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The Celibacy Club will now
come to order.
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00:00:04,130 --> 00:00:06,131
Let's start the meeting
by reading the minutes
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from last week's meeting
where we read the minutes
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from the previous meeting,
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and Rachel spent the hour
quizzing Quinn about the nature
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of her relationship with Finn.
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Questions somebody still
refuses to answer.
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And I will continue
to refuse to answer them
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because they are none
of your business.
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All I will reveal
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is that I rejoined the Celibacy
Club to focus on me.
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Me, too.
Finn is kryptonite, which is
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why I am focusing all my energies
now on my songwriting.
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Yes, and I have to say
I am very inspired
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that both of you are showing how
celibacy is a viable option
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for teens who simply aren't
ready for intimacy,
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and for those who are older
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and are terrified
of the hose monster.
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I have a little bit
of club swag here
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that I think's really
gonna catch on. Ready?
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Chastity charms.
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We hand out the little hearts,
but not the key.
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That way, nobody can open
the lock forever.
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And ladies,
that's what keeps us safe.
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I have some questions.
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Some things that I...
I'm curious about.
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No, no, no,
why be curious?
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No, wait to have relations until
you're comfortable, right?
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Maybe till your honeymoon,
I don't know.
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Maybe even later!
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Celibacy, ladies! Dig it!
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Synced By YesCool
Corrected by icephoenix
www.addic7ed.com
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I'm just so disappointed.
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Why? I thought you wanted the
chastity charms to catch on.
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I did, until I realized they
were wearing the chastity charms
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as clip-on nipple rings.
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I know preaching
abstinence is hard,
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but I've seen
how a teen pregnancy
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can turn a kid's
world upside down.
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So keep fighting the good fight.
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And I'm happy to do whatever I
can to help make celibacy
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an option for these kids.
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I don't know, hot stuff.
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Sounds pretty lame...
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Holly!
What are you doing here?
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Subbing. The health and wellness
teacher's out
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with a mad case of the herp.
Yikers.
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- Oh, it's so good to see you!
- You, too!
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Oh, this face, this face!
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Oh. Oh, this is...
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Emma.
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- Emma, Emma Pillsbury.
- Oh, hi.
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- Nice to meet you.
- Very nice to meet you.
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- This is Holly Holliday.
- Hi, Holly.
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Have a seat here.
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- Oh, thank you.
- Wow!
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So, I'm curious why
you don't, uh, think
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that celibacy is a valid choice
for teenagers.
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Oh, I do.
I think it's a valid choice.
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I just don't think it's
that realistic.
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You know, it's like saying
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vegetarianism is an option
for lions.
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I just read in the newspaper
that ninety high school girls in
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a Memphis school district got
pregnant within three months!
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I mean, it is Tennessee,
but still.
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We've got to shake things up,
you know?
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Information is power.
Oh, and by the way, Will,
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some of your Glee kids are
the most clueless.
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Demonstration: This is a condom,
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which can help prevent
the spread of HIV,
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which can lead to AIDS,
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and it also prevents pregnancy.
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Wait, cucumbers can give you
AIDS?
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Seriously? 'Cause I just had
them on my salad!
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- We've got to educate these kids.
- I strongly disagree.
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I don't think that we
should barrage these kids
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with graphic information.
They're kids.
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I don't want to steal
their innocence.
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Are you, like,
some kind of crazy Pope lady?
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Think about the images
that these kids are exposed to.
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I mean, think about
what they have access to.
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That doesn't make it okay.
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And it shouldn't
change the message
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that they get from us,
which is this is serious stuff
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and it's not for kids
and it's not for adults!
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Okay, well,
I think that's a little naive.
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Now if you'll excuse me,
I'm off to have crazy sex,
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because I'm crazy
informed about it.
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Kidding.
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- Hasta luego.
- Hasta luego.
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Oh, man.
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Hey, Britt-britt.
So listen.
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How about you and I pop in some
Sweet Valley High this evening,
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get our cuddle on?
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Look, I'd really like to
get my sweet lady-kisses on,
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but I haven't been
feeling very sexy lately.
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I think I have a
bun in the oven.
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Please don't tell anyone.
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- Okay? Especially Artie.
- Yeah, sure.
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Your secret's safe with...
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Oh, my God. Brittany's pregnant.
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Oh, my God.
Brittany's pregnant.
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- It was only a matter of time.
- For what?
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Brittany to get pregnant.
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- Oh. Congratulations.
- For what?
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Oh, you didn't hear?
Your girlfriend's preggo.
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You're gonna be a baby daddy.
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All right, folks.
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Regionals is in a week.
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It's time to get deep
into our set list.
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Artie?
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You okay?
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My life is over.
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How am I supposed
to support a baby?
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How could you not
tell me about this?
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Wait, Brittany,
are you pregnant?
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Definitely.
I'm so sorry, Artie.
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I didn't want to upset you.
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I thought I could surprise you
when I dropped him off.
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I'm pretty sure it's a boy.
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Um...
Babies don't get dropped off.
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Wait, Brittany.
Have you been to a doctor yet?
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That's the only way to be sure.
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I don't need to go to a doctor.
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I just need
to look outside my window.
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Three days ago,
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a stork built its nest
on top of my garage.
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I'm not stupid.
It's obviously getting ready
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to bring me my baby.
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I know where babies come from.
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And that's when I realized
you were right.
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Let's go. Health and wellness
Jazzercise class!
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Do we feel our hearts
pumping yet, guys?
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You see? We have really got
to educate these kids.
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How are we going to do that
without being too graphic?
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Breathe it in.
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I want to educate them,
not titillate them.
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Didn't you ever read
Jessica Seinfeld's cookbook?
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It's all about taking vegetables
and hiding it in food
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so that you can trick kids into
eating what's good for them.
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Shake it!
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Ah! And loose.
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I'm not following.
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It's Jazzercise, Will.
It's really not that hard.
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- No.
- Grease it.
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I'm still talking
about the vegetable hiding.
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All I'm saying is
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all we have to do
is find a way to sneak in
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the sex education lesson
in a less provocative way.
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And stretch.
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Oh!
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- You guys were awesome.
- Yeah!
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How good do we feel?
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Are we sweating? Yes!
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Next week, we are going to talk
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about the power
of muscle testing.
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Yeah? Bye. Love you.
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Okay.
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Here's what I think
you should do.
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Let me come
into Glee Club this week
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and I'll show you what I mean.
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The kids will think that they're
getting ready for Regionals,
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00:06:02,488 --> 00:06:04,990
but really I'll slip
in a little lesson
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about how to avoid STDs.
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And speaking of STDs,
how is your dating life?
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Um, right now, I'm the president
of the Celibacy Club.
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Mmm.
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That's a waste
of some fine man-butt.
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Sexy.
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I really hope that's not one
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of the requirements
for Regionals,
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because with Berry
in those tights,
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- we don't stand a chance.
- No, this isn't
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about Regionals.
I'm less worried
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about that right now
and more worried
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about the fact that
it's become clear to me
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that some of you
have been lacking
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when it comes
to understanding the...
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The, uh...
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The intricacies
of adult relationships.
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Yeah, anyways...
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Along with preparing for our
Regional next week,
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I want to spend the week
educating ourselves
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about some of these...
intricacies.
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Is this the appropriate forum
for that?
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Look, whenever we had, uh,
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00:06:56,042 --> 00:06:57,793
issues in the past
that are on our minds
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or giving us problems,
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it's always helped us
to sing about it.
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So this week I have
invited a special guest.
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00:07:04,634 --> 00:07:06,718
Miss Holiday.
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Hola, clase.
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Oh, no.
It's the salad lady.
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Okay. So sex...
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It's just like hugging,
only wetter.
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Yeah, it is.
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Okay, so let's start
with the basics. Finn.
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Is it true
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00:07:21,567 --> 00:07:22,901
that you thought you got
your girlfriend pregnant
200
00:07:22,985 --> 00:07:24,119
via hot tub?
201
00:07:24,186 --> 00:07:25,570
I have always been dubious.
202
00:07:26,522 --> 00:07:27,622
And Brittany,
203
00:07:27,690 --> 00:07:29,207
you think that
storks bring babies?
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00:07:29,292 --> 00:07:31,543
I get my information
from Woody Woodpecker cartoons.
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00:07:31,627 --> 00:07:35,130
Well, that's all gonna end
right here, right now.
206
00:07:35,197 --> 00:07:37,916
Because today,
we are gonna get under the covers
207
00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:39,801
all together
208
00:07:39,869 --> 00:07:42,721
- and get the ditty on the dirty.
- I'm so turned-on right now.
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00:07:42,805 --> 00:07:46,091
Uh, what about those of us
who choose to remain celibate?
210
00:07:46,175 --> 00:07:48,810
Oh, well, I admire you.
211
00:07:48,878 --> 00:07:50,712
Although I think you're naive
212
00:07:50,763 --> 00:07:53,398
and possibly frigid,
I do admire your choice.
213
00:07:53,483 --> 00:07:55,233
I think this is
a good time for a song.
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00:07:55,318 --> 00:07:57,352
Oh, yes. Okay.
215
00:07:57,403 --> 00:07:58,720
- Okay.
- Rule number one:
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00:07:58,771 --> 00:08:00,322
Every intimate encounter
that you're ever going
217
00:08:00,389 --> 00:08:01,990
to have in your life
is going to start with
218
00:08:02,057 --> 00:08:04,943
a touch. Hit it!
219
00:08:14,754 --> 00:08:16,371
♪ We've been here too long ♪
220
00:08:16,422 --> 00:08:18,423
♪ tryin' to get along. ♪
221
00:08:18,508 --> 00:08:22,427
♪ Pretending
that you're oh so shy. ♪
222
00:08:22,512 --> 00:08:24,096
♪ I'm a natural ma'am, ♪
223
00:08:24,180 --> 00:08:26,181
♪ doin' all I can. ♪
224
00:08:26,248 --> 00:08:29,267
♪ My temperature
is runnin' high. ♪
225
00:08:29,352 --> 00:08:31,636
♪ Cry at night. ♪
226
00:08:31,721 --> 00:08:33,105
♪ No one in sight. ♪
227
00:08:33,189 --> 00:08:37,425
♪ And we got so much to share. ♪
228
00:08:37,477 --> 00:08:39,394
♪ Talking's fine ♪
229
00:08:39,445 --> 00:08:41,229
♪ if you got the time, ♪
230
00:08:41,280 --> 00:08:43,815
♪ but I ain't got
the time to spare. ♪
231
00:08:43,900 --> 00:08:45,367
♪ Yeah... ♪
232
00:08:45,434 --> 00:08:46,985
♪ Do you want to touch... ♪
♪ Yeah... ♪
233
00:08:47,069 --> 00:08:48,870
♪ Do you want to touch... ♪
♪ Yeah... ♪
234
00:08:48,938 --> 00:08:51,456
♪ Do you want
to touch me there? ♪
235
00:08:51,541 --> 00:08:53,158
♪ Where? ♪
236
00:08:53,242 --> 00:08:54,793
♪ Do you want to touch... ♪
♪ Yeah... ♪
237
00:08:54,877 --> 00:08:56,411
♪ Do you want to touch... ♪
♪ Yeah... ♪
238
00:08:56,462 --> 00:08:58,947
♪ Do you want
to touch me there? ♪
239
00:08:58,998 --> 00:09:00,081
♪ Where? ♪
240
00:09:00,133 --> 00:09:02,250
♪ There, yeah... ♪
241
00:09:02,301 --> 00:09:04,786
♪ Yeah, oh, yeah... ♪
242
00:09:04,837 --> 00:09:09,674
♪ Oh, yeah... ♪
243
00:09:09,759 --> 00:09:12,811
♪ Yeah, oh, yeah... ♪
244
00:09:12,895 --> 00:09:16,765
♪ Oh, yeah... ♪
245
00:09:16,816 --> 00:09:18,934
♪ Every girl and boy ♪
246
00:09:18,985 --> 00:09:20,819
♪ needs a little joy. ♪
247
00:09:20,903 --> 00:09:23,989
♪ All you do is sit and stare. ♪
248
00:09:24,073 --> 00:09:26,140
♪ Beggin' on my knees. ♪
249
00:09:26,192 --> 00:09:28,443
♪ Baby, won't you please ♪
250
00:09:28,494 --> 00:09:32,197
♪ run your fingers
through my hair? ♪
251
00:09:32,281 --> 00:09:35,534
♪ My, my, my, whiskey and rye. ♪
252
00:09:35,618 --> 00:09:40,121
♪ Don't it make
you feel so fine? ♪
253
00:09:40,173 --> 00:09:41,489
♪ Right or wrong, ♪
254
00:09:41,541 --> 00:09:43,675
♪ don't it turn you on? ♪
255
00:09:43,759 --> 00:09:47,379
♪ Can't you see we're
wasting time, yeah? ♪
256
00:09:47,463 --> 00:09:49,497
♪ Do you want to touch... ♪
♪ Yeah... ♪
257
00:09:49,549 --> 00:09:51,132
♪ Do you want to touch... ♪
♪ Yeah... ♪
258
00:09:51,184 --> 00:09:55,053
♪ Do you want to touch me there?
Where? ♪
259
00:09:55,137 --> 00:09:57,055
♪ Do you want to touch... ♪
♪ Yeah... ♪
260
00:09:57,139 --> 00:09:59,173
♪ Do you want to touch... ♪
♪ Yeah... ♪
261
00:09:59,225 --> 00:10:01,359
♪ Do you want
to touch me there? ♪
262
00:10:01,444 --> 00:10:03,562
♪ Where? There. ♪
263
00:10:03,646 --> 00:10:05,897
♪ Yeah... ♪
♪ Yeah... ♪
264
00:10:05,982 --> 00:10:08,033
♪ Oh, yeah... ♪
265
00:10:08,117 --> 00:10:09,985
♪ Oh, yeah... ♪
266
00:10:10,036 --> 00:10:12,070
♪ Do ya, do ya? ♪
267
00:10:12,154 --> 00:10:15,373
♪ Yeah, oh, yeah... ♪
268
00:10:15,458 --> 00:10:17,709
♪ Oh, yeah... ♪
269
00:10:17,793 --> 00:10:20,245
♪ Do ya, do ya? ♪
270
00:10:20,329 --> 00:10:21,496
♪ Touch me there... ♪
♪ Yeah, oh, yeah... ♪
271
00:10:21,547 --> 00:10:23,632
♪ You know where... ♪
272
00:10:23,699 --> 00:10:27,669
♪ Oh, yeah... ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah... ♪
273
00:10:27,720 --> 00:10:30,555
♪ Yeah, oh, yeah... ♪
♪ Yeah, oh, yeah... ♪
274
00:10:30,640 --> 00:10:32,757
♪ Oh, yeah... ♪
♪ Oh, yeah... ♪
275
00:10:32,842 --> 00:10:34,726
♪ Do ya, do ya? ♪
276
00:10:38,014 --> 00:10:39,213
So just remember
277
00:10:39,265 --> 00:10:41,266
whenever you have sex
with someone,
278
00:10:41,350 --> 00:10:45,353
you're having sex with everyone
they've ever had sex with.
279
00:10:45,404 --> 00:10:47,372
And everybody's got a random.
280
00:10:50,675 --> 00:10:51,859
Don't you think it's time
for the Warblers
281
00:10:51,943 --> 00:10:53,227
to do
a Joan Armatrading medley?
282
00:10:53,311 --> 00:10:55,613
Um, I'm not so sure
people know who that is.
283
00:10:55,680 --> 00:10:59,366
Well, well, if it isn't my sweet,
sweet Porcelain.
284
00:10:59,451 --> 00:11:00,534
Coach Sylvester.
285
00:11:00,619 --> 00:11:01,952
What are you doing here?
286
00:11:02,020 --> 00:11:03,654
Oh, just picking up
some coffee.
287
00:11:03,705 --> 00:11:06,290
I like my enemas piping hot.
288
00:11:06,357 --> 00:11:07,858
Actually, boys, I heard
289
00:11:07,909 --> 00:11:10,644
that this was a Dalton
Academy hangout, and I come
290
00:11:10,712 --> 00:11:12,880
in a spirit of fellowship.
291
00:11:12,964 --> 00:11:14,767
As you no doubt have heard,
I've taken over
292
00:11:14,790 --> 00:11:16,974
for the coach of Aural Intensity.
293
00:11:16,998 --> 00:11:17,918
We heard you pushed him
down the stairs.
294
00:11:18,003 --> 00:11:19,303
No, you can't prove that.
295
00:11:19,370 --> 00:11:22,089
This is just sort of
how she talks.
296
00:11:22,173 --> 00:11:26,093
So, I happen to have
some top secret intel.
297
00:11:26,177 --> 00:11:27,561
Will Schuester
has finally realized
298
00:11:27,646 --> 00:11:29,513
that his team's Achilles' heel
299
00:11:29,564 --> 00:11:31,565
is their utter lack
of sex appeal.
300
00:11:31,650 --> 00:11:35,986
The New Directions
are getting sexy.
301
00:11:36,054 --> 00:11:38,355
And the key to Regionals
is out-sexing them.
302
00:11:38,406 --> 00:11:40,390
And I suspect
303
00:11:40,442 --> 00:11:44,161
that the judges are scoring
extra for it this year.
304
00:11:44,228 --> 00:11:45,829
So, Porcelain,
305
00:11:45,897 --> 00:11:47,831
quid pro quo:
306
00:11:49,167 --> 00:11:51,085
What do you have for me?
307
00:11:51,169 --> 00:11:54,738
I'm sorry, Coach,
but you and are not in cahoots.
308
00:11:54,789 --> 00:11:56,340
Probably should have
nailed that down
309
00:11:56,407 --> 00:11:59,376
before I gave you
my top secret intel.
310
00:11:59,427 --> 00:12:01,178
Porcelain,
311
00:12:01,245 --> 00:12:04,682
you just made a powerful enema.
312
00:12:06,434 --> 00:12:08,352
We got to hold an
emergency meeting.
313
00:12:08,419 --> 00:12:10,137
- Why?
- Weren't you listening?
314
00:12:10,221 --> 00:12:12,422
The judges at Regionals
have an eye out
315
00:12:12,474 --> 00:12:14,158
for something new,
which means...
316
00:12:14,225 --> 00:12:18,612
The Warblers got to do
something sexy-fied.
317
00:12:20,648 --> 00:12:22,616
I am very disappointed
in you, Will.
318
00:12:22,701 --> 00:12:24,318
Letting Holly come in and just
319
00:12:24,402 --> 00:12:25,936
teach the Glee kids
about... stuff.
320
00:12:25,987 --> 00:12:28,438
I mean, why didn't you
just pair them up, huh?
321
00:12:28,490 --> 00:12:29,773
Rent them a bunch
of motel rooms?
322
00:12:29,824 --> 00:12:31,775
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
I had no choice, Emma.
323
00:12:31,826 --> 00:12:33,744
These kids are
totally unprepared.
324
00:12:33,795 --> 00:12:35,212
Look, in the spirit
of fairness,
325
00:12:35,279 --> 00:12:37,498
why don't you and the kids
in your Celibacy Club
326
00:12:37,582 --> 00:12:38,949
come in and do a number?
327
00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:41,135
What, like, sing?
328
00:12:41,219 --> 00:12:44,471
Yeah. We're trying
to teach through song.
329
00:12:44,556 --> 00:12:47,457
And yours can be
a counterargument to Holly's.
330
00:12:47,509 --> 00:12:50,144
Well, I look forward
to the opportunity
331
00:12:50,228 --> 00:12:51,845
to nail her to the wall.
332
00:12:53,181 --> 00:12:55,799
You know what I mean.
333
00:12:57,736 --> 00:12:59,937
Well, Puckerman,
it's your lucky day.
334
00:12:59,988 --> 00:13:01,972
You're finally going
to let me motorboat those twins?
335
00:13:02,023 --> 00:13:04,691
Remember I told you I had
a master plan? Here it is.
336
00:13:04,776 --> 00:13:06,827
Can you think of a celebrity
who released a tape
337
00:13:06,911 --> 00:13:08,979
of their intimate relations that
didn't make them more famous?
338
00:13:09,047 --> 00:13:10,364
If this is going
where I think it's going,
339
00:13:10,448 --> 00:13:11,648
I may need to sit down.
340
00:13:11,699 --> 00:13:13,417
Rachel Berry wants to
be a famous singer.
341
00:13:13,484 --> 00:13:14,918
I just want to be famous.
342
00:13:14,986 --> 00:13:16,670
Doing that number for Glee Club
343
00:13:16,755 --> 00:13:18,822
was my first step
toward being a star.
344
00:13:18,873 --> 00:13:20,457
I want to be like a Kardashian.
345
00:13:20,508 --> 00:13:22,209
I want a TV show
and a fragrance.
346
00:13:22,293 --> 00:13:23,877
It'll be called Zizes,
347
00:13:23,962 --> 00:13:26,096
and the slogan will be
"You just got Ziced!"
348
00:13:27,932 --> 00:13:30,467
I'm not sure I heard
that last part right,
349
00:13:30,518 --> 00:13:32,186
'cause I'm getting
a little light-headed,
350
00:13:32,270 --> 00:13:34,888
but if we make one
of those tape, that means...
351
00:13:34,973 --> 00:13:38,341
Wow. If your lovemaking
prowess is as impressive
352
00:13:38,393 --> 00:13:41,278
as your skills at deduction,
I'm in for a wild night.
353
00:13:41,345 --> 00:13:43,063
I would like
to welcome the ladies
354
00:13:43,148 --> 00:13:44,832
of our sister school,
Crawford Country Day.
355
00:13:44,899 --> 00:13:48,068
As you know,
the Warblers are competing
356
00:13:48,153 --> 00:13:50,154
in our show choir's Regionals
competition next week.
357
00:13:50,205 --> 00:13:52,022
So, what we're going for here
358
00:13:52,073 --> 00:13:55,542
today, ladies,
is something a little...
359
00:13:55,627 --> 00:13:57,828
A little sexy.
360
00:13:57,879 --> 00:13:58,829
But we need your input.
361
00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:02,249
Are we scream worthy?
362
00:14:02,333 --> 00:14:04,251
Do we make your knees
turn to jelly?
363
00:14:04,335 --> 00:14:08,505
So, without further ado,
hang on to your bobby socks, girls,
364
00:14:08,556 --> 00:14:10,924
'cause we're about
to rock your world.
365
00:14:14,179 --> 00:14:17,397
♪ Na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na,
na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na... ♪
366
00:14:17,482 --> 00:14:20,884
♪ Na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na,
na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na... ♪
367
00:14:20,935 --> 00:14:23,570
♪ Na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na,
na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na... ♪
368
00:14:23,655 --> 00:14:28,408
♪ Na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na,
na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na... ♪
369
00:14:28,493 --> 00:14:29,910
♪ Here we are again. ♪
♪ Na-na, na-na... ♪
370
00:14:29,994 --> 00:14:33,914
♪ I feel the chemicals
kickin' in. ♪
371
00:14:33,998 --> 00:14:37,668
♪ It's getting heavy,
and I wanna run and hide. ♪
372
00:14:37,735 --> 00:14:39,953
♪ I wanna run and hide. ♪
♪ Na-na, na-na... ♪
373
00:14:40,038 --> 00:14:41,121
Ooh!
374
00:14:41,206 --> 00:14:44,208
♪ I do it every time. ♪
375
00:14:44,259 --> 00:14:47,211
♪ You're killin' me now. ♪
376
00:14:47,262 --> 00:14:50,931
♪ And I won't be denied by you, ♪
377
00:14:51,015 --> 00:14:54,584
♪ the animal inside of you. ♪
378
00:14:54,636 --> 00:14:57,855
♪ Oh, oh, I want some more. ♪
379
00:14:57,922 --> 00:15:01,808
♪ Oh, oh,
what are you waiting for? ♪
380
00:15:01,893 --> 00:15:04,394
♪ Take a bite
of my heart tonight. ♪
381
00:15:04,445 --> 00:15:07,597
♪ Oh, oh, I want some more. ♪
382
00:15:07,649 --> 00:15:11,768
♪ Oh, oh,
what are you waiting for? ♪
383
00:15:11,819 --> 00:15:15,038
♪ What are you waiting for? ♪
384
00:15:15,106 --> 00:15:17,207
♪ Say good-bye
to my heart tonight. ♪
385
00:15:17,275 --> 00:15:20,827
♪ Hush, hush,
the world is quiet. ♪
386
00:15:20,912 --> 00:15:23,914
♪ Oh, oh-oh, oh, oh... ♪
♪ Hush, hush, we both can't fight it. ♪
387
00:15:23,965 --> 00:15:25,949
♪ It's us that made this mess. ♪
388
00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:29,253
♪ Why can't you understand? ♪
389
00:15:29,304 --> 00:15:33,891
♪ Whoa, I won't sleep tonight. ♪
390
00:15:33,958 --> 00:15:36,977
♪ Oh, oh, I want some more. ♪
♪ Some more... ♪
391
00:15:37,061 --> 00:15:40,480
♪ Oh, oh,
what are you waiting for? ♪
392
00:15:40,565 --> 00:15:43,517
♪ Take a bite
of my heart tonight. ♪
393
00:15:43,601 --> 00:15:46,737
♪ Oh, oh, I want some more. ♪
♪ Some more... ♪
394
00:15:46,804 --> 00:15:50,657
♪ Oh, oh,
what are you waiting for? ♪
395
00:15:50,742 --> 00:15:53,810
♪ What are you waiting for? ♪
396
00:15:53,861 --> 00:15:56,313
♪ What are you waiting...? ♪
397
00:15:56,364 --> 00:15:59,917
♪ Here we go again. ♪
♪ Oh, oh... ♪
398
00:15:59,984 --> 00:16:02,085
♪ Here we go again. ♪
399
00:16:02,153 --> 00:16:04,588
♪ Oh, oh. ♪
♪ Here we go again. ♪
400
00:16:04,655 --> 00:16:05,923
♪ Oh, oh... ♪
401
00:16:05,990 --> 00:16:10,177
♪ Say good-bye
to my heart tonight. ♪
402
00:16:12,163 --> 00:16:13,547
Call us.
403
00:16:15,967 --> 00:16:18,335
Sweet, but not on your team.
404
00:16:21,439 --> 00:16:22,439
Are you okay?
405
00:16:22,506 --> 00:16:23,807
You kept making
406
00:16:23,858 --> 00:16:25,943
those weird faces
the whole song.
407
00:16:26,010 --> 00:16:27,394
Those weren't weird faces.
408
00:16:27,462 --> 00:16:29,229
Those were my sexy faces.
409
00:16:29,314 --> 00:16:32,332
It just looked like
you were having gas pains
410
00:16:32,400 --> 00:16:33,900
or something.
411
00:16:33,985 --> 00:16:36,570
Great. How are we supposed to
get up on the stage at Regionals
412
00:16:36,654 --> 00:16:39,623
and sell sexy to the judges when
I have as much sexual appeal
413
00:16:39,690 --> 00:16:41,041
and knowledge as a baby penguin?
414
00:16:41,125 --> 00:16:43,010
We'll figure something out.
415
00:16:47,602 --> 00:16:50,321
I want to talk
to you about something.
416
00:16:50,388 --> 00:16:52,940
I really like
when we make out and stuff.
417
00:16:53,024 --> 00:16:54,725
Which isn't cheating,
because...?
418
00:16:54,776 --> 00:16:58,312
- The plumbing's different.
- Mm-hmm.
419
00:16:58,380 --> 00:16:59,864
But when Artie
and I are together,
420
00:16:59,915 --> 00:17:01,081
we talk about stuff,
like feelings.
421
00:17:01,166 --> 00:17:02,500
Why?
422
00:17:02,567 --> 00:17:04,602
Because with feelings,
it's better.
423
00:17:04,669 --> 00:17:06,069
Are you kidding?
424
00:17:06,121 --> 00:17:08,405
It's better when it
doesn't involve feelings.
425
00:17:08,456 --> 00:17:10,240
I think it's better when it
doesn't involve eye contact.
426
00:17:10,292 --> 00:17:13,627
I don't know. I guess I just
don't know how I feel about us.
427
00:17:13,712 --> 00:17:14,912
Look...
428
00:17:14,963 --> 00:17:16,246
Let's be clear here.
429
00:17:16,298 --> 00:17:18,015
I'm not interested
in any labels,
430
00:17:18,082 --> 00:17:20,284
unless it's on something
I shoplift.
431
00:17:20,352 --> 00:17:21,785
I don't know, Santana.
432
00:17:21,853 --> 00:17:23,554
I think
we should talk to somebody.
433
00:17:23,605 --> 00:17:25,055
Like an adult.
434
00:17:25,106 --> 00:17:26,774
This relationship
is really confusing for me.
435
00:17:26,858 --> 00:17:28,409
Breakfast is confusing for you.
436
00:17:28,476 --> 00:17:30,845
Well, sometimes it's sweet,
and sometimes it's salty.
437
00:17:30,912 --> 00:17:33,781
Like, what if I have eggs for dinner?
Then what is it?
438
00:17:36,267 --> 00:17:37,434
Those linens are incredible.
439
00:17:37,485 --> 00:17:38,869
I know.
Is that Egyptian cotton?
440
00:17:38,937 --> 00:17:41,455
Why do they keep editing all
this vacation and plane stuff?
441
00:17:41,540 --> 00:17:42,923
It classes it up.
442
00:17:42,991 --> 00:17:45,876
If I want to see Kim Kardashian
being classy, I'll watch E!
443
00:17:45,944 --> 00:17:47,077
Touch me.
444
00:17:47,128 --> 00:17:49,780
We're not putting any
of that stuff in ours.
445
00:17:49,831 --> 00:17:51,632
- Well, maybe...
- Hey, guys. What's going on?
446
00:17:51,716 --> 00:17:54,335
- Oh, hey, Miss H. Hey, can you help us out?
- Uh, yeah.
447
00:17:54,419 --> 00:17:56,470
Lauren and I are gonna
make a sex tape.
448
00:17:56,555 --> 00:17:58,055
So I can get a
recording contract.
449
00:17:58,122 --> 00:17:59,390
Wow. Okay.
450
00:17:59,457 --> 00:18:00,891
Well, first, can I just say
451
00:18:00,959 --> 00:18:03,060
that I'm very impressed
by not only your ambition,
452
00:18:03,127 --> 00:18:05,479
but by how comfortable you are
with your own bodies?
453
00:18:05,564 --> 00:18:07,681
Easy to be comfortable
when you look this good.
454
00:18:07,766 --> 00:18:08,816
- You know what I mean?
- Agreed.
455
00:18:08,900 --> 00:18:10,818
Uh, now for the downside.
456
00:18:10,902 --> 00:18:13,404
Are you aware that because
you're under eighteen years of age,
457
00:18:13,471 --> 00:18:15,806
making and owning a sex tape
could make you guilty
458
00:18:15,857 --> 00:18:18,025
of child pornography?
459
00:18:18,109 --> 00:18:21,028
Listen, guys, don't take this
too hard, all right?
460
00:18:21,112 --> 00:18:23,197
These things just...
They never work out well.
461
00:18:23,281 --> 00:18:27,651
My sex tape with J.D. Salinger
was a disaster.
462
00:18:27,702 --> 00:18:31,338
- Thanks, Miss H.
- Later, dudes.
463
00:18:31,423 --> 00:18:32,623
Ladies.
464
00:18:32,674 --> 00:18:34,925
Miss Holiday,
we need your help.
465
00:18:36,461 --> 00:18:38,712
So, why are we
sitting on the floor?
466
00:18:38,797 --> 00:18:40,714
'Cause we're in Japan.
467
00:18:40,799 --> 00:18:42,549
No.
468
00:18:42,634 --> 00:18:46,503
Welcome to my sacred,
sexy sharing circle.
469
00:18:46,554 --> 00:18:49,006
I want to thank you guys
for confiding in me,
470
00:18:49,057 --> 00:18:50,641
'cause I know this is tough.
471
00:18:50,692 --> 00:18:52,726
And I want to ask both of you
472
00:18:52,811 --> 00:18:56,513
if either one of you thinks
that you might be a lesbian.
473
00:18:56,564 --> 00:18:58,699
I don't know.
474
00:18:58,783 --> 00:19:00,200
Yeah, I mean, who knows?
475
00:19:00,285 --> 00:19:03,537
I'm attracted to girls,
and I'm attracted to guys.
476
00:19:03,622 --> 00:19:05,205
I've made out with a mannequin.
477
00:19:05,290 --> 00:19:07,458
I even had a sex
dream about a shrub
478
00:19:07,525 --> 00:19:09,693
that was just in the
shape of a person.
479
00:19:09,744 --> 00:19:11,795
Hmm. Well, we've all been there.
480
00:19:11,863 --> 00:19:13,747
I went to an all-girls college
481
00:19:13,832 --> 00:19:16,050
where the only industry
in the town
482
00:19:16,134 --> 00:19:18,702
was the manufacturing
of softball equipment.
483
00:19:18,753 --> 00:19:22,556
I still feel a little tingle
when I hear Ani DiFranco.
484
00:19:22,641 --> 00:19:25,559
Ooh!
485
00:19:25,644 --> 00:19:26,877
Anyway, it's not about
486
00:19:26,928 --> 00:19:28,595
who you are attracted to,
ultimately.
487
00:19:28,680 --> 00:19:30,597
It's about who you
fall in love with.
488
00:19:30,682 --> 00:19:32,816
Well, I don't know how I feel,
489
00:19:32,884 --> 00:19:35,218
because Santana refuses
to talk about it.
490
00:19:35,270 --> 00:19:38,772
Okay, well, I know talking about
feelings can be really hard,
491
00:19:38,857 --> 00:19:41,408
so I have an idea.
492
00:19:41,493 --> 00:19:43,911
Why don't you guys find a song
493
00:19:43,995 --> 00:19:46,897
and see if maybe the lyrics
of the song could help you
494
00:19:46,948 --> 00:19:49,149
start a dialogue going?
495
00:19:49,217 --> 00:19:50,751
I could be down with that.
496
00:19:50,835 --> 00:19:54,204
I have the perfect song.
497
00:19:54,255 --> 00:19:55,739
There's just one problem, though.
498
00:19:55,790 --> 00:19:58,926
Brit and I may need your help
to sing it.
499
00:19:59,010 --> 00:20:01,612
I thought you'd never ask.
500
00:20:02,664 --> 00:20:04,965
All right, so give me sensual.
501
00:20:05,050 --> 00:20:07,384
But don't make fun of it.
Like, really try.
502
00:20:11,189 --> 00:20:14,058
Okay. Now give me... sultry.
503
00:20:18,580 --> 00:20:21,431
Um, Kurt, they're all
sort of looking the same.
504
00:20:21,483 --> 00:20:24,051
That's because the face I'm
actually doing is uncomfortable.
505
00:20:24,119 --> 00:20:25,569
This is pointless, Blaine.
506
00:20:25,620 --> 00:20:27,321
I don't know how to be sexy,
507
00:20:27,405 --> 00:20:29,323
because I don't know
the first thing about sex.
508
00:20:29,407 --> 00:20:30,941
Kurt, you're blushing.
509
00:20:30,992 --> 00:20:33,160
I've tried watching
those movies,
510
00:20:33,244 --> 00:20:34,528
but I just get
horribly depressed.
511
00:20:34,596 --> 00:20:36,130
And I think about how
they were all kids once,
512
00:20:36,214 --> 00:20:37,414
and they all have mothers.
513
00:20:37,465 --> 00:20:38,665
And, God, what would
their mothers think?
514
00:20:38,750 --> 00:20:40,117
And why would you get
that tattoo there?
515
00:20:40,168 --> 00:20:41,785
Then maybe we should have
a conversation about it.
516
00:20:41,836 --> 00:20:43,420
I'll tell you what I know.
517
00:20:43,471 --> 00:20:45,589
I don't... I don't want to
know the graphic details.
518
00:20:45,640 --> 00:20:47,141
I like romance.
519
00:20:47,208 --> 00:20:49,560
That's why I like
Broadway musicals,
520
00:20:49,627 --> 00:20:51,294
because the touch
of the fingertips
521
00:20:51,346 --> 00:20:53,313
is as sexy as it gets.
522
00:20:53,398 --> 00:20:55,015
Kurt, you're going to have
to learn about it someday.
523
00:20:55,100 --> 00:20:56,567
Well, not today.
524
00:20:56,634 --> 00:20:59,036
I think I've learned quite
enough for today, thank you.
525
00:20:59,087 --> 00:21:00,621
I think you should leave.
526
00:21:05,910 --> 00:21:07,261
So just nice and easy.
I don't want
527
00:21:07,345 --> 00:21:08,929
to go too far away
from the original version.
528
00:21:09,013 --> 00:21:10,097
Since when do you need help
529
00:21:10,181 --> 00:21:11,215
singing in front
of the Glee Club?
530
00:21:11,266 --> 00:21:12,749
Oh, it's not about the singing.
531
00:21:12,801 --> 00:21:14,685
I'm trying to make Prince's
"Kiss" into a tango.
532
00:21:14,752 --> 00:21:16,103
Just want to make sure
it's appropriate.
533
00:21:16,187 --> 00:21:18,255
"Kiss" as a tango?
534
00:21:18,306 --> 00:21:21,191
That's awesome and ridiculous.
535
00:21:21,259 --> 00:21:23,727
Anyway, I want to do this right
for the sexy lesson.
536
00:21:23,778 --> 00:21:24,895
So picture us
537
00:21:24,946 --> 00:21:26,613
in the auditorium,
big backdrop,
538
00:21:26,698 --> 00:21:30,200
lighting, costume,
the whole thing.
539
00:21:33,621 --> 00:21:35,272
Hit it.
540
00:21:37,275 --> 00:21:38,325
♪ Uh! ♪
541
00:21:44,799 --> 00:21:49,586
♪ You don't have
to be beautiful ♪
542
00:21:49,637 --> 00:21:52,339
♪ to turn me on. ♪
543
00:21:52,423 --> 00:21:57,978
♪ I just need your body, baby, ♪
544
00:21:58,062 --> 00:22:00,597
♪ from dusk till dawn. ♪
545
00:22:00,648 --> 00:22:05,602
♪ You don't need experience ♪
546
00:22:05,653 --> 00:22:08,405
♪ to turn me out. ♪
547
00:22:09,824 --> 00:22:13,944
♪ You just leave it
all up to me. ♪
548
00:22:13,995 --> 00:22:18,832
♪ I'm gonna show you
what it's all about. ♪
549
00:22:18,917 --> 00:22:21,702
♪ You don't have to be rich ♪
550
00:22:21,786 --> 00:22:23,086
♪ to be my girl. ♪
551
00:22:23,154 --> 00:22:25,756
♪ You don't have to be cool ♪
552
00:22:25,823 --> 00:22:27,708
♪ to rule my world. ♪
553
00:22:27,792 --> 00:22:29,510
♪ Ain't no particular sign ♪
554
00:22:29,594 --> 00:22:31,929
♪ I'm more compatible with, ♪
555
00:22:31,996 --> 00:22:35,048
♪ I just want your extra time ♪
556
00:22:35,133 --> 00:22:39,102
♪ and your... kiss. ♪
557
00:22:40,104 --> 00:22:42,105
♪ Yeah... ♪
558
00:22:45,527 --> 00:22:48,862
♪ Women, not girls,
rule my world. ♪
559
00:22:48,947 --> 00:22:51,448
♪ I said, they rule my world. ♪
560
00:22:54,352 --> 00:22:56,820
♪ Act your age,
not your shoe size. ♪
561
00:22:56,871 --> 00:22:58,572
♪ Not your shoe size... ♪
562
00:22:58,656 --> 00:23:01,875
♪ Maybe we can do the twirl. ♪
563
00:23:01,960 --> 00:23:05,245
♪ You don't have
to watch Dynasty ♪
564
00:23:05,330 --> 00:23:07,798
♪ to have an attitude. ♪
565
00:23:10,251 --> 00:23:13,754
♪ You just leave
it all up to me. ♪
566
00:23:13,838 --> 00:23:17,540
♪ My love will be your food. ♪
567
00:23:17,592 --> 00:23:18,842
♪ Yeah... ♪
568
00:23:18,893 --> 00:23:21,228
♪ You don't have to be rich ♪
569
00:23:21,312 --> 00:23:23,013
♪ to be my girl. ♪
570
00:23:23,064 --> 00:23:27,734
♪ Don't have to be cool
to rule my world. ♪
571
00:23:27,819 --> 00:23:29,653
♪ Ain't no particular sign ♪
572
00:23:29,720 --> 00:23:31,071
♪ I'm more compatible with, ♪
573
00:23:31,155 --> 00:23:34,741
♪ I just want your extra time ♪
574
00:23:34,826 --> 00:23:37,327
♪ and your ♪
575
00:23:37,395 --> 00:23:39,062
♪ kiss. ♪
576
00:23:43,084 --> 00:23:44,167
I am so into you.
577
00:23:44,235 --> 00:23:47,737
- Don't be.
- Go out with me.
578
00:23:47,789 --> 00:23:49,572
Oh, you don't want any of this.
579
00:23:49,624 --> 00:23:51,008
I'm damaged goods.
580
00:23:51,075 --> 00:23:52,960
Yes, it makes me
terrific in bed,
581
00:23:53,044 --> 00:23:55,745
but it also means I tend
to break nice guys like you
582
00:23:55,797 --> 00:23:57,580
into Wasa crackers.
583
00:23:57,632 --> 00:23:59,416
Oh, I think I can handle it.
584
00:23:59,467 --> 00:24:01,751
You married
your high school sweetheart,
585
00:24:01,803 --> 00:24:03,437
and then you went out
with a virgin.
586
00:24:04,973 --> 00:24:07,724
It's a great song.
587
00:24:07,775 --> 00:24:09,426
You don't need me, though.
The kids are going to love it.
588
00:24:18,586 --> 00:24:21,204
Need a hand?
589
00:24:23,207 --> 00:24:24,941
Yeah, why don't you hand
me that carburetor?
590
00:24:27,829 --> 00:24:29,796
How'd you know
which one it was?
591
00:24:29,881 --> 00:24:32,299
My dad and I
rebuilt a '59 Chevy
592
00:24:32,383 --> 00:24:33,633
in our driveway
two summers ago.
593
00:24:33,718 --> 00:24:36,286
One of his many
attempts at bonding.
594
00:24:36,337 --> 00:24:38,955
- You here looking for parts?
- No, actually.
595
00:24:39,006 --> 00:24:40,340
I, uh, wanted to talk
to you about Kurt.
596
00:24:40,425 --> 00:24:42,008
Is he okay?
597
00:24:42,093 --> 00:24:45,462
Have you ever talked
to him about sex?
598
00:24:45,513 --> 00:24:48,181
Are you gay
or straight or what?
599
00:24:48,266 --> 00:24:51,935
- I'm definitely gay.
- Okay. Good.
600
00:24:51,986 --> 00:24:54,187
I mean, you know,
whatever, but, uh...
601
00:24:54,272 --> 00:24:55,472
You know, good for Kurt.
602
00:24:55,523 --> 00:24:58,308
He needs someone like you
to talk to.
603
00:24:58,359 --> 00:25:00,410
Well, that's kind of my point.
604
00:25:00,478 --> 00:25:01,862
I've tried talking to him,
605
00:25:01,946 --> 00:25:03,914
but he basically puts his
fingers in his ears
606
00:25:03,981 --> 00:25:05,315
and starts singing.
607
00:25:05,366 --> 00:25:07,751
Well, when he's ready,
he'll listen.
608
00:25:07,818 --> 00:25:09,503
I'm worried that
it might be too late.
609
00:25:09,587 --> 00:25:12,622
You know, Dalton doesn't
even have sex ed classes.
610
00:25:12,673 --> 00:25:14,324
Most schools don't,
and the ones that do
611
00:25:14,375 --> 00:25:16,326
almost never discuss what
sex is like for gay kids.
612
00:25:16,377 --> 00:25:20,830
Kurt is... is the most moral,
613
00:25:20,882 --> 00:25:22,716
compassionate person
I've ever met.
614
00:25:22,800 --> 00:25:24,601
You know, he gets that
from his mother.
615
00:25:24,668 --> 00:25:27,354
And... And I am blown away
by your guys' relationship.
616
00:25:27,438 --> 00:25:30,791
You think my dad built a car
with me because he loves cars?
617
00:25:30,858 --> 00:25:32,008
I think he did it
618
00:25:32,059 --> 00:25:34,144
because he thought
getting my hands dirty
619
00:25:34,195 --> 00:25:36,012
might make me straight.
620
00:25:36,080 --> 00:25:41,118
You know, did he talk to you
about this, uh, kind of stuff?
621
00:25:41,185 --> 00:25:43,820
No. I had to go
find it for myself.
622
00:25:43,871 --> 00:25:46,523
The Internet is great,
and all the information is out there,
623
00:25:46,574 --> 00:25:47,791
but I went searching for it.
624
00:25:47,858 --> 00:25:49,409
Kurt won't.
625
00:25:49,494 --> 00:25:50,961
And one day,
he'll be at a party,
626
00:25:51,028 --> 00:25:53,964
and maybe have a few drinks
627
00:25:54,031 --> 00:25:55,698
and then he'll meet some guy
and start fooling around.
628
00:25:55,750 --> 00:25:58,635
And he's not going to know
about using protection
629
00:25:58,702 --> 00:26:00,303
or STDs.
630
00:26:00,371 --> 00:26:02,756
I don't have the relationship
631
00:26:02,840 --> 00:26:05,642
with my dad
that you have with Kurt.
632
00:26:08,980 --> 00:26:12,599
I think it would be really cool
if you took advantage of that.
633
00:26:14,885 --> 00:26:16,236
I'm sorry if I'm overstepping.
634
00:26:16,320 --> 00:26:18,738
You are.
635
00:26:29,867 --> 00:26:33,620
♪ I took my love
and I took it down. ♪
636
00:26:36,591 --> 00:26:40,293
♪ I climbed a mountain
and I turned around. ♪
637
00:26:41,546 --> 00:26:45,098
♪ And I saw my reflection ♪
638
00:26:45,183 --> 00:26:48,268
♪ in the snow-covered hills. ♪
639
00:26:48,352 --> 00:26:53,523
♪ Well, the landslide
brought me down. ♪
640
00:26:55,560 --> 00:26:59,779
♪ Oh, mirror in the sky,
what is love? ♪
641
00:27:01,482 --> 00:27:07,737
♪ Can the child within my heart
rise above? ♪
642
00:27:07,788 --> 00:27:14,461
♪ Can I sail through
the changing ocean tides? ♪
643
00:27:14,545 --> 00:27:22,118
♪ Can I handle the seasons
of my life? ♪
644
00:27:22,169 --> 00:27:27,307
♪ Oh, oh... ♪
♪ Oh, oh... ♪
645
00:27:27,391 --> 00:27:29,309
♪ Oh, oh... ♪
♪ Oh, oh... ♪
646
00:27:29,393 --> 00:27:34,297
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh... ♪
647
00:27:34,348 --> 00:27:39,986
♪ Well, I've been afraid
of changing ♪
648
00:27:40,071 --> 00:27:47,027
♪ 'cause I built
my life around you. ♪
649
00:27:47,111 --> 00:27:50,780
♪ But time makes you bolder. ♪
650
00:27:50,831 --> 00:27:54,334
♪ Children get older. ♪
651
00:27:54,418 --> 00:28:00,373
♪ And I'm getting older, too. ♪
652
00:28:00,458 --> 00:28:06,930
♪ Well, I'm getting older, too. ♪
653
00:28:06,997 --> 00:28:09,766
♪ So, take this love ♪
654
00:28:09,833 --> 00:28:13,303
♪ and take it down. ♪
655
00:28:13,354 --> 00:28:20,026
♪ Yeah, and if you climb a
mountain and you turn around. ♪
656
00:28:20,111 --> 00:28:26,366
♪ And if you see my reflection
in the snow-covered hills... ♪
657
00:28:26,450 --> 00:28:32,372
♪ Well, the landslide
brought me down. ♪
658
00:28:32,456 --> 00:28:40,130
♪ And if you see my reflection
in the snow-covered hills... ♪
659
00:28:40,197 --> 00:28:46,953
♪ Well, maybe... ♪
660
00:28:47,021 --> 00:28:53,593
♪ Well, maybe... ♪
661
00:28:53,678 --> 00:28:59,265
♪ The landslide
will bring you down. ♪
662
00:29:04,355 --> 00:29:08,942
- Is that really how you feel?
- Uh, yeah.
663
00:29:13,698 --> 00:29:15,198
Thank you.
664
00:29:15,249 --> 00:29:18,952
Pretty cool that our girlfriends
are such good friends, right?
665
00:29:19,036 --> 00:29:20,420
I wish you and I
were that close.
666
00:29:20,504 --> 00:29:21,888
Can I just applaud this trio
667
00:29:21,956 --> 00:29:25,342
for exploring the uncharted
world of Sapphic charm?
668
00:29:25,409 --> 00:29:26,710
Brava. Brava.
669
00:29:26,761 --> 00:29:29,813
Look, just because
I sang a song with Brittany
670
00:29:29,880 --> 00:29:31,514
doesn't mean that you can
put a label on me.
671
00:29:31,582 --> 00:29:32,716
Is that clear?
672
00:29:39,223 --> 00:29:41,441
This meeting of the Celibacy Club
will now come to order.
673
00:29:41,525 --> 00:29:43,309
Before we begin,
I would just like to start
674
00:29:43,377 --> 00:29:44,778
by congratulating you by
reminding you
675
00:29:44,862 --> 00:29:46,246
not one member of this club
676
00:29:46,313 --> 00:29:48,615
has had an unwanted pregnancy
in almost a year.
677
00:29:48,699 --> 00:29:50,066
You get tenses for menses.
678
00:29:50,117 --> 00:29:51,701
I'd also like to welcome
our newest member,
679
00:29:51,769 --> 00:29:52,902
Noah Puckerman.
680
00:29:52,953 --> 00:29:55,605
- Are you lost, Noah?
- Yeah, you don't belong here.
681
00:29:55,656 --> 00:29:56,823
You're the biggest
French whore of them all.
682
00:29:56,907 --> 00:29:58,324
Zizes and I were going
to make a sex tape.
683
00:29:58,409 --> 00:29:59,693
I found out that
684
00:29:59,760 --> 00:30:01,227
making that tape would have
resulted in my arrest.
685
00:30:01,295 --> 00:30:02,796
I've hit rock bottom,
686
00:30:02,880 --> 00:30:03,897
and I've come here
to set myself straight.
687
00:30:03,964 --> 00:30:05,215
That's just awesome, Noah.
688
00:30:05,282 --> 00:30:06,883
And you're just in time,
because tomorrow
689
00:30:06,950 --> 00:30:08,968
the girls and I are going
to perform a song for Glee Club
690
00:30:09,053 --> 00:30:10,953
extolling the benefits
of celibacy.
691
00:30:11,005 --> 00:30:12,505
I'm down for that.
692
00:30:12,590 --> 00:30:14,090
Point of order, though.
693
00:30:14,141 --> 00:30:16,176
While three chicks and me is
just a typical Saturday night
694
00:30:16,243 --> 00:30:17,460
in the Puckerman bedroom,
695
00:30:17,511 --> 00:30:18,895
it's not the best balance
for singing.
696
00:30:18,962 --> 00:30:20,213
We need at least one more dude.
697
00:30:20,281 --> 00:30:22,515
I've got that covered.
698
00:30:28,806 --> 00:30:30,473
♪ Gonna find my baby, ♪
699
00:30:30,524 --> 00:30:32,192
♪ gonna hold her tight, ♪
700
00:30:32,276 --> 00:30:35,478
♪ gonna grab
some afternoon delight. ♪
701
00:30:35,529 --> 00:30:38,698
♪ My motto's always been
"When it's right, it's right." ♪
702
00:30:38,783 --> 00:30:42,001
♪ Why wait until the middle
of a cold, dark night? ♪
703
00:30:42,086 --> 00:30:48,341
♪ When everything's a little
clearer in the light of day ♪
704
00:30:48,426 --> 00:30:54,798
♪ and we know the night is
always gonna be here anyway. ♪
705
00:30:54,849 --> 00:30:57,467
♪ Thinking of you's
working up an appetite. ♪
706
00:30:57,518 --> 00:31:01,387
♪ Looking forward
to a little afternoon delight. ♪
707
00:31:01,472 --> 00:31:02,772
♪ Rubbin' sticks and stones
together ♪
708
00:31:02,840 --> 00:31:04,340
♪ makes the sparks ignite. ♪
709
00:31:04,391 --> 00:31:08,344
♪ And the thought of lovin' you
is getting so excitin'. ♪
710
00:31:08,395 --> 00:31:11,030
♪ Skyrockets in flight, ♪
711
00:31:11,115 --> 00:31:14,984
♪ afternoon delight. ♪
712
00:31:16,186 --> 00:31:22,075
♪ Ah... ♪
713
00:31:22,159 --> 00:31:24,360
♪ Afternoon delight. ♪
714
00:31:28,415 --> 00:31:31,384
- Hi. Um, Holly here.
- Yeah?
715
00:31:31,469 --> 00:31:32,702
So I'm a little confused.
716
00:31:32,753 --> 00:31:37,257
Isn't this a strange song for the...
the Celibacy Club to sing?
717
00:31:37,341 --> 00:31:38,892
But why?
718
00:31:38,976 --> 00:31:41,094
It's so wholesome.
719
00:31:41,178 --> 00:31:42,395
It was written during
the Bicentennial
720
00:31:42,480 --> 00:31:44,998
to celebrate America
and fireworks...
721
00:31:45,065 --> 00:31:47,767
No, it's about sneaking
out for a nooner.
722
00:31:47,852 --> 00:31:49,152
Yes. Exactly!
723
00:31:49,219 --> 00:31:51,187
A nooner's when you have
dessert in the middle
724
00:31:51,238 --> 00:31:52,589
of the day, right?
725
00:31:52,656 --> 00:31:54,340
Right, Carl?
726
00:31:54,408 --> 00:31:55,492
Well, regardless...
727
00:31:55,559 --> 00:31:57,076
It was a great job, guys.
Great number.
728
00:31:57,161 --> 00:31:59,445
It was...
It was fantastic.
729
00:31:59,530 --> 00:32:00,663
Hey, Glee Club, let's go.
730
00:32:00,731 --> 00:32:01,998
Miss Holliday?
Excuse me a second.
731
00:32:02,065 --> 00:32:03,733
Miss Holliday?
732
00:32:03,784 --> 00:32:05,168
You're still the, um...
733
00:32:05,235 --> 00:32:06,369
You're still the acting
sex-ed teacher, right?
734
00:32:06,420 --> 00:32:08,204
You know it, brother.
735
00:32:08,255 --> 00:32:11,040
Uh, you don't happen to have
any office hours, do you?
736
00:32:11,091 --> 00:32:12,675
- Sure.
- Afternoon Delight is a dessert.
737
00:32:12,743 --> 00:32:15,044
It's made with coconut
and pineapple
738
00:32:15,095 --> 00:32:16,262
and marshmallow fluff.
739
00:32:16,347 --> 00:32:18,264
I think Emma and I
need an appointment.
740
00:32:21,638 --> 00:32:22,972
What are those?
741
00:32:23,056 --> 00:32:25,841
Those are some pamphlets
that I picked up from the free clinic.
742
00:32:25,926 --> 00:32:27,760
I thought it might
help the process along,
743
00:32:27,811 --> 00:32:29,795
because it is time you
and I had "the talk."
744
00:32:29,846 --> 00:32:31,764
- No, it's not.
- Yes, it is.
745
00:32:31,815 --> 00:32:33,349
- You told me to educate myself.
- La, la, la!
746
00:32:33,433 --> 00:32:35,234
- La, la, la!
- Hey, you think this is easy for me?
747
00:32:35,301 --> 00:32:36,602
- La, la, la, la!
- Okay, believe me,
748
00:32:36,653 --> 00:32:38,404
I want to do this even
less than you do.
749
00:32:38,471 --> 00:32:40,472
This is going to suck
for both of us,
750
00:32:40,524 --> 00:32:42,825
but we are going
to get through it together,
751
00:32:42,909 --> 00:32:44,827
and we will both be
better men because of it.
752
00:32:46,997 --> 00:32:49,165
Now, first, most of the, um...
753
00:32:49,249 --> 00:32:51,917
mechanics of what you're going
754
00:32:51,985 --> 00:32:54,036
to be doing is covered
in the pamphlets.
755
00:32:54,121 --> 00:32:58,323
Okay, so, I want you to read them,
and then I want you to come talk
756
00:32:58,375 --> 00:32:59,992
to me about it.
757
00:33:00,043 --> 00:33:02,011
Deal?
758
00:33:02,095 --> 00:33:03,763
Okay.
759
00:33:03,830 --> 00:33:05,965
All right. Now.
Hey, sit down.
760
00:33:06,016 --> 00:33:07,516
We're just getting started.
761
00:33:07,601 --> 00:33:08,801
All right.
762
00:33:08,852 --> 00:33:11,103
You know, for most guys,
sex is just... You know...
763
00:33:11,171 --> 00:33:12,471
It's this thing
we always want to do.
764
00:33:12,522 --> 00:33:14,190
You know, it's fun.
765
00:33:14,274 --> 00:33:15,608
It feels great.
766
00:33:15,675 --> 00:33:17,643
But we're not really thinking
too much about, you know,
767
00:33:17,694 --> 00:33:21,313
how it makes us feel on
the inside or, you know,
768
00:33:21,364 --> 00:33:23,866
how the other person
feels about it.
769
00:33:23,950 --> 00:33:25,568
Women are different?
770
00:33:25,652 --> 00:33:28,537
Only because they get that
it's about something more
771
00:33:28,622 --> 00:33:30,823
than just the physical.
772
00:33:30,874 --> 00:33:33,959
You know, when... When you're
intimate with somebody
773
00:33:34,027 --> 00:33:37,913
in that way,
you're exposing yourself.
774
00:33:37,998 --> 00:33:41,000
You know, you're never going
to be more vulnerable,
775
00:33:41,051 --> 00:33:43,469
and that scares the hell
out of a lot of guys.
776
00:33:43,536 --> 00:33:47,056
Believe me, I can't tell
you how many buddies I've got
777
00:33:47,140 --> 00:33:50,292
who have gotten in
way too deep with a girl
778
00:33:50,360 --> 00:33:52,711
who said she was cool
with just hooking up.
779
00:33:52,763 --> 00:33:54,430
But that's not going
to happen to me, Dad.
780
00:33:54,514 --> 00:33:56,232
No. It's going to be worse.
781
00:33:56,316 --> 00:33:57,883
Okay? Because it's two guys.
782
00:33:57,934 --> 00:33:59,301
With two guys,
783
00:33:59,369 --> 00:34:02,855
you've got two people
who think that sex is just sex.
784
00:34:02,906 --> 00:34:04,907
It's gonna be
easier to come by.
785
00:34:04,991 --> 00:34:06,025
And once you start
doing this stuff,
786
00:34:06,076 --> 00:34:07,392
you're not going
to want to stop.
787
00:34:07,444 --> 00:34:09,445
You just... You've got to know
that it means something.
788
00:34:09,529 --> 00:34:12,915
You know,
it's doing something to you,
789
00:34:12,999 --> 00:34:16,452
to your heart,
to your self-esteem,
790
00:34:16,536 --> 00:34:19,338
even though it feels like
you're just having fun.
791
00:34:19,405 --> 00:34:22,858
So, you're saying I
shouldn't have sex?
792
00:34:22,926 --> 00:34:27,279
I think on your thirtieth birthday,
it is a great gift to yourself.
793
00:34:29,099 --> 00:34:31,083
Kurt...
794
00:34:31,134 --> 00:34:34,270
When you're ready...
795
00:34:34,354 --> 00:34:38,724
I want you to be able to...
796
00:34:38,775 --> 00:34:40,776
Do everything.
797
00:34:40,844 --> 00:34:42,862
But when you're ready,
I want you
798
00:34:42,929 --> 00:34:47,633
to use it as a way
to connect to another person.
799
00:34:47,701 --> 00:34:49,601
Don't throw yourself around
800
00:34:49,653 --> 00:34:51,654
like you don't matter.
801
00:34:51,738 --> 00:34:55,191
'Cause you matter, Kurt.
802
00:34:58,795 --> 00:35:00,779
Is that it?
803
00:35:00,831 --> 00:35:03,115
That's it. For now.
804
00:35:03,166 --> 00:35:04,583
Can I make you some toast?
805
00:35:04,634 --> 00:35:06,669
I think I'll take
it up to my room
806
00:35:06,753 --> 00:35:09,839
to eat while I look
over my new pamphlets.
807
00:35:12,676 --> 00:35:16,061
- Thank you, Dad.
- You're welcome.
808
00:35:24,688 --> 00:35:26,689
Now, I hear you guys are
having some problems.
809
00:35:26,773 --> 00:35:28,190
- I wouldn't call them problems.
- No, we are.
810
00:35:28,275 --> 00:35:29,525
We really, really are.
We're having problems.
811
00:35:29,609 --> 00:35:31,577
When is the last time
that you...
812
00:35:31,644 --> 00:35:33,712
- Never.
- I beg your pardon?
813
00:35:33,780 --> 00:35:35,447
We've been married four months
814
00:35:35,498 --> 00:35:36,815
and we still haven't
done the deed.
815
00:35:36,867 --> 00:35:38,784
Girlfriend,
what is up with that?
816
00:35:38,835 --> 00:35:40,169
He's hot!
817
00:35:40,253 --> 00:35:41,871
You're thirty.
818
00:35:41,955 --> 00:35:43,455
I haven't felt comfortable.
819
00:35:43,506 --> 00:35:46,842
- So...
- Well, what is it that you do?
820
00:35:46,927 --> 00:35:49,261
Um, okay...
821
00:35:49,329 --> 00:35:50,495
So we cuddle a lot.
822
00:35:50,547 --> 00:35:51,547
- A lot.
- A lot.
823
00:35:51,631 --> 00:35:52,831
- We cuddle too much.
- Oh, well, no...
824
00:35:52,883 --> 00:35:54,283
- We're... We're cuddle monsters.
- Okay. Okay.
825
00:35:54,351 --> 00:35:56,001
We... We watch
the Housewives shows,
826
00:35:56,052 --> 00:35:57,269
which are so, so racy. Racy!
827
00:35:57,337 --> 00:35:58,888
It's not like I haven't tried.
I try.
828
00:35:58,955 --> 00:35:59,855
I've made her romantic dinners.
829
00:35:59,940 --> 00:36:01,056
I give her roses,
830
00:36:01,141 --> 00:36:02,641
and every time I try
to touch her...
831
00:36:02,692 --> 00:36:04,693
That happens.
832
00:36:04,778 --> 00:36:06,812
I'm so sorry.
833
00:36:06,863 --> 00:36:09,698
Okay, look.
I am not a doctor, okay?
834
00:36:09,783 --> 00:36:11,367
I don't even
like doctor TV shows.
835
00:36:11,451 --> 00:36:14,519
Unless it's one of those ones
where people strap bombs
836
00:36:14,571 --> 00:36:16,989
to their chest.
Love those.
837
00:36:17,040 --> 00:36:20,492
So I would like
to ask you a question,
838
00:36:20,543 --> 00:36:24,413
and I want you to answer it
very seriously.
839
00:36:24,481 --> 00:36:28,033
Are you still in love
with Will Schuester?
840
00:36:28,084 --> 00:36:29,902
You know, I was sort
of thinking the same thing,
841
00:36:29,970 --> 00:36:32,537
but I was afraid to ask it.
842
00:36:32,589 --> 00:36:33,989
- Um...
- Are you?
843
00:36:36,009 --> 00:36:40,596
I feel very confused
about my feelings.
844
00:36:40,664 --> 00:36:42,598
- Okay.
- I'm sorry.
845
00:36:42,682 --> 00:36:44,600
No, you and your feelings
can stay at the condo,
846
00:36:44,668 --> 00:36:46,151
and I'll be at the Radisson.
847
00:36:46,219 --> 00:36:48,070
Thank you, Doctor.
848
00:36:50,991 --> 00:36:52,491
Not a doctor.
849
00:36:54,060 --> 00:36:57,947
Could you please,
please not tell Will about this?
850
00:36:58,031 --> 00:37:00,532
- No, of course not. Of course not.
- Okay.
851
00:37:00,583 --> 00:37:02,918
- My lips are sealed.
- Okay, thank you.
852
00:37:03,003 --> 00:37:05,087
Just like your legs!
853
00:37:05,171 --> 00:37:06,505
Oh. Ha. Kidding!
854
00:37:06,572 --> 00:37:07,840
God. That was rude.
855
00:37:07,907 --> 00:37:09,908
Why did I say that?
856
00:37:09,960 --> 00:37:12,094
See, a real doctor would
never have said that.
857
00:37:12,178 --> 00:37:14,096
Whew.
858
00:37:17,434 --> 00:37:19,935
- Hi.
- Hey.
859
00:37:20,020 --> 00:37:21,920
- Can we talk?
- But we never do that.
860
00:37:21,972 --> 00:37:24,640
I know, but, um,
I wanted to thank you...
861
00:37:24,724 --> 00:37:27,426
for performing that song
with me in Glee Club.
862
00:37:27,477 --> 00:37:28,610
Yeah.
863
00:37:28,695 --> 00:37:31,763
'Cause it's made me do
a lot of thinking.
864
00:37:31,815 --> 00:37:38,437
What I've realized is why
I'm such a bitch all the time.
865
00:37:38,488 --> 00:37:41,824
I'm a bitch because I'm angry.
866
00:37:41,891 --> 00:37:45,527
I'm angry because I have
all of these feelings...
867
00:37:45,595 --> 00:37:50,215
Feelings for you...
that I'm afraid of dealing with,
868
00:37:50,283 --> 00:37:54,386
because I'm afraid of dealing
with the consequences.
869
00:37:54,454 --> 00:37:56,055
And Brittany,
870
00:37:56,122 --> 00:37:59,341
I can't go to an Indigo Girls
concert. I just can't.
871
00:37:59,426 --> 00:38:00,726
I understand that.
872
00:38:00,793 --> 00:38:05,164
Do you understand what
I'm trying to say here?
873
00:38:05,231 --> 00:38:07,950
Not really.
874
00:38:11,137 --> 00:38:14,957
I want to be with you.
875
00:38:15,025 --> 00:38:18,810
But I'm afraid of the talks,
and the looks.
876
00:38:18,862 --> 00:38:21,480
I mean, you know what happened
to Kurt at this school.
877
00:38:21,531 --> 00:38:26,318
But, honey... If anybody were
to ever make fun of you,
878
00:38:26,369 --> 00:38:28,253
you would either kick their ass
879
00:38:28,321 --> 00:38:30,422
or slash them with your vicious,
vicious words.
880
00:38:30,490 --> 00:38:34,126
Yeah, I know. But...
881
00:38:34,177 --> 00:38:36,845
I'm so afraid of what everyone
will say behind my back.
882
00:38:36,930 --> 00:38:39,498
Still, I have to accept...
883
00:38:39,549 --> 00:38:42,084
that I love you.
884
00:38:44,003 --> 00:38:45,170
I love you.
885
00:38:45,221 --> 00:38:47,639
And I don't want to
be with Sam or Finn
886
00:38:47,690 --> 00:38:50,442
or any of those other guys.
887
00:38:50,510 --> 00:38:51,977
I just want you.
888
00:38:53,780 --> 00:38:56,698
Please say you love me back.
889
00:38:56,766 --> 00:39:01,203
- Please...
- Of course I love you. I do.
890
00:39:01,287 --> 00:39:03,405
And I would totally
be with you,
891
00:39:03,490 --> 00:39:04,723
if it weren't for Artie.
892
00:39:04,791 --> 00:39:06,825
Artie?
893
00:39:06,876 --> 00:39:09,995
I love him, too.
894
00:39:10,046 --> 00:39:12,164
I don't want to hurt him,
that's not right.
895
00:39:12,215 --> 00:39:13,665
I can't break up with him.
896
00:39:13,716 --> 00:39:16,585
Yes, you can.
He's just a stupid boy.
897
00:39:16,669 --> 00:39:18,170
But it wouldn't be right.
898
00:39:18,221 --> 00:39:20,556
Santana, you have to know...
899
00:39:20,640 --> 00:39:24,510
If Artie and I were
to ever break up,
900
00:39:24,561 --> 00:39:26,812
and I'm lucky enough
that you're still single...
901
00:39:26,879 --> 00:39:29,565
Don't.
902
00:39:29,632 --> 00:39:32,901
I am so yours.
903
00:39:32,986 --> 00:39:35,554
Proudly so.
904
00:39:35,605 --> 00:39:38,157
Yeah, wow.
905
00:39:38,224 --> 00:39:42,227
Whoever thought that being fluid
meant you could be so stuck?
906
00:39:42,278 --> 00:39:44,496
I'm sorry.
Don't...
907
00:39:44,564 --> 00:39:47,166
- Get off me.
- I'm sorry.
908
00:39:54,291 --> 00:39:56,008
Nerd.
909
00:39:56,093 --> 00:39:58,127
Whoa! Why you gotta hate?
910
00:39:58,178 --> 00:40:00,596
You joined the Celibacy Club?
911
00:40:00,647 --> 00:40:02,682
What the hell?
912
00:40:02,766 --> 00:40:04,317
I thought you and me
were an item. Lauren.
913
00:40:04,401 --> 00:40:07,653
Stop. I need to talk
to you about something.
914
00:40:07,738 --> 00:40:08,821
I realized something lately.
915
00:40:08,906 --> 00:40:10,273
I do a lot of stupid things.
916
00:40:10,324 --> 00:40:12,475
Once, on a dare,
I swallowed a thumbtack.
917
00:40:12,526 --> 00:40:14,077
I'm about 90% sure
it's still in there.
918
00:40:14,144 --> 00:40:15,644
I don't think about
consequences.
919
00:40:15,696 --> 00:40:18,197
And while I used to
think that made me cool,
920
00:40:18,282 --> 00:40:20,116
now I just think it
makes me a loser.
921
00:40:20,167 --> 00:40:23,119
I like you, Lauren.
I like wooing you.
922
00:40:23,170 --> 00:40:24,420
Next to dropping
my afternoon deuce,
923
00:40:24,488 --> 00:40:25,705
it's my favorite
part of the day.
924
00:40:25,789 --> 00:40:27,656
So I'm making a change.
925
00:40:27,708 --> 00:40:30,159
And if that makes
me a nerd, fine.
926
00:40:30,210 --> 00:40:32,712
I really do have
the urge to punch you.
927
00:40:37,851 --> 00:40:41,687
If we can play footsie
in Celibacy Club, I'm in.
928
00:40:41,772 --> 00:40:43,639
Nerd.
929
00:40:49,196 --> 00:40:51,364
I hereby call the Celibacy Club
to order.
930
00:40:51,448 --> 00:40:53,149
Where's Ms. Pillsbury?
931
00:40:53,200 --> 00:40:55,151
She decided to take
the hour she was spending here
932
00:40:55,202 --> 00:40:57,036
to use it to fix her
sham of a marriage.
933
00:40:57,121 --> 00:40:58,488
In the interim,
I'll be taking over.
934
00:40:58,539 --> 00:40:59,956
Because you annoyingly
take over everything?
935
00:41:00,023 --> 00:41:02,792
Because I realized that
936
00:41:02,859 --> 00:41:05,495
while all of us making our
celibacy pledge is wonderful,
937
00:41:05,546 --> 00:41:08,214
one day we're going to
fall in love with someone,
938
00:41:08,298 --> 00:41:10,550
and we're going to choose
to be intimate with them.
939
00:41:10,634 --> 00:41:13,052
Speaking of being intimate...
What's with the hickey, Quinn?
940
00:41:13,137 --> 00:41:14,637
It's not a hickey.
941
00:41:14,704 --> 00:41:17,473
Oh, I know hickeys.
I'm a freakin' connoisseur.
942
00:41:17,541 --> 00:41:19,708
I can make them into shapes,
like balloon animals.
943
00:41:19,760 --> 00:41:22,645
I burnt myself this
morning with a curling iron.
944
00:41:22,712 --> 00:41:24,847
The key is to use the
curling iron in the bathtub
945
00:41:24,898 --> 00:41:26,098
to keep you from getting burnt.
946
00:41:26,183 --> 00:41:27,517
No.
947
00:41:27,568 --> 00:41:30,169
I was sure I was caught.
948
00:41:32,139 --> 00:41:33,222
What was that?
949
00:41:33,273 --> 00:41:35,525
Is that your mom?
950
00:41:35,576 --> 00:41:38,945
She's at work.
She won't be home for hours.
951
00:41:39,029 --> 00:41:41,030
Divorce rules.
952
00:41:41,081 --> 00:41:42,999
Come here.
953
00:41:46,403 --> 00:41:48,404
Ooh!
954
00:41:48,455 --> 00:41:50,756
I'll be more careful with the
hickey placement next time.
955
00:41:50,841 --> 00:41:52,158
This is so awesome.
956
00:41:52,226 --> 00:41:54,677
We have two months until Prom,
so we have plenty of time
957
00:41:54,745 --> 00:41:56,379
to campaign for
Prom King and Queen.
958
00:41:56,430 --> 00:41:59,632
But that's not all this is about,
though, right?
959
00:41:59,700 --> 00:42:03,352
Look, I made a mistake
with Puck.
960
00:42:03,420 --> 00:42:06,205
You should have been my first.
961
00:42:09,726 --> 00:42:11,644
This is where I belong.
962
00:42:11,712 --> 00:42:16,866
- With you. Okay?
- Okay.
963
00:42:18,402 --> 00:42:19,986
Hey, hot stuff.
964
00:42:20,070 --> 00:42:22,822
Holly. Hey.
965
00:42:22,906 --> 00:42:24,490
I'm just, uh, walking through
some choreography.
966
00:42:24,575 --> 00:42:26,959
Got Regionals in a week,
and I just want to make sure
967
00:42:27,044 --> 00:42:29,295
all the dances are what
I like to call "Finn-proof."
968
00:42:29,379 --> 00:42:32,048
Oh, well, I won't keep you.
969
00:42:32,115 --> 00:42:34,600
I just, um,
just came to say good-bye.
970
00:42:34,668 --> 00:42:37,803
I'm going over to Shawnee
Township to teach algebra.
971
00:42:37,888 --> 00:42:39,639
Really?
972
00:42:39,723 --> 00:42:43,792
Yeah. There were some
parent complaints.
973
00:42:43,844 --> 00:42:45,978
Apparently, my cucumber
demonstration
974
00:42:46,063 --> 00:42:48,464
made it impossible
to watch VeggieTales
975
00:42:48,515 --> 00:42:49,899
the same way ever again.
976
00:42:49,966 --> 00:42:53,402
I personally thought it made
watching that show hilarious.
977
00:42:53,470 --> 00:42:56,656
Uh, wow, I...
978
00:42:56,740 --> 00:42:59,475
I really don't want
to say good-bye.
979
00:43:01,645 --> 00:43:04,330
Then maybe we shouldn't.
980
00:43:04,414 --> 00:43:07,116
Teaching Santana and Brittany
how to get their Stevie Nicks on
981
00:43:07,184 --> 00:43:11,370
made me realize how
closed off I've been.
982
00:43:11,455 --> 00:43:13,506
I'm getting older, too.
Maybe I should try
983
00:43:13,590 --> 00:43:17,076
a relationship that lasts
more than thirty-six hours.
984
00:43:18,262 --> 00:43:20,346
You're serious?
985
00:43:20,430 --> 00:43:22,298
Plus, seeing another woman
with the hots for you
986
00:43:22,349 --> 00:43:23,966
kinda made me jealous...
987
00:43:24,017 --> 00:43:26,135
- Wait, what?
- Oh, nothing.
988
00:43:27,504 --> 00:43:30,339
I know a lot about sex,
Will, but...
989
00:43:30,390 --> 00:43:33,809
Maybe it's time I learned a
little something about romance.
990
00:43:37,197 --> 00:43:40,483
Well, I don't know
if you've heard...
991
00:43:42,703 --> 00:43:45,321
But I happen to be
an excellent educator.
992
00:43:45,372 --> 00:43:49,375
Synced By YesCool
Corrected by icephoenix
www.addic7ed.com