1 00:00:03,918 --> 00:00:05,585 >> Xavier: [ Echoing ] WHAT IS 2 00:00:05,668 --> 00:00:07,251 THIS PLACE, AND WHO AM I? 3 00:00:07,085 --> 00:00:08,501 I DON'T REMEMBER MY NAME. 4 00:00:08,585 --> 00:00:10,085 ALL I REMEMBER IS THAT I DON'T 5 00:00:10,168 --> 00:00:12,543 KNOW MY NAME AND THAT I CAN'T 6 00:00:12,626 --> 00:00:14,960 REMEMBER IF I DO KNOW MY, UM, 7 00:00:15,043 --> 00:00:17,251 UH, I HAVE THE STRANGE FEELING 8 00:00:17,335 --> 00:00:19,876 THAT I'VE FORGOTTEN ALL OF THIS 9 00:00:19,960 --> 00:00:20,960 BEFORE. 10 00:00:21,043 --> 00:00:22,918 I FORGET IF I REMEMBER THAT 11 00:00:23,001 --> 00:00:24,918 THESE DOORS HAVE ALWAYS BEEN 12 00:00:25,001 --> 00:00:26,001 HERE. 13 00:00:26,085 --> 00:00:27,168 I TRIED THE BLUE ONE. 14 00:00:27,251 --> 00:00:28,501 >> HURRY! TAKE THE GUN, MAN! 15 00:00:28,585 --> 00:00:29,168 >> Xavier: HUH? 16 00:00:29,251 --> 00:00:30,210 WHAT IS THIS FOR? 17 00:00:30,293 --> 00:00:31,126 >> COME ON! 18 00:00:31,210 --> 00:00:32,460 DID YOU FORGET EVERYTHING?! 19 00:00:32,543 --> 00:00:33,543 WE WENT OVER THIS! 20 00:00:33,626 --> 00:00:35,251 YOU'RE IN CHARGE OF SECURITY FOR 21 00:00:35,335 --> 00:00:36,043 THE MAYOR! 22 00:00:36,126 --> 00:00:37,751 >> Xavier: NO COMPADRE YOUR 23 00:00:37,835 --> 00:00:38,751 SPEEKY-SPANIOL. 24 00:00:38,835 --> 00:00:39,418 ENGLISH? 25 00:00:39,501 --> 00:00:40,585 >> THIS TOWN ELECTED A DONKEY 26 00:00:40,668 --> 00:00:42,085 MAYOR AS A SCATHING INDICTMENT 27 00:00:42,168 --> 00:00:43,418 OF OUR JACKASS POLITICAL SYSTEM, 28 00:00:43,501 --> 00:00:44,960 BUT THE POWERS THAT BE WANT HIM 29 00:00:45,043 --> 00:00:45,168 DEAD! 30 00:00:45,251 --> 00:00:46,126 'MEMBER? 31 00:00:46,210 --> 00:00:47,251 YOU'VE GOT TO PROTECT HIM. 32 00:00:47,335 --> 00:00:49,335 [ GUNSHOT, DONKEY BRAYS ] 33 00:00:49,418 --> 00:00:50,585 >> IT WAS HIM! 34 00:00:50,668 --> 00:00:51,543 I SAW HIM DO IT! 35 00:00:51,626 --> 00:00:52,960 WHY ELSE WOULD HE HAVE A GUN?! 36 00:00:53,043 --> 00:00:53,876 >> Xavier: HEE-HUH? 37 00:00:53,960 --> 00:00:54,585 [ GAVEL BANGS ] 38 00:00:54,668 --> 00:00:56,085 I SWEAR, I DIDN'T SHOOT THE 39 00:00:56,168 --> 00:00:56,710 MAYOR. 40 00:00:56,793 --> 00:00:58,335 >> YOU ARE NOT ON TRIAL FOR 41 00:00:58,418 --> 00:00:59,876 SHOOTING THE MAYOR. 42 00:00:59,960 --> 00:01:01,876 YOU ARE ON TRIAL FOR BEING ON 43 00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:02,960 TRIAL. 44 00:01:03,043 --> 00:01:05,085 >> Xavier: BUT I'M INNOCENT. 45 00:01:05,168 --> 00:01:06,751 >> BY PROCLAIMING YOUR 46 00:01:06,835 --> 00:01:09,085 INNOCENCE, IT PROVES YOU'RE ON 47 00:01:09,168 --> 00:01:09,710 TRIAL. 48 00:01:09,793 --> 00:01:11,835 WHAT SAY YOU, JURY? 49 00:01:11,918 --> 00:01:14,210 [ ALL BABBLING ] 50 00:01:14,043 --> 00:01:16,710 IT'S A JURY OF YOUR MENTAL 51 00:01:16,793 --> 00:01:17,626 PEERS. 52 00:01:17,710 --> 00:01:19,043 >> Xavier: WHAT SORT OF LAW IS 53 00:01:19,126 --> 00:01:19,751 THIS? 54 00:01:19,835 --> 00:01:23,126 >> LAWS? LAWS ARE ILLEGAL HERE! 55 00:01:23,210 --> 00:01:24,085 GUILTY! 56 00:01:24,168 --> 00:01:27,126 I SENTENCE THEE TO THREE 57 00:01:27,210 --> 00:01:30,668 GLIMPSES INTO YOUR OWN SOUL. 58 00:01:30,751 --> 00:01:31,418 >> Xavier: [ SCOFFS ] 59 00:01:31,501 --> 00:01:33,210 I COULD DO THAT WITH MY THIRD 60 00:01:33,293 --> 00:01:34,918 EYE TIED BEHIND MY BACK. 61 00:01:35,001 --> 00:01:38,418 >> VERY WELL. SEVEN GLIMPSES! 62 00:01:38,501 --> 00:01:40,168 >> Xavier: NO-O-O-O! 63 00:01:40,251 --> 00:01:42,126 >> AND AS YOUR NEW MAYOR, I 64 00:01:42,210 --> 00:01:44,085 DECLARE THE CONCERNS OF THIS 65 00:01:44,168 --> 00:01:46,001 TOWNSHIP SHALL NO LONGER BE 66 00:01:46,085 --> 00:01:47,960 DONKEY CONCERNS BUT SHALL BE 67 00:01:48,043 --> 00:01:49,460 HUMAN CONCERNS. 68 00:01:49,543 --> 00:01:51,001 AND I VOW TO PROTECT THE 69 00:01:51,085 --> 00:01:52,626 CHILDREN OF THIS TOWN FROM OUR 70 00:01:52,710 --> 00:01:54,751 LOCAL HUMAN-BABY RAPIST... 71 00:01:54,835 --> 00:01:56,043 AND A GAS-TAX HOLIDAY! 72 00:01:56,126 --> 00:01:57,126 [ CROWD CHEERING ] 73 00:01:57,210 --> 00:01:58,168 THANK YOU! 74 00:01:58,251 --> 00:02:00,293 [ APPLAUSE ] 75 00:02:00,376 --> 00:02:02,126 >> Xavier: I HAVEN'T FORGOTTEN 76 00:02:02,210 --> 00:02:02,751 YOU. 77 00:02:02,835 --> 00:02:04,126 I KNOW WHAT YOUR BUTT DID TO 78 00:02:04,210 --> 00:02:05,960 THAT BOY! 79 00:02:06,043 --> 00:02:08,376 THIS MUST MEAN I SAVED A LIFE. 80 00:02:08,460 --> 00:02:10,210 I'M SOME SORT OF LIFE SAVIOR? 81 00:02:10,043 --> 00:02:11,918 WONDER WHERE'S MY REWARD. 82 00:02:12,001 --> 00:02:13,960 BINGO DOODLE ATTAINMENT OF MORE 83 00:02:14,043 --> 00:02:15,751 ENLIGHTENED LEVEL OF BEING! 84 00:02:15,835 --> 00:02:17,835 I HAVE GRADUATED TO THIS 85 00:02:17,918 --> 00:02:19,085 ADVANCED REALM. 86 00:02:19,168 --> 00:02:21,126 IT FEELS SO RIGHT. 87 00:02:21,210 --> 00:02:24,126 I'VE NEVER FELT MORE -- OH! 88 00:02:24,210 --> 00:02:25,251 >> [ CHOMPS ] 89 00:02:25,335 --> 00:02:27,168 >> Xavier: WHAT IS ALL THIS? 90 00:02:27,251 --> 00:02:27,710 A TEST? 91 00:02:27,793 --> 00:02:29,043 REVEAL YOUR INTENTIONS! 92 00:02:29,126 --> 00:02:31,001 SHOW EITHER YOUR FACE OR YOUR 93 00:02:31,085 --> 00:02:32,126 BODY -- OOH! 94 00:02:32,210 --> 00:02:33,085 >> SOON. 95 00:02:33,168 --> 00:02:34,710 >> Xavier: I DON'T HAVE TO STAND 96 00:02:34,793 --> 00:02:36,001 HERE AND TAKE LIP FROM THE 97 00:02:36,085 --> 00:02:36,710 LIPLESS. 98 00:02:36,793 --> 00:02:37,960 I'M LEAVING, LIKE A TREE MAKES. 99 00:02:38,043 --> 00:02:38,793 [ GRUNTS ] 100 00:02:38,876 --> 00:02:40,335 YOU CAN CONSUME MY DUST. 101 00:02:40,418 --> 00:02:42,710 DON'T LET MY ANUS MUDCAKE YOUR 102 00:02:42,793 --> 00:02:44,168 DOOR ON MY WAY OUT. 103 00:02:44,251 --> 00:02:45,668 YOU CAN FLUSH ME FROMST THE 104 00:02:45,751 --> 00:02:47,126 TOILETTE OF YOUR MIND, BECAUSE 105 00:02:47,210 --> 00:02:48,543 I'M PISSED-TORY. 106 00:02:48,626 --> 00:02:50,835 YOU CAN KISS AND LICK AND CARESS 107 00:02:50,918 --> 00:02:53,043 AND CODDLE AND SWALLOW MY SWEET 108 00:02:53,126 --> 00:02:54,085 ASS GOODBYE. 109 00:02:54,168 --> 00:02:55,085 AND TAKE YOUR TIME. 110 00:02:55,168 --> 00:02:56,460 I'LL BE HERE ALL DAY. 111 00:02:56,543 --> 00:02:58,585 FINE. I'LL RUB IT MYSELF. 112 00:02:58,668 --> 00:03:01,126 [ MAN SPEAKING BACKWARDS ] 113 00:03:01,210 --> 00:03:02,168 I'M TOO LATE. 114 00:03:02,251 --> 00:03:04,293 IF I'D ABETTED THIS POOR MEAT 115 00:03:04,376 --> 00:03:06,251 IN TIME, HE'D STILL BE A 116 00:03:06,085 --> 00:03:08,460 DELICIOUS MAN. 117 00:03:08,543 --> 00:03:09,376 HEALED?! 118 00:03:09,460 --> 00:03:11,710 IN THIS ODD DOMINION, DRIVING 119 00:03:11,793 --> 00:03:14,085 BACKWARDS OVER PEOPLE CAN MEND 120 00:03:14,168 --> 00:03:14,543 THEM. 121 00:03:14,626 --> 00:03:15,793 PEOPLE, HURRY! 122 00:03:15,876 --> 00:03:17,043 GET IN THE WAY! 123 00:03:17,126 --> 00:03:18,710 I'M COMMITTING VEHICULAR 124 00:03:18,793 --> 00:03:20,626 MAN-BURGER HELPER, AND IT TASTES 125 00:03:20,710 --> 00:03:22,168 LIKE PURE LIQUID RELIEF. 126 00:03:22,251 --> 00:03:23,585 BEST PART IS I'M HELPING THE 127 00:03:23,668 --> 00:03:25,210 EARTH, GETTING NEGATIVE-30 MILES 128 00:03:25,043 --> 00:03:25,876 TO THE GALLON. 129 00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:26,751 [ SIREN WAILING ] 130 00:03:26,835 --> 00:03:28,668 OH, THE COPS WANT TO HORN IN 131 00:03:28,751 --> 00:03:29,960 ON MY HEAL DEAL. 132 00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:31,585 I'LL LET 'EM CO-BASK IN MY 133 00:03:31,668 --> 00:03:32,793 REFLECTED GLORY. 134 00:03:32,876 --> 00:03:33,501 HUH. 135 00:03:33,585 --> 00:03:35,085 I SEEM TO HAVE BRUISES AND LUMPS 136 00:03:35,168 --> 00:03:37,251 ON MY FACE. 137 00:03:37,085 --> 00:03:38,543 FOUR WORDS, MEN. 138 00:03:38,626 --> 00:03:39,335 THANKS. 139 00:03:39,418 --> 00:03:42,293 COUNT 'EM 'N' WEEP. 140 00:03:42,376 --> 00:03:45,418 OOH, FREE SHRIMP. 141 00:03:45,501 --> 00:03:47,460 I DON'T FEEL SO GOOD. 142 00:03:47,543 --> 00:03:49,251 MY TUMMY HURTS. 143 00:03:49,085 --> 00:03:50,626 I'VE GOT TO HIT THE HEAD. 144 00:03:50,710 --> 00:03:51,501 IS IT THROUGH THERE? 145 00:03:51,585 --> 00:03:52,460 THIS ISN'T IT. 146 00:03:52,543 --> 00:03:53,168 [ SNIFFS ] 147 00:03:53,251 --> 00:03:55,126 SMELLS LIKE A REAL CREEP BEEN 148 00:03:55,210 --> 00:03:56,085 IN THIS ROOM. 149 00:03:56,168 --> 00:03:57,210 IS IT THROUGH HERE? 150 00:03:57,293 --> 00:03:58,835 I'LL JUST GO IN HERE. 151 00:03:58,918 --> 00:03:59,710 HEY! 152 00:03:59,793 --> 00:04:00,626 HEY! 153 00:04:00,710 --> 00:04:01,501 ANIMALS OUT THERE. 154 00:04:01,585 --> 00:04:03,751 SO THIS PLACE IS ALL RANDOM, 155 00:04:03,835 --> 00:04:04,418 HUH? 156 00:04:04,501 --> 00:04:06,626 OKAY, I'M GONNA GO IN... 157 00:04:06,710 --> 00:04:07,418 THAT DOOR. 158 00:04:07,501 --> 00:04:09,501 [ Echoing] OUT-RANDOMED. 159 00:04:09,585 --> 00:04:10,210 HUH. 160 00:04:10,293 --> 00:04:12,168 A LAND OF PRIMITIVE SIMPLETONS. 161 00:04:12,251 --> 00:04:14,668 I MUST BE HERE TO TUTOR THESE 162 00:04:14,751 --> 00:04:17,210 DARK DIM-DONGS. 163 00:04:17,043 --> 00:04:18,460 ATTENTION, PEOPLE. 164 00:04:18,543 --> 00:04:20,210 I SHALL SHINE MY RAYS O' 165 00:04:20,293 --> 00:04:22,543 ENLIGHTENMENT UNTO YOU, BRIGHTER 166 00:04:22,626 --> 00:04:24,168 THAN THE BIG GLOWING ORANGE 167 00:04:24,251 --> 00:04:26,126 THING -- THE, UH, WHATCHAMA-- 168 00:04:26,210 --> 00:04:28,126 YOU KNOW, THE BIG, DUMB HOT BALL 169 00:04:28,210 --> 00:04:28,918 IN THE SKY. 170 00:04:29,001 --> 00:04:30,793 >> THIS FREAK INSULT SUN GOD. 171 00:04:30,876 --> 00:04:32,543 WE MUST SACRIFICE A VIRGIN. 172 00:04:32,626 --> 00:04:34,376 >> Xavier: IF THESE BE MY LAST 173 00:04:34,460 --> 00:04:36,126 WORDS, THEN I'D LIKE TO LEAVE 174 00:04:36,210 --> 00:04:38,210 THIS WORLD WITH ONE THOUGHT -- 175 00:04:38,043 --> 00:04:39,626 ME NO WANNA DIE, MOMMY! 176 00:04:39,710 --> 00:04:40,460 [ WAILING ] 177 00:04:40,543 --> 00:04:42,335 >> WE NOW SACRIFICE THIS DEMON 178 00:04:42,418 --> 00:04:44,085 TO THE GREAT SUN GOD, 179 00:04:44,168 --> 00:04:45,751 QUETZECOITELAKALAKA-- 180 00:04:45,835 --> 00:04:48,168 [ GAGGING ] 181 00:04:48,251 --> 00:04:49,960 >> THE GREAT SUN GOD'S NAME 182 00:04:50,043 --> 00:04:51,501 CANNOT BE SPOKEN, FOR IT IS 183 00:04:51,585 --> 00:04:54,876 PRONOUNCED QUETZECO-- [ GAGGING] 184 00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:56,585 >> UH, LET'S JUST CUT TO 185 00:04:56,668 --> 00:04:57,501 SACRIFICE. 186 00:04:57,585 --> 00:04:58,418 >> Xavier: UGH! 187 00:04:58,501 --> 00:05:00,126 PLEASE GET MY MOMMY SO I CAN 188 00:05:00,210 --> 00:05:01,793 TELL ON YOU! 189 00:05:01,876 --> 00:05:03,335 YOU CAN'T SHUFFLE OFF THIS 190 00:05:03,418 --> 00:05:04,210 MORTAL-GOYLE. 191 00:05:04,293 --> 00:05:06,210 GUESS MY DEATH WASN'T IN THE 192 00:05:06,043 --> 00:05:07,751 TAROT THREE CARDS, MONTY. 193 00:05:07,835 --> 00:05:08,376 ZUMA! 194 00:05:08,460 --> 00:05:11,585 THIS SAC-RI-FARCE IS NO WAY TO 195 00:05:11,668 --> 00:05:13,168 APPEASE THE DEI-DEES. 196 00:05:13,251 --> 00:05:15,293 LET'S GIVE THIS SADIS-DICK 197 00:05:15,376 --> 00:05:17,460 SUN GOD A TASTE OF HIS OWN 198 00:05:17,543 --> 00:05:20,085 META-META SIN, MAN. 199 00:05:20,168 --> 00:05:21,918 GO SUMMON HIM. 200 00:05:22,001 --> 00:05:22,585 [ FANFARE ] 201 00:05:22,668 --> 00:05:24,168 LET'S SEE HOW YOU LIKE IT. 202 00:05:24,251 --> 00:05:28,418 >> [ PANTING ] 203 00:05:28,501 --> 00:05:30,126 >> Xavier: YOU PEOPLE HAVE 204 00:05:30,210 --> 00:05:31,418 ANGERED THE GODS! 205 00:05:31,501 --> 00:05:32,335 WHY?! 206 00:05:32,418 --> 00:05:34,043 BUT I HAVE AN IDEA. 207 00:05:34,126 --> 00:05:36,043 WE MUST SACRIFICE SOMEONE TO 208 00:05:36,126 --> 00:05:37,626 CUCKOLD AND PACIFY THIS 209 00:05:37,710 --> 00:05:42,460 MEXI-GLOBAL WAR, MANG. 210 00:05:42,543 --> 00:05:43,293 >> [ CHOMPS ] 211 00:05:43,376 --> 00:05:44,960 >> Xavier: I CAN'T BE A 212 00:05:45,043 --> 00:05:45,835 HYPO-GRIST. 213 00:05:45,918 --> 00:05:47,668 I'LL COMMIT SACRI-CIDE. 214 00:05:47,751 --> 00:05:48,876 [ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ] 215 00:05:48,960 --> 00:05:51,876 I BELIEVE I SAID "GOOD DAY," 216 00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:53,126 WEIRD ROOM. 217 00:05:53,210 --> 00:05:54,918 [ LIGHT MUSIC PLAYS ] 218 00:05:55,001 --> 00:06:00,293 [ BIRDS CHIRPING ] 219 00:06:00,376 --> 00:06:02,376 [ SQUISHING ] 220 00:06:02,460 --> 00:06:04,418 I KNEW IF I BODE MY TIME, I'D 221 00:06:04,501 --> 00:06:06,626 EVENTUALLY WIN MY WAY WITH YOU, 222 00:06:06,710 --> 00:06:08,251 LOVE. 223 00:06:08,335 --> 00:06:11,335 >> BUT I LOVED HIM. 224 00:06:11,418 --> 00:06:12,501 [ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ] 225 00:06:12,585 --> 00:06:14,043 >> Xavier: IF THIS IS YOUR IDEA 226 00:06:14,126 --> 00:06:15,043 OF A JOKE, I'D LIKE TO BE 227 00:06:15,126 --> 00:06:16,168 SUBJECTED TO A TRAGEDY. 228 00:06:16,251 --> 00:06:17,043 [ WIND WHISTLING ] 229 00:06:17,126 --> 00:06:19,210 WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?! 230 00:06:19,043 --> 00:06:21,168 >> DO YOU BELIEVE IN GOD? 231 00:06:21,251 --> 00:06:22,043 >> YES. 232 00:06:22,126 --> 00:06:24,251 >> DO YOU BELIEVE IN GOD? 233 00:06:24,335 --> 00:06:25,043 >> [ Crying ] YES. 234 00:06:25,126 --> 00:06:26,043 [ SHEEP BLEAT ] 235 00:06:26,126 --> 00:06:28,085 >> DO YOU BELIEVE IN GOD? 236 00:06:28,168 --> 00:06:29,751 >> Xavier: THAT'S A COMPLICATED 237 00:06:29,835 --> 00:06:30,418 QUESTION. 238 00:06:30,501 --> 00:06:31,835 IT DEPENDS ON WHAT YOU MEAN BY 239 00:06:31,918 --> 00:06:32,168 "GOD." 240 00:06:32,251 --> 00:06:33,126 YOU SEE, I -- 241 00:06:33,210 --> 00:06:33,793 >> YES OR NO! 242 00:06:33,876 --> 00:06:35,251 >> Xavier: IT HELPS NO ONE TO BE 243 00:06:35,335 --> 00:06:36,043 REDUCTIVE. 244 00:06:36,126 --> 00:06:38,085 I BELIEVE THAT THAT WE ARE HERE 245 00:06:38,168 --> 00:06:40,085 IMPLIES TO SOME DEGREE THAT 246 00:06:40,168 --> 00:06:42,210 THERE ARE FORCES LARGER THAN US. 247 00:06:42,043 --> 00:06:43,543 NOW, WE CAN GET INTO THE 248 00:06:43,626 --> 00:06:44,960 SEMANTICALITIES OF -- 249 00:06:45,043 --> 00:06:45,876 >> YES OR NO! 250 00:06:45,960 --> 00:06:47,210 >> Xavier: THE VERY NOTION OF 251 00:06:47,293 --> 00:06:48,293 BELIEF ITSELF CAN BE 252 00:06:48,376 --> 00:06:49,793 RHETORICALLY WHITTLED TO THE 253 00:06:49,876 --> 00:06:51,085 BARE NUB OF ITS MEANING. 254 00:06:51,168 --> 00:06:52,251 I'D LIKE TO TALK TO YOU A LOT 255 00:06:52,335 --> 00:06:53,251 MORE ABOUT THIS. 256 00:06:53,085 --> 00:06:54,251 WOULD YOU BE INTERESTED IN 257 00:06:54,335 --> 00:06:55,668 READING SOME OF MY LITERATURE? 258 00:06:55,751 --> 00:06:56,210 >> NO! 259 00:06:56,043 --> 00:06:57,293 [ GUNSHOT ] 260 00:06:57,376 --> 00:06:58,251 [ BEEP ] 261 00:06:58,085 --> 00:06:59,501 >> Xavier: SO, IT WAS ME ALL 262 00:06:59,585 --> 00:07:00,043 ALONG. 263 00:07:00,126 --> 00:07:01,251 NOW I UNDERSTAND WHAT'S 264 00:07:01,085 --> 00:07:02,043 HAPPENING IN HERE. 265 00:07:02,126 --> 00:07:03,585 I JUST NEED TO GO THROUGH THE 266 00:07:03,668 --> 00:07:05,168 BLACK DOOR. 267 00:07:05,251 --> 00:07:07,085 GOD HAS PUT ME THROUGH HIS 268 00:07:07,168 --> 00:07:08,918 REAMER, BUT I'VE COME OUT THE 269 00:07:09,001 --> 00:07:10,376 OTHER SIDE WITH HIS CALLING 270 00:07:10,460 --> 00:07:11,043 IN MY EAR. 271 00:07:11,126 --> 00:07:12,626 >> [ Crying ] THIS IS HOW 272 00:07:12,710 --> 00:07:13,918 STARVING PEOPLE CRY. 273 00:07:14,001 --> 00:07:15,126 >> Xavier: A CRYING LADY! 274 00:07:15,210 --> 00:07:16,793 I'LL HELP YOU. I'M A FEMINIST. 275 00:07:16,876 --> 00:07:18,168 I'LL MAKE SEXISM MY BITCH. 276 00:07:18,251 --> 00:07:19,501 SEXISM WILL BE LIKE... 277 00:07:19,585 --> 00:07:21,251 [ High-pitched voice ] "OOH, 278 00:07:21,085 --> 00:07:22,543 XAVIER, YOU'RE SO STRONG. 279 00:07:22,626 --> 00:07:24,251 KISSY, KISSY. YOU CAN HIT ME. 280 00:07:24,335 --> 00:07:25,085 I LIKE IT... 281 00:07:25,168 --> 00:07:26,501 [ Normal voice ] ROUGH"! 282 00:07:26,585 --> 00:07:27,876 >> HONEY, I FOUND A CORN 283 00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:28,543 NIBL-- HUH? 284 00:07:28,626 --> 00:07:30,001 HAVE YOU SEEN MY EX-WIFE? 285 00:07:30,085 --> 00:07:30,835 SHE WAS JUST HERE. 286 00:07:30,918 --> 00:07:32,043 >> Xavier: I HAVE SOME BAD NEWS 287 00:07:32,126 --> 00:07:33,210 AND A SNACK FOR YOU. 288 00:07:33,043 --> 00:07:35,376 HOW CAN I BREAK THIS EASY? 289 00:07:35,460 --> 00:07:37,710 >> DO I SMELL FOOD? 290 00:07:37,793 --> 00:07:38,626 >> Xavier: MOTHER! 291 00:07:38,710 --> 00:07:39,668 SURE! HELP YOURSELF! 292 00:07:39,751 --> 00:07:41,043 >> YOU'RE SO KIND. 293 00:07:41,126 --> 00:07:43,543 FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER, I WANT 294 00:07:43,626 --> 00:07:45,335 TO GIVE YOU A HUG, SON. 295 00:07:45,418 --> 00:07:47,751 >> GO ON, GET YOUR HUG. 296 00:07:47,835 --> 00:07:48,835 FREE GRINDER. 297 00:07:48,918 --> 00:07:50,793 >> HEY, DON'T JUST TELL HIM TO 298 00:07:50,876 --> 00:07:51,793 TAKE THE HUG. 299 00:07:51,876 --> 00:07:53,585 TELL HIM TO KICK HER IN THE 300 00:07:53,668 --> 00:07:54,376 FACE, TOO. 301 00:07:54,460 --> 00:07:56,460 >> DON'T JUST TELL HIM TO KICK 302 00:07:56,543 --> 00:07:57,668 HER IN THE FACE! 303 00:07:57,751 --> 00:07:59,460 TELL HIM TO KICK LARRY IN THE 304 00:07:59,543 --> 00:08:00,460 FACE AS WELL! 305 00:08:00,543 --> 00:08:01,918 >> OKAY. I -- WAIT. 306 00:08:02,001 --> 00:08:03,210 WHO'S LARRY? 307 00:08:03,043 --> 00:08:05,376 >> LARRY'S THE FIRST DEMON. 308 00:08:05,460 --> 00:08:06,293 >> REALLY? 309 00:08:06,376 --> 00:08:08,251 I THOUGHT HIS NAME WAS GUS. 310 00:08:08,335 --> 00:08:09,168 >> GUS? 311 00:08:09,251 --> 00:08:10,918 WHAT KIND OF NAME IS GUS? 312 00:08:11,001 --> 00:08:12,960 >> WELL, WHAT'S YOUR NAME? 313 00:08:13,043 --> 00:08:13,626 >> MY NAME IS 314 00:08:13,710 --> 00:08:16,168 GOLDURN B. TAINTNONE -- AS IN 315 00:08:16,251 --> 00:08:18,043 'TAIN'T NONE OF YOUR GOLDURN 316 00:08:18,126 --> 00:08:19,751 BEESWAX! -- THE 3rd. 317 00:08:19,835 --> 00:08:21,376 >> WILL YOU GUYS QUIT DICKERING? 318 00:08:21,460 --> 00:08:22,960 [ Lisping ] LET US FOCUS ON 319 00:08:23,043 --> 00:08:24,001 GETTING THIS GRINDER. 320 00:08:24,085 --> 00:08:25,376 >> HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT, EVERYONE? 321 00:08:25,460 --> 00:08:27,001 I ACTUALLY HAVE A GRINDER HE CAN 322 00:08:27,085 --> 00:08:27,335 HAVE. 323 00:08:27,418 --> 00:08:28,043 HERE. 324 00:08:28,126 --> 00:08:29,668 DON'T SPEND IT ALL IN ONE PLACE. 325 00:08:29,751 --> 00:08:30,376 >> WHA? 326 00:08:30,460 --> 00:08:31,460 [ Lisping ] DON'T BEND IT ALL IN 327 00:08:31,543 --> 00:08:32,126 SOME SPACE. 328 00:08:32,210 --> 00:08:32,751 >> WHA? 329 00:08:32,835 --> 00:08:34,418 DON'T SPIT IN OLIVER'S FACE. 330 00:08:34,501 --> 00:08:35,126 >> WHA? 331 00:08:35,210 --> 00:08:36,918 BONES LEND ITALIANS YOUR WASTE. 332 00:08:37,001 --> 00:08:37,543 >> WHA? 333 00:08:37,626 --> 00:08:39,043 TELEPHONE GAME'S A DISGRACE. 334 00:08:39,126 --> 00:08:39,835 >> WHA? 335 00:08:39,918 --> 00:08:41,918 CHICKA-BA GOOM WAP MACE. 336 00:08:42,001 --> 00:08:42,626 >> WHA? 337 00:08:42,710 --> 00:08:44,751 DON'T SPEND IT ALL IN ONE PLACE. 338 00:08:44,835 --> 00:08:45,460 >> Xavier: WHAT? 339 00:08:45,543 --> 00:08:46,501 HOW DID THAT GET THERE? 340 00:08:46,585 --> 00:08:47,126 HUH. 341 00:08:47,210 --> 00:08:48,460 I'D LOVE TO HUG YOU, MOTHER. 342 00:08:48,543 --> 00:08:50,043 >> [ Whispering ] RIGHT INTO MY 343 00:08:50,126 --> 00:08:51,543 PLAN. 344 00:08:51,626 --> 00:08:54,126 >> ♪ SLIPPYTOWN VILLIAGE CHILI 345 00:08:54,210 --> 00:08:56,043 SLIDE PARK, YEAH ♪ 346 00:08:56,126 --> 00:08:57,376 >> FLUME THROUGH THE 347 00:08:57,460 --> 00:08:59,210 LOOP-DE-LEGUME CON CARNE AND 348 00:08:59,043 --> 00:09:00,376 CHILL IN OUR SCALDING 349 00:09:00,460 --> 00:09:01,876 THREE-ALARM KIDDIE POOL! 350 00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:03,835 >> I BEAN SLIDIN' DOWN THE 351 00:09:03,918 --> 00:09:05,960 BEEF PIPE ALL DAY! 352 00:09:06,043 --> 00:09:08,460 >> YOU'LL JALAPEÑO PANTS. 353 00:09:08,543 --> 00:09:09,751 >> Xavier: I'VE GOT NOTHING TO 354 00:09:09,835 --> 00:09:10,293 ADD TO THAT. 355 00:09:10,376 --> 00:09:11,085 [ WIND WHISTLING ] 356 00:09:11,168 --> 00:09:14,418 [ INSECTS BUZZING ] 357 00:09:14,501 --> 00:09:15,751 THAT DIDN'T WORK. 358 00:09:15,835 --> 00:09:17,918 I'M NOT MOVING UNTIL YOU TELL ME 359 00:09:18,001 --> 00:09:20,376 WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT! 360 00:09:31,168 --> 00:09:32,043 [ CLANKING ] 361 00:09:32,126 --> 00:09:34,168 SIR, DO YOU KNOW HOW TO MAKE ALL 362 00:09:34,251 --> 00:09:36,251 OF THIS STOP? 363 00:09:42,126 --> 00:09:43,251 >> HURRY! TAKE THE GUN! 364 00:09:43,335 --> 00:09:45,126 YOU'VE GOT TO PROTECT THE MAYOR! 365 00:09:45,210 --> 00:09:47,043 [ GUNSHOT ] 366 00:09:50,335 --> 00:09:52,210 >> Xavier: ONLY ONE DOOR LEFT TO 367 00:09:52,293 --> 00:09:53,126 TRY. 368 00:09:53,210 --> 00:09:54,668 ITS ALWAYS THE LAST DOOR HOLDS 369 00:09:54,751 --> 00:09:57,210 THY DEEPEST REWARD. 370 00:09:57,043 --> 00:09:58,751 I DON'T WANT TO PLAY WITH 371 00:09:58,835 --> 00:09:59,876 DOLLIES, MOMMY. 372 00:09:59,960 --> 00:10:01,710 I WANT TO RAMBLE THE WORLD TO 373 00:10:01,793 --> 00:10:02,418 HELP FOLKS. 374 00:10:02,501 --> 00:10:03,251 >> [ CRYING ] 375 00:10:03,335 --> 00:10:05,168 >> Xavier: WHAT'S WRONG, LITTLE 376 00:10:05,251 --> 00:10:05,835 GIRL? 377 00:10:05,918 --> 00:10:07,376 >> I CAN'T GO TO HEAVEN 'CAUSE 378 00:10:07,460 --> 00:10:08,251 I'M GAY. 379 00:10:08,085 --> 00:10:10,043 >> Xavier: I'LL SMUGGLE YOU TO 380 00:10:10,126 --> 00:10:11,626 HEAVEN VIA THE UNDER-BROWN 381 00:10:11,710 --> 00:10:12,376 MALE-ROAD. 382 00:10:12,460 --> 00:10:14,085 ONCE I SHOVE YOU UP THIS 383 00:10:14,168 --> 00:10:16,043 TROJAN ARSE, YOU'LL BE THE FIRST 384 00:10:16,126 --> 00:10:16,876 GAY HOMO IN HEAVEN. 385 00:10:16,960 --> 00:10:17,543 >> UGH! 386 00:10:17,626 --> 00:10:18,543 >> Xavier: THE BLACKY ROBINSON 387 00:10:18,626 --> 00:10:21,126 UNCLE-TOM CRUSOE-MO! 388 00:10:21,210 --> 00:10:22,251 >> YAHOO! YAY! 389 00:10:22,085 --> 00:10:23,043 [ ALARM BLARING ] 390 00:10:23,126 --> 00:10:24,168 >> INTRUDER ALERT! 391 00:10:24,251 --> 00:10:25,960 THERE HAS BEEN A BREACH IN THE 392 00:10:26,043 --> 00:10:26,710 SYSTEM! 393 00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:29,043 HEAVEN WILL SELF-DESTRUCT IN 394 00:10:29,126 --> 00:10:31,335 10 SECONDS IF THE INTRUDER DOES 395 00:10:31,418 --> 00:10:33,335 NOT REVEAL THEMSELVES. 396 00:10:33,418 --> 00:10:35,126 10...9... 397 00:10:35,210 --> 00:10:36,501 >> OKAY, IT'S ME. 398 00:10:36,585 --> 00:10:38,626 >> YOU HAVE SACRIFICED YOURSELF 399 00:10:38,710 --> 00:10:40,418 FOR THE GOOD OF THE WHOLE. 400 00:10:40,501 --> 00:10:42,043 YOU ARE THE NEW MESSIAH. 401 00:10:42,126 --> 00:10:44,418 WHAT WILL BE YOUR FIRST ACT AS 402 00:10:44,501 --> 00:10:45,210 MESSIAH? 403 00:10:45,293 --> 00:10:47,585 >> MY FIRST ACT IS TO DROP THE 404 00:10:47,668 --> 00:10:48,293 ACT! 405 00:10:48,376 --> 00:10:49,793 NOW LET ME GET SOME WHITE WOMEN 406 00:10:49,876 --> 00:10:51,126 FOR THE FIRST BLACK MAN IN 407 00:10:51,210 --> 00:10:51,876 HEAVEN! 408 00:10:51,960 --> 00:10:52,835 >> Xavier: I GIVE UP. 409 00:10:52,918 --> 00:10:54,043 I LAY MY QUEEN DOWN AND 410 00:10:54,126 --> 00:10:55,085 SORE-END HER. 411 00:10:55,168 --> 00:10:55,876 I CONCEDE. 412 00:10:55,960 --> 00:10:57,918 >> TRY OPENING ALL THE DOORS AT 413 00:10:58,001 --> 00:10:58,543 ONCE. 414 00:10:58,626 --> 00:10:59,126 >> Xavier: [ Echoing ] YES. 415 00:10:59,210 --> 00:11:03,668 OVERLOAD THE SYSTEM! 416 00:11:03,751 --> 00:11:04,168 >> WE... 417 00:11:04,251 --> 00:11:04,418 >> ARE... 418 00:11:04,501 --> 00:11:04,960 >> ALL... 419 00:11:05,043 --> 00:11:05,251 >> JUST... 420 00:11:05,335 --> 00:11:05,876 >> PLAY... 421 00:11:05,960 --> 00:11:06,210 >> ERS... 422 00:11:06,293 --> 00:11:06,751 >> IN... 423 00:11:06,835 --> 00:11:07,085 >> THE... 424 00:11:07,168 --> 00:11:07,710 >> GAME... 425 00:11:07,793 --> 00:11:08,043 >> OF... 426 00:11:08,126 --> 00:11:09,210 >> LIFE! 427 00:11:09,043 --> 00:11:10,835 [ THUD ] 428 00:11:10,918 --> 00:11:12,085 >> CONGRATULATIONS. 429 00:11:12,168 --> 00:11:14,085 YOU MAY NOW BEGIN TO PLAY THE 430 00:11:14,168 --> 00:11:15,043 GAME. 431 00:11:15,126 --> 00:11:17,418 >> Xavier: [ Echoing ] OF LIFE. 432 00:11:17,501 --> 00:11:20,543 [ APPLAUSE ]