1
00:02:27,022 --> 00:02:30,819
<i>For sometime now Stephen Turnbull
has been a man of routine.</i>

2
00:02:31,485 --> 00:02:34,202
<i>Everyday he showers for 27 minutes...</i>

3
00:02:35,614 --> 00:02:37,501
<i>brushes for 4...</i>

4
00:02:38,117 --> 00:02:39,809
gargles for 8...

5
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:41,548
<i>and flosses for 7.</i>

6
00:02:43,330 --> 00:02:44,754
<i>He then files the floss...</i>

7
00:02:46,959 --> 00:02:48,513
<i>stacks his urine...</i>

8
00:02:49,503 --> 00:02:51,057
<i>and notes its pH</i>

9
00:02:52,131 --> 00:02:55,512
<i>Next he washes everything
that has so far touched his body</i>

10
00:02:55,551 --> 00:02:59,228
<i>completes a 200-page book
of bumper crosswords</i>

11
00:02:59,263 --> 00:03:03,902
<i>and watches 8 episodes of
Ray Mears' Extreme Survival on video tape.</i>

12
00:03:03,934 --> 00:03:06,698
<i>Remember, you should always
carry a parachute.</i>

13
00:03:06,729 --> 00:03:09,065
<i>Then it's time for lunch.</i>

14
00:03:10,107 --> 00:03:12,326
<i>Everyday
Stephen eats the same meal-</i>

15
00:03:12,985 --> 00:03:15,072
<i>a freeze-dried vegetarian lasagne,</i>

16
00:03:15,112 --> 00:03:18,078
<i>hermetically sealed
for maximum life expectancy</i>

17
00:03:56,737 --> 00:03:58,956
<i>But today something is different</i>

18
00:04:01,033 --> 00:04:04,960
<i>Today there is a break in his
carefully-orchestrated routine.</i>

19
00:04:06,997 --> 00:04:09,382
<i>Today Stephen will attempt to do</i>

20
00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:11,753
<i>something he hasn't done
for over a year.</i>

21
00:04:14,046 --> 00:04:16,051
<i>Today...</i>

22
00:04:16,090 --> 00:04:18,142
<i>Stephen will try to leave the house.</i>

23
00:04:59,967 --> 00:05:02,850
<i>Ahoy there, matey,
and welcome to Captain Crab.</i>

24
00:05:02,887 --> 00:05:05,900
<i>He sails the 7 seas
so you don't have to,</i>

25
00:05:05,973 --> 00:05:10,694
<i>bringing you the freshest produce
which will have you hooked, line and sinker.</i>

26
00:05:10,769 --> 00:05:13,984
<i>Before we hoist anchor,
tell me your name, sailor.</i>

27
00:05:14,023 --> 00:05:16,787
- Stephen Turnbull.
- And where do you hail from?

28
00:05:16,817 --> 00:05:18,822
15B Limestone Road,

29
00:05:18,861 --> 00:05:20,830
King's Cross, London,

30
00:05:20,863 --> 00:05:22,868
N1 9KM.

31
00:05:22,907 --> 00:05:26,537
<i>Would you like to order fish-
such as cod, sole, haddock</i>

32
00:05:26,577 --> 00:05:29,341
<i>halibut, mackerel, catfish, krill...</i>

33
00:05:29,371 --> 00:05:30,380
No.

34
00:05:30,414 --> 00:05:34,886
Would you like to order crustacean-
such as crab, lobster, prawn, scallop...

35
00:05:34,919 --> 00:05:35,927
No.

36
00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:38,471
<i>Would you like to order
the vegetarian option?</i>

37
00:05:38,505 --> 00:05:39,392
Yes.

38
00:05:39,475 --> 00:05:41,345
<i>Great choice, shipmate.</i>

39
00:05:41,383 --> 00:05:43,388
<i>Today's vegetarian option is...</i>

40
00:05:43,427 --> 00:05:45,563
<i>Mixed vegetables.</i>

41
00:05:46,013 --> 00:05:47,683
<i>Sounds delicious!</i>

42
00:05:47,723 --> 00:05:50,440
<i>There's nothing that
the Captain likes more</i>

43
00:05:50,476 --> 00:05:53,026
<i>than to chow down
on a hearty plate of...</i>

44
00:05:53,854 --> 00:05:55,942
<i>Mixed vegetables.</i>

45
00:05:55,981 --> 00:05:58,200
<i>My personal favourite!</i>

46
00:05:58,234 --> 00:06:00,702
<i>To complete the order, just say
"Feed me."</i>

47
00:06:00,736 --> 00:06:02,741
What?

48
00:06:02,821 --> 00:06:04,722
<i>Say "Feed me."
Say "Feed me."</i>

49
00:06:04,969 --> 00:06:07,233
<i>Say "Feed me."
Say "Feed me."</i>

50
00:06:07,576 --> 00:06:09,166
Feed me.

51
00:06:09,245 --> 00:06:11,214
<i>We surely will, shipmate.</i>

52
00:06:11,247 --> 00:06:14,260
<i>Now relax,
your order is sailing your way</i>

53
00:06:55,541 --> 00:06:57,546
Welcome to Captain Crab, sir.

54
00:06:57,585 --> 00:06:59,590
Please take a seat.

55
00:06:59,837 --> 00:07:01,431
Hey dude.

56
00:07:01,672 --> 00:07:04,144
You look gorgeous.
She's gonna love you.

57
00:07:05,092 --> 00:07:06,682
This is it?

58
00:07:06,719 --> 00:07:07,727
What?

59
00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:11,392
You told me you'd booked me a table
in a world-class seafood restaurant.

60
00:07:11,432 --> 00:07:13,982
- And?
- This place is a dump.

61
00:07:14,018 --> 00:07:17,980
What the fuck are you talking about?
It's incredible. I eat here all the time.

62
00:07:18,022 --> 00:07:20,821
I've been waiting for this day
for 3 years, Bunny.

63
00:07:20,900 --> 00:07:24,246
I'm hardly going to tell Melanie I love her
in a Captain Crab.

64
00:07:24,320 --> 00:07:26,289
Hey, come on.

65
00:07:26,322 --> 00:07:29,252
I've saved you the best table
in the house, buddy.

66
00:07:29,325 --> 00:07:31,330
Hit the lights, Ray.

67
00:07:32,995 --> 00:07:36,459
Now, listen to me.
You're ready, all right? You're gorgeous.

68
00:07:36,498 --> 00:07:39,713
You've carried this girl's
library books for 3 years.

69
00:07:39,752 --> 00:07:42,469
You've even got a PhD to impress her,
for God's sake.

70
00:07:42,504 --> 00:07:45,601
If this piece of chicken
don't wanna work your joint after that,

71
00:07:45,633 --> 00:07:47,638
I'll cut off my right nut.

72
00:07:49,470 --> 00:07:51,273
Thank you.

73
00:07:52,181 --> 00:07:53,688
Fuck her, dude.

74
00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:57,980
The "Friend Zone".

75
00:07:58,020 --> 00:07:59,823
Well, it was 3 years.

76
00:07:59,855 --> 00:08:03,948
In my book, if you haven't had snogsies
by closing time it's game over.

77
00:08:03,984 --> 00:08:05,787
Maybe there's a way back.

78
00:08:05,819 --> 00:08:07,990
No way back from the Friend Zone,
dude.

79
00:08:08,030 --> 00:08:09,833
She doesn't see you as a sexual being.

80
00:08:09,865 --> 00:08:11,668
- But I am one.
- I know.

81
00:08:11,700 --> 00:08:13,041
I think you're gorgeous.

82
00:08:13,077 --> 00:08:16,589
So do loads of girls, just...
not in Britain.

83
00:08:16,622 --> 00:08:18,793
That's why we need to hit the road, man.

84
00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:21,550
Find ourselves a country
where you can do something about

85
00:08:21,585 --> 00:08:26,057
those walloping great Space Hoppers
you've got clanging around in your pants.

86
00:08:26,090 --> 00:08:27,680
I'm having a year off sex.

87
00:08:27,716 --> 00:08:29,104
Another one?

88
00:08:30,094 --> 00:08:32,015
Come on, man, give yourself a break.

89
00:08:32,054 --> 00:08:33,525
Let's go on holiday.

90
00:08:33,556 --> 00:08:35,358
I thought you were broke.

91
00:08:36,559 --> 00:08:38,813
All that's about to change.

92
00:08:41,313 --> 00:08:43,318
Who have you got in the 3:40 at Ripon?

93
00:08:43,399 --> 00:08:44,951
Future Proof.

94
00:08:45,401 --> 00:08:47,406
Atlantis Rising.

95
00:08:48,404 --> 00:08:51,121
- Are you mentally ill?
- That horse is a shoe-in.

96
00:08:51,198 --> 00:08:53,452
I know that horse.
It's 50-1 for a reason.

97
00:08:53,492 --> 00:08:55,248
Well...

98
00:08:56,245 --> 00:08:58,630
- Is this the Heindberg Theory again?
- No.

99
00:08:58,664 --> 00:09:02,010
There's no way the jockey with
the most aggressive face always wins.

100
00:09:02,042 --> 00:09:05,506
All right, you were right.
I've accepted that now, thank you.

101
00:09:05,546 --> 00:09:07,551
But this is a bona fide tip.

102
00:09:07,590 --> 00:09:09,642
Masouda reckons he's a dead cert.

103
00:09:09,675 --> 00:09:11,680
Who's Masouda?

104
00:09:11,719 --> 00:09:13,688
Remember when I was in the Yemen?

105
00:09:13,721 --> 00:09:16,568
Masouda's this really sexy
stable girl out there.

106
00:09:16,599 --> 00:09:20,062
And she says in training he's dynamite.

107
00:09:20,102 --> 00:09:22,950
They've been slow running him
just to get the odds up.

108
00:09:23,022 --> 00:09:26,236
And this is the race
they're gonna let that donkey fly.

109
00:09:26,275 --> 00:09:28,861
- Isn't that illegal?
- Massively illegal, dude.

110
00:09:28,903 --> 00:09:31,371
We'll probably go to jail. That's the point.

111
00:09:31,447 --> 00:09:33,416
Think about it - 50 quid at 50-1 .

112
00:09:33,449 --> 00:09:35,454
That's 2-and-a-half grand.

113
00:09:35,492 --> 00:09:39,799
Easily enough for a little jaunt round
Europe for a couple of fellas like us.

114
00:09:41,790 --> 00:09:43,593
All right, yeah, 50 quid on the nose.

115
00:09:43,626 --> 00:09:44,919
That's my boy.

116
00:09:44,960 --> 00:09:47,926
<i>Last bets, please.
Last bets for the 3:40 at Ripon.</i>

117
00:09:52,301 --> 00:09:54,306
When were you in the Yemen?

118
00:09:54,345 --> 00:09:56,350
Last summer.

119
00:09:56,388 --> 00:09:58,393
I thought you were on a fishing boat.

120
00:10:00,059 --> 00:10:02,064
Yeah... fishing boat in the Yemen.

121
00:10:02,519 --> 00:10:04,108
Right.

122
00:10:07,983 --> 00:10:12,206
The song that Yemenese fisher folk sing
almost constantly as they labour.

123
00:10:12,592 --> 00:10:14,284
Yeah. Good tune, that.

124
00:10:14,740 --> 00:10:16,328
How did it go?

125
00:10:19,161 --> 00:10:22,009
<i>* Wahey... fishy-fishy</i>

126
00:10:22,998 --> 00:10:25,928
<i>* Come onto the boat</i>

127
00:10:26,710 --> 00:10:29,130
<i>* Please come on</i>

128
00:10:29,171 --> 00:10:31,141
<i>* To the boat... why?</i>

129
00:10:31,173 --> 00:10:33,178
<i>* I don't know</i>

130
00:10:33,217 --> 00:10:36,729
<i>* Because we are hungry for our...</i>

131
00:10:36,762 --> 00:10:38,767
<i>* Tea</i>

132
00:10:38,806 --> 00:10:40,893
- There is no Masouda, is there?
- No.

133
00:10:40,933 --> 00:10:42,440
- Ever been to the Yemen?
- No.

134
00:10:42,518 --> 00:10:46,398
- This is the Heindberg Theory again.
- Fine, yes. But look at his face.

135
00:10:46,438 --> 00:10:48,444
That is one mean motherfucker.

136
00:10:48,524 --> 00:10:51,905
<i>There's the 50-1 outsider, Atlantis Rising,</i>

137
00:10:51,944 --> 00:10:55,824
<i>trying to get to know the favourite,
who doesn't seem to be having it</i>

138
00:10:55,864 --> 00:10:58,961
<i>And they're off.
A clean start apart from Atlantis Rising,</i>

139
00:10:58,993 --> 00:11:01,164
<i>who seems stuck
but finally gets underway</i>

140
00:11:01,203 --> 00:11:03,173
<i>The running's being made
by Future Proof,</i>

141
00:11:03,205 --> 00:11:05,969
<i>followed by Henley's A Washout
and Doodlebug Dreamer,</i>

142
00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:08,005
<i>while Atlantis Rising brings up the rear.</i>

143
00:11:08,043 --> 00:11:09,965
<i>As they head to the first fence,</i>

144
00:11:10,004 --> 00:11:13,598
<i>Future Proof is pulling away from
Henley's A Washout and Woggletok</i>

145
00:11:13,632 --> 00:11:18,354
<i>while the little fancied Atlantis Rising is
some way back and out of the running.</i>

146
00:11:18,387 --> 00:11:19,810
Useless. He's way back!

147
00:11:19,847 --> 00:11:22,433
They haven't let him fly yet.
They haven't let him fly.

148
00:11:22,474 --> 00:11:24,480
<i>...between himself and the field</i>

149
00:11:24,560 --> 00:11:27,194
<i>Atlantis Rising struggling way back</i>

150
00:11:35,821 --> 00:11:37,292
- Come on!
- Come on!

151
00:11:37,364 --> 00:11:39,369
<i>... whip has had an immediate effect</i>

152
00:11:39,408 --> 00:11:42,208
<i>A sterling run from Atlantis Rising,</i>

153
00:11:42,244 --> 00:11:45,174
<i>moving up through the field
to join the front runners.</i>

154
00:11:45,205 --> 00:11:47,293
<i>Almost neck and neck
with Future Proof.</i>

155
00:11:47,374 --> 00:11:49,214
One more! One more!

156
00:11:49,251 --> 00:11:50,841
Hit him harder!

157
00:11:50,878 --> 00:11:53,595
<i>Coming up to the 2nd to last
They land neck and neck</i>

158
00:11:54,215 --> 00:11:56,220
<i>The favourite is pulling away again.</i>

159
00:11:56,258 --> 00:11:58,014
<i>Future Proof has pulled away</i>

160
00:11:58,052 --> 00:12:00,306
- Don't do that.
- Come on. Come on.

161
00:12:00,387 --> 00:12:04,065
<i>Barring a miracle, it looks like
the favourite has won this race.</i>

162
00:12:06,268 --> 00:12:07,609
He's down!

163
00:12:07,645 --> 00:12:09,614
- Future Proof's down!
-He's fallen,

164
00:12:09,647 --> 00:12:13,527
<i>leaving a clear run now for the
50-1 outsider Atlantis Rising,</i>

165
00:12:13,609 --> 00:12:15,579
<i>who has taken the spoils.</i>

166
00:12:15,611 --> 00:12:17,616
Yeah!

167
00:12:21,951 --> 00:12:23,956
We did it, man! We did it!

168
00:12:23,994 --> 00:12:25,999
We did it. We did it.

169
00:12:26,038 --> 00:12:29,420
They're not gonna put that
other horse to sleep, are they?

170
00:12:29,458 --> 00:12:32,507
No. God, no, it's not the '60s.
They don't do that any more.

171
00:12:32,545 --> 00:12:35,891
Come on, why don't we grab a drink
while they count our cash?

172
00:14:06,055 --> 00:14:07,775
There we go.

173
00:14:11,852 --> 00:14:13,857
Where's your luggage?

174
00:14:16,649 --> 00:14:18,202
You're an idiot.

175
00:14:18,234 --> 00:14:22,623
The book says there are 31 essentials
you should always have about you.

176
00:14:22,655 --> 00:14:24,457
Money belt, passport, tickets, camera,

177
00:14:24,531 --> 00:14:26,169
bug spray, sun cream, flashlight, string,

178
00:14:26,200 --> 00:14:27,790
waterproof matches, lighter, tripod,

179
00:14:27,826 --> 00:14:29,666
life jacket, compass, maps, spare string,

180
00:14:29,745 --> 00:14:31,667
sleeping bag, ground sheet,
bivouac, jerry can,

181
00:14:31,747 --> 00:14:33,717
first-aid kit, loo roll,
spade, strong string,

182
00:14:35,834 --> 00:14:38,385
water pills, galoshes
and a personal flare.

183
00:14:41,006 --> 00:14:43,011
- Got any string?
- Yeah.

184
00:14:43,050 --> 00:14:45,055
Got plenty, actually.

185
00:14:45,094 --> 00:14:47,063
That's very funny. Very good.

186
00:14:47,096 --> 00:14:50,228
Fancy a tinny? A going-away present
from Captain Crab.

187
00:14:50,266 --> 00:14:52,401
- That's nice.
- When I say present...

188
00:14:52,434 --> 00:14:54,404
- You nicked them.
- I did.

189
00:14:54,436 --> 00:14:56,442
No, I'll make one of my cocktails.

190
00:14:56,480 --> 00:14:58,236
Not one of those things.

191
00:14:58,274 --> 00:15:01,239
- I thought you said you liked them.
- Yeah, but they take ages.

192
00:15:01,277 --> 00:15:02,617
So?

193
00:15:02,653 --> 00:15:06,247
By the time you've finished making that,
I will already be drunk.

194
00:15:06,282 --> 00:15:08,203
Care to make it interesting?

195
00:15:08,242 --> 00:15:09,796
Yeah, fiver.

196
00:15:09,827 --> 00:15:10,788
OK.

197
00:15:15,416 --> 00:15:17,385
Hey, look.

198
00:15:17,418 --> 00:15:19,423
We're moving.

199
00:15:30,723 --> 00:15:32,016
Cheers.

200
00:15:32,057 --> 00:15:33,481
Alka-Seltzer.

201
00:15:38,188 --> 00:15:40,194
What's this for?

202
00:15:40,232 --> 00:15:42,284
<i>Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome to France.</i>

203
00:15:42,318 --> 00:15:44,821
<i>Mesdames et messieurs,
bienvenue en France.</i>

204
00:15:44,862 --> 00:15:46,285
Yes!

205
00:15:46,322 --> 00:15:48,327
Fuck you, England!

206
00:15:53,141 --> 00:15:54,833
They are good, actually.

207
00:15:56,457 --> 00:15:58,462
I'm gonna have a little doze.

208
00:16:03,839 --> 00:16:05,809
- Where are we?
- Belgium.

209
00:16:05,841 --> 00:16:07,846
Europe is our oyster.

210
00:16:07,885 --> 00:16:09,890
Oysters!

211
00:16:09,929 --> 00:16:11,934
I need a bacon sandwich.

212
00:16:11,972 --> 00:16:13,977
So, come on, where do you fancy?

213
00:16:14,016 --> 00:16:16,946
This is your holiday, buddy.
I'm just your wing man.

214
00:16:17,978 --> 00:16:19,983
Then you are in for a treat.

215
00:16:20,856 --> 00:16:25,198
This is 1,500 pages of pure fun.

216
00:17:25,921 --> 00:17:27,926
Come on, girls, join us.

217
00:17:29,925 --> 00:17:31,930
Hi, Melanie.

218
00:17:33,012 --> 00:17:34,564
Great.

219
00:17:34,597 --> 00:17:37,562
We're having a really wonderful time,
me and Bunny.

220
00:17:38,267 --> 00:17:40,853
I wondered what you were...
what you're up to.

221
00:17:44,690 --> 00:17:46,278
Who with?

222
00:17:46,317 --> 00:17:48,997
You know,
I'm not really worried about it or...

223
00:17:49,028 --> 00:17:51,033
All right, well...

224
00:17:51,780 --> 00:17:55,624
I'll leave you with
a wish of a great evening.

225
00:17:55,659 --> 00:17:57,247
And...

226
00:18:00,789 --> 00:18:02,795
Bye.

227
00:18:06,837 --> 00:18:08,842
Hang on!

228
00:18:14,386 --> 00:18:15,560
Bunny!

229
00:18:15,596 --> 00:18:18,609
I said hang on! What's your beef?

230
00:18:18,641 --> 00:18:20,646
It's our stop.

231
00:18:20,684 --> 00:18:22,689
All right, I'm just finishing.

232
00:18:34,240 --> 00:18:35,828
My God!

233
00:18:35,866 --> 00:18:37,587
Finished!

234
00:18:40,829 --> 00:18:42,550
This better be good.

235
00:18:46,669 --> 00:18:48,638
<i>From the early sandal</i>

236
00:18:48,671 --> 00:18:50,676
<i>to the latest hi-tech trainer,</i>

237
00:18:50,714 --> 00:18:54,392
shoes have always been
top of the world's agenda.

238
00:18:54,426 --> 00:18:55,980
It's a big subject.

239
00:18:56,011 --> 00:18:59,808
There's obviously a hell of a lot to get
through in the next 3 or 4 hours,

240
00:18:59,848 --> 00:19:02,067
so let's start off with some of the basics.

241
00:19:02,101 --> 00:19:04,106
What is a shoe?

242
00:19:04,144 --> 00:19:07,490
Well, it's a hot topic
and no doubt that debate will rage on.

243
00:19:08,607 --> 00:19:10,695
But I find it's best to take things...

244
00:19:11,402 --> 00:19:13,074
one step at a time.

245
00:19:18,033 --> 00:19:19,836
Cobblers.

246
00:19:19,868 --> 00:19:23,795
Mind my language,
but we are in the cobbler's workshop...

247
00:19:23,831 --> 00:19:28,137
what I like to call the heart and sole
of the shoe museum.

248
00:19:29,169 --> 00:19:31,340
All kinds of shoe are made here.

249
00:19:31,380 --> 00:19:33,599
How many different types
can you name?

250
00:19:33,632 --> 00:19:35,684
Let's kick off with a couple.

251
00:19:36,886 --> 00:19:38,891
Clogs, moccasins,

252
00:19:39,555 --> 00:19:41,856
brogues, deck shoes,

253
00:19:41,891 --> 00:19:43,896
loafers, winklepickers...

254
00:19:43,934 --> 00:19:45,939
Are you having fun?

255
00:19:45,978 --> 00:19:47,568
Yes.

256
00:19:48,981 --> 00:19:51,116
You don't look like you're having fun.

257
00:19:51,150 --> 00:19:53,290
Well, I am.

258
00:19:54,028 --> 00:19:56,875
...rugby shoes, lacrosse shoes,

259
00:19:56,906 --> 00:19:58,377
ping-pong shoes...

260
00:19:58,407 --> 00:20:00,412
- What do you want to do?
- Eat.

261
00:20:00,492 --> 00:20:05,001
Fine. There's a place downstairs where
we can dine like 19th-century cobblers.

262
00:20:05,039 --> 00:20:07,044
Why would I want to do that?

263
00:20:07,082 --> 00:20:09,088
So you can learn while you eat.

264
00:20:09,126 --> 00:20:12,009
The only thing I want to learn
is just how much bacon

265
00:20:12,046 --> 00:20:15,723
one man can shovel into his cake hole
without falling into a coma.

266
00:20:15,758 --> 00:20:17,763
I should've gone to Denmark.

267
00:20:17,801 --> 00:20:19,355
Is a ski a shoe?

268
00:20:19,386 --> 00:20:21,391
Well, there are 2 camps-

269
00:20:21,430 --> 00:20:23,020
the "yes" camp,

270
00:20:23,057 --> 00:20:24,860
and the "probably not" camp.

271
00:20:24,934 --> 00:20:28,397
If I'm such a dead weight, why not
just go to Denmark without me?

272
00:20:28,437 --> 00:20:30,442
I'm not saying that.

273
00:20:30,522 --> 00:20:32,528
This is your holiday, buddy.

274
00:20:32,566 --> 00:20:35,034
I just think we need to
chance our arms a bit.

275
00:20:35,069 --> 00:20:37,074
Whatever you say.

276
00:20:37,112 --> 00:20:39,118
Right, give me your map.

277
00:20:40,407 --> 00:20:42,412
Now, this is where we're eating.

278
00:20:52,044 --> 00:20:53,634
How about that?

279
00:21:09,395 --> 00:21:12,859
Welcome to Captain Crab. He sails
the 7 seas so you don't have to.

280
00:21:16,819 --> 00:21:19,500
My name is Eloisa.
May I take your order, please?

281
00:21:19,572 --> 00:21:22,289
Yes, I'll have one
Harbour Master's Delight...

282
00:21:22,741 --> 00:21:24,661
1 glass of prawns...

283
00:21:28,789 --> 00:21:30,794
Hello, Captain Crab.

284
00:21:30,833 --> 00:21:33,632
Fuck you, Pawel, you son of a goat!

285
00:21:33,669 --> 00:21:36,350
You donkey fucker!
You bald-faced fuck!

286
00:21:36,380 --> 00:21:39,263
I'm going to chop off your penis
and put it in a sandwich.

287
00:21:39,300 --> 00:21:42,230
Then I will make an omelette
with your balls and feed it to you,

288
00:21:42,261 --> 00:21:45,393
so you know what your balls taste like
in an omelette...

289
00:21:45,431 --> 00:21:47,021
which is shit!

290
00:21:47,057 --> 00:21:48,979
I hope your father dies of cancer

291
00:21:49,018 --> 00:21:51,865
and your mother explodes
with a terrible period!

292
00:21:57,860 --> 00:22:00,363
the deep-fried calamari
and a cod shake.

293
00:22:04,450 --> 00:22:05,458
option.

294
00:22:08,245 --> 00:22:10,250
No, Pawel, I'm leaving.

295
00:22:10,289 --> 00:22:13,552
I've spent 2 months working
in your shitty restaurant,

296
00:22:13,626 --> 00:22:17,718
where the fish comes from a canal and
the chef pisses in the vegetarian option.

297
00:22:17,755 --> 00:22:19,842
And then you cheat on me!

298
00:22:19,882 --> 00:22:22,563
Fuck you, you bald,
fucking stumpy-dick monkey!

299
00:22:28,724 --> 00:22:30,943
Sorry. What was that?

300
00:22:31,602 --> 00:22:33,776
I'll just have a glass
of tap water, please.

301
00:22:40,653 --> 00:22:42,658
OK, let's go.

302
00:22:42,696 --> 00:22:44,701
She just argued with her boyfriend.

303
00:22:44,740 --> 00:22:47,326
This is Captain Crab, dude.
He has standards.

304
00:22:49,578 --> 00:22:51,708
That was prompt.

305
00:22:51,747 --> 00:22:54,464
They make all the food on Monday
and keep it warm.

306
00:22:57,461 --> 00:22:59,182
You can't eat that.

307
00:22:59,213 --> 00:23:01,716
- Who says I can't?
- Look at it.

308
00:23:01,757 --> 00:23:04,972
I don't want to look at it.
If I look at it, I will bottle it.

309
00:23:05,010 --> 00:23:08,392
Look at it. It's trying to
move on your fork. Look at it.

310
00:23:11,246 --> 00:23:12,772
My God!

311
00:23:13,477 --> 00:23:15,778
I think it's trying
to communicate with me.

312
00:23:15,813 --> 00:23:17,818
I really think we should go.

313
00:23:19,441 --> 00:23:20,380
Bunny!

314
00:23:25,573 --> 00:23:27,741
Hang on a minute.

315
00:23:29,577 --> 00:23:31,582
These fellas look all right.

316
00:23:32,955 --> 00:23:34,960
I'm not gonna watch you kill a crab.

317
00:23:34,999 --> 00:23:37,633
I'm not gonna kill 'em.
I've got a better idea.

318
00:23:39,712 --> 00:23:42,392
Trzy, dwa, jeden...

319
00:23:50,222 --> 00:23:51,645
Come on!

320
00:23:52,266 --> 00:23:53,856
Yeah!

321
00:24:17,625 --> 00:24:19,630
You should go talk to her.

322
00:24:19,668 --> 00:24:20,961
What?

323
00:24:21,003 --> 00:24:23,008
She was looking at you.

324
00:24:23,047 --> 00:24:25,052
No, I don't think that she was.

325
00:24:25,090 --> 00:24:28,270
Well... Come on,
you fucking lazy crustacean!

326
00:24:36,352 --> 00:24:38,653
Yeah, well, maybe I'll just get some air.

327
00:24:46,508 --> 00:24:48,200
Sorry, sorry.

328
00:24:48,239 --> 00:24:50,041
Excuse me.

329
00:24:50,783 --> 00:24:52,539
Do you have a light?

330
00:24:53,786 --> 00:24:55,542
What?

331
00:24:56,205 --> 00:24:58,175
Do you have a light?

332
00:24:58,207 --> 00:25:00,212
Fuego?
- Yes.

333
00:25:00,251 --> 00:25:03,050
Yes, I do, actually, as a matter of fact.

334
00:25:03,837 --> 00:25:05,640
Yeah.

335
00:25:13,722 --> 00:25:15,727
If you ever want any welding done...

336
00:25:17,059 --> 00:25:19,064
Welding?

337
00:25:19,103 --> 00:25:21,439
It's when you join bits of metal together.

338
00:25:22,523 --> 00:25:24,694
Why would I want to do that?

339
00:25:24,733 --> 00:25:27,118
No, you wouldn't.
It was more about the...

340
00:25:27,152 --> 00:25:29,158
I was referring to the blowtorch.

341
00:25:29,238 --> 00:25:31,208
It was a... joke.

342
00:25:31,240 --> 00:25:33,245
It was very funny.

343
00:25:33,909 --> 00:25:35,914
Can I borrow that?

344
00:25:46,672 --> 00:25:48,677
So... do you...

345
00:25:48,716 --> 00:25:50,721
go out after work?

346
00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:53,766
Is that the sort of thing you do?

347
00:25:54,763 --> 00:25:57,646
Are you going to go to a bar or anything?

348
00:25:57,683 --> 00:25:59,688
- No.
- Good.

349
00:25:59,727 --> 00:26:01,530
Good.

350
00:26:02,563 --> 00:26:05,944
I'm going back home to Spain
for a fiesta.

351
00:26:06,775 --> 00:26:08,496
Tonight?

352
00:26:08,527 --> 00:26:10,532
Yeah.

353
00:26:11,363 --> 00:26:13,499
I don't know how I'm going to get there.

354
00:26:14,158 --> 00:26:16,163
But I will.

355
00:26:18,454 --> 00:26:20,459
Fiesta is wild.

356
00:26:21,498 --> 00:26:24,880
People come from miles around
to see the bullfighting.

357
00:26:25,502 --> 00:26:27,508
And they go crazy.

358
00:26:27,546 --> 00:26:29,551
They drink a lot, they dance a lot.

359
00:26:30,299 --> 00:26:32,269
They make poo, they make wee.

360
00:26:32,301 --> 00:26:34,887
They make love in the street.

361
00:26:36,347 --> 00:26:37,355
Yeah.

362
00:26:37,389 --> 00:26:39,359
It sounds awful.

363
00:26:40,184 --> 00:26:43,482
Well... it's a good thing
I didn't invite you along, then.

364
00:26:45,105 --> 00:26:47,986
But I mean it sounds fascinating,
anthropologically.

365
00:26:49,005 --> 00:26:51,112
Anthropologically, it's incredible.

366
00:26:58,911 --> 00:27:00,916
Well...

367
00:27:00,955 --> 00:27:02,960
I'd better be going.

368
00:27:10,548 --> 00:27:12,553
See you around.

369
00:27:13,384 --> 00:27:14,974
"See you around"?

370
00:27:15,010 --> 00:27:17,976
You were gone for ages.
I thought you were getting your balls in.

371
00:27:20,140 --> 00:27:24,067
What are you still doing here?
You should be halfway to Spain by now.

372
00:27:24,144 --> 00:27:27,656
- What could I have done?
- Got a car, given her a lift.

373
00:27:27,690 --> 00:27:29,777
How would I get a car?

374
00:27:30,734 --> 00:27:32,537
Leave that to me.

375
00:27:32,570 --> 00:27:34,871
- Bunny...
- Hush now! You're in disgrace.

376
00:27:36,490 --> 00:27:37,664
Right!

377
00:27:38,867 --> 00:27:43,459
Which one of you tinpot Polacks
wants to raise the stakes?

378
00:28:09,523 --> 00:28:10,911
Jedz.

379
00:28:29,585 --> 00:28:31,590
I need fucking lemon! Lemon!

380
00:28:45,434 --> 00:28:46,905
Just one more.

381
00:28:48,646 --> 00:28:50,283
Come on!

382
00:28:57,446 --> 00:28:58,620
Yeah!

383
00:29:02,076 --> 00:29:03,250
Yeah!

384
00:29:14,713 --> 00:29:16,516
Who's your daddy?

385
00:29:16,549 --> 00:29:18,351
I didn't want a car.

386
00:29:18,384 --> 00:29:20,603
You don't know what you want.

387
00:29:20,636 --> 00:29:23,353
All right now. Just be cool.

388
00:29:25,057 --> 00:29:26,445
- Hey.
- Hey.

389
00:29:26,475 --> 00:29:29,061
- Fancy a lift?
- We thought we'd check out the fiesta.

390
00:29:29,520 --> 00:29:33,991
I thought you didn't like wine or
dancing or making love in the street.

391
00:29:34,984 --> 00:29:38,116
We've had enough of the crabs.
We wanna bet on the bulls.

392
00:29:38,153 --> 00:29:39,328
Yes.

393
00:29:39,363 --> 00:29:41,368
OK.

394
00:29:41,407 --> 00:29:43,412
Thanks.

395
00:29:44,285 --> 00:29:46,290
All right, dude, relax.

396
00:29:46,328 --> 00:29:48,832
- Talk to her. You'll be fine.
- OK.

397
00:29:48,872 --> 00:29:52,883
Just don't go into another long rant
about the demise of the semicolon.

398
00:29:52,918 --> 00:29:53,927
Right.

399
00:29:53,961 --> 00:29:56,761
Girls don't like grammar chat.
You know that now.

400
00:29:57,214 --> 00:29:59,478
And try and keep your lips moist.

401
00:29:59,508 --> 00:30:03,305
You have a tendency to get very dry
around the mouth area.

402
00:30:03,345 --> 00:30:04,686
Do I?

403
00:30:04,722 --> 00:30:07,142
Try not to do that thing you do
when you're nervous,

404
00:30:07,182 --> 00:30:08,985
when you clear your throat all the time.

405
00:30:09,018 --> 00:30:10,987
- What do you mean?
- You know.

406
00:30:11,645 --> 00:30:13,784
"Hello, my name's Stephen."

407
00:30:13,814 --> 00:30:15,451
I don't do that.

408
00:30:15,524 --> 00:30:17,494
You do do that, dude. Sorry.

409
00:30:17,526 --> 00:30:21,157
But whatever you do,
don't go into the Friend Zone.

410
00:30:21,780 --> 00:30:23,536
What's the Friend Zone?

411
00:30:23,574 --> 00:30:25,579
It's nothing to worry about.

412
00:30:26,869 --> 00:30:30,048
Right... let's see what this baby can do.

413
00:30:41,654 --> 00:30:43,394
Hey, dude. Hey, dude.

414
00:30:44,053 --> 00:30:46,058
Hey, dude. Hey, dude.

415
00:30:46,722 --> 00:30:48,145
What?

416
00:30:48,182 --> 00:30:52,358
4 o'clock, dude. Nearly time
for the big race. Got a dead cert.

417
00:30:52,394 --> 00:30:54,399
I've had too many of your dead certs.

418
00:30:54,438 --> 00:30:57,784
I've won on horses, I've won on crabs.
What more do you want?

419
00:30:57,816 --> 00:31:01,280
Just nip down the bookies.
It'll only take you 5 minutes.

420
00:31:01,362 --> 00:31:03,367
Unless you can't leave the house.

421
00:31:03,948 --> 00:31:05,205
I can.

422
00:31:05,241 --> 00:31:07,577
Go on, then. I bet you.

423
00:31:08,285 --> 00:31:09,792
All right.

424
00:32:07,261 --> 00:32:09,266
Hey, dude.

425
00:32:09,305 --> 00:32:11,808
You weren't gonna leave me
out there, were you?

426
00:32:14,581 --> 00:32:16,482
Yeah, yeah.

427
00:32:16,520 --> 00:32:19,320
I love what you've done with the place,
by the way.

428
00:32:19,356 --> 00:32:21,029
Little tip for you.

429
00:32:21,066 --> 00:32:24,946
I think what you need is more boxes
filled with random old shit.

430
00:32:24,987 --> 00:32:27,122
It's important to stay organised.

431
00:32:27,156 --> 00:32:29,375
I take it you're not entertaining much.

432
00:32:30,075 --> 00:32:32,661
Not that women don't love boxes.

433
00:32:32,703 --> 00:32:34,708
I mean, what is all this shit?

434
00:32:34,747 --> 00:32:36,752
Stamps, rubber bands...

435
00:32:38,542 --> 00:32:40,797
drinking straws '95-'96.

436
00:32:40,836 --> 00:32:43,636
Yeah, that was a vintage year
for the old straw.

437
00:32:43,672 --> 00:32:45,787
Please, Bunny, just leave them.

438
00:32:45,925 --> 00:32:48,890
- Captain Crab. Bingo!
- Put it back!

439
00:32:48,928 --> 00:32:51,015
Please don't be a vegetarian option.

440
00:32:51,055 --> 00:32:53,060
It's not food.

441
00:32:53,515 --> 00:32:55,104
Maps.

442
00:32:56,560 --> 00:32:58,148
I remember these.

443
00:33:03,859 --> 00:33:05,864
<i>* jaunty tune</i>

444
00:34:08,841 --> 00:34:10,846
Jesus!

445
00:34:10,885 --> 00:34:13,768
I've just worked out
that if all these bets come in,

446
00:34:13,804 --> 00:34:15,809
I'm gonna win...

447
00:34:18,434 --> 00:34:20,770
£3.4 billion.

448
00:34:22,021 --> 00:34:23,658
Are you fucking my face?

449
00:34:23,689 --> 00:34:25,445
I am not fucking your face.

450
00:34:27,151 --> 00:34:31,208
Obviously they're all long shots,
but I am feeling lucky today.

451
00:34:32,489 --> 00:34:34,495
I think you will win.

452
00:34:34,575 --> 00:34:36,580
Yeah? Why's that?

453
00:34:36,619 --> 00:34:40,676
Because yesterday a gypsy sold me
afoot of a rabbit.

454
00:34:40,706 --> 00:34:43,506
She said it will bring luck to me
and all my friends.

455
00:34:43,584 --> 00:34:45,589
Maybe you will win £1 billion.

456
00:34:45,628 --> 00:34:47,633
- Primo!
- Primo!

457
00:34:57,264 --> 00:34:59,269
A rabbit's foot.

458
00:35:00,476 --> 00:35:02,481
Yeah. They are very lucky.

459
00:35:04,271 --> 00:35:06,276
Not for the rabbit.

460
00:35:06,315 --> 00:35:07,905
What?

461
00:35:07,942 --> 00:35:10,445
- Let it go, dude.
- I said, not for the rabbit.

462
00:35:10,486 --> 00:35:14,080
On account of the rabbit
being killed and dismembered.

463
00:35:14,114 --> 00:35:16,120
No, lucky for me.

464
00:35:16,158 --> 00:35:18,662
I don't know about the rabbit.
Maybe he is OK.

465
00:35:18,702 --> 00:35:20,458
Maybe he is happy.

466
00:35:20,496 --> 00:35:22,501
A happy hoppy.

467
00:35:26,961 --> 00:35:29,641
- Dude...
- Just rabbits, or would any animal do -

468
00:35:29,672 --> 00:35:31,474
a dog, kangaroo, a cat...

469
00:35:31,507 --> 00:35:32,350
Cat?

470
00:35:32,445 --> 00:35:35,189
What are you, a silly bottom?
Cats are very unlucky.

471
00:35:35,219 --> 00:35:36,809
In Spain, if you step on a cat,

472
00:35:36,845 --> 00:35:39,314
you have to spit on him
or it's very bad luck.

473
00:35:39,348 --> 00:35:41,852
What? I did that yesterday.
What'll happen?

474
00:35:41,892 --> 00:35:43,315
- You will die.
- Die?

475
00:35:43,352 --> 00:35:44,823
We've gotta turn around.

476
00:35:44,853 --> 00:35:47,322
I'm not turning around
so you can spit on a cat.

477
00:35:47,356 --> 00:35:49,491
- I'm gonna die.
- No-one's going to die.

478
00:35:49,525 --> 00:35:51,909
Don't worry, I have the San Cristóbal.

479
00:35:51,944 --> 00:35:52,860
What?

480
00:35:52,861 --> 00:35:56,824
If you believe in St. Christopher,
you will not die. It's stronger than a cat.

481
00:35:57,178 --> 00:35:58,871
Thank God.

482
00:35:58,909 --> 00:36:00,332
No.

483
00:36:00,682 --> 00:36:02,837
My fucking God.
Where is my St. Christopher?

484
00:36:02,871 --> 00:36:06,004
- Have you stolen him?
- Have you stolen her St. Christopher?

485
00:36:06,041 --> 00:36:08,461
- I haven't taken anything.
- Pull over.

486
00:36:08,502 --> 00:36:10,507
We have to find it! We need to find it.

487
00:36:10,546 --> 00:36:13,844
I don't know if you are really aware
what is happening here.

488
00:36:13,883 --> 00:36:16,979
If we don't find my St. Christopher,
we're going to die!

489
00:36:17,011 --> 00:36:20,190
- You have to pull over! Pull over, buddy!
- Stop the car!

490
00:36:20,222 --> 00:36:22,441
Stop this!

491
00:36:24,560 --> 00:36:28,522
The only thing that's going to cause
an accident is you two larking around!

492
00:36:28,564 --> 00:36:30,569
Sit down and shut up!

493
00:36:31,692 --> 00:36:33,697
I am not pulling over!

494
00:36:51,921 --> 00:36:54,851
- Why are you pulling over, dude?
- Need some petrol.

495
00:36:57,176 --> 00:36:58,979
Bit embarrassing...

496
00:37:00,012 --> 00:37:02,017
after your little speech.

497
00:37:06,852 --> 00:37:08,715
A quiet word, dude.

498
00:37:10,606 --> 00:37:12,693
Why are you fucking this up?

499
00:37:12,733 --> 00:37:14,453
Fucking what up?

500
00:37:14,485 --> 00:37:16,869
So she's got a few lucky charms.
So what?

501
00:37:19,281 --> 00:37:20,753
Come on, man.

502
00:37:20,783 --> 00:37:23,997
You finally meet someone you stand
a chance with and what do you do?

503
00:37:24,620 --> 00:37:29,092
You crawl straight into the Friend Zone
like a scaredy little guinea pig.

504
00:37:29,124 --> 00:37:32,138
Listen. I'm not interested. OK?

505
00:37:32,878 --> 00:37:36,425
Even if I did like her, which I don't,
I'm having a year off sex.

506
00:37:36,465 --> 00:37:38,553
So just back off. OK?

507
00:37:38,676 --> 00:37:40,728
All right.

508
00:37:40,761 --> 00:37:42,849
Won't say another word.

509
00:37:47,017 --> 00:37:49,983
All I'm saying is, we don't want
another Melanie on our hands.

510
00:37:50,020 --> 00:37:52,025
I'm not you, Bunny.

511
00:37:52,064 --> 00:37:56,121
I don't have to fuck something
every 5 minutes, like a dog with a bone.

512
00:37:56,151 --> 00:37:58,239
OK. Jesus.

513
00:38:00,364 --> 00:38:02,499
I'm sorry.

514
00:38:03,242 --> 00:38:07,501
He has gone.
I am not going to drive, very unlucky.

515
00:38:08,122 --> 00:38:10,803
It's all right.
We don't need a St. Christopher.

516
00:38:10,833 --> 00:38:14,546
St. Stephen will drive.
He's very safe.

517
00:39:36,460 --> 00:39:38,181
Come on in.

518
00:39:38,733 --> 00:39:41,059
You've got a lovely big bear.

519
00:39:41,090 --> 00:39:44,720
- Yes, I'm beating her tomorrow.
- What for?

520
00:39:45,427 --> 00:39:47,515
For being a bad bear.

521
00:39:48,681 --> 00:39:49,724
Really?

522
00:39:50,224 --> 00:39:53,605
No, you bloody idiot.
To get the dust off her.

523
00:39:53,852 --> 00:39:56,782
Come through. You 3 are upstairs.

524
00:39:56,814 --> 00:40:01,156
I don't know who's doing what with whom,
so I've given you 3 singles.

525
00:40:04,113 --> 00:40:05,785
- Night, dude.
- Night-night.

526
00:40:05,823 --> 00:40:07,744
- Night.
- Night.

527
00:40:08,492 --> 00:40:10,580
- Good night, baby.
- Night.

528
00:40:19,503 --> 00:40:22,351
<i>* Snowing outside</i>

529
00:40:25,676 --> 00:40:30,397
<i>* In the garden here now</i>

530
00:40:40,524 --> 00:40:43,621
<i>* A thousand years will pass</i>

531
00:40:47,072 --> 00:40:49,124
<i>* But still I won't know...</i>

532
00:41:01,879 --> 00:41:03,966
Just a minute.

533
00:41:06,050 --> 00:41:07,616
Hey, dude.

534
00:41:08,677 --> 00:41:10,018
Hi.

535
00:41:10,471 --> 00:41:12,141
Are you after Eloisa?

536
00:41:12,556 --> 00:41:14,526
No, no. No, I just...

537
00:41:14,808 --> 00:41:18,901
wondered if you needed
any laundry done?

538
00:41:19,480 --> 00:41:20,654
Laundry?

539
00:41:20,689 --> 00:41:22,825
Yeah. Good idea.

540
00:41:32,159 --> 00:41:33,870
Hang on.

541
00:41:39,208 --> 00:41:41,295
There she is.

542
00:41:41,919 --> 00:41:42,857
Great.

543
00:41:44,463 --> 00:41:46,551
Well, I'll just go and put a load on.

544
00:41:48,968 --> 00:41:50,638
Listen, dude.

545
00:41:50,886 --> 00:41:52,726
You haven't got a johnny, have you?

546
00:41:52,763 --> 00:41:54,519
What for?

547
00:41:54,557 --> 00:41:56,277
"What for?"

548
00:41:56,204 --> 00:41:58,029
Right. Yes.

549
00:41:58,060 --> 00:42:00,279
Yeah, I think me and Eloisa
are about to...

550
00:42:01,105 --> 00:42:03,192
get it together.

551
00:42:03,399 --> 00:42:05,486
Great. Good.

552
00:42:06,151 --> 00:42:07,991
Yep. Well, I do, yes, as a matter of fact.

553
00:42:09,989 --> 00:42:11,495
Great. Cheers, buddy.

554
00:42:12,157 --> 00:42:14,545
You haven't got any more,
have you?

555
00:42:15,911 --> 00:42:17,382
Sure.

556
00:42:20,040 --> 00:42:21,880
Thanks, man.

557
00:42:22,209 --> 00:42:24,345
I don't wanna take the piss here,
but...

558
00:42:24,378 --> 00:42:26,383
- Why don't you just take the lot?
- Great.

559
00:42:31,260 --> 00:42:32,936
That's brilliant.

560
00:42:35,744 --> 00:42:37,856
What have you got
all these for, dude?

561
00:42:38,934 --> 00:42:41,948
Well, I just thought
if you were bored...

562
00:42:42,271 --> 00:42:45,368
you might want to have a...
water fight.

563
00:42:48,986 --> 00:42:51,287
All right. Come here.

564
00:42:56,035 --> 00:42:58,125
That does me good.

565
00:42:59,955 --> 00:43:02,043
- Night, dude.
- Night-night.

566
00:43:03,959 --> 00:43:07,388
Hey. Maybe we could have
that water fight tomorrow, yeah?

567
00:43:07,421 --> 00:43:09,058
- Great.
- Yeah.

568
00:43:09,089 --> 00:43:12,553
If there's any johnnies left!
There should be. There should be.

569
00:43:27,149 --> 00:43:30,578
Hi, Melanie. Hi, Neil.

570
00:43:33,030 --> 00:43:36,826
Sorry, Neil, I know I said
I wouldn't call again, but is Melanie...

571
00:43:39,286 --> 00:43:43,343
Well, send her my... best.

572
00:43:55,115 --> 00:43:56,639
Dude.

573
00:43:56,679 --> 00:43:58,766
Dude, wake up.

574
00:43:59,348 --> 00:44:00,309
What?

575
00:44:00,349 --> 00:44:02,817
Got you a present. Come with me.

576
00:44:05,437 --> 00:44:08,071
Come along, then, bear.
It's time for your beating.

577
00:44:09,275 --> 00:44:10,662
Who are you?

578
00:44:14,029 --> 00:44:17,375
You gotta love the bear.
She's all yours, buddy.

579
00:44:17,408 --> 00:44:19,247
Sign of our friendship.

580
00:44:19,285 --> 00:44:21,005
But you stole it, Bunny.

581
00:44:21,036 --> 00:44:24,465
It's fine. People take shit from hotels
all the time. Lighten up.

582
00:44:39,388 --> 00:44:41,358
Come on, dude. Put your foot down.

583
00:44:41,390 --> 00:44:42,980
The limit's 50.

584
00:44:43,017 --> 00:44:45,236
Everyone knows you can
get away with 10 per cent.

585
00:44:45,269 --> 00:44:47,274
Is true.

586
00:44:52,484 --> 00:44:55,830
You're right.
Let's all just do what we want.

587
00:45:06,227 --> 00:45:07,717
Fuck.

588
00:45:07,750 --> 00:45:09,802
I'm so sorry.

589
00:45:09,835 --> 00:45:13,715
This is what happens
when you don't have a St. Christopher.

590
00:45:13,756 --> 00:45:16,224
I know. I'm sorry, really.
I just lost control.

591
00:45:16,258 --> 00:45:18,144
You were going so slowly.

592
00:45:18,177 --> 00:45:20,312
I know.
I think maybe I'm a little bit drunk.

593
00:45:20,346 --> 00:45:21,220
Drunk?

594
00:45:21,222 --> 00:45:23,108
- You're drinking and driving?
- No.

595
00:45:23,140 --> 00:45:25,644
I mean, I had a few last night,
but I'm sure I slept it off.

596
00:45:25,684 --> 00:45:27,357
- Drinking alone, dude?
- How sure?

597
00:45:27,394 --> 00:45:29,031
- I'm pretty sure.
- "Pretty sure"?

598
00:45:29,063 --> 00:45:29,917
Yes.

599
00:45:30,022 --> 00:45:32,234
Pretty sure is not good enough,
not for the police.

600
00:45:33,943 --> 00:45:36,742
- My God. I'm going to prison.
- You're not going to prison.

601
00:45:36,779 --> 00:45:38,451
I'm going to prison. I'll be raped.

602
00:45:38,489 --> 00:45:40,825
- No-one's going to be raped.
- This is Switzerland!

603
00:45:40,866 --> 00:45:43,583
- These people are Nazis.
- They're not. They were neutral.

604
00:45:43,619 --> 00:45:47,083
Their neutrality was a charade.
Their banks are full of Jewish gold.

605
00:45:47,122 --> 00:45:48,795
He's right. He's fucked.

606
00:45:48,832 --> 00:45:51,253
All right, so we might have
a slight situation here.

607
00:45:51,293 --> 00:45:54,591
Listen. Bunny, will you please tell them
that you were driving?

608
00:45:54,630 --> 00:45:56,635
- No way, dude.
- Why not?

609
00:45:56,674 --> 00:45:59,308
- I'm hammered.
- So you're drinking alone?

610
00:45:59,343 --> 00:46:02,024
- Hey, I'm not driving.
- What are we going to do?

611
00:46:10,396 --> 00:46:13,575
- Listen, darling...
- Are you fucking my face?

612
00:46:13,607 --> 00:46:16,193
- No, I'm...
- You are fucking my face!

613
00:46:16,235 --> 00:46:18,821
Well, maybe slightly,
but we're in a bit of a pickle here.

614
00:46:20,760 --> 00:46:22,458
OK.

615
00:46:24,910 --> 00:46:28,754
So I was driving on ice, I skid,
and I hit a tree.

616
00:46:28,789 --> 00:46:30,794
Exactly. Could happen to anyone.

617
00:46:30,833 --> 00:46:32,968
- Thank you so much.
- OK, OK, OK.

618
00:46:33,002 --> 00:46:35,422
But you'd better get
out of here right now.

619
00:46:35,462 --> 00:46:38,559
A woman alone they can believe,
but not you 2 fucknuts.

620
00:46:38,591 --> 00:46:42,434
Cheers, babe. Listen, see if you can
get the van fixed while you're in town.

621
00:46:42,469 --> 00:46:46,610
And... if you pass a bookies,
there's a horse running in the...

622
00:46:46,953 --> 00:46:49,274
OK. Here.
Just... we're going.

623
00:46:51,270 --> 00:46:53,275
See you in town, baby.

624
00:46:54,481 --> 00:46:58,112
Hey! And take your fucking bear
with you.

625
00:47:09,163 --> 00:47:11,132
Why do you have to ruin everything?

626
00:47:11,165 --> 00:47:14,012
- What the fuck did I do?
- I didn't need this!

627
00:47:14,043 --> 00:47:16,546
Everything was just where I wanted it.

628
00:47:16,587 --> 00:47:18,343
We're finding loads of great stuff. Look.

629
00:47:18,380 --> 00:47:21,892
- Here's all your old combs.
- I'm not gonna do this any more.

630
00:47:21,926 --> 00:47:24,096
- Can I have them?
- Just leave me alone.

631
00:47:34,188 --> 00:47:36,193
Hello.

632
00:47:38,025 --> 00:47:40,030
Yes. Hello! Please...

633
00:47:40,069 --> 00:47:42,288
Thank you.

634
00:47:53,958 --> 00:47:55,963
I need 5 minutes.

635
00:47:56,001 --> 00:47:58,931
- We've got to leave the bear.
- What? No way.

636
00:47:58,963 --> 00:48:02,593
Then keep moving.
Eloisa will be in town by now.

637
00:48:08,514 --> 00:48:09,937
Hello.

638
00:48:11,976 --> 00:48:15,238
Hello. We're trying to get to town.

639
00:48:15,271 --> 00:48:19,067
Do you know anywhere
we can get a taxi or a bus?

640
00:48:19,108 --> 00:48:21,077
Bus?

641
00:48:21,110 --> 00:48:22,284
No.

642
00:48:22,319 --> 00:48:24,621
Or a taxi?

643
00:48:24,655 --> 00:48:27,123
Taxi? No.

644
00:48:27,366 --> 00:48:28,748
Christ!

645
00:48:29,660 --> 00:48:31,630
I like.

646
00:48:31,662 --> 00:48:33,797
Very beautiful.

647
00:48:34,790 --> 00:48:36,795
Can I have?

648
00:48:36,834 --> 00:48:39,468
No, no. Mrs. Brown stays with us.

649
00:48:41,630 --> 00:48:43,849
Come, come with me.

650
00:48:43,883 --> 00:48:46,433
Food, shelter, good times. Come.

651
00:48:47,553 --> 00:48:49,558
Follow me. Come along.

652
00:48:49,597 --> 00:48:52,859
This right way. Here we go.

653
00:48:52,892 --> 00:48:56,320
- I'm not sure about this.
- Come on, it will be fine.

654
00:49:00,149 --> 00:49:04,704
Welcome to my home.
Simple home. Sorry for mess.

655
00:49:05,258 --> 00:49:06,872
Take seat.

656
00:49:07,907 --> 00:49:10,042
Not there! Over there.

657
00:49:10,701 --> 00:49:12,706
In lounge.

658
00:49:24,465 --> 00:49:26,600
Nice... warm milk.

659
00:49:26,634 --> 00:49:28,639
It's delicious.

660
00:49:28,677 --> 00:49:29,769
From dog.

661
00:49:34,767 --> 00:49:36,854
You not like my milk?

662
00:49:36,894 --> 00:49:41,864
No, not at all.
It's just I'm more used to cow's milk.

663
00:49:48,489 --> 00:49:50,541
This milk from cow.

664
00:49:56,705 --> 00:49:58,592
This is Cow.

665
00:50:00,376 --> 00:50:03,056
She has most productive teat
of all my bitches.

666
00:50:03,608 --> 00:50:05,174
Great.

667
00:50:25,943 --> 00:50:27,200
Now you.

668
00:50:30,406 --> 00:50:32,746
You haven't got anything else,
have you?

669
00:50:39,331 --> 00:50:41,336
You not like Cow?

670
00:50:41,917 --> 00:50:43,969
Not really, no.

671
00:50:50,134 --> 00:50:52,602
Can of medium strength lager?

672
00:50:54,138 --> 00:50:56,148
Yeah. Great. Thanks.

673
00:50:59,101 --> 00:51:00,489
- Cheers.
- Cheers.

674
00:51:07,443 --> 00:51:08,866
<i>* Mathilda goes woof!</i>

675
00:51:10,988 --> 00:51:12,874
<i>* Svetlana say woof!</i>

676
00:51:15,284 --> 00:51:17,002
Good times!

677
00:51:18,495 --> 00:51:22,636
After I'd been sick a couple of times,
I actually started to quite like that milk.

678
00:51:22,666 --> 00:51:25,596
- Not bad, these dogs.
- It's getting late, though, man.

679
00:51:25,628 --> 00:51:27,467
We ought to push off.

680
00:51:27,504 --> 00:51:30,055
We're gonna have to say
goodbye, Wooffles.

681
00:51:36,847 --> 00:51:39,184
I see what is going on here.

682
00:51:39,516 --> 00:51:41,189
Yeah. All night I watch you.

683
00:51:41,227 --> 00:51:42,650
Flirting.

684
00:51:42,686 --> 00:51:44,442
What are you talking about?

685
00:51:44,480 --> 00:51:47,114
And now you want to fuck her?

686
00:51:47,316 --> 00:51:48,443
Your dog?

687
00:51:49,526 --> 00:51:52,112
Shut your mouth, you tainted bitch!

688
00:51:52,154 --> 00:51:54,871
Honestly,
I really don't want to sleep with her.

689
00:51:55,282 --> 00:51:58,130
Then why you make explosion
in your trouser?

690
00:51:58,369 --> 00:51:59,833
Dude.

691
00:52:00,037 --> 00:52:00,954
Jesus.

692
00:52:00,955 --> 00:52:03,672
I'm sorry. It was cold,
she was lying against me, I...

693
00:52:03,707 --> 00:52:05,594
I don't know.

694
00:52:05,626 --> 00:52:08,046
You fuck my wife?

695
00:52:08,087 --> 00:52:09,890
I fuck your wife.

696
00:52:09,922 --> 00:52:11,559
I haven't got a wife.

697
00:52:13,008 --> 00:52:15,689
And who is this beautiful woman here?

698
00:52:15,719 --> 00:52:19,777
Hey. You keep your hands off her.

699
00:52:20,015 --> 00:52:21,603
Big man?

700
00:52:22,768 --> 00:52:24,524
Big curly man.

701
00:52:24,562 --> 00:52:26,738
You gonna fight me for her?

702
00:52:26,981 --> 00:52:28,950
I'll bet you for her.

703
00:52:28,983 --> 00:52:30,655
Bet?

704
00:52:30,693 --> 00:52:32,579
Yeah, you know,
you got any playing cards?

705
00:52:32,611 --> 00:52:35,245
Dice? Couple of conkers?

706
00:52:35,281 --> 00:52:38,495
I don't play these games.
I am man - real man.

707
00:52:38,534 --> 00:52:40,539
All right, then.

708
00:52:41,912 --> 00:52:43,383
See that island over there?

709
00:52:44,039 --> 00:52:48,299
I bet I can swim to that island
under the ice.

710
00:52:49,461 --> 00:52:51,052
This is impossible.

711
00:52:51,088 --> 00:52:53,556
- No man can do this.
- Well, we'll see.

712
00:52:53,591 --> 00:52:55,809
And if I make it, we keep the bear.

713
00:52:55,843 --> 00:52:57,646
If not...

714
00:52:58,304 --> 00:53:00,190
you may do with her as you wish.

715
00:53:01,307 --> 00:53:02,813
Just a quick word.

716
00:53:03,163 --> 00:53:04,855
What the fuck are you doing?

717
00:53:06,520 --> 00:53:08,193
You can do this, can't you?

718
00:53:09,106 --> 00:53:11,692
Well, I don't know. That's why it's a bet.

719
00:53:13,903 --> 00:53:15,030
Deal?

720
00:53:20,200 --> 00:53:22,040
Deal.

721
00:53:24,163 --> 00:53:26,000
Good strong arms.

722
00:53:26,040 --> 00:53:28,674
Perhaps we will be fucking later.

723
00:53:54,026 --> 00:53:56,113
That's nice.

724
00:53:57,613 --> 00:53:59,832
Who am I to stand in the way of love?

725
00:54:02,451 --> 00:54:04,670
You would like to lie with her, yes?

726
00:54:06,121 --> 00:54:07,628
Maybe later.

727
00:54:07,665 --> 00:54:11,924
She is warm and clean.
I clean her myself this morning.

728
00:54:17,716 --> 00:54:20,101
How are you feeling?

729
00:54:25,307 --> 00:54:27,478
Your friend is dead.

730
00:54:28,227 --> 00:54:30,446
Drowned. I'm sorry.

731
00:54:30,479 --> 00:54:32,780
It is you and I now.

732
00:54:33,732 --> 00:54:35,369
There is nothing we can do for him.

733
00:55:16,817 --> 00:55:18,868
Man. How about that?

734
00:55:19,320 --> 00:55:21,325
Keep going, we're nearly there.

735
00:55:21,363 --> 00:55:23,000
Incredible!

736
00:55:23,032 --> 00:55:26,164
One man risking his life,
all for the beauty of a bet.

737
00:55:26,410 --> 00:55:27,792
2.

738
00:55:28,704 --> 00:55:30,674
2 men risked their lives.

739
00:55:30,706 --> 00:55:31,750
Yeah.

740
00:55:31,790 --> 00:55:33,593
I'm telling you, buddy,

741
00:55:33,626 --> 00:55:35,428
there's no way back from here.

742
00:55:35,461 --> 00:55:37,548
I feel like I've finally become a man.

743
00:55:37,901 --> 00:55:39,391
Real man!

744
00:55:41,258 --> 00:55:44,472
My God, she actually
got that thing started.

745
00:55:45,095 --> 00:55:47,563
Where the fuck have you two been?

746
00:55:47,598 --> 00:55:49,899
Are we going to this fiesta or not?

747
00:55:49,934 --> 00:55:51,689
Just a sec, baby. Listen.

748
00:55:51,727 --> 00:55:54,064
I won't be pissing around
in the bookies any more.

749
00:55:54,104 --> 00:55:56,690
I'm raising the stakes.
When we get to Spain,

750
00:55:56,732 --> 00:55:58,784
I'm gonna fight a bull.

751
00:56:06,325 --> 00:56:08,377
If you really want to be a toreador,

752
00:56:08,410 --> 00:56:10,462
you should talk to my brother.

753
00:56:10,496 --> 00:56:12,715
Cos I remember,
when we were growing up,

754
00:56:12,748 --> 00:56:15,334
all he would ever talk about
was bullfighting.

755
00:56:15,897 --> 00:56:17,796
It sounds great.

756
00:56:17,836 --> 00:56:20,091
He's technically retarded.

757
00:56:20,381 --> 00:56:22,509
We're supposed to be having fun.

758
00:56:22,550 --> 00:56:24,270
Bullfighting is fun.

759
00:56:24,301 --> 00:56:28,228
There's plenty we can do that doesn't
involve the slaughter of an animal.

760
00:56:28,264 --> 00:56:29,557
You're so naive.

761
00:56:29,598 --> 00:56:32,018
Name me one thing
that could be half as much fun

762
00:56:32,059 --> 00:56:33,862
as doing battle with an angry cow.

763
00:56:33,894 --> 00:56:36,279
- Fairground.
- Fairground?

764
00:56:36,313 --> 00:56:39,528
I love fairgrounds.
There's one in the next town.

765
00:56:39,567 --> 00:56:42,746
- Cool.
- We're not stopping for a fairground?

766
00:56:42,778 --> 00:56:45,079
Who said you get to decide
where we stop?

767
00:56:45,114 --> 00:56:47,831
If you two want to go to a fairground,
be my guest.

768
00:56:47,866 --> 00:56:50,584
But count me out.
I'm serious about this, dude.

769
00:56:50,619 --> 00:56:54,250
I'm in training.
For tomorrow, I shall fight a bull.

770
00:56:54,957 --> 00:56:56,250
Olé!

771
00:57:27,114 --> 00:57:29,119
Come on, you'll like this.

772
00:57:29,158 --> 00:57:30,997
OK.

773
00:57:42,922 --> 00:57:44,927
What's going on?

774
00:57:44,965 --> 00:57:47,017
Don't worry, it's an old ride.

775
00:57:47,259 --> 00:57:49,020
No, this is odd.

776
00:57:49,053 --> 00:57:50,690
No, it's fine.

777
00:57:50,721 --> 00:57:52,358
Listen, there's...

778
00:57:55,059 --> 00:57:58,357
OK, so this is a bit odd, actually.

779
00:57:59,271 --> 00:58:01,276
What do we do?

780
00:58:01,315 --> 00:58:03,320
I don't know.

781
00:58:04,443 --> 00:58:06,448
Have a drink?

782
00:58:06,487 --> 00:58:08,492
We might be a while.

783
00:58:09,240 --> 00:58:11,209
You want?

784
00:58:11,242 --> 00:58:13,247
No, thanks, I've got my own.

785
00:58:21,502 --> 00:58:23,305
What are those things?

786
00:58:24,088 --> 00:58:26,093
You should try one.

787
00:58:26,131 --> 00:58:28,101
I don't know.

788
00:58:28,133 --> 00:58:30,139
You'll like it.

789
00:58:30,177 --> 00:58:32,313
It's very blue.

790
00:58:32,763 --> 00:58:34,351
And very tasty.

791
00:58:36,976 --> 00:58:38,648
<i>*Me pasé parala noch></i>

792
00:58:39,520 --> 00:58:41,691
<i>* De la cama, dáte pim pom</i>

793
00:58:41,730 --> 00:58:45,741
<i>* De la cama, dáte pim pom...
* Pim pom...</i>

794
00:58:53,993 --> 00:58:55,416
So...

795
00:58:55,452 --> 00:58:57,837
you must be looking forward
to going home.

796
00:58:57,913 --> 00:58:59,337
Yes.

797
00:59:01,208 --> 00:59:04,138
I never wanted to go travelling
in the first place.

798
00:59:04,920 --> 00:59:06,925
So why did you?

799
00:59:06,964 --> 00:59:08,969
It wasn't my idea.

800
00:59:09,008 --> 00:59:10,977
It was Concita.

801
00:59:11,010 --> 00:59:12,730
Who's Concita?

802
00:59:14,597 --> 00:59:18,689
OK, so one night in the fiesta,
when I was...

803
00:59:20,102 --> 00:59:22,107
15,

804
00:59:22,187 --> 00:59:24,868
I had lots of drinks, lots of trippies,

805
00:59:24,899 --> 00:59:27,034
and I was walking home alone.

806
00:59:27,067 --> 00:59:29,037
And my shadow froze...

807
00:59:29,069 --> 00:59:31,074
like this.

808
00:59:33,032 --> 00:59:36,959
So I said, "Hey, are you going
to come with me or what?"

809
00:59:37,578 --> 00:59:39,583
And my shadow...

810
00:59:39,622 --> 00:59:41,424
does this.

811
00:59:43,125 --> 00:59:44,548
And I do this.

812
00:59:45,252 --> 00:59:46,676
She was like...

813
00:59:46,712 --> 00:59:48,100
I was like...

814
00:59:48,130 --> 00:59:50,135
We were like...

815
00:59:51,926 --> 00:59:53,931
for 3 hours.

816
00:59:56,430 --> 00:59:59,313
It wasn't as much fun
as it sounds, actually, but.

817
00:59:59,350 --> 01:00:01,355
This is Concita.

818
01:00:02,269 --> 01:00:04,274
The first time I see her.

819
01:00:05,105 --> 01:00:06,778
Right.

820
01:00:08,108 --> 01:00:10,410
After this, I start to see her many times.

821
01:00:11,445 --> 01:00:14,791
And she says
that she knows everything -

822
01:00:15,491 --> 01:00:19,038
what places I should go,
what men I should see...

823
01:00:21,205 --> 01:00:22,593
Everything.

824
01:00:22,623 --> 01:00:24,628
And she took me to Poland.

825
01:00:26,794 --> 01:00:28,799
But she's a hallucination.

826
01:00:28,837 --> 01:00:30,593
No, Concita is real.

827
01:00:30,631 --> 01:00:32,636
Concita is always with me.

828
01:00:32,675 --> 01:00:34,680
Is she here now?

829
01:00:36,136 --> 01:00:37,727
No.

830
01:00:37,763 --> 01:00:39,602
She doesn't like you.

831
01:00:40,349 --> 01:00:42,354
She's on the dodgems.

832
01:00:42,393 --> 01:00:43,864
What did I do?

833
01:00:45,646 --> 01:00:47,651
Nothing. You're really nice.

834
01:00:47,690 --> 01:00:50,537
But she sees you more like a...
like a friend.

835
01:00:50,568 --> 01:00:52,573
You know, like a brother...

836
01:00:52,611 --> 01:00:54,616
or a gaylord.

837
01:00:54,655 --> 01:00:56,660
Right.

838
01:00:56,699 --> 01:00:58,704
Does she like Bunny?

839
01:00:58,742 --> 01:01:00,747
Yes.

840
01:01:01,579 --> 01:01:03,584
She loves Bunny.

841
01:01:03,622 --> 01:01:05,627
She thinks he's...

842
01:01:05,666 --> 01:01:07,671
hot stuff.

843
01:01:08,669 --> 01:01:10,472
Right.

844
01:01:11,422 --> 01:01:14,519
Sometimes I think
she has very bad taste in men.

845
01:01:20,514 --> 01:01:23,314
Home time. Here we go.

846
01:02:22,952 --> 01:02:26,831
At last! Where the hell have you been?
I've had to entertain your guests.

847
01:02:26,872 --> 01:02:29,173
- Food!
- I've told you, there is no food.

848
01:02:29,208 --> 01:02:31,593
- Bowl for dog!
- Top cupboard, there.

849
01:02:37,216 --> 01:02:40,063
- Bloody junkie!
- What's she doing here?

850
01:02:40,094 --> 01:02:42,977
- She's a figment of your imagination.
- Figment?

851
01:02:43,013 --> 01:02:45,778
- Yeah, we're all in his head.
- I'm not. I am real.

852
01:02:45,808 --> 01:02:47,813
What do you think you're doing here?

853
01:02:48,477 --> 01:02:50,447
Holiday? Good times?

854
01:02:50,479 --> 01:02:54,406
Holiday? You think they'd let you
through Customs looking like that?

855
01:02:56,944 --> 01:02:58,949
Where's he gone?

856
01:03:01,782 --> 01:03:03,787
Come on, dude. We're having fun.

857
01:04:27,326 --> 01:04:29,331
Come on, dude. Let's hit the bars.

858
01:04:29,370 --> 01:04:31,671
Stephen, come with us to the fiesta.

859
01:04:35,793 --> 01:04:38,806
Yeah, I'm going to introduce you
to my brother. Ai!

860
01:04:38,837 --> 01:04:40,309
Paulo.

861
01:04:57,690 --> 01:04:59,659
Hey, Javier!

862
01:04:59,692 --> 01:05:01,697
It's my beautiful sister!

863
01:05:03,070 --> 01:05:05,075
Look at you.

864
01:05:05,114 --> 01:05:07,119
You look wonderful.

865
01:05:07,157 --> 01:05:09,127
Do you think she looks sexy?

866
01:05:09,159 --> 01:05:10,203
Sí.

867
01:05:10,286 --> 01:05:12,338
How dare you? She's only 23.

868
01:05:13,163 --> 01:05:15,797
Get the hell out of my bar, filthy pervert.

869
01:05:18,085 --> 01:05:20,090
Que haces, Javier?

870
01:05:20,129 --> 01:05:22,810
A small amount for medicinal purposes.

871
01:05:22,840 --> 01:05:25,224
Que no deberías beber.
Te lo dijo el doctor.

872
01:05:25,259 --> 01:05:26,685
The doctor!

873
01:05:28,470 --> 01:05:30,522
Maybe I could get you a lime and soda.

874
01:05:37,021 --> 01:05:39,026
Yes, that would be very lovely.

875
01:05:39,064 --> 01:05:41,283
Very refreshing on a hot day like today.

876
01:05:45,112 --> 01:05:48,458
Which one of you is making
the bulls and cows with my sister?

877
01:05:48,490 --> 01:05:50,293
That's me, matador.

878
01:05:50,326 --> 01:05:53,956
It's been a long time since anyone
called me this. But it's true.

879
01:05:53,996 --> 01:05:56,464
I once dreamed of becoming
a great matador.

880
01:05:56,498 --> 01:05:58,504
But...

881
01:05:58,542 --> 01:06:00,761
sadly...

882
01:06:01,420 --> 01:06:03,559
Gored in the leg.

883
01:06:04,882 --> 01:06:06,887
I fell back onto a coffee table.

884
01:06:08,490 --> 01:06:10,146
Right.

885
01:06:12,848 --> 01:06:14,853
Only you English call it fighting.

886
01:06:14,892 --> 01:06:17,526
For us in Spain, it is a dance.

887
01:06:18,145 --> 01:06:19,533
A dance?

888
01:06:19,563 --> 01:06:22,695
You see, when the matador
enters the ring with the bull,

889
01:06:22,733 --> 01:06:25,414
there is a moment when
everything disappears,

890
01:06:26,445 --> 01:06:28,497
and the bull looks up at the matador,

891
01:06:28,530 --> 01:06:30,618
and the matador looks down at the bull.

892
01:06:32,159 --> 01:06:36,750
And the bull rises up onto his hind legs,

893
01:06:36,789 --> 01:06:39,553
grabs the matador close
with his silver hooves,

894
01:06:40,209 --> 01:06:42,214
and for a moment they dance...

895
01:06:42,253 --> 01:06:45,634
in only the way a bull and a man
can dance.

896
01:06:46,590 --> 01:06:47,931
Yes, my friend.

897
01:06:47,967 --> 01:06:50,600
It's not a fight. It is a dance.

898
01:06:53,055 --> 01:06:55,309
I thought the main attraction

899
01:06:55,349 --> 01:07:00,106
was the sight of a defenceless animal
being stabbed repeatedly with a sword.

900
01:07:03,274 --> 01:07:05,610
It is a peculiar dance, I'll give you this.

901
01:07:05,651 --> 01:07:10,408
But it is a dance, nevertheless.
Let me show you something.

902
01:07:14,785 --> 01:07:17,122
This belonged to Juan Belmonte,

903
01:07:17,830 --> 01:07:20,131
the greatest bullfighter who ever lived.

904
01:07:21,500 --> 01:07:23,505
He tried to retire many times.

905
01:07:24,962 --> 01:07:26,967
But he could not stop.

906
01:07:27,631 --> 01:07:31,688
Even on his 69th birthday,
he still wants to face the bulls.

907
01:07:32,928 --> 01:07:34,933
He asks his friends to bring him one.

908
01:07:35,973 --> 01:07:37,978
But they fear he will be killed

909
01:07:38,017 --> 01:07:40,022
and so they make excuses.

910
01:07:41,061 --> 01:07:43,066
And they bring him a small one.

911
01:07:43,105 --> 01:07:47,067
They say, "Juan...
all the big bulls, they are sick."

912
01:07:48,944 --> 01:07:50,949
But he knows in his heart...

913
01:07:51,739 --> 01:07:53,958
his life as a torero is over.

914
01:07:56,243 --> 01:07:58,248
So this night...

915
01:07:58,287 --> 01:08:00,292
he drinks 3 bottles of wine...

916
01:08:01,540 --> 01:08:03,545
makes love with 2 womans...

917
01:08:05,002 --> 01:08:07,007
takes a gun...

918
01:08:07,046 --> 01:08:09,051
and he shoots himself.

919
01:08:16,180 --> 01:08:20,142
This is what it means to be a matador.

920
01:08:23,562 --> 01:08:25,199
Can I try it on?

921
01:08:26,232 --> 01:08:29,411
Maybe in 10 years, when you have
faced a thousand bulls.

922
01:08:29,443 --> 01:08:32,825
Then you'll come back,
I open the cabinet,

923
01:08:32,863 --> 01:08:34,868
and you can maybe touch...

924
01:08:34,907 --> 01:08:36,912
the hem of the inside pocket.

925
01:08:39,411 --> 01:08:40,883
Will you teach me?

926
01:08:41,580 --> 01:08:42,672
No.

927
01:08:45,459 --> 01:08:47,464
Hip flask of tequila?

928
01:08:49,296 --> 01:08:51,301
Meet me in the car park at midnight.

929
01:09:01,600 --> 01:09:05,397
Because of the complicated techniques
involved in bullfighting,

930
01:09:05,437 --> 01:09:09,281
it can take up to 10 years
to become a fully-trained matador.

931
01:09:10,109 --> 01:09:12,410
Unfortunately, we only have 10 minutes,

932
01:09:12,444 --> 01:09:15,707
as I have to pick up my auntie
from the airport.

933
01:09:15,739 --> 01:09:18,919
I know what you are thinking -
we have no bull.

934
01:09:18,951 --> 01:09:20,956
Well, think again.

935
01:09:23,914 --> 01:09:28,221
Now, much has been written
about the art of bullfighting.

936
01:09:28,252 --> 01:09:30,257
But I can sum it up in one sentence.

937
01:09:30,296 --> 01:09:32,550
"Get out of the way of the bull, you idiot!

938
01:09:33,257 --> 01:09:35,309
Otherwise he will rip open your anus,

939
01:09:35,342 --> 01:09:37,561
like it was a cheap Velcro wallet."

940
01:09:38,304 --> 01:09:40,309
I will now become the bull.

941
01:10:01,827 --> 01:10:03,832
What are you doing?

942
01:10:03,871 --> 01:10:05,876
Use the cape! Fucking idiot!

943
01:10:06,665 --> 01:10:08,920
What are you,
a child in a swimming pool?

944
01:10:08,959 --> 01:10:11,677
Cover his head! Eloisa!

945
01:10:11,712 --> 01:10:13,717
Eloisa, go and get your auntie.

946
01:10:13,756 --> 01:10:15,761
She's at Terminal 4.

947
01:10:28,270 --> 01:10:31,948
I've been wanting to say thank you
for the St. Christopher.

948
01:10:35,027 --> 01:10:38,206
Yeah, I... I sort of guessed
it wasn't from Bunny

949
01:10:38,280 --> 01:10:40,700
when he tried to put it
in a slot machine.

950
01:10:43,202 --> 01:10:44,839
Well...

951
01:10:44,870 --> 01:10:46,875
you're welcome.

952
01:10:46,914 --> 01:10:48,919
Thank you.

953
01:10:49,875 --> 01:10:53,387
So... where do you see
this thing with Bunny going?

954
01:10:55,381 --> 01:10:56,342
Well...

955
01:10:56,382 --> 01:11:00,439
I don't think Bunny is the sort of person
you really make plans with.

956
01:11:00,511 --> 01:11:01,899
Yeah.

957
01:11:01,929 --> 01:11:03,186
You know...

958
01:11:03,222 --> 01:11:06,853
Concita always said
I should sleep with 12 people.

959
01:11:08,018 --> 01:11:10,023
13 would be very bad luck.

960
01:11:10,729 --> 01:11:12,569
And Pawel was number 12.

961
01:11:12,606 --> 01:11:16,367
That's why I stayed in Poland,
even when I found out that he was a...

962
01:11:16,402 --> 01:11:18,621
donkey-fucking prick.

963
01:11:20,197 --> 01:11:21,585
But then...

964
01:11:22,408 --> 01:11:25,587
I start to think
that maybe Concita's not right.

965
01:11:26,954 --> 01:11:29,422
Maybe she is just scared of number 13.

966
01:11:32,084 --> 01:11:34,635
Maybe I'm scared of number 13.

967
01:11:36,881 --> 01:11:38,601
Maybe.

968
01:11:42,219 --> 01:11:44,059
Anyway...

969
01:11:44,096 --> 01:11:47,228
I realise, once I get over number 13,

970
01:11:47,266 --> 01:11:49,271
I can start looking again.

971
01:11:50,853 --> 01:11:53,273
Bunny is a perfect number 13.

972
01:12:30,017 --> 01:12:32,022
I should go and find Bunny.

973
01:12:34,480 --> 01:12:36,070
OK.

974
01:12:40,236 --> 01:12:42,241
Buenas noches.

975
01:12:43,614 --> 01:12:45,619
Good night.

976
01:12:47,910 --> 01:12:49,915
Hey.

977
01:12:52,456 --> 01:12:53,667
Hey.

978
01:13:06,887 --> 01:13:08,690
Put it back.

979
01:13:08,722 --> 01:13:11,937
If you want to be a bullfighter,
you've got to dress like one.

980
01:13:11,976 --> 01:13:13,981
I'll put it back when I've done it.

981
01:13:14,019 --> 01:13:16,238
You're not going to fight a bull, Bunny.

982
01:13:16,939 --> 01:13:18,944
I most certainly am. Why not?

983
01:13:19,650 --> 01:13:22,236
Because it's dangerous
and cruel and insane.

984
01:13:22,903 --> 01:13:24,908
I don't want to kill it.

985
01:13:24,947 --> 01:13:27,664
I just want to have
a little dance with it, yeah?

986
01:13:28,325 --> 01:13:30,330
It's not the bull I'm worried about.

987
01:13:30,369 --> 01:13:32,172
OK?

988
01:13:32,204 --> 01:13:34,505
Why are you always beefing on
about this?

989
01:13:34,540 --> 01:13:38,763
Just trying to stop you doing something
that could get you seriously hurt.

990
01:13:38,794 --> 01:13:42,507
No, you're not. You've been boring
my tits off since Switzerland.

991
01:13:42,548 --> 01:13:45,395
You used to be fun.
What the hell happened to you?

992
01:13:46,093 --> 01:13:47,683
Yeah, well...

993
01:13:49,388 --> 01:13:51,358
There is something.

994
01:13:51,703 --> 01:13:53,894
Finally. Come on, then.

995
01:13:56,604 --> 01:13:58,406
I'm in love with someone.

996
01:13:58,480 --> 01:14:00,283
Yeah, I know. Melanie.

997
01:14:00,316 --> 01:14:01,787
No, not Melanie.

998
01:14:05,738 --> 01:14:07,577
Someone else.

999
01:14:11,139 --> 01:14:12,831
Right.

1000
01:14:18,209 --> 01:14:19,797
Yeah...

1001
01:14:22,213 --> 01:14:24,299
Man. I'm sorry, Stephen.

1002
01:14:26,133 --> 01:14:28,138
I guess it's a...

1003
01:14:29,178 --> 01:14:31,183
bit awkward.

1004
01:14:32,640 --> 01:14:34,442
I know.

1005
01:14:35,351 --> 01:14:37,237
I mean, I'm flattered.

1006
01:14:37,269 --> 01:14:38,990
What?

1007
01:14:39,021 --> 01:14:43,530
I'll do snogsies for the wank bank, but
I've got to draw the line at penetration.

1008
01:14:43,567 --> 01:14:45,822
- That's so messy.
- It's not you, Bunny!

1009
01:14:46,174 --> 01:14:48,365
Thank God!
You're not just saying that?

1010
01:14:48,405 --> 01:14:51,086
Not everyone wants to
sleep with you, you know.

1011
01:14:51,784 --> 01:14:53,789
Or are you so profoundly...

1012
01:14:55,788 --> 01:14:59,252
- You know what? It doesn't matter.
- No, go on. You're on your high horse.

1013
01:14:59,291 --> 01:15:02,009
You may as well talk down to me
while you're up there.

1014
01:15:05,005 --> 01:15:09,098
Can you name one thing you've ever
done for anybody other than yourself?

1015
01:15:09,134 --> 01:15:10,606
Yeah, loads.

1016
01:15:10,636 --> 01:15:11,847
Go on, then.

1017
01:15:12,972 --> 01:15:14,977
Not off the top of my head.

1018
01:15:15,015 --> 01:15:16,771
Thank you.

1019
01:15:16,809 --> 01:15:18,612
At least I do something.

1020
01:15:18,644 --> 01:15:21,990
At least I didn't spend 3 years
mooning after some girl

1021
01:15:22,022 --> 01:15:24,027
who isn't even that good in the sack.

1022
01:15:29,655 --> 01:15:30,616
What?

1023
01:15:32,366 --> 01:15:34,371
Well, yeah.

1024
01:15:34,410 --> 01:15:38,467
You spent so long banging on about her,
I thought I'd better give it a go.

1025
01:15:38,497 --> 01:15:41,131
Let me tell you,
I was severely disappointed.

1026
01:15:42,835 --> 01:15:45,619
You're not missing out on
anything there, buddy.

1027
01:15:46,630 --> 01:15:48,137
You're unbelievable.

1028
01:15:49,216 --> 01:15:52,929
Do you know what? I'm fucking sick
of being patronised by you.

1029
01:15:53,012 --> 01:15:55,480
If I wanna borrow this suit,
then I will, OK?

1030
01:15:55,514 --> 01:15:58,148
If I wanna fight a bull, then I will.

1031
01:15:58,183 --> 01:16:01,861
And if some hombre's caught your eye,
then just man up and tuck in.

1032
01:16:01,896 --> 01:16:03,983
No-one's gonna judge you here, dude.

1033
01:16:04,023 --> 01:16:05,529
This is Spain.

1034
01:16:05,608 --> 01:16:07,862
Let's all just do what we want, shall we?

1035
01:16:07,902 --> 01:16:08,945
Deal.

1036
01:17:10,297 --> 01:17:11,973
Melanie?

1037
01:17:12,007 --> 01:17:14,344
Hey, dude. Hope you're cool with this.

1038
01:17:14,385 --> 01:17:16,224
Just doing what I want.

1039
01:17:16,262 --> 01:17:17,899
Sorry.

1040
01:17:17,930 --> 01:17:20,813
There was nothing I could do.
She just went for him.

1041
01:17:20,891 --> 01:17:22,896
Dirty girl!

1042
01:17:25,729 --> 01:17:27,734
Hey, we both wanted to do this.

1043
01:17:27,773 --> 01:17:29,743
She real slut.

1044
01:17:29,775 --> 01:17:32,409
Chill out, dude.
Just do what you want.

1045
01:17:41,537 --> 01:17:43,340
Stephen.

1046
01:17:44,373 --> 01:17:46,461
Everything all right?

1047
01:18:02,975 --> 01:18:06,238
Hang on. I've got my foot
caught in your panties.

1048
01:18:11,859 --> 01:18:13,955
Nice penis.

1049
01:18:14,299 --> 01:18:15,991
Thanks.

1050
01:18:16,030 --> 01:18:17,832
No, I mean it.

1051
01:18:17,865 --> 01:18:19,870
Good size, good weight.

1052
01:18:19,950 --> 01:18:21,955
It's much better than Bunny's.

1053
01:18:22,786 --> 01:18:25,041
Right... that's good to know.

1054
01:18:25,080 --> 01:18:27,086
What's your problem?

1055
01:18:27,166 --> 01:18:31,425
I'd rather not think about him right now,
at this particular juncture.

1056
01:18:34,506 --> 01:18:36,512
What?

1057
01:18:36,550 --> 01:18:38,555
Let's just fuck, OK?

1058
01:18:39,220 --> 01:18:40,810
OK.

1059
01:18:44,850 --> 01:18:46,855
Here goes.

1060
01:18:54,714 --> 01:18:56,613
Bunny.

1061
01:18:56,654 --> 01:18:59,240
- Bunny!
- Right, that's it.

1062
01:18:59,281 --> 01:19:02,045
It's coming out. Yeah, funny.

1063
01:19:02,076 --> 01:19:04,081
I'm just kidding.

1064
01:19:04,119 --> 01:19:06,125
Really, Stephen...

1065
01:19:06,205 --> 01:19:08,175
this is nice.

1066
01:19:08,207 --> 01:19:10,046
Yeah?

1067
01:19:10,918 --> 01:19:12,555
Yes.

1068
01:19:14,797 --> 01:19:16,802
Dude.

1069
01:19:18,050 --> 01:19:19,058
Dude!

1070
01:19:23,222 --> 01:19:24,515
Dude.

1071
01:19:26,141 --> 01:19:28,443
So you finally got your balls in.

1072
01:19:29,061 --> 01:19:30,484
What?

1073
01:19:32,106 --> 01:19:33,867
God.

1074
01:19:33,899 --> 01:19:36,035
Yeah, Bunny, look, I'm really sorry.

1075
01:19:36,068 --> 01:19:38,322
It just happened. I didn't mean...

1076
01:19:38,362 --> 01:19:41,577
Well, I did mean for it to happen,
but I should've spoken to you...

1077
01:19:43,242 --> 01:19:45,247
Hey, it's fine.

1078
01:19:45,286 --> 01:19:47,291
It's not as if she's my girlfriend.

1079
01:19:48,122 --> 01:19:49,712
Really?

1080
01:19:49,748 --> 01:19:51,385
Yeah.

1081
01:19:51,417 --> 01:19:53,422
It's what we came here for, isn't it?

1082
01:19:54,670 --> 01:19:56,675
Proud of you, man.

1083
01:19:59,341 --> 01:20:00,599
Thanks.

1084
01:20:00,634 --> 01:20:03,434
Hey... that's what
friends are for, dude.

1085
01:20:15,608 --> 01:20:16,782
Bunny?

1086
01:20:19,278 --> 01:20:21,283
Why is your face so close to mine?

1087
01:20:22,531 --> 01:20:24,536
What you talking about?

1088
01:20:25,200 --> 01:20:27,206
It's unnaturally close.

1089
01:20:27,286 --> 01:20:30,798
Yeah, this is what's wrong
with the world, isn't it?

1090
01:20:30,831 --> 01:20:34,592
A couple of buddies can't cuddle up
together in the middle of the night

1091
01:20:34,627 --> 01:20:36,383
without tongues wagging,

1092
01:20:36,420 --> 01:20:38,425
people judging...

1093
01:20:38,464 --> 01:20:40,469
- Have you been drinking?
- Yes.

1094
01:20:41,508 --> 01:20:44,094
Look, Bunny,
can you just get off me, please?

1095
01:20:46,305 --> 01:20:48,310
My God. Why are you naked?

1096
01:20:50,142 --> 01:20:52,147
Yeah, I had a bit of bad luck.

1097
01:20:52,811 --> 01:20:54,567
What happened?

1098
01:20:54,605 --> 01:20:56,325
Where's the suit?

1099
01:20:56,982 --> 01:20:58,738
I can't lie to you, dude.

1100
01:20:58,776 --> 01:21:00,697
I lost it to a fat gypsy.

1101
01:21:00,736 --> 01:21:02,029
What?

1102
01:21:02,112 --> 01:21:04,118
It wasn't my fault. He cheated.

1103
01:21:04,657 --> 01:21:06,662
Well, I'm pretty sure he cheated.

1104
01:21:06,700 --> 01:21:09,500
Either that
or he's just really good at cards.

1105
01:21:09,536 --> 01:21:11,506
- You've got to get it back.
- No dice, dude.

1106
01:21:11,538 --> 01:21:13,544
The fucker wouldn't
let me keep my pants.

1107
01:21:13,582 --> 01:21:15,801
Technically that's not even
part of the suit.

1108
01:21:15,834 --> 01:21:19,465
But you try reasoning with
a big fat gypsy at 4 am in the nuddy-nud.

1109
01:21:19,505 --> 01:21:22,388
- It can't be done, dude.
- Javier's gonna go mental.

1110
01:21:22,424 --> 01:21:23,604
I know.

1111
01:21:23,842 --> 01:21:26,560
I know he's gonna go mental.

1112
01:21:26,595 --> 01:21:30,024
That's why we've gotta get out of here
before he wakes up. Pack!

1113
01:21:32,434 --> 01:21:34,274
I'm not going,

1114
01:21:34,353 --> 01:21:35,943
Bunny.

1115
01:21:38,274 --> 01:21:39,864
What?

1116
01:21:41,527 --> 01:21:43,164
Sorry.

1117
01:21:43,195 --> 01:21:45,200
Come on, buddy.

1118
01:21:46,407 --> 01:21:48,412
You've gotta help me out here.

1119
01:21:49,243 --> 01:21:51,248
I'm staying.

1120
01:21:54,415 --> 01:21:56,420
You can't abandon me.

1121
01:21:57,668 --> 01:21:59,673
Look at me.

1122
01:22:00,880 --> 01:22:02,885
I need you.

1123
01:22:09,054 --> 01:22:11,059
I'm sorry.

1124
01:22:12,766 --> 01:22:14,772
At least give me some pants.

1125
01:22:14,810 --> 01:22:16,815
And buy me a train ticket.

1126
01:22:18,397 --> 01:22:20,402
Give me some pants, dude.

1127
01:22:21,400 --> 01:22:23,405
Give me some pants!

1128
01:22:30,659 --> 01:22:32,664
Train's not for a couple of hours.

1129
01:22:39,543 --> 01:22:43,423
Sure I can't tempt you
into one last little drinkie?

1130
01:22:43,464 --> 01:22:46,347
I've got to go, Bunny.

1131
01:22:46,383 --> 01:22:48,388
I want to be there when she wakes up.

1132
01:22:49,553 --> 01:22:51,309
Explain what's happened.

1133
01:22:53,224 --> 01:22:55,394
Look, why don't I give her a call?

1134
01:22:55,434 --> 01:22:57,439
Bunny, don't.

1135
01:22:57,478 --> 01:23:00,443
Seriously, I'll explain what happened.

1136
01:23:00,481 --> 01:23:03,067
I'll smooth things over. It'll be fine.

1137
01:23:03,108 --> 01:23:04,200
Really.

1138
01:23:06,153 --> 01:23:08,158
Please.

1139
01:23:09,573 --> 01:23:11,413
OK.

1140
01:23:14,245 --> 01:23:15,537
Well...

1141
01:23:16,372 --> 01:23:18,377
Have a good trip.

1142
01:23:19,541 --> 01:23:21,547
Yeah, you too.

1143
01:23:24,171 --> 01:23:26,176
I hope everything works out for you.

1144
01:23:37,935 --> 01:23:39,940
- Sí?
- Eloisa.

1145
01:23:39,979 --> 01:23:41,900
It's Bunny

1146
01:23:41,939 --> 01:23:44,525
Listen,
there's something I need to tell you.

1147
01:23:44,567 --> 01:23:46,488
About your brother's suit.

1148
01:23:47,236 --> 01:23:48,577
Hey.

1149
01:23:50,239 --> 01:23:52,209
What's up?

1150
01:23:52,241 --> 01:23:54,211
I just spoke to Bunny.

1151
01:23:54,243 --> 01:23:56,462
- He told me everything.
- What?

1152
01:24:00,416 --> 01:24:02,172
<i>You can't abandon me.</i>

1153
01:24:02,209 --> 01:24:04,095
<i>I just spoke to Bunny</i>

1154
01:24:04,169 --> 01:24:06,175
<i>I need you.</i>

1155
01:24:07,256 --> 01:24:10,684
<i>Hey buddy.
What am I gonna do without you?</i>

1156
01:24:37,119 --> 01:24:39,623
I can't believe
she flew off at you like that.

1157
01:24:41,248 --> 01:24:43,253
I fessed up and everything.

1158
01:24:44,189 --> 01:24:47,013
Guilt by association, I suppose.

1159
01:24:50,758 --> 01:24:52,845
I mean, there were a couple of things

1160
01:24:52,885 --> 01:24:57,227
I could have been clearer on,
in hindsight, but it was a very bad line.

1161
01:24:57,264 --> 01:24:59,732
You know, very crackly.

1162
01:24:59,767 --> 01:25:01,772
And I was very drunk.

1163
01:25:01,810 --> 01:25:03,816
Throw all that into the equation...

1164
01:25:04,563 --> 01:25:07,067
whole thing was a bit of a blur,
to be honest.

1165
01:25:07,775 --> 01:25:10,456
The important thing is,
we're back on the road.

1166
01:25:10,486 --> 01:25:12,491
Boys on the train.

1167
01:25:14,782 --> 01:25:16,787
Olive?

1168
01:25:17,785 --> 01:25:20,121
Come on.
Feel like I'm hogging them here.

1169
01:25:20,162 --> 01:25:21,883
No?

1170
01:25:23,791 --> 01:25:25,926
Come on. Chin up, dude.

1171
01:25:25,960 --> 01:25:27,716
You'll be over her in no time.

1172
01:25:27,753 --> 01:25:30,719
I mean, honestly, hand on heart,

1173
01:25:30,756 --> 01:25:33,176
can you even remember
what she looks like?

1174
01:25:34,093 --> 01:25:35,813
I know I can't.

1175
01:25:35,844 --> 01:25:39,143
And I was closer to her face
a hell of a lot more often than you were.

1176
01:25:39,181 --> 01:25:41,317
Not to put too fine a point on it, but...

1177
01:25:42,017 --> 01:25:43,607
We both know what I'm talking about.

1178
01:25:43,686 --> 01:25:46,782
There's no need to dwell on that
at this stage.

1179
01:25:46,814 --> 01:25:48,819
Yeah. Yeah.

1180
01:25:50,276 --> 01:25:52,993
Tell you what,
we can go anywhere you want.

1181
01:25:53,028 --> 01:25:54,784
Anywhere you want.

1182
01:25:54,822 --> 01:25:57,206
No. Listen to me, being insensitive.

1183
01:25:57,283 --> 01:25:58,754
I'll choose.

1184
01:25:58,784 --> 01:26:02,841
Let Bunny take charge for a change.

1185
01:26:02,871 --> 01:26:04,758
Here we go.

1186
01:26:04,790 --> 01:26:06,878
What is it you actually do, Bunny?

1187
01:26:06,917 --> 01:26:11,841
You talk about me not doing anything,
but what have you ever achieved?

1188
01:26:11,881 --> 01:26:14,135
You go to Spain to fight a bull
and what happens?

1189
01:26:14,174 --> 01:26:15,681
You get pissed,

1190
01:26:15,718 --> 01:26:19,348
fuck around in a car park, nick a suit,
and then head out to play cards.

1191
01:26:19,388 --> 01:26:21,523
- You want me to fight a bull?
- I don't...

1192
01:26:21,557 --> 01:26:23,776
- I'll fight a bull now.
- It's not about the bull.

1193
01:26:23,809 --> 01:26:27,606
I thought you said it was dangerous
and morally repugnant, but what the hell!

1194
01:26:27,646 --> 01:26:30,197
There's bulls out there now.
Fields chock-full of them.

1195
01:26:30,232 --> 01:26:31,525
Let's go, amigo.

1196
01:26:31,567 --> 01:26:32,927
I don't...

1197
01:26:41,410 --> 01:26:43,213
I don't want to do this any more.

1198
01:26:43,245 --> 01:26:45,250
You can't help it.

1199
01:26:45,748 --> 01:26:47,468
I want to go home.

1200
01:27:06,435 --> 01:27:08,238
Hey... Stop.

1201
01:27:08,270 --> 01:27:10,275
There's one. Got him.

1202
01:27:10,397 --> 01:27:12,568
This is fucking ridiculous. Let's go back.

1203
01:27:14,610 --> 01:27:16,781
I'm not going to save you, Bunny.

1204
01:27:16,820 --> 01:27:18,790
You won't have to.

1205
01:27:29,250 --> 01:27:31,255
Hey.

1206
01:27:32,294 --> 01:27:33,421
Toro!

1207
01:27:38,717 --> 01:27:40,687
Have I missed anything?

1208
01:27:40,803 --> 01:27:43,475
- No.
- Toro!

1209
01:28:10,749 --> 01:28:11,758
Again.

1210
01:29:49,139 --> 01:29:51,145
Not long to go now, buddy.

1211
01:30:00,734 --> 01:30:02,241
Come on.

1212
01:32:34,214 --> 01:32:40,262
Subtitles: Arigon

1213
01:33:09,298 --> 01:33:11,303
I'm sorry.

1214
01:33:11,342 --> 01:33:13,477
What for?

1215
01:33:13,510 --> 01:33:15,516
I should have stopped you.

1216
01:33:15,554 --> 01:33:17,559
You couldn't have.

1217
01:33:18,349 --> 01:33:21,196
Anyway, it was a pretty good way to go.

1218
01:33:21,227 --> 01:33:23,232
Gored by a bull.

1219
01:33:24,480 --> 01:33:27,327
I mean, I had always hoped
to be sucked out of an airlock

1220
01:33:27,358 --> 01:33:30,241
or gunned down by some demented fan.

1221
01:33:30,277 --> 01:33:32,282
But... I'll take a bull.

1222
01:33:33,656 --> 01:33:35,661
It was a great bet.

1223
01:33:40,746 --> 01:33:43,629
You wanna do something for me?
Go get laid!

1224
01:33:44,750 --> 01:33:47,799
Have you any idea of the mileage
you can get out of this?

1225
01:33:47,836 --> 01:33:50,007
"Hi, my name's Stephen."

1226
01:33:51,549 --> 01:33:57,231
"My best friend just died.
I don't know if I'll ever love again."

1227
01:33:59,890 --> 01:34:02,061
Balls in, balls in, balls in.

1228
01:34:02,101 --> 01:34:03,667
Fun time!

1229
01:34:08,315 --> 01:34:11,661
If you'd have been killed, I'd have
shagged a thousand women by now.

1230
01:34:11,694 --> 01:34:14,992
I don't want to shag a thousand women.
I don't wanna shag any women.

1231
01:34:15,030 --> 01:34:17,035
Apart from Eloisa.

1232
01:34:18,993 --> 01:34:21,543
I haven't spoken to her in a year.

1233
01:34:21,579 --> 01:34:24,462
Last time she saw me,
she kicked my arse, remember?

1234
01:34:24,498 --> 01:34:26,420
You can talk her round.

1235
01:34:26,458 --> 01:34:29,388
I wouldn't even know what to say.

1236
01:34:29,420 --> 01:34:32,682
Just tell her that I died

1237
01:34:32,715 --> 01:34:35,645
and you had a really tough time
dealing with it,

1238
01:34:35,676 --> 01:34:36,614
and...

1239
01:34:36,635 --> 01:34:40,017
you hope that somehow
she can find it in her heart to...

1240
01:34:40,055 --> 01:34:42,357
Boom! Boom-boom-boom.
Wokachika, wokachika.

1241
01:34:42,391 --> 01:34:43,945
Naughty, naughty, naughty.

1242
01:34:44,018 --> 01:34:46,817
Boom-boom-boom.
Wokachika, wokachika...

1243
01:34:50,065 --> 01:34:52,070
At least give her a call.

1244
01:35:52,711 --> 01:35:55,179
Have a good trip.

1245
01:35:55,214 --> 01:35:57,219
You not coming?

1246
01:35:57,383 --> 01:35:58,426
No.

1247
01:35:59,426 --> 01:36:01,681
I don't think that's the deal.

1248
01:36:03,472 --> 01:36:05,477
I'll miss you.

1249
01:36:05,516 --> 01:36:07,188
Listen...

1250
01:36:07,226 --> 01:36:09,776
Will you do one last thing for me?

1251
01:36:11,105 --> 01:36:12,493
Yeah, of course.

1252
01:36:15,442 --> 01:36:16,741
Bunny...

1253
01:36:16,777 --> 01:36:18,782
What? Anything.

1254
01:36:22,157 --> 01:36:25,788
There's a horse running
in the 5:05 at Epsom.

1255
01:36:25,828 --> 01:36:29,209
It's lost its last 3 races,
but they just lowered his handicap.

1256
01:36:29,248 --> 01:36:32,926
He's blinkered for the first time.
The jockey's face is a real nightmare.

1257
01:36:33,836 --> 01:36:36,386
- How much?
- Everything you've got. Seriously.

1258
01:36:36,422 --> 01:36:38,391
Put the house on it. It's a shoo-in.

1259
01:36:40,134 --> 01:36:43,396
Well, got to be at least worth a fiver.

1260
01:36:45,639 --> 01:36:46,766
OK.

1261
01:36:49,602 --> 01:36:52,615
Well... you ready?

1262
01:36:55,524 --> 01:36:57,363
Yeah.

1263
01:37:00,821 --> 01:37:02,826
<i>* LOVE:
Alone Again Or</i>

1264
01:37:17,296 --> 01:37:18,968
<i>* Yeah</i>

1265
01:37:19,006 --> 01:37:21,391
<i>* I said it's all right</i>

1266
01:37:21,759 --> 01:37:23,764
<i>* I won't forget</i>

1267
01:37:24,720 --> 01:37:30,853
<i>* All the times
I've waited patiently for you</i>

1268
01:37:31,685 --> 01:37:37,072
<i>* And you'll do
just what you choose to do</i>

1269
01:37:38,317 --> 01:37:43,537
<i>* And I will be alone again tonight,
my dear</i>

1270
01:38:02,883 --> 01:38:04,556
<i>* Yeah</i>

1271
01:38:04,593 --> 01:38:06,681
<i>* I heard a funny thing</i>

1272
01:38:07,263 --> 01:38:09,268
<i>* Somebody said to me</i>

1273
01:38:10,266 --> 01:38:16,316
<i>* You know that I could be in love
with almost everyone</i>

1274
01:38:17,064 --> 01:38:22,913
<i>* I think that people are the greatest fun</i>

1275
01:39:34,183 --> 01:39:35,440
<i>* Yeah</i>

1276
01:39:35,517 --> 01:39:37,439
<i>* I heard a funny thing</i>

1277
01:39:38,312 --> 01:39:40,317
<i>* Somebody said to me</i>

1278
01:39:41,190 --> 01:39:47,371
<i>* You know that I could be in love
with almost everyone</i>

1279
01:39:47,988 --> 01:39:53,920
<i>* I think that people are the greatest fun</i>