- Previously this season
on "The Real Housewives of New York City"...
- I'm gonna go meet with an arborist
from the Central Park Conservancy.
- I am ----ing guarded.
I have been ----ed so many times.
Like, if that comes off as not wanting to participate,
or not wanting to try, or not wanting to be a friend,
like, I apologize. That's not my intention at all.
- Get out of my face. - I did not say your name.
Take these glasses when you're talking to me, first of all.
- Excuse me? Do not grab me.
I want to know more about you.
Your story is about your parents coming from Kenya.
That's great-- - Is that not part of my story?
- No, we want to know about you!
- This is what happened. She's your ----ing pet parrot.
- I'm actually so ----ing over you.
- Yeah, well, I've been over you too.
- Let's just be done. Let's be done.
I'm out. - I am done.
- ----ing bitch.
- How people treat you is a direct reflection
of what you've given them permission to do.
So that's not the-- it's not the end of it.
- You know, she called me prude.
She called me a diva. Like-- - Is she a diva?
- Jess, no. Is Sai bipolar? Yes.
- [laughs] - Ooh.
- [chuckles]
[upbeat music]
- The secret ingredient?
Darling, it's me.
- My lashes may be fake,
but I definitely keep it real.
- I'm a true New Yorker.
The only bull I'll take is by the horns.
- I always bring the flavor.
It's not my fault you don't have any taste.
- In New York, there's a lot of bad apples,
but I'm the baddest of the bunch.
- I love to laugh, but make me mad,
and I'll date your dad.
* *
- * I do it real big *
* I do it *
* I do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it *
- This mannequin scared the sh-- out of me.
I thought it was a real person.
Can I see this wig?
* *
I can get away with that.
She's a babe. She's a babe, right?
- Yeah, that's cute.
- * Let's go *
* I do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it *
- Pile number eight, top card or bottom?
- Bottom.
- You might be caught in the middle of someone's issues,
like two friends that are not getting along,
and you're friends with both of them.
- Is it gonna get resolved before this Saturday,
because I'm having a birthday party,
and I'm inviting both of them.
- Balancing is you in the power position.
So maybe you're, like, "Look, people, it's my birthday.
Let's call a truce and have fun."
- Yeah, yeah.
- * I do it big like a skyscraper *
* I do it big, baby, I do it big, baby *
- Oh, gorgeous girl. Gorgeous.
Where's the wind machine?
[groans] This is what I like to see.
- Heads are closer together. Thank you.
- Gorgeous.
Stare, I love that with the teeth, oh.
* *
- There she is.
- Yalla! - You look gorgeous.
- I love your shoes. - Thank you.
- I'm so happy we're doing this.
- Me too.
* *
- I'm so excited.
* *
- Whoa!
You ready to get bumped?
[laughter]
Now is the time for Ubah and I
to have some fun together. - Whoo! Whoo!
- Sorry!
- Not with our hands, but with our bumper cars,
like adults do.
- You're going down. That's it. That's it!
This is ----ing amazing.
I actually like to do the donut.
[screams]
I love bumper cars so much, I usually get kicked out.
Whoo!
My nieces will go in, and the guy will be like,
"No, you can't come in. Last week you were really bad."
And I was like...
Erin, let's be a team.
- OK, who's our next one?
- Let's take 12.
- OK, go, go, go. - OK.
- I got you. I'm with you.
I have a straight shot. - Go on!
Go! Go on! Go on!
- This is the Erin that I love.
This was awesome.
- That was fun. - Right?
Not there arguing in Anguilla.
This is what Erin and I are meant--
to look pretty and have fun.
- Want to have some coffee or something?
- Yes, I would love that so much.
- And eat at the same time.
- Thank you so much. - Appreciate you.
- The trick of this thing is to go in circle.
And then nobody comes next to you.
- Yeah, everyone was like, "Whoa."
- Nobody goes in a tornado.
Thank you for making this so much fun.
- You know what?
We had so much fun the other night.
- It's just me and you talking right now.
She's talking to Ubah.
- I'm sitting here with you.
I'm sitting with you.
Let's keep it going.
Let's keep it moving. We were so happy.
I just felt a little bad about Pavit.
- Oh, you went on him a little about his traveling
and points. Like, who does that?
And I think you guys, because his answer was not--
- She lets me do what I want.
- I just want to travel, eat, have fun, and do whatever,
and it's being able to do what you love
with someone else, she's the perfect partner
for that. - Wow.
- It's your opportunity to say something nice
about your wife in front of all these--
like, she's amazing. She's a lovely mother.
- Personally, in my own weird way,
I think that was the most loving thing
someone could say to someone.
Like, I love this person because he's--
she's letting me be me. - I don't know.
It's just like out-- not common.
- I want a man who's gonna keep up with my sh--.
- Right. - Who's gonna take my sh--?
Like, I'm waiting for someone who's gonna take my sh--,
and then I'm gonna love them so much.
Another thing.
When I come to her event...
- He did? - Why you're not married.
- Oh, I--I heard that. - Why you not married?
- Ubah, one sec. I'm confused.
You are confident, you are smart,
you're a business woman.
Why are you not in a serious relationship?
- I don't know.
Why don't we all close our eyes and speak
to God in your own language.
I didn't find my Abe, I didn't find my Pavit,
I didn't find my David.
Once I do, maybe I might change my mind...
- Right.
- And it will be Ubah Ha tie the knot.
But right now... - I like that!
- I'm happy being me. - Yeah, yeah.
- You know what I mean? - Yeah.
- At some point, I know for sure
I'll be ready to, like, share with the world
and my friends and family him,
but the only person who knows about my person is Sai.
- No, I'm good. I don't need anything else.
- Who is that? - I'm good.
If I told Erin about this, everyone and their mother
and their children will know.
- I really hope that Jessel and Sai
can be, like, good again. - Yeah.
- But can I be honest with you? - Yeah.
- Jessel, she--sometimes she just gets in the roundabout.
- We call it "around the bush" in Africa.
- She gets in around the bush.
She goes around, goes around. - Well, we're in Manhattan.
There's no bush here. - [laughs]
* *
- Hi. - Hello.
Did you just walk into Dior's...
- Yeah, I had a meeting earlier,
so I just came in my Parisian look.
You look really cute.
I like this little bra thing you have going on.
- You know what?
I'm one year older, none the wiser,
so I'm just gonna-- - Yeah.
- Titties out every day this year.
- I like your titties out. - That's the goal.
- It looks good, but I'm freezing.
I'm not gonna have my titties out.
- I haven't been to Central Park in forever.
- Now, every time I come to Central Park,
all I think is is this where Ubah had sex.
Is that where Ubah had sex? Is that where Ubah had sex?
Like, where? - I forgot about that.
- You had sex in Central Park? - Yes.
- Where in Central Park?
- We're not gonna get into detail.
- Unlike Ubah, I have never bang banged it out
in Central Park.
Yeah, I didn't do doggy style there.
I just took my dog.
- Did I ever tell you that story about how my mom
used to make me sell incense? - Yeah.
- And it was-- it was at Central Park.
- Did you bring some in your Dior bag?
- I, like, should have brought some incense.
- So are we gonna peddle? Do you want me to help?
- It's so embarrassing.
And then she, like, wrapped it in foil.
My mom loved Central Park.
She grew up in Central Park.
She loved the congas.
She loved rollerblading.
I had to go running around. Like, excuse me. Hi.
Would you like to buy some incense?
I was 15, and it was mortifying.
I don't even remember if I sold any.
I think I was probably the worst salesman
for incense ever.
I think I might have hid under a tree for a while,
and then told her, like, I didn't get any sales today.
- Thank you for coming.
So what we're gonna do is,
through a Central Park Conservancy
you can endow a tree.
So you can do benches for a donation.
Then you own, for example this bench, theoretically.
- Oh, that's cool.
- So I'm gonna endow a tree.
- And you're doing this for? - For Mimi. Yeah.
- Oh, that's gonna be so nice. - Yeah.
Since losing my grandmother a year and a half ago,
I've just been almost fixated on wanting
to do something special for her,
but here in New York,
and it probably has something to do with the fact
that, growing up, she ad nauseam
would talk about the one time
that she traveled to Central Park.
She loved me living here.
- It's really, really a nice thing.
- Now there's gonna be a permanent living thing
in her honor.
- I want it to be closer to the pond.
One of the things that my grandma would do
in Indiana, she loved ducks.
Like, Mimi, what are you doing?
She's like, "Oh, I'm just gonna go feed the ducks."
you know, like this is--
- Oh, that's really sweet, though.
- I'm like--hi. - Hi.
How are you? - Good to meet you. Excellent.
Brynn Whitfield. - Hi, Brynn, I'm Stormy.
- Hi, Sai. Nice to meet you, Alan.
- Sai, nice to meet you.
Welcome to the endowment process.
- We're excited about this. - Yeah.
- Today we're gonna look at tree specimens
to choose from. - OK.
- There's this really cool thing
that we work with. That's our data system.
All the purple trees are available.
- That's so cool. - OK.
- Yeah.
you want to take a walk?
So yeah, as you can see, if we sit on a bench
anywhere around here, all those trees
on the other side are available.
- Gorgeous. OK.
- This is a willow with the yellow--
- She loved weeping willows. Is that available?
- Yeah, that's what that is, that yellow one.
Yes, it's available. - [gasp]
Oh, my God.
And then look, a duck just went by.
- Ah. [laughs]
- There's a bench right underneath it.
- Yep, there is. - Oh!
- And right next to that is-- - I think she loves it.
- Oh, wonderful.
[tender music]
- Let's go walk over to it.
- It's sweet when you said there's ducks going by.
That was sweet. Thank you.
- I understand what Brynn is going through a lot
because I've been through a lot of the things
that she went through.
Obviously, two different situations,
but she's like a little sister to me.
We have a very, very close relationship,
and I don't think that it can be
explained to the other people in our friend group.
- Aw! OK. Yeah, that's it.
I love it. It's perfect.
Wait! Have you ever hugged a tree?
It's the best feeling ever.
- I agree fullheartedly.
- They're living things. - They really are.
- Oh, my God. This is nice!
I love it. - It's beautiful.
- All right. Turn around.
[camera clicks]
- Oh, I'm happy.
Thank you guys so much.
- I'm so happy this worked out for you.
- I'm so happy. - Thank you.
- Now there's a nice memorial, a little piece
of New York for Mimi.
- I'm glad you did this. - Yeah, thank you for coming.
- Of course, I'm happy to be here for you.
- Coming up...
- That is her business. That is her story to tell.
You don't ----ing do that. - We didn't even try do this.
- (BLEEP) you, Brynn.
- * I'm getting freaky *
* Yeah, I'm a freaky person *
* Get that freaky, freaky on *
* Freaky, get it right, get it right *
* Set that freaky, freaky on *
- OK, how is this real?
Of course the model's drinking green juice.
You're so cliché.
[laughter]
You're almost done with the hair and makeup, right?
- Oh, yeah. - OK, perfect.
Ah, you look amazing.
I am shooting the first campaign
for my newest venture, an e-commerce platform
bringing ready-to-wear and accessories
coming out of India and the Middle East.
Jenna Lyons. - How's it going?
- I'm good. [laughs]
What is happening over here?
- My friend is on a photo shoot with Naomi Campbell,
and they said that they would give them lashes,
so I'm making boxes. - Wait.
You do this yourself? - Yeah, just you wait.
You're gonna be doing a lot of stuff yourself too,
my love. - All right, listen.
I am all for it.
I feel like I've taken over your home.
- Oh, no. It's OK.
It's not-- it's not the first time--
- Over the last nine years, I've probably had
50 some odd photo shoots in my apartment.
- I want a--I need some eyelashes for the shoot.
- Oh, what level of drama would you like?
- Jessel asked,
and if I can help her out or help anyone out,
I'm game.
I have been supported and helped by other women,
and I think it's important. - Should we start? Let's go.
- Yeah. - You're ready?
- It's so good.
See? Do you see how that--
I think it's just perfect. - Yeah.
Beautiful.
- How's it going? - It's going really good?
- You have to come and see some of these frocks.
- Oh, I do want to see. OK.
- So I wanted to do Indian, but in, like, Western settings.
So, like, not traditional at all.
- Can I--
I'm just gonna-- - Yeah, please.
- I just think you want to--
like, you might want to move stuff
just so that it doesn't feel-- - Cluttered?
- Looks a little junk, like-- Yeah.
- Jenna is a perfectionist,
and if I had enough money, I would hire her
to creatively direct this shoot.
- You don't want that in your ----ing shot, man.
Like, that is hard.
You don't want that in your shot.
You don't want this in your shot.
- But guess what?
I cannot afford Jenna Lyons.
So to have her come and tweak things,
I'm all ears. - That's better. Anyway.
- Yeah, it does look better. Thank you.
- Now you're on your own. Sorry.
[camera clicking]
- That's really cool.
It's giving, like, Serengeti, like tribal,
but like well-read.
- Well read.
- Oh, my God.
That was me, like, popping jokes and, like, dying.
- I've packed all my boxes, and I just realized
that I have--I don't have any glue in the house.
I have to go get glue. - Oh, no.
[phone rings]
Oh. - Amore.
- Amore, where are you?
- The elevator is not working.
- So Jenna's elevator is being worked on.
You have to walk up, like, a thousand staircases.
I'm so sorry. - Don't worry.
- Think about your ass workout.
Think about your-- oh, she hung up.
[upbeat music]
- How's it looking? - It's sick.
- Yeah? - Sick, sick, sick.
It's so good. - Hi.
- What the (BLEEP)? Can I get you a water?
- I'm good. - Mwah.
- Oh, my God. - Wow.
- Jessel, you didn't tell me I'm climbing Kilimanjaro.
- I'm so sorry.
But you-- I knew that you could do it.
- I would not have worn heels
if I knew this elevator is broken.
But you know, you do things for friends.
And you sound so sexy.
- I lost my voice, and it just happened.
- No way.
- I haven't been sucking dick or anything.
I don't know what happened. - OK, Brynn.
- I invited Ubah because she was a model.
She gives great advice.
In fact, she's my biggest cheerleader.
I love her.
I knew you'd see the fashion.
- I think we should see more of her waist.
- Yeah, let's give a little bit more.
You've got those abs, baby girl.
- Let's see when she changes, yes.
I think that seat is gonna work.
- Oh, my God, yeah.
- That's nice. - Oh, la. Oh, la, la.
- I think we got it. - Yeah?
- You are stunning.
Stunning, stunning, stunning. - She is.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Can we talk about this bathtub? - Yeah.
- I am obsessed.
- [laughs]
- How have you been?
- I haven't spoken to you,
but Brynn and Jenna came over on Friday.
Anyway, Brynn is telling me about all this sh--
that, like, Erin and Sai are saying about my marriage.
- You Know what Erin told me? - Mm.
- She was like, "Oh, my God, Ubah asked
"the cutest question, and went around
and asked, like, 'How did you meet the person you loved?'"
- Oh, no, why you love... - Yeah.
- Your wife. - Yeah.
And Erin was like "What Pavit said
"was like, 'I like Jessel because
she lets me do what I want.'"
- That's exactly not what he said.
- She's like, "It was so weird. He wasn't wearing his ring."
And she's like, "I don't know what's going on."
- Whoa. - What the (BLEEP)?
- Do they think a wedding ring stop a man from cheating?
- It... - Literally...
- Is... - You do this...
- The dumbest comment.
- And you put it in your pocket.
And voilà, you do whatever the (BLEEP)--
Also, men get hitted on more statistically...
- With a wedding ring. - With a wedding ring.
- That's exactly what Pavit said.
Did you guys talk? Like-- - No, but that's the truth.
- He literally said the same thing.
- No, that's the truth.
- They're, like, trying to poke holes in my marriage.
But that--like, I'm sorry. I was here.
This is the edge. I'm down here now.
You don't talk about my husband.
- I think that's off limits. - It is off limit.
I'm sorry. It is off limit.
- Personally, I don't get into people marriage.
I don't get into people children.
It's none of my business, and it shouldn't be.
Weak people fight that way.
- For Brynn birthday... - Yes.
- Are you planning to speak to them in Brynn's birthday--
- I don't know what I'm gonna do yet.
You know, if I address it, it's gonna be short.
It's gonna be sweet. 1, 2, 3, exit.
- OK.
[quirky music]
* *
- [screams]
- That scared the sh-- out of me.
So I'm waiting for my friend to come in.
I would love to, like, really do this to her.
- Yeah, we can do that. - OK.
Thanks for the scare. - Yeah.
- Appreciate it. - Any time.
* *
[animatronic creature roars] - [imitates scream]
Ew! what the hell is that?
- [laughs] You look so cute.
- You look so cute. Hi. - Hi.
- I love this place.
- So the guy was telling me that the masks
are in the back.
- OK. - What are you wearing?
Do you know? - No clue.
- Brynn is having a party.
Venetian masks are recommended.
- What can I help you guys with?
- We're looking for Venetian masks.
- If you want more the classic one,
we have the nice long nose.
- I've never been to a masquerade,
but I always wanted to go to one.
I only think of "Eyes Wide Shut,"
and I'm also with my swinger friends,
so what could we be getting into?
- This one's cool. - Ooh, wait.
I like this.
- This is just for funsies. - Oh, my God.
- You're here. Try it out.
Come on. - Please, please, please.
- [hums melody]
[laughter]
OK, I think I'm gonna get the black one and this one.
So these two.
- Which was your selection, again?
- These two. - These two right here.
- Yeah. - OK, great.
I'll bring these up to the front, OK?
Please take a look around more if you wish.
- I haven't seen you since the Swingers debacle.
- That was crazy.
- I was annoyed then, and I'm just
still annoyed by Jessel. - Yeah.
- I seriously am like so over this mean girl sh--.
- No one's being a mean girl. - Yes, you are.
- Jessel, you make no sense when you speak.
- And then she called you a pet parrot.
- Oh, I don't like that.
I didn't know she called me a pet parrot.
- But you were talking to Ubah.
And I was like, "Well, my pet parrot's
not even listening right now."
- She called me a ----ing pet parrot?
- She called you a pet parrot. - Ew!
I don't care because it's just not true.
So I'm not offended.
Pet parrot? I want to drop kick her.
She's the parrot.
She can't even remember her own thoughts.
She writes all the thoughts down in a notebook.
It's just the dumbest thing I've ever heard.
- When she called me mean girl, like,
that's when I got up and walked away
and called her a ----ing bitch. - Yeah, that's not cool.
- And I'm like, "It's not that I'm being mean."
Yes, I'm a little bit abrasive. Yes, I'm very straightforward.
I could work on that. - Mm-hmm.
- But all of a sudden, you're a mean girl.
You're a mean girl.
And I was like, "This is pointless."
- And we're all very direct, very honest.
- Very honest.
- So it's hard with people like that.
I will tell you one thing.
I went with Ubah to bumper cars on ice.
Honestly, I had a really good time.
Like-- - Oh, that's nice.
- Yeah, it was good.
But one thing that I wanted to tell you,
and it's not the biggest deal, but I don't know if you want
to bring it up with David and--
but she brought up how he said, like, "Why are you single?"
And she was just saying how people shouldn't ask that.
Like, would anyone ask a man that?
- I think he was saying it in a way that was, like,
you are the full package.
I can't believe no one has scooped you up yet.
- Right.
- How could she be offended by David?
David would hurt no one, and he loves my friends.
All he does is compliment my friends--
compliments my friends so much that I'm like,
"Hello. Hello. I'm your wife. What about me?"
- I think she was offended, though.
It obviously was something for her.
Just food for thought. - OK.
But she's fine.
She's very happy.
She's in a good place.
- She's in a good place. I mean, she's dating someone.
- Who is she dating? - It's none of your business.
That was like a locked vault. I accidentally found out,
and so-- - She didn't tell you?
- She was show--she was--
mi amor, showing me a photo,
and there were some photos there.
And I said, "Oh." And then she told me.
- Is he cute? How do you know who it is?
- She just told me it's someone she's dating.
- OK, cute.
- And she said to me, "Please keep this between us."
- You are the only one who knows this.
- Won't say a word. - OK.
- I just didn't know if it was like public knowledge
or not. - No, it's not.
I'm even upset with myself that I even said this much.
Like, that is her personal business.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And like that's...
- Totally. - That's that.
- No, I'm happy for her. That's so good.
It bothers me a bit that Sai knows Ubah's dating someone
before I do, considering I'm much closer with Ubah,
or I had been.
You know, we had a great day in Bryant Park,
but I think we're both treading lightly right now,
but it doesn't mean that it doesn't sting.
- I think that she's perfectly--
like, she's very happy, and I don't--
I shouldn't be out here, like,
telling someone else's business.
- So nobody knows? - I don't think so.
- As soon as Erin asked me who she's dating,
immediately I wanted to retract
the entire statement. Just kidding!
I'm just kidding. She's not seeing anyone.
That was a joke. Just a joke.
- Ubah's gonna come for my head.
I'm not trying to piss her off. And you know what?
She's my friend.
She told me something that I shouldn't have said.
I felt awful.
I felt awful for saying something.
I think we'll go out. We'll have fun.
We'll ignore Jessel, and life goes on.
While we're at it, we should dress you up
like a parrot.
- And then you could just say things,
like, funny things, like, "Shut up, Jessel."
- Shut up, Jessel. Take that Jessel!
[together] Take that Jessel!
[laughter]
[upbeat music]
* *
- I'm going to this party today.
It's Brynn's birthday, so I could do this.
- Green's nice, yeah. - Right?
With like very beautiful shoes,
and just like shiny.
Or I have not wore this Zang Toi in so long.
- But it's not your birthday. - It's Brynn.
I don't think she's gonna care.
What do you think? - Yeah.
That was fast.
Usually you pick things, like, last, last minute.
- But that's when you pick the best clothes though, right?
* *
- Let me fix your hair, actually, before tonight.
So I want to also see what you're wearing.
Do you have it, like, worked out?
- We have to wear tuxes, right?
- Do you know if you're gonna do,
like, bow tie or no bow tie?
- Of course, I'm gonna do a bow tie.
- You are, of course?
- Who wears a tux without a bow tie?
- I don't know. You could do that.
- Big weirdos.
- I feel like you could do that.
- You could.
It doesn't mean you should. - OK.
* *
- So now I'm screwed.
I actually have no idea what I'm gonna wear.
What do you think of this?
I wore this to the Met Ball years ago.
It's white.
Those little pants, and then there's a top.
- My only issue is the mask is really solid.
That is really transparent. - I know.
- It'll feel weird. - I actually agree with you.
- You know, you know, you know, you know,
can we do something with this?
- I don't know if it's dressy enough.
I don't know what I'd wear with it.
OK. - Why--why is it--
- OK, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Beckett's funny. He's deeply smart.
- I'm sorry.
I don't know if I can approve of that.
- He's also an amazing dresser and has tons of swagger.
- What do you think of this?
- What am I looking at? - It's a jumpsuit.
It just looks like a trouser.
- That looks really wacky.
- Wacky? - I don't know.
- It's Celine. - I love you.
- Wow, you're really leaving me.
[laughs]
- I don't know how I'm gonna go to a party
and not talk because I have, like, zero voice.
Do you think I sound kind of sexy, though?
- Uh... [laughs]
Do I have to answer that?
- Pavit, I leave you for, like, an hour,
and this place, like, blew up. - It looks great.
Got a nice ball pit. [laughs]
- I think my body's shutting down.
I'm like--
- Oh, you've got a big party tonight.
- I only genuinely want to have a good time.
I don't want to deal with, like, this negativity.
- So what about Erin? - I mean, I feel the same way.
She does not need to talk about my marriage.
She can literally sit in her sad little Tribeca corner
and, like, fixate on, like, our lives.
Like, good for you. She's ----ing obsessed.
It's like Eminem "Stan" right now.
Like, crazy Looney Tune.
She's a ----ing parrot. She has no brain.
I mean, she doesn't have the capacity
to think for herself. OK?
- Should I just walk in with, like,
5, 10 rings on my fingers? - No.
I think you're good.
I don't need to make a ----ing statement.
They're so obsessed with me.
Like, I can't focus as much on other people's lives.
- I'm not sure why Erin and Sai are causing issues.
Are they projecting that they're not happy
with their marriage onto us, who are very happily married?
Perhaps.
So how are you feeling about Sai De right now?
- I'm so over it, I literally don't care.
- OK. So when you see her tonight, what's gonna happen?
- It could go one of two ways.
I think, like, depending on how I feel,
I might know say a quick few words to her.
Or I could just completely just ignore them,
because if she doesn't like me,
I'm not gonna make an effort.
I don't know which way I'm gonna go yet.
- You know what helps? - What?
- A couple shots before you go.
- Whiskey? - Tequila.
- Oh, my God.
- Coming up... - Crazy.
- What kind of kiss do you want, my love?
- Just-- - Just like a little kiss.
- Yeah. - Really, just a little one?
- It's my birthday. - That's all you want
is a little one? - Yeah.
- OK. - Do some more, though.
- * No, no, no lie *
* Real queens don't die *
* We just pass on the crown and multiply *
* So you can keep hitting on a boss lady *
* But you can't knock the hustle, babe *
* No, no, no lie *
* Real queens don't die *
* We just pass on the crown and multiply *
* So you can *
- I'm stuck in my own coat. - Hi, how are you?
Good evening. - Hi, how are you?
- Very well. - Hello.
- Happy birthday. - Oh, thank you.
It's so kind of you. - Can I take care of your coat?
- Yes, please. Merci.
Oh, you guys.
Aw, it's so cute.
- The team has been working all morning.
- It's so sweet. - Balloons are in.
- It's a lot of balloons.
I'm extremely happy.
This is my dear friend's restaurant.
We have the most fabulous balloons,
all the alcohol that you can want.
So I'm so excited to just host everyone.
- We got our cheese and charcuterie board here.
- You know, we still have to be careful
and keep all the cheese knives and paring utensils
away from this group, but we've come a very long way,
and it feels like a safe space for brie.
Yay! - Enjoy.
- I'm so--thank you so much.
[upbeat music]
* *
- Hi, how are you? - [gasps]
- Hello. - Oh!
- Look at you.
- Ooh. - Oh, it's beautiful.
- Yes! - Beautiful!
- 29? - 29, baby.
- Never looked so good. We missed you.
- I missed you more. How are you?
- You look spectacular. - Let me see your little mask.
- This is my little mask. - Should I put mine on?
Mine's a hat. - Mine's a holding--
- I like the holding. I like the holding.
- It's holding.
- I'm gonna leave you guys for one second
because I'm gonna find the boy's room.
It was a long ride in. - OK.
Wait, should I put my hat on?
- You look like a bandit. - It's a fashion moment.
Wait a minute.
- You kind of look like the McDonald's bandit.
- Yeah, sure, I'll steal your fries if you have some.
I mean, food is food. Your girl is hungry.
What's the problem here?
I think it looks hot.
* *
- It's so great to see you. - So good to see you.
- Hi, how are you? - Hello!
- You look so beautiful. - Thanks, boo boo.
- You belong in Venice, darling.
- Right? - Yeah.
- Oh, there they are. - Hey!
- Yay! - Oh, you guys are here.
- Hello. Hey, there. Hey, pirate.
- Hi. - How are you?
- Looking great. - Thank you.
Thank you, thank you. You look hot.
- It's beautiful. Oh, my God, you look amazing.
- Thank you. You too.
- Sh--. - Hi, boo boo.
- How are you? - How are you?
You look hot. - You look hot too.
You're the--all I want to do is hang out with you guys.
- Who's your biggest fan?
- The only reason why I'm friends with your wives
are because I just want to hang out.
I'm just trying to get to you.
- She thinks we have, like, good eligible friends.
My good friends are all happily married.
- So you're useless. - I'm completely useless.
- [laughs]
- Have you not talked to Sai about this?
* *
- There she is. - Oh! Ho-ho-ho!
- Double trouble. - Happy birthday.
- Hi, bunny. - Hi.
- Can you wrap me up in this? - Oh, were doing it?
We're doing a group hug?
- Are we the only idiots wearing masks?
- Oh, sh--. Wait. No one's wearing a mask?
Oh, come on. Wait, that was the assignment.
- Come.
There's some-- there's some cheese in here.
You know, my favorite. - Hi, there.
- How we doing, ladies? - Good.
How are you? - Yes! I love it!
- You look great! Hi, baby.
- Hi, honey. - Hi, birthday girl.
- Hi, hi, I love your mask.
- So nice to see you. - I've missed you.
- So handsome. My God.
- Hi, I'm Brynn. - This is my friend Sarah.
Sarah, this is Brynn.
She is the birthday girl. - Hello. Lovely to meet you.
- The invite clearly states bring the person
who you either, A, last had sex with,
and/or B, the person who you want
to have sex with that evening.
- Wait, did you bring anyone with you tonight?
- No, I didn't bring a plus one.
- So, Jenna, which one is it?
And more importantly, where do I fit
into this equation?
[laughs]
- What kind of kiss do you want, my love?
- Just-- - Just like a little kiss.
- Yeah. - Really, just a little one?
- It's my birthday.
- That's all you want is a little one? OK.
- Yeah. Even more, though.
- OK.
- I am the next Mrs. Jenna Lyons.
It's gonna happen, whether she likes it or not.
- I had to talk to you. - What about?
- When I first met you, and I was blown away by you,
and I think you're a spectacular woman,
I made a comment that probably
is not the best comment to make.
Why don't you have a man yet, and stuff like that.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- But I want you to know where I was coming from.
I was trying, in my wrong way, to compliment you.
- Yeah, OK.
- And I do not think a woman needs a man
on their arm to be successful.
- How about we do-- we make this
as like a teachable moment. - Yes.
- It's just a wrong question. - Yes.
- For me... - It was the wrong question.
- For me, I promise you. - I totally agree.
No, it was the wrong question.
- [laughs]
Very, very-- - I love you too.
Let's go celebrate. - I adore you, I adore you.
- All right. Let's go.
- Yeah, let's do. Let's do this.
Let's do this.
- Is Jessel here? - I don't see her.
- If she were here, would you see her?
- I don't think--
I don't think so. - OK.
- Thanks.
- Jessel's always gonna be late.
- To you--to you, Jessel is just camo, isn't she?
She's camouflage. You're a fashion girl.
She's camo. - She is just Jessel.
- What does this mean? - It's a group setting.
Like, Jessel's cool in a group setting.
She's just, one on one, it's not my jam.
- Oh, wow.
Look at--it's so cute. - Very cool.
- Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Hi! - Hi!
- Hello, hello. - Hi, boo.
- Oh, my God, you look gorgeous.
- You--you too. Let me see. - No one's wearing a mask.
- No, I--uh-uh--it's just not attached to my face.
- Oh, well then, I'm just gonna--
- Long time no see. I love this.
- Hi, guys. - Hi!
- What's going on? - How are you?
- Nothing much. Just hanging out.
- Good, good. - No hug. No warm hello.
What did I do to her? I didn't do anything?
- Who cares?
- Coming up...
- Pavit, I was a little bit thrown off
when we were sitting with Jenna,
and you called Sai bipolar.
He said, "She's just being a ----ing bitch."
- No, hug. No warm hello.
What's wrong with-- like--
- I'm gonna get some cheese.
- I didn't have any problem with her.
- You know how much I love cheese.
- I think she's starting out on the right foot.
She's ignoring me.
It's exactly what I've asked for.
- She didn't even say hi to me. - Who?
- What did I do?
- Why get--Why don't you go say hi to her?
- Excuse me. Can you move?
- Gonna some cheese? - Excuse me.
I would like some cheese. - Go get your cheese.
- Is this cheese platter acceptable to you?
- You know how I feel about the cheese, OK, Abe?
- Hi.
You look a vision.
Oh, my God.
- Hi, Jessel, you didn't say hi to me.
- Hi, what's up? - Are you OK?
- I'm good. Are you OK?
- Yeah. - OK.
- I just was surprised you didn't say hi to me.
- I did say hi. - Hi, guys.
- Hi. - What's going on?
- How are you? - Nothing much.
Just hanging out. - Good, good.
- Not really. - OK.
Well, you know, I heard that you were saying
all this sh-- about my husband.
- Not one thing.
- Like, he doesn't wear a ring, and that he goes to Vietnam,
and then something's, like, off with that.
- It's not true.
All I do is say what I think...
- What are you goes talking about?
- Constantly. - Listen.
- All I do is say what I think.
- I'm not dealing with this, Erin.
All I'm saying is, Brynn told me the stuff
that you were saying about my husband,
and I was clearly upset. - What? What stuff?
- And just FYI, like, I heard you don't like me,
so like, you know, let's just--
- It's not that I don't like you.
I just don't want to be best friends.
- I don't want to be best friends either.
- Amazing.
Sai, the last thing I need to do is sit there,
and paint nails, and braid hair.
Like let's just go our separate ways.
I am so glad we finally agree on something.
- Cool? We're good? - Perfect.
- I never said we weren't good.
- Let's just get a shot, OK? You want to come?
- Sure. - OK.
- I'm gonna go with her for a minute.
- Yeah, yeah.
- I already had a dirty martini,
which is too much alcohol for me.
- Wait, it's too much alcohol for you?
- I can't do more than one. - OK, really?
- Yeah, I get drunk. - That's so cute, though.
- I'm like a two-drunk minimum.
- [laughs] A two-drunk minimum?
- Well, maximum. - A two-drink maximum?
- Yeah, that's what I meant.
- I truly have, I feel like, tried with you lately,
to, like, be nice and to be OK.
And I've heard-- I've heard horrible things,
but it doesn't make me lash out like it does you.
- I'm not lashing out.
- OK, but I've heard that you have a whole notepad
filled with sh-- about me.
- I have a checklist that I've been keeping
in my ----ing phone about this bitch.
BOTH: Whoa!
- Apparently she keeps notes on what everyone says
and how she feels in that moment.
- That's wild.
- That is so psychotic, and I don't do that.
- And by the way to call me a pet parrot multiple times is,
first of all, it's ridiculous. - OK.
- Guys, don't fight, don't fight, don't fight.
Hey, hey, don't fight. Don't fight.
- Why are you putting me aside?
She's my friend, but I'm not--
like, we're not the same person.
- I can't. I can't.
Nothing makes me happier than to miss out on the drama.
Great. Let me know when it's over.
- Every single time we get into an altercation,
it's the two of you. - What are you talking about?
You guys were fighting at Swingers,
and I was with Ubah the entire time.
Why in the moment were you mad at me and not at her?
Why? I don't get it.
- I was mad at both of you.
- I think the problem is is that you're not mad enough.
You don't get, like--
- Guys, nothing is worth getting mad enough, OK?
Like-- - Your integrity is.
- I don't get, like, to a point where
I'm gonna scream at someone.
I'm never gonna ----ing put you down.
- Me neither, by the way. - But nobody is saying--
- You confuse standing up with yourself...
- But you are. - With being ratchet.
No, there's a way in your voice and your loveliness
to stand up for yourself.
- Why do you keep calling me a pet parrot.
It's not nice.
- I have stuck up for myself and taken care of myself
since I was younger.
With Jessel, I think maybe she's literally
incapable of doing it.
- Are we done?
- I just did.
- I've told her ad nauseam, stick it to these bitches
and you will get respect, and she's not doing it.
You guys, let's go get a drink,
and then we're gonna do something.
You know, it's like ----ing stick up for yourself.
OK, what I actually want to do, it's like New Year, new you,
is I think--and this is gonna sound effing crazy,
but I promise, I did this at my yoga teacher training.
Let's just go around. It could be personal.
It could be someone else.
If you air your grievance, we leave it here,
and then it's all done. - Why would we want to do that?
- Because I hear these little things,
and it's just so-- - So what?
We're airing our dirty laundry? Is that what you're saying?
- Why would we want to do that at a party?
- No, it's not because of that.
It's because of, like, just-- - It's her birthday wish.
- It's my birthday, and I feel like
because you both told me all this sh--
about, like, you, Erin, and Jessel,
and figure it out and end it here.
- Jenna! - All right! I'm fired up!
- What a fun party trick.
Hey, guys, let's sit down and air out our grievances
at my birthday party
said no one ever.
- So here's what I'm just thinking.
We're gonna air grievances, and there's something that--
something that has ran personally in my family.
Pavit, I was a little bit thrown off
when we were sitting with Jenna,
and you called Sai bipolar.
- That's so --ed up.
- Is Sai bipolar? Yes. - Oh.
- Ooh. - She flips a switch.
- I did not mean that.
- But Boo Boo, when you took it back,
you took it back, and then you were--
I was like, "Yo, yo, yo."
Jenna and I looked at each other,
and even Jessel, and we were like,
"Yo, you don't want to do that,"
because you didn't know what you were--
you didn't mean it at all. - He didn't mean it.
- I'm definitely not bipolar.
Also very offensive
considering my mother was bipolar.
So I don't think we should go around
maybe claiming that people have
a mental illness when they don't.
- However, then I was like, "Take it back."
He said, on record, hand on heart,
"I take it back."
And he goes, "She's just being a ----ing bitch."
[dramatic music]
- Did I call Sai a bitch? Probably.
And if I did, she's a bitch.
- Don't confuse being a bitch with being honest.
I'm straightforward with your wife.
Sometimes she lies.
She says things that don't make sense to me.
- What am I lying about? - You lie all the time.
You have so many white lies that just kind of flicker away.
- Like what? - Everything that you say.
The Vietnam thing, for example? - Um, who cares.
- No one gives a (BLEEP), Jessel!
- Don't yell at me.
- Obviously, I have to yell if you're not gonna
----ing comprehend what I'm--
- Don't ----ing raise your voice.
- No one gives a (BLEEP), Jessel, whatsoever.
- Clearly... - But she just asked me.
So if you just ask me, let me explain!
- Clearly you care. - Let me explain!
- OK. So talk. - You just asked me what?
- Don't yell-- don't yell at me.
- Obviously, I have to yell if you're not gonna ----ing
comprehend what I'm ----ing-- - Don't raise your voice.
- The conversation went, "Pavit booked
"a staycation for me.
"I thought it was super sweet. It was lovely.
He did it right before he was leaving."
- He's going to Vietnam in a couple of weeks,
and so I want a-- I'm, like, really happy
that he-- he planned this before then.
- Then I go to Swingers, and you're--
I'm like, "Oh, my God, you're leaving next week?"
And you go, "I don't have a ticket."
- I didn't say that. I did not say that.
- Yes, you did. - What's going on?
When are you leaving? - There's no date yet.
- I thought you were leaving next week.
- I'm not going next week. - He's not going next week.
He's trying to figure it out, like, his date.
- I have a ticket.
It's an open ticket. - Right.
She said you have a date. - Yeah, I have a date.
I had a date, February 9.
Flights didn't open. That's gone.
It changes now.
- Can you explain to me why that is important?
- That's lie after lie. - What lie? What lie?
- I'm not lying.
- I don't know when you are flying.
- Let's go. Let's go get some food.
I'm starving. - OK, you got me.
- Everyone shut the (BLEEP) up. I'm so bored of this.
I'm gonna find my husband. - OK.
- Your husband--
- We'll, I'm gonna go get my pet parrot!
- It's Brynn's birthday. I just want to get drunk.
- Jessel always says she wishes she was a guy,
because guys don't give a (BLEEP) about drama--
petty drama.
- No, we have drama, and then we just let it go.
- We let it go. - Yes.
- That's the whole point. We let it go.
- Come on, guys. Come, come, come, come.
You're gonna want to see this.
- Listen, you have to.
- You know what? - You have to go...
[whistles]
- Can you get your wife to like me again?
I don't know what the hell is wrong with her?
- I don't think she dislikes you.
- Oh.
- She thinks you're an amazing person
as a human being, but it seems
you didn't want to open up, and I don't know why.
I don't know. - It's hard for me to open up.
- Yeah. - I think it's--
- What are you guys talking about?
- We're talking about-- - I'm just saying--
I'm just saying it's hard for me to open up.
Like, I don't know why it is.
It just--I struggle with it. - Yes.
- So you ask me a question, I'll give you, like,
a very, like, umbrella answer.
- The only thing Sai ever said to me about you
was I just want to know about Jessel--
- Who she is.
At the end of the day, I just want to know you
for you. - Yeah.
I appreciate that. I deeply respect Sai,
but I'm not gonna beg and plead
for anyone to be my friend.
I've realized that when the Q-tip meets resistance,
you got to stop digging in there
and push the Q-tip out. - Where is my pet parrot!
- You're like cackling hags,
and then I heard you call people a pet parrot.
- Yeah. - Wait, I got a pet parrot.
- A pet parrot? - Oh, my God.
Oh, my God, Jessel, I cannot believe you called--
- I cannot believe you said it. - Wait.
This is kind of ----ing amazing.
- This is my pet parrot.
- I don't know what's happening.
I am obsessed with the pet parrot.
It's the best Erin move ever.
- I'm a parrot. - Don't talk to her.
- Can you-- - Don't talk to my pet parrot.
Don't you dare talk to my pet parrot!
- This is a great sign that Erin
actually has a sense of humor.
But you make a good pet parrot for sure.
There's a moment in time to take things seriously,
and there's a moment in time to laugh at yourselves,
and in this moment we're all laughing
at ourselves.
- I have to tell you, I'm learning English
through you guys, but it's not good vocabulary.
- [laughs]
- And I don't think I can use this in my business meeting.
- You definitely cannot. - Cackling hag.
Cackling--what is that? Cackling thing.
- Pet parrot. - Pet parrot, cackling hags.
- Guys, I need to try to get investors.
- There's a bunch of things that I--
- Please, teach me the English that actually
I can get money.
I'm really, really, really happy
of where my life is going.
I am grateful for the friends I've chose,
the career I have led.
The opportunity that are coming my way,
and I want to enjoy the journey.
I don't really care how fast I'm gonna get
to my destination.
- You know what this all proves?
How much smarter Jenna is than all of us.
That's what this proves right here.
- I don't know if that's the case.
- You ain't gonna fall for this sh--.
I don't know if that's the case, honestly.
I really don't. - I--I do know--
- Can we go to the bar? - No, I really don't.
- But, listen, when I said it earlier--
- What's amazing to me, what they have that I don't
is like they have fearless in a way that I am not.
It's like there is-- - Are you kidding me?
- You got to the height you got to not being fearless?
I think you're selling yourself short.
- No, I--I can--listen, I can have a perspective on it.
I didn't.
I mean, I couldn't walk into the room
the way this one could.
- It's funny when you say that, 'cause Sai talks about you,
like you're a superwoman. - I'm surprised.
I'm also flattered just because
I have a ton of respect for Sai.
- No, she does.
- I get mad at you, though, when you--
when you don't have confidence in yourself.
I get actually very upset, when I know
that you're much more than that.
- I honestly think that being open
has everything to do with the landing pad.
You can't be open in an environment
that doesn't feel safe.
So when the environment feels safe,
and I feel like there's a level of trust, I'm OK.
I think with my experience with this friend group,
I think I'm feeling the landing pad.
Now what's happening?
Oh, sh--.
ALL: * Happy birthday to you *
* Happy birthday dear Brynn *
* Happy birthday to you *
[all cheering]
- No, stop it.
Helium and CO--no, stop.
Helium. I know.
I did organic chem. Ooh, this is us.
- I know, yeah. - We love Nancy Drew.
- Nancy Drew, it made me so happy.
- I love Nancy Drew books.
I grew up reading them, wanting to be her.
I'd, like, spy on neighbors.
This is the best cake ever.
As an adult, when I'm, like, really emo and weird,
I'll still read them.
It's a quick read, and it, like,
makes you feel good. - Make a wish.
- Blow them out. - You know my wishes.
[all chanting] Make a wish! Make a wish!
Make a wish!
- Two husband-- one for you, one for me.
- Two-- - Come on.
- What I was just told. Two husbands.
- Yes. - One for me, one for Ubah.
- Yes!
[all cheering]
- We love you.
- Can I just get all the boys? Can I do all--
a whole moment. - Let's do it. Let's do it.
- OK, boys, boys. Come here.
Now we're doing it together.
Everybody's hands. - Oh.
- Everybody's-- - Hand job!
Hand job! - Hand job.
- It's a Brynn hand job.
This is literally my dream scenario.
I just want the husbands and the boyfriends.
1, 2, 3.
It should have just been me and the guys this birthday.
[all cheering]
Yay! We did it.
- Oh, my God,
if Brynn could be slapped by a thousand dicks
on her birthday, I think this would be her ideal scenario.
- Well, that's a big piece of cake.
- Wow. Wow.
- You don't mind if I sit here, do you?
- Can I steal your cake? - Yeah, just take a piece.
- Thank you. - So let's get over it.
I think we should all get over it.
You make me sick, and sometimes I don't like you.
- You make me sick too, and sometimes I don't like you.
- And sometimes I feel like you're annoying too.
Over the summer you were a ----ing bitch with the cheese.
I love cheese. You know what? I'm over it.
This is a friend group. They are my family.
My friends are my family that I choose,
and at the end of the day, sometimes you fight
with your family, and that's OK.
Sometimes you get over it, and sometimes
you got to fight it out.
[phone ringing]
- Hi.
I'm gonna call you in, like--
I'm gonna call you, like, in 20 minutes.
All is good.
I just want to say, all is good.
Well, goodbye.
- Ubah, I heard you got a man in Connecticut.
- Oh, no. - Oh.
- Oh, my God.
- Brynn!
- Ubah, I heard you got a man in Connecticut.
- Oh, no. - Oh.
- Oh! - Oh, my God.
- Brynn! - Where is Connecticut?
What is that? - Where's Connecticut?
- When was the last time you drove?
- Every week I drive. - To Hudson?
- Yeah, I--to Hudson. I go to Connecticut.
- Brynn, that was ---ed up. - Yeah.
- No, it's not. - Yeah, it is. Don't do that.
- After the costume shop, Sai and I
took Brynn out for her birthday.
We went to her favorite place, Casa Cipriani.
We were talking for a while, and we made a decision.
We all looked at each other in the eye and said,
"This is the circle of trust."
That's when Sai told us a little bit more
about Ubah's boyfriend, where he lived, what he does.
- I don't think that's appropriate.
- OK, Sai.
- That's someone's personal business.
- So you can understand my shock
when I hear first thing out of Brynn's mouth
is "Connecticut."
Circumcise you.
The whole thing was confidential.
So she must have heard from Sai,
but for Brynn to mention a part of that,
I'm just like, "Bitch, you don't deserve a birthday.
"We should not come.
"We should take you to McDonald drive-through, literally,
and no fries for you."
- Sai started it. It's on camera.
- She's fine. She's very happy.
I mean, she's dating someone.
And she goes, "She's fine, she's fine."
Then you went to Connecticut.
- You--you--you know what? You--I love you so much.
- I was never gonna ask you to do anything more.
- No, no, no.
- You have to not freak the (BLEEP) out
about everything.
- You need to stand from these bitches,
but I'm going. Going home. - You're going home?
- Yeah, yeah, I'm done.
Brynn, happy birthday. I'm out of here.
- Is she really leaving?
- Wait, she's pissed that you actually named
the state that she's dating someone in?
Is that what we're really talking about?
- Any time something personal,
particularly in your romantic life,
is exposed, it's really vulnerable.
It's not a good feeling,
and I can understand Ubah wanting to keep that private.
Like, she's hurt and upset, and I get it.
- And I repeated something Sai said.
- She did.
- I saw it.
- How did she know that? - To God, that's what I said.
The difference between me telling Erin about Ubah
dating someone on camera was a total accident.
I told her, and I instantly regretted it.
Me telling Brynn?
All right, I spilled the beans.
I was drinking, but I asked her specifically,
please do not say anything.
- You told me she was dating someone in Connecticut.
Are we still mad about this? - I never told you CT.
- Yes, you did. - When did I tell you CT?
- Geotag. - I geotagged, and I said CT.
And if I did say that--
that is --ed up. That is --ed up to say that.
That's someone's personal business.
And I said it, and I definitely said it on camera.
- How would I know it then? How would I know it?
- It is her story to tell.
That's not OK. - So I'm wrong about that.
- So I apologize for that, so that was your story to say,
and I'm sorry to say.
You said it on camera. - You're being wack right now.
- She said it on the camera.
- Yeah, she said it on the camera.
Yeah, you did with her.
- I said that she's dating someone
in CT on camera? - That wasn't on camera.
You're saying-- - You said it was on camera.
- It was not on ----ing camera!
That is her business. That is her story to tell.
You don't ----ing do that.
- Let's not get angry and try-- - (BLEEP) you Brynn.
(BLEEP) you tonight. Have a good birthday.
(BLEEP) you.
I want nothing to do with Brynn--
absolutely nothing to do with her.
I feel like I let Ubah down and Brynn let me down.
----ing asshole. I'm out.
- Ubah. - Where's the jacket.
Where's my jacket? - You can try to be mad.
- Brynn, you're in a doghouse, this is not cool.
And I know she's gonna blame it on the alcohol.
Then don't drink.
Like, no, I'm actually not happy at all.
- I thought we were dancing and having dinner.
- First rule of circle of trust is don't break the trust.
Sai, Erin, and I talked about certain things,
and that's understandable.
Sai lost her (BLEEP) thinking that I had broken
the trust tree, but I hadn't.
I just drunkenly mentioned a U.S. state.
Dropdown menu. CT.
- Because Sai is the one who told her.
- Oh, (BLEEP), that is not my drink.
- And Sai told me--ooh! - Whew!
- Did you drink tequila? - Whew!
- I'm really sorry. - No, it's OK.
It's OK. It's really--it's OK.
It's OK. - That's not ----ing OK.
Do you understand?
- I know, I know, I know, I know.
Don't-- Sai, really, don't worry.
- Well, that's not OK.
- Happy birthday. Enjoy.
- Wait. Why, why?
- No, because for the millionth time--
- Are we OK?
- You didn't stick up for yourself
and do whatever, and then I get--
I--I get blamed for some stupid-ass sh--
for saying a state.
- I am done with this petty bullsh--.
If it were up to me to kind of move past everything
that's happened, I would do it in a heartbeat,
because life's too short.
- I'm gonna go. - Love you.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Love you.
Happy birthday.
- You want to wait inside for the car?
It's a little cold out here?
- I mean you could give me your jacket, you a-hole.
- Oh, I--oh, sh--. I could give you my jacket.
I'm ----ing cold too, then.
- Is this how you felt at your anniversary party
when we actually left. - It sucks, right.
- It's weird.
Like, I thought we were just gonna rage.
- I--I thought so too.
- And then people actually get mad about sh--.
- I'm at a loss.
This night was not how I expected.
- Bye, Erin. - Bye.
- I think everyone needs to cool off,
and hopefully we can all come together
and press the reset button. - Yay!
[all cheering]
- Ready? Boop!
Up! [laughter]
- A year from now, my next birthday,
I see myself in my apartment with one little cupcake
and a little candle because I have
absolutely no friends anymore. [laughs]
Again! Again!
But I'll probably be the governor of Connecticut.
Go CT.
- Hey!
[all cheer]
[upbeat music]
* *
* Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah *
* We're all dancing in the dark *
* Broken pieces, open hearts *
* Painting over every scar *
* Turning tragic into art *
* Feels like magic *
* Just like magic *
* Feels like magic *
* Just like magic *
* Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah *
* Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah *
* One more time *
* Feels like magic *
* Just like magic *
* *
- Next week, it's part one
of "The Real Housewives of New York City" reunion.
- Hey, where your jeans from?
- Oh, this place called Levi's
I don't know if you've ever heard of it.
- Jenna ----ing Lyons did it again.
- Brynn, are you taking your boob out?
- One of my favorite authors is Judith Blume.
- Judy Blume
- Her real name is Judith. - Is it?
- Let's address the elephant in the room.
- Yeah. - Have you eaten?
- This is a sorority. You have to get hazed.
- What is different between TV Jenna
and real Jenna?
- TV Jenna is poor me, victim, and the real Jenna,
it's powerhouse.
- You watch the show, Erin. - I did.
- Do you watch it with a ----ing blindfold
over your face?
- You don't even remember half the night.
You were drunk. - I had a rough summer.
Oh, my God.
- Maybe you don't know how to be loved.
- Watch your ----ing mouth. - No, no, no.
- I'm not afraid of you. You put people in the hospital?
- Ooh.
- I am so tired of just nobody have my back.
(BLEEP) all of you.
- Where do you go from here?
[dramatic music]