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00:00:02,502 --> 00:00:04,970
(funky disco plays)
♪ My name is Cleveland Brown
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♪ And I am proud to be
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♪ Right back in my hometown
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♪ With my new family
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♪ There's old friends
and new friends ♪
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♪ And even a bear
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♪ Through good times
and bad times ♪
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♪ It's true love we share
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♪ And so I found a place
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♪ Where everyone will know
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♪ My happy mustached face
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♪ This is The Cleveland Show. ♪
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Hey, guys.
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Christmas is coming up, so
here's my Christmas wish list.
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I would've put it on an iPad
Mini, but I do not have one.
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And I want a Gucci purse,
because I'm black or Italian.
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(projector rattling)
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Hello and thank you
for coming to...
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"Getting What's Mine:
A Dynamic Analysis
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"of Good versus Bad Behavior
Over the Last Fiscal Year
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and its Relation
to Presents Deserved."
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That's it!
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I am tired of
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you selfish children begging
like it's a pledge drive.
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I did not raise a house
full of public radio stations.
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Nobody is getting
anything for Christmas
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until they give
something back.
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Givin' back!
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This year,
we're all volunteering
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at the homeless shelter.
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Pass.
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Then you most definitely
will not get that purse.
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Gaudy materialism!
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Fine. Then
I'll get a job.
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Don't use me
as reference!
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(groans)
The rest of you,
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go up to your rooms
and put together
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a bag of clothes
to donate.
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Give 'em away!
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That includes you,
Cleveland.
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Hope they like yellow shirts,
blue pants and red thongs!
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Hey, sir, we came down
to help feed the homeless.
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Did you bring forks?
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Uh...
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(chuckles):
Just kidding.
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They don't use forks.
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Are they Chinese?
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Choppysticky?
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(laughs)
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Just get in the kitchen
and help.
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Okay. Bye.
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Those onions
getting to you?
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I'm chopping potatoes.
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(sobbing):
Boo-boos.
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Mm. I'm so hungry, I could eat
a sandwich meant for a peasant.
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Hand pain!
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Hey, those sandwiches
were donated
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by the finest
restaurants in town.
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They're for
the homeless.
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♪
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(heart beating, heavy breathing)
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(glass shatters)
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Wow!
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Yum, yum, yum, yum.
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Meow, meow, meow.
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(purrs)
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So, Grundle's department store
maintains the highest standard
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for the celebration
of Christmas,
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set over a hundred years ago
by my grandfather,
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the original
Harry Grundle.
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I want a job.
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Great, you're an elf.
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Now put these on. Next!
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(giggles)
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Kendra? What are you doing here?
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You already got the part
of Mrs. Claus.
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I'm reading for the
role of Santy Claus.
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The fella who played him
for the last 20 years died.
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How'd he die?
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A fart to the face.
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(clears throat)
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Ho, ho, h...!
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I'm sorry, Kendra, you're just
not right for the part of Santa.
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But I'm fat, jolly, and I only
leave the house once a year.
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But you're not a man, doll.
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But I can do this job
better than any man.
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Hey, Arch, you want to be Santa?
No.
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Will you do it anyway?
Yes.
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Sorry, Kendra,
the role's been filled.
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I've never been
so embarrassed.
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I doubt that.
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You're right.
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Cleveland, you okay?
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You haven't
touched your food.
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Because I stole and ate
seven sandwiches
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from the homeless shelter...
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(clears throat)
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Going one more time
from the top.
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Because your cooking
is terrible...
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(clears throat)
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Take three.
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I can't eat this.
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Not after what I saw
at the sandwich buffet--
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I mean, shelter.
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While there are men
going hoagie-- hungry,
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how can I sit at this table,
sandwiched-- correctly used--
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between my children?
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Where are you going?
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To squat and pinch off
seven sandwiches
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and head back to the shelter.
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Uh-oh.
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And then there were six.
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Bye for now.
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(chewing noisily)
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Here, take mine.
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Looks like you haven't
had a good meal in days.
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Yeah.
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I'm homeless.
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But at least
I'm not ham-less.
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Or cheese-less.
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(giggles)
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I'm pretending to be homeless
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while eating
a ham-and-cheese sandwich.
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(whispers):
I'm terrible.
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Come on, Tim the Bear,
they don't all look alike.
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Don't let Lester
start rubbing one off on you.
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Your sandwich, sir.
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Thanks, dummy.
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I've seen you around
a lot lately.
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You make me sad.
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What's your name,
sad man?
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Don't got a name.
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Why's that?
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Didn't think of one.
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Oh.
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Well, I'm Maggie.
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Cleveland Brown.
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Mm-hmm.
This is Reed.
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Backwash?
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No thanks, brought my own.
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(grunts, gulps)
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(sighs)
143
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And we call this
gentleman The Prof.
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I guess this is some sort of
research project for you?
145
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Oh, indeed.
146
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I'm conducting research
on how many college students
147
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one can sleep with
before they revoke your tenure
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and drain your life of meaning.
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Nine.
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That's not tobacco
in that pipe, is it?
151
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No, it's not.
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So, what's your story, Brown?
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How'd you end up here?
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Just like anyone else,
I suppose.
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Internet bubble.
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Housing bubble.
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Racism.
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Vietnam.
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Get in the chopper!
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Ah, everybody
in the chopper's dead!
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Lieutenant Dan
ain't got no legs!
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(screams)
163
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Why?!
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So I got a shopping
cart and here we are.
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Well, on behalf
of everyone here
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and the voices
in my head, welcome.
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Welcome.
Welcome.
Welcome.
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I'm gonna stab you
in the face!
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I still think
you'd make a great Santa.
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Well, unless I win the
lottery and pay the $58,640
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for genital
reassignment surgery,
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I am never
getting that part.
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Actually, that's kind of
why I invited you out.
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(gasps) Roberta, I will
pay you back every cent.
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No! No, that's not
what I meant.
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Look!
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Saa...
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Suuuh...
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Saaan...
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Saaanta.
181
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Muh...
182
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"Muh?"
183
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It says, "Santa Wanted."
184
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Upside down
"muh" is "wuh?"
185
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What do you think?
186
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Of being a
"Laundrymat" Santa?
187
00:07:38,225 --> 00:07:41,126
Do you remember what
you asked Santa for
188
00:07:41,128 --> 00:07:42,494
when you were
five years old?
189
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I don't know what I...
190
00:07:44,064 --> 00:07:46,765
You asked for a black Barbie
with white Barbie hair.
191
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How do you remember that?
192
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An elephant never forgets.
193
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You told Santa it had to be
that Barbie or nothing at all.
194
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Well, that's how I feel
about Grundle's.
195
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If it ain't Grundle's,
it ain't Christmas.
196
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Thanks, but
no thanks.
197
00:08:10,189 --> 00:08:13,425
(washing machine humming)
198
00:08:13,427 --> 00:08:14,926
Hi, Roberta.
199
00:08:14,928 --> 00:08:18,763
You know I saw Eric Clapton
in here once?
200
00:08:22,702 --> 00:08:25,770
Okay, new guy,
time for hobo initiation.
201
00:08:25,772 --> 00:08:27,205
Shh.
202
00:08:27,207 --> 00:08:28,807
This is a hot dog.
203
00:08:28,809 --> 00:08:30,375
Take whatever you want.
204
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It's free.
205
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Wow!
206
00:08:34,047 --> 00:08:36,882
I feel like a kid
in a used candy store.
207
00:08:36,884 --> 00:08:38,950
What else you guys got
in this place?
208
00:08:43,122 --> 00:08:51,563
♪ I'll be homeless
for Christmas ♪
209
00:08:51,565 --> 00:08:58,069
♪ It's the life for me
210
00:08:58,071 --> 00:09:00,405
Donated food fight!
211
00:09:00,407 --> 00:09:05,010
♪ Stealing toys
212
00:09:05,012 --> 00:09:08,079
♪ For my two boys
213
00:09:08,081 --> 00:09:09,414
And girl.
214
00:09:09,416 --> 00:09:17,989
♪ And flu vaccines for free
215
00:09:17,991 --> 00:09:26,598
♪ Shelter life is awesome
216
00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:32,871
♪ Except the smell of pee
217
00:09:32,873 --> 00:09:34,773
That's me!
218
00:09:34,775 --> 00:09:43,949
♪ I'll be homeless
for Christmas ♪
219
00:09:43,951 --> 00:09:52,023
♪ And never brush my teeth.
220
00:09:57,296 --> 00:09:58,530
(panting)
221
00:09:58,532 --> 00:09:59,965
Hey, guys,
222
00:09:59,967 --> 00:10:02,367
a truck full of
sticks and bandanas crashed into
223
00:10:02,369 --> 00:10:04,869
a truck filled with
cans of beans and harmonicas!
224
00:10:04,871 --> 00:10:06,972
It's what we've been
waiting for!
225
00:10:06,974 --> 00:10:08,306
(cheering)
226
00:10:08,308 --> 00:10:09,874
I want some.
227
00:10:13,813 --> 00:10:15,480
You're up,
little boy.
228
00:10:15,482 --> 00:10:16,915
Don't be nervous.
229
00:10:16,917 --> 00:10:19,250
Nervous? I got on
five pair of underwear.
230
00:10:19,252 --> 00:10:20,652
He ain't getting in there.
231
00:10:20,654 --> 00:10:22,387
Don't touch.
232
00:10:22,389 --> 00:10:23,622
What do you want?
233
00:10:23,624 --> 00:10:24,823
Well, I wanted
to tell you
234
00:10:24,825 --> 00:10:27,092
that I was a good
boy this year.
235
00:10:27,094 --> 00:10:28,059
Define "good."
236
00:10:28,061 --> 00:10:29,961
I always finished my plate.
237
00:10:29,963 --> 00:10:31,296
That's what
you're supposed to do.
238
00:10:31,298 --> 00:10:33,331
I also brushed my teeth
every night.
239
00:10:33,333 --> 00:10:34,733
Don't care.
240
00:10:34,735 --> 00:10:35,934
Dental hygiene
is its own reward.
241
00:10:35,936 --> 00:10:37,335
What do you want for Christmas?
242
00:10:37,337 --> 00:10:40,405
A Nerf Vortex
Nitron Blaster.
243
00:10:40,407 --> 00:10:42,173
You'll get
a wooden tennis racket.
244
00:10:42,175 --> 00:10:44,843
It was good enough for Bjorn
Borg, it's good enough for you.
245
00:10:44,845 --> 00:10:46,311
Ho, ho, ho.
Good-bye.
246
00:10:46,313 --> 00:10:47,345
What?!
247
00:10:47,347 --> 00:10:49,280
Well, (bleep)!
248
00:10:49,282 --> 00:10:51,316
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
249
00:10:51,318 --> 00:10:52,984
(sighs)
250
00:10:55,921 --> 00:10:59,424
Sorry, Roberta,
but even a pallet ride
251
00:10:59,426 --> 00:11:02,027
around the yard
can't cheer me up.
252
00:11:02,029 --> 00:11:03,528
Maybe this will.
253
00:11:03,530 --> 00:11:05,096
I tricked her out.
254
00:11:05,098 --> 00:11:07,699
A new coat of paint,
stainless steel runners
255
00:11:07,701 --> 00:11:10,535
and hydraulics that can carry
half a ton of presents
256
00:11:10,537 --> 00:11:12,203
and half a ton of you.
257
00:11:12,205 --> 00:11:14,105
Why did you do this?
258
00:11:14,107 --> 00:11:16,841
Look, you remembered
what I wanted ten years ago.
259
00:11:16,843 --> 00:11:18,877
That's who
should be Santa.
260
00:11:18,879 --> 00:11:21,980
Not that monotone jerk
who buys us beer.
261
00:11:21,982 --> 00:11:25,550
Roberta, Mr. Grundle
already told me no.
262
00:11:25,552 --> 00:11:27,552
You can't let sexism
get in your way.
263
00:11:27,554 --> 00:11:29,521
Stand up to him.
264
00:11:29,523 --> 00:11:31,856
I can't stand up!
265
00:11:31,858 --> 00:11:33,224
Whatever.
266
00:11:33,226 --> 00:11:35,060
I'm done with getting
my hopes up,
267
00:11:35,062 --> 00:11:37,996
and I'm done with Christmas.
268
00:11:37,998 --> 00:11:41,599
This is why I've never
spoken to you before this week.
269
00:11:44,070 --> 00:11:45,837
Junior, we're off
to Grundle's.
270
00:11:45,839 --> 00:11:47,972
I really do wish
I could come,
271
00:11:47,974 --> 00:11:49,908
but they're short-handed
at the shelter.
272
00:11:49,910 --> 00:11:51,176
That's okay.
273
00:11:51,178 --> 00:11:52,510
The kids and I will be fine.
274
00:11:52,512 --> 00:11:54,012
You're doing a great thing.
275
00:11:54,014 --> 00:11:56,381
Well...
Proud of you.
276
00:11:56,383 --> 00:11:58,283
(giggles) Tickles.
277
00:12:00,086 --> 00:12:01,920
Merry Christmas.
278
00:12:01,922 --> 00:12:04,556
I'm Ari Cohen,
filling in for everyone.
279
00:12:04,558 --> 00:12:07,158
Tonight, we'll be
crowning our annual...
280
00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:09,094
Christmas Angel?
281
00:12:09,096 --> 00:12:10,328
Whatever.
282
00:12:10,330 --> 00:12:11,763
But first, let's check in
283
00:12:11,765 --> 00:12:14,833
with the Grundle's
Xmas Xtravaganza.
284
00:12:14,835 --> 00:12:17,435
And, in an effort to appeal
to younger viewers,
285
00:12:17,437 --> 00:12:21,406
we go to a rapping vampire,
live on the scene.
286
00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:24,042
♪ I'm sorry to report
there's no Christmas cheer ♪
287
00:12:24,044 --> 00:12:26,277
♪ 'Cause Santa Claus
is nowhere near ♪
288
00:12:26,279 --> 00:12:28,747
♪ The kids are crying,
the parents are... ♪
289
00:12:28,749 --> 00:12:30,782
This is ridiculous.
290
00:12:30,784 --> 00:12:33,685
I've been doing this
for 130 years.
291
00:12:33,687 --> 00:12:35,186
What happened to the days
292
00:12:35,188 --> 00:12:37,355
when a vampire
could just read the news?
293
00:12:37,357 --> 00:12:40,525
Anyway, Santa's a no-show
and the kids are upset.
294
00:12:40,527 --> 00:12:43,261
It looks like Christmas
is canceled.
295
00:12:43,263 --> 00:12:45,130
Santa forgot Stoolbend.
296
00:12:45,132 --> 00:12:47,899
Where are you, Santa?
297
00:12:47,901 --> 00:12:49,434
(children sobbing)
298
00:12:49,436 --> 00:12:51,269
No Santa?
299
00:12:51,271 --> 00:12:53,238
Roberta was right.
300
00:12:53,240 --> 00:12:56,608
It's up to me to save Christmas.
301
00:13:00,646 --> 00:13:02,881
Hold on, childrens.
302
00:13:02,883 --> 00:13:05,450
Santa's coming.
303
00:13:16,829 --> 00:13:18,296
(screaming)
304
00:13:20,232 --> 00:13:21,666
Oh, no! Oh, no!
305
00:13:21,668 --> 00:13:24,469
Wait, I know.
306
00:13:24,471 --> 00:13:27,272
Rascal, rise!
307
00:13:27,274 --> 00:13:28,807
Oh, well.
308
00:13:28,809 --> 00:13:31,075
I've done everything
humanly possible.
309
00:13:31,077 --> 00:13:32,677
Good-bye, world.
310
00:13:32,679 --> 00:13:34,479
You were delicious.
311
00:13:38,017 --> 00:13:41,519
Don't want.
Don't want. Don't want.
312
00:13:41,521 --> 00:13:43,154
Holy crap! London Fog!
313
00:13:43,156 --> 00:13:46,024
Now it's time
for our Christmas Angel Award.
314
00:13:46,026 --> 00:13:48,860
This year's winner
was nominated by his wife
315
00:13:48,862 --> 00:13:51,696
for his work
at the Stoolbend Shelter.
316
00:13:51,698 --> 00:13:54,165
That's where we are. Cool!
317
00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:55,633
Desk lamp?
318
00:13:55,635 --> 00:13:57,135
Give it to me!
I need that!
319
00:13:57,137 --> 00:14:00,271
We go there now
as this unsuspecting angel
320
00:14:00,273 --> 00:14:02,607
is about to get his wings.
321
00:14:03,709 --> 00:14:06,277
Hey. Look.
322
00:14:06,279 --> 00:14:08,980
I'm... on... TV!
323
00:14:08,982 --> 00:14:10,815
Give me that camera!
324
00:14:10,817 --> 00:14:12,283
I'm homeless!
I want it!
325
00:14:12,285 --> 00:14:14,452
Cleveland, you're pretending
to be homeless?
326
00:14:14,454 --> 00:14:16,287
Yes.
327
00:14:16,289 --> 00:14:19,524
But I've continued
to wash down there.
328
00:14:19,526 --> 00:14:21,359
Hmm? Tonight?
329
00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:22,727
No?
330
00:14:22,729 --> 00:14:24,295
But it's Christmas.
331
00:14:28,968 --> 00:14:32,337
BOY:
Cleveland Brown sucks!
332
00:14:32,339 --> 00:14:35,506
You give a homeless guy
a sandwich, and you're a hero.
333
00:14:35,508 --> 00:14:39,477
You take a homeless guy's hero,
and suddenly you're a sandwich.
334
00:14:39,479 --> 00:14:40,912
Well!
335
00:14:40,914 --> 00:14:43,748
Cleveland,
a word-- now.
336
00:14:43,750 --> 00:14:45,650
Well, we had a
good run, buddy.
337
00:14:45,652 --> 00:14:48,253
I'd love to say we'll keep
in touch after the divorce,
338
00:14:48,255 --> 00:14:50,922
but I'm not one for
lying on Christmas.
339
00:14:50,924 --> 00:14:53,224
You have completely ruined
this family's good name.
340
00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:56,261
You will apologize
and make this right.
341
00:14:56,263 --> 00:14:57,929
Okay.
342
00:14:57,931 --> 00:14:59,831
CLEVELAND:
Good morning,
members of the press
343
00:14:59,833 --> 00:15:01,833
and unwashed bloggers.
344
00:15:01,835 --> 00:15:03,601
I stand here in a dark suit
345
00:15:03,603 --> 00:15:06,771
with my lawyer by my side
and my wife behind me,
346
00:15:06,773 --> 00:15:09,173
barely able to conceal her anger
347
00:15:09,175 --> 00:15:11,943
as she nods dutifully
to show support,
348
00:15:11,945 --> 00:15:15,280
so that I can publicly
apologize for my actions.
349
00:15:15,282 --> 00:15:17,715
What I did at the shelter
was wrong.
350
00:15:17,717 --> 00:15:19,617
It was low down.
351
00:15:19,619 --> 00:15:21,085
Way low down.
352
00:15:21,087 --> 00:15:23,087
Like a midget.
(crowd gasping)
353
00:15:23,089 --> 00:15:25,356
(indistinct
whispering)
Really?
354
00:15:26,892 --> 00:15:30,128
And while trying to apologize
for my actions,
355
00:15:30,130 --> 00:15:32,764
I insulted little people,
which was wrong.
356
00:15:32,766 --> 00:15:35,133
It was worse
than interracial marriage.
357
00:15:35,135 --> 00:15:36,534
(indistinct
whispering)
358
00:15:36,536 --> 00:15:38,369
Serious?
Isn't that in the Bible book?
359
00:15:39,538 --> 00:15:40,972
Without interracial couples,
360
00:15:40,974 --> 00:15:42,974
we wouldn't have Halle Berry.
361
00:15:42,976 --> 00:15:45,944
So, obviously,
I can't be against that.
362
00:15:45,946 --> 00:15:49,147
I'm not some drunk Indian
on the rez.
363
00:15:49,149 --> 00:15:51,349
I knew it when I said it.
364
00:15:52,651 --> 00:15:54,819
If you Native Americans
had even
365
00:15:54,821 --> 00:15:57,121
the most basic system
of ownership,
366
00:15:57,123 --> 00:15:59,123
none of this
would have happened.
367
00:15:59,125 --> 00:16:02,293
Anyway, it's not as if you're
a bunch of low-life pervs
368
00:16:02,295 --> 00:16:04,929
lurking in chat rooms
to pick up underage boys.
369
00:16:04,931 --> 00:16:06,130
(indistinct
whispering)
370
00:16:06,132 --> 00:16:08,066
No way!
You've got to be kid...
371
00:16:08,068 --> 00:16:11,402
CLEVELAND:
And while I cannot support
your man-boy love,
372
00:16:11,404 --> 00:16:13,471
I appreciate
that you'd allow me
373
00:16:13,473 --> 00:16:15,573
to continue my apology tour.
374
00:16:15,575 --> 00:16:17,942
Please know that I am sorry.
375
00:16:17,944 --> 00:16:21,546
Me so belly, belly solly.
376
00:16:30,155 --> 00:16:32,590
(groans)
377
00:16:39,498 --> 00:16:41,799
Hey, Brown.
Where you been?
378
00:16:41,801 --> 00:16:44,669
I just wanted to come by
and apologize.
379
00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:45,636
For what?
380
00:16:45,638 --> 00:16:47,872
For pretending I was homeless.
381
00:16:47,874 --> 00:16:49,607
Did that happen
one minute ago?
382
00:16:49,609 --> 00:16:50,708
No.
383
00:16:50,710 --> 00:16:51,776
Then I forgot about it.
384
00:16:51,778 --> 00:16:52,977
Ha! You fried.
385
00:16:52,979 --> 00:16:54,612
Hungry?
386
00:16:54,614 --> 00:16:57,115
This is just government cheese
387
00:16:57,117 --> 00:17:00,284
and nonorganic
processed ham food.
388
00:17:00,286 --> 00:17:01,986
What happened
to this place?
389
00:17:01,988 --> 00:17:04,188
This is what it's like
the rest of the year.
390
00:17:04,190 --> 00:17:05,690
Christmas
is the only time
391
00:17:05,692 --> 00:17:08,559
anyone in this town
gives a crap.
392
00:17:08,561 --> 00:17:10,328
You know what?
393
00:17:10,330 --> 00:17:13,064
We need to talk some sense
into this town.
394
00:17:13,066 --> 00:17:14,732
We're going
to Grundle's.
395
00:17:14,734 --> 00:17:16,034
Right now?
396
00:17:16,036 --> 00:17:17,201
What, you got
a tee time?
397
00:17:17,203 --> 00:17:18,703
"Tee" standing
for "trash"?
398
00:17:18,705 --> 00:17:19,971
(laughs)
Just teasing.
399
00:17:19,973 --> 00:17:21,472
Y'all bums
come on.
400
00:17:23,042 --> 00:17:25,076
Hey, is that a wheel?
401
00:17:25,078 --> 00:17:26,411
(engine whirring)
402
00:17:26,413 --> 00:17:29,313
Three more,
and we can build a wagon,
403
00:17:29,315 --> 00:17:31,749
which we could sell
for drugs.
404
00:17:31,751 --> 00:17:33,751
(all grunting)
405
00:17:33,753 --> 00:17:35,086
Kendra!
406
00:17:35,088 --> 00:17:36,521
Are you okay?
407
00:17:36,523 --> 00:17:38,089
(exhales)
408
00:17:38,091 --> 00:17:40,158
I've got to get
to Grundle's.
409
00:17:40,160 --> 00:17:42,226
That's where
we're going.
410
00:17:42,228 --> 00:17:44,862
It's a Christmas
miracle or something.
411
00:17:44,864 --> 00:17:46,431
(motor sputters)
412
00:17:46,433 --> 00:17:47,765
You'll have to pull me.
413
00:17:47,767 --> 00:17:48,900
With what?
414
00:17:48,902 --> 00:17:50,735
I have a rope.
415
00:17:52,504 --> 00:17:53,938
It's too dark.
416
00:17:53,940 --> 00:17:55,106
I can't see a thing.
417
00:17:55,108 --> 00:17:56,340
I can help.
418
00:17:56,342 --> 00:17:58,910
Here goes 20 minutes
of sobriety.
419
00:18:11,790 --> 00:18:13,624
Hyah! Hyah!
420
00:18:13,626 --> 00:18:16,427
Hmm, I wonder
if I'm Dasher or Prancer.
421
00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:18,296
ALL: Prancer.
CLEVELAND: Wha...?
422
00:18:22,234 --> 00:18:24,202
It's after Christmas,
423
00:18:24,204 --> 00:18:26,204
and I still have
to wear the shorts?
424
00:18:26,206 --> 00:18:27,605
Mr. Grundle,
425
00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:29,974
why do all the men
get to wear long pants?
426
00:18:29,976 --> 00:18:32,043
I don't hire boys
to see their legs,
427
00:18:32,045 --> 00:18:34,479
and I don't hire girls
to hear them talk.
428
00:18:34,481 --> 00:18:35,813
(loud crash)
429
00:18:35,815 --> 00:18:37,782
(crowd gasps and murmurs)
430
00:18:37,784 --> 00:18:39,383
Ho ho ho!
431
00:18:39,385 --> 00:18:41,986
Merry Christmas!
432
00:18:41,988 --> 00:18:44,222
Santa!
433
00:18:44,224 --> 00:18:46,491
Santa, we thought
you forgot us.
434
00:18:46,493 --> 00:18:48,559
Oh, I didn't forget you.
435
00:18:48,561 --> 00:18:52,130
Mrs. Claus had a hysterectomy,
and I had to be there.
436
00:18:52,132 --> 00:18:55,933
But thanks to an elf
who never gave up on me,
437
00:18:55,935 --> 00:18:59,170
I'm finally here
where I belong.
438
00:18:59,172 --> 00:19:01,806
Now, who wants presents?
439
00:19:01,808 --> 00:19:03,641
We do!
(children cheering)
440
00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:05,510
Uh-oh.
441
00:19:05,512 --> 00:19:08,346
Uh, everyone just take
one thing from the store
442
00:19:08,348 --> 00:19:10,648
and walk out quietly
and confidently.
443
00:19:10,650 --> 00:19:12,783
They can't stop all of you.
444
00:19:12,785 --> 00:19:14,285
(children cheering)
445
00:19:14,287 --> 00:19:16,521
The day after
Christmas is saved.
446
00:19:16,523 --> 00:19:18,322
Back to work,
Hot Legs.
447
00:19:18,324 --> 00:19:20,024
You know what,
Mr. Grundle?
448
00:19:20,026 --> 00:19:21,826
I'm sick
of your sexist ways.
449
00:19:21,828 --> 00:19:23,094
Okay.
450
00:19:23,096 --> 00:19:24,362
I quit.
451
00:19:24,364 --> 00:19:26,597
And if you like
these shorts so much,
452
00:19:26,599 --> 00:19:28,666
why don't you wear them
yourself?
453
00:19:33,338 --> 00:19:37,308
We will no longer
be objectified.
454
00:19:37,310 --> 00:19:39,844
(wind whistling)
455
00:19:39,846 --> 00:19:41,345
(all shivering)
456
00:19:41,347 --> 00:19:43,614
Come on, let's
keep warm.
457
00:19:46,385 --> 00:19:49,520
Good people of Stoolbend,
hear me speak.
458
00:19:49,522 --> 00:19:51,389
MAN:
Hey, it's the guy who
stole from the homeless.
459
00:19:51,391 --> 00:19:52,990
WOMAN:
Undeserved
Christmas angel!
460
00:19:52,992 --> 00:19:55,059
MAN:
Sandwich Grinch!
461
00:19:55,061 --> 00:19:56,727
I've tried to apologize
462
00:19:56,729 --> 00:19:59,297
for many things recently
and failed,
463
00:19:59,299 --> 00:20:03,634
but I come to you now
for one last apology-- yours.
464
00:20:04,703 --> 00:20:06,370
For one week every year,
465
00:20:06,372 --> 00:20:08,406
you open your closets,
your wallets
466
00:20:08,408 --> 00:20:10,374
and your hearts
to the less fortunate,
467
00:20:10,376 --> 00:20:12,643
but the moment Christmas
is over,
468
00:20:12,645 --> 00:20:15,913
you forget all about
these smellies.
469
00:20:15,915 --> 00:20:19,917
I say, let's treat the homeless
as if every day were Christmas.
470
00:20:19,919 --> 00:20:21,852
Or Chanukah.
471
00:20:21,854 --> 00:20:25,656
So let's all apologize
to the homeless.
472
00:20:26,892 --> 00:20:28,159
I'm sorry.
473
00:20:28,161 --> 00:20:29,527
It's a juicer.
474
00:20:29,529 --> 00:20:30,928
I have no use for this.
475
00:20:30,930 --> 00:20:32,330
You're welcome.
476
00:20:33,565 --> 00:20:36,267
Cleveland, you may have
done the wrong thing,
477
00:20:36,269 --> 00:20:38,069
and then several more
wrong things
478
00:20:38,071 --> 00:20:39,904
trying to correct
that wrong thing,
479
00:20:39,906 --> 00:20:42,240
but you made up
for it all
480
00:20:42,242 --> 00:20:44,242
with a small
token gesture
481
00:20:44,244 --> 00:20:46,777
that required
no personal sacrifice.
482
00:20:46,779 --> 00:20:49,113
I did, didn't I?
483
00:20:49,115 --> 00:20:52,016
Baby, I'm the greatest.
484
00:20:52,018 --> 00:20:55,386
So I guess this
is good-bye forever.
485
00:20:55,388 --> 00:20:57,622
You could still
come see us.
No.