- Previously on
"The Real Housewives
of New York City"...
- Oh, my God! - Oh, my God.
- Oh, my God! - Yay, Mario!
This is your husband! - This is good.
- It's been really difficult with Scott.
We're officially done and broken up.
- No. - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- "I'm doing the cabaret. I, I, I."
- I'm not narcissistic.
- Everybody's got their sh--. It's enough!
- Luann said you were, like, manic.
And so she was asking if you were on pills or something.
- Miami Beach, here we come.
- What the (BLEEP)?
- Oh, my God! Ha ha!
- This is the best house we've ever been to.
- Luann ----ed my guy.
- And now you're really pissing me off.
- Just say, "I'm sorry."
- Don't tell me what to say.
- I'll say whatever I ----ing want.
- Get off your high horse!
- I will not put up with this. - Leave!
- Go to ----ing sleep now.
- I'm gonna knock you out!
- Do it. Hit me with the--
[banging and clattering]
- Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
- Did something just break down there?
- Sonja. - I'm gonna knock you out.
[slurring] I'm gonna knock you out.
- You're going to bed. Take those shoes off.
- I'm gonna knock you out!
- Take her shoes off. - I am.
- No, I'm gonna knock you out.
- No, it's not okay.
- I'm gonna knock you out.
Don't move. Don't move. Don't move.
- Wallet. I had a Ziploc.
It had more makeup in it.
- She did; I saw it. - I don't think she did.
I didn't see it. Tell me where.
I don't see a mark. - I saw it. In the head.
- What's this right here?
- Tell me where.
- I thought I saw her hit the ledge.
We should call the paramedics.
- Get me some ----ing ice.
You just hear horror stories.
"Oh, someone fell and then died in the middle of the night."
So I want the paramedics here,
because I need to know with 100% absolute certainty
that Sonja is okay.
- I just want to kiss-- - I know.
You could--I know. I know. I know.
I know. This is your big night.
It's a big night. It's a big night.
- Sonja, you okay?
- Ramona, you're crashing my parade.
- I did everything wrong. - You did nothing.
- I did everything wrong. - Your ass is amazing.
- Thank you. I did everything wrong.
- Oh, my God, it's an amazing ass.
Oh, my God.
- Seriously, just lie back or something.
I think you should just lie back.
- I just want to sleep with Bethenny.
- Did something--what happened?
- What the (BLEEP) are you doing, a fashion show?
- No, we're going out. - You're going out!
Okay, bitch. - All right, I'm in.
- You're my lover. - Are we not going out now?
- What should I do? I don't want to leave.
- You should go out. Nothing's gonna be done.
She's wanting to go out with you.
Another night, she might not be ready.
- If you want to. - You know I would tell you.
- I don't want to leave her. - I'll stay.
- She's gonna take care of you.
- All right, we'll be back in an hour.
- How many fingers am I holding up?
Don't lie. Don't make a joke.
Don't make a-- - Three.
- Okay, who's the president?
- Uh, Clinton? - No.
- Um... - Really, who's the president?
- Oh, that ----ing Trump guy.
- Okay, good.
- There's nothing I can do for Sonja.
She's laughing. She's talking.
Nothing is broken.
Sonja's in good hands, so I'm out of here.
[siren blips]
- I'm not-- I'm leaving the bed if--
- Oh, my God, these guys!
- All right, shh. Just relax. Don't get crazy.
- Did somebody fall? - Oh, I fell. I got hurt.
- She tripped and, in my opinion,
just missed the table but hit her foot,
and we just want to make sure she didn't hit her head.
- We could check her vitals. - Okay, great.
That's good. Okay, good.
That's good. That's good. That's good.
- Those guys are hot.
- I know. They are ----ing hot.
They happen to be hot.
- Can you check her too? - It's not appropriate.
- Careful. - Oh, my God.
Look at that sh--. What is right there?
- Is there a party across the way?
- The bed. - Oh, my God.
They're taking Sonja to the hospital?
I had a car accident; I had to go for an MRI.
- That looks really scary. I don't know.
Is this our car? Yeah.
- Pinch!
Owwwwww! Whaa!
- Don't be stressed out. It's all gonna be fine.
- I need to check her heart sounds.
- All right, go. - Take a deep breath, ma'am.
- Barbara came, and she told me
the paramedics were there.
And after everything that she said to me,
I just can't look at Sonja right now.
It was so hurtful, I just can't move.
- Do you take any medications on a daily basis?
- [slurring] No, but I am allergic to dust mites, and--
- Okay, so no medications.
Everything's checking out fine.
Her blood pressure's good. - Okay.
I'm very relieved to hear
that Sonja's pupils don't appear to look like
she's taken anything,
and I want to shove that straight up Luann's ass,
because it's a really horrible accusation,
and it's not a cavalier thing you run around saying.
But do you think someone should check on her
every couple hours for sure, make sure she's awake
every couple hours, for sure?
- Everything's fine. You can let her sleep now.
- Okay. ----ing crazy.
[light music]
- Oh, they have really good drinks here.
- Okay, Ramona. Cheers to you, girl.
- This is their signature drink.
- I don't know if there's any alcohol in it.
- Oh, let's look at the menu.
- Now you want a wine?
- Actually, it's a pinot grigio.
- But now I need a pinot grigio.
- Do you have that?
- I don't mean to sound super annoying,
but I just feel like I got to say this
right now about myself.
- Uh-oh. - No, no, no, no.
For me, Miami was me and Scott.
Miami is just bringing up the good times
with me and Scott.
- Big hugs now!
You get a big hug! Big hugs!
- And it's just bringing up all the fun and excitement
of something I thought was gonna be something forever.
I haven't been to Miami without him.
- Oh, it was like your place?
- Our first long date ever--
- Right, your first five-day date.
- Our fun trip to Colombia.
He sent me those flowers.
- Hello. We've got some flowers.
- No. Oh, my God.
The year before... - Gorgeous flowers.
- He sent me the flowers in Mexico.
For me? - What does it say?
- "Thank you for the best and longest first date ever."
That's so sweet! Oh, my God!
And now I'm here in Miami,
which reminds me of him already,
and we're not together. - I can send you flowers.
You want me to send you flowers?
- Send me some ----ing flowers.
- I'll send you ----ing flowers.
What kind of flowers do you want, bitch?
Tinsley has been obsessed with Scott--like, obsessed.
She needs to get herself out there
and back in the game.
You know what? It's like this.
Look, we have a drink here.
We have a drink here.
Okay, here's a man in your life.
Then you have this in your life.
Then you have this and this.
You can't put all your eggs in one basket
and all your concentration here,
because if something goes wrong here,
you react so bad.
But if you have this going on and this going on
and this and this and this-- look!
You're not so devastated,
'cause you got all this great stuff going on.
- Who's this one?
- I don't know, but it's someone.
- [laughs] He's a hot tamale!
Whoo! I like this one.
- You know, that's what it's all about.
â™ª â™ª
- Can we get coffee?
Why is there nobody here to help?
What is going on?
â™ª â™ª
- Oh, my God, it is late.
I don't stay up that late.
That was a traumatic, traumatic experience.
- What, you don't like staying up
drinking pinot grigio with me?
- I do, 'cause we laughed a lot.
I liked that part.
- You're gonna put the right leg up.
You're gonna grab ahold right underneath the thigh.
- After what happened, I just need time
to be alone and process and ease my way into the day
with the women.
I just--I'm not in a big rush.
- You're sleeping, you two. Come on.
What's going on?
- Looks like a beautiful day.
- I'm going to do yoga quickly. I'll come up after.
Get up. It's too beautiful to sleep.
- I feel great.
- Great? You had the medics here last night.
- I know, 'cause look at this.
What'd they do, take blood samples?
No. - What is that?
- I don't know what that is.
Those Miami Vice houses are not made for, uh...
slipping like a pony
with four legs going out from underneath.
Whoo! But I do know how to fall.
You know, I learned that from horseback riding.
Sonja.
[thud] Oh.
- I'm all right, Kelly. Don't worry.
Jesus.
That scared you guys, I bet. Sorry about that.
- I had a traumatic night last night.
I don't even know how to describe it.
- You missed-- Luann left the dinner
before you even got there.
- She was just screaming at someone for coffee.
- Downward dog.
Hold it there.
Keep breathing through the nose as you do it.
Keep your belly pulled in tight.
- [roaring] Where's the coffeeeeee?
Where are my minions?
Get me my coffee!
- Luann's the Joan Crawford of coffee.
- I need coffee!
- She was ----ing screaming.
She's making a little success look real bad.
- Oh, my God, we look good.
- I think we look good, right?
- Is this a skinny mirror, or...
- We really look this good.
All this working out is working out.
All this working out is working out for our bodies!
[laughs]
- Nobody's down here?
I'm going to make those eggs the way that I make eggs.
I make eggs really good. - All right, you make them.
- What are you doing?
- I'm glammed up for my day.
- Oh, hello. Oh, that's cute.
Oh, I like this bathing suit.
- Comes in black. It's 40 bucks.
- Any bruises? You're not banged up at all?
- Oh, I feel great,
but I do have a bruise here from falling on the table.
And thank you for checking on me to make sure I was alive.
Thank you.
- That coffee is delicious. - Oh, thank you!
[in deep voice] It was not good enough for Luann.
She's like, "No more Skinnygirl coffee ever
in this house!"
- She's definitely in her own world.
- She's in her own world is right.
- Here's the thing I struggle with.
One minute, I feel bad for Luann
and I treat her with this fragility.
And then when I do it,
she makes me feel less of a person,
so then I want to be angry at her.
The girls have told me for years,
"You don't know this Luann. You don't know this Luann."
I maybe ignored this Luann
because my love for her was bigger,
but Luann's a narcissist,
and I don't deal with narcissism well.
- Hey, good morning.
- Hey, how are you?
- I'm pretty good.
- Ramona's out there, talking to Luann.
- Well, enjoy that. - That's not gonna go anywhere.
- Did you do yoga?
- Yeah, it was great.
It was just what I needed.
Last night was pretty awful.
Don't you agree?
- Well, what did you think was awful?
- Maybe the girls getting trashed
and trashing me.
You know, girlfriends are supposed to build you up,
not tear you down.
I think they have a problem with my success,
is the problem.
- Oh, I don't think so.
- I love doing what I do.
I found something I love.
- We love that you love that. - No, you don't.
You try and rip it apart. All of them do.
After falling on my ----ing face,
all they have to do is rip me down.
- Because you usually (BLEEP) my guys.
- Sonja, would you be quiet?
Now you're really pissing me off.
- You sleep with anything.
I would never want you to sleep with anyone I ever dated.
- You take and take, and you just expect,
and you have an entitlement about you.
- I think that they feel that your attitude to the group
is that you have this, like, aloof, condescending--
- You know what they do?
They go to the countess when they have to hide
behind their nonsupport of me doing well.
- I really don't know if we can get through to Luann.
- She's not aware of it, number one,
and B, she doesn't want to acknowledge it,
and C, she doesn't believe it, so...
- Well, she's surrounded by people
who tell her she's God.
- They also don't realize I'm trying to stay sober
and you're getting wasted.
I can be around people that drink;
I can't be around sloppy drunks.
And they don't want to see me do well,
which is really disappointing. - Yes, they do.
Okay, that is so wrong, Luann.
- They don't want to see me doing well.
- Luann, that is completely wrong.
- No. - Luann.
We're all very proud how you turned your life around--
- So then why do they treat me like they do last night?
- I think because--
- Did you see what happened at the table, or are you blind?
- Coming up...
- Why don't you just say to me, "You know what, Sonja?
I think you're a little manic and you're taking pills."
If I went around saying that about you, you'd be in jail!
- I can be around people
that drink;
I can't be around sloppy drunks.
Did you see what happened at the table, or are you blind?
- I guess Sonja had a bone to pick with you,
and she expressed herself.
- Every time I see her, she's drunk.
I can't talk to somebody who's drunk.
Do you understand what I'm saying?
- That, I understand.
- As a friend, I cannot watch her
spiral down into darkness,
'cause that's what's happening to her.
Barbara came into my room.
She told me that she fell flat on her--
I mean, you know how lucky
she didn't hit herself on the table
and kill herself last night?
- You didn't check on Sonja.
- I didn't check on Sonja
because I didn't know what happened to Sonja.
I was in bed.
After Sonja said
some devastating things to me last night,
nobody's checking on me to see how I'm doing.
Does anybody check on me?
"Are you okay, Luann?"
Did I bring a bottle of vodka back to my room?
Which God knows I wanted to.
- Last night was extreme.
May I ask what you drank last night to get--
- Just those rum things.
- No, no, how many?
- Like, five. - Five.
- Five drinks in what kind of glass?
I mean, maybe the 24-ounce tumbler?
- And how much did you eat?
- Not anything. - Nothing.
- That's the problem.
- The welcome drinks always get you.
- "The welcome drinks."
- I'm gonna talk to her.
I'm gonna see if she'll come with me to my AA meeting.
Do you think she'll come? I mean, listen.
I'm not gonna lead a horse to water.
As you know, that's people's choice to do.
- Well, you could say you're going to one.
"Would you like to come?"
"Do you want to join me?" Yeah.
- Okay.
- 'Cause I know she cares about you.
I don't know. Everyone's at a discord here.
I don't know what's going on.
- And I don't want it to be like that.
I needed this trip.
I needed to have some sun and just--
- No, I understand. It'll all work out.
- This is not what I expected.
- It'll work out. It better work out.
- Where's Barbara?
10:30. Where is she? She awake?
- I just feel like she's not down with us.
- Right.
- But no one ripped her or anything?
Nothing happened to her? - No.
- She's experiencing trauma.
It was really mean last night,
Ramona excluding her from going out.
- You want to come? - No.
- What about Barbara?
- Tinsley and I are going to catch up.
Tinsley and Ramona have stuff to catch up on.
- I feel like you're being left out.
- I am.
- So maybe Barbara could be
like a girl who's in one of my daughter's classes
that just feels like she's at the wrong lunch table,
and maybe this just isn't her vibe.
- Sonja, are you okay?
Barbara told me that you fell last night.
- Yeah, I did. - So are you all right?
- Oh, yeah, I'm great. I feel great.
- Did you hit your head? - No.
- I'm worried about you.
It's not normal that you face-plant
at a dinner table.
- Oh, really? - Do you understand?
- You who fall in the bushes?
Oh, oh, oh! - Oh, I like your jumpsuit.
Whoops! - [laughing]
- You fell in the bushes? - [laughing]
- Yes, I do, but at least I own it.
I know that I have an issue with drinking.
- I need to find a place of moderation.
I'm gonna rein it in.
It happens. But I don't need you--
- Do you understand
that I worry about you as my friend?
- No, I don't think you worry about me at all.
- I do worry about you.
- So why did you complain to the girls?
Why didn't you just say to me, "You know what, Sonja?
I think you're a little manic and you're taking pills."
I don't need you saying that to people.
If I went around saying that about you, you'd be in jail.
- I've been trying to talk-- - No, no.
- I tried to talk to you at Dorinda's party.
- Yeah, well, you got to keep it tighter, Lu.
You got to keep it between us.
You can't be going around throwing that sh-- out there.
- We were supposed to talk this morning, okay?
- You don't need to talk to me.
All you have to do is touch me like this
and look at me, Lu; I read your mind.
- So I'm touching you now and looking at you like this.
- Okay, fine. - I'm worried about you.
- And I heard you. - Okay.
- And I got it, okay? - All right.
Look, I'm not the drinking police.
I love Sonja.
I've fallen into the bush.
I didn't remember things.
I don't want the same thing happening to her.
I'm gonna go to a meeting.
I--you know, I would love for you to come with me.
It's not about you going to a meeting;
it's about you being--
- I've gone with friends to meetings, yeah.
- Will you come with me?
- They're great. - Will you come?
- I--I'm going to see how I feel.
I don't want to go to AA with Luann on vacation,
because I don't think I have a drinking problem,
because I've looked at all the rules,
I go to doctors,
and I check off all the boxes, and I'm fine.
- Good morning, ladies. - How's it going?
- Hey. - How are you?
- Good. I did yoga. It was great.
- We're two different point of views, but we're good.
- Well, that's good. That's okay.
- Everybody has their point of view.
- Let's everybody just try
and treat each other with respect.
- Can we have a good time?
- Bathing suit time? - Yup. Oh, I'm ready.
- You guys go to the pool.
I'm gonna go to a meeting, 'cause it's gonna help me
just to stay good today.
Oh, look at her.
- We were trying to find you.
- I went for a run into Miami.
- Did you survive last night?
I heard it was tough.
- That was a tough night.
- You haven't seen nothing yet.
- [laughs] - Oh, thanks.
- I'm gonna go to a meeting.
I'm gonna join you girls at lunch.
- Good morning.
If I upset you last night, I'm sorry.
- No.
- But we're all strong personalities, so it's--
we're not easy to handle.
That's for sure.
- And we have opinions.
- Are you kidding? Absolutely.
- And feelings. - And alcohol.
- Yeah.
We're gonna all hang out at the pool.
You want to hang out by the pool with us?
- Yeah. - Okay, good.
â™ª â™ª
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh!
- Oh, boy, what a picture.
So pretty.
- I think that's a very elegant bathing suit.
That's very bain de soleil.
- Yeah, I like this. It's that new--
It's that company I found online.
Ooh, shoot, I didn't take the plastic bit out.
- I know. - That's very elegant.
- [laughs]
[lively music]
- Girls. - We're in paradise!
- Everyone looks so good.
- It's like we have our own exclusive resort here.
- It's really nice. - Right?
- It's easy.
It feels like we're far away, not just in Florida.
- So how many people are going to come today?
A lot. - I don't know.
- About 50?
- You can have 30 total.
- The party Nazi.
- I just get nervous there's not enough food.
- Well, then uninvite some of your people.
- If I had to, I will. - Uninvite some of your people.
And that way, you can get un-nervous.
Just uninvite them.
Give me their numbers. I'll do it for you.
- Ramona has been thinking about this party
for a couple weeks.
She's controlling how many people
we're allowed to invite to dinner,
and then you're allowed to invite this many later.
We can only have penises, no vaginas.
Like, there's a whole ----ing rule with Ramona.
- I'm gonna go in the pool.
The water is really, really nice.
- That's actually
a nice picture with your head down.
- Thank you, Dorinda.
- Just put your arms out like this.
Very casual.
There. There you go.
Now Ramona's in the noodle.
- Ramona, get your ----ing noodle out of my picture.
- It's like a cargo ship going by.
- [laughs] - You're ruining her photo.
- [imitates ship horn blowing]
- Literally the USS Ramona.
- The USS Ramona with two life rafts going by.
Coming up...
- If you don't appreciate and respect yourself
a little more--
- I lost a lot of confidence.
- I know, but over someone that couldn't handle
how special and awesome you are.
[upbeat music]
- Hi. - Can I get you anything?
- Uh, no, I'm good. How you doing today?
- I'm good. How are you?
- Yeah? [chuckles] Great.
- So I didn't tell you this.
- Uh-oh. - No, it's not an uh-oh.
So it just shows you how things can change.
Mario met me last week in the city with the girls,
so I told him we're down here.
And he said, "Well, I'll come visit."
So he's gonna come tonight.
- Oh, my God. - Yeah.
- That's over the top. - Is it?
I mean, it's a nice thing.
- That's a beautiful thing.
Does he ever say, "I just regret it happened"?
- No, he said he's very sorry.
- Hi. - Hey, Lu, how are you?
- It was good.
- I said to Bethenny
Mario's gonna come today to the party.
- Could you be friends with benefits?
- I can't do that.
- That's not Ramona's style.
- You know, it's hard to put your old slippers back on.
He would never bring a girl here, obviously.
- No.
But I also invited a man that I like,
that I've been out with a few times.
- So is that a double standard?
- I don't know. What does that mean?
- Well, Mario's not bringing somebody that he might like,
but you have a flirt going on at the same time?
- I'm allowed.
- I don't even understand.
Like, you're gonna make some guy you don't know jealous
with a man that you used to be married to?
But she thinks this is her having game,
this is a good idea.
- Guys, we have to get to Wynwood.
- I have to bust out of here at 3:15.
- Yeah, perfect. Let's go.
- Thank God
the ladies agreed to leave this house for one day
and take in a little culture in Miami.
Okay, let's go.
- You look like a fiesta, 'cause you're tasseled up.
- So we're gonna go see Wynwood Walls,
which is an artist enclave
filled with fabulous studios and murals
and artists from all over the world.
Awesome. I'm so glad we're doing this.
- I know. Me too.
- You've never been to Wynwood?
- No. - It's great.
- I kind of want to, like, not go crazy tonight.
- Just enjoy the party. - Yeah.
- Are there some guys coming?
- Yes, and I'm gonna--
my goal is to facilitate you meeting them.
This is my goal. - Okay, thank you. Maybe.
- And we're just gonna have fun.
Let's just enjoy ourselves.
- I know, but there's gonna be a lot of men there, so--
- Good, good, good. Yeah.
My sister's gonna be there too.
- Daphne?
- Dabney, yeah.
- Gab--Dabney.
- I think we're here now. Wynwood Walls?
- This place--there used to be nothing here.
Look at the artists who are painting.
You see the-- - This is amazing.
- Isn't it cool?
- So I'm actually hopping out to go to the 1 Hotel
to visit some friends of mine.
- When? Now?
- Yeah, about five minutes.
- You're just gonna blow this off.
- I just need to chill out, cause Mario's coming.
I just need to--
- The 1 is the other way, though, by the way.
- As much as I love hanging out with all these ladies,
they're gonna be walking around for two hours solid,
and we're having a big party tonight,
and then I have a date and Mario coming.
So I got to figure out how I'm gonna deal with that,
how I'm gonna play both men.
- Ramona's gonna go see some friends at the 1.
- How many guys can one woman handle?
- Sonja, if you want to come, come, 'cause I'm leaving now.
- I'm gonna do the cultural event.
- Only Ramona.
And she doesn't even get out to look at this.
- But why did she come at all?
Where is she going?
- She's got to run to pick up more guys.
- She's running a volume business.
- Spend time with us.
See ya!
I'm like...
I mean, there's barely a good-bye.
- So let's go and see Peter.
Bethenny. - We're going in.
- Peter's in here. - This is Peter Tunney?
Oh, this is a great store. - Yeah.
Peter! - This is so fun.
- Oh, my God. - Hey.
Wow, this looks incredible
since the last time I was here.
- You like what I've done with the place?
- Oh, my God.
Well, you know I love chandeliers.
- How are ya?
- I've known Peter Tunney for years.
He's a New York-based artist
who's now moved to Florida,
and he's basically blown up Wynwood Walls.
So it's gonna be fun.
So this looks great.
- I love all this.
- How ironic. "Don't stop ever."
It's a stop sign. I'm freaking out.
- I saw that.
- That is a piece that adorned the stairwell
when I lived in the nightclub the Crobar for one year.
- I used to go to the Crobar.
- I remember that. I remember that.
- I have to have it, so what's that gonna be?
Hit me.
- That's a one-of-a-kind original piece
from my private collection.
You can have that for ten with the frame too, delivered.
- Okay, done. - Delivered.
Tins, I'm gonna show you something.
This is called "Warhol Soup."
In the context of you,
the chicest little clutch ever.
- [laughs] - That's so true.
- I'm giving it to you. - Oh, that's amazing.
- Carry it with you for Art Basel.
Put your gear in there.
- Shut up! Thank you!
- That's so cute. - Thank you!
- You're lucky! - I'll put my phone in it.
I mean, I guess I still got it.
This is yours.
- Aw, that's-- - Tempus Fugit record.
- We're all getting presents!
- This is yours. You ready?
- Yeah.
- You get the Barbra Streisand
"A Star is Born" double Tempus Fugit.
- Barbra! - This is for you.
- Me? - Yeah.
- Perfect. - Thank you!
- You forgot me. - What?
- You forgot me. - No, I didn't.
- [laughs]
I'm like, "Everybody gets a present but me."
- I love my thing.
- I didn't forget you, Luann.
- Cool. Thank you, babe.
- You're welcome. - Awesome.
- Thank you for bringing us here.
- Do you know that he sold that--
- For $6,000. - Six grand.
- This is five.
- Is that really $5,000? - 5,000 bucks.
- Yes. - Wow.
- She's the it girl, Tinsley.
She got a $5,000 gift. - You got to love it.
I pay $10,000. She gets $5,000.
Something's wrong with this picture, right?
And you didn't get a present. - You know what?
I have a daughter; that's my present.
She doesn't.
Now, this is all about love, which we all need.
Hi. We're here.
How are you? - Oh, my God.
- Good to see you. - Good to see you.
- Nice to see you. You know my friends.
Romero Britto
is the same as his art.
He's joy and love and fun.
And it's just happy.
- This--I love this one.
Luann, this reminds me of you.
- What, that one? Oh, thank you.
- That's a compliment.
- This is cool.
- Bethenny has a gift for all of you here.
- We have a gift. - What?
- We get gifts, ladies.
- Here we go, the hearts. - I love it.
- Thank you. I love you.
I'm so glad I brought them here.
I told Romero that I wanted
to give the girls a gift.
- Thank you. - Are you freaking out?
I thought it would just be something special.
It will remind everyone
of this experience and this trip.
- Oh! - This matches your dress.
- I feel like we're not disgusting, vile,
vapid, alcoholic arguers
when we do things like this.
- There was somebody missing here.
Who is missing here?
Did anybody get lost?
- Oh, Ramona. - She get lost?
- She doesn't get a gift... - No way.
- Because she didn't come.
We picked the bigger, better deal.
- I can't believe Ramona's not here.
[clicks tongue]
Knucklehead!
- Ramona was a jackass not to come.
- To come to go to another bar and another pool
and not get two pieces of signed art.
- I mean, I racked it up.
- Yeah. - Thank you.
- Coming up...
- Oh, Ramona has a date coming today.
She told him you were going to be here, though,
so there's not going to be no funny stuff.
[upbeat music]
â™ª â™ª
- Oh, my God, this is gonna be such a fun night.
I can't wait.
I feel like I'm going to my prom
or something tonight.
I don't know why I'm saying that,
but I do feel like that.
- Don't get pregnant.
- That ship's sailed.
I love entertaining. Everyone knows that.
And I know this is gonna be a great party.
I planned the menu with the chef.
I invited a lot of the people.
I'm psyched.
So, Sonja, you haven't met Kevin, right?
He's ta--he's 6'4",
really nice-looking... - Okay.
- And he's not too loud, which I like.
He's very elegant, classy.
He has this rum called Blackwell,
so I told him to come, told him to bring his rum.
He's smart. He's been married before.
He has an older daughter.
- Wow, you really like this one.
You know his name. You know about his family.
- I said, "Oh, Kevin, by the way,
"I just want you to know
that my ex-husband will be here tonight."
- Why did you do that?
- He goes, "Don't worry. I'll be nice to him."
I invited Kevin
'cause I wanted, like, a buffer,
because I didn't want Mario to feel like
I had to be with him all the time.
If I had, like, a semi-date
or whatever you want to call it,
it'd be just--I don't know--
different.
- Let's make a deal.
We have the best time at the party,
but that you do not keep me awake late at night.
- Okay. [laughs]
- Barbara? - Hi.
Ooh!
- Look at you! - Wow.
Look at that. That's a hot dress.
- Thank you. - Very nice.
- You said five guys were coming, so--
- Ah!
- So we have rosÃ©.
- Whispering Angel. - Right, right, right.
- Pinot grigio. - Okay.
- [indistinct] - Perfect.
Right. Okay, good.
Hey, Mario. Hey, how are you?
- Hi. - Hey.
- Hi, Ramona. - Hey, Mario.
- How are you?
- These are the bartenders of the night.
We're just discussing things.
- Nice to see you. - You too.
- You look lovely.
- I do? Well, thank you.
- Vision in white. - Thank you.
You look nice. A little touch of yellow here.
- Okay. [laughs] - Okay.
I always like this button buttoned up,
but you don't have to do that.
I can't help it.
Mario and I have always had chemistry,
and we always will.
- Wow! [laughing]
- Would you like some champagne, darling?
- Gee, what do you have in mind?
[laughing]
- Oh, my gosh. [gasps]
When you laugh, look at these pecs!
- Squeeze a little in there.
Oh, yeah. Oh, ah.
- Thank you, honey, for listening to me.
- I'll send you my bill for your...
- My session. - Therapy session.
- This is why I was married to him for over 20 years.
[upbeat music]
Michael! Hey, Jacqueline.
How are you? Welcome.
- Great seeing you. - You too.
- Hey, Michael. - So I love tons of ice.
So I'd like more ice, please.
This is what I want to have all night
until the rum comes.
- Since when do you drink rum?
- Um, do you think we should dim the lights a little?
Is it a little too bright?
So that's good.
- You look beautiful!
- Hello. - Speaking of...
- Welcome, girls.
[people talking at once]
- Hey, darling. - Hi.
Michael! - You look lovely.
- How you doing? Nice to see you.
- You look great. - Hi, Calvin.
- Lovely. - I know Michael from New York.
Lois, we were friends, like, way before Mario.
- Way before me?
Was there anything way before me?
- You know what, Mario? There was nothing before you.
- All right, I'll have another club soda, please.
Lots of soda and a little pinot.
Just a splash.
Tonight I'm definitely gonna watch how much I drink,
because after last night,
I don't want to go overboard again.
I mean, it's just, like, ridiculous.
- Have you ever seen Ramona flirt?
- What's the matter?
- It's going up my butt.
- What's going up your butt?
- The slip. - The dress?
- The slip. - Is that sexy?
I don't remember reading where that was sexy.
- I need to pull it down.
I just have to make sure it stays down.
- I think I missed a whole chapter
in "Sexiness for Women."
- I can see the whole hole.
- Drinks are at the bar.
- Thank you.
- I'm Ramona. Hi.
Pardon? - Denio.
- Denio? - Denio.
And your first name again is? - Max.
- So you live here full-time?
- So what's going on since I saw you last?
- She's so much fun these days.
I've been having a good time with Ramona.
- Oh, so what months are you in New York?
- Uh, May through September.
- Oh, the best months.
- Well, she could let the guys relax
and ease into the party a little bit.
I don't know if Ramona's having Mario there
to play with him like a cat with a ball of yarn,
but I'm just gonna sit back and watch,
'cause I do enjoy watching Ramona in action.
You're looking very snazzy.
I like your sneakers, your skinny jeans.
What do you think, Ramona?
- Mario always looked good.
- Oh, Ramona has a date coming today.
She told him you were gonna be here, though,
so there's not gonna be no funny stuff.
- Coming up...
- This is the expensive one.
- Eel. - Eel.
I don't like eel. You like eel?
- Mm-hmm. - Wow.
That went down very fast.
- Oh, Ramona has a date
coming today.
- Oh, yeah? Who's the guy?
- Oh, he's very cute. - Oh, I bet.
- But he knows you're here.
- Sonja, what are you doing?
- I told him. - It's not even really a date.
- Well, he knows about Mario.
This way, nobody will be awkward.
- Maybe a little part of me,
a little part of me, wanted to make him jealous.
- Are you gonna point him out to me when he comes in?
- Oh, yeah, I'll tell you right away.
- I bet you will. [laughs]
- And it feels good that he looks jealous.
[laughing]
- Hey, there she is.
- You look scrumptious.
- How you doing?
[people talking]
- Dab! You look amazing!
Hi! - How are you?
- So good to see you!
Regardless of the fact that these women
are filling the house with, like,
half the bachelors in Miami,
I'm just really excited to see my sister tonight.
- You have lashes in common, the two of you.
- Lashes. - Yes, we were born with them.
Totally. Totally born with them.
- All I know about Ramona and Mario
is how she said every year they go to Pussy-tano,
not Positano.
- She said "Pussy-tano"? - Yes.
- It is so humid out. - It is.
You want to have a cocktail with us?
- I'm gonna have a cocktail with you.
I'm going to have a Diet Coke cocktail
for the moment.
For the moment. I'm gonna start slow.
- I forgot about that. - I still have a good time.
- I haven't seen you in a couple of years.
- I know. I've been busy
getting married, divorced...
Denio is just a really good friend, good flirt.
My plan is not to have
a repeat of last night
and have some fun at this party
and hang out with my friends.
- Looking hot, Lu!
- Let's sit down.
Luann likes someone. - I know.
She's ready for this, I'll tell you.
She's ready for some.
- She seems very happy and comfortable.
- And just so you know,
Sonja, she makes up all this sh-- all the time.
- Well, that was pretty interesting.
I can't wait to meet the guy.
- No, she-- - Are you the guy?
Are you the guy? Wait a minute.
Are you the guy? You must be the guy.
- Oh, my God.
- Have a sign: "I'm the guy."
- "I'm the guy." You're the guy.
[laughs]
- Whatever.
- So let's see.
This is the expensive one.
- Eel. - Eel.
- I don't like eel. You like eel?
- Mm-hmm. - Wow.
That's a lot of eel.
Wow.
That went down very fast.
- I didn't want it on my dress.
- That was like a fish
going after a big, long worm on a hook.
I always said Sonja's a professional.
- How are you? Nice to see you, Sonja.
- I just deep-throated sushi. - Oh, goodness.
- She did. I have your boots.
- Do you? - These Guccis.
- When I bought them, I was like,
"I can only wear them in Miami."
- They're amazing.
- So did you come from Palm Beach?
- From Palm Beach, yeah. Not that far.
- And what do you do in Palm Beach?
- Oh, I just-- at the moment, not working.
- How nice.
â™ª â™ª
- Oh, let's take a picture.
- I'm sucking in my stomach.
That's for damn sure.
Got it? - Yeah.
- Ramona, this is my good friend Loury.
- She's beautiful.
- Hi, how are you? Good to see you.
- You're not lovers; you're friends.
- No, we're friends. - I don't know.
I don't know this stuff.
- She's married. She has two kids.
- Oh, and you're fluid, but not for this one.
Okay. - Yeah.
- Hey!
Sonja, this is Kevin.
- But you're just friends. - Hi, Kevin.
- Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you.
She's so little next to you.
- Not that little.
- You're tiny.
- You think I'm tiny? - I--no.
You're bigger than life. How's that?
- Aw!
- Hey. - How are you?
Good to see you. How's it going?
- Good. I play tennis, took up golf.
- Really? You living the good life?
- Do a little paddle surfing.
- You guys are, like, all friends
and, like, consciously uncoupled now?
- See, it can happen. Something to shoot for.
- This Mario-Ramona dynamic is so modern.
I am jealous.
I love it for Avery.
I love it for them.
I just--I love it.
- Let's just sit here.
- Show me the house. Show me the outside.
- Oh, my God, Ramona is out there with a guy.
- Oh, let's go spy.
I spy. I spy.
- I want to see that too, actually.
- Is your ex-husband actually here?
- Yeah. - Which one is he?
I mean, I don't want to--
- Oh, I thought you met him.
I don't know.
The gentleman in the yellow shirt.
- You guys have been split up for a while.
- Four years.
He had a midlife crisis.
- Look, she's flirting. It's cute.
- So cute, so fun. Just, like, ugh.
- What's wrong? Why are you "ugh"?
- The place became, like, Scott.
- Don't go there. - I am.
- Tins, come on.
But you're doing well.
- For some reason, like,
being in Miami makes me really sad.
- Tinsley, he didn't make you that happy.
He was a burden.
He was a weight on your shoulders.
And, Tinsley, if you don't appreciate and respect yourself
a little more--
- I lost a lot of confidence.
- I know, but over someone that couldn't handle
how special and awesome you are.
The Mercer girls are a lot to handle.
- I know. We're so ----ing crazy.
- No, we're just real, and we're honest,
and that's okay.
- Dabney and I are two years apart,
and even though she's my little sister,
she will give me a lot of tough love,
and she wants the best for me, and so I know
that what she's saying is from her heart.
- [laughs]
- And she really is way wiser than I am,
so I do listen to her.
- This house is awesome,
so why don't you invite some dudes over tomorrow
and meet your next victim?
[both laugh]
- They are victims, right?
- Always.
- Coming up...
I missed getting art!
- Britto gave us $20,000 pieces
and signed them for us.
- I'm so upset.
- Who's this one?
He's new.
- Tony Kennedy.
- Of course, Luann's ready to zoom right in on that one.
- You want me to sit over there?
- Yes, I think you should.
- Oh, my God.
God, Lu. - What?
- I've been working this, massaging this for an hour.
- She cabaret-ed him. - And you're still over there?
How did that happen? - The Eagle has landed.
- What is your name? - Tony.
- Hi. - What's going on?
What are you doing?
- We were just putting on some makeup.
- There's a guy here, so come downstairs.
He's a good-looking guy. He's successful.
He lives here. Just come downstairs.
Take a ----ing shot. He's good-looking, for real.
- So cute. I mean, perfect timing.
- Let's go.
- I was just crying, but okay, great.
- Tinsley just wants to really meet someone.
She wants to meet a successful, good-looking, wealthy guy,
and I know one.
You know Tinsley?
- Hi, Tinsley. - Hi. Tinsley.
Nice to see you. Hi, hi.
- I was set up on a date with Brett,
and I liked him.
He was very, very nice. He's fun.
And even if it's a temporary distraction
from Scott, that would be a win.
- I don't know. Now I feel awkward.
- Honey, just relax. It's gonna take a little while.
- Polka Dot is single and cute and fun.
You never know, so the store's open.
So just hang out.
He's into it. He's into it.
- You're so cute. You're like a little girl.
- I am a loser.
Okay, I'm gonna go. I'm gonna--okay.
- All right, come with me.
- I'm gonna--we're gonna go get a drink.
- Could you have botched that more?
The good thing is, you look cute.
- What has happened to me? I have...
- You didn't know you were being set up.
- Way more game than that.
- Well, let's see it. - Ugh!
I can't sit there and chat and be like,
"Hey, and what do you do?
Oh, oh."
- "Where are you from?"
Is that what a girl looks like who's trying to be sexy?
- "Oh." I can't do that.
I can't do that right now.
- Hi, everyone.
Food is ready. We have three entrees.
Some kind of bass, chicken, and filet mignon.
â™ª â™ª
- Hi, everybody. - Hello.
Hi, hi, hi, I'm so sorry to interrupt you,
but it's time-sensitive,
and we have to corral the troops
for Dorinda to make a toast.
- So Dorinda's doing the toast?
- Yeah, so I'm trying to let everyone know to get near here.
For some reason, Ramona takes some joy
in acting like this is her actual house
and this is her actual party,
so we are messing around with Ramona.
I'm the coach, and you're the quarterback.
The second everyone's ass hits that chair,
you're up or I'm going up.
- She's gonna freak out.
- One of Ramona's tits will pop out.
- Okay, everyone! Everyone?
- Oh, oh! - Yes, I'm gonna make a toast!
- [laughs] - Wait, don't eat.
She's making a toast. - Oh, she's making a toast.
- So we want to thank everybody for coming tonight.
It is a beautiful house. - Gorgeous house.
- We're so... - Stunning.
- Happy to be here.
I also want to thank Luann
for bringing us to Peter Tunney's today.
He was literally taking art off the wall
and giving it to us.
- It was so nice.
- Followed by Romero Bretto...
- Romero Britto.
- Taking-- she literally arranged
to have sculptures made for us.
These hundreds of thousands
of dollars' worth of art was handing to us.
- So I missed getting a piece of art?
- Two. - Two.
- I missed getting a piece of art?
- Romero Britto gave us $20,000 pieces...
- Crazy. - And signed them for us.
- He said, "What do you want?" - I'm so upset.
- He's saying, "Take this, and let me sign it for you."
- He did it for all of us.
- And we're sitting with this amazing, famous artist
who's working with the Pope,
who's worked with presidents--
- With the Queen Mother!
- Queen Mother. - Barbara Bush, rest in peace.
- The Lord Jesus Christ. [laughs]
If you're going to play Bigger, Better Deal,
you're going to miss out on some special treasures.
You flooze, you lose.
- I need to chill out.
I was, like, trying to organize all this--
- Organize this?
You were at the hotel with guys.
- I was relaxing. - With guys.
- Well, I hope it was worth all that.
You know, we got some amazing art.
- Well, whatever.
I'm surprised that they didn't bring me
a piece of art back.
Hey, when I was at the clam bake
and Dorinda wasn't there,
I brought her back lobsters.
- She stays for half an hour,
and then she tries to take a lobster with her.
- Where's Mario? He leave?
- No, I think I just see him flying over here.
- Hi. - Hi, Ramona.
How are you?
- Mario, this is Kevin. Kevin, this is Mario.
- Hi, Kevin.
- You know, Mario and I are in a good place,
but, you know, maybe I want to give him
a little taste of his medicine.
- So I got a call from Avery.
- Yeah, how's Avery? - She's good.
- I was going to see if there's a coffee.
- You know, they keep slipping. - Coffee? Go ahead.
- You know what? I don't know--
- No, the waiters
keep slipping. - Wow.
Wow.
- I feel sorry for Mario.
He seems awkward.
I don't know if he's jealous or horrified.
- So she said something about dinner on Monday.
- Yeah, yeah, Chefs Club.
- You going to Chefs Club?
- Yeah. - We're going to Chefs Club.
- Ramona, on a roll over here,
made out with Harry.
- Shut up! - Harry?
- Yeah. - He's on your wife's lips.
- Harry's back in the picture?
- Can you shut your ----ing mouth?
I don't know where she's coming up with all this--
- I'm actually having a good time now.
- It's true. - Well...
- The voice of reason. It's true.
- You're not married. Why's it matter?
- Are you jealous?
- No! I don't want Harry.
But he does love me.
- What is Sonja thinking?
Or should I say she's not thinking,
that dumb blonde?
- Seriously? - Poor Sonja.
Everyone cross-pollinates. Everyone cross-pollinates.
They cross-pollinate with Tom.
Now we're cross-pollinating with Harry.
- Is that what it's called, cross-pollinating?
- Should we cross-pollinate? - No, nobody, no.
- Boy, you said that very quickly, Mario.
- I don't do-- - I'm very insulted.
- No, no, not just you. Not just you.
- Wow, Mario. I'm not a loser.
Next time on "The Real Housewives
of New York City"...
- You never sticks up for her. She's--
- I never what? - You never stood up for her.
- Oh, oh, really? - Wow.
Who the (BLEEP) do you think you are?
You're insufferable!
- I'm somebody who likes to be on stage.
That's for sure.
So if you want to call me a diva, then I'm a diva.
- You're being self-absorbed, Luann.
- I feel very alone,
and I feel, like, really overwhelmed.
- Anybody want to go for a swim at the beach?
- You never change!
- You're judging me.
- I'm not judging you, Sonja.
I'm trying to open your eyes.
- 'Cause you've dimed out on your sobriety.
- I'm not diming out on my sobriety.
- Yes, you are. - How dare you?
- Cabaret, cabaret, cabaret all day.
Life is not a cabaret.
- Are we bullies now, control freak bullies?
- That's ----ing rude. - You're a sicko!
I didn't even ask... [crying and babbling]
- You're gonna have a heart attack.
- For more on the Real Housewives,
go to bravotv.com.