlemen,
it's The Roz Focker Show!
893
00:37:44,471 --> 00:37:49,183
And that means it's time
to sexpress yourself!
894
00:37:50,352 --> 00:37:51,644
Hello, my audience!
895
00:37:51,728 --> 00:37:53,479
Hello, my friends. Welcome.
896
00:37:54,147 --> 00:37:56,273
Today, what do you think
we're going to talk about?
897
00:37:56,483 --> 00:37:58,442
MAN: Sex!
Sex. Sex.
898
00:37:58,526 --> 00:37:59,902
Well, what else is she
gonna talk about?
899
00:38:00,487 --> 00:38:02,196
Sex after children.
900
00:38:02,697 --> 00:38:04,281
How do you find
time to make love
901
00:38:04,366 --> 00:38:05,908
with young children
in the house?
902
00:38:06,618 --> 00:38:08,661
What do you do
if it's not working?
903
00:38:08,912 --> 00:38:09,912
Do you have an affair?
904
00:38:10,205 --> 00:38:11,455
ALL: No!
905
00:38:11,831 --> 00:38:15,167
No, you say?
But Roz Focker says yes!
906
00:38:15,585 --> 00:38:17,753
Yes, you do have an affair!
907
00:38:18,004 --> 00:38:21,382
You have an affair
with your wife!
908
00:38:21,967 --> 00:38:23,133
Roz!
909
00:38:23,218 --> 00:38:24,635
ROZ: Think about it, right?
910
00:38:24,719 --> 00:38:28,138
You dress up a little nicer.
You meet at a hotel.
911
00:38:28,390 --> 00:38:29,682
You role play.
912
00:38:30,058 --> 00:38:35,854
There is absolutely no shame
in playing out a fantasy,
but with each other!
913
00:38:37,399 --> 00:38:38,565
All right?
914
00:38:39,526 --> 00:38:42,277
Now, he's gonna kill me,
915
00:38:43,154 --> 00:38:48,200
but my own son,
who is the father
of two adorable twins,
916
00:38:49,327 --> 00:38:50,661
he has issues
in this department.
917
00:38:51,788 --> 00:38:54,581
He's busy at work.
She's busy at home.
918
00:38:54,666 --> 00:38:57,459
Their intimacy
numbers are down.
They're not connecting.
919
00:38:58,795 --> 00:39:00,129
And what do you do?
920
00:39:00,422 --> 00:39:02,923
It's called Sustengo.
Sustengo?
921
00:39:03,008 --> 00:39:05,009
I got to say, that sounds
pretty cheesy, Greg.
922
00:39:05,093 --> 00:39:08,303
Yeah, well,
I'm looking at these
Randy Weir bills, okay.
923
00:39:08,388 --> 00:39:09,555
And we could definitely
use the money.
924
00:39:09,723 --> 00:39:11,473
And do me a favor.
Don't tell your dad
about this, okay?
925
00:39:11,558 --> 00:39:12,850
My dad? Why?
926
00:39:12,934 --> 00:39:14,601
Just 'cause
he's been all into
927
00:39:14,769 --> 00:39:17,479
me having
my financial house
in order or whatever,
928
00:39:17,605 --> 00:39:19,273
and I just don't
want to worry him.
All right, fine.
929
00:39:19,607 --> 00:39:21,358
I won't say anything
because he's already
pretty upset
930
00:39:21,443 --> 00:39:23,444
about you trying to bury
him alive.
931
00:39:23,695 --> 00:39:24,820
Honey, it was an accident.
932
00:39:25,071 --> 00:39:26,113
Superstar!
933
00:39:26,406 --> 00:39:27,573
Hey. Hey, can you
hang on a second?
934
00:39:27,657 --> 00:39:28,657
Okay.
935
00:39:28,950 --> 00:39:30,826
I am so stoked
you changed your mind.
936
00:39:31,077 --> 00:39:34,038
You are going to rock
those urologists tonight.
937
00:39:34,122 --> 00:39:35,664
Awesome.
That's always been
a goal of mine.
938
00:39:35,957 --> 00:39:38,042
So, I'll see you
at 8:00 at the Hilton?
939
00:39:38,126 --> 00:39:39,084
Yes.
940
00:39:39,169 --> 00:39:41,128
And wear a suit.
Wear a suit, got it.
941
00:39:41,212 --> 00:39:42,755
Knuckles?
Knuckles.
942
00:39:42,922 --> 00:39:43,922
Okay, bye.
943
00:39:44,758 --> 00:39:45,841
Hey.
Hello.
944
00:39:45,925 --> 00:39:47,384
Knuckles? Who was that?
945
00:39:47,469 --> 00:39:49,136
That certainly
didn't sound like Kristen.
946
00:39:49,304 --> 00:39:51,430
No, no.
That was the drug rep.
947
00:39:51,723 --> 00:39:53,640
Andi?
Yeah, Andi.
948
00:39:54,142 --> 00:39:55,142
What does she look like?
949
00:39:55,518 --> 00:39:57,644
She's like a...
No, she's, like,
an ex-nurse.
950
00:39:57,729 --> 00:39:58,937
You wouldn't pick her
out of a lineup.
951
00:39:59,147 --> 00:40:00,355
Yeah, I know that
you're doing this for us,
952
00:40:00,440 --> 00:40:03,150
but the idea of you
and some woman
named Andi
953
00:40:03,234 --> 00:40:06,320
selling boner medicine
at a hotel, it really
kind of icks me out.
954
00:40:06,821 --> 00:40:08,655
Honey, there's nothing
to be icked out about.
955
00:40:08,740 --> 00:40:10,365
Okay, fine.
956
00:40:10,617 --> 00:40:12,576
l love you.
I love you, too, honey. Bye.
957
00:40:12,660 --> 00:40:13,827
Okay, bye.
958
00:40:20,335 --> 00:40:21,960
So, how come
you're not talking
to Daddy?
959
00:40:22,170 --> 00:40:23,587
'Cause he said
you were cuckoo.
960
00:40:24,380 --> 00:40:25,464
He said I was cuckoo?
961
00:40:25,799 --> 00:40:26,799
Mmm-hmm.
962
00:40:27,175 --> 00:40:28,842
Well, we'll have
to discuss that.
963
00:40:29,344 --> 00:40:30,344
Yeah.
964
00:40:30,845 --> 00:40:32,012
But what about
Mommy and Daddy?
965
00:40:32,097 --> 00:40:33,347
Is everything okay
with them?
966
00:40:34,474 --> 00:40:36,225
I guess
they fight sometimes.
967
00:40:36,309 --> 00:40:38,477
Mmm-hmm. And what do
they fight about?
968
00:40:38,853 --> 00:40:39,853
Um...
969
00:40:39,938 --> 00:40:44,024
Like Mommy got mad at Daddy
because he was going
to the hotel with Andi.
970
00:40:44,109 --> 00:40:45,109
Andi?
971
00:40:47,654 --> 00:40:48,695
Who's Andi?
972
00:40:48,780 --> 00:40:51,698
I can't say because
I'm not supposed
to be spying.
973
00:40:51,950 --> 00:40:54,952
Like I always tell you,
there's nothing
wrong with spying
974
00:40:55,036 --> 00:40:57,454
as long as you
suspect foul play.
975
00:40:58,540 --> 00:40:59,915
So, who's Andi?
976
00:41:00,250 --> 00:41:02,709
Andi gives Daddy
his boners.
977
00:41:04,379 --> 00:41:05,587
His what?
978
00:41:06,047 --> 00:41:08,966
Andi gives Daddy his boners.
979
00:41:09,551 --> 00:41:10,551
- huh.
980
00:41:12,720 --> 00:41:13,804
Hey, guys!
981
00:41:13,888 --> 00:41:15,222
DINA: Hey, Greg.
How was your day?
982
00:41:15,306 --> 00:41:16,890
HENRY: Yeah.
Great.
983
00:41:18,393 --> 00:41:19,393
Hey.
984
00:41:19,727 --> 00:41:20,727
How about you, Sam?
985
00:41:21,980 --> 00:41:23,730
What? Come on,
say something to me.
986
00:41:23,815 --> 00:41:24,982
No! I won't!
987
00:41:25,066 --> 00:41:27,067
You just did.
988
00:41:28,903 --> 00:41:30,237
Hey, Greg?
Yeah.
989
00:41:30,488 --> 00:41:31,822
I'm not so sure
990
00:41:31,906 --> 00:41:34,241
using chicanery
and subterfuge
on your daughter
991
00:41:34,325 --> 00:41:36,410
is the best way
to get her to
communicate with you.
992
00:41:36,536 --> 00:41:38,745
No, no, no. That's not
chicanery and subterfuge.
993
00:41:38,913 --> 00:41:40,414
For whatever it's worth.
994
00:41:41,457 --> 00:41:42,583
Worth a lot. Thank you.
995
00:41:42,750 --> 00:41:44,626
And I will
see you later, okay?
996
00:41:44,711 --> 00:41:47,796
I got roped into this hospital
administration dinner
thing tonight, so...
997
00:41:48,131 --> 00:41:49,423
Work function?
Yeah.
998
00:41:49,549 --> 00:41:52,634
It's the price of being
in charge of the unit, so...
999
00:41:53,261 --> 00:41:54,678
I see.
That last minute, huh?
1000
00:41:54,762 --> 00:41:55,804
Yeah.
1001
00:41:55,889 --> 00:41:58,932
Department head called
so I gotta do
a little face time and...
1002
00:41:59,309 --> 00:42:00,601
Have fun.
Okay.
1003
00:42:34,385 --> 00:42:35,385
Jack?
1004
00:42:35,845 --> 00:42:36,845
Jack!
1005
00:42:37,639 --> 00:42:38,639
Is that you?
1006
00:42:39,015 --> 00:42:40,474
Greg.
What are you doing out here?
1007
00:42:40,683 --> 00:42:42,976
Just picking up
some milk
for the morning.
1008
00:42:43,311 --> 00:42:44,811
You looking
for a market?
Yeah.
1009
00:42:45,104 --> 00:42:46,647
Okay, 'cause there's one
right across from the house.
1010
00:42:46,814 --> 00:42:48,315
Is there?
I didn't know that.
1011
00:42:48,399 --> 00:42:50,067
Just take a left
on Lincoln. Right there.
1012
00:42:50,235 --> 00:42:51,360
Thanks, Greg.
Okay.
1013
00:42:51,444 --> 00:42:52,611
See you later.
Okay.
1014
00:43:41,619 --> 00:43:42,619
Excuse me.
1015
00:43:46,291 --> 00:43:47,291
Hey!
1016
00:43:50,586 --> 00:43:51,586
Greg.
1017
00:43:51,838 --> 00:43:54,172
Hey, man.
You following me?
1018
00:43:54,882 --> 00:43:56,633
Following you?
Why would I be
following you?
1019
00:43:56,718 --> 00:43:58,343
No, I'm just
looking for milk.
1020
00:43:59,679 --> 00:44:03,265
Okay. 'Cause, remember,
I mentioned
out on the street there,
1021
00:44:03,349 --> 00:44:04,891
there's a store
right in the neighborhood.
1022
00:44:05,101 --> 00:44:06,893
True, but Dina likes
the organic stuff
1023
00:44:06,978 --> 00:44:09,438
and I heard there was
a natural food market
downtown.
1024
00:44:09,856 --> 00:44:13,317
Amazing, you going
all this way just for
a carton of milk.
1025
00:44:16,863 --> 00:44:18,322
You know what?
You should get off here.
1026
00:44:18,406 --> 00:44:20,741
There's a really great
natural foods market
1027
00:44:20,825 --> 00:44:22,659
about two blocks
south of the station.
1028
00:44:32,128 --> 00:44:33,170
Have a good night, Jack.
1029
00:44:33,421 --> 00:44:34,588
You, too, Greg.
1030
00:44:51,731 --> 00:44:52,731
GREG: Hey.
1031
00:44:53,066 --> 00:44:54,691
Hey.
1032
00:44:55,276 --> 00:44:56,401
Superstar!
1033
00:44:59,530 --> 00:45:02,115
Everything cool?
You seem a little edgy.
1034
00:45:02,283 --> 00:45:05,202
No, I'm good.
It's just my in-laws
are in town, so...
1035
00:45:05,620 --> 00:45:06,912
Anyway, I went over
the drug info
1036
00:45:06,996 --> 00:45:08,538
and I think I got
the science down
pretty well.
1037
00:45:08,623 --> 00:45:11,291
No, Greg.
These doctors don't care
about that stuff.
1038
00:45:11,542 --> 00:45:15,379
If you want to sell
a drug like Sustengo,
you have to make it personal.
1039
00:45:16,297 --> 00:45:17,756
Do you know any
sexually frustrated
1040
00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:19,424
old dudes with
a heart condition?
1041
00:45:39,737 --> 00:45:41,405
I didn't hear you come in.
1042
00:45:42,990 --> 00:45:44,866
What kept you so long?
1043
00:45:46,119 --> 00:45:48,829
I just got
a little bit lost.
Everyone asleep?
1044
00:45:48,913 --> 00:45:49,913
Yeah.
1045
00:45:50,164 --> 00:45:52,207
We've got
the house to ourselves.
1046
00:45:53,167 --> 00:45:58,964
I'm so happy that you
got away from your wife.
1047
00:46:00,133 --> 00:46:01,591
Excuse me?
1048
00:46:01,676 --> 00:46:03,427
She's been
very suspicious lately.
1049
00:46:03,928 --> 00:46:06,721
Quick, quick, quick.
We only have an hour.
1050
00:46:09,058 --> 00:46:10,809
I have no idea what
you're talking about.
1051
00:46:10,893 --> 00:46:13,228
Jack, come on.
You've gotta play along.
1052
00:46:13,312 --> 00:46:16,231
Roz Focker said
we have to have an affair
with each other.
1053
00:46:16,315 --> 00:46:17,941
I'm role playing.
1054
00:46:18,025 --> 00:46:19,234
Right, right, right.
I understand.
1055
00:46:19,318 --> 00:46:23,071
I just have
a bit of a headache,
sweetheart, tonight.
1056
00:46:23,197 --> 00:46:26,658
I know. You've had
that worried look
on your face all day.
1057
00:46:26,868 --> 00:46:30,537
I promise you,
the Focker family
is going to be fine.
1058
00:46:30,955 --> 00:46:32,289
Now, come on.
1059
00:46:32,540 --> 00:46:34,541
Before my husband
comes home.
1060
00:46:35,460 --> 00:46:38,712
Then, we'd better hurry,
my illicit lover.
Let me just brush my teeth.
1061
00:46:38,796 --> 00:46:40,088
Ooh.
1062
00:46:49,098 --> 00:46:51,766
Your father-in-law
did not really put you
in a lie detector machine.
1063
00:46:52,268 --> 00:46:53,435
No, that's true.
1064
00:46:53,519 --> 00:46:54,561
That's incredible!
1065
00:46:55,313 --> 00:46:58,148
Jesus Christ, I thought
my wife's father was bad.
1066
00:46:58,232 --> 00:46:59,316
That was
a great speech, nurse.
1067
00:46:59,859 --> 00:47:00,901
Thank you.
1068
00:47:00,985 --> 00:47:02,027
And hey,
"I'm staring at you."
1069
00:47:04,113 --> 00:47:06,948
It was "I'm watching you,"
but that's what he did, yes.
Thank you.
1070
00:47:07,408 --> 00:47:09,242
You killed it tonight.
1071
00:47:09,660 --> 00:47:12,204
Those stories
about your family
were hilarious.
1072
00:47:12,288 --> 00:47:14,164
Thank you.
So, I should be
getting going.
1073
00:47:14,332 --> 00:47:16,917
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
You're my fiancé.
1074
00:47:17,043 --> 00:47:18,502
Hey, gorgeous.
1075
00:47:18,586 --> 00:47:21,129
Hello, Dr. Ballard.
So nice to see you.
1076
00:47:21,214 --> 00:47:24,758
Hey, can I get you 200 cc's
of anything you want, stat?
1077
00:47:25,551 --> 00:47:28,887
Only if you can buy a drink
for my fiancé as well.
1078
00:47:29,805 --> 00:47:31,431
Didn't know
you were engaged.
1079
00:47:31,599 --> 00:47:33,683
Can you
take a picture for us
for my scrapbook?
1080
00:47:33,768 --> 00:47:35,519
You know what?
You don't...
He doesn't have to do that.
1081
00:47:35,603 --> 00:47:36,603
ANDI: Yeah, it's for
our scrapbook.
1082
00:47:36,687 --> 00:47:38,688
No, you know what, bro?
I'm cool like that.
I'll do that.
1083
00:47:38,773 --> 00:47:40,273
You are such a doll.
1084
00:47:40,566 --> 00:47:41,650
Here we go.
1085
00:47:42,360 --> 00:47:43,652
One, two, three.
Whoa!
1086
00:47:44,862 --> 00:47:45,862
Best picture ever.
1087
00:47:46,781 --> 00:47:48,990
You look great
and you have, like,
a red-eye problem.
1088
00:47:49,242 --> 00:47:50,367
I'll see you later, babe.
1089
00:47:50,451 --> 00:47:52,702
I cannot believe
I ever slept with that guy.
1090
00:47:52,912 --> 00:47:53,912
Yeah, right.
1091
00:47:53,996 --> 00:47:55,247
No, seriously, I did.
1092
00:47:55,498 --> 00:47:57,707
At a convention
in Milwaukee last summer.
1093
00:47:57,792 --> 00:48:01,127
We were, like,
drinking tequila,
doing rum chasers.
1094
00:48:01,879 --> 00:48:03,421
Always a bad idea, right?
1095
00:48:03,506 --> 00:48:04,548
Yeah.
1096
00:48:04,799 --> 00:48:06,716
Can you get me a margarita
on the rocks, no salt?
1097
00:48:08,261 --> 00:48:09,719
You know what...
I'm gonna run
to the restroom.
1098
00:48:09,804 --> 00:48:10,804
Gosh. You know what...
1099
00:48:10,888 --> 00:48:11,888
All right, cool.
You're the best.
1100
00:48:12,473 --> 00:48:14,140
All right? All right.
All right, okay.
1101
00:48:15,226 --> 00:48:19,104
Hi. Can I get a club soda
and a margarita
on the rocks with no salt?
1102
00:48:19,605 --> 00:48:20,647
Thanks.
1103
00:48:20,982 --> 00:48:22,315
Night out
on the town, Focker?
1104
00:48:23,734 --> 00:48:25,235
Dr. Bob.
Hey, man!
1105
00:48:25,319 --> 00:48:26,319
What are you doing here?
1106
00:48:26,404 --> 00:48:28,488
I'm here for the convention.
What about you?
1107
00:48:29,407 --> 00:48:31,908
Doing some work for Pfosten
as a medical expert.
1108
00:48:33,077 --> 00:48:34,077
But you're a nurse.
1109
00:48:34,287 --> 00:48:37,622
You know what?
I don't really have
anything to say to you.
1110
00:48:38,082 --> 00:48:41,918
Okay, I get it, Greg.
I screwed up.
1111
00:48:42,503 --> 00:48:44,921
But the pressure
of being in that family
finally got to me.
1112
00:48:45,047 --> 00:48:47,048
What are you talking about?
You were his golden boy.
1113
00:48:47,216 --> 00:48:48,800
More like his golden bitch.
1114
00:48:49,010 --> 00:48:51,845
He wanted Deb and me
to get married
in Oyster Bay. Done.
1115
00:48:52,138 --> 00:48:54,180
Can we name
our baby after him?
"You got it, Jack."
1116
00:48:54,557 --> 00:48:56,891
And he gives me this
whole spiel, right,
1117
00:48:56,976 --> 00:48:59,227
about how I'm next in line
to his throne.
1118
00:49:00,104 --> 00:49:02,772
He came up with
this name for me,
the Bobfather.
1119
00:49:05,818 --> 00:49:08,194
Really? He said that to you?
1120
00:49:10,531 --> 00:49:12,073
He pulled the same shit
on you, didn't he?
1121
00:49:12,491 --> 00:49:16,286
In that family,
we're all just hamsters
on Jack Byrnes' little wheel.
1122
00:49:16,370 --> 00:49:19,289
His Circus of Trust,
or whatever he calls it.
1123
00:49:19,999 --> 00:49:21,124
Circle of Trust.
1124
00:49:21,208 --> 00:49:23,460
I had no idea
how deep I was in
until I stepped away.
1125
00:49:23,544 --> 00:49:24,544
And I'll
tell you something,
1126
00:49:24,629 --> 00:49:27,547
once I got off the treadmill,
I've never been happier.
1127
00:49:28,633 --> 00:49:30,258
Yeah, well, I think
I got it under control.
1128
00:49:44,190 --> 00:49:45,190
Hello, Greg.
1129
00:49:46,942 --> 00:49:47,942
Hey.
1130
00:49:48,653 --> 00:49:49,986
Hey, Jack.
1131
00:49:50,696 --> 00:49:52,697
You mind explaining this?
1132
00:49:54,950 --> 00:49:55,950
What is that?
1133
00:49:56,911 --> 00:49:58,578
Sustengo. Yeah, that's...
You know.
1134
00:49:59,163 --> 00:50:01,456
These drug companies,
they give me
all these free samples.
1135
00:50:02,124 --> 00:50:03,124
Is that it?
1136
00:50:04,418 --> 00:50:05,710
Or do you need
to use this
1137
00:50:05,795 --> 00:50:07,921
because you're no longer
sexually attracted to Pam?
1138
00:50:08,839 --> 00:50:12,425
You know what, Jack?
That's ridiculous.
1139
00:50:12,510 --> 00:50:13,677
Really. You know what?
1140
00:50:13,761 --> 00:50:15,970
I'm not even gonna
go there with you.
This is...
1141
00:50:16,639 --> 00:50:19,307
Have a good night,
all right?
I'm gonna go sleep.
1142
00:50:19,433 --> 00:50:21,434
Don't walk away
from me, Focker.
1143
00:50:25,856 --> 00:50:27,357
Jack, is everything okay
down there?
1144
00:50:27,942 --> 00:50:29,025
Everything's fine.
1145
00:50:29,110 --> 00:50:32,028
Okay. All right.
'Cause you seem
to have a little, I mean...
1146
00:50:32,113 --> 00:50:34,447
I know what I have, Greg,
and I'm not concerned
about that right now.
1147
00:50:34,532 --> 00:50:36,533
Right now, what I want
from you is the truth.
1148
00:50:38,244 --> 00:50:42,288
Jack, did you take
one of those pills?
1149
00:50:42,623 --> 00:50:44,290
Well, I was
highly preoccupied
1150
00:50:44,375 --> 00:50:45,417
and Dina wanted
to make love,
1151
00:50:45,501 --> 00:50:47,919
and the label clearly
states that it's safe
for heart patients.
1152
00:50:48,003 --> 00:50:49,504
Yes, but you need
a prescription
1153
00:50:49,588 --> 00:50:51,589
after you've had
a thorough examination.
1154
00:50:51,674 --> 00:50:54,175
How long have you had that...
The situation for?
1155
00:50:55,010 --> 00:50:56,094
Stop avoiding the question.
1156
00:50:56,178 --> 00:50:57,262
I'm not avoiding
the question.
1157
00:50:57,346 --> 00:50:58,888
If you've had that
for more than four hours,
1158
00:50:58,973 --> 00:51:02,058
you could bust a capillary
and have serious
permanent damage.
1159
00:51:02,143 --> 00:51:03,351
How long
have you had it?
1160
00:51:03,436 --> 00:51:04,894
Been a little longer
than four hours.
1161
00:51:04,979 --> 00:51:06,062
How long?
1162
00:51:06,147 --> 00:51:07,522
Maybe about five and a half.
1163
00:51:08,232 --> 00:51:09,899
Jack, you got to get
to an ER right now
1164
00:51:09,984 --> 00:51:11,735
and get a shot of adrenaline
to counteract that drug.
1165
00:51:11,819 --> 00:51:13,737
You're a nurse.
Don't you have that kind of
stuff in the house?
1166
00:51:13,821 --> 00:51:14,946
Yeah, I have an Epi kit,
1167
00:51:15,030 --> 00:51:16,698
but I'm not gonna give you
a shot there, okay?
1168
00:51:16,782 --> 00:51:19,242
Focker, there is no way
I'm going to an ER room
with this thing.
1169
00:51:19,326 --> 00:51:21,327
Now you need to stick me
and you need to stick me now!
1170
00:51:21,412 --> 00:51:22,495
I'm having a dick attack!
Stick me!
1171
00:51:22,580 --> 00:51:25,749
Shh. Just relax. Okay.
1172
00:51:25,833 --> 00:51:26,875
I'll get the needle.
1173
00:51:32,006 --> 00:51:36,134
All right. I need you
to drop your pants.
1174
00:51:37,052 --> 00:51:39,763
What kind of sick drug
are you dealing
to your patients?
1175
00:51:39,847 --> 00:51:41,848
Jack, I told you,
I took home some samples.
1176
00:51:42,266 --> 00:51:43,600
All right?
Maybe read the label
1177
00:51:43,684 --> 00:51:45,435
before you just pick up
a drug and eat it.
1178
00:51:45,519 --> 00:51:46,519
Let's just do it.
1179
00:51:48,022 --> 00:51:49,731
I'm gonna
administer the shot
on the count of three.
1180
00:51:50,858 --> 00:51:52,484
Just... All right?
1181
00:51:55,196 --> 00:51:56,613
Okay. Just...
1182
00:51:56,697 --> 00:51:57,781
It's...
1183
00:51:57,865 --> 00:51:58,948
Your hands are cold.
1184
00:51:59,033 --> 00:52:00,742
I'm sorry.
It's a bit...
1185
00:52:00,826 --> 00:52:02,035
Okay.
1186
00:52:03,704 --> 00:52:04,913
One,
1187
00:52:06,373 --> 00:52:07,540
two,
1188
00:52:08,167 --> 00:52:09,250
three.
1189
00:52:09,335 --> 00:52:11,753
Focker!
1190
00:52:14,215 --> 00:52:15,507
Shit!
Shit!
1191
00:52:19,845 --> 00:52:21,513
Wait, what's going on?
What happened?
1192
00:52:21,597 --> 00:52:23,807
Everything's fine.
Henry had
a little nightmare,
1193
00:52:23,891 --> 00:52:25,433
but Greg's got him
settled down, okay.
1194
00:52:25,518 --> 00:52:27,393
No, no, Jack,
I thought I heard you
screaming, too.
1195
00:52:27,478 --> 00:52:29,312
No, you didn't.
It was all Henry.
1196
00:52:29,396 --> 00:52:30,647
Well, let me go
check on him...
No, no, no.
1197
00:52:30,731 --> 00:52:32,357
...and make sure he's okay.
You guys go to sleep.
1198
00:52:32,441 --> 00:52:34,150
Everything's under control.
1199
00:52:38,739 --> 00:52:40,865
Could you and Dad
keep it down, please?
1200
00:52:41,909 --> 00:52:45,245
Here's Sirius Black.
Here's Orange Ninja, okay?
1201
00:52:45,955 --> 00:52:47,413
You all right?
Yeah.
1202
00:52:47,498 --> 00:52:48,915
JACK: Greg?
Yeah.
1203
00:52:49,834 --> 00:52:51,417
How's he doing?
He's all right.
1204
00:52:51,502 --> 00:52:53,878
You know, he's
a little shaken up, but...
1205
00:52:53,963 --> 00:52:56,840
Greg, I was involved
in some covert
CIA-sponsored
1206
00:52:56,924 --> 00:52:59,092
mind-altering techniques
back in the '70s.
1207
00:52:59,176 --> 00:53:00,844
I'd like a few minutes
alone with him
1208
00:53:00,928 --> 00:53:03,096
just to erase what
he saw from his memory.
1209
00:53:03,430 --> 00:53:05,431
You're not gonna erase
my son's memory.
1210
00:53:05,516 --> 00:53:09,185
Greg, he saw his father
inject a needle into his
grandfather's penis.
1211
00:53:09,270 --> 00:53:13,022
He already has issues.
That's something he might
never recover from.
1212
00:53:13,107 --> 00:53:15,233
I'll handle it, okay?
All right?
1213
00:53:15,317 --> 00:53:16,317
Okay, thank you.
1214
00:53:18,863 --> 00:53:21,072
Hey, buddy.
1215
00:53:21,156 --> 00:53:24,993
So, you know how sometimes
you need help when you...
1216
00:53:26,245 --> 00:53:27,829
When you make a wee-wee?
Yeah.
1217
00:53:27,913 --> 00:53:30,373
Well, when you get to be
Grandpa Jack's age,
1218
00:53:30,457 --> 00:53:33,042
sometimes you need help
making a wee-wee, too.
1219
00:53:33,127 --> 00:53:34,294
So that's what you
saw me doing.
1220
00:53:34,378 --> 00:53:37,255
I was helping Grandpa Jack
because he's old.
1221
00:53:38,841 --> 00:53:40,800
Well, why did
he scream so loud?
1222
00:53:41,594 --> 00:53:44,846
He wasn't screaming.
He was celebrating,
he was just so happy.
1223
00:53:44,930 --> 00:53:50,226
He was, like, "Focker.
Thanks for helping me
make a wee-wee."
1224
00:53:50,811 --> 00:53:52,979
He just...
He was so happy.
Right, right?
1225
00:53:53,063 --> 00:53:54,230
Right, Greg.
1226
00:53:54,315 --> 00:53:55,982
Yeah.
JACK: Understand?
1227
00:53:56,275 --> 00:53:57,734
I think so.
GREG: Good.
1228
00:54:02,239 --> 00:54:04,866
Don't think this incident
is distracting me, Focker.
1229
00:54:04,950 --> 00:54:07,744
I know
you're up to something
and I'm watching you.
1230
00:54:08,495 --> 00:54:11,581
Well, guess what?
I have eyes, too.
1231
00:54:11,665 --> 00:54:16,294
So, I'll be watching you,
watching me.
1232
00:54:17,004 --> 00:54:18,254
Okay.
All right?
1233
00:54:18,339 --> 00:54:19,589
Fair enough.
Good.
1234
00:54:19,673 --> 00:54:21,090
So we just watch
each other, all right?
1235
00:54:21,175 --> 00:54:22,508
Okay, okay.
1236
00:54:29,850 --> 00:54:31,017
I'm watching you right now.
1237
00:54:44,156 --> 00:54:46,199
MAN: Domsey's Bakery.
How can l help you?
1238
00:54:46,909 --> 00:54:51,245
Hello, yes, do you still
have the pineapple
upside-down cake?
1239
00:54:51,330 --> 00:54:54,165
Yes, we do.
Would you like chocolate
or vanilla frosting?
1240
00:54:54,541 --> 00:54:57,043
Neither. I'm only
interested in merengue.
1241
00:54:58,045 --> 00:55:00,046
Please give me
your access code
and releasing lD.
1242
00:55:00,130 --> 00:55:04,175
This is Santa.
Releasing ID 7726548.
1243
00:55:05,386 --> 00:55:07,136
I need all-source,
derogatory only,
1244
00:55:07,221 --> 00:55:09,180
on a person
named Andi Garcia.
1245
00:55:09,264 --> 00:55:11,057
Alpha November
Delta Indigo...
1246
00:55:11,141 --> 00:55:14,227
Santa, your clearances
haven't been active
for 1 2 years.
1247
00:55:14,895 --> 00:55:16,562
Now, you listen to me,
Young Turk.
1248
00:55:16,647 --> 00:55:18,314
I was bugging
Ho Chi Minh's sock drawer
1249
00:55:18,399 --> 00:55:19,649
while you were
still in diapers,
1250
00:55:19,733 --> 00:55:21,401
so don't tell me
about clearances.
1251
00:55:21,485 --> 00:55:23,152
Sir, my hands are tied.
1252
00:55:23,237 --> 00:55:25,822
But, l mean,
you could probably
just google the subject
1253
00:55:25,906 --> 00:55:28,241
and find out everything
you need to know.
1254
00:55:29,743 --> 00:55:32,203
Then I'll do that.
Santa out.
1255
00:56:01,150 --> 00:56:04,902
Honey, I can't wait
to see Kevin's timeshare
later today, huh?
1256
00:56:05,446 --> 00:56:07,697
Yeah. Yeah.
1257
00:56:07,781 --> 00:56:08,906
What you doing?
1258
00:56:09,575 --> 00:56:11,034
Just checking
the weather.
1259
00:56:11,118 --> 00:56:12,452
There's a cold front
coming in.
1260
00:56:12,536 --> 00:56:13,619
No.
1261
00:56:13,704 --> 00:56:14,746
Yeah.
1262
00:56:21,712 --> 00:56:22,920
Thanks.
1263
00:56:24,882 --> 00:56:25,923
DINA: Greg.
1264
00:56:26,592 --> 00:56:28,051
Hey, how you doing?
Sorry, I'm late.
1265
00:56:28,135 --> 00:56:29,260
Hi, honey.
1266
00:56:30,471 --> 00:56:32,055
A little emergency
at the hospital.
1267
00:56:32,139 --> 00:56:34,474
Kevin was showing us
his magnificent estate.
1268
00:56:34,558 --> 00:56:35,600
GREG: It's really nice.
1269
00:56:35,684 --> 00:56:36,726
So this is where
you rough it
1270
00:56:36,810 --> 00:56:38,061
when you're not at
the homeless shelter?
1271
00:56:38,145 --> 00:56:40,772
Kind of split time
between the two.
Maybe 60/40 here.
1272
00:56:40,856 --> 00:56:42,815
Really?
Now that Greg's
finally arrived,
1273
00:56:42,900 --> 00:56:44,776
why don't I take you over
to see the meadow?
1274
00:56:54,536 --> 00:56:55,578
JACK: Yeah, this is perfect.
1275
00:56:55,662 --> 00:56:57,246
This is impressive.
GREG: Wow, nice backyard.
1276
00:56:57,331 --> 00:56:58,706
JACK: Yeah, love it.
PAM: Wow, it is.
1277
00:56:58,791 --> 00:56:59,832
Thank you.
1278
00:56:59,958 --> 00:57:01,542
JACK: Let's reserve that
quadrant over there, Kevin.
1279
00:57:01,627 --> 00:57:03,127
It's perfect for
the three-legged race,
1280
00:57:03,212 --> 00:57:04,545
egg toss,
capture-the-flag game.
1281
00:57:04,630 --> 00:57:08,549
Why don't we put up
a ring of bouncy castles
right out there
1282
00:57:08,634 --> 00:57:10,510
and we have, like,
a relay race for the kids
1283
00:57:10,594 --> 00:57:12,929
kind of intertwined
in between them.
1284
00:57:13,013 --> 00:57:14,097
Loving it, Kev-O.
1285
00:57:14,181 --> 00:57:16,182
Kevin, is that
a tattoo on your back?
1286
00:57:16,266 --> 00:57:17,433
Yes, it is, Dina.
1287
00:57:17,518 --> 00:57:19,685
It looks really elaborate.
Could we take a look at it?
1288
00:57:19,770 --> 00:57:21,062
Sure.
PAM: Mom.
1289
00:57:21,146 --> 00:57:23,022
Well, it's a curiosity.
1290
00:57:24,358 --> 00:57:26,109
My gosh.
1291
00:57:29,113 --> 00:57:30,363
DINA: Wow.
1292
00:57:31,031 --> 00:57:32,365
Is that Pam?
1293
00:57:32,449 --> 00:57:33,783
Yeah, it is.
1294
00:57:33,867 --> 00:57:35,618
You know,
after the whole
Svetlana episode,
1295
00:57:35,702 --> 00:57:37,870
I went on a little bit of
a drunken bender
1296
00:57:37,955 --> 00:57:40,957
and wound up in
a tattoo shop in Moscow.
1297
00:57:41,041 --> 00:57:42,792
And I asked
the artist to ink me
1298
00:57:42,876 --> 00:57:44,293
with the image
of the one woman
1299
00:57:44,378 --> 00:57:47,046
who's always loved me
unconditionally.
1300
00:57:47,131 --> 00:57:48,881
Pam.
My grandmother.
1301
00:57:49,424 --> 00:57:51,467
The point being,
in my drunken stupor,
1302
00:57:51,552 --> 00:57:53,970
I must have handed him
a photo of Pam instead.
1303
00:57:54,263 --> 00:57:56,180
You carry a picture
of Pam in your wallet.
1304
00:57:56,265 --> 00:57:58,391
I do. I carry pictures
of many treasured friends
1305
00:57:58,475 --> 00:57:59,725
and loved ones
on my travels.
1306
00:58:00,644 --> 00:58:01,853
Got a picture of me?
1307
00:58:01,937 --> 00:58:03,980
Of course I got
a picture of you.
1308
00:58:04,064 --> 00:58:06,190
You recognize this
mensch right here?
1309
00:58:06,900 --> 00:58:08,484
There I am. Kind of.
There you are, yeah.
1310
00:58:08,569 --> 00:58:09,819
That's...
Interesting.
1311
00:58:09,903 --> 00:58:11,696
This is actually
a very flattering portrait
of you, Pam-cake.
1312
00:58:12,906 --> 00:58:13,865
Excuse me.
Dad.
1313
00:58:13,949 --> 00:58:15,283
Prudence? Yes! Hello!
1314
00:58:15,367 --> 00:58:16,367
Yeah, hold on, honey.
I don't...
1315
00:58:17,411 --> 00:58:20,079
Terrific. Okay,
yes, thanks, Pru.
1316
00:58:20,747 --> 00:58:23,666
That was Prudence
and she says if you
get to E. H.S. by 3:00,
1317
00:58:23,750 --> 00:58:25,293
she can squeeze you in
for an interview.
1318
00:58:25,377 --> 00:58:26,836
PAM: All right,
that's great!
Way to go, Kev-O.
1319
00:58:26,920 --> 00:58:28,254
PAM: Thank you, Kevin.
GREG: Good job.
1320
00:58:31,133 --> 00:58:32,758
So great you two
could join us.
1321
00:58:33,051 --> 00:58:35,970
Really wonderful
when grandparents
play an integral role
1322
00:58:36,054 --> 00:58:37,930
in early humans' lives.
We love them.
1323
00:58:38,015 --> 00:58:39,599
Early humans
do need guidance.
1324
00:58:40,267 --> 00:58:42,977
Is that your role, Jack?
To guide them?
1325
00:58:43,061 --> 00:58:45,188
Yes, I see myself
as something of a shepherd,
1326
00:58:45,272 --> 00:58:47,982
guiding our family
through life's pastures.
1327
00:58:48,066 --> 00:58:51,360
Yes, I would say
Jack is sort of
an honorary shepherd.
1328
00:58:51,445 --> 00:58:54,614
Kind of a shepherd
emeritus, if you will.
1329
00:58:54,948 --> 00:58:59,118
Well, when my sheep wander,
I use my prod to keep
my flock in line.
1330
00:59:00,621 --> 00:59:04,457
There are a lot
of family dynamics
at play here.
1331
00:59:05,250 --> 00:59:07,043
Why don't we begin
the interview process?
1332
00:59:08,170 --> 00:59:12,006
Okay, Henry,
I just want you
to clear your mind
1333
00:59:12,424 --> 00:59:16,594
and draw a picture for me
of the first thing
that comes to mind
1334
00:59:16,678 --> 00:59:19,597
when you hear
the word "family."
1335
00:59:22,059 --> 00:59:23,726
This is just like being
at the eye doctor.
1336
00:59:23,810 --> 00:59:25,770
Start at the top
and work your way down.
1337
00:59:25,938 --> 00:59:27,647
Why would she
give her an eye test?
1338
00:59:27,731 --> 00:59:29,899
It's called
a Heisenreich Experiment.
1339
00:59:29,983 --> 00:59:31,567
We used it
at the agency to test
1340
00:59:31,652 --> 00:59:33,319
the aptitude of
potential recruits.
1341
00:59:34,821 --> 00:59:37,740
All the letters are the same,
so it's not really
an eye test.
1342
00:59:39,243 --> 00:59:41,494
Very impressive
cognition, Samantha.
1343
00:59:41,787 --> 00:59:44,163
E... E...
1344
00:59:45,791 --> 00:59:48,542
E? I need to start over.
1345
00:59:50,212 --> 00:59:53,422
Okay, Henry,
let's see what
you've chosen to draw.
1346
00:59:54,925 --> 00:59:56,092
What is it?
What did he draw?
1347
00:59:58,637 --> 01:00:02,807
Dad stuck Grandpa Jack
in the wee-wee last night.
Because he's old.
1348
01:00:03,183 --> 01:00:04,684
I'm sorry?
What did he say?
1349
01:00:04,768 --> 01:00:06,060
I didn't hear him.
1350
01:00:06,436 --> 01:00:08,354
Something about
Grandpa Jack having a cold.
1351
01:00:08,730 --> 01:00:10,690
So tell me about
your parents, Samantha.
1352
01:00:11,275 --> 01:00:13,526
Tell me about
your parents, Prudence.
1353
01:00:17,322 --> 01:00:18,364
That's my girl.
1354
01:00:18,740 --> 01:00:20,408
Wanna tell me
about your family?
1355
01:00:20,492 --> 01:00:21,784
My dad is a great guy.
1356
01:00:22,035 --> 01:00:23,077
Thank you, buddy.
1357
01:00:24,037 --> 01:00:27,123
But Grandpa Jack makes him
really, really scared.
1358
01:00:27,207 --> 01:00:29,125
So he acts all crazy
when he's with him.
1359
01:00:29,209 --> 01:00:32,295
Like he tried
to cut the turkey
with Grandpa's big knife
1360
01:00:32,379 --> 01:00:37,258
and he slipped
and he cut his finger.
And he was like, "Shit!"
1361
01:00:39,386 --> 01:00:41,012
He's blowing
the interview.
1362
01:00:41,096 --> 01:00:43,389
She's setting him up to fail
with these questions.
1363
01:00:43,473 --> 01:00:45,725
I mean,
Sam's a better tester,
anyway, so...
1364
01:00:45,809 --> 01:00:47,476
Well, that's because
she takes after...
1365
01:00:47,561 --> 01:00:48,894
Takes after who, Jack?
1366
01:00:48,979 --> 01:00:51,314
Let's just say
I've done some
research on twins.
1367
01:00:51,398 --> 01:00:52,857
There's a theory that
in certain cases,
1368
01:00:52,941 --> 01:00:55,484
one twin gets
an extra chromosome
from the father,
1369
01:00:55,569 --> 01:00:57,528
while the other sibling
gets an extra chromosome
1370
01:00:57,612 --> 01:00:58,738
from the mother's side.
1371
01:01:00,073 --> 01:01:02,033
Sam might be
three quarters Byrnes,
1372
01:01:02,117 --> 01:01:03,576
whereas Henry
could very well have
1373
01:01:03,660 --> 01:01:05,494
a double dose
of Focker in him.
1374
01:01:06,872 --> 01:01:08,289
And what if he does?
1375
01:01:08,790 --> 01:01:10,958
My Grandpa Bernie
taught me this.
Pull my finger.
1376
01:01:15,839 --> 01:01:16,881
Double dose.
1377
01:01:19,426 --> 01:01:22,178
Let's go out to the courtyard
for some free play.
1378
01:01:23,430 --> 01:01:25,848
I mean, what is
"free-play test"?
1379
01:01:25,932 --> 01:01:27,266
How well they hang
on the monkey bars?
1380
01:01:27,351 --> 01:01:28,434
I don't think
you get it, Greg.
1381
01:01:28,977 --> 01:01:30,353
You know when
prison guards
learn the most
1382
01:01:30,437 --> 01:01:32,772
about their inmate
population?
1383
01:01:32,856 --> 01:01:34,106
During rec time
in the yard.
1384
01:01:34,566 --> 01:01:36,233
I'm sure Prudence is
in her office right now
1385
01:01:36,318 --> 01:01:37,943
watching every move
these kids make.
1386
01:01:39,613 --> 01:01:40,696
Dad?
Yeah.
1387
01:01:40,781 --> 01:01:42,823
Can I please go climb
that big rock wall?
1388
01:01:42,908 --> 01:01:44,367
Yeah, okay.
Just be careful,
buddy, all right?
1389
01:01:44,451 --> 01:01:45,826
All right.
1390
01:01:45,911 --> 01:01:47,370
Do you think
he can handle that?
1391
01:01:47,454 --> 01:01:48,704
What's the big deal?
1392
01:01:48,789 --> 01:01:51,248
I'm just not sure
you've instilled
the physical confidence
1393
01:01:51,333 --> 01:01:52,875
for him to shear
a face like that.
1394
01:01:53,293 --> 01:01:56,837
Jack, do me a favor.
Just let go of the reins
a little, okay?
1395
01:01:57,297 --> 01:01:59,882
I'll let go, Greg,
when you show me,
once and for all,
1396
01:01:59,966 --> 01:02:01,467
that you have
what it takes to lead.
1397
01:02:02,010 --> 01:02:04,178
I am in control
of my family, all right?
1398
01:02:04,262 --> 01:02:07,014
If I give Henry permission
to climb a wall,
he can climb a wall.
1399
01:02:07,099 --> 01:02:09,266
If he says
he wants to climb
the Empire State Building
1400
01:02:09,351 --> 01:02:10,518
and I say it's okay,
1401
01:02:10,602 --> 01:02:12,144
it's okay,
because I'm in charge.
1402
01:02:12,229 --> 01:02:14,271
All right?
I'm calling the plays now.
1403
01:02:14,356 --> 01:02:17,650
So you just got to step back
and accept the fact
that I have got this.
1404
01:02:17,734 --> 01:02:18,734
HENRY: Whoa!
1405
01:02:20,904 --> 01:02:23,614
He is such
a brave boy, isn't he?
1406
01:02:23,698 --> 01:02:26,200
See, it's not so bad.
It's just a slight fracture.
1407
01:02:26,326 --> 01:02:27,618
Okay, thanks.
1408
01:02:27,702 --> 01:02:28,702
Hey, Henry,
are you doing all right?
1409
01:02:30,914 --> 01:02:32,873
Hey, I came
as soon as I heard.
1410
01:02:32,958 --> 01:02:36,085
Prudence told me
there was a little bit of
a kerfuffle over at E. H.S.
1411
01:02:36,169 --> 01:02:38,087
That's an understatement.
Thanks to Greg,
1412
01:02:38,171 --> 01:02:40,464
we can wave goodbye
to their educational future.
1413
01:02:40,549 --> 01:02:41,590
DINA: Jack.
1414
01:02:41,675 --> 01:02:42,925
KEVIN: No, no.
Pru's a forgiving soul.
1415
01:02:43,009 --> 01:02:45,261
I think I can
patch things up.
In the meantime,
1416
01:02:45,345 --> 01:02:47,805
I got a little something
for Hank the Tank here.
1417
01:02:48,223 --> 01:02:51,183
Someone to
keep you company until
you're reunited with Arthur.
1418
01:02:52,018 --> 01:02:53,853
What is that?
Thanks, Papa Kev.
1419
01:02:54,271 --> 01:02:55,479
Papa Kev?
1420
01:02:55,564 --> 01:02:56,730
Yeah, old fraternity nickname.
1421
01:02:56,815 --> 01:03:00,234
I told Hank the Tank here
he could call me
by that handle.
1422
01:03:00,318 --> 01:03:02,987
You're not Hank the Tank.
Nobody calls him
Hank the Tank.
1423
01:03:03,363 --> 01:03:04,363
You wanna be Papa Greg?
1424
01:03:04,448 --> 01:03:07,491
No, I am Papa... I'm Greg.
I'm Greg, his papa.
1425
01:03:07,576 --> 01:03:08,659
So I don't need
to be Papa Greg.
1426
01:03:08,743 --> 01:03:10,411
I don't need to
put a little thing
in front of it.
1427
01:03:10,495 --> 01:03:11,579
WOMAN ON PA:
Paging Nurse Focker.
1428
01:03:11,663 --> 01:03:13,289
Pam, we need to talk
for a minute.
1429
01:03:13,707 --> 01:03:14,748
Okay. Mom?
1430
01:03:17,711 --> 01:03:19,128
Hey, Louis, what's up?
1431
01:03:19,212 --> 01:03:21,380
What up, dawg?
Hey, hottie at 2:00.
1432
01:03:21,465 --> 01:03:22,590
There's the superstar!
1433
01:03:22,674 --> 01:03:23,716
Hey, hi, hi.
1434
01:03:23,800 --> 01:03:25,176
Hey!
Hello.
1435
01:03:25,886 --> 01:03:27,761
I have the raddest
news ever!
1436
01:03:27,846 --> 01:03:29,221
Really? Okay.
1437
01:03:29,639 --> 01:03:32,141
So our VP of marketing
heard how well you did
1438
01:03:32,225 --> 01:03:34,185
on your speech last night
and guess what?
1439
01:03:34,269 --> 01:03:35,311
What?
1440
01:03:35,395 --> 01:03:39,315
He wants us to lead
the Pfosten convention
in Maui next month.
1441
01:03:39,524 --> 01:03:41,609
Yeah, that sounds great.
Honestly, I'm sorry.
1442
01:03:41,693 --> 01:03:42,860
I'm just a little
distracted right now
1443
01:03:42,944 --> 01:03:44,111
'cause my son just
broke his arm and...
1444
01:03:44,196 --> 01:03:45,279
Poor baby.
1445
01:03:45,363 --> 01:03:46,489
Yeah, so...
1446
01:03:46,573 --> 01:03:47,656
You're a super dad.
1447
01:03:47,741 --> 01:03:50,659
No, I'm not a super dad.
It is so cute
1448
01:03:50,744 --> 01:03:53,037
how involved you are
with your kids.
1449
01:03:53,121 --> 01:03:56,373
No, no, no,
that's just what dads do.
It's not like a super...
1450
01:03:56,458 --> 01:03:58,375
Louis! What are you doing?
Is this the book?
1451
01:03:58,460 --> 01:03:59,919
What is...
No, go. Come on.
1452
01:04:00,003 --> 01:04:01,962
In the back, right?
I got them.
1453
01:04:02,881 --> 01:04:04,173
Sorry, it's just...
1454
01:04:04,257 --> 01:04:05,549
Somebody's grumpy.
1455
01:04:06,009 --> 01:04:07,676
I'm gonna make this
brief, Pam-cake.
1456
01:04:07,761 --> 01:04:08,969
I'm not getting
any younger.
1457
01:04:09,054 --> 01:04:10,513
Dad.
No, I want to make sure
1458
01:04:10,597 --> 01:04:13,516
there's someone around
besides me who you can
fully count on.
1459
01:04:13,600 --> 01:04:15,392
I couldn't help but notice
how you and Kevin
1460
01:04:15,477 --> 01:04:17,561
have reconnected
these past few days.
1461
01:04:17,646 --> 01:04:20,064
He's financially secure.
He's great with the twins.
1462
01:04:20,148 --> 01:04:21,190
Got a heart of gold.
1463
01:04:21,608 --> 01:04:23,150
He's a little goofy,
maybe, in his dressing,
1464
01:04:23,235 --> 01:04:24,693
but if that body art
is any indication,
1465
01:04:24,778 --> 01:04:26,570
I'd say he's certainly
open to the idea.
1466
01:04:27,614 --> 01:04:28,697
What idea?
1467
01:04:29,699 --> 01:04:32,535
The idea of a simple
course correction.
1468
01:04:33,537 --> 01:04:35,120
A course correction.
1469
01:04:35,205 --> 01:04:37,248
Greg, Kevin.
1470
01:04:39,417 --> 01:04:41,794
Come on, grumpy daddy!
Come to Hawaii.
1471
01:04:41,878 --> 01:04:43,045
Okay.
1472
01:04:43,129 --> 01:04:44,755
Okay, grumpy daddy
will think about it.
1473
01:04:44,839 --> 01:04:46,048
Yes!
Okay, okay.
1474
01:04:46,132 --> 01:04:48,133
Hey, honey, hi!
1475
01:04:48,552 --> 01:04:52,638
Perfect. Pam, this is Andi.
Andi, this is Pam, my wife.
1476
01:04:53,098 --> 01:04:54,098
Hey.
1477
01:04:54,182 --> 01:04:56,267
Hi, it's a...
It's a pleasure
to meet you.
1478
01:04:56,351 --> 01:04:57,977
It's a pleasure
to meet you, too.
1479
01:04:58,061 --> 01:04:59,895
Your husband
is a freaking rock star,
1480
01:04:59,980 --> 01:05:02,356
but I'm sure you know
how lucky you are.
1481
01:05:02,440 --> 01:05:04,316
Yeah.
I'm not.
She's the rock star.
1482
01:05:04,401 --> 01:05:07,987
She's a rock star mom
and just full-on,
rocking person.
1483
01:05:09,322 --> 01:05:10,698
And I'm just a groupie
1484
01:05:11,157 --> 01:05:14,493
trying to, you know,
carry her amps.
1485
01:05:14,703 --> 01:05:17,037
No, you're... You're...
You're the man.
1486
01:05:17,289 --> 01:05:19,206
Everything
all right here?
1487
01:05:20,041 --> 01:05:21,208
Yeah, Jack,
everything's all right.
1488
01:05:21,293 --> 01:05:23,460
Pam, do you wanna...
My God.
1489
01:05:23,545 --> 01:05:26,755
You must be
the famous Jack Byrnes.
1490
01:05:26,840 --> 01:05:29,675
Wow. I have heard
so much about you.
1491
01:05:30,510 --> 01:05:32,761
I've heard very little
about you, Miss Garcia.
1492
01:05:32,846 --> 01:05:35,097
But I do admire
your cheerleading
photographs.
1493
01:05:35,515 --> 01:05:36,932
Henry's doing much better.
1494
01:05:37,017 --> 01:05:39,101
We were just singing
an ancient Yanomamo song
1495
01:05:39,185 --> 01:05:41,186
about a brave warrior
who falls from a tree
1496
01:05:41,271 --> 01:05:43,564
while hunting
for chimpanzee meat.
1497
01:05:43,648 --> 01:05:45,649
He's good. Yeah.
1498
01:05:46,109 --> 01:05:47,610
Hi.
Hi.
1499
01:05:47,694 --> 01:05:50,154
Andi Garcia.
Pfosten Pharmaceuticals.
1500
01:05:50,864 --> 01:05:52,281
And you're Doctor...
1501
01:05:52,365 --> 01:05:53,741
No. He's not a doctor.
1502
01:05:53,825 --> 01:05:55,659
Not in the Western
sense of the word.
1503
01:05:55,910 --> 01:05:58,203
Not in any sense of the word.
You're an investment banker.
1504
01:05:58,997 --> 01:06:00,289
Many hats. Kevin.
1505
01:06:00,373 --> 01:06:01,373
Hi.
1506
01:06:02,876 --> 01:06:04,001
Okay, cool.
1507
01:06:04,085 --> 01:06:05,711
Well, I'm gonna
mosey on out of here.
1508
01:06:07,005 --> 01:06:08,005
All right.
1509
01:06:11,217 --> 01:06:13,010
Wow, you told me she sold
boner medicine, Greg.
1510
01:06:13,094 --> 01:06:14,178
You didn't tell me
she is boner medicine.
1511
01:06:14,262 --> 01:06:15,346
Pam, that's ridiculous.
1512
01:06:15,430 --> 01:06:17,640
You also said
you wouldn't pick her out
of a lineup, too.
1513
01:06:17,724 --> 01:06:19,183
Wouldn't pick her
out of a lineup?
1514
01:06:19,267 --> 01:06:20,601
Greg, that woman
is stunning!
1515
01:06:20,685 --> 01:06:22,061
He's covering, Kevin,
1516
01:06:22,145 --> 01:06:24,063
'cause he didn't want
Pam to get suspicious.
1517
01:06:24,189 --> 01:06:25,814
Dad.
Did you see the way
his carotid artery
1518
01:06:25,899 --> 01:06:27,232
throbbed when
he looked at her?
1519
01:06:27,275 --> 01:06:28,901
Dad.
Give me a break, Jack.
Come on.
1520
01:06:28,985 --> 01:06:30,319
Now this is what
I'm talking about, Pam.
1521
01:06:30,403 --> 01:06:32,363
I'm sorry,
but this man
cannot be trusted.
1522
01:06:32,447 --> 01:06:34,823
Could you
for once in your life
stay out of my marriage?
1523
01:06:34,908 --> 01:06:36,492
Greg, come on,
don't get hysterical.
1524
01:06:36,576 --> 01:06:38,494
I'm not getting hysterical.
He's getting hysterical.
1525
01:06:38,578 --> 01:06:40,496
Look, it's natural
to get a little tempted.
1526
01:06:40,580 --> 01:06:41,580
Nobody's tempted, nobody's...
1527
01:06:41,665 --> 01:06:42,915
Look, even our dear friend,
the Buddha,
1528
01:06:42,999 --> 01:06:44,166
had to pass through
some sorrow
1529
01:06:44,250 --> 01:06:45,584
on his way to enlightenment.
1530
01:06:45,669 --> 01:06:47,294
Our dear friend,
the Buddha?
1531
01:06:47,379 --> 01:06:49,004
How's he doing?
It's been so long.
1532
01:06:49,464 --> 01:06:50,631
Do you ever
listen to yourself?
1533
01:06:50,715 --> 01:06:51,840
I try not to.
1534
01:06:51,925 --> 01:06:54,134
I speak from the heart,
off the cuff,
like my man, JC,
1535
01:06:54,219 --> 01:06:55,427
at the Sermon on the Mount.
1536
01:06:55,512 --> 01:06:57,513
I think that's what
you've always
admired about me.
1537
01:06:57,597 --> 01:06:59,682
Well, I got news for you.
You're not Jesus.
1538
01:06:59,766 --> 01:07:01,392
Well, he may not be Jesus,
1539
01:07:01,476 --> 01:07:03,018
but he's a far better
choice for Pam
than you are, Greg.
1540
01:07:03,103 --> 01:07:04,228
Dad!
1541
01:07:04,312 --> 01:07:05,396
I'm sorry.
Would you stop
1542
01:07:05,438 --> 01:07:07,022
with the
course-correction stuff?
No, that's right...
1543
01:07:07,107 --> 01:07:08,482
What's the
course-correction stuff?
It's nothing.
1544
01:07:08,566 --> 01:07:09,817
I want to hear
all about it, Jack.
1545
01:07:09,901 --> 01:07:13,278
You're leading this family
onto rocky shoals, Focker,
1546
01:07:13,363 --> 01:07:14,613
and as captain
of the ship,
1547
01:07:14,698 --> 01:07:15,989
I'm steering us away
to safety.
1548
01:07:16,074 --> 01:07:18,158
Well, you know what?
You're not a ship's
captain, Jack.
1549
01:07:18,243 --> 01:07:20,786
We're people.
We're not on a boat,
we're in a hospital. Okay?
1550
01:07:20,870 --> 01:07:23,706
We're human beings
in a hospital
and you're not the captain.
1551
01:07:23,790 --> 01:07:26,375
Well, I may not be
the captain,
Gregory Focker,
1552
01:07:26,459 --> 01:07:28,168
but you're not
the Godfocker!
1553
01:07:29,629 --> 01:07:32,464
Good. 'Cause
I don't want to be
the stupid Godfocker.
1554
01:07:33,258 --> 01:07:36,802
I'm the Greg Focker, Jack!
All right? I am Greg Focker!
1555
01:07:36,886 --> 01:07:39,388
And by the way,
Dr. Bob told me you offered
him the job first.
1556
01:07:39,472 --> 01:07:40,889
Nice to know I was
your sloppy seconds.
1557
01:07:40,974 --> 01:07:42,349
You spoke to Dr. Bob?
1558
01:07:42,434 --> 01:07:44,059
Yeah, I did, Jack.
1559
01:07:44,144 --> 01:07:45,269
Had beers with him
last night.
1560
01:07:45,353 --> 01:07:46,353
He's in town
for a convention.
1561
01:07:46,438 --> 01:07:47,938
That's it. You're done.
1562
01:07:48,064 --> 01:07:49,398
You're done,
it's over, that's it.
You know what?
1563
01:07:49,482 --> 01:07:51,024
You can't tell me I'm done
because I already quit.
1564
01:07:51,109 --> 01:07:52,401
You're done.
I'm getting off the wheel.
1565
01:07:52,485 --> 01:07:53,485
What wheel?
The wheel!
1566
01:07:53,570 --> 01:07:55,404
The little hamster wheel
that we're all running up
1567
01:07:55,488 --> 01:07:57,781
to get a little taste
of your little water thingy!
1568
01:07:57,866 --> 01:07:58,907
Just, please,
approval! Approval!
1569
01:07:58,992 --> 01:08:00,033
What the hell
are you doing?
1570
01:08:00,118 --> 01:08:01,660
Please! Give me some
of the Jack... Yeah.
1571
01:08:01,745 --> 01:08:03,245
It's like a metaphor
for your approval...
1572
01:08:03,329 --> 01:08:04,747
Thank you for
clearing that up!
1573
01:08:04,831 --> 01:08:06,373
What are you even
doing here, Kevin?
1574
01:08:06,458 --> 01:08:07,875
I'm trying to help.
Why don't you get on
1575
01:08:07,959 --> 01:08:09,084
your stupid monster yacht
1576
01:08:09,169 --> 01:08:10,711
with your bubble-butt
Russian girlfriend
1577
01:08:10,795 --> 01:08:13,756
and do Jell-O shots
off of Deepak Chopra's butt?
1578
01:08:13,840 --> 01:08:16,216
Greg, don't drag Deepak
into this. Please, Greg.
1579
01:08:17,343 --> 01:08:21,180
Hey, Dina. Jack had
a heart attack two weeks ago.
Adiós, folks!
1580
01:08:28,813 --> 01:08:29,813
AUTOMATED VOICE: Going down.
1581
01:08:29,898 --> 01:08:30,898
Hey.
1582
01:08:31,691 --> 01:08:32,983
Hey.
You okay?
1583
01:08:34,652 --> 01:08:36,320
Yeah.
1584
01:08:36,404 --> 01:08:37,446
Need a ride?
1585
01:08:39,616 --> 01:08:41,867
Hey, it's Pam.
Leave me a message.
1586
01:08:41,951 --> 01:08:43,285
GREG: Hey, l'm gonna
sleep over
1587
01:08:43,369 --> 01:08:44,870
at the new house tonight,
all right?
1588
01:08:44,954 --> 01:08:47,164
l just can't deal
with your dad right now.
1589
01:08:50,460 --> 01:08:51,919
Are you sure
you're gonna be okay?
1590
01:08:52,003 --> 01:08:55,339
Yeah, I think I just
need to clear my head.
Thanks for the ride.
1591
01:08:55,423 --> 01:08:56,465
No problem.
1592
01:09:00,386 --> 01:09:03,013
Why am I the bad guy here?
Greg was the one
who was being dishonest.
1593
01:09:03,097 --> 01:09:06,517
Please. All Greg
did was downplay
that woman's looks,
1594
01:09:06,601 --> 01:09:08,977
so Pam wouldn't be jealous,
and you know it.
1595
01:09:09,062 --> 01:09:10,270
You know you did
the same thing
1596
01:09:10,355 --> 01:09:12,606
with that gorgeous
double agent in Helsinki
1597
01:09:12,690 --> 01:09:13,774
during the Cold War.
1598
01:09:13,858 --> 01:09:16,109
You're still bringing up
Aatukka Kokkonen.
1599
01:09:16,194 --> 01:09:18,612
I told you her beauty
was privileged information.
1600
01:09:18,696 --> 01:09:20,322
It was a matter of
national security.
1601
01:09:20,406 --> 01:09:22,783
Yes.
Like your heart condition?
1602
01:09:22,867 --> 01:09:23,951
Listen, Jack.
1603
01:09:24,744 --> 01:09:26,870
Greg cares about his family
1604
01:09:26,955 --> 01:09:30,082
just as much as you care
about yours. All right?
1605
01:09:40,301 --> 01:09:41,385
Pam?
1606
01:09:48,768 --> 01:09:51,728
Don't be mad. I totally
don't want to harass you.
1607
01:09:51,813 --> 01:09:54,982
You just seemed so sad,
I had to bring you
some treats.
1608
01:09:55,733 --> 01:09:57,734
Wow, thanks.
1609
01:09:58,319 --> 01:10:01,363
Some Chinese food.
Little wine.
1610
01:10:03,449 --> 01:10:04,908
No offense,
1611
01:10:04,993 --> 01:10:06,952
but does Pam
even realize
how dope you are?
1612
01:10:07,036 --> 01:10:10,205
Yeah, no.
I think she thinks I'm dope.
1613
01:10:10,290 --> 01:10:11,373
It's just, you know,
1614
01:10:12,625 --> 01:10:13,876
it just changes
when you have kids,
1615
01:10:13,960 --> 01:10:15,878
you know, because
everything becomes
focused around them.
1616
01:10:15,962 --> 01:10:17,546
Totally. And I'm sure
you're like,
1617
01:10:17,630 --> 01:10:19,798
"Hello! Can I have
some fun, too?"
1618
01:10:20,633 --> 01:10:23,552
Yeah, no. I mean,
it's fun, but it's just
a different kind of fun.
1619
01:10:23,636 --> 01:10:24,720
More wine.
1620
01:10:24,804 --> 01:10:27,222
It's not like
old single fun,
where you go out.
1621
01:10:27,307 --> 01:10:31,059
It's more like wake up
in the morning at 6:00,
make the kids breakfast.
1622
01:10:31,144 --> 01:10:32,853
You know, that kind of fun.
1623
01:10:32,937 --> 01:10:34,563
I love it. I mean,
they're so cute.
1624
01:10:34,647 --> 01:10:36,231
Like, the other day,
Henry came in
1625
01:10:36,316 --> 01:10:38,775
and he had his little
top hat on and said,
1626
01:10:38,860 --> 01:10:40,193
"I'm the mayor
of the kitchen."
1627
01:10:40,278 --> 01:10:41,862
He's gonna be the mayor?
1628
01:10:41,988 --> 01:10:44,281
Just out of
nowhere he got this idea
he wanted to be the mayor.
1629
01:10:44,365 --> 01:10:45,991
And then he came in
and he said,
1630
01:10:46,075 --> 01:10:49,369
"And here is a proclamation.
You cannot use
the 'frigerator."
1631
01:10:49,454 --> 01:10:53,123
And he had a sash on.
I think I have
a picture of it.
1632
01:10:53,207 --> 01:10:55,959
Yeah. I mean, I'm biased,
but he's very creative.
1633
01:10:57,545 --> 01:10:59,087
I'm going to
step out for a bit
1634
01:10:59,172 --> 01:11:00,631
and get some milk
for the morning.
1635
01:11:00,715 --> 01:11:03,592
Don't, Jack. We both know
that's not true.
1636
01:11:05,345 --> 01:11:07,596
I don't know why
I still think I can
get anything by you.
1637
01:11:08,222 --> 01:11:09,222
Mmm.
1638
01:11:10,475 --> 01:11:12,893
I'm going to find Greg.
I'm going to bring him home.
1639
01:11:12,977 --> 01:11:13,977
You know where he is?
1640
01:11:14,062 --> 01:11:15,103
I have an idea.
1641
01:11:16,397 --> 01:11:19,858
And for the record,
nothing ever happened
with Aatukka Kokkonen.
1642
01:11:21,486 --> 01:11:22,486
ANDI: Aw.
1643
01:11:22,570 --> 01:11:25,489
GREG: And this is
the play that she wrote
called Tropical Seas.
1644
01:11:25,573 --> 01:11:26,907
They're so cute.
1645
01:11:26,991 --> 01:11:28,283
Yeah. They really are.
1646
01:11:30,244 --> 01:11:31,411
That's you!
1647
01:11:31,496 --> 01:11:33,622
Yes. I am
an algae-seaweed-type plant.
1648
01:11:34,374 --> 01:11:35,874
You know,
I got to go home.
1649
01:11:35,959 --> 01:11:37,960
Yeah, I totally get that.
1650
01:11:42,006 --> 01:11:43,632
Andi, Andi, no, no, no.
1651
01:11:43,716 --> 01:11:44,716
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
1652
01:11:44,801 --> 01:11:45,926
Andi, I think I gave you
the wrong idea. No...
1653
01:12:13,079 --> 01:12:14,663
Greg, ever since
we tag-teamed
on that enema,
1654
01:12:14,747 --> 01:12:15,831
I've wanted you.
1655
01:12:15,915 --> 01:12:19,710
It was just an enema.
Really, I think you're
idealizing the enema.
1656
01:12:19,794 --> 01:12:22,170
Andi, you know what,
I think you might have had
a little too much wine.
1657
01:12:22,255 --> 01:12:26,425
Wine is fine, papi!
I took a few Sustengo.
1658
01:12:26,509 --> 01:12:28,760
You took a Sustengo?
Why would you do that?
1659
01:12:30,346 --> 01:12:31,596
That's crazy.
I'm gonna call a cab.
1660
01:12:35,768 --> 01:12:37,811
Can I see more pictures
of your kids?
1661
01:12:38,938 --> 01:12:42,357
Definitely not. You can't...
You got to put
your thing back on.
1662
01:12:42,442 --> 01:12:43,817
Don't be a grumpy daddy!
1663
01:12:43,901 --> 01:12:45,569
I'm not being a grumpy...
You got to...
1664
01:13:11,888 --> 01:13:14,222
No, Andi!
Andi, give me the phone!
1665
01:13:14,307 --> 01:13:16,016
You want it?
I do want it.
1666
01:13:16,100 --> 01:13:17,267
Come and get it.
I want... I...
1667
01:13:18,936 --> 01:13:20,687
Andi, it's not funny.
1668
01:13:21,022 --> 01:13:22,898
Let's go swimming!
1669
01:13:22,982 --> 01:13:24,107
Andi, no,
it's not a pool.
1670
01:13:24,192 --> 01:13:26,276
Is it heated?
Is there a grotto?
1671
01:13:26,360 --> 01:13:28,570
No, no, it's a pit!
Andi, don't do this.
1672
01:13:28,654 --> 01:13:30,864
Come on!
Put your clothes
back on. All right?
1673
01:13:30,948 --> 01:13:33,075
Andi, no!
That's not nice!
1674
01:13:33,159 --> 01:13:35,410
You don't throw
people's phones
in pits, okay?
1675
01:13:35,495 --> 01:13:36,578
You're mean!
1676
01:13:36,662 --> 01:13:38,080
Andi, put the clothes
back on! Come on!
1677
01:13:38,164 --> 01:13:39,498
I hate you!
1678
01:13:42,126 --> 01:13:43,835
Belly flop!
1679
01:14:06,442 --> 01:14:07,776
You really don't know
where Greg is?
1680
01:14:07,860 --> 01:14:10,445
Honey, I struck out.
1681
01:14:10,530 --> 01:14:13,031
I guess my skills
just aren't what
they used to be.
1682
01:14:13,116 --> 01:14:14,533
Look who it is.
There they are!
1683
01:14:14,617 --> 01:14:15,617
Hey, Kevin!
1684
01:14:15,701 --> 01:14:17,577
Kevin.
Quite a shindig.
1685
01:14:17,662 --> 01:14:19,788
Well, you only
turn five once.
1686
01:14:19,872 --> 01:14:21,123
Or twice, in this case.
1687
01:14:21,541 --> 01:14:24,209
Now, I've got a little
surprise for you, Jack.
Gustavo?
1688
01:14:26,254 --> 01:14:27,546
Is that who I think it is?
1689
01:14:27,630 --> 01:14:28,839
KEVIN: You'd better
believe it.
1690
01:14:28,923 --> 01:14:30,132
Jinxy!
1691
01:14:30,216 --> 01:14:32,008
When I heard about
your health issues
last night,
1692
01:14:32,093 --> 01:14:33,885
I knew I had to
fly him out here.
1693
01:14:33,970 --> 01:14:36,346
Kevin, incredibly
thoughtful of you.
Thank you.
1694
01:14:36,430 --> 01:14:38,515
How come Daddy's not here?
1695
01:14:38,599 --> 01:14:40,767
Is it because
I was mean to him?
1696
01:14:40,852 --> 01:14:43,687
No, honey,
absolutely not, sweetheart.
1697
01:14:43,771 --> 01:14:45,981
It's because
Grandpa was mean to him.
1698
01:14:46,065 --> 01:14:49,359
But he's coming! He's coming.
He will be here, okay?
1699
01:14:49,443 --> 01:14:51,403
So, let's go
have some more fun.
1700
01:14:51,487 --> 01:14:53,613
All right? Let's go.
Let's go see
what else there is.
1701
01:14:59,829 --> 01:15:01,204
BERNIE: Just wait one sec!
1702
01:15:02,748 --> 01:15:04,348
Gay!
1703
01:15:14,594 --> 01:15:15,635
Gay?
1704
01:15:16,846 --> 01:15:18,346
Dad.
What's that hole?
1705
01:15:18,431 --> 01:15:20,849
Why are you so muddy?
Where is everyone?
1706
01:15:20,933 --> 01:15:22,184
They're at Kevin's.
1707
01:15:22,268 --> 01:15:23,852
The party's over
at Kevin's.
I got to get over there.
1708
01:15:23,936 --> 01:15:25,896
The kids' party's at Kevin's?
I thought you were in Spain.
1709
01:15:25,980 --> 01:15:29,065
I was, but I can't miss
my little gazugas
turning five.
1710
01:15:29,150 --> 01:15:30,275
How are you?
1711
01:15:30,359 --> 01:15:32,944
Hey! Man.
I'm so sorry.
1712
01:15:33,988 --> 01:15:36,781
I was so messed up
last night.
1713
01:15:38,868 --> 01:15:39,910
Who's that?
1714
01:15:39,994 --> 01:15:41,286
That is...
Dad, that's Andi Garcia.
1715
01:15:41,412 --> 01:15:42,787
She's a work
colleague of mine.
1716
01:15:42,872 --> 01:15:44,206
Hi, Dad!
1717
01:15:44,290 --> 01:15:46,458
Yeah. She took
a few too many
prescription pills
1718
01:15:46,542 --> 01:15:47,667
and then she
pushed me in the pit.
1719
01:15:47,752 --> 01:15:50,045
Total party foul.
My bad on that one.
1720
01:15:50,129 --> 01:15:51,546
Garcia? Is that Spanish?
1721
01:15:51,631 --> 01:15:52,672
Okay, we got to go.
1722
01:15:52,757 --> 01:15:53,840
Yeah. My grandparents
are from Seville.
1723
01:15:53,925 --> 01:15:57,219
Are you kidding?
I was just in Seville,
mastering the flamenco!
1724
01:15:57,303 --> 01:15:58,386
No way!
Dad.
1725
01:15:58,471 --> 01:15:59,888
What? But I got to
show her a few moves.
1726
01:15:59,972 --> 01:16:01,264
Her grandparents
are from Seville.
1727
01:16:01,390 --> 01:16:02,849
Dad, no, no!
Dad, I got to go!
Okay.
1728
01:16:07,605 --> 01:16:08,897
Your dad's really good.
1729
01:16:08,981 --> 01:16:11,233
The faster you go indicates
an increase in sexual prowess.
1730
01:16:11,317 --> 01:16:12,484
Andi, good luck.
1731
01:16:16,239 --> 01:16:19,074
It's a good thing
you pulled me away.
I was starting to get a semi.
1732
01:16:19,158 --> 01:16:20,742
Dad, please.
It's involuntary.
1733
01:16:20,826 --> 01:16:24,329
It's the parasympathetic
nervous system.
Flamenco's very sexual.
1734
01:16:24,872 --> 01:16:26,539
Well, just so you know,
nothing happened with her.
1735
01:16:26,624 --> 01:16:29,417
I know that. We're Fockers.
That's not the way we roll.
1736
01:16:29,502 --> 01:16:32,504
But I know
something went down
with the family. You okay?
1737
01:16:32,588 --> 01:16:36,258
Yeah, just the usual
Jack stuff. You okay?
1738
01:16:36,342 --> 01:16:39,511
Your mom was right.
Man-opause. Makes me
act like a lunatic.
1739
01:16:39,595 --> 01:16:41,513
You know,
I get a little nutty.
1740
01:16:42,932 --> 01:16:44,599
Grandma Roz! Grandma Roz!
1741
01:16:44,684 --> 01:16:45,767
My God.
1742
01:16:45,851 --> 01:16:50,105
There she is!
My little scrunchie-munchie.
Let me look at you, baby.
1743
01:16:50,648 --> 01:16:53,775
You look so cute.
Do you mind if we
sit down, honey?
1744
01:16:53,859 --> 01:16:56,486
Have a little chat.
'Cause Grandma's feet hurt.
1745
01:16:56,904 --> 01:17:01,616
So, I hear
you're not speaking
to your father.
1746
01:17:01,701 --> 01:17:03,285
Is that true?
1747
01:17:03,369 --> 01:17:06,871
Well, let me
tell you something
about men, Samantha.
1748
01:17:07,373 --> 01:17:12,294
They... They...
They're told to be
tough and hard, you know?
1749
01:17:12,378 --> 01:17:16,256
But inside,
they're quite
soft and gooey.
1750
01:17:17,008 --> 01:17:19,259
Kind of like a cannoli.
1751
01:17:20,553 --> 01:17:22,762
A knish?
It's not exactly that.
1752
01:17:22,847 --> 01:17:26,474
It's more like
peanut butter and jelly
inside burnt toast.
1753
01:17:29,061 --> 01:17:31,813
And once you know that,
you can cut them
a little slack.
1754
01:17:32,064 --> 01:17:33,356
Besides, you'll have
plenty of time
1755
01:17:33,441 --> 01:17:34,691
to aggravate him
in your teens.
1756
01:17:34,775 --> 01:17:35,984
Grandma!
1757
01:17:36,068 --> 01:17:38,862
Hi, honey!
Look at you,
how big you got!
1758
01:17:38,946 --> 01:17:40,405
Hi, sweetheart.
1759
01:17:40,489 --> 01:17:43,408
Come here and give me
a Focker sandwich.
Okay, I'm the cheese.
1760
01:17:43,492 --> 01:17:45,118
We're cheese!
I'm the cheese.
1761
01:17:45,202 --> 01:17:47,078
No, I'm the cheese
and you're the bread.
1762
01:17:47,163 --> 01:17:48,496
We're sourdough.
1763
01:17:48,914 --> 01:17:51,541
Attention! Attention!
1764
01:18:06,932 --> 01:18:10,060
Henry and Samantha!
Today you are five!
1765
01:18:16,067 --> 01:18:17,817
This way.
Okay, thank you.
1766
01:18:21,947 --> 01:18:23,031
Dad.
1767
01:18:23,616 --> 01:18:24,908
Yeah.
You coming?
1768
01:18:24,992 --> 01:18:26,451
Yeah. I just want
to practice the dance
1769
01:18:26,535 --> 01:18:27,911
I'm gonna surprise
your mother with.
1770
01:18:27,995 --> 01:18:28,995
Go ahead.
1771
01:18:29,080 --> 01:18:30,121
Okay. I'll see you
down there.
1772
01:18:30,206 --> 01:18:31,289
Gay?
1773
01:18:32,208 --> 01:18:34,417
My two cents.
The way to deal with Jack,
1774
01:18:34,502 --> 01:18:37,212
no matter what he does,
just smother
that guy with kisses.
1775
01:18:37,296 --> 01:18:38,296
He'll be putty
in your hands.
1776
01:18:38,381 --> 01:18:39,381
Good.
1777
01:18:39,465 --> 01:18:41,049
Love, love, love.
Good, putty, thank you.
1778
01:18:41,133 --> 01:18:42,634
Gay.
Yes.
1779
01:18:44,345 --> 01:18:45,428
You look good.
1780
01:18:45,513 --> 01:18:46,554
Thank you.
1781
01:18:47,807 --> 01:18:49,015
All right.
1782
01:18:52,853 --> 01:18:54,229
Can you do me a favor?
Okay.
1783
01:18:54,313 --> 01:18:57,399
Can you just put
this leg down slowly?
It's an old sex injury.
1784
01:18:57,483 --> 01:18:58,566
Like this?
Yeah.
1785
01:19:01,654 --> 01:19:02,654
My gosh.
1786
01:19:04,448 --> 01:19:06,950
This performance
is my gift to you!
1787
01:19:07,701 --> 01:19:09,077
You are the chosen ones!
1788
01:19:09,161 --> 01:19:10,161
Pam.
1789
01:19:12,540 --> 01:19:14,082
Pam!
Greg.
1790
01:19:14,166 --> 01:19:16,126
KEVIN: I pronounce
this your day!
1791
01:19:16,210 --> 01:19:17,544
What happened to you?
1792
01:19:17,628 --> 01:19:19,212
It's... I...
1793
01:19:20,673 --> 01:19:22,382
I'll tell you
about it later, okay?
1794
01:19:22,466 --> 01:19:24,467
Look, I'm really sorry
about what happened.
1795
01:19:24,552 --> 01:19:25,718
I just...
I'm sorry, too.
1796
01:19:25,803 --> 01:19:28,263
I let everything
get out of control
and I shouldn't have.
1797
01:19:28,347 --> 01:19:29,973
It's just...
It's just your dad.
1798
01:19:30,057 --> 01:19:31,933
You know, I...
I know. He's insane.
1799
01:19:32,935 --> 01:19:34,853
Yes. Yes.
1800
01:19:36,188 --> 01:19:38,690
Listen to me.
We've got our
own thing and it works.
1801
01:19:39,775 --> 01:19:40,942
It does, right?
1802
01:19:41,026 --> 01:19:43,278
Yeah, we actually
kind of know
what we're doing.
1803
01:19:43,362 --> 01:19:45,029
I love you.
I love you.
1804
01:19:49,201 --> 01:19:51,578
Hey, Sam! Happy birthday.
1805
01:19:51,662 --> 01:19:53,204
Look, I know
you don't want
to talk to me.
1806
01:19:53,289 --> 01:19:55,039
I just want you
to know that's okay.
1807
01:19:55,124 --> 01:19:56,958
I love you anyway.
1808
01:19:57,042 --> 01:19:58,084
I know, Daddy.
1809
01:20:02,339 --> 01:20:03,339
Dad!
1810
01:20:03,424 --> 01:20:04,466
There he is!
1811
01:20:04,550 --> 01:20:06,468
Hey, happy birthday, man!
1812
01:20:06,552 --> 01:20:08,595
Hey, look,
I think you left
something at home.
1813
01:20:10,431 --> 01:20:11,514
Arthur!
1814
01:20:11,599 --> 01:20:13,391
Yeah.
Thanks, Dad.
1815
01:20:20,024 --> 01:20:21,441
It's so beautiful.
1816
01:20:26,363 --> 01:20:27,363
My God.
1817
01:20:27,448 --> 01:20:28,490
Gosh.
1818
01:20:31,994 --> 01:20:33,328
I'm all right.
1819
01:20:33,412 --> 01:20:37,248
Gustavo!
Birthday cake! Birthday cake!
Try the birthday cake.
1820
01:20:37,875 --> 01:20:39,626
There's 36 different kinds!
1821
01:20:48,427 --> 01:20:49,427
Kevin?
1822
01:20:49,512 --> 01:20:50,512
Rosalind.
1823
01:20:51,764 --> 01:20:54,265
What a mitzvah that
you could make it
to the party.
1824
01:20:55,142 --> 01:20:56,267
What's wrong, honey?
1825
01:20:56,727 --> 01:20:57,894
I wish I knew.
1826
01:20:57,978 --> 01:20:59,395
Come. Sit down.
1827
01:21:01,982 --> 01:21:05,652
Look over this way
a little bit.
And a little up. Up.
1828
01:21:06,946 --> 01:21:08,279
Hey, Jack.
1829
01:21:09,990 --> 01:21:12,116
Wow, that's great.
That's a great likeness.
1830
01:21:13,661 --> 01:21:15,203
That's really...
1831
01:21:15,287 --> 01:21:18,122
It really captured
the intensity
and looks just like you.
1832
01:21:18,958 --> 01:21:20,208
All right.
So, look, last night,
1833
01:21:20,292 --> 01:21:22,377
I think we both said
some things we regret.
1834
01:21:22,461 --> 01:21:25,505
Maybe I shouldn't
have said anything
about Dr. Bob.
1835
01:21:25,965 --> 01:21:29,050
But then you did that
whole course-correction
thing. So...
1836
01:21:29,134 --> 01:21:32,512
Anyway,
"peace" of cake offering.
1837
01:21:39,478 --> 01:21:40,645
What the hell?
1838
01:21:43,774 --> 01:21:44,899
Shit.
1839
01:21:45,734 --> 01:21:47,485
Jack, you all right?
Jack, I'm sorry.
1840
01:21:47,987 --> 01:21:49,195
Jack, you okay?
1841
01:21:50,739 --> 01:21:54,659
Okay, Focker.
At least you're going to
make this a little fun.
1842
01:21:56,287 --> 01:21:58,788
Jack. Let's not do this.
Come on.
1843
01:21:59,331 --> 01:22:01,666
We've had this date
since the beginning, Greg.
1844
01:22:05,004 --> 01:22:07,338
All right. Let's dance.
1845
01:22:08,215 --> 01:22:09,465
Come on, man.
1846
01:22:29,778 --> 01:22:31,029
Jack?
1847
01:22:40,205 --> 01:22:41,789
Where are you? Jack!
1848
01:22:45,419 --> 01:22:46,544
Jack?
1849
01:22:53,093 --> 01:22:57,555
Get out of the ball pit!
Get out of the ball pit!
Get out!
1850
01:22:57,890 --> 01:22:59,015
Let's go.
1851
01:22:59,099 --> 01:23:01,059
Get out!
Get out of the ball pit!
1852
01:23:01,393 --> 01:23:02,602
Get out!
1853
01:23:05,189 --> 01:23:06,272
Jack?
1854
01:23:17,409 --> 01:23:19,827
I saw you last night
with Andi Garcia!
1855
01:23:20,871 --> 01:23:22,080
Nothing happened!
1856
01:23:24,375 --> 01:23:25,833
I've been in the wild
for so long,
1857
01:23:25,918 --> 01:23:27,377
that maybe
it's time to come home.
1858
01:23:27,461 --> 01:23:29,003
But then where is home?
1859
01:23:29,088 --> 01:23:31,714
Honey, home is
inside of you.
1860
01:23:31,799 --> 01:23:35,510
What you have been
seeking out there
is right in here.
1861
01:23:36,011 --> 01:23:37,720
In your heart?
No, in your heart.
1862
01:23:37,805 --> 01:23:38,846
In my heart.
1863
01:23:38,931 --> 01:23:40,014
Yes, yes, Kevin.
1864
01:23:57,449 --> 01:23:58,700
Suck it!
1865
01:24:01,620 --> 01:24:06,124
Arthur? Arthur?
Mom! Arthur's missing!
1866
01:24:22,391 --> 01:24:24,308
Jack! Nothing happened.
1867
01:24:25,811 --> 01:24:27,729
What'd you say?
Jack, nothing happened.
1868
01:24:27,813 --> 01:24:29,397
I'm telling you the truth.
1869
01:24:30,441 --> 01:24:31,733
Shit.
1870
01:24:34,778 --> 01:24:37,655
Jinxy! Jinxy!
Bad cat! Bad cat!
1871
01:24:38,449 --> 01:24:40,116
Jinx! Bad cat!
1872
01:24:41,034 --> 01:24:42,243
Jinx!
1873
01:24:43,829 --> 01:24:45,288
Jinx! Jinx!
1874
01:24:46,248 --> 01:24:47,498
Shit.
1875
01:24:48,250 --> 01:24:51,210
Kevin, you are
a lovely young man
1876
01:24:51,295 --> 01:24:55,089
with a number of unusual
fixations and hobbies.
1877
01:24:55,174 --> 01:24:56,174
Thank you.
1878
01:24:56,258 --> 01:24:57,383
I know you're
going to find your way.
1879
01:24:57,468 --> 01:25:00,094
Trust me, honey.
Because you have
the strength of a lion
1880
01:25:00,179 --> 01:25:02,096
and the soul of a poet.
1881
01:25:06,935 --> 01:25:08,102
BERNIE: Roz?
1882
01:25:09,480 --> 01:25:11,856
Bernie?
What are you doing here?
1883
01:25:13,192 --> 01:25:14,400
What are you doing here?
1884
01:25:14,485 --> 01:25:15,610
The guy has
issues, honey.
1885
01:25:15,694 --> 01:25:18,112
Bernard, I swear this isn't
what it looks like.
1886
01:25:18,197 --> 01:25:20,823
Your wife was comforting me
in a moment of distress
1887
01:25:20,908 --> 01:25:22,950
and my soul just
reached out to her.
1888
01:25:23,035 --> 01:25:24,285
Your soul or your tongue?
1889
01:25:24,369 --> 01:25:25,620
No. There was
no tongue involved.
1890
01:25:25,704 --> 01:25:26,913
There was a little.
1891
01:25:26,997 --> 01:25:28,289
Thank you for your honesty.
1892
01:25:28,373 --> 01:25:31,292
I thought you were
in Spain, honey.
What happened?
1893
01:25:31,376 --> 01:25:32,460
What happened?
1894
01:25:32,544 --> 01:25:35,254
I went halfway around
the world to master
the flamenco,
1895
01:25:35,339 --> 01:25:37,048
but there was
one thing missing,
1896
01:25:37,841 --> 01:25:39,258
my dance partner.
1897
01:25:39,802 --> 01:25:41,177
Bernie.
1898
01:25:41,553 --> 01:25:42,929
You're my true north.
1899
01:25:43,722 --> 01:25:46,140
I know as long
as we're together,
I'll never get lost.
1900
01:25:46,225 --> 01:25:48,518
What a beautiful line.
1901
01:25:49,019 --> 01:25:50,353
Come here, baby.
1902
01:25:51,230 --> 01:25:54,816
That's beautiful.
So raw, this electricity...
1903
01:25:54,900 --> 01:25:57,401
Will you get out of here
so I can shtup my wife?
1904
01:25:57,486 --> 01:25:58,528
Shtup her? Yeah, sure.
1905
01:25:59,613 --> 01:26:00,738
GREG: Jinx!
1906
01:26:00,823 --> 01:26:02,615
HENRY: Grandpa! Grandpa!
What's wrong?
1907
01:26:03,492 --> 01:26:04,534
Jack?
1908
01:26:04,618 --> 01:26:06,452
Jack. Jack.
1909
01:26:06,537 --> 01:26:07,578
Jack.
1910
01:26:08,247 --> 01:26:09,497
Honey. Greg, do something.
1911
01:26:09,581 --> 01:26:11,040
Okay. Having some
chest pain?
Yeah.
1912
01:26:11,124 --> 01:26:12,792
All right. Just relax.
I'm gonna check you out.
1913
01:26:12,876 --> 01:26:14,335
What's wrong with Grandpa?
1914
01:26:14,419 --> 01:26:15,837
PAM: He's gonna
be fine, honey.
1915
01:26:15,921 --> 01:26:18,840
Okay, I'm here. Okay.
1916
01:26:18,924 --> 01:26:21,008
Jack, you have your
nitro tabs with you?
1917
01:26:21,093 --> 01:26:22,927
Greg, he's not responding
to my treatment.
1918
01:26:23,011 --> 01:26:26,389
Really? To you waving
your hands over him?
He's not a Ouija board, Kevin.
1919
01:26:26,473 --> 01:26:27,598
Pam? Call 91 1.
1920
01:26:27,683 --> 01:26:28,724
Okay.
1921
01:26:28,809 --> 01:26:30,726
Kevin,
can you go up to the house,
see if you have some aspirin?
1922
01:26:30,811 --> 01:26:31,853
Aspirin.
1923
01:26:31,937 --> 01:26:33,020
It's all right.
1924
01:26:34,106 --> 01:26:35,273
Jinx!
1925
01:26:41,196 --> 01:26:42,697
Arthur!
Wow.
1926
01:26:43,574 --> 01:26:44,949
Thanks, Dad.
1927
01:26:47,870 --> 01:26:50,371
Just relax, Jack.
It's going to be okay.
1928
01:26:50,455 --> 01:26:51,914
Breathe, breathe.
1929
01:26:52,708 --> 01:26:54,041
I promise.
1930
01:26:55,878 --> 01:26:57,461
Is he taking
any other medications?
1931
01:27:00,173 --> 01:27:02,216
Just the 324
milligrams of aspirin
1932
01:27:02,301 --> 01:27:03,968
I gave him about
1 5 minutes ago.
1933
01:27:04,052 --> 01:27:06,512
Thank you, nurse.
You did good.
We'll take it from here.
1934
01:27:06,597 --> 01:27:08,097
By the way,
how'd you guys come by
1935
01:27:08,181 --> 01:27:09,682
all these bruises
and lacerations?
1936
01:27:09,766 --> 01:27:11,934
It's a long story.
1937
01:27:12,019 --> 01:27:14,854
We were in
the bouncy castle,
and then he tripped, and...
1938
01:27:14,938 --> 01:27:17,607
I get it.
My father-in-law tripped
1939
01:27:17,691 --> 01:27:20,359
through a plate glass window
at my wedding last year.
1940
01:27:21,153 --> 01:27:22,320
All right.
Let's get him loaded up.
1941
01:27:23,655 --> 01:27:25,323
Don't worry.
We'll take care
of your husband.
1942
01:27:25,407 --> 01:27:27,950
We're gonna follow
behind you in the car.
All right?
1943
01:27:28,577 --> 01:27:29,577
Greg.
1944
01:27:30,996 --> 01:27:34,040
I know you were
telling the truth
about Andi, Greg.
1945
01:27:34,124 --> 01:27:35,666
Really?
Yeah.
1946
01:27:36,501 --> 01:27:39,045
The pulse on your
carotid artery
remained steady
1947
01:27:39,129 --> 01:27:40,588
as you pleaded
your innocence.
1948
01:27:41,548 --> 01:27:42,924
Right, of course.
1949
01:27:43,967 --> 01:27:45,718
And, Greg.
Yeah.
1950
01:27:45,802 --> 01:27:49,639
It was never going to be
Dr. Bob. It was you.
1951
01:27:50,515 --> 01:27:51,557
It was always you.
1952
01:27:51,642 --> 01:27:54,018
You just relax and
stay quiet, Mr. Byrnes.
1953
01:27:54,102 --> 01:27:55,728
I'll see you
over there. Okay?
1954
01:27:55,812 --> 01:27:57,313
...Focker.
1955
01:27:57,773 --> 01:27:59,065
Why is he cursing at us?
1956
01:27:59,149 --> 01:28:00,775
Hey, we are trying
to help you, sir.
1957
01:28:00,859 --> 01:28:02,485
What? What?
1958
01:28:05,155 --> 01:28:07,031
You're the Greg Focker.
1959
01:28:07,449 --> 01:28:09,033
I'm sorry, what?
1960
01:28:09,618 --> 01:28:13,037
You're the...
You're the Greg Focker.
1961
01:28:16,416 --> 01:28:18,209
I'm the Greg Focker.
1962
01:28:24,257 --> 01:28:27,093
Okay. Okay.
1963
01:28:28,553 --> 01:28:29,595
Okay.
1964
01:28:29,680 --> 01:28:31,305
EMT: Let's get him up.
1965
01:28:57,249 --> 01:28:58,624
BERNIE: One more.
I need more. I need more.
1966
01:28:58,709 --> 01:28:59,750
One more, one more.
1967
01:28:59,835 --> 01:29:00,876
No, I need more.
1968
01:29:01,378 --> 01:29:02,586
Another present.
BERNIE: Here.
1969
01:29:02,754 --> 01:29:03,963
Best Chistmakkah ever.
1970
01:29:04,548 --> 01:29:05,840
This is a very
special gift, guys.
1971
01:29:05,924 --> 01:29:07,049
HENRY: One more, cool!
1972
01:29:07,676 --> 01:29:09,093
What is it,
Grandpa Bernie?
1973
01:29:09,177 --> 01:29:10,845
I've had it with me
my entire life.
1974
01:29:10,929 --> 01:29:13,014
It's my own original
whoopee cushion.
1975
01:29:13,098 --> 01:29:14,890
What does it do?
Are you kidding me?
1976
01:29:14,975 --> 01:29:16,434
Jack, lift up your leg.
1977
01:29:18,103 --> 01:29:19,437
Jack, come on.
1978
01:29:23,358 --> 01:29:24,859
ROZ: Disgusting!
1979
01:29:24,943 --> 01:29:26,193
It farts!
1980
01:29:26,862 --> 01:29:29,780
Jack, we have to
laugh at the stuff that
makes us human, right?
1981
01:29:29,865 --> 01:29:32,074
Gas, burps.
Picking noses?
1982
01:29:32,367 --> 01:29:34,660
You kids want to pick
your nose and flick
your boogers, do it.
1983
01:29:34,745 --> 01:29:35,786
Hey, Bernie.
1984
01:29:35,871 --> 01:29:37,329
But do it only
when it's dry.
1985
01:29:37,414 --> 01:29:38,789
Don't do a wet one.
I have something for Jack.
1986
01:29:38,874 --> 01:29:39,874
Take that to your room.
1987
01:29:39,958 --> 01:29:40,916
It's what makes life, life!
1988
01:29:41,001 --> 01:29:42,585
I know. I know.
Here, Jack,
1989
01:29:42,669 --> 01:29:45,671
this is a little something
from Bernie and me to you.
1990
01:29:45,756 --> 01:29:47,214
How thoughtful.
Thank you.
1991
01:29:47,299 --> 01:29:48,758
It is a very
thoughtful gift.
1992
01:29:48,842 --> 01:29:49,842
It was your idea.
1993
01:29:49,926 --> 01:29:51,052
I know.
1994
01:29:51,553 --> 01:29:52,970
What's this?
ROZ: What is that?
1995
01:29:53,055 --> 01:29:55,639
That is your own
personal yarmulke!
1996
01:29:56,099 --> 01:29:57,141
Jack.
1997
01:29:57,225 --> 01:29:58,684
One of those
little Jewish hats.
1998
01:29:59,478 --> 01:30:00,686
ROZ: Cute.
1999
01:30:00,771 --> 01:30:03,105
BERNIE: We know
that you're into that
genealogy stuff.
2000
01:30:03,190 --> 01:30:05,232
So, when I was
nursing you back to health,
2001
01:30:05,317 --> 01:30:07,568
I took the opportunity,
when you were taking a nap,
2002
01:30:07,652 --> 01:30:09,361
of snipping
a couple of your pubes
2003
01:30:09,446 --> 01:30:12,114
and I sent it to one of
those DNA testing sites.
2004
01:30:12,199 --> 01:30:13,240
You did what?
2005
01:30:13,325 --> 01:30:16,243
We thought it'd be fun
to trace your lineage
all the way back.
2006
01:30:16,328 --> 01:30:18,370
BERNIE: Yes.
And it turns out,
Jack T. Byrnes,
2007
01:30:18,455 --> 01:30:20,539
that you are
one twenty-third Israelite!
2008
01:30:21,124 --> 01:30:23,209
Welcome to the tribe, Jack!
2009
01:30:23,293 --> 01:30:25,753
While I dispute the findings,
I appreciate the gesture.
2010
01:30:25,837 --> 01:30:27,004
Thank you, Bernard, Roz.
2011
01:30:27,089 --> 01:30:28,214
You're welcome, Ya'akov.
2012
01:30:28,298 --> 01:30:29,799
Your Hebrew name.
Ya'akov.
2013
01:30:29,883 --> 01:30:31,300
BERNIE: Ya'akov.
Ya'akov.
2014
01:30:31,384 --> 01:30:32,510
BERNIE: Two A's.
2015
01:30:32,594 --> 01:30:34,470
Well, listen, Greg,
we're in your home
2016
01:30:35,388 --> 01:30:38,015
and you're in charge here,
so why don't you
lead us in a toast?
2017
01:30:38,100 --> 01:30:39,600
Right.
2018
01:30:39,684 --> 01:30:42,144
Honestly, Jack,
I have no desire
2019
01:30:42,229 --> 01:30:43,270
to try and sound like I am
2020
01:30:43,355 --> 01:30:45,856
in any way
in charge of anything
in this house.
2021
01:30:46,399 --> 01:30:49,068
But I do love our family
very, very much.
2022
01:30:49,152 --> 01:30:53,823
And I'm really happy
that we can all be here
together for the weekend.
2023
01:30:54,699 --> 01:30:57,785
Then we'll part ways
and you guys will
return to your homes
2024
01:30:57,869 --> 01:30:59,453
in your own
respective states.
Cheers.
2025
01:30:59,538 --> 01:31:00,788
Cheers.
Cheers.
2026
01:31:00,872 --> 01:31:03,958
Actually, sweetheart,
your dad and I
have a little...
2027
01:31:04,042 --> 01:31:06,252
Gaylord, we're moving
to Chicago.
2028
01:31:07,504 --> 01:31:09,463
No, we're serious.
We sold Focker Isle.
2029
01:31:09,548 --> 01:31:12,424
We just bought
the house two doors down.
Isn't that great?
2030
01:31:12,551 --> 01:31:14,593
No, that's not great.
No,
if they're moving here,
2031
01:31:14,678 --> 01:31:15,928
then we're moving here.
Good!
2032
01:31:16,012 --> 01:31:17,138
We'll live together,
one big happy family.
2033
01:31:17,222 --> 01:31:18,305
We should discuss this.
2034
01:31:18,390 --> 01:31:20,307
No. No. No. Jack,
2035
01:31:20,392 --> 01:31:22,309
nobody's moving because
nobody's moving. Right?
2036
01:31:22,394 --> 01:31:24,937
BERNIE: How else are the kids
gonna be Fockerized
if we don't live here?
2037
01:31:25,021 --> 01:31:27,231
No. Nobody's going
to be Fockerized.
2038
01:31:27,315 --> 01:31:28,774
No.
Why not?
2039
01:31:31,236 --> 01:31:34,405
This Google is
a wonderful tool,
Jinxy cat.
2040
01:31:35,907 --> 01:31:38,909
Don't tell anyone,
but I'm going to do
a search on myself.
2041
01:31:56,887 --> 01:31:58,012
{\pos(250,270)}Come on. Who needs
something like this?
2042
01:31:58,096 --> 01:32:01,223
{\pos(250,270)}Who's the target demo
for a drug like Sustengo?
2043
01:32:01,308 --> 01:32:04,185
{\pos(250,270)}And l got to say
it's somebody like
my father-in-law.
2044
01:32:04,269 --> 01:32:07,271
{\pos(250,270)}His name is Jack Byrnes.
You know,
he had a heart attack
2045
01:32:07,355 --> 01:32:10,900
{\pos(250,270)}and he called me up,
he said, "Greg, l've had
a heart attack."
2046
01:32:10,984 --> 01:32:12,193
{\pos(250,270)}Now, l said,
"First of all, Jack,
2047
01:32:12,277 --> 01:32:13,986
{\pos(250,270)}"don't you have
to have a heart to
get one of those?"
2048
01:32:15,280 --> 01:32:18,365
{\pos(250,270)}First weekend l ever met him,
he said to me, he said,
2049
01:32:18,450 --> 01:32:23,537
{\pos(250,270)}"Hey, listen,
keep your snake in its cage
for the next 72 hours."
2050
01:32:24,122 --> 01:32:25,206
{\pos(250,270)}I didn't say it like that.
2051
01:32:25,290 --> 01:32:27,166
{\pos(250,270)}All right.
Maybe somebody's
had their snake
2052
01:32:27,250 --> 01:32:29,835
{\pos(250,270)}in their cage for
about 30 years! Okay.
2053
01:32:33,256 --> 01:32:34,840
{\pos(250,270)}Remix. What's a remix?
2054
01:32:34,966 --> 01:32:36,967
{\pos(250,270)}You know, the guy is
definitely obsessed...
2055
01:32:37,093 --> 01:32:38,761
{\pos(250,270)}GREG:
Byrnes, Jack Byrnes
2056
01:32:38,845 --> 01:32:40,387
{\pos(250,270)}My father-in-law
My father-in-law
2057
01:32:40,472 --> 01:32:42,389
{\pos(250,270)}Byrnes, Jack Byrnes
2058
01:32:42,474 --> 01:32:44,308
{\pos(250,270)}Candidate for the drug
Obsessed with sex
2059
01:32:44,392 --> 01:32:46,101
{\pos(250,270)}Byrnes, Jack Byrnes
2060
01:32:46,186 --> 01:32:47,937
{\pos(250,270)}Not getting it up
2061
01:32:48,021 --> 01:32:49,772
{\pos(250,270)}Jack, Jack Byrnes
2062
01:32:49,856 --> 01:32:51,607
{\pos(250,270)}Talk about sexual frustration
2063
01:32:51,691 --> 01:32:52,775
{\pos(250,270)}Byrnes
2064
01:32:52,859 --> 01:32:55,027
{\pos(250,270)}Obsessed with boobs
He can breast
feed his grandson
2065
01:32:55,111 --> 01:32:56,070
{\pos(250,270)}Jack Byrnes
2066
01:32:56,154 --> 01:32:58,781
{\pos(250,270)}Mannary gland
Couple of tugs off
the thing himself
2067
01:32:58,865 --> 01:32:59,865
{\pos(250,270)}Hey, Focker
2068
01:32:59,950 --> 01:33:01,116
{\pos(250,270)}I never did that.
2069
01:33:01,201 --> 01:33:02,910
{\pos(250,270)}Hey, Focker, l got nipples
Okay
2070
01:33:02,994 --> 01:33:04,495
{\pos(250,270)}Hey, Focker, l got nipples
Wow
2071
01:33:04,579 --> 01:33:06,163
{\pos(250,270)}Can you milk me?
2072
01:33:06,248 --> 01:33:07,915
{\pos(250,270)}Circle of trust
goes round and round
2073
01:33:07,999 --> 01:33:09,750
{\pos(250,270)}Jack
Circle of trust
goes round and round
2074
01:33:09,834 --> 01:33:11,543
{\pos(250,270)}Byrnes
Circle of trust
goes round and round
2075
01:33:11,628 --> 01:33:12,962
{\pos(250,270)}Jack
2076
01:33:13,046 --> 01:33:15,256
{\pos(250,270)}Hello!
Hot little number
he's got named Jinxy
2077
01:33:15,340 --> 01:33:17,299
Now, he's talking about you.
2078
01:33:17,384 --> 01:33:18,884
{\pos(250,270)}Hot little number
he's got named Jinxy
2079
01:33:18,969 --> 01:33:21,136
{\pos(250,270)}Jinxy cat, Jinxy cat
l love you
2080
01:33:21,680 --> 01:33:23,680
The Godfocker.