1
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Fix & Resync: Xenzai[NEF]

2
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I love London.

3
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I love its rudeness, its lack of
community, its impatience.

4
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I even love its weather.

5
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But most of all I love the
anonymity.

6
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The first thing you should know
about me is that I'm a whore.

7
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In the world of children in bikinis
and grandmothers in fuck-me boots,

8
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the surest way to tell a prostitute

9
00:00:34,814 --> 00:00:36,775
is to look for the woman
in the designer suit.

10
00:00:37,535 --> 00:00:40,337
Locate the lifts.
Glide past reception.

11
00:00:41,097 --> 00:00:43,224
Look like
you know where you're going.

12
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Don't attract too much attention.
Be fabulous but forgettable.

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You should also know
that this isn't the real me.

14
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Morning.

15
00:01:42,530 --> 00:01:44,616
Escort. Hooker. Prostitute. Whore.

16
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I don't mind what you call me,
that's just semantics.

17
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There are as many different kinds of
working girls as there are people.

18
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But I can tell you about me.

19
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I should say up front
that I wasn't abused by a relative.

20
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I've got no children to support

21
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and I've never been addicted
to anything.

22
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Except for maybe the fourth season
of The West Wing, but you know...

23
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I'm very high class

24
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which means I charge by the hour

25
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and I charge a lot.

26
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So why do I do it?

27
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Well, I love sex and I love money.

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And I know you don't believe
I enjoy the sex, but I do.

29
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But I'm fundamentally lazy.

30
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What I really like
is being my own boss.

31
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Well, pretty much my own boss.

32
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Obviously, I have an agent,
she vets all my clients.

33
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Two lovely new gentlemen
for you today.

34
00:02:46,124 --> 00:02:49,566
OK. 'An out-call this evening
and an in-call this afternoon. '

35
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When?
Two o'clock.

36
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It's half one now.
Is it?

37
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Yes. You know I need
at least an hour's notice.

38
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Well, shit, shower and shave,
sweetheart. He's on his way over.

39
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I have certain rules.
Rule 1- keep life and job separate.

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Personal. Work.

41
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Private.

42
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Professional.

43
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Hannah. Belle.

44
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And never the twain shall meet.

45
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Thank you.

46
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Rule No. 2- stay in control.

47
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They sit down, I stand up.
Get the money first.

48
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Yeah, I'll call after.

49
00:03:56,562 --> 00:03:58,523
No problem. All right, bye.

50
00:03:59,964 --> 00:04:02,610
Rule 3- safety.
Always check in with the agency.

51
00:04:02,645 --> 00:04:06,287
So if I say "no problemo" instead of
"no problem" there's a problem.

52
00:04:09,929 --> 00:04:11,890
Everything you need's in here.

53
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Rule 4- hygiene. Mine and his.

54
00:04:23,576 --> 00:04:25,617
I always use men's deodorant.

55
00:04:25,652 --> 00:04:27,578
I never wear perfume.

56
00:04:28,218 --> 00:04:31,580
A professional never lets her client
leave smelling of woman.

57
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Convince them that you're wet
and you're halfway there.

58
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Goes without saying.

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And last but definitely not least,

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work out what the client wants
as fast as you can.

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And give it to him.

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Come with me.

63
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Tell me something
you fantasise about.

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00:05:10,962 --> 00:05:13,363
What do you mean?
Something that turns you on.

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This.
Where are we doing this?

66
00:05:20,807 --> 00:05:22,768
Where would you like to fuck me?

67
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Oh.

68
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Outside.

69
00:05:28,211 --> 00:05:30,212
Oh, in an alleyway.

70
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In a dirty alley.

71
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Er... OK.

72
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On a beach?

73
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Er...
In a field?

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On a farm?
Oh.

75
00:05:45,580 --> 00:05:47,541
The field's on the farm.

76
00:05:47,942 --> 00:05:50,583
I'm a country girl.
You're a farmer.

77
00:05:51,623 --> 00:05:53,584
Or a stable boy that seduced me.

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Can you see the stables?
Yeah, of course I can.

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Can you smell the horses?
I can smell the horses.

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00:06:02,669 --> 00:06:06,511
They're making noises in the stalls,
getting very excited.

81
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Horses have giant cocks, don't they?

82
00:06:08,627 --> 00:06:10,638
Oh, yes. Yes, they do.

83
00:06:10,674 --> 00:06:12,800
Maybe you should take me
to the stable.

84
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Don't fuck the horse!
I'm not even gonna get close.

85
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It's too big.

86
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What's it doing?
The horse?

87
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The stallion, it's out of control.

88
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It's far too big. It sounds like
it's going to break the stall door.

89
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They're powerful horses!

90
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Very... powerful... horse.

91
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I tell everyone
I'm a legal secretary

92
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for one of those huge
international law firms.

93
00:07:04,943 --> 00:07:08,224
You know, the ones that need staff
at night to meet contract deadlines.

94
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It's so boring no-one asks about it.

95
00:07:09,945 --> 00:07:12,867
I can't even tell my best friend Ben
what I do for a living.

96
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Best custard tart in London, that.

97
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See the crust? That's not a machine,
that's hand-made.

98
00:07:20,425 --> 00:07:22,597
I thought Vanessa had you on a diet.
She does.

99
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I'm living on fucking tofu
but I eat leftovers at the club.

100
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You've been fatter.
I never put you on a diet.

101
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In every other way
you're the worst girlfriend ever.

102
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What?
Don't mess about.

103
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You never!
Look at the size of your chops!

104
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That's really nice.
Give it. Yes, I do.

105
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Fancy a game of
"spoilt little rich girl"?

106
00:08:02,928 --> 00:08:05,054
We haven't done that in a while?
That one.

107
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I think this is lovely.
Shame the pool's so small, though.

108
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We're not making a decision based on
pool size, Benjamin!

109
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It's a bit shit, though.

110
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Let's go on in.

111
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Oh, lush! This is perfect!

112
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Beautiful fireplace.
Oh, yeah, great.

113
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Barrister or QC?
No way. Stock broker.

114
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It's owned by a retired barrister
who wants to move out of London.

115
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He still loves the property.

116
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Sash windows.
Ya, I love a sash.

117
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Love it. Why don't you try the
acoustics? She trained in Vienna.

118
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Plays incredible Chopin.
That's terribly rude, Benjamin.

119
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Plays like an angel.

120
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Thanks very much. Goodbye.

121
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Chopin, you cunt!

122
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How does anyone ever afford to buy a
house in London?

123
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It's just about making the money.

124
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Four Seasons - Spring

125
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It's a nice hotel.

126
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Not big enough for an Arab. Not
expensive enough for an American.

127
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Not trendy enough for a young
professional. He'll be over 50.

128
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Long-term married.

129
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First time with an escort so I'm
guessing he'll be newly retired

130
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which has led to a drop in self-esteem
and a need to feel powerful and special.

131
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This is why I'm good at my job.

132
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Belle?

133
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Daniel?
Hi.

134
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Right, we'll get a drink, shall we?

135
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Why don't you just try lying back?
Sorry.

136
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Oh, God. God.

137
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Look at that, the hour's all gone.
Don't worry.

138
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No, look, I can't afford -
Don't worry, we'll get there.

139
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You just need to relax.

140
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Er... why don't you watch me
have a play?

141
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That's extraordinarily nice of you,
it's just...

142
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I have to er...

143
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I'm going to have to go actually.

144
00:11:30,805 --> 00:11:32,811
What? You're not staying here?

145
00:11:32,846 --> 00:11:36,047
No, I can't. I'm not a huge fan
of hotels, really.

146
00:11:37,168 --> 00:11:39,529
But you stay if you want.
I've already paid online.

147
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On my own?

148
00:11:41,610 --> 00:11:43,571
Well, if you like.

149
00:11:44,211 --> 00:11:46,773
I'm just offering so as not to
waste... any of...

150
00:11:48,975 --> 00:11:51,496
Thank you, though.
Thanks for your time.

151
00:11:52,616 --> 00:11:54,657
And I'm sorry...

152
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Belle.

153
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Enchante.
I- I-I'm sorry.

154
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Is there anything in particular
I haven't -

155
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Oh, no, no. It's just...

156
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Good night.

157
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Well, that's a first.

158
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Thank you.

159
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Just put it there, thank you.

160
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No-one else?

161
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Oh, well, probably for the best.

162
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Can't have anyone getting too hefty.

163
00:12:50,075 --> 00:12:52,034
And last but not least, Rachel.

164
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I make it 2,300.
No, it's 2,000.

165
00:12:55,670 --> 00:12:59,148
Rachel, look at me,
with my books, my records.

166
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Now look at you. With your roots.

167
00:13:03,584 --> 00:13:05,543
It's 2,300, sweetheart.

168
00:13:06,181 --> 00:13:08,580
I owe you the 300.
Yes, you do.

169
00:13:11,098 --> 00:13:13,056
Now, ugly mugs.

170
00:13:13,536 --> 00:13:16,893
This gentleman has been all over
town with fraudulent money.

171
00:13:16,928 --> 00:13:19,828
Shiny notes. He tried it on
with one of Bruce's girls.

172
00:13:19,862 --> 00:13:22,728
She said he spoke with an accent.
Eastern European.

173
00:13:22,764 --> 00:13:24,532
You can't say that.
No, it's racist.

174
00:13:24,567 --> 00:13:26,824
You can't be racist
against Eastern Europeans.

175
00:13:26,859 --> 00:13:29,150
You can be prejudiced.
I'm prejudiced, then.

176
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Then we're all agreed.
They are my people.

177
00:13:31,448 --> 00:13:33,639
Funny you're Swedish on the site,
then.

178
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Enough.

179
00:13:35,079 --> 00:13:37,036
Right, that's your lot.

180
00:13:37,196 --> 00:13:39,240
Where's Fiona?

181
00:13:39,274 --> 00:13:42,032
Apparently her bloke saw her photo
on the Internet.

182
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Recognised the underwear he bought
her for Christmas.

183
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I should get my pictures more
pixilated.

184
00:13:47,063 --> 00:13:49,072
No-one is getting more pixilated.

185
00:13:49,106 --> 00:13:51,425
They can barely make out your gender
as it is.

186
00:13:51,460 --> 00:13:53,880
I couldn't bear it if my parents
found out.

187
00:13:53,915 --> 00:13:56,266
Ladies, I've got another lot here in
a minute.

188
00:13:56,300 --> 00:14:00,177
And keep things free. Holiday
season coming up and all that.

189
00:14:04,014 --> 00:14:07,572
My young one from the other night,
Daniel, did you hear from him?

190
00:14:07,607 --> 00:14:09,611
Yes. He rang to book again,
actually.

191
00:14:09,646 --> 00:14:11,654
But I gave him someone else.

192
00:14:11,688 --> 00:14:15,005
He was more specific this time.
What did he want, then?

193
00:14:15,041 --> 00:14:18,323
He asked for "girl next door".
He said jeans, no make-up.

194
00:14:19,521 --> 00:14:22,279
Takes all sorts, I suppose.
Who have you given him to?

195
00:14:22,314 --> 00:14:25,277
Rachel.
Rachel. £300-short Rachel?

196
00:14:25,717 --> 00:14:27,675
Are you playing me?

197
00:14:28,355 --> 00:14:30,398
Now stop asking favours.

198
00:14:30,432 --> 00:14:32,872
If you're not going to eat anything,
fuck off.

199
00:14:33,351 --> 00:14:37,667
Hello. Yes, Gabriella is free.
Six o'clock is fine. Thank you.

200
00:14:37,702 --> 00:14:39,710
You know, I would order something

201
00:14:39,746 --> 00:14:42,064
but I'd be worried
you'd take 40% of my food.

202
00:15:05,644 --> 00:15:08,123
Sorry, I know you were expecting
someone else.

203
00:15:08,158 --> 00:15:10,246
Oh, no, no.

204
00:15:10,281 --> 00:15:12,319
Rachel's not well. It's not good.

205
00:15:12,354 --> 00:15:14,278
Right. Well, hurray!

206
00:15:14,998 --> 00:15:17,001
Well, not hurray -
So you've got me

207
00:15:17,036 --> 00:15:19,193
without the miracle
of hair and make-up.

208
00:15:21,270 --> 00:15:23,230
No, I like it.

209
00:15:25,268 --> 00:15:27,787
Er... we can put you
in a nice hot shower if you -

210
00:15:27,822 --> 00:15:29,744
Oh, yeah, of course.

211
00:15:38,298 --> 00:15:40,255
Why do you wear shoes
in your own flat?

212
00:15:41,015 --> 00:15:43,058
Sorry?

213
00:15:43,094 --> 00:15:45,732
It's just... it looks like you're on
your way out.

214
00:15:47,490 --> 00:15:49,448
Are you a fan of feet, then?

215
00:15:52,166 --> 00:15:54,125
Not like that.

216
00:16:52,718 --> 00:16:54,675
Hello.

217
00:16:55,155 --> 00:16:57,159
No problem.

218
00:16:57,194 --> 00:16:59,232
I'll call you after. OK.

219
00:17:08,466 --> 00:17:11,822
My girlfriend and I were together
for four years.

220
00:17:12,820 --> 00:17:14,824
And it's difficult.

221
00:17:14,859 --> 00:17:17,178
I mean, I meet other girls.

222
00:17:18,097 --> 00:17:20,054
I like some of them.

223
00:17:21,014 --> 00:17:23,058
But after half an hour or so

224
00:17:23,092 --> 00:17:26,889
I just realise how little I
appreciated...

225
00:17:27,689 --> 00:17:30,167
When did you find out?
At a party.

226
00:17:31,287 --> 00:17:33,244
She was with her chap.

227
00:17:34,163 --> 00:17:36,881
She's nine months. She's like...
She's right out.

228
00:17:39,479 --> 00:17:42,277
She looked exactly like
I always imagined she would.

229
00:17:42,312 --> 00:17:45,075
My sister's nine months pregnant
and looks like a Volvo.

230
00:17:48,271 --> 00:17:50,314
You don't have to do the other one.

231
00:17:50,350 --> 00:17:53,388
No, I do. I have to do both.
I have a thing.

232
00:17:53,424 --> 00:17:55,346
I like symmetry.

233
00:17:56,146 --> 00:17:59,582
Square numbers and palindromes.
What's a palindrome again?

234
00:18:00,383 --> 00:18:03,220
A word that's spelt the same
backwards as forwards

235
00:18:03,255 --> 00:18:06,057
like noon, level -
Hannah.

236
00:18:06,092 --> 00:18:08,016
Hannah.

237
00:18:09,894 --> 00:18:11,852
You're Hannah?

238
00:18:13,251 --> 00:18:15,211
Yeah.

239
00:18:43,067 --> 00:18:46,504
'Hi, this is Ben. I can't take your
call now. Leave me a message. '

240
00:19:52,730 --> 00:19:55,408
.. and now I'm asking you
to give him someone else.

241
00:19:56,288 --> 00:19:58,285
I'm unpredictable like that.

242
00:19:59,086 --> 00:20:01,284
I don't know,
tell him whatever you want.

243
00:20:17,790 --> 00:20:19,827
You're not gonna believe
what I found.

244
00:20:21,108 --> 00:20:23,825
I was quite a spoilt little girl
when I was younger.

245
00:20:25,343 --> 00:20:27,343
And one of the many lessons I had...

246
00:20:30,260 --> 00:20:33,537
Now, what I want to know is who
wears this?

247
00:20:33,572 --> 00:20:35,535
You or me?

248
00:20:43,609 --> 00:20:47,286
'Sometimes it's not the youngest or
the richest clients you want,

249
00:20:47,322 --> 00:20:49,444
or the ones you have most in common
with.

250
00:20:50,164 --> 00:20:53,881
For me, the perfect partner is one
where I never have to be myself. '

251
00:20:59,556 --> 00:21:02,874
Sometimes I get paid to do the
things I've always wanted to do.

252
00:21:03,912 --> 00:21:06,669
The most prestigious adult party in
the country.

253
00:21:06,704 --> 00:21:09,524
Oh, shit.
Sorry. I know him from somewhere.

254
00:21:09,559 --> 00:21:12,310
I was this close
to having the best sex ever.

255
00:21:12,345 --> 00:21:14,744
I like your work, by the way.
I like your work, too.

256
00:21:15,942 --> 00:21:19,519
Is it just me, or are you a little
overdressed for work, dear?

257
00:21:19,555 --> 00:21:23,098
Maybe later on when you are really
desperate I will fuck you.

258
00:21:25,136 --> 00:21:31,054
Fix & Resync: Xenzai[NEF]

259
00:21:32,136 --> 00:21:37,054
ITFC Subtitles
STUART CAMPBELL