HELP ME! SOMEBODY, PLEASE, HELP!
HEY! OPEN THE DOOR, PLEASE!
SHE CAN'T BREATHE!
CAN'T YOU SEE THE SIGN, PAL?
OVER HERE!
HEY, UNLOCK THE DAMN DOOR! ASTHMA?
YEAH, HER INHALER'S NOT WORKING.
GET OUT OF MY WAY. CALL FOR AN AMBULANCE.
-WHAT DO I DO? -SET HER ON THE GROUND, BUT KEEP HER UPRIGHT.
-THIS INHALER'S GONNA RELAX HER MUSCLES... -OKAY.
...WHILE THE EPINEPHRINE OPENS THE AIRWAY.
OH, THERE YOU GO.
[ INHALES SHARPLY ]
OH, THANK GOD. THANK YOU.
YEAH.
SHE COULD'VE DIED. I MEAN, SHE WOULD'VE DIED.
WELL, SHE'S VERY LUCKY YOU WERE THERE.
NO, LUCK SHOULDN'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH IT.
YOU KNOW, THE CLINIC NEVER SHOULD'VE CLOSED,
AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT.
HEY, IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.
THERE'S NO WAY YOU COULD'VE SEEN THIS COMING.
NO, I WAS THE ONE THAT RECOMMENDED MR. FOWLER
TO OUR BOARD OF DIRECTORS.
YOU KNOW, HE TOLD ME THAT THE FUND
WOULD DOUBLE OUR CLINIC'S MONEY IN A YEAR.
-I BELIEVED HIM. -IT'S OKAY.
WE ALL DO STUPID THINGS SOMETIMES.
[ STAMMERS ]
UM [CLEARS THROAT] HOW DID YOU MEET, UH, DANIEL FOWLER?
I ONLY VOLUNTEER AT THE CLINIC ON WEEKENDS.
MY DAY JOB IS AT DALTON ACADEMY.
IT'S THAT PRIVATE SCHOOL UP NEAR BRIGHTON.
AND I'M THE ON-SITE NURSE THERE.
AND FOWLER'S STEPSON IS A STUDENT THERE.
HE'S A SWEET KID -- ALLERGIC TO STRAWBERRIES.
[ LAUGHS ]
THAT'S IRONIC.
-WHY? -BECAUSE HE'S SWEET.
YEAH, UH...
A LOT OF THE PARENTS HAD MONEY INVESTED WITH HIM,
AND I FIGURED, YOU KNOW,
IF THEY COULD TRUST HIM, THEN WE COULD, TOO.
OKAY, WELL, HERE'S THE THING.
THE GOVERNMENT HAS FROZEN FOWLER'S ASSETS.
SO YOU'LL GET THE MONEY BACK EVENTUALLY.
NO, THE CLINIC IS OUT OF TIME.
THE BOARD HAS PUT THE PROPERTY UP FOR SALE NEXT WEEK.
THAT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN. I PROMISE.
SORRY, UM...
IT'S JUST REALLY HARD TO TRUST PEOPLE RIGHT NOW, YOU KNOW?
MM.
THAT'S OKAY. WE DON'T TRUST YOU EITHER, SO...
NO, SHE DIDN'T...
THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME.
THAT WENT SUPER.
[ SIGHS ] GOD...
WHERE IS SOPHIE?
THE RICH AND POWERFUL, THEY TAKE WHAT THEY WANT.
WE STEAL IT BACK FOR YOU.
AND SOMETIMES, BAD GUYS MAKE THE BEST GOOD GUYS.
WE PROVIDE...
LEVERAGE.
THANKS FOR MEETING ME THIS MORNING.
SWEETHEART, LISTEN, I KNOW YOU'RE CRAZY BUSY.
IT'S FINAL-EXAM TIME AND EVERYTHING,
BUT I WAS THINKING THIS WEEKEND
WE SHOULD DEFINITELY, DEFINITELY
CHECK OUT THE VENETIAN EXHIBIT --
I DON'T THINK SO.
I DON'T THINK THAT THIS IS WORKING OUT.
[ CHUCKLES ] BABE...
LISTEN, I KNOW THAT...
YOU KNOW, I TRAVEL A LOT WITH...
MY JOB.
IT'S NOT THAT. UM, LISTEN...
WE TALK ALL THE TIME,
BUT IT NEVER FEELS LIKE YOU'RE ACTUALLY SHARING ANYTHING.
AS GREAT AS YOU ARE, THERE'S ALWAYS A MASK.
I JUST DON'T KNOW WHO YOU REALLY ARE, CATHERINE.
I GOT A CLASS.
SOPHIE.
PARDON?
[ SCOFFS ]
OR ALICE...
KAREN, MICHELLE...
ELIZABETH...
[ DOOR CLOSES ] HEY.
THIS LOOKS LIKE AN ORDINARY CELLPHONE, RIGHT?
[ BEEP ]
[ HIGH-PITCHED WHINING ]
IT'S NOT, MAN. IT'S A METAL DETECTOR.
SEE, IT USES PULSE-INDUCTION TECHNOLOGY
THAT SENDS OUT A CURRENT THAT GENERATES A MAGNETIC FIELD
AND THEN -- ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING?
YEAH.
WELL, WHAT DID I SAY?
YOU WERE EXPLAINING HOW YOU'RE STILL A VIRGIN.
IT'S A DIFFERENT KIND OF SKILL.
TALKING TO CLIENTS, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO SYMPATHIZE.
I TOLD YOU NOT TO TAKE HER.
WELL, YOU WERE RIGHT. WHERE'S SOPHIE?
-I DON'T KNOW. -WELL, WE'RE NOT WAITING.
LET'S GO. LET'S START. [ SIGHS ]
DANIEL FOWLER, 61, C.E.O. OF FTP FIDELITY.
NOW, THIS IS THE LARGEST PRIVATE-INVESTMENT FIRM
IN THE STATE, UP UNTIL ABOUT THREE WEEKS AGO.
THIS WHOLE THING WAS BLOWN AS A BIG PONZI SCHEME,
AND I'M NOT TALKING CROOKED INVESTMENTS.
I MEAN STONE-COLD CON.
THERE WAS NEVER ANY FUND, NO TRADES, NO REAL ACCOUNTS.
THE CLINIC LOST EVERYTHING.
10 YEARS, THIS GUY WORE ALL THE RIGHT SUITS
AND FILED ALL THE RIGHT PAPERS WITH THE S.E.C.
NOBODY LOOKED TWICE.
WELL, AS SOON AS THE FBI FIGURED IT OUT,
THEY SLAPPED A LITTLE HOUSE ARREST ON HIM,
AND THEY FROZE ALL OF HIS ASSETS --
I'M TALKING CORPORATE ACCOUNTS, PERSONAL ACCOUNTS,
REAL-ESTATE HOLDINGS.
ANYTHING ON PLANET EARTH WITH THIS DUDE'S NAME ON IT
IS ON ICE.
THE FBI's VERY THOROUGH, HUH?
EXTREMELY.
-SO WHAT'D THEY MISS? -OH.
$20 MILLION.
THEY MOVED IT OFF THE BOOKS
RIGHT BEFORE THE WARRANTS CAME DOWN.
YEAH, WELL, HE KNEW THE END WAS NEAR,
AND HE WAS GETTING READY TO BOLT.
TELL ME SOMETHING -- WHERE WAS FOWLER ARRESTED?
OH, IN HIS APARTMENT, PACKING FOR HIS
"BUSINESS TRIP" TO THE MALDIVES.
YOU SEE, HE'D NEED IT LIGHT, PORTABLE, CLOSE AT HAND.
THAT $20 MILLION IS IN HIS APARTMENT.
YEAH, BUT THIS GUY'S ON HOUSE ARREST, MAN.
I MEAN, HE'S PRACTICALLY LIVING WITH THE FBI.
THE PROBLEM IS NOT GETTING INTO THE APARTMENT
BUT GETTING THEM OUT.
WHERE WERE YOU?
OH, I-I WAS RUNNING AN ERRAND.
WEREN'T YOU WITH THE BOYFRIEND?
[ TIN SLAMS ]
SO, UM, WHAT ARE THE TERMS OF HIS HOUSE ARREST?
FOWLER'S CONFINED TO HIS $6 MILLION PENTHOUSE
OVERLOOKING THE CHARLES RIVER.
YEAH, THAT'S A ROUGH PUNISHMENT, HUH?
THE WHOLE PLACE IS OUTFITTED WITH 24/7 SURVEILLANCE
SO THE FEDS CAN KEEP AN EYE ON HIM.
NOW...
WE CAN, TOO.
I PIGGYBACKED ON THEIR WIRELESS FEED.
STILL, FOR US TO GET IN AND SEARCH THE PLACE,
WE'VE GOT TO GET RID OF FOWLER.
NOW, THERE ARE THREE GENERAL EXCEPTIONS FOR HOUSE ARREST.
THERE'S PERSONAL SAFETY, DEATH OF A RELATIVE,
AND FAMILY EVENTS.
PERSONAL SAFETY -- WE COULD BURN THE APARTMENT DOWN.
-OOH! OOH! -OR...
DEATH OF A RELATIVE.
-UH, W-WHO'S THAT? - I LOOKED EVERYWHERE, MOM.
-OH. - WELL, CAN'T YOU FIND...
-OH, THE KID. - MY CELLPHONE. I THINK MAYBE...
KID'S FROM HER FIRST MARRIAGE -- WIDMARK.
- LOST IT. -OH, I'M SORRY.
WIDMARK?
RICH PEOPLE, MAN.
GEEZ...
OH, CAN YOU, UH, PUNCH IN ON THAT, PLEASE?
DO YOU HAVE ANY RESPECT FOR YOUR PERSONAL PROPERTY?
DO YOU HAVE ANY RESPECT FOR ME? I BOUGHT YOU THAT CELLPHONE.
DAN, HE SAID HE WAS SORRY.
YEAH, HE'S SORRY, ALL RIGHT.
I'D GROUND YOU, BUT YOU DON'T HAVE ANY FRIENDS
TO GO OUT WITH ANYWAY.
I'M GONNA TALK TO HIM. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
WOW. OKAY.
WHAT DO WE GOT ON THE KID?
WIDMARK FOWLER, AGE 10.
NO ARRESTS, NO OUTSTANDING WARRANTS.
HARDISON...
HE'S A 5th-GRADE STUDENT AT DALTON ACADEMY,
ACADEMICALLY UNEXCEPTIONAL, NO EXTRACURRICULARS.
HE'S ALLERGIC TO STRAWBERRIES.
[ LAUGHS ] STRAWBERRIES...
[ LAUGHS ]
JUDGES GIVE OUT DAY PASSES FOR FAMILY EVENTS.
IT'S ONE OF THE THREE THINGS, RIGHT?
SO FOWLER IS GOING TO ASK FOR ONE
SO HE DOESN'T MISS HIS KID'S BIG DEBUT.
OKAY, I'LL BITE.
WHAT'S HE DEBUTING AS?
YEAH, I DON'T KNOW.
BUT WE'RE GONNA GO STEAL HIS SCHOOL AND FIND OUT.
[ BELL RINGS ] A MISTER ANANDO BUHARI IS HERE.
I DON'T HAVE ANY APPOINTMENTS.
I KNOW. DO YOU WANT --
OH, DR. JERROD.
DR. JERROD, COME.
MMM. [ CHUCKLES ]
IT'S, UH, IT'S A PLEASURE.
I AM ANANDO BUHARI, BOTSWANA SPECIAL ENVOY.
I WORK FOR PRESIDENT KHAMA.
HE IS MOST IMPRESSED WHEN HE READ YOUR PAPER
YOU WROTE AS A STUDENT.
HOW DO YOU SAY, YOUR, UM...
THE PRESIDENT OF BOTSWANA READ MY GRAD-SCHOOL THESIS?
YES, ALL 600 GLORIOUS PAGES,
FROM WHICH INSIGHT DRIPS LIKE HONEY
UPON WHICH BEES OF WISDOM FEAST.
[ CHUCKLES ]
THE PRESIDENT IS REBUILDING THE EDUCATIONAL SYSTEM
FROM THE GROUND UP.
WOULD YOU CONSIDER GOING TO BOTSWANA TO MEET HIM?
ALL EXPENSES PAID, OF COURSE.
I...
YES.
EVERYONE, SETTLE DOWN!
I ASSURE YOU EVERYTHING IS UNDER CONTROL!
MR. JERROD JUST TOOK A LEAVE OF ABSENCE.
IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SCHOOL YEAR?!
THE SCHOOL BOARD HAS ALREADY SENT OVER AN INTERIM HEADMASTER.
WOULD YOU BE QUIET?! [ BREATHING HEAVILY ]
AND AFTER READING HIS FILE,
I CAN ASSURE YOU WE ARE IN EXCELLENT HANDS!
DR. MELCHER?
[ INDISTINCT YELLING ]
[ German accent ] GUTEN TAG.
MY NAME IS DR. MELCHER.
AND I PRESUME THAT YOU ARE ALL FAMILIAR
WITH THE PRE-EMINENT LITERATURE ON THE CHILDREN'S EDUCATION --
MY BOOK, "THE MELCHER METHOD."
JA?
IN WHICH CASE ANY FURTHER, UH, INTRODUCTION WOULD BE REDUNDANT.
I'D LIKE TO BEGIN BY SPEAKING ABOUT THE CHANGES
WE'RE GOING TO BE MAKING IN THE CURRICULUM.
EXCUSE ME.
-SHH! SHH! SHH! - JA, JA?
MARK SANFORD.
I'M HEAD OF THE CONCERNED PARENTS ASSOCIATION.
THAT MUST BE VERY EXCITING FOR YOU.
YES, I'M SURE.
UH, WHY DO WE NEED ANY CHANGES AT ALL?
I MEAN, THIS IS THE BEST PRIVATE SCHOOL IN BOSTON.
[ INDISTINCT YELLING ]
- JA, JA. WELL, SEE... -LET HIM TALK!
THE MELCHER METHOD INVOLVES THE EDUCATION OF THE WHOLE CHILD --
MIND AND BODY.
JA, WHEN A CHILD FAILS, IS IT JUST THE BRAIN THAT FAILS?
NEIN.
NO, THE BODY CONTAINS THE FAILING BRAIN,
AND BOTH ARE CAST INTO A CRUEL WORLD OF DARKNESS AND DESPAIR,
AND EVEN WORSE --
PUBLIC SCHOOL.
-OH, RIGHT. -PUBLIC SCHOOL?
DANTE'S INFERNO OF MEDIOCRITY.
[ SMACKS LIPS ]
WHICH IS WHY I BRING WITH ME TWO OF MY MOST VALUED ASSOCIATES.
UH, WE HAVE MIND, UH, AND BODY.
JA. JA.
MISS DONOVAN WILL HONE YOUR CHILDREN'S MINDS,
AND MR. BREWER, HE WILL CRAFT YOUR CHILDREN'S BODIES
INTO THE PROPER MIND-VESSELS THROUGH EXERCISE AND NUTRITION.
AND ANY QUESTIONS?
[ INDISTINCT YELLING ]
[ SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE ]
OPEN FLOOR PLAN. 3,200 SQUARE FEET.
UH, PANORAMIC VIEWS OF THE PARK AND THE CHARLES.
UH, THERE'S A FITNESS CENTER, A ROOFTOP POOL,
UH, CONCIERGE SERVICE.
IT'S THE PERFECT NEWLYWED APARTMENT.
OH, IT'S -- THE PLACE, IT'S FANTASTICAL.
WHAT DO YOU THINK, BINKY?
IT'S A LITTLE SMALL.
THE -- THE APARTMENT, BINKY.
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE APARTMENT?
WE'LL TAKE IT.
SHE -- SHE LOVES AIR.
[ Normal voice ] HARDISON AND PARKER ARE ALL SET.
NOW ALL WE GOT TO DO IS GIVE WIDMARK A TRIUMPH
WORTHY OF A DAY PASS.
A TRIUMPH? IN WHAT?
I MEAN, IN FIVE YEARS, THIS KID HASN'T JOINED A CLUB,
HE HASN'T PLAYED A SPORT.
I'VE GOT TO BE HONEST WITH YOU.
I DON'T KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT USING A KID TO GET TO A MARK.
WE'RE NOT USING HIM.
I MEAN, EVERY KID IS GOOD AT SOMETHING, YOU KNOW?
WE JUST GOT TO DRAW WIDMARK OUT, GIVE HIM HIS MOMENT TO SHINE.
SO, WE'D BE LIKE HIS FAIRY GODPARENTS.
EXACTLY, AND, I MEAN, COME ON, LOOK AT THIS --
CUSHY PRIVATE SCHOOL.
NO GUNRUNNERS, MOB BOSSES, INTERPOL.
THIS -- THIS IS A BREEZE.
WE'VE GOT ONE WEEK BEFORE THE CLINIC CLOSES FOR GOOD.
ATHLETICS, ACADEMICS.
LET'S GO GET, UH, WIDMARK THE WIN, ALL RIGHT?
ALL RIGHT, WIDMARK.
GET ON THE LINE. YOU'RE UP.
YEAH, YOU'RE UP. GET ON THE LINE.
SHOW THEM WHAT YOU GOT, MAN.
YOU GOT THIS.
HEY, YOU, TAKE YOUR HELMET OFF.
-WHAT'S YOUR NAME? -SKYLER SANFORD.
-SKY -- SKYLER? -YEAH.
IS THAT A BOY'S NAME?
DON'T DO THAT AGAIN.
PUT YOUR HAT ON. YOU'RE UP AGAINST WID--
I SAID GET OUT THERE, MAN. GET OUT HERE.
ALL RIGHT.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING, MAN? [ LAUGHTER ]
WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT ARE Y-- DON'T LAUGH!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
THERE'S GIRLS HERE. YOU'RE BETTER THAN THAT.
TURN YOUR HAT AROUND.
ALL RIGHT.
HERE WE GO.
EN GARDE. FENCE!
[ BUZZING ]
NEXT WEEK IS THE STATE SPELLING BEE,
AND WE'RE GOING TO BE SENDING A REPRESENTATIVE
FROM RIGHT HERE IN DALTON.
NOW, I'VE CHOSEN THE BEST SPELLERS FROM EVERY CLASS
TO COMPETE IN THE TRYOUTS.
THE WINNERS WILL COMPETE IN A SCHOOL-WIDE COMPETITION
NEXT FRIDAY.
YOUR PARENTS ARE GONNA BE THERE --
IT IS GONNA BE HUGE. LET'S GET STARTED!
[ BELL DINGS ] WIDMARK -- FOOD.
FOOD. F-O-O-D.
FOOD.
PSEUDOSYLLOGISM.
[ SCOFFS ] THAT'S NOT FAIR. HE GOT "FOOD"!
UH-UH-UH.
SKYLER, I CAN ASSURE YOU THAT THE ORDER OF THESE CARDS
IS ENTIRELY RANDOM.
PSEUDOSYLLOGISM.
UM, PSEUDOSYLLOGISM. S--
[ BELL DINGS ]
[ SCOFFS ] WHATEVER.
CHYLOCAULOUS.
C-H-Y-L-O-C-A-U-L-O-U-S.
CHYLOCAULOUS.
THAT'S IMPRESSIVE.
SUNSET.
S-U...
RIBONUCLEIC.
R-I-B-O-N-U-C-L-E-I-C.
WILDFIRE. W-I-L-D...
FLIBBERTIGIBBET.
F-L-I-B-B-E-R-T-I-G-I-B-B-E-T.
-BICYCLE. -B-I...
S-I-C-L-E?
BICYCLE. [ BELL DINGS ]
ANTIDISESTABLISHMENTARIANISM.
A-N-T-I-D-I-S-E-S-T-A-B-L-I-S-H- M-E-N-T-A-R-I-A-N-I-S-M.
ANTIDISESTABLISHMENTARIANISM.
CONGRATULATIONS, MS. KIM.
[ BELL RINGS ] CLASS DISMISSED.
HEY, WIDMARK. GOOD JOB.
I JUST GOT LUCKY WITH THE WORDS YOU GAVE ME.
MNH-MNH. BE PROUD OF YOURSELF.
THE IMPORTANT THING IS YOU TRIED.
I TRY HARD ALL THE TIME,
BUT NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WANT SOMETHING, IT NEVER HAPPENS.
OH, SWEETIE, WHAT -- WHAT DO YOU WANT?
I DON'T KNOW.
I JUST...
I WANT SOMEONE TO LIKE ME.
DOES THAT GET EASIER WHEN YOU'RE A GROWN-UP?
UM, NO.
I DON'T THINK IT DOES.
YOU'RE NICE.
BUT WEIRD.
[ SCOFFS ] ALL RIGHT, GO ON. YOU'RE LATE FOR CLASS.
[ GRUNTING, GASPING ]
STOP MOVING!
LOOK, IT DON'T HAVE TO BE EXACT.
WOMAN, IT'S A MOTION DETECTOR. JUST POINT IT THAT WAY.
[ ELEVATOR BELL DINGS ]
[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]
WHAT THE HELL DO YOU GUYS WANT?
WELL, WE'RE HAVING A PROBLEM
WITH THE SIGNAL FROM CAMERA TWO AGAIN.
AGH!
HEY! FBI! DROP THE GUN!
[ BREATHING HEAVILY ]
SPECIAL AGENT HAGEN?
IT'S ME -- McSWEETEN.
TODD, FROM THE MOSCONE MOB CASE LAST YEAR?
OH. [ LAUGHS ] YEAH!
-I LOST HIM. -YOU DROPPED THIS.
YEAH. I-I DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE. YES, I DROPPED IT.
AGENT THOMAS, GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN.
RIGHT BACK AT YOU. UM...
TAGGERT FROM THE MOSCONE CASE.
R-RIGHT.
RIGHT, RIGHT.
SO, UH, WHAT Y'ALL BEEN UP TO?
WELL, ACTUALLY, WE'VE HAD A PRETTY GOOD RUN OF IT LATELY.
[ CHUCKLES ] CLOSED SOME BIG CASES.
-BIG. -MOSCONE, FOR ONE.
MOSCONE, NO MORE-NE. [ CHUCKLES ]
WE ALSO SHUT DOWN A HUGE METH RING IN CALIFORNIA
DURING A BANK ROBBERY.
WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING HERE?
[ SMACKS LIPS ]
I MEAN, WE -- WE'RE UNDERCOVER, MAN.
YEAH, YEAH -- MORE MANPOWER ON THE FOWLER CASE.
OH, WELL, WE NEVER --
THEY NEVER SAID ANYTHING ABOUT --
-WE'RE YOUR SECRET BACKUP. -YEAH.
-WELL... -HEY!
-...THAT'S GREAT! -THAT'S GOOD.
SHH! SECRET!
SO, ME AND YOU -- YOU, I -- US --
-WE SHOULD RESUME SURVEILLANCE. -[ WHISTLES ]
FELLAS.
CAN YOU IMAGINE HAVING HER FOR A PARTNER?
WHAT?
YOU WANT TO SEE OTHER PARTNERS?
I DIDN'T SAY THAT.
[ SIGHS ] YEAH, FINE. WHATEVER.
-THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT! -YEAH.
LET ME JUST G-G-GET THIS STRAIGHT, OKAY?
ALL RIGHT, YOU TWO --
YOU COULDN'T RIG A GYM CLASS OR A SPELLING BEE?
AND YOU TWO -- YOU RUN INTO THE ONLY FBI AGENTS ON THE PLANET
THAT RECOGNIZE YOU?
I GOT TO BE HONEST WITH YOU.
-I THINK WE BROKE THE KID EVEN MORE. -MM.
WE ARE THE WORST FAIRY GODPARENTS IN THE WORLD.
[ Sighing ] LISTEN, WE STILL GOT TO GET FOWLER
OUT OF THE APARTMENT SO WE CAN GET IN.
YEAH, EXCEPT NOW WHEN HE LEAVES,
THERE WILL BE SOMEBODY WAITING TO KILL HIM.
ONE OF HIS VICTIMS WANTS PAYBACK
MORE THAN HE WANTS TO BE PAID...
BACK.
ONE OF YOU TWO CAN IDENTIFY THE GUNMAN, RIGHT?
OH, YEAH, SURE.
HE STOPPED AND LET ME TAKE A PICTURE OF HIM AS I WAS CHASING HIM.
HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT, MAN? I'VE BEEN AROUND LITTLE KIDS ALL DAY.
I DON'T NEED TO COME HOME AND DO ALL THIS CRAP.
HEY, MAN, WITH ALL THAT?
I'VE BEEN IN THIS PINK SHIRT AND THESE TIGHT PLAID PANTS,
THESE OLD WEBSTER LOAFERS, THIS GIRL WALKING ON MY BACK.
I DON'T NEED THIS, MAN.
-IS THIS THE GUY? -MM-HMM.
SEE?
WOW, I-I DIDN'T KNOW YOU COULD DO THAT.
I THOUGHT EVERYBODY COULD DO THAT.
OKAY. ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
WE'LL KEEP AN EYE ON HIM.
IN THE MEANTIME, IF THEY THINK YOU'RE REAL FBI, BE REAL FBI.
I MEAN, USE IT TO CASE THE APARTMENT.
ALL RIGHT, SO I'M OUT OF THIS,
AND I'M ON FBI DETAIL WITH PARKER AND HARDISON THEN.
ACTUALLY, NO, I NEED YOU TO BE COACH BREWER, SO...
THERE'S AN ARMED GUNMAN OUT THERE.
YOU WANT ME IN THE GYM WITH KIDS NAMED SKYLER AND INDIGO?
WHERE DID COACH BREWER GO? I MEAN, WE OUGHT TO BE...
SHH! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!
...THERE AS THE -- -[ GASPS ] OOH!
* ...TROUBLE I'VE SEEN
"THE PLAY IS THE THING
WHEREIN I'LL CATCH THE CONSCIENCE OF A KING."
* ...TIMES I'M UP
* SOMETIMES I'M DOWN
[ GASPS ] OH.
* OHH, LORD
* SOMETIMES I'M ALMOST TO THE GROUND *
SOPHIE, HOW LONG WOULD IT TAKE YOU TO STAGE A MUSICAL?
SIX WEEKS.
YOU HAVE TWO DAYS.
* NOBODY KNOWS THE TROUBLE I'VE SEEN *
* THERE CAN BE NO CONFUSION
* THAT FUSION POWERS THE STAR
D-DID...
DID YOU JUST MAKE THAT UP ON THE SPOT?
-YES, MA'AM. -HUH.
YOU REALLY ARE QUITE RELENTLESS.
THANK YOU, MA'AM.
M-MISS DONOVAN?
W-WHY ARE WE SINGING AT A SCIENCE FAIR?
AH. GOOD POINT, YES.
SCIENCE. KNOWLEDGE.
WHAT IS KNOWLEDGE WITHOUT EMOTIONAL CONTEXT?
-FACTS. -UNH-UNH. EMPTY. MEANINGLESS.
WE'RE TAKING LEFT BRAIN -- SCIENCE --
AND COMBINING IT WITH RIGHT BRAIN -- CREATIVITY --
TO ENGAGE THE AUDIENCE'S ENTIRE BRAIN.
NOW, JUST -- JUST PRESENT YOUR PROJECTS,
AND WE'LL JUST SET IT TO A LITTLE MELODY.
[ CLAPS ] WHO'S NEXT?
* I CAN MAKE A BATTERY OUT OF A POTATO *
* THANK YOU
BUT I CAN TURN ON A LIGHT BULB.
MNH-MNH. THAT WON'T BE NECESSARY.
MR. FOWLER?
* YOU MIGHT FIND THIS DISTASTEFUL *
* OR CALL IT JUST PLAIN GROSS
* TO SING IN PRAISE OF BREAD MOLD *
* OR WONDER HOW IT GROWS
* IT EVEN MAKES YOU CRAZY THAT MOLD DEVOURS YOUR FOOD *
I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY, WIDMARK.
-I-I'M SORRY. -NO, NO, NO.
THAT WAS -- THAT WAS -- YES, THAT WAS, UH, IMPRESSIVE.
IT WAS -- IT WAS UNDERSTATED.
IT WAS -- IT WAS POTENTIALLY WONDERFUL.
YES!
YOU, WIDMARK, ARE GONNA SING IN THE GRAND FINALE!
SECURITY SYSTEM INSTALLED, FIVE-CAMERA SETUP.
TWO IN THE LIVING ROOM, ENTRYWAY, HALLWAY, KITCHEN.
COULD I TAKE A LOOK AT YOUR LOG FOR FOWLER'S PHONE CALLS?
I-I MEAN, IF I PUT IN A REQUEST TO HOME OFFICE --
AH, IT TAKES FOREVER.
PENCIL PUSHERS DON'T UNDERSTAND
WHAT IT'S LIKE FOR US OUT IN THE FIELD,
FACE-TO-FACE WITH CRIME.
YEAH, NOSE TO NOSE WITH EVIL.
I CAN HEAR THAT.
THE FILES ARE IN HERE.
[ BEEPING ]
WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?
FBI.
THERE ARE CAMERAS EVERYWHERE.
YOU PEOPLE DON'T NEED TO BE IN HERE.
[ BEEPING ]
[ BEEPING INTENSIFIES ]
OUT OF EVERY KID IN THE ENTIRE SCHOOL,
SHE PICKS HIM FOR THE SHOWCASE PERFORMANCE?
D-D-DOES SHE EVEN KNOW WHO HE IS?
A STUDENT WHO --
WHOSE FATHER RIPPED OFF EVERYONE IN THIS SCHOOL.
I'M A MONEY MANAGER.
I PUT MILLIONS OF MY CLIENTS' ACCOUNTS WITH HIM.
WE LOST EVERYTHING, AND THERE ISN'T A PARENT IN THIS SCHOOL
WHO DOESN'T HAVE THE SAME STORY.
[ German accent ] JA, IT'S NOT OUR PHILOSOPHY TO PUNISH THE KINDER
FOR THE SINS OF THEIR PARENTS, MR. SANFORD.
AND MS. DONOVAN, SHE ASSURES ME
THAT WIDMARK'S STARRING ROLE IN THE, UH...
THE SCIENCE-SICAL.
JA, SCIENCE-SICAL IS BASED SOLELY ON MERIT.
NOW, IF YOU EXCUSE ME, I HAVE A LOT OF WORK TO DO, PLEASE.
GOOD AFTERNOON. NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN.
GOODBYE.
GOODBYE, GOODBYE, GOODBYE.
[ SIGHS ]
[ Normal voice ] COULD YOU JUST PLEASE TRY
TO MAYBE NOT MAKE THIS SO DIFFICULT?
I CAN'T TAKE YOU SERIOUSLY WITH THAT DEAD CAT ON YOUR HEAD.
[ Sighing ] ELIOT HAD TROUBLE ADJUSTING, ALL RIGHT?
BUT HE FOUND A WAY
TO MAKE HIS STYLE WORK IN THIS SETTING, SO...
[ YELLS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE ]
HAI! PAIN! HONOR! STRENGTH!
ALL RIGHT.
COME AT ME!
[ ALL SCREAMING ]
LOOK, IT'S THE BEST I COULD MANAGE UNDER SUCH SHORT NOTICE.
THE PROPS ARE MADE,
THE KIDS HAVE MEMORIZED THEIR PRESENTATIONS.
I'M JUST SETTING IT TO A BIT OF MUSIC.
LISTEN, I MEAN, LET'S NOT FORGET WHY WE'RE HERE.
LET'S NOT LOSE FOCUS.
I MEAN, THE OBJECT IS TO GET FOWLER
OUT OF THE APARTMENT, NOT --
WHAT? NOT -- NOT WIDMARK. RIGHT, YEAH, I GET IT.
HE'S JUST THE BAIT.
COME ON, THAT'S NOT FAIR.
WHAT'S NOT FAIR IS THE WAY PEOPLE SEE HIM.
HIS FATHER SEES HIM AS A LOSER.
HIS MOTHER SEES HIM AS THIS FRAGILE, LITTLE BABY.
HIS SCHOOLMATES SEE HIM
AS THE BOY WHOSE FATHER STOLE CHRISTMAS.
I JUST THINK HE -- HE -- HE...
[ SIGHS ]
I JUST WANT PEOPLE TO SEE HIM AS HE REALLY IS.
HE DESERVES THAT.
EVERYBODY DOES.
[ BOTH SIGH ]
THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS.
[ SCOFFS ]
RICH GUYS AND THEIR CRAZY SECURITY SYSTEMS.
DOOR ALARM'S GOT A TAKASHITA 500 WITH REDUNDANT INFRARED.
-WINDOW'S EASIER. -THE WINDOW?
THE WINDOW THAT'S 20 STORIES UP?
LIKE I SAID -- EASIER.
I'VE DONE THIS A MILLION TIMES.
ALL I NEED IS A PNEUMATIC DRILL, SOME DIAMOND BITS --
[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]
GET THE...
HEY.
UH, HI. HEY.
-OH, UH, THANKS. -HEY, WHAT'S UP?
THAT ONE'S ACTUALLY MINE.
UH, I JUST HAD MY LIPS ON THAT.
IT'S LIKE I GAVE YOU A LITTLE COFFEE KISS.
[ LAUGHS ]
I THINK YOUR PARTNER IS SWEET ON McSWEETEN.
-WHAT? NO. -I DON'T REALLY TALK ABOUT...
WELL [CLEARS THROAT] ANYWAY,
UH, THE JUDGE APPROVED FOWLER'S DAY PASS
SO HE CAN GO SEE SOME PLAY HIS KID IS DOING AT SCHOOL.
FINAL-FREAKING-LY, MAN!
I-I LOVE THE THEATER.
IT'S -- "CATS."
R-R-REOW!
ALL RIGHT, WELL, SEE YOU DOWNSTAIRS IN A COUPLE OF MINUTES.
UM, WHAT?
YOU'RE OUR BACKUP. YOU'RE COMING ALONG WITH, RIGHT?
-YEAH. YEAH. -YOU GOT OUR BACK, RIGHT?
-WE -- WE -- WE -- YO, WE -- YEAH.
-WE GOT YOUR BACK. -OKAY.
-UH -- -GOOD.
I GOT A COUPON.
[ CHUCKLES ] NATE...
we got a problem.
-STRAIGHTEN THAT ONE OUT. -WELL, SO DO WE.
IT'S FINAL REHEARSAL, AND SO FAR WIDMARK HASN'T SUNG A NOTE.
[ Off-key ] * YOU
[ LAUGHTER ]
-HEY! -SHH!
HEY! [ LAUGHTER ]
THE CAMERA'S CHARGED, RIGHT?
I DON'T WANT TO MISS A SECOND.
SIR, I'M GONNA HAVE TO CHECK THAT BAG.
OH, UH, HEY, GUYS, C-CAN WE GET A MINUTE?
LOOK, UH, QUICK UPDATE.
ONE OF US IS GONNA HAVE TO STAY UPSTAIRS
WITH THE SURVEILLANCE EQUIPMENT.
LUCKY ME.
OKAY.
WELL, WE ONLY REALLY NEED TWO AGENTS ON FOWLER,
SO WHY DON'T WE SWITCH UP?
[ CHUCKLES ] YEAH. YEAH, T-THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.
YOU KNOW, I COULD JUST STAY HERE WITH AGENT HAGEN.
YEAH.
UH, Y-YOU KNOW WHAT?
H-HAGEN, YOU GO WITH THE GUYS.
MORE MANPOWER FOR THE SUSPECT.
I'LL BABYSIT THE EQUIPMENT.
OKAY.
[ CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY ]
What are you doing?
LOOK, AGENT McSWEETHEART IS GONNA GO WHEREVER YOU GO,
SO YOU -- YOU GOT TO GO TO THE SCHOOL,
AND I'M JUST -- JUST TALK ME THROUGH THE BREAK-IN.
TALK ME -- JUST...
AFTER YOU. [ ELEVATOR DINGS ]
[ CHUCKLES ]
ALL THAT PERSONAL SPACE.
[ SIGHS ]
GOOD LUCK.
Uh, Sophie, we good to go?
UH, UH...
NO, EVERYTHING'S GONNA BE FINE AS SOON AS I...
FIND WIDMARK.
[ BEEPING ]
Hardison, what's going on? What's your status?
I JUST LOOPED THE FBI VIDEO FEED,
SO NOBODY WILL SEE ME IN THE APARTMENT,
ASSUMING I GET IN THE APARTMENT.
[ German accent ] PLEASE TAKE YOUR SEAT NOW.
HURRY. HURRY ALONG.
[ Normal voice ] ALL RIGHT, OUR MAN HAS ARRIVED.
THE CURTAIN GOES UP IN FIVE MINUTES, ONE WAY OR THE OTHER.
DON'T WAIT FOR SOPHIE.
[ WIDMARK SNIFFLING ]
WIDMARK?
[ SNIFFLES ]
[ German accent ] PLEASE TAKE YOUR SEAT.
RUN ALONG. HURRY.
HURRY UP, HURRY UP.
YOU SURE YOU CAN HANDLE THIS?
OH, YEAH.
WHAT'S THE WORST THAT CAN HAPPEN?
Well, you could tangle the lines.
HEY!
CAN YOU BELIEVE THEY HAVE A SMOOTHIE SHOP IN THIS PLACE?
[ CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY ]
WHAT WERE YOU SAYING?
OH, I WAS JUST WORRIED ABOUT THE PLAY.
AND THE ACTORS IF THEY CROSS THEIR LINES.
THEY COULD REALLY FALL ON THEIR FACE.
AAH! OHH!
UNH! [ MOANS ]
I'M GOOD! [ MOANS ] I'M GOOD!
WIDMARK, Y-Y-YOU CAN'T LET THEM WIN.
Y-YOU CAN'T SHOW THEM THAT THEY'RE GETTING TO YOU.
[ Normal voice ] Sophie, no. No.
-WHAT? -J-Just talk to him.
DON'T TELL HIM WHAT TO DO OR WHO TO BE.
JUST TALK.
[ GROANS ]
[ BEEPING ]
WIDMARK, I'M SORRY.
FOR WHAT?
FOR TRYING TO CON YOU INTO BEING BRAVE, AND...
THAT'S WHAT I DO. I'M A BLOODY CON ARTIST.
LOOK, I'M NOT VERY GOOD AT BEING HONEST,
NOT EVEN WITH MY FRIENDS.
DO YOU HAVE A LOT OF FRIENDS?
NO.
NO, I-I NEVER USED TO HAVE ANY.
BUT, UM, NOW, YES, I-I DO -- A FEW.
I USED TO HAVE FRIENDS.
THEY DON'T TALK TO ME ANYMORE BECAUSE OF WHAT MY STEPDAD DID.
THAT'S GOT NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.
YOU KNOW THAT, DON'T YOU?
THEN WHY DID THEY MAKE FUN OF ME?
'CAUSE WHEN THEY LOOK AT YOU, THEY SEE HIM.
THEY'RE NOT SEEING YOU FOR WHO YOU REALLY ARE.
[ BEEPING CONTINUES ]
HOW MUCH TIME DO I HAVE LEFT, PARKER?
DO YOU BELIEVE IN LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT?
I BELIEVE THAT WHEN YOU MEET SOMEONE,
YOU HAVE 30 SECONDS [SLURPS]
BEFORE THE BELLS AND WHISTLES GO OFF.
DON'T BE AFRAID TO OVERRIDE YOUR FEELINGS.
[ SLURPS ] DON'T BE BLUE.
MM-HMM, MM-HMM. OKAY, I GOT YOU.
30 SECONDS, "DON'T BE BLUE," OVERRIDE.
W-WAIT, DOES THAT MEAN CUT THE BLUE WIRE
OR DON'T CUT THE BLUE WIRE, PARKER?
THAT IS -- THAT IS SO TRUE.
I THINK YOU NEED TO BE HONEST --
20 SECONDS.
I CAN'T COUNT IN 20 SECONDS HOW MANY BLUE WIRES THERE ARE.
-PARKER, HELP ME OUT. -NOT FOLLOWING.
YOU JUST HAVE TO CUT LOOSE.
Output your feelings.
-SNIP THAT BLUE MOOD IN THE-- -The output?
OUTPUT? OKAY, I GOT IT. GOTCHA.
[ BEEPING CONTINUES ] OUT, OUT, OUT, OUT.
COME HERE, YOU BLUE. GOT IT.
[ CHUCKLES ]
[ SIGHS ]
DADDY'S HOME.
DID YOU KNOW I WAS AN ACTRESS?
-NO. -MM-HMM.
ARE YOU GOOD?
WELL, OTHERS DON'T SEEM TO THINK SO.
MAYBE THEY JUST CAN'T SEE YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE.
[ CHUCKLES ]
DO YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY ABOUT ACTING?
THEY SAY IT'S ABOUT TELLING THE TRUTH,
ABOUT -- ABOUT SHARING A LITTLE PART OF YOURSELF
THAT PEOPLE DON'T NORMALLY SEE.
BUT IF YOU DON'T -- IF YOU DON'T REALLY KNOW YOURSELF,
THEN THEY THINK YOU'RE LYING.
AND...
I THINK THAT'S MY PROBLEM.
I'VE BEEN LYING FOR SO LONG, THAT, UM,
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE TRUTH IS ANYMORE.
I DON'T WANT TO LIE TO ANYBODY.
NO.
NO, YOU DON'T HAVE TO, WIDMARK.
WHAT YOU NEED TO DO IS, YOU JUST HAVE TO GO OUT THERE
AND BE WIDMARK.
JUST TELL THE TRUTH. BE -- BE WHO YOU REALLY ARE.
IF YOU CAN DO THAT, THEN I PROMISE YOU,
PEOPLE WILL BELIEVE IN YOU.
SURE IS TAKING THEM A LONG TIME TO GET EVERYBODY IN THERE.
[ SIGHS ] YES.
A LOT LONGER THAN I THOUGHT.
E-EXCUSE ME FOR INTERRUPTING PROM NIGHT
WITH MY ANNOYING FELONY BURGLARY.
SHE'S UNGRATEFUL -- JUST UNGRATEFUL.
AHA!
COME TO PAPA.
WIDMARK OKAY?
GUESS WE'RE ABOUT TO FIND OUT.
[ BEEPING ]
[ LAUGHS ]
YEAH! HACKING, RAPPELLING --
whatever, put me in a dress.
I CAN DO ALL Y'ALL'S JOBS.
IT'S EMPTY.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S EMPTY?
I MEAN IT'S EMPTY, LIKE SOMEBODY CLEANED IT OUT.
I HATE TO TELL YOU THIS,
BUT THAT AIN'T OUR BIGGEST PROBLEM RIGHT NOW.
WE'VE GOT COMPANY.
* THERE ARE MANY TYPES OF CLOUDS *
* LIKE STRATUS, CUMULUS, AND NIMBUS *
* NIMBUS SAID TO A GLUM-LOOKING CLOUD *
* "PLEASE DON'T BE SO CIRRUS"
* CLOUDS ARE HIGH UP IN THE SKY *
YEAH, BUT HOW'D HE KNOW FOWLER WAS GONNA BE HERE?
ONLY ONES THAT KNEW WERE US AND THE FBI.
UH, YEAH, AND FOWLER HIMSELF.
MAYBE WE WERE WRONG. MAYBE FOWLER ISN'T THE TARGET.
Then who?
-WHAT? -THANK YOU.
FOR THIS DELICIOUS SMOOTHIE, AGENT.
OH.
UM...
HIS FBI HANDLERS --
FOWLER'S ARRANGED TO HAVE THEM KILLED.
HE'S ABOUT TO RUN.
NO, THERE'S NO WAY HE COULD ARRANGE THAT, MAN.
HE'S UNDER HOUSE ARREST -- NO PHONE CALLS, NO INTERNET.
THEY'RE EVEN READING HIS MAIL. HOW COULD HE ARRANGE A HIT MAN?
LET'S ASK HIM.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU LOST IT?
-I THOUGHT IT WAS IN MY ROOM. -YOU THOUGHT?
DO YOU HAVE ANY RESPECT FOR YOUR PERSONAL PROPERTY?
DO YOU HAVE ANY RESPECT FOR ME? I BOUGHT YOU THAT CELLPHONE.
FEDS CONFISCATED HIS CELLPHONE.
THEY DIDN'T TAKE WIDMARK'S.
* YOU WILL SEE IN THE...
FOWLER'S GETAWAY EXPLAINS THE EMPTY SAFE.
WHATEVER CASH HE HAD ON HIM, HE TOOK WITH HIM.
AND, UH, I THINK I KNOW WHERE TO LOOK.
* STORM CLOUD [ APPLAUSE ]
-WAIT, DIDN'T YOU SEARCH FOWLER BEFORE HE LEFT? -OF COURSE.
NOTHING ON HIM EXCEPT FOR THAT CAMERA AND SOME TAPES.
YEAH, WELL, THERE'S SOMETHING IN THAT BAG.
Or on those tapes. [ APPLAUSE ]
[ CHUCKLES ] THANK YOU.
SOPHIE, CAN YOU SWIPE IT?
Um, yes, I'm a little bit busy here.
...JUILLIARD FOR THAT WONDERFUL RENDITION
OF "HOW CLOUDS ARE FORMED."
AND NOW WE HAVE MILAN WITH A BALLAD ABOUT PHOTOSYNTHESIS.
ENJOY. [ APPLAUSE ]
HAS ANYBODY SEEN WIDMARK?
Sophie, the job's over.
What happens from here on is not our concern.
-NO WAY. -We have other priorities.
THE CLINIC ISN'T THE ONLY VICTIM HERE, NATE.
I-I DIDN'T PROP UP THIS BOY JUST TO SEE HIM FAIL.
NO WAY. I'M NOT LETTING THAT HAPPEN.
YO, WHAT'S UP?
UNH! OHH!
Uh, Nate...
THIS PHONE HAS SENT A BUNCH OF TEXT MESSAGES
IN THE LAST 48 HOURS TO SOME GUY NAMED "SKYLER."
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. SKYLER'S A KID AT THE SCHOOL.
WHY WOULD FOWLER BE TEXTING A MIDDLE-SCHOOLER?
[ BEEP ]
* PHOTOSYNTHESIS IS THE CAUSE OF THIS... *
[ CELLPHONE VIBRATING ]
* ...PROCESS THAT MAKES THINGS BIGGER *
* WATER AND LIGHT MAKES...
HE WASN'T TEXTING SKYLER. HE WAS TEXTING SKYLER'S DAD.
OH!
SORRY.
* I'VE BEEN...
MARK SANFORD'S AN ACCOMPLICE.
HE SET UP THE GUNMAN. HE JUST TRADED BAGS WITH FOWLER.
[ SINGING INDISTINCTLY ]
No, man, why would Sanford help Fowler?
Isn't he one of the guys who invested with him?
* REALLY
* A GAS
[ PIANO MUSIC PLAYING ]
SORRY I'M LATE.
NO, NO, NO. [ APPLAUSE ]
YOU'RE RIGHT ON TIME.
[ BOTH GRUNTING ]
AND NOW WITH "GROWTH FACTORS IN BREAD MOLD,"
IT'S WIDMARK FOWLER!
[ APPLAUSE ]
OH.
[ SLOW PIANO MUSIC PLAYS ]
* YOU MIGHT FIND THIS DISTASTEFUL *
* OR CALL IT JUST PLAIN GROSS
* TO SING IN PRAISE OF BREAD MOLD *
* OR WONDER HOW IT GROWS
* IT EVEN MAKES YOU CRAZY THAT MOLD DEVOURS YOUR FOOD *
* UNTIL YOU FIND I'VE CHANGED YOUR MIND *
* AND YOU SEE THAT MOLD IS GOOD *
[ MUSIC TEMPO INCREASES ]
[ BOTH GRUNTING ]
SHH!
* IT'S THE MUSHROOMS ON YOUR PIZZA *
* IT'S THE YEAST THAT MAKES THE CRUST RISE *
SHH! KEEP IT OFF THE STAGE!
YOU'RE GONNA RUIN HIS BIG FINALE!
* IT'S FUNGI
* THAT'S GOOD EATEN -- DON'T LOOK SURPRISED *
AND WHILE WE'RE ON THE SUBJECT...
* WHO AMONG US WOULD WANT THE NASTY JOB THAT FUNGUS HAS? *
* SCARFING DOWN TOXIC WASTE?
* MOLDS GO WHERE THEY'RE NEEDED *
* SO THEY FIND OUR STUFF TO FEED IN *
* MOLDS JUST WANT TO GROW
* SO THEY POP OUT SPORES, YOU KNOW *
* THAT A MOLD WANTS TO THRIVE
* NEEDS MUCH MORE THAN TO SURVIVE *
* BECAUSE MOLD'S LIKE US
* JUST LOV BEING ALI-I-I-I-FE
HE'S NOT BAD.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
EXCUSE ME, DEAR.
OH, WIDMARK, I'M SO PROUD OF YOU.
[ CLEARS THROAT ]
AH.
Uh...
Uh, Hardison, are you at your computer?
I need you to check a name for me.
GO AHEAD.
[ APPLAUSE ] DOUG FINEMAN.
AND FIRST PLACE GOES TO MR. WIDMARK FOWLER!
[ APPLAUSE ]
SANFORD IS PROVIDING FOWLER WITH A NEW IDENTITY
AND A NEW LIFE WAITING FOR HIM IN...
BOGOTá.
OH, COACH BREWER!
-OHH! -I'LL TAKE THAT.
OW!
AHH.
YES.
I'M JUST SAYING
YOU CAN'T MAKE THE RETURNS TOO CONSISTENT.
10% GROWTH EVERY YEAR, NO MATTER WHAT THE MARKET DOES?
THE S.E.C. IS GOING TO ASK QUESTIONS.
LET ME WORRY ABOUT THE S.E.C., MARK.
BUT WE HAVE TO BE CAREFUL.
MY JOB IS TO BUY OFF THE REGULATORS.
YOUR JOB IS TO BRING IN NEW MONEY.
NOW, THIS WHOLE THING GOES OFF THE RAILS
WHEN YOU STOP DOING YOUR JOB.
UNH! AGH!
WHERE THE HECK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?
[ GRUNTS ] [ HANDCUFFS CLICK ]
[ German accent ] JA, JA, HE, UM, HE DROPPED THIS OUT OF THIS.
I THOUGHT HIS NAME WAS FOWLER.
-I DON'T KNOW. -THANKS.
- JA, JA. -COME ON!
NO, STOP IT! YOU CAN'T PLAY THAT!
[ HANDCUFFS CLICK ] AGH!
NOW, THAT IS NO WAY TO TREAT A LADY.
-COME ON. -OW!
-HI. -HEY.
GOT SOMETHING FOR YOU.
WOW, THAT IS FAR MORE THAN WE LOST.
WELL, YOU KNOW THE $20 MILLION THE FEDS COULDN'T FIND?
FOWLER HAD IT IN AN OVERSEAS ACCOUNT
USING ONE OF HIS ALIASES.
YEAH, HE STRUCK A DEAL WITH SANFORD.
HE TRADED THE TAPES FOR A NEW PASSPORT AND TWO DEAD FBI GUYS.
AND OUR FRIEND HARDISON, WELL, HE LIBERATED SOME OF THE CASH
SO YOU COULD USE IT FOR YOUR CLINIC.
-WOW. -HEY, KAY!
HI, CLAUDINE.
SHE, UM, NEEDED A JOB AFTER FOWLER WENT TO JAIL.
-GOOD LUCK. -THANK YOU.
YOU KNOW, THIS IS INTERESTING.
THIS MUST BE A-A FIRST.
I MEAN, IT'S THE ONLY TIME I CAN REMEMBER
THAT THE CON DEPENDED SOLELY ON YOU TELLING THE TRUTH.
HOW'D IT FEEL?
EH, GOOD. DON'T GET USED TO IT.
-OH, NO. NO. -UNH-UNH.
START TELLING THE TRUTH ALL DAY...
STOP BEING SOPHIE DEVEREAUX.
MAYBE THAT'S, UH...
A GOOD THING.
MNH-MNH.