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00:00:01,935 --> 00:00:04,670
(funky disco plays)
♪ My name is Cleveland Brown
2
00:00:04,672 --> 00:00:07,006
♪ And I am proud to be
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00:00:07,008 --> 00:00:09,008
♪ Right back in my hometown
4
00:00:09,010 --> 00:00:12,011
♪ With my new family
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♪ There's old friends
and new friends ♪
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♪ And even a bear
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♪ Through good times
and bad times ♪
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♪ It's true love we share
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00:00:20,221 --> 00:00:22,554
♪ And so I found a place
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♪ Where everyone will know
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00:00:24,825 --> 00:00:27,026
♪ My happy mustached face
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00:00:27,028 --> 00:00:28,961
♪ This is The Cleveland Show. ♪
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(chuckles)
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Cleveland Brown here.
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00:00:34,869 --> 00:00:37,403
There are 15,000 countries
in the world,
16
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and The Cleveland Show
is adapted to air
17
00:00:39,707 --> 00:00:41,407
in every single one of them.
18
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See if you can spot
the subtle cultural differences.
19
00:00:45,012 --> 00:00:47,913
(rooster crowing,
mariachi music playing)
20
00:00:50,717 --> 00:00:52,584
(playing Latin classical music)
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00:00:52,586 --> 00:00:53,852
Cleveland!
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Doña! Mí amór!
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No hace mucho frio.
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Hace mucho calor.
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Mmm...
Stop practicing
your Spanish on me
26
00:01:02,563 --> 00:01:04,563
and tell me whose
dress this is!
27
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Are you cheating on yo?
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(organ plays dramatic chord)
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Doña, I swear,
30
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I've never seen
that dress before.
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Perhaps it's...
32
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(rolling Rs):
R-R-Roberta's!
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(organ plays dramatic chord)
Uh-uh. I don't shop
34
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at J.C. Peso!
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(organ plays
two dramatic chords)
36
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Turn those organ stings down,
37
00:01:21,715 --> 00:01:23,715
you soccer-loving
Chiclet chewers!
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Como se dice,
"Whoa...!"
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Whose dress is it, Cleveland?!
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It's my dress!
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Catorce years old.
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I'm turning 15, silly.
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And Miss Choni and Cecilia
are coming over
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to make my birthday
a special occasion.
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I'm having a quinceañera!
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You are an embarrassment!
47
00:01:44,872 --> 00:01:46,939
And what is
a quinceañera?
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It's a traditional 15th
birthday party for girls.
49
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Okay. Have a baby,
right here on the spot.
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Which you could do if you
were a girl, but you're not.
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00:01:56,083 --> 00:01:57,816
So no quinceañera!
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(sobbing):
You don't understand me at all!
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(Mexican hat dance playing)
(loud sobbing)
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(organ playing soap opera music)
55
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ANNOUNCER:
Las Noches Gordas de Cleveland
will return, con queso.
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(dramatic orchestral music
playing)
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No.
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♪
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No.
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No.
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ANNOUNCER:
No...
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00:02:36,090 --> 00:02:37,656
by Consuela.
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Product formally known
as Lemon Pledge.
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(mariachi music playing)
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(knocking)
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(gasps) Cecilia!
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Next muchacha hit me in
the face gonna get it.
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(grunts)
Ow! Choni,
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that was my penis.
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00:02:51,138 --> 00:02:54,139
Hunior texted me
many faces of frowning.
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So we brought over
my aunt,
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who flew all the way
from Hollywood
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to hah-ner Hunior.
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iTia Sofia!
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Sofia Vergara
is your aunt?
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00:03:05,186 --> 00:03:07,452
Yes, Señor Brown.
And while you might know me
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00:03:07,454 --> 00:03:09,821
from my Screen Actors Guild
Award-winning role
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00:03:09,823 --> 00:03:11,623
on a hit TV show,
79
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you may not know
that I myself was
once 15 years old.
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00:03:15,229 --> 00:03:17,663
Oh, did you say that
in a People interview
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00:03:17,665 --> 00:03:19,398
that was in my
dentist's office?
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That sounds about right--
I do like to mention
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the ages I've been.
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Maybe a song will convince you
85
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there's more to a quinceañera
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00:03:26,073 --> 00:03:27,873
than just some girly party.
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Sorry, wasn't listening.
88
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I have a lot of two things
on my mind.
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But go ahead and sing.
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♪
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♪ As soon as boys,
they turn fifteen años ♪
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♪ They never want
to come out of their baños ♪
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♪ When they get hair
in strange places ♪
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♪ And refried-bean faces
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♪ We dare ya to throw
a quinceañera♪
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00:03:53,167 --> 00:03:55,234
♪
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00:03:55,236 --> 00:03:59,371
♪ When Aztecs
turn fifteen years old ♪
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♪ Quinceañera meant
they were now warriors ♪
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♪ So many centuries ago
100
00:04:06,580 --> 00:04:08,380
♪ Before whitey stole
101
00:04:08,382 --> 00:04:09,915
♪ California
102
00:04:09,917 --> 00:04:11,383
♪ So celebrate
103
00:04:11,385 --> 00:04:13,285
♪ Your son's fifteen años ♪
104
00:04:13,287 --> 00:04:17,723
♪ And don't just take it
from all us Chicanos ♪
105
00:04:17,725 --> 00:04:20,926
♪ There's plenty of blacks
who'd bring over six-packs ♪
106
00:04:20,928 --> 00:04:24,129
♪ Don't let it scare ya,
throw a quinceañera! ♪
107
00:04:24,131 --> 00:04:26,798
(song ends)
108
00:04:28,434 --> 00:04:30,202
So it's like
a Mexican bar mitzvah?
109
00:04:30,204 --> 00:04:32,437
Well, why didn't
you just say that
in the first place?
110
00:04:32,439 --> 00:04:34,973
♪ Quinceañera
over here! ♪
111
00:04:34,975 --> 00:04:36,975
(gasps)
For real, Papi?!
112
00:04:36,977 --> 00:04:38,410
Happy birthday, son.
113
00:04:38,412 --> 00:04:39,978
You are now a man.
114
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Or... something.
115
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You look beautiful
in your dress.
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Feliz quinceañera!
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(lively Latin music playing)
(whooping, shouting)
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We love you, Latino viewers,
fastest-growing segment
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00:04:52,559 --> 00:04:54,626
of the television-viewing
audience.
120
00:04:54,628 --> 00:04:58,630
Our international spectacular
will return with more countries.
121
00:04:58,632 --> 00:05:02,167
But first, let's hear some
of the different catchphrases
122
00:05:02,169 --> 00:05:04,636
I have all around the world.
123
00:05:04,638 --> 00:05:07,139
And boomerang goes the dynamite.
124
00:05:07,141 --> 00:05:08,740
(studio audience laughter)
125
00:05:08,742 --> 00:05:10,442
Oy, caramba!
126
00:05:10,444 --> 00:05:11,910
(audience laughter)
127
00:05:11,912 --> 00:05:14,413
Donna, I'm stoned!
128
00:05:14,415 --> 00:05:16,982
(audience laughter)
129
00:05:16,984 --> 00:05:18,583
(Chinese accent):
Delivery!
130
00:05:18,585 --> 00:05:19,651
(audience laughter)
131
00:05:19,653 --> 00:05:22,120
Goal...!
132
00:05:22,122 --> 00:05:24,356
(continues shout)
133
00:05:24,358 --> 00:05:26,825
(running out of breath)
134
00:05:31,164 --> 00:05:32,698
Oh, here's a pretty flag.
135
00:05:32,700 --> 00:05:33,999
Which country is this?
136
00:05:34,001 --> 00:05:35,500
That's the gay flag.
137
00:05:35,502 --> 00:05:36,968
Ah. Greece.
138
00:05:36,970 --> 00:05:39,471
Welcome back to our
international spectacular,
139
00:05:39,473 --> 00:05:42,674
where we show you actual footage
of The Cleveland Show
140
00:05:42,676 --> 00:05:44,676
as broadcast overseas.
141
00:05:44,678 --> 00:05:48,847
Next up, the Jersey Shore
of Europe-- Italy.
142
00:05:48,849 --> 00:05:50,982
DiGiorno!
143
00:05:50,984 --> 00:05:53,552
(simple Italian melody playing)
144
00:05:59,692 --> 00:06:03,228
♪
145
00:06:06,999 --> 00:06:08,533
(slurping)
146
00:06:08,535 --> 00:06:11,169
You want to
slow down on that
spaghet, Kendra?
147
00:06:11,171 --> 00:06:14,740
Please? Even in a
yard full of slobs
you're standing out.
148
00:06:14,742 --> 00:06:16,908
Shut up, Lester
Krinklesacramoni.
149
00:06:16,910 --> 00:06:19,144
Look at you!
You're wasting away!
150
00:06:19,146 --> 00:06:20,545
Eat! Eat!
151
00:06:20,547 --> 00:06:23,148
Everybody eat!
(cheering)
152
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(gruff, Italian accent):
Thank you all for...
153
00:06:27,421 --> 00:06:28,820
coming.
154
00:06:28,822 --> 00:06:30,655
(clearing throat loudly)
155
00:06:30,657 --> 00:06:32,657
(normal voice):
Sorry. Garlic mashed potatoes.
156
00:06:32,659 --> 00:06:34,826
Next week I go on trial
157
00:06:34,828 --> 00:06:37,863
for 36 counts
or murder and racketeering,
158
00:06:37,865 --> 00:06:41,833
and let me just say,
these charges are
totally unfounded.
159
00:06:41,835 --> 00:06:44,603
Everyone knows I'm in
the "cable business."
160
00:06:44,605 --> 00:06:46,772
What company?
Crime Warner?
161
00:06:46,774 --> 00:06:48,840
(laughing)
162
00:06:48,842 --> 00:06:50,842
(Cleveland snaps fingers twice)
163
00:06:53,012 --> 00:06:55,347
Eh, heart attack.
While I'm away
164
00:06:55,349 --> 00:06:58,950
battling these detailed
and accurate charges,
165
00:06:58,952 --> 00:07:01,720
the family business
must continue.
166
00:07:01,722 --> 00:07:04,890
Therefore, I have chosen
my successor.
167
00:07:04,892 --> 00:07:06,525
This is it, Ernie!
168
00:07:06,527 --> 00:07:08,927
The day I've been
waiting for my
whole life!
169
00:07:08,929 --> 00:07:11,930
Oh, Larry, when I'm boss,
you can finally quit dancing,
170
00:07:11,932 --> 00:07:15,100
and I'll buy you a car
similar to the one you want
171
00:07:15,102 --> 00:07:17,302
that I can get through
a business connection.
172
00:07:17,304 --> 00:07:20,305
He is my son,
and I am so proud of him.
173
00:07:20,307 --> 00:07:21,807
Come on up here...
174
00:07:22,575 --> 00:07:24,309
...Rallo.
(gasps)
175
00:07:24,311 --> 00:07:27,446
What? Get the (bleep)
outta here!
176
00:07:28,581 --> 00:07:31,116
This kid here,
177
00:07:31,118 --> 00:07:33,952
he's got the street smarts,
the charisma
178
00:07:33,954 --> 00:07:36,455
and the meatballs
to lead this family.
179
00:07:36,457 --> 00:07:37,889
To Rallo!
180
00:07:37,891 --> 00:07:39,291
♪
181
00:07:39,293 --> 00:07:42,160
He's not fat enough
to be crime boss!
182
00:07:42,162 --> 00:07:45,263
And he doesn't even have hair
on his Rocky Balboas!
183
00:07:45,265 --> 00:07:47,766
Opera...!
184
00:07:47,768 --> 00:07:50,168
♪
185
00:07:50,170 --> 00:07:52,804
Dad, can I talk
to you for a minute?
186
00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:54,139
Anything you say to me,
187
00:07:54,141 --> 00:07:56,174
you can say in front
of my captains,
188
00:07:56,176 --> 00:07:58,410
Tim, Lester
and Tiny Pussy.
189
00:07:58,412 --> 00:07:59,611
Okay.
190
00:07:59,613 --> 00:08:02,013
Why, Dad?
Why Rallo and not me?
191
00:08:02,015 --> 00:08:05,584
All I ever wanted
my whole life was
to be like you.
192
00:08:05,586 --> 00:08:07,953
I can install cable! Watch!
193
00:08:07,955 --> 00:08:09,788
(cat screeches)
194
00:08:09,790 --> 00:08:11,289
Whoa!
195
00:08:11,291 --> 00:08:13,592
Whoa-ho!
Junior, you nut!
196
00:08:13,594 --> 00:08:16,595
Even when you're
whacking a guy,
you're just too cute.
197
00:08:16,597 --> 00:08:18,096
I am not!
198
00:08:18,098 --> 00:08:19,931
I'm a killing machine!
199
00:08:19,933 --> 00:08:20,966
Aw...
Aw...
Aw...
200
00:08:20,968 --> 00:08:23,001
I'll show you
I can be the head
201
00:08:23,003 --> 00:08:26,004
of this not-representative-
of-all-Italians family.
202
00:08:26,006 --> 00:08:29,708
Fine. You versus Rallo for
the head of the family.
203
00:08:29,710 --> 00:08:32,444
And two tickets to Tony
and Tina's Wedding,
204
00:08:32,446 --> 00:08:35,447
starring Lorraine Bracco
and The Situation.
205
00:08:35,449 --> 00:08:38,183
Soon I will announce
my decision.
206
00:08:38,185 --> 00:08:39,985
Thanks, Daddy.
207
00:08:39,987 --> 00:08:42,053
Sorry, Tiny Pussy.
208
00:08:42,055 --> 00:08:44,656
(band playing lively music)
209
00:08:44,658 --> 00:08:46,458
Damn, I look good!
210
00:08:46,460 --> 00:08:49,194
Probably gonna die
in this suit one day.
211
00:08:49,196 --> 00:08:51,129
Ay, Rallo, when
you're the boss,
212
00:08:51,131 --> 00:08:54,032
you think you could rub out
the Men's Warehouse guy?
213
00:08:54,034 --> 00:08:55,467
The fanook with the beard?
214
00:08:55,469 --> 00:08:58,136
He's gonna like the way he looks
without a head.
215
00:08:58,138 --> 00:09:01,139
(laughs)
Sure, I'll do it.
216
00:09:02,041 --> 00:09:04,509
(band plays lively intro)
217
00:09:04,511 --> 00:09:07,579
♪ Buca di beppo,
di buca di beppo, di bu... ♪
218
00:09:07,581 --> 00:09:09,748
Walt, what are you doing,
you knucklehead?
219
00:09:09,750 --> 00:09:10,916
That's my Big Wheel...
220
00:09:16,022 --> 00:09:17,856
Jeem-ba-lucci!
221
00:09:17,858 --> 00:09:20,091
Junior.
222
00:09:20,093 --> 00:09:22,394
We got to get
you out of here!
Put this on!
223
00:09:22,396 --> 00:09:25,130
♪
(siren approaching)
224
00:09:38,044 --> 00:09:39,377
(siren wailing)
225
00:09:39,379 --> 00:09:40,745
(phone rings)
226
00:09:40,747 --> 00:09:42,581
You took care of it last night?
227
00:09:42,583 --> 00:09:44,749
Good. You're
a good soldier, Ernie.
228
00:09:44,751 --> 00:09:46,851
I love you.
229
00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:50,322
(toilet flushing)
230
00:09:53,059 --> 00:09:55,360
(screaming)
231
00:09:55,362 --> 00:09:57,796
(continues screaming)
232
00:09:57,798 --> 00:09:59,698
Larry! Larry!
Talk to me!
233
00:09:59,700 --> 00:10:01,132
(sobbing)
234
00:10:05,271 --> 00:10:06,871
(door closes)
235
00:10:06,873 --> 00:10:08,073
Daddy! Daddy!
236
00:10:08,075 --> 00:10:10,075
Rallo drowned
Larry the Leopard!
237
00:10:10,077 --> 00:10:11,476
Just put him
in the dryer.
238
00:10:11,478 --> 00:10:13,812
He had my friend
Walt killed!
239
00:10:13,814 --> 00:10:16,047
So you're even.
Now, go on outside and play.
240
00:10:16,049 --> 00:10:18,249
No! He shouldn't be
head of the family!
241
00:10:18,251 --> 00:10:20,085
I'm your son, not him!
242
00:10:20,087 --> 00:10:22,253
He's just a big
mouth-breathing
canoli sucker!
243
00:10:22,255 --> 00:10:25,790
(shouting gibberish)
Salami, pesto, and spaghetti
and meatballs, pasta...
244
00:10:25,792 --> 00:10:27,125
Silencio!
245
00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:29,594
Boys, I've seen
all I need to see.
246
00:10:29,596 --> 00:10:31,062
I've made my decision.
247
00:10:31,064 --> 00:10:32,897
Let's take a drive.
248
00:10:32,899 --> 00:10:34,933
(dramatic orchestral music
playing)
249
00:10:34,935 --> 00:10:36,301
Mama?
250
00:10:36,303 --> 00:10:39,104
Hey, I'm just beating a rug.
251
00:10:39,106 --> 00:10:41,172
♪
252
00:10:47,246 --> 00:10:49,447
BOTH:
Please don't turn into the
woods, please don't turn into
253
00:10:49,449 --> 00:10:51,116
the woods, please don't
turn into the woods.
254
00:10:51,118 --> 00:10:53,284
RALLO:
Aw, he turned into the woods.
255
00:10:53,286 --> 00:10:56,488
CLEVELAND JR.:
They got no show
without us, right?
256
00:10:56,490 --> 00:10:58,123
♪
257
00:10:58,125 --> 00:10:59,424
Good-bye.
258
00:10:59,426 --> 00:11:02,160
This wasn't a hard choice.
259
00:11:02,162 --> 00:11:03,795
(gunshot)
260
00:11:03,797 --> 00:11:05,497
Oh, my God, he killed...
261
00:11:05,499 --> 00:11:07,165
Which one did he kill?!
262
00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:08,533
They're not gonna tell?!
263
00:11:08,535 --> 00:11:11,169
Oh, I'm going on a message board
to complain
264
00:11:11,171 --> 00:11:14,005
because I've got nothing else
going on in my life,
265
00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:16,307
and I invest too much
in TV characters.
266
00:11:16,309 --> 00:11:18,143
Coming up,
more Cleveland Show
267
00:11:18,145 --> 00:11:20,679
in other countries, dorks!
268
00:11:25,518 --> 00:11:26,985
Where's your dressing room?
269
00:11:26,987 --> 00:11:28,553
I'd like to try
these flags on.
270
00:11:28,555 --> 00:11:30,021
What?
271
00:11:30,023 --> 00:11:31,990
Here, there's six.
Start a room for me.
272
00:11:31,992 --> 00:11:33,858
(whispering):
There's seven.
273
00:11:33,860 --> 00:11:36,161
Now, let's see what
The Cleveland Show looks like
274
00:11:36,163 --> 00:11:39,230
in the birthplace of evil--
Germany.
275
00:12:30,549 --> 00:12:32,650
(crying)
276
00:12:50,302 --> 00:12:52,637
(crying)
277
00:13:22,268 --> 00:13:24,235
Heil... arious!
278
00:13:24,237 --> 00:13:26,738
Our next stop is India.
279
00:13:26,740 --> 00:13:28,473
So let's... Huh?
280
00:13:28,475 --> 00:13:30,008
Are you sure?
281
00:13:30,010 --> 00:13:32,243
Got a big red dot on it.
282
00:13:32,245 --> 00:13:35,246
I've been informed that
this is not the Indian flag.
283
00:13:35,248 --> 00:13:37,682
Instead,
our next stop is Jap-in.
284
00:13:37,684 --> 00:13:40,251
Juh-pan? Juh-pan.
285
00:13:40,253 --> 00:13:41,486
(wind whipping)
286
00:13:41,488 --> 00:13:44,088
♪
287
00:13:51,263 --> 00:13:52,931
(grunts)
(grunts)
288
00:13:52,933 --> 00:13:55,934
(chimes tinkling)
289
00:13:55,936 --> 00:13:59,037
I am sorry to be seconds late
for breakfast.
290
00:13:59,039 --> 00:14:01,339
It was difficult
to pull myself away
291
00:14:01,341 --> 00:14:03,341
from my joy of schoolwork.
292
00:14:03,343 --> 00:14:06,010
Yet tardiness is inexcusable.
293
00:14:06,012 --> 00:14:08,546
A great conflict you faced.
294
00:14:13,219 --> 00:14:14,519
(grunts)
295
00:14:17,389 --> 00:14:20,358
Miss Donna-san.
Daddy-san.
296
00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:22,460
I honor
your truth.
297
00:14:22,462 --> 00:14:24,729
There is only this moment.
298
00:14:24,731 --> 00:14:27,332
Now there is only this moment.
299
00:14:27,334 --> 00:14:29,834
The other moment is gone.
300
00:14:29,836 --> 00:14:32,370
Now there is only this moment.
Uh, there it went.
301
00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:34,505
Okay, here come another.
302
00:14:34,507 --> 00:14:36,307
There is only this moment.
303
00:14:36,309 --> 00:14:38,476
You are wise,
esteemed husband.
304
00:14:38,478 --> 00:14:41,312
And you bring great honor
to this family.
305
00:14:41,314 --> 00:14:42,580
And here in Japan,
306
00:14:42,582 --> 00:14:44,749
nothing is more important
than honor.
307
00:14:44,751 --> 00:14:47,085
And I shall bring
even greater honor
308
00:14:47,087 --> 00:14:49,220
with my new scheme.
309
00:14:49,222 --> 00:14:52,557
Tonight, at Waterman Cable,
when everyone else leaves,
310
00:14:52,559 --> 00:14:55,760
I will stay and work
eight additional hours.
311
00:14:55,762 --> 00:14:57,495
For no pay!
312
00:14:57,497 --> 00:14:59,397
Strictly for honor!
313
00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:01,432
But Waterman-san
will catch you
314
00:15:01,434 --> 00:15:03,334
and look at you
silently for a moment!
315
00:15:03,336 --> 00:15:05,003
He will not.
316
00:15:05,005 --> 00:15:06,905
For I shall
disguise myself
317
00:15:06,907 --> 00:15:10,008
as pile of shoes
outside the door.
318
00:15:10,010 --> 00:15:11,509
That is
perfect!
319
00:15:11,511 --> 00:15:12,744
We'll be
rolling
in honor!
320
00:15:12,746 --> 00:15:14,279
Rolling
in it!
321
00:15:14,281 --> 00:15:15,513
Hi-ya!
Hi-ya!
Hi-ya!
322
00:15:15,515 --> 00:15:17,015
Donna, please.
323
00:15:17,017 --> 00:15:20,485
Big mouth, little honor.
324
00:15:24,757 --> 00:15:27,759
Father, please do not forget
to attend my match tonight.
325
00:15:27,761 --> 00:15:30,228
This is night
of your sumo wrestling match?
326
00:15:30,230 --> 00:15:31,596
What? I'm not
a wrestler.
327
00:15:31,598 --> 00:15:33,131
I'm a competitive eater.
328
00:15:33,133 --> 00:15:34,766
This is my diaper.
329
00:15:34,768 --> 00:15:38,436
Regardless, I cannot attend
your competition tonight,
330
00:15:38,438 --> 00:15:43,241
for I must work long hours
to bring great honor to family!
331
00:15:43,243 --> 00:15:45,209
But Cleveland, to miss
Junior-san's event
332
00:15:45,211 --> 00:15:46,477
would dishonor family.
333
00:15:46,479 --> 00:15:48,112
Uh-oh!
334
00:15:48,114 --> 00:15:49,380
(gong sounds)
335
00:15:49,382 --> 00:15:50,915
Don't worry, Father.
336
00:15:50,917 --> 00:15:52,583
Work is more
honorable
337
00:15:52,585 --> 00:15:54,953
than number-one son's
dumb old eating contest.
338
00:15:54,955 --> 00:15:57,488
I'll be in my room
salting my rice with tears.
339
00:15:57,490 --> 00:15:59,590
(doorbell rings)
340
00:15:59,592 --> 00:16:01,893
I am your new neighbor,
Mr. Zilla.
341
00:16:01,895 --> 00:16:05,229
I am required to tell you that
I am a registered sex offender.
342
00:16:05,231 --> 00:16:06,464
Was it the bad kind?
343
00:16:06,466 --> 00:16:07,999
Oh... yeah.
344
00:16:08,001 --> 00:16:10,501
(gong sounds)
345
00:16:10,503 --> 00:16:11,002
(electrical hissing)
346
00:16:11,004 --> 00:16:12,837
Esteemed friends,
347
00:16:12,839 --> 00:16:15,006
I've really got
my vending-machine panties
348
00:16:15,008 --> 00:16:16,641
in a bunch here.
349
00:16:16,643 --> 00:16:17,976
I can't be at work
350
00:16:17,978 --> 00:16:21,012
and at my son's match
at the same time.
351
00:16:21,014 --> 00:16:23,815
Why don't you build
a Cleveland robot
352
00:16:23,817 --> 00:16:27,118
to attend fat son's eating
competition while you work?
353
00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:28,753
(cackling)
354
00:16:28,755 --> 00:16:30,121
That's the best idea
355
00:16:30,123 --> 00:16:32,757
since the courageous attack
on Pearl Harbor!
356
00:16:32,759 --> 00:16:35,626
This version doesn't air
in the U.S., right?
357
00:16:35,628 --> 00:16:38,663
Gus, may we dismantle karaoke
machine for robot parts?
358
00:16:38,665 --> 00:16:40,498
GUS:
Hush, friend!
359
00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:43,668
I'm trying to watch a game show
that could turn into porn!
360
00:16:43,670 --> 00:16:46,037
There it
goes! Yuck!
361
00:16:48,941 --> 00:16:50,775
35 minutes.
362
00:16:50,777 --> 00:16:53,211
We could have finished faster
if we had worked harder.
363
00:16:53,213 --> 00:16:54,879
We should all
be ashamed.
364
00:16:54,881 --> 00:16:56,481
(all grunting)
365
00:16:56,483 --> 00:16:58,516
Clevetron, activate!
366
00:16:58,518 --> 00:17:02,086
(whirring, whooshing)
367
00:17:05,858 --> 00:17:07,792
I am Clevetron,
368
00:17:07,794 --> 00:17:10,628
Guardian of
the Universe!
369
00:17:10,630 --> 00:17:14,165
I will do anything you say.
370
00:17:14,167 --> 00:17:16,667
Anything.
371
00:17:16,669 --> 00:17:18,169
Damn writers are gay.
372
00:17:18,171 --> 00:17:20,571
Well, that's, uh...
I don't, uh...
373
00:17:20,573 --> 00:17:21,839
Good to know.
374
00:17:21,841 --> 00:17:23,341
(clears throat)
375
00:17:23,343 --> 00:17:24,876
Clevetron, I need you
376
00:17:24,878 --> 00:17:27,045
to attend Junior-san's
eating contest as me.
377
00:17:27,047 --> 00:17:28,813
That's it?
378
00:17:28,815 --> 00:17:31,382
Yup. Yup, that's it.
379
00:17:31,384 --> 00:17:32,884
What is with
this guy?
380
00:17:32,886 --> 00:17:34,352
Go, Clevetron!
381
00:17:34,354 --> 00:17:36,854
Show cold
and distant affection to son!
382
00:17:36,856 --> 00:17:38,856
(metallic creaking,
engine revs, tires squeal)
383
00:17:38,858 --> 00:17:40,858
(engine revving,
tires squealing)
384
00:17:40,860 --> 00:17:43,061
Wow, he's a
bad driver.
385
00:17:43,063 --> 00:17:44,595
Like many
Asians.
386
00:17:44,597 --> 00:17:45,863
Whoa!
387
00:17:45,865 --> 00:17:47,465
(gong sounds)
388
00:17:50,903 --> 00:17:53,237
Yeah! Yeah!
Eat!
389
00:17:53,239 --> 00:17:54,839
Eat!
390
00:17:54,841 --> 00:17:57,108
(stomach growling)
391
00:18:03,248 --> 00:18:04,916
We have a winner!
392
00:18:04,918 --> 00:18:07,452
Clap respectfully
for the God of Gurgitation--
393
00:18:07,454 --> 00:18:09,053
Cleveland Jr.!
394
00:18:09,055 --> 00:18:10,555
(applause)
395
00:18:10,557 --> 00:18:13,091
Great job, son.
396
00:18:13,093 --> 00:18:15,059
Daddy-san, you came!
397
00:18:15,061 --> 00:18:17,295
Yes. You make
Clevetron...
398
00:18:17,297 --> 00:18:18,896
(buzzer sounds)
399
00:18:18,898 --> 00:18:20,398
I mean, Cleveland Brown,
400
00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:23,901
your human father,
very proud.
401
00:18:23,903 --> 00:18:25,470
Wait a minute.
402
00:18:25,472 --> 00:18:28,106
"Copyright 2008
Fun Time Karaoke Company?"
403
00:18:28,108 --> 00:18:29,974
(gasps)
404
00:18:29,976 --> 00:18:32,310
You're not my dad!
You're a robot!
405
00:18:32,312 --> 00:18:34,979
I am better than father!
406
00:18:34,981 --> 00:18:39,550
I'm just a robot...
standing in front of a boy...
407
00:18:39,552 --> 00:18:43,121
asking him to love me.
408
00:18:43,123 --> 00:18:46,090
But I don't want you.
I want my dad!
409
00:18:46,092 --> 00:18:50,128
Why can't Clevetron
be enough?!
410
00:18:50,130 --> 00:18:51,996
Malfunction.
Malfunction.
411
00:18:51,998 --> 00:18:56,968
♪ The careless whisper
of a good friend... ♪
412
00:18:56,970 --> 00:18:58,169
MAN:
You suck!
413
00:18:58,171 --> 00:18:59,804
It picks up!
414
00:18:59,806 --> 00:19:01,239
MAN 2:
It's a chick song!
415
00:19:01,241 --> 00:19:04,275
It is a song
for getting chicks!
416
00:19:04,277 --> 00:19:07,612
Clevetron angry!
417
00:19:07,614 --> 00:19:10,515
♪ Tonight the music
seems so loud ♪
418
00:19:10,517 --> 00:19:13,084
♪ I wish that
we could lose this crowd... ♪
419
00:19:13,086 --> 00:19:16,120
(grunting)
420
00:19:16,122 --> 00:19:18,456
All right, children,
robot attack drill!
421
00:19:18,458 --> 00:19:20,825
Run screaming
past the camera!
422
00:19:20,827 --> 00:19:22,093
(children screaming)
423
00:19:22,095 --> 00:19:26,030
(yelling)
424
00:19:26,032 --> 00:19:28,399
(crickets chirring)
425
00:19:32,437 --> 00:19:35,773
Ah. Now to work
eight additional hours
426
00:19:35,775 --> 00:19:38,176
to bring further honor
to family.
427
00:19:38,178 --> 00:19:41,345
♪ Honor in the morning,
honor in the evening ♪
428
00:19:41,347 --> 00:19:43,114
♪ Honor at suppertime.
429
00:19:43,116 --> 00:19:45,149
(laughs)
Honor.
430
00:19:45,151 --> 00:19:47,552
Oh.
431
00:19:54,226 --> 00:19:55,726
Ah, Fukiyama!
432
00:19:55,728 --> 00:19:57,295
I'm going to that match.
433
00:19:58,463 --> 00:20:00,364
Sorry. Sorry.
434
00:20:00,366 --> 00:20:03,201
(metallic clank)
435
00:20:05,804 --> 00:20:09,073
Junior-san,
I am here for... you.
436
00:20:09,075 --> 00:20:10,908
(clanging, whirring)
437
00:20:10,910 --> 00:20:14,145
(yelling)
438
00:20:14,147 --> 00:20:15,179
Clevetron?
Huh?
439
00:20:15,181 --> 00:20:16,547
Prepare for battle!
440
00:20:16,549 --> 00:20:19,550
(grunts, electrical popping
and hissing)
441
00:20:19,552 --> 00:20:21,185
Hi... yah!
442
00:20:21,187 --> 00:20:25,523
(both grunting)
443
00:20:25,525 --> 00:20:27,525
(wind whipping)
444
00:20:27,527 --> 00:20:29,327
(beep)
I win.
445
00:20:29,329 --> 00:20:30,895
(sighs)
446
00:20:30,897 --> 00:20:34,065
I... would... have...
done... anything.
447
00:20:34,067 --> 00:20:35,600
(whirring)
448
00:20:35,602 --> 00:20:37,335
Even... butt stuff.
449
00:20:37,337 --> 00:20:39,003
Oh.
450
00:20:45,510 --> 00:20:47,111
Come on.
451
00:20:47,113 --> 00:20:48,846
Let's go home
and wang chung tonight.
452
00:20:48,848 --> 00:20:50,114
Everybody?
453
00:20:50,116 --> 00:20:54,385
Yeah, everybody.
454
00:20:54,387 --> 00:20:57,455
Thank you, United States. Thank
you, rest of the world. Bye!