1
00:00:01,584 --> 00:00:03,920
La cucaracha!
2
00:00:04,086 --> 00:00:07,424
Oh, oh!
La cucaracha, la cucaracha
3
00:00:07,590 --> 00:00:09,134
Hey! Hey!
4
00:00:09,300 --> 00:00:11,511
Ya no puede caminar
5
00:00:11,677 --> 00:00:13,513
Porque le falta
6
00:00:13,679 --> 00:00:15,098
Porque le falta
7
00:00:15,264 --> 00:00:16,079
Hey! Hey!
8
00:00:16,204 --> 00:00:18,060
Marihuana que fumar
9
00:00:18,226 --> 00:00:20,312
Yo estoy harto de que me digan...
10
00:00:20,478 --> 00:00:23,174
WILL: I should have known
by the looks on my students' faces
11
00:00:23,299 --> 00:00:24,858
that I'd really stepped in it.
12
00:00:25,024 --> 00:00:27,762
My yearly rendition of
"La Cucaracha"on Taco Tuesday
13
00:00:27,887 --> 00:00:29,404
used to be such a hit.
14
00:00:29,570 --> 00:00:31,498
The truth is, I'm ashamed.
15
00:00:31,623 --> 00:00:33,450
To be a teacher is to offer students
16
00:00:33,616 --> 00:00:35,285
a gateway to the future,
and I blew it.
17
00:00:35,511 --> 00:00:37,496
How could I have
become so out of touch?
18
00:00:37,662 --> 00:00:39,440
(school bell ringing)
19
00:00:39,565 --> 00:00:40,608
William...
20
00:00:40,733 --> 00:00:42,009
What do you mean,
you received complaints?
21
00:00:42,134 --> 00:00:44,178
- Who complained?
- I can't tell you that.
22
00:00:44,303 --> 00:00:46,897
But I can tell you that
your teaching skills
23
00:00:47,022 --> 00:00:49,317
have been seriously
brought into question.
24
00:00:49,442 --> 00:00:51,485
Look, I-I know I'm not
a native Spanish speaker.
25
00:00:51,610 --> 00:00:53,537
- Sometimes I get a little tripped up...
- William.
26
00:00:53,662 --> 00:00:55,539
Will you please remove
that enormous sombrero
27
00:00:55,664 --> 00:00:57,391
so I can break it down for you.
28
00:00:58,589 --> 00:01:01,144
As you may have heard,
our history teacher, Mrs. Hagberg,
29
00:01:01,310 --> 00:01:03,271
has been forced into retirement
30
00:01:03,437 --> 00:01:04,690
due to some memory problems.
31
00:01:05,147 --> 00:01:09,069
And that's how Germany
won the Second World War.
32
00:01:09,512 --> 00:01:11,780
Hagberg was a tenured
teacher at this school
33
00:01:11,946 --> 00:01:13,156
for over 40 years.
34
00:01:13,432 --> 00:01:16,894
Her departure means there's
an open tenured position
35
00:01:17,019 --> 00:01:18,161
here at McKinley.
36
00:01:18,327 --> 00:01:20,231
Oh, Principal Figgins...
37
00:01:20,356 --> 00:01:21,715
Emma and I just got engaged.
38
00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:24,000
We'll be starting a family soon.
I need that tenure.
39
00:01:24,166 --> 00:01:26,336
And I would love
to give it to you, William.
40
00:01:26,502 --> 00:01:28,356
But you're only one
of several teachers
41
00:01:28,481 --> 00:01:30,549
I'm considering for this position.
42
00:01:30,715 --> 00:01:33,135
And to be frank, you have
a public relations problem.
43
00:01:33,301 --> 00:01:34,761
If you want the tenure,
44
00:01:34,927 --> 00:01:36,096
you've got to turn it
around in the class.
45
00:01:36,262 --> 00:01:38,014
O-Okay.
How do I do that?
46
00:01:38,180 --> 00:01:39,233
You're a Spanish teacher.
47
00:01:39,358 --> 00:01:41,226
Maybe you should try
learning Spanish.
48
00:01:42,476 --> 00:01:45,313
Sync and correction by Mlmlte
www.addic7ed.com
49
00:01:45,479 --> 00:01:46,398
(school bell ringing)
50
00:01:46,564 --> 00:01:47,649
Señor Martinez?
51
00:01:49,421 --> 00:01:51,027
You can call me David.
52
00:01:51,193 --> 00:01:52,346
David, I am thrilled
53
00:01:52,471 --> 00:01:54,614
that Spanish has so many
different ways to say
54
00:01:54,780 --> 00:01:57,802
"to be," but right now
what I need to do
55
00:01:57,927 --> 00:01:59,920
is to learn how to say,
56
00:02:00,045 --> 00:02:02,789
"Stop using my toilet," to my maid.
57
00:02:02,955 --> 00:02:05,667
I was hoping you could tell me
what the word "gordita" means.
58
00:02:05,833 --> 00:02:08,211
I know we're all here
for different reasons.
59
00:02:08,377 --> 00:02:09,814
Most of you need your GEDs,
60
00:02:09,939 --> 00:02:11,840
some of you want to
go to Cabo San Lucas
61
00:02:12,006 --> 00:02:13,341
and order like a local.
62
00:02:13,507 --> 00:02:16,386
But did you know that the U.S.
census believe that by 2030
63
00:02:16,552 --> 00:02:18,805
the majority of Americans
will use Spanish
64
00:02:18,971 --> 00:02:20,324
as their first language?
65
00:02:20,449 --> 00:02:22,276
You're not here learning a language.
66
00:02:22,401 --> 00:02:25,446
You're here 'cause you're smart.
And you're forward thinkers.
67
00:02:25,571 --> 00:02:28,148
I'm sorry. I'm trying to listen,
but you got some beautiful teeth.
68
00:02:28,314 --> 00:02:29,315
(chuckles)
69
00:02:38,917 --> 00:02:41,041
Asi que repiten conmigo.
Come on, repeat with me.
70
00:02:51,212 --> 00:02:52,380
(school bell rings)
71
00:02:52,546 --> 00:02:53,840
DAVID:
Very good. Thank you so much.
72
00:02:54,006 --> 00:02:55,826
Remember, roll those "R"s.
(rolling "R"s)
73
00:02:55,951 --> 00:02:57,803
(rolling "R"s)
Exactly.
74
00:02:57,969 --> 00:02:58,812
Hey, I'm Will Schuester.
75
00:02:58,937 --> 00:03:01,115
I teach Spanish here during the day.
76
00:03:01,240 --> 00:03:03,433
Can I buy you a cup of café?
77
00:03:03,599 --> 00:03:04,643
(laughing):
Sure.
78
00:03:04,809 --> 00:03:07,562
There's something kind of fun and
rebellious about being here at night.
79
00:03:07,728 --> 00:03:08,772
It's depressing.
80
00:03:09,647 --> 00:03:11,375
- No offense.
- No. No, um...
81
00:03:11,500 --> 00:03:13,568
Why don't you get a job
teaching regular high school?
82
00:03:13,734 --> 00:03:15,529
Have you seen the news?
Budgets are being cut,
83
00:03:15,695 --> 00:03:17,155
there's a hiring freeze...
84
00:03:22,368 --> 00:03:24,412
You know, could you maybe
say that a little slower?
85
00:03:24,578 --> 00:03:26,140
I think your accent's
throwing me off.
86
00:03:26,265 --> 00:03:27,601
- Where you from?
- Ohio.
87
00:03:27,869 --> 00:03:29,393
But my parents are from Chile,
88
00:03:29,518 --> 00:03:31,253
and we only spoke Spanish
in the house, growing up.
89
00:03:31,419 --> 00:03:32,680
Oh.
90
00:03:32,805 --> 00:03:34,756
How-how long have you been,
uh, working here?
91
00:03:34,922 --> 00:03:36,617
Just a few months.
This is...
92
00:03:36,742 --> 00:03:38,702
actually the beginning
of my career change.
93
00:03:38,827 --> 00:03:41,429
For the last six years,
I was a tooth model.
94
00:03:41,595 --> 00:03:44,391
It's like a hand model,
but with your teeth.
95
00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:46,434
Man, your teeth are really white.
96
00:03:46,600 --> 00:03:49,354
Yeah, no coffee,
no cigarettes, no beets.
97
00:03:49,520 --> 00:03:50,798
I was the top tooth model
in the country.
98
00:03:50,923 --> 00:03:53,334
Colgate, Crest Whitestrips,
Sensodyne...
99
00:03:53,459 --> 00:03:54,568
Whenever they needed a smile
for their advertisement,
100
00:03:54,734 --> 00:03:56,278
they would call on Dave Martinez.
101
00:03:56,444 --> 00:03:58,222
Wow, that sounds like a great gig.
102
00:03:58,347 --> 00:04:00,090
What... why'd you stop?
103
00:04:00,364 --> 00:04:01,475
Well, one day I...
104
00:04:01,600 --> 00:04:04,094
I realized I was spending
so much time flossing, I...
105
00:04:04,219 --> 00:04:06,454
I was missing my life.
I want to make a difference
106
00:04:06,620 --> 00:04:07,914
that lasts longer
than a grin, you know?
107
00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:10,384
I-I want to teach kids.
108
00:04:10,509 --> 00:04:13,070
I want to give them something useful.
109
00:04:13,195 --> 00:04:15,630
Something they can...
they can take with them
110
00:04:15,796 --> 00:04:16,923
their whole lives.
111
00:04:17,089 --> 00:04:18,425
I want to help them
find their duende.
112
00:04:18,591 --> 00:04:20,778
- You know duende, right?
- Of course.
113
00:04:20,903 --> 00:04:22,496
Duende, yeah.
114
00:04:22,621 --> 00:04:24,398
Now, you also teach Glee Club, right?
115
00:04:24,523 --> 00:04:26,683
- I do.
- You see, that's... that's inspiring.
116
00:04:26,849 --> 00:04:29,587
I actually wanted to try forming
the night school Glee Club,
117
00:04:29,712 --> 00:04:31,688
but meeting after school
means 2:00 in the morning.
118
00:04:31,854 --> 00:04:33,732
- Ah, right.
- (laughs) I love to sing.
119
00:04:34,380 --> 00:04:37,527
I actually learned English
watching reruns of Solid Gold.
120
00:04:37,693 --> 00:04:38,612
Wait. You're serious?
121
00:04:38,778 --> 00:04:40,247
Yeah. They-they've done
studies on it.
122
00:04:40,372 --> 00:04:42,933
The brain takes in information,
like a new language,
123
00:04:43,058 --> 00:04:45,586
or a math equation, much more quickly
124
00:04:45,711 --> 00:04:47,579
and retains it better,
when that information
125
00:04:47,745 --> 00:04:49,089
is delivered through music.
126
00:04:49,214 --> 00:04:52,500
Well, there's a lot
of duende involved, too.
127
00:04:53,918 --> 00:04:55,587
You know what I would do
if I was teaching Glee Club?
128
00:04:55,753 --> 00:04:57,422
Latin music. Think about it.
129
00:04:57,588 --> 00:04:59,132
You get those kids
singing in Spanish,
130
00:04:59,298 --> 00:05:00,367
and they'll be learning the language
131
00:05:00,492 --> 00:05:02,369
without even realizing it.
132
00:05:02,494 --> 00:05:04,989
WILL: If I could have some
of my Glee kids speaking Spanish
133
00:05:05,114 --> 00:05:07,675
by the end of the week,
it'd be a hell of an accomplishment.
134
00:05:07,800 --> 00:05:10,018
That's Teacher of the Year stuff.
135
00:05:10,184 --> 00:05:12,228
Twice a day, you boys stain
136
00:05:12,394 --> 00:05:14,940
your mother's drapes,
or befoul a gym sock
137
00:05:15,106 --> 00:05:16,775
that has to jump from the hamper
straight into therapy.
138
00:05:17,042 --> 00:05:18,752
SUE: Why not head on
down to the clinic,
139
00:05:18,877 --> 00:05:21,279
and put your virile
teen years to good use?
140
00:05:21,445 --> 00:05:23,123
You'll have five bucks more
than when you walked in,
141
00:05:23,248 --> 00:05:25,992
and the gratitude of
lonely ovaries everywhere.
142
00:05:26,158 --> 00:05:26,952
But not you.
143
00:05:27,118 --> 00:05:28,954
You can keep tossing your tissues
into the trash.
144
00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:30,080
I was in an accident.
145
00:05:30,246 --> 00:05:32,499
Still.
Same goes for you, Porcelain.
146
00:05:32,665 --> 00:05:34,584
Let the strangeness end with you.
147
00:05:34,750 --> 00:05:36,753
What's going on, Sue?
148
00:05:37,707 --> 00:05:39,714
Well, William,
I'm just trying to instill
149
00:05:39,880 --> 00:05:41,591
the spirit of giving
in your students.
150
00:05:41,757 --> 00:05:44,161
No, honestly, I, uh...
151
00:05:44,286 --> 00:05:47,331
was a little bit dismayed
by the quality of men
152
00:05:47,456 --> 00:05:49,516
holding Dixie cups
down at the sperm bank
153
00:05:49,682 --> 00:05:50,934
this morning.
154
00:05:51,100 --> 00:05:52,286
Zero viable options.
155
00:05:52,411 --> 00:05:54,688
Looked like the cast
from Ice Road Truckers.
156
00:05:54,854 --> 00:05:57,691
So I thought it'd be best
if I found a sperm donor here.
157
00:05:58,357 --> 00:06:00,026
H-Hold on a second.
You're serious?
158
00:06:00,192 --> 00:06:01,679
Yes, William.
159
00:06:01,804 --> 00:06:03,822
I have decided to have a child.
160
00:06:03,988 --> 00:06:05,473
(laughs)
161
00:06:07,032 --> 00:06:08,302
Um, wow.
162
00:06:08,427 --> 00:06:10,537
I guess I just never saw you
as the mothering type.
163
00:06:10,703 --> 00:06:12,273
Well, I resent that, William.
164
00:06:12,398 --> 00:06:14,416
I have a very strong
mothering instinct.
165
00:06:14,582 --> 00:06:16,167
I had it with my sister.
166
00:06:16,333 --> 00:06:17,645
I have it with Becky Jackson.
167
00:06:17,770 --> 00:06:20,981
I like to think I play
a parenting role in her life.
168
00:06:21,106 --> 00:06:24,818
And like so many women who
chose career over family,
169
00:06:24,943 --> 00:06:27,679
I've decided to take my life
in a different direction
170
00:06:27,845 --> 00:06:30,574
while there's still time.
171
00:06:30,699 --> 00:06:31,933
Are you sure that's even possible?
172
00:06:32,099 --> 00:06:34,161
Yes, William, I am sure.
173
00:06:34,286 --> 00:06:37,856
You see, I had my eggs
frozen in the late '70s.
174
00:06:38,022 --> 00:06:40,483
They didn't even have that
technology in the late '70s.
175
00:06:40,649 --> 00:06:42,944
I know.
I did it myself.
176
00:06:43,178 --> 00:06:46,281
The good people at Kroger
have been keeping a box
177
00:06:46,447 --> 00:06:48,058
of my championship ova
178
00:06:48,183 --> 00:06:49,534
cooling in their meat locker.
179
00:06:49,700 --> 00:06:50,952
And what with the financial security
180
00:06:51,118 --> 00:06:53,538
that will be afforded me
by the end of the week...
181
00:06:53,704 --> 00:06:55,832
I am finally ready
182
00:06:55,998 --> 00:06:58,185
to start a family.
183
00:06:58,310 --> 00:06:59,820
Now, I don't know if
you've heard, William,
184
00:06:59,945 --> 00:07:01,046
but there's a tenured position
185
00:07:01,212 --> 00:07:02,714
opening up at our school.
186
00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:05,091
- And I'm a shoe-in.
- Wait, wait, wait, wait.
187
00:07:05,257 --> 00:07:07,778
What makes you so sure you're
the one who's gonna get tenure?
188
00:07:08,052 --> 00:07:09,279
Seniority, William.
189
00:07:09,404 --> 00:07:11,639
I'm first in line, and also,
I'm a proven champion.
190
00:07:11,805 --> 00:07:15,669
And now seeing as how I find
bald infants terrifying,
191
00:07:15,794 --> 00:07:17,738
I'm going to need a few
ounces of your baby gravy
192
00:07:17,863 --> 00:07:20,648
to ensure Sue Sylvester Jr.
is born with a full head of hair.
193
00:07:20,814 --> 00:07:22,358
Coach?
194
00:07:22,524 --> 00:07:25,361
Principal Figgins wants
to see you in his office.
195
00:07:26,037 --> 00:07:28,766
Looks like I got my tenure.
196
00:07:28,891 --> 00:07:31,251
Cheerleading magazines
are right here.
197
00:07:31,376 --> 00:07:33,210
Have fun.
198
00:07:37,957 --> 00:07:39,443
Complaints?
199
00:07:39,568 --> 00:07:41,945
Who's complaining about
my teaching style?
200
00:07:42,211 --> 00:07:44,097
I can't tell you that, Sue.
201
00:07:44,222 --> 00:07:45,949
A student who shall remain anonymous.
202
00:07:46,215 --> 00:07:47,865
Well, then, who's this?
203
00:07:48,527 --> 00:07:50,595
Sue, this is the talented
and enchanting
204
00:07:50,761 --> 00:07:52,764
Olympian Roz Washington.
205
00:07:52,930 --> 00:07:53,973
Coach of the McKinley
206
00:07:54,139 --> 00:07:55,942
synchronized swimming team.
207
00:07:56,067 --> 00:07:58,311
Roz approached me with
some constructive criticism
208
00:07:58,477 --> 00:07:59,797
about your lagging Cheerios!
209
00:07:59,922 --> 00:08:01,281
Why should I listen to this woman
210
00:08:01,406 --> 00:08:02,649
give me notes
211
00:08:02,815 --> 00:08:03,942
about my Cheerios?
212
00:08:04,108 --> 00:08:06,152
Because Cheerios! didn't
win Nationals last year, Sue.
213
00:08:06,318 --> 00:08:09,364
And remember, you're on my short
list for the tenured position.
214
00:08:09,530 --> 00:08:11,241
And tenured teachers
are team players.
215
00:08:11,407 --> 00:08:13,868
Well, let me tell you
why ticket sales are down
216
00:08:14,034 --> 00:08:15,013
at sporting events.
217
00:08:15,138 --> 00:08:18,748
This school got cheerleaders
doing broke-ass moves from the 1950s.
218
00:08:18,914 --> 00:08:20,625
- Hm.
- Why don't you just admit
219
00:08:20,791 --> 00:08:23,187
that you're past
your competitive edge, Sue Sylvester,
220
00:08:23,312 --> 00:08:24,295
and let this young
221
00:08:24,461 --> 00:08:28,299
bronze-medal winner add some crunk
222
00:08:28,465 --> 00:08:30,201
to the ba-dunk-a-dunk?
223
00:08:32,594 --> 00:08:34,173
(school bell ringing)
224
00:08:34,298 --> 00:08:35,416
WILL:
All right, guys!
225
00:08:35,541 --> 00:08:36,808
Let me ask you something.
226
00:08:36,974 --> 00:08:39,978
Where do you think you'll
be in the year 2030?
227
00:08:40,144 --> 00:08:41,813
RACHEL & KURT:
Broadway. Twinsies!
228
00:08:41,979 --> 00:08:43,398
Walking.
229
00:08:43,564 --> 00:08:44,691
In jail, or dead. Or both.
230
00:08:44,857 --> 00:08:46,067
WILL:
Wherever you are,
231
00:08:46,233 --> 00:08:48,486
whatever you're doing, you're
going to need to be able
232
00:08:48,652 --> 00:08:49,529
to speak Spanish.
233
00:08:49,695 --> 00:08:52,240
The reality is, by 2030,
more people on this planet
234
00:08:52,558 --> 00:08:54,784
will be speaking Spanish
than any other language.
235
00:08:54,950 --> 00:08:56,786
The world is changing.
Our culture is changing.
236
00:08:56,952 --> 00:08:58,705
And that needs to be
reflected in here.
237
00:08:58,871 --> 00:09:00,373
So for our next assignment,
we're only doing songs
238
00:09:00,539 --> 00:09:04,228
written or performed by someone
Latin, or of Latin descent.
239
00:09:04,353 --> 00:09:06,153
Or English songs
performed bilingually.
240
00:09:06,420 --> 00:09:07,547
Ooh, I'm bilingual.
241
00:09:07,806 --> 00:09:10,067
, Mr. Shue, though I love
that we're finally getting
242
00:09:10,192 --> 00:09:12,927
all Lima Sound Machine
in here, why now?
243
00:09:13,093 --> 00:09:14,971
Oh, Santana,
because it's long overdue.
244
00:09:15,137 --> 00:09:17,865
The truth is,
I love all things Latin.
245
00:09:19,266 --> 00:09:20,268
I mean, I love Latin food,
246
00:09:20,434 --> 00:09:21,662
Latin art, Latin people...
247
00:09:21,787 --> 00:09:23,788
You don't know any Latin people.
(knocking)
248
00:09:29,985 --> 00:09:31,863
I know. Um...
Guys, this is David Martinez.
249
00:09:32,029 --> 00:09:32,947
David Martinez,
this is the Glee Club.
250
00:09:33,113 --> 00:09:33,990
RACHEL:
Oh, my God.
251
00:09:34,156 --> 00:09:35,491
- Cutest...
- smile...
252
00:09:35,657 --> 00:09:36,658
ever.
253
00:09:37,201 --> 00:09:39,346
Hello, everyone.
254
00:09:39,471 --> 00:09:40,413
It's a pleasure.
255
00:09:40,579 --> 00:09:41,915
WILL:
David here is one of my
256
00:09:42,081 --> 00:09:44,101
many Latin friends.
257
00:09:44,226 --> 00:09:46,436
And, uh, he's interested
in starting his own
258
00:09:46,561 --> 00:09:48,555
night school Glee Club, after hours.
259
00:09:48,680 --> 00:09:52,258
So, uh, I invited him to come
watch us get our duende on.
260
00:09:52,424 --> 00:09:53,551
Duende?
261
00:09:53,717 --> 00:09:55,053
It means "dwarf," you ass.
262
00:09:56,011 --> 00:09:57,639
Now I'm completely confused.
So what's the assignment?
263
00:09:57,856 --> 00:10:01,118
To sing, in Spanish, with duende.
264
00:10:01,243 --> 00:10:03,186
Which, yes, literally means "dwarf,"
265
00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:04,914
but metaphorically, it means
266
00:10:05,039 --> 00:10:07,007
to have Spanish soul.
267
00:10:07,132 --> 00:10:09,877
To be filled with Spanish passion.
268
00:10:10,002 --> 00:10:11,110
Will, can I...
269
00:10:11,369 --> 00:10:13,547
- Hablar con ellos?
- That's... right.
270
00:10:13,672 --> 00:10:16,866
A performance with duende
transforms you.
271
00:10:17,032 --> 00:10:20,745
Makes you sing, makes you cry,
makes you laugh.
272
00:10:20,911 --> 00:10:22,497
Makes you want to
kiss a person you love.
273
00:10:22,663 --> 00:10:25,333
A song sung in Spanish
must have duende,
274
00:10:25,499 --> 00:10:26,876
or else...
275
00:10:27,042 --> 00:10:29,254
- Would you mind showing us?
- Oh dear God, please, yes.
276
00:10:30,272 --> 00:10:31,589
Be my guest.
277
00:10:31,907 --> 00:10:34,592
Okay. Well, I'm-I'm not a
professional like you guys,
278
00:10:34,758 --> 00:10:36,552
- but I'll give it a go.
- All right.
279
00:10:36,718 --> 00:10:37,553
Now, guys, uh...
280
00:10:37,719 --> 00:10:40,123
remember, Mr. Martinez
is here as our guest, okay?
281
00:10:40,248 --> 00:10:42,725
Let's create a safe and
supportive environment.
282
00:10:42,891 --> 00:10:44,619
Uno, dos, tres, cuatro!
283
00:10:44,744 --> 00:10:46,813
(LMFAO's "Sexy and I Know It" begins)
284
00:10:46,979 --> 00:10:48,106
(kids whoop)
285
00:10:51,460 --> 00:10:52,402
Yeah!
286
00:10:52,568 --> 00:10:54,237
Yeah.
287
00:10:54,403 --> 00:10:55,672
Cuando salgo a andar
288
00:10:55,797 --> 00:10:57,824
The girls be looking, like,
"Ahi esta"
289
00:10:57,990 --> 00:10:59,292
Yo se I got it aqui
290
00:10:59,417 --> 00:11:01,119
Walking down the street
in my new La Freak, yeah
291
00:11:01,285 --> 00:11:02,829
This is how I roll
292
00:11:02,995 --> 00:11:04,956
Animal print pants,
fuera de control
293
00:11:05,122 --> 00:11:06,332
And check me out con mi big Afro
294
00:11:06,498 --> 00:11:08,668
Y como Bruce Lee, right,
got the glow, yo
295
00:11:08,834 --> 00:11:10,295
Girl, look at that body
296
00:11:10,461 --> 00:11:12,046
Girl, look at that body
297
00:11:12,212 --> 00:11:13,881
Girl, look at that body
298
00:11:14,047 --> 00:11:15,925
I-I-I work out
299
00:11:16,091 --> 00:11:17,911
Girl, look at that body
300
00:11:18,036 --> 00:11:19,429
Girl, look at that body
301
00:11:19,595 --> 00:11:21,806
Girl, look at that body
302
00:11:21,972 --> 00:11:22,983
I-I-I work out
303
00:11:23,108 --> 00:11:24,309
Cuando hago mi entrada
304
00:11:24,475 --> 00:11:26,086
- Yeah
- This is what I see
305
00:11:26,211 --> 00:11:27,228
Okay
306
00:11:27,445 --> 00:11:29,873
Todo el mundo para
pa'mirarme a mi
307
00:11:29,998 --> 00:11:31,733
I got passion in my pants
308
00:11:31,899 --> 00:11:34,094
And I ain't afraid to show it
309
00:11:34,219 --> 00:11:36,096
Show it, show it, show it
310
00:11:36,221 --> 00:11:39,623
I'm sexy and I know it
311
00:11:41,241 --> 00:11:43,870
(laughter, cheering)
312
00:11:44,036 --> 00:11:45,963
Soy sexy y lo sabes
313
00:11:52,503 --> 00:11:54,314
Yo, vacilón en el mall
314
00:11:54,439 --> 00:11:56,090
Security just can't fight them off
315
00:11:56,324 --> 00:11:58,760
Hanging out at the beach,
I'm in a G-stro
316
00:11:59,077 --> 00:12:00,370
- Trying to tan my cheeks
- What?
317
00:12:00,495 --> 00:12:01,763
This is how I roll
318
00:12:01,997 --> 00:12:03,457
Vamos, ladies, it's time to go
319
00:12:03,582 --> 00:12:05,224
Nos fuimos pa'el bar,
baby, go, look suave
320
00:12:05,450 --> 00:12:07,769
No shoes, no shirt,
como quiera me sirven, what?
321
00:12:07,935 --> 00:12:09,854
Girl, look at that body
322
00:12:10,020 --> 00:12:11,898
Girl, look at that body
323
00:12:12,064 --> 00:12:13,149
Girl, look at that body
324
00:12:13,315 --> 00:12:14,484
I-I-I work out
325
00:12:14,760 --> 00:12:16,861
- Cuando hago mi entrada
- Yeah
326
00:12:17,027 --> 00:12:18,488
- This is what I see
- Okay
327
00:12:19,112 --> 00:12:21,532
Todo el mundo para
pa'mirarme a mi
328
00:12:21,698 --> 00:12:23,844
I got passion in my pants
329
00:12:23,969 --> 00:12:26,829
And I ain't afraid
to show it, show it, show it
330
00:12:26,995 --> 00:12:28,623
Show it
331
00:12:28,789 --> 00:12:31,292
I'm sexy and I know it
332
00:12:31,458 --> 00:12:32,919
Hey
333
00:12:33,085 --> 00:12:34,862
Check it out
334
00:12:36,838 --> 00:12:38,508
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle,
wiggle, wiggle, yeah
335
00:12:38,674 --> 00:12:40,577
Wiggle, wiggle,
wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, yeah
336
00:12:40,702 --> 00:12:42,412
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle,
wiggle, wiggle, yeah
337
00:12:42,537 --> 00:12:44,263
Wiggle, wiggle,
wiggle, wiggle, yeah, yeah
338
00:12:44,429 --> 00:12:46,432
Do the wiggle, man
339
00:12:46,598 --> 00:12:48,851
Es el maneo, man
340
00:12:49,017 --> 00:12:49,852
Yeah
341
00:12:50,018 --> 00:12:52,647
Soy sexy y lo sabes
342
00:12:52,813 --> 00:12:53,815
Girl, look at that body
343
00:12:54,032 --> 00:12:55,900
Girl, look at that body
344
00:12:56,066 --> 00:12:57,485
Girl, look at that body
345
00:12:57,651 --> 00:12:58,653
I-I-I work out
346
00:12:58,819 --> 00:13:01,072
Girl, look at that body
347
00:13:01,238 --> 00:13:02,740
Girl, look at that body
348
00:13:02,906 --> 00:13:04,575
Girl, look at that body
349
00:13:04,741 --> 00:13:06,060
I-I-I work out
350
00:13:13,125 --> 00:13:15,028
I'm sexy and I know it.
351
00:13:15,153 --> 00:13:17,188
(cheering and applause)
Yeah!
352
00:13:23,594 --> 00:13:25,388
{pub}Here is the problem.
Sam and I used to date.
353
00:13:25,554 --> 00:13:28,182
Then I moved away,
and now I'm bunking at Finn and Kurt's.
354
00:13:28,348 --> 00:13:30,643
And I started dating another guy
who I really like.
355
00:13:30,809 --> 00:13:32,478
But then she and I kissed.
356
00:13:32,644 --> 00:13:33,980
And I feel really weird about it.
357
00:13:34,205 --> 00:13:35,314
Just trying to figure out a way
358
00:13:35,480 --> 00:13:37,567
to work this out without
anyone's feelings getting hurt.
359
00:13:37,733 --> 00:13:38,868
Actually, you're in luck
360
00:13:38,993 --> 00:13:41,153
because I just got
my new series of pamphlets
361
00:13:41,278 --> 00:13:42,947
back from the printer,
which uniquely address
362
00:13:43,113 --> 00:13:44,991
the modern-day issues
of today's 21st century teen.
363
00:13:45,157 --> 00:13:47,410
Yes. Okay.
364
00:13:47,576 --> 00:13:49,169
Mm-hmm.
365
00:13:51,204 --> 00:13:52,415
"So You're a Two-Timin' Ho"?
366
00:13:52,581 --> 00:13:53,583
"So You're Dating a Two-Timin' Ho."
367
00:13:53,749 --> 00:13:55,613
Right? They get
your attention, don't they?
368
00:13:55,738 --> 00:13:57,879
I mean, that... that really
makes you want to read on.
369
00:13:58,045 --> 00:13:59,505
Miss Pillsbury, I don't sleep around.
370
00:13:59,630 --> 00:14:00,840
That's not me.
371
00:14:01,006 --> 00:14:03,050
- Okay.
- I'm just trying to listen to my heart,
372
00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:05,887
and it's like I can't hear
what it's trying to tell me.
373
00:14:06,237 --> 00:14:07,980
Well, if you really want to listen,
374
00:14:08,105 --> 00:14:09,724
then you need to stop talking.
375
00:14:09,890 --> 00:14:11,392
I'm serious.
376
00:14:11,558 --> 00:14:13,235
You know, there's a lot
of communication
377
00:14:13,360 --> 00:14:14,537
in your lives these days.
378
00:14:14,662 --> 00:14:16,322
With texting and IM'ing
and Facebooking,
379
00:14:16,447 --> 00:14:17,982
I mean, you don't have any quiet time
380
00:14:18,148 --> 00:14:20,025
with yourselves
to make informed decisions
381
00:14:20,192 --> 00:14:21,994
on... on your true feelings.
382
00:14:22,119 --> 00:14:23,129
(cell phone chiming)
383
00:14:23,254 --> 00:14:24,322
For instance.
384
00:14:24,488 --> 00:14:25,498
(chirping)
385
00:14:25,623 --> 00:14:27,241
Sam just tweeted that I smell good.
386
00:14:27,407 --> 00:14:29,035
I won't stop till it's trending.
387
00:14:29,201 --> 00:14:30,519
This is my point.
388
00:14:30,644 --> 00:14:32,588
I think that you and Sam
should spend a week
389
00:14:32,713 --> 00:14:33,998
not speaking to each other.
390
00:14:34,164 --> 00:14:35,625
No e-mails, no texts, nothing.
391
00:14:35,791 --> 00:14:37,543
And I think, at the end of that week,
392
00:14:37,668 --> 00:14:39,086
you'll have
a much better idea of what
393
00:14:39,252 --> 00:14:40,254
your true feelings are.
394
00:14:40,420 --> 00:14:41,597
Shh, shh. No. No.
395
00:14:41,722 --> 00:14:44,175
Starting... starting...
396
00:14:44,341 --> 00:14:45,892
now.
(school bell ringing)
397
00:14:47,260 --> 00:14:48,270
Hooray.
398
00:14:48,395 --> 00:14:50,014
Not speaking.
399
00:14:50,180 --> 00:14:51,933
(rhythmic dance music playing)
400
00:14:59,790 --> 00:15:00,942
Whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo
401
00:15:04,545 --> 00:15:06,505
Like dang diggy diggy
d-dang a-dang dang
402
00:15:06,630 --> 00:15:07,949
Diggy dang a-diggy d-dang dang
403
00:15:08,215 --> 00:15:09,925
Diggy diggy diggy
d-dang a-dang dang
404
00:15:10,050 --> 00:15:11,369
Diggy dang a-diggy d-dang dang
405
00:15:11,535 --> 00:15:13,129
Dang diggy diggy
d-dang a-dang dang
406
00:15:13,254 --> 00:15:15,081
Diggy dang a-diggy d-dang dang
407
00:15:15,247 --> 00:15:17,083
Dang diggy diggy d-dang
408
00:15:17,374 --> 00:15:19,794
Dang diggy diggy d-dang.
409
00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:21,087
(cheering and applause)
410
00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:22,638
All right, ladies.
411
00:15:22,763 --> 00:15:26,634
Go run and find a swimming hole
to dunk those behinds in
412
00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:29,617
'cause those donkey
booties need to cool off.
413
00:15:31,655 --> 00:15:34,116
Now, I ain't no mind reader,
Sue Sylvester,
414
00:15:34,241 --> 00:15:37,570
and I came from
a very superstitious household
415
00:15:37,695 --> 00:15:40,064
where such things are not allowed,
416
00:15:40,230 --> 00:15:42,958
but I got a feeling
that those Cheerios!
417
00:15:43,083 --> 00:15:46,195
like my modern dance moves
a little bit better
418
00:15:46,361 --> 00:15:47,997
than them old stale
white-bread routines
419
00:15:48,122 --> 00:15:49,490
you've been making them do.
420
00:15:49,656 --> 00:15:51,534
You know, Roz,
421
00:15:51,700 --> 00:15:54,503
the English language
lacks the requisite words
422
00:15:54,628 --> 00:15:57,956
to express just how much
I dislike you.
423
00:15:58,123 --> 00:15:59,375
And I'm onto you.
424
00:15:59,541 --> 00:16:00,976
Yeah, I've seen All About Eve.
425
00:16:01,101 --> 00:16:02,762
I know what you're planning.
426
00:16:02,887 --> 00:16:05,214
You're waiting for me to
take maternity leave,
427
00:16:05,380 --> 00:16:08,092
and then you're going to swoop
in and try to steal my job.
428
00:16:08,258 --> 00:16:10,135
Hold up. Hold up.
Hold up. Wait.
429
00:16:10,260 --> 00:16:11,570
Oh, my God. Hold up.
430
00:16:11,695 --> 00:16:13,239
Maternity leave?
431
00:16:13,364 --> 00:16:14,890
Are you pulling my leg?
432
00:16:15,056 --> 00:16:16,325
No, I am not.
433
00:16:16,450 --> 00:16:19,770
I am getting pregnant,
and then I am having a baby.
434
00:16:19,936 --> 00:16:21,063
With whose vagina?
435
00:16:21,229 --> 00:16:23,399
Sue, you can't have no baby.
436
00:16:23,565 --> 00:16:25,067
You are old as a hill.
437
00:16:25,233 --> 00:16:27,369
You ain't gonna
give birth to no child.
438
00:16:27,494 --> 00:16:29,321
You gonna give birth to a grandchild.
439
00:16:29,446 --> 00:16:31,257
You gonna get in them stirrups,
440
00:16:31,382 --> 00:16:33,843
and you gonna push and push,
441
00:16:33,968 --> 00:16:35,661
and a full-grown adult gonna pop out
442
00:16:35,786 --> 00:16:38,205
with a briefcase and a job
talking on a cell phone.
443
00:16:38,371 --> 00:16:39,457
And by the way, I don't need
444
00:16:39,623 --> 00:16:43,085
to steal your job, Sue Sylvester.
445
00:16:43,251 --> 00:16:44,211
You know why?
446
00:16:44,377 --> 00:16:46,714
Principal Figgins
is gonna give it to me.
447
00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:48,307
He wouldn't.
448
00:16:48,432 --> 00:16:50,943
Oh, he would.
449
00:16:51,068 --> 00:16:52,928
You see, a long time ago,
450
00:16:53,094 --> 00:16:54,730
you won some trophies.
451
00:16:54,855 --> 00:16:56,724
And that was real impressive.
452
00:16:56,890 --> 00:16:59,702
I, however, am an Olympian.
453
00:16:59,827 --> 00:17:02,521
I won this bronze damn Olympic medal
454
00:17:02,687 --> 00:17:04,190
in Beijing, China.
455
00:17:04,356 --> 00:17:05,691
I had noodles with the president
456
00:17:05,816 --> 00:17:07,485
and a threesome with Michael Phelps.
457
00:17:07,651 --> 00:17:08,694
What you need to do
458
00:17:08,919 --> 00:17:10,796
is wake up and smell the menopause.
459
00:17:11,144 --> 00:17:14,032
You are... done... as a coach,
460
00:17:14,157 --> 00:17:16,135
and all the hormones in Thailand
461
00:17:16,260 --> 00:17:18,371
can't change the fact
that you are done as a woman.
462
00:17:18,537 --> 00:17:20,673
What you need to do is start praying
463
00:17:20,798 --> 00:17:22,375
that you give birth to a child
464
00:17:22,541 --> 00:17:24,093
that likes to eat sand,
465
00:17:24,218 --> 00:17:27,020
'cause that's all that's coming
out those old, wrinkly boobs.
466
00:17:30,006 --> 00:17:32,484
I can do this.
467
00:17:32,609 --> 00:17:34,694
I can do anything.
468
00:17:36,429 --> 00:17:38,197
♪
469
00:17:44,187 --> 00:17:46,448
How is the girl with no ass
supposed to choose
470
00:17:46,573 --> 00:17:49,694
between the juiced-up wolf
and the depressed vampire?
471
00:17:49,860 --> 00:17:50,920
She's into both of them.
472
00:17:51,045 --> 00:17:53,122
Oh, come on, Mercedes.
She just knows.
473
00:17:53,452 --> 00:17:55,758
But what if they both make her
feel amazing in different ways?
474
00:17:55,883 --> 00:17:58,177
Well, you don't get to choose
when it comes to true love.
475
00:17:58,302 --> 00:17:59,511
True love chooses you.
476
00:17:59,636 --> 00:18:01,513
And you better be certain
when it comes to marriage
477
00:18:01,638 --> 00:18:03,405
because marriage is promise,
and it lasts for forever.
478
00:18:03,530 --> 00:18:04,767
Ladies, I appreciate you
spending time
479
00:18:04,892 --> 00:18:06,101
with me while Blaine recovers,
480
00:18:06,226 --> 00:18:08,212
but why are you being
so weird and serious?
481
00:18:08,378 --> 00:18:10,396
Our periods don't come
until the end of the month.
482
00:18:15,486 --> 00:18:16,395
(TV shuts off)
483
00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:18,097
Can you guys keep a secret?
484
00:18:22,726 --> 00:18:24,145
Rachel, what the hell is that?
485
00:18:24,311 --> 00:18:25,688
It's an engagement ring.
486
00:18:25,854 --> 00:18:27,398
Shut up!
487
00:18:27,564 --> 00:18:28,607
Finn proposed.
488
00:18:28,773 --> 00:18:30,693
- And what did you say?
- I said yes.
489
00:18:30,859 --> 00:18:31,986
Rachel, have you lost your damn mind?
490
00:18:32,152 --> 00:18:33,738
But I love Finn.
I really, really love him.
491
00:18:33,904 --> 00:18:35,547
- But what about NYADA?
- It's still going to happen.
492
00:18:35,672 --> 00:18:37,082
I have dreams for a huge life
493
00:18:37,207 --> 00:18:38,492
for myself, okay,
some of which include,
494
00:18:38,658 --> 00:18:39,952
you know, a little bit of struggle
495
00:18:40,077 --> 00:18:42,004
until I can make all
of my dreams come true.
496
00:18:42,129 --> 00:18:44,289
They'll be great anecdotes
for the Jimmy Kimmel show.
497
00:18:44,414 --> 00:18:45,958
I'll call them my Top Ramen weeks.
498
00:18:46,124 --> 00:18:48,085
But in every single
one of my dreams...
499
00:18:48,302 --> 00:18:50,963
okay, struggling or not...
there he is.
500
00:18:51,088 --> 00:18:52,506
Finn.
501
00:18:52,672 --> 00:18:54,767
Look, I know that I
am going to be with Finn
502
00:18:54,892 --> 00:18:56,735
for the rest of my life,
just as much as I know
503
00:18:56,860 --> 00:18:59,510
that I am going to be
a huge star one day.
504
00:19:00,364 --> 00:19:01,932
So you promise not to tell anyone?
505
00:19:02,098 --> 00:19:03,976
Okay, I'm going home right now
to yell at Finn,
506
00:19:04,101 --> 00:19:05,436
because this is insane.
507
00:19:05,602 --> 00:19:07,354
That is not fair, Kurt.
I mean, what would
508
00:19:07,520 --> 00:19:09,023
you do if Blaine proposed
to you today?
509
00:19:12,609 --> 00:19:14,069
So will you please keep my secret?
510
00:19:14,235 --> 00:19:16,781
Aren't you scared
you're making the wrong choice?
511
00:19:16,997 --> 00:19:20,659
Look, I know that I have
the right person.
512
00:19:20,784 --> 00:19:24,205
Scary part was just...
choosing to know it.
513
00:19:24,421 --> 00:19:26,215
(Gloria Estefan's
"Don't Wanna Lose You" begins)
514
00:19:26,340 --> 00:19:30,252
Sometimes it's hard
515
00:19:32,262 --> 00:19:36,300
To make things clear
516
00:19:38,352 --> 00:19:41,514
Or know when to face the truth
517
00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:43,432
And I know
518
00:19:43,598 --> 00:19:47,144
That the moment is here
519
00:19:49,980 --> 00:19:54,360
So open your eyes
520
00:19:55,586 --> 00:20:00,783
And see who I am
521
00:20:00,949 --> 00:20:03,552
And not who you want
522
00:20:03,677 --> 00:20:06,805
For me to be
523
00:20:06,930 --> 00:20:10,709
I am only myself
524
00:20:10,934 --> 00:20:13,462
Myself
525
00:20:13,628 --> 00:20:19,093
Si voy a perderte ya
526
00:20:19,309 --> 00:20:25,015
Que sea por vez final
527
00:20:25,181 --> 00:20:30,145
Si voy a perderte ya
528
00:20:31,455 --> 00:20:33,899
Si voy a perderte
529
00:20:34,024 --> 00:20:37,444
Voy a perderte
530
00:20:37,661 --> 00:20:43,909
Ya...
531
00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:48,873
Yeah
532
00:20:49,039 --> 00:20:51,667
No, no vuelvas
533
00:20:53,043 --> 00:20:55,629
No, no vuelvas
534
00:20:55,795 --> 00:20:57,882
No vuelvas
535
00:20:58,048 --> 00:21:00,426
Si voy a perderte
536
00:21:00,592 --> 00:21:05,264
Ya
537
00:21:05,430 --> 00:21:07,850
(cheering and applause)
538
00:21:21,029 --> 00:21:24,283
{pub}Este amor llega así
de esta manera
539
00:21:25,784 --> 00:21:27,198
No tiene la culpa
540
00:21:28,703 --> 00:21:30,661
Caballo de danza vana
541
00:21:30,786 --> 00:21:32,129
Porque muy despreciado
542
00:21:32,254 --> 00:21:33,876
Por eso
543
00:21:34,042 --> 00:21:36,157
No te perdona de llorar
544
00:21:37,837 --> 00:21:40,345
Este amor llega así
de esta manera
545
00:21:41,966 --> 00:21:43,848
No tiene la culpa
546
00:21:46,262 --> 00:21:48,057
Amor de comprementa
547
00:21:48,223 --> 00:21:49,892
Amor del pasado
548
00:21:50,058 --> 00:21:52,349
Bembele, bembele, bembele
549
00:21:52,474 --> 00:21:53,841
Bem, bembele, bembele
550
00:21:57,107 --> 00:22:01,445
Bamboleo, bambolea
551
00:22:01,611 --> 00:22:04,862
Porque mi vida,
yo la prefiero vivir asi
552
00:22:04,987 --> 00:22:06,867
Bamboleo!
553
00:22:07,033 --> 00:22:09,036
Bambolea!
554
00:22:09,202 --> 00:22:13,707
Porque mi vida,
yo la prefiero vivir asi
555
00:22:13,873 --> 00:22:18,045
Would you dance
if I asked you to dance?
556
00:22:18,211 --> 00:22:22,007
Would you run
and never look back?
557
00:22:22,173 --> 00:22:25,970
Would you cry
if you saw me crying?
558
00:22:26,136 --> 00:22:28,559
And would you save
my soul tonight?
559
00:22:30,932 --> 00:22:32,977
I can be your hero, baby
560
00:22:33,143 --> 00:22:35,025
La-la-la-la-la
561
00:22:35,150 --> 00:22:36,939
I can kiss away the pain
562
00:22:37,105 --> 00:22:39,274
La-la-la-la-la
563
00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:41,443
I will stand by you forever
564
00:22:41,609 --> 00:22:42,700
La-la-la-la-la
565
00:22:42,825 --> 00:22:45,569
You can take my breath away
566
00:22:45,694 --> 00:22:47,157
You can take my breath away
567
00:22:47,323 --> 00:22:52,329
I can be your hero
568
00:22:52,495 --> 00:22:54,452
(cheering)
569
00:22:55,915 --> 00:22:59,105
Guys, that was some
muy serious footwork!
570
00:22:59,775 --> 00:23:01,296
Muy means "very."
571
00:23:01,462 --> 00:23:03,340
I was in it mostly for the boots.
572
00:23:03,506 --> 00:23:06,010
Yeah, what's the deal with those boots?
Because wow.
573
00:23:06,176 --> 00:23:08,625
They're Mexican hipster boots.
It's kind of like a fad
574
00:23:08,750 --> 00:23:11,557
for groups of guys that are into
dance music,
575
00:23:11,723 --> 00:23:13,392
and we're kind of like a dance crew.
576
00:23:13,558 --> 00:23:14,643
Señor Martinez told us about it.
577
00:23:14,809 --> 00:23:16,812
The teeth, the duende,
578
00:23:16,978 --> 00:23:18,480
the bizarre Mexican fads.
Señor Martinez is, like,
579
00:23:18,646 --> 00:23:20,566
the best Spanish teacher ever.
580
00:23:20,732 --> 00:23:22,673
I can't wait to see your
performance, Mr. Shue.
581
00:23:22,942 --> 00:23:24,278
My performance?
582
00:23:24,444 --> 00:23:26,238
Yeah, to defend
your Spanish teacher honor.
583
00:23:26,404 --> 00:23:29,908
I'm sure you have
something muy amazing planned.
584
00:23:30,074 --> 00:23:31,289
(bell ringing)
585
00:23:41,419 --> 00:23:42,927
I take it Will told you.
586
00:23:43,213 --> 00:23:44,840
Yes. Will tells me everything.
587
00:23:45,006 --> 00:23:49,261
It is so inappropriate for you
to ask him to father your child.
588
00:23:49,427 --> 00:23:52,139
Have a seat, Lady Bird Hollow Pelvis.
589
00:23:52,305 --> 00:23:54,058
And be careful,
those chairs are hard.
590
00:23:54,224 --> 00:23:55,642
I know how fragile your bones are.
591
00:23:55,808 --> 00:23:58,609
Okay, look, I know how it feels
to want
592
00:23:58,895 --> 00:23:59,730
to start a family.
593
00:23:59,896 --> 00:24:01,065
I want to have a baby, too.
594
00:24:01,231 --> 00:24:02,363
I wouldn't get your hopes up.
595
00:24:02,488 --> 00:24:04,064
I doubt your avian frame
could withstand
596
00:24:04,189 --> 00:24:05,319
the rigors of childbirth.
597
00:24:05,485 --> 00:24:06,900
Okay, just tell me, why Will?
598
00:24:07,960 --> 00:24:10,240
You hate him.
You've made that very clear.
599
00:24:10,406 --> 00:24:12,039
Well, In case you haven't
noticed, Deena,
600
00:24:12,164 --> 00:24:13,660
I have a little bit of a mean streak.
601
00:24:13,826 --> 00:24:17,027
I'm cunning, I'm vindictive,
I spend a large portion
602
00:24:17,152 --> 00:24:19,964
of every day vibrating
with a palpable sense
603
00:24:20,089 --> 00:24:21,923
of wild, irrational rage.
604
00:24:23,920 --> 00:24:28,050
And I don't ever want my kid
to feel that.
605
00:24:28,216 --> 00:24:31,392
And every time I've insulted Will
606
00:24:31,517 --> 00:24:33,310
or tried to stop him in his crusade
607
00:24:33,435 --> 00:24:36,063
to ruin pop culture
by wiping his woolly behind
608
00:24:36,188 --> 00:24:38,143
with the American songbook,
609
00:24:38,309 --> 00:24:44,024
he's always risen up
and met me with kindness.
610
00:24:44,190 --> 00:24:47,861
If goodness and optimism
are somehow genetic,
611
00:24:48,027 --> 00:24:50,952
that's what I want for my child.
612
00:24:57,209 --> 00:24:59,414
He isn't gonna do it, is he?
613
00:24:59,580 --> 00:25:01,250
I prefer to let him tell you that.
614
00:25:01,416 --> 00:25:05,259
I'm really sorry, Sue.
615
00:25:05,545 --> 00:25:07,378
You know, for what it's worth,
616
00:25:07,503 --> 00:25:10,221
I... I think you should have a child.
617
00:25:12,677 --> 00:25:14,392
I think it'd be really good for you.
618
00:25:18,680 --> 00:25:20,064
(bell ringing)
619
00:25:27,741 --> 00:25:30,237
Hey, dude.
You want to lift some?
620
00:25:30,403 --> 00:25:31,869
No, thanks.
621
00:25:31,994 --> 00:25:33,620
I've never really understood
the whole process.
622
00:25:33,745 --> 00:25:36,123
Plus, I do The Tracey Anderson Method
623
00:25:36,248 --> 00:25:38,409
in the comfort and privacy
of my own bedroom.
624
00:25:38,534 --> 00:25:39,567
Hmm.
625
00:25:41,870 --> 00:25:45,210
Why don't you pick up these?
626
00:25:45,376 --> 00:25:47,051
They're from Mrs. Pillsbury.
627
00:25:47,176 --> 00:25:48,807
- College brochures.
- What do you got?
628
00:25:49,074 --> 00:25:50,757
Fordham, NYU, Adelphi.
629
00:25:50,923 --> 00:25:52,122
That one's in Long Island.
630
00:25:52,247 --> 00:25:53,957
Yeah, there's a train
station right next to the campus
631
00:25:54,082 --> 00:25:55,053
right into Manhattan.
632
00:25:55,219 --> 00:25:57,556
I think they have a football team.
633
00:25:57,722 --> 00:25:59,641
I think they all have musical
theater programs, too.
634
00:25:59,807 --> 00:26:00,981
That's sweet, dude, but you know,
635
00:26:01,106 --> 00:26:02,186
college isn't for everyone.
636
00:26:02,352 --> 00:26:03,478
Neither is marriage.
637
00:26:04,937 --> 00:26:06,607
I can't believe she told you.
638
00:26:06,773 --> 00:26:09,234
I can't believe you didn't.
We're supposed to be brothers.
639
00:26:09,400 --> 00:26:10,807
Look, I didn't want to put you in
640
00:26:10,932 --> 00:26:11,875
an awkward position with Burt, okay?
641
00:26:12,000 --> 00:26:13,363
I don't want him to know yet.
642
00:26:13,529 --> 00:26:14,445
Hey, you think something
643
00:26:14,570 --> 00:26:16,029
you have to keep
from everyone you love
644
00:26:16,154 --> 00:26:18,118
might not be the best idea in
the first place?
645
00:26:18,284 --> 00:26:20,084
Don't get down on me
about this, dude.
646
00:26:20,209 --> 00:26:21,985
Rachel's, like, the only good
thing I've got going
647
00:26:22,110 --> 00:26:23,207
in my life right now.
648
00:26:23,373 --> 00:26:25,000
No, she isn't, Finn.
649
00:26:25,166 --> 00:26:27,669
Look, I get you've had a rough
year with finding out
650
00:26:27,835 --> 00:26:29,922
who your dad really is and-and
losing the scholarship,
651
00:26:30,088 --> 00:26:33,630
but you're a star, Finn,
just as bright as Rachel.
652
00:26:33,755 --> 00:26:35,177
You just don't believe in yourself.
653
00:26:35,343 --> 00:26:36,967
Yeah, well, the proof's in
the pudding, okay?
654
00:26:37,092 --> 00:26:39,348
And my pudding pretty much sucks.
655
00:26:39,514 --> 00:26:42,189
Look, I'm not telling you that
you shouldn't marry Rachel.
656
00:26:42,314 --> 00:26:43,977
I love her despite all of her crazy,
657
00:26:44,143 --> 00:26:47,064
and I think that you'd be
lucky to marry her... one day.
658
00:26:47,230 --> 00:26:48,946
But I don't want you just to
turn yourself into nothing
659
00:26:49,071 --> 00:26:50,901
but the guy who holds her purse
on the red carpet.
660
00:26:51,067 --> 00:26:52,316
Look, I'm getting to the
point in my life where
661
00:26:52,441 --> 00:26:54,446
I kind of need to be honest with
myself about who I am.
662
00:26:54,612 --> 00:26:55,822
And who is that?
663
00:26:55,988 --> 00:26:57,754
Not you.
664
00:26:57,879 --> 00:27:00,452
Not Rachel.
665
00:27:00,618 --> 00:27:02,659
That's the point, Finn.
666
00:27:02,784 --> 00:27:05,415
There are plenty of us, trust me.
667
00:27:05,581 --> 00:27:09,002
The one thing that Glee Clubs
and theater programs don't have
668
00:27:09,168 --> 00:27:11,964
is the hot, straight football player
who can sing and sort of dance.
669
00:27:13,805 --> 00:27:15,429
You're unique, Finn.
670
00:27:15,860 --> 00:27:17,925
And I can't see this proposal
thing as anything else
671
00:27:18,050 --> 00:27:20,013
but you giving up on yourself.
672
00:27:20,179 --> 00:27:22,470
No, no, it's not.
673
00:27:25,057 --> 00:27:27,020
At least I don't...
I don't think it is.
674
00:27:28,585 --> 00:27:30,335
Your time isn't up, Finn.
675
00:27:31,260 --> 00:27:32,513
It's just beginning.
676
00:27:36,351 --> 00:27:37,851
Hey, Kurt.
677
00:27:40,324 --> 00:27:42,373
Thanks.
678
00:27:45,079 --> 00:27:47,328
(bell ringing)
679
00:27:53,772 --> 00:27:55,299
Hold it right there, Sandbacks.
680
00:27:55,606 --> 00:27:57,301
You and I need to
have a serious chat.
681
00:27:57,608 --> 00:27:59,318
Now I realize when I chose Becky
682
00:27:59,443 --> 00:28:00,569
as co-captain for the Cheerios!
683
00:28:00,694 --> 00:28:02,097
it might have rubbed
you the wrong way.
684
00:28:02,263 --> 00:28:03,181
Wanky.
685
00:28:03,614 --> 00:28:05,273
And I've often admired
the craven heartlessness
686
00:28:05,398 --> 00:28:07,686
of your pointless,
vindictive back-stabbing.
687
00:28:08,001 --> 00:28:10,045
Kind of takes me back
to the old salad days.
688
00:28:10,170 --> 00:28:11,982
But you crossed the Maginot Line
689
00:28:12,148 --> 00:28:13,900
when you started messing with
Sue Sylvester's family.
690
00:28:14,066 --> 00:28:16,028
What are you talking about?
What family?
691
00:28:16,194 --> 00:28:18,322
You lodged a complaint
about my teaching tactics
692
00:28:18,488 --> 00:28:20,490
with Principal Figgins,
possibly derailing my bid
693
00:28:20,747 --> 00:28:23,493
for tenure just when I'm trying
to have a baby!
694
00:28:23,717 --> 00:28:26,371
A baby? With whose vagina?
695
00:28:26,603 --> 00:28:28,040
Hey, what is going on here?
696
00:28:28,305 --> 00:28:30,649
Coach Sylvester is accusing me
of something I didn't do.
697
00:28:30,774 --> 00:28:33,101
Oh, stop with the lies, sweater
meat, or you will be hawking
698
00:28:33,226 --> 00:28:34,921
nude glossies of yourself behind
the Dumpster of Hooters
699
00:28:35,087 --> 00:28:36,173
by the weekend.
700
00:28:36,396 --> 00:28:37,406
I know you did this!
701
00:28:37,531 --> 00:28:38,743
Sue, enough!
702
00:28:39,035 --> 00:28:41,386
No one messes with my family.
No one.
703
00:28:42,869 --> 00:28:44,947
Oh, and you can rest your fetid,
woolly head, William.
704
00:28:45,072 --> 00:28:46,815
I don't need your baby spunk anymore.
705
00:28:46,940 --> 00:28:49,668
Got myself another donor.
And a much better one.
706
00:28:49,793 --> 00:28:51,243
Who?
707
00:28:58,785 --> 00:29:01,365
(bell ringing)
708
00:29:01,588 --> 00:29:03,575
(foops approach)
709
00:29:05,291 --> 00:29:07,329
I just got my new pamphlets
back from the printer.
710
00:29:07,644 --> 00:29:11,223
I am feeling so Stephen King
with these things lately.
711
00:29:11,348 --> 00:29:13,275
You know, just so prolific.
712
00:29:13,400 --> 00:29:14,943
That's great, Em, but I really need
713
00:29:15,068 --> 00:29:16,895
to translate this song
for my big number tomorrow.
714
00:29:17,020 --> 00:29:19,091
It's my last chance to wow
the kids with my español.
715
00:29:19,439 --> 00:29:20,884
By the end of the week, I need
716
00:29:21,141 --> 00:29:22,651
every single one of those kids
begging Figgins
717
00:29:22,776 --> 00:29:24,903
to give me that tenure spot.
718
00:29:25,028 --> 00:29:27,155
Conversación.
Of course.
719
00:29:27,280 --> 00:29:29,658
"Conversation" in Spanish is
conversación.
720
00:29:29,783 --> 00:29:31,500
(sighs)
721
00:29:35,565 --> 00:29:37,609
Do you realize how important
this tenure is for us,
722
00:29:37,841 --> 00:29:39,051
if we want to start a family?
723
00:29:39,176 --> 00:29:41,053
It means we will
always be able to feed our kids,
724
00:29:41,178 --> 00:29:43,323
get them health insurance.
725
00:29:46,049 --> 00:29:47,559
Emma, enough!
726
00:29:47,684 --> 00:29:51,003
Can't you see I'm doing
this to take care of you?
727
00:29:52,672 --> 00:29:55,752
Okay, I think I can
take care of myself.
728
00:29:55,918 --> 00:29:57,921
You know what, I'm sorry.
729
00:29:58,178 --> 00:29:59,855
I just wanted to show
you my new pamphlets.
730
00:29:59,980 --> 00:30:01,239
I'm really proud of them.
731
00:30:01,364 --> 00:30:04,219
They're silly, Emma.
I'm sorry, I love you,
732
00:30:04,517 --> 00:30:06,495
but do you really think
the kids take them seriously?
733
00:30:06,620 --> 00:30:07,440
Okay, you know what?
734
00:30:07,565 --> 00:30:09,581
I know that the titles are silly;
that's the point.
735
00:30:09,706 --> 00:30:11,950
Sometimes you have to
be a little provocative
736
00:30:12,075 --> 00:30:14,002
if you want to get
teenagers' attention.
737
00:30:14,127 --> 00:30:15,772
They're conversación starters.
738
00:30:15,938 --> 00:30:17,482
And you're being really mean.
739
00:30:17,714 --> 00:30:19,614
You got a pamphlet for that?
740
00:30:20,584 --> 00:30:22,279
Emma, I'm sorry.
741
00:30:22,502 --> 00:30:23,738
Emma, wait.
742
00:30:28,367 --> 00:30:30,559
(Madonna's "La Isla Bonita" begins)
743
00:30:32,579 --> 00:30:34,761
Como puede ser verdad?
744
00:30:36,366 --> 00:30:40,422
Last night I dreamt of San Pedro
745
00:30:40,671 --> 00:30:44,593
Just like I'd never gone,
I knew the song
746
00:30:44,841 --> 00:30:49,421
A young girl with eyes
like the desert
747
00:30:49,546 --> 00:30:53,105
It all seems like yesterday,
not far away
748
00:30:53,809 --> 00:30:55,312
BOTH:
Tropical the island breeze
749
00:30:55,478 --> 00:30:57,763
All of nature wild and free
750
00:30:57,888 --> 00:30:59,191
This is where I long to be
751
00:30:59,357 --> 00:31:01,483
La isla bonita
752
00:31:01,608 --> 00:31:04,154
And when the samba played
753
00:31:04,320 --> 00:31:05,614
The sun would set so high
754
00:31:05,780 --> 00:31:08,158
Ring through my ears
and sting my eyes
755
00:31:08,324 --> 00:31:11,953
Your Spanish lullaby
756
00:31:12,202 --> 00:31:15,123
I fell in love with San Pedro
757
00:31:15,289 --> 00:31:17,148
Mr. Shue, what's with the shiny coat?
758
00:31:17,273 --> 00:31:18,500
I thought you were Kurt.
759
00:31:18,625 --> 00:31:21,546
I'm an authentic Spanish matador.
760
00:31:21,712 --> 00:31:25,509
Te dijo te amo
761
00:31:25,675 --> 00:31:29,262
I prayed that the days would last,
they went so fast
762
00:31:29,428 --> 00:31:31,306
Tropical the island breeze
763
00:31:31,472 --> 00:31:33,515
All of nature wild and free
764
00:31:33,640 --> 00:31:35,467
This is where I long to be
765
00:31:35,592 --> 00:31:37,979
La isla bonita
766
00:31:38,145 --> 00:31:40,355
And when the samba played
767
00:31:40,480 --> 00:31:42,057
The sun would set so high
768
00:31:42,182 --> 00:31:43,610
Ring through my ears
and sting my eyes
769
00:31:43,776 --> 00:31:47,145
Your Spanish lullaby
770
00:31:47,270 --> 00:31:51,243
Yo quiero estar
donde el sol toca el cielo
771
00:31:51,409 --> 00:31:53,453
Cuando es hora de siesta
772
00:31:53,619 --> 00:31:55,120
Tu los puedes ver pasar
773
00:31:55,245 --> 00:31:57,791
Caras tan bellas
774
00:31:57,957 --> 00:32:00,085
Se importan nada
775
00:32:00,333 --> 00:32:05,298
Where a girl loves a boy,
and a boy
776
00:32:05,464 --> 00:32:06,758
Loves a girl
777
00:32:06,924 --> 00:32:09,761
Ah, ah, ah, ah
778
00:32:09,927 --> 00:32:12,504
Ooh-ooh-ooh ooh-ooh oooh
779
00:32:12,629 --> 00:32:14,873
- Your Spanish lullaby
- Hey
780
00:32:14,998 --> 00:32:17,394
Tropical the island breeze
781
00:32:17,560 --> 00:32:19,062
All of nature wild and free
782
00:32:19,228 --> 00:32:21,856
This is where I long to be
783
00:32:22,022 --> 00:32:23,483
La isla bonita
784
00:32:23,649 --> 00:32:25,944
And when the samba played
785
00:32:26,176 --> 00:32:28,488
The sun would set so high,
ring through my ears
786
00:32:28,654 --> 00:32:29,888
And sting my eyes
787
00:32:30,013 --> 00:32:31,699
Your Spanish lullaby
788
00:32:31,824 --> 00:32:33,368
Yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah
789
00:32:33,534 --> 00:32:34,910
Bop-bop-bop bop-ba
790
00:32:35,035 --> 00:32:36,496
Ooh
791
00:32:36,662 --> 00:32:39,583
Oooh, yeah
792
00:32:39,749 --> 00:32:41,126
La isla bonita
793
00:32:41,292 --> 00:32:42,233
La isla
794
00:32:42,358 --> 00:32:44,836
Bonita
795
00:32:44,961 --> 00:32:47,575
Bonita, bonita
796
00:32:47,700 --> 00:32:50,093
Your Spanish lullaby
797
00:32:52,386 --> 00:32:53,638
(cheering)
798
00:32:53,804 --> 00:32:55,473
SANTANA:
Ladies and gentlemen,
799
00:32:55,639 --> 00:32:57,039
David Martinez.
800
00:32:59,643 --> 00:33:01,271
Santana, fantástico.
801
00:33:01,437 --> 00:33:02,272
David, I'm just
802
00:33:02,438 --> 00:33:03,922
a little... I don't know...
803
00:33:04,047 --> 00:33:06,547
confused about
your participation here.
804
00:33:09,737 --> 00:33:11,323
And, hey, wasn't
that number fantastic
805
00:33:11,489 --> 00:33:12,991
and truly authentic?
806
00:33:13,157 --> 00:33:14,866
(cheering, applause)
807
00:33:14,991 --> 00:33:16,536
DAVID:
Thank you very much, everyone.
808
00:33:16,702 --> 00:33:18,788
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have a stack of
809
00:33:18,954 --> 00:33:20,582
night school exams on my desk
810
00:33:20,748 --> 00:33:23,335
that won't grade themselves,
so buenas noches.
811
00:33:23,501 --> 00:33:24,127
Muchas gracias.
812
00:33:24,293 --> 00:33:25,253
Bye-bye.
813
00:33:25,419 --> 00:33:27,756
Well, Mr. Shue,
the floor is all yours.
814
00:33:27,922 --> 00:33:30,382
- I'm excited.
- Yay, Mr. Shue.
815
00:33:30,507 --> 00:33:32,374
Really, I'm excited.
Mr. Shue, you got this!
816
00:33:35,661 --> 00:33:37,291
{pub}Ya-ha-ha-ha-hi!
817
00:33:37,416 --> 00:33:39,043
(mariachi music playing)
818
00:33:39,168 --> 00:33:42,504
(whooping):
Ow-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
819
00:33:49,929 --> 00:33:53,490
A little less conversation,
a little more action, please
820
00:33:53,656 --> 00:33:57,827
All this aggravation
ain't satisfactioning me
821
00:33:57,993 --> 00:33:59,996
A little more bite,
a little less bark
822
00:34:00,162 --> 00:34:01,748
A little less fight,
a little more spark
823
00:34:01,914 --> 00:34:03,625
Close your mouth
and open up your heart
824
00:34:03,791 --> 00:34:05,186
And baby, satisfy me
825
00:34:05,311 --> 00:34:08,254
Satisfy me, baby
826
00:34:08,420 --> 00:34:10,340
Vamos ir a los dos
escuchar la musica
827
00:34:10,506 --> 00:34:11,942
Y viajar por la brisa de verano
828
00:34:12,067 --> 00:34:14,829
Que buenisima la noche
ya te enseñe como salga
829
00:34:14,954 --> 00:34:17,138
Andale, muchacha, ven, relájate
830
00:34:17,304 --> 00:34:20,835
Menos conversación y mas
accion, por favor
831
00:34:20,960 --> 00:34:24,521
Este agravamiento no me
satisface a mi
832
00:34:24,687 --> 00:34:27,315
A ltle more bite,
a little less bark
833
00:34:27,481 --> 00:34:29,009
A little less fight,
a little more spark
834
00:34:29,134 --> 00:34:32,637
No hablas mas y abre tu
corazon y satisfaceme
835
00:34:32,903 --> 00:34:35,615
Satisfaceme, bebe
836
00:34:36,282 --> 00:34:39,452
Come on, baby,
I'm tired of talking
837
00:34:39,618 --> 00:34:43,214
Grab your coat
and let's start walking
838
00:34:43,581 --> 00:34:47,645
A little less conversation,
a little more action, please
839
00:34:47,770 --> 00:34:52,215
All this aggravation
ain't satisfactioning me
840
00:34:52,381 --> 00:34:54,592
A little more bite,
a little less bark
841
00:34:54,758 --> 00:34:56,487
A little less fight,
a little more spark
842
00:34:56,612 --> 00:34:57,929
Shut your mouth
and open up your heart
843
00:34:58,095 --> 00:34:59,973
And, baby, satisfy me
844
00:35:00,139 --> 00:35:02,934
Satisfy me, baby
845
00:35:03,100 --> 00:35:05,687
Menos conversación y mas
accion, por favor
846
00:35:05,853 --> 00:35:07,230
Hey! Muchas gracias.
847
00:35:07,396 --> 00:35:09,750
(cheering, applause)
848
00:35:10,024 --> 00:35:11,342
(chuckles)
849
00:35:12,818 --> 00:35:14,404
It was you.
850
00:35:14,570 --> 00:35:16,364
You're the one who complained
to Principal Figgins about me.
851
00:35:16,530 --> 00:35:18,908
Yeah, and I'd do it all over
again after that performance.
852
00:35:19,074 --> 00:35:20,627
You're messing with
adult things here, Santana.
853
00:35:20,752 --> 00:35:22,954
This is my job.
This is my life.
854
00:35:23,120 --> 00:35:25,632
And this is my education,
and it's not a joke to me,
855
00:35:25,757 --> 00:35:27,459
although it seems to be one to you.
856
00:35:27,625 --> 00:35:29,711
What are you talking about?
They all loved my performance.
857
00:35:29,877 --> 00:35:31,155
Because they don't know any better.
858
00:35:31,280 --> 00:35:33,339
It's your fault.
You're their teacher.
859
00:35:33,505 --> 00:35:36,717
You went from "La Cucaracha"
to a bullfighting mariachi.
860
00:35:36,842 --> 00:35:40,054
Why don't you just dress up
as the Taco Bell Chihuahua
861
00:35:40,220 --> 00:35:42,223
and bark the theme song
to Dora the Explorer?<
862
00:35:42,389 --> 00:35:44,434
You don't even know enough
to be embarrassed
863
00:35:44,600 --> 00:35:46,936
about these stereotypes
that you're perpetuating.
864
00:35:47,102 --> 00:35:48,354
That's not fair.
Isn't it?
865
00:35:48,520 --> 00:35:51,399
What did you want to be
when you grew up?
866
00:35:51,565 --> 00:35:53,668
Why did you become
a Spanish teacher, Mr. Shue?
867
00:35:57,163 --> 00:35:58,164
Because...
868
00:36:03,196 --> 00:36:06,481
it was the only teaching
position open at the time.
869
00:36:08,800 --> 00:36:11,645
I want to remind you
of something that
870
00:36:11,770 --> 00:36:14,005
an amazing teacher once taught me:
871
00:36:14,171 --> 00:36:17,465
without passion, you can't succeed.
872
00:36:18,694 --> 00:36:19,994
Who taught you that?
873
00:36:20,344 --> 00:36:21,989
You did.
874
00:36:22,114 --> 00:36:23,457
And you do.
875
00:36:23,582 --> 00:36:24,933
When you teach Glee.
876
00:36:29,103 --> 00:36:31,873
I'm telling you,
there's no word but "genius."
877
00:36:32,107 --> 00:36:33,733
I wouldn't call it that.
878
00:36:33,899 --> 00:36:35,360
What's genius?
My plan for Regionals?
879
00:36:35,526 --> 00:36:38,363
No. Your lil'punkin's pamphlets.
880
00:36:39,697 --> 00:36:40,782
"Taint Misbehavin'."
881
00:36:40,948 --> 00:36:41,709
Mm-hmm.
882
00:36:41,834 --> 00:36:43,026
It's all about the importance
883
00:36:43,151 --> 00:36:44,577
of thoroughly washing your jockstrap.
884
00:36:44,743 --> 00:36:46,162
(chuckles)
Hey, bub,
885
00:36:46,328 --> 00:36:48,289
MRSA bacteria infection
is no laughing matter.
886
00:36:48,455 --> 00:36:49,415
No matter how much I talked
887
00:36:49,675 --> 00:36:52,710
to my guys about
the steamy lurking dangers,
888
00:36:52,876 --> 00:36:53,753
nobody cared
889
00:36:54,012 --> 00:36:56,005
Until Emma found a way
to get through to them.
890
00:36:56,171 --> 00:36:57,925
Come on, guys!
891
00:36:58,050 --> 00:37:01,095
Why, just last week,
three Fort Wayne gymnasts
892
00:37:01,220 --> 00:37:03,547
had to have their junk amputated!
893
00:37:03,672 --> 00:37:06,183
I stopped washing down there
'cause it seemed kind of gay.
894
00:37:06,308 --> 00:37:08,518
I thought that's what the hair
was for: catching the dirt.
895
00:37:09,027 --> 00:37:10,688
Huh. Lift and scrub.
896
00:37:10,813 --> 00:37:12,146
Who knew it was so easy?
897
00:37:12,447 --> 00:37:14,232
BEISTE:
And now their kibbles and bits are
898
00:37:14,449 --> 00:37:15,942
as clean as a little angel's tear.
899
00:37:16,108 --> 00:37:18,061
And when I showed that to my Cooter,
900
00:37:18,186 --> 00:37:21,948
not only did he order
10,000 copies for Ohio State,
901
00:37:22,114 --> 00:37:25,285
he got every team in the Big Ten
to order copies, too.
902
00:37:25,451 --> 00:37:27,495
- Wow, that's...
- It's genius!
903
00:37:27,661 --> 00:37:29,998
I have never met a
teacher whose passion
904
00:37:30,164 --> 00:37:31,833
literally saves lives.
905
00:37:31,999 --> 00:37:33,376
Aren't you proud of her, Will?
906
00:37:34,752 --> 00:37:36,280
Yes.
907
00:37:36,405 --> 00:37:37,338
Absolutely.
908
00:37:38,922 --> 00:37:40,383
Genius! You!
909
00:37:40,549 --> 00:37:41,550
EMMA:
Stop.
910
00:37:44,680 --> 00:37:47,223
{pub}And the award for Best Conjugator
goes to
911
00:37:47,389 --> 00:37:48,393
Señora Stephanie.
912
00:37:48,518 --> 00:37:49,601
(laughs)
913
00:37:50,887 --> 00:37:53,531
Thank you, Señor Martinez.
914
00:37:53,656 --> 00:37:55,734
And thanks to you, Claudia knows now
915
00:37:55,859 --> 00:37:57,935
to go before she comes to work.
916
00:37:58,060 --> 00:37:59,527
(laughs)
917
00:37:59,693 --> 00:38:02,071
Now finally, Most Improved:
918
00:38:02,237 --> 00:38:04,542
Will Schuester.
919
00:38:04,667 --> 00:38:06,044
- Wow.
- Come on, man!
920
00:38:06,169 --> 00:38:07,744
(chuckles)
Thanks.
921
00:38:07,910 --> 00:38:09,542
Wow, I...
922
00:38:09,667 --> 00:38:10,455
(school bell ringing)
Oh.
923
00:38:10,707 --> 00:38:11,666
Fue un año maravilloso.
924
00:38:11,791 --> 00:38:12,999
It was a beautiful year, everyone.
925
00:38:13,259 --> 00:38:14,417
Gracias.
Hey, de nada.
926
00:38:14,677 --> 00:38:16,461
Gracias.
(chuckles)
927
00:38:16,679 --> 00:38:18,840
Your teeth are like
fresh-driven snow white.
928
00:38:18,965 --> 00:38:20,506
Like Larry Bird white.
929
00:38:20,672 --> 00:38:22,427
(Will and David laugh)
930
00:38:22,552 --> 00:38:24,093
Most Improved.
931
00:38:24,259 --> 00:38:27,055
I don't think that's the award
a Spanish teacher wants to get
932
00:38:27,221 --> 00:38:28,466
in Spanish class.
933
00:38:28,591 --> 00:38:31,486
Will, man, you work hard,
you take care of your kids.
934
00:38:31,611 --> 00:38:33,102
They're very lucky to have you, man.
935
00:38:33,268 --> 00:38:34,939
They deserve better.
936
00:38:35,064 --> 00:38:36,147
They deserve you.
937
00:38:36,313 --> 00:38:38,650
Oh, so when do I start?
(laughs)
938
00:38:38,816 --> 00:38:40,568
How about Monday?
939
00:38:40,734 --> 00:38:41,979
I spoke to Figgins.
940
00:38:42,104 --> 00:38:44,315
I had all the kids go in
and talk to him, as well.
941
00:38:44,440 --> 00:38:47,075
They all want to take Spanish
if you're the teacher.
942
00:38:47,241 --> 00:38:49,011
What, he's offering me a job?
943
00:38:51,280 --> 00:38:52,290
Teaching?
944
00:38:52,415 --> 00:38:53,623
During the day?
945
00:38:53,789 --> 00:38:56,350
(chuckles):
I hope you're not a vampire.
946
00:38:56,959 --> 00:38:58,461
Oh, man.
947
00:38:58,627 --> 00:38:59,337
(laughs)
948
00:38:59,503 --> 00:39:01,255
Okay.
949
00:39:01,421 --> 00:39:03,883
Oh, man, you don...
you don't understand.
950
00:39:04,049 --> 00:39:05,551
My-My parents,
951
00:39:05,717 --> 00:39:07,439
my parents were immigrants.
952
00:39:07,564 --> 00:39:10,275
And they had to lie
about their citizenship
953
00:39:10,400 --> 00:39:12,227
to go to high school.
954
00:39:12,352 --> 00:39:14,529
And now I'm teaching it.
955
00:39:14,654 --> 00:39:16,187
It's the American Dream, right?
956
00:39:16,406 --> 00:39:17,689
Yeah.
(chuckles)
957
00:39:17,855 --> 00:39:19,451
But what about you?
958
00:39:19,576 --> 00:39:22,754
Oh, there's-there's an opening
in the History department.
959
00:39:22,879 --> 00:39:24,278
I've always loved history.
960
00:39:24,444 --> 00:39:26,114
Well, the History Channel, at least.
961
00:39:26,280 --> 00:39:28,533
- Right.
- Maybe I'll find my duende there.
962
00:39:28,699 --> 00:39:31,496
No, I've seen you, I've seen you
teach Glee Club, man.
963
00:39:31,621 --> 00:39:33,830
You have duende
coming out of your orejas.
964
00:39:34,955 --> 00:39:36,416
- Ears.
- Ears, right.
965
00:39:36,582 --> 00:39:37,702
I got you.
(laughs)
966
00:39:37,827 --> 00:39:38,876
Thank you so much.
967
00:39:39,042 --> 00:39:41,372
Thank you.
968
00:39:41,497 --> 00:39:44,507
So, wait a minute, who ended up
getting the tenure position?
969
00:39:48,844 --> 00:39:50,715
Thank you, Becky.
970
00:39:50,840 --> 00:39:53,985
My online pharmacist
has recommended these
971
00:39:54,110 --> 00:39:56,438
fertility injections every day,
twice a day,
972
00:39:56,563 --> 00:39:59,355
until Little Susie
or Little Sylvester catches.
973
00:39:59,521 --> 00:40:00,398
You down with that?
974
00:40:00,564 --> 00:40:01,899
No problem, Coach.
975
00:40:04,020 --> 00:40:05,194
What's wrong?
976
00:40:05,360 --> 00:40:07,488
Coach, I have a confession to make.
977
00:40:07,654 --> 00:40:09,117
Take a seat.
978
00:40:09,242 --> 00:40:10,533
Now, if this is about
979
00:40:10,699 --> 00:40:13,972
the complaint you lodged against
me with Principal Figgins,
980
00:40:14,097 --> 00:40:15,371
I already know.
981
00:40:15,537 --> 00:40:16,456
You do, Coach?
982
00:40:16,622 --> 00:40:17,692
Oh, Becky, I've known
983
00:40:17,817 --> 00:40:19,294
ever since
I tinker-tailor-soldier-spied
984
00:40:19,419 --> 00:40:21,419
my way into Figgins's
file cabinet and read
985
00:40:21,585 --> 00:40:22,462
the evaluation cards.
986
00:40:22,628 --> 00:40:23,681
And when I saw one
987
00:40:23,806 --> 00:40:25,150
written in crayon,
I knew it was either
988
00:40:25,275 --> 00:40:27,425
you or Brittany,
and you're the better speller.
989
00:40:27,591 --> 00:40:28,553
Coach, I'm sorry.
990
00:40:28,678 --> 00:40:30,094
I was just looking out for the team.
991
00:40:30,260 --> 00:40:33,691
Did you mean what you wrote?
992
00:40:33,816 --> 00:40:36,184
That you're worried I'm not
as focused on the Cheerios!
993
00:40:36,350 --> 00:40:37,769
as I used to be?
994
00:40:37,935 --> 00:40:39,397
Well, then you don't need be sorry.
995
00:40:39,522 --> 00:40:41,773
And thank you for the feedback.
996
00:40:41,939 --> 00:40:43,191
You're not mad?
997
00:40:43,357 --> 00:40:44,692
No, Becky.
998
00:40:44,858 --> 00:40:46,070
(sighs)
999
00:40:46,195 --> 00:40:49,822
But impending motherhood
doth given me perspective.
1000
00:40:49,988 --> 00:40:53,701
Oh, Becky, I'm reminded
of all my passions: winning,
1001
00:40:53,867 --> 00:40:54,994
my girls,
1002
00:40:55,160 --> 00:40:56,798
destroying my enemies.
1003
00:40:56,923 --> 00:40:58,466
Motherhood's not gonna change that.
1004
00:40:58,591 --> 00:41:01,209
If anything, it makes me
want them far more.
1005
00:41:01,375 --> 00:41:03,922
You're an excellent
co-captain, Becky.
1006
00:41:04,047 --> 00:41:05,713
You're like me.
1007
00:41:05,879 --> 00:41:07,509
Not afraid to make the tough calls.
1008
00:41:07,634 --> 00:41:08,883
Coach?
1009
00:41:09,049 --> 00:41:10,949
You're gonna be a great mom.
1010
00:41:22,312 --> 00:41:24,950
(school bell ringing)
1011
00:41:37,953 --> 00:41:39,874
There you are, baby.
You ready?
1012
00:41:39,999 --> 00:41:41,874
For lunch.
1013
00:41:42,040 --> 00:41:43,251
We're going off-campus, right?
1014
00:41:43,417 --> 00:41:44,919
Hey, Sam.
1015
00:41:57,567 --> 00:41:59,901
(school bell ringing faintly)
1016
00:42:05,191 --> 00:42:06,607
What's all this?
1017
00:42:11,781 --> 00:42:15,617
"So You Were A Jerk To Your Fiance."
1018
00:42:17,286 --> 00:42:20,746
Not particularly clever,
but I appreciate your pith.
1019
00:42:23,062 --> 00:42:25,710
(laughs):
"Congratulations... I Love You."
1020
00:42:25,876 --> 00:42:27,211
These are wonderful.
1021
00:42:27,377 --> 00:42:28,590
They're wonderful.
1022
00:42:28,715 --> 00:42:30,041
(both chuckle)
1023
00:42:30,166 --> 00:42:33,217
A little myopic maybe,
but a great first effort.
1024
00:42:37,056 --> 00:42:38,431
I'm so proud of you.
1025
00:42:38,674 --> 00:42:41,519
So do I call you Professor
or Madam or what?
1026
00:42:41,644 --> 00:42:43,237
I'm not sure of the protocol here.
1027
00:42:43,362 --> 00:42:44,522
No, no, no, it's just tenure.
1028
00:42:44,647 --> 00:42:45,773
You can call me Emma.
1029
00:42:45,898 --> 00:42:48,232
Or sweetheart
or cutie pie or doll-face.
1030
00:42:48,398 --> 00:42:49,393
- Or Professor Doll-Face.
- Ooh.
1031
00:42:49,518 --> 00:42:50,495
I like Professor Doll-Face.
1032
00:42:50,620 --> 00:42:52,695
(laughs)
1033
00:42:52,861 --> 00:42:54,065
(clears throat)
1034
00:42:54,190 --> 00:42:56,157
My first marriage didn't
work out because my wife
1035
00:42:56,323 --> 00:42:57,366
didn't believe in me.
1036
00:42:57,532 --> 00:43:01,287
And then I go and pull
the same crap on you.
1037
00:43:01,453 --> 00:43:05,259
All I know is that right now,
in this moment,
1038
00:43:05,384 --> 00:43:08,880
I just want it to stop.
1039
00:43:09,005 --> 00:43:13,132
I want to sit here, eat
some chicken and look back on
1040
00:43:13,298 --> 00:43:15,218
everything you've done
to get to this moment
1041
00:43:15,384 --> 00:43:19,256
and everything I'm going to do
from this moment on
1042
00:43:19,381 --> 00:43:23,851
to make sure you feel...
as special... and amazing
1043
00:43:24,017 --> 00:43:26,655
as I know you are.
1044
00:43:32,187 --> 00:43:34,820
Sync and correction by Mlmlte
www.addic7ed.com