1 00:02:15,980 --> 00:02:17,807 Third day of high school, and I, 2 00:02:18,024 --> 00:02:21,060 Victor Knudsen, was hit by an epidemic. 3 00:02:23,445 --> 00:02:26,779 And we're not talking about your everyday epidemic like chicken pox. 4 00:02:26,990 --> 00:02:31,237 Or the flu. Nope, we're talking a case of total, incurable... 5 00:02:31,453 --> 00:02:33,694 "Anya-itis". 6 00:02:35,206 --> 00:02:36,949 Hello, gorgeous. 7 00:02:37,166 --> 00:02:38,542 It's not so much the fact 8 00:02:38,751 --> 00:02:41,835 that she's the most beautiful girl in the history of the world. 9 00:02:42,046 --> 00:02:44,371 It's that... well... 10 00:02:47,801 --> 00:02:50,374 - Whassup, ladies? - Hey, Peter! 11 00:02:56,935 --> 00:02:58,643 Why don't you boys go park my precious? 12 00:02:58,853 --> 00:03:00,810 Sure thing, Peter. 13 00:03:01,022 --> 00:03:03,347 If you scratch her, you die. 14 00:03:05,526 --> 00:03:08,729 Open house this evening. Please come by. 15 00:03:20,707 --> 00:03:24,455 Nothing feels quite like expensive wheels. Not even sex. 16 00:03:27,004 --> 00:03:29,127 You ladies should stop by Nick and Ernie's party tonight. 17 00:03:29,340 --> 00:03:30,750 It's gonna be off the hook. 18 00:03:30,966 --> 00:03:34,335 Especially you mama. I'll make sure you're on the VIP list. 19 00:03:34,553 --> 00:03:36,676 Take a hike, losers. 20 00:03:36,888 --> 00:03:38,715 They'd never set foot at your retarded little party. 21 00:03:42,894 --> 00:03:44,721 Yo, Vic! 22 00:03:45,230 --> 00:03:46,640 Hey, Vic! 23 00:03:47,482 --> 00:03:49,557 Is he even alive? 24 00:03:49,775 --> 00:03:53,025 Come on, this is your big chance. 25 00:03:53,237 --> 00:03:56,191 Never mind the fact that she's the world's most unattainable girl. 26 00:03:56,407 --> 00:03:59,407 And that's... maybe her boyfriend. 27 00:03:59,618 --> 00:04:02,572 Just walk on up to her and invite her to Ernie's party tonight. 28 00:04:02,787 --> 00:04:06,999 So what if she's a Senior? Nothing. It means nothing. 29 00:04:08,626 --> 00:04:10,951 Oh my god, what a smile! 30 00:04:15,424 --> 00:04:16,705 I don't think we've been introduced. 31 00:04:16,926 --> 00:04:19,416 Huh, no we haven't. 32 00:04:20,429 --> 00:04:21,425 Those eyes... 33 00:04:22,556 --> 00:04:24,513 My name's Vic... 34 00:04:31,314 --> 00:04:32,974 "Viccup"? 35 00:04:36,944 --> 00:04:39,020 That sure looks like your geek brother trying to score. 36 00:04:39,905 --> 00:04:42,859 How freaking stupid can you be, trying to score a Senior? 37 00:04:43,075 --> 00:04:46,159 Must run in the family. You wrote Paris Hilton, didn't you? 38 00:04:46,370 --> 00:04:48,991 She's not a Senior now, is she? 39 00:04:49,206 --> 00:04:51,875 Besides, she's much more mature than high school chicks. 40 00:04:52,083 --> 00:04:53,791 Right. 41 00:04:55,545 --> 00:04:58,830 We could make the catastrophic film of the century 42 00:04:59,048 --> 00:05:00,756 about Victor and Anya. 43 00:05:00,966 --> 00:05:03,338 "What not to do when one wants to get some ass". 44 00:05:03,552 --> 00:05:05,628 We're gonna win Sundance! 45 00:05:05,846 --> 00:05:08,515 You do the directing, I'll cast the floozies. 46 00:05:08,724 --> 00:05:10,716 - Score! - Yeah! 47 00:05:12,727 --> 00:05:16,179 I think Esmeralda is just about ready... 48 00:05:16,397 --> 00:05:18,556 Adios, mamacita. 49 00:05:18,775 --> 00:05:21,182 Now there's pussy in the air, boys. 50 00:05:21,402 --> 00:05:25,316 - She sure does slide nicely. - Why Esmeralda? 51 00:05:25,531 --> 00:05:28,069 We can name her Anya if you prefer. 52 00:05:28,283 --> 00:05:29,481 What do you think Ernest? 53 00:05:29,701 --> 00:05:32,868 This is America. We can all dream, right? 54 00:05:33,538 --> 00:05:36,539 - Do you think she'll come? - Not the first few times. 55 00:05:36,750 --> 00:05:38,908 Victor, my man, she's a Senior. 56 00:05:39,127 --> 00:05:41,582 You'd have a better chance trying to score Angelina Jolie. 57 00:05:41,796 --> 00:05:45,081 I don't exactly think she walks around dreaming about a 15 year old 58 00:05:45,299 --> 00:05:49,083 who's never had any, except his own right hand. 59 00:06:14,326 --> 00:06:17,446 - Get lost, you little rug rat! - Alright, fine. I'll leave. 60 00:06:17,663 --> 00:06:18,493 I'm sorry, 61 00:06:18,705 --> 00:06:21,077 I thought you were my hideous little brother and his stupid camera. 62 00:06:21,291 --> 00:06:25,039 I don't think Brian looks this great in a dress. 63 00:06:26,504 --> 00:06:29,838 Very sexy. You're out for some trouble tonight, aren't you? 64 00:06:30,049 --> 00:06:32,042 - Aren't I always? - Yeah. 65 00:06:34,720 --> 00:06:36,511 - Anya's bedroom, take four. - Marker! 66 00:06:36,722 --> 00:06:39,639 Brian and Zack, that's it!! Get the hell out of my room! 67 00:06:39,850 --> 00:06:41,392 One more time from the top, Sis. 68 00:06:41,602 --> 00:06:42,930 And maybe you could lose the bathrobe in this take? 69 00:06:44,104 --> 00:06:45,931 Out now! 70 00:06:46,147 --> 00:06:46,847 Keep that expression, Anya. 71 00:06:47,065 --> 00:06:49,307 You're totally challenging Uma Thurman in Kill Bill! 72 00:06:49,526 --> 00:06:50,984 Get out! Scram! 73 00:06:54,655 --> 00:06:57,775 Come on Anya, get dressed. 74 00:06:57,992 --> 00:07:00,909 The Froshes are having a party and we're crashing it! 75 00:07:01,120 --> 00:07:02,530 What, Freshmen? 76 00:07:02,746 --> 00:07:06,032 Sure you'll fit right in. They don't have sex either. 77 00:07:06,833 --> 00:07:07,829 Thanks. 78 00:07:27,436 --> 00:07:30,436 - Hey, Ernie! - What's up, baby? 79 00:07:41,490 --> 00:07:44,859 No sandals next time, buddy. We're running a classy joint here. 80 00:07:46,537 --> 00:07:49,906 Luckily, I'm in a good mood. Hello. 81 00:07:50,415 --> 00:07:52,906 Wearing dancing shoes. 82 00:07:56,880 --> 00:07:58,160 So, have you seen her yet? 83 00:07:58,381 --> 00:08:02,509 If you are referring to your lady friend Anya, she was just here. 84 00:08:02,719 --> 00:08:04,676 - I told her to take a hike. - You did what? 85 00:08:04,887 --> 00:08:07,129 She didn't have an invitation, man. What do you want from me? 86 00:08:07,348 --> 00:08:09,839 But she doesn't, she doesn't need a...a... 87 00:08:10,059 --> 00:08:13,262 Bu, bu, but... Okay, geez, I'm just joking. 88 00:08:13,478 --> 00:08:15,850 That broad has totally ruined your sense of humor. 89 00:08:16,064 --> 00:08:18,982 Madames, proceed to the Garden of Eden. 90 00:08:19,442 --> 00:08:21,020 Nice! 91 00:08:21,236 --> 00:08:23,359 Yo, this place is packed with hotties. 92 00:08:23,571 --> 00:08:26,525 Forget about Anya and just grab whatever you can get. 93 00:08:26,741 --> 00:08:28,069 Which isn't a whole lot, 94 00:08:28,284 --> 00:08:31,154 but, you know, there's gotta be someone desperate enough. 95 00:08:32,913 --> 00:08:37,242 Man, you are a lost cause. Go make sure Ernie's still standing, will you? 96 00:08:38,043 --> 00:08:40,450 Come on, lets just try to get into Avalon instead. 97 00:08:40,670 --> 00:08:43,126 Peter just texted me and said it'd be happening tonight. 98 00:08:43,340 --> 00:08:46,424 Peter should just be happy you are practicing on some toddlers. 99 00:08:46,634 --> 00:08:48,294 Thanks for the confidence. 100 00:08:51,347 --> 00:08:54,632 - Are you still scared? - Of what? 101 00:08:54,850 --> 00:08:56,677 Of actually doing it with Peter. 102 00:08:56,894 --> 00:08:58,685 No. 103 00:08:59,229 --> 00:09:03,143 I mean, when we're alone together he's really nice, 104 00:09:03,358 --> 00:09:05,564 and he says all the right things, it's just... 105 00:09:05,777 --> 00:09:08,350 Anya, if you don't wanna do it, you shouldn't do it. 106 00:09:08,571 --> 00:09:11,109 I do want to, I'm ready! 107 00:09:13,034 --> 00:09:16,983 I don't know. I guess I'm just not sure if he's the right one. 108 00:09:18,038 --> 00:09:22,285 Listen, you can't just throw away a woman's greatest treasure, 109 00:09:22,501 --> 00:09:24,577 just because he wants you to. 110 00:09:24,795 --> 00:09:28,246 You have to wait for your one true love. 111 00:09:28,465 --> 00:09:31,216 The one you're gonna marry. 112 00:09:35,471 --> 00:09:38,140 - What was that? - It's in the Bible. 113 00:09:41,352 --> 00:09:43,593 You guys ever hear of role playing? 114 00:09:43,812 --> 00:09:45,556 You got it, doll. 115 00:09:53,488 --> 00:09:56,691 Two of Ernie's famous home juice. 116 00:09:59,368 --> 00:10:02,654 Get lost girls, Hanna Montana starts in 5 minutes. 117 00:10:05,207 --> 00:10:06,536 What was that? 118 00:10:13,882 --> 00:10:15,625 Hi... 119 00:10:17,302 --> 00:10:19,460 Such a lovely dress you're wearing, Anya. 120 00:10:20,596 --> 00:10:24,048 Nice fabric. They don't make them like that anymore. 121 00:10:24,267 --> 00:10:26,342 I just bought it, so I guess they do. 122 00:10:29,355 --> 00:10:31,762 Okay, Tom Ford, fashion week is over. 123 00:10:31,982 --> 00:10:34,852 - I'm Victor. - Hi. 124 00:10:37,154 --> 00:10:38,648 Are you coming or what? 125 00:10:38,863 --> 00:10:41,401 It's the nicest dress I've seen all night. 126 00:10:42,575 --> 00:10:43,239 Okay. 127 00:10:45,745 --> 00:10:49,161 That freshie really liked your dress. 128 00:10:49,373 --> 00:10:51,994 Hey, let's make a bet, whoever gets a freshie hooked first, 129 00:10:52,209 --> 00:10:54,700 has to pick up the tab later on at Avalon. 130 00:10:54,920 --> 00:10:56,628 You're on. 131 00:11:07,515 --> 00:11:10,469 It's the nicest dress I've seen all night? 132 00:11:10,685 --> 00:11:14,468 That's the dumbest thing I've said in my entire life! 133 00:11:18,525 --> 00:11:20,814 Ooooh! 134 00:11:21,820 --> 00:11:23,896 Freak out time! 135 00:11:48,261 --> 00:11:51,677 Just, just, just walk up to her and say 136 00:11:51,890 --> 00:11:55,424 "Anya, baby, let's, let's groove. 137 00:11:55,643 --> 00:12:01,396 I got some... R-rated moves for ya." 138 00:12:01,607 --> 00:12:04,524 Dude, what are you doing in here, boy? 139 00:12:08,488 --> 00:12:11,109 Okay. Don't mind me. 140 00:12:12,409 --> 00:12:16,572 Hey, come on, close the door, it's not that big. 141 00:12:18,748 --> 00:12:20,871 Or, is it? 142 00:12:34,512 --> 00:12:36,220 Come on, you guys, walk! 143 00:12:36,431 --> 00:12:38,507 You can do it. One foot after the other. 144 00:12:38,725 --> 00:12:40,682 Don't tell me you're talking to your feet, Vic? 145 00:12:40,893 --> 00:12:44,060 - No, I, I.... - Just go on up to her, man. Come on. 146 00:12:45,690 --> 00:12:46,769 Just do it, Vic. 147 00:12:49,109 --> 00:12:50,901 Do it, man, 148 00:12:55,949 --> 00:12:59,448 Here comes your lover boy to comment on your dress again. 149 00:13:01,496 --> 00:13:04,829 I sense your credit card's gonna hit the limit tonight. 150 00:13:22,182 --> 00:13:25,681 Victor, my man, you obviously have something important to say. 151 00:13:28,020 --> 00:13:29,396 I'm, I'm sorry, what was that? 152 00:13:30,898 --> 00:13:33,519 Any hiccup experts in the house? 153 00:13:33,734 --> 00:13:34,849 I know a good trick. 154 00:13:50,208 --> 00:13:52,781 Come on, you've tortured Victor long enough. 155 00:14:02,177 --> 00:14:07,717 So Victor, do you want me to try to fix these hiccups of yours? 156 00:14:09,392 --> 00:14:14,469 I'll give you a great, big kiss if you can do one more hiccup for me. 157 00:14:39,462 --> 00:14:41,335 Victor? 158 00:14:42,506 --> 00:14:44,499 Victor? 159 00:14:44,717 --> 00:14:46,626 Victor! 160 00:14:52,140 --> 00:14:54,548 So, what will it be, big boy? 161 00:15:05,778 --> 00:15:06,394 Go, buddy! 162 00:15:06,612 --> 00:15:08,071 I, I can't do it. 163 00:15:09,656 --> 00:15:13,606 But the most important thing is that your hiccups are cured, right? 164 00:15:15,328 --> 00:15:17,535 Guess I'm stuck paying the tab tonight. 165 00:15:17,747 --> 00:15:22,124 That's the price you have to pay for having such a "lovely dress". 166 00:15:25,755 --> 00:15:30,048 - Hey, I got the hiccups too! - No, no, no, no, I do! 167 00:15:44,772 --> 00:15:47,477 She would have kissed me! 168 00:16:05,166 --> 00:16:08,001 Zachary Jaaaaaaaaames!!!! 169 00:16:08,211 --> 00:16:11,212 That's my name, don't wear it out. I got the copyright, lady. 170 00:16:11,422 --> 00:16:14,423 You know I can't stand spiders! 171 00:16:20,889 --> 00:16:22,597 Then it's a good thing it's made out of licorice. 172 00:16:22,808 --> 00:16:25,299 Where did I go wrong? 173 00:16:25,519 --> 00:16:28,887 - When you and Dad were getting.... - Yes, thank you, young man. 174 00:16:32,608 --> 00:16:34,731 Sounds like you woke up your mom, Zachary. 175 00:16:34,944 --> 00:16:37,731 - Good morning. - Hi, Dad. 176 00:16:37,947 --> 00:16:40,105 What about Victor? Is he up yet? 177 00:16:40,324 --> 00:16:41,984 The old booze hound is hung over. 178 00:16:42,201 --> 00:16:44,692 Oh, don't be silly. Your brother doesn't drink. 179 00:16:44,912 --> 00:16:46,738 Yeah, and I don't dig girls over 18. 180 00:16:48,331 --> 00:16:52,245 Victor, breakfast is ready! 181 00:16:52,752 --> 00:16:55,290 Oh, good morning. 182 00:16:57,465 --> 00:16:59,256 So son, any nice-looking girls there last night? 183 00:16:59,467 --> 00:17:01,293 - Yeah, did you get any pussy? - Zachary! 184 00:17:01,510 --> 00:17:03,633 You need to use a different language, young man! 185 00:17:03,846 --> 00:17:07,179 Yes, Mom. Hizole consigue coņo? 186 00:17:08,100 --> 00:17:10,009 Did you get to bump into any big jugs? 187 00:17:10,227 --> 00:17:11,472 Stop it! 188 00:17:11,686 --> 00:17:13,726 Back in my day, we called them melons. 189 00:17:13,938 --> 00:17:15,053 Christian! 190 00:17:15,273 --> 00:17:17,598 Well, some people did, but, no, no, not me. 191 00:17:17,817 --> 00:17:19,276 You know, I better get back to work. 192 00:17:20,778 --> 00:17:23,399 - Oh, don't forget this one. - Thank you, son. 193 00:17:24,865 --> 00:17:25,944 See you. 194 00:17:26,158 --> 00:17:30,025 So, what kind of trouble are you boys planning on getting into today? 195 00:17:30,245 --> 00:17:31,704 Nothing out of the ordinary, 196 00:17:31,914 --> 00:17:33,871 Maybe knock over a liquor store, hit the titty bar. 197 00:17:34,082 --> 00:17:35,493 Oh, that's great! 198 00:17:36,710 --> 00:17:41,418 Hey, Mom, did anyone call? 199 00:17:41,631 --> 00:17:45,463 No. Who would have called? 200 00:17:46,427 --> 00:17:48,752 Oh, I don't know. 201 00:17:51,640 --> 00:17:54,096 What if she's crazy about me, but just doesn't know it yet? 202 00:17:54,309 --> 00:17:57,595 In theory she already kissed me. It's all subconscious. 203 00:17:58,021 --> 00:17:59,432 She even smiled at me this morning. 204 00:18:00,607 --> 00:18:03,643 Anya's the type who'd smile at a child molester. 205 00:18:04,569 --> 00:18:07,523 If she likes you so much, why don't you go over and talk to her? 206 00:18:07,738 --> 00:18:10,443 Well, she's sitting with all the Seniors. 207 00:18:10,658 --> 00:18:13,742 What about that smart-ass Peter? Is she dating him or what? 208 00:18:13,953 --> 00:18:16,622 No, I'm sure they're just really good friends. 209 00:18:16,830 --> 00:18:19,617 Is Victor Knudsen really gonna go down in history 210 00:18:19,833 --> 00:18:24,293 as the Kentucky fried chicken who didn't dare fight for his own woman? 211 00:18:27,674 --> 00:18:28,504 You're right. 212 00:18:28,716 --> 00:18:32,251 No, time out, time out. Are you sure there are no hiccups on their way up? 213 00:18:32,470 --> 00:18:33,501 I got it covered. 214 00:18:33,721 --> 00:18:37,421 I didn't drink a single sip of water today, or yesterday. 215 00:18:38,308 --> 00:18:40,348 Good luck, Titanic! 216 00:18:40,561 --> 00:18:43,016 Can't you faint from dehydration? 217 00:18:44,815 --> 00:18:46,012 What's up ladies? 218 00:18:51,904 --> 00:18:54,858 Is this Candid Camera or did you just say "what's up ladies"? 219 00:18:57,076 --> 00:18:59,614 I just wanted to say how great it was to see you at the party. 220 00:19:01,038 --> 00:19:02,781 Me and my dress? 221 00:19:05,667 --> 00:19:08,039 Don't you know little Freshmen aren't allowed at the Senior table? 222 00:19:08,962 --> 00:19:12,081 Last I checked there was no reservation sign. 223 00:19:15,051 --> 00:19:17,458 Listen, you punk, I don't know what you're trying to pull here, 224 00:19:17,678 --> 00:19:19,338 but don't ever talk to any of us ever again 225 00:19:19,555 --> 00:19:21,797 or I'll split your skull in two! 226 00:19:23,517 --> 00:19:25,889 Go buy yourself a Hershey's kiss, kid. 227 00:19:26,103 --> 00:19:29,187 No one in their right mind would ever give such a loser one for free. 228 00:19:33,234 --> 00:19:35,274 - Nice one! - Huh? You like that? Like that? 229 00:19:35,487 --> 00:19:36,601 Well done. 230 00:19:41,784 --> 00:19:44,701 "Go buy yourself a Hershey's kiss, kid". 231 00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:50,116 - Hurry up. - Relax already. 232 00:19:52,878 --> 00:19:54,704 Check the stalls, will ya? 233 00:19:59,592 --> 00:20:01,917 Clear. Make this quick. 234 00:20:02,303 --> 00:20:06,087 I seem to remember you never liked it when I was too quick about it. 235 00:20:06,307 --> 00:20:11,348 Look, I'm sick and tired of Anya and her unspoiled, virgin bullshit. 236 00:20:11,562 --> 00:20:12,593 What is she trying to prove? 237 00:20:12,813 --> 00:20:16,063 Don't worry, she knows she can't graduate a virgin. 238 00:20:16,274 --> 00:20:17,555 She said that? 239 00:20:17,776 --> 00:20:20,064 She said she wants to do it soon, 240 00:20:20,278 --> 00:20:23,777 and I told her the best way is to do it with someone with experience. 241 00:20:23,990 --> 00:20:25,318 Someone who know's what he's doing. 242 00:20:27,451 --> 00:20:29,740 Thanks for the compliment. Can't you... 243 00:20:29,954 --> 00:20:31,578 Prepare her a bit? 244 00:20:31,789 --> 00:20:35,158 - Prepare her, are you crazy?! - Just give her a few tips. 245 00:20:35,375 --> 00:20:37,701 I'm going to her house on Wednesday while her parents are playing Bridge. 246 00:20:37,919 --> 00:20:40,327 Seriously Peter, that's between you two. 247 00:20:40,547 --> 00:20:44,331 I wanna see my girl happy and I am not pushing her to do it. 248 00:20:50,640 --> 00:20:52,513 It was a lot easier with you back in the day. 249 00:20:52,725 --> 00:20:54,599 All it took was a ride in the Precious Junior 250 00:20:54,810 --> 00:20:56,850 and a twenty buck dinner. 251 00:20:57,062 --> 00:21:00,431 Besides, when I've had Anya too, you girls can finally discuss sex. 252 00:21:00,649 --> 00:21:03,270 So, I guess I'll basically be doing you a favor. 253 00:21:03,485 --> 00:21:05,145 Chupa mi verga. 254 00:21:05,362 --> 00:21:07,817 Keep talking dirty, baby. 255 00:21:13,369 --> 00:21:17,283 Okay, Casanova. So you're gonna tell this girl you barely know 256 00:21:17,498 --> 00:21:20,582 that she shouldn't sleep with her boyfriend even though she wants to? 257 00:21:20,793 --> 00:21:25,253 Well, he's not really her boyfriend. But... yeah. 258 00:21:25,464 --> 00:21:27,954 - Great plan, Vic. - lt's not so bad. 259 00:21:29,259 --> 00:21:33,173 - Ah, God, you're so young. - But Peter doesn't love her! 260 00:21:33,388 --> 00:21:36,175 So? When did that become mandatory for love making? 261 00:21:37,350 --> 00:21:39,675 Come on guys, her house isn't that far away. 262 00:21:40,853 --> 00:21:43,426 - Hancock Park. - Oh, that's a rich neighborhood. 263 00:21:43,647 --> 00:21:46,399 Yeah, I bought the address off Zack. He's friends with her little brother. 264 00:21:46,608 --> 00:21:49,064 Doesn't that make you two practically related? 265 00:21:49,464 --> 00:21:52,664 - Woah! - Woah! 266 00:21:52,777 --> 00:21:55,032 Yo, the girl that your in love with 267 00:21:55,450 --> 00:21:58,119 happens just to be your cousin, 268 00:21:58,327 --> 00:22:01,412 Oh, doesn't that hurt a little buzzing... 269 00:22:01,622 --> 00:22:04,539 Going around in your little wedgie stomach. 270 00:22:04,750 --> 00:22:08,368 I can't believe your feelings just took a plummet. 271 00:22:12,382 --> 00:22:15,217 I can't rap, man, but I'm doing it for you! 272 00:22:15,760 --> 00:22:17,041 It's right there. 273 00:22:17,262 --> 00:22:19,931 - Wow! - Oooohhh! 274 00:22:23,726 --> 00:22:27,510 Damn! Your future wife is loaded! 275 00:22:29,189 --> 00:22:34,184 You guys stay here. I'll handle this. 276 00:22:35,695 --> 00:22:37,355 Heads up, Vic! 277 00:22:38,490 --> 00:22:41,490 - Hi, Victor! - Hey there, Anya. 278 00:22:42,619 --> 00:22:44,278 So, how about that? 279 00:22:44,495 --> 00:22:47,069 - It's almost Wednesday, huh? - Yeah, I guess so. 280 00:22:47,290 --> 00:22:48,748 You live around here? 281 00:22:48,958 --> 00:22:53,370 Uh, yeah, yeah. Um... no. 282 00:22:53,796 --> 00:22:56,915 - Here, ah, let me get those. - Thanks. 283 00:22:57,132 --> 00:22:59,623 So, ah, what's up with all the cans? 284 00:22:59,843 --> 00:23:01,218 Huh? 285 00:23:03,013 --> 00:23:04,127 Hi Anya! 286 00:23:04,347 --> 00:23:09,092 Well, we're turning great profits from the party by selling them. 287 00:23:10,102 --> 00:23:11,347 I didn't know you were such a business man. 288 00:23:11,562 --> 00:23:13,270 Oh, yeah, sure. 289 00:23:13,481 --> 00:23:17,063 You know, me and old Billy Gates, ha. 290 00:23:17,609 --> 00:23:18,854 Let the profits go to charity. 291 00:23:19,319 --> 00:23:23,233 China, Af-Africa, Ca-California... 292 00:23:26,326 --> 00:23:30,952 - So, it's almost Wednesday, huh? - You said that already. 293 00:23:31,164 --> 00:23:34,248 I did, I did, yeah. That must make it a fact then. 294 00:23:35,459 --> 00:23:39,042 Look, I came to tell you, um... I wanted to ask you... 295 00:23:43,467 --> 00:23:44,925 You know my little brother Zack, right? 296 00:23:45,135 --> 00:23:47,708 He's friends with your little brother. Small world, huh? Ha, ha. 297 00:23:48,638 --> 00:23:50,796 So Zack's your little brother. 298 00:23:51,015 --> 00:23:52,807 Is that a good thing, or? 299 00:23:54,394 --> 00:23:59,600 Yeah, yeah, he is. Good old Zackie, he's a real... bro. 300 00:24:00,024 --> 00:24:01,815 Victor, is everything alright? 301 00:24:02,026 --> 00:24:08,110 Hell, no. Yeah! Yeah, yeah, everything's just... dandy. 302 00:24:08,698 --> 00:24:11,569 - Well, I gotta get going. - Are you going to Peter's? Or... 303 00:24:12,952 --> 00:24:17,910 No, I actually have an interview at USC. 304 00:24:19,125 --> 00:24:22,375 I'm really nervous. 305 00:24:23,254 --> 00:24:25,626 Do, do I look alright? 306 00:24:27,299 --> 00:24:30,502 You look... beautiful. 307 00:24:32,846 --> 00:24:36,096 Cool. I, I mean, thank you. 308 00:24:37,100 --> 00:24:38,724 I'll see you later, Victor. 309 00:24:49,945 --> 00:24:53,989 Oh, and I really don't want you to sleep with Peter on Wednesday. 310 00:24:55,200 --> 00:24:57,109 Come... 311 00:24:57,786 --> 00:24:58,735 I don't... 312 00:25:01,289 --> 00:25:02,202 Come on, what? 313 00:25:07,795 --> 00:25:10,547 It's a great opening. We need to make it juicier, though. 314 00:25:10,756 --> 00:25:12,215 Not to worry. That's under control. 315 00:25:13,801 --> 00:25:16,718 Victor's going to a party on Saturday. 316 00:25:16,928 --> 00:25:19,087 Anya would be delighted to see Victor, 317 00:25:19,306 --> 00:25:22,010 Saturday, September 10th at 3 PM, 318 00:25:22,225 --> 00:25:26,223 for her 18th birthday celebration. 3 PM. 319 00:25:26,437 --> 00:25:28,477 That's an hour after all the grown-ups arrive. 320 00:25:28,689 --> 00:25:30,682 I like where your head's at. 321 00:25:32,943 --> 00:25:33,857 One question gentlemen. 322 00:25:34,069 --> 00:25:38,114 The invasion of Normandy is what? 323 00:25:38,323 --> 00:25:40,280 Took place when? Lead by whom? 324 00:25:40,492 --> 00:25:44,240 Sorry, Mein Fräulein, that's three questions, not one. 325 00:25:45,789 --> 00:25:49,323 D-day, 6th of June 1944. 326 00:25:49,542 --> 00:25:50,953 General Eisenhower. 327 00:25:51,169 --> 00:25:53,624 Damn, you ought to teach that shit! 328 00:25:53,838 --> 00:25:58,215 Yes. And you ought to get down to the principal's office. Now! 329 00:25:58,425 --> 00:26:01,711 - Herut! - Ooo! 330 00:26:05,932 --> 00:26:07,095 It's only an overnight trip, right? 331 00:26:07,309 --> 00:26:08,304 Yeah. So, I'm not gonna pass. 332 00:26:08,518 --> 00:26:12,101 - So it's Wednesday. - Yeah. 333 00:26:14,232 --> 00:26:15,642 I can't believe that. 334 00:26:15,858 --> 00:26:16,889 Yeah in Study Hall. 335 00:26:17,360 --> 00:26:20,029 I'm sorry we can't help you out tonight. 336 00:26:21,405 --> 00:26:22,947 Yeah. 337 00:26:25,701 --> 00:26:27,029 Ernie... 338 00:26:28,286 --> 00:26:31,073 Sorry, we gotta bounce. 339 00:26:31,831 --> 00:26:33,824 The Lakers await us. 340 00:26:36,127 --> 00:26:37,669 You gonna be okay. 341 00:26:41,257 --> 00:26:43,498 Good luck, Vic. 342 00:26:52,225 --> 00:26:56,353 This Napa Pinot is elegantly smooth, 343 00:26:56,563 --> 00:26:59,398 full bodied, with a hint of blueberry. 344 00:27:00,691 --> 00:27:03,692 And it has an exquisite nose. 345 00:27:09,533 --> 00:27:10,446 Cheers, darling. 346 00:27:11,201 --> 00:27:12,779 Cheers. 347 00:27:22,754 --> 00:27:25,209 I think it tastes a little stale. 348 00:27:25,423 --> 00:27:27,083 Stale? 349 00:27:28,759 --> 00:27:31,630 - I'll give you stale! Huh? - What? Nooo! Nooo! 350 00:27:31,845 --> 00:27:32,675 Huh? Huh? 351 00:27:32,888 --> 00:27:34,596 What? Huh? 352 00:27:34,806 --> 00:27:36,716 Seriously! Stop! 353 00:27:51,697 --> 00:27:52,610 Your turn. 354 00:27:53,365 --> 00:27:57,279 - I'm actually a little cold. - I'll keep you warm. 355 00:28:08,755 --> 00:28:09,620 What the hell? 356 00:28:12,675 --> 00:28:14,169 We'll pretend like no one's home. 357 00:28:14,385 --> 00:28:17,006 Oh, no, no, no, let me just go check it out really quick. 358 00:28:24,728 --> 00:28:25,890 Hi, Anya. 359 00:28:26,646 --> 00:28:29,481 Hey, what are you doing here? 360 00:28:29,691 --> 00:28:33,819 Well, call me a mama's boy, but I promised I would pick up Zack. 361 00:28:34,028 --> 00:28:37,278 He's not here. Brian's with my parents playing Bridge. 362 00:28:38,199 --> 00:28:41,034 Really? You sure you don't have him hiding in here somewhere? 363 00:28:42,828 --> 00:28:45,829 What the hell is hiccups doing here? 364 00:28:46,039 --> 00:28:48,708 Ah, I just swung by to pick up my kid brother. 365 00:28:48,917 --> 00:28:51,324 But apparently he's not here. 366 00:28:51,544 --> 00:28:53,501 Why in the world would your brother be here? 367 00:28:53,713 --> 00:28:54,876 He's friends with Brian. 368 00:28:55,089 --> 00:28:56,418 Exactly. 369 00:28:57,383 --> 00:29:00,170 Well, I hope I'm not disturbing anything? 370 00:29:01,095 --> 00:29:04,179 Not anything we can't get back to. 371 00:29:05,307 --> 00:29:08,391 - Well, I guess you better be going. - Peter, don't be rude! 372 00:29:08,602 --> 00:29:11,686 No, I'll, I'll leave you two to do it... 373 00:29:12,772 --> 00:29:14,101 to it! 374 00:29:15,108 --> 00:29:16,685 See you later, Victor. 375 00:29:16,901 --> 00:29:18,645 Time for bed. Kindergarten starts early. 376 00:29:18,861 --> 00:29:21,150 What? Huh... 377 00:29:27,578 --> 00:29:32,038 Okay. Where were we? Oh, yeah. 378 00:29:42,091 --> 00:29:46,919 Yeah, right there. Right there. Yeah! You feel that? It's pectorals. 379 00:29:56,438 --> 00:29:58,976 Feel those pectorals, baby? It's muscle. 380 00:30:00,317 --> 00:30:03,068 - What the hell is this? - I guess tonight isn't our night. 381 00:30:04,821 --> 00:30:06,730 No shit, Sherlock! 382 00:30:14,121 --> 00:30:14,821 Victor?! 383 00:30:15,039 --> 00:30:19,617 I'm really sorry to bother you, but I can't find my wallet. 384 00:30:19,835 --> 00:30:22,207 So I was trying to back track my night, and I thought, 385 00:30:22,420 --> 00:30:26,632 well, I couldn't possibly have left it here, could I? 386 00:30:26,841 --> 00:30:29,130 Unless you threw the thing through the door when we weren't looking! 387 00:30:29,343 --> 00:30:31,087 You, you didn't come in really. 388 00:30:32,013 --> 00:30:34,301 That's true. 389 00:30:40,103 --> 00:30:41,895 Is there something going on that I don't know about? 390 00:30:42,105 --> 00:30:43,730 Do you drop by several times every night? 391 00:30:43,940 --> 00:30:46,265 - No. - Of course not. 392 00:30:46,860 --> 00:30:48,520 Are you trying to cock block me or something? 393 00:30:48,736 --> 00:30:50,943 Look, I, I hope you find your wallet. 394 00:30:51,155 --> 00:30:52,234 Thanks. 395 00:30:52,448 --> 00:30:54,322 Let's see, your little brother, your wallet, 396 00:30:54,534 --> 00:30:56,573 Is there anything else you want us to check for? 397 00:30:58,829 --> 00:31:00,786 Nope. I think that's about it. 398 00:31:00,998 --> 00:31:02,456 Great! 399 00:31:05,961 --> 00:31:06,874 You alright? 400 00:31:07,087 --> 00:31:08,285 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 401 00:31:08,505 --> 00:31:12,882 I'm fine, I'm fine... Unless it wouldn't be too much trouble... 402 00:31:13,509 --> 00:31:15,751 Could I get a glass of milk? 403 00:31:17,930 --> 00:31:21,264 Whole milk. My personal favorite. 404 00:31:21,475 --> 00:31:26,018 Lots of energy. Tasty, yet... 405 00:31:26,271 --> 00:31:28,228 Whole. 406 00:31:43,287 --> 00:31:44,485 More? 407 00:31:44,705 --> 00:31:48,074 Ah, what the hell. The night's still young. Fill me up. 408 00:32:13,148 --> 00:32:15,935 Well, thanks for the drink. 409 00:32:16,151 --> 00:32:17,894 You sure you don't want more? 410 00:32:18,111 --> 00:32:20,566 They say to drink a full gallon when you're still growing. 411 00:32:20,780 --> 00:32:24,398 Naa, I shouldn't. Biking. 412 00:32:25,952 --> 00:32:28,028 I'll put this bad boy in the dishwasher. Make myself useful. 413 00:32:28,245 --> 00:32:30,368 - No, that's not necessary, Victor. - I got it. 414 00:32:35,127 --> 00:32:38,792 - Where do the dishes go? - I'll take care of it! Useless! 415 00:32:39,423 --> 00:32:41,332 Guess I better be going! 416 00:32:42,217 --> 00:32:45,134 Thanks for stopping by, and if you need a bedtime story or get hungry... 417 00:32:45,970 --> 00:32:48,591 - Do it at home. Okay?! - Okay. 418 00:32:48,806 --> 00:32:51,095 - See you later. - Much, much later! 419 00:32:51,934 --> 00:32:53,808 Jesus, God! 420 00:32:55,145 --> 00:32:57,553 I don't believe that kid! 421 00:32:57,773 --> 00:33:01,224 I bet you in five minutes he'll want to borrow 3 eggs for a cup cake. 422 00:33:01,443 --> 00:33:03,151 Oh, he's not that bad. 423 00:33:03,361 --> 00:33:04,275 "What's up, ladies? 424 00:33:04,487 --> 00:33:07,607 My name is Victor. I'm a mama's boy picking up my little brother!" 425 00:33:08,867 --> 00:33:11,737 I think he's sweet, in his own dorky way. 426 00:33:11,953 --> 00:33:15,037 Sweet? Oh. I'll show you sweet. 427 00:33:25,424 --> 00:33:27,630 I only play to win, Roger. 428 00:33:28,677 --> 00:33:32,544 All I'm saying is, if I open with two diamonds... 429 00:33:32,764 --> 00:33:36,298 It isn't particularly intelligent of you to call "no trumps". 430 00:33:36,517 --> 00:33:39,352 I mean for God's sake, there weren't any more spades! 431 00:33:39,562 --> 00:33:40,890 It's called bluffing, my darling. 432 00:33:41,105 --> 00:33:43,181 You saw it for yourself, they had no idea what I was doing. 433 00:33:43,399 --> 00:33:44,312 Well, neither did I! 434 00:33:44,525 --> 00:33:46,683 They're probably perking like pigs right now. 435 00:33:46,902 --> 00:33:49,060 Watch your language, young man! 436 00:33:55,243 --> 00:33:58,362 You know, maybe we should ring the bell, just in case. 437 00:33:58,579 --> 00:34:01,284 We are the ones who live here, are we not? 438 00:34:01,499 --> 00:34:03,740 Yeah, remember when your mother and father walked in on us? 439 00:34:03,959 --> 00:34:06,248 We were on the kitchen counter... 440 00:34:07,838 --> 00:34:09,546 I'm gonna ring. I'm gonna ring. 441 00:34:13,552 --> 00:34:15,544 That's it, you cock blocking son of a bitch! 442 00:34:15,762 --> 00:34:18,549 No more Anya to stand between you and my fist! 443 00:34:18,765 --> 00:34:22,928 Why don't you fuck off so I can finally fuck her!!! 444 00:34:27,106 --> 00:34:29,644 Mr. and Mrs. Benton. Hi. 445 00:34:31,151 --> 00:34:33,607 We were just doing some homework. 446 00:34:33,820 --> 00:34:35,813 Drama. 447 00:34:39,284 --> 00:34:42,119 You wanna put your shirt on? 448 00:34:43,329 --> 00:34:44,325 How was Bridge? 449 00:34:44,539 --> 00:34:48,287 You're right. Peter's facial expression is priceless! 450 00:34:49,376 --> 00:34:52,745 I know, the sunglass cam was definitely a good investment. 451 00:34:52,963 --> 00:34:55,252 Especially with the stuff of my dad cheating in Bridge too. 452 00:34:55,465 --> 00:34:58,170 Yeah, that will make us a nice blackmail payoff. 453 00:34:58,385 --> 00:35:00,461 So, what do you think we'll make on this film? 454 00:35:00,679 --> 00:35:02,718 A couple hundred million at least. 455 00:35:02,931 --> 00:35:05,766 That's what those French folks got from the animal video on YouPorn. 456 00:35:05,975 --> 00:35:08,548 Oh, the one with the porcupine and the giraffe screwing? 457 00:35:08,769 --> 00:35:12,601 Dude! And those are mammals. We're getting people! 458 00:35:12,815 --> 00:35:16,397 - People are mammals, stupid. - Whatever. 459 00:35:30,289 --> 00:35:32,531 Benton residence, talk to me, bitch. 460 00:35:33,501 --> 00:35:36,537 Hi. It's Victor. Is Anya there? 461 00:35:36,754 --> 00:35:38,960 It's Victor. He's actually buying it. 462 00:35:40,174 --> 00:35:42,499 Well, she's out taking a dump. 463 00:35:44,553 --> 00:35:46,213 Are you coming to her birthday party? 464 00:35:46,429 --> 00:35:48,505 I know she really wants to see you. 465 00:35:48,723 --> 00:35:51,641 Really? Yeah, I'd love to come. 466 00:35:51,851 --> 00:35:54,057 Do you know what kind of present she would like? 467 00:35:54,937 --> 00:35:56,894 The idiot wants to know what she wants for her birthday! 468 00:36:06,740 --> 00:36:09,990 Well Vic, if you really wanna make my sister happy, 469 00:36:10,202 --> 00:36:12,194 you'll buy her a tarantula. 470 00:36:12,412 --> 00:36:14,950 She's wanted one of those things since she was little. 471 00:36:18,126 --> 00:36:20,877 A tarantula? Really? 472 00:36:21,087 --> 00:36:22,462 Hell, yeah. 473 00:36:22,671 --> 00:36:25,341 She's always dreamt of having a wrestling match between her lizard 474 00:36:25,633 --> 00:36:27,590 and one of them black, hairy beasts. 475 00:36:27,801 --> 00:36:31,501 I didn't even know she had a lizard. 476 00:36:31,721 --> 00:36:33,631 Alright. Thanks for the tip. 477 00:36:38,811 --> 00:36:40,555 Are you sure you guys are related? 478 00:36:40,772 --> 00:36:43,808 I know! How can anyone be that thick? 479 00:36:46,402 --> 00:36:50,779 It balances the color. That's what you gotta do, honey. 480 00:36:51,323 --> 00:36:52,354 Hey! 481 00:36:53,158 --> 00:36:54,438 Do you guys happen to know 482 00:36:54,659 --> 00:36:58,159 if tarantulas are like, really deadly poisonous? 483 00:36:58,371 --> 00:37:01,325 - Why, did you see one?! - No. No, I was just curious. 484 00:37:02,417 --> 00:37:05,168 They are one of the most dangerous of all spiders, Victor. 485 00:37:05,378 --> 00:37:07,619 - If you see one, do not touch it! - No. 486 00:37:08,964 --> 00:37:12,333 - What's in the bag, son? - Just some homework. 487 00:37:12,551 --> 00:37:13,381 Wow! 488 00:37:13,594 --> 00:37:16,001 - He's so cool. Let's keep him! - We can't keep him. 489 00:37:16,221 --> 00:37:19,257 Mom will go ballistic if she found out we had a tarantula in the house. 490 00:37:19,474 --> 00:37:22,226 Besides, it's a present for Anya. 491 00:37:24,729 --> 00:37:27,302 - Let's name him Hugo. - Don't piss him off. 492 00:37:27,523 --> 00:37:31,141 - Let's find a dog and feed it. - They don't eat dogs, you idiot! 493 00:37:31,360 --> 00:37:35,571 The big ones do. The Turners down the street, they own a Chihuahua. 494 00:37:35,781 --> 00:37:37,987 - Zack, where are you? - Mom! Mom! Get the door! 495 00:37:42,037 --> 00:37:43,235 Zack! 496 00:37:47,083 --> 00:37:49,122 Zachary James! 497 00:37:49,335 --> 00:37:50,117 What the hell? 498 00:37:51,546 --> 00:37:54,333 I guess he's stronger than we thought. And hungrier... 499 00:37:54,548 --> 00:37:57,585 Oh, no! No, no, no, no. We have to find him now! 500 00:37:58,427 --> 00:37:59,755 Where are you? 501 00:38:01,263 --> 00:38:02,294 Zach! 502 00:38:03,265 --> 00:38:04,510 Arrrhhhh. 503 00:38:05,642 --> 00:38:06,638 You're such a wimp. 504 00:38:06,851 --> 00:38:08,346 Whatever you're doing, young man, don't! 505 00:38:08,561 --> 00:38:09,676 Zach! 506 00:38:09,896 --> 00:38:12,102 Get up! Get up! Get up! 507 00:38:13,566 --> 00:38:15,190 - Oh, you're in here. - Hi, Mom. 508 00:38:15,401 --> 00:38:19,233 - How are you today? - Zachary, what did you do this time? 509 00:38:20,197 --> 00:38:24,491 Nothing at all, Mom. I'm just helping Victor with his homework. 510 00:38:24,701 --> 00:38:27,536 You know, WWII and stuff. Great war. 511 00:38:28,914 --> 00:38:30,705 Is something wrong, Victor? 512 00:38:30,915 --> 00:38:32,196 You look a little worried. 513 00:38:32,417 --> 00:38:36,580 Ah, no, no, no, I just, have a stomach ache. 514 00:38:36,796 --> 00:38:38,705 Does it hurt bad? Do you want some yogurt? 515 00:38:38,923 --> 00:38:41,544 - Oh, I'm alright. It'll pass. - We ate three packs of cream puffs. 516 00:38:41,759 --> 00:38:43,383 Well, no wonder! 517 00:38:43,594 --> 00:38:46,464 You have to eat something more substantial. 518 00:38:46,680 --> 00:38:50,049 That's what I kept telling Vic here, but he kept insisting. 519 00:38:50,267 --> 00:38:54,050 I love cream puffs. What time is it? 520 00:38:54,270 --> 00:38:57,971 Oh, my God, it's already 5.30. 521 00:38:58,191 --> 00:39:01,891 I'm gonna start dinner shortly. You boys better be able to eat something. 522 00:39:02,111 --> 00:39:03,985 We will. 523 00:39:05,823 --> 00:39:11,113 And it was freezing cold in Stalingrad. 524 00:39:11,328 --> 00:39:13,783 The soldiers had bare feet... 525 00:39:13,997 --> 00:39:17,200 as they walked... where? 526 00:39:17,417 --> 00:39:19,623 That's question number 8. 527 00:39:20,628 --> 00:39:23,499 It'll make an awesome scene when he gives it to her. 528 00:39:23,714 --> 00:39:25,956 Word. Hopefully she'll punch him or something. 529 00:39:27,093 --> 00:39:28,291 Hey! That's mine! 530 00:39:28,511 --> 00:39:30,669 No one get's away with cheating in my class! 531 00:39:30,888 --> 00:39:32,880 You can collect it later at the principal's office. 532 00:39:33,098 --> 00:39:35,636 Out! Both of you! Auf wiedersehen! 533 00:39:35,851 --> 00:39:40,845 - Come on Zack, we're out. - Yeah, this place is dead anyway. 534 00:39:42,649 --> 00:39:44,522 Question number 9! 535 00:39:50,281 --> 00:39:51,111 Ah. 536 00:39:52,199 --> 00:39:53,574 Are you feeling alright, Victor? 537 00:39:54,493 --> 00:39:58,360 Yeah, Mom. I'm just going to a birthday party. 538 00:39:58,664 --> 00:40:00,407 At a girl's house. 539 00:40:00,624 --> 00:40:02,367 At a girl's house? 540 00:40:02,584 --> 00:40:06,416 A girl named Anya. 541 00:40:07,964 --> 00:40:10,087 Oh, my, my, what did you get her? 542 00:40:10,299 --> 00:40:12,173 Uh. It, it, it's a, it's a book. 543 00:40:12,385 --> 00:40:16,548 - Oh, it's a big book, isn't it? - Yeah, she reads a bunch. 544 00:40:16,764 --> 00:40:19,599 Anya. Do you take classes together? 545 00:40:20,851 --> 00:40:23,805 No, uh, she's... she's a Senior. 546 00:40:24,688 --> 00:40:26,680 I don't really like the girls my own age. 547 00:40:27,899 --> 00:40:30,853 Wow! That's amazing! 548 00:40:34,614 --> 00:40:35,942 Let me. 549 00:40:41,662 --> 00:40:44,413 You should invite her over for dinner, so Dad and I could meet her. 550 00:40:44,623 --> 00:40:49,450 Uh, I don't think so. We're just friends, ya know... 551 00:40:50,420 --> 00:40:53,255 Is that why you're ironing your underpants? 552 00:40:55,717 --> 00:40:59,381 Sorry. So, what does this Anya look like? 553 00:40:59,595 --> 00:41:03,972 She's... she's got dark hair and, 554 00:41:04,183 --> 00:41:07,598 she's so... 555 00:41:09,062 --> 00:41:10,604 She needs to be seen. 556 00:41:12,983 --> 00:41:15,556 Well, there you go. 557 00:41:16,528 --> 00:41:17,607 The socks... 558 00:41:18,654 --> 00:41:20,730 I'll let you do yourself. 559 00:41:20,948 --> 00:41:22,063 Who is getting married? 560 00:41:22,283 --> 00:41:26,530 He's going to a birthday party. For a girl... 561 00:41:26,745 --> 00:41:28,156 who's a Senior! 562 00:41:28,372 --> 00:41:30,115 So he's not gay, huh? 563 00:41:31,583 --> 00:41:33,872 - I, I got it. - Well, let me just get the other. 564 00:41:34,085 --> 00:41:37,335 No, I'm gonna leave them down. Mom! 565 00:41:57,023 --> 00:41:59,894 Please! Come on! 566 00:42:01,820 --> 00:42:03,563 Please, stop! 567 00:42:08,117 --> 00:42:09,777 So Victor, how does it feel 568 00:42:09,994 --> 00:42:12,449 visiting the girl you've had wet dreams about on her birthday? 569 00:42:13,956 --> 00:42:14,905 Are you nervous? 570 00:42:15,124 --> 00:42:17,793 Brian Henry! Go back in the living room. 571 00:42:18,001 --> 00:42:19,994 We're not buying anything today. 572 00:42:20,212 --> 00:42:23,995 Mom! This is Victor. Anya's new boy toy. 573 00:42:26,634 --> 00:42:28,093 Really? 574 00:42:28,302 --> 00:42:31,220 Hi, Mrs. Benton. Victor Knudsen. Very nice to meet you. 575 00:42:31,430 --> 00:42:34,182 I thought everyone was here. 576 00:42:34,391 --> 00:42:36,099 Victor? 577 00:42:38,103 --> 00:42:40,890 Happy Birthday. Thanks for inviting me. 578 00:42:41,815 --> 00:42:44,057 You're welcome. 579 00:42:46,444 --> 00:42:49,647 What a lovely present you brought for my daughter, Victor. 580 00:42:51,074 --> 00:42:52,865 Thanks. 581 00:42:53,075 --> 00:42:57,203 So, Anya, are you as excited as me to see what's inside that thing? 582 00:43:13,886 --> 00:43:15,760 What the hell is nerd boy doing here? 583 00:43:18,641 --> 00:43:21,132 Why doesn't she just kick him out? He clearly doesn't belong. 584 00:43:21,352 --> 00:43:24,685 She can't kick him out. He dressed up and brought a present and all. 585 00:43:26,315 --> 00:43:28,984 Well, come on already, Anya, open it. 586 00:43:33,696 --> 00:43:36,567 Slower, Sis. With feeling. 587 00:43:49,169 --> 00:43:53,083 Oh, look at that, there's something moving in there. 588 00:43:53,298 --> 00:43:54,496 It's a.... 589 00:44:00,430 --> 00:44:03,383 Oh, wow! It's an Eximius Colosus Aranea!! 590 00:44:05,101 --> 00:44:06,511 Oh, my God! 591 00:44:06,727 --> 00:44:09,300 Oh, Victor, that big, hairy fella must have cost you a fortune, huh? 592 00:44:09,521 --> 00:44:11,063 His name's Hugo. 593 00:44:11,273 --> 00:44:14,973 - Does it attack humans? - Only when it feels threatened. 594 00:44:19,239 --> 00:44:22,156 But, it was to keep your lizard company. 595 00:44:22,367 --> 00:44:24,193 I don't own any lizards, Victor. 596 00:44:24,410 --> 00:44:25,406 You don't? 597 00:44:30,291 --> 00:44:33,375 No, no, no, just keep breathing. It's okay, now he's just, 598 00:44:33,585 --> 00:44:36,705 you know, just keep breathing. Take a deep breath. 599 00:44:36,922 --> 00:44:38,665 It's in the box, it's not gonna harm anyone. 600 00:44:38,882 --> 00:44:40,341 It's not funny. 601 00:44:40,800 --> 00:44:45,047 Let me get you a piece of cake to calm your nerves. 602 00:44:47,015 --> 00:44:48,425 Honey, it's okay. 603 00:44:49,851 --> 00:44:51,131 Thank you. 604 00:44:51,352 --> 00:44:53,261 Ooooohhh! 605 00:45:07,659 --> 00:45:09,532 Anya, I'm so sorry about all this. 606 00:45:09,744 --> 00:45:11,072 I'm sure you didn't intend 607 00:45:11,287 --> 00:45:14,323 on releasing a poisonous creature in my house on purpose. 608 00:45:15,833 --> 00:45:18,584 Thanks for hiding me in your bedroom. 609 00:45:18,794 --> 00:45:21,367 Your entire family probably wants to kill me, huh? 610 00:45:21,588 --> 00:45:24,957 For some reason my dad finds you really hilarious. 611 00:45:25,842 --> 00:45:27,634 He seems like a great guy. 612 00:45:28,887 --> 00:45:33,465 I thought it was very sweet of you to buy me such a lovely present. 613 00:45:33,683 --> 00:45:34,845 I'm glad you liked it. 614 00:45:35,059 --> 00:45:37,846 What on earth made you buy me a tarantula? 615 00:45:39,146 --> 00:45:40,771 Brian said you always wanted one! 616 00:45:42,191 --> 00:45:45,310 That little turd had something to do with this. 617 00:45:53,368 --> 00:45:55,325 You did that on purpose, didn't you? 618 00:45:56,204 --> 00:45:58,030 Not at all. 619 00:46:00,041 --> 00:46:03,955 - Never give up, huh? - I guess not. 620 00:46:06,964 --> 00:46:10,498 Well, I guess I better kiss you, then. 621 00:46:15,472 --> 00:46:18,342 Well, we still can't find Hugo. But the good news is, 622 00:46:18,558 --> 00:46:20,100 Aunt Lizzy didn't get bit after all. 623 00:46:20,309 --> 00:46:23,559 It was just her recent Botox that made her face go numb. 624 00:46:23,771 --> 00:46:25,680 I hope I didn't ruin your couch. 625 00:46:26,982 --> 00:46:28,607 Hum. 22 grand. 626 00:46:28,817 --> 00:46:31,189 22,000 dollars?! 627 00:46:31,403 --> 00:46:33,028 No, I'm just messing with you, kid. 628 00:46:35,907 --> 00:46:37,188 You need a ride home? 629 00:46:37,409 --> 00:46:40,279 Yeah. Thanks. 630 00:46:44,207 --> 00:46:45,950 Sorry again I ruined your birthday. 631 00:46:59,429 --> 00:47:03,094 It's a, it's a really great motor. You can't wear the crankshaft out. 632 00:47:03,308 --> 00:47:05,977 The pistons are cast steel, and the brakes... 633 00:47:06,185 --> 00:47:08,012 work every other Tuesday. 634 00:47:09,188 --> 00:47:12,806 Since I don't have no Senior babe, I have to drill what I got. 635 00:47:14,026 --> 00:47:15,769 Even if it was just a mercy kiss, 636 00:47:15,986 --> 00:47:18,821 I think I'll see if she wants to go to a movie sometime. 637 00:47:19,031 --> 00:47:20,822 Woa, woa, woa, woa, woa. 638 00:47:21,033 --> 00:47:23,358 No, no. 639 00:47:23,577 --> 00:47:27,076 You can't take a girl you really like to the movies on a first date. 640 00:47:27,288 --> 00:47:30,871 You have to do something that will really impress her. 641 00:47:31,084 --> 00:47:33,574 Yeah. Something to get her panties wet. 642 00:47:35,337 --> 00:47:39,714 Imagine you and her alone together... 643 00:47:41,969 --> 00:47:43,926 Close those eyes. 644 00:47:44,137 --> 00:47:48,598 Somewhere romantic. Somewhere that' II make her heart go 645 00:47:48,808 --> 00:47:53,351 "Victor, Victor, Victor." 646 00:47:54,105 --> 00:47:56,263 Where would you be? 647 00:47:58,526 --> 00:48:01,063 I got it! I'll take her to Pyramid Lake and, 648 00:48:01,278 --> 00:48:03,105 and get some bananas, organic ones. 649 00:48:03,322 --> 00:48:05,943 Girls like that. And rent a row boat. 650 00:48:06,158 --> 00:48:07,616 Thanks boys, wish me luck! 651 00:48:10,870 --> 00:48:14,820 Bananas? I think we got a situation. 652 00:48:16,626 --> 00:48:18,702 I'm more worried about the row boat. 653 00:48:18,920 --> 00:48:21,161 He doesn't really have the arms for it, you know? 654 00:48:21,380 --> 00:48:23,622 - Truth. - Got the legs, though. 655 00:48:41,190 --> 00:48:42,981 Hey Victor. What's up? 656 00:48:45,319 --> 00:48:48,486 I uh... wanted to make it up to you. 657 00:48:49,448 --> 00:48:51,524 For the mess I made. 658 00:48:53,952 --> 00:48:55,991 Give me five minutes. 659 00:49:07,048 --> 00:49:12,386 So, where's this apology at? 660 00:49:16,848 --> 00:49:17,963 Thanks. 661 00:49:18,183 --> 00:49:23,260 I was also hoping you'd come with me somewhere? 662 00:49:23,480 --> 00:49:25,187 For lunch. 663 00:49:25,648 --> 00:49:28,353 Nowhere near poisonous creatures, I promise. 664 00:49:30,361 --> 00:49:33,564 - Okay. - Okay. 665 00:49:43,248 --> 00:49:45,703 Sorry, it's my dad's. 666 00:49:45,917 --> 00:49:48,242 - No Lotus. - It has character. 667 00:49:50,004 --> 00:49:51,747 Anya, what the hell you doing, baby? 668 00:49:52,673 --> 00:49:54,251 Shit. 669 00:49:54,467 --> 00:49:57,882 Victor's taking me out to apologize for my birthday party. 670 00:49:58,095 --> 00:50:01,594 But, I was planning to take you to the Four Seasons today. 671 00:50:01,807 --> 00:50:03,764 I booked a room... ahhh, a table. 672 00:50:04,518 --> 00:50:05,513 Sorry. 673 00:50:05,727 --> 00:50:10,139 Anya, come on, it's Victor, the hiccup Freshman, for Christ sake. 674 00:50:11,399 --> 00:50:14,353 Are you seriously choosing to go out with some 15 year old loser 675 00:50:14,569 --> 00:50:17,818 who's so not in your league, over moi? 676 00:50:18,030 --> 00:50:21,031 You can be such a jackass, you know that? 677 00:50:23,660 --> 00:50:25,819 - Let's go, Victor. - Yeah. 678 00:50:32,877 --> 00:50:36,412 If I hadn't just had a manicure you'd be dead meat, hiccup boy! 679 00:50:36,631 --> 00:50:40,082 Fine. I hope you two are very happy together, in your... 680 00:50:40,301 --> 00:50:44,429 1915 get-out-and-push piece of shit wheels. 681 00:50:45,556 --> 00:50:47,513 Have fun at Dave and Buster's. 682 00:50:52,687 --> 00:50:56,519 - So, that went well. - Yeah, I guess that was that. 683 00:51:08,160 --> 00:51:09,868 I, I... 684 00:51:15,500 --> 00:51:17,540 Try it now. 685 00:51:23,508 --> 00:51:24,752 Wow! 686 00:51:34,393 --> 00:51:37,393 Um. The Queen Nefertiti Rose. 687 00:51:38,146 --> 00:51:41,266 Named after the Roman Queen. 688 00:51:43,735 --> 00:51:47,566 Your pink-white, and your white, and your white pink... 689 00:51:49,448 --> 00:51:52,734 - So, where are you taking me? - You'll see. 690 00:52:05,630 --> 00:52:10,292 - Hi, we'd like to ah.... - Mr. Victor Knudsen, I presume? 691 00:52:10,510 --> 00:52:13,594 - Yeah... - Everything is ready, sir. 692 00:52:13,804 --> 00:52:16,888 - Just like you requested. - Requested? 693 00:52:18,308 --> 00:52:23,551 Oh, Victor, it's absolutely amazing! How romantic! 694 00:52:25,357 --> 00:52:28,939 - Yeah, well... - I wanna row! 695 00:52:29,903 --> 00:52:32,939 I'm glad everything is to the young lady's liking. 696 00:52:37,868 --> 00:52:41,652 The rest is in your hands. 697 00:52:50,255 --> 00:52:54,584 Come on, let's follow 'em. Maybe we'll get to see some live porn. 698 00:52:54,801 --> 00:53:00,043 No man, he's on his own now. It's so romantic. 699 00:53:00,389 --> 00:53:03,722 Oh, it's so romantic, boo-boo. 700 00:53:03,934 --> 00:53:06,259 You know what's, what's romantic here? 701 00:53:06,478 --> 00:53:08,886 I like cheese fries. I want some cheese fries. 702 00:53:09,106 --> 00:53:10,054 Let's get some cheese fries. 703 00:53:10,273 --> 00:53:13,274 Really? Cheese fries are fat. 704 00:53:23,411 --> 00:53:26,328 My family and I used to come here when I was a kid. 705 00:53:27,331 --> 00:53:31,624 It's gorgeous. I never knew this place existed. 706 00:54:07,618 --> 00:54:10,702 I'm sorry for what Peter said earlier. 707 00:54:11,288 --> 00:54:14,538 It's okay. He's right. It's a piece of shit car. 708 00:54:15,375 --> 00:54:18,958 No, I mean; you're not a loser. 709 00:54:20,213 --> 00:54:22,621 And I'm not out of your league. 710 00:54:25,009 --> 00:54:25,958 You're not? 711 00:54:45,028 --> 00:54:47,317 I just wanted to make sure that's clear. 712 00:54:59,667 --> 00:55:01,374 Victor? 713 00:55:02,127 --> 00:55:04,535 Have you ever done it? 714 00:55:04,755 --> 00:55:06,035 Done what? 715 00:55:07,465 --> 00:55:10,502 You know..."it"? 716 00:55:12,053 --> 00:55:16,347 Oh, oh, it! Yeah, sure, of course. 717 00:55:16,557 --> 00:55:19,130 All the time. Who hasn't? 718 00:55:25,190 --> 00:55:26,388 No. 719 00:55:30,320 --> 00:55:33,985 Do you.... maybe want to? 720 00:55:37,118 --> 00:55:38,529 With me? 721 00:55:39,453 --> 00:55:40,948 Here? 722 00:55:41,163 --> 00:55:45,492 No, silly. My parents play cards on Wednesdays. 723 00:55:46,502 --> 00:55:48,293 Oh, I know. 724 00:55:48,504 --> 00:55:50,295 You do? 725 00:55:51,965 --> 00:55:54,004 You could come by around 8. 726 00:55:55,218 --> 00:55:58,088 Eight? I can do 8, yeah! 727 00:55:59,013 --> 00:56:03,342 And bring something with you. If you know what I mean. 728 00:56:05,686 --> 00:56:08,473 Right. Right. Something. 729 00:56:08,689 --> 00:56:10,563 Sure. 730 00:56:12,234 --> 00:56:15,021 I'm the king of the world!! 731 00:56:53,272 --> 00:56:56,688 Good day, young man, haven't seen you before. How may I help you? 732 00:57:04,991 --> 00:57:07,233 My Miniature Pony? 733 00:57:09,412 --> 00:57:13,196 Yeah, it's for my little br... sister! 734 00:57:13,624 --> 00:57:15,664 Anything else I can get for you? 735 00:57:15,876 --> 00:57:18,747 Yeah, I, I really need some cond... 736 00:57:18,963 --> 00:57:20,872 Some, some cond... 737 00:57:21,423 --> 00:57:24,958 Some condensed milk. 738 00:57:25,177 --> 00:57:30,384 Condensed milk? Alright. 739 00:57:34,227 --> 00:57:38,354 - Is that all? - No, no, I, I, I need some cond... 740 00:57:39,190 --> 00:57:42,060 - Some cond.... - Cond? 741 00:57:44,862 --> 00:57:48,230 Condoms... 742 00:57:51,368 --> 00:57:54,701 - I, I mean some rubb.... - Rub what? 743 00:57:55,580 --> 00:58:00,621 Some ru... bbing alcohol. Rubbing alcohol. 744 00:58:01,377 --> 00:58:05,326 Hm hum. Yep, that, that's the stuff. 745 00:58:09,259 --> 00:58:12,213 And I really need some cond... 746 00:58:13,555 --> 00:58:18,263 Some co... Ca, Ca, Castillo's, Cas, Castello's. 747 00:58:18,476 --> 00:58:19,306 Those. 748 00:58:19,519 --> 00:58:20,717 How old are you? 749 00:58:20,937 --> 00:58:22,929 Oh, no, I wouldn't touch those things. 750 00:58:23,147 --> 00:58:26,397 - They're for my dad. - Ahh, someone's having a party. 751 00:58:34,157 --> 00:58:36,150 Yo, Victor. Whatcha doing? 752 00:58:41,497 --> 00:58:43,739 Didn't look like a Havana. 753 00:58:50,172 --> 00:58:52,129 You wanna make 5 bucks? 754 00:58:52,341 --> 00:58:55,045 Not really, but I wouldn't mind making 20. 755 00:58:57,596 --> 00:58:59,635 And what may I get for you today, son? 756 00:58:59,848 --> 00:59:01,887 I'd like to buy some jimmy hats. 757 00:59:03,143 --> 00:59:05,930 I'm sorry I'm not familiar with the name. What may they be? 758 00:59:06,145 --> 00:59:10,439 Dingers, johnnies, gloves. 759 00:59:10,650 --> 00:59:13,650 The thing you need when you're banging a chick, of course. 760 00:59:13,861 --> 00:59:14,857 Oh, my! 761 00:59:15,070 --> 00:59:18,653 I suppose you mean condoms, my young fellow? 762 00:59:18,865 --> 00:59:22,068 Duh, what are you deaf? Rubbers with colors. 763 00:59:22,285 --> 00:59:26,034 And you don't suppose you're a bit too young for that sort of thing? 764 00:59:26,247 --> 00:59:29,450 I don't think so mister, the fat one's getting hairy already. 765 00:59:31,210 --> 00:59:32,870 I'm sorry, are you feeling alright, ma'am? 766 00:59:33,087 --> 00:59:36,835 I just need to lean up against something. 767 00:59:37,049 --> 00:59:39,421 Or should I rather buy the ribbed ones? 768 00:59:39,635 --> 00:59:40,749 They're supposed to prolong the pleasure. 769 00:59:40,969 --> 00:59:44,836 Listen, kid. We only have normal kinds, no colors, knobs or flavors! 770 00:59:45,056 --> 00:59:48,508 Alright, I'll make do with the smooth ones. A carton of Trojans. 771 00:59:48,727 --> 00:59:51,015 A carton? Are you completely out of your mind, kid? 772 00:59:51,229 --> 00:59:52,343 There's 200 in a carton!! 773 00:59:52,563 --> 00:59:56,146 Yeah, I'm spending the entire weekend with her, 774 00:59:56,359 --> 00:59:59,110 and she's a lush one so... 775 00:59:59,320 --> 01:00:01,028 Alrighty then, give me two. 776 01:00:01,238 --> 01:00:04,192 - Two cartons? - No, just two. 777 01:00:04,408 --> 01:00:06,281 I can always flip them over and reuse. 778 01:00:07,452 --> 01:00:10,572 - Four-fifty. - Keep the change. 779 01:00:13,124 --> 01:00:15,330 You wouldn't happen to have a dressing room out back, 780 01:00:15,543 --> 01:00:17,085 just so I can try them on for size? 781 01:00:17,295 --> 01:00:18,872 Get out! 782 01:00:22,800 --> 01:00:25,255 I can't believe my brother's actually gonna get some. 783 01:00:25,469 --> 01:00:27,296 It'll make great footage. 784 01:00:27,513 --> 01:00:31,130 It's gotta be possible to paint the rain coats with luminous paint. 785 01:00:31,349 --> 01:00:33,508 So we can see the action in details. 786 01:00:33,727 --> 01:00:37,510 Not necessary, my man, this baby's got night vision! 787 01:00:37,730 --> 01:00:42,725 Nice. Not sure how well the film will sell with a "happy ending" though. 788 01:00:42,944 --> 01:00:46,608 Yeah. Right now Victor's the only one who'll get one. 789 01:00:46,822 --> 01:00:50,107 - We need more drama. - Perhaps we can think of something. 790 01:00:50,909 --> 01:00:54,112 Would you mind sharing what you just said with the class? 791 01:00:54,329 --> 01:00:56,618 Yeah, sure thing Mrs. T. 792 01:00:56,831 --> 01:00:59,583 It was about my gang bang with three playmates last weekend. 793 01:00:59,792 --> 01:01:02,627 Alright! That's quite enough sharing, Zack! 794 01:01:02,837 --> 01:01:05,754 Hey, you wanted to know. I also showed the chicks my trapeze stunt. 795 01:01:05,965 --> 01:01:08,456 Principal's office! Both of you! Now! 796 01:01:08,676 --> 01:01:12,673 Yeah, we gotta bounce anyway. Our bitches are waiting. 797 01:01:14,223 --> 01:01:16,298 We out. 798 01:01:30,321 --> 01:01:33,357 Hello baby!! Your man is back! 799 01:01:36,201 --> 01:01:37,779 What did you smoke today? 800 01:01:37,995 --> 01:01:41,114 Oh, good evening Mr. Benton, Sir. 801 01:01:41,331 --> 01:01:43,656 Call me Roger, Spider man. 802 01:01:44,793 --> 01:01:47,829 Did you bring us any other dangerous animals this time? 803 01:01:48,046 --> 01:01:49,623 Not tonight, Mr. Benton. 804 01:01:49,839 --> 01:01:51,214 Oooh! 805 01:01:51,424 --> 01:01:52,254 Roger. 806 01:01:52,466 --> 01:01:57,211 Too bad. Still no Hugo. 807 01:01:59,264 --> 01:02:02,016 Come on, I'll take you up to Anya's room. 808 01:02:02,934 --> 01:02:05,508 You two are working on a science project for school tonight? 809 01:02:05,729 --> 01:02:09,097 Yeah. Yeah. For Science class. 810 01:02:09,315 --> 01:02:11,272 Okay. 811 01:02:27,457 --> 01:02:28,786 Hi! 812 01:02:29,459 --> 01:02:31,368 Hey. 813 01:02:40,886 --> 01:02:43,045 I'm almost done. 814 01:03:05,993 --> 01:03:08,484 And...I'm done. 815 01:03:12,249 --> 01:03:17,456 So, aren't your parents gonna play cards tonight? 816 01:03:17,670 --> 01:03:19,081 I don't think so. 817 01:03:21,716 --> 01:03:25,250 They actually asked if we could watch Brian tonight. 818 01:03:25,469 --> 01:03:26,928 Hope that's okay with you. 819 01:03:28,764 --> 01:03:31,967 Sure. Sure, yeah, that's, that's fine. 820 01:03:33,685 --> 01:03:36,639 Gotcha! They leave in 10 minutes! 821 01:03:38,398 --> 01:03:40,272 That is not even funny. 822 01:03:40,483 --> 01:03:42,143 - No. - Okay. 823 01:03:44,112 --> 01:03:45,606 Stop! 824 01:03:46,989 --> 01:03:48,365 Hey, there. 825 01:03:48,574 --> 01:03:50,068 Just wanted to let you two know that we're leaving. 826 01:03:50,284 --> 01:03:52,241 - Okay, see you. - Bye. 827 01:03:52,453 --> 01:03:56,284 Get some work done. We'll be back shortly. 828 01:03:57,541 --> 01:03:59,664 Have fun! Live free. 829 01:04:07,008 --> 01:04:07,754 So? 830 01:04:09,552 --> 01:04:10,715 So... 831 01:04:19,686 --> 01:04:22,853 You want a glass of milk? To break the ice? 832 01:04:25,942 --> 01:04:27,520 Only if it's whole milk. 833 01:05:00,141 --> 01:05:03,141 Now that we've got that taken care of.... 834 01:05:03,811 --> 01:05:05,353 do you wanna go back to my room? 835 01:05:16,489 --> 01:05:18,612 Can you turn off the lights? 836 01:06:34,979 --> 01:06:37,896 Maybe it's a little too dark. 837 01:06:38,107 --> 01:06:40,348 No, it isn't, It's okay. 838 01:06:51,702 --> 01:06:53,529 Victor, what are you doing? 839 01:06:54,413 --> 01:06:58,078 - I'm touching you. - No, no, no, you're not! 840 01:07:04,715 --> 01:07:09,625 - I thought it felt a little funny. - Thanks for the compliment. 841 01:07:15,933 --> 01:07:19,717 Are you ready to get completely naked? 842 01:07:52,968 --> 01:07:56,917 Victor, did you... bring something? 843 01:07:57,305 --> 01:07:58,680 Of course. 844 01:08:03,519 --> 01:08:04,799 One second. 845 01:08:07,898 --> 01:08:09,309 Got it. 846 01:08:14,571 --> 01:08:15,318 One second. 847 01:08:20,160 --> 01:08:23,659 I can't get this piece of crap open. Come... 848 01:08:27,917 --> 01:08:29,577 Alright. 849 01:08:42,931 --> 01:08:44,425 Is it on? 850 01:08:44,933 --> 01:08:48,551 - Yeah, on my fingers. - Relax. 851 01:08:48,769 --> 01:08:51,058 It's my first time too, remember? 852 01:08:51,272 --> 01:08:54,937 Yeah.... 853 01:08:55,317 --> 01:08:58,900 It was a lot easier putting it on Ernie's fingers in Sex-Ed. 854 01:08:59,780 --> 01:09:01,938 How in the... hell? 855 01:09:06,536 --> 01:09:07,911 I have another one! 856 01:09:08,121 --> 01:09:09,152 Okay. 857 01:09:20,049 --> 01:09:22,883 Aren't we lucky, it has a manual. 858 01:09:23,802 --> 01:09:29,092 "Roll slowly over erect penis". 859 01:09:30,058 --> 01:09:31,801 How poetic. 860 01:09:32,143 --> 01:09:33,518 Let me try. 861 01:09:40,401 --> 01:09:44,529 "Erect penis". That certainly isn't a problem. 862 01:09:46,531 --> 01:09:49,568 Abracadabra. 863 01:09:51,661 --> 01:09:53,321 Voilā! 864 01:10:01,253 --> 01:10:03,827 - My parents! Already? - What? 865 01:10:09,845 --> 01:10:11,125 Victor, that's my dress! 866 01:10:18,019 --> 01:10:20,640 The bed, the bed. Help me, help me make the bed. 867 01:10:22,106 --> 01:10:26,020 I just don't think it's necessary! She is 18 now, you know. 868 01:10:27,987 --> 01:10:30,477 Hey kids. We're back. 869 01:10:31,198 --> 01:10:32,194 - Hello. - Hey. 870 01:10:32,532 --> 01:10:35,023 So, have you two been, uh, behaving yourselves? 871 01:10:35,243 --> 01:10:36,987 What do you think, Dad? 872 01:10:37,203 --> 01:10:40,204 Well, your father seems to believe that you are a responsible adult. 873 01:10:41,624 --> 01:10:44,080 Victor, my man, did you hit all the angles? 874 01:10:45,336 --> 01:10:47,245 Okay, come on, Brian, time for bed. 875 01:10:47,463 --> 01:10:53,465 Hey. That's a nice science project there, guys. What is it? 876 01:10:54,553 --> 01:10:59,629 - It's a... - Lexington Hussil. 877 01:10:59,849 --> 01:11:01,759 Hussil. A Lexington Hussil. 878 01:11:02,477 --> 01:11:04,516 Oh, I see. 879 01:11:04,854 --> 01:11:08,768 Victor, could I have a little chat with you for a minute? 880 01:11:08,983 --> 01:11:10,062 In the kitchen. 881 01:11:10,818 --> 01:11:13,024 For Christ sakes, Dad, does it have to be right now? 882 01:11:14,571 --> 01:11:18,023 It's, it's fine. It's, it's fine. 883 01:11:18,492 --> 01:11:19,654 Victor! 884 01:11:19,868 --> 01:11:23,284 - Where did the other one go? - I didn't have a chance to take it off! 885 01:11:27,417 --> 01:11:27,997 Cheers. 886 01:11:30,670 --> 01:11:34,963 One has to be careful not to sit down on Hugo. 887 01:11:35,633 --> 01:11:38,586 Still haven't found that little bugger. 888 01:11:41,888 --> 01:11:46,016 You know, Victor, it's become clear to me that 889 01:11:46,226 --> 01:11:50,804 my daughter likes you very much and you like her, and 890 01:11:51,230 --> 01:11:55,275 Constance and I think that you're just ah, well, you know... 891 01:11:56,777 --> 01:11:59,861 In fact, you remind me very much of myself when I was your age. 892 01:12:00,072 --> 01:12:02,361 Always going after the hot, older gal. 893 01:12:03,659 --> 01:12:08,616 So, I hope that the two of you, you know, could be together for 894 01:12:08,830 --> 01:12:12,875 - at least some time. - So do I, sir. 895 01:12:13,376 --> 01:12:16,709 Yeah. So, I understand that the two of you wanna have sex with each other. 896 01:12:20,591 --> 01:12:22,169 No. Hey, relax, 897 01:12:22,384 --> 01:12:24,756 It's, you know it's completely natural. Completely natural. 898 01:12:24,970 --> 01:12:29,513 At your ages, you know. Even at my age, I like to have it occasionally. 899 01:12:29,725 --> 01:12:32,050 Mostly with my wife. 900 01:12:35,105 --> 01:12:38,058 I'm in the cut-throat world of advertising, alright? 901 01:12:38,274 --> 01:12:39,649 It's kill or be killed. 902 01:12:39,859 --> 01:12:43,275 We're working on a big campaign now, spending millions of dollars in fact, 903 01:12:43,487 --> 01:12:47,271 to get young people to understand that protection can be "hip". 904 01:12:47,491 --> 01:12:50,243 And that it's important for them to have a condom on them 905 01:12:50,452 --> 01:12:52,610 every time they leave their home. 906 01:12:52,829 --> 01:12:55,320 Well, I don't mean on them, of course. 907 01:12:55,540 --> 01:12:57,497 - No. - But with them. 908 01:12:58,334 --> 01:13:00,244 You know, in their wallet, or their pocket... 909 01:13:00,461 --> 01:13:04,790 It doesn't matter where, as long as they have the darn thing. 910 01:13:08,010 --> 01:13:10,133 So, can I ask you a personal question? 911 01:13:13,432 --> 01:13:15,092 Of course. Yeah. 912 01:13:15,309 --> 01:13:18,760 How often do you have a rubber on you? 913 01:13:21,648 --> 01:13:25,645 Well I, I, I just started having one.... 914 01:13:25,860 --> 01:13:28,149 on me, recently. 915 01:13:29,238 --> 01:13:32,441 You know, everyone's so liberated now that it's important to have one... 916 01:13:32,658 --> 01:13:34,532 on you, with you. 917 01:13:35,619 --> 01:13:38,703 Oh, I'm glad to hear that, Victor. You know, you're adults now, 918 01:13:38,914 --> 01:13:41,239 and that comes with some responsibilities. 919 01:13:41,458 --> 01:13:42,656 Of course. 920 01:13:43,626 --> 01:13:46,580 I'm glad you have such a good head for these things. 921 01:13:50,842 --> 01:13:55,171 - Want another drink for the road? - Yes, sir. 922 01:14:14,530 --> 01:14:17,566 Well, I'm glad we had this talk son. 923 01:14:21,495 --> 01:14:23,238 Me too, sir. 924 01:14:24,831 --> 01:14:25,745 Ow, alright. 925 01:14:27,459 --> 01:14:29,747 - That's cool. - Yeah. 926 01:14:33,464 --> 01:14:36,880 - Sorry about my dad. - It's all good. 927 01:14:37,677 --> 01:14:40,298 Your dad and I understand each other. 928 01:14:42,389 --> 01:14:46,469 So, do you wanna do something after school tomorrow? 929 01:14:47,519 --> 01:14:49,559 I actually have to hang out with Marisa. 930 01:14:50,480 --> 01:14:52,603 Oh. Alright. 931 01:14:52,816 --> 01:14:56,019 - You should come. - With Marissa?! 932 01:14:56,236 --> 01:14:59,770 You'll grow on her. Like a cactus. 933 01:15:02,867 --> 01:15:04,065 Good night, Victor. 934 01:15:04,285 --> 01:15:06,657 Sweet dreams. 935 01:15:23,136 --> 01:15:26,172 - Whatup? - I think I have an idea for our ending. 936 01:15:26,389 --> 01:15:27,551 Nice... 937 01:15:34,354 --> 01:15:36,892 How the hell does he forget to take it off? 938 01:15:37,107 --> 01:15:39,183 I don't know, we both completely panicked. 939 01:15:39,401 --> 01:15:42,900 You'll never get your cherry popped if you keep hanging with that kid! 940 01:15:43,112 --> 01:15:47,110 I don't know about that. It was pretty damn close. 941 01:15:47,325 --> 01:15:49,151 Besides I really like him. 942 01:15:49,368 --> 01:15:52,654 I mean he's, he's sweet, and sincere, and... 943 01:15:52,871 --> 01:15:54,247 Victor! 944 01:15:54,456 --> 01:15:58,667 Baby, Oh, I missed you so much. Why haven't you called me back? 945 01:15:58,877 --> 01:16:00,336 Are you still dating that old hag? 946 01:16:05,842 --> 01:16:07,669 Victor, what the hell are you doing?! 947 01:16:08,970 --> 01:16:11,840 I... I don't, I don't know! Who are you? 948 01:16:12,056 --> 01:16:15,472 Good one. I'll see you tomorrow, stud. 949 01:16:16,894 --> 01:16:19,182 Anya, I don't know what's going on. 950 01:16:19,396 --> 01:16:21,305 Well, I do! What, you just wanted to show off 951 01:16:21,523 --> 01:16:23,562 in front of your stupid Freshmen friends, didn't you? 952 01:16:23,775 --> 01:16:26,776 - No, I, I would never... - Was I some sort of bet or something? 953 01:16:26,986 --> 01:16:27,484 Not at all! 954 01:16:27,695 --> 01:16:30,269 Since you didn't "get any" last night, you're done with me, is that it? 955 01:16:30,490 --> 01:16:33,360 - Would you listen to me? - Don't touch me! 956 01:16:37,037 --> 01:16:37,702 Anya! 957 01:16:37,913 --> 01:16:40,784 - Leave me alone! - You, bastard! 958 01:16:47,255 --> 01:16:49,960 But... I love you. 959 01:17:00,476 --> 01:17:03,927 - Oh, that looks great! - Well, they travel, you know. 960 01:17:04,146 --> 01:17:07,100 Look. He's a little fat, but you know, for what this has... 961 01:17:09,067 --> 01:17:10,442 Victor, are you alright? 962 01:17:10,652 --> 01:17:14,317 - You look terrible. - Honey, what's wrong? 963 01:17:14,531 --> 01:17:18,445 - Oh, is it Anya? - Has she fallen for someone else? 964 01:17:18,659 --> 01:17:20,403 Christian!! 965 01:17:22,246 --> 01:17:25,829 It doesn't matter. It's no use. 966 01:17:33,590 --> 01:17:36,875 - Why are you so dumb? - Me? 967 01:17:37,594 --> 01:17:44,391 - No. Men! - Oh, men. Yeah, I know, honey. 968 01:17:44,600 --> 01:17:49,013 I guess we just sometimes do the wrong thing, Anya. 969 01:17:49,938 --> 01:17:53,141 I thought, I thought he loved me, Dad. 970 01:17:53,358 --> 01:17:57,403 Oh, baby, maybe he does, but he's young. 971 01:17:57,779 --> 01:18:01,278 He may not know how to express it, that's all. 972 01:18:02,450 --> 01:18:05,119 We all make mistakes, sweetheart. 973 01:18:07,538 --> 01:18:11,405 Why did your mother have to go to ballet tonight of all nights? 974 01:18:11,792 --> 01:18:15,327 Oh, baby, don't. Come on, come on, come on. 975 01:18:21,176 --> 01:18:25,125 I put extra marshmallows in it, so you could drown your sorrows. 976 01:18:26,889 --> 01:18:30,934 I guess there might be a chance I'd get lucky enough to choke and die. 977 01:18:31,727 --> 01:18:34,265 Now tell me what happened? 978 01:18:35,481 --> 01:18:39,977 Anya and I are done and my life is totally over. 979 01:18:40,235 --> 01:18:43,568 Nonsense. Of course your life isn't over. 980 01:18:43,780 --> 01:18:46,816 It is! Nothing else matters in this world. 981 01:18:47,033 --> 01:18:50,532 And she won't even listen to me. 982 01:18:52,163 --> 01:18:53,954 You just need to rest and you'll see. 983 01:18:54,165 --> 01:18:58,079 The world will look a lot brighter in the morning, I promise. 984 01:19:19,563 --> 01:19:21,472 Rise and shine, playboy. 985 01:19:21,690 --> 01:19:23,849 We got something you're gonna love. 986 01:19:24,067 --> 01:19:25,099 Go away! 987 01:19:25,319 --> 01:19:29,398 I know it isn't blueray, but still, I think you wanna see this. 988 01:19:29,614 --> 01:19:33,659 We shot a masterpiece. A film about you and Anya. 989 01:19:33,868 --> 01:19:35,825 Why don't we show you a clip, so you can see for yourself. 990 01:19:36,037 --> 01:19:38,575 If you can afford it, of course. 991 01:19:42,751 --> 01:19:45,669 - I'll fast forward a bit. - Shouldn't we call his bank first? 992 01:19:48,465 --> 01:19:51,466 Nice work bro, I personally never thought you had it in you. 993 01:19:51,676 --> 01:19:53,219 You little bastards! 994 01:19:53,428 --> 01:19:55,670 Hold your horses and watch this... 995 01:19:55,889 --> 01:19:56,837 Open it. 996 01:19:59,851 --> 01:20:01,226 Oooooh! 997 01:20:02,436 --> 01:20:05,141 You think that was bad? Watch this! 998 01:20:07,816 --> 01:20:11,684 - Okay, but why would I do it? - Lisa, you're my favorite cousin. 999 01:20:11,904 --> 01:20:14,311 And... I'll pay you 100 dollars. 1000 01:20:14,531 --> 01:20:18,943 And a night out on the town with my favorite cousin? 1001 01:20:20,703 --> 01:20:22,696 I can't believe this! 1002 01:20:22,914 --> 01:20:25,535 Wait. How did Peter even know where we would be yesterday? 1003 01:20:28,127 --> 01:20:31,293 - Why didn't you tell me right away? - We are businessmen after all. 1004 01:20:31,505 --> 01:20:34,126 And we had to finish the cut first. 1005 01:20:34,341 --> 01:20:37,176 Atrue artist never shows his work until it is finished. 1006 01:20:37,386 --> 01:20:39,259 So bro, what will you pay for it? 1007 01:20:39,471 --> 01:20:44,678 We gotta start remembering to get our blackmail money up front! 1008 01:20:45,393 --> 01:20:48,559 Dude, all I got from him was a text saying his life was finished. 1009 01:20:48,771 --> 01:20:49,850 And he spelled finished wrong. 1010 01:20:50,064 --> 01:20:52,353 Ernie, buddy, I need to borrow your Vespa! 1011 01:20:52,566 --> 01:20:54,191 - What's going on, Vic, you ok? - There's no time to explain. 1012 01:20:54,401 --> 01:20:56,061 It's a life or death situation! Please!! 1013 01:20:56,278 --> 01:20:58,271 Well, alright, alright. Take a chill pill. 1014 01:20:58,488 --> 01:21:00,695 So look, the ah, the blinkers are here and, 1015 01:21:00,907 --> 01:21:03,279 This is a visor for your face, gas. 1016 01:21:03,493 --> 01:21:05,901 Vic, most importantly, the brake. Okay, yeah, whatever. 1017 01:21:06,121 --> 01:21:07,745 But how do I start this damn thing? 1018 01:21:07,956 --> 01:21:09,995 Perhaps you're better off having your dad mail you in. 1019 01:21:10,208 --> 01:21:12,247 That way you'll get there a little faster. 1020 01:21:12,460 --> 01:21:16,243 - Ernie, start it up!! - Damn! Someone's got their period! 1021 01:21:18,424 --> 01:21:20,131 Do it. 1022 01:21:23,345 --> 01:21:26,262 Hey, Vic, be careful, the brakes aren't what they used to be! 1023 01:21:35,690 --> 01:21:40,435 Oh! Damn! 1024 01:21:43,822 --> 01:21:45,400 Ahhh! 1025 01:21:53,206 --> 01:21:56,456 On the third day of high school I, 1026 01:21:56,667 --> 01:22:00,036 Victor Knudsen, was hit by an epidemic. 1027 01:22:00,254 --> 01:22:03,171 And we're not talking chicken pox or the flu. 1028 01:22:03,382 --> 01:22:05,920 Nope, we're talking a case of total, 1029 01:22:06,135 --> 01:22:08,756 incurable "Anya- itis". 1030 01:22:09,596 --> 01:22:13,724 And I Victor Knudsen, didn't live. 1031 01:22:14,017 --> 01:22:17,599 Goodbye Anya, my love. 1032 01:22:32,034 --> 01:22:34,026 Anya? 1033 01:22:36,121 --> 01:22:37,615 Is it really you? 1034 01:22:38,498 --> 01:22:40,870 Hey, you. 1035 01:22:41,668 --> 01:22:44,205 I'm sorry I doubted you. 1036 01:22:44,420 --> 01:22:47,705 I was just so hurt when I saw that girl kissing you. 1037 01:22:48,048 --> 01:22:50,622 But, how did you know? 1038 01:22:50,843 --> 01:22:52,503 I saw the film. 1039 01:22:53,262 --> 01:22:54,542 You did? 1040 01:22:54,763 --> 01:22:57,468 Zack and Brian had an extra copy. 1041 01:22:57,682 --> 01:23:00,387 Actually, they have quite a few copies. 1042 01:23:01,811 --> 01:23:03,519 We may have to make it worth their while, 1043 01:23:03,730 --> 01:23:05,521 So we don't end up on YouTube. 1044 01:23:06,941 --> 01:23:10,440 At least some of the footage was used for something good. 1045 01:23:22,038 --> 01:23:23,367 Oh, my God! 1046 01:23:25,125 --> 01:23:29,418 This is gonna be good! 1047 01:23:34,258 --> 01:23:36,381 What the fuck?! 1048 01:23:43,183 --> 01:23:45,222 - Pervert Peter! - Pervert! 1049 01:23:45,435 --> 01:23:48,886 But, she was only my third cousin!! 1050 01:23:49,814 --> 01:23:53,230 Bye! Bye, Peter, we'll miss you. 1051 01:23:55,528 --> 01:23:57,319 I brought you a cactus. 1052 01:24:00,532 --> 01:24:03,367 Oh! Thanks. 1053 01:24:05,620 --> 01:24:08,954 Anya, if I make it... 1054 01:24:09,541 --> 01:24:12,660 Do you think I could come over again? 1055 01:24:12,877 --> 01:24:14,206 On a Wednesday? 1056 01:24:14,420 --> 01:24:18,121 Seriously. I'm pretty sure you're gonna make it. 1057 01:24:18,341 --> 01:24:20,831 And to hell with Wednesdays. My parents are gone this weekend, ... 1058 01:24:21,051 --> 01:24:23,625 so we'll have the entire house to ourselves. 1059 01:24:24,471 --> 01:24:28,006 But, what would we do all weekend long? 1060 01:24:29,226 --> 01:24:31,349 But, what about my leg? 1061 01:24:33,021 --> 01:24:36,603 Victor, I'm pretty sure you don't really need your leg to do it. 1062 01:24:40,069 --> 01:24:41,943 You really never give up, do you? 1063 01:25:16,978 --> 01:25:20,394 Oh, Victor will be so sorry he didn't pay us for that footage. 1064 01:25:20,607 --> 01:25:23,857 And my sisterfound the stash of DVDs and destroyed them all. 1065 01:25:24,068 --> 01:25:26,606 Plus all the hidden cameras in her room. 1066 01:25:29,281 --> 01:25:31,108 What's that flashing red light? 1067 01:25:31,325 --> 01:25:33,234 Don't tell me you didn't charge the battery again! 1068 01:25:33,452 --> 01:25:35,326 - It was your turn! - Shiiiit! 1069 01:25:35,537 --> 01:25:38,372 - Gimme a break! - No, no, no, no, no! Damn 1070 01:25:40,072 --> 01:25:45,272 Subtitle by Spazz