- Previously on "The Real Housewives of New York City."
- The married with kids tax.
- What is the married with kids tax?
- Oh, when you're married with kids, sex life? Eh.
- I want to do a staycation in New York
and get, like, a hotel.
- I'm single, so I'm making moves.
- Wait, what? What happened? - Life happened.
[trills] - Oh, my goodness.
- Maybe I have a little crush. - [laughs]
- I just feel alone.
- Ubah, you have so many friends here.
- But I, um...
I don't have my mom. - I know.
- These two came at me.
- Which ones? - Erin and ----ing Sai.
- Your story is about your parents coming from Kenya.
- Is that not part of my story?
- No, we want to know about you!
- Get--
- Take these glasses when you're talking to me,
first of all. - Excuse me?
Do not grab me. - Listen--
- Do not grab me. - You had my ----ing phone!
I'm sorry for taking your glasses, and I'm sorry
for keeping it for 45 minutes. - [laughs]
[upbeat music]
- The secret ingredient?
Darling, it's me.
- My lashes may be fake,
but I definitely keep it real.
- I'm a true New Yorker.
The only bull I'll take is by the horns.
- I always bring the flavor.
It's not my fault you don't have any taste.
- In New York, there's a lot of bad apples,
but I'm the baddest of the bunch.
- I love to laugh, but make me mad,
and I'll date your dad.
[upbeat music]
- Hi. - Hi. Welcome in.
- How are you? - Very good. How are you?
- Good. Take a table for two.
- Come on over. - Thank you.
Oh, my God. - There you are.
- What are you going to get? I'm so hungry.
- I am hungry, too.
- Did I tell you about that music class?
- [laughs] - No, Pavit.
Like, the music class is on this side.
And these two are all the way over there.
- * We got a hi, hello, how are you *
- Kai. Kai-Kai.
Kai. Rio.
Let's go to the music class, okay? Come on. Let's go.
- When they start going to school,
it's going to be, like, a shock.
Like-- - No. It's crazy.
- How are they going to sit still?
Also, going on vacation,
and then leaving your kids behind
and see how it went with no help from a nanny.
- How was it? I was thinking about you guys all the time.
- It was intense. - Yeah.
- Non-stop.
- I carried those twins.
So I think that buys me
at least nine months of vacation time, times two.
- Ready for some food? - I'm going to do the quiche.
- All right. Sounds good. - Chicken and waffles.
Good choice.
- Is it possible to make it extra spicy somehow?
Like, what do you have for hot sauce-wise?
- I can check in with the kitchen, though, and see if--
- This is a French restaurant.
Like, what do you want them to have?
- I just, you know, nice little French homemade hot sauce.
I don't know.
- French people don't even have spicy food.
What are you talking about? - You know, just--
- I'll make sure that it's a little special.
- Thank you. - Thank you.
Thank you so much.
I need a vacation after this vacation.
Like, I'm telling you.
- What are some of the highlights?
- We learned a lot about each other.
I know who to (BLEEP) with and who not to.
Erin with this whole privilege thing again.
- Oh, my God.
- Like, I literally don't know--
- What's wrong with her?
- It's okay if your parents helped you, by the way.
I feel like you're not honest about, like--
- Like, this is not adding up to me.
- My--my parents helped me. - My parents did not help me.
Why would I lie about that?
I'm not trying to paint a picture of, like,
oh my God, I was so poor.
- Okay. Yeah.
- But first of all,
Sai is someone that I love and respect.
I'm not trying to compare my story to her.
There was a point where I had $20 in my bank account.
I'm not even ----ing with you.
- There was a point when I had $0.00.
- Okay, well-- - It was -$498.
- That's scary. - You know what it feels like
to have zero dollars and zero cents?
- I definitely want some--some time with Sai.
I need Sai to understand where I'm coming from,
and a little bit more about me.
We're all adults. Let's squash the beef.
- Oh, wow.
- I'm all about squashing beef.
- So let me know how it is.
And let me know if you need anything, okay?
- Amazing. Thank you so much.
- Thank you, thank you, thank you.
- Um--
- Very good.
- When are we doing our date night?
- Oh, um--I was going to surprise you with that.
- What? - I planned something.
We're going to do a little dinner
and staycation next week.
- We are? - Yeah.
- Are we staying here? - We are staying here.
- Do you have the nanny set up?
- I have everything set up already.
- You have everything set up already?
You know you can't hide anything from me.
I run this household.
How are you going to hide that from me?
- What if I have a secret nanny?
- You have a secret nanny? - Yeah.
- What do you do with the secret nanny?
- Wouldn't you like to know? - [laughs]
- * We don't need no sleepy 'cause the party don't stop *
* So put your hands on me and turn me on, turn me off *
* We don't need no sleepy 'cause the party don't stop *
* So put your hands on me, put-put-put your hands on me *
* And turn me on-on *
[upbeat music]
* *
- Oh, here she is.
Hi, boo-boo. - Hi, baby.
- How are you? - Good.
How are you? - Good. I wore my pajamas.
- Thank you for coming. Would you like me to buy you a drink?
- Oh, I was just-- - What can I get for you?
- Usually what I do at bars, anymore,
is, I just come and I just start.
And then eventually-- - Okay.
- We get a drink.
- Henrietta Hudson's is a place that I went
when I first came out,
so it holds kind of a special place in my heart.
Is this is your first time in a gay bar?
- (BLEEP) no. Get out of here.
But that's why I wore my pajamas.
- Really? A girl--
- I'm ready to go home with anybody.
- [laughs]
I'm actually so relieved that Brynn is here with me,
because the girl has game.
Like, I have none.
I am so shy.
I've never picked anyone up, ever.
- Oh, and I have gloves.
See, I'm ready to finger-bang.
- No, you're not. - Yes, I--Jenna.
Jenna, do not underestimate me.
- You would-- you would hurt someone.
- Do you not--no, I wouldn't. Now they're covered.
That doesn't hurt. I'll go slow.
- That sounds pure-- that's dangerous.
Oh, yes. Wow. Okay.
I'll let you pick.
- I go to gay bars pretty often.
I mean, like, it's--
I don't differentiate between straight or gay.
Look, if there's good-looking people,
I'm going to be there and I'm going to be drinking.
And flirting.
- Who are you-- - I want to make out
with a girl. - You what?
- I want to make out with a girl.
- Okay. [laughs] - Love is love.
I'll take it wherever I can get it.
[indistinct chatter]
- She's so hot.
- Okay, wait. Okay. I need a moment. Stop it.
- She's this-- - Okay, slow down.
- She's coming, she's coming, she's coming.
- Oh, she's coming over? She's coming.
- Oh, my gosh.
- Hi. Hey, I'm Jenna.
- Nice to meet you.
- Hi. - This is Brynn.
- Good to meet you. I'm Brynn. Nice to meet you.
Oh, do you have a little dot here?
- Yeah.
- Oh, I have one too. Wait, no.
This side. Where is mine?
- Oh, I see it. - A little to the left.
- Yeah.
- I've been thinking about getting a little tattoo
to make it more prominent.
Yours is really pretty.
- Brynn's an amazing wingwoman. She's so vivacious.
And she's clearly straight, so she's not a threat.
She's charming.
I--I haven't been single in so long that I don't
actually know how to do any of this stuff anymore.
So I'm, like, having a little bit
of an out-of-body experience.
- How long have you been single?
- Not long enough. [laughs]
- Give me--give me a number. - Like, two months.
- Two months.
All right. How does it feel?
- Um, I feel like I'm a fish out of water.
- Yeah. - Yes. Like, totally.
Like-- - Well, you don't look like it.
- I kind of do. - No, you don't.
You feel much more comfortable now that you're standing.
Maybe you just needed to, like, be grounded.
- Okay. I'm just going to stand.
- Yeah. - Hey, kids.
- Oh, hi. - What are you doing?
- We're just talking.
- Well, you're gorgeous and smart and lovely.
I think we should just do the number exchange.
If you want, I can broker this.
You're going to call me tomorrow.
- Okay. - And da, da, da.
And then as you're looking,
and then you're going to kiss the hand when you give it.
And then you're going to walk away.
And you're going to ruin her life,
and she's going to think about you later
when she touches herself.
Okay. Ready? - Holy sh--.
- I'm going to let you guys have this moment.
- Okay.
- Jenna needs to be a typical New York love story
and date someone younger.
You're successful, you're established,
you have this thing going-- find a young hottie. [laughs]
- It's really hard. Can you get this?
Use your teeth. - Uh, you know what?
Here's the thing. All my teeth are fake,
so it's really dangerous for me to do that,
so I'm not going to. - Will you open it for me?
- Yes, I'm going to open it for you.
- Okay. - All right. Here.
You can do it right there. - Wrist.
I'm going to have to give it to you again.
- It's okay.
You can give it to me as many times as you need to.
- And then of course-- - Oh.
- [smooches] - Thank you.
- And the walk away. - Thank you.
- [laughs]
- Thank you.
- [giggles] Hey.
There you go. - Oh, my God.
- Let me see. And just-- you're not allowed to,
but I'm going to take a picture,
just because your dumb ass is going to be like,
"And then I woke up, and I put together
"a PowerPoint presentation for love scene,
and I totally deleted it."
- I don't know if Katie realizes--[laughs]
How many decades I've-- I've been on this Earth.
Maybe she wants a MILF.
[all cheering]
- Yes, Jenna! - There, baby.
[all cheering] - Yes, yes, yes!
- Oh, my God!
[upbeat music]
* *
[all cheering]
* *
- Coming up.
- If your wife did not have sex with you
for a year and a half, what would happen?
- I would (BLEEP) other women. - [laughs]
[upbeat music]
* *
- I'm so hungry. - I am too.
I want a margarita.
I actually care about drinks more.
- Or--or two.
- Thanks, honey. - After you, beautiful.
- Honestly, if we're good tonight
and the kids feel like sleeping...
- I mean, you don't have to twist my arm.
- Looking forward to getting Erin's feedback on the trip.
- Yeah.
- Oh! - Hi, guys.
- Hi. - We gotta hug.
- Yeah. Hell yeah. I like you already.
- I gotta get up. - Hi. You look so pretty.
- I'm, like, stuck. - You don't have to get up.
- I've, um, ordered some guacamole.
- Great. I'm starving. - Hi, Abe.
David and Abe know each other, and you know what?
Erin said let's go on a double date.
Maybe the guys can
get to know each other a little bit better.
and I thought it would be a great idea.
- They have, like, three micheladas.
- You're into the micheladas? - Yeah.
But I've never--have you ever gone to a place
that has a michelada menu? - I have not.
- It's hard to have couple friends.
- Cheers. - I'm, like--I'm starving.
- Cheers. - Salud.
It's very hard for couples to like each spouse.
Yum.
Did you tell him about the, um, the boat game?
- No. - There's this boat game.
Something about Brynn, we can go in her phone
and text any guy, like, something naughty
or something like that.
Like, and see their response. - Wait. Back up.
- To who?
- You know Jessel and Pavit, they have some sex issues.
- We know. Yes. - Yeah, yeah.
So we have Jessel text her husband.
- Yes.
- We're trying to spice it up for them.
- Right. - Okay.
- Okay, so sexy text. Ready? Be like--
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do it.
- Real talk...
- [laughs]
[notification chimes] - [gasps]
- Wait a sec. - What did he say?
- What did he say?
- "You should really get a towel and dry off."
[laughter]
- Pavit!
- I have a question for you two.
If your wife did not have sex with you
for a year and a half, what would happen?
Like, what would happen? - I would (BLEEP) other women.
- [laughs] - Abe, Oh, my God.
- I'm just-- I'm just saying.
- What kind of a person are you?
I don't appreciate his candor right now.
He's such a little sh--.
- What? - Good to know.
What if I'm, like, going through something?
- He'll be ----ing other women. There you go.
- A year--a year and a half. - Crazy.
- I'm just saying. [laughs]
- What would you do? That's a long time.
- You want my honest? - Yeah, honestly.
- The relationship would probably be over.
- That's the better answer. - No, no, no--
- That's the right answer.
- His answer was a great answer.
- Ding, ding, ding.
- No, his answer was the best answer.
- I won.
- My answer was a consequence of--
- I'm gonna break up first.
I'm just gonna (BLEEP) other women.
- My husband said the right answer,
but that is what a husband should say.
- I would have sex with another man.
- Now, let's not go too far,
because we've talked about this.
- I know. We're not getting into this now.
- Are we not? - Not getting into this.
- What did you guys talk about?
- At one stage in our lives,
maybe there will be a moment of--
You're into swinging. - No, I'm not into swinging.
- Not yet. But I think I could be in, like, ten years.
- What? Okay.
We talked about having a threesome,
and you said it would have to be with two women.
I don't want that. - I didn't say that.
- Yes, you did.
Because I said I want to have sex with another man, then.
- Right. - Otherwise, it's not fair.
- And I would be okay with it
as long as it was in the same room.
- But no, you said you-- - With another guy.
- You said you wouldn't be able to watch it.
- My--my rule would be we have to have it the same room,
with people we don't know.
- Can't be anyone we know.
- Like no friends, whatever,
so that nothing's left to my imagination.
- Jenna had a great idea.
She said, if it's a gay man, then it's fine.
Because it's a gay man, and it's like--it's just sex.
- You want to (BLEEP) a gay guy, though?
- Yeah. If they're, like, middle of the road, yeah.
- What planet are we living on?
- Just hear me out-- - Planet New York.
I will never be in a sexless marriage.
And ten years from now if I'm having issues,
bring in the gays.
Bring in a unicorn. Bring in whoever.
Anything to get us going again,
because I think intimacy is so important.
- None of us have seen each other since Anguilla.
Ubah's doing this healing thing
where we're all going to do a sound bath
and we're going to heal.
- She said you can cry and scream.
- Nothing about this sounds appealing.
- Yeah, this doesn't sound--
- Sound bath sounds nice if that's what's happening.
- I don't--I don't cream. I don't cream. I'm sorry.
[laughter]
I don't scream or cry, so-- in, like, a healing session.
- We're not going to be healing.
We're going to be-- - Not gonna be healing?
- What does that mean? - You know what it means.
- What kind of swingers--
stop trying to recruit us in this swingers thing.
We're not about that life.
[upbeat music]
* *
- Welcome to Bauman Rare Books. - Hi.
I'm a very new collector. Only about, like, five years.
I just randomly started buying them
because I liked them aesthetically,
and then just fell in love.
And it's a slippery slope. - That happens.
Yes. No, it happens. - Some women think shoes.
I'm like, "Don't get started on books."
It goes-- - I know, I know.
Yeah, I know, I know. - Yeah.
- Do you want to take a look at some stuff that we have?
- I would love to. - Yes. Okay.
So what we are mostly excited about,
we do have a first edition of "Jane Eyre."
- Growing up,
my grandmother would always take us to the library.
So avid book reader, avid book lover.
And then I just start being fascinated with antique books.
What is this one? - Oh, yes.
"The Merchant of Venice."
That's Shakespeare as well, 1664.
- I like smelling them. I like touching them.
I like reading them.
I like knowing that this is something
that has survived 200 years.
I'm actually interested in more so,
like, 18th and 19th century books in English
that don't have illustrations in them.
When there's illustrations and drawings,
I feel like people would hang onto books longer.
Whereas if it was just, oh, there's no pictures...
- Yes. - More likely to be discarded
over 100 or 200 years. - Wow.
- So I'm looking for books that don't
have illustrations in them. - That's an inter--
- No, that's-- I've never heard that.
- I know. This is, like-- it's such an odd nuance.
And now when I find them, I'm getting--
I get excited, and I get them.
Sometimes I think
some of the guys don't like it when I can, like,
quote last week's "Economist" and they can't.
But being well-read, it's a plus.
- And then this one is a collection of three plays.
"King Lear," "Othello," and "Antony and Cleopatra."
- The two hottest things a man can have in his wallet
are Centurion card and a New York Public Library card.
[phone rings]
I'm going to take one call. I'm so sorry.
- Oh, yes. Of course.
- Hello. - Hey.
- What's going on? I'm in a bookstore.
- What are you doing at the bookstore?
- Um, I wanted to drop off a couple books
and get their thoughts.
- Your birthday's coming up, isn't it?
- Yes, it's coming up.
- Like, do you have, like, a birthday lead-up plan?
Are you doing anything in the interim?
- Uh, I'm going to go do the--the tree.
I'm going to go meet with an arborist
from the Central Park Conservancy
and walk around with them.
I gave them a list of approximately
where we would want it.
- The tree should be by some ducks.
Grandma loved ducks, remember?
All she ever talked about was going down to the river--
- And feeding the ducks.
- With a bag of McDonald's, and feeding the ducks.
- I know, right?
[somber music]
It's been a year and a half since Mimi died.
For some time now, I've wanted to
commemorate or memorialize my grandmother's memory
in Central Park.
She was an amazing woman.
I want to do it because I want to have it be more about,
like, look, this is life, and let's--
it's supposed to be celebratory.
She taught me that no one is better than you.
You're not better than anybody else.
She wasn't perfect, but she did her best.
[sniffles]
And her best was more than good enough.
By the time that the plaque is made,
it takes four to six months for the plaque that goes on the--
the walk.
Then it will be summer, so
so long as Central Park is standing, she'll have her tree.
- All right. I really like a couple of these things.
And I'm like--
"The Love Letters of Mark Twain."
- Shut up. It's not a cowboy hat.
Is it? - [laughing]
- Oh God, is it a cowboy hat?
Now I'm gonna have to change my hat.
- Coming up.
- Come on. Show me what you got.
- Okay.
[upbeat music]
* *
- Hello. Welcome. - Hi.
- How are you? - Good. How you doing?
- Good.
- I'm not sure what we're doing.
I'm meeting Ubah, I think. - Yes. She's right upstairs.
You can just take off your shoes,
and leave them right under there.
- Oh, wow. - [gasps]
We're getting some healing, we're getting some healing.
- This is the most energetic I've seen you.
[indistinct chatter]
You smell delicious. Is it-- - You too. [inhales deeply]
- Is that you or here? - No, me.
- It's you. - And here too, a little bit.
- Oh, my God, you really do smell good.
- We should come up with a perfume together.
- Okay. That would be...
- Like, oil or something. - The two of us together.
- This event was inspired by the incident in Anguilla.
- Why are you bringing this up now?
Because she's riling you up? - No! No.
- Be quiet. - Don't tell me what to do.
Don't tell me to be quiet.
I would like to use this event to make it so
all of us can let it go of what happened in Anguilla,
but also even a deeper level of healing
in whatever that they're going through in their lives.
- [gasps] Hi. - Oh.
- Hey, babe. - Hi. Hi.
- This is a healing ceremony.
- It's healing session and a booty class.
Did I tell you that? - You look gorgeous.
- Thank you. Thank you.
I'm--I'm, like, not a child. - Yes, you are.
- I'm a grown-ass woman.
- Yeah, with a perfect ass.
[phone ringing] Oh. Brynn is calling.
What's up, babe? - Aw.
all: Hi.
- What are you doing? Why are you not here?
- Oh, God.
- Seriously?
- Oh, my God, look at how pretty.
- Enjoy.
- Of course this is Ubah's event.
Hi.
- She got COVID.
- Oh, baby, I'm-- - Wait, wait, wait.
- I'm sorry.
- You gotta-- she always bring it.
- [laughs] I'm-- I'm so sad you're not here.
- Alexandra. Nice to meet you, Alexandra.
- You too. Nice to meet you.
- Bye, amor. - Bye.
It smells amazing in here.
- This is where Ubah doesn't yell.
- Okay. - Oh, thank God.
We should come here more often. - [laughs]
- Hi! - Oh!
- Hello. - Hi.
- Welcome to the party.
- I'm so happy Ubah planned this.
I could use a healing experience
after the craziness of Anguilla.
I'm all about it.
- I would like for everybody to put your hand into your heart,
and connect to your heart.
And if there is an intention, it is the time now
for you to really connect to yourself.
And before you start, I would like
for each one to say an intention,
and we're going to take from there.
- My intention is to be more present.
- More present. How about you, darling?
- Uh, my intention is to be more open and less guarded.
- Feel safe to open up.
- My intention is to really stay grounded.
- Truth.
- My intention is to be more patient
and present with my kids. - Wonderful.
- My intention is to
bring all the love that I give outside to myself.
- [laughs] I'm sorry.
I feel like Ubah has so much self-love.
I didn't know she needed more, but great.
- Shake it up. And you can go ha, ha, ha.
And let it go, okay?
I'm going to make sounds that's going to help
everybody to let it go.
- Come on. Show me what you got.
The African in you, let's see it.
[drumming] - [ululating]
* *
[ululating]
- Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!
[drumming] - [ululating]
- It's so calming.
It seems kind of, like, hokey, but it totally works.
- Now everybody can lie down. Make yourself comfortable.
- Take a little nap right now. This is amazing.
[gong resonates]
- Take a moment to feel all your body.
And now I'm going to take everybody through a journey.
I'm going to start to drum.
I'm blessing you. I love you.
You'd like to bring your inner child here and say to her,
you're safe. [chimes resonating]
Jenna, you're safe. - Hi, Jenna. You're safe.
- I came from the future.
Say it. - I came from the future.
- You are free. - You are free.
- Let's start to drop now this resistance.
That is a big wall in front of you.
- [snorting chuckle] - Big wall.
- I don't like it. It's not for me.
[laughs] I don't want to go on a journey
anywhere unless it's, like, you're stamping my passport.
- Your cup overflow with joy,
the same time is a mix with sadness for your mom
not being in a physical presence.
But she's here in spirit.
[Ubah crying]
[flowing dramatic music]
[Ubah sobbing]
- We very rarely see Ubah open up.
I think she's quite a private person.
And I just want to make sure
that she knows that we're there for her.
- For big life, big projects.
- Is it okay that I'm sitting? - And you're done.
Yes. Everybody can sit down.
Yeah. You're done.
- [sighs] - You're done.
- [exhales deeply] - Thank you.
- Thank you so much.
- Thank you. - See you soon.
- Thank you. - Yes.
- That was-- that was really good.
Strong.
- Yeah. - You enjoy, you guys?
- I feel good. She was great.
- It's amazing.
When the drums are going, like, I can actually
find--like, meditate.
I find it so hard.
But with all the drumming, it's like, phew.
- Do you feel like she was, like, talking to a certain--
- Yes.
I was like, I don't really want to cry right now.
So I'm going to-- - No, that's why we're here.
- [muttering indistinctly] [laughs]
- I'm not being healed, because there's nothing wrong with me.
[scoffs] I'm fine.
- We've got food.
- Yay. - Yes, yes, yes, yes!
- Are we not happy that we actually eat?
- Yes, yes. - Wow. Thank you so much.
Anything you can do to get out of your element,
and, like, try something new, I'm down for.
So I liked Alexandra.
I mean, it's a little much with all the--
[mumbles] This whole--
like, that whole thing was, like, a little much.
It went on a little too long for my liking.
But otherwise, I thought it was pleasant.
- By the way, what are you doing Friday?
Are you free? Want to grab lunch?
- Sure, I think so. What time?
- I don't know. I'll text you.
- Okay. Are you going to ambush me or something?
- (BLEEP) yeah. - I don't care to go to lunch.
What could she possibly want to talk about?
All right. Let's gossip. Who has some gossip?
- Let's gossip, gossip.
- Now that I have food, I'm ready to talk to people.
- So I'm having a staycation, finally, with my husband.
- Yay. - Oh, yeah.
- Hallelujah.
- Where are you going to stay? Which hotel? Which hotel?
- We're going to the Ritz-Carlton in NoMad.
- Yes.
- It's like, the newer-- oh, so sick.
- Are you going to have sex? - Yes! (BLEEP) yes.
- Hope so. - Are you kidding me?
I have all these, like, things now.
I have toys, I have a vibrator, I got lube.
- Oh, my God, you're going to have sex.
- I did. I got the good lingerie.
- You're gonna have sex on Thursday.
- I know. I'm going to wear the sexy lingerie.
I have this really cool dress.
I'm going to do a little peekaboo action.
- Have you ever worn anything like that with him before?
- No. I haven't, to be honest.
It's very risqué.
- I'm really excited, and I can't wait to see you after.
- Oh, I know. I'm going to be, like, bouncing off the walls.
- You should make a video. - Oh, yes.
- Should I make a video? Send it to you?
- Please, I want to see it. - Live blog.
- Oh, God.
No, I don't want to see a video.
- I want the video for proof. - [laughs]
- Coming up.
- Is this hookerish enough?
- * Life is a high rise *
* Yes, but that's okay *
[upbeat music]
- Hi. How are you guys? - Hi. Good.
- Hi. Can we have a table for two?
- Yeah, of course. Just follow me back.
- Thank you. I am hungry.
- For sweets. - Yeah.
- Lucky girl.
Take off your jacket and stay a while, darling.
I can't wait to hear about your audition.
- I've just got to get comfortable first.
All right. That's better.
- So what happened? Were you nervous?
- I was on the outside,
and then six girls were on the inside.
And there were three barres.
And then there were two girls per barre.
- Oh, three. Okay.
- Because there wasn't enough room.
So I put my foot behind in ending position.
And then I was like this, and I went, oh.
And then I had to switch my feet.
- Did anybody see you?
- I'm pretty sure someone did, but it's fine.
- I was so nervous. - Kind of.
You were a nervous wreck. - Sorry.
London's a ballerina.
She loves, loves, loves ballet.
Do you know what you want? - Uh...
- But she also wants to be a Broadway actress.
She wants to be a triple threat.
She wants to sing, she wants to dance.
So all she does around the house
is ask me to get her a agent.
- I don't know what macaroon flavors they have.
- Maybe just give her an assortment of, like, five?
- Got it. Yeah, of course.
- I was like, am I not good enough to be your agent?
She's like, "I want to go above and beyond."
I think I need to see my name in lights, Mom.
So if you can't get me there, get me an agent.
That's where I am with my daughter.
I feel like every audition you ever went for, you've gotten.
You're so lucky.
When I was little, I wanted to be a gymnast,
but we didn't have any money, so I--
I would just watch the gymnasts on TV.
And what I would do is
I would run from couch to couch and jump on them.
[laughter]
And then put my hands up like this.
- I did it. - I did a ten.
It's a ten. And I would just pretend.
But I never did, like, classes for a long period of time.
- Yeah.
- Like, I always wanted to do classes and do those things.
Maybe I'm, like, living vicariously through you.
Mommy lived a completely different lifestyle.
My first vacation trip, I was in college, I think.
- ASMR. [wrapper crinkling]
- Meanwhile, you and Rio get to go everywhere.
Not growing up with much,
and then being able to provide that access to my kids
just makes me very, very proud as a person.
Oh, I'm thinking about having Aunt Sofia fly out
next week to hang out for--
- She was supposed to come before, right?
- Yeah. We'll probably do some cooking.
We'll eat some rice and beans that she makes.
- Arroz con gandules.
- This will be the strawberry shortcake.
- Yum.
- And your five macarons. - Thank you.
- Thank you so much.
- Let us know if you'd like anything else.
- Actually, I'm just going to eat this one,
and then save these two. - Yeah, that's a good idea.
Uh, you didn't ask me about my trip, by the way.
You don't even notice I was gone.
- I did.
- I have to be honest--
- Two days ago, I thought you were still on your trip.
- Thanks a lot.
[upbeat music]
Mommy's friends are so crazy. I'm so happy to be back.
[British accent] We have got to do this
every weekend, darling.
* *
- * New York *
* City never sleeps *
* New York *
* Better move these streets *
- Hey, P? - Yep?
- Oh. You got the good stuff.
- You ready for some champagne? - Hells yeah.
- All right.
- I'm so getting liquored up tonight.
- We got a lot of things on the agenda for today.
- Really?
- Some nice, fancy dining, potentially Michelin-star.
- Yeah. But it's not, like, a stuffy place, right?
- No, it's not stuffy. - Okay, good.
- I prefer the one-stars, anyways.
- Fine. So I'm not worth three stars.
- You're not worth three stars. - Cheers.
- Oh, cheers.
- Happy non-anniversary date night.
Oh, happy sex-iversary.
[whimsical music]
- Is that a thing? - [laughing] Yeah.
- Cheers, anyways. - [laughs]
What I'm going through is not new news.
We are in a rut, and it's normal.
It's not a scandal.
So Brynn--[laughs]
Helped me pick out some things for you.
- Interesting.
- So I think wearing something sexy underneath your outfit...
- Yeah.
- Maybe it's crotchless panties.
- What?
- It's crotchless, but you can kind of, like--
- Oh. - They look regular.
- Yeah.
- But then, see, it's like there's a hole right there.
- Oh, my God, I just saw your cooch.
This, my friend, is dessert.
- Can we have real dessert, to-go, too?
- Yeah, you can have real dessert.
- [laughs]
- I have more things too,
but I'm going to leave that as a surprise.
If Brynn was in my ear right now,
she would literally be like, okay.
You have to, like--[laughs] Oh, God.
Like, literally cowgirl him like this.
- Whoa. Okay.
- And then she would be like, you have to, like,
lick him like that.
- What the hell is happening here?
I think I need more champagne. - [laughs]
* *
When was the last time we even, like, got to do this?
- We haven't been out on a date in a long time.
I've been paying this married with kids tax
for almost two years now.
So it's about time I get my refund.
- There's a little, uh, slit.
If I need to use the bathroom,
I don't actually have to take it off.
- That's a selling point, huh?
You should try it on for me.
- I don't even know if I'm going to fit into this.
Let's see.
[quirky suspenseful music]
- "Whisper-quiet."
- I mean, is this hookerish enough?
- [laughs] Wear that to dinner. - [laughs]
- I think this is a great outfit.
[laughs] Tell them it's, like, the newest designer.
- Can you imagine? I would die.
- Coming up.
- Your story is your story.
Our stories are completely different.
[upbeat music]
* *
[jazzy big band music]
* *
- Ooh, Lord! That's hot as (BLEEP).
* *
[computer chiming]
That's Brynn.
Hola! [Brynn laughs]
How are you feeling, my love?
- I actually still feel okay. Thank you for asking.
Um, and now I'm just coughing--
I'm finally coughing up the phlegm
that's been in there since Anguilla.
[coughing]
- Can you get COVID through the phone?
- No, baby. [Ubah laughs]
Will you do me a favor? Do my favorite thing?
Will you make a-- yeah, a soap beard?
- I don't know if I know how to do well.
Oh, I miss you yesterday. - Right.
- I just felt so, like, this is good.
This--this--this is why we're friends.
Like, you know, we do each other's sh--
that we don't really, like, understand.
And they embrace it, and they are very open.
It was just so beautiful.
I think it's something my mom will be so proud.
- Yes.
- Like, I'm bringing girls together.
She's all about the women are the community.
- Powerful women.
And being a powerful woman while still being a kind,
loving woman, right? - Yeah.
Relationship with your friends.
And it was beautiful.
It was--I really wish you were there.
And then also, Jessel, she's having a staycation.
- I know. She told me. - At the Ritz.
- We should send them, like, a stripper and lube.
- [gasps] Do you think they're going to do it?
- I could see them just getting, like, hammered.
- That's what they did in Mykonos.
She said, "We got hammered every day."
- We should get-- we should get matching, like,
housekeeping outfits like Ritz-Carlton housekeeping.
And we should, like, show up. Knock, knock, knock.
- Brynn, Brynn, you have COVID.
I'm calling the health department if you leave.
We're not going anywhere with you for the next five days.
[upbeat music]
* *
- Okay. I'll keep you posted. All right. Bye.
* *
How are you?
Table for two, please. Thank you.
- All right. Right this way.
* *
Do we know what we'd like to drink yet?
- Maybe I'll try this.
- The Ghia spritz? - Yeah.
I'll get that right out.
- Okay, great. Thank you. - Yeah.
[indistinct chatter]
[dramatic music]
* *
I don't know where my friend is.
- I'm sure she'll show up, right?
- You know what? Can I order? - Yeah, of course.
- I'll do the wild rice bowl. - Okay.
- Thank you so much. I appreciate it.
* *
You don't even have the decency to call me
and tell me you're late to a lunch that you invited me to
that I never wanted to come to in the first place.
I'm a little pissed off.
[indistinct chatter]
* *
- Hey, welcome. - Hi.
- Welcome to Champers. - I'm meeting--there she is.
I see her. I'm late. She's going to be mad at me.
So mad at me. - I'm so annoyed.
- I'm sorry about that. - I'm just sitting here.
- Oh, my God. Did you at least get a drink?
- I'm not drinking in the middle of the day.
- No? I'm so sorry. - I have so much work to do.
- I was in the car for, like, 40 ----ing minutes today.
- Why did you pick this place, then?
- I thought it was going to be convenient for you.
Are you shooting today? - Yeah.
- I'm sorry. - I'm frazzled.
- I'm sorry.
This was supposed to be a fun, relaxing lunch situation.
- I mean, I feel like if we're going to do relaxing,
can we do it on a weekend?
- Well, this is the weekend to me.
Friday, honey.
- Friday is a work day, Jessel.
- I start my weekend on Friday.
- Oh, thank you. I'm starving. - Here's the mushroom bowl.
- Thank you.
- That looks amazing. - This looks great.
- Olives are right here as well.
- Thank you.
Can I get you something to drink?
- You're not drinking, right? - No.
- Okay. Um, I'm not going to drink by myself.
So can I just get a sparkling water with lemon?
- Of course. - And whatever she's having.
- All right, sounds good. - Thank you so much.
- You're welcome. - You want olives?
- Yeah. I love olives.
- Well, what's up? What's going on?
- What's going on?
I had my date night last night.
* *
- Oh. How did it go?
- Well, I'm no longer a born-again virgin,
put it that way.
- Was it awkward?
- Honestly, it took me, like, 20 minutes to, like, loosen up.
Dude, it's been a year and a half.
It's like the Mojave Desert down there right now.
- A year and a half sounds insane to me.
- I know someone that hadn't done it for four years. Like--
- And their husband is ----ing someone else.
- Totally. - Or they are.
- Totally.
To me and him, it wasn't a priority.
- I'm sorry. I do not believe that her and Pavit had sex.
There's zero detail.
And I think Jessel is just so sick of us
asking if she has actually sealed the deal
that she's lying.
So you told me he's going to Vietnam.
What does he go to Vietnam for?
- He's going to Vietnam in a couple of weeks.
And so I'm, like, really happy that he--
he planned this before that.
He kind of does this, like, mileage run.
Why is that funny?
What? [laughs]
- He's going to Vietnam for miles?
- Yeah, yeah. He likes to do that.
- Okay. So he does this frequently?
- He does it frequently. He's doing his thing.
So anyway. - Got it.
Your man goes to Vietnam for what?
There's so many questions running through my mind
that I can't-- I'm just blank face.
Just blank.
- Look. After Anguilla, when we were at dinner
and you were asking me the questions about my uncle
and, like, the whole thing--
- What did you do for work when you were with your, um, uncle?
- I was interning. - So what did you do for money?
That's what I'm saying. - Oh, my God.
I mean, I was living off of savings.
I basically was living with him for free.
But it was, like, ----ing tough.
It felt to me like you thought
I was comparing myself to how you grew up.
I wanted to make sure that you understood that
that's not what I was trying to do.
I don't think it touched any of your guys' struggles.
But I wanted to, I guess, apologize
if that's how it came across.
[indistinct chatter]
- Jessel, to be honest with you, I really don't care.
[tense music]
- Even now, you don't care. Like, I'm trying to explain.
- I don't.
- Because I didn't want you to think that
I was offending you in any way by my story.
- I'm not offended. - Okay. That's it.
- Okay.
- I just wanted to make sure that we were good.
- You could have phoned me for that one, to be honest.
- [laughs] Come on. I wanted to see your face.
- I think the one thing about this group is that we all know
when someone is not being straightforward.
- Right.
- I think we feel offended when someone tells us a story,
and we know that there's some sh-- missing from the story.
- Sure. Fine.
- So--and I think we all get very offensive,
and we're all just kind of like,
well, I'm going to call you out,
because this is not making sense.
And I know I can come off very abrasive, which I apologize.
I know that I'm like that.
But I just--I genuinely am just, like, curious.
Like, I just want to know.
- I want to open up to you guys,
and I want to share, like, who I am.
But like, I just feel like--
now it's like I'm nervous, because--
and I'm ----ing scared to even share stuff with you guys.
Because it's just like-- it doesn't even--
- It's not that.
Again, it's just the straightforwardness
is what we want.
- [sighs]
- We don't want the circle story.
Just got to own it, Jessel. Just own this [bleep].
Have you noticed when you just own it,
no one really messes with you? - Yeah.
- That's the key here. - I know.
We're just not seeing eye-to-eye.
Did I expect, like, the cold reception?
No.
Look.
The other thing that kind of really hit home with me
was when you were telling your story about your mom.
- Mm.
- It really hit home, because I also had,
like, a similar situation, right?
And I--
- What do you mean, a similar situation?
- So my mom has two brothers.
Um, I lived with one in New York,
and I worked with the other.
The one I was living with, Uncle Nitin,
he was an alcoholic.
I blame myself every day
because I don't think I helped him.
- Oh, I'm so sorry. - So he--he passed away.
- I didn't know that. - Yeah.
But just to connect the dots, like,
it's hard for me to talk about
that period of New York, you know?
- I'm sorry. Don't cry. - No, no. I'm not going to cry.
I don't want to cry.
- Little dramatic.
You just apologized for trying to compare,
and then you turn around
and you have this story about your uncle,
and it came out because of my mom?
What's happening?
Babe, it's apples and oranges with my story.
Let's not do this. Let's just please make it stop.
- I just--
I felt disrespected when I was trying to tell the story.
It's hard for me to talk about myself as it is.
And I guess that's why,
you know, maybe I do go around in circles.
Because like, I don't come from a family that's, like--
that openly talks about this sh--.
And every single time I do that, it's just--
it feels like you and Erin just constantly are like vultures,
just tearing apart my story.
- Because the story, Jessel,
sometimes, I wish you would be more vulnerable,
so when we're trying to get to know you.
And one minute you're at A and then one hour later,
you've made a stop at C.
I'm like, I don't know when the story--where--where are we?
I don't want to talk about my mom again,
and I don't want to talk about the reason
why you're only spilling this because of my mom.
It was so hard for me to actually open up
about something like this.
We all know I'm not sentimental.
I'm done.
Your story is your story.
Our stories are completely different.
I love you, but-- - Seriously?
- I got to go. Check?
- Why don't you run and I'll get it?
- Are you sure? - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Okay. All right.
Have a great Friday. - Bye, babe.
- You can do boozy now. - Yeah, now I can drink.
- Okay. Bye. - Bye.
- I waited for you for 45 minutes
for you to tell me you're not comparing yourself,
and then now you drop this story?
I just want to leave.
* *
- Next time on "The Real Housewives of New York City."
[camera shutter clicks] - Gorgeous.
- How many guys did you already turn down?
- I want to wait until the 13, midnight.
- You're like, "You still have a chance till 11:59 p.m."
- Uh-huh.
- Oh, my God. I got to tell you
about this lunch that I went on with Jessel.
It was so ----ing awkward.
Do you know her husband is going to Vietnam for 24 hours?
- That's bizarre.
- Lots can happen in 24 hours. Can't it, Pavit?
- What would you say
if I was just flying to Vietnam repeatedly?
- Who the (BLEEP) are you ----ing?
- [laughing] Oh!
- I seriously am, like, so over this mean girl sh--.
And it is mean girl sh--.
- I didn't even want to be at the lunch.
I don't want to be at this lunch.
It's a waste of my ----ing time.
- Why did you come? - Because I was being nice.
- You want to help her? [laughs]
- Let's be done. Let's be done. I'm out.
- I am done. - ----ing bitch. Diva.
- Her energy towards me was just very cold.
She called me prude. She called me a diva. Like--
- Is she a diva? - Jess? No.
Is Sai bipolar? Yes. - [laughs]
- Oh. - [laughs]