1 00:00:01,584 --> 00:00:03,920 La cucaracha! 2 00:00:04,086 --> 00:00:07,424 Oh, oh! La cucaracha, la cucaracha 3 00:00:07,590 --> 00:00:09,134 Hey! Hey! 4 00:00:09,300 --> 00:00:11,511 Ya no puede caminar 5 00:00:11,677 --> 00:00:13,513 Porque le falta 6 00:00:13,679 --> 00:00:15,098 Porque le falta 7 00:00:15,264 --> 00:00:16,079 Hey! Hey! 8 00:00:16,204 --> 00:00:18,060 Marihuana que fumar 9 00:00:18,226 --> 00:00:20,312 Yo estoy harto de que me digan... 10 00:00:20,478 --> 00:00:23,174 WILL: I should have known by the looks on my students' faces 11 00:00:23,299 --> 00:00:24,858 that I'd really stepped in it. 12 00:00:25,024 --> 00:00:27,762 My yearly rendition of "La Cucaracha"on Taco Tuesday 13 00:00:27,887 --> 00:00:29,404 used to be such a hit. 14 00:00:29,570 --> 00:00:31,498 The truth is, I'm ashamed. 15 00:00:31,623 --> 00:00:33,450 To be a teacher is to offer students 16 00:00:33,616 --> 00:00:35,285 a gateway to the future, and I blew it. 17 00:00:35,511 --> 00:00:37,496 How could I have become so out of touch? 18 00:00:37,662 --> 00:00:39,440 (school bell ringing) 19 00:00:39,565 --> 00:00:40,608 William... 20 00:00:40,733 --> 00:00:42,009 What do you mean, you received complaints? 21 00:00:42,134 --> 00:00:44,178 - Who complained? - I can't tell you that. 22 00:00:44,303 --> 00:00:46,897 But I can tell you that your teaching skills 23 00:00:47,022 --> 00:00:49,317 have been seriously brought into question. 24 00:00:49,442 --> 00:00:51,485 Look, I-I know I'm not a native Spanish speaker. 25 00:00:51,610 --> 00:00:53,537 - Sometimes I get a little tripped up... - William. 26 00:00:53,662 --> 00:00:55,539 Will you please remove that enormous sombrero 27 00:00:55,664 --> 00:00:57,391 so I can break it down for you. 28 00:00:58,589 --> 00:01:01,144 As you may have heard, our history teacher, Mrs. Hagberg, 29 00:01:01,310 --> 00:01:03,271 has been forced into retirement 30 00:01:03,437 --> 00:01:04,690 due to some memory problems. 31 00:01:05,147 --> 00:01:09,069 And that's how Germany won the Second World War. 32 00:01:09,512 --> 00:01:11,780 Hagberg was a tenured teacher at this school 33 00:01:11,946 --> 00:01:13,156 for over 40 years. 34 00:01:13,432 --> 00:01:16,894 Her departure means there's an open tenured position 35 00:01:17,019 --> 00:01:18,161 here at McKinley. 36 00:01:18,327 --> 00:01:20,231 Oh, Principal Figgins... 37 00:01:20,356 --> 00:01:21,715 Emma and I just got engaged. 38 00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:24,000 We'll be starting a family soon. I need that tenure. 39 00:01:24,166 --> 00:01:26,336 And I would love to give it to you, William. 40 00:01:26,502 --> 00:01:28,356 But you're only one of several teachers 41 00:01:28,481 --> 00:01:30,549 I'm considering for this position. 42 00:01:30,715 --> 00:01:33,135 And to be frank, you have a public relations problem. 43 00:01:33,301 --> 00:01:34,761 If you want the tenure, 44 00:01:34,927 --> 00:01:36,096 you've got to turn it around in the class. 45 00:01:36,262 --> 00:01:38,014 O-Okay. How do I do that? 46 00:01:38,180 --> 00:01:39,233 You're a Spanish teacher. 47 00:01:39,358 --> 00:01:41,226 Maybe you should try learning Spanish. 48 00:01:42,476 --> 00:01:45,313 Sync and correction by Mlmlte www.addic7ed.com 49 00:01:45,479 --> 00:01:46,398 (school bell ringing) 50 00:01:46,564 --> 00:01:47,649 Señor Martinez? 51 00:01:49,421 --> 00:01:51,027 You can call me David. 52 00:01:51,193 --> 00:01:52,346 David, I am thrilled 53 00:01:52,471 --> 00:01:54,614 that Spanish has so many different ways to say 54 00:01:54,780 --> 00:01:57,802 "to be," but right now what I need to do 55 00:01:57,927 --> 00:01:59,920 is to learn how to say, 56 00:02:00,045 --> 00:02:02,789 "Stop using my toilet," to my maid. 57 00:02:02,955 --> 00:02:05,667 I was hoping you could tell me what the word "gordita" means. 58 00:02:05,833 --> 00:02:08,211 I know we're all here for different reasons. 59 00:02:08,377 --> 00:02:09,814 Most of you need your GEDs, 60 00:02:09,939 --> 00:02:11,840 some of you want to go to Cabo San Lucas 61 00:02:12,006 --> 00:02:13,341 and order like a local. 62 00:02:13,507 --> 00:02:16,386 But did you know that the U.S. census believe that by 2030 63 00:02:16,552 --> 00:02:18,805 the majority of Americans will use Spanish 64 00:02:18,971 --> 00:02:20,324 as their first language? 65 00:02:20,449 --> 00:02:22,276 You're not here learning a language. 66 00:02:22,401 --> 00:02:25,446 You're here 'cause you're smart. And you're forward thinkers. 67 00:02:25,571 --> 00:02:28,148 I'm sorry. I'm trying to listen, but you got some beautiful teeth. 68 00:02:28,314 --> 00:02:29,315 (chuckles) 69 00:02:38,917 --> 00:02:41,041 Asi que repiten conmigo. Come on, repeat with me. 70 00:02:51,212 --> 00:02:52,380 (school bell rings) 71 00:02:52,546 --> 00:02:53,840 DAVID: Very good. Thank you so much. 72 00:02:54,006 --> 00:02:55,826 Remember, roll those "R"s. (rolling "R"s) 73 00:02:55,951 --> 00:02:57,803 (rolling "R"s) Exactly. 74 00:02:57,969 --> 00:02:58,812 Hey, I'm Will Schuester. 75 00:02:58,937 --> 00:03:01,115 I teach Spanish here during the day. 76 00:03:01,240 --> 00:03:03,433 Can I buy you a cup of café? 77 00:03:03,599 --> 00:03:04,643 (laughing): Sure. 78 00:03:04,809 --> 00:03:07,562 There's something kind of fun and rebellious about being here at night. 79 00:03:07,728 --> 00:03:08,772 It's depressing. 80 00:03:09,647 --> 00:03:11,375 - No offense. - No. No, um... 81 00:03:11,500 --> 00:03:13,568 Why don't you get a job teaching regular high school? 82 00:03:13,734 --> 00:03:15,529 Have you seen the news? Budgets are being cut, 83 00:03:15,695 --> 00:03:17,155 there's a hiring freeze... 84 00:03:22,368 --> 00:03:24,412 You know, could you maybe say that a little slower? 85 00:03:24,578 --> 00:03:26,140 I think your accent's throwing me off. 86 00:03:26,265 --> 00:03:27,601 - Where you from? - Ohio. 87 00:03:27,869 --> 00:03:29,393 But my parents are from Chile, 88 00:03:29,518 --> 00:03:31,253 and we only spoke Spanish in the house, growing up. 89 00:03:31,419 --> 00:03:32,680 Oh. 90 00:03:32,805 --> 00:03:34,756 How-how long have you been, uh, working here? 91 00:03:34,922 --> 00:03:36,617 Just a few months. This is... 92 00:03:36,742 --> 00:03:38,702 actually the beginning of my career change. 93 00:03:38,827 --> 00:03:41,429 For the last six years, I was a tooth model. 94 00:03:41,595 --> 00:03:44,391 It's like a hand model, but with your teeth. 95 00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:46,434 Man, your teeth are really white. 96 00:03:46,600 --> 00:03:49,354 Yeah, no coffee, no cigarettes, no beets. 97 00:03:49,520 --> 00:03:50,798 I was the top tooth model in the country. 98 00:03:50,923 --> 00:03:53,334 Colgate, Crest Whitestrips, Sensodyne... 99 00:03:53,459 --> 00:03:54,568 Whenever they needed a smile for their advertisement, 100 00:03:54,734 --> 00:03:56,278 they would call on Dave Martinez. 101 00:03:56,444 --> 00:03:58,222 Wow, that sounds like a great gig. 102 00:03:58,347 --> 00:04:00,090 What... why'd you stop? 103 00:04:00,364 --> 00:04:01,475 Well, one day I... 104 00:04:01,600 --> 00:04:04,094 I realized I was spending so much time flossing, I... 105 00:04:04,219 --> 00:04:06,454 I was missing my life. I want to make a difference 106 00:04:06,620 --> 00:04:07,914 that lasts longer than a grin, you know? 107 00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:10,384 I-I want to teach kids. 108 00:04:10,509 --> 00:04:13,070 I want to give them something useful. 109 00:04:13,195 --> 00:04:15,630 Something they can... they can take with them 110 00:04:15,796 --> 00:04:16,923 their whole lives. 111 00:04:17,089 --> 00:04:18,425 I want to help them find their duende. 112 00:04:18,591 --> 00:04:20,778 - You know duende, right? - Of course. 113 00:04:20,903 --> 00:04:22,496 Duende, yeah. 114 00:04:22,621 --> 00:04:24,398 Now, you also teach Glee Club, right? 115 00:04:24,523 --> 00:04:26,683 - I do. - You see, that's... that's inspiring. 116 00:04:26,849 --> 00:04:29,587 I actually wanted to try forming the night school Glee Club, 117 00:04:29,712 --> 00:04:31,688 but meeting after school means 2:00 in the morning. 118 00:04:31,854 --> 00:04:33,732 - Ah, right. - (laughs) I love to sing. 119 00:04:34,380 --> 00:04:37,527 I actually learned English watching reruns of Solid Gold. 120 00:04:37,693 --> 00:04:38,612 Wait. You're serious? 121 00:04:38,778 --> 00:04:40,247 Yeah. They-they've done studies on it. 122 00:04:40,372 --> 00:04:42,933 The brain takes in information, like a new language, 123 00:04:43,058 --> 00:04:45,586 or a math equation, much more quickly 124 00:04:45,711 --> 00:04:47,579 and retains it better, when that information 125 00:04:47,745 --> 00:04:49,089 is delivered through music. 126 00:04:49,214 --> 00:04:52,500 Well, there's a lot of duende involved, too. 127 00:04:53,918 --> 00:04:55,587 You know what I would do if I was teaching Glee Club? 128 00:04:55,753 --> 00:04:57,422 Latin music. Think about it. 129 00:04:57,588 --> 00:04:59,132 You get those kids singing in Spanish, 130 00:04:59,298 --> 00:05:00,367 and they'll be learning the language 131 00:05:00,492 --> 00:05:02,369 without even realizing it. 132 00:05:02,494 --> 00:05:04,989 WILL: If I could have some of my Glee kids speaking Spanish 133 00:05:05,114 --> 00:05:07,675 by the end of the week, it'd be a hell of an accomplishment. 134 00:05:07,800 --> 00:05:10,018 That's Teacher of the Year stuff. 135 00:05:10,184 --> 00:05:12,228 Twice a day, you boys stain 136 00:05:12,394 --> 00:05:14,940 your mother's drapes, or befoul a gym sock 137 00:05:15,106 --> 00:05:16,775 that has to jump from the hamper straight into therapy. 138 00:05:17,042 --> 00:05:18,752 SUE: Why not head on down to the clinic, 139 00:05:18,877 --> 00:05:21,279 and put your virile teen years to good use? 140 00:05:21,445 --> 00:05:23,123 You'll have five bucks more than when you walked in, 141 00:05:23,248 --> 00:05:25,992 and the gratitude of lonely ovaries everywhere. 142 00:05:26,158 --> 00:05:26,952 But not you. 143 00:05:27,118 --> 00:05:28,954 You can keep tossing your tissues into the trash. 144 00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:30,080 I was in an accident. 145 00:05:30,246 --> 00:05:32,499 Still. Same goes for you, Porcelain. 146 00:05:32,665 --> 00:05:34,584 Let the strangeness end with you. 147 00:05:34,750 --> 00:05:36,753 What's going on, Sue? 148 00:05:37,707 --> 00:05:39,714 Well, William, I'm just trying to instill 149 00:05:39,880 --> 00:05:41,591 the spirit of giving in your students. 150 00:05:41,757 --> 00:05:44,161 No, honestly, I, uh... 151 00:05:44,286 --> 00:05:47,331 was a little bit dismayed by the quality of men 152 00:05:47,456 --> 00:05:49,516 holding Dixie cups down at the sperm bank 153 00:05:49,682 --> 00:05:50,934 this morning. 154 00:05:51,100 --> 00:05:52,286 Zero viable options. 155 00:05:52,411 --> 00:05:54,688 Looked like the cast from Ice Road Truckers. 156 00:05:54,854 --> 00:05:57,691 So I thought it'd be best if I found a sperm donor here. 157 00:05:58,357 --> 00:06:00,026 H-Hold on a second. You're serious? 158 00:06:00,192 --> 00:06:01,679 Yes, William. 159 00:06:01,804 --> 00:06:03,822 I have decided to have a child. 160 00:06:03,988 --> 00:06:05,473 (laughs) 161 00:06:07,032 --> 00:06:08,302 Um, wow. 162 00:06:08,427 --> 00:06:10,537 I guess I just never saw you as the mothering type. 163 00:06:10,703 --> 00:06:12,273 Well, I resent that, William. 164 00:06:12,398 --> 00:06:14,416 I have a very strong mothering instinct. 165 00:06:14,582 --> 00:06:16,167 I had it with my sister. 166 00:06:16,333 --> 00:06:17,645 I have it with Becky Jackson. 167 00:06:17,770 --> 00:06:20,981 I like to think I play a parenting role in her life. 168 00:06:21,106 --> 00:06:24,818 And like so many women who chose career over family, 169 00:06:24,943 --> 00:06:27,679 I've decided to take my life in a different direction 170 00:06:27,845 --> 00:06:30,574 while there's still time. 171 00:06:30,699 --> 00:06:31,933 Are you sure that's even possible? 172 00:06:32,099 --> 00:06:34,161 Yes, William, I am sure. 173 00:06:34,286 --> 00:06:37,856 You see, I had my eggs frozen in the late '70s. 174 00:06:38,022 --> 00:06:40,483 They didn't even have that technology in the late '70s. 175 00:06:40,649 --> 00:06:42,944 I know. I did it myself. 176 00:06:43,178 --> 00:06:46,281 The good people at Kroger have been keeping a box 177 00:06:46,447 --> 00:06:48,058 of my championship ova 178 00:06:48,183 --> 00:06:49,534 cooling in their meat locker. 179 00:06:49,700 --> 00:06:50,952 And what with the financial security 180 00:06:51,118 --> 00:06:53,538 that will be afforded me by the end of the week... 181 00:06:53,704 --> 00:06:55,832 I am finally ready 182 00:06:55,998 --> 00:06:58,185 to start a family. 183 00:06:58,310 --> 00:06:59,820 Now, I don't know if you've heard, William, 184 00:06:59,945 --> 00:07:01,046 but there's a tenured position 185 00:07:01,212 --> 00:07:02,714 opening up at our school. 186 00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:05,091 - And I'm a shoe-in. - Wait, wait, wait, wait. 187 00:07:05,257 --> 00:07:07,778 What makes you so sure you're the one who's gonna get tenure? 188 00:07:08,052 --> 00:07:09,279 Seniority, William. 189 00:07:09,404 --> 00:07:11,639 I'm first in line, and also, I'm a proven champion. 190 00:07:11,805 --> 00:07:15,669 And now seeing as how I find bald infants terrifying, 191 00:07:15,794 --> 00:07:17,738 I'm going to need a few ounces of your baby gravy 192 00:07:17,863 --> 00:07:20,648 to ensure Sue Sylvester Jr. is born with a full head of hair. 193 00:07:20,814 --> 00:07:22,358 Coach? 194 00:07:22,524 --> 00:07:25,361 Principal Figgins wants to see you in his office. 195 00:07:26,037 --> 00:07:28,766 Looks like I got my tenure. 196 00:07:28,891 --> 00:07:31,251 Cheerleading magazines are right here. 197 00:07:31,376 --> 00:07:33,210 Have fun. 198 00:07:37,957 --> 00:07:39,443 Complaints? 199 00:07:39,568 --> 00:07:41,945 Who's complaining about my teaching style? 200 00:07:42,211 --> 00:07:44,097 I can't tell you that, Sue. 201 00:07:44,222 --> 00:07:45,949 A student who shall remain anonymous. 202 00:07:46,215 --> 00:07:47,865 Well, then, who's this? 203 00:07:48,527 --> 00:07:50,595 Sue, this is the talented and enchanting 204 00:07:50,761 --> 00:07:52,764 Olympian Roz Washington. 205 00:07:52,930 --> 00:07:53,973 Coach of the McKinley 206 00:07:54,139 --> 00:07:55,942 synchronized swimming team. 207 00:07:56,067 --> 00:07:58,311 Roz approached me with some constructive criticism 208 00:07:58,477 --> 00:07:59,797 about your lagging Cheerios! 209 00:07:59,922 --> 00:08:01,281 Why should I listen to this woman 210 00:08:01,406 --> 00:08:02,649 give me notes 211 00:08:02,815 --> 00:08:03,942 about my Cheerios? 212 00:08:04,108 --> 00:08:06,152 Because Cheerios! didn't win Nationals last year, Sue. 213 00:08:06,318 --> 00:08:09,364 And remember, you're on my short list for the tenured position. 214 00:08:09,530 --> 00:08:11,241 And tenured teachers are team players. 215 00:08:11,407 --> 00:08:13,868 Well, let me tell you why ticket sales are down 216 00:08:14,034 --> 00:08:15,013 at sporting events. 217 00:08:15,138 --> 00:08:18,748 This school got cheerleaders doing broke-ass moves from the 1950s. 218 00:08:18,914 --> 00:08:20,625 - Hm. - Why don't you just admit 219 00:08:20,791 --> 00:08:23,187 that you're past your competitive edge, Sue Sylvester, 220 00:08:23,312 --> 00:08:24,295 and let this young 221 00:08:24,461 --> 00:08:28,299 bronze-medal winner add some crunk 222 00:08:28,465 --> 00:08:30,201 to the ba-dunk-a-dunk? 223 00:08:32,594 --> 00:08:34,173 (school bell ringing) 224 00:08:34,298 --> 00:08:35,416 WILL: All right, guys! 225 00:08:35,541 --> 00:08:36,808 Let me ask you something. 226 00:08:36,974 --> 00:08:39,978 Where do you think you'll be in the year 2030? 227 00:08:40,144 --> 00:08:41,813 RACHEL & KURT: Broadway. Twinsies! 228 00:08:41,979 --> 00:08:43,398 Walking. 229 00:08:43,564 --> 00:08:44,691 In jail, or dead. Or both. 230 00:08:44,857 --> 00:08:46,067 WILL: Wherever you are, 231 00:08:46,233 --> 00:08:48,486 whatever you're doing, you're going to need to be able 232 00:08:48,652 --> 00:08:49,529 to speak Spanish. 233 00:08:49,695 --> 00:08:52,240 The reality is, by 2030, more people on this planet 234 00:08:52,558 --> 00:08:54,784 will be speaking Spanish than any other language. 235 00:08:54,950 --> 00:08:56,786 The world is changing. Our culture is changing. 236 00:08:56,952 --> 00:08:58,705 And that needs to be reflected in here. 237 00:08:58,871 --> 00:09:00,373 So for our next assignment, we're only doing songs 238 00:09:00,539 --> 00:09:04,228 written or performed by someone Latin, or of Latin descent. 239 00:09:04,353 --> 00:09:06,153 Or English songs performed bilingually. 240 00:09:06,420 --> 00:09:07,547 Ooh, I'm bilingual. 241 00:09:07,806 --> 00:09:10,067 , Mr. Shue, though I love that we're finally getting 242 00:09:10,192 --> 00:09:12,927 all Lima Sound Machine in here, why now? 243 00:09:13,093 --> 00:09:14,971 Oh, Santana, because it's long overdue. 244 00:09:15,137 --> 00:09:17,865 The truth is, I love all things Latin. 245 00:09:19,266 --> 00:09:20,268 I mean, I love Latin food, 246 00:09:20,434 --> 00:09:21,662 Latin art, Latin people... 247 00:09:21,787 --> 00:09:23,788 You don't know any Latin people. (knocking) 248 00:09:29,985 --> 00:09:31,863 I know. Um... Guys, this is David Martinez. 249 00:09:32,029 --> 00:09:32,947 David Martinez, this is the Glee Club. 250 00:09:33,113 --> 00:09:33,990 RACHEL: Oh, my God. 251 00:09:34,156 --> 00:09:35,491 - Cutest... - smile... 252 00:09:35,657 --> 00:09:36,658 ever. 253 00:09:37,201 --> 00:09:39,346 Hello, everyone. 254 00:09:39,471 --> 00:09:40,413 It's a pleasure. 255 00:09:40,579 --> 00:09:41,915 WILL: David here is one of my 256 00:09:42,081 --> 00:09:44,101 many Latin friends. 257 00:09:44,226 --> 00:09:46,436 And, uh, he's interested in starting his own 258 00:09:46,561 --> 00:09:48,555 night school Glee Club, after hours. 259 00:09:48,680 --> 00:09:52,258 So, uh, I invited him to come watch us get our duende on. 260 00:09:52,424 --> 00:09:53,551 Duende? 261 00:09:53,717 --> 00:09:55,053 It means "dwarf," you ass. 262 00:09:56,011 --> 00:09:57,639 Now I'm completely confused. So what's the assignment? 263 00:09:57,856 --> 00:10:01,118 To sing, in Spanish, with duende. 264 00:10:01,243 --> 00:10:03,186 Which, yes, literally means "dwarf," 265 00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:04,914 but metaphorically, it means 266 00:10:05,039 --> 00:10:07,007 to have Spanish soul. 267 00:10:07,132 --> 00:10:09,877 To be filled with Spanish passion. 268 00:10:10,002 --> 00:10:11,110 Will, can I... 269 00:10:11,369 --> 00:10:13,547 - Hablar con ellos? - That's... right. 270 00:10:13,672 --> 00:10:16,866 A performance with duende transforms you. 271 00:10:17,032 --> 00:10:20,745 Makes you sing, makes you cry, makes you laugh. 272 00:10:20,911 --> 00:10:22,497 Makes you want to kiss a person you love. 273 00:10:22,663 --> 00:10:25,333 A song sung in Spanish must have duende, 274 00:10:25,499 --> 00:10:26,876 or else... 275 00:10:27,042 --> 00:10:29,254 - Would you mind showing us? - Oh dear God, please, yes. 276 00:10:30,272 --> 00:10:31,589 Be my guest. 277 00:10:31,907 --> 00:10:34,592 Okay. Well, I'm-I'm not a professional like you guys, 278 00:10:34,758 --> 00:10:36,552 - but I'll give it a go. - All right. 279 00:10:36,718 --> 00:10:37,553 Now, guys, uh... 280 00:10:37,719 --> 00:10:40,123 remember, Mr. Martinez is here as our guest, okay? 281 00:10:40,248 --> 00:10:42,725 Let's create a safe and supportive environment. 282 00:10:42,891 --> 00:10:44,619 Uno, dos, tres, cuatro! 283 00:10:44,744 --> 00:10:46,813 (LMFAO's "Sexy and I Know It" begins) 284 00:10:46,979 --> 00:10:48,106 (kids whoop) 285 00:10:51,460 --> 00:10:52,402 Yeah! 286 00:10:52,568 --> 00:10:54,237 Yeah. 287 00:10:54,403 --> 00:10:55,672 Cuando salgo a andar 288 00:10:55,797 --> 00:10:57,824 The girls be looking, like, "Ahi esta" 289 00:10:57,990 --> 00:10:59,292 Yo se I got it aqui 290 00:10:59,417 --> 00:11:01,119 Walking down the street in my new La Freak, yeah 291 00:11:01,285 --> 00:11:02,829 This is how I roll 292 00:11:02,995 --> 00:11:04,956 Animal print pants, fuera de control 293 00:11:05,122 --> 00:11:06,332 And check me out con mi big Afro 294 00:11:06,498 --> 00:11:08,668 Y como Bruce Lee, right, got the glow, yo 295 00:11:08,834 --> 00:11:10,295 Girl, look at that body 296 00:11:10,461 --> 00:11:12,046 Girl, look at that body 297 00:11:12,212 --> 00:11:13,881 Girl, look at that body 298 00:11:14,047 --> 00:11:15,925 I-I-I work out 299 00:11:16,091 --> 00:11:17,911 Girl, look at that body 300 00:11:18,036 --> 00:11:19,429 Girl, look at that body 301 00:11:19,595 --> 00:11:21,806 Girl, look at that body 302 00:11:21,972 --> 00:11:22,983 I-I-I work out 303 00:11:23,108 --> 00:11:24,309 Cuando hago mi entrada 304 00:11:24,475 --> 00:11:26,086 - Yeah - This is what I see 305 00:11:26,211 --> 00:11:27,228 Okay 306 00:11:27,445 --> 00:11:29,873 Todo el mundo para pa'mirarme a mi 307 00:11:29,998 --> 00:11:31,733 I got passion in my pants 308 00:11:31,899 --> 00:11:34,094 And I ain't afraid to show it 309 00:11:34,219 --> 00:11:36,096 Show it, show it, show it 310 00:11:36,221 --> 00:11:39,623 I'm sexy and I know it 311 00:11:41,241 --> 00:11:43,870 (laughter, cheering) 312 00:11:44,036 --> 00:11:45,963 Soy sexy y lo sabes 313 00:11:52,503 --> 00:11:54,314 Yo, vacilón en el mall 314 00:11:54,439 --> 00:11:56,090 Security just can't fight them off 315 00:11:56,324 --> 00:11:58,760 Hanging out at the beach, I'm in a G-stro 316 00:11:59,077 --> 00:12:00,370 - Trying to tan my cheeks - What? 317 00:12:00,495 --> 00:12:01,763 This is how I roll 318 00:12:01,997 --> 00:12:03,457 Vamos, ladies, it's time to go 319 00:12:03,582 --> 00:12:05,224 Nos fuimos pa'el bar, baby, go, look suave 320 00:12:05,450 --> 00:12:07,769 No shoes, no shirt, como quiera me sirven, what? 321 00:12:07,935 --> 00:12:09,854 Girl, look at that body 322 00:12:10,020 --> 00:12:11,898 Girl, look at that body 323 00:12:12,064 --> 00:12:13,149 Girl, look at that body 324 00:12:13,315 --> 00:12:14,484 I-I-I work out 325 00:12:14,760 --> 00:12:16,861 - Cuando hago mi entrada - Yeah 326 00:12:17,027 --> 00:12:18,488 - This is what I see - Okay 327 00:12:19,112 --> 00:12:21,532 Todo el mundo para pa'mirarme a mi 328 00:12:21,698 --> 00:12:23,844 I got passion in my pants 329 00:12:23,969 --> 00:12:26,829 And I ain't afraid to show it, show it, show it 330 00:12:26,995 --> 00:12:28,623 Show it 331 00:12:28,789 --> 00:12:31,292 I'm sexy and I know it 332 00:12:31,458 --> 00:12:32,919 Hey 333 00:12:33,085 --> 00:12:34,862 Check it out 334 00:12:36,838 --> 00:12:38,508 Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, yeah 335 00:12:38,674 --> 00:12:40,577 Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, yeah 336 00:12:40,702 --> 00:12:42,412 Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, yeah 337 00:12:42,537 --> 00:12:44,263 Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, yeah, yeah 338 00:12:44,429 --> 00:12:46,432 Do the wiggle, man 339 00:12:46,598 --> 00:12:48,851 Es el maneo, man 340 00:12:49,017 --> 00:12:49,852 Yeah 341 00:12:50,018 --> 00:12:52,647 Soy sexy y lo sabes 342 00:12:52,813 --> 00:12:53,815 Girl, look at that body 343 00:12:54,032 --> 00:12:55,900 Girl, look at that body 344 00:12:56,066 --> 00:12:57,485 Girl, look at that body 345 00:12:57,651 --> 00:12:58,653 I-I-I work out 346 00:12:58,819 --> 00:13:01,072 Girl, look at that body 347 00:13:01,238 --> 00:13:02,740 Girl, look at that body 348 00:13:02,906 --> 00:13:04,575 Girl, look at that body 349 00:13:04,741 --> 00:13:06,060 I-I-I work out 350 00:13:13,125 --> 00:13:15,028 I'm sexy and I know it. 351 00:13:15,153 --> 00:13:17,188 (cheering and applause) Yeah! 352 00:13:23,594 --> 00:13:25,388 {pub}Here is the problem. Sam and I used to date. 353 00:13:25,554 --> 00:13:28,182 Then I moved away, and now I'm bunking at Finn and Kurt's. 354 00:13:28,348 --> 00:13:30,643 And I started dating another guy who I really like. 355 00:13:30,809 --> 00:13:32,478 But then she and I kissed. 356 00:13:32,644 --> 00:13:33,980 And I feel really weird about it. 357 00:13:34,205 --> 00:13:35,314 Just trying to figure out a way 358 00:13:35,480 --> 00:13:37,567 to work this out without anyone's feelings getting hurt. 359 00:13:37,733 --> 00:13:38,868 Actually, you're in luck 360 00:13:38,993 --> 00:13:41,153 because I just got my new series of pamphlets 361 00:13:41,278 --> 00:13:42,947 back from the printer, which uniquely address 362 00:13:43,113 --> 00:13:44,991 the modern-day issues of today's 21st century teen. 363 00:13:45,157 --> 00:13:47,410 Yes. Okay. 364 00:13:47,576 --> 00:13:49,169 Mm-hmm. 365 00:13:51,204 --> 00:13:52,415 "So You're a Two-Timin' Ho"? 366 00:13:52,581 --> 00:13:53,583 "So You're Dating a Two-Timin' Ho." 367 00:13:53,749 --> 00:13:55,613 Right? They get your attention, don't they? 368 00:13:55,738 --> 00:13:57,879 I mean, that... that really makes you want to read on. 369 00:13:58,045 --> 00:13:59,505 Miss Pillsbury, I don't sleep around. 370 00:13:59,630 --> 00:14:00,840 That's not me. 371 00:14:01,006 --> 00:14:03,050 - Okay. - I'm just trying to listen to my heart, 372 00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:05,887 and it's like I can't hear what it's trying to tell me. 373 00:14:06,237 --> 00:14:07,980 Well, if you really want to listen, 374 00:14:08,105 --> 00:14:09,724 then you need to stop talking. 375 00:14:09,890 --> 00:14:11,392 I'm serious. 376 00:14:11,558 --> 00:14:13,235 You know, there's a lot of communication 377 00:14:13,360 --> 00:14:14,537 in your lives these days. 378 00:14:14,662 --> 00:14:16,322 With texting and IM'ing and Facebooking, 379 00:14:16,447 --> 00:14:17,982 I mean, you don't have any quiet time 380 00:14:18,148 --> 00:14:20,025 with yourselves to make informed decisions 381 00:14:20,192 --> 00:14:21,994 on... on your true feelings. 382 00:14:22,119 --> 00:14:23,129 (cell phone chiming) 383 00:14:23,254 --> 00:14:24,322 For instance. 384 00:14:24,488 --> 00:14:25,498 (chirping) 385 00:14:25,623 --> 00:14:27,241 Sam just tweeted that I smell good. 386 00:14:27,407 --> 00:14:29,035 I won't stop till it's trending. 387 00:14:29,201 --> 00:14:30,519 This is my point. 388 00:14:30,644 --> 00:14:32,588 I think that you and Sam should spend a week 389 00:14:32,713 --> 00:14:33,998 not speaking to each other. 390 00:14:34,164 --> 00:14:35,625 No e-mails, no texts, nothing. 391 00:14:35,791 --> 00:14:37,543 And I think, at the end of that week, 392 00:14:37,668 --> 00:14:39,086 you'll have a much better idea of what 393 00:14:39,252 --> 00:14:40,254 your true feelings are. 394 00:14:40,420 --> 00:14:41,597 Shh, shh. No. No. 395 00:14:41,722 --> 00:14:44,175 Starting... starting... 396 00:14:44,341 --> 00:14:45,892 now. (school bell ringing) 397 00:14:47,260 --> 00:14:48,270 Hooray. 398 00:14:48,395 --> 00:14:50,014 Not speaking. 399 00:14:50,180 --> 00:14:51,933 (rhythmic dance music playing) 400 00:14:59,790 --> 00:15:00,942 Whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo 401 00:15:04,545 --> 00:15:06,505 Like dang diggy diggy d-dang a-dang dang 402 00:15:06,630 --> 00:15:07,949 Diggy dang a-diggy d-dang dang 403 00:15:08,215 --> 00:15:09,925 Diggy diggy diggy d-dang a-dang dang 404 00:15:10,050 --> 00:15:11,369 Diggy dang a-diggy d-dang dang 405 00:15:11,535 --> 00:15:13,129 Dang diggy diggy d-dang a-dang dang 406 00:15:13,254 --> 00:15:15,081 Diggy dang a-diggy d-dang dang 407 00:15:15,247 --> 00:15:17,083 Dang diggy diggy d-dang 408 00:15:17,374 --> 00:15:19,794 Dang diggy diggy d-dang. 409 00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:21,087 (cheering and applause) 410 00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:22,638 All right, ladies. 411 00:15:22,763 --> 00:15:26,634 Go run and find a swimming hole to dunk those behinds in 412 00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:29,617 'cause those donkey booties need to cool off. 413 00:15:31,655 --> 00:15:34,116 Now, I ain't no mind reader, Sue Sylvester, 414 00:15:34,241 --> 00:15:37,570 and I came from a very superstitious household 415 00:15:37,695 --> 00:15:40,064 where such things are not allowed, 416 00:15:40,230 --> 00:15:42,958 but I got a feeling that those Cheerios! 417 00:15:43,083 --> 00:15:46,195 like my modern dance moves a little bit better 418 00:15:46,361 --> 00:15:47,997 than them old stale white-bread routines 419 00:15:48,122 --> 00:15:49,490 you've been making them do. 420 00:15:49,656 --> 00:15:51,534 You know, Roz, 421 00:15:51,700 --> 00:15:54,503 the English language lacks the requisite words 422 00:15:54,628 --> 00:15:57,956 to express just how much I dislike you. 423 00:15:58,123 --> 00:15:59,375 And I'm onto you. 424 00:15:59,541 --> 00:16:00,976 Yeah, I've seen All About Eve. 425 00:16:01,101 --> 00:16:02,762 I know what you're planning. 426 00:16:02,887 --> 00:16:05,214 You're waiting for me to take maternity leave, 427 00:16:05,380 --> 00:16:08,092 and then you're going to swoop in and try to steal my job. 428 00:16:08,258 --> 00:16:10,135 Hold up. Hold up. Hold up. Wait. 429 00:16:10,260 --> 00:16:11,570 Oh, my God. Hold up. 430 00:16:11,695 --> 00:16:13,239 Maternity leave? 431 00:16:13,364 --> 00:16:14,890 Are you pulling my leg? 432 00:16:15,056 --> 00:16:16,325 No, I am not. 433 00:16:16,450 --> 00:16:19,770 I am getting pregnant, and then I am having a baby. 434 00:16:19,936 --> 00:16:21,063 With whose vagina? 435 00:16:21,229 --> 00:16:23,399 Sue, you can't have no baby. 436 00:16:23,565 --> 00:16:25,067 You are old as a hill. 437 00:16:25,233 --> 00:16:27,369 You ain't gonna give birth to no child. 438 00:16:27,494 --> 00:16:29,321 You gonna give birth to a grandchild. 439 00:16:29,446 --> 00:16:31,257 You gonna get in them stirrups, 440 00:16:31,382 --> 00:16:33,843 and you gonna push and push, 441 00:16:33,968 --> 00:16:35,661 and a full-grown adult gonna pop out 442 00:16:35,786 --> 00:16:38,205 with a briefcase and a job talking on a cell phone. 443 00:16:38,371 --> 00:16:39,457 And by the way, I don't need 444 00:16:39,623 --> 00:16:43,085 to steal your job, Sue Sylvester. 445 00:16:43,251 --> 00:16:44,211 You know why? 446 00:16:44,377 --> 00:16:46,714 Principal Figgins is gonna give it to me. 447 00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:48,307 He wouldn't. 448 00:16:48,432 --> 00:16:50,943 Oh, he would. 449 00:16:51,068 --> 00:16:52,928 You see, a long time ago, 450 00:16:53,094 --> 00:16:54,730 you won some trophies. 451 00:16:54,855 --> 00:16:56,724 And that was real impressive. 452 00:16:56,890 --> 00:16:59,702 I, however, am an Olympian. 453 00:16:59,827 --> 00:17:02,521 I won this bronze damn Olympic medal 454 00:17:02,687 --> 00:17:04,190 in Beijing, China. 455 00:17:04,356 --> 00:17:05,691 I had noodles with the president 456 00:17:05,816 --> 00:17:07,485 and a threesome with Michael Phelps. 457 00:17:07,651 --> 00:17:08,694 What you need to do 458 00:17:08,919 --> 00:17:10,796 is wake up and smell the menopause. 459 00:17:11,144 --> 00:17:14,032 You are... done... as a coach, 460 00:17:14,157 --> 00:17:16,135 and all the hormones in Thailand 461 00:17:16,260 --> 00:17:18,371 can't change the fact that you are done as a woman. 462 00:17:18,537 --> 00:17:20,673 What you need to do is start praying 463 00:17:20,798 --> 00:17:22,375 that you give birth to a child 464 00:17:22,541 --> 00:17:24,093 that likes to eat sand, 465 00:17:24,218 --> 00:17:27,020 'cause that's all that's coming out those old, wrinkly boobs. 466 00:17:30,006 --> 00:17:32,484 I can do this. 467 00:17:32,609 --> 00:17:34,694 I can do anything. 468 00:17:36,429 --> 00:17:38,197 ♪ 469 00:17:44,187 --> 00:17:46,448 How is the girl with no ass supposed to choose 470 00:17:46,573 --> 00:17:49,694 between the juiced-up wolf and the depressed vampire? 471 00:17:49,860 --> 00:17:50,920 She's into both of them. 472 00:17:51,045 --> 00:17:53,122 Oh, come on, Mercedes. She just knows. 473 00:17:53,452 --> 00:17:55,758 But what if they both make her feel amazing in different ways? 474 00:17:55,883 --> 00:17:58,177 Well, you don't get to choose when it comes to true love. 475 00:17:58,302 --> 00:17:59,511 True love chooses you. 476 00:17:59,636 --> 00:18:01,513 And you better be certain when it comes to marriage 477 00:18:01,638 --> 00:18:03,405 because marriage is promise, and it lasts for forever. 478 00:18:03,530 --> 00:18:04,767 Ladies, I appreciate you spending time 479 00:18:04,892 --> 00:18:06,101 with me while Blaine recovers, 480 00:18:06,226 --> 00:18:08,212 but why are you being so weird and serious? 481 00:18:08,378 --> 00:18:10,396 Our periods don't come until the end of the month. 482 00:18:15,486 --> 00:18:16,395 (TV shuts off) 483 00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:18,097 Can you guys keep a secret? 484 00:18:22,726 --> 00:18:24,145 Rachel, what the hell is that? 485 00:18:24,311 --> 00:18:25,688 It's an engagement ring. 486 00:18:25,854 --> 00:18:27,398 Shut up! 487 00:18:27,564 --> 00:18:28,607 Finn proposed. 488 00:18:28,773 --> 00:18:30,693 - And what did you say? - I said yes. 489 00:18:30,859 --> 00:18:31,986 Rachel, have you lost your damn mind? 490 00:18:32,152 --> 00:18:33,738 But I love Finn. I really, really love him. 491 00:18:33,904 --> 00:18:35,547 - But what about NYADA? - It's still going to happen. 492 00:18:35,672 --> 00:18:37,082 I have dreams for a huge life 493 00:18:37,207 --> 00:18:38,492 for myself, okay, some of which include, 494 00:18:38,658 --> 00:18:39,952 you know, a little bit of struggle 495 00:18:40,077 --> 00:18:42,004 until I can make all of my dreams come true. 496 00:18:42,129 --> 00:18:44,289 They'll be great anecdotes for the Jimmy Kimmel show. 497 00:18:44,414 --> 00:18:45,958 I'll call them my Top Ramen weeks. 498 00:18:46,124 --> 00:18:48,085 But in every single one of my dreams... 499 00:18:48,302 --> 00:18:50,963 okay, struggling or not... there he is. 500 00:18:51,088 --> 00:18:52,506 Finn. 501 00:18:52,672 --> 00:18:54,767 Look, I know that I am going to be with Finn 502 00:18:54,892 --> 00:18:56,735 for the rest of my life, just as much as I know 503 00:18:56,860 --> 00:18:59,510 that I am going to be a huge star one day. 504 00:19:00,364 --> 00:19:01,932 So you promise not to tell anyone? 505 00:19:02,098 --> 00:19:03,976 Okay, I'm going home right now to yell at Finn, 506 00:19:04,101 --> 00:19:05,436 because this is insane. 507 00:19:05,602 --> 00:19:07,354 That is not fair, Kurt. I mean, what would 508 00:19:07,520 --> 00:19:09,023 you do if Blaine proposed to you today? 509 00:19:12,609 --> 00:19:14,069 So will you please keep my secret? 510 00:19:14,235 --> 00:19:16,781 Aren't you scared you're making the wrong choice? 511 00:19:16,997 --> 00:19:20,659 Look, I know that I have the right person. 512 00:19:20,784 --> 00:19:24,205 Scary part was just... choosing to know it. 513 00:19:24,421 --> 00:19:26,215 (Gloria Estefan's "Don't Wanna Lose You" begins) 514 00:19:26,340 --> 00:19:30,252 Sometimes it's hard 515 00:19:32,262 --> 00:19:36,300 To make things clear 516 00:19:38,352 --> 00:19:41,514 Or know when to face the truth 517 00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:43,432 And I know 518 00:19:43,598 --> 00:19:47,144 That the moment is here 519 00:19:49,980 --> 00:19:54,360 So open your eyes 520 00:19:55,586 --> 00:20:00,783 And see who I am 521 00:20:00,949 --> 00:20:03,552 And not who you want 522 00:20:03,677 --> 00:20:06,805 For me to be 523 00:20:06,930 --> 00:20:10,709 I am only myself 524 00:20:10,934 --> 00:20:13,462 Myself 525 00:20:13,628 --> 00:20:19,093 Si voy a perderte ya 526 00:20:19,309 --> 00:20:25,015 Que sea por vez final 527 00:20:25,181 --> 00:20:30,145 Si voy a perderte ya 528 00:20:31,455 --> 00:20:33,899 Si voy a perderte 529 00:20:34,024 --> 00:20:37,444 Voy a perderte 530 00:20:37,661 --> 00:20:43,909 Ya... 531 00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:48,873 Yeah 532 00:20:49,039 --> 00:20:51,667 No, no vuelvas 533 00:20:53,043 --> 00:20:55,629 No, no vuelvas 534 00:20:55,795 --> 00:20:57,882 No vuelvas 535 00:20:58,048 --> 00:21:00,426 Si voy a perderte 536 00:21:00,592 --> 00:21:05,264 Ya 537 00:21:05,430 --> 00:21:07,850 (cheering and applause) 538 00:21:21,029 --> 00:21:24,283 {pub}Este amor llega así de esta manera 539 00:21:25,784 --> 00:21:27,198 No tiene la culpa 540 00:21:28,703 --> 00:21:30,661 Caballo de danza vana 541 00:21:30,786 --> 00:21:32,129 Porque muy despreciado 542 00:21:32,254 --> 00:21:33,876 Por eso 543 00:21:34,042 --> 00:21:36,157 No te perdona de llorar 544 00:21:37,837 --> 00:21:40,345 Este amor llega así de esta manera 545 00:21:41,966 --> 00:21:43,848 No tiene la culpa 546 00:21:46,262 --> 00:21:48,057 Amor de comprementa 547 00:21:48,223 --> 00:21:49,892 Amor del pasado 548 00:21:50,058 --> 00:21:52,349 Bembele, bembele, bembele 549 00:21:52,474 --> 00:21:53,841 Bem, bembele, bembele 550 00:21:57,107 --> 00:22:01,445 Bamboleo, bambolea 551 00:22:01,611 --> 00:22:04,862 Porque mi vida, yo la prefiero vivir asi 552 00:22:04,987 --> 00:22:06,867 Bamboleo! 553 00:22:07,033 --> 00:22:09,036 Bambolea! 554 00:22:09,202 --> 00:22:13,707 Porque mi vida, yo la prefiero vivir asi 555 00:22:13,873 --> 00:22:18,045 Would you dance if I asked you to dance? 556 00:22:18,211 --> 00:22:22,007 Would you run and never look back? 557 00:22:22,173 --> 00:22:25,970 Would you cry if you saw me crying? 558 00:22:26,136 --> 00:22:28,559 And would you save my soul tonight? 559 00:22:30,932 --> 00:22:32,977 I can be your hero, baby 560 00:22:33,143 --> 00:22:35,025 La-la-la-la-la 561 00:22:35,150 --> 00:22:36,939 I can kiss away the pain 562 00:22:37,105 --> 00:22:39,274 La-la-la-la-la 563 00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:41,443 I will stand by you forever 564 00:22:41,609 --> 00:22:42,700 La-la-la-la-la 565 00:22:42,825 --> 00:22:45,569 You can take my breath away 566 00:22:45,694 --> 00:22:47,157 You can take my breath away 567 00:22:47,323 --> 00:22:52,329 I can be your hero 568 00:22:52,495 --> 00:22:54,452 (cheering) 569 00:22:55,915 --> 00:22:59,105 Guys, that was some muy serious footwork! 570 00:22:59,775 --> 00:23:01,296 Muy means "very." 571 00:23:01,462 --> 00:23:03,340 I was in it mostly for the boots. 572 00:23:03,506 --> 00:23:06,010 Yeah, what's the deal with those boots? Because wow. 573 00:23:06,176 --> 00:23:08,625 They're Mexican hipster boots. It's kind of like a fad 574 00:23:08,750 --> 00:23:11,557 for groups of guys that are into dance music, 575 00:23:11,723 --> 00:23:13,392 and we're kind of like a dance crew. 576 00:23:13,558 --> 00:23:14,643 Señor Martinez told us about it. 577 00:23:14,809 --> 00:23:16,812 The teeth, the duende, 578 00:23:16,978 --> 00:23:18,480 the bizarre Mexican fads. Señor Martinez is, like, 579 00:23:18,646 --> 00:23:20,566 the best Spanish teacher ever. 580 00:23:20,732 --> 00:23:22,673 I can't wait to see your performance, Mr. Shue. 581 00:23:22,942 --> 00:23:24,278 My performance? 582 00:23:24,444 --> 00:23:26,238 Yeah, to defend your Spanish teacher honor. 583 00:23:26,404 --> 00:23:29,908 I'm sure you have something muy amazing planned. 584 00:23:30,074 --> 00:23:31,289 (bell ringing) 585 00:23:41,419 --> 00:23:42,927 I take it Will told you. 586 00:23:43,213 --> 00:23:44,840 Yes. Will tells me everything. 587 00:23:45,006 --> 00:23:49,261 It is so inappropriate for you to ask him to father your child. 588 00:23:49,427 --> 00:23:52,139 Have a seat, Lady Bird Hollow Pelvis. 589 00:23:52,305 --> 00:23:54,058 And be careful, those chairs are hard. 590 00:23:54,224 --> 00:23:55,642 I know how fragile your bones are. 591 00:23:55,808 --> 00:23:58,609 Okay, look, I know how it feels to want 592 00:23:58,895 --> 00:23:59,730 to start a family. 593 00:23:59,896 --> 00:24:01,065 I want to have a baby, too. 594 00:24:01,231 --> 00:24:02,363 I wouldn't get your hopes up. 595 00:24:02,488 --> 00:24:04,064 I doubt your avian frame could withstand 596 00:24:04,189 --> 00:24:05,319 the rigors of childbirth. 597 00:24:05,485 --> 00:24:06,900 Okay, just tell me, why Will? 598 00:24:07,960 --> 00:24:10,240 You hate him. You've made that very clear. 599 00:24:10,406 --> 00:24:12,039 Well, In case you haven't noticed, Deena, 600 00:24:12,164 --> 00:24:13,660 I have a little bit of a mean streak. 601 00:24:13,826 --> 00:24:17,027 I'm cunning, I'm vindictive, I spend a large portion 602 00:24:17,152 --> 00:24:19,964 of every day vibrating with a palpable sense 603 00:24:20,089 --> 00:24:21,923 of wild, irrational rage. 604 00:24:23,920 --> 00:24:28,050 And I don't ever want my kid to feel that. 605 00:24:28,216 --> 00:24:31,392 And every time I've insulted Will 606 00:24:31,517 --> 00:24:33,310 or tried to stop him in his crusade 607 00:24:33,435 --> 00:24:36,063 to ruin pop culture by wiping his woolly behind 608 00:24:36,188 --> 00:24:38,143 with the American songbook, 609 00:24:38,309 --> 00:24:44,024 he's always risen up and met me with kindness. 610 00:24:44,190 --> 00:24:47,861 If goodness and optimism are somehow genetic, 611 00:24:48,027 --> 00:24:50,952 that's what I want for my child. 612 00:24:57,209 --> 00:24:59,414 He isn't gonna do it, is he? 613 00:24:59,580 --> 00:25:01,250 I prefer to let him tell you that. 614 00:25:01,416 --> 00:25:05,259 I'm really sorry, Sue. 615 00:25:05,545 --> 00:25:07,378 You know, for what it's worth, 616 00:25:07,503 --> 00:25:10,221 I... I think you should have a child. 617 00:25:12,677 --> 00:25:14,392 I think it'd be really good for you. 618 00:25:18,680 --> 00:25:20,064 (bell ringing) 619 00:25:27,741 --> 00:25:30,237 Hey, dude. You want to lift some? 620 00:25:30,403 --> 00:25:31,869 No, thanks. 621 00:25:31,994 --> 00:25:33,620 I've never really understood the whole process. 622 00:25:33,745 --> 00:25:36,123 Plus, I do The Tracey Anderson Method 623 00:25:36,248 --> 00:25:38,409 in the comfort and privacy of my own bedroom. 624 00:25:38,534 --> 00:25:39,567 Hmm. 625 00:25:41,870 --> 00:25:45,210 Why don't you pick up these? 626 00:25:45,376 --> 00:25:47,051 They're from Mrs. Pillsbury. 627 00:25:47,176 --> 00:25:48,807 - College brochures. - What do you got? 628 00:25:49,074 --> 00:25:50,757 Fordham, NYU, Adelphi. 629 00:25:50,923 --> 00:25:52,122 That one's in Long Island. 630 00:25:52,247 --> 00:25:53,957 Yeah, there's a train station right next to the campus 631 00:25:54,082 --> 00:25:55,053 right into Manhattan. 632 00:25:55,219 --> 00:25:57,556 I think they have a football team. 633 00:25:57,722 --> 00:25:59,641 I think they all have musical theater programs, too. 634 00:25:59,807 --> 00:26:00,981 That's sweet, dude, but you know, 635 00:26:01,106 --> 00:26:02,186 college isn't for everyone. 636 00:26:02,352 --> 00:26:03,478 Neither is marriage. 637 00:26:04,937 --> 00:26:06,607 I can't believe she told you. 638 00:26:06,773 --> 00:26:09,234 I can't believe you didn't. We're supposed to be brothers. 639 00:26:09,400 --> 00:26:10,807 Look, I didn't want to put you in 640 00:26:10,932 --> 00:26:11,875 an awkward position with Burt, okay? 641 00:26:12,000 --> 00:26:13,363 I don't want him to know yet. 642 00:26:13,529 --> 00:26:14,445 Hey, you think something 643 00:26:14,570 --> 00:26:16,029 you have to keep from everyone you love 644 00:26:16,154 --> 00:26:18,118 might not be the best idea in the first place? 645 00:26:18,284 --> 00:26:20,084 Don't get down on me about this, dude. 646 00:26:20,209 --> 00:26:21,985 Rachel's, like, the only good thing I've got going 647 00:26:22,110 --> 00:26:23,207 in my life right now. 648 00:26:23,373 --> 00:26:25,000 No, she isn't, Finn. 649 00:26:25,166 --> 00:26:27,669 Look, I get you've had a rough year with finding out 650 00:26:27,835 --> 00:26:29,922 who your dad really is and-and losing the scholarship, 651 00:26:30,088 --> 00:26:33,630 but you're a star, Finn, just as bright as Rachel. 652 00:26:33,755 --> 00:26:35,177 You just don't believe in yourself. 653 00:26:35,343 --> 00:26:36,967 Yeah, well, the proof's in the pudding, okay? 654 00:26:37,092 --> 00:26:39,348 And my pudding pretty much sucks. 655 00:26:39,514 --> 00:26:42,189 Look, I'm not telling you that you shouldn't marry Rachel. 656 00:26:42,314 --> 00:26:43,977 I love her despite all of her crazy, 657 00:26:44,143 --> 00:26:47,064 and I think that you'd be lucky to marry her... one day. 658 00:26:47,230 --> 00:26:48,946 But I don't want you just to turn yourself into nothing 659 00:26:49,071 --> 00:26:50,901 but the guy who holds her purse on the red carpet. 660 00:26:51,067 --> 00:26:52,316 Look, I'm getting to the point in my life where 661 00:26:52,441 --> 00:26:54,446 I kind of need to be honest with myself about who I am. 662 00:26:54,612 --> 00:26:55,822 And who is that? 663 00:26:55,988 --> 00:26:57,754 Not you. 664 00:26:57,879 --> 00:27:00,452 Not Rachel. 665 00:27:00,618 --> 00:27:02,659 That's the point, Finn. 666 00:27:02,784 --> 00:27:05,415 There are plenty of us, trust me. 667 00:27:05,581 --> 00:27:09,002 The one thing that Glee Clubs and theater programs don't have 668 00:27:09,168 --> 00:27:11,964 is the hot, straight football player who can sing and sort of dance. 669 00:27:13,805 --> 00:27:15,429 You're unique, Finn. 670 00:27:15,860 --> 00:27:17,925 And I can't see this proposal thing as anything else 671 00:27:18,050 --> 00:27:20,013 but you giving up on yourself. 672 00:27:20,179 --> 00:27:22,470 No, no, it's not. 673 00:27:25,057 --> 00:27:27,020 At least I don't... I don't think it is. 674 00:27:28,585 --> 00:27:30,335 Your time isn't up, Finn. 675 00:27:31,260 --> 00:27:32,513 It's just beginning. 676 00:27:36,351 --> 00:27:37,851 Hey, Kurt. 677 00:27:40,324 --> 00:27:42,373 Thanks. 678 00:27:45,079 --> 00:27:47,328 (bell ringing) 679 00:27:53,772 --> 00:27:55,299 Hold it right there, Sandbacks. 680 00:27:55,606 --> 00:27:57,301 You and I need to have a serious chat. 681 00:27:57,608 --> 00:27:59,318 Now I realize when I chose Becky 682 00:27:59,443 --> 00:28:00,569 as co-captain for the Cheerios! 683 00:28:00,694 --> 00:28:02,097 it might have rubbed you the wrong way. 684 00:28:02,263 --> 00:28:03,181 Wanky. 685 00:28:03,614 --> 00:28:05,273 And I've often admired the craven heartlessness 686 00:28:05,398 --> 00:28:07,686 of your pointless, vindictive back-stabbing. 687 00:28:08,001 --> 00:28:10,045 Kind of takes me back to the old salad days. 688 00:28:10,170 --> 00:28:11,982 But you crossed the Maginot Line 689 00:28:12,148 --> 00:28:13,900 when you started messing with Sue Sylvester's family. 690 00:28:14,066 --> 00:28:16,028 What are you talking about? What family? 691 00:28:16,194 --> 00:28:18,322 You lodged a complaint about my teaching tactics 692 00:28:18,488 --> 00:28:20,490 with Principal Figgins, possibly derailing my bid 693 00:28:20,747 --> 00:28:23,493 for tenure just when I'm trying to have a baby! 694 00:28:23,717 --> 00:28:26,371 A baby? With whose vagina? 695 00:28:26,603 --> 00:28:28,040 Hey, what is going on here? 696 00:28:28,305 --> 00:28:30,649 Coach Sylvester is accusing me of something I didn't do. 697 00:28:30,774 --> 00:28:33,101 Oh, stop with the lies, sweater meat, or you will be hawking 698 00:28:33,226 --> 00:28:34,921 nude glossies of yourself behind the Dumpster of Hooters 699 00:28:35,087 --> 00:28:36,173 by the weekend. 700 00:28:36,396 --> 00:28:37,406 I know you did this! 701 00:28:37,531 --> 00:28:38,743 Sue, enough! 702 00:28:39,035 --> 00:28:41,386 No one messes with my family. No one. 703 00:28:42,869 --> 00:28:44,947 Oh, and you can rest your fetid, woolly head, William. 704 00:28:45,072 --> 00:28:46,815 I don't need your baby spunk anymore. 705 00:28:46,940 --> 00:28:49,668 Got myself another donor. And a much better one. 706 00:28:49,793 --> 00:28:51,243 Who? 707 00:28:58,785 --> 00:29:01,365 (bell ringing) 708 00:29:01,588 --> 00:29:03,575 (foops approach) 709 00:29:05,291 --> 00:29:07,329 I just got my new pamphlets back from the printer. 710 00:29:07,644 --> 00:29:11,223 I am feeling so Stephen King with these things lately. 711 00:29:11,348 --> 00:29:13,275 You know, just so prolific. 712 00:29:13,400 --> 00:29:14,943 That's great, Em, but I really need 713 00:29:15,068 --> 00:29:16,895 to translate this song for my big number tomorrow. 714 00:29:17,020 --> 00:29:19,091 It's my last chance to wow the kids with my español. 715 00:29:19,439 --> 00:29:20,884 By the end of the week, I need 716 00:29:21,141 --> 00:29:22,651 every single one of those kids begging Figgins 717 00:29:22,776 --> 00:29:24,903 to give me that tenure spot. 718 00:29:25,028 --> 00:29:27,155 Conversación. Of course. 719 00:29:27,280 --> 00:29:29,658 "Conversation" in Spanish is conversación. 720 00:29:29,783 --> 00:29:31,500 (sighs) 721 00:29:35,565 --> 00:29:37,609 Do you realize how important this tenure is for us, 722 00:29:37,841 --> 00:29:39,051 if we want to start a family? 723 00:29:39,176 --> 00:29:41,053 It means we will always be able to feed our kids, 724 00:29:41,178 --> 00:29:43,323 get them health insurance. 725 00:29:46,049 --> 00:29:47,559 Emma, enough! 726 00:29:47,684 --> 00:29:51,003 Can't you see I'm doing this to take care of you? 727 00:29:52,672 --> 00:29:55,752 Okay, I think I can take care of myself. 728 00:29:55,918 --> 00:29:57,921 You know what, I'm sorry. 729 00:29:58,178 --> 00:29:59,855 I just wanted to show you my new pamphlets. 730 00:29:59,980 --> 00:30:01,239 I'm really proud of them. 731 00:30:01,364 --> 00:30:04,219 They're silly, Emma. I'm sorry, I love you, 732 00:30:04,517 --> 00:30:06,495 but do you really think the kids take them seriously? 733 00:30:06,620 --> 00:30:07,440 Okay, you know what? 734 00:30:07,565 --> 00:30:09,581 I know that the titles are silly; that's the point. 735 00:30:09,706 --> 00:30:11,950 Sometimes you have to be a little provocative 736 00:30:12,075 --> 00:30:14,002 if you want to get teenagers' attention. 737 00:30:14,127 --> 00:30:15,772 They're conversación starters. 738 00:30:15,938 --> 00:30:17,482 And you're being really mean. 739 00:30:17,714 --> 00:30:19,614 You got a pamphlet for that? 740 00:30:20,584 --> 00:30:22,279 Emma, I'm sorry. 741 00:30:22,502 --> 00:30:23,738 Emma, wait. 742 00:30:28,367 --> 00:30:30,559 (Madonna's "La Isla Bonita" begins) 743 00:30:32,579 --> 00:30:34,761 Como puede ser verdad? 744 00:30:36,366 --> 00:30:40,422 Last night I dreamt of San Pedro 745 00:30:40,671 --> 00:30:44,593 Just like I'd never gone, I knew the song 746 00:30:44,841 --> 00:30:49,421 A young girl with eyes like the desert 747 00:30:49,546 --> 00:30:53,105 It all seems like yesterday, not far away 748 00:30:53,809 --> 00:30:55,312 BOTH: Tropical the island breeze 749 00:30:55,478 --> 00:30:57,763 All of nature wild and free 750 00:30:57,888 --> 00:30:59,191 This is where I long to be 751 00:30:59,357 --> 00:31:01,483 La isla bonita 752 00:31:01,608 --> 00:31:04,154 And when the samba played 753 00:31:04,320 --> 00:31:05,614 The sun would set so high 754 00:31:05,780 --> 00:31:08,158 Ring through my ears and sting my eyes 755 00:31:08,324 --> 00:31:11,953 Your Spanish lullaby 756 00:31:12,202 --> 00:31:15,123 I fell in love with San Pedro 757 00:31:15,289 --> 00:31:17,148 Mr. Shue, what's with the shiny coat? 758 00:31:17,273 --> 00:31:18,500 I thought you were Kurt. 759 00:31:18,625 --> 00:31:21,546 I'm an authentic Spanish matador. 760 00:31:21,712 --> 00:31:25,509 Te dijo te amo 761 00:31:25,675 --> 00:31:29,262 I prayed that the days would last, they went so fast 762 00:31:29,428 --> 00:31:31,306 Tropical the island breeze 763 00:31:31,472 --> 00:31:33,515 All of nature wild and free 764 00:31:33,640 --> 00:31:35,467 This is where I long to be 765 00:31:35,592 --> 00:31:37,979 La isla bonita 766 00:31:38,145 --> 00:31:40,355 And when the samba played 767 00:31:40,480 --> 00:31:42,057 The sun would set so high 768 00:31:42,182 --> 00:31:43,610 Ring through my ears and sting my eyes 769 00:31:43,776 --> 00:31:47,145 Your Spanish lullaby 770 00:31:47,270 --> 00:31:51,243 Yo quiero estar donde el sol toca el cielo 771 00:31:51,409 --> 00:31:53,453 Cuando es hora de siesta 772 00:31:53,619 --> 00:31:55,120 Tu los puedes ver pasar 773 00:31:55,245 --> 00:31:57,791 Caras tan bellas 774 00:31:57,957 --> 00:32:00,085 Se importan nada 775 00:32:00,333 --> 00:32:05,298 Where a girl loves a boy, and a boy 776 00:32:05,464 --> 00:32:06,758 Loves a girl 777 00:32:06,924 --> 00:32:09,761 Ah, ah, ah, ah 778 00:32:09,927 --> 00:32:12,504 Ooh-ooh-ooh ooh-ooh oooh 779 00:32:12,629 --> 00:32:14,873 - Your Spanish lullaby - Hey 780 00:32:14,998 --> 00:32:17,394 Tropical the island breeze 781 00:32:17,560 --> 00:32:19,062 All of nature wild and free 782 00:32:19,228 --> 00:32:21,856 This is where I long to be 783 00:32:22,022 --> 00:32:23,483 La isla bonita 784 00:32:23,649 --> 00:32:25,944 And when the samba played 785 00:32:26,176 --> 00:32:28,488 The sun would set so high, ring through my ears 786 00:32:28,654 --> 00:32:29,888 And sting my eyes 787 00:32:30,013 --> 00:32:31,699 Your Spanish lullaby 788 00:32:31,824 --> 00:32:33,368 Yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah 789 00:32:33,534 --> 00:32:34,910 Bop-bop-bop bop-ba 790 00:32:35,035 --> 00:32:36,496 Ooh 791 00:32:36,662 --> 00:32:39,583 Oooh, yeah 792 00:32:39,749 --> 00:32:41,126 La isla bonita 793 00:32:41,292 --> 00:32:42,233 La isla 794 00:32:42,358 --> 00:32:44,836 Bonita 795 00:32:44,961 --> 00:32:47,575 Bonita, bonita 796 00:32:47,700 --> 00:32:50,093 Your Spanish lullaby 797 00:32:52,386 --> 00:32:53,638 (cheering) 798 00:32:53,804 --> 00:32:55,473 SANTANA: Ladies and gentlemen, 799 00:32:55,639 --> 00:32:57,039 David Martinez. 800 00:32:59,643 --> 00:33:01,271 Santana, fantástico. 801 00:33:01,437 --> 00:33:02,272 David, I'm just 802 00:33:02,438 --> 00:33:03,922 a little... I don't know... 803 00:33:04,047 --> 00:33:06,547 confused about your participation here. 804 00:33:09,737 --> 00:33:11,323 And, hey, wasn't that number fantastic 805 00:33:11,489 --> 00:33:12,991 and truly authentic? 806 00:33:13,157 --> 00:33:14,866 (cheering, applause) 807 00:33:14,991 --> 00:33:16,536 DAVID: Thank you very much, everyone. 808 00:33:16,702 --> 00:33:18,788 Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a stack of 809 00:33:18,954 --> 00:33:20,582 night school exams on my desk 810 00:33:20,748 --> 00:33:23,335 that won't grade themselves, so buenas noches. 811 00:33:23,501 --> 00:33:24,127 Muchas gracias. 812 00:33:24,293 --> 00:33:25,253 Bye-bye. 813 00:33:25,419 --> 00:33:27,756 Well, Mr. Shue, the floor is all yours. 814 00:33:27,922 --> 00:33:30,382 - I'm excited. - Yay, Mr. Shue. 815 00:33:30,507 --> 00:33:32,374 Really, I'm excited. Mr. Shue, you got this! 816 00:33:35,661 --> 00:33:37,291 {pub}Ya-ha-ha-ha-hi! 817 00:33:37,416 --> 00:33:39,043 (mariachi music playing) 818 00:33:39,168 --> 00:33:42,504 (whooping): Ow-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! 819 00:33:49,929 --> 00:33:53,490 A little less conversation, a little more action, please 820 00:33:53,656 --> 00:33:57,827 All this aggravation ain't satisfactioning me 821 00:33:57,993 --> 00:33:59,996 A little more bite, a little less bark 822 00:34:00,162 --> 00:34:01,748 A little less fight, a little more spark 823 00:34:01,914 --> 00:34:03,625 Close your mouth and open up your heart 824 00:34:03,791 --> 00:34:05,186 And baby, satisfy me 825 00:34:05,311 --> 00:34:08,254 Satisfy me, baby 826 00:34:08,420 --> 00:34:10,340 Vamos ir a los dos escuchar la musica 827 00:34:10,506 --> 00:34:11,942 Y viajar por la brisa de verano 828 00:34:12,067 --> 00:34:14,829 Que buenisima la noche ya te enseñe como salga 829 00:34:14,954 --> 00:34:17,138 Andale, muchacha, ven, relájate 830 00:34:17,304 --> 00:34:20,835 Menos conversación y mas accion, por favor 831 00:34:20,960 --> 00:34:24,521 Este agravamiento no me satisface a mi 832 00:34:24,687 --> 00:34:27,315 A ltle more bite, a little less bark 833 00:34:27,481 --> 00:34:29,009 A little less fight, a little more spark 834 00:34:29,134 --> 00:34:32,637 No hablas mas y abre tu corazon y satisfaceme 835 00:34:32,903 --> 00:34:35,615 Satisfaceme, bebe 836 00:34:36,282 --> 00:34:39,452 Come on, baby, I'm tired of talking 837 00:34:39,618 --> 00:34:43,214 Grab your coat and let's start walking 838 00:34:43,581 --> 00:34:47,645 A little less conversation, a little more action, please 839 00:34:47,770 --> 00:34:52,215 All this aggravation ain't satisfactioning me 840 00:34:52,381 --> 00:34:54,592 A little more bite, a little less bark 841 00:34:54,758 --> 00:34:56,487 A little less fight, a little more spark 842 00:34:56,612 --> 00:34:57,929 Shut your mouth and open up your heart 843 00:34:58,095 --> 00:34:59,973 And, baby, satisfy me 844 00:35:00,139 --> 00:35:02,934 Satisfy me, baby 845 00:35:03,100 --> 00:35:05,687 Menos conversación y mas accion, por favor 846 00:35:05,853 --> 00:35:07,230 Hey! Muchas gracias. 847 00:35:07,396 --> 00:35:09,750 (cheering, applause) 848 00:35:10,024 --> 00:35:11,342 (chuckles) 849 00:35:12,818 --> 00:35:14,404 It was you. 850 00:35:14,570 --> 00:35:16,364 You're the one who complained to Principal Figgins about me. 851 00:35:16,530 --> 00:35:18,908 Yeah, and I'd do it all over again after that performance. 852 00:35:19,074 --> 00:35:20,627 You're messing with adult things here, Santana. 853 00:35:20,752 --> 00:35:22,954 This is my job. This is my life. 854 00:35:23,120 --> 00:35:25,632 And this is my education, and it's not a joke to me, 855 00:35:25,757 --> 00:35:27,459 although it seems to be one to you. 856 00:35:27,625 --> 00:35:29,711 What are you talking about? They all loved my performance. 857 00:35:29,877 --> 00:35:31,155 Because they don't know any better. 858 00:35:31,280 --> 00:35:33,339 It's your fault. You're their teacher. 859 00:35:33,505 --> 00:35:36,717 You went from "La Cucaracha" to a bullfighting mariachi. 860 00:35:36,842 --> 00:35:40,054 Why don't you just dress up as the Taco Bell Chihuahua 861 00:35:40,220 --> 00:35:42,223 and bark the theme song to Dora the Explorer?< 862 00:35:42,389 --> 00:35:44,434 You don't even know enough to be embarrassed 863 00:35:44,600 --> 00:35:46,936 about these stereotypes that you're perpetuating. 864 00:35:47,102 --> 00:35:48,354 That's not fair. Isn't it? 865 00:35:48,520 --> 00:35:51,399 What did you want to be when you grew up? 866 00:35:51,565 --> 00:35:53,668 Why did you become a Spanish teacher, Mr. Shue? 867 00:35:57,163 --> 00:35:58,164 Because... 868 00:36:03,196 --> 00:36:06,481 it was the only teaching position open at the time. 869 00:36:08,800 --> 00:36:11,645 I want to remind you of something that 870 00:36:11,770 --> 00:36:14,005 an amazing teacher once taught me: 871 00:36:14,171 --> 00:36:17,465 without passion, you can't succeed. 872 00:36:18,694 --> 00:36:19,994 Who taught you that? 873 00:36:20,344 --> 00:36:21,989 You did. 874 00:36:22,114 --> 00:36:23,457 And you do. 875 00:36:23,582 --> 00:36:24,933 When you teach Glee. 876 00:36:29,103 --> 00:36:31,873 I'm telling you, there's no word but "genius." 877 00:36:32,107 --> 00:36:33,733 I wouldn't call it that. 878 00:36:33,899 --> 00:36:35,360 What's genius? My plan for Regionals? 879 00:36:35,526 --> 00:36:38,363 No. Your lil'punkin's pamphlets. 880 00:36:39,697 --> 00:36:40,782 "Taint Misbehavin'." 881 00:36:40,948 --> 00:36:41,709 Mm-hmm. 882 00:36:41,834 --> 00:36:43,026 It's all about the importance 883 00:36:43,151 --> 00:36:44,577 of thoroughly washing your jockstrap. 884 00:36:44,743 --> 00:36:46,162 (chuckles) Hey, bub, 885 00:36:46,328 --> 00:36:48,289 MRSA bacteria infection is no laughing matter. 886 00:36:48,455 --> 00:36:49,415 No matter how much I talked 887 00:36:49,675 --> 00:36:52,710 to my guys about the steamy lurking dangers, 888 00:36:52,876 --> 00:36:53,753 nobody cared 889 00:36:54,012 --> 00:36:56,005 Until Emma found a way to get through to them. 890 00:36:56,171 --> 00:36:57,925 Come on, guys! 891 00:36:58,050 --> 00:37:01,095 Why, just last week, three Fort Wayne gymnasts 892 00:37:01,220 --> 00:37:03,547 had to have their junk amputated! 893 00:37:03,672 --> 00:37:06,183 I stopped washing down there 'cause it seemed kind of gay. 894 00:37:06,308 --> 00:37:08,518 I thought that's what the hair was for: catching the dirt. 895 00:37:09,027 --> 00:37:10,688 Huh. Lift and scrub. 896 00:37:10,813 --> 00:37:12,146 Who knew it was so easy? 897 00:37:12,447 --> 00:37:14,232 BEISTE: And now their kibbles and bits are 898 00:37:14,449 --> 00:37:15,942 as clean as a little angel's tear. 899 00:37:16,108 --> 00:37:18,061 And when I showed that to my Cooter, 900 00:37:18,186 --> 00:37:21,948 not only did he order 10,000 copies for Ohio State, 901 00:37:22,114 --> 00:37:25,285 he got every team in the Big Ten to order copies, too. 902 00:37:25,451 --> 00:37:27,495 - Wow, that's... - It's genius! 903 00:37:27,661 --> 00:37:29,998 I have never met a teacher whose passion 904 00:37:30,164 --> 00:37:31,833 literally saves lives. 905 00:37:31,999 --> 00:37:33,376 Aren't you proud of her, Will? 906 00:37:34,752 --> 00:37:36,280 Yes. 907 00:37:36,405 --> 00:37:37,338 Absolutely. 908 00:37:38,922 --> 00:37:40,383 Genius! You! 909 00:37:40,549 --> 00:37:41,550 EMMA: Stop. 910 00:37:44,680 --> 00:37:47,223 {pub}And the award for Best Conjugator goes to 911 00:37:47,389 --> 00:37:48,393 Señora Stephanie. 912 00:37:48,518 --> 00:37:49,601 (laughs) 913 00:37:50,887 --> 00:37:53,531 Thank you, Señor Martinez. 914 00:37:53,656 --> 00:37:55,734 And thanks to you, Claudia knows now 915 00:37:55,859 --> 00:37:57,935 to go before she comes to work. 916 00:37:58,060 --> 00:37:59,527 (laughs) 917 00:37:59,693 --> 00:38:02,071 Now finally, Most Improved: 918 00:38:02,237 --> 00:38:04,542 Will Schuester. 919 00:38:04,667 --> 00:38:06,044 - Wow. - Come on, man! 920 00:38:06,169 --> 00:38:07,744 (chuckles) Thanks. 921 00:38:07,910 --> 00:38:09,542 Wow, I... 922 00:38:09,667 --> 00:38:10,455 (school bell ringing) Oh. 923 00:38:10,707 --> 00:38:11,666 Fue un año maravilloso. 924 00:38:11,791 --> 00:38:12,999 It was a beautiful year, everyone. 925 00:38:13,259 --> 00:38:14,417 Gracias. Hey, de nada. 926 00:38:14,677 --> 00:38:16,461 Gracias. (chuckles) 927 00:38:16,679 --> 00:38:18,840 Your teeth are like fresh-driven snow white. 928 00:38:18,965 --> 00:38:20,506 Like Larry Bird white. 929 00:38:20,672 --> 00:38:22,427 (Will and David laugh) 930 00:38:22,552 --> 00:38:24,093 Most Improved. 931 00:38:24,259 --> 00:38:27,055 I don't think that's the award a Spanish teacher wants to get 932 00:38:27,221 --> 00:38:28,466 in Spanish class. 933 00:38:28,591 --> 00:38:31,486 Will, man, you work hard, you take care of your kids. 934 00:38:31,611 --> 00:38:33,102 They're very lucky to have you, man. 935 00:38:33,268 --> 00:38:34,939 They deserve better. 936 00:38:35,064 --> 00:38:36,147 They deserve you. 937 00:38:36,313 --> 00:38:38,650 Oh, so when do I start? (laughs) 938 00:38:38,816 --> 00:38:40,568 How about Monday? 939 00:38:40,734 --> 00:38:41,979 I spoke to Figgins. 940 00:38:42,104 --> 00:38:44,315 I had all the kids go in and talk to him, as well. 941 00:38:44,440 --> 00:38:47,075 They all want to take Spanish if you're the teacher. 942 00:38:47,241 --> 00:38:49,011 What, he's offering me a job? 943 00:38:51,280 --> 00:38:52,290 Teaching? 944 00:38:52,415 --> 00:38:53,623 During the day? 945 00:38:53,789 --> 00:38:56,350 (chuckles): I hope you're not a vampire. 946 00:38:56,959 --> 00:38:58,461 Oh, man. 947 00:38:58,627 --> 00:38:59,337 (laughs) 948 00:38:59,503 --> 00:39:01,255 Okay. 949 00:39:01,421 --> 00:39:03,883 Oh, man, you don... you don't understand. 950 00:39:04,049 --> 00:39:05,551 My-My parents, 951 00:39:05,717 --> 00:39:07,439 my parents were immigrants. 952 00:39:07,564 --> 00:39:10,275 And they had to lie about their citizenship 953 00:39:10,400 --> 00:39:12,227 to go to high school. 954 00:39:12,352 --> 00:39:14,529 And now I'm teaching it. 955 00:39:14,654 --> 00:39:16,187 It's the American Dream, right? 956 00:39:16,406 --> 00:39:17,689 Yeah. (chuckles) 957 00:39:17,855 --> 00:39:19,451 But what about you? 958 00:39:19,576 --> 00:39:22,754 Oh, there's-there's an opening in the History department. 959 00:39:22,879 --> 00:39:24,278 I've always loved history. 960 00:39:24,444 --> 00:39:26,114 Well, the History Channel, at least. 961 00:39:26,280 --> 00:39:28,533 - Right. - Maybe I'll find my duende there. 962 00:39:28,699 --> 00:39:31,496 No, I've seen you, I've seen you teach Glee Club, man. 963 00:39:31,621 --> 00:39:33,830 You have duende coming out of your orejas. 964 00:39:34,955 --> 00:39:36,416 - Ears. - Ears, right. 965 00:39:36,582 --> 00:39:37,702 I got you. (laughs) 966 00:39:37,827 --> 00:39:38,876 Thank you so much. 967 00:39:39,042 --> 00:39:41,372 Thank you. 968 00:39:41,497 --> 00:39:44,507 So, wait a minute, who ended up getting the tenure position? 969 00:39:48,844 --> 00:39:50,715 Thank you, Becky. 970 00:39:50,840 --> 00:39:53,985 My online pharmacist has recommended these 971 00:39:54,110 --> 00:39:56,438 fertility injections every day, twice a day, 972 00:39:56,563 --> 00:39:59,355 until Little Susie or Little Sylvester catches. 973 00:39:59,521 --> 00:40:00,398 You down with that? 974 00:40:00,564 --> 00:40:01,899 No problem, Coach. 975 00:40:04,020 --> 00:40:05,194 What's wrong? 976 00:40:05,360 --> 00:40:07,488 Coach, I have a confession to make. 977 00:40:07,654 --> 00:40:09,117 Take a seat. 978 00:40:09,242 --> 00:40:10,533 Now, if this is about 979 00:40:10,699 --> 00:40:13,972 the complaint you lodged against me with Principal Figgins, 980 00:40:14,097 --> 00:40:15,371 I already know. 981 00:40:15,537 --> 00:40:16,456 You do, Coach? 982 00:40:16,622 --> 00:40:17,692 Oh, Becky, I've known 983 00:40:17,817 --> 00:40:19,294 ever since I tinker-tailor-soldier-spied 984 00:40:19,419 --> 00:40:21,419 my way into Figgins's file cabinet and read 985 00:40:21,585 --> 00:40:22,462 the evaluation cards. 986 00:40:22,628 --> 00:40:23,681 And when I saw one 987 00:40:23,806 --> 00:40:25,150 written in crayon, I knew it was either 988 00:40:25,275 --> 00:40:27,425 you or Brittany, and you're the better speller. 989 00:40:27,591 --> 00:40:28,553 Coach, I'm sorry. 990 00:40:28,678 --> 00:40:30,094 I was just looking out for the team. 991 00:40:30,260 --> 00:40:33,691 Did you mean what you wrote? 992 00:40:33,816 --> 00:40:36,184 That you're worried I'm not as focused on the Cheerios! 993 00:40:36,350 --> 00:40:37,769 as I used to be? 994 00:40:37,935 --> 00:40:39,397 Well, then you don't need be sorry. 995 00:40:39,522 --> 00:40:41,773 And thank you for the feedback. 996 00:40:41,939 --> 00:40:43,191 You're not mad? 997 00:40:43,357 --> 00:40:44,692 No, Becky. 998 00:40:44,858 --> 00:40:46,070 (sighs) 999 00:40:46,195 --> 00:40:49,822 But impending motherhood doth given me perspective. 1000 00:40:49,988 --> 00:40:53,701 Oh, Becky, I'm reminded of all my passions: winning, 1001 00:40:53,867 --> 00:40:54,994 my girls, 1002 00:40:55,160 --> 00:40:56,798 destroying my enemies. 1003 00:40:56,923 --> 00:40:58,466 Motherhood's not gonna change that. 1004 00:40:58,591 --> 00:41:01,209 If anything, it makes me want them far more. 1005 00:41:01,375 --> 00:41:03,922 You're an excellent co-captain, Becky. 1006 00:41:04,047 --> 00:41:05,713 You're like me. 1007 00:41:05,879 --> 00:41:07,509 Not afraid to make the tough calls. 1008 00:41:07,634 --> 00:41:08,883 Coach? 1009 00:41:09,049 --> 00:41:10,949 You're gonna be a great mom. 1010 00:41:22,312 --> 00:41:24,950 (school bell ringing) 1011 00:41:37,953 --> 00:41:39,874 There you are, baby. You ready? 1012 00:41:39,999 --> 00:41:41,874 For lunch. 1013 00:41:42,040 --> 00:41:43,251 We're going off-campus, right? 1014 00:41:43,417 --> 00:41:44,919 Hey, Sam. 1015 00:41:57,567 --> 00:41:59,901 (school bell ringing faintly) 1016 00:42:05,191 --> 00:42:06,607 What's all this? 1017 00:42:11,781 --> 00:42:15,617 "So You Were A Jerk To Your Fiance." 1018 00:42:17,286 --> 00:42:20,746 Not particularly clever, but I appreciate your pith. 1019 00:42:23,062 --> 00:42:25,710 (laughs): "Congratulations... I Love You." 1020 00:42:25,876 --> 00:42:27,211 These are wonderful. 1021 00:42:27,377 --> 00:42:28,590 They're wonderful. 1022 00:42:28,715 --> 00:42:30,041 (both chuckle) 1023 00:42:30,166 --> 00:42:33,217 A little myopic maybe, but a great first effort. 1024 00:42:37,056 --> 00:42:38,431 I'm so proud of you. 1025 00:42:38,674 --> 00:42:41,519 So do I call you Professor or Madam or what? 1026 00:42:41,644 --> 00:42:43,237 I'm not sure of the protocol here. 1027 00:42:43,362 --> 00:42:44,522 No, no, no, it's just tenure. 1028 00:42:44,647 --> 00:42:45,773 You can call me Emma. 1029 00:42:45,898 --> 00:42:48,232 Or sweetheart or cutie pie or doll-face. 1030 00:42:48,398 --> 00:42:49,393 - Or Professor Doll-Face. - Ooh. 1031 00:42:49,518 --> 00:42:50,495 I like Professor Doll-Face. 1032 00:42:50,620 --> 00:42:52,695 (laughs) 1033 00:42:52,861 --> 00:42:54,065 (clears throat) 1034 00:42:54,190 --> 00:42:56,157 My first marriage didn't work out because my wife 1035 00:42:56,323 --> 00:42:57,366 didn't believe in me. 1036 00:42:57,532 --> 00:43:01,287 And then I go and pull the same crap on you. 1037 00:43:01,453 --> 00:43:05,259 All I know is that right now, in this moment, 1038 00:43:05,384 --> 00:43:08,880 I just want it to stop. 1039 00:43:09,005 --> 00:43:13,132 I want to sit here, eat some chicken and look back on 1040 00:43:13,298 --> 00:43:15,218 everything you've done to get to this moment 1041 00:43:15,384 --> 00:43:19,256 and everything I'm going to do from this moment on 1042 00:43:19,381 --> 00:43:23,851 to make sure you feel... as special... and amazing 1043 00:43:24,017 --> 00:43:26,655 as I know you are. 1044 00:43:32,187 --> 00:43:34,820 Sync and correction by Mlmlte www.addic7ed.com