- Previously
on "The Real Housewives of New York City"...
- Jenna kindly gave everyone gifts of lingerie.
- You couldn't stand the gift that she gave you.
- Oh, my God. - "I hate it."
- I would be pissed.
- Did Jessel say anything about me?
- She said, "I just got carried away,
and I felt like the cackling hags were ganging up on me."
[laughter] - "Cackling hags"?
- I've never had, like, a real family.
- It didn't feel like a real family?
- Yeah, no.
I'm not close with most any of my relatives.
It's painful. It's hard.
- So I was thinking,
why don't we do a Friendsgiving at my house?
- Stop it!
- Jenna's here!
- Oh, wait. Hang on. I have to help--
- Hi. Welcome.
Happy Friendsgiving. - Oh, oh. Hi.
- We're all thankful.
- I get why it's so difficult for you,
and I feel like Thanksgiving is probably the hardest.
- Yeah, it's, like, family and coming together
and everything, and it's just, like, not an awesome situation.
[voice breaking] There was, like, abuse and neglect,
and, like, I wasn't picked up for, like, six days,
or my diaper wasn't changed. - I know.
- Like... [sniffles]
[soft dramatic music]
* *
My grandma, my mom's mom came in, and she adopted us.
[sniffles] And I was scared I was gonna get taken away.
You know, and I just remember for three years, I was scared.
I was scared out of my mind.
It was ----ed up.
- So at what point did things start looking better?
- Or did they?
- I was so upset that I actually, like--
I was a first grader, and I, like,
drank a bottle of Dimetapp
'cause I wanted to sleep forever.
[somber music]
- I'm sorry, Brynn.
* *
It's heartbreaking.
I saw, like, her little girl
remembering not being cared for.
Like, she's such a beautiful, vivacious, funny,
warm, smart girl, and to think
of that living in her head just feels awful.
It was really-- like, it upset me a lot
- If I'm cute enough and funny enough
and smart enough and clever enough
and I don't complain, then they'll let me stay
where I want to.
- It's so heart-wrenching.
She went through a level of trauma
that I don't think anyone in this room can understand.
So I get why she doesn't want to talk about it.
So, when she does,
I feel like we should all rally and be with her.
- And my dad ----ed off, revoked all rights as a father.
He went from, like,
living in, like, the ghetto, ----ed-up sh--,
prison, everything and then just, like--
- Did he ever try and find you? - Yeah.
I was a senior in high school, and I get a call.
My father, who I think
maybe talked to twice in my life, he was dying.
He was in the ICU.
Developed cirrhosis of the liver, liver cancer,
and we had a lovely relationship.
Like, I went up every weekend.
- Did he apologize for being absent?
- [crying] He did, and he said there was never a day
in his life that he didn't look in the mirror
and look at a monster.
You know, and I forgave him.
Because what the (BLEEP) do you do? You forgive him.
Which is why I don't like Thanksgiving that much.
November 12th he died.
[sniffles]
- I think that you turned out pretty ----ing great.
- And you really are pretty spectacular,
warm, and beautiful.
Like, really impressive woman. - Thank you.
- You should be very proud of yourself.
- There are so many people that would let that fail them,
and you didn't.
- But you choose. - You overcame, baby.
- Exactly. - Yeah.
- Brynn's experiences and how she grew up
definitely shape who she is.
I didn't know all of this about Brynn.
I love that she trusts us as her friends,
and it feels like a safe space for her to share with us.
- And I want to make a toast to you.
all: Cheers.
- To built-in family. We love you.
- Thank you so much, Sai. - Thank you, Sai.
- To my food-stamp bitch.
- To getting stuffed in November.
- Thank you. - Oh, yeah.
- People ask, how am I so happy?
And I generally am.
[laughing] And I'm not even on anything anymore.
I'm so happy, because, like, I've felt so much pain.
That's why I'm just ----ing happy all the time,
'cause I know both sides.
You choose happiness,
and it's so much better to just be happy.
Literally, I was, like, crying half the day today.
Like, I feel so much better, you guys.
I feel good. - Lighter.
Lighter. - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- I think a lot of people feel sad around the holidays.
- Yeah. - For sure.
- Not me. - Not this bitch.
- No family, the city's empty, everything is 50% off.
[laughter] This is great.
- Um, oh, wait, guys.
I don't know if anyone is free next Thursday.
- No. - [laughing] But I'm hosting--
"No, no, no."
- I am! - Oh, good.
I am hosting a little event, like, a little cocktail
for a designer that I represent.
- Okay. - It's at my place,
very casual, dip in, dip out, say hi.
But, yeah, and the proceeds are going towards, like,
this beautiful charity that helps build schools in India.
- Oh, that's great. - Like, it's a very cool event.
- I know. I think I have something that night,
so I may not be able to, but I--
- What do you have?
- I don't actually remember, but all I know is--
[laughter] No, I actually know--
- You just have something that you'd rather be doing?
- Well, no, because I just-- - I guess so.
- I'm definitely gonna come, but I might be late.
- Yeah. No pressure at all. - But I'll come.
- So... - Very fun.
- I hope you guys can make it.
- This is so dang incredible. - This is delicious.
I'm so excited. - I'm so happy.
- It's taking me back straight to my homeland.
- What kind of fish is this?
- It's branzino. - Branzino.
- Oh, my God. - It's insane.
- My main concern was to feed everyone
to make sure they didn't talk sh-- about me and my house.
- Lucky you. - Like, you think we would
come over and just talk sh-- about you and your house?
- I had nice toilet paper.
- You're obsessed with toilet paper.
- Sorry, I'm still gonna talk sh-- about you.
- You're, like, so obsessed with toilet paper.
- Obsessed.
Erin, what kind
of toilet paper is this that you have in here?
- [laughing] You have your own pack.
- Is this recycled? - It won't break down.
- Oh, my God!
At least better than being cackling hags in the Hamptons.
- Cack, cack, cack, cack, cack!
- That was mean. - What do you mean?
- It was a joke! We're not allowed to joke?
- That's not funny.
- A little bit?
- You think that's funny?
- I mean, in England, it's like a...
it's a funny colloquial...
- Did you tell her that you called her that?
- [stammers] What do you mean?
- I mean--do you know that we were the Hampton cackling hags?
- You and I?
- I said you guys were a bunch of cackling hags.
- Hags. Hags!
- It's a British term, you guys.
Brits are crude.
We say "bollocks," "bugger," "shag," "twat."
"Cackling hags" is like saying "hi" or "cheerio."
But also, Erin's, like, a cat.
She's waiting to pounce on everything I say.
- Wait, what do you mean? What is cackling hag?
- It's like what we're doing right now.
It's loud and, like, cackling. It's, like, a British thing.
- I don't like that. I don't think it's nice.
- Oh, my God. I think it's an endearment.
I just say somebody's a cackling hag.
I don't think it's mean. - No, it's not, Jenna.
- I don't think it's mean. - You're being kind.
- If she called me a cackling hag, I would be totally fine.
- Jenna, you're a cackling, old hag.
- "Old"? Wait, wait. You said "old"?
- I mean, cackling hags.
- Yeah, now it's old. Now we're old, cackling hags.
- Jessel says whatever the hell she wants at any time,
and she doesn't think about the repercussions
or how people are gonna take it.
Should I call you a stupid bitch and be like...
[laughing] "Oh, it's just stupid bitch.
No big deal, it's what we say in New York."
Like... [chuckles]
- Okay, Jessel, here's the one thing--
is that just, like, at least
just be like "You know what? I said it."
- I did say I said it.
- But don't try to redefine it postmortem.
- It could be received in different ways.
- Do you want to take it back? - No. I said it.
That's how my sh-- is, dude. - Your sh-- stinks, for sure.
- I was talking with Jenna, and I said,
"You guys, I felt like I was getting ambushed,"
and that you guys are like a bunch of cackling, old hags.
- I feel like you were annoyed the whole weekend.
I feel like you didn't have a good time.
And then you, like-- sometimes I look at you,
and you look miserable, honestly, like, not happy.
- I need to get out. - Jessel hates this.
- I need to go home and see my kids
and give them dinner.
No. Look, guys, I missed my kids.
I mean, it's kind of, like, one of the first
or second times I've ever been away from them.
Like, there's a lot of things
that I'm not gonna, like, just--
- Then why don't you tell us?
How am I supposed to know that--
- But what am I gonna be like-- - I thought you were miserable.
- Time-out-- you kept saying to us,
"I have to see my kids.
Get me the (BLEEP) out of here. I have to see my kids."
And you were so irritated, and then I texted you that night...
- Yeah. - And I said,
"Hi, honey. Are you okay?" - Yeah.
- 'Cause I knew you were angry. - And what did I say to you?
- And you said, "I'm good. I'm going out."
So you talked all day about you wanting to--
- That was the day after. - Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
- Okay, well, if it was that day, it was for a work thing,
'cause I had to go to work dinner that night.
- I thought you weren't working.
- And I had to feed my kids, and I had to get ready,
and I had to go to a work dinner.
- You're working now? - Of course I am.
- I didn't know you were currently working.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Oh, okay.
- I mean, I got to work. Mama's gonna bring in the money.
- Trust me. I hear you.
But I just didn't know. I really didn't know.
- Yeah, no, I'm working.
So condescending.
I've been a fashion publicist for almost 20 years.
I've worked my whole life.
I'm really not sure why she's so confused.
- Jessel told me she was taking a break from work
after she had the twins.
She never told me she started again.
I'm not a mind reader.
- Jessel, when's the last time that you came?
- Came where? - I rest my case.
[laughter] - Okay. We talked about this.
- Did anything change? - No.
- Did you talk about it? - I told you about it.
- Oh, I was so excited.
I thought you were gonna be like,
"I ----ed my husband last night."
- Oh, yeah. Well, no, that hasn't happened yet.
I speak to all my friends about it, too, and it's not abnormal.
Sai: I spread my legs.
- Girl... [chuckles]
- Even with my kids.
They sleep on a different floor.
- Look, I think it's like a process.
Like, it takes time.
- If you start with a blow job,
it tends to always go well after.
Just pop the seal.
- That's what it is. It's popping the seal.
- You know what's coming back? Hand jobs. They're back.
- What is it-- the thing, hand job?
- Yeah. Hand jobs are back. - Hand jobs should die.
- No. They're the best. - Can I tell you something?
Anything that has a "job" in it, I don't want it.
- "Job"? [laughter]
- Coming up...
- I'm sorry that you're getting upset.
Like, that must've really triggered you.
- Yeah, you did trigger me.
[upbeat music]
* *
[baby wails]
- Excuse me. You're not dancing on tables.
You're not your mother. - I certainly hope not.
[both laugh]
- This is pure chaos. I love it.
- Where are we going?
- We're gonna do the tree real quick.
- Okay, okay, okay, okay. [baby crying]
Okay, let's go. Come on, come on, come on, real quick.
- I just need one good shot.
- It's actually going better than I thought.
- It actually is going way better than I--
[baby wails]
- Hey, welcome. - Hi.
Oh, I love this.
Black salmon. Oh, really? It's made out of salmon?
- Yeah. - That's so weird and creepy.
[salesperson chuckles] I love it.
* *
- This hot dog is so good, no?
So how does this become really sour?
- They put it in brine with a lot of garlic.
- Yeah, these are my favorite.
Which one are yours? - Same one.
- Did you try ginger ale with this?
- Really? - It is good, yeah.
I did this in a champagne glass and pretend it's champagne.
- There you go. - [chuckles]
* *
- Hey, girls.
- Look at all of these wonderful gifts.
It's like Christmas. Wait. I'm so out of breath.
[laughter]
So, obviously, Emma, I know, like, you're just joining us,
but, like, when you get these gifts, nothing is free.
I actually majored in biology.
I wanted to be a pediatrician.
But I always loved fashion,
so I started my first internship at Alberta Ferretti.
I love myself some Jimmy Choo. [gasps]
Love! Look at these. - Ooh.
- I did that internship, and then after that,
I was like, "Mm, I'm gonna work for myself."
[imitates fanfare] - Oh, my God.
- Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me?
- Are you kidding me?
This is a bodega run. - Got it.
- Stop. - Yeah.
- I'm gonna be in the bodega with these.
I learned how to code, so I got my own website,
and I started blogging,
and I started with just my daughter, and I was like,
"I'm gonna do children's fashion!"
And kind of got into the space with Mommy & Me.
Nine months later, Buzzfeed did an article,
and it went viral,
and that's kind of like how I got to where I am.
Oh, my God, it's monogrammed with my name on it.
- What? - A Versace robe.
- This is the most extra thing I've ever seen in my life.
- Oh, bitches, I am extra. Excuse me?
[laughter] - This is ridiculous.
- Do you know my name?
Let me turn around and show you.
[laughter] What's my name?
Over the years, obviously, it evolved.
I have an accountant. I have an attorney.
I have a brand manager. I have an editor.
So we showcase how to get the most
out of your complexion routine
using four core Bobbi Brown products.
I have people who pull looks all the time
to help me put things together.
I pay everyone on payroll. I offer health insurance.
There are certain things that I don't think people realize--
like this is very much so a real job.
As you can see, I've taken a dent to this,
but let's start out by using this.
Brands usually come to me
because they already are familiar with my content.
In exchange, you do deliverables.
These can be anything from reels to Instagram photos
to TikToks to full-on YouTube videos.
And then I'm like... [cash register bell rings]
So this weekend all I need you to do is VS.
- Correct. Static and story.
- And what are the stories?
- You can do either your love story, date night--
- So I'm getting dressed for date night?
Or this is what I'm wearing?
I'm wearing lingerie for date night, basically?
- Yeah, how you spin it into an outfit, basically.
- Oh, but I am spinning it into an outfit?
It's not just like, "Hey, I'm a ho"?
- I mean is that your date-night look?
- I'ma be a ho tonight. - Here's the teaser.
- Yeah. Here's my tits.
I'm wearing Victoria's Secret. [laughter]
- Swipe up. [laughs] - Don't forget to swipe up.
[laughter]
* *
- Can I do Americano, extra shot,
and then do you have oat milk? - Yes.
- Okay, awesome. Thank you. - Sure.
* *
both: Hi.
- How are you? - Good. How are you?
- Good. Thanks for coming downtown.
- Oh, my God. I don't usually look this, like, done up.
I had an event. - Yeah, wow.
Jessel and I are not in a place
where, like, we're going for coffee.
So, clearly, she wants to talk to me about something.
- I ordered a coffee. I'm sorry.
I'm, like, so tired. - No, it's fine.
I'm gonna order one, too. - Okay, good.
- Maybe Jessel realizes she was annoying AF in the Hamptons,
and she's coming to me to say,
"Sorry for being such a pain in the ass at your house."
Hopefully.
You look great. - Thank you.
Are you coming on Thursday, by the way?
- Yeah. - You are?
- Yeah, I think so. - Okay, good, good.
Yeah, I'm, like, trying to, like,
get everything organized right now. It's, like--
- So are you having it, like, catered and stuff?
- Yeah.
That's Americano, right? - Yes.
- Yeah, Americano with an extra shot and oat milk.
- Ooh. - It's my cocktail.
- Can I have a cappuccino? - Sure. Regular milk?
- Yeah, thank you. - You're welcome.
- Mmm. - Have you ever been here?
This is, like, my local spot. - It's gorgeous.
- I come all the time.
- A couple of my friends are moving to Tribeca,
and this neighborhood's, like, really up and coming.
- It's not-- it's there.
- Is it there? - [chuckling] Oh, yeah.
- I mean, I feel like it still needs, like, the restaurant--
I mean, you know-- Is it there?
I feel like there's still a lot of potential.
- "Potential"? It's like, the most expensive zip code.
Not that I'm saying that for me.
It's just, like-- it's already there.
I am at a loss for words.
As a real-estate person,
this is the most ridiculous comment
I've ever heard in my entire life.
As a New Yorker, that just doesn't go.
Like, that doesn't connect for me.
What this tells me is that
you know absolute nothing about New York City
and you just got here yesterday.
- Anyway, how was Friendsgiving for you?
- I thought it was nice. I thought it was fun.
- Yeah, Sai did, like, an amazing job.
- Sai did a great job.
- I wanted to, like, grab a coffee with you
'cause I felt like-- - Yeah.
I didn't understand what this was about.
[chuckles] - Look, I walked in,
and I sort of came up to you, and I was--
I didn't know about your grandmother, first of all.
I'm so sorry.
Mwah. How are you? How was the memorial?
- It was sad.
- I didn't know, so... - Yeah.
- That's really unfortunate.
Well, I hope that today went well, though.
- Yeah, it was fine. - Sai!
[dramatic music]
Just felt like you were not your usual, warm self.
I wanted to make sure everything was good, you know?
* *
- I mean, yeah, everything's fine.
I...to be honest with you,
feel like we're just very different people.
Like, I don't really understand the way sometimes you are.
It almost makes me uncomfortable.
- To be honest with you, feel like
we're just very different people.
Like, I don't really understand the way sometimes you are.
You're, like, smiling and happy,
but then, like, you're not.
You seem like you're being positive,
but then you're, like, really upset about something.
And, like, in the Hamptons...
- I feel like a Christmas tree. This is not my vibe at all.
It is freezing. - I'm sorry.
I don't know what to do.
- I literally cannot even connect
to any-----ing-thing here.
- This is what I think, and you can tell me if I'm wrong.
- But tell me, like, what?
- I think you're used to being, like,
maybe treated a certain way or, like...
- Like what?
- Maybe I wasn't catering to you,
like, the way that you were expecting to.
- Okay, so I'm a princess?
- Maybe a little bit. Is that bad? Are you?
- A princess that doesn't work, apparently,
'cause I've had this conversation--
- You told me that you weren't really working right now,
since you had the twins. - I never said that.
- I don't remember you telling me.
- Let me tell you that-- - Okay.
- And so we don't have to repeat this.
I launched my own consultancy.
I'm starting to take on designers again.
- Great. - I'm working.
I truly, like, embrace women
that are working. - Now I don't embrace women?
- No, that's not what I'm saying.
I'm just saying you didn't remember.
- Yeah, watch that.
- You just said that you don't think I work.
All I'm gonna say is, I--
- Mazel tov to you for starting your own business.
I did not know that you launched it,
but, like, don't ever even try
to say that I don't build women up.
Like, that's not okay.
- We need to support each other,
and I just didn't feel that from you.
- This is why I have trouble with Jessel.
I don't know that she's working again
because she never told me, and now I don't support women,
which is incredibly insulting.
I didn't know that you started back up again.
I have said it now a few times. - Okay.
And you just said that, like, you feel like
I'm used to be catered to and that I'm a princess.
- I'm sorry that you're getting upset.
Like, that must have really triggered you.
- Well, I'm getting upset
because I've never been called a princess before
and I've never, ever, ever had anyone say,
"You seem like people cater to you."
I'm an immigrant in this country.
I came here, I had nothing, and I worked my way to the top.
And so being catered to?
No, that's extremely condescending.
- I just feel like...
like maybe we are not... the same.
- Yeah, definitely not on the same page.
Like, I don't have time for, like, fake friends.
So...
cheers to that. [chuckles]
- If I can have an honest conversation with Jessel,
I'm good--I'll move on.
But it's very hard for me
to have a conversation with someone
who just will not see their part in any situation.
Well, I really got to get back to work.
- Yeah. Same.
I have to, like, go take off--
- Oh, you're gonna go to work?
I'm kidding. - Yes, I'm gonna go to work.
- I'm kidding. - I have to take off my face.
I have to do a lot of things. - Okay.
- And I have to prepare for this charity event on Thursday.
- I know. You have a lot happening.
- I'm disappointed.
I really had the purest of intentions
to connect with Erin, to bond.
I thought we were gonna have a little laugh over some coffees,
but this went south really quick,
and I felt like we took five step backwards
instead of moving forward.
[suspenseful music]
* *
- So ----ing weird. She's a lunatic.
[upbeat music]
- * Ba-ba-ba-da, I wanna see the sun come up *
* Ba-ba-da, we'll make it through this *
* Ba-ba-ba-da, I wanna see the sun come up *
* Ba-ba-da-ba *
- Oh. Did you order a stripper? [laughter]
- Yes!
[laughs] I'm so glad you're here.
Have you ever seen those, like, Instagram things
where I, like, sell my clothes?
- Of course I have. - I need to do that again.
And so there's a bunch of stuff downstairs
that I wanted to go through.
- You know I love going into that storage unit.
It's, like, my favorite.
- I like it better now that it's organized.
It was a little bit of a sh-- show.
[Heather chuckles] People oftentimes give me sh--
for having so many clothes and so many shoes,
but, like, I'm sorry.
No one asks why a photographer has, like,
an archive of their photos-- like, it's what I did.
However, I periodically have to, like, go through
and cull it-- it's too much.
And also, like, I evolve, and I get fat.
There's that, too.
- Oh, yes.
[energetic music]
Oh, you have done some major cleaning out.
- I did.
- No, this was, like, stacked to the ceiling.
- I know, I know. - Wow.
- I've really been working on it--
[item clatters] Whoopsie.
- I'm so impressed.
- I really love the experience of selling things on Instagram.
And, like, when I post a picture, people are like,
"I loved that thing! Can I buy it?"
And I'm like, "Definitely."
There's something nice about knowing it's going to someone
who liked it or saw it or loves it and appreciates
'cause a lot of stuff is beautiful designer clothes,
that I just don't wear anymore.
They need to have a second life...
just like me.
All right, I'm gonna do this, and then I'll--
- And then I'll whip it around? - Yeah.
- Yeah, there we go.
All right.
Racks on racks on racks on racks.
- I know. All right, there we go.
- Okay. We're good.
- Here, look, I put a chair here for you.
- Oh, my God, I love you. - You get to be a voyeur.
So I wore this to a 50th birthday party the other day.
- It kind of says "single lady."
[both laugh]
- I wore this to the White House,
and I got to meet the Obamas and take a picture with them.
- Then I would not sell that.
- I love that, but we're gonna sell it.
- Oh, really?
I'll put it over here in the maybes.
- Isn't that ball? - It's iconic. Sell it.
- What about this?
- Love. Sell that baby.
- Shoes, I can't. - Yeah, that's too much.
- I can't handle right now.
I don't think I can sell this.
- I'll be the judge. [chuckles]
- When I met Kate Middleton...
- We sell it. - We sell.
- Beyoncé actually wore it. Can you ----ing imagine?
- No. That's incredible. We're gonna sell it.
I like the mystery bags, actually, the most.
- [gasps]
And this is my senior project from Parsons.
Donna Karan said, "I want you to quilt it."
And I didn't have any money,
and I had to make it out of a comforter.
- What? No, it's fantastic. [Jenna laughing]
Wait, get over here. I have to have a picture.
- I can't believe I still have it.
- Did you get A-plus? - I got an A-plus.
- Of course. - I did well.
[chuckles] - Yay.
- Coming up...
- Can't say anything to Jessel. She's gonna get offended.
Everyone's, like, walking on eggshells with her.
- She obviously has a lot going on.
[upbeat music]
- * Only a step away *
* Gotta keep on moving *
* I'm only a step away *
- May I please have a almond-milk latte?
- Sure.
And this is a complimentary cookie on the house.
- No!
- My mom made them, so... - Are you serious?
- Mm-hmm. - That is literally delicious.
You got a good mom. - Thank you.
- * Only step away *
* Gotta keep it moving *
* I'm moving, yeah, I'm moving *
- Hello. - Hello.
Oh, give it to me.
- I got legs out, baby. - You got legs for days.
Hi, honey-boo-boo.
- Wait, let me order a tea real quick.
- Get coffee or tea. - And I'll come sit.
- Hi, how are you? - Hi.
- Could I have a black tea? Thank you.
What's up? What's new? - Nothing, boo-boo.
What you doing?
- I just came back from a work event.
And... - Yeah?
- I love that you're, like, really playing chess.
- [chuckles] This is my travel set.
I love this one... - Let me see it.
- 'Cause it is the thing that started it all.
As a kid, I always wanted to do certain things.
I wanted to do ballet. We couldn't afford it.
I do fencing. I like to play chess.
I took violin lessons, I've taken piano lessons.
Everything that I wanted to do as a kid...
[laughs] I do it as an adult.
So I'm playing in a chess tournament soon.
- I'm excited for you. Do we buy tickets?
- This is complimentary with your tea.
- Aw, that's so nice. Was is it 'cause I smiled?
[barista chuckles] - Don't make me jealous.
- I don't usually smile. - [laughs]
- So what else is going on?
- I got a very interesting phone call from Jessel.
- What happened?
- She's like, "I'm so over the Hamptons."
- But what is there to be over? I don't understand.
- I think she's like, "I met up with Erin,
"and I just had to tell her, like,
I just want to move on from all this, and"--
Anyhow, so I called Erin.
I was like, if you're gonna be in the area, just stop by.
- I wonder what conversation they had.
- That's why I invited Erin. I'm just curious.
- Let's spill the tea and play chess.
It's been a while.
I have not played in quite some time.
I literally don't even know what--
- They're so little, these little pieces.
- Hi, guys. - Hi.
- Oh, my God. Hi, babygirl. - Hi.
- You look gorge. - You guys look so cute.
- Can you be more excited to see me?
- Look at you guys. - Go grab a coffee.
And then let me know about some tea that's going on.
- Oh, my God, I know--we didn't get to talk yesterday.
- Get your coffee, then we'll do the tea.
- Jessel and I had two different conversations.
We did not have the same one.
It was like arguing with a chatbot.
You enter information, and out comes word salad.
It's nonsense.
- So I need to know. What happened?
- Oh, my God. - Tell me everything.
- Okay, so some of the crazy things she said yesterday.
We sit down, she's like, "Oh, this area's so cute.
Like, very up and coming."
Up and coming. Tribeca's up and coming.
- Can you imagine? [laughter]
Oh, my God, wait.
- It, like, really caught me off-guard.
- That's really ----ed up. - Shut up.
Tribeca's up and coming?
I think that was when JFK Jr.
and Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy lived there.
That's when it was up and coming.
- She's, like, sh---ing on my neighborhood.
I'm like, "Do you even know what you're--
Like, what you're saying is outrageous."
- Does she know where she is? - [laughing] I don't know.
- Maybe she didn't know where she was.
- She's really clueless.
- So you don't know--I got a phone call this morning.
- From her?
- I love how you just have to say the pronoun.
"From her?" We don't even need proper nouns here.
We're just doing pronouns,
and we all know who we're talking about.
- What's going on with you guys?
- Was she, like, upset with you?
- No, but she was, like,
"Everyone won't stop talking about the Hamptons."
Like, "Let's stop talking about the Hamptons."
- I'm like, no one was trying to attack you.
We just voiced our opinion... - Right.
- So that you could understand how that was wrong.
And I was like, "I just feel like you're--
"like, maybe you grew up sheltered,
or, like, nobody really told you did anything wrong."
- She was like, "So you're calling me a princess?"
I'm like, "I didn't say that.
You called yourself a princess."
- [chuckles]
- I'm like, "I didn't say that."
But all of a sudden,
she starts welling up, like, in tears.
I'm like, "What just happened?"
- I love the fact that she calls you a cackling hag.
You call her a princess, and she's end up that cries.
- Can't say anything to Jessel. She's gonna get offended.
Everyone's, like, walking on eggshells with her.
- And she keeps saying like, "I want to move on,
I want to move on," but then you're bringing this stuff up,
and you're not taking the steps to move on,
which is all it would take is, "Yeah, I did it. What's up?"
- I feel like there's obviously--
I mean, I'm also over talking about the Hamptons
and everything she did-- she's never gonna own it.
- Yeah. - There is no accountability.
That's how she is. - I don't know.
Like, if you want me to let things go
but if you don't take accountability,
then I just let you go.
- Or she could even just be like, "I didn't mean to."
- "I didn't mean it. I know I said it."
- She's still owning it, right? - Right, exactly.
- I think the whole problem is that
she doesn't own anything that she does.
Jessel is sweet, and I don't think
she's a malicious person, but she can't take
accountability for sh-- she says.
Can you just say sorry so we can move on?
- She was like, "You're a woman in business.
I'm a woman, and I support other women."
And I was like, "Don't you dare."
- What is this? Now we're talking women supporting women?
- But that has nothing to do with anything.
She obviously has a lot going on--something's wrong.
Now I need to know, you hag, are you...
- Going? - Or you going to her event?
- I wasn't going to, honestly. - Really?
- No.
But the fact that she said that I don't know
about her work stuff, that I'm not supporting women?
Like, I'm not giving her that.
You know what I mean? - Yeah, yeah.
- So I'm going. - Yeah.
- And I'll support her. I'm happy to support her.
- I will pop in. - Okay.
- Yeah. - Wait. Is it my go?
I lost this sh-- a while back.
Rule number one-- protect your pawns.
Pawns are the most important thing.
People sacrifice them, but you got to protect your pawns.
- Yeah, but I'm ----ing you up. - But I mean--
- You're telling me all these tricks,
but those tricks are not working for you, baby.
- My tricks are for kids. - But she's winning.
- Your tricks are for children,
because this is not working for you.
- I'm gonna ---ing just--
I'm gonna get so hammered after I fail out of this tournament.
- Coming up...
- That is not normal. What are you doing?
Pavit, what is wrong with you? - It's healthier.
It's healthier. - He's trying to be healthy.
[upbeat music]
* *
- 'Cause maybe it's nice to have...
- This is gorgeous.
- You know, I don't like these. I'm gonna put these away.
- Okay. - I set out the ones I like.
- I love. Are you happy with everything?
I think it looks-- - Everything looks beautiful.
- Beautiful. - Yeah.
- I'm really excited to launch
my first-ever fashion consultancy.
It's called The Know, as in you're in The Know.
Congratulations, honey.
Esha used to run creative design for Michael Kors,
I used to run Michael Kors's PR,
and I've just seen her flourish
into this incredible designer,
and I really want to support her
as she goes on to her own endeavors.
- Pavit's, like, with his carrot in his champagne.
[laughs]
- That is not normal. What are you doing?
Pavit, what is wrong with you? - It's healthier.
It's healthier. - He's trying to be healthy.
- Can you not act like this in front of people, please?
[Pavit laughs]
- Ugh, this guy gives me so much anxiety.
[laughs]
Are you gonna get this working? - Yeah, I'll get it working.
- Everyone's so busy this week.
I know that Ubah's working. She's got a photo shoot.
- Jenna's got something going on.
- What does she have going on? - I don't know.
I think she said she has an event
at her house or something-- bummer. [sputters]
[upbeat music]
* *
- You guys, I'm feeling this for me.
I think this is working for me.
- The ladder or the lights? - Just the whole situation--
the jumpsuit, the ladder.
- You look precarious. I'm just saying.
[Jenna laughs, Brandon chuckles]
- Okay, let's make sure she--
okay, there she goes. - Okay.
- Thar she blows. - Tell me when you're ready.
- I didn't actually get custom jumpsuits for everyone.
I just have the world's free supply of jumpsuits.
I really--I love a jumpsuit.
Look at that, you guys.
- Three... all: Two, one.
[laughter]
- I love all the ornaments,
I like the house smelling like cinnamon,
I like the music. I want to hear Mariah.
Like, I love Christmas. [chuckles]
Where do you think Rudolph should go?
I like lots of lights.
It's, like, basically like sequins on a plant.
- Right there.
Up a little bit. Right there, right there.
- I realize that I don't have a lot of time before Christmas
with Beckett to do the tree.
I need to give you some sparkly ones up there, B.
Like, these are the twinkle.
Two weeks out of the month of December
that I get to be with him, so, unfortunately,
Beckett is going to usurp my Jessel visit.
I can support her in other ways--it's fine.
- [laughs] That was like a-- What's that game?
- Okay. Oh. - Oh!
- Wait, what did you-- I feel like--
- Don't! Stop, stop! - Why? Come on.
- No! I just--no. I don't need that.
- Boys do Christmas different.
[laughter] - Yes!
- Oh, God. Let's not do that. - No.
- Let's not--okay. [babbles] Can we just stop it?
- She's not looking.
[laughter] - Wow.
Yes.
[knock at door] - Oh, my goodness!
- Hello! - Hi!
- Wow, there's a lot of fashion going on here.
- Please, can we have a moment?
- Again, I want to make the bags look tasteful
in comparison. [laughter]
- A successful event in the fashion world
is all about who's there,
and that's really my goal here.
It's to get Esha's name out there.
- Hi! Good to see you. - Sally!
Hi, honey!
This event's in partnership with CITTA,
so all the funds from sales are going to go towards
helping impoverished children in India.
I didn't hear from "Vogue." - Hi.
- Hi! - Is this a shoe house?
- Shoes on! - Okay. Hi.
- Hi. You look amazing. - Thank you, thank you.
- How are you? - I'm so tired.
I so appreciate you coming.
- I'm really exhausted, but that's okay.
Oh, look, you have snacks.
Yeah, they look amazing. - It's really good.
- Enjoy. - Thank you so much.
- Thank you. - You're welcome.
- So what else is going on?
I heard that you and Erin got into a little thing.
I heard you got emotional.
- No, I wasn't emotional. It was just awkward.
And, you know, she said--
- She called you a princess, and you cried, didn't you?
- She didn't call me a princess.
She said, "I think you like being catered to."
And I was like, "So you're calling me a princess?
- That's right. She did say that.
- So I took offense to that because I'm like you.
Like, I came here with no money.
I ----ing worked my ass off.
Maybe I give off, like, a certain vibe.
- You seem like you do come from money.
Seems like there's some old money there.
[English accent] Maybe it's the English accent.
- At this point, they're just making assumptions
based off of how I sound and how I look.
Isn't that illegal in America?
- [normal voice] But don't be offended.
If somebody looked at me like old money,
I'd be like...[laughs] [Jessel laughs]
"Yes, darling!" [laughter]
- Yeah, exactly.
I love you. Thank you so much. - Of course.
both: Mwah. - Just own it. Remember.
Oh. - Ah, she came!
- Oh, my God. I made it. - Oh, hello.
- What is this? [laughs]
- You look like a Christmas star.
- Hi! - How are you?
I thought you were working.
- I was until, like, 5:30. - I love you.
By the way, these are my favorite cookies.
- I would love ginger ale on a champagne glass.
May I sit? - Yes, yes, yes, sit.
Let me go say--I need to say hi to some people real quick.
- I haven't seen you since my Friendsgiving.
- Oh.
- And then she was like, and I was like...
- Look who it is!
- And she was like, and I was-- - Oh, my God.
I was talking about you. - Oh, yeah, I heard you, bitch.
- She looks pampered. She looks like old money.
- I look like old money-- Oh, my God.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
- I know, right? Right? - You see?
- That's, like, the best compliment.
I would love to be called a princess.
Can I add that to LinkedIn?
Old money? That's like my-- - Isn't it the best compliment?
- That is so sweet. - I just told that to Jessel.
- By the way... - I'm so glad to see you.
- You look like a ----ing artist.
- I kind of know who this jacket belongs to.
- [laughing] Oh, yeah. - Do I know?
- This is a boys' jacket. - Uh-oh, Brynn.
Where did you sleep last night?
- No. - Oh, my gosh.
You streetwalker. - Yeah.
Men's clothes are the best.
Oh, if I'm wearing, like, a blazer,
it's always a dude's jacket.
[chuckles]
The jacket is actually made by a brand
called none of your business. [chuckles]
It's nobody business whose blazer it is.
It's my blazer now.
[indistinct chatter]
- I feel like once you get this on, you can't get it off.
- This is actually connected to the actually bag.
- Oh, I thought it was a bracelet.
That's so cute. - It's so cute.
- We've been selling a few bags,
so I'm gonna be writing you another check.
- You're kidding. Really? - Yes!
- That's amazing. - How was your chess?
Did you go to your chess tournament?
- I did my little chess ac-ti-on.
I did-- - After I whupped your ass.
- Yeah, I ----ing bit it, too.
[tense music]
* *
- You want to get-- Just that.
Hit your side. Just smack that.
- This one. - The top.
- Oh, sorry. Am I good now? - You're good.
* *
- Thank you.
Most of the times when I play--
it's actually when I go into chess clubs--
I feel like Elle Woods.
But in the end, I think she wins, right?
Me? [clicks tongue]
- You guys are hanging out without me?
- Do you think I'm cheating on you?
- I really think you are.
You are like--
- Can I be the shorter boyfriend?
- Yeah. - You know, you remember
the model aways has a short, rich boyfriend?
A short, rich boyfriend
who shows up on the red carpet, and he's like this.
- [laughing] - "I got a hot model.
I'm rich."
- You know, that always happens.
- Always. - Shorter guys like tall girls.
- Oh, they love it, and they always are like...
- [laughs]
Shorter guys are very, very, like, confident.
If you find a short, bald man, that man will come and reach up
and look at you like you are the sun.
- I got a fat wallet and a trophy on my arm.
- I love it.
- They can stand on their money, when they're short.
If you can stand on your money...
- You can stand on your money. - Yeah.
- Or they don't need a booster chair
'cause the wallet's the booster chair.
The wallet is the booster chair.
- This is Brynn's favorite. - I'm like, "Darling."
- I have a PhD in this. - "Stand on your wallet.
If you're my height, we'll talk."
- My queen, I will crawl on the top of my money to reach you.
- Coming up...
- I don't think Jenna said it. I think Jessel said it.
- It's Jenna Lyin', not Jenna Lyons.
[upbeat music]
* *
- How are you? Are you Felicia?
- Yes. - I've met you before.
- It's French calf. It's made in Italy.
- I love it. I'm eyeing this one and that.
- I would buy the tote bag. - Yeah, that's cute.
- That's a really cute tote bag.
I think it's so chic.
- Wait, where's Erin? - Oh, I don't know.
Should I text her? - Where's Jenna Lyons?
[person squeals]
[quirky dramatic music]
- Babies! [person chuckles]
[Brynn and baby laugh]
The boys are here! The boys are here!
So your girlfriend's here!
[both grunt]
Hey, how are you? - How are you?
- Good. - They really love you.
- I do not know how you guys do it.
- You got lipstick on your cheek--I got you.
- Who kissed him on the cheek like that?
- How cute. - I'll kiss him.
- I'm trying to make his girlfriend jealous.
- Oh, my God, this kid. - I'm gonna call Jenna.
Do you know where Jenna is? - Where's Jenna?
- She couldn't come today. - No? Why not?
- She said she had an event at her place.
[cell phone ringing] - Down a little.
The blue and the pink right there--
put one up-- [laughs]
- Jenna, where are you?
- Jenna!
- Here.
- Oh, she's doing a Christmas thing.
- Oh, that's so cute.
- Is that your son?
- There he is. I'm sorry, guys.
I don't get to see him all the time.
Look at how cute. And lookit, there's Violet.
And that's one goddaughter, goddaughter number two.
- Aw, that's really sweet. both: Oh, hi!
- And there's Brandon over there cooking.
- Hi, Brandon. - Brandon!
[grunts] Brandon!
- Wow, you got a really positive response.
[laughter]
Yeah, so I'm sorry. I wish I was there with you guys.
- You're so pampered, having your tree done for you.
- [laughs] Well, it took a lot of work
to get it to this perspective, but...
- We miss you! - I miss you guys.
- I love you, Jenna! We'll call you later.
- Okay. Bye, sweetheart.
- Tell them I'll meet them out later. [laughs]
- I'm gonna go say hi.
- Okay, so wait a second.
She's putting together a Christmas tree,
Hallmark moment, but I thought there was an event?
- I actually thought she has an event.
- Why can't she just say, like, "My son's coming over.
We're gonna put together a tree."
Like, why is it, like...
- Hi. - Oh, hello, Erin!
- Oh, look what the cat dragged in!
- Hi! - Hi.
- You look beautiful. - How are you?
- I'm good. How are you?
- Good. This is so pretty.
- Listen, before you even, like, walk into the house,
my intention with that conversation was to, like,
you know, just kind of get over it.
- Yeah. No, I hear you.
- And I'm sorry if I, like, offended you in any way,
and that's not my intention at all.
- Thank you.
- I'm surprised Erin came, because I think
that we left things in a weird place.
And, quite frankly,
I want to cut the root of the weed
before it grows into a weed.
We want to play nice in the playground.
- I'm trying to make an effort.
That's why I came, even though the baby is not feeling well.
- And I'm so sorry to hear that.
- But I wanted you to know that I support you...
- Thank you. It means a lot. - And your new venture.
- That means a lot, truly. - All good.
I'm done. I don't hold grudges.
Hopefully we can move on and be like normal friends.
But I'm not forgetting how crazy you are.
But we're good right now.
[sighs] I could use a drink very badly.
- Yeah, I'm gonna get you a champagne.
- I'm leaving. Are you guys buying anything?
- I will donate to the charity. - Yeah, I want to donate, too.
So how do I do that? - Ask Michael.
both: Yeah, ask Michael. - Okay.
- Hi, girls. - Hello.
- Hi! - Oh, my God, you are here!
I was just about to leave!
- I had the day from ----ing hell.
- What happened?
- Baby's sick, and I gave him Motrin, and he was fine.
But, like, that stupid head thermometer is so inaccurate.
It said 107.
- He would've started seizing. - And I knew that,
like, innately, but I called the doctor,
and they were like-- - How many times did you do it?
- I did it, like, ten times, so I freaked out.
I need a drink. - Sh--.
- Who's that?
- Oh, my God.
- Who's that? - She's amazing.
- I never get impressed by anyone.
- She's amazing. - She's amazing.
She's iconic. She has these, like, red dots.
I don't know if they're tattooed.
Okay, Jessel, we get it. That's legit, you know?
It's like having André Leon Talley
or, like, Grace Coddington walk in.
It's very, very... [whistles]
[indistinct chatter]
- Hi. Can I have some white wine?
- Enjoy. [indistinct chatter continues]
- My love. Sit, sit, sit, sit, sit.
I save it for you.
- Did you get wine? Do they have wine here?
[tense and quirky notes]
- You have to taste it.
- Is it not Trader Joe's wine? - [laughs] It's worse.
- Two Buck Chuck?
- It's worse.
- I (BLEEP) with 2 Buck Chuck, though.
- Rancid. It's so bad. Sorry, Jessel.
So, guys, you're all invited to my anniversary party.
I haven't, like, fully told you.
- I'm gonna wear pasties.
- Please do.
- Do you want diamonds?
- I want to be drenched in diamonds.
- (BLEEP), yeah.
- A sick dress,
and we're saying vows 'cause we never said them.
- Stop. - We never said our vows.
- Are you writing them? - Yeah.
- I just have one question--
is Erin gonna serve us any type of food?
That's all I want to know.
Because we all know
Erin's track record for hosting is an F.
- Hello. - Hi.
- Jenna tell you that she had an event tonight?
- She said she had an event at her house.
- We just FaceTimed her, and she's like,
"I'm decorating my Christmas tree."
- She said that today?
- Jenna gets away with ----ing murder.
- I don't think Jenna said it. I think--
- It's Jenna Lyin', not Jenna Lyons.
It's Jenna Lyin', emphasis L-I-E.
- Please don't confuse me.
English my, like, fourth language.
[laughter]
- If I was the one that was honest
about not coming to this,
there would've been hell to pay.
I would've been accused of the worst possible thing.
I was out partying,
I was at Marquee with all their husbands
and we went to Sapphire's.
Like, that's what would've happened.
- I was taken back, 'cause you said she was at an event.
- Like, when you do homework with Rio and London,
do you call it, "I have an event at my house"?
No, it's called you're doing homework with your kids.
You're spending time with your family.
Like, is that the thing people do now?
We're calling them events?
- Oh, my God, I had an event last night.
My son did a project. It was the most amazing event.
- I guess this morning when I took a sh--, I had a gala.
[laughter] - She's naughty.
- Oh, my God, you're on your knees.
- I'm on my knees, girl. - I love it.
- Is that the first time on your knees on this carpet?
Yes or no?
- Uh... - Don't think, don't think.
- Oh, my God. She's in her house today.
She's not gonna answer this question.
- Look, you know what? Don't answer the question.
- I'm, like, working.
- Once everybody leaves, you know the drill.
Hair's back. You're ready to go.
You know what I'm saying? - Leave Jessel alone.
- What? It's the holidays. Ho, ho, ho.
[laughter]
- I can't handle you.
- Next time
on "The Real Housewives of New York City"...
- Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's it. That's the one.
- Did you get the invite?
- I don't recognize any of these brands.
It's like a Coachella poster.
It was like, "Brought to you by..."
What are we walking into?
- Oh, my gosh. You did such a good job.
- Are you married? - Yeah!
- Kids? - Oh, we have twins.
We have two of 'em. - Don't give up.
Continue, continue. - No, no, no, no, no!
- I'm single, so I'm making moves.
- Did that just happen? - Wait. Since when?
- Last couple weeks.
- I think we're gonna do our vows soon, though, so...
- So wait. If you don't say vows,
then, technically, you're not married.
- No. There's a contract.
Brynn: Well, if there's someone
that knows how to get out of contracts, Abe.
- She's trying to break through--I'm telling you.
Brynn's relentless.
- Whatever you do, don't mess up and say,
"I, Abe, take you, Brynn." [laughter]
- I love you. [cheers and applause]
- I love you two. Make out! Whoo!
- Did Sai leave? - Yeah.
- Wow.
I am so pissed.
- I just want to tell you-- it's a little rude.
We're at her engagement, and you guys are arguing.