1
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[ GRUMBLING ]
OH!
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[ CHUCKLES ]
YEAH...
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AAH!
4
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[ INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER ]
AAH!
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[ GIGGLES ]
AAH!
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[ SIRENS WAILING ]
[ MACHINE-GUN FIRE ]
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THIS THE POLICE!
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AAH!
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AAH! WHOA!
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♪ OH, LIFE ON THE OUTSIDE
AIN'T WHAT IT USED TO BE ♪
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♪ YOU KNOW, THE WORLD'S GONE
CRAZY, AND IT AIN'T SAFE ON THE
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STREET ♪
♪ OH, WE'RE LOSING TRACK, AND I
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KNOW THERE'S ONLY ONE PLACE TO
GO ♪
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♪ I'M COMING HOME ♪
♪ WHOA, YEAH ♪
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♪ I'M COMING HOME ♪
Alice: [ GRUNTING ]
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Warden: [ SIGHS ]
SWEET, SWEET ALICE.
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THE FLAMES IN MY LOINS HAVE
RISEN TO TICKLE MY HEART.
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HOW DO I GET HER TO FEEL THE
SAME BURNING SENSATION THAT I
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DO?
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Jared: WELL, CALL ME
OLD-FASHIONED, SIR, BUT THERE'S
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ALWAYS THE OLD TRIED-AND-TRUE
OPTION OF ASKING A LADY OUT FOR
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A DRINK.
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Warden: YES, AN EXCELLENT
SUGGESTION!
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00:01:32,110 --> 00:01:34,510
Jared: OF COURSE, DATING
EMPLOYEES IS STRICTLY AGAINST
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SUPERJAIL REGULATIONS.
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Warden: THIS WOULD BE MORE
LIKE TWO CO-WORKERS SPENDING A
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LITTLE QUALITY TIME TOGETHER.
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WE'LL BUILD A BAR RIGHT HERE IN
SUPERJAIL.
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IT'LL BE THE PERFECT SPOT FOR
OUR RENDEZVOUS.
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Jared: SIR, I AM A RECOVERING
ALCOHOLIC.
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Warden: GREAT, THEN YOU CAN
BE THE BARTENDER.
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LET'S GET TO WORK.
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[ BUZZING ]
[ SCREAMING ]
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Alice: [ Deep voice ] MMM.
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[ TELEPHONE RINGS ]
HELLO?
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Warden: UH, YES, HELLO,
ALICE.
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THE WARDEN HERE.
I, UH...
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[ LAUGHS NERVOUSLY ]
I'M SURE YOU'VE HEARD ABOUT
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SUPERJAIL'S BRAND-NEW WATERING
HOLE, SUPERBAR.
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Alice: NO.
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00:02:15,343 --> 00:02:16,310
Warden: OH.
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UH, WELL, WE BUILT A BAR INSIDE
SUPERJAIL, AND...
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ALICE, HOW WOULD YOU FEEL ABOUT
ATTENDING THE GRAND OPENING WITH
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SUPERJAIL'S MOST ELIGIBLE
BACHELOR?
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00:02:26,377 --> 00:02:27,443
Alice: I'LL BE THERE.
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Jared: WHAT DID SHE SAY, SIR?
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Warden: SHE SAID YES!
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WHOO! WHOO-HOO!
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WHEE-HOO! WHOO-HOO-HOO!
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[ GLASS SHATTERING ]
Alice: SO MANY CHOICES.
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TEENY, MEENY, TINY, MOE.
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HEY, WHERE'S EVERYBODY GOING?
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WOULDN'T YOU LIKE TO KNOW.
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Warden: WELCOME TO SUPERBAR!
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[ ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ]
YEAH!
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Jared: 14 BEERS ON TAP,
INCLUDING 3 MICROBREWS.
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AND DON'T FORGET TO ORDER OUR
SPECIAL WARDEN WINGS, PRISONER
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POPPERS, OR SOLITARY CAESAR
SALAD.
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THE BUFFOON HAS OPENED A
SALOON.
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A SALOON FOR BABOONS.
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OOH OOH OOH, EEE EEE EEE.
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HEY!
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TIME TO PAR-TAY!
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UNH!
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I GOT TO HIT THE CAN.
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EH?
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LEFT HAND, LOINS.
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RIGHT FOOT, NUGGETS.
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[ GIGGLES ]
UGH!
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UNH!
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GUH-HUH!
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THE WARDEN SAYS, IF YOU SPRINKLE
WHEN YOU TINKLE, PLEASE BE NEAT
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AND WIPE THE SEAT.
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GUH-HUH!
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UNH!
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HA HO HO...
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[ CHOIR VOCALIZING ]
THE TIME IS UPON US!
78
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LOOK TO THE SKY FOR THE SHIP OF
THE APOCALYPSE!
79
00:04:03,610 --> 00:04:06,710
AND THAT'S WHEN I NOTICED THE
TUNNEL LEADS DIRECTLY TO THE SEA
80
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GATE.
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MAKING IT TO THE GATE IS NO
PROB.
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HOW WE GONNA GET TO THE SURFACE?
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WITH THIS.
84
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I AIN'T CLIMBING INSIDE NO
"ASS CRACK."
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WE STEAL THE PARTS FROM THE
BAR, ASSEMBLE IT IN THE
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BATHROOM, AND MULE OUR WAY
THROUGH THE WATER TO FREEDOM.
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WHO'S IN?
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[ BIRD CHIRPS ]
Warden: OKAY, EVERYBODY, I'LL
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00:04:29,710 --> 00:04:30,443
DO MY SONG.
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SHOULD I? SHOULD I?!
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ALL RIGHT, I WILL!
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HERE GOES!
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00:04:34,677 --> 00:04:38,443
♪ WELL, WHEN YOU'RE LIVING IN A
PRISON AND YOU'RE FEELING SO
94
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GOOD ♪
♪ IT'S JUST 22 FEET TO THE
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PARTY BAR ♪
♪ PARTY BAR IS TOTALLY COOL ♪
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HAVING FUN, EVERYBODY?
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00:04:49,343 --> 00:04:50,377
I HOPE SO.
98
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♪ DRINKING ALL NIGHT ♪
♪ WITH YOUR INMATE FRIENDS ♪
99
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♪ HEADING FOR THE PARTY BAR ♪
♪ HEADING FOR THE PARTY BAR ♪
100
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♪ IT'S A PARTY IN MY PARTY BAR ♪
I LOVE IT!
101
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[ GLASS SHATTERS ]
JARED!
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HEY, JARED.
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COME ON, HAVE A SIP OF ME.
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JARED!
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JARED!
106
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NO!
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[ GRUNTING ]
Alice: LOOKING GOOD.
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HEY, CHOLLO.
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NO CHANCE, STRINGBEAN.
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NICE ABS.
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PERFECT.
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IS THIS SEAT TAKEN?
Warden: ALICE.
113
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OH, WHAT IN THE WORLD ARE YOU
DOING HERE?
114
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ALICE, WHO'S THIS?
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00:05:36,977 --> 00:05:38,110
Alice: I BROUGHT A DATE.
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Warden: BUT I THOUGHT YOU
CAME HERE TO MEET ME.
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00:05:40,377 --> 00:05:41,911
Alice: COME ON, SWEET CHEEKS.
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MOMMY'S THIRSTY.
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[ GAGS ]
Warden: JARED, GET ME A
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DRINK, AND MAKE IT A DOUBLE!
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ANOTHER!
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[ CRYING ]
Alice: [ GULPING ]
123
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AHH.
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00:05:52,011 --> 00:05:54,243
[ GLASS SHATTERS ]
I GOT TO TAKE A LEAK.
125
00:05:54,310 --> 00:05:58,076
WHEN I GET BACK, WE'RE DOING
BODY SHOTS.
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AAH!
127
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[ GRUNTING ]
I'M FREE!
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IT'S ALICE!
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HOLD HER OFF AS LONG AS YOU
CAN.
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GAME OF POOL, ALICE? AAH!
131
00:06:12,911 --> 00:06:14,343
SHOOT SOME DARTS, ALICE? AAH!
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HOT WINGS, ALICE?
133
00:06:15,577 --> 00:06:18,343
AA-A-A-A-A-H!
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[ SIZZLING ]
Warden: SO, UH, DUDE, HOW'S
135
00:06:24,477 --> 00:06:26,176
YOUR DATE GOING, HUH?
136
00:06:26,243 --> 00:06:28,777
I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ALICE'S
DATE, YES?
137
00:06:28,844 --> 00:06:31,777
AND SHE WAS GONNA FALL IN LOVE
WITH ME.
138
00:06:31,844 --> 00:06:35,510
AND NOW IT'S YOU WHO'S GOT YOUR
DIRTY LITTLE HANDS ALL OVER MY
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00:06:35,577 --> 00:06:38,343
SWEET ALICE INSTEAD OF ME!
140
00:06:38,410 --> 00:06:40,143
Jared: SIR, MAYBE YOU'VE HAD
ENOUGH.
141
00:06:40,210 --> 00:06:42,477
Warden: [ STAMMERING ]
MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS,
142
00:06:42,543 --> 00:06:46,477
BARTENDER, AND JUST KEEP THE
[BLEEP] DRINKS COMING!
143
00:06:46,543 --> 00:06:49,810
GOODBYE, CRUEL WORLD!
144
00:06:49,877 --> 00:06:52,210
Jared: I CAN'T TAKE IT
ANYMORE!
145
00:06:52,277 --> 00:06:53,710
LOOK OUT! HERE COMES JARED!
146
00:06:53,777 --> 00:06:56,043
IT'S PARTY TIME!
147
00:06:56,110 --> 00:07:00,076
[ CHEERING ]
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, NO TIME
148
00:07:00,143 --> 00:07:01,043
FOR DRESS REHEARSALS.
149
00:07:01,110 --> 00:07:02,777
LET'S GO!
150
00:07:02,844 --> 00:07:05,277
Alice: KNOCK-KNOCK.
151
00:07:05,343 --> 00:07:06,677
PLAYING HARD-TO-GET?
152
00:07:06,744 --> 00:07:08,443
THAT'S MY KIND OF FOREPLAY.
153
00:07:08,510 --> 00:07:12,477
Warden: PUGILISM IS USUALLY
SOMETHING THAT'S BENEATH ME...
154
00:07:12,543 --> 00:07:16,011
BUT I MUST DEFEND THE HONOR OF
MILADY.
155
00:07:16,076 --> 00:07:17,877
Jared: "BUILD A BAR, CLEAN
UP THIS MESS!"
156
00:07:17,944 --> 00:07:19,243
THINKS HE'S SO GREAT!
157
00:07:19,310 --> 00:07:20,343
"I'M THE WARDEN!"
158
00:07:20,410 --> 00:07:21,944
I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT!
159
00:07:22,011 --> 00:07:23,110
I LOVE ALICE!
160
00:07:23,176 --> 00:07:25,610
BLAH, BLAH, BLAH!"
[ HICCUPS ]
161
00:07:25,677 --> 00:07:29,176
I'LL SHOW HIM WHO REALLY RUNS
THIS PLACE!
162
00:07:29,243 --> 00:07:35,011
[ EXPLOSIONS ]
HOLD ON TIGHT, BOYS!
163
00:07:35,076 --> 00:07:38,011
THIS IS IT!
164
00:07:38,076 --> 00:07:39,911
THE END IS NIGH!
165
00:07:43,810 --> 00:07:48,110
Warden: PREPARE YE FOR MY
FIRST VOLLEY.
166
00:07:48,176 --> 00:07:50,110
SURF IS UP.
167
00:07:50,176 --> 00:07:52,810
BEACH-BLANKET BLAMMO.
168
00:08:03,076 --> 00:08:10,011
[ GRUMBLING ]
[ SCREAMING ]
169
00:08:10,076 --> 00:08:12,176
AAH!
170
00:08:12,243 --> 00:08:13,844
UNH!
171
00:08:13,911 --> 00:08:17,011
UNH!
172
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AAH!
173
00:08:26,210 --> 00:08:28,844
AAH!
174
00:09:11,510 --> 00:09:13,343
[ METAL CREAKING ]
Jared: HUH?
175
00:09:32,076 --> 00:09:33,510
AAH!
176
00:09:33,577 --> 00:09:39,844
OH, GOD! WHAT HAVE I DONE?!
177
00:09:39,911 --> 00:09:42,510
Warden: [ COUGHS ]
ALICE...
178
00:09:42,577 --> 00:09:44,011
YOU SAVED ME.
179
00:09:44,076 --> 00:09:45,844
YOU HAVE FEELINGS FOR ME.
180
00:09:45,911 --> 00:09:46,911
Alice: KEEP DREAMING.
181
00:09:46,977 --> 00:09:53,143
DATING CO-WORKERS IS AGAINST
REGULATION.
182
00:09:53,210 --> 00:09:57,277
AND THEN HE KICKED MY MOM AND
LUKE OFF DADDY'S BOAT.
183
00:09:57,343 --> 00:09:58,610
WHAT DID HE LOOK LIKE?
184
00:09:58,677 --> 00:10:00,844
HE LOOKED LIKE --
LIKE THAT!
185
00:10:00,911 --> 00:10:02,443
AAH!