1
00:00:02,220 --> 00:00:03,842
We're gonna have orchids
in all the pews, right?
2
00:00:03,912 --> 00:00:05,765
Because orchids are Donna's
favorite flowers,
3
00:00:05,885 --> 00:00:07,211
and she's my favorite flower.
4
00:00:07,253 --> 00:00:08,779
Ha ha!
We real cute.
5
00:00:08,821 --> 00:00:10,051
Of course there
are gonna be orchids.
6
00:00:10,085 --> 00:00:11,787
Do you think this is my first
time working a side job
7
00:00:11,821 --> 00:00:14,555
as a wedding planner
for a former co-worker?
8
00:00:14,589 --> 00:00:16,787
- No?
- I'm so sorry.
9
00:00:16,829 --> 00:00:18,291
I mostly have my rage problem
under control,
10
00:00:18,325 --> 00:00:20,195
but planning is very stressful.
11
00:00:20,229 --> 00:00:21,699
Please avoid my trigger words,
12
00:00:21,733 --> 00:00:24,235
"flowers," "schedule," "vows,"
13
00:00:24,269 --> 00:00:26,603
"bride," "groom," "food,"
14
00:00:26,637 --> 00:00:29,171
"love," "happy," "church,"
15
00:00:29,205 --> 00:00:31,009
"event," "wedding," and "Craig."
16
00:00:31,129 --> 00:00:32,050
I am so sorry, Craig.
17
00:00:32,077 --> 00:00:33,939
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
18
00:00:33,973 --> 00:00:35,843
April, walk with me.
19
00:00:35,877 --> 00:00:38,243
So I chose you
as my Maid of Honor because
20
00:00:38,285 --> 00:00:39,979
you've become one
of my best friends,
21
00:00:40,013 --> 00:00:41,483
- And I love you like a sister.
- Ew.
22
00:00:41,517 --> 00:00:43,555
But also because you're tough.
23
00:00:43,589 --> 00:00:44,923
My family arrives tonight.
24
00:00:44,957 --> 00:00:46,419
I know.
And they're all set
25
00:00:46,453 --> 00:00:49,027
with their welcome bags, and I
told your brother LeVondrious
26
00:00:49,061 --> 00:00:50,627
that he is not welcome.
27
00:00:50,661 --> 00:00:54,131
Good, but still, there's gonna
be 28 Meagles in one room,
28
00:00:54,165 --> 00:00:55,867
which means
there's gonna be drama.
29
00:00:55,901 --> 00:00:57,363
I will handle everything.
30
00:00:57,397 --> 00:00:59,171
I actually care whether
you're having a good time
31
00:00:59,205 --> 00:01:00,267
and are happy.
32
00:01:00,301 --> 00:01:01,371
It's weird.
33
00:01:01,405 --> 00:01:03,075
The Meagles
are a cold-blooded crew
34
00:01:03,109 --> 00:01:05,043
of judgmental grudge-holders.
35
00:01:05,077 --> 00:01:06,907
My cousin Winnie once forgot
to use a coaster
36
00:01:06,941 --> 00:01:09,715
at my grandpa's house, and
he wrote her out of his will.
37
00:01:09,749 --> 00:01:12,347
The last four Meagle family
Pictionary tournaments
38
00:01:12,381 --> 00:01:13,819
ended at the hospital.
39
00:01:13,853 --> 00:01:15,747
Legally, no more than
three Meagles are allowed
40
00:01:15,789 --> 00:01:18,323
on an international flight
together.
41
00:01:18,357 --> 00:01:19,819
But they give great gifts.
42
00:01:19,853 --> 00:01:21,291
Gotta get that flatware.
43
00:01:21,325 --> 00:01:24,427
[triumphant music]
44
00:01:24,461 --> 00:01:32,858
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
45
00:01:42,358 --> 00:01:44,159
Tommy, I was at the nail salon
and I picked up
46
00:01:44,162 --> 00:01:45,225
some geranium hand cream.
47
00:01:45,345 --> 00:01:45,953
Do you wanna try it?
48
00:01:46,073 --> 00:01:48,431
Uh, yes.
Warm it up, please.
49
00:01:48,818 --> 00:01:50,388
Oh, that smells nice.
50
00:01:50,422 --> 00:01:51,398
I'm just gonna go
and make sure everything
51
00:01:51,432 --> 00:01:52,704
is set for tonight, okay?
52
00:01:52,738 --> 00:01:54,704
- All right, see you later.
- See you, Ron.
53
00:01:55,137 --> 00:01:58,463
I've always liked that Lucy.
Glad things are going well.
54
00:01:58,497 --> 00:01:59,344
Better than well.
55
00:01:59,464 --> 00:02:00,554
And guess what I have planned
for tonight?
56
00:02:00,674 --> 00:02:03,095
- No.
- As Donna's Butler of Honor,
57
00:02:03,129 --> 00:02:03,929
I'm going all out.
58
00:02:04,180 --> 00:02:05,385
Baby blue brocade.
59
00:02:05,419 --> 00:02:08,030
As a surprise,
I got a matching dress for Lucy.
60
00:02:08,064 --> 00:02:12,453
And do you believe Lucy will
be happy with this gift?
61
00:02:12,495 --> 00:02:14,865
100%!
We're so in sync.
62
00:02:14,907 --> 00:02:16,343
I finally feel like
I'm with the person
63
00:02:16,377 --> 00:02:17,884
I'm gonna be with forever.
I'd marry her tomorrow.
64
00:02:18,004 --> 00:02:20,320
Bully for you, son.
More importantly,
65
00:02:20,353 --> 00:02:22,297
do you have tri-tip for tonight?
66
00:02:22,331 --> 00:02:23,933
Because if not I brought my own.
67
00:02:26,947 --> 00:02:28,057
I love weddings.
68
00:02:28,177 --> 00:02:30,901
Good food, the celebration
of romantic love,
69
00:02:30,949 --> 00:02:32,618
and most of all, churches.
70
00:02:32,652 --> 00:02:34,950
Say what you will about
organized religion,
71
00:02:34,992 --> 00:02:37,744
those bastards knew how to
construct an edifice.
72
00:02:37,994 --> 00:02:39,515
[kids screaming]
73
00:02:39,632 --> 00:02:40,545
Okay, monsters.
[claps]
74
00:02:40,580 --> 00:02:42,612
Mommy and Daddy have to pack
75
00:02:42,646 --> 00:02:44,813
because we are going to a hotel.
76
00:02:44,847 --> 00:02:46,370
But Roz is gonna stay here
with you.
77
00:02:46,404 --> 00:02:47,970
Yeah, and we are going
to have so much fun.
78
00:02:48,004 --> 00:02:50,202
We're gonna play games,
we're gonna color,
79
00:02:50,244 --> 00:02:53,347
maybe we're gonna even sit
quietly for 30 seconds.
80
00:02:53,381 --> 00:02:56,380
Do you think
I could have 30 seconds?
81
00:02:56,414 --> 00:02:58,852
- That's all.
- She's fading.
82
00:02:58,886 --> 00:03:01,485
Roz, Roz, hey, hey,
83
00:03:01,519 --> 00:03:02,853
you are a wonderful nanny.
84
00:03:02,887 --> 00:03:04,653
- Oh.
- You're tough, and strong,
85
00:03:04,695 --> 00:03:06,325
and you're an excellent
caretaker for our children.
86
00:03:06,359 --> 00:03:07,693
Yeah, every time you
come to our house
87
00:03:07,727 --> 00:03:09,460
we are so happy to see you.
88
00:03:09,494 --> 00:03:11,963
I love you more than Ben.
89
00:03:11,997 --> 00:03:13,426
I do.
90
00:03:13,468 --> 00:03:15,562
If Ben left me, I would be sad,
but I would get through it.
91
00:03:15,596 --> 00:03:18,236
But if you left me,
I would never recover.
92
00:03:18,270 --> 00:03:22,005
Thanks.
That helps.
93
00:03:22,039 --> 00:03:23,741
I'm so used to packing for them
94
00:03:23,775 --> 00:03:26,075
I almost put in diapers
for myself.
95
00:03:26,109 --> 00:03:27,309
[on television] Incoming call.
96
00:03:27,349 --> 00:03:28,578
Jen Barkley.
97
00:03:28,612 --> 00:03:30,946
Jen Barkley is calling again.
She is relentless.
98
00:03:30,980 --> 00:03:33,382
Jen is a powerful
political operative.
99
00:03:33,416 --> 00:03:35,045
Don't you even want
to know what she has to say?
100
00:03:35,079 --> 00:03:37,116
She'll just say what she
always says, which is,
101
00:03:37,151 --> 00:03:39,413
"Leslie, would you consider
running for state senate
102
00:03:39,455 --> 00:03:40,854
or Congress?"
And I'll say,
103
00:03:40,888 --> 00:03:42,319
"Jen, thank you very much,
that's very flattering,
104
00:03:42,361 --> 00:03:46,727
but I love my job, and I get to
do it for the entire country."
105
00:03:46,761 --> 00:03:48,358
The whole world is my park.
106
00:03:48,400 --> 00:03:51,598
Besides, our lives are so
chaotic we can't run a campaign.
107
00:03:51,632 --> 00:03:54,471
Well, if you really wanted
to do it, we'd find a way.
108
00:03:54,505 --> 00:03:56,967
I mean,
things aren't that chaotic.
109
00:03:57,009 --> 00:03:58,504
All three of them just bumped
into each other
110
00:03:58,538 --> 00:04:00,176
and broke everything you own.
111
00:04:00,210 --> 00:04:01,479
[shattering]
112
00:04:01,513 --> 00:04:03,277
I--I don't know what that was.
113
00:04:05,711 --> 00:04:07,612
Oh, would you look at that?
114
00:04:07,646 --> 00:04:10,284
Sweetie, I think your best
friend Tom's
115
00:04:10,318 --> 00:04:12,620
giving his ladyfriend a gift.
116
00:04:12,654 --> 00:04:15,117
You know Gayle gives me a gift
each and every day.
117
00:04:15,159 --> 00:04:18,089
Oh, I got
the greatest gift of all.
118
00:04:18,123 --> 00:04:19,753
Being married to you.
119
00:04:19,787 --> 00:04:21,592
Oh, sweetie.
120
00:04:21,626 --> 00:04:24,223
Control yourselves, Gergiches!
121
00:04:24,257 --> 00:04:26,424
Damn, Tommy, well done!
122
00:04:26,458 --> 00:04:27,793
I knew you'd like it.
123
00:04:27,835 --> 00:04:30,300
Get changed, baby, we gotta
dominate this party.
124
00:04:30,334 --> 00:04:32,634
What do you think, Ron?
Tommy's the man.
125
00:04:32,668 --> 00:04:35,570
I normally don't get involved
in people's personal affairs,
126
00:04:35,604 --> 00:04:39,177
but something about a wedding...
I'll just say it.
127
00:04:39,211 --> 00:04:41,776
Tom is quite taken with you.
128
00:04:41,810 --> 00:04:43,511
[laughs]
He's taken with me, huh?
129
00:04:43,545 --> 00:04:44,478
Yes.
130
00:04:44,512 --> 00:04:46,174
He said he'd marry you tomorrow.
131
00:04:49,014 --> 00:04:50,644
Seems silly to stay at a hotel
132
00:04:50,686 --> 00:04:52,619
that's ten minutes
from our house.
133
00:04:52,653 --> 00:04:53,714
Well, it's been three years.
134
00:04:53,748 --> 00:04:55,513
We deserve one night away
together.
135
00:04:55,555 --> 00:04:56,952
A little downtime,
little privacy,
136
00:04:56,986 --> 00:04:58,846
maybe we make some more kids.
137
00:04:58,888 --> 00:04:59,886
Don't even joke about that.
138
00:04:59,920 --> 00:05:01,053
Let's just make, like,
three more,
139
00:05:01,087 --> 00:05:02,587
so that each one of them
can have a friend.
140
00:05:02,621 --> 00:05:05,283
Ugh.
141
00:05:05,325 --> 00:05:06,755
Jen?
What are you doing here?
142
00:05:06,789 --> 00:05:08,150
You idiots won't answer
my calls,
143
00:05:08,157 --> 00:05:09,755
and what I have to tell you
cannot wait.
144
00:05:09,789 --> 00:05:10,891
But--
[kids screaming]
145
00:05:10,925 --> 00:05:12,330
What's that horrible sound?
146
00:05:12,364 --> 00:05:13,529
Children.
147
00:05:13,563 --> 00:05:16,233
Ugh, your life is gross.
148
00:05:16,267 --> 00:05:17,664
My life is amazing.
149
00:05:17,698 --> 00:05:19,032
Jen, thank you
so much for coming,
150
00:05:19,066 --> 00:05:20,431
but we have to go.
151
00:05:20,465 --> 00:05:23,470
I have never been late for
an event that requires an RSVP.
152
00:05:23,504 --> 00:05:25,134
You guys live
in Pawnee, Indiana.
153
00:05:25,168 --> 00:05:26,204
Where do you have to go?
154
00:05:26,238 --> 00:05:28,897
Putting up a new scarecrow?
[laughs]
155
00:05:28,939 --> 00:05:30,798
Could you please
just get to the point?
156
00:05:30,832 --> 00:05:32,165
Sure...
Paul Hartwell,
157
00:05:32,197 --> 00:05:33,962
who's your congressional
incumbent from this district,
158
00:05:34,004 --> 00:05:36,167
is a moron,
even by Washington standards.
159
00:05:36,200 --> 00:05:38,963
But he wins every year,
because he's a horrible bully
160
00:05:38,997 --> 00:05:41,095
and nobody opposes him.
Till now.
161
00:05:41,130 --> 00:05:44,025
Indiana's 10th district
needs a new leader.
162
00:05:44,059 --> 00:05:47,223
Someone who's made it a home,
who cares about our citizens,
163
00:05:47,265 --> 00:05:49,062
and who understands
the local economy.
164
00:05:49,096 --> 00:05:51,692
Jen, I told you, I have
a dream job, I don't want to--
165
00:05:51,734 --> 00:05:54,363
A candidate named Ben Wyatt.
166
00:05:54,397 --> 00:05:55,468
Sorry?
167
00:05:55,502 --> 00:05:57,204
I'm dead serious, Ben.
168
00:05:57,238 --> 00:06:00,635
I think you should run for
the House of Representatives.
169
00:06:00,669 --> 00:06:01,802
Whoa!
What was that?
170
00:06:01,836 --> 00:06:03,202
That was huge!
171
00:06:03,244 --> 00:06:05,305
Hang on, this is Congress
you're talking about,
172
00:06:05,339 --> 00:06:08,408
like, where bills become laws.
173
00:06:08,442 --> 00:06:10,080
I am not qualified for that.
174
00:06:10,114 --> 00:06:11,975
We're talking about the
House of Representatives, Ben.
175
00:06:12,009 --> 00:06:13,246
You might be overqualified.
176
00:06:13,280 --> 00:06:15,412
Hartwell's biggest weakness
is the economy,
177
00:06:15,446 --> 00:06:16,610
which is your exact strength.
178
00:06:16,644 --> 00:06:18,313
You're young, you're smart,
179
00:06:18,347 --> 00:06:19,913
you're running the biggest city
in the district.
180
00:06:19,947 --> 00:06:22,744
I saw you handle
that WiFi thing on TV.
181
00:06:22,786 --> 00:06:25,180
My firm is ready to go as soon
as you say the word.
182
00:06:25,214 --> 00:06:26,947
You in or you out?
183
00:06:26,981 --> 00:06:29,742
Uh, Two of the three kids
are showering in their pajamas,
184
00:06:29,784 --> 00:06:32,349
and most of Ben's ties
are in the toilet.
185
00:06:32,383 --> 00:06:35,116
Just like, as an update
of where things are at.
186
00:06:35,149 --> 00:06:36,547
I mean, this is chaos.
187
00:06:38,874 --> 00:06:40,569
Guys, it happened
a really long time ago, right?
188
00:06:40,611 --> 00:06:42,105
And it was probably an accident.
189
00:06:42,139 --> 00:06:45,041
Oh, yeah, I'm sure the Dig Dug
machine just unplugged itself
190
00:06:45,075 --> 00:06:47,850
right before I was about to beat
his high score.
191
00:06:47,884 --> 00:06:49,616
Yeah, I'm sure
it was an accident.
192
00:06:49,650 --> 00:06:50,744
Hey, status report?
193
00:06:50,786 --> 00:06:53,183
The Meagles are weird.
The words that they say
194
00:06:53,217 --> 00:06:56,223
sound passive,
but seem aggressive.
195
00:06:56,257 --> 00:06:57,422
I feel like there should be
a term for that.
196
00:06:57,457 --> 00:06:59,886
Like, "nicey-meanie."
197
00:06:59,928 --> 00:07:03,221
Yeah, I just had to physically
separate two 80-year-old men
198
00:07:03,263 --> 00:07:05,595
who were arguing about whether
it was really Lena Horne
199
00:07:05,629 --> 00:07:07,763
in that grocery store in 1970.
200
00:07:07,797 --> 00:07:10,626
Okay, you stay on the Key Largo
and Denver Meagles,
201
00:07:10,668 --> 00:07:12,730
and I will handle
the Berlin Meagles.
202
00:07:12,764 --> 00:07:15,000
Done!
203
00:07:15,034 --> 00:07:16,967
So you thinking
about Jen's offer?
204
00:07:17,001 --> 00:07:18,998
Yes. I mean,
how would this even work?
205
00:07:19,032 --> 00:07:23,069
Our lives are so busy, and if
I won, I would be a congressman.
206
00:07:23,103 --> 00:07:24,740
Or woman.
I mean, equal rights.
207
00:07:24,775 --> 00:07:26,404
No, that doesn't apply.
208
00:07:26,438 --> 00:07:27,876
Okay.
Try this.
209
00:07:27,910 --> 00:07:31,707
Tonight, just act like
you've decided to run.
210
00:07:31,749 --> 00:07:32,778
And then tomorrow
at the wedding,
211
00:07:32,812 --> 00:07:34,440
act like you've decided
not to run.
212
00:07:34,482 --> 00:07:35,911
See which one feels better.
213
00:07:35,945 --> 00:07:39,446
Okay.
What do you think I should do?
214
00:07:39,480 --> 00:07:41,078
Ben has to run.
215
00:07:41,119 --> 00:07:42,845
I don't want to push it,
because it might backfire,
216
00:07:42,887 --> 00:07:44,116
but he has to run.
217
00:07:44,150 --> 00:07:46,451
He would be good for America,
good for the world.
218
00:07:46,485 --> 00:07:50,016
Ben should be the Royal Archduke
Sultan Emperor
219
00:07:50,050 --> 00:07:53,183
of All Inhabitable Lands
on Earth!
220
00:07:53,225 --> 00:07:54,887
I'm completely neutral.
221
00:07:54,921 --> 00:07:57,655
I will support you
no matter what you do.
222
00:07:59,561 --> 00:08:01,591
You told Lucy
I want to marry her?
223
00:08:01,632 --> 00:08:03,294
Damn it, son,
the small hamburgers.
224
00:08:03,328 --> 00:08:05,334
Ron! You have to walk back
what you said.
225
00:08:05,368 --> 00:08:07,105
Walk back sounds like lying.
226
00:08:07,139 --> 00:08:09,137
Can you drop your strict life
codes for a second
227
00:08:09,171 --> 00:08:10,337
and help me out?
228
00:08:10,371 --> 00:08:11,904
Even though I've known Lucy
for years,
229
00:08:11,945 --> 00:08:13,437
and can see myself spending
a life together with her,
230
00:08:13,471 --> 00:08:16,772
having children, walking
the grounds of Tommy's Bahama--
231
00:08:16,806 --> 00:08:19,042
a private island
I'll eventually buy--
232
00:08:19,076 --> 00:08:21,145
that's way in the future, man.
233
00:08:21,179 --> 00:08:22,680
Don't call me "man."
234
00:08:22,714 --> 00:08:24,878
That's what you took away
from this?
235
00:08:24,913 --> 00:08:26,142
[grunts]
236
00:08:26,184 --> 00:08:27,877
Don't serve this man.
237
00:08:27,911 --> 00:08:30,484
No more food until he fixes his
giant disaster he's created.
238
00:08:30,518 --> 00:08:31,748
[groans]
239
00:08:31,782 --> 00:08:34,082
Okay, starting now,
you're in campaign mode.
240
00:08:34,116 --> 00:08:35,553
So first up, meet and greet.
241
00:08:35,587 --> 00:08:36,848
You remember
how this goes, right?
242
00:08:36,882 --> 00:08:38,687
Your goal is to act like
everyone is interesting
243
00:08:38,721 --> 00:08:42,986
- and important.
- Hey, guys.
244
00:08:43,020 --> 00:08:44,081
Nope, too hard.
245
00:08:44,115 --> 00:08:47,085
- Let's try someone else.
- Okay.
246
00:08:47,119 --> 00:08:48,483
Oh, there's Donna's parents.
247
00:08:48,517 --> 00:08:49,481
- Okay?
- Okay.
248
00:08:49,515 --> 00:08:50,816
- Work your magic.
- You got it.
249
00:08:50,850 --> 00:08:53,446
Uh, hi, Mr. and Mrs. Meagle,
I presume?
250
00:08:53,480 --> 00:08:56,287
I am Mr. Meagle,
but we're divorced.
251
00:08:56,320 --> 00:08:57,718
I'm Grace Callahan.
252
00:08:57,752 --> 00:08:59,422
Well, I'm sorry, Ms. Callahan.
253
00:08:59,456 --> 00:09:03,390
It's Doctor Callahan.
254
00:09:03,424 --> 00:09:06,260
Well, I hope that you are
a podiatrist or a dentist,
255
00:09:06,294 --> 00:09:09,498
because I seem to have a case
of foot-in-mouth disorder.
256
00:09:09,532 --> 00:09:12,432
[laughter]
257
00:09:12,467 --> 00:09:14,359
Hey, guys.
How's everything going?
258
00:09:14,401 --> 00:09:17,061
April, we couldn't be happier,
and you are an angel for asking.
259
00:09:17,095 --> 00:09:19,101
Yeah, it's surprisingly
painless.
260
00:09:19,135 --> 00:09:22,771
No swiping,
no passive-aggressive comments.
261
00:09:22,805 --> 00:09:24,538
No drama at all.
262
00:09:24,572 --> 00:09:26,473
Here are all
the troublemakers, boss.
263
00:09:26,507 --> 00:09:28,967
Thank you. Meagles!
I am not screwing around.
264
00:09:29,009 --> 00:09:30,303
Okay?
265
00:09:30,337 --> 00:09:32,101
Lauren,
no more discussion of Majorca.
266
00:09:32,143 --> 00:09:33,708
Majorca is off limits.
267
00:09:33,742 --> 00:09:35,771
Brian and Gloria,
stop making Horatio feel bad
268
00:09:35,805 --> 00:09:38,006
that your daughter went to Yale.
No one gives a [bleep].
269
00:09:38,012 --> 00:09:39,841
- And, Ginuwine?
- Yes?
270
00:09:39,874 --> 00:09:42,010
- Get it together.
- I'm sorry, April.
271
00:09:42,044 --> 00:09:43,177
Kathy started this.
272
00:09:43,211 --> 00:09:44,377
[mocking]
Kathy started--
273
00:09:44,411 --> 00:09:45,744
I don't care!
274
00:09:45,778 --> 00:09:46,711
She doesn't mean it.
275
00:09:46,745 --> 00:09:47,950
Don't cry, Ginuwine.
276
00:09:47,984 --> 00:09:49,814
It's okay.
277
00:09:49,848 --> 00:09:51,750
Thanks, Andy.
278
00:09:51,784 --> 00:09:53,621
Easy peasy.
279
00:09:53,655 --> 00:09:56,819
Lemon sneezy.
280
00:09:56,852 --> 00:10:00,118
Lucy,
I have something to tell you.
281
00:10:00,152 --> 00:10:02,685
I am a liar.
282
00:10:02,719 --> 00:10:03,986
What?
283
00:10:04,020 --> 00:10:05,282
Well, no, I am not a liar.
284
00:10:05,323 --> 00:10:07,689
I have never lied
about anything in my life.
285
00:10:07,723 --> 00:10:11,690
Though I suppose you could
construe camouflage as a lie.
286
00:10:11,723 --> 00:10:13,361
What is happening right now?
287
00:10:13,395 --> 00:10:17,095
Tom wanted to convey
that he likes you a great deal.
288
00:10:17,129 --> 00:10:20,164
So he said that he could imagine
marrying you.
289
00:10:20,198 --> 00:10:21,961
And living on an island
with your kids.
290
00:10:21,995 --> 00:10:25,864
Wait, now we're on an island?
With kids?
291
00:10:25,898 --> 00:10:27,367
- Plural?
- Yes.
292
00:10:27,402 --> 00:10:31,069
Now, do you know where I can
find those little ham balls?
293
00:10:31,103 --> 00:10:33,238
Watch out for those riding
lawnmowers, man.
294
00:10:33,272 --> 00:10:35,174
[laughter]
295
00:10:35,208 --> 00:10:36,374
Babe, you are killing it!
296
00:10:36,408 --> 00:10:38,004
I am, right?
297
00:10:38,038 --> 00:10:39,372
- Yes!
- See, just thinking
298
00:10:39,406 --> 00:10:41,811
I'm a congressman
makes me feel like one.
299
00:10:41,844 --> 00:10:42,778
Yeah.
300
00:10:42,812 --> 00:10:44,305
Oh, also,
I have a little secret.
301
00:10:44,347 --> 00:10:45,712
I'm drunk.
302
00:10:45,746 --> 00:10:47,144
I am too.
303
00:10:47,178 --> 00:10:48,480
Ever since we had our kids,
it only takes,
304
00:10:48,514 --> 00:10:49,680
like, one sip of wine.
305
00:10:49,714 --> 00:10:51,646
I feel so good
and "condifent."
306
00:10:51,680 --> 00:10:53,914
- Mm-hmm.
- Con...
307
00:10:53,948 --> 00:10:55,809
I feel "condifent."
308
00:10:55,850 --> 00:10:56,971
You know what you should do?
309
00:10:56,977 --> 00:10:58,343
You should give a toast.
310
00:10:58,385 --> 00:10:59,815
Because if you were running
for Congress,
311
00:10:59,848 --> 00:11:01,382
you have to give speeches,
right?
312
00:11:01,416 --> 00:11:03,181
You want me to make a toast?
I'll toast it up.
313
00:11:03,215 --> 00:11:04,749
Toast it, baby.
Roast it and toast it
314
00:11:04,783 --> 00:11:07,020
till it's brown on both sides.
315
00:11:07,054 --> 00:11:08,820
Hey, everybody.
I'm Ben Wyatt.
316
00:11:08,853 --> 00:11:12,258
Listen, we, of course, are
here to celebrate Donna and Joe,
317
00:11:12,292 --> 00:11:15,425
and I have to say, you know,
getting married is
318
00:11:15,459 --> 00:11:18,729
the bravest,
most wonderful thing you can do.
319
00:11:18,763 --> 00:11:21,329
Because every day you come home
and you're just, like,
320
00:11:21,363 --> 00:11:23,265
"What?
321
00:11:23,299 --> 00:11:25,400
"It's you! I love you!
322
00:11:25,434 --> 00:11:28,134
You're my sexy roommate.
We love each other."
323
00:11:28,168 --> 00:11:30,268
Whoo!
He's talking about me.
324
00:11:30,302 --> 00:11:31,867
Yes, I am, babydoll!
325
00:11:31,901 --> 00:11:35,403
Look, Donna and Joe are great.
326
00:11:35,437 --> 00:11:38,473
You all are great.
327
00:11:38,507 --> 00:11:41,376
And this wedding
is gonna be amazing.
328
00:11:41,410 --> 00:11:44,743
Let's get some music
and dancing going.
329
00:11:44,777 --> 00:11:49,318
And I am Ben Wyatt, and I very
much approve this message!
330
00:11:49,352 --> 00:11:50,414
[cheering]
331
00:11:50,448 --> 00:11:53,383
[Rob Base & DJ EZ Rock's
It Takes Two]
332
00:11:53,425 --> 00:11:55,287
♪ ♪
333
00:11:55,321 --> 00:11:57,054
You want me to shut that down?
334
00:11:57,088 --> 00:11:58,525
No, I like it.
335
00:11:58,559 --> 00:11:59,860
Let the little man dance.
336
00:11:59,894 --> 00:12:01,124
Hey!
337
00:12:01,158 --> 00:12:05,059
♪ It takes two to make
a thing go right ♪
338
00:12:06,531 --> 00:12:08,695
Ah, my head.
339
00:12:08,729 --> 00:12:10,263
Last night was so fun.
340
00:12:10,297 --> 00:12:13,167
- But my head died.
- Yeah.
341
00:12:13,201 --> 00:12:15,166
Yeah, mine's filled
with concrete.
342
00:12:15,200 --> 00:12:16,997
Okay so--
[tablet beeps]
343
00:12:17,039 --> 00:12:18,469
Yesterday, you pretended
you were gonna run.
344
00:12:18,503 --> 00:12:20,972
Today, you're gonna pretend like
you're not gonna run.
345
00:12:21,006 --> 00:12:22,108
Oh, no.
346
00:12:22,142 --> 00:12:23,475
Jen posted the campaign ad.
347
00:12:23,509 --> 00:12:24,642
It's everywhere.
348
00:12:24,676 --> 00:12:25,705
I'm running.
349
00:12:25,739 --> 00:12:28,807
How could she do this to--
350
00:12:28,841 --> 00:12:30,270
Oh, God, I'm remembering things.
351
00:12:30,312 --> 00:12:31,543
[sighs]
352
00:12:31,577 --> 00:12:33,511
We called Jen last night,
didn't we?
353
00:12:33,545 --> 00:12:34,783
[phone beeps]
354
00:12:34,816 --> 00:12:36,278
- Yeah, we did.
- Ugh.
355
00:12:36,312 --> 00:12:39,284
I also called 867-5309
100 times.
356
00:12:39,318 --> 00:12:40,980
Oh, God.
357
00:12:41,014 --> 00:12:43,302
Bad.
What do we do?
358
00:12:45,380 --> 00:12:46,514
There you are.
Surprise, surprise.
359
00:12:46,548 --> 00:12:47,746
Whoa!
360
00:12:47,788 --> 00:12:49,154
Oh, you guys should've
corner-boothed it.
361
00:12:49,188 --> 00:12:51,197
- 'Cause you look awful.
- Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.
362
00:12:51,317 --> 00:12:52,482
You're gonna scare off
the other customers.
363
00:12:52,516 --> 00:12:53,753
- Shh.
- Hey, Jen.
364
00:12:53,787 --> 00:12:56,414
All those kids keep you up
all night?
365
00:12:56,456 --> 00:12:57,820
I'm so happy with my choices.
366
00:12:57,854 --> 00:12:59,786
- Okay, Jen?
- Yeah?
367
00:12:59,820 --> 00:13:02,319
Um, I know I left you
a message last night,
368
00:13:02,353 --> 00:13:05,316
but I really do think you should
have checked with me
369
00:13:05,350 --> 00:13:06,618
before throwing me into this.
370
00:13:06,652 --> 00:13:08,185
No, Ben, I'm sorry,
you left me four messages
371
00:13:08,219 --> 00:13:09,249
- last night.
- What?
372
00:13:09,283 --> 00:13:10,689
And they contained very specific
373
00:13:10,723 --> 00:13:12,257
policy positions.
374
00:13:12,291 --> 00:13:14,553
I want to come out strong
on education.
375
00:13:14,595 --> 00:13:16,657
Then I'll tack hard
into fiscal responsibility.
376
00:13:16,691 --> 00:13:19,864
- Oh, my God.
- ♪ 8-6-7-5-3-0-9 ♪
377
00:13:19,898 --> 00:13:21,264
I love that song.
378
00:13:21,298 --> 00:13:22,664
♪ Jenny, I've got your number ♪
379
00:13:22,698 --> 00:13:24,633
Hey, babe, it's ringing!
380
00:13:24,667 --> 00:13:28,600
Wow, honey, you were
a lot more lucid than I was.
381
00:13:28,634 --> 00:13:31,501
Wait, were you guys drunk?
382
00:13:31,535 --> 00:13:33,604
That is hilarious.
383
00:13:33,638 --> 00:13:35,003
- No, we weren't--
- Oh, you guys are gonna fit in
384
00:13:35,037 --> 00:13:36,074
so great in Washington.
385
00:13:36,108 --> 00:13:39,136
Most of Congress is drunk,
all of the time.
386
00:13:39,171 --> 00:13:41,546
Okay, official presser
is tomorrow at 9:00.
387
00:13:41,580 --> 00:13:42,544
You could bail if you want.
388
00:13:42,579 --> 00:13:43,775
But it would be embarrassing.
389
00:13:43,809 --> 00:13:44,806
It might derail your career.
390
00:13:44,848 --> 00:13:45,972
Might not.
Probably will.
391
00:13:46,014 --> 00:13:47,611
But you never do know though,
right?
392
00:13:47,645 --> 00:13:49,945
So just let me know
what you want to do, okay?
393
00:13:49,979 --> 00:13:51,241
- Will.
- I'm just gonna go
394
00:13:51,283 --> 00:13:53,480
spend my time doing exactly
what I want to do,
395
00:13:53,514 --> 00:13:55,647
because I don't have children.
396
00:13:55,681 --> 00:13:59,550
Bye, guys.
397
00:13:59,584 --> 00:14:01,055
[church organ playing]
Ron?
398
00:14:01,089 --> 00:14:03,852
I'm Walden, with the Church's
historical archives.
399
00:14:03,886 --> 00:14:06,522
You called about wanting
information on the building?
400
00:14:06,556 --> 00:14:07,649
I did, indeed.
401
00:14:07,691 --> 00:14:09,319
- Let's start with the facade.
- Mm.
402
00:14:09,353 --> 00:14:12,085
Was the limestone
locally hand-hewn?
403
00:14:12,119 --> 00:14:14,321
No.
In the late 1870s,
404
00:14:14,355 --> 00:14:17,750
it was actually cheaper to
import limestone from Michigan.
405
00:14:17,784 --> 00:14:18,718
- Fascinating.
- Do you want to sit here?
406
00:14:18,752 --> 00:14:19,791
- Or should I...?
- But tell me--
407
00:14:19,825 --> 00:14:20,792
I'll do whatever you want.
408
00:14:20,826 --> 00:14:22,361
I'm fine with whatever.
409
00:14:22,395 --> 00:14:24,129
No.
Whatever you want.
410
00:14:24,163 --> 00:14:25,929
No pressure.
411
00:14:25,963 --> 00:14:28,128
Excuse me.
412
00:14:28,170 --> 00:14:29,768
[gasps] Oh, my God.
413
00:14:29,802 --> 00:14:32,071
Oh, look at how beautiful
you look.
414
00:14:32,105 --> 00:14:33,670
Leslie, I'm not even
in my dress yet.
415
00:14:33,704 --> 00:14:35,500
But you're gonna be very soon.
416
00:14:35,534 --> 00:14:37,499
All right, I want to say
something to my girls.
417
00:14:37,541 --> 00:14:40,705
Knope, you're a softie,
but on the inside,
418
00:14:40,739 --> 00:14:42,766
you're a straight-up boss.
419
00:14:42,808 --> 00:14:45,433
April, you're the exact
opposite.
420
00:14:45,467 --> 00:14:48,535
Y'all inspire me and I love you.
421
00:14:48,569 --> 00:14:50,468
And you, too, Michelle.
422
00:14:50,502 --> 00:14:51,602
Michelle...
423
00:14:51,636 --> 00:14:53,801
You were my best friend
from childhood.
424
00:14:53,835 --> 00:14:56,165
Until we lost touch 'cause you
thought your college boyfriend
425
00:14:56,199 --> 00:14:57,267
was into me.
426
00:14:57,302 --> 00:14:58,563
He was.
427
00:14:58,605 --> 00:15:00,499
I never gave him the time
of day.
428
00:15:00,533 --> 00:15:03,772
But now, we're rebuilding
our friendship.
429
00:15:03,806 --> 00:15:05,403
Is this wedding going to be
a test for you?
430
00:15:05,445 --> 00:15:06,371
Yes.
431
00:15:06,413 --> 00:15:07,779
But the doctors once told you
432
00:15:07,813 --> 00:15:08,979
you were never going
to walk again.
433
00:15:09,013 --> 00:15:10,978
So this should be easy, right?
434
00:15:11,012 --> 00:15:13,975
Wow, what a complicated
tapestry that is.
435
00:15:14,017 --> 00:15:18,246
Bring it in. Bring it in.
Bring it in.
436
00:15:18,280 --> 00:15:19,446
Moment over.
437
00:15:19,488 --> 00:15:21,012
Leslie, April, help Donna
with her dress.
438
00:15:21,054 --> 00:15:22,715
Hi, I'm Typhoon.
439
00:15:22,749 --> 00:15:25,184
Typhoon, I am interested,
but now is not the time.
440
00:15:25,218 --> 00:15:26,815
Michelle, get the bouquet.
441
00:15:26,849 --> 00:15:28,518
You're skating on very thin ice.
442
00:15:32,117 --> 00:15:34,690
I couldn't help but notice,
from afar,
443
00:15:34,724 --> 00:15:37,423
that you are both acting
like weirdoes.
444
00:15:37,457 --> 00:15:40,358
I further suspect you have not
yet talked about what happened.
445
00:15:40,392 --> 00:15:43,293
What? I don't even know
what you're talking about
446
00:15:43,327 --> 00:15:44,725
us having not talked about.
447
00:15:44,759 --> 00:15:47,227
I only meant to say
that there's no shame
448
00:15:47,261 --> 00:15:51,225
in declaring how you feel
to a person you cherish.
449
00:15:51,259 --> 00:15:53,031
I am sorry if I caused
a problem.
450
00:15:53,065 --> 00:15:55,598
Because the two of you make
a good team.
451
00:15:55,632 --> 00:15:58,566
If you'll excuse me,
I missed out on the food,
452
00:15:58,600 --> 00:16:00,837
and was denied a fascinating
conversation
453
00:16:00,870 --> 00:16:02,867
about Michigan limestone.
454
00:16:02,901 --> 00:16:05,170
But I'll be damned if I don't
properly honor the expression
455
00:16:05,204 --> 00:16:08,471
of romantic love.
456
00:16:08,505 --> 00:16:10,039
Ron does this weird thing
457
00:16:10,073 --> 00:16:11,166
where he says exactly
what he means.
458
00:16:11,208 --> 00:16:13,974
You just have to ignore him.
459
00:16:14,008 --> 00:16:17,110
So you didn't mean
what you said?
460
00:16:17,144 --> 00:16:19,876
Look, I'm all in.
That's all I meant.
461
00:16:19,910 --> 00:16:21,308
I didn't want you to think
I was crazy
462
00:16:21,350 --> 00:16:22,516
or jumping the gun.
463
00:16:22,550 --> 00:16:24,009
And I know you just got out
of a relationship
464
00:16:24,044 --> 00:16:25,975
so I don't expect you to feel
the same way.
465
00:16:26,017 --> 00:16:28,877
But that's how I feel.
466
00:16:33,685 --> 00:16:37,385
Well, I'm only dating you
for the free dresses, so...
467
00:16:37,419 --> 00:16:39,289
I'm fine with that.
468
00:16:39,323 --> 00:16:40,953
[choir singing]
469
00:16:40,987 --> 00:16:44,587
Donna, even though I've known
you for years,
470
00:16:44,621 --> 00:16:48,090
I feel like I learn something
new about you every day.
471
00:16:48,124 --> 00:16:50,257
Just yesterday, I learned
that the Pearl Jam album,
472
00:16:50,291 --> 00:16:53,329
Vitalogy was written about you.
473
00:16:53,363 --> 00:16:56,696
You are an amazing, confident
woman.
474
00:16:56,730 --> 00:16:58,295
And I love you.
475
00:16:58,329 --> 00:17:02,364
I know that I can be a lot.
476
00:17:02,398 --> 00:17:04,627
And a while back, I was thinking
I'd never find someone
477
00:17:04,669 --> 00:17:06,763
who loved me for me.
478
00:17:06,805 --> 00:17:09,202
But you're patient, and kind,
479
00:17:09,236 --> 00:17:11,635
and together,
480
00:17:11,677 --> 00:17:13,770
we can do anything.
481
00:17:13,804 --> 00:17:16,536
You may now kiss the bride.
482
00:17:16,578 --> 00:17:19,575
[cheers and applause]
483
00:17:23,143 --> 00:17:24,341
Hey, Roz.
484
00:17:24,375 --> 00:17:26,075
Oh, okay.
We have the zebras.
485
00:17:26,109 --> 00:17:28,189
Tell the kids not to worry,
they're coming back home.
486
00:17:28,210 --> 00:17:30,271
Also, we want to give you
a raise,
487
00:17:30,305 --> 00:17:32,007
and anything you want
to take from our house.
488
00:17:32,041 --> 00:17:33,238
Okay, bye.
489
00:17:33,280 --> 00:17:35,005
How in the world am I supposed
to run for office?
490
00:17:35,047 --> 00:17:37,277
Our lives are like
one big unexpected
491
00:17:37,311 --> 00:17:40,380
stuffed zebra emergency.
492
00:17:40,414 --> 00:17:42,178
I don't know.
What do you think I should do?
493
00:17:42,212 --> 00:17:43,481
I told you.
I'm neutral.
494
00:17:43,515 --> 00:17:45,783
Honey, you have never been
neutral on anything
495
00:17:45,817 --> 00:17:46,783
in your life.
496
00:17:46,816 --> 00:17:48,277
You have an opinion on pockets.
497
00:17:48,319 --> 00:17:50,651
Yes, I think they should
all be bigger.
498
00:17:50,685 --> 00:17:51,651
Okay.
Fine.
499
00:17:51,685 --> 00:17:53,482
I think you should run.
500
00:17:53,516 --> 00:17:55,050
Yes, our lives are bonkers.
501
00:17:55,084 --> 00:17:58,953
But if something is worth it--
and I think this is--
502
00:17:58,987 --> 00:18:00,721
then you just make it work.
503
00:18:00,755 --> 00:18:03,624
Besides, I just read an article
on two-minute micro-naps,
504
00:18:03,658 --> 00:18:05,056
and the science on them
is very promising.
505
00:18:05,098 --> 00:18:06,159
Oh, hey!
506
00:18:06,193 --> 00:18:07,727
Ben Wyatt.
Any comment on the report
507
00:18:07,761 --> 00:18:09,198
that you're running
for Congress?
508
00:18:09,232 --> 00:18:11,196
I'm sorry, I can't talk
about this right now.
509
00:18:11,230 --> 00:18:12,363
Your only experience in politics
510
00:18:12,397 --> 00:18:13,962
was as a failed mayor
at age 18--
511
00:18:13,996 --> 00:18:16,498
Okay, please, everyone,
we're at a wedding.
512
00:18:16,532 --> 00:18:18,529
And I'm holding zebras.
513
00:18:18,571 --> 00:18:20,665
I mean, what qualifies you
to take over Hartwell's seat?
514
00:18:20,707 --> 00:18:22,370
Guys, listen to me, please.
515
00:18:22,404 --> 00:18:24,274
I'm dealing with an actual
problem right now.
516
00:18:24,308 --> 00:18:28,042
Okay?
517
00:18:28,076 --> 00:18:30,850
Which, by the way,
is what I do for a living.
518
00:18:30,884 --> 00:18:34,585
I solve problems
as a budget specialist,
519
00:18:34,619 --> 00:18:35,848
and for five years
as a City Manager,
520
00:18:35,882 --> 00:18:37,447
and I'm pretty good at it.
521
00:18:37,489 --> 00:18:39,980
I have worked hard
to transform this area
522
00:18:40,022 --> 00:18:41,915
into a fiscally sound
destination
523
00:18:41,949 --> 00:18:44,682
for people who want good jobs,
and a good public education,
524
00:18:44,724 --> 00:18:46,689
and I think the results speak
for themselves.
525
00:18:46,723 --> 00:18:50,591
[cameras clicking]
526
00:18:50,625 --> 00:18:53,094
My name is Ben Wyatt,
and I'm running for Congress.
527
00:18:53,128 --> 00:18:54,661
[cameras clicking]
528
00:18:54,695 --> 00:18:57,197
Oh, my God, babe,
that was so hot.
529
00:18:58,767 --> 00:19:00,661
- Donna.
- Hey.
530
00:19:00,695 --> 00:19:02,060
How did I do?
531
00:19:02,102 --> 00:19:05,297
Everything was perfect.
You are a miracle worker.
532
00:19:05,331 --> 00:19:08,334
But I gotta say I kind of miss
the Meagle drama.
533
00:19:08,368 --> 00:19:11,069
I thought for sure somebody
was gonna do something crazy.
534
00:19:11,103 --> 00:19:13,235
But everybody's just nice
and chill.
535
00:19:13,269 --> 00:19:15,402
Anyway, I love you,
and to thank you,
536
00:19:15,436 --> 00:19:17,664
- I'm gonna try not to hug you.
- Thank you.
537
00:19:17,706 --> 00:19:19,134
- I'm going to--
- No!
538
00:19:19,168 --> 00:19:22,773
Okay, okay.
539
00:19:22,807 --> 00:19:26,036
Wyatt, why didn't you tell us
you're running for congress?
540
00:19:26,078 --> 00:19:28,906
Well, we didn't want to
steal your thunder.
541
00:19:28,940 --> 00:19:30,377
Steal my thunder?
542
00:19:30,411 --> 00:19:31,577
I'm sorry, have you seen how
I'm wearing this dress?
543
00:19:31,611 --> 00:19:33,641
[chuckles] Okay,
well in that case,
544
00:19:33,682 --> 00:19:35,942
uh, yes, I am.
545
00:19:35,976 --> 00:19:38,709
All right!
[cheers and applause]
546
00:19:38,743 --> 00:19:41,046
- To Ben.
- Donna and Joe.
547
00:19:41,080 --> 00:19:42,647
To me.
I own my own restaurant
548
00:19:42,689 --> 00:19:43,952
and several other properties.
549
00:19:43,986 --> 00:19:47,424
- That's always worth celebrating.
- Hear hear.
550
00:19:47,458 --> 00:19:48,793
Who's Garry?
551
00:19:48,827 --> 00:19:51,364
Oh, I think that's
supposed to be me.
552
00:19:51,398 --> 00:19:53,766
Ha ha. That's your new name.
Garry.
553
00:19:53,808 --> 00:19:57,236
- Garry!
All: Garry! Garry! Garry!
554
00:19:57,270 --> 00:19:59,277
- Garry! Garry!
- "Hi, I'm Garry!"
555
00:19:59,311 --> 00:20:01,310
Garry is my real name.
556
00:20:01,344 --> 00:20:03,949
Yes, after 30 years,
my coworkers are finally
557
00:20:03,983 --> 00:20:06,244
going to call me
by my real name.
558
00:20:06,278 --> 00:20:09,282
Oh, boy, I'm blessed.
559
00:20:09,316 --> 00:20:12,080
Everyone, can I have
your attention, please.
560
00:20:12,114 --> 00:20:14,917
Now it's time for a surprise
musical guest,
561
00:20:14,951 --> 00:20:18,216
One of my time favorites...
me.
562
00:20:18,250 --> 00:20:20,614
[band playing Oh, Donna]
563
00:20:20,648 --> 00:20:23,414
♪ I had a girl ♪
564
00:20:23,455 --> 00:20:26,318
♪ Donna was her name-- ♪
565
00:20:26,352 --> 00:20:28,557
Donna! Joe!
566
00:20:28,591 --> 00:20:30,386
I hope you saved a slice
of that cake
567
00:20:30,420 --> 00:20:34,056
for your estranged brother
LeVondrious!
568
00:20:34,090 --> 00:20:36,256
[all gasp]
569
00:20:36,290 --> 00:20:38,930
What's up, girl?
570
00:20:38,964 --> 00:20:41,394
Didn't expect to see your baby
bro at your wedding, huh?
571
00:20:41,436 --> 00:20:42,731
Well, I'm here...
572
00:20:42,765 --> 00:20:44,606
despite what you did to me
all those years ago.
573
00:20:44,637 --> 00:20:45,939
What I did?
574
00:20:45,973 --> 00:20:47,635
This is because of what you did.
575
00:20:47,677 --> 00:20:49,474
Oh, you must be referring
to the microwave incident.
576
00:20:49,508 --> 00:20:51,337
- Yeah.
- Don't worry.
577
00:20:51,379 --> 00:20:55,772
I brought it back.
578
00:20:55,806 --> 00:20:57,244
Well.
579
00:20:57,278 --> 00:20:58,843
[all gasp, shout]
580
00:20:58,877 --> 00:21:01,474
Now no one gets any popcorn.
581
00:21:03,781 --> 00:21:05,578
You said you wanted
a little drama.
582
00:21:05,620 --> 00:21:07,849
That's why I love you, girl!
583
00:21:07,969 --> 00:21:13,895
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com